#agh!!!!
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accidentally sunk like 40 hours into my disco elysium save this week alone and then got myself fucking killed like an idiot so now we starting over i guESS
#i just. i just want to finish my fucking game.#honestly i want to do a few playthroughs and get at least a few of those six endings#but that starts with getting an actual ending first not dying the second you find your fucking suspect#AGH!!!!#im dumb#disco elysium#disco elysium game#rpg#disco elysium shitpost#harry du bois#kim kitsuragi
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the scene where hiccup flies with toothless for the very first time will always make me sob like a baby. boy and dragon who started off so careful, so cautious, calculating every single step ... they made so many mistakes, it was sloppy it was slow. neither of them can fly without the other! but it's only when they actually lose their footing, they're falling to their demise, is their trust actually tested. hiccup reaches forward while flip flopping in the air like. some kind of fish . toothless is so frightened as well he's going to fall he can't fly he can't fly !!!! hiccup lunges toward toothless, stretches as far as his arms can take him. and when he finally does, when he finally regains his stability, he completely chucks the cheat sheet because dammit he can't even read the stupid thing because of the wind . and that's when it becomes natural, it's a gut instinct, it's a shared love !!!! love !!! it suddenly feels RIGHT!!!!!! this is what it's all about!!!! after all!!!!!!!
#jay does a think#httyd#hiccup#toothless#this is nature intertwined with humanity!!!!!#agh!!!!#remind me to rewatch the movies again#maybe reread the books too. oh and the. Shows
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I asked him eagerly how he was doing, and he smirked, looked down at either the table in front of him or at his lap, and mumbled in a low, sultry tone, and a slightly raspy voice,
“Sooo good~ reallll nice…”
And oh. My. God. I almost couldn’t breathe afterwards.
He CANNOT do this to me.
#WHYYYY MUST HE DO THIS IN FRONT OF THE CLASS BRO#I THINK I WAS THE ONLY ONE LIKE oh my god.#AAHHH#UURGH#AASGGDJHSJ#AGH!!!!#U#personal#❤️#teacher crush#teacher crush community#tc community#tc#tcc#teacher attachment#tc love#teacher love#male teacher#male tc#teachers pet#teacher x student#tc ramblings#tc thoughts#tc feelings#tc imagines#tc confessions
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yesterday, one of my elementary school students, whom i teach english to as a second language, explained ionic dissociation of acids to me. like, she walked me through the equations and everything. in english. all by herself. i know the elements of the periodic table in english and a few basic chemistry terms from school, but that’s about it. she went on to explain the whole dissociation process, and whenever we hit a word neither of us knew, she just looked it up in the dictionary and kept going, immediately using the new vocab. keep in mind, she’s technically supposed to be in a lower grade but started school a year early. kids her age usually have A2-level english (god i wish) and don’t know a word outside their textbooks. they wouldn’t even attempt to tell me what they did over the weekend if it meant using vocabulary that wasn’t taught in school. then, after the lesson, she texts me this:
WHY ARE YOU APOLOGIZING FOR BLOWING MY MIND!!!! YOU’RE LITERALLY LINGUISTICALLY GIFTED!!!!
#NEVER apologize to me for stuff like that!!!!#agh!!!!#after the lesson i talked to her mom bc there was no way i was going to let it slide#also i might have told the mom to get her checked for adhd#but i’ve been saying this for years now#anyway#before i had a lesson with this student i had a tragic class with another student of mine#it was sooooo bad i wanted to scream#had to do a pep talk by the end of the lesson (hated doing that)#but then i taught the student from the post#and it was just#wow#felt like i wasn’t even working tbh#english teacher#teaching#teachers of tumblr#english#languages#moira speaks
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the link between "bad stuff is going on, i want to be creative to keep myself distracted" and "i feel bad so my brain is refusing to be creative" is fucking Criminal, actually
#AGH!!!!#worse when your brain tries to make you feel bad about creating. be quiet up there#having a big family health scare + only half my adhd meds + people visiting constantly = hellish#fredspeaks#will delete i just have to AAAA
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Hey, my sweet~
Guess who finally had time to make you a delicious treat again ❤
Hope you'll enjoy it. ^///^
*brings a second piece. Whispering* and give that to Nosy. That little rascal deserves one too ;3
PIIIEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!! 💚💕🍎
It looks utterly delicious, Yuki!! 🥹 Thank you so much!!🥹💚💕
Oh, you would have to be careful with that 🤣 Nosy would try to munch both pieces. 🤣👍
#Yuki#🍰💚#ask#pie!!!!#apple pie!!!!!#the scent of cinnamon!!!!#AGH!!!!#APPLES!!!!!!#THIS IS THE BEST!!!#💚#💚🍎💚
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Clawing at the walls I hate that I don't have enough time to keep up with all the QSMP and Purgatory POVs / lore I'm interested in, I JUST WANNA KNOW WHATS HAPPENING!!!! I WANNA SEE IT ALL!!!!!!
#i talk#qsmp talk#purgatory talk#IM A SPONGE FOR KNOWLEDGE AND INFORMATION AND THE CONSTANT FLOW IS EXCEEDING MY ABILITY TO ABSORB#by which I mean being an adult with a full-time job makes it so hard to be a QSMP fan OTL#I just wanna know all the things... and not just summaries I want all the juicy details#I want to know the exact quotes I need primary sources#I don't like hearing things second-hand and even when I DO hear them from trusted sources#I like looking things up myself because#what was the tone? what was the context? what was the response to what was said?#It's important!!! It can change my entire perspective rather than if I just took a quote or summary at face value!!!!#agh!!!!#QSMP / MCYT as a whole was the worst possible media for me to get into because it's IMPOSSIBLE to know it all#Meanwhile I'm cited the official gosh dang Transf0rmers wiki#because I'm literally the ONLY person who transcribed an interview from one of the (at the time) recent TV show writers#I wish I'd known how to archive / download streams at the time. It's lost media and I'm so glad I summarized things / transcribed stufd#* stuff. But I could've done it even better...#anyways that's a big reason why I run R.A. I want the clips for my own sake but I also like providing context for other fans#agh. I AM mostly exhilarated with the Purgatory 2 things because Quackity's commentating is SO fun#and it's a good way for me to keep up w/ multiple POVs without watching 10 streams at once#but I'm still missing out on things. And I've missed SO MUCH QSMP lore.#I never used to miss a Phil stream but now I'm so behind on VODs#OTL#none of this is super serious complaining this is more of a ''man wouldn't it be nice if I could do it all?'' thing#Anyways. Idk if you read tags Bell but if you see this — you're a real one for posting so many clips#I appreciate you so much#*** Meanwhile I'm cited on#missed a word there
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/ Not gonna lie, I'm really hoping that when f.go finally incorporates c.amazotz in game, they don't turn him into a 'single trick pony' joke kind of character (in the sense that he only appears to do the same thing and thats all there is to him) and make it so all that he has around him is giving us alter servants; LIKE! I'm biased as heck in waiting for alter a.rthur but I hope he comes over c.haldea like any other a.rtoria alter versions
#;ooc#ooc#not to be a lil hater but i hate when characters get reduced to ONLY the joke#i dont mind it at all as a funny bit; its just when they turn their whole character around -that- aspect#so i hope they dont reduce him to 'factory of alters' ONLY; i dont mind the joke popping up its just i want him to be more than that#i'll always be bitter about c.yno in g.enshin impact like; lately thats lit all he's been reduced to#the guy who makes cringe jokes and thats it#AGH!!!!#c.amazotz doesnt have -as- much recent existing research as lets say other m.aya deities but#there's still a lot of symbolism and things that can be incorporated#for instance; i would love to see mentions of his thoughts about the twins or xibalba or the tests or the lords themselves#or mentions of the popol vuh itself; that would be soooo cool!#also going back to the turning characters into only jokes; i also feel like i.zou falls so much into this circle#i like silly moments just like anyone else! its just when its constantly the only thing that's ever brought up#ok now that i took that off my chest i can vibe OITORUT#i just think he's so cool i love him
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god has reunited me with you tumblr
#self isolating but nobody i know is generally here anymore so it’s like a void i can post into#last time i was genuinely active ontumblr i was in high school?#now i just turned 20#in intensive outpatient therapy#dropped out of college#currently high as fuck#agh!!!!
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stupid john cusack with his big stupid beautiful brown eyes and cute idiotic fluffy black hair i hate your asss ooooooooo i hate it
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last week i went to a lcs and i bought 3 silk (2021) issues and one of them turned out to be from 2022 instead
#would it actually kill them to differentiate their modern solo titles better#this is far worse than the shang chi 2020-22 runs situation#agh!!!!#a.talks
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the aydinlan seminary is one of the top colleges in exandria... have we ever gotten to see and learn in one of these Big Academic Institutions before. i dont think so. im soo excited
#the closest is probably the cobalt soul but like#thats a ''u go look for books'' situation than a ''i tell you what you want to know and more'' situation#AGH!!!!#cr spoilers#lb
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All’inzio (Chapter 11)
Summary: A soldier-in-training, Valerie hopes to join the Valencian Army to avenge her father’s death under the wing of General Rooke. But when she happens to catch the attention of Commander Kane, her plans take a different turn.
Human AU of the Armada from Pirate101, where Kane meets his Queen.
Pairing: Kane/Queen
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Note: The title translates to “at the beginning”.
–
The first thing she did that night, upon returning home and putting her new dress where it belonged, was to write to her mother. Her last letter was filled with all the new things she experienced at the start of this week, but there was...so much more to write about now. She made brief mention of the unfortunate swimming lesson where she nearly drowned...but she did not want to scare Emilia in any circumstance, so she made sure to write about the pleasant things that happened lately. And that meant finally letting word out of her time with Kane. She mentioned him being responsible for the new apartment, but let herself write more of their talk from the other day.
She kept some things she learned of him a secret, figuring his experiences with war were personal. She could picture her mother having several questions about it. She kept things to a respectable amount of detail, but allowed some room to fawn over them. How could she resist? This was the man she had feelings for, and what she learned about him only increased her interest. She even gushed about him buying her a dress - all simply because she was getting stares otherwise. She wrote of him in a good light, and sent the letter off on its way that next morning.
She wore the dress out for the day, on her way to her lessons. She noticed the different reactions she received from nearby gentleman and the lack of scoffs from fellow women. It was quite the peaceful trip to her lesson with Aristide. By the time she was there, he was standing out front, tending to the flowers sitting on the window sill. When he saw her arrive, he gave a small comment on how lovely her new dress was and how good she looked in it. She went inside to carefully store it away, wanting nothing but for it to be safe and untouched.
"We are going to be doing things differently today." Aristide informed her. "What I did last time was....ah... how would one say, unacceptable?"
Valerie smirked. "Kane talked to you, didn't he?"
He opened his mouth for several moments. She realized this was the first instance she ever used Kane's name instead of his title. She hoped he wouldn't pry. Thankfully, he didn't. "-Yes....not really talk, but he showed his disapproval for what happened. That is why we are going to be taking certain precautions..."
She wasn't surprised when she found him taking flotation devices out. There was something different about him today. She could only imagine whatever Kane might've told - or warned - him about. He was cautious about getting her in the pool, but she was less afraid this time when he gave her something to float with. She found some comfort from hugging something close while she was in the water, especially when that 'something' was keeping her afloat. Aristide gave her an informative lesson that day about floating, and demonstrated methods on how to do it. Something about their time together felt...more formal than the last few ones.
She bid goodbye to him and found herself eager to leave. She wanted to spend a full day without receiving any looks for once. It felt almost natural to be back in her dress, and noticed how comfortable it was to wear now. She can see the appeal of wearing these...it gave her so much movement, and she felt like a true lady! One that belonged in such a place as Florenza....She pushed her hair back as she went outside, ready to be part of the crowds for once.
But when she found a figure at the end of the walkway, she knew her plans would change.
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Kane's direction changed lately.
He never planned to stay in Florenza for long. In fact, he intended to leave ages ago and remain elsewhere. He was needed back in Cadiz, with his strategists and soldiers. Anywhere else besides an island filled with snobbish, unicorn-obsessed people. He admired everything Florenza had to offer for their studies, their accomplishments in the arts and sciences...but the people here were too conceited for his taste. And that was saying something, as he worked for the most vain man in Valencia.
So, why is he here? He already knows the answer, but it's still baffling.
He didn't involve himself in the lives of his soldiers or those who worked for him. He didn't need to. He had an important profession that kept his time and attention. But what happened was that he let himself get curious. He did what was necessary, collected what he wanted, but there was something possessing him to want more. It wasn't the manifestation of his study nor was its cause, but one recipient in particular that led him astray:
Valerie Toscani.
His fascination with her was as unadulterated as he led on. And he blamed that on how capable she revealed herself to be. But there was more after he scratched that surface. He thought her beautiful the moment he saw her, even in the uniform of his cadets. The way she performed was just as enthralling, and he was annoyed at how quickly he picked up on that. His interest from then only continued to grow. She caught his attention. After he learned more about her, he wanted to continue this involvement.
That was the slippery slope that led him here.
He was snapped out of his thoughts when he heard the door close. He glanced up and found the woman of his thoughts strolling towards him with a bright smile. He noticed the dress he bought for her situated comfortably on her frame. He put her in his favorite color per his taste, as he thought it would compliment her the same. This held true, as he found himself admiring the way her dress glittered when she approached him.
"Have you been waiting here?" He nodded. She blinked in surprise. "Why...?"
"I arrived a little early. I stayed here until your lesson finished." He led her on the sidewalks to start their walk to her apartment. "Did your instructor correct his mistakes..?"
"-Well, if you could call it that. I heard you scolded him more than you informed him."
He briefly recalled his talk with Aristide that morning. If he was emphatic at all, he hadn't noticed it. In his mind, he gave him a thorough explanation on what he did wrong and how to correct it. Kane remembered being a little strained during the process; it was stressful to recall how scared Valerie sounded when she confessed she nearly drowned. He understood such a thing was traumatic for her, and wished for the situation to improve. He knew how to get through to anyone in an instant, so Aristide should've understood the point well.
"It's my job to do that when expectations aren't met. Things did go better this time, right..?"
"They did. I was only teasing you." He looked away. "Aristide gave me something to float with and taught me how to do it on my own."
"Wonderful job." He noted this process may take awhile at the rate it was going. "You got back in the water quickly."
She rubbed her arm and smiled at him. "Our talk yesterday helped me. It meant a lot that you cared, you know."
He focused on their direction, noticing it would take a few minutes until they were there. He didn't come today to act as an escort - as suitable as it was. Their conversation further encouraged his interest in her. Not that there was anything particularly astounding about her presence - but her company was...enjoyable. He grew tired of following all the formalities whenever they spoke. He wanted those barriers down, as he intended to speak with her more. It grew tiresome hearing his status constantly after awhile.
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When they were finally there, he assisted her inside the complex, where he followed her up the stairs and to her room. She expected him to come right in, as he found her holding the door open for him. He went to say something but found his mind blank, so he thanked her and followed after. He watched as she fussed with her hair and looked around. When she saw him standing in front of the door, she motioned for him to get comfortable on the couch and tugged at the end of her dress.
"Wait here," She told him. "I'll be right back."
And so he obeyed. He sat himself on the furniture and waited for her to return. His eyes wandered in the meantime, at how simple she kept her decor, to the few framed paintings she had on the walls. That was all he looked at before she came back into the room. He rolled his head towards her and noticed what changed.
Around her neck was a string of pearls, each a similar yet slightly different color situated comfortably against one another. His eyes locked on them as he thought of how attractive it looked against her skin. She must have noticed his stare, as she began to slide one of the pearls between her fingers nervously.
"That's a nice necklace."
"This was a gift from my father. It was a present for my training graduation." Her look turned a little sad. "They're real. He put them together himself."
Kane had nothing else to say at that moment. He stared a little more at the pearls, ashamed he hadn't realized they were real at a first glance. He stood and made his way over to her, attempting to get a better look at them. He realized how improper it would have been to keep his eyes locked on her chest, and met them with her instead. He quickly glanced down at them, being the last time he'd concern himself with it.
"--A meaningful gift." He brought his fingers to the pearls on his own, allowing his gloved hand to make contact with her skin. He lightly stroked their surfaces with his thumb. "-It looks lovely on you."
Her jaw fell open, but no words could leave her mouth. He prolonged the contact by casually looking over the pearls, then setting them back to rest on her collarbone. His fingertips felt hot as he withdrew - not realizing how badly he wanted to touch her skin. He recognized the impulse the other day, but he wasn't expecting to catch an opportunity. Reluctantly, he pulled away and allowed a reasonable amount of space between them. She urged a little closer to him.
"Kane..." She changed the subject. "The dress helped me. I've gotten less stares. You were right...I looked just like them, and they didn't bat an eye."
"That's to be expected. It compliments you well." His eyes met with hers. He felt that same warm feeling in his chest again. He was sure it wasn't because his uniform was too tight. "You should keep the necklace with it. Gold and white is a wonderful combination."
She brushed her hair to the side, eying him coyly. "Funny, I'm coming to like black and gold instead..."
It didn't take a genius to recognize she was talking about his clothes. He smiled unconsciously. "-Perhaps, we should try that on you sometime."
"I would be more than honored, Commander."
He cleared his throat. He had to focus and not waste his time. It troubled him how distracting she could be. "-Valerie, I've a reason for returning to you. I wanted to discuss with you-"
"Oh! If you want to talk, I insist we get comfortable."
Before he knew it, he was promptly sat on the couch by her small hand. She rested herself close to him as she folded her leg on top of the other. There was an eager look in her eyes as she waited for him to speak again. He was expecting her to be willing to hear from him, but her closeness took him by surprise. It didn't bother him regardless. He found himself situated nicely as he rested one boot on his knee. He took it upon himself to ask her one matter that's been on his mind - a topic that first intrigued him about her.
"-I recall from our first arrangement you mentioning your father; the unfortunate circumstances surrounding his passing." He chose his words carefully. "I know your personal distaste with pirates, but I want to understand more. How strong these feelings are, and how prominent they are with your goals."
She took a deep breath. "So, you want to talk about pirates..."
He nodded, but deep down, felt himself on the verge of losing his composure. He recognized how weak he was around this topic - how long he buried similar thoughts of his as to not burden his work. That was their first likeness he caught onto, and admittedly, the reason among others he wished to know more from her. He was hoping these feelings would be validated when he'd hear elaborate. As she closed her eyes and prepared her words, he mentally hoped they'd be the ones he wanted to hear.
"I never met one myself, but I have every reason to hate them. Things would be different if I had my father in my life. But I'll never know because of their selfish, greedy habits... Every story I heard of pirates is how they steal, kill, and feel no guilt for any of it. How can they feel better about themselves after taking the lives of innocent people? I will never understand it, and it makes me so..angry..."
She was gritting her teeth and clenching her fists hard in her lap. She took a moment to cool off. In that time, Kane looked at her in a mix of wonder and admiration - listening to how firmly she said her words, and how he could hear the venom dripping from them. It evoked a strange feeling...one he didn't have the time to understand. He knew one thing: he wanted to hear more.
"I have friends who were attacked by pirates. Who went through horrible things, and..." She looked away. "-Their lives were never the same. All of these stories, the women wrongly touched and spoken to... it inspired me to fight for them. To get rid of these horrible men who think it's justified to do whatever they want to girls. Everything they stand for is disgusting. I wish there was an end to them already."
He was so busy staring at her that he hadn't noticed the silence. She brought her eyes to his and he realized her story was finished. How unfortunate...he was waiting for more. "-That was enlightening."
His response made her confused. "Why did you ask me about this?"
"-Because I agree with you. You're speaking of a problem not many people address." He leaned forward. "I mentioned my navy was working to abolish piracy, but there is a much bigger problem at hand. I fear pirates are going to become a near issue for Valencia."
"Are you sure this is something to be sharing with me..?"
"You already recognize it. What happened to your father is one of many instances reported about them as of late. And quite frankly, they are as horrible as you speak. I've had run-ins with pirates myself. They are not cooperative to law. That is why they get away with the things you've mentioned - their influence is not one I wish to see in my homeland."
She looked interested now. "So, you're saying you think pirates are going to come to Valencia..."
He held up a gloved finger. "-Mere speculation. I'm just concerned about them. They are rogues with principles that contradict everything I stand for. I had yet to meet anyone that was directly affected by them. I hold no personal grudge, but I am always willing to listen to anyone's victimization."
"I lost my father to them. They've hurt people dear to me. And they are the only way I will get justice for my loss." Those words sounded so emotionless as they left her lips. She decided to change subjects. "-Would you care for some tea, by chance..?"
He told her 'yes', as he was looking for any chance to prolong his stay. She dipped her head and disappeared into the kitchen. He was left alone with his thoughts and shut his eyes. He received the words he wanted to hear, but he wasn't sure what to do with them yet. He hoped this matter would find its way between them again, as he did not intend ending this discussion here. Her footsteps came in and she set down small plates to hold the cups for them. She noticed his stare and cleared her throat.
"How long do you intend on checking in like this..?" She asked.
"What do you mean?"
"With me. Hearing of my lessons and...letting me get to know you." She stood up straight. "This has only been my first week, and I've seen you twice so far. I'm wondering how often you plan to come around, is all."
He sat back in his seat and looked away, mentally working through his schedule of his time here in Florenza. If he were to tell the truth, he wasn't needed that badly here at all. He was biding his time to check in on her. Sure, there were the matters of checking in on his fortress and overseeing his men stationed here...but there was nothing in drastic need of improvement. His soldiers did well here and had very little to report to him. That resulted in plenty of free time, which he spent in leisure working on his own projects. If he were to stay any longer, the only chance of getting actual stuff done was crammed with such little time...But what he'd be staying here for was another matter of itself.
Could he see that being worth it?
His eyes darted back over to hers. "-I will be here on the days of your lessons, to meet with you after them. I can't promise I'll make it to every one."
"Four days a week...?"
"Only if you'd like." He hesitated. "If you do not wish for my presence, I can leave you be in Florenza."
Her eyes widened and she opened her mouth to rebut, but the sound of whistling came from the kitchen. She mumbled an apology as she rushed into the other room. He sat back as she came with the kettle and poured the water in, allowing the tea to brew. She sat down next to him then remembered what she was about to say.
"No! I mean...I would like to see you. You are the only person I know here right now, besides my instructor." She laughed nervously. "And I think four days a week is plenty....if that's the most you can manage."
"Then that's how often you will see me."
She appeared to be delighted as she grabbed for her cup. "I'm glad to hear that...I'll be looking forward to spending this time with you, Kane."
The two of them enjoyed their drinks in silence. Kane mulled to himself that this is how he will be spending his next few weeks - or as long as this would take. It was an awfully long time since he put any effort into getting so well-acquainted with someone. It was with a woman as well, he noticed. Not that he didn't want to go out of his way and meet new people - just that no one had been interesting to him in a long while. And he was still pulled in by Valerie's words, how beautiful she looked out of her uniform for once. He was curious with her, and their company was anything but boring.
They made eye contact as they returned their cups at the same time. He got to see her eyes flutter as her fingers brushed along his knuckles. This was a decision he would not regret.
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AGHHAHAHHHAHAHAHAHAH KEITH EMERSON BOOK IS MINE
#elp#prog rock#keith Emerson#shoutout to my dad for buying me this#agh!!!!#bdbdbdhehevevegehshebdjeben
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okay ive finally watched pride and prejudice 2005 and i will never be normal again
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