whatohitsonfirewelp

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perciver in another universe

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Perciver's dynamic is NOT grumpy x sunshine. It is actually obsessive nerd x obsessive jock (who just so happen to be obsessed with each other). Get it right.

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Percy Weasley HC: Music

When I see headcannons about Percy Weasley, some of them are about his music taste which normally head cannoned as jazz or classical music which I understand because it fits his vibe. But I love the idea of a smart, nerdy looking perfect prefect Percy listening to Riot Grrl. (For those who don't know, riot grrl is like femal metal that talks about sexism, misogny and is about feminism. It also occurs during 1970s to 1990s so it makes sense historically as well.)

Percy is an intelligent person so he should be able to see that sexism and misogny is wrong and that the sterotypes about genders are incorrect. (Feminist Percy Weasley is my life.)

So one day he listening to the radio at the burrow which no one else is really paying attention to and hears it for the first time and instantly gets obsessed. He wants to help the women and is inspired by the music which could tie into his obsession with the ministry because he wants to fix the corruption and sexism in the country. It's one of the reasons he wanted to be Minister of Magic so he could try and help end sexism and gender sterotypes.

Also he 100% had a Walkman cassette tape. It was made in 1979 and was actually really popular. Riot Grrl surfaced in 1970s to 1990s so it just makes sense to me that Percy would have a walkman and listen to female rock. Oh and his favouite bands are The Slits and Bikini Kill. His favourite songs are 'New Radio' and 'Rebel Girl'.

(And imaging sweet prefect perfect Percy Weasley who no one has ever seen do a wrong thing, listening to Riot Grrl and singing along to the lyrics, yes, even the swears, is funny to me and I hold this hc close to my heart. And did I spend 30 minutes researching so it all makes sense with the production of the Walkman and when the bands were formed? Yes. Yes I did. Do I regret it? absolutely not.)

(Oh and Oliver 100% found him singing vulgar lyrics and fell for him even more. Also Oliver would be opposite and listen to Jazz and classical because I love couples that have interests that are like the complete opposite to what their vibe is or what other people think and it's unpredictable and no one would believe it until they saw it themselves. While Percy has a walkman, Oliver would have collections of vinyls just like in Good Old Fashioned Lover Boy. Whenever the gryffindors in the common room hear just heavy metal from their dorm, they assume it's Oliver when it's actually Percy.)

Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk. Here is my conclusion Clears throat

#Percy Weasley Defense squad #Perciver

Audience cheers and applaudes.

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Percy Weasley…. with a sleeper build??

Percy Weasley who carries around SO MANY FUCKING BOOKS ALL THE TIME

+ His heavy ass school bag

+ Moving said books around to place them at various heights on shelves and in his room

Taught himself to be ambidextrous to be as versatile when studying as possible which means FOREARMS

But he’s skinny asf and no you can’t really see it

(Especially in comparison to Oliver Wood, who’s built like a fridge and is a healthy 6’2)

And I do mean he LOOKS skinny like enough people have seen him without a shirt (brothers, other family members, Oliver, people in vicinity while swimming and such) and that boy is thin okay 

But there was this one time when Percy went to move a whole stack of textbooks from his bed to somewhere else, and because he’s wearing a short sleeve pajama-esque T-shirt (probably Oliver’s), Oliver half spit his drink out because ARMS??

SINCE THE FUCK WHEN?? FUCKING WHERE??

Listen if you think that kid hasn’t built up muscle from a quidditch crazy family that makes him play all the time, Molly Weasley’s hearty cooking, carrying around his own books and probably other people’s sometimes and helps shorter kids put theirs on the higher shelves in the library all day every day, you’re crazy

But because he’s like 6’5 it gets distributed differently and he looks like a candy cane no matter what

Sometimes you can see it when he’s carrying enough books at once, and upon discovering this, Oliver will poke at Percy’s arms in wonder and it makes Percy flush but he secretly kinda loves it

Yeah one time Percy surprised them both after Gryffindor won a particularly large match and he PICKED UP OLIVER (all 200+ lbs of him) AND SPUN HIM AROUND IN EXCITEMENT

“WHAT THE FUCK I DIDN’T KNOW YOU COULD DO THAT”

“I DIDN’T KNOW I COULD DO THAT EITHER”

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i love how all perciver fans have agreed that perciver is the most oblivious couple on the planet. yes percy is a genius and oliver’s pretty smart too, but together? they’re so stupid. oh my god they’re so fucking dumb

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Perciver is like, once a year Oliver and Percy meet up so Percy can file Oliver’s taxes and he’s like, if we were married we would save a lot of money on taxes bc we’d be in a different tax bracket.

What Percy means: If we’d find a woman to settle down with.

What Oliver heard: If you and I are getting married.

Oliver is like, deal, and starts planning their wedding.

Percy is only slightly confused when Oliver sets up meetings where they scout for locations for events like a wedding or go cake tasting at different bakeries or get their measurements taken for new suits. They have done similar things before.

Oliver makes lists of close friends and family to invite to their wedding and Percy is thinking they have a normal conversation about who they like and don’t like.

The weirdest one is when Oliver drags Percy out of bed early in the morning to go look at flowers but Percy is too sleepy to really register anything.

Percy is only getting suspicious when people around him congratulate him to his relationship with a famous quidditch player. (But people are surprised by that all the time when he mentions that he knows the rising star of Puddlemere United.) Not really knowing that Oliver had the Newspaper announcing their engagement.

At the next Family Dinner they all are ‘we are happy for you but you could have told us beforehand’ and ‘we suspected for years’.

Percy still doesn’t know what is going on.

He only understands everything one afternoon when he is babysitting his niece Victoire and she is asking all the questions about how Oliver and Percy are gonna have kids after their wedding (where she’s planned to be a flower girl) and Percy is like what are you talking about and she shows him the wedding invitation they’ve got by then (flashback to how Oliver and him had picked out the paper design) and he gets an existential crisis while Vic keeps playing with her dolls in the background. When her parents come back he talking panicky to his Big Bro Bill like ‘Holy shit I’m getting married!!!!’ and Bill is just like, ‘don’t worry, I was nervous too, but it’s the best thing in world right after becoming a father and I highly doubt your wedding will be crashed by death eaters!’

And this is like a week before the wedding. Percy goes to Oliver, jokingly saying ‘Haha, all of this bc of taxes! Don’t think we’ll be saving as much as we spend on the wedding!’

And Oliver says the cheesiest thing about ‘This wedding is my investment in a life with you well spent’ it makes only halfway sense. Which makes Percy go think ‘Damn I’m in love with a dork… wait… WAIT! I’m In Love!’

Bonus points if Oliver knew that Percy was oblivious to what he was planning and waited for him realising it.

After that Percy is kidnapped by his siblings for a bachelor party.

Neither of them are jewellery people so they almost forgot about getting matching rings.

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I got caught drawing perciver angst by my geography teacher. She told me to show it to the class. She asked who it as and if it was my boyfriend or someone from history. I lied and said it was Julius Caesar and Pompey. KILL ME.

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Percy Weasley headcanon time, part 2!

all the Quidditch captains at Hogwarts crushed HARD on him

Oliver Wood: obvious reasons, they are roommates (oh my god, they are roommates), they're in every class together, Percy has canonically been at Gryffindor's Quidditch matches, etc. i could go on.

Roger Davies: captain of the Ravenclaw in case you don't remember( can't blame ya). but Percy is smart and clever, he would charm the pants of any Ravenclaw without even trying. a fellow scholar who plays Quidditch too. everytime Ravenclaw meets Gryffindor, he tries to impress but fails cause Oliver Wood.

Cedric Diggory: he got the biggest boy crush on Percy and it was literally his bi awakening. not only is Percy smart, but he's also incredibly kind and responsible. he takes a page of Percy's book and values good sportmanship (this is the reason why the twins can't stand him, they've seen him yearning after their brother)

Marcus Flint: he doesn't like any Gryffindor at all, not even when pigs fly and it rains lava. but Percy is different, he's the Golden Student of not only Gryffindor, but of the whole school (no he doesn't count Hermione). Percy is smart, clever, determined, kind, righteous and so incredibly pretty. if it wasn't for his blood status, then Percy would've been poster child of "the ideal spouse" the pureblood families always nags about.

Conclusion: Oliver and Marcus gets into fistfights every week because of this and no one relents until someone is nearly dead (the only reason Snape gives detention to a Slytherin, of all things, cause he didn't sign up for his own student's blood feud)

Poor Roger Davies gets friendzoned the whole time cause Percy genuinely believes they're friends and he can't ruin that cause Penelope Clearwater will literally murder him in his sleep

Cedric decides to play it safe, earn Percy's affection slowly and maybe the Perfect Prefect will fall for him...eventually.

Too bad Fred and George is deadset on NO ONE dates their brother...except maybe Oliver Wood, but he has to prove himself with twelve quests (that was a total lie)

Outcome: Percy eventually dates Oliver Wood and he's incredibly happy with him. He doesn't even know that his five brothers and baby sister threatens Oliver if he ever hurt him. He's mildly annoyed when he finds out, though.

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ik we’ve studied the drarry to jegulus pipeline, and we’ve dug into the deamus/wolfstar phenomenon but has anyone figured out the connection between Perciver and Jily yet??

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OLIVER STARK as EVAN ‘BUCK’ BUCKLEY 9-1-1 - S08 E11 · Holy Mother of God

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sister AND ex-boyfriend both believing you're in love with your best friend is crazy work. implying the only thing holding you back is his sexuality is even crazier work

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in the club freakin it in a sensitive style

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Chim: I just saw Buck crying in the locker room for five minutes, then his phone alarm went off, he stopped crying and went right back to the gym?

Ravi: Yeah, he does that now.

Hen: Don't worry about him, he's fine, that's just his AMEB routine.

Chim: His what?

Hen: Assigned missing Eddie break.

Buck: Also known as time management, look it up.

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Ravi: Things Gucci with you, sir?

Buck: I'm not gonna lie to you Ravi, they're Goodwill at best.

Bobby: I don’t know what this means, but I feel like I should be concerned.

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Guys I’m not done complaining about fics because what do you mean the Chicago fire fandom has had YEARS to write the most insane fic of Matthew Casey also being Robert chase and NONE OF YOU HAVE DONE ANYTHING WITH IT??????

You’ve had the opportunity to write THE crossover fic and haven’t taken it and that’s astounding

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I genuinely think the most annoying thing about joining a fandom is learning how that fandom tags on ao3.

Like. What do you MEAN you don’t use character centric tags.

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nobody is gonna agree but… he is a babygirl