#gonna take today and maybe tomorrow to just. work on that
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Two to One | 15 |
Pairing: Bakugou x Reader x Midoriya Chapter Title: Spilled Milk Chapter 14 | Chapter 16 Story Masterlist Summary: You are a simple college girl working at a cheap, back alley café! The top heroes, Deku and Ground Zero, visit your work in hopes of ordering coffee, but they pick something else up instead. You begin an interesting relationship with the pair, while slowly becoming aware of certain underhanded tactics they are using. Idolization isn't always that bad… Right?
WARNINGS: gaslighting, domestic violence, alcohol
“You’re WHAT?!”
Hana gaped back at (Y/n), trying to ensure she heard her correctly. (Y/n) smiled sadly at Hana.
“I just… got an opportunity elsewhere…,” she attempted to be vague. Hana didn’t look convinced.
“Please don’t tell me you’re starting an Only Fans.”
(Y/n) gawked. “No–! And even if I was…,” she made a face at Hana. Hana tutted.
“Please don’t tell me you’re starting an Only Fans without me,” she repeated, now laughing. The morning rush shift had slowed down to a nonexistent teeter. (Y/n) smiled at Hana’s comment as she cleaned one of the tables in the dining area of the quaint restaurant. Hana groaned, leaning back with her elbows on the countertop, her head tilting toward the ceiling.
“What am I gonna do without you here?!” Hana groaned at her best friend. (Y/n) announced that she put her two weeks in yesterday when Hana was off. Their manager flipped her shit, but Hana argued that she had it coming and that (Y/n) quitting should be the least of her worries. (Y/n) shrugged.
“I dunno. I’ll still stop by for some lattes. Give you guys some business with my big Only Fans money.”
Hana shook her head. “I’m gonna put my two weeks in tomorrow. Or I might just dip after today and not come back.” Hana’s curls bounced as she turned to check to make sure their manager was in the café backroom. Deep in the café backroom.
“You should stay for the chance of running into Shoto,” (Y/n) recommended, leaning on her elbows on the cashier counter. Katsuki and Izuku had been frequenting their café much more often lately, and she and Hana kid that it was only a matter of time before word of Sato’s traveled to Pro Hero Shoto. However, Hana still shook her head.
“What do you mean? We’re married. I see him every night. Work is my chance to get away from him!” She gave (Y/n) a coy smile. (Y/n) rolled her eyes, grinning, smacking Hana’s arm with a small hand towel.
“Shut up!”
Izuku and Katsuki threw themselves headfirst into their work, and (Y/n) shouldn’t have been surprised. It’s not like she expected things to change after she finally had sex, but she couldn’t help but feel as though the experience wasn’t as life-changing as it was all made out to be.
What was that feeling? That persistent nudging tug in the depths of her mind and gut, telling her that something more should be happening now, either between her, Izuku, and Katsuki or in her life? Disappointment? She lost her virginity to one of the most famous pro heroes in Japan, and the experience wasn’t anything less than euphoric. What was there to be disappointed about?
Maybe how neither Izuku nor Katsuki recognized (Y/n)’s perceived loss of innocence. (Y/n) considered bitterly whether there was even any innocence to ‘lose’, and why would having sex make her any less innocent? Was she dirty now? No, no. That’s not it. (Y/n) didn’t expect the heroes to celebrate or anything of that nature. That’d be rather disturbing. What was she expecting, though? Nothing ultimately changed after the intercourse. Not herself, not really. Not Katsuki. Not Izuku. What the hell even was virginity?
Did she want them to change? What more did she want to come from that experience?
“Izuku?” She called, sitting on the couch one night. It was late; Izuku had just gotten home from a 16-hour shift. (Y/n) never really knew if he and Katsuki chose to work that long willingly – their hours seemed flexible – but she did notice that Katsuki seemed to know his limits and take scheduled breaks throughout the day. She couldn’t say the same about Izuku.
“Yeah?” Izuku replied half-heartedly. He obviously didn’t want to speak to anybody right now. He was digging through the fridge, looking for leftovers to wolf down. (Y/n) was convinced that Katsuki was the only reason why Izuku remembered to even eat and shower or even take care of himself at all. Katsuki’s footsteps could be heard upstairs; he must’ve just gotten out of the shower himself.
“What’s virginity?” (Y/n) blurted obtusely.
The shuffling of plastic containers and cartons in the fridge stopped. Izuku stood upright.
“What?”
He sounded incredulous. (Y/n) didn’t want to look at him because she was so ashamed of her question.
“What’s virginity?” She repeated, a little louder and snappier, in case he didn’t hear her. Izuku looked at the back of her head with a wild stare.
“(Y/n), I’m not–,“ Izuku was not in the mood for whatever she was talking about.
“And what’s the point of it?” (Y/n) continued. Izuku dragged a hand down his face.
“I’m not sure what answer you’re looking for,” he was blunt, more blunt than he cared to be. He was exhausted. He just wanted to eat something, go to bed and turn the world off, not deal with whatever emotional turmoil (Y/n) was feeling.
“I just… don’t feel any different,” (Y/n) pondered aloud, not caring if Izuku wanted to talk or not.
She heard the fridge door shut and footsteps approach. “Uh, good?” Izuku spoke with a mouth full of chicken, which he didn’t even bother to heat up. “It’d be weird if you felt different after having sex?” Izuku stared down at her oddly. (Y/n) rolled her eyes.
“That’s not what I mean. I mean there’s, like…,” she made vague gestures with her hands. “It’s like nothing even happened.”
Izuku was tired, and when Izuku was tired, it was like talking to a brick wall. He was just as stubborn as Katsuki, if not more. This conversation was going nowhere. He swallowed the food he was chewing and shook his head, shrugging.
“I don’t know what to say.”
(Y/n) sighed, frustrated. She got off the couch and stormed up the stairs. “Ugh. Forget it.”
Izuku made his way over to claim the spot on the couch she left, continuing to eat his food.
Okay. (Y/n) can admit that she was being a little fussy. She blew by Katsuki, who was bent over in the middle of the hall replacing his bath items into the closet, and retreated into the bedroom.
Katsuki’s hair was still damp from his shower. He blinked, watching as she disappeared into the bedroom but left the door wide open. Katsuki stared at the door for a minute before inhaling slowly and letting out a sigh. He stood, closed the closet, and rubbed the back of his neck as he hesitantly followed after (Y/n).
He stood in the doorway with his hands in the pockets of his sweatpants. (Y/n) was on the bed, scrolling on her phone, obviously upset. Katsuki was debating whether he should bite or turn and walk away. Whenever he or Izuku gets into a bad mood, they typically avoid each other lest it blow up in their faces. He didn’t know how this would turn out with (Y/n).
He’ll bite. (Y/n) was more sensitive than Deku. She needed different things than he did. Katsuki was still learning.
He shifted his weight, feeling stiff. “Something happen?”
“No,” came the sharp reply. Katsuki blinked, and his face soured. Katsuki hadn’t heard her use that tone with him before.
“What?” He snapped back.
(Y/n) didn’t look up at him, still scrolling on her phone. “I said, no, nothing happened.”
Katsuki stared at her. “Okay, but something obviously did? Your attitude is shit right now.”
(Y/n) shrugged and shook her head. “Your attitude is always shit. What, I’m not allowed to be upset about something?”
Katsuki threw his head back and closed his eyes. He took a breath. Calm down. “So, something did happen?”
(Y/n) groaned, rolling her eyes. “You guys just… practically ignore me!” She blurted. “You’re never here! I moved out of my apartment, I put my two weeks in at my job for you, and you guys don’t even seem grateful… My whole life is about to change…”
Katsuki’s eyes narrowed. “Us? Grateful? We are paying your tuitionfor your shitty education. We are giving you free housing in one of the safest neighborhoods in Japan. We are giving you complete access to your own bank account with millions of yen already in it with no strings attached. If there’s anyone that should be grateful, I’m looking right at her.”
(Y/n) was teary-eyed at Katsuki’s harsh words. She yelled at him, “What if I was fine before all of that?!”
“Then leave!”
Izuku came up the stairs. He had dark circles under his eyes, and despite the argument, he didn’t appear urgent. “What’s going–“
“Go back to your shitty life. I don’t care,” Katsuki turned and disengaged, going downstairs and leaving (Y/n) crying on the bed.
Izuku could barely stand on two legs from exhaustion, but he relented the fact that Katsuki could handle himself. If there was anyone that needed to be pacified, it was (Y/n). He had to figure out how to settle all of this before the clock struck 1 AM so they could all get to bed peacefully.
He stepped further into the bedroom, staring with dead eyes at (Y/n) as she cried on their bed. He had to push himself to keep walking forward and to sit on the bed next to her. He waited silently for her to stop crying enough to look up at him.
Eventually, her sobs simmered, and she just sniffled. She rubbed her eyes, finally meeting Izuku’s gaze. This was the first time tonight that she really could see the exhaustion on his face, and she felt guilty for making tonight about her.
“What’s going on?” Izuku asks. His voice is calm and quiet, but she hears that tinge of something else – pity.
“I, uh…,” (Y/n) starts, now unsure why she’s upset. “I guess I’m just stressed. And worried. And scared.”
Izuku looked concerned. “About?”
(Y/n) sighed, wiping her eye. “I don’t know,” she paused for a moment. “Katsuki’s right. I should be grateful for all you guys have done for me… I don’t know why I’m feeling like this.”
Izuku glanced off into the hallway, probably trying to determine where Katsuki was in the house. “Are you… not happy here with us?”
(Y/n) instantly shifted to face him fully on the bed. “No, no! That’s not it at all. I’m very happy… It’s just… different.”
He stared at her. “It doesn’t sound like you’re happy. Or look like it, either.”
(Y/n) looked at him oddly, making a point to prevent any more tears from falling. “I am. I am.”
Izuku continued watching her. (Y/n)’s phone vibrated in her hands, and she glanced at it before turning it back over.
“Did we do something to upset you?” Izuku asked. (Y/n) shook her head.
“No, you guys didn’t do anything…,” her voice trailed off.
“We obviously did. What is it?” He could be just as forthright as Katsuki. “We can’t help if we don’t know.” What little patience was left inside of Izuku this evening was nearly depleted. He was trying his hardest to remain present and serene. (Y/n) shook her head. Her phone vibrated again, and Izuku couldn’t help how his gaze flickered down at it.
(Y/n) sighed, realizing Izuku wasn’t really going to leave her alone until she spoke; however, there was an air of shame that surrounded her.
“I just… think I need more attention, maybe…,” she tried not to wince, but she wasn’t sure how well she covered up her embarrassment. “I don’t know. I know you guys have long hours…,” she trailed off once again.
Izuku nodded, “We do.”
“Um…,” she didn’t know what to say next. “It’s okay. I’m sorry for bringing it up. I think I’m just a little emotional after…,” she referred to their night together the other week. And, now that she’d thought about it, it wasn’t like they were completely ignoring her, either. They gave her affection as much as they could, kisses and whatnot. They’d all messed around a bit since that night, but they hadn’t gone ‘all the way’ again. Maybe with each other, but not with (Y/n). She didn’t feel ready to, and she knew that upset Izuku. He didn’t say it, but he always seemed a little disappointed when he saw the hesitance in (Y/n)’s eyes and how her touch was fleeting instead of carrying the same passion they started with. It especially disappointed him how she lingered heavier on Katsuki during their intimate moments, leaving Izuku to occasionally feel like the third wheel. He didn’t want to speculate on why this would be, so he never brought attention to it in hopes that he was imagining it.
“I’m sorry,” what exactly was she apologizing for? She felt like she needed to, though. Izuku looked like he was going to fall over from exhaustion, she’d made Katsuki mad, and here she was complaining when they had given her any girl’s dream life.
Izuku was too tired to address this any further. He glanced at the hallway again to see if Katsuki had returned. He hadn’t. He must’ve banished himself to sleep downstairs on the couch.
“Let’s just go to bed, yeah?” Izuku offered.
(Y/n) sighed but reluctantly nodded, feeling like a piece of her was unfulfilled.
Katsuki and Izuku made more of an effort to attend to (Y/n) after that night by spending more time with her when they were home. It made (Y/n) feel worse because she didn’t want them to think she wasn’t satisfied with all they had given her thus far – and now she could see how they were actively trying to keep her happy on top of all of that? Why couldn’t she just be appreciative to begin with? She tried not to let the guilt eat her alive, especially when she remembered that no other person, let alone two people at once, had ever treated her this preciously.
While the two pro heroes built their relationships individually with (Y/n), tensions rose between them, and it made (Y/n) uncomfortable. She didn’t know if this was how they always were or if something recently sparked this apparent rivalry between the two men. As she spent more time settling into the home and acclimating to her new environment, she couldn’t help but notice the sly remarks or side glances they gave each other – about literally anything. Most of their spats had to do with work. (Y/n) hardly knew what truly occurred in the hero world, so she would stay out of it.
Day by day, though, her guilt faded. She felt happier and able to truly enjoy her place in their home, no longer feeling like an outsider or a guest. She was learning both of them, slowly but surely. Katsuki required a lot of attention, but he’d never outright ask for it. He’d linger around (Y/n), not exactly engaging with her but doing mindless things around the house, and he’d get defensive if she pointed it out. She appreciated it when Katsuki was more honest about his desires, especially when he came home and the first thing he did was give her a kiss. Izuku was an insufferable romantic and very different than Katsuki in that regard. He was much more comfortable showing affection, and he always prioritized his partners’ comfort over his desires.
Izuku was much more cynical than his media personality makes him out to be. Sometimes, he said things that even made Katsuki go silent.
Katsuki was also a very clean person. (Y/n) feels like he might have an oral fixation, or maybe he just really, really enjoys watching her eat his cooking. She isn’t sure.
(Y/n) was getting ready for bed, just getting out of the shower, when she heard the whack of skin coming from the kitchen. She paused, listening, her mind trying to reassure her that it wasn’t what she thought it was. The front door opened and slammed shut – someone left the house, or someone just entered. Her heartbeat thrummed in her ears. She quickly tiptoed out of the bedroom, trying not to slip, as she still hadn’t dried off completely, peering down the stairs and into the kitchen.
She caught a glimpse of Izuku sitting at the island by himself. Whatever ruckus went down a few minutes prior no longer remained, and the house was silent. (Y/n) clutched the towel that draped around her, making sure it wasn’t going to fall, as she crept down the stairs.
Izuku glared at her as soon as she entered the kitchen, making her freeze by the door.
“What happened?” (Y/n) asked quietly. Izuku rolled his eyes, finally getting up from his barstool. He opened a kitchen drawer, the one where they kept random medicines, and rummaged through the back of it. He pulled out a cigarette and a lighter he’d stashed there.
(Y/n) watched him as he lit his smoke. She’d never seen him smoke in the house before. She got a glimpse of his face, then. His cheek was red and beginning to lightly bruise. (Y/n)’s eyes widened, and immediately, she flashed back to the events at Koburi Pass. She quickly approached Izuku, cupping his face to get a better look.
“Katsuki did that…?” Her emotions were conflicted. Izuku instantly yanked his face away from her before her fingers could even touch him. He took a drag of his cigarette. Tobacco smoke filled the kitchen, and (Y/n) grimaced. She just noticed now that she was shaking. Neither she nor Izuku said anything to each other for a while. They stood together in the kitchen silently, and (Y/n) watched as Izuku finished his cigarette. He rummaged through the medicine drawer once again, pulling out another cig.
“How many…?”
Izuku cut her off, seemingly already knowing what she was going to ask. “I keep them there. He hasn’t found them yet, or if he has, he hasn’t said anything.”
“Is he going to be upset that you’re smoking in the house?”
Izuku laughed bitterly, smoke blowing out with his exhale. He rolled his eyes again and shook his head.
Izuku practically refused to talk to (Y/n) about anything. The two of them just remained in each other’s presence. (Y/n) felt like he needed that more than to talk through whatever happened. He eventually went to bed, but (Y/n) stayed up. Katsuki hadn’t returned home yet, and (Y/n) had a few words to say to him.
It was around 2 AM when Katsuki returned home.
He closed the front door quietly – a complete difference from the slam hours ago. (Y/n) sat in the kitchen, pouring a glass of milk. She was nervous to see him, to get the truth of what happened. He was taking his time removing his shoes in the genkan, and it made every second feel like years. She forgot she even poured herself a glass of milk, as she stared at the entryway.
Katsuki appeared at the door of the kitchen, and his gaze immediately locked onto (Y/n). He looked a little distracted but otherwise fine. It wasn’t until he stepped further into the kitchen that she realized he was drunk.
He looked down at the untouched glass of milk in front of (Y/n).
“You spilled some,” he muttered. (Y/n) glanced down, noticing that she did indeed spill some milk on the counter when she was pouring it.
“I’ll get it,” she replied, looking back up at Katsuki. “Do you need water?”
Katsuki scoffed but smiled. “No.”
She thought she might as well confront him directly. Her resentment was teeming, “Why’d you hurt Izuku?”
The befuddled, faraway stare that Katsuki held hardened a little when she said that. He almost felt guilty. He swallowed, the alcohol loosening his lips more than he liked.
“He pissed me off,” he gave a slight shrug of the shoulder. Careless but honest.
Katsuki was always honest but never careless. (Y/n) decided then that she didn’t like this side of Katsuki. Her stomach felt tight.
“So, if I ever piss you off, you’ll do the same to me?” She snapped.
Katsuki shook his head, scowling at the ridiculousness of her question. He still stood in the doorway, almost caging her in, and (Y/n) noticed just how small she really was to them, to this big house. They stared at each other. Katsuki blinked then sighed, walking over to the fridge. (Y/n) was acutely aware of his movements, like she was locked in a room with a starving lion that circled her. The lion hadn’t pounced yet, but she could feel it in her bones that he was still eager to attack.
He shrugged, reaching for a beer from the bottom shelf – in the way back of the fridge.
“Guess not,” was his answer.
That wasn’t good enough for (Y/n), but she knew not to press the issue right now, not while he’s like this.
He popped open the beer bottle, threw away the cap, and plodded to the living room. She heard him collapse on the couch with a sigh.
(Y/n) stayed away from him for a while.
#bakugou katsuki x reader#katsuki bakugou x reader#midoriya izuku x reader#midoriya x reader#izuku midoriya x reader#izuku x reader#midoriya izuku#izuku midoriya#katsuki bakugou#bakugou katsuki#bkdk x reader#reader x bakudeku#mha x reader#tto
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Transcript below the cut:
Atlas: I’m going out for a run. Asher: ‘kay. Atlas: Looks like the taco stand is open today. I can bring back lunch. Asher: ‘kay.
Atlas: Are you sure you’re alright? Asher: Yeah. I’m fine, I promise, I’m just tired. Atlas: Hm.
[Knock at the door]
Atlas: For the record, I don’t believe you. But I can wait til you’re ready to talk.
Atlas: Hey Lex. Lex: Where is he? Atlas: On the couch. I think he needs you. Lex: I’m on it.
Lex: Baaabe, you look so sad. Asher: I am sad. Lex: Are you really watching Lost Dog’s Journey Home right now? Asher: What? It’s my comfort movie.
Asher: What are you doing? Lex: I am curing your sadness with cuddles. Asher: Feels more like you’re crushing me. Lex: Well, in the words of my comfort movie, [in her best old lady voice] “It has to hurt if it’s to heal.”
Asher: [small chuckle] I don’t think this is what she meant. Lex: It could be. You laughed. Asher: … Lex: Do you want me to move? Asher: … No. Lex: Didn’t think so.
Lex: I’m sorry about Jasper. Asher: Thanks. Me too. Lex: Congrats on getting married, though. That’s exciting. Asher: Yeah, I’m really happy. Lex: Wow. Convincing.
Asher: I am! I just… [groans in frustration] I feel weird. Lex: Alright. Sit up. Talk to me.
Lex: Now, what do you mean “weird”?
Asher: I don’t know. It’s like… when we went to Selvadorada… it feels like the world we left is not the same world we came home to. I know it sounds crazy, but I don’t know how else to explain it. Everything looks and feels and even smells different.
Lex: To be fair, when you came home, you’d lost a dog and gained a husband. You’re starting a new chapter in your life. Things are bound to feel a little different. Off even.
Asher: I guess. And it’s not just those things. We’re giving our notice at work on Monday, and we’re gonna start looking for a new apartment. New career, new home, all of which are things that I want, things I even suggested, but I can’t get myself to be happy or even excited. I just feel…
Lex: Overwhelmed? Asher: Maybe. And, as if that isn’t enough, there’s something else. Lex: There’s more? Babe, no wonder you’re paralyzed on this couch. You need to slow down. Asher: That doesn’t feel like an option. Lex: Of course it is. Asher: …
Lex: Okay, well, look, everyone is coming to my place tomorrow. You should come. Hang out with friends and take your mind off things for a bit. Asher: I don’t know. I feel like I’d be such a downer. I don’t want everyone to see me like this. Lex: Maybe it will boost your mood. You might even have fun. Asher: …
Lex: Just stop by. You don’t have to stay long if you don’t want, but at least come say hello. Asher: … Lex: Please? Asher: [nods] Okay. You’re right. It might be good to see some friendly faces, get out of my head for a bit.
Lex: That’s the spirit! Asher: Ahhh [laughs] What the hell?! Lex: I love you.
Asher: Love you too. Now get off me please. Lex: Only if you let me pick a movie for us. Asher: Fine. Atlas is bringing home tacos. Should I have him grab you some? Lex: Obviously!
#ts4#ts4 simblr#ts4 story#sims 4#sims 4 storytelling#the goode life#sims 4 challenge#starsignchallenge#starsignlegacychallenge#gen1 aries#aries pt5#atlas goode#asher goode#lex mcphee
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It's Everything - Jake Lockley
Jake + First Date + Haunted Corn Maze
Fall Fluff Masterlist | Jake Masterlist | Main Masterlist
Word Count: 684 || for @blablabiblejesusmagic and @howellatme
Jake Lockley's been driving the van for the retirement home you work at for the last few months
He's so mysterious and dashing, always sporting a leather jacket, black dress shoes and trousers, a flat cap
and the most interesting sexy facial hair. He changes it up - sometimes it's a beard or a mustache or realllllly hot stubble
The little old ladies adore him. He helps them in and out of the van with a kiss on the hand.
The men love to tell him long stories. He listens to them like they are the most interesting people in the world
So there are many reasons you became slightly smitten
You accompany the senior adults on many outings like the movies or to a concert. Today is a fall festival.
Jake's only job is to drive the van there and back, but he ends up walking around with everyone, helping out, while the seniors shop for antiques and crafts, eat a snack and listen to live music.
That's when the two of you notice the corn maze. Definitely not an activity for the seniors but Jake nods toward it.
"Do you own boots?"
You lift your booted foot, turning it this way and that.
"You're not scared of a little mud, are you?"
"Jake, we cannot take them in there, you know that."
"Maybe we could come back another time. Like tomorrow night?" His dark eyebrows arch curiously.
You point to yourself, mouthing, "Me?"
"Yeah, you." He winks.
So that's how you end up on a date with Jake, at a corn maze.
"I didn't think people liked to do corn mazes at night."
"They do if it's a haunted corn maze."
At the maze entrance, there's a creepy looking clown selling a variety of glow-in-the-dark items to illuminate the maze and make it more fun.
Jake buys you a glowing headband and multicolored flashlight. You feel like a kid again.
"How do I look?" You twirl around once after fixing your headband in place.
"Glowing."
The two of you enter the maze, brandishing your neon gadgets to ward off anything too spooky.
"No one's gonna jump out and grab me, are they?" You whisper, huddling next to him.
"Not if they wanna keep their arms," he quite seriously assures you, taking the opportunity to pull you close.
After enduring more than enough jump scares, you realize you might actually be lost.
"Please tell me you know the way out of here. I haven't been paying attention," you confess, shining your light this way and that.
Jake has finally released his hold on you as the two of you try one path after another.
For some reason you get the giggles and start laughing every time you hit a dead end.
"If we get stuck in here, I'm going to blind you with this flashlight," you warn, brandishing it like a weapon.
"Good luck with that," he cockily teases, holding up his own flashlight and making a whooshing lightsaber-type sound.
This leads to a quick duel, and you're thrilled to learn that the suave, sexy Jake is actually as big of a nerd as you are, at least in some respects.
"Come on, I think we're close to the entrance," he encourages, boldly taking your hand to lead you along.
"There's no way you know where we are," you tease. "You just want to hold my hand."
"Accurate." He grins. "Well, this anyway." He brings your fingers to his lips and steals a kiss.
You turn another corner and realize you're at the exit.
"Jake, we did it!" You cheer, throwing your arms around him in celebration.
It feels good to hug him. To hold his hand. To be close. To have his undivided attention.
"I thought you were just nice to everyone," you admit as you stroll along near the food trucks. "I didn't think you liked me as much as..."
You trail off, realizing what you just blurted out.
"I knew it." He winks. "It's the mustache, right?"
You breathlessly laugh, leaning in to kiss his cheek. "It's everything."
Fall Fluff Masterlist || Jake Masterlist || Main Masterlist
#fall fluff ficlets#jake lockley#jake lockely x reader#prompt: first date#prompt: corn maze#fall fluff#fluff prompts#moon knight
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#talked to my credit union about pre-approval for an auto loan. im gonna frow up#tldr; i just started a new job after completely depleting my savings over the last couple months#and my fucking car has decided that NOW is the time it wants to begin its death throws after 17 years & 190k miles#so rather than wait for the engine to explode on the highway or something i'm spending money i don't have#(many thousands of dollars that i will need to borrow. specifically. 🤢)#to shell out for a newer & hopefully more reliable car before winter hits. and then i'm just gonna pray my new income can cover it!!!!!#on one hand i'm excited cuz it'll be the first car i've ever owned that wasn't a shitty hand-me-down with over 150k on it already#and i am absolutely drooooooling over the one i'm gonna test drive tomorrow#but on the other hand. it feels very precarious to take on this amount of debt right now and i'm FREAKING THE FUCK OUT.#i was worrying this morning tha ri was rushing into things and maybe it would be better to try to hold off for a couple months#but then i had to use my own car for work today instead of a fleet vehicle and the engine started displaying Silly Behaviors*#(*RPMs doing whatever they feel like randomly & a noticeable Clunk whenever i'd shift gears)#and since this thing has already cost like 1k in two emergency mechanic trips in the last two months#i feel justified in my decision to just take the L and hope nobody will look at it too closely when assessing its trade-in value 😔#ctxt#money talk cw
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New Employee aquired today
My manager: Hey Grace maybe you can show NE some things, but don't overwhelm her
Me:
Me: so like. make sure it's not a repeat of my first day???
#like maam ive worked here for barely a month you know this#and my first ever shift was 8 hours and CLOSING#i did a lil bit of everything my first day why do you think im so adaptable to what you need now???#anyways i had NE help shred chicken cause we needed more and then i couldnt even use it bc we were out of the salad kit 🙃#today twas a long day#i was supposed to do subs but literally worked on salads all day cause we were so short staffed#a coworker who YESTERDAY asked for a shift today never showed up. our manager had to open and was barely through salads when i got there#(3 hours after open)#me and manager tackled customer service and did as many tasks as we could (specifically distress and make salads)#(i learned how to do temps)#morning cook stayed late WITHOUT TAKING A BREAK to bring back some stuff we needed#closing cook got sick and left when me and NE did leaving i assume 2 store managers (maybe just 1) and one coworker to close#we so short staffed they had a job fair JUST FOR OUR DEPARTMENT.#anywho#ive also been up technically since 1-2am. i got extra 1 hour between then and 5:30am before i had to get up. i went to bed at 9pm#so. ive been tired all day but since i dont have work tomorrow im gonna stay up late and chill#amber's shit you can ignore
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I should be writing my thesis but Im feeling so lazy
#personal#i managed to get some sleep so thats good#but it still feels like yesterday's super hot super humid weather seeped any and All possible energy out of me#and I can barely think straight today#its cooler today at least#but its also raining outside so the humidity and grayness is also not doing me favors#so Im thinking#maybe I should just take this day for myself#I do have to do some cooking#for dinner and to prep the tofu so it doesn’t go bad#I have a recipe I wanna try and tbh whenever I do a lot of 'brain work' before in the day I have zero energy to cook#so this might be a good day try making a new thing#spend some time playing cyberpunk and stocking up on some good feels#I plan to go to the grocery store too (in the rain ughh) to grab smth sweet for my dad for tomorrow#cause I forgot to buy it yesterday when I was in town#oh and then there's the game in the afternoon!#our boy's playing in the vnl and its always nice to watch them play with the fam#so yeah#maybe today is for charging the batteries#and then tomorrow Im gonna push to write as much as I can in one day#hopefully this plan will work and not backfire on me 🙈🙈
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So yeah avoiding my phone didn't work and also meant I sat on the kitchen floor staring into space for about 3 hours before Alfie woke up but hey at least I didn't break anything
Them being around is helping a little but they're also struggling and it fuckin sucks bc I know we're both just. Rotating money stress in our minds
#like. i went out earlier to get bread#just bread bc we cant afford anything else#got just enough in the bank to cover the work thing but since management stjll hasnt gotten back to me on HOW to pay it its like#our electricity is already in debt lol it has a thing where you can go £10 into debt before it switches off#and it usually wont switch off over weekends#presumably bc all but 1 places nearby thst we can top it up at are shut on weekends but anyway#so we're like. okay. it MIGHT last today and if it does thst SHOULD mean itll last till monday.#but then itll be at least a tenner in debt#then we only have to last till thursday but its. do we keep this money thats for The Thing that is once again unclear on how urgent it is#or do we spend it on the Soon To Be Immdiately Urgent thing#and thats not even CONSIDERING food lmao we. i got 2 loaves of bread so we can at least survive on toast for a few days#we got 3 maybe 4 meals worth of stuff still in the kitchen#like...at this point i dont even care if i have to go a few days without eating at all to make it to thursday but its.#its so fucked up those are the terms im thinking in#and this isnt asking for more donations i really cannot take that today im at the fuckin bottom of my barrel#and already feel hopeless and useless and an active drain to everything around me#but its. like. how. why. why is it still like this. why is it looking extremely unlikely its ever gonna change.#whats the point if its all for a few scattered handful hours of actual peace and comfort never mind happiness#tldr yes i am once again suicidal but small s#like in the sense of i would feel immense relief if a truck came at me on my way to work tomorrow and would not step out of the way but#dont have it in me to actually consciously act upon
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I have decided that this upcoming week and a half are going to be extremely not "banana bread at work dude hell yeah"
#between 3 exams accounting for 50% of my grade in my class#returning not only to work after 10 days off but returning to see the manager who caused my mind to fully mentally break#and now also the 3rd thing#I'm just spent and i dunno how I'm gonna keep moving#i picked up a second job in a funeral home too#have to go shopping for clothes after work tomorrow but it can't be too late cuz i have to come home to let the dog out#i have to do the same quickly on tuesday after work before rushing back in the direction of work#where my school is#so i maybe get... an hour of time to cram before exam#i need to order propane#i need to fix my car#i need to take care of my lawn and house#i need to grocery shop#typing it all out helps#i think I'm gonna grocery shop today#though the thought of food makes me feel really sick right now#whatever I'll feel fine by like friday probably
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i finally got my adhd med dosage worked out and also for like the first time since upping the dosage actually managed to take it consistently long enough for it to actually kick in over the last few weeks and god damn. that shit is magic.
#im on the non-stimulant version bc the stimulant ones were too up-and-down for me#so they kinda act like how ssri meds do in terms of slow buildup#but now that I'm there its!!! insane!!!#I've been falling asleep just when I'm tired which I just am totally unable to do normally#I woke up before my alarm today and was like maybe I'll take a shower!! in the MORNING! as soon as I woke up!!!!#and left on time for my appointment w time to spare - then instead of going home after having accomplished the one (1) task for the day#i voluntarily just went and did MORE things. like. for FUN. and didnt have to force myself and be like 'you'll enjoy it once you're there'#then I finished doing fun things at the river with the dog and was like. yknow what? I'm gonna be productive and work on the car.#and I DID. then hung out and socialized and watched a movie after?#at this point this is 4 WHOLE THINGS in one day????? and it wasnt prescheduled and I did it all because I just felt like it#I am fucking astounded. I am going to do everything possible to make sure I don't fall off meds again bc like. this shit is lifechanging#as long as I'm not physically too tired I'm actually looking forward to doing more tomorrow too#like. god damn. not having to force myself to do things that logically I know I enjoy and just being able to DO them is insane#I'm gonna go to the weekly farmers market next week and pick up veggies. and then make something with them.#⭐✨magic✨⭐
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🫠
#i dont wanna go to work today#last night was so uncomfortable and seeing whos working tonight i can sense itll be the same issue again#ans not to mention i have to sit NEXT to the guy please 😭#tbh id rather stay home and work on this other project thats stressing me out instead but 🙃🙃🙃#if i call out sick that also means i cant cover for my friend tomorrow bc i told him id be happy to#but now im uncomfortable it sucks#vent#like. im. fine. safe. but my coworkers were saying really misogynistic comments that i was just pissed off and burned out#that plus racial comments as well so i was just very pissed off till point of exhaustion#it wasnt to ME#But also as someone who is afab and considers herself a girl that shit was uncomfortable#but anyways.#i wanna call off work today just to avoid that#i was so excited yesterday bc it was mostly all the coworkers i really like and then One Guy ruined the entire atmosphere#to a point it was super noticeable i was really exhausted and my friend said he'd take over for me instead#same guy who i was gonna cover#hes honestly so nice. maybe too nice lmao#it started as a good shift before i wanted to start punching things but eheh#whatever i need to work on auditons
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It’s seem like I can’t escape the “people don’t want to come to work so now I gotta do their mess” shenanigans…
#literally the most two irksome work pet peeves happen today and I was pissed#1st is waiting until the last second to do or change something#2nd is people who call out for a bs reason and how I gotta do your work unprepared#I work with adult learning and online webinars stuff like that#I’m like a producer I set the webinars up and I’m supposed to moderate them intro the speakers etc#and they are live events with people attending online#why two days before the event the ceo was like I don’t like the platform let’s change it…#plus some others problems they had…#why are we discussing two days before????? we had all month to discuss changes or concerns#okay there’s major problems with the event so I gotta fix some stuff and now it’s on me#to research a new platform they want this done asap#I’m annoyed cause why is this urgency my issue?#this should have proper discussed way before we rolled out the product#THEN during that this girl in my team was basically like I’m taking off so now you have to take over my event#outta nowhere…#I gotta do the rehearsal tomorrow and I know nothing about the event…#like you have been planning this event for months and all the sudden you gotta be off…#you have been complaining that’s low attendance and it’s probably gonna fail I hate#YOU just don’t wanna do it!!!#it’s like a random classmate coming up to you and saying#you gotta do my presentation now I’m gonna be out#and not send any notes or details or nothing…#don’t know why you wouldn’t show up to your own presentation besides an emergency#which apparently they knew about it last week but tells me at the last second being vague about it#maybe it’s kiosk trauma but I can just sense the bs#like not even gonna send some sub plans or anything???#that’s nutty!!!#anyway got hit with a double whammy I was so mad#but I will calm down and deal lol#callyie chat
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played 8 consecutive hours of elden ring this afternoon/evening and forgot to eat dinner.... 🫠
#oops#well i still have bad cramps and bloating so maybe its for the best. im too tired to eat now#i feel soooo terrible. i dont think its from the gaming tho i was playing to distract myself from feeling terrible in the first place#but no such luck. well its better than spending all day ruminating anyway#i need to do laundry and food shop tomorrow and ill take the day off ER entirely otherwise ill end up playing another 8 hrs 💀#i got my meds today too but im not gonna start them until my period fucking starts and ends bc i cant handle both at once#plus itll be good if i can start them later this week so if it fucks my sleep at least i wont have to go into work multiple days in a row#while exhausted etc. mannn.#i really really hope i sleep better tonight this whole last week its been so disturbed and im so tired :-(#and so saaaaaad. and lonely but not really in a way that being around ppl helps.. i just want a longass hug 💔#ive done so well this week mentally but it takes so much out of me staying on top of it#anyway.. to bed to bed to bed#.diaries
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tomorrow is my last day of having to do work for my classes and I’m just soooo ready for this upcoming break. I wanna write for an entire day at a time again and learn how to crotchet without putting so many expectations to be perfect the first time again!!!! I wanna paint and play my switch and just lay down without feeling guilty!!!!! I need it!!!!!!!
#I still have to respond back to discussion board posts after tomorrow 🙄#but at least I wont have to do actual work after next week!!!!!#I wanna be free!!!!!!#also tips for learning crotchet would be greatly APPRECIATED#bc I don’t get how to do any of it 😔#anyway lemme take my ass to bed#I have a quiz (or maybe two I’m still not sure)#and a paper and presentation and db to do tomorrow and I really don’t wanna#I know it’s gonna be light work but it’s gonna be time consuming which is what I loathe#like omg it took me FOUR FUCKIN HOURS to do ONE project today#I was mad as hell#it wasn’t even necessarily difficult to do just SO TIME CONSUMING#gimme my time back so I can nap on the couch in front of the fire place damnit#okay enough ranting gn!!!!!#—in store chit chat! 🍫
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Guess whos potentially working a triple tomorrow?????????
Im going to transform into my final form if this shit keeps up i swear to god.
#summerly talks#im just. gonna have to tell my boss that. effective immediately. i cant work the weekend anymore#sad because its good money#but this is becoming a fucking pattern and if it does i may actually dive into a fission reactor while singing meltdown ;_;#like. i was okay with the double? my coworker called in because her baby was sick#and she promised me if i couldnt get anyone to cover for my am shift tomorrow she would take it#then at like 9pm i get a text saying. she cant. her baby wont let her leave#and i feel selfish because. she has a baby. but i have cats and luckily i was able to drop by today to pick up my sleepover kit#and also make sure minty had food. (fieldie has an auto feeder so hes okay)#and i just. want to go home#the reality is i cant. i cant go. not unless one of the people i texted gets back to me saying theyll come in#and no one has yet. its 11pm. no one will at this point.#im tired im tired im tired#i dont want to end up like i did at my ladt job. giving away entirely too much of me and destroying myself#ive already lost most if not all of my passion for this job#and when i was younger i dreamt of working with disabled people. i burnt too quick and now im a shell of what i was#but this is the only thing im trained for that would allow me to like. keep my home#maybe if or when i move to brisbane i can look into a different job. do an it course idk. something where there's less people skills needed#i better try to get some sleep orz tonights gonna be a bitch of a thing
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yes i’ve been playing b.g3 all day and yes i still haven’t entered the city. i like to take my time asdgj
#finally got astarion’s approval to exceptional and halsin propositioned me so it’s been interesting to say the least ASDF#i think i’m just about ready to leave rivington though! but i’ll wait to do that until tomorrow considering i played for a long time :’ )#treating today as a recovery day so i think i’ll work on icons and watch a lil movie#maybe fixate on bg3 things… really do need to figure out rin’s verse properly and do a lil write up#and maybe edit chiyo’s a bit hmm#we’ll see but as i said i’m gonna relax and take it easy and i hope everyone is having an easy day too 💜#get ready to ramble | ooc
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deleted my twitter app (not account) bc i really can’t handle the intense no-nuance high-stakes takes right now. not that here is all that much better but it’s definitely less of a time sink
#i just.#ok.#i just think if ur gonna go scorched earth on prioritizing high minded ideals over outcomes ur not actually as morally pure as u think u r#and I also think if ur gonna do that u gotta say with ur CHEST the collateral damage you’ll sign onto#both by abstaining from concrete action now and by destroying infrastructure in the name of a brighter future#im not even gonna tell you ur wrong. but i want you to say who u think is worth sacrificing#i have awful news for you the folks who don’t make it thru the revolution are very rarely the rich and healthy and connected#it’s gonna be folks who are desperate enough to fight and folks who can’t handle more instability.#poor folks. sick folks. disabled folks. disenfranchised folks. unhoused folks.#you think you can build a functioning mutual aid network from scratch during a revolution serving tens of millions?#i know it’s a nice thought that the failures of US welfare programs are Just Capitalism. and that’s a huge chunk#but it’s also because IT IS DIFFICULT. and that’s WITH billions of dollars and a chokehold on the global supply chain#im not saying any of the options are good. but when u call for revolution u gotta acknowledge ur stealing from today for tomorrow#and look hard at the folks who stand to lose the most. say you’re fine with martyring them - whether or not they agree#I’ve got myself all worked up now and i wanna post about it. to maybe share some god damn perspective.#things are bad! things are not good. unsustainable trends abound. but wow for all ur whining online#about how everyone needs to know EVERYTHING about ALL ISSUES in EVERY CONFLICT or else you are EVIL#ur missing the forest for the trees my dude. takes are easy - policy is hard#get fucked. don’t get people killed.
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