#good gosh what a fun time.
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im just going to go off in the tags for my review but last nights concert was crazy, entertaining, and crazily entertaining. while they did not play the rhythm thief clearly my rhythm, if i ever had any, was stolen and ron and russell were easily able to see my lack of clapping and dancing skills. when will those 70+ year old men stop beating me at everything
#you would think clapping on the beat is easy. not when youre on a level of excitement you havent been since you were a kid#in all seriousness my sarcastic tone is covering the fact that i really did enjoy it all so much. now on to the analysis#we'll get right to the heart of the matter: russell was sweating three songs in and well. there are many benefits to being in the front row#im really really sorry. but. good god i may have been looking at his neck a lot of the time#also it may have been during the first song but i feel like it was during another one where he jumped (beaver o'lindy?)#and my eyebrow raise and look of 👁️👄👁️ when his shirt rode up was very palpable. i was very close .#i think russ looked at me a couple times near the start but it was more of a dfjfljkda dont look at me im staring at u like 😍 moment for me#im just so self conscious it hurts! but i was smiling my head off the entire time while also not knowing how to stand#the front row was standing the entire time it was wild#also i think the moment i predicted did happen of ron giving me a look like 🤨 for knowing all the lyrics to one of their more obscure songs#but i could be wrong.#russell was bouncing off the walls as usual but good god to see it in person. and he sounded incredible!!!!#i also could not resist bouncing a few times. its contagious. plus you gotta do it during music that you can dance to#good gosh what a fun time.#at the end of the concert someone was like 'i could see you looking with such love' like yes very true. good to know it was obvious#can i just say again russell was sooo. its a different thing altogether seeing him like 6 feet away in the Real World#did i mention how sweaty he was. ok review almost over#still no eaten by the monster of love but hard to complain with such a great show#spars#sparks tour 2023 spoilers
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"That is where you are wrong, my boy!"
@ratb4stard3 and I deliver another Cowardlyghostbro's(™) collab ✨💛
#Cinderellas castle#The brother of all time did Sir hop and the background 💛💛💛💛#Obsessed with the little froggy scales on Jon btw oh ymgod and just how great he and sir hop look in general i am UNWELL#also just...theeeee background!!!! uhggng!!!!#i can't get over it - its so good#the vibe is jUST RIGHT uhgughughguhuhg loooook at it oh ymgofdddloooooookiminufd#This ones going up in the CGB clubhouse's Hall Of Fame#adjsgkfs gosh I've been wanting to do Fanart for cinderella's castle for a long time but i was struggling really badly with it#But then i was sent the Cursed “Let's collaborate” business card by my favorite ghost and all was well#no you wont get any more context on that#Love doing art with the brother tbh - he makes it feel less like a chore when art is feeling difficult and it becomes a lot more fun 🙏#even tho i take forever with my part#he says its fine but don't listen to him he's crazy 😔😔👎#starkid#Cinderella's castle#what are even the tags for this uh#sir hop a lot#Crumb#??#crumb the mouse#crumb the squire#dunno if i'd count this as spoilers but just in case#cinderella’s castle spoilers#cc spoilers#cinderellas castle spoilers#brrotothers forrerevvrerrer#also i was supposed to post this earlier BUT I FORGOT because im a MONSTER#but its fine#mhm
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Carlos Sainz | F1 London Live in 2017 | x x x x x
#carlos sainz#autumn posts#explored this event last eve and omg so many wonderful moments!!!!#oh to be able to time travel 🚀 surfing the web will have to do!!#also I'll still reblog and post RBR of old and Max related content in 2025 but#wow they have made some immensely frustrating decisions as a company#I do sure despise their upper management!#also tbh I am glad newbies get chances but it seems like 2025 is going to be maybe too many rookies maybe o.o idk I just got here#and I know F1 teams are probably trying some succession planning and lots of new brands hopping on seem geared to younger fans#and I love Gabi and Jack and I'm sure Ollie and Kimi are great! idk them as well yet! and I miss Franco :(((#but idk I'm already missing the older drivers we lost like what do you mean Carlos is fourth oldest he's my age 🥲#idk I like grizzled old men!!!! and drivers who are still in their prime!! 30s isnt old!!! (I know it is in the world of f1 but...)#idk I know big F1 is trying to plant seeds but they're pulling up perfectly gorgeous trees to do so....I just got here too!!!!!!#hmmmm rambling balogna from a new fan#also I dont like watching cars crash so really really hoping the races next year with all these green drivers aren't too bad 🫣#idk I get worried!! and all the engineers and bts folks have to deal with wrecks so#mannifesting safe drives and good starts 🙏✨#and rbr and vcarb are on my shit list for now but the Max blogging will not cease#he and I will both be in our sixties and I'll be here salivating hehe 😵💫✨#gosh dad bod Max 😵💫❤️✨ heaven help me the thirst blogging will be off the charts here#okay enough yapping!!!#wishing everyone a v excellent Friday!! ☀️☁️🌙✨#brb soon to spam F1 Live in London content bc oh gosh what a rich well#also I won't spam too much hehe I'll space it out#also the Little Mix girlies (gn) were OUT at this event so that was fun!!#an insta feed of F1 drivers and a ton of Little Mix bloggers since they performed there! and I like Jade!! I gotta check when her albums out#okay autumn out!!! 🫡❤️✨ bye for now!
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self indulgent horross doodles just because i can >B)
#art#my art#my doodles#utmv#horror x cross#cross sans#cross!sans#horror sans#horror!sans#horror#cross#horross#horross or horroross...i think i'm gonna settle with the first one HHH#i have no idea what the actual ship name even is but i think it sounds pretty fitting xD#i wanna draw more of horror so much....he's so fun to sketch wawhahghga HIM<3333#anyways shout out to blue for inspiring me cause goshsh there's SO many scenarios i can think of and doodle but maan#cross hates being stuck in bed cause he gets antsy headcanon<3 also because he hates feeling bored or useless :'(#but horror is just as stubborn about self care and spoiling his teammates with healthy snacks so good luck trying to escape him<333#i also wanna draw more random less detailed/rendered art and actually post them for funsies this time!#because gosh i can't doodle the ideas i want to make when i keep nitpicking the drawings and spending hours on one piece augyhgh#next doodles up are probably gonna be about crepic because *shrugs*#i might as well have been dragged into the ships i never thought i would ever ship cause wow. i am weak for some bromance<333#gosh cross keeps attracting every type of individual in the multiverse istg HHH xD he's fun to write so ofc he is<333#thank you all for your support btw!! muah muah have a nice day everyone<3333
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I'm back and Guys they played my favourite song they played where your eyes don't go and they played spy and last wave and the darlings of lumberland and let me tell you about my operation and
#my back hourts ough. and i totally froze my ass of standing in that queue in the rain for 2 and a half hours#but well it was worth it for the spot right by the stage!!!!!!#and oh my gosh. oh mmy god. this was so!!!!!!!#well first of all it was so damn fun i was bouncing and singing along the whole time#and there were so many great moments even besides the fact that the setlist was AHHHFHG SO FUCKING GOOD?????#and it actually got even more crazy during the second sent it was all just one 'no way' moment after another#and my pal got the setlist i'm so happy for them..... but uyeah i have so much to talk about#i'm totally making that proper concert review later and going into detail on all the stuff#and i actually got many more videos than i planned because as i said there were so many 'NO WAY i gotta record this' moments#like i actually don't know if i should just put them on youtube and link them here or what#because i have the entirety of spy recorded among other things#well first i'll need to make sure that the videos came out ok but i probably shouldn't have to worry about that much#thankfully my brother's phone is pretty well suited for this kind of stuff unlike mine#anyway will get into all that later like later next week even maybe so when i'm back home#in the meantime i'll have to reflect on all this anazingness. oh my god this was so awesome.#as my pal said it's so easy to undestand now why there are people who go to hunderds of their concerts and never get bored of it all#so worth the wait i love you tmbg i had so much fun aaaaahhhhh ok going to bed now i'm so tired but very happy#goosepost
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Made some matcha focaccia via Archie Cartwright's recipe :) pretty sure I fucked up the focaccia part but damn if it doesn’t have a great matcha flavor (my favorite !!) <33
ignoring my possibly terrible baking when it comes to bread (tastes good tho) Go listen to Fawx & Stallion by @224bbaker and support their season 2 crowdfund! wonderful podcast and such a delight to listen to <3
#camera talks#fawx & stallion#also the color is really vibrant bc a) i added more matcha than necessary (what did i tell you. i like matcha <3)#and b) i used ceremonial grade which to my knowledge has a kinda deeper color and flavor than culinary so yeah#also this tastes Really good with a drizzle of honey or even just plain gosh its so good#and like i said i Don't think i nailed the way focaccia is supposed to look or rise but that is for next time <3#(i will be making this again :))#ANYWAYS. this was very lovely and fun to make. i enjoyed my early morning drive to the store for yeast and olive oil <3
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"You were so right to distance yourself from that group of people !"
Thanks for the ego boost. I did it with the help of my coping mechanisms, my trauma responses and the ability to over-analyse everything until it makes sense.
Now, spill the tea. What happened, in great details.
#I LOVE IT WHEN THEY ADMIT I WAS RIGHT#TRUST MY INSTINCTS GUYS I KNOW WHAT I'M DOING#(i don't)#when it comes to people i always have my reasons#and damn it they're very good reasons#i didn't notice how much i needed this validation until i received it#like 'ah yes you were right from the beginning your opinion is valuable' OH MY GOSH BESTIE THANK YOU I LOVE YOU#i won against the hesitation and the nostalgia i'm gonna celebrate it right now guys i was RIGHT and they ADMITED IT#it's so comforting to know i'm right when it comes to the people i can trust#sometimes i'm wrong yeah but most of the time i can trust myself and it's good news#but also i love to hear their dramas i need all the details without getting involved lmao#they're so stupid and toxic it's fun to watch them destroy themselves <3#toxic people#toxicity#toxic relationship#toxic friends#toxic frienship#whispers from atlantis#bestie's trinkets box
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Rewatching Clone Wars and Rebels and I just gotta say it. Star Wars peaked with those shows. I love them so much
#the clone wars was so unique cuz it was focused on main characters#but it also had 4 episode arcs with different characters#like you weren’t always with the same characters#and the character arcs were SO good man#and it wasn’t scared to touch on the horrors of war and the complications of politics#and it individualized the clones in such a wonderful ways#and traumatized me so much with the amount of on screen deaths#10/10 show I love it so much#and then Rebels only really focuses on the small group of characters#but my gosh the dynamics are just so fun#idk what happened but the soul got sucked out of Star Wars#I will forever be a Disney Star Wars hater#idk if rebels is Disney Star Wars#but I suppose it was at a time when Disney was making actual good stuff#regardless the modern Star Wars is awful#I watched the first two episodes of Ahsoka and I’m not impressed#I’m going in with high standards cuz the low standards are giving people too much credit#but yeah#that show def should’ve been animated man#these live action actors can’t show an ounce of emotion#like ever#what is wrong with these people#sorry I need to calm down I’m so salty about what happened to Star Wars lol#anyways clone wars and rebels are amazing#they have their flaws but they’re so good in their own ways with delightful characters#smiles rambles
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Clawing at the walls I hate that I don't have enough time to keep up with all the QSMP and Purgatory POVs / lore I'm interested in, I JUST WANNA KNOW WHATS HAPPENING!!!! I WANNA SEE IT ALL!!!!!!
#i talk#qsmp talk#purgatory talk#IM A SPONGE FOR KNOWLEDGE AND INFORMATION AND THE CONSTANT FLOW IS EXCEEDING MY ABILITY TO ABSORB#by which I mean being an adult with a full-time job makes it so hard to be a QSMP fan OTL#I just wanna know all the things... and not just summaries I want all the juicy details#I want to know the exact quotes I need primary sources#I don't like hearing things second-hand and even when I DO hear them from trusted sources#I like looking things up myself because#what was the tone? what was the context? what was the response to what was said?#It's important!!! It can change my entire perspective rather than if I just took a quote or summary at face value!!!!#agh!!!!#QSMP / MCYT as a whole was the worst possible media for me to get into because it's IMPOSSIBLE to know it all#Meanwhile I'm cited the official gosh dang Transf0rmers wiki#because I'm literally the ONLY person who transcribed an interview from one of the (at the time) recent TV show writers#I wish I'd known how to archive / download streams at the time. It's lost media and I'm so glad I summarized things / transcribed stufd#* stuff. But I could've done it even better...#anyways that's a big reason why I run R.A. I want the clips for my own sake but I also like providing context for other fans#agh. I AM mostly exhilarated with the Purgatory 2 things because Quackity's commentating is SO fun#and it's a good way for me to keep up w/ multiple POVs without watching 10 streams at once#but I'm still missing out on things. And I've missed SO MUCH QSMP lore.#I never used to miss a Phil stream but now I'm so behind on VODs#OTL#none of this is super serious complaining this is more of a ''man wouldn't it be nice if I could do it all?'' thing#Anyways. Idk if you read tags Bell but if you see this — you're a real one for posting so many clips#I appreciate you so much#*** Meanwhile I'm cited on#missed a word there
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hey siri how do I stop feeling gutwrenchingly anxious in the guilt way for using the treatment methods available to me to not be in constant misery
#starlight personal#it’s very bizarre to have my life going objectively well - work is good! personal life is good! family is good!#and still be very mentally ill and feel like I’m faking it even though I know damn well I ain’t scream-sobbing every couple of days alone in#my apartment for attention because What Attention??? my cat????? Bug is never moved by my tears she cares only for string and wires#like I know that cannabis has been immensely helpful to getting me to fucking sleep on a regular schedule and that’s integral to -#my functioning and I know that having emergency klonopin in the event of a total breakout is helpful#and I KNOW that my PMDD and depression and anxiety are very treatment resistant and ketamine is the only thing that’s provided any -#meaningful relief and logically I know I’m not abusing any of these#I’m getting a promotion at work I still go out to see friends regularly I have hobbies I have a girlfriend (??? Wild right)#like clearly these things are working because i’m better now than i was for years leading up to now#SO LIKE. DON’T STOP USING THE THINGS THAT HELP. LOGICALLY THIS MEANS THESE ARE GOOD FOR ME#I always roll my eyes when ppl go off their meds b/c they’re feeling better like babes that’s what the meds are meant to do#if you stop taking them you stop feeling better - but it’s REALLY HARD to get past the cultural conditioning#the feeling that ‘but I can white knuckle my way through this I can force myself to live without’ like WHY BITCH#WE DON’T HAVE TO LIVE WITHOUT#AND ALSO. WE’RE STILL GENERALLY MISERABLE BRO. EVEN WITH OUR LIFE IN A BETTER PLACE!!!#DO YOU NOT THINK THIS MEANS THAT WE SHOULD USE WHAT WE KNOW WORKS TO BE LESS MISERABLE#basically it’s really hard to not feel like a loser when the only things that help are ‘fun’ drugs like weed and psychedelics#I feel like I’m being a hedonistic reprobate which 1) is actually kinda cool now that I wrote it out#2) @ myself were not a good enough liar-faker that every medical professional we see wouldn’t pick up on that if that was our motivation#time to remind myself that it’s arrogant to think I could trick many trained professionals without actively trying tbh#that generally helps me get out of my self-pitying ‘ohhhhh I’m awful and lazy and bad and abusing substances’ spiral#to be very mentally ill on main it is weirdly reassuring to be like ‘just as my fanon interpretation of obi wan kinda hates himself but is -#practical enough to take care of himself even when it makes him cringe and want to scratch his face off; I too am aware that self-care is -#radical and punk and In Fact Necessary to beat back the dark and live in the light with hope so yes even though I doubt and -#feel squiggly and guilty about it I’m not going to NOT prioritize my health and well-being b/c self-hatred and self-denial benefits no one’#thank you inner obi wan i love projecting my issues onto you mwah mwah mwah smooches for my favorite boy!!!!!#and smooches for me I’m going to be proud of myself gosh darn it even if I have to fake it at first#see I wouldn’t be able to be nice to myself like this if I hadn’t been doing ketamine treatment for a year IT WORKS BRO KEEP IT UP#SCHEDULE THE DAMN APPOINTMENT AND CLEAN YOUR BONG
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this time last year i was probably sitting in the kitchen while my dad started making an early dinner of chicken bolognese trying not to get too nervous about the concert i'd be going to in a few hours
#the nyc concert was last year. LAST YEAR .#thats so insane like yeah that feels like a year ago but good god the insane amount of stuff that has happened since#but god i remember that day so well#it was cloudy and a little rainy in the morning which made me ough thinking it was a bad omen and wouldnt be as fun#and i remember going to library and printing out my silly letters (i should have just. not done that lol)#and on the DAY OF on the way back home from the library#i even bought a cropped black blazer specifically for my concert outfit. havent worn it since lmao#and my dad and i even watched a movie at lunch#a short movie but a movie nonetheless. lol and even then i was like oghh my gosh excitement and nervousness#and then the car service getting there i felt so fancy and as the drive started the clouds were magically dissipating#so that it was a nice clear evening when i got to the theatre#and then all the insanity of the show. god i cant believe it still after all this time. wowie#going to listen to a playlist of the show setlist im gonna get emotional now. guys........#one of my fave memories is how everyone started standing up as they went into so may we start so i was like ok are we all doing this#and stood up too and then stood for the entire rest of the concert. i think the first 3-5 rows were like that for the whole show#surreal and insane i was front row. those guys were REAL and CLOSE#i was also very excited to notice russells new shoes :) when i wasnt like awooga (how i was 99% of the time)#there was one so may we start jump that was well. yeah. front row baby#i think after latte i was like ok i cant film i gotta just vibe#religious experience doing the 'ah ah ah's during that. really interesting#ok im not gonna go through the whole show again but wowie one of my most insane nights. second only to hollywood bowl#wow what a fun year it was. just so many incredible moments#ok yay 💖 happy one year to all that. love those guys so much#spars#ok not actually done beaver o lindy was INSANE LIVE!!! AS WAS EVERYTHING ELSE. so fun ok now done for real
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so cool to see loved ones change and grow…
#this is 90% me just loving my sister DHDJDHD but 10% everyone else#but like#yall my little sister’s so cool and capable and all that#and it’s so fun now to see that she really is like#fully her own person#her not being at home for uni is bizarre and we all miss her loads#but she’s really really blossoming into a like. an individual self. which sounds weird but#idk she texts me and it’s just like. oh my gosh#our family baby. is an adult. a baby adult but an adult#weird feeling cool feeling idk sisterhood. is something#it’s sweet that even like 3 hours away she still cannot resist the ‘baji did you know-‘ at any opportunity to speak#she seems so introverted but She Is A Talker#in any case#i’m excited to see where she goes and what more she becomes#not in a like. job way exclusively. but just like#see her grow into more traits and what lessons she carries with her through her experiences and all the goodness that’s bound to come#i’ve cried to you’re gonna go far kid by noah kahan too many times since she started uni to not ve aware of this stuff#HDJDHDH#mano.mindtalk
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The Beach Boys Love You (1977) is such a questionable album I mean it’s barely even a Beach Boys album based on who contributes what but she’s so silly to me ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
#talkingcore#could YOUR fave make a song all about how manly Johnny Carson is? what about fucking planets#what do the planets mean!!! and have you ever seen sun shine in the morn??#its batshit insane it pioneered synthpop almost 40 years ahead of time#being seconds away from divorce struggling with substance abuse and being abused by your therapist can make some good songs#actually they just lead you not to make music for like 10 years but that’s besides the point Thank You Brian Wilson#Pet Sounds is the greatest album of all time? I’d like to see where in Pet Sounds there’s a song about honking down the gosh darn highway#i think it’s gonna be on loop this is not looking good for my future#like okay literally it’s a Brian Wilson solo album but they were like fuck it The Beach Boys need to put something out#so it became the bbs love you and not Brian loves you#which like yes the other members contribute vocals but literally All the lyrics and instruments are Brian#which by the way it’s all synths which is really insane and fun for the time#and also given the point in his life he was at he absolutely should NOT have been allowed to make lyrics#i mean hell during his accepted peak he had other people handling lyrics#so you want him making words while his brain is melting???? okay ig#that’s how you get roller skating child……. but it slaps though!!!!!!#omg I’ve not explained hey little tomboy on here oh my god#it’s not on love you I don’t like the album it’s from but ohhhh my god what a song………#OH FORGOT TO ADD you have a duet between Brian and his wife about like love shit and it’s actually really pretty#but like they’re on the brink of divorce when it was recorded so it’s amusing in that sense
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why does doing anything that should be pleasurable and stress-free make my anxiety spike
#i am going out and having a good time tomorrow gosh dammit#i already paid for the thing i gotta pay for and i can't. i can't physically go to the location#until it's time to go to location#my body and brain are buzzing like bzzz bzzz bzzz gotta get it done gotta get it done#like girl what are you on about? having FUN? ever heard of it?#tales from diana#it's just the state of mind ive been in for a long time#i like hardly ever 'go out' or do something even half-adventurous#im seeing a play tomorrow :)#WHY IS THAT SO NERVE-WRACKING????#bc im a recluse. goodbye
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Holy gosh, been a time since a fic made me actually bawl my eyes out
#the topic of friends and friendship just get me so much#the fact you love someone with all your heart and how it feels when you fight and make up and things change and stay the same#fuck it's like one am I am not prepared to think about the future and changes fuckkkkkk what a good fic#I'm destroyed and !!! nothing bad even happened they just fought and forgave each other and are on the path to fix everything but gosh#it's really affecting me hard. time to drink some water and watch fun videos and go to sleep kjhgfdfghj#me being me
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Mmmm.... This bitch...
Idk I just had fun and sketched without thinking much hehe
Full thing lol
#OKD MANNNNNB#DUEE DUEE DUDE DUDHEHDUDJWJR#HEAKDIJDA DUEEEEEE#GRHSJDJFUSRUS OH MY GOSH OH MY GIAH 👹👹👹👹#IMDYING IM DUMYING IM DEADD#DUDE WHAT THEBFUCKKKejmakfms#oh ky gosh oh myoghs#HIS HIS HIS- HIM#HIM YIM HIMHIMHHIHMHIMHIMHJGMGIMGIGMHKHMHIMHIHMHIHM#😭😭😭😭HELP ME LORD#where do i fucking sta- HES SO BEAUTIFUL#WHTA I. THE ASSS#u HAVE FUN MAKING ME SUFFER FUCK U#🤤🙏🏼please never think again if u did THIS without it PLEASE#IM SO FUCKING SPEECHLESS HES SO BEAUTIFUL#HIS HSIR#ITS SO DETIALED AND BEAUTIFUL AND LONG#HIS PRETTY BANGS DUDE IMMA SHIT MYZE#THEY GO SO BEAUTIFUL DOWNWARDS AND THE WAY THEY- HOW DID U COOK SO GOOD#u shouldn't post this byw#its like- dangerous#my heart hurts too much#the pointy ears 👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹#lemme lick ONE time only plsplsplspls#the wrinkles *passes away*#STOP HES SO BEAUTIFUL HIS SMILE HIS EYES#THE CHEEKS??? THEYRE SO PRONOUNCED IM GONNA DIE IM SO PISSED RN JUMPING UP AND DOWN IM SOMPISSED#his nose in the third one- wha- SO BEAUTIFUL HOW HOW IM SPEECHLESS DUDE#U DID AN AMAZING JOB JOW DID U GET HIM LIKE THIS SO BEAUTIFUL? HWO HOW HOW HOW I DONT UDNERSTAND HIS BEAUTY IS TOO STAGGERING ITS BEYOND MEE#his eyes....his side profile....his winky face....his everything...
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