#gonna brag

[lethby]

HEAR ME OUT

So MC specializes in summoning and protective magic right? Cause they asked Solomon and natural talent, respectively.

Then one day, MC is with Solomon and he asks them to bring him something. But then they raise their hand and the object just comes floating to him. And he is SO proud cause like??? His little apprentice learned telekinesis??? On their own??? And pretty good???

And he starts singing praises with a stupid smile on his face and MC just smiles and thanks him cause it's really not that weird for him to get excited at their magic.

Then another day they do the same thing, but before the object flies through the air, he catches them mumble something about "Spirit of Wind" during the incantation. He's kinda confused and he asks them.

"Wait what do you mean wind?"

"What?"

"Just now, didn't you use telekinesis?"

"You didn't teach me telekinesis"

AND NOW HE IS EVEN MORE PROUD??? Cause what do you mean you're using the wind??? Do you know how much control over pressure, force and direction you need to do that??? He bets it's even harder than normal telekinesis???

Meanwhile MC stands there a little confused before Solomon's bewildered expression turns into a laugh as he goes to hug them.

"I really do have the most amazing apprentice in the world huh?"

[wuthering-tempest]

dads and the pet they didnt want

[omo321]

[val-of-the-north]

Apocalyptically bad first impression

[weirdglassthing]

Youll never guess what I started!!

While watching the first episode I forced myself to figure out how to draw rett and it paid off look at him!!

Avantris singlehandedly forcing me to learn how to draw men

Silhouettes because they look shockingly baddass, Barbie pyke because Jesus do not leave his hair unrendered, and the sketch because I find it funny

[marce-mallow]

Ben: Brooklynn? Didn’t you die?

Brooklynn: That was weeks ago, dude. Things change.

[saintjosie]

i’m not humble bragging when i say im pretty and passing. i’m hot as fuck.

when i brag, i brag with my whole chest, and i don’t do it often. so let me brag for a minute.

i am an excellent photographer and i worked in professional photography and videography for almost a decade and have traveled all around the world to do so. left image taken in milan, right image taken in thailand.

i hold one of the top scores on rush pinball on record. 25th in the world last i checked and i got this score five months after picking up pinball.

i try new hobbies all the time and almost always pick them up at an insane speed. on the left, first time painting since high school on the right, first acrylic pour.

after two weeks learning archery, i shot a regulation 140, better than many hobbyists do after shooting for years. image taken from my first day of shooting and shooting at full range.

i’ve dabbled in makeup art. this was after three weeks of learning how to do eye shadow.

i can sing, play guitar, bass, piano, drums, can improvise on all of them except piano and i write, produce, mix, and master all of my own music. i started learning music production four years ago from online videos and have 100s of thousands of streams and am working on a full album. this was my spotify wrapped for 2023.

other miscellaneous things

i have a masters degree

i learned how to lockpick in seven minutes

i’ve been world top 500 demon hunter in diablo 3 multiple times

i cleared slay the spire on my first run

i have cleared every song on guitar hero 2 and 3 on expert 100% (yes even through the fire and flames), and could clear more than half of them either blindfolded, left-handed, or both. (not anymore tho lol)

i taught myself how to cook, i make up my own recipes frequently, i can improvise recipes using whatever is lying around, i can guess how to make a recipe without looking it up, and many people have told me that my cooking is the best thing they’ve ever eaten.

i took a data science bootcamp and then worked at a fortune 500 tech company for several years and i also turned down job offers from google twice.

strangers regularly come up to me and tell me i’m unrealistically gorgeous and that i have the best skin they’ve ever seen.

i’ve turned down several men in the mainstream music industry who tried to slide into my dms

oh and i can dance at bars, have a good time, AND look sexy while doing it.

so like 🤷‍♀️

[efverse]

the next day fairy type evolution headache is too real😔

[xx-sketchy-xx]

I can’t sell it, but I sure as heck can spread the word! I got this from a shirt about Sesame Street at Walmart. 👌 I knew I could make it better xD

the alt versions I made were an attempt at png, but I sadly don’t know how to make it work. Lol

I apologize :) at least you know I tried ❤️

maybe their is some way of editing it out 🥲

[weregonnabecoolbeans]

It is going to be very weird and interesting to see bucky without his emotional support captain americas

[tazernatic]

hii!! i love your artstyle, have you drawn the twinyards before? consider this an aftgtober prompt if you want :P

Aaron had always wondered why Andrew bothered to sign with Wymack's ragtag team. Not for his own benefit, surely, since Andrew claimed education was a waste of time and Exy almost as tedious. How rude, that a few words from Dobson could put so much into perspective.

prev | next

[fury161]

wings of mouthwash scribbles

[raddestrose]

I unfortunately AM Shen Qingqiu/ Yuan, cause I am OBLIVIOUS to when people like me

[underatedwords]

nah im so excited for them to play carrot in a box. watching lando try to work out whether carlos is bluffing or not?! carlos trying to persuade lando to swap or not!? im predicting a lot of teasing, a lot of eye contact...

[kandavers]

Deja vu by Olivia Rodrigo could be about yuri tbh

[velvet-games]

ficlet inspired by this post @theautotrophic made. it ended spiraling into something very different lol but it's still kind of the same idea? I just needed to explain why vox joins the hotel in my universe.

“Ugh! How is this still happening?” Charlie moaned, turning off the TV. “I don’t think we can make any progress if we don’t start creating our own news coverage.”

“What was that?” Alastor stepped closer to the couch she and Vaggie were slumped on, suddenly curious. 

“It’s Vox. He’s making almost every channel about how much of a failure the hotel is – even though we just proved redemption is possible – and I think it’s actually gaining a lot of traction.” Charlie sighed. “It’s just … I thought everything would get better after we saved the day and my dad could help out, you know? But we’re still fighting just to get people to give us a chance.”

Vaggie put a hand on Charlie’s shoulder. “Hey, it’s okay. We’re the ones with actual proof. I’m sure if we make our own announcement–”

“Wait! Alastor, you made that commercial last time, right?”

“Oh, uh, about that, Charlie–”

“You can make more to counter Vox’s stuff. Hey, and you were friends with him at some point too, right? So you know how to deal with him–”

“Charlie.” Vaggie spun Charlie around to face her. “Sorry. It’s just …”

“Vaggie made a deal with me so that I would never have to work with those picture boxes again,” Alastor finished cheerfully. 

Vaggie visibly deflated in shame. “Uh, yeah, something like that,” she mumbled. “I’m sorry.” Her expression became even more miserable as Charlie seemed to deflate too.

“Oh,” Charlie said. “Well, maybe you could–”

“But!” Alastor interjected, holding up a finger. He was far above drawing any attention to the Vees unprovoked, but this was about as good of an excuse as any. “The purpose of the deal was to prevent me from having any obligation to use the medium for producing entertainment. I would be happy to … take care of the interference from Vox.”

“Great!” Charlie’s eyes shone for one perfectly naive second before her face twisted in suspicion. “Wait … what are you gonna do?”

“Oh, just mess with his wires a little; nothing extreme, dear.”

—

A loud BOOM shook the building as Vaggie failed for the third time to get the TV to turn on. She sighed. “Goddammit.” None of the TVs were working, the Vees’ website had crashed, and Alastor had been gone for the last 24 hours. Vaggie could almost see the expression of horror on Charlie’s face when she found out Alastor had absolutely done more than “mess with his wires a little.” Vaggie rushed to the window, and yep. There it was: a giant red deer demon with shadow tentacles shooting out of it as a much smaller blue smudge darted around with trails of electricity following it. She sighed again. “Charlie? Come down; Alastor’s being an asshole again.”

—

“And I had a great idea for a new show that was gonna air today too!” Vox narrowly dodged another hit from Alastor’s shadows. 

“Another new show? My dear, you really are proving just how much you’re throwing rocks at the wall in the hopes that they’ll miraculously stick.” Alastor turned as Vox appeared behind him in a shower of sparks. “And was it really your idea? Or did you just have your little unpaid underlings come up with it for you?” 

“Fuck you!”

“Oh, I think we’re far past that possibility, darling.” Alastor chuckled, finally managing to grab Vox before he could jump into another streetlamp. “What was the idea? Another reality dating show with manufactured drama? Really, is anything you produce even remotely original nowadays?” The shadow tendril threw Vox into a nearby building. What remained of the terrified pedestrians scattered like ants as Vox fell, several bricks going with him. “What a pity. You used to at least come up with half-decent stories, even if the endings were always laughable.”

Vox groaned, trying to hold several shards of his broken screen in place. “N-No one cares. No one fucking cares what you think; I’m the one who built the empire. You have like, three listeners on that ancient radio show.”

“And each one of them has told me how much they like it, that it’s their favorite, even!” Alastor leaned down. “Would anyone watch you without the hypnosis, without other people’s hard work masquerading as your own?” He smirked. “Would anyone love you without manipulation?”

That last part caused Vox to look up, teeth bared. Several wires shot out of the building behind him and attached themselves to his head, lifting him up to be at eye level with Alastor. “Would anyone love you without manipulation?” Alastor kept smiling despite the surge of electricity that hit him; he quickly batted Vox out of the air, cutting off the attack. 

“I’ll have you know that nearly everyone who meets me adores me, whether they admit it or not,” Alastor replied smoothly. “Including you.”

Vox was on his knees, wires falling as he coughed up what became a puddle of blood. It was always startling how red it was, despite the mechanical nature of most of his body. “Yeah, have a fucking laugh.” His voice became quiet, muffled by static. “Have a fucking laugh about the fact that I loved you and you threw me away like a box of scraps.” He sniffed, standing up shakily and wiping a trail of red from his mouth. “Well, I’m the one with all the influence now, aren’t I? I’m the one with an actual team. You were fading even before you left; I bet you really did ask an angel for help, just to stay fucking relevant. Most of the other overlords aren’t scared of you anymore, and they’ll fucking kill you when none of them are.” 

Alastor narrowed his eyes. “You loved me? Is that why you ran away with that moth to make ‘entertainment’ even you won’t watch?” He started shrinking to his usual size, stepping forward. 

Vox scrambled back, one hand generating a few weak sparks. “Val loves me.”

“Valentino knows you’ll gnaw on any affection you get like a starving dog with a soup bone.” Alastor pushed Vox to the ground again, reaching down to wrap his fingers around Vox’s throat. The sparks in his hand died. “He knows you’re too selfish to make a real connection with anyone.”

Tears welled in Vox’s eyes, round and filling up nearly all of what was left of his screen. “I-I still love you,” he managed to choke out quietly. 

Alastor tightened his grip. “You love money. And I was stupid enough to care for you before I realized that.” Vox’s eyes managed to get even bigger as he started to really choke. “But you’re just dirt underneath my feet, and I’ll kill you every day that I have left here so you remember that.” Alastor just watched Vox’s face for a moment, then pulled out a small knife with his other hand. “Actually, you know what? I have angelic steel with me. I think I’ll just finish you here.” He drove the blade into Vox's side before he could respond, prompting a pained, strangled sound. It wouldn’t kill him quickly. He’d feel it for hours as he bled out if no one helped him. 

“Alastor!” a shrill voice called. He turned to see Charlie’s panicked face, her chest jumping with labored breaths as she stumbled to a stop. “Stop! Stop; I’m sure he’s had enough.”

Alastor stood up, giving one last petty kick to Vox’s leg. He put on an upbeat tune. “Hm, alright. I was just about getting bored with him anyway. How about we go get lunch at that new place around the corner? I’m absolutely starved!”

“I–” Charlie blinked. “No, Alastor, he–” She looked around his shoulder, flinching when she saw the state Vox was in. “Shouldn’t we help him?” she whispered. 

“And whyever would we do that?” 

“Well, I mean …” Charlie started, then appeared to brighten a little. “Actually. I have an idea.” She straightened her shoulders, putting on her “aggressively-kindly” face and voice. “As princess of Hell, I command you to leave the Vees and come help with the hotel. And make up with Alastor.” She glanced at Alastor apologetically before mumbling quickly, “onlyifyouwanttothoughyoudon’thavetodoanythingyou’renotcomfortablewith.” 

Vox blinked, managing to look unimpressed despite bleeding profusely and only having a quarter of his original face visible between all the cracks and glitching. “I would literally rather kill myself.”

Charlie blushed all the way to her ears. “O-Oh.” 

Alastor just burst out laughing, making a show of spinning his cane as he stepped closer to Vox. “Well, old friend,” he said, lifting a heeled boot above Vox’s chest and pressing down. “I’m sure that won’t be necessary if you refuse our help.” Vox sputtered a little as Alastor continued to push. “How about this: Lucifer can heal your wound, and you take a temporary break from working with the Vees, just long enough to help us create a presentation for the angels.” He let his gums show with a smirk that probably contained enough smugness to kill a horse. “And I would love to have you for dinner the night you leave. Is that a deal?”

Vox immediately blushed despite clearly being too lightheaded from blood loss to fully understand what Alastor was saying. “You bastard” – Alastor pressed harder – “Fine! Fine, yes. It’s a deal justliftyourfootholyshitfuck–”

“Wonderful!” Alastor lifted his boot, leaving Vox coughing and bending over on his side. “Now. you two have fun; I’m afraid I need another visit to the tailor,” he said. He brushed off his lapels and straightened his cuffs. “Oh, and Vox? It wasn’t angelic steel; I just think desperation suits you.”

Alastor was gone before the cries of indignant surprise assaulted his ears.