#gonna be limited but i have other stuff to add first so i will try and get more in ....

[turboemmy]

hehe.. surprise ! 🍔

[waywardsalt]

mmm

[thezombieprostitute]

The Sweater Incident

A/N: Written for @the-slumberparty's December Daze Challenge.

Prompt: mistaking an elegant holiday fete for an ugly christmas sweater party

A/N2: Reader is female. No other physical descriptors used.

Warnings: Angst, Lots of angst. Let me know if I missed any!

"I still can't believe your parents are hosting an ugly sweater party," you chirp at Ransom.

"Me either," Ransom tells you. "Normally they do that whole fancy schmancy thing."

"Huh. I wonder if they're trying to be 'cool' or 'normal' or whatever."

"Possible," Ransom shrugs.

"And thanks, again, for letting me do the shopping for it. I picked a few couples sweaters that I think you'll like."

"It's not a problem," he smiles at you. "I know you always find the best sweaters. Just look at my closet."

You giggle as he holds you close and kisses your forehead. "Now pick out your favorites for this thing."

After looking them over a few times Ransom finally settles on the couples sweaters that say "I Come in Peace" and "I'm Peace". You can't say your surprised he went with the most tawdry of sweaters. It's gonna be a great way to get his family riled up.

You realize what's going on a few seconds too late. Ransom walked you in with an arm around your shoulder and his trademark shit-eating grin. The first few people you see are his parents and his cousin Meg, all dressed immaculately.

Linda's jaw drops and she immediately starts yelling at the two of you, mainly you.

"Richard! Look at this!" she screeches, jamming her finger at you. "Do you see what this degenerate is doing our son?!"

She turns to Ransom, "how did she convince you to do this? I know she's gotten you into pulling pranks! Is that what this is?"

Richard starts joining Linda in the screaming and yelling but you don't hear any of their actual words. Tears are clouding your vision and you're having trouble breathing. You run back out the front door and the sobs start coming.

You hear Ransom calling after you but you just keep moving. When he catches up to you, he grabs your arm and you try to pull away.

"What the hell? What's wrong?" he yells.

"You tricked me! You embarrassed me! You---" your crying cuts you off.

"I thought you loved pulling pranks," he rebuts. "You always say we're partners in crime with this stuff."

"Exactly, Ransom! PARTNERS! If you'd asked me to do this with you, of course I would have, but you decided to pull this prank on me as well as your family!"

"I thought you'd get the joke!"

"I get the joke on your family, but not on me!" you scream at him.

"Oh, so I'm never supposed to pull a prank on you?" he argues.

"You can do that, of course, just not ones that embarrass me in front of your family! I've already got the worst relationship with them that this is just...it feels cruel."

That makes him stop in his tracks. You know Ransom doesn't always understand the limits so, between sobs, you try to explain.

"Your family already hates me, Ran. But we both know that and so when we're in on a prank together, it's like I've got someone at my side against the unstoppable rampage that is your family's disdain for me. When you do something like this, it adds to their perception of me and it's no longer me and you against them. It's you and them against me."

Ransom blinks a few times, unsure of how to proceed. You step away from him and pull out your phone to get an Uber home.

Back at your shared apartment, you're curled up on the couch, wearing what Ransom had dubbed "your angry hoodie". It was an oversized hoodie that you could curl yourself up into, pull on the drawstrings, and shut out the world. You've stopped crying, but you're still, understandably, miserable so you don't hear Ransom entering with several bags. It's not until you catch the scent of your favorite takeout food that you perk up and start hearing Ransom. But you're still so angry and hurt you're not leaving the security of the angry hoodie.

Ransom recognizes what you're wearing and respects your desire to not be touched or talked to. Instead he moves the coffee table over to the couch and starts setting up a veritable buffet of your favorite foods. You hear him open up a can and you're pretty sure it's a can of your favorite soda. He sits on the opposite side of the couch and turns on the TV, selecting one of your comfort shows to start playing.

You wait for him to say something but Ransom continues to respect the rules of the angry hoodie and doesn't say a damn thing. Even as the food gets cold and the drink gets lukewarm.

You open the hood just enough to let yourself see him on the couch. He looks chagrined. You can tell he hasn't been able to sit still, fidgeting every second he's been on the couch, but he's staying silent with his hand to his mouth, like he's thinking.

You open up the hood a little more, "I'm not gonna forgive you so easily."

"Wouldn't expect you too," he admits. "But at least I can start trying to make amends."

You nod and adjust the hoodie just enough that you can start dishing yourself up some of the food. Sure enough, everything on the coffee table is one of your favorites. An assortment of all the different restaurants and food types that you love. You enjoy your food and the show Ransom selected, sitting for a long while before you realize Ransom hasn't eaten anything yet.

"Are you going to eat?"

"I got this for you. Not gonna eat it without permission."

"Thank you," you nod, opening the hoodie up a bit more. "You may eat." Wordlessly he makes himself up a plate.

It takes a few more episodes of your comfort show for you remove the hood, indicating you're ready to hear Ransom out.

"I know I fucked up," Ransom says. "And, thanks to your explanation, I know how I fucked up. I can't undo what I did, but, again thanks to you, I know that there are things I can do to make amends. Starting with promising you that I'll never do anything like it ever again. You're the last person in the world that I ever wanted to hurt and I'm genuinely very sorry about this whole thing."

You sniffle a little, remembering the burning embarrassment you'd felt. "I'll accept your apology, but you've still got a lot of amends to make."

"I understand," he nods.

"For now, I'm going to congratulate you on handling your first real emotional fight as part of a couple. Specifically for not running away. You came back, you faced me, while respecting my rules, and I appreciate that." You see Ransom's shoulders significantly relax at that. "And as soon as you're done eating, you're giving me a foot rub."

He huffs, "anything for you."

Tagging:

@alicedopey; @delicatebarness; @icefrozendeadlyqueen; @irishhappiness;

@lokislady82; @ronearoundblindly; @thiquefunlover63

[ganondoodle]

( totk rant?)

i have talked alot about my problems with totk in detail, as most of you probably know by now- but there really is a vibe of big ambitions but then not committing to it throughout the game

they want to have that building mechanic in it no matter what in a world that isnt in any way build around it, mister "freedom = good, linear = bad" guy wanting to give you ultimate freedom in the game (which imo leads to it being nothing again) but not committing to it and it creates a really toxic loop of things being more punishing than rewarding

you can build a fuckton of weird vehicles, but big parts, ESPECIALLY the glider, is on limited time so you cant actually go anywhere you want; they know giving you absolut freedom will remove any possible challenge- so they limit it by making the glider part timed, but then they cant do that for every single part bc it would be almost impossible to create anything that works well when every part is on a timer and you dont know how much of its lifespan is left bc you accidentally hit a fan once so now its uneven with the other one AND the more parts you have the more it uses battery, it makes sense, so you cant build soemthign super overpowered right at the start and its just kinda logical, but it leads to you being incentivised to build something with the fewest parts that dont have a timer-

then theres the battery power, which they try to limit by putting its upgrades behind multiple different currency exchanges, which is frustrating and leads to alot of grinding and gets overpowered really fast (it works against itself too that said currencies are all placed in the most undeveleoped and repetetive area of the game and are all never involved in anything interesting, its reused old enemy camps and the same mines everywhere, theres not a single reward in the underground that actually feels rewarding imo)

then you get the autobuild thing, so you can skip the building part of the building mechanic that is the main selling point of tha darn game, bc they know it can get frustrating to rebuild your things over and over so they give you a skip button for that if you are one of those players that doesnt like it BUT THEN they cant jsut let you do it for free so they give it a price, either spend the same currency you need for the exchange for the one you need for battery upgrades or spend parts you collected- both of which are things players generally save up and refuse to use (like the -never use any health potions bc what if i need it more at some point- thing is a problem for a reason)

then theres the added thing of the building stuff despawning incredibly quickly, im gonna guess its otherwise a performance problem (that the game is already struggling hard with) but it makes the entire already bad loop of trying to fix a problem with bandaids over and over even worse, you dont want to go too far away from your vehicles bc it will despawn and waste all that you used to build it, its like a leash to you stopping you from actually using it for more freedom- and potentially adds another annyoance bc you might try to bring it with you as far as you can, a monster truck in the depths you spend all your parts on gets stuck on the first bits of terrain you run into and you desperately try to get it out without destroying it, and if you cant you need to spend a ton of resources to build it again, even with autobuild

which is how you get the hoverbike, stupidly overpowered and boring but doing anything else is just less efficient in every way, it uses the least amount of battery, never breaks, is only 3 parts to rebuild

(i know me in particular doesnt enjoy the building in totk at all, for all those reasons and more ...... shiekah ........ and i know you CAN still choose to doing it more creatively, but you never need to, its entirely based around YOU making it fun for yourself, and i dont think its that controverisal to say a game should be fun and challenging without you having to create all the fun yourself and set yourself limit it all yourself)

similar goes for the dungeons, they heard you want the dungeons of old times back, but their strict adherance to freedom (which they themsleves contradict) leads to them being more breakable and less dungeony than even the titans in botw, they cant make it linear, thats BAD, so you can do any puzzle in any order, it cant build on any of the others bc you need to be able to do it when you want (the only one going slightly against that is the lightning one? maybe?), totks dungeons dont even limit that you cant climb them (even the titans in botw recognized that makign it easy to break so they are made of the same unclimbable material like the shrines and other shiekah tech) and the new abilities make them laughably easy to break ( .. im not even gonna mention the water temple one bc ... you dont even need to do anything there to break it to make it easier)

they wanted to cater to people wanting old dungeons, but didnt commit to it, making them WORSE dungeons than the titans with the only bonus being they got different designs and a longer build up to it (that often feels more like artificial filler than actually part of it ... like the missing lore tablet at the zoras and the missing part is a few steps away from it at best)

(ALL THE WHILE they DO limit you in SHRINES, you cant climb the walls again, for some reason, you can climb any other sonau structure though, why not that? idk, but dont limit it enough either bc you can break it all in really cheap and unsatisfying ways with ultrahand and time reversal alone- and they CANT limit those bc those abilities are the main ways to solve the 'puzzles'- botws abilities were .. well, limited in what they could do making them much more balanced, but moving sth with ultrahand and then stepping on it and time reversing it can be the boring solution to any 'puzzle', the best and only really good shrines are the ones that take all you shit bc it wactually forces you to be creative BC ITS LIMITING YOU)

(funnily enough a big possible reason why they removed the bombs from botw is bc of the glitches with it ...... like the new stuff isnt even worse and you dont even have to try lol)

people speculated on there being underground exploration due to the first trailer? people are worried about reusing the surface? ok they put the entirety of the surface map into the game again, but dont commit to it being a full thing, its horribly underdeveloped and filled with either nothing or reused filler material, while also neglecting changing anything substantial about the surface, and then the sky isalnds they even reduced and really there isnt anything of substance on there either besides the tutorial (hey, seriously, if one of botws most defining feature is its wide and empty sky why the hell would you decide to use that same map to put in your sky islands idea in), not commiting to one idea but doing all of them badly

ganondorf? well, they sure put him in there, but really what does he do? fuck all, the entire actual game hes jsut marinating in his own miasma juice for no reason, he doesnt have any presecne in the game, all he gets its a few scenes in the "story" that are told through memory cutscenes in a stupidly mega distant past i dont give a fuck about and all he does is go through the most stereotypical villain checklist of both actions and speech, they want ganondorf in there but dont commit to him ACTUALLY being there (listen i love ganondorf but really calamtiy ganon was more interesting than totk ganondorf ok im SORRY they did him so dirty)

they want dragon zelda and link 'losing' his arm be a big epic sacrifice but then .. again, dont commit to it, they tell you its oooh so irreversible and whatever and then at the end just fukcing reverse it, with no build up at all, and NONE of your own input, it just happens, and its not JUST zelda but also links arm, reversing it BOTH even and you dont even need to have all shrines (that are supposedly to cleanse your arm of miasma, i guess thats a non problem if you just stab the source of it to death instead)

they want it to be a sequel but also its own game, not committing to either and leaving us with this weird .... more alternative universe thing, vague references to botw but also acting like it never happened, slight changes, like zeldas hair, to make her seem different when shes exactly the same (you cant imply waifu zelda would ever age and not look like a little doll) and ignoring anything about her character from botw (no im serious, ooh shes nerdy for 3 minutes at the start and one time in a written thing from some servant of da royals in the past and thats it, interest in the shiekah? whos shiekah?- if anything her character is reversed, really having even less agency than in botw, that one decision to dragon is like, it really doesnt matter and not really her decision bc she didnt have a choice and it gets reversed anyway without her even remembering)

even retreading all of botws points (but doing it worse imo), but then attempting to differentiate itself from it by removing a big thing that made it what it is (shiekah) without giving it any or any sensible explanation among more, not committing to either sequel or AU and so doing both incredibly badly

(not quite the point but what i have been questioning for a while ... they way raurus abilities work ... so do all sonau have those? was it just a normal thing to have? could all sonau just glue shit together and jump through ceilings? he never uses anything of that when we see him? why is it just in the shrines at the start and its like .. he just gives it to you ...?? huh??is it part of his arm .. jewelry??)

(anyway, tin foil hat moment but it just feels like either there was a huge internal fight about everything or they neglected it in favor for something else, like say, a movie that earns them billions and is faster and cheaper to make than a game... or just dont care anymore i guess, idk which is worse tbh)

[your-unfriendlyghost]

I have two things to ask:

1.-Can we be friends?

2.-Do you have any Outsiders headcanons (or any that you haven't submitted yet)?

I mean sure?? Idk who you are since you’re on anon, so not REALLY, but I’m always down to talk!

2. Yeah lol- tons. Too many. Here’s a few (okay like 25 oops) off the top of my head lol, some serious/angsty and some lighthearted/kinda stupid without any real order. (Lotta ‘em are about Steve tbh -there’s so little to him in canon that I have the freedom to hc pretty much whatever I want)

Steve Randle’s nearsighted and has no idea, which is why he’s literally always squinting. (I’ve had that one for like months but only recently mentioned it on here lol.) Steve thinks his vision is completely normal

Dally and Sylvia genuinely cared for each other, but they were both so horrible at having healthy emotions that they just made each other worse. In a bad way, not a fun way.

When Steve gets kicked out, sometimes he hangs with Johnny in the lot. They don’t really talk about anything important like their shared experiences of having lousy parents. Instead they talk about cars, girls, music, school…lighthearted stuff. Sometimes Johnny will find Steve crying, which he never mentions- he’ll just sit down as per usual, which Steve appreciates. Steve almost never finds Johnny crying though. Johnny doesn’t cry much.

Okay tangent- I love how Steve and Johnny are low-key foils. Like Steve always seems tough but then cries when pushed to his limit, while Johnny always seems skittish until he’s under a bunch of pressure- in which case he suddenly is confident. (Not necessarily thriving obviously, but confident yk? Like grinning while saving those kids in the fire.) I know SE Hinton probably didn’t intend that at all, but it’s just such an interesting detail to me. One of these days I’ll put it into words better

Johnny’s jeans-jacket is a hand-me-down from either Steve or Two-Bit. (I can’t decide which lol) (obviously Dally would make sense too, but honestly I think it’d add more depth to flesh out Johnny’s relationships with the other members of the gang)

After the events of the book, Two-Bit starts hanging around the Curtis’s place even more. At first the gang assumes he’s trying to lighten the mood. It’s only after he gets sent to the cooler for a month due to drunk driving that they realize he was actually hanging around so much because he was trying to keep his kid sister from seeing him so drunk…

Two-Bit likes to joke that he keeps failing junior year so that him and his sister can graduate together. Which is a very bad idea since his sister is a year younger than Ponyboy.

Sodapop often feels like he’s only good for looking pretty and not all that useful or interesting otherwise. He likes himself, but when he stops to think about it too much, he starts to wonder if he really has anything going for him at all

My H/C for Steve’s home life is that his Mom is sick w/ like cancer or something. Before she got sick, Steve’s life was pretty alright for an eastsider- he and his dad fought, but they always made up for the most part. They weren’t perfect, but they loved each other. But after she got sick, she wasn’t there to mediate between Steve and his Dad anymore, and the fighting got worse and worse. And then Steve’s dad started drinking more and it was pretty downhill from there. Steve’s Dad still loves him, but sometimes Steve wishes that he didn’t. If he didn’t, then he could hate him. But his dad does love him, so he can’t get himself to.

Steve and Dally taught Johnny to drive when they were all like fourteen-fifteen-ish. Johnny is a very reckless driver. He loves speeding.

Johnny also loves fast roller coasters and stuff.

Dally doesn't ‘cuz he’s low-key scared of heights- he likes riding broncos and rodeos, but put him at the top of a roller coaster and he’s convinced that it’s gonna break and he’s gonna die. He pretends he doesn’t mind. The only people who know he’s scared of them are Johnny, and before she died, Mrs. Curtis.

Steve has a napoleon complex. Johnny, who is shorter than him by a few inches, likes to bully him for it sometimes

Ponyboy and Cherry don’t interact much in the school year after the book, but in the summer after, they start to hang out. Eventually they become pretty close. They fangirl over Paul Newman together

Ponyboy still doesn’t let Cherry read his theme though until years later

Marcia and Two-Bit re-meet a few months after the book. (Two-Bit is really scared that she’s embarrassed to be dating him, and Marcia is really scared that he’s embarrassed to be dating her. Neither of them are embarrassed. They both adore each other.)

Two-Bit likes to watch Marcia barrel racing. One time while he’s there, he runs into Ponyboy watching Cherry barrel race and immediately tells everyone much to Pony’s chagrin

Evie knows a little bit about cars, and she sometimes helps out at the DX during summers. Steve is so whipped for her lol (and Soda too Steve has two hands)

Evie and Sylvia are besties, but Steve and Sylvia hate each other. They act civil in front of Evie, but as soon as her back is turned they’re growling at each other like dogs. (Well Steve is. Sylvia just acts condescending as hell. Sometimes it goes over his head, so Steve knows she’s insulting him but isn’t sure what the insult is/means. Which makes Steve kinda want to kill her.)

Steve and Soda are low-key co-dependent. (Steve more so- Soda has his family at least, while to Steve, Soda and Evie are his whole world pretty much) It’s probably not super healthy, and both of them are vaguely aware of that, but are trying not to think about it too hard rn

Ponyboy’s friend group in high school consists of Curly Shepard, Mark Jennings, Scout Jenkins (from the tv show), and eventually, in her senior year, Cherry Valance. (There’s others too but those are the main ones.)

Pony dates Cathy Carlson for a while too, idk if they’re good for each other or not- I kinda like the idea of them being a sweet couple tbh, but no one else on here seems to care about them so I haven’t really explored the idea much lol

In a Dally lives au, Mark Jennings and Dally end up spending a bit of time together through Pony, and at some point they realize that they’re half-brothers lol. Mark is a deeply obnoxious little brother to have, and he drives Dally nuts on purpose. Weirdly I think Dally’s a relatively good influence on him, as much as someone like Dally can be. And Dally does care for Mark, though not as much as he cares for Johnny- Mark is, in his head, not exactly his responsibility.

Well I have (so many) more, but I think that’s enough for now lol. Point is, even though I haven’t drawn in a minute, I love these characters and their romanticized version of 1960s Tulsa so much and I think about them way too often lol

(dw once i get more into the swing of school I’ll be doin more art!)

[yurislotusgarden]

Hii! could I request ranpo and chuuya with a fem s/o who makes cute bento boxes for their lunch at work? (I was curious on how this would go, feel free to add any details you want!)

My bento!

ʚїɞ Separately! Nakahara Chuuya, Ranpo Edogawa, Sigma x F!Reader

ʚїɞ Keep in mind English is not my first language, so you may find mistakes!

ʚїɞ word count: 1764 (Chuuya - 537, Ranpo - 664, Sigma - 561)

ʚїɞ Have Sigma as an extra bcs my ass forgot it was meant to be Ranpo instead of him after I was done with Chuuya's part

ʚїɞ Tw’s: None! Just pure fluff, pet names are used (barely), reader’s gender is not specified that much

Nakahara Chuuya!

ཐིཋྀ He loves the bentos so much, well more like the fact that you take time to make them for him

ཐིཋྀ Tries to always eat them

ཐིཋྀ Once, when you started making them, he didn’t eat the food because he was so busy that day, and when he had a little free time, Chuuya decided it was a better idea to go on a stress smoke break (He tries to limit smoking to the minimum he can if you don’t like smoking/the fact that he does it. He knows it’s because you care about his health)

ཐིཋྀ It ended with you fussing over him eating almost nothing that day and he doesn’t like causing you stress or making you worry so he makes sure to eat those bentos😭

ཐིཋྀ He may be an executive but this man is not embarrassed at all to eat those bentos in front of people, no matter how colorful or cutesy the food looks

ཐིཋྀ Food is food, he’s not gonna not eat cause you to worry just because the bento is one that doesn’t look like someone like him would eat

///////////////

“Lad, may I ask where do you get those bentos from?”

It was a long time since Kouyou noticed Chuuya’s bentos, and she tried to ignore just how much she wanted to try one. The only reason why she didn’t is because she doesn’t know where he is getting them from.

The young woman looked at many shops in Yokohama and saw a few places with similar bentos, but it was easy to see that none of the stores were the ones where Chuuya kept getting his lunch from.

…She really wanted one for herself, especially with how obvious it was that they were delicious, kept quiet about it tho.

Chuuya turned towards the older woman, whom he came to see as an older sister over the years.

“They’re not bought from a shop.”

“You don’t buy them?”

“Not a single one of them. Actually,-”

Kouyou was confused. Where did he get a bento from every single day? She knows the younger of the two probably wouldn’t bother spending his free time making food for lunch definitely a day before, even if he did, it wouldn’t be so colorful or detailed. There were even rice balls decorated as bears and stuff, it obviously took time to make one. But if he wasn’t buying them,  then the only other option that came to her mind was-

“- [Name] makes them for me.”

“She does?”

“Yeah, and she’s yet to make one I dislike.”

It all makes sense now to the red-haired woman. You have more free time most of the time compared to Chuuya, and you were probably aware of the eating habits he had before.

The fact that you take time, quite a lot it seems if Kouyou was to guess, the bentos are even detailed, in a very cute style if she was to say, made a smile appear on her face.

“Mhm, you wanna try?”

“How could I refuse such an offer?”

The food was even better than she thought. Kouyou made a mental note to ask you if you would have a problem with making two bentos from time to time.

Edogawa Ranpo!

ཐིཋྀ Another reason as to why he’s dating you -you give extra homemade sweets to the Bentos-

ཐིཋྀ He doesn’t even need to try to remember to eat it because he ends up eating it before lunch anyway -the reason behind you making more than one bento usually-

ཐིཋྀ He fucking boasts to everyone about the food😭

ཐིཋྀ “See what I have here? HAHA! Something you don’t and probably never will!” ← totally not Ranpo to anyone else -and totally not him to Dazai and Atsushi about the fact that they will probably never have homemade food like him-

ཐིཋྀ Don’t make the bentos with him in the kitchen unless you have prepared double the amount of food you plan to use. He uses any opportunity to snack on the not-ready-yet bentos

ཐིཋྀ BUT! He will share with you if he notices you’re hungry or just generally wanna eat it <3

///////////////

“C’mon give me just a little piece!”

“Nope! [Name] made it for me! Make your own if you want a bento at work, Yosano-san!”

“I can’t make such a bento Ranpo-san!”

“Not my problem!”

With a pout, the brunette turned his chair away, trying to eat his food in peace. It’s one of his favorite bentos! You put his favorites in this one! The only thing he doesn’t like in it is the veggies which Ranpo would ignore or throw out but he knows that he won’t get his favorite candy made by you anytime soon if he does (the others will snitch if he throws them out, especially Dazai and Yosano they did that the one and only time he did so. He learned a lesson from that after you didn’t cook his favorite like you said you would that morning)

Ranpo could practically feel the eye-roll done by Yosano. “It’s not like it’s the only bento you had today.” It’s true, he ate a similar one 2 hours earlier. “Doesn’t matter. It’s my bento either way.” A sigh came from the woman.

And right when one would think his problem was solved, another arrived. 

“Ranpo-san! What an interesting bento you have there!”

“Go away Dazai. I’m not giving you a single piece of my food!”

“Oh c’mon! You can spare a little!”

“Nope! Especially not when it’s [Name]’s cooking!”

Seriously, can’t they leave him alone? He knows your cooking is good, everyone at the agency knows that! But he wishes that you’d never let Dazai taste your food. The bandaged man has horrible eating habits, you both know that, and yet he always tries to get his hands on Ranpo’s bentos. The audacity!

Ranpo could tell that Dazai's annoying mouth was about to open again before someone interrupted him.

"I can make bentos for you too if you like them so much, Dazai-san"

Isn't that his angel who came to visit him at his oh-so-tiring job? Lovely timing, if Ranpo was to say, but there was one problem.

Among ‘hello’s and ‘hi’s from others upon noticing you, gasps could be heard, from 2 men specifically.

"You would do that for me?!"

"Excuse me?!"

What is this?! There's no way that you’re gracing anyone else with the perfection that are your his bentos!

“Hm?” It’s easy to see for anyone in the room that you were confused.

“[Name]-chan, if you could be so nice, could I ask for a bento with cra-”

“No no no! Shut up Dazai! She’s not making you any bentos! In your dreams!”

In the end, while Ranpo and Dazai at first thought that you wouldn’t make the taller brunette a bento after your conversation at that moment, you indeed did as a surprise. 

The best detective in the world didn’t like that but he allowed you to after bribing him and reminding him that if you can get Dazai to eat, you will, no matter if Ranpo will allow you to make a bento for him or not.

Dazai's happy scream the next day could probably be heard throughout the whole building.

Sigma!

ཐིཋྀ He didn’t think he’d be able to adore you more than he already does, and yet you found a way to make him do so

ཐིཋྀ He tries to eat the bentos every day but it isn’t that rare that he forgets about eating altogether when faced with a mountain of paperwork or problems in the casino

ཐིཋྀ He loves how they look and taste. He, at one point, will ask if you can teach him how to cook. Like not even necessarily a bento, just to learn since he doesn’t want the kitchen to end up in flames one day, he’s aware he sucks at cooking

ཐིཋྀ He probably would be a little embarrassed by eating it. Not because of how colorful or cutesy they are, but because of the looks he gets from people who see it. 

ཐིཋྀ The stares aren’t criticizing or anything, others just don’t expect that their boss/the manager of the casino would eat food that looks like that

ཐིཋྀ Someone was probably jealous because he has homemade bentos like that and they have some store-bought sandwiches 💀

///////////////

“It’s mine actually. Sorry, I forgot to take this from here earlier.”

The man standing in front of the bar was shocked.

He’s been sitting there and drinking not too much for some time now. At one point he noticed the bartender taking out a bento from under the bar, the lid see-through enough to see the food inside. He has to say, the detail and overall look were very cute, it definitely took time to make it look so.

The man had thought that the bento was made by someone for the bartender (In his mind it was a fair thought as he didn’t think that one could buy a bento like that anywhere close to a place like this. Especially if you work there).

The slightly shorter man changed his thought upon noticing that the bartender didn’t touch the food he had taken out (later on the lunch break he took out something else to eat)

Around 2 hours after the lunch break, -the bento still untouched, he noticed- the man decided to finally ask, curiosity winning over after all the time spent at the bar seat.

“Excuse me, who is the owner of the bento? I couldn’t help but notice that it hasn’t been touched at all.”

And he really chose the worst time to ask that question didn’t he? Right as the person to whom the bento belonged to, came.

“I-It’s yours sir?”

“Yes, why?”

How is he supposed to answer? That he didn’t think that such a cute-looking bento -that if he could he would consider stealing, it looks delicious and definitely better than his sandwich- can belong to the ever so stoic and calm manager of the sky casino?

“No reason! Was just that curious, that’s all! after all, the bento was lying here for the past, almost, 3 hours by now.”

“Ah, understandable then”

The bi-colored-haired man turned to the bartender, who was already giving the box over to him.

“Thank you for keeping it here for me, Shuichi-kun”

“no problem, Sigma-san. [Name]-san also told me to tell you-”

Yeah, the man needs a break from the confusion and shock for the next week.

And Sigma? He’s just happy you leave the bentos somewhere he can take them from when you know he’s busy.

Notes, comments, and reblogs are greatly appreciated <3

Do not copy or translate my works on/to any site

[sayakxmi]

Some ideas for V3 as Remanants of Despair* under the cut, cuz it's prolly gonna be rambly.

Gonna preface it all by saying that some stuff will likely be inspired by in fact by Buttercup_ghost if not just downright borrowed, bc their takes are great (fully recomending reading the fic), but I'm also trying to add my own spin to it.

Another thing is that I like the idea of V3 Remanants being delusional/convinced they're doing the right thing. They all gave me very strong self-righteous vibes, and it's a recipe for disaster. Like, class 77 are more "burning the world down to burn it" while 79 (V3) are like "gotta burn it/purge it to make it into a better place". Like, Junko specifically used the fact that they are naive and view themselves as good people against them.

Shuichi Saihara

Ok, so first of all - SAWhara? Amazing, spectuacular, never been done before, full credit to Buttercup_ghost bc I love this idea so much. But I kinda like the idea of Despair!Saihara being some kind of a harbinger of truth if you get me. He sort of is one in the game, but there he is gentle and unwilling, but as a Despair, he has none of that kindness he's occassionally willing to give to the culprits. No secrets are safe around him, he will dig it all out to cause strife and despair. Unless, of course, you can actually overcome it. In that case, you have a chance of surviving. He probably doesn't view it as truth ruining people's lives but the lies they'd told to hide it earlier.

Also, again from Buttercup_ghost, but the idea of Junko getting to Shuichi first makes just so much sense. The two best picks are either Shuichi or Kokichi, but I feel like they also cancel each other. They're both capable of falling, but also they're both capable of standing their grounds if others fall first. The difference is that Shuichi is liked and can get Junko close to others, while Kokichi is alone and he'll always be, so getting through him first is a shot in the knee kinda, bc others won't be as trusting as they would've been if you met literally anybody else first, F. Plus, there's a chance of using that loneliness against him later to make him fall, so it makes sense that way, too.

Kaede Akamatsu

It's like semi-borrowed from in fact (it's faster to write the fic titile than the author's, so I'll be doing that from now on), but only semi bc it's something I probably would have come up to myself even without reading it, like, girl decides to take the one for the team & kill somebody, hoping the person that dies will be the one that "deseved" that/was the real enemy, and it's similar here. Some people are Evil and they need to Die.

Rantaro Amami

Something something, failing your family will get you in trouble, that's also why one of the first people he kills are his own parents. I mean, you lost 12 daughters, by now you should have found at least one, you're rich and all that, you can afford it, but apparently it's only Rantaro who cares enough to involve a detective I guess? But, yeah, abusers of all kinds are the targets, neglectful parents etc etc. You get the idea. It sounds ok in paper, but the definition of abuse in his eyes is kind of unclear, so if you beat up your kid he'll be after you, and you can also just have a nasty argument with your spouse, and then you won't have a spouse, so. And, again, the point of V3 as RoD is that they are doing what they believe to be right, but they have sekwed up perception of right and wrong and zero limits.

K1-B0

Something we kinda forget about Kiibou is that he canonically looks down on Shuichi, like, bro just tells him he saw him as beneath him in their last FTE, and only changed his mind after some time. MAN. But, anyway, Despair!Kiibou isn't trying to be perceived as like humans or anything of this sort, I mean, why would he put himself on equal grounds with some people (derogatory)? He's so much better than them! He's a robot, he's smarter, he's stronger, he simply knows best. And people better recognize that or they'll get burned to crisps. I can also see him perceiving himself as somebody who should make the law (a nod to all that lawsuit things), he kinda goes dictator mode I guess. Fuck the three laws of robotics.

Gonta Gokuhara

Straight up stealing from in fact, bc Gonta going around mercy killing people who are "least likely to survive" is peak. Also love him not considering the rest of his class his friends anymore (save for Kokichi, but we'll get to it later).

Angie Yonaga

Again, in fact, Angie believing that Junko is her god makes sense to me. Grl started a cult probably, so first half of chapter 3, but there's more blood, I guess.

Tenko Chabashira

Definitely one of the more difficult ones to turn into a Despair, but I can sorta see her misandry spiking up. My idea is kinda that since Shuichi, a degenerate male, brought Junko to them, which put Himiko and other girls in danger, she straight up blamed him for what happened, and got radicalized over time. Though, admittedly, Despair!Tenko is a subject to change if I come up with something better.

Himiko Yumeno

Chapter 2 body discovery, except she's doing it on purpose. Himiko Yumeno, Blood is Magic. Maybe she embraces the "evil witch" archetype, too. Nobody will question her status as a mage if they're dead. I like where I'm going with it, but I'm struggling to put it into words, I hope you get the idea.

Miu Iruma

I tried to think of something, and against myself I ended up kinda agreeing with in fact again, oh well. It just makes a lot of sense for her to turn into a Despair out of paranoia - get them before they get you, y'know? But it's Miu, so her ego has to be involved somehow. It's a mix, then, she's afraid of everything, but also wants the world to acknowledge her genius and hotness, so if she has to blast some people into fractions, she will.

Korekiyo Shinguji

Listen he was like 16 in the game how tf he managed to not only kill almost 100 women, but also somehow not be caught. Bro isn't exactly the definition of subtle appearance-wise. He's supcious as hell, actually. And for that reason, again, sadly, in fact went into this direction, and so am I. I told you the author's takes were great.

Ryouma Hoshi

Aaaand in fact isn't over. It was awfully simple with him - he has nothing left to lose, so Junko gets him to care about her, and he doesn't care what happens to the rest of the world.

Kirumi Toujo

I'm not 100% sure about it, but I'm kind of vibing with that backstory of hers, that she once served somebody so well that person became unable to do their job, and her opting to do just that, because everybody else is fucking incompetent compared to her, and she deserves far more appreciation. She's resentful, and she'll smile and bow politely and ruin her employers' lives from the inside, showing them they're nothing in comparison.

Tsumugi Shirogane

She's a tricky one, but I can imagine Junko making her recognize her "true potential" or something. She's likely the one who idealizes Junko the most out of everybody, and I can see it as somewhat similar to the Mikan situation, which, oof. She gives Tsumugi all the attention she could possibly ask for, while for the rest of the world she might as well not exist, and she roams it in various costumes, doing whatever she pleases and avoiding responsibility. She's similar to Impostor in a way, but I'd say their difference is that Tsumugi can copy only some general stuff, mostly visually, so she can trick people into believing she's somebody else only for a little bit, while Impostor is so good they could live somebody's life for years and nobody would question it too hard unless they and the original were literally in the same room, and also Impostor can learn their skillsets. Anyway, I think at her core Tsumugi just feels worthless, so she becomes anything else for Junko, and when she's dead, her reason for being herself is gone, too - nobody cares about some Plain Jane, so she wants to become the next Junko to feel the void something something.

Kaito Momota

I'm really entertaining the idea of him just embracing the worst parts of himself - he believes himself to be the hero, the main character, the chosen one, and he requires others to recognize that. He pulls a vigilante, probably, but, as usual in Despair!V3, his view of who is and who isn't a criminal is skewed. But it doesn't matter, because he's never wrong in his judgement. He knows best who desevres or doesn't deserve to live, and he takes all the credit for putting the ones who don't into their grave.

Maki Harukawa

And who else does Kaito take the credit from if not the Ultimate Assassin herself? Ngl, they give me the vibe of Fuyuhiko and Peko. Kaito's the hero, and Maki's his sidekick, his weapon. Her hands can never be clean, but she can use them to make the world a better place by getting rid of all the filth. And she trusts Kaito's judgement, so if he tells her to kill somebody, they'll be dead.

*Kokichi Ouma

In fact gets the credit for making me realize things can be happening in the same universe, and also that V3 can be the ones responsible for what happens to him. Kokichi isn't a Remanant, he essentially takes Chiaki's role. He is by no means his class' hope, but he sure af won't let anybody touch them (well, an attempt was made). I've mentioned by Shuichi that best options would have been either to start with him or Kokichi, and yeah. Kokichi absolutelu could become Despair under the right circumstances, anybody could, but Junko made her choice, and while it was logical, it also meant Kokichi will not fall to her. He was recognized by HPA as the Ultimate Supreme Leader for a reason. Nobody touches his people and gets away with it (whoops, she did). Bro went through a Chiaki-style execution, except he reaches his class who weren't as friendly to him as Chiaki's would've been. By which I mean they toruterd him to near death. Like, I have specifically ideas for Kiibou burning his wrists, making the hand-shaped scars resemble cuffs (punishment for all the robophobia, Kiibou doesn't need the human laws to do things for him, he can judge crimes himself), Gonta knocking him out, bc he wanted Kokichi not to be awake to experience any of that, and at some point when Kokichi looks at Shuichi, Shuichi ends up stabbing him in the eye. RIP.

In the good route, both him and Chiaki survive, btw. Very long story would be that Chiaki, Nagito and Kokichi were friends in HPA, doing some investigating on Kamukura Project and Junko, and for Reasons Nagito was suspended for a while, so he wasn't there when Junko was getting to his classmates, blah blah, Kokichi tells him to go where his classmates went (Chiaki's execution place), bc he has to go after his own to safety or sth (even tells him about DICE in case something happens to him, bc he has a Plan, but no plan is 100% cerain to be succesful), so Nagito gets there when she's still alive if barely, Kamukura arrives, Nagito gets him to help Chiaki anyway. Kokichi's execution happens some time later, and Nagito and Chiaki find out and get to him when he's already like 90% in the grave & thanks to Kamukura he survives.

Bad route has them not get to Kokichi on time, and also at some point both Nagito and Chiak die, so they're both AIs in the simulation, long story.

[mazeinthemiroh]

Hii, I was wondering if you could do a stray kids headcanon with like a foreign s/o. Of course you don't have to do it. Don't feel pressured and please take care of yourself ❤️

stray kids with a foreign s/o

genre: general, fluff

warnings: none

please like and reblog if you enjoy! feel free to request anything <3

bangchan

it doesn't make a difference to him tbh

he's just happy with the person you are and doesn't mind where you come from at all

he's technically a foreigner too so you guys relate in that way

just as he talks about his beloved australia with all his heart, he could listen to you go on forever about your home country. he wants to hear everything: what your childhood was like, what traditions you have, etc...

just loves learning about his favourite person sm :(((

lee know

you guys actually bonded over sucking at each other's languages

learning other languages is not a strong point of minho's. and when you can barely speak his language when you first met him, it was like a match made in heaven

you would think this would be an awkward affair. but not at all! you both were laughing over the situation and using the limited vocabulary you both had to joke around with each other

very cute stuff

since then, you both have taken a lot more interest in learning each other's language, and communicate very well together <3

changbin

changbin loves variety in his life and you provide that for him

he notices when he is travelling, other than relaxing and taking time to unwind, he enjoys learning about the local customs of the country his visiting

culture is something he recognises as important and will be happy to learn about yours

especially loves it when you cook or teach him how to make a traditional dish from your country!

hyunjin

i mean he doesn't care where you come from

this hopeless romantic? no way is he gonna let anything as trivial as what country you come from come in between you guys

he loves you for you

you can come from a different country. a different continent. hell, you could come from a different planet and hyunjin wouldn't care

he defends you regularly because sometimes the media aren't too keen on him being with a foreign partner. but he doesn't care. why should any of that matter?

han

he likes how open you are about your culture

wants to hear different stories from your country and learn what life is like over there

is very interested in the type of music your country provides as well as any traditional dances you may have

will beg you to teach the dances to him; he's a quick learner and will master it quite quickly most of the time!

just loves how passionate you get about your country

felix

he views learning about your culture as a very important part of being your boyfriend

he wants you to know that he appreciates your background and he's so enthusiastic about embracing your differences

will buy gifts relating to your culture

also attempts to make different cultural recipes to really get into the spirit of things. even the hard recipes he gives a try, and while he's a little worried he might ruin them, felix, of course, ends up cooking them to perfection!

seungmin

spends a lot of time trying to learn your language

he's quite studious in nature anyway, so it's not really a chore for him

he wants to learn to communicate with you in a way you're comfortable with

is the type to totally take you off by surprise though. perhaps if you don't know he's been studying hard to learn your language and he just comes out with a couple of phrases he has learnt like it's no big deal and you're just like?? when did you learn this????

jeongin

you being foreign adds a new vibrance to his life that he didn't know he needed

similar to changbin, jeongin likes variety and he likes new, different things

he feels you can teach him a lot and open his mind to a whole different culture and way of life

you inspire him so much, knowing that the life you have led to get to and settle down in south korea hasn't been an easy one for you

this is why he values you so much as his partner even more!

[lollystocks]

Therapy for the Dead and Buried, Chapter 4

Chapter three here

Masterpost here

AO3

“Patient 17-A-2, session four. Have officially designated the patient as an ‘A’ type, specifically emotion-alteration, as well as some unspecified action-at-a-distance ability. While both may fall under ‘A’ categorization, I’ve yet to see two such different abilities manifest in the same patient. Though a surprisingly wide range of atypical abilities can manifest in the blowing of my light bulb…”

“Today I want to work on exploring the capabilities of the emotion-alteration. I believe that full control is the path to dampening, and that focussing only on suppression would be… ineffective.”

“Patient has said some things in previous sessions that I find intriguing. References to events that are untrue, a strange usage of the word ‘here’ when talking about the world, and an off-hand reference to ‘they are out to get me’. While most patients are naturally suspicious of my intentions, James is unusually guarded.”

“Note to self: investigate the known limits of ‘D’ type abilities. As… sore, a subject that may be for me.”

--

“... and let the leaf float down the stream. When you are ready, exhale, then open your eyes.”

Danny did as she said, wincing a little as the bright sunshine of the office met his eyes. He cleared his throat and rubbed his hands on his knees.

“How do you feel?”

“Um. A bit more relaxed, physically? I guess some nice deep breathing for ten minutes is like, actually good for you.”

“Just physically?”

“Yeah, um. I’m not sure I’m very good at the exercise. Acknowledging the thoughts and just… letting them go down the stream. Like, if a thought comes to me, it sticks around, you know? I can picture a leaf or something drifting away from me but like, the actual thought is still in my brain. So rather than letting it drift away it sits there, and then to do the exercise right - having a new thought arrive on the stream - I try to think of what else could go on a leaf, and now I have a new thought, and they’re all piling up in my brain like a rotten leaf pile in the fall. You know?”

Doctor Bright nodded. The corners of her eyes softened a touch and the side of her mouth twitched. “I wouldn’t be too worried about how ‘good’ or ‘bad’ you are at meditation, James. This was your first attempt, and it might take some time and work for it to click with you.”

“I guess. Just feels like another responsibility, you know? Chores and grades and my job and paperwork, now I’ve got to add another thing to the list?”

“I suppose you could think of it that way, James. Our mental wellbeing is something that takes work, and sometimes doing so can infringe on other things in our life.”

“Yeah!”

Against his better judgement, Danny liked��Doctor Bright. A bit. That she often simply agreed with what he said was… well. He wasn’t exactly used to it. He craved both her approval and disapproval in equal measure, so couldn’t help himself from pushback when the opportunity arose.

“And like, I know you’re gonna say it needs to be a high priority, but everything’s high priority. I need good grades if I’m gonna have a future, I need to keep the apartment clean if I don’t wanna get evicted, I need to keep myself clean and fed so I don’t get sick, I need my job to get money to do any of the above. It’s just, like. It’s a lot. Twenty minutes a day is a lot.”

“Many teenagers find their lives to be uniquely pressured. All the responsibilities of adulthood are coming in, with all the restrictions of childhood. Many feel a sense ‘now or never’, and that their future success is totally determined by their achievement as an adolescent.”

“But it’s hard not to think that, when that’s what every adult is telling you. Like, I can know logically that it’s all bullcrap and that teachers and school admins tell you that so you get good SATs and go to a good college ‘cause then they get better funding and reputation and stuff, I know all that. And that like, plenty of people turn their lives around when they’re an adult. But in a way it is kinda true for me ‘cause I have nothing else going for me right now, Doctor Bright.”

He sat up straight and, clutching his imaginary pearls, recited, “I’m seventeen, I’ve no money and no prospects. I’m a burden on… the state? And I’m frightened.” Accent and everything.

Doctor Bright’s eyebrows raised at that. “Pride and Prejudice?”

“Yeah. My si-. Um. I used to know someone who was obsessed with it. I could probably quote you the entire film.”

“Film? I thought it was a miniseries?”

“Oh. Yeah. Anyway, yeah, I don’t have a backup plan. If I flunk out now, I have no real future. I need to do well now to go to college so I can make money and have an actual life.”

“Unfortunately, your stress is understandable. Many of your personal circumstances - poverty, emancipation - these are significant obstacles. Whereas others your age can afford to spend some time finding their feet in their adolescence, you’ve had extra responsibilities placed on you, many that your peers could never understand.”

“Wait, so you agree? That I'm screwed?”

“Not at all, James. From what I’ve seen, you are more than capable of making your way in the world. You’re smart, driven, and passionate, and I believe wholeheartedly that you can succeed. You have a future, James. You’re right in that it will be more difficult for you than for others, but you need to allow yourself some grace. The occasional mistake, or even failure, will not doom you.”

Danny didn’t answer, and took a deep interest in the decor instead. There was a strip of sealant around the doorframe that was coming off, just slightly. He wanted to rip it off all the way.

It was moments like this that really drove home that therapy with the doctor could only get him so far. The occasional mistake will not doom you.

Only last week, he’d nearly had a panic attack when he’d seen another kid surreptitiously check their phone during a surprise test. Danny hadn’t even been the one cheating, but simply being witness to it had brought on visions of bombed-out cities.

Doctor Bright already knew more about him than he was comfortable with. His lingering terror-guilt-disgust over that one potential future would not be something solved in this office.

The doctor’s voice snapped him back.

“If I may, James, I’d like to come back to what you said earlier about the leaves stacking up in your mind during the visualization. Do you often feel like that?”

Danny scoffed. “Oh, a hundred percent. It’s constantly like - you know that thing, where if someone says, ‘don’t think about penguins’, all you can do is think about penguins?”

“I’m familiar with the concept.”

“I feel like that all the time. Like there are thoughts I know I should be having, like my internal to-do list, or concentrating on the lesson, or looking at someone in their face when they’re talking to you. And then there are the thoughts I really don’t want to be having, but I’m always aware of what I’m trying not to think about, so. I think about them. And then it all stacks together and it’s like everyone talking at once, the good and the bad and the necessary, and then it’s all ‘Hey, kid, you listening?’ and someone in the real world is snapping their fingers in my face.”

“That must be stressful.”

“It is. And even though the meditation was kinda the same, it was… less, I guess? Like rather than try and push the bad thoughts down, just having them sit there visually, I don’t know. They stayed more like surface thoughts than anything deeper. Like the leaves were still there, but I was holding them in my hands rather than having them sucked in through my ears into my brain. You know?”

“That’s excellent, James. I think if you can try to find any calm moments in the day to practice this visualization, you’ll get better and better at identifying and diffusing these discrete thoughts. Not to mention the physical benefits you mentioned.”

“Okay. I’ll try.”

Danny didn’t want to get into a discussion about how there were no ‘calm moments’ in his days. But this did bring him onto something he’d been wondering about.

“Um, Doctor Bright. I gotta ask - why are you teaching me meditation? I thought we were gonna work on my ‘scary thing’, now that I know you know that I’m a, um. An Atypical.”

“Ah, I should have explained better. While anyone can benefit from meditation, there is a wealth of evidence that it is particularly useful for Atypicals who are learning how to control their abilities - especially those that are linked to their emotional state. Which, to be honest, is most of them.”

Danny felt his eyebrows furrow. “‘Linked to their emotional state,’ how?”

Barely perceptible, Doctor Bright’s eyes lit up slightly. “Here’s one example. A fytokinetic is someone with the ability to control plant matter with their mind - it’s a very broad ability type, with many manifestations. Someone with limited control over their ability - say, a young person who’s new to their powers - would likely find the plant matter around them acting in direct response to their mental state. Intense sadness could cause wilting, or feelings of self-disgust and loneliness to plant matter rotting and decaying. Bursts of joy could cause flowers to bloom.”

“So, classic X-Men stuff, right? Powers as a metaphor, ‘show don’t tell?’”

“In a way, although I encourage my patients not to equate their lives with fictional worlds and people. You, your life, and your powers are real, James. Your ability isn’t a metaphor, it’s just a fact of life.”

“A shitty one.”

“Maybe so. But it doesn’t have to be.”

“How could it not be? Say I get full control, what then? It’s hardly useful, the ability to scare people sh- witless. It’s not something I need any more, but it’s still here, making me miserable. It’s stopping me from making friends, or keeping a job. The best thing I can do with it is stop it.”

“I wish I had more answers for you, James, but I don’t. Your ability is a part of you, whether or not you like it. And you have to learn to live with it.”

“Hah. Live with it.”

“I’m sorry?”

“Nothing. Never mind. So coming back to the mental state thing - if I can better control my emotions, I can better control my abilities?”

The Doctor looked like she went to write something, then thought better of it. “That's the case for most Atypicals, yes. Especially so for those whose abilities are of the psychic type, interacting with others’ minds, as yours is. I've already seen good evidence that your own mental state influences your ability.”

“Wait, really?”

“Yes. I'm pretty attuned to identifying when my mind is being influenced by an Atypical ability, as you might imagine, but even without that, I think I would have noticed a difference. My sense of fear and unease spikes when you appear to be agitated or distrusting; it eases when you're relaxed. You may not feel that our visualization exercise was working well, but I experienced a significant drop in my fear.”

“Oh.”

In all honesty, Danny had forgotten that his Fear was continuing to influence the doctor. She certainly didn’t act afraid of him - or any of the other manifestations he experienced. Scorn. Anger. Disgust.

Danny didn’t want Doctor Bright to be scared of him. That she so readily admitted that she still was, in such a dispassionate, clinical matter-of-fact way, was kind of a bummer.

“Does that surprise you?”

“I mean, it shouldn’t. I've always… um. Just like, everything else I do in life is harder when I'm anxious, so I guess the same goes for this. So are you saying the key to managing this is to just what, be happy?”

“That's an overly simplistic way of looking at it. No one can, or should, be happy all the time. But I believe that addressing the root cause of your own fear and anxiety may be the best course of action.”

“Wait, so this is still just like, normal therapy? Talking about my feelings and not like. Doing tests? Taking samples?”

“Yes, James. My therapist practice isn't some front for Atypical coaching, it's still therapy. It's simply that effective therapy for Atypicals is necessarily holistic - better mental health leads to better control over abilities, which improves living conditions, which in turn improves mental health.”

“But there’s got to be more to it? Like, you talk like there’s a whole science to studying Atypicals. Do you not have some kind of like. Um. Lab?”

Danny was not a fan of his voice crack at the end there.

“I don’t personally believe that is necessary, James. There is already a wealth of evidence on psychic-type abilities to reference. This is talking therapy.”

“Okay. So we just, what, talk about my anxiety at school? And boom, I’m cured?”

“‘Curing’ is not a model I subscribe to, James. You are not sick. What I’m here to help you with is control. But there are other things we can do, besides addressing your mental health.” She adjusted her glasses. “I find that discussing my patients’ experience of their abilities often yields fruit in opening up new ways to control them. Would you be up for that kind of discussion?”

Dangerous territory. You’re not a fucking ‘Atypical’, Danny, you’re dead.

What if the way he described his abilities was totally unheard of for the Doctor? What would she even make of that? He didn’t know the first thing about the people he was trying to mimic.

Play it cool, play it cool. You’re a scared little mutant with one inconvenient power, in a world full of scared little mutants with inconvenient powers.

“Um. Sure? But uh, I don’t know what’s normal. Like, how do other people describe their abilities? Actually, I know nothing at all about like… typical Atypicals. If that makes sense?”

“I'd encourage you not to dwell too much on being a ‘normal’ Atypical. It is, after all, a bit of a contradiction.”

Unhelpful, Doc.

“But I want to know about Atypicals in general! So I can know what's me-weird and what's Atypical-weird. Like, when do people get their powers? How many are there? How long have they been around? How does no one know about them?”

“Let's see… ability onset is incredibly varied, with some manifesting in utero, and some not developing until well into adulthood, though those are edge-cases. It is somewhat typical for abilities to onset at puberty or during teenage years. It's very hard to estimate numbers. Recent studies put it as high as four percent of the population-”

“Four percent?!”

“-but that is skewed in multiple directions: on the one hand, many people with abilities live in secret; on the other, some abilities are so mild as to not register as much more than unusual talents or intuition. I have a colleague who thinks as many as twenty percent of Olympians may be low-level Atypicals. Atypical abilities aren't strictly binary, but scalar, and cover a wide range of power and disruption. In terms of the number of people with abilities either powerful enough to be noticeable, or to cause problems in someone's life? Maybe one in one in five hundred people?

“And as far as we're aware, there have always been Atypicals. More than one time traveler has witnessed them at the dawn of human history.”

“... time travelers?”

She smiled. “Yes, James.”

“Doesn't that cause huge issues with like, the timeline? Paradoxes, evil futures?”

“Most abilities aren't powerful enough to disrupt the universe, and have some inbuilt fail-safes. Most time travelers, for instance, can only witness the past, not influence it. And the future is nearly always mutable.”

“That's… wild, actually.”

“It's certainly fascinating. But to bring us back again: how would you feel about discussing your ability with me in more depth?”

“I mean, what is there to discuss? I don't even do anything.”

Doctor Bright set her notebook on the table. “I want you to close your eyes for a second.”

Danny did so.

“Where's a place you frequently find yourself anxious?”

“School. Especially in crowds.”

“Okay. I want you to picture yourself in school. The bell has gone, and it's the crush between lessons. Your ability is influencing those around you, making them fear and distrust you.”

“Okay.”

“Could you describe what emotions you feel? Besides anxiety?”

“Um. Is ‘fuck off’ an emotion?”

He heard Doctor Bright let out a slight huff, as if amused. “I daresay it is. Describe it to me.”

“Like I want everyone out of my personal space, and the more they get in my face, the worse it gets, until I want to fucking bite anything that comes near my face.”

“How does this feeling move around you? Does it come from an outside source, or from within you, projected outwards?”

“Oh, the second one, for sure. Like I want a gust of wind to push everyone around me away from me.”

“If this feeling were visible, what would it look like? A gas, a liquid? Is it slow, fast-?”

“It's green. Toxic green.”

“Okay. I now want you to picture yourself alone, somewhere you feel calm. It can be a real place, or imaginary. Think about what it looks like. Imagine the sounds, if there are any. Think about your body in the space - are you sitting, standing, lying down? Think about the temperature, the smells…”

Easy. The roof of the observatory, on a clear night - he imagined it clearer than possible, really, in Amity. The Milky Way stretched thick and dense overhead, the constellations large and proud. The air was cool and fresh, a slight breeze blowing through his hair. He wasn’t sure what color it should be.

As Doctor Bright talked, it became more real, more solid. Her voice started to fade into the background, and his awareness of the office started to dull. He tried to lean into that fact, and not let it scare him.

The concrete sloped under where he was sitting, to the gutter below him. Small weeds and flowers grew from it, and moths flittered about, attracted to his soft glow.

Doctor Bright invited him to imagine a loved one, someone he felt safe with. He couldn’t pick one, so now Sam, Tucker and Jazz all sat with him, pressing on either side.

He couldn’t remember how they should smell. But he could remember that Sam’s perfume always reminded him of smoke.

A lone car rumbled by. An owl called.

His chest was a gaping wound, draining slick, green sludge down his front. It moved of its own accord, fingers rising and falling, surging outwards. He didn’t move, simply watching as it crawled down his stomach and up across his shoulders, grabbing and dragging itself across the others. They recoiled, sounds of dismay from their mouths and they scrabbled to escape, and the Danny of this vision didn’t move, didn’t even watch.

The ectoplasm became more violent, faster, pushing its fingers into their eyes, their mouths, stifling their screams. Tucker clawed backwards in fear, getting ever-closer to the edge, losing his balance, falling-

The vision froze. Danny held onto his friend, arresting his fall, fixing him in place. He started ripping the ectoplasm away from him, digging his real fingers into his mouth and pulling, and pulling, on and on.

He had to change the ectoplasm. Change how it looked.

It was red. No. Pink. Something between the two. And it was oily, and slick, and watery and moved according to his whim, not on its own accord. It was what held Tucker in place.

It was warm, and sweet-smelling, and giddy, and fascinating.

He turned to look at Sam and Jazz. Both were smiling, the glowing red-pink oil dripping from their bared teeth, their eyes pinned open-

Danny wrenched himself back to the office with open eyes and a gasp. “Doc, I’m not sure what-”

The Doctor was staring at him.

Her eyes were wide open, round as balls, and her pupils were totally blown. She leaned forward, way too far, but her body seemed relaxed. She breathed deep and even.

Danny stood up and stepped away from the couch. “Um. Doc? Doctor Bright? What are you doing…?”

Her posture didn’t change, but her eyes followed him, and she continued to take deep breaths. Her lips parted slightly.

“Doc, fucking, snap out of it. Doctor Bright? What are you…”

She started him down, totally entranced. The corners of her lips started to turn upwards.

Then she whispered, almost undetectable.

“Danny…”

Next thing he knew, Danny had thrown his untouched glass of water right in her face.

She spluttered and recoiled, taking in her bearings. Her eyes returned to normal.

“What. Where…?” Her eyes landed on him. “James…?”

Danny gripped his hair. “Doc, what the fuck was that? You were, I mean, it was totally freaking me out, I didn’t know what to do, oh my god you're soaked I’m so sorry, what was that?”

“James, calm down, I need you to calm-”

“What did you do? What did I do?! I’ve never done that before! Was that me? You called me- shit do you remember? Do you remember any of that? Shit.”

“James, please calm down-”

But Danny didn’t hear the rest. He ignored the receptionist, Sarah’s stunned cry (and she was also gasping, clutching her heart) as he slammed through the office door, and was halfway home before he remembered to breathe.

---

The Inbox of ‘James Jackson’

To: James Jackson

Subject: Checking In

Hello James,

Just wanted to check that you were okay and safe after our session - I could not get through to your phone.

I want to reassure you than Sarah and I are perfectly fine, and I cannot discern any noticeable ongoing side effects from the hypnosis.

While I have no memory of the experience, I know it must have been distressing for you.

I want to apologize for putting you in that position. I did not anticipate that the exploration exercise would yield such an extreme result.

Please let me know you’re okay.

Best wishes,

Dr. Joan Bright, PsyD, ABPP

Licensed Therapist

---

The Inbox of Joan Bright

To: Joan Bright

Subject: RE: Checking In

Hi Dr Bright. I’m safe. I’m really sorry about earlier. I don’t know what happened.

Sent from my iPhone

---

The Inbox of ‘James Jackson’

To: James Jackson

Subject: RE: RE: Checking In

Hello James,

I am glad to hear it. I want to reassure you we are still on for next week. If you want an emergency session in the interim, I would be happy to oblige.

Best wishes,

Dr. Joan Bright, PsyD, ABPP

Licensed Therapist

---

To: James Jackson

Subject: Are you okay?

Hello James,

I am concerned that I have not heard from you since last week. I look forward to seeing you tomorrow.

Best wishes,

Dr. Joan Bright, PsyD, ABPP

Licensed Therapist

---

To: James Jackson

Subject: RE: Are you okay?

Hello James,

I am following up on your missed appointment today. I am obliged to inform the school, but I do not want to do so yet, given your situation. Please let me know you’re alright.

Best wishes,

Dr. Joan Bright, PsyD, ABPP

Licensed Therapist

---

The Inbox of Caleb Michaels

To: Caleb Michaels

Subject: RE: Referred Patient

Hello Caleb,

I did not get a chance to discuss this with your classmate in our last session. However, I am worried, as he has not been responding to my emails, though I know he has continued to attend school.

I was going to suggest that you two begin some e-correspondence, so you could both talk without being affected by your respective abilities. I cannot share his details without his permission, so you might have to make contact in person.

Please bear in mind, he’s flighty. But I know he could do with a friend or two.

Best wishes,

Dr. Joan Bright, PsyD, ABPP

Licensed Therapist

[unwri-ten]

i just looked at your site for comms and i'm like this 'cause it got me scared of you [/POS /POS] ↓

[i'm being so serious, how do you do the whole making a site thing-]

HI HIII OUBSDFJNFSD- Don't be intimidated!!! I don't bite <333 But yeah, omg sites and stuff- !! Really intimidating when you start out I totally get it, BUTT It's not that difficult once you get the hang of it, 'cause from my experience, that slump mostly comes from just not knowing what to put and the overloady junk ykyk? But anyways, Yeah! I can talk about some things I learned while developing a portfolio website/landing page

First would be what you want to use it for! For this whole thing I'm just gonna use Weebly and Carrd as samples because they're both free. ANYWAYS, I use two websites for two things, first is a directory that includes almost all the links to my stuff, and the second is my actual main website as a portfolio and professional place to showcase my work to clients and potential employers. The directory is pretty simple since it's just a compilations to links, Carrd is pretty easy to use so I'd recommend this one if you just need one place to put your socials, commission info, and etc.

I put everything in sections and since I mostly use all of this for work in general, I showcase my work status and my website first and foremost!

Andd all of this is just links to stuff that might be important, I'd also recommend having navigation buttons on each page that helps with loading back to other part of your website, (beloww)

and as for my main site, it's a lot more complicated and I'm already babbling way too much in one post so I'll try to condense it pretty quick. Visuals can come later! Focus on what content you want to put in the site first. Usually it's sanctioned into three things: Your Portfolio/shop, a showcase for the services that you offer, and an about-me (I got inspiration from other sites like local brands and their shop websites and art portfolios) (oh and TOS is important too if you're an artist!)

You can of course add and not-add anything you please but that's the generalized gist of it and what worked for me personally. Once you know what to put then you can build up the website bit by bit, I'd recommend weebly for heavier sites like that because not only is it free but unlike carrd, it has no 'element limit'. the only drawback is a footer that advertises weebly on your website, and to me that's not that bad of a con really LOLOL some tips: *I'd recommend putting your best work forward than -all- of your work in a portfolio/gallery. Find what best showcases your talent, quality over quantity! *Find other portfolios/websites that align to what you're looking for, most artists you know prolly have their websites too so it's a good starting point to find inspiration on what to put! *and for actually learning how to use carrd and weebly's interfaces, its a WHOLLEEE other conversation I can't really divulge in without going on a ramble-bam sooo if you have any questions, i dont mind dms! I'd love to help :)) I think advertising and marketing yourself is really important (sometimes even moreso because yk how it is with art as a business), and I already went through the nittygritty of learning this all by myself so I'd love to help anyone that needs it, o7!!!! Hope this helps!!

[stone4stonerocks]

So! You're stone, great!! Welcome!!!! But oh fuck, how do you meet other stone people?? Tumblr seems like the only place we're all hanging out at, but everyone here is too pussy to message each other and also, for some reason it's physically impossible to meet anyone within a 20 mile radius of where you live. The goddamned distances. Here's where I come in!

You can call me Cupid because I think that's cute. I'm a stone bottom who's femme4butch and desperately single and partially making this for myself but honestly idc as long as it gets some lesbians a gf/head. Whatever tickles your fancy.

Here's how it works!! You send me an ask a la on our backs personals, I post it, people either respond to you directly or if I feel like it and I see someone who's exactly your type who you're perfectly suited for, maybe I'll message you both with whatever they sent me and recommend chatting.

Send me an ask with the following criteria:

*Your age

*what you're looking for (hinge rules, just say whether you're looking for long-term, short-term, flirting, hookups, or friends)

*A brief physical description of yourself or some pictures, a picrew even will suffice

*Where you live (disclaimer, obviously don't give me your full address, but a general vicinity. I.e. I live in New York, I'm comfortable saying queens specifically, but I'd say New York City if I felt otherwise)

*your sexual preferences (again, you don't have to go in detail but for convenience sake please mention whether you're a stone top, or a stone bottom, your hard limits, and if you have any other preferences (being called daddy, liking bondage, enjoying getting head on occasion, not wanting to be touched on the chest, etc etc)

*your username on tumblr, instagram, Snapchat, facebook, wherever you'd like people to contact you

Suggested things to mention!

your pets, hobbies, the last YouTube video you watched, what your favorite color is, what your ideal first date would be, if you want kids, your zodiac sign, any extreme dealbreakers, if you drink/smoke/do any drugs/are sober, if you're an introvert or an extrovert

Ground Rules

No terfs, no zionists. This blog is pro Palestine and loves and supports and wholeheartedly welcomes all trans people.

No minors and no cishet men please.

This is a dating site with dykes (specifically stone4stone dykes) in mind and while other identities are welcomed, it is very much my intention to keep it dyke centered cause we really don't have any other place to go lmao. And minors I know it's lonely out there but this def isn't the place for you sadly. I'm gonna talk about sexual content here and I also cannot guarantee your safety based on who will contact you and I don't feel comfortable being an adult in charge of something like that. Please respect this boundary.

Lastly for everyone else, having someone post their profile here does not automatically mean that they're willing to be with anyone. Please exercise discernment with who you talk to just like you would in real life, and prioritize everyone's enthusiastic consent and comfortability.

Ok psa over, I'm gonna try to add more stuff later maybe I'm making this in a rush lol, but hopefully this helps some people out!!!

[canmom]

Music theory notes (for science bitches) - part 2: pentatonics and friends

or, the West ain't all that.

Hello again everyone! I'm grateful for the warm reception to the first music theory notes post (aka 'what is music? from first principles'). If you haven't read it, take a look~

In that stab at a first step towards 'what is music', I tried to distinguish between what's a relatively universal mathematical structure (nearly all musical systems have the octave) and what's an arbitrary convention. But in the end I did consciously limit myself, and make a beeline for the widely used 12TET tuning system and the diatonic scales used in Western music. I wanted to avoid overwhelming myself, and... 👻 it's all around us...👻

But! But but but. This is a series on music theory. Not just one music theory. The whole damn thing. I think I'm doing a huge disservice to everyone, not least me, if that's where we stop.

Today, then! For our second installation: 'Music theory notes (for science bitches)' will take a quick look through some examples that diverge from the diatonic scale: the erhu, Japanese pentatonic scales, gamelan, klezmer, and blues.

Also since the first part was quite abstract, we'll also having a go at using the tools we've built so far on a specific piece, the Edo-period folk song Sakura, Sakura.

Sound fun? Let's fucking gooooo

The story so far

To recap: in the first post we started by saying we're gonna be looking at tonal music, which isn't the only type of music. We introduced the idea of notes and frequencies by invoking the magic name of Fourier.

We said music can be approximated (for now) as an idealised pressure wave, which we can divide into brief windows called 'notes', and these notes are usually made of a strong sine wave at the 'fundamental frequency', plus a stack of further sine waves at integer multiples of that frequency called 'overtones'.

Then, we started constructing a culturally specific but extremely widespread system of creating structure between notes, known as '12 Tone Equal Temperament' or 12TET. The main character of this story is the interval, which is the ratio between the fundamental frequencies of two notes; we talked about how small-integer ratios of frequencies tend to be especially 'consonant' or nice-sounding.

We introduced the idea of the 'octave', which is when two notes have a frequency ratio of 2. We established the convention treating notes an octave apart as deeply related, to the point that we give them the same name. We also brought in the 'fifth', the ratio of 1.5, and talked about the idea of constructing a scale using small-integer ratios.

But we argued that if you try and build everything with those small-integer ratios you can dig yourself into a hole where moving around the musical space is rife with complications.

As a solution to this, I pulled out 'equal temperament' as an approximation with a lot of mathematical simplicity. Using a special irrational ratio called the "semitone" as a building block, we could construct the Western system of scales and modes and chords and such, where

a 'scale' is kind of like a palette for a piece of music, defined by a set of frequency ratios relative to a 'root' or 'tonic' note. this can be abstract, as in 'the major scale', or concrete, as in 'C major'.

a 'mode' is a cyclic permutation of an abstract scale. although it may contain the same notes, moving them around can change the feeling a lot!

a 'chord' is playing multiple notes at the same time. 'Triad' chords can be constructed from scales. There are other types which add or remove stuff from the triads. We'll come back to this.

I also summarised how sheet music works and the rather arbitrary choices in its construction, and at the end, I very briefly talked about chord notation.

There's a lot of ways to do this...

I recently watched a video by jazz musician and music theory youtuber Adam Neely, in which he and Philip Ewell discuss how much "music theory" is treated as synonymous with a very specific music theory which Neely glosses as "the harmonic style of 18th-century European composers". He argues, pretty convincingly imo, that 'music theory' pedagogy is seriously weakened by not taking non-white/Western models, such as Indian classical music theories, as a foil - citing Anuja Kamat's channel on Indian classical music as a great example of how to do things differently. Here's her introductory playlist on Indian classical music concepts, which I will hopefully be able to lean on in future posts:

There's two big pitfalls I wanna avoid as I teach myself music theory. I like maths a lot, and if I can fit something into a mathematical structure it's much easier for me to remember it - but I gotta be really careful not to mathwash some very arbitrary conventions and present them as more universal than they are. Music involves a lot of mathematics, but you can't reduce it to maths. It's a language for expressing emotion, not a predicate to prove.

One of the big goals of this series is to get straight in my head what has a good answer to 'why this way?', and what is just 'idk it's the convention we use'. And if something is an arbitrary convention, we gotta ask, what other conventions exist? Humans are inventive little buggers after all.

I also don't want to limit my analytical toolbox to a single 'hammer' of Western music theory, and try and force everything else into that frame. The reasons I'm learning music theory are... 1. to make my playing and singing better, and be more comfortable improvising; 2. to learn to compose stuff, which is currently a great mystery. How do they do it? I do like Western classical music, but honestly? Most of the music I enjoy is actually not Western. I want to be able to approach that music on its own terms.

For example, the erhu... for erhuample???

The instrument family I'm learning, erhu/zhonghu, is remarkably versatile - there are no frets (or even a soundboard!) to guide you, which is both a challenge and a huge freedom. You can absolutely play 12TET music on it, and it has a very beautiful sound - here is an erhu harmonising with a 12TET-tuned piano to play a song from the Princess Mononoke soundtrack, originally composed by Joe Hisaishi as an orchestral piece for the usual Western instruments...

This performance already makes heavy use of a technique called (in English) 'vibrato', where you oscillate the pitch around as you play the note (which means the whole construction that 'a note has a fixed pitch defined by a ratio' is actually an abstraction - now a note's 'frequency' represents the middle point a small range of pitches!). Vibrato is very common in Western music too, though the way you do it on an erhu and the way you do it on a violin or flute are of course a little different. (We could do an aside on Fourier analysis of vibrato here but I think that's another day's subject).

But if you listen to Chinese compositions specifically for Erhu, they take advantage of the lack of fixed pitch to zip up and down like crazy. Take the popular song Horse Racing for example, composed in the 1960s, which seems to be the closest thing to the 'iconic' erhu piece...

This can be notated in 12TET sheet music. But it's also taking full advantage of some of the unique qualities of the erhu's long string and lack of frets, like its ability to glide up and down notes, playing the full range of 'in between' frequencies on one string. The sheet music I linked there also has a notation style called 简谱 jiǎnpǔ which assigns numbers to notes. It's not so very different from Western sheet music, since it's still based on the diatonic major scale, but it's adjusted relative to the scale you're currently playing instead of always using C major. Erhu music very often includes very fast trills and a really skilled erhu/zhonghu player can jump between octaves with a level of confidence I find hard to comprehend.

I could spend this whole post putting erhu videos but let me just put one of the zhonghu specifically, which is a slightly deeper instrument; in Western terms the zhonghu (tuned to G and D) is the viola to the erhu's violin (tuned to D and A)...

To a certain degree, Chinese music is relatively easy to map across to the Western 12-tone chromatic scale. For example, the 十二律 shí'èr lǜ system uses essentially the same frequency ratios as the Pythagorean system. However, Chinese music generally makes much heavier use of pentatonic scales than Western music, and does not by default use equal temperament, instead using its own system of rational frequency ratios. correction: with the advent of Chinese orchestras in the mid-20thC, it seems that Chinese instruments now usually are tuned in equal temperament.

I would like my understanding of music theory to have a 'first class' understanding of Chinese compositions like Horse Racing (and also to have a larger reference pool lmao). I'm going to be starting formal erhu lessons next month, with a curriculum mostly focused on Chinese music. If I have interesting things to report back I'll be sure to share them!

Anyway, in a similar spirit, this post we're gonna try and do a brief survey of various musical constructs relevant to e.g. Japanese music, Klezmer, Blues, Indian classical music... I have to emphasise I am not an expert in any of these systems, so I can't promise to have the most elegant form of presentation for them, just the handles I've been able to get. I will be using Western music theory terms quite a bit still, to try and draw out the parallels and connections. But I hope it's going to be interesting all the same.

Let's start with... pentatonic scales!

Pentatonic scales

In the previous post we focused most of our attention on the diatonic scale. Confusingly, a "diatonic" scale is actually a type of heptatonic scale, meaning there are 7 notes inside an octave. As we've seen, the diatonic scale is constructed on top of the 12-semitone system.

Strictly defined, a 'diatonic' scale has five intervals of two semitones and two intervals of one semitone, and the one-semitone intervals are spread out as much as possible. So 'diatonic scales' includes the major scale and all its cyclic permutations (aka 'modes'), including the natural minor scale, but not the other two minor scales we talked about last time!

However, whoever said we should pick exactly 7 notes in the octave? That's rather arbitrary, isn't it?

After all, in illustration, a more restricted palette can often lead to a much more visually striking image. The same is perhaps even more true in music!

A pentatonic scale is, as the name suggests, a scale which has five notes in an octave. Due to all that stuff we discussed with small-number ratios, the pentatonic scales we are about to discuss can generally be mapped quite easily onto the 12-tone system. There's some reason for this - 12TET is designed to closely approximate the appealing small-number frequency ratios, so if another system uses the same frequency ratios, we can probably find a subset of 12TET that's a good match.

Of course, fitting 12TET doesn't mean it matches the diatonic scale, necessarily. Still, once you're on the 12 tone system, there's enough diatonic scales out there that you can often define a pentatonic scale in terms of a delta relative to one of the diatonic scale modes. Like, 'shift this degree down, delete that degree'.

Final caveat: I'm not sure if it's strictly correct to use equal temperament in all these examples, but all the sources I find define these scales using Western music notation, so we'll have to go with that.

Sakura, sakura and the yonanuki scale

Let's start with Japanese music. Here's the Edo-period folk song Sakura, Sakura, which is one of the most iconic pieces of Japanese music¸ especially abroad:

This uses the in scale, also known as the sakura pentatonic scale, one of a few widely used pentatonic scales in Japanese folk music, along with the yo scale, insen scale and iwato scale... according to English-language sources.

Finding the actual Japanese was a bit difficult - so far as I can tell the Japanese wiki page for Sakura, Sakura never mentions the scale named after it! - but eventually I found a page for pentatonic scales, or 五音音階 goon onkai. So we can finally determine the kanji for this scale is 陰音階 in onkai or 陰旋法 in senpou. [Amusingly, the JP wiki article on pentatonic scales actually leads with... Scottish folk songs and gamelan before it goes into Japanese music.]

However, perhaps more pertinent is this page: ヨナ抜き音階 which introduces the terms yonanuki onkai and ニロ抜き音階 nironuki onkai. This can be glossed as 'leave out the fourth (yo) and seventh (na) scale' and 'leave out the second (ni) and sixth (ro) scale', describing two procedures to construct pentatonic scales from a diatonic scale.

Let's recap major and minor. Last time we defined them using semitone intervals from a root note (the one in brackets is the next octave):

position: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, (8) major: 0, 2, 4, 5, 7, 9, 11, (12) minor: 0, 2, 3, 5, 7, 8, 10, (12)

From here we can construct some pentatonic scales. Firstly, here are your yonanuki scales - the ones that delete the fourth and seventh:

major: 0, 2, 4, 7, 9, (12) minor: 0, 2, 3, 7, 8, (12)

Starting on C for the major and A for the minor (the ones with the blank key signature), this is how you notate that in Western sheet music. As you can see, we have just deleted a couple of steps.

The first one is the 'standard' major pentatonic scale in Western music theory; it's also called the ryo scale in traditional Japanese music (呂旋法 ryosenpou). The second one is a mode (cyclic permutation) of a scale called 都節音階 miyakobushi, which is apparently equivalent to the in scale.

In terms of gaps between successive notes, these go:

major: 2, 2, 3, 2, 3 - very even minor: 2, 1, 4, 1, 4 - whoah, huge intervals!

The miyakobushi scale, for comparison, goes...

miyakobushi (absolute): 0, 1, 5, 7, 8, (12) miyakobushi (deltas): 1, 4, 2, 1, 4

JP wikipedia lists two different versions of the 陰旋法 (in scale), for ascending and descending. Starting on C, one goes C, D, Eb, G, A; the other goes C, D, Eb, G, Ab. Let's convert that into my preferred semitone interval notation:

in scale (absolute, asc): 0, 2, 3, 7, 9, (12) in scale (relative, asc): 2, 1, 4, 2, 3 in scale (absolute, desc): 0, 2, 3, 7, 8, (12) in scale (relative, desc): 2, 1, 4, 1, 4

So we see that the 'descending form' of the in scale matches the minor yonanuki scale, and it's a mode (cyclic permutation) of the miyakobushi scale.

We've talked a great deal about the names and construction of the different type of scales, but beyond the vague gesture to the standard associations of 'major upbeat, minor sad/mysterious' I don't think we've really looked at how a scale actually affects a piece of music.

So let's have a look at the semitone intervals in Sakura, Sakura in absolute terms from to the first note...

sakura, sakura, ya yoi no so ra-a wa 0, 0, 2; 0, 0, 2; 0, 2, 3, 2, 0, 2-0, -4

and in relative terms between successive notes:

sa ku ra, sa ku ra, ya yo i no so ra-a wa 0, 0, +2; -2, 0, +2; -2, +2, +1, -1, -2, +2, -2, -4

If you listen to Sakura, Sakura, pay attention to the end of the first line - that wa suddenly drops down a huge distance (a major second - for some reason I miscalculated this and thought it was a tritone) and that's where it feels like damn, OK, this song is really cooking! It catches you by surprise. We can identify these intervals as belonging to the in/yoyanuki minor scale, and even starting on its root note.

Although its subject matter is actually pretty positive (hey, check it out guys, the cherry blossoms are falling!), Sakura, Sakura sounds mournful and mysterious. What makes it sound 'minor'? The first phrase doesn't actually tell you what key we're in, that jump of 2 semitones could happen in major or minor. But the second phrase, introduces the pattern of going up 2, then up 1, from the root note - that's the minor scale pattern. What takes it beyond just 'we're in minor'? That surprise tritone move down. According to the rough working model that 'dissonant notes create tension, consonant notes resolve it', this creates a ton of tension. This analysis is bunk, there isn't a tritone. It's a big jump but it's not that big a jump.

How does it eventually wrap up? The final phrase of Sakura, Sakura goes...

i za ya, i za ya, mi ni yu - u ka nn 0, 0, 2; 0, 0, 2; -5, -4, 2, 0, -4, -5 0, 0, +2; -2, 0, +2; -5, +1, +4, -2, -4, -1

Here's my attempt to try and do a very basic tonal/interval analysis. We start out this phrase with the same notes as the opening bars, but abruptly diverge in bar 3, slowing down at the same time, which provides a hint that things are about to come to a close. The move of -5 down is a perfect fourth; in contrast to the tritone major second we had before, this is considered a very consonant interval. (A perfect fourth down is also equivalent to going up a fifth and then down an octave. So we're 'ending on the fifth'.) We move up a little and down insteps of 4, 2, and 1, which are less dramatic. Then we come back down and end on the fifth. We still have those 4-steps next to 1 steps which is the big flag that says 'whoah we're in the sakura pentatonic scale', but we're bleeding off some of the tension here.

Linguistically, the song also ends on the mora ん, the only mora that is only a consonant (rather than a vowel or consonant-vowel), and that long drawn-out voiced consonant gives a feeling of gradually trailing away. So you could call it a very 'soft' ending.

Is this 'tension + resolution' model how a Japanese music theorist would analyse this song? It seems to be a reasonably effective model when applied to Japanese music by... various music theorist youtubers, but I don't really know! That's something I want to find out more about.

Something raised on the English wiki is the idea that the miyakobushi scale is divided into two groups, spanning a fourth each, which is apparently summarised by someone called Koizumi Fumio in a book written in 1974:

Each group goes up 1 (a semitone or minor second), then 4 (major third), for a total of 5 (perfect fourth). The edges of these little blocks are considered 'nucleus' notes, and they're of special importance.

Can we see this in action if we look at Sakura, Sakura? ...ehhhh. I admit, the way I think of the song is shaped by the way I play it on the zhonghu; I think of the first two two-bar phrases as the 'upper part' and the third phrase as the 'lower part', and neither lines up neatly with these little groups. Still. I suspect Koizumi Fumio, author of Nihon no ongaku, knows a little more about this than I do, so I figure it's worth a mention.

Aside: on absorbing a song

Sakura, Sakura is kinda special to me because it's like the second piece I learned to play on zhonghu (after Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star lmao). I can't play it well, but I am proud that I have learned to play it at least recognisably.

The process of learning to play it involved writing out tabs and trying out different ways of moving my hand. I transcribed Sakura Sakura down to start on F, since that way the open G string of the zhonghu could be the lowest note of the piece, and worked out a tab for it using a tab system I cooked up with my friend. Here's what it looks like. The system counts semitones up from the open string, and it uses an underline to mark the lower string.

(Also, credit where it's due - I would never have made any progress learning about music if not for my friend Maki Yamazaki, a prodigiously multitalented self-taught musician who can play dozens of instruments, and also the person who sold me her old zhonghu for dirt cheap, if you're wondering why a white British girl might be learning such an unusual instrument. You can and should check our her music here! Maki has done more than absolutely anyone to make music comprehensible to me, and a lot of this post is inspired by discussing the previous post with her.)

When you want to make a song playable on an instrument, you have to perform some interpretation. Which fingers should play which notes? When should you move your hand? How do you make sure you hit the right notes? At some point this kind of movement becomes second nature, but I'm at the stage, just like a player encountering a new genre of videogame, where I still don't have the muscle memory or habituation to how things work, and each of these little details has to be worked out one by one. But this is great, because this process makes me way more intimately familiar with the contours of the song. Trying to analyse the moves it makes like the above even more so.

More Japanese scales

So, to sum up what we've observed, the beautiful minor sounds of Sakura Sakura come from a pentatonic scale which can be constructed by taking the diatonic scale and blasting certain notes into the sea, namely the fourth and the seventh of the scale. But what about the nironuki scale? Well, this time we delete the second and the sixth. So we get, in absolute terms:

major nironuki (abs): 0, 4, 5, 7, 11, (12) major nironuki (rel): 4, 1, 2, 4, 1 minor nironuki (abs): 0, 3, 5, 7, 10, (12) minor nironuki (rel): 3, 2, 2, 3, 2

Hold on a minute, doesn't that look rather familiar? The major nironuki scale is a permutation, though not a cyclic permutation, of the minor yonanuki scale. And the minor nironuki scale is a cyclic permutation (mode) of the major one.

Nevertheless, these scales have names and significance of their own. The major one is known as the 琉球音階 ryūkyū onkai or Okinawan scale. The minor one is what Western music would call a 'minor pentatonic scale'. It also mentions a couple of other names for it, like the 民謡音階 minyou onkai (folk scale).

We also have the yō scale, which like the in scale, comes in ascending and descending forms. You want these too? Yeah? Ok, here we go.

yō scale (asc, abs): 0, 2, 5, 7, 10, (12) yō scale (asc, rel): 2, 3, 2, 3, 2 yō scale (desc, abs): 0, 2, 5, 7, 9, (12) yō scale (desc, rel): 2, 3, 2, 2, 3

The yō scale is what's called an anhemitonic pentatonic scale, which is just a fancy way of saying it doesn't have semitones. (The in scale in turn is hemitonic). The ascending form is also called the 律戦法 ritsusenpou. Here's the complete table of all the variants I've found so far.

So, in summary: Japanese music uses a lot of pentatonic scales. (In a future post we can hopefully see how that applies in modern Japanese music). These pentatonic scales can be constructed by deleting two notes from the diatonic scales. In general, you land in one of two zones: the anhemitonic side, where all the intervals between successive notes, are 2 and 3, and the hemitonic side, where the intervals are spicier 1s and 4s and a lone 2. From there, you can move between other pentatonic scales by cyclic permutations and reversal.

If you analyse Japanese music from a Western lens, you might well end up interpreting it according to one of the modes of the major scale. In fact, the 8-bit music theory video I posted last time takes this approach. This isn't wrong per se, it's a viable way to getting insight into how the tune works if you want to ask the question 'how does this conjure emotions and how do I get the same effects', but it's worthwhile to know what analytical frame the composers are likely to be using.

Gamelan - when 12TET won't cut it

Gamelan is a form of Indonesian ensemble music. I do not at this time know a ton about it, but here's a performance:

However, if you're reading my blog then it's likely that if know gamelan from anywhere, it's most likely the soundtrack to Akira composed by Shōji Yamashiro.

This blends traditional gamelan instrumentation and voices with modern synths to create an incredibly bold and (for most viewers outside Indonesia!) unfamiliar sound to accompany the film's themes of psychic awakening and evolution. It was an inspired choice, adding a lot to an already great film.

'A gamelan' is the ensemble; 'gamelan' is also the style of music. There are many different types of gamelan associated with different occasions - some gamelans are only allowed to form for special ceremonies. Gamelan is also used as a soundtrack in accompaniment to other art forms, such as wayang kulit and wayang wong (respectively, shadow puppetry and dance).

Since gamelan music evidently uses quite a bit of percussion, and so far we've been focused on the type of music played on strings and wind instruments - a brief comment on the limitations of our abstractions. Many types of drums don't fit the 'tonal music' frame we've outlined so far, creating a broad frequency spectrum that's close to an enveloped burst of white noise rather than a sharply peaked fundamental + overtones. There's a ton to study in drumming, and if this series continues you bet I'll try to understand it.

But there are tonal percussion instruments, and a lot of them are to be found in gamelan, particularly in the metalophone family (e.g. the ugal or jegogan). The Western 'xylophone' and 'glockenspiel' also belong to this family. Besides metalophones, you've got bells, steel drums, tuning forks etc. Tuning a percussion instrument is a matter of adjusting the shape of the metal to adjust the resonant frequency of its normal modes. I imagine it's really fiddly.

In any case, the profile of a percussion note is quite different from the continual impulse provided by e.g. a violin bow. You get a big burst across all frequencies and then everything but the resonant mode dies out, leaving the ringing with a much simpler spectrum.

Anyway, let's get on to scales and shit. While I have the Japanese wikipedia page on pentatonic scales open, that it mentions a gamelan scale called pelog (written ᮕᮦᮜᮧᮌ᮪, ꦥꦺꦭꦺꦴꦒ꧀ or ᬧᬾᬮᭀᬕ᭄ in different languages) meaning 'beautiful'. Pelog is not strictly one scale, but a family of tunings which vary across Indonesia. Depending on who you ask, it might in some cases be reasonably close to a 9-tone equal temperament (9TET), which means a number of notes can't be represented in 12TET - you have that 4 12TET semitones would be equivalent to 3 9TET semitones. From this is drawn a heptatonic scale, but not one that can be mapped exactly to any 12TET heptatonic scale. Isn't that fun!

To represent scales that don't exactly fit the tuning of 12TET, there's a logarithmic unit of measure called the 'cent'. Each 12TET semitone contains 100 cents, so in terms of ratios, a cent is the the 1200th root of 2. In this system, a 9TET semitone is 133 cents. Some steps in the pelog heptatonic scale would then be two 9TET semitones, and others one 9TET semitone. However, this system of 'semitones' does not seem to be how gamelan music is actually notated - it's assumed you already have an established pelog tuning and can play within that. So it's a little difficult for me to give you a decent representation of a gamelan scale that isn't approximated by 12TET.

From the 7-tone pelog scale, whatever it happens to be where you live, you can further derive pentatonic scales. These have various names, like the pelog selisir used in the gamelan gong kebyar. I'm not going to itemise them here both because I haven't actually been able to find the basic pelog tunings (at least by their 9TET approximation).

Another scale used in gamelan is called slendro, a five tone scale of 'very roughly' equal intervals. Five is coprime with 12, so there's no straightforward mapping of any part of this scale to the 12-tone system. But more than that, fully even scales are quite rare in the places we've looked so far. (Though apparently within slendro, you can play a note that's deliberately 'out of place', called 'miring'. This transforms the mood from 'light, cheerful and busy' to one appropriate to scenes of 'homesickness, love missing, sadness, death, languishing'.)

The Western musical notation system is plainly unsuited for gamelan, and naturally it has its own system - or rather several systems. In one method, the seven tones of the pelog are numbered 1 through 7, and a subset of those numbers are used to enumerate slendro tuning. You can write it on a grid similar to a musical staff.

But we could wonder with this research - is the attempt to map pélog to 'equal temperament' an external imposition? Presented with a tuning system with seven intervals that are not consistently equal temperament, averaging them to construct an equal temperament hypothesis on that basis, and finally attempting to prove that gamelan players 'prefer' equal temperament... well, they do at least bother to ask, but I'm not entirely convinced that 9TET or 5TET is the right model. Unfortunately, most of the literature I'm able to find on gamelan music theory with a cursory search is by Western researchers.

There's a fairly long history of Western composers taking inspiration from gamelan, notably Debussy and Saty. And of course, modern Indonesian composers such as I Nyoman Windha have also been finding ways to combine gamelan with Western styles. Here's a piece composed by him (unfortunately not a splendid recording):

Klezmer - layer 'em up

If you've known me for long enough you might remember the time I had a huge Daniel Kahn and the Painted Bird phase. (I still think he's great, I just did that thing where I obsessively listen to one small set of things for a period). And I'd also listen to old revolutionary songs in Yiddish all the time. Because of course I did lmao. Anyway, here's a song that combines both: Kahn's modern arrangement of Arbetlose Marsch in English and Yiddish:

That's a style of music called klezmer, developed by Ashkenazi Jews in Central/Eastern Europe starting in the late 1500s and 1600s. It's a blend of a whole bunch of different traditions, combining elements from Jewish religious music with other neighbouring folk music traditions and European music at large. When things really kicked off at the end of the 19th century, klezmer musicians were often a part of the Jewish socialist movement (and came up with some real bangers - the Tsar may have been shot by the Bolsheviks but tbh, Daloy Politsey already killed him). But equally there's a reason it sounds insanely danceable: it was very often used for dances.

The rest of the 20th century happened, but klezmer survived all the genocides and there are lots of different modern klezmer bands.

The defining characteristics of klezmer per Wikipedia are... ok, this is quite long...

Klezmer musicians apply the overall style to available specific techniques on each melodic instrument. They incorporate and elaborate the vocal melodies of Jewish religious practice, including khazones, davenen, and paraliturgical song, extending the range of human voice into the musical expression possible on instruments.[21] Among those stylistic elements that are considered typically "Jewish" in Klezmer music are those which are shared with cantorial or Hasidic vocal ornaments, including dreydlekh ("tear in the voice"; plural of dreidel)[22][23] and imitations of sighing or laughing ("laughter through tears").[24] Various Yiddish terms were used for these vocal-like ornaments such as קרעכץ (Krekhts, "groan" or "moan"), קנײטש (kneytsh, "wrinkle" or "fold"), and קװעטש (kvetsh, "pressure" or "stress").[10] Other ornaments such as trills, grace notes, appoggiaturas, glitshn (glissandos), tshoks (a kind of bent notes of cackle-like sound), flageolets (string harmonics),[22][25]pedal notes, mordents, slides and typical Klezmer cadences are also important to the style.[18]

So evidently klezmer will be relevant throughout this series, but for now, since we're trying to flesh out the picture of 'how is tuning formed', let's take a look at the notes.

So it's absolutely possible to fit klezmer into the 12TET system. But we're going to need to crack open a few new scales. Though the Wikipedia editors enumerating this list caution us: "Another problem in listing these terms as simple eight-note (octatonic) scales is that it makes it harder to see how Klezmer melodic structures can work as five-note pentachords, how parts of different modes typically interact, and what the cultural significance of a given mode might be in a traditional Klezmer context."

With that caution in mind, let's at least see what we're given. First of all we have the Freygish or Ahavoh Rabboh scale, one of the most common pieces, good friend of the Western phrygian but with an extra semitone. Then there's Mi Sbererakh or Av HaRachamim which is a mode of it, that's popular around Ukraine. Adonoy Molokh or Adoyshem Molokh is the major scale but you drop the seventh a semitone. Mogen Ovos is the same as the natural minor at least on the interval level.

Which means, without the jargon, here are the semitones (wow wouldn't it be nice if you had tables on here?):

position: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, (8) freygish: 0, 1, 4, 5, 7, 8, 10, (12) deltas: 1, 3, 1, 2, 1, 2, 2 mi sberakh: 0, 2, 3, 6, 7, 9, 10, (12) deltas: 2, 1, 3, 2, 2, 1, 2 adonoy m.: 0, 2, 4, 5, 7, 9, 10, (12) deltas: 2, 2, 1, 2, 2, 1, 2 mogen o.: 0, 2, 3, 5, 7, 8, 10, (12) deltas: 2, 1, 2, 2, 1, 2, 2

...that's a big block of numbers to make your eyes glaze over huh. Maybe this 'convert everything to semitone deltas' thing isn't all it's cracked up to be... or maybe what I need to do is actually visualise it somehow? Some kinda big old graph showing all the different scales we've worked out so far and how they relate to each other? ...hold your horses...

[It seems like what I've done is reinvent something called 'musical set theory', incidentally.]

OK, having enumerated these, let's return to the Wikipedian's caution. What is a pentachord? Pretty simple, it's a chord of five notes. Mind you, some people define it as five successive notes of a diatonic scale.

In klezmer, you've got a bunch of different instruments playing at once creating a really dense sound texture. Presumably one of the things you do when you play klezmer is try and get the different instruments in your ensemble to hit the different levels of that pentachord. How does that work? Well, if we consult the sources, we find this scan of a half-handwritten PDF presenting considerably more detail on the modes and how they're played. The scales above are combined with a 'motivic scheme' presenting different patterns that notes tend to follow, and a 'typical cadence'. Moreover, these modes can have 'sub-modes' which tend to follow when the main mode gets established.

To me reading this, I can kind of imagine the process of composing/improvisation within this system almost like a state machine. It's not just that you have a scale, you have a certain state you're in in the music (e.g. main mode or sub-mode), and a set of transitional moves you can potentially make for the next segment. That's probably too rigid a model though. There's also a more specific aspect discussed in the book that a klezmer musician needs to know how to move between their repertoire of klezmer pieces - what pieces can sensibly follow from what.

Ultimately, I don't want to give you a long list of stuff to memorise. (Sure, if you want to play klezmer, you probably need to get familiar with how to use these modes, but that's between you and your klezmer group). Rather I want to make sure we don't have any illusion that the Western church modes are the only correct way to compose music.

Blues - can anyone agree?

Blues is a style of music developed by Black musicians in the American south in the late 1800s, directly or indirectly massively influential on just about every genre to follow, but especially jazz. It's got a very characteristic style defined by among other elements use of 'blue notes' that don't fit the standard diatonic scale. According to various theorists, you can add the blue notes to a scale to construct something called the 'blues scale'. According to certain other theorists, this exercise is futile, and Blues techniques can't be reduced to a scale.

So for the last part of today's whirlwind tour of scales, let's take a brief look at the blues...

There are a few different blues scales. The most popular definition seems to be a hexatonic scale. We'll start with the minor pentatonic scale, or in Japanese, the minor nironuki scale - which is to say we take the minor diatonic scale and delete positions 2 and 6. That gives:

minor nironuki (abs): 0, 3, 5, 7, 10, (12) minor nironuki (rel): 3, 2, 2, 3, 2

Now we need to add a new note, the 'flat fifth degree' of the original scale. In other words, 6 semitones above the root - the dreaded tritone!

hexatonic blues (abs): 0, 3, 5, 6, 7, 10, (12) hexatonic blues (rel): 3, 2, 1, 1, 3, 2

Easy enough right? Listen to that, it does sound kinda blues-y. But hold your horses! Moments after defining this scale, we read...

A major feature of the blues scale is the use of blue notes—notes that are played or sung microtonally, at a slightly higher or lower pitch than standard.[5] However, since blue notes are considered alternative inflections, a blues scale may be considered to not fit the traditional definition of a scale.

So, if you want to play blues, it's not enough to mechanically play a specific scale in 12TET. You also gotta break the palette a little bit.

There's also a 'major blues' heptatonic scale which goes 0, 2, 3, 4, 7, 9, according to one guy called Dan Greenblatt.

But that's not the only attempt to enumerate the 'blues scale'. Other authors will give you slightly longer scales. For example, if you ask Smallwood:

heptatonic blues (abs): 0, 2, 3, 5, 6, 9, 10, (12) heptatonic blues (rel): 2, 1, 2, 1, 3, 1, 2

which isn't quite a mode of any of those klezmer scales we saw previously, but nearly!

If you ask Benward and Saker, meanwhile, a Blues scale could actually be nonatonic scale, where you add flattened versions of a couple of notes to the major scale.

nonatonic blues (abs): 0, 2, 3/4, 5, 7, 9, 10/11, (12)

There's also an idea that you should play notes in between the semitones, i.e. quarter tones, which would be a freq ratio of the 24th root of 2 if you're keeping score at home.

The upshot of all this is probably that going too far formalise the blues is probably not in the spirit of the blues, but if you want to go in a blues-y direction it will probably mean insert an extra, flattened version of a note to one of your scales. Muck around and see what works, I guess!

Of course, there's a lot more to Blues than just tweaking a scale. For example, 'twelve bar blues' is a specific formalised chord progression that is especially universal in Jazz. What it means for chords to 'progress' is a whole subject, and I think that's the next thing I'll try to understand for post 3. Hopefully we'll be furnished with a slightly broader model of how music works as we go there though.

To wrap up, here's the spreadsheet showing all the 12TET scales encountered so far in this series in a visual way. There's obviously plenty more out there, but this is not ultimately a series about scales. It's all well and good to have a list of what exists, but it's pointless if we don't know how to use it.

Phew

Mind you even with all this, we haven't covered at all some of the most complex systems of tonal music - I've only made the vaguest gesture towards Indian classical music, Chinese music, Jazz... That's way beyond me at the moment. But maybe not forever.

Next up: I'm going to try and finally wrap my head around chords and make sense of what it means for them to 'progress', have 'movement' etc. And maybe render a bit more concrete the vague stuff I said about 'tension' and 'resolution'.

(Also: I definitely know I have friends on here who are very widely knowledgeable about music theory. If I've made any major mistakes, please let me know! At some point I hope to republish this series with nicer formatting on canmom.art, and it would be great to fix the bugs by then!)

[roses-dreams-andthorns]

Hello! Can I request a reader that has the same power as Chuuya from BSD? (Gravity manipulation) with the first years. If there is a character limit you can kick off anyone you want.

Thank you and have an amazing rest of your day/night!

Hiyaaaa!! and you have a good day/night too!! Trey really liked this idea, so, lets goooo!! I'm gonna add some of Chuuya's other abilites too (Enhanced Speed, durability, strength and reflexes) (Also, Trey hasn't watched BSD yet, so please forgive me if it isn't acurate-)

Ace

Gravokinesis is probably a hard type of magic to learn, (since no one in Twisted Wonderland seems to use it, let alone mention anything about gravity magic-) so when he sees you just ever so casually magically lift up some huge rock that was in your way, or tear a piece out of ground he sits there like "How the hell?" and will remain that way for the rest of the day. He does find it cool though, but knowing Ace, he's not gonna admit that. Someone's in your way? pull a huge rock over and smash em'. Someone's annoying you? Bring in the rocks and crush em'. that's basically what you do... or you would do, if it wasn't against the school rules to crush people with rocks... He also finds your magic quite useful too, you can get him out of sitcky situations he probably caused by making him float mid air and dragging him somewhere Riddle can't get to him, and he pays you well when you do it, so its a win-win for the both of you. There are sometimes, though, he just wants to feel like he's flying without a broom.

"Hey, Reader! Lift me up!" he demaned, eyes sparkling with excitement, but still trying to keep his cool exterior.

"Hm? you wanna fly, I assume? Well.... I suppose it wouldn't hurt... just don't do anything stupid." you lecture, Ace giggles, replying with, "I know, I know!"

You cast your magic, making Ace float mid air, he smiles brightly, like hes having the time of his life.

Deuce

My sweet boy... he'd find it so cool, and asks you if theres any way you can teach him. He loves it when you use your magic on him to make him float, he feels like a bird everytime and something in him flutters like he swallowed a swarm of butterflies. You've also used it a few times to protect him, resurecting bits of the ground to throw off the path of a bunch of idiots that dared put Deuce in harms way.

"Deuce, get back!" you yelled, stepping between him and the delingquents were persuing him, using your gravokinesis, you threw off their path, and lead Deuce safely to the infirmary.

"How many times do I have to tell you to be careful, Deuce..." you lecture as you patched his injuried arm.

"I'm sorry... are you mad?" He asks.

"What kind of ridiculous question is that? of course I'm not. I just don't like seeing you get hurt." you assure him, as you sigh.

Epel

he thinks you're pretty manly, being able to do all these stunts and tricks with gravity... If only he could do that... Your gravity, plus your enhanced speed and reflexes make it super easy for you to do these really complex looking combo moves, if I went into detail on them, this would probably exceed tumblrs word limit...

"Oi! Reader! Teach me how to do that gravity stuff! I wanna do all the cool, manly tricks you do!" Epel demands confidently, giving you his signature smirk.

"Hm... fine. But..... I expect you to listen when I teach you, take notes, study it, and practice it, otherwise, I'll quit teaching you."

Jack

When he first witnessed your gravokinesis was probably during the magift tournament, when you partnered with Heartslabyul. You speed was greater than anyone else's on the field, you had greater durability and stamina, and your reflexes were so fast, hardly anyone could see when you caught and tossed the disk, you got Heartslabyul quite a few goals with that.

"Reader, mind if I asked... how did you get your gravity magic?" Jack asks you curiously.

"I was born with it, I suppose..." you respond, you honestly didn't remember how you got it.... so you assumed it was something you were born with.

"Is... there a way you could teach me? It could be useful for my workouts..." he comments

"Yeah, I can teach you, I guess, Just pay close attention, okay?"

Sebek

Though he will not ever dare admit it, he finds it cool and awesome, but of course, his mindset is just "WAKA-SAMA IS SUPERIOR" so he takes your gravokinesis as a threat to WAKA-SAMA's power, thinking how easily you could take WAKA-SAMA's throne. (Yes it is now a requirement for Trey to write WAKA-SAMA in all caps)

"HUMAN! I demand you explain your power at once!" He yells, almost breaking your eardrums

"Ouch! Chill, Sebek! All I can do is maniplulate gravity! is there any further explanation needed?" you yell back.

"YES! I require you to describe to me the innerworkings of your power!" he demands, acting like its a threat, when in reality he just wants to learn it so he can impress WAKA-SAMA!

[trailmixedup]

OKAY! So!! I am one week post op from top surgery and here are the things I have learned:

• nothing prepares you for how fucking bloated you get. It is emotionally and physically devastating.

• eat protein or you’re going to start dreaming about it.

• get ready to literally not have any reading comprehension or speaking ability until you’re after the heavy pain med. and then after that as well…

• holy shit your back is gonna hurt. You can’t crack it. No twisting.

• you can’t use ice packs on your actual chest, but they’re lifesavers to sleep with- I put mine under my neck on my pillow to keep my neck from cramping.

• the pressure and tension on your chest is uncomfortable but not unbearable. Mostly it’s just annoying.

• you need pockets. Dear gods you NEED pockets.

• you do not want pants with a button. The button pants will not fit and it will make you sad. It’s just not even worth trying. Just have drawstring pants, it’s easier on the ego.

• wiping your ass is hard now. I’m sorry.

• blowing your nose hurts. Sneezing hurts. Coughing hurts. Laughing hurts. Just… avoid needing too much lung capacity all at once.

• If you have body hair prepare for your compression garments to hurt. My skin is so tender and painful all of the time. And there’s no break.

• if you keep your nipples you won’t be allowed to shower for 2 weeks. You’re going to start stinking. Have someone around you that is willing to wash your hair like how they wash babies hair. Also have rubbing alcohol so that you can neutralize your armpit stink because deodorant is off limits for your healing incisions.

• chapstick is not optional. You’re going to want it.

• same goes for a big cup with a well-sealed lid and a straw. Drink so much water.

• you’re going to feel helpless and useless. It sucks. It’s okay. Don’t push yourself.

• you’re going to want to wear pants with pockets to bed so you have somewhere to put your drains. You’ll be so tired that it doesn’t matter for the first couple days.

• you want the longest phone charger known to man. I promise. There is no such thing as too long.

• ask for the anti-nausea patch. You’re going to want it, and it lasts like 3 days. Throwing up HURTS.

• the healthier you can be before the surgery the easier your recovery is going to be. It isn’t fatphobic or stuck up or whatever else people say to lose excess weight and eat super clean before your surgery. Start moving your body every day. Start practicing going from sitting to standing and laying to standing without using your hands. Your body will reward effort to be healthy with safer surgery and easier healing.

• oh my god buy a serious laxative that you know works for you. Your body will literally forget how to shit.

• if you can, buy paper medical tape, gauze pads, and extra strength Tylenol. You will use them.

• plan to take naps. There is no weakness in a nap.

• get up and stretch your legs hourly. I promise it’s worth it. You will feel so much better.

• you’re going to want a hat or some sort of hair control.

• if the binder doesn’t fit you in the arm holes, you don’t have to let it chafe at your armpits and hurt like a mother fucker. Just cut the arm holes wider with a pair of scissors.

• have some sort of routine. You’ll fall apart otherwise.

• you’re going to be snippy and bitchy. Get ready to apologize for being an asshole. Short tempers happen, but don’t forget to say sorry.

• prepare yourself for all the random tape and other stuff to itch. You just have to grin and bear it. Things are so itchy.

That’s all I can think of right now, plus I’m sleepy. I will add to the list when I think of more ^_^

[skyward-floored]

Hey, just wanted to say I think you’re a cool person and I really like the little writing you do. They’re very cool and, even though I’ve only read like 2 (curse my small attention span ravaged by yt shorts and also adhd), they make me feel fuzzy (well, the ones that are fuzzy anyways) and emotions. Basically, you write amazingly. Hope this doesn’t come off as robotic, I’m not good at expressing appreciation through words but I’d totally make you a pizza as like a kudos.

If you don’t mind me asking also, do you have any tips or advice on how to start writing? I’ve been meaning to try but my brain and doubts (and lack of action and starting) keep me back, and you write cool stuff so I figured why not ask? Hope this isn’t annoying (if it is, feel free to ignore this latter thing) and may you have cookies in the future :)

Hey thank you! Don’t worry it didn’t come off as robotic at all, thanks for the kind words (and pizza kudos XD)!

I can try and give you some tips? I don’t know if they’ll be very useful, especially since it’s been a bit since I started writing, but I’ll try? Since you said one of your problems was doubts, I’ll start there since I definitely have experience with that XD

Basically... you’re always gonna have doubts as a writer. Maybe some writers don’t, but I think everyone I know who writes does. I nearly had a panic attack when I posted my first ever fic (a tiny little ninjago oneshot lol), and the only reason I didn’t totally freak out and delete it was because a friend told me it was really nice and she encouraged me. That was over four years ago, and while I’m past the panic attack stage, I still worry and fret about my writing and if anyone will like them... etcetera.

I guess what I’m trying to say is you can’t let doubt stop you. There are always going to be those voices telling your writing sucks, and that it isn’t worth it. And you gotta ignore them. Writing is a skill like any other, and at first, you probably are gonna suck, but you can’t let that stop you—you have to try and keep going, and build that skill.

But that wasn’t much about actual writing XD If you really want to start writing, start by thinking about what you want to write. I’m sure you’ve got an idea of some sort in mind— and even if it’s silly or weird or overdone or seems too hard to write, start there. See what happens.

If you’re having trouble starting, I’d suggest skipping straight to the cool parts of the scene you want to write. Don’t worry about having the perfect starting point, just jump right in to the middle of that emotional injury or dramatic escape. The rest can come later... or not! That’s the beauty of fanfic!

I myself try and write just a little every day. Even if it’s only one sentence, try and add just a little to it. I don’t have adhd so I can’t really help you much in that regard, but if distractions are the problem, try and get rid of them before you start writing.

Put your phone in a different room so you can’t get at it, go off where your family hopefully won’t bother you (this is a big one for me lol), just try to limit your distractions as best you can.

I think that’s all I got XD that was mostly a lot of talk, but hopefully some of it was helpful! Good luck!

[karlachismylife]

Gorilla!reader you say ? 👁️ 👁️

Yeah! Sorry I'm actually excited to yap about it hahaha cuz it has been really forming quite in details in my head last days

It is obviously very self-indulgent (in case not everyone noticed, I refer to myself as gorilla and it's a lifelong thing), not fully self-insert, but uhhh. My ideal self insert? Maybe not that either. But deeply personal and with a lot of my issues/problems/feelings projected there, that's what I mean. I don't know how enjoyable it will be for people reading it, but it's just something I really wanna write, so I'll do it anyway. And post it cuz well I'm an attention whore.

So I have been going back and forth on whether make it shapeshifter or hybrid, and I ended up deciding on shapeshifter. First of all, "weregorilla" is prime for stupid puns fueled by gorilla talk, and second, it will kida help me avoid misrepresenting gorillas (because this reader will be very aggressive and gorillas ARE NOT) + adds actually a layer of depth in the sense that I can play off the contrast of animal/human form in this case. Don't know if I'll go full on "two souls in one body" route, but there are things I want to show through the duality.

It's gonna be a classic "new addition to tf141 is a shapeshifter" plot, cuz I'm a basic bitch like that, and yes, it's gonna be poly 141 x reader but also big emphasise on found family. The more I think about it, the more I realize that it doesn't feel right for me to write it without touching on racism, in the military and in general, and it's probably gonna be very on the nose and clumsy, but this whole thing is basically on the nose and not nuanced at all. It's very much stemming from all the pent up rage I have inside, and rage knows no nuance. Oh and gender stuff too, cuz yeah, well, self-insert part, and I don't know gender. Never met her. That one would be fun actually, cuz gorillas are pretty patriarchal and form harems, but like. Where does a genderqueer gorilla fit into this hierarchy? Since obviously 141 will be like this reader's troop (gorilla pack), that would be a fun disruption if I manage to do it like I see it.

But I am very anxious about touching the race issue, and while I very much know that it's not anyone's job to educate me, if there are any black readers of mine that would be kind enough to let me run those episodes by them to make sure they are not downright awful before I post them, I would be immensly grateful. Maybe if people tell me there is no way this does not come across wrong, I'll cut it from the story. But help would be appreciated. Yeah.

So in short, it's my childish tantrum I have been dying to throw for years now, but packaged into text with four big guys liking the tantrum for no other reason than I want all four of them to be my troop.

I saw recently a post mocking the "strong female characters who are badass because they don't wear makeup and their only emotion is anger" and welp. That's gonna be it. Honestly I don't even feel upset that it looks so shallow.

One time a friend made me a birthday gift in a form of one visit to a "wreck it room" where they give you some plates and cheap old furniture and some other trash, and also baseball bats, crowbar (my favourite), a mallet and some other things. Blast heavy metal and such things through speakers. And let you break EVERYTHING in that room. Only walls are off limits, and I ended up even accidentally breaking a brick out while I was trying to break a stubborn chair leg in half. I destroyed everything they gave me in that one hour limit, even the guy who worked there was impressed. That's still one of my happiest memories.

And if channelling it makes for a shallow walking stereotype of a character, well, I don't give a fuck this time.

honestly even relaying all this made me feel better, sorry I dumped it all on you, I realize this might be not yours or anyone's cup of tea, but it's really something for me first and foremost. i think allowing myself to write dumb shallow angry shit might fix me just a little bit.