#good luck to anyone who will read this

[messy-jin]

Ikemen Villains x Dreamcatcher

So... This is going to be a long post but after some encouragement, I ended up making a post about the Ikemen Villains' characters, and which songs from the Dreamcatcher's discography I think would fit them best.

Since I'm playing the English version of the game, I didn't included Darius, Ring and Nica since I don't know them much, sorry...

Honestly, if you let me, I'll end up doing that for Ikemen Prince too (Propose is Gilbert's song and you can't change my mind)... Anyways, I hope you enjoy this journey of me rambling about characters and music that I love!

Obviously, let's start with William.

Without hesitation, Black or White is a song that I associate with Will. After all, this is a song about staying true to yourself, and this is what William is all for. "There isn't a right answer" and "A right answer is meaningless" are things I actually imagine him say, with all the times he hits Kate with a "What do you think?" to encourage her to create her own answers to things. The whole "Black or white / I'm neither" in the lyrics... Need I say more? This is his "Is it really bad?" attitude.

Another song that fits him would be Jazz Bar. I don't know... The atmosphere of this song reminds me of him. I think it would be a song he would actually enjoy, even. The mysterious vibe, the flirtuous lyrics (really, go check the lyrics on Genius)... "Endlessly entranced by my humming" is basically him calling Kate out. "If you are going to approach me now / Don't hesitate and come / Let's skip awkward greetings / Like old lovers", come on, guys!

Harrison is next!

For Harry, it was a little trickier than with Will. I went with Demian. Lyrics such as "We know that most of them are trapped accidents / People are corrupt" scream Harrison to me. This song gives me the silent anger vibe going on inside this man. "The evil that grows on its own / Contrarily, between the remaining sincerity" gives a little shout out to his ability to see through lies.

I also could not resist associating him with Boca. The whole idea of counter-attacking and not letting people get away with what they are doing... "They don't have a sense of guilt anymore", yep, shout out to the Three Eagles in his route. I just realized that Harry has the angry songs. Oops, sorry.

Next is my sweetest dearest little meow meow, Liam.

He was tricky too but for another reason (aka I had too many ideas). So... First one I decided to go with is Scream. This song is from the point of view of someone suffering from people's harsh words, comparing it to witch hunts. And the parallels I could make between this and Liam's past, his father and all... Too many. Plus, the shift from "Please, I don't want to scream" and "I just wanna make you scream" is fitting for the shift between Liam's panic and anxiety to Liam having one of his fit. Do you see my vision?

The second I chose is Lullaby. Disappearance is a central theme, in this song. I could not NOT give it to Liam, considering his curse and the fact that acting on stage is a way to make himself disappear to become someone else. "I've waited here every day but I don't know if I can tomorrow as well" or even "I try to hold onto you" reminds me of his relationship with Kate.

Bonus because this one is more Alfons and Liam at the same time : 2 Rings. It is all about looking for thrills. I mean... The very first lyrics of the song are literally "I enjoy the thrills".

Aaah, Elbert... The one who made me start this whole post.

As said in a previous post, BEcause is Elbert's song. It's a song about obsessive love, so obviously it's him. The theme of the ocean is present - his escape place. "Forever mine, everything even your breath, forever mine" is something he told Kate numerous times. "It's okay, even if you reject me / Another voice of mine will call you instead / Just like the way it is now / Would you stay by my side / As a beautiful picture?" I'm telling you, Elbie. Even the other voice is here. The bridge is hauntingly beautiful, which is Elbie's vibe.

Talking about hauntingly beautiful, we also have Shatter. "It captivates me like magic / The splendor and sweetness / I can't close my eyes in the end", ah, yes, here we go again. The "Give me back my freedom" would be Kate if she was not as down for him as she was. Also, on a sadder note, this song is about falling in love with Medusa. And Medusa Tattoos are associated to survivors of SA.

Say hello to the walking problem child, Alfons.

The first song that came up to mind for Alfons was Odd Eye. This song is about illusions, after all. "Ecstatic moment, a perfect illusion / By covering the reality" is basically his curse. "The moment when you're caught off guard by a smile", this song is a warning, I swear. "Everything is a plausible lie / Overshadowed by sweetness", I think that everything is said.

But another song I thought about was Scar. The "Open your eyes (Get up), look around (I can't) / Look at my eyes across the darkness (You're gonna play with me) / Dig deep into me (I can't stop)" sounds like an exchange between Alfons and Kate, with him tempting her, especially the "You're gonna play with me". The themes of memories and oblivion are omnipresent, which are quite linked to Alfons.

So... Roger... I'm sorry, I could not find more than one song, and I'm not even sure I'm satisfied with this one.

I chose OOTD. But hear me out, there are good reasons. First of all, "druken everyday". Now that the joke is done, I can explain more seriously. Roger is a guy who is confident, it has been shown several times in the story. Plus, he does not hide the fact he is rather selfish and does as he pleases - which is the general vibe of this song. "I'm so gorgeous" is fitting for the man who said loud and clear to fear them because they're handsome (Harrison's route).

I hesitated with Poison Love, for the crying part and the "I want you, I want you more" which reminded me of his line "You should try wanting more, because I know I want more" (or something like this) in the Bond Level. But I was not really satisfied either...

This man... So, it's Jude's turn.

I'll go straight to the point : No More has a big Jude's vibe. "Always in packs / You cowardly losers" ? "Don't get in my way, no more" ? "I will never lose, over the pain" ? I don't know what to say more, it just fits. It's his vibe. It's his energy.

Another one that I thought about was Red Sun. "I want to laugh when I see you struggle" is this sadist. The whole "you can't escape me" vibe of this song and the lyrics fits him because, let's be real, once you promised something to him, there is no way he would let you go that easily. "You'll be in danger" and "You'll regret it", this man is always threatening or "warning" Kate.

Ellis, my love, I love you but you scare me sometimes, you're next.

So... Let's start with something sweet with Alldaylong. This song has literally been inspired by a hug. Obviously I'm giving it to Elly. This man is always ready to hug and never misses an occasion to offer one. "Hug my heart", "hand in hand all day long", when this man is all about physical touch. There is also the theme of smiles, which is also something he is all for.

But I was not going to stop at a cute song. Fly High is perfect : an appearingly "happy" song with darker lyrics for an appearingly sweet man with hidden yandere tendencies. "If only I could stop time" makes me think about the whole "preserving people at their happiest moment by offing them". There is also the "Like a thorny rose, I can't escape" which reminds me of his curse - which then shifts to a "You can't escape" during the bridge and "Don't try to get away from me" in the last chorus. The whole "So every night, I can fall asleep next to you forever" also gives Ellis.

Here comes our lovely boss : Victor !

Some Love gives Victor's energy. I mean... This grow-up man is a ball of energy. He is all about loving yourself and your darker side. This song is about embracing yourself and always walking forward. "Never stop, never stop being yourself / No matter what anyone says, don't stop / You'll shine dazzlingly like this" as a bridge is basically him cheering on his darling boys and Kate. There is even the "I'm placing a spell on you now", which is perfect for someone who loves magic tricks.

I also imagine Locked Inside a Door to be fitting for Vic. This song is all about the freedom to be yourself. "Run with me, don't look behind / Bring you back up when you fell / Straighten up your shrunken shoulders" is how a picked up Crown members. "Let me be myself / Gonna take you down / Don't care about everything you say to me", you tell them, sir. "I don't behave / That's who I am" is fitting for a man who said "We are villains, after all".

And last , but definetly not least, our dear beloved Kate !

First one I wanted to mention is Mayday. "In this darkness that grows deeper and shakes me up / I'm going to see you so I can reach you" is really Kate coded. There is the idea of being lost and disoriented throughout the whole song, which reminds me of Kate's situation among Crown. Funny note with the "Oh, where are you now?" because her love interest always go missing in the middle of the route (we'll see with Alfons in the next route if he follows this rule).

And finally, I was also thinking about Breaking Out. "Passing through darkness, the story begins" is our Kate becoming stronger as the story goes on. Her story really begins. There is also the whole going toward tomorrow thing with "Even if someone tries to block right in front of me / I'm already facing tomorrow". And "I throw everything away, even the past" is fitting for her who decided to let go of her past life to stay with Crown. The only difference is that the song talks about seeking the light, while Kate is more seeking darkness.

[stil-lindigo]

the machine.

a comic about being a 'creator' online.

creative notes:

[collectingavenuesmwue]

List of 150+ skk fics

I’m so sorry this is really disorganized 😭 I haven’t read a majority of these so I have no clue which are multi-chapters or one-shots 🙏🙏

GOOD LUCK GUYS‼️

This is how it feels to take a fall - forest_raccoon

Willful neglect - toucheslikethesun

I’ll always come for chuuya - anon

I was screaming your name through the radio - ElectricSplatter

A lesson in thorns - arkastadt 

When i awake - wildflowertea 

Because i’m not me without you - millelav 

For one day - StarshipDancer

A peer behind the mask - karmicMayhem 

Its easy if it’s you - lunarumbra 

Lie lie truth - StarshipDancer

i’ll bleed out for you - Starshipdancer 

Linger - iskendaris 

Six peculiar things about chuuya nakahara according to dazai - BlowingYourMind

Untainted memories - serenathea 

Narrow staircases - rutu14 

Picking a flower that blooms on the heart for you - burgundytshirt 

Home is where the heart is - setosdarkness 

360 degrees - setosdarkness

Dearest hatrack- xxalwayssofia 

This isn’t giving up no this is letting go - Erica45

Do i get my worthless reward yet? - World_Ender22 

Alexithymia - pitouchips  (I have a shrine in my head for this fic it’s so scrumptious)

When Humanity leaves - TheBloodySadist

The harder they fall - the_most_happy (This one is really cute)

Firefly - aetta

Everything had changed, yet the moon was still there -  fifi_writes

Going home - silaswastaken 

Without words - starshipdancer

Hide the truth - writingfromtheshadows

I’ll always come for chuuya - timeisdancing 

All my own - halfbloom (diphylleias)

Around we go (and back again) - zombiemarker

Bite your tongue - soupthatistoohot 

All the holes we had to breathe - airiena 

Deaths offers no absolution - Zairielon 

Like a piece of glass - kagshina 

Over every extinguished past - tucuxi

Silent sorrows/ loud feelings - foundmywei 

STORM - findmywei

Stay - the_most_happy

Clear skies - burgundytshirt

I’ll make a home in your gut because it’s somewhere warm to sleep - arahabakii 

Replaceable- timeisdancing

Run away with me - timeisdancing

I was never meant to last - timeisdancing

Lessons in kissing - timeisdancing 

The void is loud and wants tuna - mistflowerxuan 

The last string to sever - foundmywei

His dark eyes got a little lighter - blowingyourmind (This fic is so cute)

Seeing red - athenaistired

I’ll die in his cold, cold arms - venusdahlia (I LOVE this fic)

Id do it all again (and i will) -noomm9393 

Willful neglect - timeisdancing

Teenage nightmares commit atrocities - forever_wandering

Snow white and the huntsman - paranoid_fridge

One more time with feelings - Root (Fyki)

Doll parts - the_most_happy

If you refuse to listen i’ll say it twice, love of my life - olympiansally 

Sulfur and vinegar - jjmvge 

Rum-flavoured tales - blackoocat  (Ilove this fic it’s so cute)

30 kisses - setosdarkness

Partners - setosdarkness

Wet bandages - starshipdancer

Moving pains - cactusnamedbob

Realizations in a shared hotel room - setosdarkness

Only for you - StormDew2

A game of honesty - starshipdancer

For the rest of the hour - photography_tea

Selfish - Root(fyki)

Sleeping habits - purplesan

All these reckless night - feralrookie(ag_sasami)

So if you go too far i’ll be there - Kimisu

Cuddles for a god - gay._and_dying

You’re drunk (but i guess i’ll stay) - StormDew2

Comforts of the floor - smol_biblophile_firefly

This side of you - soukokuparadise

Come lie with my bones - nolongersorrows 

Slightly more human - bullshitzarry

The fire under his skin - blowingyourmind

The moments in between - hellcatspangledshalalala

Recovery - rutu14

Stab wound - sp1tl0rd

It starts with bloodshed - parasocialism

All that i can give for you - Bitterbutcute

A place like this - roadtosomewhere

Whispers in the dark - castielwho

Lend me your shoulder (i’ve never had someone to lean on) - scripted_suicide

I have died every night waking for you (all alone i have been waiting for you) - scripted_suicide

An attempt at intimacy - unc4nnycrypt1d

Hey look, the sky’s falling apart - saffroncassis (aww this one’s cute)

For the record - zombiemarker

A mouth to empty into - SERIES osamuchuu

Love is not a victory march - osamuchuu

Believe me darling, the stars were made for falling - communist_sasuke

Trust fall - insi

Even the darkness we’re watching is so beautiful - Nastyaex

Stay - neon_toad

Where are you? - doeinsinct

Run away with me - Anon

Stay the night - Shinkirou

Fool for loyalty, or some other word - osamuchuu

Under wraps - coffeebiscuits 

Nothing more important than you - stormdew2

The heat of your orange - etrevil 

Mors Vincit Omnia - themadtree 

The city where the wind blows - Raven_Rein (MY GOD THIS IS BEAUTIFUL)

ANY likeshining fics please they’re great

Dazai in 2010 - HyperNovva

Heartless - arkastadat

Inseparable - milwritescausewhynot

Turning pages - arkastadat

x - strawberry_wlw (skk as math equations this wa so cute)

When I awake - wildflowertea

So if I survive, then I’ll see you tomorrow - prettysicknasty

Can I help you? - Or the hilariously ironic yet accidentally romantic tale of the bookshop cashier who never read and the literature major who couldn’t stop - EuGrace

Brute - moved (liberateas)

Soul - roadtosomewhere

The (latte) art of seduction - prsnlenvy

Harvester of Sorrow - arkastadt

What is being human anyway? - why_cant_turtles_fly (PLEASE READ THIS GUYS PLEASEPLEASE)

Visiting Hours - the_most_happy (this fic BROKE me)

On Pins & Needles - UnicornPopcorn14

ten tons of silence - katering

There You Are (In My Arms) - calmlb

hold my hand, consign me not to darkness - ekkorukki

Cigarette Sunsets - cainwear

The way I love you (and everything in between) - Aspendoesinfactlive

Pristine Pages of Twisted Fate - Milky_latte

The Night That Belonged To No One - SavvyzKoolr

Instinct to Love series - skylorr

Letters From the Heart - WDAMN2 (go ahead and break my heart will you)

Chuuya the Vampire Slayer - Criticalpancake

Project Cauldron series - yugi_amane_is_dead

Breathe the life back into my bones - BlowingYourMind

Magnetic Pull - BlowingYourMind

daffodils are honest - bipretzels

The Sky is What We Leave Behind - CapriStar (OneDer)

[ozwuv]

p3 moment continues

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Hi!! I love this series so much, and as someone who hasn’t really drawn since they were a kid but wants to start as a hobby, do you have any advice for sort of learning to doodle on paper and get better at it? I want to start but I don’t really know how/where

The most important step in getting better at any skill is Persistence and Consistency. Practice and keep practicing! The best way to do that is to keep it fun! Picking a project helps generate ideas (e.g. drawing Pokémon, or characters from a series you like). There are also a ton of monthly prompt lists out there!

I also highly recommend scheduling in a 'drawing/practice' time in your day. For me, I started with 30-60 min before bed (bonus: its a good 'no screentime' activity), and the habit took root there.

There are a lot of 'technical' things to study but find the fun first. At a certain point you will discover you've hit a wall, and have a specific aspect/goal you want to target (colour theory, anatomy, lighting, comic layout). Then it's time to go looking for resources.

Once you have the habit and some goals, go collect some inspiration! Find people who inspire you and study their work!

Another little 'art skill builder' I recommend is the Shrimp Method! Only if you find technical challenges like this fun though (Example of one of my studies below)

[kaiserkisser]

guyssssss personality time :333

YUKIYO TSUMIKI

PERSONALITY:

-always gives, never expects reciprocation

-always has a facade and fake smile on, especially when around unknown people or formal situations

-shows different sides of herself to different people

-has a lot of empathy, cares a lot and tries to hide it

-very adaptable and mostly unfazed by sudden changes and situations

-good at diverting the topic of conversation and very diplomatic (helps in negotiations as she helps the PM get the advantage)

-somewhat withdrawn and extremely socially awkward and is never the one to talk first, so people often underestimate her as they let down their guard, which gives her an edge over them

-tries to be cheerful and motivating for others’ sake although she lacks any motivation herself

-internally majorly self-deprecating, often wants to just disappear from the world, covers it up with her bright personality

-is afraid to let herself care, let anyone else close and be truly happy because of her past

-hides her true feelings as she thinks she’s not worth the effort and time

-the accuracy of her intuition and gut instincts is well known and trusted

-she can see and understood both sides of the coin/argument

-really sensitive and easily affected by people’s words although she tries her best to not show it as she is afraid of weakness

-rarely opens up because she feels her problems are much smaller and much less important that those of other people’s

-if she’s going into a phase, she immediately retreats and shuts herself away and she doesn’t want anyone to have to put up with her and be a burden to anyone

-tries to avoid hurting other people’s feelings if they’re on her side, but enjoys seeing her enemies suffer, as when she hates someone, she can do it intensely

-her protectiveness over her comrades is what makes her one of the mafia’s biggest assets, along with her ability, as she does her best to not allow anyone to die, often putting herself in risk for it

-she’s eternally stressed

-she has a dry/dark type of humour, but in her opinion she can also act overbearing and over-enthusiastic at times and she hates it

-she doesn’t really know her purpose in this world, which doesn’t exactly bother her as much as she wishes it would. It still nags at her often, but she ignores it and rides the wave of life as it comes

-can have mood swings although she does her best to control them, so many don’t know

-she jokes about arson a lot

-she’s kind of squeamish when it comes to medical stuff like open wounds and surgeries (not blood and gore like from fights though) (ik this doesnt make sense but bear with me)

-stays on the tactical, strategic and information collecting sides though rather than open combat, as she prefers to avoid getting physical wherever possible

-this doesnt mean she doesn’t know how to fight though, she has trained under Kouyou and with Chuuya

[finisnihil]

Analysis with Penacony spoilers ahead, read at your own behest

I love Acheron so so much and one of the main reasons is how human she tries to be. She‘s trying so hard to stay human, to be human.

She’s killed people the blood debt is a burden she carries. She only sees the world in black, white, and red, but she gets lost easily and guides strangers home and she thanks you for trusting her even though you don’t have to and she protects a little boy from the mafia and she mourns your friend with you even though she didn’t know her because she knows you’re hurting and she helps you calm down after you watched your friend die horribly and she stays with you and looks after you and tells you to stay level headed and she apologies for being held back from protecting those you love because she isn’t human anymore and then she does one of the most human thing of all and blesses the soul and mourns her with you, guides her home like she did with you. Acheron is gentle like a psychopomp, like Death. She cries blood but it’s still crying.

Onto the allusion, the name Acheron comes from the river Acheron, one of the five rivers of the Underworld in Greek mythology. The Acheron is the River of Woe/Pain/Lost Souls. The River Cocytus (River of Wailing/Lamentation) and River Phlegethon (River of Magma) both flow into the River Acheron and the River Styx (River of Oaths/Border to the Underworld/Makes one invulnerable if they bathe in it) stems from the Acheron. The final river is the River Lethe which causes forgetfulness when bathed in or drunk from and usually used by the souls of the dead to be reborn. These allusions fit Acheron well, as she cries blood which is fitting for one named after the River of Woe. Her difficulty to hold onto memories is also reminiscent of the Lethe, especially now that we know she’s an Emanator. She was technically “reborn” as when she became one.

Building off this, she fulfills the role of a psychopomp. In folklore and mythology psychopomp are entities that guide souls of the dead, such a Thanatos in Greek mythology who is the personification of peaceful death (Who Seele has allusions to but that’s another analysis). Aventurine associates Acheron with the Finality a few times and we see her act like a psychopomp when she does things like “take us home” when we first meet her and she mentions guiding again when she sends Firefly off. She gets lost in the waking world but never seems to in the Dreamscape.

Building even more off this allusion, in Greek mythology the twin brother of Thanatos is Hypnos, the personification of sleep. Sleep and death are often tied together even outside of Greek mythology, like the Epic of Gilgamesh where Gilgamesh is literally told he can’t think about conquering death when he can’t even conquer sleep.

This all leads me to a theory about why Acheron said she had no choice in whether to draw her blade. She wanted to but she had no choice in the matter. We’ve seen her draw her blade twice so far in the story and it was to wake the Trailblazer and to fight Sam. If Acheron is an agent of the Finality maybe her blade can’t be drawn because it can only be used against those dying or dead or not living? We know Firefly was dying and we know she has a weird connection with Sam. The weird “Death” monster also seemed to target Firefly. I think Acheron couldn’t draw her sword against the “Death” because she is also an agent of Death and cannot attack one of her own, but she can use it against Firefly because Firefly is dying and it would be seen as a final severing of the soul from life or as “harvesting” the soul. Of course I could be completely and utterly wrong I’m literally just making an analysis based on allusions and motifs but still I think it’s interesting. Plus Aventurine calls Acheron and Sam enemies and Sam uses fire, an element typically seen as representing life.

Pulling a little bit away, Acheron sees the world in black, white, and red. The red is fleeting according to her and it reappears when a choice is made. If Acheron is a psychopomp this makes sense, she would mostly see the world as the living and the dead and the red could be a tie to the idea of the red string of fate, as we know destiny is a major theme of HSR’s story. When we make choices that change the direction of fate, we interact with the red strings of fate. This could be another reason she’s at odds with the Stellaron Hunters, they adhere strongly to the idea of destiny but to death destiny would have a different meaning. Her sword has an eye and is adorned with red which is where the majority of the color in her design is centered, going back to my theory around her sword it could represent how it cuts strings of fate and the eye matches the one on the “Death” nightmare.

We also know she apparently hijacked the Ever-Flame Mansion party to come here, maybe because she sensed there would be a lot of death here and came to collect the souls?

Finally, I would like to reiterate I do not play HI3 this is just something I’ve noticed, so correct me if I’m wrong:

She seems to be a Raiden Mei Expy and I know nothing of that character but I did notice when she says “Do you remember me?” there’s the answer of no and yes, and she akins us to a dear friend she had. We, the protagonist, fulfill the same role in this game Kiana (I think that’s the HI3 protag) does in HI3 and I’m vaguely aware Raiden Mei and Kiana have some sort of relationship in HI3. This asking if we remember her could be two things to me: Either she’s asking if we remember her as we have faced death before or she’s asking if we the player remember her from HI3, which she may have an awareness of if she is a personification of death and that may link her to knowledge of the Imaginary Tree as trees seem to be associated with death in HSR when you remember Yaoshi is associated with trees as well and the fruit of their tree on the Xianzhou gives immortality, where if Luocha is an Emanator he would have that tree motif too and we know he has tree motifs because he’s an Expy of Otto who did interact with what I think was the Imaginary Tree and that carried over when Luocha was given the element of Imaginary (Of course I had to talk about Luocha who do you think I am)

Anyways there’s so so much more but this post is already really really long and probably incomprehensible so if I think of any more I’ll make like a part II post anyways thanks for reading this far if you did and feel free to add discussion, mwah!

[kokoa-la]

Do yall know how many powers Danny acc has in the show

Cus I looked at the page from the Fandom, and I counted like 52 (including some I didn't believe in or had other explanations)

Let me list them here

1. Intangibility

2. Invisibility

3. Flight

4. Cryokinesis (ice)

5. Ghostly wail

6. Overshadowing

7. Ghost rays

8. Ghost sense

9. Healing

10. Reconstruction

11 - 18. Super strength, speed, durability, agility, balance, endurance, stamina, reflexes

19. Fuse two halves together - fuse with other ghosts

20. Gravity Manipulation (only on himself)

21. Back slide

22. Space travel

23. Repulsion Field

24. Energy strike

25. Ghost shield

26. Energy constructs

27. Power absorption

28. Energy absorption

29. Electrokinesis (electricity)

30. Power augmentation

31. Ghost stinger

32. Thermokinesis (temperature) [I was 50/50 on it- don't rly count it but I'll put it here]

33. Photokinesis (light)

34. Telekinesis

35. Restoration (only inanimate)

36. Technopathy - potential (dan used it)

37. Exorcism

38. Dream Invasion

39. Fusion

40. Pyrokinesis (fire) [he makes ectoplasmic fire at one point don't question it - I didn't]

41. Duplication

42. Spectral Body Manipulation (can make himself swiss cheese)

43. Plasticity

44. Size alteration

45. The void (not a Canon power- Butch Hartman headcanoned it for dp - thank u @madametamma )

46. Paranormal immunity

47. Vacuum resistant

48. Aural shock

Now some are very similar and for a lot of the kinesis (kinesi?) Only had like one small instance so they're a possible power (like making stuff melt or using ectofire- and that's not even counting the one time he had weather powers albeit temporarily)

Oh, and yes, I did count each super human ability as its own (strength, speed, endurance, etc.). My logic was if a superhero had a singular one of those and it was counted as a power (super strength, most common example), then it should be counted as separate ones for danny, too.

Anyways, the fanfic writers should go insane with this list.

It's insane.

Here's the link for it

[brainlessbaguette]

Y'all I am so scared. This could either be great or an absolute dumpster fire of a movie. Why live-action? No seriously why live-action??? For Zelda, the games that are so wonderfully cartooney even at their most serious? Why is Avi Arad producing a Zelda movie? His mixed bag of movies aside I DON'T THINK HES DONE FANTASY??? Like correct me if I'm wrong but I believe its mostly sci-fi, superheroes and stuff.

I know I'll enjoy it regardless, trashy movies are my jam. But if we want more it can't flop like 1993 mario(love that movie) and thats the bit thats got me nervous.

I'm gonna anxiously hold out hope solely becuase the tweet opened up with "This is Miyamoto." Just DON'T do BOTW/TOTK. I know you want to pick the cash cow Nintendo, but video game movies are WAY more likely to flop if you pick the one where everyone would rather just play the game. The bigger the fanbase the worse the odds get, so I am begging you not to come out of the gates with an adaptation of the ones where everyone and their mother has played it.

[amereslare]

Twitter Request Fill 07: Crowley and Aziraphale teach Muriel how to blend in with humans

[walmart-miku]

I have decided to reread orv to celebrate the new of an anime adaptation. So now I'm going to be live blogging it. Apologies to all followers and mutuals in advance. I will not be Normal about orv for the foreseeable future. Anyways

Me when I'm almost done reading a book/fic

gay

Yoo Sangah I love you but you're saying "please money" :/ what you're tying to say honey is "por favor dame dinero" (<-this person has taken 3 years of Spanish and is currently in their 4th year of Spanish classes)

ORV chapters: Prologue and Chapter 1

[rileylastname]

extreme sensitivity and difficulty adapting to change is one of the most challenging parts of being autistic (to me, i am only speaking my for myself here, every single autistic person is different). small changes, even positive changes are liable to cause a meltdown. the world is such a scary place when you know that things changing, as all things do, could send you into a spiral. and it’s so difficult to explain to allistics why we’re reacting the way that we do, especially when you know it seems like an overreaction... but this is how i describe it:

you know that feeling when you got a haircut that you hated and were doing everything you could to hold back the tears? that “oh no oh no oh no” moment when you look in the mirror and realize you hate how it looks, and now there’s a sob bubbling up in your throat and you’re trying so hard to choke it back down so that you don’t cry in public but the more you look the harder it feels to bottle it all in?

i feel and often react that way to everyday situations and changes. i cut my nails a little bit shorter than I’m used to? meltdown. or we got a new toaster to replace the old one? meltdown. or my phone updated and everything is different? meltdown and now i can’t stop crying! (these are all real examples of real things from my real life that caused me to have real meltdowns btw.) and in the midst of my stress i can’t help but berate myself for losing it over something like that, and of course shame and self-loathing only exacerbate the meltdown.

i am constantly trying to work through my internalized ableism about this. I spent years being called dramatic and immature, confused about why i was unable to grapple with things my peers found entirely inconsequential. i wish that i didn’t feel guilty or embarrassed about the way that i naturally react to stressful situations (especially situations that are probably not nearly all that stressful to allistics) because I know that if I could hate myself into becoming someone I liked better, it would have worked by now.

[query-quadrant]

I've had a pitch crush on someone for a while! I really hate them! >:)

But one of our hatefriends just told me they might be pale for me? >:O

If they are, what do I do??? How do I make them hate me properly? :(

I don't pity them! I don't even know why they pity me! Or if they even really do! :?

It's really confusing and I don't want to have to reject them and then have to try and ask them out! That's not gonna go well!!! >:(

yeah i dont know that sounds awful i think personally id just die

questionable advice: either try upping the annoyingness and going all out with pitch flirting or just sit them down and just actually ask them if they pity you or not maybe youll get lucky and they dont but either way at least youll know right so that sucks a little less than not knowing

bad advice: kill their lusus maybe thatll make them really mad at you

[applestorms]

doom, aspect complements, & oppressing social systems

some kinda half-baked (literal) shower thoughts on aspect complements, particularly life & doom, with, surprisingly, not too much on the captors but a decent section on jane. this is long as fuck, shit.

TL;DR: aspect complements are nice in how they expand the meaning of each individual aspect, doom & life in particular are cool in how they have such overarching influence over the lives of characters and should really get more attention analysis-wise, ft. my own musings about how the alpha kids' lives are seeped in doom, in large part because of madame HIC herself. written in one sitting because i guess i'm insane.

the one thing i really, really like about the canon established by the extended zodiac is the way it splits aspects into complementary pairs. to me, one of the major appeals/frustrations of homestuck's classpect & lunar sway system is how vague and yet distinct the categories are, how blurry the borders are but how distinct of an Feel you can get almost instantly upon even just hearing the names of each aspect. e.g. i can say that [x] character from an entirely separate piece of media is a prince of doom, and even if you don't know jack shit about homestuck classpects on some level you can still get that, understand the implications that has on the character-- what "prince" means for how they treat others or the expectations they have for themself, the specific emotional connotations of what a person presiding over "doom" might be associated with. they play into long-established cultural categories, basically, remixed Jungian archetypes as some people might (and have) put it. still, i think homestuck has a pretty interesting way of interpreting these categories, which is part of why classpects can be so appealing.

homestuck aspects hold a lot of implicit associations that you can learn & guess at over the course of reading the comic, so setting up these complementary pairs works really well in my mind since it only strengthens the associations. take light & void, for example: light is associated thematically with knowledge, luck, and being in the spotlight. typically (at least in my own american context), the opposite of light is designated as dark-- but homestuck instead makes light's complement void, the aspect associated with nothingness, secrets, people & characters forgotten or left behind, waiting. following the logic of this video, void isn't even associated w/ the color black (typically associated w/ darkness) but rather the color white, pure emptiness, something that can't really be known, 道可道，非常道。名可名，非常名。"The Dao that can be trodden is not the enduring and unchanging Dao. The name that can be named is not the enduring and unchanging name," (Daodejing, Legge translation) or, alternatively, "A Way that can be followed is not a constant Way. A name that can be named is not a constant name," (Ivanhoe translation) and so on and so forth. light in homestuck thus isn't just knowledge about the world, it is the world. it is, period. understanding the world, being a major player within that world is equivocated with being itself though this pairing-- and, in turn, a lack of understanding is associated w/ a lack of (meaningful? seen?) existence itself.

anyways, there are interesting things you could said about all these pairings (thinking about blood & breath and hope & rage in particular), but the one i really wanna focus on right now is one set that i think often goes overlooked, which sucks because i think both aspects carry a lot more weight in homestuck than people tend to give it credit for: life & doom.

life is the side to this i have less strong feelings/thoughts about, so let's maybe start with that. we have a handful of pretty relevant life players in comic so this is perhaps the clearer side of the dichotomy: while feferi doesn't get a ton of focus after her original introduction in hivebent (and especially after murderstuck, rip), jane, meenah, and the condesce are all pretty major characters so we have a decent amount to work with for analysis. i particularly like the classpect-navalgazing summary of life as an, "aspect of affluence," life players being people that grow up with a lot materially but in turn have a lot to figure out about the emotional/empathy stuff, who benefit from a kind of "dubious privilege," that makes their homelife cushy and gives them a hefty inheritance to fall back on, but makes all the social shit more confusing.

it's that struggle against the status quo that they simultaneously benefit from that really stands out to me here, especially because the main life player that i want to talk about is the condesce-- not just meenah, but )(er Imperious Condescension herself. so, to get into that...

homestuck really functions under a systems brain, which is obvious from the start w/ all the computer science jokes (that i definitely 100% understand) but easily expands past that as the series goes on. if you've gotten this far into reading this essay, you know what i'm talking about. what's been more relevant in my mind recently, though, is not just the ways in which homestuck itself is built up through these systems, but the way it both thematically & literally portrays social systems as well, as a general concept/working force in the universe even outside of more specific social systems like racism/sexism/ableism/etc.

from all the reading/watching i've done looking at peoples' various classpecting analysis (long way of saying i forget exactly where this comes from), i've come to view rage & doom as two sides of the same coin, or more accurately, two reactions to the same perceptions: both doom & rage are acutely aware of just how much the world & greater forces around them are fucking them over, it's just that doom reacts by giving in to the Inevitability of it all, trying to work within the restraints of the system surrounding them, while rage reacts by giving a giant fuck you and trying to tear it all down.

tying this back to life, the dichotomy of life & doom as complementary again has some interesting implications, specifically in how life players benefit from the status quo while doom players suffer so heavily under the weight of it. keep in mind: just like meenah, the condesce is a thief, the only real difference being that the condesce's power extends over a much grander scale of space & time. when the condesce kills off humanity, stealing life from the planet & replacing it w/ her own faux/more desirable replicas, she is in the process dooming humanity & the planet itself (parallel to roxy: steal void, create being, steal life, create nihilistic inevitability). as one of the major villains in homestuck, really second only to lord english, the condesce is thus not just an individual person but something like a system of power itself. as dirk says to jake on (A6A3:4864)

TT: Though the Baroness made very few substantive gestures of aggression, the global fear of her looming threat would trigger all the changes she needed. TT: Governments prepared for war, as if to defend against the invading alien armies she undoubtedly commanded. TT: But of course, she had no army. She was always the only one of her kind. TT: Instead, the world powers were only setting about to build her armies for her.

thus HIC, as the most powerful iteration of meenah that we see in comic, both benefits from the status quo as it is already established and has enough power to evolve/expand upon it herself, to the point where you can really see her as the figurehead/leading innovator for oppression, both on alternia and earth in the B2 timeline.

it's because of this that i think doom has a lot more influence over the plot/world of homestuck than people give it credit for. to give a more distinct example of this, while the alpha kids' game is called a void session, i don't think it's too far off base to note the ways in which doom hangs over it as well. looking specifically at some (alpha) kids:

DIRK is probably the least directly connected alpha kid to doom, being associated more w/ void through homestuck's systems brain & his various connections to equius (& nepeta), as well as the heart/mind pairing (and jake's hope influence sneaking into everything tbh w/ BGD). still, i think it's pretty obvious to anyone that's like. read through dirk's self-hating bullshit that he has a lot of doom-related thoughts, which can in part be attributed to HIC's influence on his apocalypse world, but also, and more notably in my mind, dave's lasting legacy on him.

alongside the typical patron troll pairings of john/vriska, rose/kanaya, dave/terezi, and jade/karkat for the beta kids, we also have the (less overt/clear) pairings of which troll resembles each kid the most: namely, karkat being the "john" of the trolls, leader-ship/social position-wise, jade being associated with both nepeta & feferi, and rose... being like kanaya, vriska, and terezi, i guess?? it's less clear for the girls i suppose, and perhaps not a super strong connection in general as the trolls are pretty distinctly themselves separate from the human kids, but the important detail here is the connection between sollux & dave, as the (not at all) "cool kids" and primary besties to the main leader of their respective group. visually, they can also be loosely associated through their trademark glasses, sollux's red and blue lenses being connected to the A & B universes of the trolls & humans respectively and dave's stiller shades being connected to paradox space & the greater universe of homestuck (and problem sleuth) as a whole after passing through a black hole.

dave's biggest connection to doom however is in his connection to doomed timelines and the dead daves all of his timeline-hopping shenanigans lead to. he kind of ends up constantly skirting around the edges of doom, in a way, utilizing terezi's seer of mind help to just barely avoid his own inevitable doom. you could almost define time itself as an aspect along those terms, actually, with the stress time players are constantly under coming from the impending doom hanging over their heads that they're always just barely avoiding, like a satellite constantly falling and missing the planet as gravity pulls it along into orbit. sick imagery regardless.

sidenote: perhaps i've been staring at this dumb aspect circle for too long, but it seems notable enough to mention that doom & time connect in a line that is directly parallel to life & space's connection. ALSO, just now remembering that i wrote an entire essay on space & time and those aspects' connection to life & death (the concepts, not just the aspects) way back in like, february, that i almost entirely forgot about until literally just now. guess i'll try editing that later?? (edit: i'm a doofus. i talked about the space/time stuff mostly in my kant essay. still gonna post something about death in homestuck later, though.) carrying on.

anyways, even looking past beta dave's connection to sollux, alpha dave is a character so seeped in tragedy that i don't think i even need to say all that much to make this connection clearer. his entire life as dirk dictates it is essentially just one big fight against an inevitable end, not only for himself but the entire rest of humanity as well, and the underlying implications that even if he had lived to old age he never would've been able to meet or raise dirk only hammers this in even harder. alpha dave was doomed from the start, not just from the moment HIC landed on earth but the moment skaia took his and dirk's baby meteors and damned them to separation.

JAKE's connection to doom is similarly primarily through sollux, though it's both more direct and less obvious than dirk's. putting his connections to jade and my space/life thoughts aside for another essay, jake's main link to doom is through erisolsprite-- fittingly, in the biggest catastrophe of a doomed timeline, in game over.

the mention of erisol in general actually brings up another weird, not-quite complementary connection between doom & hope, which is another line of connection in the rectangle that is hope/rage/life/doom-- notably, i believe optimistic duelist referred to these as the mutable aspects, the most abstract of the twelve. to bring back my point from earlier, i would also say that these are the aspects with the most far-reaching, powerful influence over homestuck, whether that be in-story in the world, through the systems of power and oppression that characters live under (in the case of doom & life), or on a meta level on the story itself, particularly when it comes to what is or isn't allowed to happen/plot contrivances & coherency, etc. (in the case of rage & hope).

sollux & eridan's dynamic in A5 really establishes doom & hope as two opposing viewpoints, complacency & utter surrender in the face of a horrible fate you can never escape versus faith & imagination to the point of fucking lunacy & calling a magic wand a "science stick". in erisolsprite, it's really the doom that comes through the strongest, perhaps in contrast against jake's own pitiful attempts to hope himself through the in-game social awkwardness he wants to pretend doesn't exist. in parallel to fefetasprite's complete silence (but simultaneously, implied perfect support & friendship), erisolsprite is an asshole that can't stand anyone and especially not himself and has completely given up on any remaining semblance of hope-- kind of a thematically nice conclusion, actually, finding the middle ground of sollux's doom & eridan's princely destruction of hope after all their conflicts from earlier in the story. or it could be, if it weren't so fucking miserable to look at. point is, i think jake's hopelessness (or perhaps more accurately, his inability to access hope) later in the story becomes quite synonymous with doom, similar to dirk in how neither of them can see much of a future.

ROXY is actually probably the least doom-ridden of the entire group, which i suspect may come from the fact that she is herself a void player and thus is more at home in the context of a void session, even if all her friends are being shitheads the entire time. really, the points where roxy is the most bitter & doom-ridden occurs before they even enter the game, when she is still under the strongest influence of the condesce, like how roxy continually pushes back on even starting the game at all just as a fuck you to HIC.

fittingly, i think it's actually the absence of doom that makes roxy such a strong & great friend once she gets her shit together in-session. she kind of has an opposite arc to the rest of the alpha kids, starting off completely doom-ridden thinking that she's never going to meet her mom or her friends and constantly paranoid that HIC is going to fuck everything up, only to re-evaluate once she's physically with her buds and have more faith in the future. a good example of how life & doom are connected to social systems (or not just any specific system of bigotry, but moreso the general feeling of having greater powers outside your control that have a major influence on your life) maybe-- roxy must extricate herself as entirely as possible from the status quo, from world-wide and/or world-influencing figures' expectations, before she can start focusing on and figuring out what really matters to her and pursue those goals, e.g. getting sober.

and of course, our beloved life player, JANE. as a life player, jane's connections to doom are a lot more obvious than the previous three, but i think that only strengthens this idea of doom residing over the alpha kids' session (and homestuck as a whole, really). where you have to look more to the generally miserable, nihilistic sentiments of the other kids to see the influence of doom, jane is literally and regularly brainwashed to the values & ideals of HIC. note some of the specific orders that her tiaratop gives her (A6A1:4153):

You put on your highly fashionable UNREAL HEIRESS THOUGHTWAVE TIARATOP and flip it on. It immediately hums to life as its blazing fast processes mingle with your thoughts. It is the most efficient computing technology in the world by far, as long as you don't wear it for too long. But aside from a few migraines, you can't possibly imagine any OBEY drawbacks that CEASE REPRODUCTION could come with SUBMIT merging CONSUME your thoughts with EMBRACE YOUR CULLING experimental technology CONFORM TO SOCIAL ORDER from an STAY ASLEEP extremely powerful DIE corporation, wait what?

or, one by one, categorized loosely:

OBEY, SUBMIT, CONFORM TO SOCIAL ORDER, STAY ASLEEP: obvious implications, again ties to the idea of doom & life dictating overarching social systems/order. the last one is notable in that it also ties jane to jade's narcolepsy, which fits the whole crockertier/grimbark arc that happens later on when those two meet.

CEASE REPRODUCTION: perhaps more HIC specific, in that she hates human reproduction. i think i might address this more in that time/space essay, if i ever get around to editing/finishing that.

EMBRACE YOUR CULLING, DIE: the "DIE" part of this is pretty on the nose w/ HIC's stealing of life aka eradication of humanity, but the "EMBRACE" part of the culling one really solidifies a connection to doom.

what stands out to me is that it is unclear how much of these subliminal teachings jane is meant to internalize & apply to herself personally versus spread & share & execute in her job as an heiress & tool to HIC. it's clear from the way that jane talks to jake in the jail cell that even while in full-crockertier mode she at least in part goes against some of these teachings, telling jake on (A6A6I1:6443):

JANE: You do remember our recent agreement to have "a zillion babies," don't you, Jake? I do hope you were not planning to renege on this vow. JAKE: *Sob sob sob...* JANE: Our children will rule the empire when we are gone, which of course will be never, because we will be eternally young and beautiful and immortal and in love, for ever and ever.

clearly conflicting with the whole "CEASE REPRODUCTION" thing, though she does admittedly treat him with quite a bit of disgust at the same time that she's telling him he's doomed to be a baby making machine or whatever.

point is, as a life player, and especially as a life player under the direct influence & control of HIC, jane is in that conflicting & confusing position talked about earlier, where she simultaneously benefits from privilege & has extensive control in deciding which standards she wants to, as well as extends those expectations onto the people around her (e.g. for a more minor example, think of how she dictates the grammar of her friends when speaking to them online), but is also stuck in a position where she deals with some of the most significant negative side-effects of such standards.

jane's gender fuckery really sums this up best: she both loves & idolizes gumshoes and the traditionally masculine aesthetics and attitudes that come w/ them, but is also in one of the most obsessively feminine, stay-at-home, stuck-in-the-kitchen 1950s housewife archetypes ever. she's a girlboss heiress to a capitalist, corporate empire, a job that is itself very traditionally masculine in the inherent power it holds, but resides over one of the most traditionally feminine spheres it possibly could. jane is made of life, she was born into and built out of the status quo & social standards of the world she landed on and reaps all the benefits & consequences of such, trapped in a system that protected her, in her house by a father that loves her, and constantly keeps trying to break out even if she doesn't even understand the full magnitude of what she's doing or wants. crockertier jane is really just the epitome of this-- a form that dooms her just as much as it benefits her, wealth that cushions her ass and means absolutely nothing, a title that she cannot be extricated from, for better and for worse.

[never-not-ever]

Night before/Admission Day

Of course we're not starting things out on a good note. It was mild, nothing compared to a month ago and how bad it could be but I didn't go to the ER. Honestly I was so done with everything and I think I had a mentality of "if they want to send me out the minute I get to the CEC then fine".

Trying to think of the night before it gets fuzzy which is weird cause I don't think I drank with the ativan. Maybe I did? I have this memory of going back and forth sipping cream soda and hard cider. But I can't remember if it was that night or another night. I remember taking 2 pills with celsius and I think I made a post about it on here if the two cancel out? But I can't remember taking the other 2/last 2 pills I had left.

Honestly it would explain the void in my memory. Like I didn't go to sleep, didn't even try to sleep that night yet I can't remember the hours up until I showered around 8:30? I actually think I was running late and was afraid I'd be late to my 10am admission, but like what would it have mattered if I was lol. I have a time stamp of the scale at 9:14am. Which speaking of that horrible thing... Ugh last year when I went inpatient it I was 36lbs lighter!! Jesus christ. I'm only up 15lbs since the day I discharged back in August. Which means I gained 20lbs during my entire admission. But my weight was constantly going up and down. I remember back in January I weighed less. I never did the weigh ins on Sunday the entire time I was here. Except occasionally but I made it a "blind weight for them" and weighed myself like in the corner so they couldn't see the number.

Okay moving off the topic of weight which has nothing to do with this post....

The night before I came here I kept procrastinating cleaning and laundry and packing and even when I had all my clothes and luggage in the kitchen on the table and counters I was still putting it off and getting distracted with other things. I think I ended up doing a last minute rush job with vacuuming in my living room. I kind of sort of remember showering and getting ready in the bathroom but the hours before that.. nothing.

I do remember on the drive here I was so tired and we were at a red light and I dozed off and my Nana got so worried.

I was afraid I was bringing too much. Looking at that picture I know the suitcase had clothes, that blue tied handle bag was food and snacks and my tumbler but that black floral bag... I don't even remember what I put in it.

When I got to the Clinical Evaluation Center they take everything (obviously) including my phone. I couldn't even keep a book which was strange but I just ended up sleeping or trying to.

They did my covid test which hurt like a bitch. Funny how some people aren't as invasive and others it feels like torture. Then she gave me a mask (absolute idiot) until my test came back.

I don't even remember the actual intake sessions just that the first one was with an MHS and the second was with a nurse. During all the waiting I hung out in the tv/lounge room and the chairs reclined which was nice. I got a blanket and pillow and tried to nap. I think I snacked on like a banana and pieces of a very dry blueberry muffin. Then I met with a doctor and talking about meds was fuzzy cause I told her how I stopped them and wasn't really taking them but then said how I'd take my prn and sleeping med occasionally.

I think I finally got up to the unit a little before 2pm because I remember the announcement for the 2pm fresh air walk. I saw some familiar faces especially when I had to wait in the hallway while my room was being cleaned. I saw the two girls (ones actually a few years younger than me and one is like in her 50s lol) saying "girls" sounded weird and like I needed to clarify.

The charge nurse who I always thought didn't like me did my intake and she was super nice and kept saying "hun/honey". She says that to everyone but it made me feel nice. It was very quick, she said something like "do you want me to go over everything or...." and I asked if there were any new rules and she said no and so that was that. She looked at the cuts and scratches on my chest from earlier that morning. I do know that I was honest and mentioned it downstairs in the CEC during my intake but they didn't ask to look at it. Maybe they thought it was the same as my (uncovered) chest and not that bad. But the nurse on the unit put a med consult in to make sure it wasn't infected, it's not, it never is.

I finally got to my room and ironically its one of the ones I was in the last time I was here. Unfortunately it's on the side where you can see in when the door is open. I was on this side for a few weeks in October last year and then I was switched to a single in November while on the 1:1 and after that I was switched back into this room but was on the other side luckily. I was in this room for I think 2 months, the majority with my friend who's still here. It was this room that had mold in it. Right near my bed lmao, and we had to move out.

Anways back to yesterdays boring chain of events. Once I got to my room I immediately tried to take a nap. By this point it was like 2:30ish cause I remember briefly seeing the checks person start her hour. She was one of my favs last time. I tried to sleep but it was so uncomfortable with these hospital pillows and the blanket and pillow I brought had to go through the dryer for 30 mins and I guess it was a busy time in the laundry room. I was trying to avoid having to leave my room but I ended up going to the nurses station to ask for my pillow/double check the stupid rule of it needing to go in the dryer...

I forget what time it was but when one of the cousnelors started her rounds on checks and was all nice and "hey Deb, do you need anything" I asked if she could check on when they'd be able to go through my belongings. Then a little bit later, I honestly don't think it was that much later but two counselors came in with all my stuff and started going through it. I liked those two so it was nice to see them again. We chatted a little while they went through things and then one of them who was strict/good at her job asked in the end "is there anything I missed that's going to pop up later?" and I smirked and was like "is that a trick question" and she was like "just trying to cover my bases". But I didn't sneak anything in from home. I almost said to them "the only thing I was tempted to sneak in was a really nice pen" but honestly that might not have been well received. But it's true. I'm not trying to start things off on the wrong foot especially since this is a voluntary admission and I reached out for help. Like how fucked up would it be if I snuck in stuff to hurt myself with right off the bat. Granted I did that throughout my admission last time when I went out on passes so I know they have their guards up and might even think I still managed to get something in. I don't blame them.

Once I got my clothes and stuff I folded and put everything away. My nurse for the evening came in during my belongings and introduced herself to me. She's new to the unit. I think she came right after I left but I already like her.

We had a check in and I asked her to rebandage my arm because the charge nurse who covered it tbh did a horrible job 😅 and it was way too big and covering newer scars that have been so itchy and irritated lately.

After that I went back to my room and don't really remember the order of the rest of the night but I know I saw those two girls playing cards and got introduced to some lady and younger guy. Then my roommate walked in and they all seemed nice. It became apparant that I knew the two girls from a previous admission and then my roommate was like "oh youve been here before, so you're all set..." sort of trailing off a question of thinking she'd tell me about the unit/show me around lol. She's a little older than me and super sweet. I was talking to one of the girls how it's weird being in our old room and the younger guy chimed in and said something and then was like "oh you guys know each other" and I was like "yeaaa me, blank and blank go way back" and me and the younger girl laughed.

I made some ramen since I already know the food here is shitty. I mean it's not always crap but it's not the best. Last time I resorted to just eating my own food like microwable stuff and snacks.

I think it was around 9 when the older girl texted asking if I was heading to bed or up to chat and so we hung out for a little while catching up and it was nice.

Then I made some english muffins, watched a little Will & Grace and then headed to my room at 11 when they close the common areas.

I "got ready for bed" which I'm going to try to do more while I'm here, like washing my face and brushing my teeth. I was worried spending so much time in the bathroom they'd think I was up to something but it was change of shift and honestly I don't even care.

When I came out I saw this girl who always works overnights and she's the best. It was just a quick hello in passing but it was nice to see her.

I was going to stay up late but I was exhausted and fell asleep before midnight and shockingly without any meds. But it makes sense since I didn't sleep the night before. I also didn't know if my trazodone was even in the system just cause of the weird interaction with the doctor in admissions "I'll put x, y and z in for now and you can talk to your doctor on the unit about the other stuff" and I forgot what the "x, y and z" were lol.

That was pretty much it. As if that wasn’t just 10 thousand paragraphs 🙄

[northern-passage]

hello! read the wlw vampire story you recommended and I loved it and was then surprised to see it was written by the author of The Hacienda, which I didn't enjoy. I was wondering if you read it? It has been pretty popular on booktube!

no i haven't! i actually had never heard of her at all, which did surprise me when i looked her up and saw she had published a book. and i very much did get the vibe that it was the kind of book that would be popular on booktube (not in a negative way like. it's just a Vibe, you can tell) so i was surprised that i had never heard of her because i do love booktube reviews lol

when i found that story i was just in the Mood for vampires (it's what i've been writing for like the last month now) and had literally just searched vampires on that website and was reading a bunch of the short stories, and that one just happened to be the best one, imo. and then i briefly looked her up before recommending it just because i like to do a vibe check before i recommend someone, hahaha