#going to see what happens if i paste it into ao3's thing

[pastafossa]

Right I’ve got the new chapter done in grammarly but for some reason, when I paste it back over into whatever the fuck this new verison of google docs is, it erases all of my paragraph breaks.

ALL OF THEM.

ONE MASSIVE BLOCK OF FUCKING TEXT.

[mrsbarnesblog]

my everything

masterlist ko-fi ao3

Summary: The last thing that Bucky ever expected to see was the love of his life from the past trapped in one of the Hydra bunkers in the cryofreeze chamber. Yet here he was almost two days later, staring at your still unconscious body through the window at the medical wing, imagining the horror and disgust on your face when you found out that he was no longer the innocent and happy boy you knew before.

Word count: 6.8K

Warnings: angst and fluff, I fucked up original timeline so there is no civil war in here, bucky needs and gets a hug, you're bucky's gf from the 40's, cryofreeze, self hate talk, happy end.

Author's note: enjoy💘

“Aren't you fucking tired of this?” Bucky growled as he burst into the common room where Sam, Steve, and Natasha were sitting. "If you set me up on another date, Wilson, I'll break your fucking wings."

Sam rolled his eyes and said, "Calm down, cyborg. Look at you, all angry and stressed out; you need to get laid! When was the last time you’ve been on a date?"

Steve raised his eyebrows in surprise as he glanced between his two friends.

"Sit down, Barnes." Nat nodded her head at the couch across from her. Bucky hesitated for a few seconds, as too many feelings were bubbling inside of him, but he obeyed and sat down, crossing his arms over his chest. “Now explain what happened.”

 "This idiot is trying to set me up again.” He said, nodding towards Sam. "And I told you I'm not interested."

 “But why? Don't you want to feel like back in the days and have some fun with pretty women? This Hydra shit clearly wasn’t good for you. You’re too tense and always mad. Go on a date, maybe you’ll find a good girl to spend some time with.” Sam genuinely wanted to help his friend, and he didn’t understand why Bucky was so mad about it.

The look on Bucky’s face was weird. Like he wanted to say something but, at the same time, didn’t want to share his thoughts. 

“Are you already dating someone?” Natasha leaned with her elbows on her knees and studied his face. There was definitely something that Bucky didn’t want to say.

Steve looked between the three of his friends, and when Nat asked Bucky a question, it was like a bulb turned on in his head.

 "Buck…" Bucky met Steve's eyes, holding eye contact for a few seconds, like they were talking about something that only they knew.

 “Hey!” Sam said, waving his hands. “What are you two doing? Do you know something, Rogers?”

 “Buck, is it because of her?” The blonde said it almost in a whisper. “You still remember, right?”

“Did you have a girlfriend before the war?” Natasha, as always, understood everything immediately, and it was funny to see how Sam’s mouth fell open in shock.

Bucky clenched and unclenched his hands in his lap, not sure if he should reveal the truth. He had kept it to himself for so long—ever since he escaped Hydra and the memories from the past started to flood his head. It was too painful to think about you. To think about the woman who was his whole life many years ago. He remembered everything, and now he sees you in his dreams almost every night. Sometimes in nightmares, sometimes in the good ones, about the life that you two would’ve had if he hadn’t gone to war.

“What the hell are you hiding from us?” Sam shouted again, trying to get attention.

 “I…” Bucky frowns, staring at his hands. “I had a girlfriend... before the army, before the Hydra.” He closed his eyes and tried to control his breathing. Just the thought of you hurt him, making him regret everything. That he left, that he didn’t marry you, and that the universe had this shitty plan.

 “And that’s why you don’t want to go out with someone?” Come on, man, how long has it been?  80 years? Get over it. It must have been another one of your girlfriends that you hooked up with when you were young.” He chuckled, looking between his friends, none of whom seemed happy with his choice of words.

 "Sam, don't—"

“You sound like an asshole.” 

 “Get over it?” Bucky didn’t let Steve or Nat finish their sentences before he barked at Sam, looking even more angry than before. “Just another one of my girlfriends? Do you have any idea what the fuck you're talking about, Wilson? " He looked like he was ready to kick his friend right in the face. “She wasn’t one of them. In fact, there was no “them”. In my entire life, I’ve never even touched another woman because I've been in love with Y/N since I was 14. We started dating when I turned 18, and I proposed before I had to go to the war.”

Bucky’s emotions quickly changed as the hot rage turned into a longing for memories and feelings. He felt a lump in his throat, so he reached into his pocket for his wallet, from which he pulled out your old and shabby photo, gently running his finger over your face.

“Y/N was everything to me. She said yes, and I promised her that I would return so we could get married. I imagined that I would spend my whole life with her, you know? I don't need any other woman. I do not want it. I still love her, and I don't care if either of you find it funny.

The room fell into heavy silence. Steve just looked out the window, remembering the times when the three of you went to Coney Island, and he was always the third wheel. You were his friend too, and the aching feeling in his chest was too heavy.

Sam felt a little bit awkward after saying these things about your relationships. He wanted to tease Bucky, not be rude.

Natasha was the one who took the first step when she stretched the arm so Bucky would give her the photo. “You two look so cheesy. She’s really gorgeous.” She smirked, looking at the old black-and-white photo of you two sitting on the bench. Your back was almost lying on Bucky’s body, and his arms were wrapped around you. It seemed like you were talking about something and enjoying the private moment. Bucky had the biggest smile Natasha has ever seen on his face, as he was looking at you with heart eyes.

 “Can I see?” Sam finally asked, nodding at the photograph in Natasha's hands. She passed him the photo and Bucky moved in his place, feeling a little bit uncomfortable about revealing this part of his life. 

“You two look cute. Weird to see a smile on your face.” Sam chuckled.

“Where did you find this photo?” Steve leaned closer to the picture, immediately remembering the day you and Bucky took it and the way Bucky has had it with him ever since.

 “I took it to the war. Always had it in a jacket, even on missions. She was with me that day on the train. I think Hydra found this in my pocket. When I ran away from there, I found a box with my stuff; the photo was there.”

 “Have you… tried to find something about her?” Steve lifted his head, studying his friend's reaction.

 “Yeah,” Bucky sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose, “I don’t know how, but I didn’t find anything. Two years after my fall, there was no record of her. No marriage certificate, no place of residence, no place of work. Nothing. Like she just disappeared.” He shook his head in despair. 

 “But it's impossible.” Steve frowned, giving the photo back. “A person can't just disappear and leave nothing behind.”

 "I don't know," Bucky shrugged, looking back at the photo for a second and then slipping it back into his wallet. "Maybe it's for the best. I don't know how I would come to terms with the news of her death.”

It’s been almost two weeks since that conversation, and luckily for Bucky, Sam didn’t attempt to set him up with anyone anymore.

Earlier that day, Tony announced that his new technology had spotted some weird activity in something that looked like an old and hidden Hydra base. It was pretty much abandoned, but there were signs of small energy consumption, as if something was still constantly working. That’s why the team of Bucky, Steve, Sam, and Tony had to check it out and destroy any possible danger.

After being free from Hydra, Bucky didn’t take part in many missions because the team agreed that it would be better for him to heal and stay far away from triggers. But this base brought up many concerns: it was hidden far away, there was no information about it in nonofficial papers, and even Bucky himself had never heard about it. Tony insisted that someone with knowledge of the Hydra system should go there too.

When the four of them arrived on the quinjet at something that looked like a well-hidden abandoned bunker, they decided not to split up and go through the main and only entrance.

“Be careful; we don’t know that they might hide in here.” Steve said, going in first with a shield in front of him. Bucky and Sam went after him, holding rifles and checking the big and almost empty room.

“They should clean in here, kinda dusty.” Tony chuckled in his usual playful voice. 

“It’s not a good time for your jokes, Stark.” Steve was always a little too serious during missions, and Tony really liked pushing his buttons. “I see the light in the other room.” He whispered, carefully opening the door. 

“Holy shit.” Sam and Tony spoke at the same time when all four of them entered the giant room.

There were five big glass machines that were a little bit foggy and had a little lightning in them.

“What is this?” Steve ran closer to one of them and saw that there was a man inside. “Oh my god, there is a man in here... It looks like he’s alive.”

“There is a folder called “The Winter Soldier Program” with personal information.” Sam said, picking up a file from the shelf in the corner of the room. “George Harris, 27 from New York. Kathleen Hill, 21 from New York…” He read, mumbling to himself.

“It’s a cryostasis chamber. Hydra used it to freeze me.” Bucky lowered his rifle, coming closer to one of the chambers. Another man. “It lowers your body temperature to the point that you can be kept like that for many years. Hydra– “ Bucky went silent when he got to another glass camera. 

“Barnes? Why is there—” Sam didn’t finish his words when the sound of Bucky’s weapon falling on the cold concrete filled the room. 

“No-no-no, please, no!” He whispered, moving closer to the glass. He couldn’t believe what he saw. 

You were right in front of him, with closed eyes and too pale skin. That was impossible. It’s not you. There was no chance that you somehow ended up with Hydra. 

Bucky felt like he was unable to breathe. He tried to inhale some air, but the lump in his throat was too big. The tears blurred his vision; he didn’t hear anything around him, as your almost lifeless body was the only thing that he thought about. You, his sweet girl, somehow ended up trapped with monsters, and he couldn’t do anything to save you from it. 

“Bucky!” Two pairs of hands dragged him from the chamber, and the blurry vision of his best friend was now visible in front of him. “Bucky, listen to me! You should calm down, buddy. Just breathe, okay?” Steve deeply inhaled and exhaled to help Bucky, and after a few minutes, he was finally able to speak.

“T-that’s impossible, Steve. She shouldn’t be there! She should’ve found another man and lived a happy life with her family!” He said in a shaking voice, angrily wiping away tears from his face. 

“I don’t know how this happened, Buck; I really don’t. But she may be alive there.” Steve supportively squeezed Bucky’s shoulder. 

“We can’t just take these people out. We should transport them to the tower and find the safest way to unfreeze them.” Tony said in a serious voice, not joking around anymore. He walked closer to the chambers, studying each of them. “It looks like they are working on their own power, and this one, “he pointed at the one that was dark and with water drops from the inside. “Doesn’t work anymore. The man is probably dead.” 

“Are there any chances of getting them out of there alive?” Sam glared at Bucky, who was just staring at your peaceful but haggard face through the glass.

“I don’t know, but me and Banner will do everything we can.”

It took another day to find a way to move four of the still-working chambers to the compound and ten more hours to defrost everyone. and to say that Bucky was completely stressed out and exhausted was an understatement. He didn’t sleep at all, staying in the room near the lab to get all the news as soon as possible. He walked around the room for hours, overthinking everything—what will happen if you die or if you survive? Is it really better for you to wake up and see all the damage that he has done for the past years? To see the empty shell of the person you loved in the past?

“Barnes!” Tony blasted through the doors with a grin on his face. “We did it.”

“You did it?” Bucky’s whole body was buzzing with energy and anxiety. “Where is she? Is she alive? Is she conscious? Can I see her?”

“Wow-wow, calm down. She is alive, but you can’t see or visit her right now. Dr. Cho has to run many tests to find out whether your lovebird is healthy or not.” Tony nodded his head toward the corridor so Bucky would follow him. “We put each of them into a different room, and your Blonde Bestie insisted on putting Y/N into the best and the biggest one. There is a special window through which you can see her, but she cannot see you from the inside. So you can be as creepy as you want to until she gets better.” Stark slapped Bucky on the shoulder to show some kind of support when they stopped in front of the said window. 

You were lying on the bed, surrounded by too many wires and monitors. Dr. Cho was standing above you, writing something down, and checking the device near your head.

She said something aloud, probably talking to FRIDAY, and came out of the room. 

“Oh, Mr.Barnes, I heard that Y/N was your girlfriend, right?” She smiled, and Bucky slightly nodded, not being able to completely drag his attention from your body. “I’ll tell you this: it’s my most difficult and unique case, but she’s a strong one. Her body heals faster than other people’s from cryo. I believe she’ll be fully awake tomorrow.” 

“Thank you, Dr.Cho.” Bucky felt a little bit better now that he had more hope that you could really be back. Dr.Cho gave him another smile and left to check on her other patients. 

“I have to find out if these people have families. Did Y/N have someone who might be alive?” Tony asked. 

“No, she didn’t.”

“I’ll go, and you, Barnes, will stay away from her for now, understood?” He pointed a finger into Bucky’s face. 

“Yes. I’ll just watch from here.” 

You were alive. You were awake. Bucky saw with his own eyes as your body started moving and you slowly sat on the bed, confused by your surroundings. He saw panic on your face because you were clearly disoriented and scared to be alone in an unknown place. 

As fast as he could, he found Dr. Cho, who was in the room with Steve and Natasha. When he, choking on all the emotions, told them about you, it was a mess. 

Dr. Cho and a few other nurses ran to your room to check your condition because you were the first one to open your eyes.

Bucky, Steve, and Nat stood on the other side of the window. Bucky wasn’t able to fully convince himself that it was true that you were so close to him. It felt like a dream, like a weird picture that his brain created to comfort him. 

“She’s okay, Buddy.” Steve placed a hand on Bucky’s shoulder because it seemed like he didn’t even blink or breathe. “You can see her soon.”

“No.” He mumbled.

“What?” His friend’s head shot in his direction.

“Someone else should talk to her first. Tell her about my past. Maybe she won’t even want to see me after everything I’ve done.”

“I can go and talk to her first.” Natasha softly smiled. She knew the feeling when you’re afraid that someone will leave you because of your past. “I think it’s better for Y/N to first find out that she woke up in the new century and that she was cryofrozen for many years. I’ll tell her that Steve is alive, and then me and you can both tell her about Bucky.” 

Bucky just nodded to her words, still not being able to look at anything besides you. He wasn’t sure that after you find out all the truth, you’ll allow him to even be around you, so for now, he tried to memorize you as much as he could. 

Since the moment you opened your eyes, everything felt unknown and different. You couldn’t explain it, but something had changed. You didn’t know where you were, what time it was, how you ended up in that place, or who all these people were. You felt scared as too many doctors crowded your room and fussed around, talking about tests and medical procedures. 

The young woman who seemed to be in charge was actually really sweet. After only you and her were left in the room, she sat on your bed with a pile of clothes in her hands and smiled at you. 

“So, Y/N, my name is Dr. Cho, and I’m here to help you heal faster and without any consequences.” 

“Where am I?” Your voice was too raspy and harsh. It felt like you swallowed a glass of sand. 

She sighed, looking at her journal. “It’s hard to explain, but I promise that there’s nothing to worry about. You are safe. In a few minutes, someone will visit you to talk about everything and answer any of your questions. Now, I was told to give you these clothes so it would be more comfortable for you. You can change in the bathroom right there; there is also anything you might need like a toothbrush, soap, and so on.” She pointed at the door in the corner of the room. 

You stayed silent until Dr. Cho left your room, and then slowly, feeling kind of scared to move around this place, you went to the bathroom to change out of the hospital gown. 

The bathroom looked even weirder than the main room; you had never seen such furniture and interiors. And when you unfolded your new clothes, it took you a few seconds to figure it out. It was some kind of soft pants and a large t-shirt. What kind of clothes was it? Yes, they were actually comfortable, but it wasn’t something that you saw in the stores. 

While you were brushing your teeth, your brain was working too hard trying to figure out what the hell was going on, until you heard someone calling your name. 

“Hey, Y/N, my name is Natasha.” The pretty red-headed woman was standing near your bed with a tray and food in her hands. 

“Please, tell me what’s going on. Where am I? Why does everything look so strange here?” You said in a desperate voice, you almost wanted to scream because you woke up several hours ago, but no one told you a single thing.

“Don’t be nervous, honey. Let's sit on the bed; you’ll eat your special meal, and I’ll tell you everything you want.” She was so nice and genuine, so you nodded and sat down. 

Natasha placed a tray near you, and you saw that it was your favorite food of all time. You took a bite, and your taste buds were immediately filled with the taste of the meal that James cooked you almost every day. James. It was his recipe. The tears flooded your eyes when all of the memories about your dead boyfriend returned to your head. Yeah, how could you forget that it had been at least two years since he was gone? 

“Y/N? What happened?” Natasha’s worried voice distracted you. 

“It just reminded me of someone. I felt like I was home, and it hurts me because nothing is the same anymore.” You wiped your tears away, taking another bite. 

“I promise you that everything is going to be okay. You are not alone here.” You frowned at her words but still nodded. “So ask whatever you want to.” 

“Where am I, and why does everything look so different?”

“You are at the Avengers Tower, located in Manhattan, New York City. I know that might sound ridiculous, but you were in the cryostasis chamber up until now. It’s 2023, and a lot of things have changed in the world; that's why it might be confusing.”

You stayed silent for a few seconds, overthinking Natasha’s words. “It can’t be true. I can’t be more than one hundred years old now. And I look the same.” 

“This is how cryostasis works—it freezes the body so it can survive many years without any changes. Now tell me how you ended up with Hydra. What is the last thing you remember before waking up here?” 

“Back in the 40s, I was a nurse. My– my boyfriend— he died during the war.” You stopped because of the lump in your throat. It was too hard to bring back these memories because it was the first time you said these words out loud. “He died, and then my closest friend died too, and I just had no one left. I was alone, and I didn’t even know what to live for because all of my dreams about family and a happy life with the person I loved died too.” Natasha put her hand over yours on the bed and gave you a supportive squeeze. “Then one day in our hospital, scientists were looking for people who would like to test new serums. I decided that I had nothing to lose, so me and a few other nurses signed in.” 

“Kathleen, Josh, Adam, and Frank, right?” The woman in front of you gave you a sad smile.

“Yes, how do you know that?” 

“We found them with you. Adam’s camera was broken, so he died a long time ago, but the rest of them are here too, but, unfortunately, they haven’t regained consciousness yet.” 

You nodded. Your food was now done and set aside, and you sat on the bed more comfortably, bringing your knees to your chest. “These scientists were running some tests on us in the lab that they brought us in. It felt weird, and I remember that Kathleen always complained that it was painful. The last thing that happened was that they told us to step into a weird-looking machine that was meant to be a part of some kind of experiment. That’s it.”

“It was Hydra. A terrorist organization that tried to rule the world. They were evil, and you were lucky to get out of there alive.” Natasha pursed her lips. “Thank you for telling me this.” 

You two sat in silence for a few seconds until she looked over her shoulder at the weird-looking mirror that took up almost a whole wall. 

“Is anything wrong?” You furrowed.

“I have to tell and show you something really important, but everyone is worried about how you are going to react to this.” She studied your face with a weird expression. 

“Is there anything more crazy than me being in another century after I was frozen?” You tried to smile, but Natasha just nodded. 

“I’ll be right back. Please, try to breathe, okay?” She stood from your bed, took the tray, and left. 

Natasha came back, and behind her was the last person you ever expected to see again. You jumped on your feet, feeling like your eyes were lying to you. 

“This—this can’t be true... No, Natasha—Steve, you died.” You mumbled under your breath. Your heart rate was way higher than usual, and it felt like you were drowning. You put your hand over your eyes, as your body started shaking. It’s just a dream. It’s just a weird fucking dream.

Two large hands wrapped around your body, pulling you into the hard chest. “Sh-s, Y/N, breathe, just breathe.” His familiar voice filled your ears, and you started crying harder, gripping his shirt. He was rocking you from side to side like a baby, while your tears and sobs filled the silent room.

“What– how– how is this possible? You crushed the plane into ice.” You shattered, tears running down your face.

“The Super Soldier serum saved me. The S.H.I.E.L.D. found my body 12 years ago.” Steve loosened his arms around you, allowing you to look up at him. He was exactly the same. This blonde hair, these light blue eyes, and that soft smile that he always had for you. “Please, sit back on the bed. We have a lot to talk about.” His face was now more serious. Even though he was extremely happy to get back his second closest best friend, he knew that Bucky was dying without you.

Steve and Bucky both looked at your interaction with Natasha, and it was obvious that everything Bucky wanted was for you to be near him. He looked through that window without any distraction, and his face lit up with a small smile when you tasted the food that he cooked for you and became emotional. He knew that you would appreciate it.

“About what?” You wiped your face with the back of your hand and sat down, holding Steve's hand. Natasha, who was still standing in the middle of the room, passed him a thick folder and left. Steve sat near you and gave you a supportive smile. 

“Bucky.” 

You froze and snatched your hand out of his. 

“Steve, no. Please—” You wrapped your hands around your body, as if you were instantly trying to hide from the pain that was aching in your chest. “Please, don’t hurt me anymore. I can’t handle that. Talking about him w-when he’s not with me anymore.” The sods started to get out of you, and you hid your face from Steve’s soft and apologizing eyes.

“He is alive.” Steve’s hands fell on your shoulders, and he lowered his head, trying to make you look him in the eyes.

“Don’t lie to me! He is dead; I saw the reports; I got the letter from Phillips saying that he’s sorry for our loss!” You particularly yelled at your friend. 

“Y/N, listen to me, okay? Bucky is alive. He is here. Behind that door, he’s watching us right now.” You were shaking your head in denial. 

That was impossible. You knew all this story; Steve himself told you what happened that day. There was no chance for Bucky to survive the fall from that height in the middle of nowhere. Yet here was Steve, sitting right before you. His big blue and soft eyes were looking into your eyes, and you didn’t see a single sign of hesitation or lying in there. He was so genuine that you wanted to believe that your boyfriend was, in fact, a few meters away from you.

“How? And why? James– he would’ve been with me if he were alive. Why isn’t he here?” You sobbed, and then the realization came to you. “That food—the food that Natsha brought me. It tasted exactly like he made it.”

“Bucky thought that it might comfort you. He found you in that laboratory, he has been near you since that day, and he saw that you were scared and disoriented when you woke up. And that's why I am here. Bucky insisted that I should talk to you first and tell you everything. He is afraid that you might not see him anymore after finding out everything that is written here.” Steve picked up the folder and put it on your lap. 

“The Winter Soldier” was written on top of the old-looking piece of paper, and for some reason you felt something weird in your chest.

“I want to let you know that whatever is in here, it cannot make me hate him.” You mumbled, hesitating to open the folder. “What’s in there, Steve? Tell me everything.”

“These are the papers that S.H.I.E.L.D. and Hydra had on the Winter Soldier. Everything that happened to him: experiments, torture, assassinations, crimes. This is what happened to Bucky after the fall. This is what Hydra did to him over these years.” 

You felt a lump in your throat when you opened the first page and saw Bucky’s photo from the army. But nothing prepared you for everything you read and saw after that. He wasn’t even James or Bucky anymore. He was a Soldier. An Asset. Someone without an identity. All the detailed descriptions of the medical procedures, brainwashing, electroshock, torture, and punishments with attached photos made you want to vomit and cry hysterically. You couldn’t stop crying when your shaking hands took a picture of the love of your life sitting shirtless and unconscious on some kind of stool with wires attached to his head. 

How could someone do that? How could someone torture a person almost to death and then just write about it like it was a fucking dairy? 

“His arm, it’s metal. Why is it made from metal?” Your teary-red eyes shoot back to Steve’s face. 

“Bucky lost it during the fall. They gave him a new one, but it causes him a lot of pain. Physical and mental.”

“I don’t— Steve, I don’t understand.” You took another picture with Bucky standing in his full black costume and a mask, not a single emotion on his face. “Why did they do this? For what?” 

“Hydra wanted to have the perfect asset. Killing machine. To commit crimes, kill unwanted people, and basically rule the world.” Steve ran a hand through his hair, looking at the floor. “They made Bucky the best. They completely cleared his head from the memories of his past; they trained him to be invincible and invisible. They had a special combination of words to control him, so he would always come back and do as he was told.”

You closed the file and moved it aside, closing your face with your hands while you were crying.

“And he thinks that I can reject him?” You whispered.

“Y/N, please try to understand what such things can do to your brain. Bucky goes to therapy, but he probably would never be able to fully heal from this experience.” His hand fell on your shoulder and squeezed it slightly. “Bucky always was a good person; that's why right now he feels so much guilt that it’s unimaginable. Even if nothing of this is his fault, he can’t forgive himself for these murders and damage. He has PTSD, nightmares, and a lot of trust issues.”

“I understand, but I would’ve never rejected him. He’s everything that I had, and when I lost him, it felt like hell.” You took a deep breath, looking Steve in the eyes. “Please, let me see him. I need it, and he needs it too.” Steve’s eyes softened at you. He almost forgot the love that his two best friends had for each other. 

“Give me a minute, okay?” He smiled, kissed your head, and left your room, leaving you alone with your thoughts.

You were really going to see the man that you thought you had lost forever in a few seconds. It was almost three years for you, but almost eighty for him. A wave of anxiety washed over you when you thought that maybe he doesn’t feel the same anymore and doesn’t have the same feelings as you do. You almost went down a rabbit hole until the door started to open. 

You slowly stood up, feeling a little bit uneasy. Even though you and Steve were just talking about it, seeing Bucky alive felt unreal. Your eyes were sliding up and down his face to remember every little part. He looked different, more mature, with a broad chest and shoulders and long, silky hair. 

Bucky’s heart was pounding in his ears, and his mouth was completely dry while you were observing him. You had tears in your eyes, and your lower lip was trembling when you tried to hold yourself from crying out loud. You were in some baggy clothes that Nat found for you, but you still looked fucking gorgeous. Still the most beautiful girl on the whole planet. 

“Doll…” Bucky’s raspy voice filled the room, and it was everything you needed. 

In just a second, you ran to him, falling right into his body. Arms wrapped around his shoulders, and your face hidden into his neck. 

As soon as Bucky finally hugged your smaller body and felt that it was real and that you were real, he broke down. Every last piece of strength went through the window as the tears rolled down his cheeks, probably soaking your t-shirt.

He wanted to drop to his knees and beg for your forgiveness for all of the awful things that he had done. He didn’t deserve you anymore, not with this much blood on his hands. But Bucky couldn’t do what he wanted because your grip on him was so strong that he wasn’t even able to move away for an inch. 

“James…” Your quiet voice filled his ears, and it sent shivers down his spine. Only you and his ma called him that, and he missed it so fucking much.

Bucky’s hands moved from your waist a little bit lower, and you viewed it as an opportunity to get even closer. Your legs instantly wrapped around his body, and Bucky, making sure that you wouldn’t fall, went to the bed and sat down with you on his knees. 

“I’m so sorry... I’m so sorry for everything that I’ve done.” He sobbed, shaking his head. You pulled away a little bit, finally meeting Bucky face-to-face. 

“Don’t you dare apologize for the things that you weren’t able to control, James!” Your voice suddenly became rough, filled with so much anger toward the people who hurt your precious boy. His hand on your waist tightened, and you slid your own to cup Bucky’s face. “I want to kill every one of them. Everyone who hurt you, who punished you,” Soft fingertips traced the delicate skin of the templates where, as you remember from the photos, wires with electricity were placed. “You didn’t deserve to go through this, James. I wish I was there for you.” 

“You were always with me. Even when they wiped me, I still had someone in my head. A woman with a soft voice, who told me that I'm strong and that it will end soon. I would’ve died without it.” You both were looking into each other's teary eyes, both feeling too much love and desire. 

Your head slightly tilted towards his, connecting your foreheads, and for a few seconds, it felt like home. Like nothing happened and you two were just having a lazy morning in bed.

The calloused hand on the side of your face brought you back to reality. Bucky’s beautiful blue eyes were looking into yours, and, sharing one thought, you both moved closer and connected your lips. The kiss was so soft, slow, and gentle, like you had the whole time in the world. It was this type of kiss that said that you both were there and alive. It was a reminder of the love that you had for each other. Reassurance, that no matter what, you will be there.

“I missed you so fucking much, doll. Since the day I first remembered everything, all I could think about was you. Even tried to find you, but there was not a single document. I started to believe that you just found a man, changed your last name, and moved away from that mess.” You were so close to each other, not wanting to split up even for a second. Your hands were moving up and down Bucky’s hard chest while he was rubbing the soft skin of your cheek with his thumb.

“Are you joking, James? No one was able to replace you. The only people I talked to during that time were your mom and Becca.” His facial expression slightly changed at the mention of his family, and you placed a soft kiss on his stubble cheek. “I should’ve been the one who took care of them, but I was nothing without you, and Winnie almost made me move in with them. That’s why I jumped at the opportunity to be a volunteer for these tests.” 

Bucky shook his head, his eyes again full of regret and pain. “I hate that it happened because of me.”

“At least I’m here right now. With you.” You smiled, sliding your hand into his dark, long locks. “You know, James, you look really good for someone who’s older than one hundred years old. I like your hair. And stubble.” His eyes rolled back at the feeling of your nails on his scalp. It had been so long since someone touched him without an intention to hurt him, and the realization of that made your heart swell with the need to take care of your boyfriend. 

“You know that you’re one year younger than me, right?” Your favorite little smirk in the whole world appeared on Bucky’s lips, and you smiled, moving a little bit closer to his body. The metal hand on your waist tightened, and you realized that you hadn't seen it in person yet. 

Your right hand reached behind you, grabbing a hard wrist that was covered in leather. Bucky’s body immediately froze under you, and his eyes snapped open. 

“Doll, no… You don’t have to...” 

“I want to. Give me your hand, James.” You said without any hesitation. Bucky looked you in the eyes for a few seconds, but then brought his metal hand between your bodies. “It’s just me, okay? I’m not scared, and I want to know everything.” You wrapped both of your hands around his hand and then gently started to take off the glove. 

The dark metal with beautiful golden stripes was shining under the bright light of the room. Your mouth slightly opened when you moved each finger with interest. Your gentle hands slid higher, rolling up the sleeve of the red henley Bucky was wearing. It was so smooth, without any sharp details, just an amazing and mind-blowing mechanism. 

“That’s so beautiful.” You mumbled in awe. Suddenly the plates under your hands moved, and a quiet whirring sound filled the room. You shot your eyes back at Bucky in shock, only to see that he was already looking at you with so much love that you almost melted. “Did you do that?” 

“It’s a new arm, not from Hydra. It reacts to my emotions. No one ever touched it without any fear.” You almost missed that last sentence, but the hurt in Bucky’s voice made you grab his face with your hands to get his whole attention.

“Listen to me, James. I’m not afraid of you. I won’t reject you. You are everything that I want. You still have the biggest and kindest heart of the guy that I met many years ago, and I’ll do everything to prove to you this.” The metal hand carefully touched your hand on the side of his face. “I love you. I love you so much, James.”

“I love you too, Doll. More than anything in this life,” Your lips crushed into each other, now sharing a more passionate and deep kiss. You slightly tilted your head, allowing Bucky to part your lips with his tongue and playfully bite you. It was almost too overwhelming, and you both were completely lost in each other until you finally needed to breathe. 

“Stay here with me, please. I don’t want you to leave.” You whined, trying to push your big and strong super soldier onto the bed. 

“I won’t leave, baby.” He chuckled, allowing you to push him back. You happily giggled and laid near him, interlacing your bodies together. 

You two were just staying in your own little bubble on your bed for what seemed like forever, talking about everything and nothing at the same time, until you finally fell asleep, feeling happy and peaceful in each other's arms.  

[red-riot-unbreakable-heart]

Shoto Todoroki x Reader | First Kiss ❄️🔥💋 PART 2

Part 1: Linked Here!

AO3: Linked Here :)

Fandom: My Hero Academia

Ship: Shoto Todoroki x Fem Reader! 💋

Genre: Fluff, Romance, S*xual Tension, Making Out

CW: MDNI!, A18+, kissing, romance, sexual tension, semi-spicy scenes, lemon

Link to My Master List

Scenes from the afternoon hookup replay in your mind over and over as you sit in the library at a battered old desk in the history section. All you can think about is Shoto’s mouth. And his hands. And his abs!! And his sweet face.

You twiddle your pen in your hand as you try to draft out an essay for class. Unfortunately, every time you try to jot down a few thoughts your mind goes blissfully blank and you remember the tender way he spoke to you.

"How am I going to get anything done now, knowing that you can kiss like this?"

“You’re so beautiful. Your skin is so soft…I never realized how great it would be to touch you.”

“Find me later so we can discuss this.”

You look down at your watch excitedly – 7:55 PM. You eagerly wait for Shoto to appear so the two of you can talk and – with any luck – canoodle amongst the history textbooks. You sit patiently as the time ticks by.

Soon it’s 8:30 PM. You’re not worried, though. Shoto probably assumed you’d want to get some work done first.

9:15 PM rolls around and you start to get worried. You try to distract yourself with school work as doubt creeps into your mind.

10 PM – Shoto still hasn’t showed.

“Shit shit shit.” You check your phone again and again as you wade through the endless wave of homework your teachers have assigned. You keep losing yourself in a math problem or in a passage of your History textbook, only to remember with a jolt that you were expecting to see Shoto and the bastard hasn’t showed.

At 10:30 PM you realize with a sinking feeling that it’s almost past curfew. You pack up your things and prepare to head back to the dorms. There’s a heavy feeling in the pit of your stomach that you can’t shake.

You slide your books into your bag as a anxious thoughts dance through your mind like annoying fruit flies: Does Shoto regret your mid-afternoon hookup? Is he going to pretend it never happened? Did you push him too far? Does he think you’re a slut for stripping off your shirt and basically pressing his face into your naked breasts!? The synapses of your brain jump through dozens of equally horrid and embarrassing scenarios as you march back to your dorm room, blushing furiously with humiliation.

You run through the afternoon’s events in your head for what feels like the hundredth time, trying to find a clue as to why Shoto would have left you waiting alone in the library. Your cheeks burn hotter as you recall the gentle way Shoto had kissed your neck before leaning in to capture your lips in one of his first kisses. "How am I going to get anything done now, knowing that you can kiss like this?" You shiver as you think back to how gentle he was, how each caress felt so loving and intimate.

You shake your head to clear it. Shoto must have a valid excuse for not meeting you in the library as he had promised – no boy could kiss someone that intimately and then instantly cast her aside, right?

Before long, you’re walking through the doors of Class 1A’s dorm building. You shiver with discomfort as you recall how earlier that day you essentially scaled the side of a building for a boy. Does Shoto think you’re an absolute fool with the extremes you went to for a quick make out session? You hope not.

You walk up the stairs and past the common area. You see most of Class 1A studying quietly. Sero, Izuku, Kirishima and Ida sit around one of the kitchen tables reviewing their math homework while some of the girls compare English notes on the couch. To your relief, Shoto isn’t there. Mina waves to you enthusiastically, beckoning you to join her and YaMomo as they review the finer points of Hamlet. You politely decline and make a beeline for your room. You turn the key in the lock and it clicks – within moments, you are blessedly alone.

You toss your heavy book bag to the ground and prepare to wallow in self-pity. It’s 10:56pm and Shoto still hasn’t reached out to you. Your phone is vacant of text messages and your brain is absolutely fried from schoolwork.

You dim your room lights and switch on the favorite fairy lights for some peaceful ambiance. Time for some self-care, bitch! You think resolutely as you swap your uniform for your favorite pair of pajamas. You toss your phone to the floor with abandon and climb into your comfy bed. You breathe in deeply, allowing yourself to revel in the coziness of the dorm room.

You take out your five-minute bullet journal and write a quick list of things you're grateful for: 1. The opportunity to study at UA 2. Your lovely and encouraging friends and classmates 3. Your cozy room and the roof over your head 4. Shoto’s mouth 5. Shoto’s abs 6. Shoto’s goddamn hard AF dick

Um. No.

You snap the journal shut before you get too derailed.

You pull your comforter over your head and sit in silence for a moment. You’ve never been the kind of person to go completely boy-crazy. You always used to make fun of those girls who would go gaga over pretty boys and their texts and their kisses. But as you recall the searing way that Shoto kissed your lips earlier that day, you suddenly understand what all the boy-crazed girly hype was all about. Oh my god. You have a crush. A big sloppy embarrassing crush.

In the silence of your room, you suddenly here a buzzing noise coming from the general direction of your book bag. You struggle to disentangle yourself from your sheets and your journal goes flying. You ignore its crash landing as you slip from your bed and collect your phone from where it lays abandoned on the carpeted floor.

It’s Shoto.

Your heart skips.

Todoroki: Y/N. Are you awake?

You bite your lip, unsure how to respond. Did Shoto just send you his version of “U up?”

Y/N: Yes, I’m still up.

Todoroki: I know it’s late, but can I stop by?

You tense. Oh God – he’s going to come by to tell you that he’s not interested. He’s going to thank you for your time making out and say that you probably should avoid hooking up in the future because it’s a huge distraction. You’re sure that whatever he has to say is going to be negative and leave you feeling embarrassed. Why else would he have skipped out on your rendezvous in the library?

You take a deep breath. You have always been fairly practical with a mind for strategy, two qualities that had really set you apart when you had taken the UA entrance exams. You know that the best course of action here is to rip off the Band-Aid sooner rather than later. Better to know how he feels about your hookup now

Your heart sinks as you type out:

Y/N: Sure, I’ll leave the door unlocked for you. Just come in. Try not to be seen by anyone.

Todoroki: Of course. See you shortly.

Your heart beats double time as you look down at yourself. Your pajama set consists of a silky blue top with matching shorts that don’t leave much to the imagination. You chew on your thumb nervously – should you change into something more appropriate? No – Shoto has seen your boobs. A little bit of leg is not going to kill the half hot half cold hero in training.

You quickly remake your bed and kick your book bag beneath your desk so that the floor is clear. You plop down on your smooth comforter and wait, knotting your hands together as you anticipate Shoto’s arrival.

A few anxious minutes pass, and then you hear gentle footsteps pad down the hallway outside your door. The knob turns quietly, and in a moment Shoto Todoroki steps across your threshold, quietly closing the door behind him. He reaches down to turn the lock with a gentle snap of his wrist.

You take him in – he’s wearing a pair of grey sweatpants and a soft white t-shirt. You’ve never seen him dressed so casually before and you assume that these are what he wears as pajamas in the privacy of his own dorm room. His hair is tousled and damp from a recent shower, and the burned side of his face shines where he’s clearly applied some kind of scar cream or moisturizer. His outfit projects a comfy air, but his expression is dark and stormy. Your heartbeat quickens in fear – what could possibly have caused him to be in such a tempestuous mood? Was this about your kissing?

You bite at your lip with worry. But when your eyes lock, his expression softens. In two quick strides, he’s at the bed. He leans in close so that your noses almost touch.

“Hi.” He says softly, before dipping his mouth to meet yours. You blink in surprise as your mouths melt together. His eyes flutter shut as he sinks into the kiss. Pleasure radiates up and down your spine as you kiss him back. He places both his palms on your hips and pulls you closer, letting out a small moan of satisfaction as he slides his tongue into your mouth. How silly you feel for thinking he didn’t want you like this!

After a few moments, you break apart.

“Hey there.” You whisper, bringing your hands up to cup his beautiful jaw. He leans in to kiss you again and you hold him in place. He stops and looks down at you inquisitively.

“I waited for you in the library, you didn’t show.” You say slowly, softly.

“My father decided to take me through some drills in one of the school’s gyms. I only finished a half hour ago.” His expression becomes dull as he speaks. “I’m sorry to leave you waiting. I wanted to see you - but I’m not allowed on my phone during training.”

Relief must have flooded your features, because he tilts his head to the side questioningly. You hold back a giggle – the way his head is tilted makes him look like a sweet dog asking its owner for a treat.

“What’s wrong?”

You sigh and pull yourself further onto the bed, patting the spot next to you as an invitation. Shoto climbs up next to you, sinking into the deliciously soft fabric. His eyes widen slightly in surprise.

“This is so comfortable.” He says, pressing his palm into the plush fabric beneath him. You recall his sparse traditional bedroom and realize that he’s never laid on a proper puffy mattress before.

“Hold on – it gets better.” You say pushing him off the bed so you can pull down the covers. You slip beneath the comforter and gesture for him to rejoin you. He climbs in clumsily, unsure how to position himself within the sheets. You prop a pillow beneath his shoulders as he lays down on his side. You toss the comforter over the two of you and lay across from him, feet almost touching beneath the warm layers of bedding.

“Cozy?” You ask as Shoto settles into the bed.

“Yeah.” He says in quiet voice, propping himself up on an elbow. “I always thought beds like this were excessive but…maybe there’s some merit to this.” He eyes a blue Squirtle plush that sits next to you in the bed. “Can I…hold that?”

You grin, biting back a laugh as you reach over to grab the Pokémon plush. “This is Squirtle – he’s one of my favorite plushies.” You hold up the stuffed animal and wiggle it in front of Shoto’s eyes as if it’s dancing. “Squirtle, Squirtle” you say in a low tone, trying to emulate the television character’s voice the best you can.

Shoto gives you a weird look. “I don’t get it. Why are you just repeating its name in a strange voice?”

“Shoto…have you…have never seen Pokémon!?” You almost screech in disbelief, before throwing a hand over your mouth to quiet yourself. You quickly remember that you are in the dorms and the walls aren’t super thick.

“No, I wasn’t allowed to watch television unless it was about Pro hero work.” Shoto says, a tinge of sadness flowing along with his words. “But it looks cute and round and I really just want to hold it and squish it?”

“Yeah, that’s the general reaction to plushies. Dude, we need to get you that whale pillow you liked on Pinterest. You need more cuteness in your life.”

“Well I have you, don’t I?” Shoto smiles softly. “You bring more than enough cute into my life.” He reaches out and grabs the plush from your hands and squishes it a bit. “But this is pretty nice, too.”

Your face grows hot at the compliment. Shoto tucks the Squirtle under his arm and shifts around in the sheets until he finds a comfortable position. He looks adorable and soft as he cradles the bright plush in his strong, muscular hands.

When he finally settles in, he looks up at you enquiringly. “What’s wrong?” He repeats, looping you both back to the conversation form earlier.

“So…” You sigh with embarrassment. “When you didn’t show up and I didn’t hear from you…” You pause and Shoto gives Squirtle a squeeze. “I thought you didn’t want to see me again. Or at least that you didn’t want to make out with me again.”

“Oh.” Shoto wasn’t expecting this. “I thought I made it very clear how…enthusiastically…I enjoyed our time together this afternoon. I didn’t realize I had left any room for you to question my attraction to you.”

“That’s nice to hear…but when you didn’t show at the library or send a text, I assumed the worst. My mind kind of went into full-blown panic mode. I thought maybe once you had time to reflect on our hookup, that you realized you didn’t like it or that you didn’t really like me. To be perfectly honest, I’ve never felt that way before. Usually something like this wouldn’t bother me.” You take a deep, steadying breath. “But I think I really like you and want to be close to you, and the thought that you might not feel the same was tearing me apart for the last couple of hours.”

The words come tumbling from your mouth before you can stop and think them through. Why are you saying all of this!? Why does being around Shoto make you feel so comfortable and open to sharing? It’s so weird – and you’re absolutely sure he’s going to think you’re some kind of over sharing freak for telling him all of this.

Shoto looks at you thoughtfully for a long moment before speaking. “Something I have always admired about you is your ability to be straightforward about what you’re thinking and feeling. Most people aren’t like that, and I have a hard time navigating more subtle situations. Thank you for telling me exactly what you’re thinking – I value it so much.” He runs a hand through his slightly damp hair, moving the bangs out of his bright eyes.

“I’m sorry, Y/N. I didn’t mean to make you feel like I had abandoned you. I wanted to come to the library so badly. I want to kiss you so badly – it’s all I’ve been thinking about tonight.” His voice is so earnest that you believe him.

“Let me match your honesty with some of my own - my father is extremely strict. Ever since I was born, he’s pushed me to be better. To be stronger. He wants me to surpass him. He wants me to take All Might’s place as the number one hero.”

You gasp at this. Of course you knew that Todoroki was ambitious, but this…

“I don’t have any intentions of becoming harsh and cruel like my father. I’m not even sure if I want to go for the top spot on the hero charts.” He admits, almost bitterly. “That’s the path that my father has laid out for me. He’s obsessed with my training. With my ‘potential.’ But he doesn’t seem to give a fuck about how I feel. Excuse my language.” Shoto looks so sad, so despairing. He hugs the plush close, his chin tucked into his chest as he continues.

“I just want to help people and make them smile – just like All Might. But my old man just doesn’t seem to get that. Today, when he noticed how distracted I was… he didn’t ask if something was wrong. He just pushed me even harder.” Shoto avoids your gaze. “I think he purposefully pushed me to train into the night to keep me from meeting up with you. In his eyes…you’re a huge distraction for his prized creation.”

Suddenly you notice how exhausted Shoto looks – there are pale bags beneath his eyes. You scan his body and see light bruises beginning to form on the exposed skin of his arms. You wonder - just what kind of training has Endeavor been subjecting him to?

You had never guessed that behind Shoto’s calm and collected exterior, there is just a normal teenage boy trying desperately to please his father, while simultaneously trying to defy him. The whole relationship seems complicated and messy and you’re sure what Shoto is telling you is only the tip of a chaotic Todoroki family dynamic iceberg.

“Oh, Shoto.” You say softly. You scoot forward and wrap your arms around him. He freezes, unsure of what to do but nevertheless comforted by the sudden closeness. You reach behind him and card your fingers through his hair. You see goose bumps emerge across his skin, and realize that he likely hasn’t been touched this way before.

“Is it okay to touch you like this?” You whisper.

He breathes out a shaky “yes” as he moves to toss the Squirtle plush to the floor. Once his arms are free, he works to wrap them around you. He rests one strong hand on your back and slings the other around your delicate waist. He draws you close to him and holds you tightly as you continue to run your fingers softly through his two-toned hair.

He’s silent as he buries his head into your shoulder. There’s an emotion that’s radiating off of his body that you can’t quite place – sadness? Frustration? Maybe even relief? After a few moments of running your fingers through his hair and gently up and down his back, he finally starts to relax. The tense muscles in his shoulders loosen, and he seems to come back to himself.

“I’m sorry Y/N.” He whispers, muffled as he turns his face into the crook of your neck. “I’m not great at expressing my emotions. I can try to put it into words…I’m feeling so weighed down right now.”

“Because of your father’s expectations?” You prompt, running a light fingertip down his spine. He shivers a bit in response, but not in an unpleasant way.

“Sometimes I wonder if he sees me as a real person, as a son. Or am I just his big project?” Shoto wonders aloud, his voice a bit strained. You feel his eyelashes flutter against the sensitive skin beneath your jawline.

“Shoto...that sounds like a lot to carry. You’re just a high school student – your father shouldn’t be putting that kind of pressure on you. It’s not normal.” You tuck a lock of red hair behind his porcelain ear. “This situation sounds so complicated. It’s no wonder you feel so conflicted. I’m here any time you need a friendly ear to listen as you work through it.” You continue to caress him softly over his clothes. He begins to lean into your touch hungrily. “But right now – at this moment – you’re safe. In this room, in my arms, you don’t need to hold other people’s expectations of you in your heart. When you’re with me, I want you to feel that you can just be Shoto.”

You still your fingers as you let your words sink in. Shoto is radiating a deep sort of sadness that you wish you could smooth away with your fingertips.

“Thank you.” He says, his voice breaking a tiny bit as he processes your words. After a few beats Shoto exhales deeply, his breath ruffles your hair. “I’m not used to talking about these things. Actually, I’m not really used to talking much at all. Or being touched.” You can feel the blush on his delicate cheeks warm the skin of your neck.

“I can tell.” You say before you can stop yourself. To your surprise, he chuckles.

“I don’t know why it’s so easy to do these things with you – talking, touching…kissing.” He lifts his head off of your shoulder to look you square in the face. “There’s something about you…”

Suddenly, the room feels as if it’s charged with Denki’s electrification quirk as his bright mismatched eyes meet your own.

“I think I’d like to continue exploring this with you.” He says matter-of-factly, moving his legs to intertwine with yours.

“W-what does that mean?” Your breath catches in your throat as he dips forward to kiss down your neck.

“It means…I want to keep doing this. Kissing. Talking. I suppose I want to keep getting to know you like this? Intimately.” He places a soft kiss in the hollow behind your earlobe. “Would you like that as well?”

“Yes.” You breathe, with zero hesitation. He smiles into your neck before running the edges of his teeth lightly across your smooth skin. You let out a soft moan in response.

“Good. Then we’ll figure this out together.” He moves to kiss your cheek soundly before releasing you from his embrace. “But right now it’s well past midnight, and we both need our sleep if we’re going to continue to be top of our class alongside YaMomo and Ida. If we both let our grades slip, it might tip people off.” He moves to get off the bed.

“Hey – wait!” You grab his arm and pull him back under the covers. “I have no problem with you staying here for the night.”

“But wouldn’t that be inappropriate?” Shoto’s face reddens, but he lets himself be drawn back into your gentle embrace.

“Would it be anymore inappropriate than you making out with my tits?” Shoto’s face burns an even brighter red at this question, but he also looks quite pleased with himself (you assume he’s recalling the way he kissed down your breasts earlier that day as he smirks). “Sharing a bed should be perfectly responsible as long as we keep all of our clothes on. You said you want to explore? Well get over here and let’s figure out if you make a good big spoon.”

This earns one of those rare full smiles from Shoto – he practically glows. “Alright.”

He pulls himself close to you. You reach above your head and switch off the string lights that wind their way around your room, and the tiny dorm fills with darkness.

You turn to face the wall and scoot your body back until you feel Shoto’s solid warmth. He reaches around to pull you close until bodies are touching, flush together. You tuck yourself into Shoto’s warm, muscular body and sigh with contentment.

“So do I make a good big spoon?” He questions, tentatively nuzzling his face into your hair and inhaling deeply. “Mmm, your hair smells like lavender.”

“We’ll need plenty of practice to truly ascertain the full range of your spooning abilities.” You say in a faux-academic voice, causing him to snort out a laugh. “But so far you’re doing great.”

You interlock your legs and pull his strong arms around you. You wiggle a bit as you try to find the comfiest spot in the mattress. You unintentionally grind a bit against Shoto and jolt when you feel something hard pressed against the curve of your ass.

“Sorry.” He mutters softly, embarrassed.

“Maybe I’ll take care of that for you tomorrow.” You yawn as you close your eyes and settle in for a good night’s rest. You grin into the darkness as you feel Shoto’s dick get even harder as he mulls over your response, wondering at what you could possibly mean by “take care of that.”

You didn’t realize you were so tired. You’re dimly aware of Shoto’s breathing growing slow as he drifts off into a comfortable sleep. You smile softly to yourself as you slide further into his embrace. This poor, touch-starved boy has been through so many terrible things and your heart aches for him.

Even in sleep he’s tense, his jawline stiff and his muscles almost locked around you. But he’s warm and soft and smells like jasmine and mint tea. You hope that for the next few hours you can provide him with a safe harbor to rest and escape his troubles. You let your eyes flutter close and breathe in deeply, dreaming of Shoto’s sweet face as you fall gently into sleep’s embrace.

-------------------------------

Part 3

🔥 Link to My Master List 🔥

[st-eve-barnes]

Hush (modern Aemond x fem Reader)

Summary: Aemond has been crushing on you since forever but is too shy to tell you. One night while watching a movie with your friends and cuddling underneath a blanket he shows you just how much he desires you. Based on this little prompt "What if I pull your panties aside, and finger you in a public place…?"

Word count: +3700

Warning: 18+ for explicit content and language, fingering, teasing, dirty talk, hand job (sort of), mild choking,

***

All my fics are also on AO3

***

Aemond’s mind was everywhere except focussed on the movie playing on the big tv in front of him. Lord of the Rings the Two Towers just finished a few minutes ago and the intro for Return of the King now filled the screen. Aemond adored these movies, they always managed to get him out of his own head and distract him from whatever was happening in real life.

But tonight, even Frodo and Sam didn’t succeed in changing his low mood.

If it were up to him he’d be in his room right now, wallowing and hiding away from the world.

But his friends had insisted he’d hang with them for their weekly movie marathon. Part of him was grateful they looked out for him and cared enough, but another part of him just wanted to be left alone.

You’d been gone for over 5 hours now and he hadn’t thought of anything else since, how beautiful you looked with your hair down and that short, sexy black dress you only wore on date nights. Not that he would know anything about that. You had dated half his friend group but never him.

Of course not him, why would you?

He grabbed another handful of popcorn and tried to focus on the beginning of the movie but it was no use. He knew he’d go to sleep with you still on his mind, like he had so many night before in the past 3 years since he’d known you.

It was completely pathetic, but what was he to do? You were his best friend. He was the first one you ran to after every single one of those dates, sometimes to talk about how amazing the guy was and how you hoped he might be the one, but more often than not it was to cry on Aemond’s shoulder after another asshole broke your heart. 

The jealousy was enough to drive him insane sometimes, but still he was only too happy to lend you his shoulder and his arms whenever you needed them.

You always seemed so comfortable around him and in return Aemond could let his guard down with you, which was rare for him. Your friendship was the most important thing in his life, he’d rather die than lose you, and he'd rather have you as a friend than not have you at all. So he kept his feelings locked away deep down and played the part of supportive best friend while you went on one date after the other with a bunch of guys who never stuck around for very long. 

But he always would. Until maybe one day you would see…

He knew that was a dream he should stop indulging in but he just could’t help it, he was too far gone for you and tonight was a low point. He craved you so bad just the thought of you in that black dress had him growing hard in his sweatpants.

***

You opened the door of the apartment as quietly as you could, not wanting to draw any attention to yourself. You knew they were all watching the movie and maybe if you were careful enough you could just slip past everyone and get to your room without having to explain…

“Y/N!”

Shit.

Helaena’s voice made everyone look up at you. Your friends were all spread out across the living room, on the couches and on the floor, covered in blankets and surrounded by cozy lights and candles. The whole setting was very inviting yet you wanted no part in it right now, you just wanted to get to your room before you would burst out in tears.

But when Helaena got up and put her arms around you that plan failed.

“Oh, honey, no…what’s wrong?” she looked at you with concern on her face.

“Bad date,” you sobbed,”Don’t wanna talk about it.”

“Okay,” she caressed your hair,”Do you wanna watch the movie with us? We just started Return of the king.”

You shook your head,”I just want to crawl into my bed and disappear.”

But Helaena didn’t let go of you and shook her head,”No, I can’t allow that.”

“Can’t allow that?” you couldn’t help but smile through your tears.

“Come join us, you can cry over that asshole later, the people who care about you are right here.”

You sighed.

“Please?” she added with her sweetest smile, pulling you over the edge easily. You knew she was right, you deserved to end the night surrounded by friends instead of alone in your bed crying over some guy who wasn’t even worth it.

“Fine,” you caved,”just give me a few minutes.”

“Take your time, grab some popcorn and a drink from the kitchen and come find a spot.”

You did as she suggested, making a quick stop in the bathroom first to wash off your make up and exchange your dress for some comfortable shorts and a t-shirt. Then you got some snacks from the kitchen table and a soda from the fridge before making your way back to the living room. 

Much to your dismay everyone was sitting in pairs, even Helaena who seemed very cozy next to Jace. You instantly wanted to turn on your heel and go hide in your room anyway. But then you saw him, the only one who was sitting by himself. 

Aemond.

He was already looking at you when your eyes met his and he gave you a little smile, mouthing,”You okay?”

You shook your head.

“Come here,” he beckoned and he lifted up his blanket, an invite to join him and you didn’t hesitate.

You placed your drink and snacks on the table and crawled into the empty space next to him, Aemond was quick to cover you with the blanket.

“Hey,” he spoke softly, his hand on your lower back to pull you to him and place a quick kiss on your cheek.

“Hey, Aem,” you smiled weakly.

“That bad, hmm?” he asked.

You laughed bitterly, feeling the tears well up again,”Yeah, that bad.”

“Want me to go beat him up? Run him over with my car? Set fire to his place? Just name it. I can make it look like an accident.”

Your laugh was sincere and his lips curled up into a smile of his own while his hand squeezed at your hip.

Despite your best efforts a tear ran down your cheek anyway.

“Hey, baby, don’t,” he whispered while his hand gently cupped your cheek, brushing your tears away,”Don’t cry, sweet girl.”

You leaned into him, resting your head on his chest and Aemond wrapped his arm around you, gently caressing your hair while he held you.

“You liked this one, didn’t you?” he asked with a sigh.

“No, he was a total jerk.”

Aemond’s other hand gently cupped your cheek, his eye meeting yours,”Then why the tears?”

“I’m just…so tired of meeting these assholes. He flirted with the waitress the entire time, right in front of me, even gave her his number, like I wasn’t even there and…it just made me feel so…unlovable.”

Aemond’s jaw tensed up and you could see anger boiling in his one good eye.

His thumb traced your jaw,“Give me his name and I will make him regret it.”

He sounded so intense and serious you weren’t sure if he was still joking or not and it made a shiver run up your spine.

“When you talk like that I almost think you mean it,” you pointed out.

“Almost?” he gave you a teasing little smirk and you shook your head, leaning into his touch and Aemond didn’t hesitate to wrap both arms around you and pull you into him. You melted into his arms and let the rest of your tears fall freely, knowing Aemond would hold you through every last one of them.

You felt like the luckiest girl alive having him as your best friend.

He tightened his hug, soothing you with sweet, comforting words while his hand softly stroked your hair.“It’s okay…I got you, sweetheart..it’s okay, he doesn’t deserve you…please don’t cry…It’s alright, baby, I’m here.”

This wasn’t new, you crying your heart out in Aemond’s arms, it happened way too often, but something felt different tonight. The pet names, the way his touches lingered and how hungry he looked at you in between made your stomach flutter. And you didn't want it to stop.

Your tears were soon forgotten and the horrible date faded into nothing but a distant memory as you relaxed under Aemond’s attention.

You were stroking up and down his back when you accidentally slipped your hand underneath his shirt, a small whimper left his lips at your unexpected touch. It encouraged you to do it again, letting your nails drag across his back, this time he let out a small moan and his hand tightened in your hair.

“Aem,” you buried your face into the crook of his neck, breathing him in and making him shiver. He was biting his lip to keep from moaning again as you continued to touch him. When you placed a soft, innocent kiss in his neck he lost that fight.

You couldn’t help but smile seeing the effect you had on him and you kissed him again, this time letting your tongue trace lightly over his skin until he shivered again. You pulled back.

“Don’t stop,” he whispered, grabbing the back of your neck to hold you close to him,”Please…please baby, don’t stop.”

His one hand moved down your back to cup your ass and pull your one leg over his, your knee bumping up against his growing erection.

There was no way you were going to stop now.

You kissed his neck again and Aemond pulled the blanket up a little higher, making sure no one else could see what you two were doing but everyone seemed too distracted watching the movie anyway.

Your hands moved underneath his shirt to touch his chest and stomach, his skin was warm, hard and soft at the same time and you could feel him shiver again, his hungry eyes begging you not to stop.

Aemond was losing his mind, your hands all over him were driving him crazy and when you started kissing his neck again he was suddenly rock hard in his sweatpants. He needed to take control back fast, he grabbed your wrists to hold you back.

“Turn around,” he begged in a husky voice, still breathing faster than usual.

He manoeuvred you into a different position so you were lying with your back up against his chest. You instantly missed the feeling of his skin under your hands but it was forgotten about quickly when Aemond gently moved your hair to one side, exposing your neck to him and then placing soft, hot kisses on your shoulder.

Now it was your turn to try and stay quiet and you were losing the fight just as quickly as he had, letting out a soft whimper when he started kissing and sucking your neck.

“Aem,” you breathed.

His mouth was right next to your ear,”You want me to stop?”

There was a teasing, smug tone to his voice, he knew damn well you didn’t want him to stop.

His hand moved up your hip, over your stomach to cup your breast through your shirt, thumb circling your nipple while he continued placing wet kisses all over your neck.

Your eyes closed in pure bliss. “Please,” you begged,”Touch me…under my shirt…please.”

You could feel his lips quirk up in a smile and he gave you what you asked for, pushing up your t-shirt and caressing your tits again, pinching your nipple in between his fingers while his teeth grazed your ear.”I’ve wanted to put my hands on you for so long…touch you just like this…fuck, you have no idea what you do to me…how hard you make me.”

To accentuate his words he carefully lifted his hips to push back against your ass, letting you feel his aching cock.

You squirmed in his arms.

“Shhh,” he purred,”You need to keep quiet or I have to stop, okay? Can’t let anyone see what we’re doing.”

You bit your lip and quickly nodded your head. Your hand was on his leg and you were squeezing hard while you pressed your own legs together trying to relieve some pressure.

To say you had never lusted after Aemond would be a lie. You had always found him gorgeous and intense in a very sexy way, but he was your best friend, somehow you had never allowed your mind to really go there. Until tonight, and now that you had opened that door there was no end to how much you desired him.

“Feel,” he breathed into your ear while he took your hand and placed it on his cock,”Feel how hard you make me.”

You rubbed him through his pants, making him growl into your ear. Before you could do it again he pushed your hand away and kissed your neck again.

“You’re squirming so much, little one, what is it?” he teased, an amused tone to his voice,”Is there something you need, sweetheart?”

“Yes,” you breathed and you turned your head just enough to make brief eye contact with him,”I need you to touch me, Aem.”

You didn’t need to give him anymore details, he knew exactly what you meant.

“Can you be quiet for me?” Aemond checked, his tone serious.

“Hmm,” you confirmed.

He placed a soft kiss on your jaw while his hand moved down to your hip and then your inner thigh.”Spread your legs for me,” he whispered in your ear while placing your leg over his, spreading you open for him. You moved with him so easily and eagerly he cursed himself for not having done this sooner.

He caressed your hair and then placed his hand in the back of your neck, massaging softly and pulling your shirt down so he could kiss more of your shoulders and your back.

“Aem,” your voice was shaking,”Please…please.”

You had never begged so much in your life and every single one of your pleas was music to Aemond’s ears.

“Shhh, I got you,” he whispered, carefully untying your shorts and then slipping his hand underneath, teasing you by dragging his fingers over your panties,”Fuck, these are soaked right through. You are so wet, sweetheart.”

You couldn’t help but whimper at his words and Aemond grabbed your chin with his thumb, making you look back into his eye,”You really need it, don't you, sweetheart? Is that why you’re dripping all over my hand, hmm? You want it that bad?” 

You nodded and bit your lip,”I want you that bad.”

His cock stirred at your words and the feel of your hot, wet pussy under his hand was becoming too much. Fuck it, he should just drag you to his bedroom right now and fuck you into his mattress, give into what he'd been craving for so long now. But he also wanted to save that part for later, when all your friends had gone home and he could have you all to himself, take his time to really worship you the way he always dreamed of.

This right here, teasing you and feeling your body burn up under his touch, was turning him on beyond reason and it would have to be enough for now.

His breath was hot and heavy in your ear,”You want me to touch you?”

“Yes,” you breathed.

He gently pulled your hair back, placing his lips on your ear as he whispered,”You want me to push your panties to the side and finger you right here, with all of our friends in the room? Would you like that, my sweet dirty girl?”

All you managed was a quiet moan in the back of your throat but it was enough confirmation for Aemond to continue.

“God, you’re such a bad girl,” he purred, licking the spot right below your ear,”You’ll be quiet for me, yeah? Otherwise I can’t continue, okay, baby?”

“I’ll be quiet,” you nodded,”I promise.”

You were lying, you couldn’t promise him a damn thing and you were pretty sure he knew that but both of you were too far gone to stop now. He could suggest fucking you right here with all of your friends as witnesses and you would probably still say yes, that’s how badly you needed him.

Aemond carefully pulled down your shorts and then pushed your panties aside. His long delicate fingers teasing your clit, circling it slowly and spreading your wetness all over your folds.

You bit your lip to keep your moans quiet.

“Good girl,” Aemond praised,”Good fucking girl…lean back against me.”

Your head fell back onto his shoulder and Aemond caressed your hair, nuzzling your neck and your cheek, his other hand still rubbing perfect circles over your most sensitive spot. He continued until he noticed you started breathing harder and faster, your nails digging into his thigh, your orgasm within reach.

His finger moved to tease your entrance and you were no longer able to hold back the quiet little moans escaping your lips. You wanted to beg and scream but you also didn’t want to make a single sound and be so good for him. Aemond didn’t stop, pushing his long delicate finger into your fluttering walls and the both of you gasped for air for a moment.

“Fuck,” he breathed,”Oh god, you’re so tight…so warm….and so fucking wet for me…fuck, baby, I can’t wait for you to take my cock.”

You moaned at his words and he was quick to cover your mouth with his free hand.

“Shhh shhh,” he insisted but he didn’t pull back, instead he added another finger and then just held them there without moving,”You can’t do that, sweetheart, they’ll hear us. Be a good girl for me, okay?”

You nodded quickly, desperate for him to move his fingers again.

“Here, bite my thumb,” he suggested, letting his finger brush over your lips. You were quick to take him into your mouth, sucking slowly and dragging your tongue all over it. Aemond instantly regretted his choice because now he was the one losing control again. The feel of your hot, wet mouth on him went straight to his cock and the thought of that mouth swallowing him whole was enough to almost set him off.

“Slow down,” he begged,”Please, baby, slow down…fuck, you’re gonna make me cum in my pants like some horny teenager if you keep doing that.”

You looked up at him with feigned innocence while you sucked harder, keeping your eyes on him.

“Stop!” he pulled his thumb from your mouth and you couldn’t help but smirk this time.

“Aemond, you have to be quiet,” you teased.

Aemond’s hand moved to your neck, not choking you but holding you still while he started fucking you with his fingers, taking back control.

“Fuck,” you breathed.

“Maybe I should just keep teasing you, hmm?” he grunted in your ear,”Bad girls don’t get to cum and that…was very bad of you.”

He kept fucking you with his two fingers, curling them just right but as soon as he hit the sweet spot he pulled back.

“No, no please, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, Aem.”

He added pressure around your throat and started kissing your shoulder again, soft sweet kisses turned rough and he sucked your skin until it bruised, all while adding a third finger and fucking you faster. You were falling fast, biting down on your own hand now to stop from making too much noise.

“That’s my good girl,” he growled in your ear, while his thumb found your clit again,”I knew you could do it, sweetheart."

You were so close, your pussy clenching around him over and over, your climax was right there, all you needed was that last little…

“Cum for me, my sweet girl,” he whispered softly, teeth grazing your ear,”Come on..god, fuck you’re squeezing me so tight…shit….cum for me, baby, please. Please.”

He choked on his last word and you came hard, but not before moving your hand to his cock, rubbing him through his sweatpants until Aemond buried his face into your neck, muffling his own moan and spilling into his pants.

“Fuck, oh god you fucking little brat…fuck,” he breathed hard, wrapping both arms around you to hold you close to him. You stayed like that for a while until you turned around to be able to hug him back. Your eyes finally meeting his fully and the soft smile he greeted you with warmed your heart.

Aemond gently cupped your cheek.”Hey,” he whispered, suddenly shy again while biting down on his lip.

“Hey, you,” you smiled.

“Come here,” he leaned in to kiss your lips, slow and deep and so soft it was making your head spin again. You kissed him back with the same fire, melting into his embrace.

All those bad dates and horrible guys and you could have been doing this all along. Regret filled your senses and Aemond noticed the sudden serious expression in your eyes.

“Hey, you okay, sweetheart?” he asked softly, concerned,"Was it too much? Did you not like all the teasing?"

"No, no god that was perfect," you reassured him,"I just…wish we’d done this sooner.”

His lisp curled up into the biggest smile, warming your heart,”Me too, but we’ll make up for lost time, I promise, my sweet girl.”

He leaned in to place another soft, lingering kiss on your lips.

It was Aegon’s loud and obnoxious voice that pulled you both out of your haze:”Are you guys about done so we can get back to watching the movie now? Jesus fucking Christ, the bedrooms are right there, you couldn’t have done that in there or waited until the movie was over? Fucking horny bastards.”

“Oh god,” you buried your face against Aemond’s chest in embarrassment and he hugged you close, shielding you from the others and giving his brother the finger but also unable to keep the happy grin off his face.

Then he did what Aegon suggested, grabbing your hand and pulling you with him towards his bedroom, under loud cheers from most of your friends.

Aemond turned around one last time to wink at Aegon,”Better turn up that volume cause we're not going to be quiet this time.”

He closed the door behind him just in time to dodge the pillow Aegon threw at him.

[nebulaeternal]

✦.──Unspoken Cravings── .✦

―୨୧⋆ ˚GENRE/WARNING: porn w/little plot, exhibitionism, spanking, choking, overstim (if you squint), breeding f!xm, dirty talking, name-calling

―୨୧⋆ ˚SUMMARY: A casual friendly dinner with Sylus transforms into an encounter where your true feeling are exposed. He discovers the secret fantasies you've been hiding and takes control in ways you've only imagined, making them a reality.

―୨୧⋆ ˚WORD COUNT: 2.4K

―୨୧⋆ ˚A/N: Hello! I know I said I would have this done like two nights ago but I got caught up in things. Got the idea for this from @comatosebunny09, specifically from this post. I had fun with the concept I won't lie, thank you bunny <3 I hope you enjoy reading, let me know what you all think!

―୨୧⋆ ˚LINKS: AO3 Version, Twitter(Come interact with me!)

You had found yourself in the N109 Zone once more. It was becoming routine at this point with how often you visited the place. Of course, you only had one matter of business to attend to each time you visited, and that was to see Sylus. While you and Sylus have become more acquainted, you couldn’t help the growing attraction towards him, one you have been shoving down, hoping one day it’ll dissipate. However, the way he looked in his suit tonight was dwindling the hope of that ever happening.

Adorned in an elegant black dress, you sat across the table from the snowy-haired man. Eyes peering past the menu in hand, you snuck a glance at him, watching his eyes scan through the options, Sylus, not at all oblivious to your eyes on him, “Is my face more interesting than the menu?” his sultry voice, sounding out into the empty.

The place was cleared out, not a single soul in sight, virtually a ghost town, leaving the two of you alone in the giant, upscale, restaurant. “No, just curious about what you’d be getting this time.” You said casually. He smirked, leaning back in his seat. “Was my choice going to influence yours, sweetie?” he teased. You swallow dryly feeling your brain start to go fuzzy.

Looking back down at your menu, you gave him a short “No-” the man before you chuckled, quite amused with your answer. You, on the other hand, could be less concerned about how he perceived you, as you started to get lost in your thoughts. Quite the poker face you had on, staring at nothing in particular as a raunchy scenario unfolded in your head.

You couldn’t deny your attraction to Sylus, you’d wish you could tame it, but your desire for him only grew the more you saw him. His suit framed his broad shoulders, his piercing red eyes dusted with the fringe of his snow-white hair. And his large figure, his hands—you wanted them roaming your body, gripping your hips as he bent you over the table, hiking your dress up and claiming you in the middle of that restaurant—

Sylus furrowed his brows slightly, watching as your gaze only got more and more distant, despite your eyes still roaming the menu. He had already called out your name a couple of times, but you were too lost in your fantasy to hear his voice. Your lack of response piqued his interest.

While this wasn’t something Sylus typically chooses to do to you. He had only ever used his power on you twice, back when you first met him. Now that you were acquainted, well—he had no reason to use it—until now that is.

Sylus stared at you, focusing on finding out your current deepest desire. He peered into your mind, quite startled to find that he had you bent over the table, dress hunched up as he held a hand around your neck, driving his length into you with a forceful rigor while you were splayed out on the table, eyes rolling back, spit dribbling out your mouth.

Unbeknownst to you, he watched the scene unfold in your head, while you continued to casually browse through the menu. Acting like it was the most normal thing in the world.

He lept out of your mind, looking back to see your face, still unchanged. The waiter had stopped by the table. “Are you ready to order?” you raised your gaze to the waiter, leaving Sylus flabbergasted. You could hear the waiter but not him? “Yeah I’ll-”

“Leave us be, I’ll call you when we’re ready.” Your eyes shot to Sylus as you heard the waiter’s padded footsteps get further away from the table. “What!-Sylus why-”

“Too busy mind fucking me to hear me call your name?” Your eyes shot wide, cheeks flushing red and palms growing clammy. You wanted to open your mouth to speak but no words came out. You stared at him unsure of what to say.

Sylus’s signature smirk was plastered on his face, as he watched you grow more flustered by the second.

“Sweetie,” his words hung in the air, you were scared of what he would say next. He would for sure think you’re weird now, wanting him to fuck you in the middle of this restaurant, there’s no way he didn’t—“Getting lost again?” He purred, snapping you out of your thoughts. Slowly rising out of his seat, he walked around the table to stand behind your chair.

With one final step, his tall figure was now looming behind you as you held your hands clenched in your lap, shoulders tensed and high while you waited anxiously for his next move.

“Sylus, I can explain.” You tried to come up with any excuse possible, but it was exactly what it looked like. By no means, was that an accident.

“Little kitten’s gotten bold now hm?” His hands slip onto your shoulders, causing you to tense more. He brought his mouth down to your ear, fingers starting to move in slow circles as he spoke. “Relax, I won’t bite…much.”

You gulped hard, did you hear him right? Before another thought could run through your mind, you felt his fingers on your chin, turning your head till you and him were face to face. You could smell his cologne clear as day. Sandalwood and whisky invade your senses, the smell shooting straight down to your core.

‘Oh fuck’ you thought, clenching your legs. You weren’t sure what was coming next, but you could hope it was one of two things, he kisses you, or lets you take your walk of shame, anything to dissipate the tension that lingered in the air, as his carmine eyes pierced through your defenses.

His hand glides from holding your chin to wrapping delicately around your neck. He loved seeing the way your eyes widened a fraction of a bit before you settled into his grip, eyelids suddenly feeling heavy once he gave your neck a slight squeeze.

“There she is~” he purred watching you grow more dazed, off of something as simple as his hand around your neck, and yet, it was far from over. He smirked smugly, seeing how easy it was to make you crumble, he didn’t have to figure out much, not after he glanced into your mind and saw exactly what you wanted.

“What a dirty girl, you are.” You felt your face flushed, embarrassed by how easily you were unraveling. His lips found yours in a fiery kiss, the grip he had on your neck, unrelenting as his body pressed against yours, caging you in.

Your mind was spinning, the tension between the two of you was almost unbearable as his hands roamed your body, pulling you against him till you were both nearly draped over the table. The kiss was intense, full of passion, igniting something deep within you two. Sylus wanted to claim you with such a feral desire that it nearly made his composure slip, it took everything in him to restrain himself, at least long enough to savor you.

He groaned into the kiss, feeling your ass grind against his growing bulge. His lips trailed along your body, while you threw your head back moaning out his name “Sylus~” he smirked against your skin.

“Such a naughty fucking kitten,” He growled, hiking up your dress as he cupped your ass, kneading the flesh roughly while he laid sloppy kisses all over you.

“A thong?” He teased, snapping the thin band against your skin, loving the yelp that escaped your lips “Didn’t peg you for this kinda girl.” his fingers danced along your hips, delighted in entertaining the idea of giving you exactly what you craved.

Your eyes flickered to his, biting back the words you so desperately wanted to tell him. You couldn’t bring yourself to, far too embarrassed from the previous encounter, you didn’t wanna give in so easily, but everything looked so inviting, the scent oozing from his body, his lips, the sound of his voice dripping with lust, everything about him screamed at you to tell him. 

“Do I need to take a look up here again? Or are you gonna tell me what you want?” He asks, gently tapping your forehead with his finger, to which your face flushed hot. You avoided his gaze only to be drawn back to his handsome face when he spoke once more, his question still waiting to be answered. “Well?”

“....yes.” a small squeak managed to leave your lips, audible enough to understand, but that wasn’t enough for Sylus. He leaned in, teasing as he slid the straps of your dress down slowly. “Now I know you can do better than that, kitten.” You looked at the way his lips moved while he spoke in such a sultry manner.

”I’ll tell you. Don’t-Don’t look in my mind again..just claim me-please..?” Your pleas were like a prayer that he would soon answer. Sylus wasted no time bending you over the table, scattering the plates as you let him manhandle you.

Your eyes closed, throwing your head back onto his chest, enjoying the sensation of his warm hands on your skin. The cool air hit your exposed skin as your dress bunched and sat on the small of your back. His hand came down roughly onto your ass, sending shockwaves through you that caused your eyes to fly open as a cry left your lips.

“Sylus!” He chuckled, quite amused with your reactions. “This is what you wanted wasn’t it?” He asked, knowing very well that the answer to that was “Such a dirty slut.” You felt yourself clench around nothing, desperate for more of his touch. 

His words, the sting on your ass, the dirty name that left his lips, he knew exactly what he was doing to you. “You want me that bad huh? Clenching around nothing?”

‘He knows everything-‘ you panicked internally. At this point, Sylus could read you like a book and it was only getting more obvious with each passing second. His hands gripped your hips firmly, grinding his hardness into you. “Sy~” you moan, feeling your mind start to get fuzzy again.

“Do you really want this?” His voice was soft, eyes peering into yours. His hands stilled, waiting for your response. He would never push you—not unless you told him what you needed. You nodded eagerly but he couldn’t accept that. Sylus gripped your chin, making you look him in the eyes. “Use your words, love. I need to hear you say it. Do you want this?”

“Yes,” you said breathlessly, your voice just above a whisper. “I want this—want you, please.” A smirk tugged the corner of his lips at your words. The clinking of his belt buckle create a symphony with your ragged breaths as you wait in anticipation. You felt him slide the flimsy material to the side, prodding at you with the tip of his cock.

Your breath hitched, feeling the heat and slick radiating as he teased you, dipping the bulbous head in and out of your folds “Sylus, pleasee~” You whined out, pushing your hips back in a silent plea. He chuckled at your response, satisfied with your desperation and he entered your slick walls in one swift motion, the two of you moaning loudly. Your body trembles as he begins to move.

Sylus’s grip on your waist tightened as his other hand found its way back to your throat, his fingers wrapping around deliciously. The pressure on your neck, coupled with the punishing pace of his hips had you dizzy, arms trembling against the tabletop. 

The sound of skin slapping against skin filled the room, accompanied by your whines and broken whimpers of his name. Sylus’ grip never faltered, his hand keeping you steady as he drilled into you, the snapping of his hips sending shockwaves through your body. 

“So…good.. don’t stop-” You whimpered out, breathlessly. His grunt in response told you he had no intention of stopping. Releasing your neck, your body fell forward slightly, upper body slumped against the table.

You felt his large hand come down on your ass once more, the sharp slap followed by a satisfied grunt from him. “You’re so good for me,”  he growled feeling himself nearing his release with how hard you gripped him.

“Kitten, I’m not sure I can last much longer-” Before he could let himself go, he reached his arm over your hips, creeping along your skin till he found your clit. The combination of his touch and merciless pounding sent you closer to the edge. 

“Close!-“You cried out, gripping the satin tablecloth beneath your palms. Feeling the force of his thrusts shoving you further into the table, further into your climax. “Please!” You weren’t sure if you were begging for him to slow down, or keep going. Practically screaming, you fought your climax, but Sylus would not stand for it.

“Don’t. Fight. It.” He accentuated each word with a thrust, pushing you over the edge as stars burst behind your eyelids, a sheen spray spilling from within you as you coated his length in your juices. The sounds were lewd and made your ears burn hot as you heard the squelching coming from your cunt while he mercilessly beat on your clit, his pace still unrelenting as continued to thrust into you.

Sylus was not far behind. The way you tightened, the sound of your moans, how you had squirted all over his cock, leaving a slippery haven for him to indulge in, driving him closer to the edge. The sound was ripped from his throat when he slammed into you one final time, grip unbelievably strong as he spilled into you, painting your insides white.

His body was hunched over yours, twitching while the rest of his cum spilled into you. You both stayed there a moment, spent and fucked out. The air was full of your ragged breaths as you both tried to regain your composure.

Sylus finally released the grip on your hips, sliding out of you with a grunt. He watched as his cum threatened to spill from your lips and smirked. He helped you pull up your thong, certain it would do little to prevent the mess from leaking down your thighs.

His large hands smoothed out your dress. “You ok, kitten?” his voice a soft and low timbre. You nodded, still unable to speak much, not sure if it was because you were breathless or spent. “Good, cause this isn’t over just yet,” you look over your shoulder, turning to look at him, “I’m far from finished with you.”

banner creds: @cafekitsune and @rookthornesartistry

[satxnsupreme666]

Tainted love: Dark!Wanda Maximoff x fem!reader/Agatha Harkness/Agnes x fem!reader

Masterlist

Pairing: Alright so this starts as a Dark!Wanda Maximoff x reader and then it turns to be Agatha Harkness x reader (I really like the idea of Agatha helping and saving reader)

Based on the cover songsTainted love by Holy Wars and Hannah Peel´s cover of the same song

Summary: You´re living an unhappy marriage with Wanda and your neighbor Agnes decides to help you to get away from the person who makes you suffer.

Warnings: Toxic relationship, angst, Wanda maintains you captive inside Westview, mentions of kidnapping, Wanda manipulates and alters reader´s memory, gaslighting, mentions of blood.

Word count: 12k+

Author´s note: This was one of the first stories I wrote three years ago, I had posted them on Tumblr on my old account, but due to my mental health, I had to take a break from Tumblr and the toxicity and hate that had suddenly increased, I deleted all of my stories and my old account, now I have decided to upload them again here on Tumblr and also on Ao3.

I hope you like it!

If you enjoy, could you comment, like or reblog? it would help a lot really ♥️

Taglist: @midnight-lestrange  @eliscannotdance

 Sometimes I feel I’ve got to

“Printsessa you don´t have to worry about anything! You´re fine here with me, what´s outside doesn´t matter to us, there´s nothing important outside!” You remembered Wanda hissing at you all of those words, but you didn´t understand why it felt like a dream, as if it wasn´t real, you were sure she had yelled at you the day before today but then, why it felt as if you had dreamt about it, the memory was a little blurry but you could remember her frustrated face, was it real? If it was, why were you discussing about? You couldn’t tell.

You couldn’t remember what had happened yesterday, had you gone out for some groceries? Had you gone to Dottie´s place? Why you couldn’t remember?

You sat up in your bed, and more questions came to your mind, at what time had you gone to sleep yesterday? Why you couldn’t remember simple things like that? You started to feel frustrated and tried to focus on your mind, what were all of these images of Wanda and you discussing?

“Why do you want to go outside so bad? Here you have everything you need, I´m giving you everything you want, I don´t understand why you want to leave, it doesn’t make sense to me!” Was this a memory? Have you dreamt about it? Wanda would never yell at you right? She wouldn’t never yell at you; she had told you that many times, you repeated yourself in your mind.

“Printsessa? Are you alright?” You heard Wanda asking beside you, you felt her hand passing around your waist

“I don´t know” You said while closing your eyes.

“Are you having nightmares again, my love?” You frowned

“Nightmares?” You asked with a confused look on your face

“Yes, don´t you remember? You´ve been having nightmares for the past days, you always wake up in the middle of the night, and I have to calm you, did you have nightmares again?” Wanda was really concerned, so they were just nightmares? That had to be.

But why were you doubting? You believed her right? She couldn’t be lying, could she?

“I don’t remember having them, but-“ Wanda suddenly moved herself to get closer to you and her sudden action made you feel scared, unconsciously you moved to the side and you blinked, why had you done that? You weren’t scared of her, then why did you do it?

You could see the hurt in her eyes, and you couldn’t help but feel bad, you had wanted to touch her hand to say something, but you felt there was something wrong, you couldn’t shake the feeling off.

“I can make them go away if you want lyubimaya moya” You saw the worried look on your wife´s face, there was something missing in the way she spoke, her soft tone was still there but you couldn’t tell what was missing, it felt different, and you felt frustrated, why couldn’t you remember anything from the other days? You only had some glimpses of some things, but you weren’t even sure if they were memories, dreams or nightmares.

“No!” You hastily said, you were surprised with your own behavior, why were you suddenly feeling so afraid of her magic?

“Can I hold you?” Looking at her face the only thing you saw was sadness, but why? You felt the need to let her hold you and rest your head on her chest but there was this part of you, a voice in the back of your head that told you to stay away, but you didn’t get why, she was your wife, you didn’t have to be afraid of your own wife.

Deciding to ignore that unnerving feeling in your heart, you slowly nodded and Wanda started to come closer to you, this time she did it slower, her hands up in the air as if she was letting you know she wouldn’t do anything to you, oddly her action made you feel a lot more comfortable about what she was doing, she passed her hand around your waist, her grip was soft but firm at the same time, you started to relax in her arms and slowly you pressed your head onto her chest, for a moment you felt calmed again, you felt the love she promised you, the heat of her body against yours made you remember of how a home felt.

“I´m really sorry printsessa, I just want us to be happy, but you don´t let me help you, I will make these nightmares go away, nothing will ever make you feel this way, I just want you to be happy” Before you could separate yourself from her, her grip around you became stronger, it wasn’t soft anymore, you could feel her hand on your waist, holding you tightly against her but in a harsh way, you wanted her to stop holding you so harsh but she was stronger, before you could do something else she put her fingers on your temple, you couldn’t do anything else, closing your eyes you felt unconscious in her arms.

Wanda held your unconscious body against her, she hated doing this to you, but the real memories were messing with the fake ones she had put in your mind, she couldn’t lose you, no one more time, she was not going to let that happen, you had been gone for so long and now that she had you back, she was not planning on letting you go, after all you were alright with her, nothing could hurt you anymore.

“I´m doing this to you because I love you y/n, you´re safe here with me, just with me, I would never hurt you” Wanda whispered into your ear, her eyes closed, her grip on you started to become softer and with her free hand softly caressed your face, Wanda hoped you would understand why she was doing this, it was all for you.

Get away from the pain

 You woke up to an empty bed, where was Wanda? Frowning you stood up from your bed, you couldn’t help but feel as if you had already woken up hours ago, was it in the morning or in the middle of the night? Or maybe you just hadn’t slept well, and that was why you felt so sore.

Maybe taking a shower would help to ease the pain in your head, your headache was growing and you just wanted to lay back in bed again, but you felt as if you had already slept for many hours, you really didn’t want to go back to bed.

Physically you felt exhausted, the constant headaches were awful and the tiredness you felt almost all the time was unbearable, you wanted to go out to do something else, but at the same time you didn’t feel like going out.

This made you feel conflicted you just wanted the pain to stop, but you didn’t know how.

You were supposed to be happy; you were sharing your life with Wanda, you were her wife she had given you everything you had asked for, a family, you were living peacefully with her, but then why you felt so miserable? It made no sense at all, you felt so alone in this big house, there were so many rooms and you felt like every single thing hid something inside them.

A piece of paper on your nightstand distracted you from your thoughts, you knew it had been Wanda the one who left the small paper, taking it into your hands you saw Wanda´s handwriting, she had gone out again, this time she told you it was something about her job? Last time it had been something about a committee, it was alright, you started to relax a little but, why? You missed her terribly but at the same time there was this part of you that made you want to get away from her, she had never yelled at you or hit you, but whenever she was close to you, the way her hand gripped you a little too harsh, the way she told you everything would be alright, made you feel a little uncomfortable, there was a memory of her in your mind, a memory of a loving Wanda who used to hold you against her chest, singing Sokovian lullabies into your ear when you were afraid, her touch used to be soft, now her touch was severe.

A bunch of new thoughts started to come to your mind, Wanda said they were nightmares, but were they really nightmares? You tried to focus on these thoughts, how her behavior had changed, all the little things that she now did, you remembered she had always been a jealous person, but her new possessiveness scared you.

If she saw you talking to someone, she would get so jealous, so jealous that you even feared her reaction.

What she used to do was what made you stop talking to everyone who was just being nice to you, you didn’t understand her harsh tone against the others, but what made you feel more confused was that the others didn’t mind Wanda talking to them the way she did, like that time when Dottie had asked you how your days had been going at the supermarket, you were sure Wanda was on the other side of the store, she had told you she would go check for some fruit and you wandered around, you bumped into Dottie near the cereals isle, Dottie only asked you a simple question and before you could even answer, Wanda appeared out of nowhere, telling Dottie to go bother someone else, that she was not in the mood to deal with her, your wife didn’t even give Dottie time to explain herself, you couldn’t even hear a word Dottie said, because your angry wife took your wrist with such an angry and harsh grip, guiding you to the entrance, you didn’t even buy anything!  

Wanda dragged you to your house, all the way to your home she didn’t say anything to you, you felt so scared to even talk to her, Wanda didn’t notice she was hurting you, you tried taking her hand off you but that only made her angrier.

You blinked several times, here there were those memories again, at this point you were pretty sure they were memories, but when had they happened? You just wanted to know what was going on, Wanda told you that she loved you, but why it didn’t feel like that anymore?

Trying to ignore all of these thoughts you decided to go for a walk, now that Wanda wasn’t at your home, you had the chance to go out without her constant surveillance, maybe you could even talk to someone other than just your wife, it didn’t matter who, you just needed someone else to talk about anything, at this point you didn’t even care what it could be, you even wished you could find Dottie to just hear her talking about her meetings.

After changing your clothes, you went downstairs, looking around everything you felt there was something so strange about this house, and you couldn’t even put your finger on what it was, you felt awful, frustrated, you couldn’t even remember many things, and this only made you feel worse.

Going outside your house you notice how everything was so nice, the day was really pretty, the sun wasn’t too bright and the wind was refreshening, it was good to be outside, you didn’t even remember when was the last time you had been outside alone, it felt like it had been days since you were on your own here outside.

Walking through the streets you noticed there wasn’t anyone outside, what was going on? Why nobody was in the streets? Not even Dottie was in her garden, there weren’t children playing in the street, how was that even possible? You tried to think If the other times when Wanda and you had gone for a walk, there were people a lot of people for what you could recall, you even went to some houses to try to see if there were people in there, but you couldn’t see anything, and fear took over you, your lips started to tremble, everything was quiet and you found the silence unsettling, there was definitely something odd happening, after some more minutes of wandering alone through the solitary street and with your pounding heart you decided to walk back to your house.

“Y/n sweetheart?” A voice distracted you from your thoughts, you turned yourself around too look at the person who had called you.

 “Agnes!?“ You exclaimed with a happy tone, you were happy to see someone else, and Agnes was a gentle person to you, so you felt really happy to see her

"Thanks you’re here, it seems like you’re the only person around here” You said, with your voice trembling a little.

Agnes noticed your agitated state and felt concerned about you, you were really upset and she could see it, the way you were constantly rubbing your hands against your clothes, the way you were looking your surroundings as if you were afraid of something appearing, she was sure it was because Wanda wasn’t near this place, she was sure Wanda had gone to the limits that was why no one here was moving, but she didn’t want to scare you or upset you more.

“Oh darling it may be because it’s Sunday and everyone must be watching that show that airs on Sundays” She tried to reassure you with a smile on her face, her answer seemed to calm you a little bit because you stopped biting your lip as well as you stopped turning your head to look at your surroundings, your shoulders also seemed to relax a little more, and that made her feel a little calm, she didn’t like seeing you in such a distressed state.

You thought a little about her answer and it made sense to you, you remember that show that Wanda liked to watch on Sundays, but another thought came to your head, if it was Sunday then why Wanda had told you she had left for something related to work?

“Isn’t Wanda with you?” Agnes noticed how you shook your head a little at the mention on her name

“She’s not home, she left for-” You thought a little about whether was right to tell her or not, Agnes wasn’t a bad person, you couldn’t remember interacting a lot of her, but at the same time you felt you had already talk to her many times, she made you feel calm, her presence was recomforting and there was this feeling that made you trust in her.

“She left for something related to work” You saw how Agnes frowned at that.

It didn’t make sense to her, Wanda didn’t even work? She was going to ask you more things but the way you looked, she felt bad, you looked too tired and the sadness and you had in your eyes, she couldn’t see you like this, it was clear you were suffering.

“Would you like to come home with me? You can help me with a new recipe I’ve been wanting to try for some time doll” She softly asked you and you liked the idea, you really wanted to do something else so you nodded, you saw the way she smiled and you smiled too, she waited for you to start to walk and the two of you walked side by side, arriving at her house she opened the door for you and a quick memory of Wanda opening a door for you in a complete different place came to your mind, you blinked a little, what had been that?

“Are you alright sweetheart?” Agnes noticed how your expression changed for a confused one.

“I’m alright” you told her in a rush and she let you in, you slowly entered and you felt different, it was a different feeling to be inside her house.

Agatha knew you weren’t alright, she knew what Wanda was doing, she knew everyone else was under Wanda´s mind control, but why would she do it to the person the red-head was supposed to love? Her first plan had been to take Wanda’s powers, but now her plans had changed, she wanted to take your suffering away, she had tried to wake you up many other times, using her powers and it didn’t work, Wanda’s powers were really strong, the only thing that could wake you up was that you went outside Westview, but she knew Wanda wouldn’t let you do that, so she had to think of something else. She needed to do it quickly you were really suffering and she was sure Wanda’s magic had started to mess with your head, you didn’t know what was real and what wasn’t. For now, she could only try to make you feel a little better. She had to try to make you feel a little happy in all this messed up situation.

“Alright doll, so wanna start with the fun?” She asked you with her cheerful tone.

“Sure, yes, I love cookies, I want to help you bake them, where do we start?” You asked her trying to ignore the intrusive thoughts that came to your mind.

“First you will need an apron, you don’t want to get yourself stained with eggs and chocolate powder, right darling?” You nodded and she showed you a really pretty apron, she handed it to you and when you were about to tie it, she took the laces that were in your back.

“Let me do it for you darling” You felt shy at her action, you knew she used to be like that all the time, so you let her tied them for you, it was a nice gesture.

“Alright darling there you go” Agnes winked at you and you shyly smiled.

“Then let’s start, shall we doll?” You nodded and she grabbed different bowls, spoons and containers and placed them on the kitchen Island.

You came closer to her and she asked you to start pouring the eggs on the bowl but when you were about to do it, she stopped you.

“Wait darling, aren´t you going to take your pretty ring off your hand?” She inquired eying the ringer in your finger.

You blinked your eyes and slowly turned your look to your fingers, you didn´t think about it and a question came to your head, when did Wanda and you got married? Why couldn’t you remember it? You frowned a little thinking about that, why couldn´t you remember that? It was supposed to be an important moment of your life and you couldn’t recall that day.

“Are you alright doll?” You heard Agnes asking behind you.

“Yes, yes I´m alright” You said slowly to her, and took off the ring of your finger

“Do you want me to put that in a safe place so you don’t lose it?” You gave the ring to her and she took it in her hand, you saw that she put it in a small box in one of the shelves.

“Alright doll, now you can keep doing what you were going to do” Agnes said walking back to the kitchen island with her typical smile on her face.

You smiled and started to mix the ingredients in the bowl, you were really grateful to do something new, you couldn’t even remember when had been the last time you had done something else than just staying at home with Wanda and sometimes going out with her for some groceries or a short walk, Wanda was always with you now that you thought about it, but it was more like if you were under her surveillance, you shook your head, you were really enjoying your time with Agnes so you tried to push aside these thoughts.

Agnes was a really sweet person, she was attentive all the time you were there with her, if you had a question on how much of something you had to add she would explain you carefully, step by step, her perfume was really sweet you liked the vanilla smell that came from her.

“Honey you have some, let me help you” First she gestured to your face and when you try to clean whatever it was in your face Agnes laughed because you had just spread more the flour in your face, so she came closer to you, and with a napkin on her left hand she softly removed the flour off your face, her touch was so delicate, you wanted to stay like that a little bit more, but you quickly thought about Wanda, so you quickly separated yourself from Agnes and kept cleaning the kitchen island.

Agatha pouted a little, she would have liked to keep caressing your face, but she wouldn’t do it if you were uncomfortable about it.

You had a lot of fun with her and you enjoyed your time with Agnes, she was hilarious, you felt happy here with her, she made you feel good and you liked the feeling.

The older woman put the cookies in the oven and when she closed it, she went back to help you put everything you had used in the correct place.

“Can I put some music?” You asked shyly

“Of course, darling” She answered you and you happily went to turn the stereo on, the music started and it was your favorite song playing, so felt happier, at home you didn´t listen music at all, or did you? You couldn’t even tell, not again the thoughts.

“Hey doll would you like to do something else while the cookies are ready?” She asked you because she saw the distressed expression on your face, she just wanted you to be busy with something else.

“Yes” You blurted out, you didn’t need to think twice.

“We can play a boardgame, would you like that angel?” You nodded and felt your heart melt at the endearment, it felt so different, the way Wanda used to call you scared you, and you didn’t even know why.

You saw that Agnes went upstairs and minutes later she came back with a boardgame, you helped her placed everything on the living room´s table and when finally everything was placed and you had your tokens you started to play, it was awesome, Agnes had always a funny remark to say, you couldn’t stop laughing at her comments, you really enjoyed playing the game with Agnes, you were at peace, you felt inner peace, you didn’t feel like you needed to stay away from her like the way you felt with Wanda, you felt genuinely happy here with Agnes and you loved the feeling.

You played with her many rounds until you heard the alarm Agnes had set thirty minutes ago and you and her stood up from your sits to go for the cookies.

She took the cookies out of the oven and she placed them on the kitchen counter to make them cool a little, they looked really great and they smelled delicious.

“These look awesome Agnes” You said to her while pointing at the cookies with the pretty different shapes.

“That´s because you helped me, that´s why they look so good sweetheart” You couldn’t help but feel a little shy, you smiled at her biting your lip a little, you waited some minutes until she told you could start to eat them now that they weren’t too hot.

You were excited and you took one in your hand you were about to start eating the cookie you were grabbing in your hand but you heard a harsh knock on Agnes´ door.

You and Agnes frowned, who could it be? You saw how Agnes burrowed her eyebrows and she gestured you with her hand to wait for her, you understood and she went to answer the door

When she opened the door, you heard an angry Wanda and at the sound of her furious tone you instantly tensed in your seat.

“Where´s y/n?” You heard Wanda asking in an angry tone, fear took over you, you knew she wasn’t happy she was mad, really mad, maybe it hadn’t been a good idea to come into Agnes´ house, you started to regret your decision.

“Calm down darling, she´s here with me, we baked some cookies” You were too scared to even turn around when you heard quickly steps getting closer to you.

“What are you doing here?” You heard Wanda´s voice really close to you and you tensed more.

“I just, I helped Agnes to bake cookies” You said in a fearful tone, why were you so afraid of her?

“But you could have baked them all by yourself at home, you could have waited for me to arrive home and we could have baked them, you didn’t need to come here” You didn’t know what do or what to say, you just stared at the table in front of you.

“Oh darling, why are you so angry, I´m pretty sure she just wanted to get some fresh air, we haven’t seen her outside in days” Agnes said I a light tone, but when you heard she had said days, you lifted your head to look at your wife and you saw how her eyes went wide.

“Where´s your ring?” She asked you in a harsh tone changing the topic.

“I took it off so it didn’t get stained” You quickly said to her, you didn’t know where the courage had come out.

“Where is it?” She asked you again.

“It´s here darling I put it in a small box so she didn’t lose it” You saw how Agnes went for the small box and she took the ring out of it, she was giving it to you but Wanda quickly took it from her hand, she took it And you saw how Agnes burrowed her brows.

Wanda stretched her hand out to you with the ring on her hand and you got confused.

“Put it back” Wanda demanded, Agatha felt her blood boiling, how could she treated you like that? You deserved more, but she had to wait, she couldn’t risk it, she had to think carefully what to do next so Wanda didn’t hurt you, or mess with your mind again.

You were doubting, she was your wife yes, but she didn’t have to talk to you like that, you slowly took the ring from her hand and put it back on your finger.

“Let´s go” She said and started to walk towards the door, you turned your head to look at Agnes, and she saw the fear and doubt in your eyes.

“It´s alright doll, you have to go, don´t be afraid” She told you and that made you feel better, you nodded and she gave you a quick squeeze to your hand.

  The love we share

 Wanda and you arrived to your house and after you entered you flinched when Wanda slammed the door.

“Why did you go outside?” Wanda demanded to know; you didn’t want to turn yourself around to see her angry face.

“Why did you go outside?” You heard asking again.

“I just wanted to! I can´t stand being here all the time” You blurted out

“But we go outside! You can go outside when I´m here with you!” She answered back

“Bu why can’t I go outside alone?” You started to raise your voice a little, you didn’t understand why she was acting like this

“Just look at what you did today, you went to Agnes´ house and you even took your ring off!” She was being irrational.

“I didn’t do anything! I just talk to you, you don´t let me talk to anyone else anymore”

“How do you remember that?” Wanda quickly inquired.

“What? What do you mean? What are you implying?” You started to question and you saw how Wanda´s expression changed, that scared you a lot.

“I´m sorry printsessa, I didn’t want to scare you, I just, I´m worried about you” Wanda started to walk slowly and her sudden change of behavior made you fear her.

“Can I give you a hug?” You didn’t want to, you knew she was thinking something, you really didn´t want to let her hug you, there was something off, you just knew, unconsciously you stepped back

“Please my love I just want to hug you, like I always do” She started to walk faster towards you and you just felt the need to run.

You started to run towards your room but she used her magic to stop you from going upstairs.

“I´m really sorry my love, I can´t let you go, you´re mine, I´m only doing this to you because I love you”

“Wanda, please you don´t have to, this is not love, you don´t-“

“That´s not true! I love you; I DO love you, never said the contrary!” Wanda yelled at you making you close your eyes, you were trembling, at this point you were sure she had been the one messing and changing your thoughts.

“Please, Wanda you´re hurting me!” You squinted, it hurt, it hurt physically and mentally, you couldn’t keep with this.

“I´m sorry, I´m really sorry my love, I have to, If I don´t do it, you´ll get away from me, and I can´t let that happen, not again” She had tears in her eyes and you didn’t know why, you were the one who was in pain

“I swear to you, I won´t go away from you, I swear it, just please don´t do this again” You were pleading but she didn’t listen, Wanda came closer to you and she pressed her fingers against your temple, and once again Wanda caught your unconscious body against her.

“I´m really sorry for this printsessa, but I don´t want to lose you again” She whispered into your ear.

And I’ve lost my light

That night you dreamt of a different place from this one, you saw many people you couldn’t recognize, a tall blonde man who smiled at you kindly, a red-head woman hugging you and telling you that everything was going to be okay, a man with a serious expression and a metal arm saying comforting words to you, you couldn’t tell who they were but all of them seemed concerned they were worried, but why?

After that you started to had nightmares, there was a war, a big man, many people fighting against some type of creatures, and then you saw Wanda her eyes glowing red she was using her power to lift something big, but also you saw her crying over someone, that was really blurry, she was holding someone on the ground and then you didn’t see anything more.

 When you woke up again, you were surprised you remembered everything that had happened the day before, how could it be? This time you remember what Wanda had done to you, how she had used magic on you, it had been real, everything she had done was real, now you were aware, Wanda had been using her powers to erase some events and things that had happened.

You were relieved that Wanda wasn’t in the bed with you, there was another piece of paper on the nightstand and you quickly took it.

-I’m going out for work printsessa, I hope you slept well, I have a surprise for you, we can go outside if you want when I arrive home, love you-

Her small letter made you feel angry, how could she do this?

What caught your attention was the ring on your finger, she hadn’t taken the ring off your hand, but what surprised you was that the little diamond wasn’t white anymore, now it was completely purple, you thought about whether it was a good idea taking it off or not, but in the end you did it and left it on the nightstand.

You started to be more scared, now that you were sure Wanda was manipulating your thoughts so that you didn’t remember what she had done to you, you started to doubt more about her, what else had she changed in your mind? What was this place? Why where you here? What had she done to you? You couldn’t even remember more about your life. You needed to calm down a little, if you think about it, Wanda wouldn’t be back until noon, you didn’t know where she really went and you really didn’t care, you just needed to get out of this place, you couldn’t take it anymore, you used to love Wanda you were sure about it, even if you couldn’t remember you were sure you used to had something beautiful, what you and her used to have was like a dream, but now it had turned into a nightmare for you.

You really wanted to take a bath, but you didn’t even feel safe in your own house, there was no one else who could help you, everyone here seemed to live just to please Wanda, no one dare to contradict her, as if everybody was scared of her.

You went downstairs, you had the same clothes of yesterday, you weren’t even sure if it had been yesterday or not, did you even have a phone? You didn’t know, you were sure if you had one Wanda wouldn’t even let you use it.

The only important thing you needed to do was to get out of this house as possible as you could, running to the front door you took the doorknob to open the door.

“Damn it” You cursed under your breath, why was the door locked? Where were the keys? You started to look for them, but they weren’t anywhere, you didn’t find them on the bookshelf, they weren’t on the table, they weren’t on the kitchen on counter, not even in your drawers of your room.

Wanda had locked you in your own house, how could she have done that? You couldn’t believe it, why would she do that? You were terrified, this wasn’t supposed to happen, maybe she had just locked the front door, so you went to the back door of your backyard to try to get out.

“Dam it, it´s closed too” You hit with your palm the door, this wasn’t fair, you needed to get out of here, Wanda knew you would try to go out so she did this, what else could you do?

The windows! You quickly went to look for the windows in the first floor but they were closed and even if you tried using all of your strength you couldn’t open them, this was wrong, this was all wrong.

Going upstairs to check on the windows you noticed they were locked as well as the ones in the first floor, when did Wanda had the time to lock them like this? How had she done this? What if she had used her magic to lock them? You were feeling desperate you really needed to get out of here, but how?

You´ll have to break a window, it was the only thing you could do at this point if you wanted to get out of this prison.

You took some of the decorative medium size rocks that were around a potted plant, you didn’t need to think twice your next moves, so you threw the rocks aggressively against the window and you cover your face when it crashed against the big window, pieces of glass went flying and when the crashing sound you turned yourself to look at the now broken window, you smiled at the sight now you could be free from this house, you didn’t want to hurt yourself so you took your jacket off and placed it on the edges of the window so that you wouldn’t cut yourself, after making sure that all the sharp edges were covered, a little insecure you pressed your hands on the edge of it, this was not the time to be scared, you needed to do this.

Taking a deep breath you pushed yourself to be able to jump over the window of the first floor, half of your body had already passed but you didn’t notice there were some sharp edges at the sides of the table until you felt an awful pain on your left hand and arm, you tried to get out faster but your foot got stuck a little and a piece of glass teared part of your jeans, it got to your skin and you hissed, the pain was awful but you needed to get out of this.

You fell onto the grass and grunted a little, you would have liked to just lay there a little bit more, you felt exhausted but you needed to keep going.

“y/n? Oh god, what happened to you darling?” You heard Agnes´ worried voice, lifting your head to look at her she saw your tired eyes and the state you were in, she felt really guilty, she should have done something to help you, Agnes stretched her hands to help you stand and you gladly accepted them, she carefully took your hands carefully not to hurt you more.

“What happened sweetheart?” Agnes saw the broken window and some pieces of glass were covered in some blood and her heart jumped.

“y/n doll are you hurt? Let me see” The woman in front of you softly took your face in her hands looking for wounds on your face, you could see how upset she was, the worry in her eyes and the troubled expression she had, her eyes were so pretty and you felt a warm feeling growing inside your chest.

Stop, you thought, this was not the time for that, not now.

“I´m alright Agnes, I´m not hurt, you need to help me, Wanda locked me inside the house and I had to break the window to get out” You blurted out and you saw how Agnes clenched her jaw in ager, you couldn’t take it anymore and started to cry, you were desperate, you just wanted Wanda to stop, why couldn’t she just let you go? You threw yourself into Agnes´ arms and she carefully hugged you back, your sobs were breaking her heart, it had taken some time to understand what was going on with you and Wanda, at first when she arrived at Westview because of Wanda´s magic and she saw you, she just thought you weren’t having a great day, but your confused stare at what was supposed to be your house raised her suspicions, then the way she saw how Wanda dragged you to different places with harsh grip on you or the way she talked to you when someone else got near to you to start a nice conversation, she knew what had happened to Wanda,  but she didn’t knew anything about you, she didn’t know why Wanda had brought you here but she felt awful for you, your constant tired and sad look on your eyes, the way you would always look down at the ground, not even daring to look at Wanda, what had she done to you? Why did you look so scared of her? Agatha started to suspect there was something more going on between you and her, because sometimes you didn’t even get out of your house for days, the first time that she remembered that happening was two weeks after she had arrived for the first time.

All of you were in one of Dottie´s meeting, during the meeting you had been sitting next to Wanda all the time, with her hand on your waist and you even looked as if you were afraid to move, from time to time she kissed your cheek and you just stayed there, tensed the entire time, she had wanted to do something to make you feel a little less tense, maybe talk to you or made you laugh but Wanda didn’t let you alone until she found the perfect opportunity, when the meeting was over everyone dispersed and went to talk with different people some women were chatting with the others and she saw how Wanda told you something in your ear and you just nodded looking at the ground, then Agatha saw how you walked to the deckchairs and you sat down in one of them she followed you to talk a little with you, when she got near you, she saw how you just were staring at the water not even moving at all, and she frowned, why were you always so quiet?

“Hi doll, are you bored?” She asked you sitting next to you in the other chair, she saw the way you jumped a little at the sudden voice of hers.

“Hi Agnes” You shyly smiled and gave her a quick glance to her, turning your head quickly to look at the water again.

“I´m just a little bored, I would like to go now, but Wanda keeps talking to Dottie” You admitted to her, in that moment she frowned why wouldn’t just leave then? Maybe you didn’t want to go alone, she thought

“What if I accompany you to your house?” She kindly asked you and she saw how your eyes lit up for a moment.

“That would be great, but I have to ask Wanda first” The blue-eyed woman saw the way you thought about it for a moment and she nodded, you were Wanda´s wife after all.

“I´m going to ask her, wait here” You kindly smiled at her and she nodded again at you, she saw how you stood up from the chair but what disconcerted her was the way you walked towards your wife, as if you were scared of getting too close to her, she saw the way you hesitate to touch her arm, when you finally did it, you never dare to look her in the eyes, you  just stared at the glass Wanda was holding, Agatha knew there was something wrong, why would you be afraid of your own wife? She saw the way your lips almost trembled to her while you spoke and when you stopped talking to her she saw Wanda smiled at you and how she hugged you, you didn’t return the hug you just stayed still, after separating from you Wanda said something to Dottie and your wife took your hand to start walking towards her, when Agatha saw your face again she could swear you were scared, Wanda and you walked until you were standing in front of her.

“Thank you so much for offering to take my wife home, but I will take her home, you shouldn’t have to worry, I was almost finished, but thank you for the offer, right y/n?”

Agatha saw the way you quickly nodded and you didn’t even dare to lift your head to look at her.

“It was good to be here, but we´re leaving” Wanda was smiling at her but she couldn’t shake the strange feeling about her.

After that day she didn’t saw you for four days in a row, she saw how Wanda came out of your house and entered again hours later, the fourth day Agatha hadn’t seen you she decided to ask Wanda what was going on, so when she was in her garden and she saw that Wanda had arrived to your house she quickly went to say hi to Wanda.

“Hey darlin! I hope you´re enjoying your day at all, isn’t y/n with you? I haven’t seen her in a while” Agatha asked with a smile on her face, her expression didn’t match with the real emotions she was feeling, Wanda turned herself slowly from her front door and walked towards her, her annoyed expression changed into a fake smile just in the nick of time.

“Oh hi Agnes, I´m enjoying my day yes, I was just going to pass a lovely evening with my wife, she´s been feeling a little under the weather, that´s why you haven’t seen her, she decided to stay at home, but don´t worry, she´s getting better, so you don´t have to worry about her”  And with that Wanda went back to her door and entered to your house.

The next day she saw you, at the center of the town, Agatha had the unsettling feeling that there was something else behind all of this,  you were smiling and letting Wanda hug you as if nothing had happened days ago, you were holding hands with her and this time, you seemed to be happier, but Agatha had the feeling that was not the real way you were feeling inside.

And now that she was seeing you here, holding your trembling body against her she knew she had to help you, she couldn’t keep seeing you suffering.

Agatha had to do something, it had been so wrong to wait to do something, now you were here physically hurt because Wanda had locked you in your own house, your body was shaking with fear, this time she wouldn’t let that Wanda messed with your head again, not again.

“You´re safe with me doll, it´s alright, I won´t let Wanda get near you again, she won´t ever hurt you again” She was holding you tightly against her and for the first time you felt safe, you just wanted all of this suffering to end.

She took your hands in her and looked at you straight in your eyes, your beautiful eyes were red from all the crying, she needed you to explain things to you first, but she needed to do it quickly before Wanda came looking for you again.

“You´ll be fine” You heard Agnes say to you and she took your hand in hers waiting for you to walk, she guided you to the back door of her house and you followed her, she was holding you hand with a soft grip on yours, it felt so different as the way Wanda grasped your hand.

 Once I ran to you

 Agnes guided you inside her house and once again you felt at peace, you didn’t feel tense or afraid here with Agnes, the older woman made you feel safe.

“Sweetheart first I need to clean these wounds, would you let me?” You nodded and she made you sit in her couch.

Agatha couldn’t stand seeing you this way, you looked so broken, she knew there was more behind this, she wanted to make you smile, the times you had shared with her, the times you didn’t remember because she was sure Wanda messed with your memories, she was happy that you had asked her for help, she was sure that the spell she had put in your ring the day before had helped you, that spell at least helped you a little so that Wanda didn’t altered your memories, she wanted to tell you everything, but first she needed to take care of your cuts.

“I´ll be back quickly, I need to get some alcohol and cotton gauzes” She caressed your face a little before going to her bathroom, for what she needed.

You started to relax a little in here, you didn’t feel any pressure, it was good to be here with her.

You her quick steps coming closer to you and the sound of her rushed steps didn’t scare you as how Wada´s had made you feel when she came to your side demanding to know what you were doing with Agnes.

“Angel, let me see the cuts, I´ll be as gentle as possible, I don´t want to hurt you more than you already are” You felt touched by her words, so you showed her your arm and your hand, those were the ones that hurt the most, she cleaned the cuts and applied alcohol on them, then she put the cotton gauze and she did the same with the cuts in your leg, you really liked her gentle touch against your skin, it felt so nice to know that she didn’t want to hurt you, when she finished she placed everything in the small table in the living room and looked at you.

You saw how she brought her hand to your face and she softly caressed your cheek, unconsciously you lent into her touch, it was so nice to feel how she treated you with such delicacy, you were not expecting when she suddenly knelt in front of you, her hand were resting carefully in your knees and she was looking at you with almost pleading eyes.

“Doll I need to tell you the truth, but I promise you that you don’t need to be afraid, I just want to help you get away from this, you deserve so much more and I can´t let Wanda keep doing this to you” You said yes with your head and she took a deep breath and closed her eyes before speaking again.

“My real name´s Agatha Harkness” You had thought she was joking but when you saw the serious look on her face you realized, she wasn’t lying.

“I´m a witch, at first I came here, because I felt Wanda´s magic and I had wanted her powers, but my plans changed, I´m not interested in her powers anymore, I just want to help you, I can´t stand seeing the way you´re suffering” She felt some tears threatening to fall at the corner of her eyes, when Agatha saw that you weren’t saying anything and that you just stared at her with a blank expression on your face she started to fear the worst, she didn’t want to scare you, she needed to tell you the truth.

“Doll, I´m sorry I didn’t tell you this before, but please you don´t need to be afraid of me, I don´t want to hurt you, I just want to help you, I put a spell on your ring yesterday so that Wanda´s magic didn’t affected you, I was sure she was going use her magic on you, and before she took you back to your home days ago I knew she would do it, so I planned on coming to see you but in these two days she didn’t leave your house, she was constantly there until now, I saw she had gone out and I decided to go see you but then I heard a loud crash and when I arrived at your house you were laying on the ground that´s when I-“ She didn’t finish her sentence because you had hugged her, you passed your arms around her shoulders and when she felt how close you had pulled yourself to her she passed her arms around your waist, you started to sob again and she quickly removed a little from you to take your face in her hands and with her fingers she wiped the tears away from your face.

“You really did that to the ring?” You asked between sobs but with a smile on your face, you were amazed, thanks to her you got the chance to go out of that house, she nodded and you hugged her again.

“Thank you so much, you don´t know how that helped me, thanks to you I can remember the day you and I made cookies, you don´t know how much I love that memory, I can´t remember a lot of things but I can remember this and it makes me so happy that you did that for me”

“You don´t need to thank me sweetheart I want to help you, I´m so sorry I didn’t do anything before to help you, I tried to wake you up before but Wanda´s magic is too strong, her magic is tied to her emotions and when she´s angry her magic becomes stronger, I don´t know how is that even possible, but I assure you Wanda won´t hurt you again” She took your hands in your and gave them a soft squeeze to them, you nodded and closed your eyes, Agatha pressed her forehead against yours and you felt happy, you felt really happy that you had someone who wanted to help you.

“We need to go sweetheart; we need to leave as fast as possible” You whispered a small “yes” and the two of you stood up.

“Wait I´ll give something to cover yourself sweetheart, it´s could outside” You felt a warm feeling growing inside your chest and when Agatha came back with one of her jackets, she helped you to put on the jacket.

“Thank you” You said shyly and she smiled, you were so beautiful, you deserved to smile and be happy.

“Let´s go darling” Agatha took your hand in hers and she guided you to the door, the blue-eyed woman held the door open for you and she let you go out first, you really loved this gesture of her.

“We need to hurry darling; I don´t know if she can feel you or not, I promise I won´t let her get near you again” Agatha said to you and she started to guide you towards the other side of the street.

“We will have to go towards the other direction” You nodded and the two of you walked down the street.

This tainted love you’ve given

 After what felt hours of walking you finally arrived to the limits of the town and you felt horrified when you saw the people who were frozen on the street.

“What´s all of this?” You asked Agatha while covering your mouth, you couldn’t believe what you were watching.

“I didn’t want to have this conversation with you, I don´t want you to feel scared, but now that you´re seeing all of this, it´s necessary that you know the truth” The two of you stopped walking and she turned herself to look at you.

“This place is an illusion, Wanda created all of this, she´s using her power to make all of these people do what she wants, they can´t help but do everything what Wanda says, these people are frozen because Wanda´s not here, It doesn’t affect me because her magic isn’t able to affect me” She said and you quickly hugged her, it was awful what Wanda was doing.

“I´m really sorry you had to see this sweetheart” Agatha pulled you closer to her body and she softly stroked your hair.

“We need to keep going darling, we´re almost outside” She was right you could almost feel the freedom.

Agatha grabbed your hand again and the two of you walked towards the entrance, when you were close enough you saw something weird in front of you and you turned your head to give Agatha a questioning look.

“This is the magical field that covers Westview, doll, I want you to know that once we cross this field, all the memories Wanda locked inside your mind, you will be able to remember all of these, I know you´re strong enough to handle them, but I will be with you all the time alright?” You were scared you were going to remember everything you couldn’t and that scared you a lot, but you knew Agatha wasn’t lying she made you feel protected and you trusted her.

“Alright, I´m ready” You said to her with confidence, you really wanted to go away from this place.

You felt her hand squeezing your and she nodded to you, you and her walked at the same time and while you started to cross the magical field, you felt some pressure over you, but when you touched the other side the uncomfortable weight on you disappeared, the next thing you knew, a bunch of memories of your real life came to your mind.

You saw your old life back in the Avengers compound, the way your family had vanished into thin air, how Natasha had died for the soul stone, the battle against Thanos, how Tony had died for all of you, you remembered every single thing Wanda had blocked from you.

You also remembered how Wanda had cheated on you with Vision, the way you had felt when you saw her kissing the synthezoid.

You remembered what had happened that day, everything was clear now, she had proposed to you years ago, she used to be a loving and caring girlfriend, but that had been years ago, she used to loved you and you used to love her, you had thought you would be sharing your life with her, years ago she told you how much one day she would love to live with you in a beautiful house of two floors in a really pretty neighborhood, she had sworn to you that she would make everything to protect you from everything and that she would make you happy, but that day when she broke every one of her promises you gave her the ring back, she had pleaded you not to leave her, she had begged you many times to make you stayed with her but you didn’t accept it, and then everything happened so quickly, you didn’t even got time to mourn on your feelings, earth was attacked and after that you had just lost all of your family.

“Are you alright doll?” You heard Agatha asking you, you blinked many times and you noticed tears streaming down your face, you felt Agatha pulling you closer to her and once again you let yourself express all of your pain by crying into her chest, Agatha soothed you and stroked your hair, now that you were finally outside she could see your thoughts and she felt the same pain you were feeling, you deserve to be happy and she was going to make sure of that.

  Tainted love

“Stay away from her” You jumped at Wanda´s voice, there was that accent, you knew there was something missing when she talked to you inside Westview, and now you realized it had been her accent.

“No, you stay away from her” Agatha placed herself in front of you

“Who do you think you are?” You could see Wanda´s eyes glowing red just as well as her hands, for a moment you feared the worst, but when you saw Agatha´s hands glowing purple, you sighed feeling relieved.

“You´re hurting her Wanda, can´t you see it?  this is not healthy" Agatha said to Wanda

“That’s not true! I’m doing this for us, I need her and she needs me! We are meant to be together” Wanda yelled and it made you feel angry, she was hurting you and you were exhausted, you couldn’t believe what she was saying.

“You need to stop Wanda!” You yelled back at her, you placed yourself next to Agatha and all of the anger started to come out of you.

“You hurt me! You made me feel awful, you were manipulating my memories, you used you Magic to make me believe a false life!” You were gesturing at her and you saw how her hands stopped glowing red.

“I love you!” She yelled and you bitterly laughed at that, you wiped some tears that had fallen down your face and you felt Agatha’s hand caressing softly your back, that made you feel better.

“That’s not true Wanda, you don’t love me, this is not love, love is not supposed to be painful, love is not supposed to make you feel exhausted, love is not supposed to scare you, you don’t love me and I don’t lo-”  You were cut off by the read-head

“That’s not true! You love me just as much as I love you! I did this all for us, I did all of this for you, this is our dream, the one we share-”

“You kidnapped me Wanda! You took me away from my home! You kidnapped me and brought me here! That’s not love!” You interrupted her

“That’s not true, that was not your home, this is our home, we can go back to it, we can live peacefully we can go back to our amazing life and forget that all if this ever happened” Wanda started to walk slowly towards you and before she could touch your arm you quickly stepped back.

“Don’t touch me!” You quickly said and Agatha placed herself in front of you.

“You heard her Wanda, you better back off” You saw Wanda’s expression changed into a really angry one

“I won’t repeat myself y/n you better come with me; I love you” You couldn’t understand why Wanda kept saying the same.

“No, I won’t go back to you, you just made me feel awful, you made me feel exhausted, you locked me in that house, YOU DON’T LOVE ME”

“We are married” she quickly said.

“That’s not true, you know that’s not true, we were going to get married years ago but you cheated on me”

You argued back and you saw the way Wanda flinched at the mention of what she had done.

“It was a mistake, I really love you, I don’t want to lose you again, please, you’re breaking my heart, I need you” Wanda knelt in front you she was holding her arms in the air towards you, she was sobbing in front of you, but this time she couldn’t manipulate you, not anymore,  Agatha looked at you and she smiled at you, her smile was comforting, she made you feel safe and now that you could finally remember every single moment you had interacted with her inside Westview, you realized that was how love was supposed to feel.

 Now I know I’ve got to

Run away, I’ve got to

Get away

 You came a little closer to Wanda and you knelt in front of her, Agatha was next to you making sure Wanda wouldn’t do anything to you.

“I’m sorry Wanda, but I won’t go back to you, you don’t love me and I don’t love you, you have to accept that, I can’t be with you, this is not love, what we used to have years ago is over, you have to let it go” You said looking into her green eyes, you didn’t recognize the old Wanda, the person in front of her was full of rage and hatred, you couldn’t blame her at all, she had lost everyone but, this was not fair to you, she was hurting you and you didn’t deserve it, you didn’t feel the same for her.

“Love is supposed to make you feel happy, as if you’re floating on air, love makes you feel safe and protected, love makes you keep going, it doesn’t stop you” Looking back at Agatha she smiled at you and you smiled back at her, she had risked herself to help you get out of it, and you knew that was how love was supposed to be, with Agatha you were sure you could have it, a real love.

“So, you fell in love with her?” Wanda’s voice was louder and you could hear her accent coming back, this time it was more present than ever, you could tell she was really mad, her hands forming into fists and her eyes glowing red in anger, she hastily stood up from the ground and Agatha pulled you closer to her.

“Answer me! Is she the reason you’re leaving me?” You saw Wanda’s jaw clenching and her left eye twitching a little

“She’s leaving you because you just inflict pain into her heart, Wanda you’ve been messing with her mind! She was feeling anxious she didn’t know what day it was, you held her captive inside a place she didn’t want to be, you just made her suffer, she doesn’t deserve this, you’re hurting her, why can’t you understand?”

Agatha was shocked at how Wanda couldn’t see what was the real problem.

“That’s not true, you’re the one who is manipulating her, you’re a liar, you’re not even who you said you were” Wanda kept talking and you felt desperate

“Stop, just stop, I don’t want to listen to you anymore” You said to Wanda while holding your hands in the air, you pressed your fingers against your temple, a headache started to form and it felt awful, you closed your eyes and  you put more pressure of your fingers into your temple.

Agatha came closer to you to softly touch your arm.

“Are you alright sweetheart?” You heard Agatha asking you.

“Don’t call her like that, you don’t have the right, she’s mine, and she will just be mine” Wanda had started to come closer to the two of you.

“Don’t come closer Wanda” you heard the blue-eyed woman warned Wanda.

“What? Do you think I’m afraid of you?” Wanda asked with a mocking tone

“Oh dear, I could easily destroy you with a flick of my hand” the dark-haired woman next to you scoffed, you could almost sense the smirk Agatha had on her face.

“Stop right there” Those were new voices; you lifted your head to see who were they and you saw many soldiers pointing their guns at the three of you.

“Not you again, not this time” The red-head started to move her hands in the air and she made all of the soldiers point to the sky, but the moment you felt you couldn’t move, you realized she was using her magic on you as well.

“Y/n!” You heard Agatha calling your name, purple magic enveloped you and you felt yourself being released, she used her magic to stop you from falling harshly against the ground.

“You need to stop trying to take her, she doesn’t want to be with you, y/n doesn’t need you!”

“That’s not true! She needs me just as much as I need her, I love her-

"STOP!” You snapped and didn’t realize the wave of magic coming from your body, your magic was f/c and when you opened your eyes again you saw Wanda covered in a new different magic, you saw your hands and your eyes widened when you realized it was you the one who this time stopped her from moving.

You gasped and this time you saw all the soldiers on the ground, they were covered with your magic too and you started to panic a little, but when you felt Agatha’s hand on your shoulders you started to relax a little.

“It’s alright sweetheart, I know you can do it, focus on what you’re feeling, don’t let the fear consume you”

Slowly you nodded and focused on what you wanted, you wanted the soldiers to go away, so you moved your hand and when you heard noised this time you opened your eyes to see all of them started to walk away from where they had coming.

“I’m so proud of you darling, you did it amazing, I will make sure they don’t come again” She caressed your cheek and you smiled at her, she stayed with you making sure no one else came to where you were.

“You think you she loves you y/n?” You heard Wanda’s laugh and turned your head to look at herk kneeling on the ground with her hands behind her back and all of your magic over her, she didn’t stop laughing for some minutes, you just couldn’t believe what was happening to Wanda.

“No one will ever love you the way I do” Wanda said back to you when she stopped laughing, you looked straight into her eyes and the only things you could see in them was madness, you felt bad for her for a minute, you knew what she had passed through but all the things she made you passed through as well, you even doubt your own sanity, you couldn’t forgive this, she had kidnapped you and she had messed with your mind, you didn’t even know how many time you were inside with her.

“You don’t love me Wanda, this is an obsession Wanda what happened-

"What happened was a mistake, let me make things right this time printsessa, I really love you, you’re the love of my life! I need you!” She begged you again, but you this time you weren’t going to fall for it, not anymore, you closed your eyes for a moment and took a deep breath before speaking again.

“You don’t really want any more from me, to make things right, Wanda, you can’t make things right, this is messed up, not only you hurt me, but you’re hurting thousands of people, let them be free, let me be free Wanda, please, I want to be free” Tears started to fall down your face

“You need someone to hold you tight printsessa and I’m the one who can do that, I can-

"You can’t Wanda, you broke what we had years ago! You broke me, and there’s no way you can fix this! If you want to make things right, you’ll let me go with Agatha, if you love me, you’ll release me”

“I can’t do that printsessa, you’re mine, you’re just mine I won’t let her or anyone else take you away from me” You saw how Wanda’s eye’s started to glow red and you moved your hands to stop her hands from moving behind her back, she wasn’t going to use her magic on you again, not anymore.

“I’m not yours, I’m not yours, the problem is Wanda that you think love is to pray, but I’m sorry, I don’t pray that way, you won’t get to me again, I don’t love you” You whispered to her loud enough to hear you, Agatha took your hand in hers and you used your magic to pull Wanda back inside Westview.

“I will find you y/n and I will make you mine again, you belong to me” You heard her yelling and Agatha pulled you closer to her.

“I will come for the both of you and I will make you pay for taking y/n away from me, you will pay and I will make sure of that” Wanda tried to break free from your magical ties but you didn’t let her.

“You can’t get away from me y/n I will always be with you and no matter what I will find you-”

Finally, you put Wanda inside the town and Agatha started to make movements with her hands, a purple mist covered the entirety of the town, the magical field Wanda had created was replaced by Agatha’s purple magic.

“This will only keep her inside for some weeks, maybe some months until she realizes how to get out from this, I trapped her inside Westview but this won’t last forever doll” You felt the older woman’s hands taking your face in her hands.

“I’m not afraid” You answered to her and you saw a proud smile on her face

“I know you’re not afraid, you’re so strong and brave, I will be with you, no matter what, I will be with you, I know you can protect yourself but I will protect you too, and when the time Wanda comes for us, I will be by your side, she won’t take you again doll, I promise”

You felt safe with her, she made you feel alright and you couldn’t help yourself, you took her face in your hands and slowly leant into her, Agatha passed her hands around your waist and she pulled your body close to hers, you felt her soft touch on you and that made your heart melt, this is how love is supposed to feel, you knew it, you presses your lips against hers, she captured your soft lips, it was a soft but needy kiss, she needed to feel you and you needed to know she was there for you, you needed to know this was real.

When the two of you broke the kiss, she pressed her forehead against yours her hands never leaving your sides.

“I know it will take a time for you to get used to this, but I promise I won’t hold you back, I want to make sure you’re alright, I want the best for you y/n” You trusted her, you knee she was saying the truth, and you were grateful with her, without her help you wouldn’t have been able to get out of your prison.

“I believe you Agatha, I want to be with you, I know you will help me to heal” You whispered to her and she smiled, she hugged you again, the feeling of your body against her made her feel alive and you felt the same, you weren’t free at all from Wanda, but you knew that Agatha would there for you to help you.

You felt something bothering in your pocket, there was something in it and when you pulled your hand inside it you felt shivers down your spine, pulling out the small piece of metal you saw it was the ring Wanda gave to you because of your “marriage” you were Wanda had been the one who placed it in your pocket with her magic, you eyed it for a minute before throwing it against the grass.

“We have to go doll” She was right, you had to go now.

Taking your hand into hers, Agatha guided you towards the forest, you didn’t know where you were going but you were sure that Agatha would make everything, she could to protect you.

The two of you walked through the forest, between the tall pines, the sound of some branches breaking because you stepped on them was some of the only sounds you could hear, the night was a little cold and from time to time you still feel a little afraid, but when you felt Agatha’s hand softly squeezing you hand to reassure she was there and she wasn’t going anywhere made you feel strong.

You knew Wanda would come for you, you were sure she would do everything she could to find you, but you were sure you wouldn’t be alone this time, you weren’t afraid of her, she didn’t have that power over you anymore.

When Wanda comes for you, you were sure you were going to be prepared, just as Wanda wouldn’t let her take you, you were going to fight Wanda, you’re not afraid of her.

Now I’m gonna pack my things and go

[blacklunardice]

Request from Ao3: Question: I saw you have x-men on here, what would Logan do as a Yandere? Would he be more romantic or like a dad (I could see both ways) just in the 1st movie alone without his memories he’s very protective Would it be any diffrent if he had the instincts of a wolf? And even with his memories he has quite the past… and the fact that he can’t die…. Would he force stricken to give her a healing factor gene too and the metal so she’s nearly as indestructible as him? … is it bad I’d love to see him use Stryker and them end him and his operations permanently (he could make it so Stryker is the bad guy in all of this and even get the one he likes (romantically or fatherly honestly would love both) to help kill Stryker he’d be like a hero to them, making it that much harder to leave him!

Warning(s): Mentions of murder (not towards Darling), Possessive Behavior/Thoughts, Aggressive Behavior

I can also see it both ways as well! It just really depends on his viewpoint on you. Either way, it doesn't change how protective he is regarding your life and safety.

There's this high need to be by your side, yet he keeps his distance. Given what he's been through and who he's lost, it's his instinct. Even so, he lingers around, making sure you're okay.

Gonna be real here, he acts more like an actual wolverine than a wolf. Wolves are pack animals and aren't that aggressive unless you mess with them. Wolverines, however, are highly aggressive, territorial, and solitary animals (who also take on animals much larger than them but can be aware if the fight is too much for them). Does fit with Logan, unfortunately for anyone who tries to get too close to you.

His jealousy and possessiveness are much higher in the romantic route. You're like his lifeline, his light in the darkness. With such a past like his, you are literally the best thing to ever happen to him. A breath of fresh air. However, he's so... guilt-ridden. There's this sense of self-deprecation and hatred he has within himself that prevents him from getting too close to you. He'd opt to watch from a distance, acting as a protector from afar. 'Cause like hell he's leaving you alone even with the painful thoughts of him not deserving you.

It doesn't matter if you are a mutant or not, Logan will still be overly protective. Both scenarios will have you in a vulnerable spot for danger. Being a mutant just means bouts of discrimination and the possibility of cruel people (like Stryker) taking advantage of you. He would kill that entire facility if they ever try touching you or using you against him (if you're human or mutant in this scenario).

I fully believe he wouldn't go through having the same procedure that Weapon X placed on him done to you. He doesn't want them touching you, period. He'd hate himself if you were ever hurt or put in danger like that. So no, he wouldn't try to do anything like that to you. Maybe another way to keep you with him will arise, even if it is extremely selfish of him to wish for it. 

[yallthemwitches]

United Front

Lily and James have the best intentions when showing up to Petunia's engagement party.

Written for Day 2 of Jily Week (hosted by @sunshinemarauder and @kay-elle-cee) , Prompt: Partners in Crime

AO3 link Here

“She’s going to be cruel.”

“Brilliant, I love women who are dastardly.”

“No, I mean she’s going to find the thing deep inside you that you hold most dear, taunt it to oblivion– then crush it.”

“Very poetic of you Evans.”

“James, I need you to be serious. I need us to be a united front.”

They walked down the main street of Cokeworth. On a normal day where she wasn’t dreading her near future, Lily would have relished the idea of taking James on a little tour of her town. The fall leaves were littering the walkways and little shops had placed out intricate decorations ushering in the fall weather. 

Lily stopped abruptly and James followed suit. Paces ahead of them was a heavily flowered awning with large pink and yellow bows plastered all over it. Cresting the door to the building was a large sign that read in flowing script:  Congratulations soon to be Mr. and Mrs. Dursley.

“Don’t weddings usually happen in a church for muggles?” James fingered one of the balloons, making it bop back and forth. 

“It’s not a wedding. It's the engagement party—now let me see you.”

Lily gave him the once over. His button down was undone just enough to see where his clavicle connected to his chest and his slacks were well fitted on his bum. 

“Damn—you’re too fit,” she breathed out. James beamed and gave her a soft kiss. 

“Thanks–”

“No, I mean really, you're too fit. She’s going to be so cross.” James’ brow crinkled. 

“Er, I’m not following.” Before Lily could explain, the door to the house burst open. Petunia was in a light yellow and peach party dress that looked like it was straight out of a 1950’s refrigerator ad. 

“What? You just going to hold court there all day?” Petunia clasped the door tightly with one hand. 

“Hello to you too Tuney.” Lily tried to remain composed. “Congratulations on your engagement! We brought you some flowers.”

Petunia took one look at the bouquet in Lily’s arms. “You really shouldn’t have.”

She took them and walked around the porch, setting them in the back corner where they were hardly visible. 

“There,” Petunia said with a nod. “Now they won’t clash with the decoration.”

James side-eyed Lily whose friendly facade was crumbling fast. The smile on her face quivered with rage.

“Who is this, why is he here?” Petunia didn’t even look James in the eye, rather giving him a once over before turning a hot shade of pink that clashed with her dress. 

“This is my boyfriend—you said I could bring him.”

“Where’s the other boy?” James head whipped over to Lily who looked just as confused as he felt. 

“What other boy?” Lily spat back, flustered. 

“You know the one who always looks sickly.”

“Oh, Remus? He’s not my boyfriend Tuney—you knew that. James is.”

James decided he had enough of being talked about without any interjection. 

“Nice to meet you…and congradu—”

Petunia gave him another once over, but this time with a more discerning eye. Her pale ears turned red. 

“I mean honestly, Lily. I can’t believe you would do this to me, you always need to be better—well come on.”

She turned her body to the side leaving an opening to enter the house. Lily grabbed hold of James’ arm and tugged him past and down a hall that was draped with various silk bows.

“Uhm—I know I’m not keen on the muggle ways of conversation but—what was that?”

Lily trudged forward still holding his forearm tightly in her hand. 

“She thinks you're fit. I told you she’d be angry—don’t worry about it.”

They reached the sitting room where a backdoor was open and a cacophony of people wafted into the house. Lily stopped walking and turned to James. She put both hands on either side of him and he instinctively lowered his forehead to rest upon hers. 

“We’re a team. A united front. We will survive this.” Lily chanted to herself with her eyes closed. 

James gave her a little squeeze and pulled her into his chest. 

“Don’t worry. We’ll have some drinks, talk about muggle stuff that I’ll pretend to understand, and then I can take you back to school, get you out of this gorgeous dress, and then we can shag all the stress of the evening away.”

Lily snorted and James made a soft smile. “You’re a git.”

“Love you too.” He gave her a kiss on the nose and they locked hands to enter the back garden. 

Outside a large table had been adorned with enough frill to supply the entirety of England. A table of drinks had been set up and Vernon stood with a few men Lily didn’t know drinking beers around it. On the other corner of the garden, a bunch of women stood tightly in a circle only to break apart to eye another party guest with disdain. 

“So—a drink?” James offered. Regardless of being the most out of place in the whole event, James carried himself as though the party was meant for him. It was a trait that in other moments might have annoyed her, but she was thankful to have some relief from the suffocating feeling of anxiety. 

James pulled Lily over to the drink table and Vernon turned with heavy effort to intercept them. 

“Lily–” Vernon didn’t smile. His eyes were wide to the point where they actually seemed to fit his head for once. He looked at James with the same expression and James’ face eluded pure joy. If there was one thing James Potter could sense, it was someone he could take the piss out of. 

“James Potter.” He offered his hand which Vernon eyed with utter disdain. James lowered his hand back to his side, unfazed by the rejection. If anything he smiled wider. 

“This is my sister's fiancee, Vernon,” Lily gave James hand a squeeze. She knew his mischievous grin from anywhere. 

James ignored her signal. “Absolutely charmed.”

Vernon coughed at the mention of charm and Lily shot James a warning glance.

“Er—I was actually hoping to see you two before Petunia came back out—could we?” Vernon gestured over to a secluded spot in the lawn far away from any of the other guests. Lily and James followed him as Vernon made a little bit too much of a show of not wanting anyone to notice.

Before they could say anything Vernon’s wide eyes soured into a deep anger. He directed his words at Lily.

“I am well aware that we were obligated to invite you on the account of you being family, but I am just going to say this once: if you plan to have any sort of performances this evening that could spoil the night, I suggest you save it for whatever circus you came from. I’ll not be having your kind come and mess up my lovely evening.”

Lily’s cheeks flushed and her eyes became glassy. She had expected them to be rude, sure, but not downright hostile to her—and even in front of someone they had no reason to question.

James’ grin had disappeared and now his jaw was locked. “Excuse me–first off you can stop pointing at my girlfriend like that,” Lily had not noticed that Vernon had clutched a finger outwards between them during his little speech, “second, what exactly are you implying?” Lily grabbed hold of James’ forearm, but he shrugged it away. 

“James–it's fine, let me handle it.” Lily tried to sound stern, despite feeling shaken from being threatened by her own future brother in law.

“Well Vernon,” Lily’s eyes were slits, “I wasn’t planning on any performances as you call it, but seeing as you are being such a bloody arsehole—” 

James hid his laugh with a cough. Vernon’s eyebrows shot up his face, his cheeks reddened to the point of purple. Petunia, who had caught sight of their gathering from the window, came rushing out towards them, looking panicked. 

“Vernon darling, what has happened?” She whipped her head towards Lily. “What did you do already?”

“Well, your bloody freak sister and her punk boyfriend just insulted me—at my own party!” Petunia rubbed Vernon’s arm while darting her head to either side of the garden, hoping that no other party goers were listening in. 

“We didn’t say anything that wasn’t already provoked, you know for invited guests and family you haven’t exactly made us feel welcome,” James shot back. 

Petunia whispered some words into Vernon’s ear and he mumbled in response back. He shot James a dirty look before thundering back over to the drinks table where the men surrounded him once more. 

Petunia watched as he left and faked a sickly looking smile at the guests who glanced their way. She spun back towards Lily.

“You need to leave. I knew this would be a mistake.”

Lily’s face flushed. The battle between anger and sadness culminated into rosy blotches on her cheeks.

“Fine. We were just going anyway. This party is a drag. Come on James.”

Lily stormed back to the door and entered the house ahead of him. James opened his mouth to say something to Petunia, but she had already departed their corner and was chattering amongst the group of women, acting as though she hadn’t just banished her own sister from her party. 

James found Lily sitting on the front stoop of the house, sniffling and rubbing her eyes. 

He sat down next to her, procuring two cans of gin and tonic from his pocket. “Nicked these as a souvenir.”

 Lily let out a meek laugh and took one from his hand. He scooted closer and wrapped his arms around her, softly stroking her hair. 

“Sorry if I wasn’t a good teammate today,” he pushed his lips into her hair. 

“Nah, you were the best. Sorry my family is such shit—at least now you have witnessed it.”

“Yea, honestly—fuck ‘em.” Lily let out a real laugh this time and James leaned down to kiss it. 

“But, to be fair,” he continued, “ it's not everyday we get to take an excursion out of school and I get to see you in a bloody fantastic dress so, despite the tiny upset I’d say this was a success.” 

Lily leaned her head on his shoulder and took a breath. The sun was setting and the cool air was setting in. 

“What was it you promised me when we got back? To shag all my stress away?” The second it left Lily’s mouth, James’ body perked up.

“I mean, it was an awfully stressful night.”

“Yeah, awfully—we should definitely, definitely do something about that.”

James grabbed Lily’s hand and pulled her up. She laughed at his enthusiasm as he practically ran them past the gate and back onto the mainstreet where Sirius’ motorbike lay waiting for them. The night born anew.

[leighsartworks216]

Hi! I’ve been thinking about this for awhile.

Imagine Astarion walking in to see his s/o, only to see them on their knees groaning and looking uncomftarble, because of Haarlep and his promise. ”Everytime I make love with your body, you will know.”

Maybe Astarion could like try to comfort s/o through one of those times? Not in a sexual way, just doing his best to show that he’s there, maybe throwing a comment to distract them ”pretend it’s me.”

If you’re uncomftarble with this you can ignore it! Have a nice day/night!😊

I used they/them pronouns for Haarlep when applicable because the Narrator refers to them this way

References and dialogue taken from a scene in the game, transcribed by yours truly

Warnings: rape/non-con elements, swearing, crying, reference to victim blaming, references to past trauma/abuse

Word Count: 1,031

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It comes on like a violent shiver. You can feel hands all over you, tracing up and down your legs and chest, but you’re all alone in your tent. You try to ignore it, focus on a book or something. Anything. But it’s overwhelming. Haarlep is using your body to pleasure someone else and you can feel it all. Maybe for Raphael it was incredible - another layer of pleasure to heighten the experience. To you, it’s violating.

You curl into yourself, tugging your knees to your chest as you sit on the floor, and hiding your face from the lamp light. If you could curl up tight enough, maybe you could block it all out. It’s a useless attempt. You know nothing can stop it.

“Darling, you’re going to miss… Shit.” Astarion rushes to your side, the flap of the tent shutting out the rest of the world. He’s not sure if he should touch you, where he should touch you. But you’re shaking, and whimpering, and he wants more than anything to help. “Can I touch you?”

You lift your face from your knees, nodding as a groan tears from your throat. It should feel good, but it doesn’t. You want to squirm and dive into water and roll in the dirt - anything to get rid of the ghostly hands on your skin.

He wraps his arms around your shoulders and tugs you into him. His touch is more solid. He’s not a phantom taking pleasure in your image. You sigh with how real he feels. He brushes his fingers through your hair. “It’s the incubus, isn’t it?” he whispers by your ear. You nod and grab onto his arm. Your hands are trembling. “I’m so sorry, my love.”

“I can feel it, Astarion,” you gasp. You press your face into his chest. “Everything. Hands, just, all over me.” You can’t bear to speak out loud what else you feel. He can tell when your legs press tightly together.

“Tell me what I can do to help.”

Your mind is blank. You can’t think. You don’t know. You squirm closer to him and he draws your body into his lap, pressing his cheek to your head. He tries to be more firm in his touches. He scratches lightly at your scalp, tugs gently at the hairs at the nape of your neck. His hand runs up and down your arm, stopping only to press his fingertips against different locations that follow no consistent pattern. He can feel your tears against his skin, and he wishes more than anything to have killed that creature when they had the chance.

“Keep talking,” you whimper. A violent chill forces its way down your spine and you groan against his skin to avoid being too loud. He can’t imagine what the others would think or say.

When this happened before, it was in public. You couldn’t avoid it then, couldn’t rush somewhere private away from public eyes, and they scolded you. Told you to be quiet, teased you about liking it. It made his blood boil just thinking about it. It hadn’t been this bad then - the sound you made wasn’t out of disgust or discomfort.

“I know what it’s like to lose control over your own body. It’s a wretched thing.”

“I may as well just try to enjoy it.”

“I thought the same, once. It didn’t last. I know what’s done is done - you made your vow. But I’m sorry all the same.”

“Please,” you cry. “Please talk to me.”

He hushes you gently, pressing a soft kiss to your head. “It’s going to be okay, my dear. You’re going to get through this. And once these damn tadpoles are out of our heads, we’re marching right back to Avernus and killing that bastard.”

You chuckle, weak and wet, but it’s better than hearing you suffer. “Promise?”

“Do you even have to ask? I’d march down there tomorrow if we could.” He moves his hand from your arm to your leg. He rubs circles into your thigh with his thumb, applying various amounts of pressure as he does. Quietly, unsure, he whispers into your hair, “Can you pretend it’s me?”

He’s not sure if he wants you to, truthfully. But he’s willing to carry that weight if it means easing your suffering. It’s a sentimental thought, but it doesn’t last long as you shake your head. “They don’t touch me like you do.” There’s an edge of teasing in your voice, trying to make it a joke, but it doesn’t quite land.

“Good.” He wants to say something more, but nothing comes to mind. He’s almost… proud. Definitely possessive. If that incubus and whoever they're bedding now doesn’t know how to touch you in all the ways you enjoy, then Astarion won’t feel bad when he touches you. He would hate to ruin intimacy for you because Haarlep touches you the same way.

Your legs shake and you hold onto him desperately, wrapping an arm around him to dig your fingers into his back. You try not to dig too deep, try not to hurt him, even in your torture. It breaks his heart. A sound bubbles in the back of your throat, agonized and lewd. With just one touch of your hand to his cheek, he knows precisely what you’re asking for, and he captures your mouth with his own. It’s not romantic or sweet. It’s teeth clashing and swallowing every loud noise that would be louder if he pulled away. It’s offering you a final comfort as Haarlep desecrates you.

As your legs stop shaking, the phantom touches on your body fading, you kiss him softer, until you feel safe enough to pull away. You don’t hide your face again; you press your forehead to his. Your cheeks are flushed and stained with tears. He continues to play with your hair as he wipes them away.

“Thank you,” you whisper. A sob rises from your chest. “I’m sorry.”

He shushes you, pressing kisses to your cheeks and wrapping his arms around you. “It’s okay, my love. You’re okay. It’s not your fault. It will never be your fault. You’re okay.”

---

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@hypopxia

@flsalazar

@beverlybeav

@angelofthorr

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[outlaw-apologist]

Saved By The Gang | RDR2 x Reader

In which your SO saves you from your kidnappers! This was a request from AO3 :) Characters: Arthur, Hosea, Dutch, Sean, Charles GN!Reader Warnings for each story: Arthur: Graphic depictions of violence, cannibalism, and dismemberment Hosea: Graphic depictions of violence and human trafficking Dutch: Graphic depictions of violence, Dutch being himself Sean: Depictions of violence, use of strong language Charles: Graphic depictions of violence. Implied SA Notes: I kinda ended up writing these more from the characters POVs, so I hope that’s okay. I apologize for any errors of if my writing is bad. I’ve been struggling with insomnia so I'm not thinking great rn. I looked at this so much I kinda hate it lmao so I’m just gonna raw dog my mistakes :’) AO3 Link Arthur: Arthur had been gone for awhile doing the craziest things. He didn’t mean to be away from camp for so long, it just kinda happens. He decided to stop in Van Horn to finish up some quick business when he noticed your horse. Was it really-? Arthur’s eyes narrowed as he studied the markings on the horse’s coat. That definitely was your horse but you weren’t the one in the saddle. “Hey there partner.” Arthur made quick work crossing the road with long purposeful strides. “Where’d you get that there horse?”

The rider looked a bit flustered. “Isn’t’e a beaut? I found it just due south of Roanoke Valley all alone. Rider abandoned it so I thought I outta take ‘em in and give ‘em some good old lovin’.” “Roanoke Valley you say?” He scoffed. What the hell would you be doing up there? “Well, I know the owner of this fine horse and they wouldn’t just go off and leave like that. Where exactly did you find it?” “Listen Mister, I don’t want any trouble.” Agitation arose in the rider causing Arthur to throw his hands up in surrender. “No trouble here. I couldn’t care less about the horse. I just wanna make sure my friend is okay.” After careful consideration the stranger finally shrugged. “I found it drinking at the Kamassa river Northwest of Annesburg.” “Thank ya kindly.” Arthur tipped his head graciously. He hadn’t been up in that area before but the stories he heard weren’t great. This undoubtedly meant trouble. Arthur hardly mounted his horse before a bit of gossip reached his ears. “Another wagon disappeared near the mines. This time three women went missing.” “It’s gotta be that Murfree Brood. I heard they eat anyone they capture. Incestuous cannibals the lot of ‘em. Doubt we’ll ever see those poor women again.” “Shit!” A growl ripped from Arthur’s throat. His heels dug into his horse’s sides and he slapped the reigns. What if that were you? Kidnapped with those women? He needed to find you and fast. “C’mon Y/N. You better not be dead.” His heart pounded in his chest, wind whipping past as he cut off other riders on the trail in haste. He didn’t mean to be gone for so long… Away from YOU for so long… He always thought you understood it. His need to be everywhere and anywhere. And you did… You do… Yet, somehow, regret was eating at him like a deranged wolf. Snapping at the back of his mind, replaying memories upon memories of him returning to your arms after being away for ages. Arthur took for granted that you’d always be there when he gets back. He shouldn’t have left you as much as he does. He should have asked you to come with him. If you had business up in this region he could have been there to protect you. That horse is your world, he knows that. Maybe that’s why his mind was racing with so many regrets and thoughts.  That horse is your everything, if you weren’t on that horse you were probably seriously injured… or worse. That realization put a lot into perspective. It was always ‘What if I never return to Y/N?’ and never ‘What if Y/N never returns to me?’ “C’mon Morgan. Keep it together.” He had to shake these stormy thoughts away. Was it possible that he’d find you alright? Maybe a mild injury? Absolutely. But fuck, if it didn’t give him so much anxiety. Upon reaching the approximate area Arthur slowed his horse using gentle praises. “Easy now.” He reached out to pet it appreciatively, allowing his body filled with tension to drop down. Blue green eyes squinted while searching for clues or any sign of his beloved. Luckily Arthur picked up a few things while bounty hunting and it only took him ten or so minutes to find footprints he thinks matches yours. While following them he started noting how far apart your steps were. You were running. ‘Running from what?’ “Christ.” Arthur’s nose wrinkled just as the wind carried over the scent of rotting flesh. Sure enough there was a dead fellow not far from your tracks. The bullet casings surrounding the corps were definitely from your gun. Was this one of the cannibals? Arthur moved the body, flipping it over using his foot. He looked malnourished and white as paper. Even his clothes were rags. Arthur wasn’t really sure exactly what a cannibal looked like but if he had to take a guess, a cannibal would look like this feller right here. “Fuck, Y/N. What’ave you gotten yourself into?” Those sinking thoughts were back, dragging him into a pit of despair. Would he find your half eaten corpse somewhere in the woods? Are you still alive? Were you scared? You’re a shit significant other, Morgan. That’s what he told himself over and over again, shifting trough the bramble. What kind of man doesn’t know what his lover is up to? If he wasn’t so far up the ass of being ‘Arthur Morgan the big bad Outlaw’ he would know. Regret. Regret for not holding you in his arms every night. For not returning to you more often. He should have had more time with you. Should’ve spent every waking moment with you. How could he be so dense? This life was dangerous! He always stressed that to everyone who would listen. So why didn’t he spend all of his free time with you? None of you knew when your last breath would be taken, how could he waste so much precious life away from you? That fear only grew when those scared eyes focused on the disturbing image of human arms sewn together into some kind of hanging tree ornament. A gloved hand covered his mouth to suppress a gag. Gore wasn’t something that usually affected Arthur, but the thought that this could be you made him feel ill. At least he knew he was going in the right direction. It wasn’t long before he stumbled upon a couple of the Brood. He couldn’t hear the exact words being said because his ears immediately attuned to your cries of pain. Creeping closer in the grass, hand on his holster, Arthur grit his teeth at the scene playing out before him. Never in his life had he felt so much white hot rage. One of the sick fucks held you by the hair while another tried to pin you down. “We’re just gonna cut yer leg off!” He laughed. “What’re ya cryin’ for?” “No!” You screamed, desperately trying to fight against them. For three nights you watched in horror as the others captured were slaughtered, tortured, and eaten. Carved like Thanksgiving turkeys. For three whole nights you couldn’t sleep, drink, or eat because you were so terrified of these monsters. They saw how scared you were and they loved it. Milking every second of it. Because of your exhausted state fighting against them was grueling. “You killed our brother, it’s only fair.” A scream ripped through you just as your flesh tore against the blunt blade of a rusty sickle. “Get away!” Everyone froze, heads snapping towards the all too familiar voice. “Arthur?” “Y/N.” Arthur caught your gaze, a look of relief washing over him. You’re alive! “Hey! Who do you think you are coming hea-” The Brood member pulling your hair didn’t have enough time to finish his sentence before his head was blown off with a crackling BANG! Silence rang out after the loud pop from Arthur’s gun, then the mans body dropped. “You shot my brother!” “And I’ll shoot you too if you don’t get the fuck outta here!” With a click of his cattleman revolver, the last man scrambled up to run. “Too slow.” A dirty finger squeezed the trigger and down he fell. You simply stared as everything unfolded before you, your cries not subsiding but becoming much quieter. After all your pain and torment… All those people gutted like human sacrifices… Arthur killed your captors so easily. “Y/N.” His voice was gentle as he knelt beside you. Finally you shattered. Sobbing violently as soon as his arms enveloped you securely. You wanted to say his name. To tell him everything that had happened but couldn’t manage anything past blubbering incoherently. Never had Arthur felt so much heartbreak. Not from any loss or any breakup he had experienced so far. You’re one of the strongest people he knew. Seeing you look so small and afraid was devastating. Especially because this should have never happened to begin with. “I know.” Was all he could say. “Shhh, I know. You’re okay.” While embracing you with one arm he peered over to inspect your thigh. “I know darlin’, I don’t wanna let you go but I need to stop the bleeding.” He quickly hushed the whimper that passed your lips upon feeling his body shift away. Arthur’s fingers trembled, fumbling with his bandanna. Christ, this affected him more than he ever could’ve imagine. It took a minute but finally he managed to tie it above your wound to limit your bloodflow before immediately picking you up. Arthur made sure you could hide your face in his chest so you didn’t have to look at any of the hanging dismemberments on your way out. “God Y/N.” His arms around you were tight. “It’s okay. I’ll protect you. It’s okay now.” He tried to console you. To console himself. Hell, if he were in your shoes this would be more traumatizing for him than the Colm O’Driscolle ordeal. He could only imagine how you feel. Arthur couldn’t even bring himself to sit you on his horse yet. The moment you were in fresh woods he dropped to his knees and held you. Rocking you, kissing your hair and breathing in your scent. Sweet nothings fell from his lips in soft shaky whispers. Pads of calloused thumbs wiping away every tear from your cheeks. All you could do was cry and cling to him. All he could do was hold you as if it were for the last time. And it almost was. The last time. “How’d you find me?” After what seemed like hours of you two embracing each other, Arthur finally helped you onto his horse and you were on your way back to camp. “Saw some feller in Van Horn ridin’ your horse. Complete coincidence.” Arthur could feel how tense that statement made you so he added quickly, “Don’t worry. I’ll get your horse back. I just wanted to make sure you were safe first.” “Thank you, Arthur. For everything.” “I know how much you love that horse, it’s nothin’.” “No, I mean… Thank you for always being there when I need you.” Silence washed over the both of you. Arthur didn’t know how to respond. “I’m sorry darlin’.” You could feel him arm gently tighten around you in a loose hug. “I could’ve lost you tonight. I got to thinkin’ and… I know I haven’t been the best to you. I always prioritize everyone else. It shouldn’t be like that.” “Oh Arthur-” “I’m serious. I’ve lost Mary and Eliza. Most of my friends are long cold in their graves. I don’t know nothin’ about gods or divine intervention. Don’t know if something led me to you or not this time around….. I guess I was always feelin’ sorry for you because you’re datin’ a walkin’ target. Thought some space between us might do us some good in case I die. Never did I once consider life without you.” Arthur let out a hollow laugh which lacked any mirth or warmth. “What a fool I’ve been. I ain’t never learn my lesson. Tonight showed me that, that’s for damn sure. I dunno what you were doin’ out here but for now on if I leave camp I’m not going anywhere without you.” An exhausted smile reached your lips. “Good. My handsome man, it’s always been you and me. You just had to ask.” “You and me, huh? I like the sound of that.” You fell asleep in Arthur’s arms long before you reached camp. Arthur held you when you arrived, petting your hair as Ms. Grimshaw stitched up your leg. Arthur was needy after your attack. He never let you out of his sight and would always insist on holding you. Especially during nightmares that plagued you for months after the accident. Arthur stayed up singing to you and rocking you for many many long nights. And, of course, he got your horse back! How he did it or by what means, you didn’t care to ask. Slowly life returned to normal and the incident was long behind you both. Arthur kept his promise to take you everywhere until the very end. ___ Hosea: Five minutes. He took his eyes off of you for FIVE minutes so he could speak to the owner of a fence in San Denis while you waited for him outside, and you were gone. “Y/N?” He called out in confusion, scanning the sidewalks and streets for any sign of you. At first he’s annoyed. Did you wander off without saying anything? Hosea waved over the nearest group of men lingering nearby. “Good day. You wouldn’t happen to have seen my associate hanging around out here, would you? They seemed to have disappeared.” One of the men nodded. “Oh yeah, some nasty business I tell ya.” Well shit. “Nasty?” Hosea cocked his head, resting his hand over his holstered gun. “How so?” “These crazies came and bonked them over the head, saying they owed money or somthin’. Decided to mind my own business because they’re all brandishing guns.” “Money, huh? What way did they go?” “That way.” He pointed Eastward. “Towards the docks.” Tipping his hat, Hosea made his way down the sidewalk. He looked both ways before crossing the road, grabbing onto the trolley as it passes, riding the step until he reached the docks. The sun was setting but he knew your form like the back of his hand. It wouldn’t be too hard to spot you against the fire of the sky. However, you nor the supposed men were anywhere in sight. “Excuse me.” He flagged down a sailor and asked him if he’s seen you. He had not. Neither had the other five people he asked. Hosea knew this wasn’t good. The trail ran cold, leaving him hopeless.  There was nothing he could do but return to Shady Belle with a heavy heart. As your husband he was always supposed to protect you. Never in a million years did he think you’d be snatched away right under his nose. Mounting Silver Dollar, Hosea struggled to hold his tears at bay. The city was starting to suffocate him and he needed to leave in order to breathe and think. The weight of the world was finally settling into his old bones on the ride back. The horror the gang had experienced the last few months was devastating. The Blackwater incident aside – Arthur’s escape from Colm, Sean’s death, little Jack’s kidnapping…. Dutch wasn’t listening to reason anymore. The gang was in shambles and now… He let out a defeated sob, hanging over his horse for privacy. What was he supposed to do without you? You’re all he has left. His entire world. What if he wouldn’t be able to find you? It all happened so quickly. To think only an hour ago you were fixing his shirt collar, hanging on his arm with a smile on your face and now POOF! Gone. This was the last drop in the bucket for Hosea. Suddenly he couldn’t stop his tears no matter how hard he tried. He was tired. So god damn tired. Silver Dollar slowed to a stop just off the road. If anyone who passed-by peered close enough through the darkness they could make out the silhouette of a broken man with his head in his hands. He kicked himself for stalling your rescue. Precious time finding you, wasted. By the time he made it back to camp it was late into the night. Dragging himself up the stairs of Shady Belle he knocked on the door to Dutch’s room. Candlelight could be seen flickering through the crack of the doorway leading to Hosea believe he must still be awake. Silence. He knocked again, this time Hosea could hear the bed squeak. “You better have a good reason to disturb me.” Those words flew sharply through the cold humid air. “Dutch…” Hosea would have cursed himself for sounding so… weak. Calling out his friend’s name with a wavering voice. It was noticeable enough to immediately draw Dutch’s attention. The bed squeaked under Dutch’s weight then heavy footsteps led to the door. Hosea kept his gaze down, watching Dutch’s shadow as he moved until the door creaked open and the faint candlelight illuminated Hosea in contrast against the inky hallway. “Hosea- What happened?” “Y/N… I don’t know, it all happened so fast.” Wrapping an arm around Hosea, Dutch led him inside, guiding him to sit. “What happened to Y/N?” “I was looking for a buyer for the bonds we have left, asked them to wait outside because I was just going to be a moment. I stepped out and Y/N was gone. Apparently a group of men took them towards the docks. I tried not to arouse suspicion, I-… Maybe I should’ve gotten there faster, I don’t know…” He shook his head as if to clear it. “Y/N wasn’t there. I may have been too late.” “Someone just took them? In broad daylight?” “Just like that.” Hosea snapped his fingers. “Somethin’ aint right.” Rubbing his chin quizzically, Dutch began pacing the room. “Y/N isn’t stupid, they would’ve screamed or something. You really didn’t hear anything?” He paused to watch Hosea shake his head. “Are you thinking what I’m thinking?” Staring down at his hands, Hosea slowly uncurled his fingers, watching the light dance over his palms. “It was a setup.” “It was a setup.” His friend repeated. “But by who?” “Could be Milton.” “I don’t think so. He’s a thorn in our side. If it were Milton he would’ve showed up in our camp already. Waving Y/N around like a prize.” “That’s very true…” Hosea only looked up when he heard Dutch abruptly halt. “It can’t be….” “What?” “Perhaps… Bronte had a hand in this? I don’t think we’ve done anything to cross him but he’s the only man in the city who could kidnap anyone in broad daylight and not a soul would tell.” He could feel the relief wash through him, the possibility bringing him a weird sense of comfort. He hoped it was Bronte. That would mean you’re probably safe and sound somewhere just like Jack was. “We’ll get Y/N back, Hosea. Let me pull some strings. We’ll find them.” The strings were pulled quite quickly as Hosea found himself waiting outside yet another fabulous party for Arthur to return. “It wasn’t Bronte.” His heart sank. “It wasn’t? Are you sure?” “Pretty sure.” Arthur leaned against the residential fence while lighting a cigarette. He was gussied up to fit the mood. “Asked around ‘n’ nobody had a clue what I was sayin’. I did, however, get this.” Held out between two fingers was a business card. Interested, Hosea accepted it. “Exotic Imports and… Impurities?” “Human trafficking. They apparently have these masquerade parties where rich folk can bid on people anonymously. I think that’s where Y/N is.” God… Was Saint Denis truly such a shit hole? He knew this place was low, but a human trafficking ring? “Are you sure?” Arthur met Hosea’s gaze with the most sincere look he could muster. “Hosea-” “I know you wouldn’t lie to me dear boy.” “I heard someone mentioning there’ll be an auction there this Friday. They mentioned someone who sounds pretty darn close to Y/N’s description in the lineup. I’ll scope the place out, maybe we can rescue Y/N sooner than that. And if not…” Hosea tucked the card into his pocket. “I guess we’re attending the masquerade.” Arthur knows how much you and Hosea are sweet on each other. How hard it was for Hosea after Bessie’s passing and how you brought life back into him. Arthur would do anything for you. So when he had to scope out where the auction will take place he took the job very seriously. He wanted to get you out as soon as possible if you were really there. The place was heavily armed, much to his dismay. An open window was easy enough to sneak into but getting you out was near impossible. He couldn't even find you. However, in a back room Arthur discovered a pile of discarded clothing. A shoe caught his eye, one he knew you wore often. Before he was able to grab it Arthur had to leave as the area filled with guards. “Y/N is in there alright. Too busy for me to get ‘em.” He reported back upon his return to camp. That’s how Hosea, Dutch, Arthur, Bill, Micah, and Charles found themselves attending one of the most unnerving ‘parties’ in San Denis on a muggy Friday evening. They looked expensive, dressed down to the newest shoes on the market. Each donning their own masquerade mask. The building looked beautiful. Expensive. Guest flooded the entrance. “Guns aren’t allowed at this event.” A doorman held his hands out while the gang handed over their weapons. They weren’t worried. If everything was going according to plan John and Javier should already be inside posing as security. Upon entering the mansion, the gang mingled and sweet-talked everyone they could. Trying to get information, word of your safety, anything. One by one they slipped out of the room to John or Javier who gave their guns back to them before joining the guests in the auction room. The auction room was massive, theatrical even. Women in glorious gowns, men who’s suits cost more than a house, they all gathered with glasses filled with alcohol of their choosing. Chatting and laughing as if they’re about to watch a play. Hosea’s stomach churned. The curtains opened to reveal the first person to be auctioned. It was a young girl trembling and sobbing. He gripped the armrest of his seat, knuckles turning white. One by one these people were being bid on. “7,000 dollars. Do I hear 7,000 dollars? 7,500. 8,000 to the man in white!” All of this stress made him want to down glass after glass of alcohol. If he didn’t need to be clear headed he would’ve. “Next up, folks, is person number 9.” You were shoved onstage. Even though your face was covered he recognized you immediately. Almost a week ago you were idly waiting outside, gazing down at your clothing trying to fix a button when you were struck from behind. Blurry vision greeted you after, god only knows how long you were unconscious. Blinking it away you tried to move but to no avail. Hands and feet bound, you were left alone in a cold room. Little light trickled into your cell. You could hear the cries and pleas of other people who were presumably prisoners too. Every time you tried to snap at or fight against the guards they beat you. They fed you just enough food and water to keep you barely alive. It was hell. Every night you prayed someone would find you. Anyone! Hosea, Arthur- were they looking for you? It had been so long…. “Get up.” You snapped awake with a groan as you were kicked. The guard pulled you up, dragging you to get washed and dressed. Stumbling into a back room after being shoved, you blinked at all the faces staring back at you. These were the people you heard crying at night. “What’s happening?” You whispered. Only one woman was brave enough to speak up. Her low voice shook with emotion. “They’re selling us.” “What!?” “Be quiet or I’ll make you quiet!” A guard snarled at you, causing you to shy away. For hours you listened silently to the auction from backstage. Was this really happening? It felt so surreal. Fear filled you as the line moved forward until you were next. A bag was forced onto your head so you couldn’t see. Fingers dug into your arms, you could feel yourself being dragged onto the stage, causing you to stumble. “Next up, folks, is person number 9.” Your breath hitched painfully. Heart racing loudly. This is it. You were about to be sold as person number 9. Bracing yourself for the bidding a loud boom crackled beside you, so loud it made your ears ring. Your head snapped in the direction it came from. Not being able to see anything, panic arose within you as the screams and sounds of running reached you. The crowd was fleeing for their lives! Gunshots popped off in the surrounding area. You ducked down in case any bullets flew your way. “Y/N!” “H-Hosea?” The bag was lifted off your head, beaming lights above glared into your eyes causing you to squint. Hosea’s face slowly came into view. He wrapped his arms around you, throwing you over his shoulder. “I’d love to have a romantic reunion with you, my dove, but I’m afraid we’re in the midst of a shootout.” “I can see that.” You groaned, hanging onto him. For an older man he sure did carry you with ease while shooting his way out with the gang backing him up on either side. “Hosea, let’s go!” Dutch shot the guard who blocked off the door. Hosea had to pass you to Arthur, who barreled through a cloud of bullets with you safely tucked in his arms. He was able to reach the rendezvous carriage, placing you inside before anyone else could enter. Hosea slid in and gathered you in his arms. “Drive, damn it!” He called out, causing the carriage to lurch violently before moving. “Oh Y/N. Oh my little dove.” He carefully looked you over as tears filled your eyes. You were shaking, veins pumping with adrenaline. Your rescue happened so quickly it made your head dizzy. Hosea’s hands were gentle as he touched you in case anything hurt or scared you in your shaken state. He examined every inch. Face was pensive, while taking in every mark and bruise on your delicate skin. “Are you seriously hurt anywhere?” “No.” You whispered, pressing against your husband for comfort. He gladly held you, kissing your lips over and over again. “I’m sorry it took me so long my love. I shouldn’t have let you out of my sight.” Hosea rest his head atop yours and rubbed circles on your back soothingly. “Let’s get you back to camp and fed.” “Thank you.” You nuzzled him, breathing in his comforting scent. “I knew you’d come for me. I missed you.” “I missed you too.” The rest of the ride was quiet. When the carriage parked outside of Shady Belle, Hosea scooped you up immediately. You gasped as the whole gang rushed  over to greet you. “Y/N’s back!” Abigail announced. “Oh Y/N, I’m so glad you’re safe!” Mary-Beth gushed with relief. Even Pearson was there to see you. “Welcome home Y/N. Camp ain’t the same without ya.” “Thank you everyone.” You let out a watery laugh, heart filled with love. You were so appreciated amongst this group and it showed. Hosea brought you inside, cleaning you carefully. He asked if anything hurt or if anyone touched you and you responded with yes or no. He clothed you in his own clothes, hoping his scent would bring comfort. A warm bowl of stew was pushed into your hands. Hosea held you while you ate and snuggled you up until you went to bed. He played with your hair all night, unable to sleep after losing you. ___ Dutch: Dutch doesn’t notice you’re gone until the ransom note arrives. “$3,000 in exchange for your lover?” He scoffed. “Who does he think he is? We’ll light his ass up.” The page was quickly crumpled in his hand. Dutch felt a deadly fury rise in him so great his own blood ran colder than the Upper Montana river. Colm O'Driscoll won’t get away with it this time. Not after what he’s done to Dutch’s past lover and to Arthur. “Dutch, I think we should be cool about this one. He already captured me to draw you in for the Pinkertons. He’s probably not done try’nna cut his deal with ‘em. If we ride in hot-” “Not now, Arthur. A few Pinkertons we can handle. This is Y/N we’re talking about, for Christ’s sake.” He scoffed, face snarling up in anger. “Y/N would have come for you, dear boy, had we known you were taken. Y/N would have come for you.” Arthur heaved out a sigh. He still wasn’t fully well after the green gang shot him up. “I know, Dutch. I love Y/N just as much as anyone. We ain’t ever leave one of us behind. I just think… If they want to draw us in they’ll treat Y/N right. If it’s a trap it’ll make more sense for us to come in quiet and get Y/N outta there safely.” “We don’t have time!” Dutch grabbed his gun, much to Arthur and Hosea’s exasperation. “Dutch, I know you love Y/N, but I think Arthur may be right.” “Who’s side are you on, Hosea? If that were you we would already be on the road.” He waved his gun around before holstering it. The air in camp was tense. Dutch seemed… Unsettled. Unpredictable. His eyes were crazy. Love made him crazy. “Who’s with me? John, Micah, Bill?” John and Arthur exchanged looked while Bill jumped up eagerly. Micah seemed interested but didn’t bother grabbing anything extra like the others. “I’m comin’ with you.” Arthur’s shoulders fell. He followed Dutch through camp up to The Count which Dutch mounted with ease. “No, dear boy. You rest. Watch the camp with Hosea, we should be back before dawn.” “Alright, if you say so. Be careful out there Dutch. Things are getting nasty. Bring Y/N home.” “Oh, I intend to.” With the rescue party ready Dutch rode out with his boys. “If you see an O’Driscoll, shoot. If you see a Pinkerton, shoot. We leave no one alive. Not even the women. If Colm wants to play, we’ll play. By our rules.” John moved up beside Dutch, calling out over the whistling wind. “Are you sure about this Dutch? What if Y/N gets hurt?” “Y/N isn’t getting hurt.” The words were spoken as if John’s idea was ludicrous. “Now you boys know how I feel about Y/N. And I-… Well, call me foolish, but I’ll never let any man, beast, or tycoon lay a finger on the love of my life. The moment we slaughter his sons he’ll know we mean business. Colm is many things, but stupid he is not. He knows hurting Y/N would give us cause to burn his world down piece by piece and I don’t think he could take the heat.” “As is your right, Dutch.” Micah spoke up. “The O'Driscolls should know by now you’re a kind and just man. I’m sure they understand the reckoning hurting their assets would bring.” Feeding into Dutch’s anger pleased the gang leader. “That’s what I thought.” He agreed. The rest of the ride was tense with anticipation. John knew there was nothing he could say. He just hoped you’d survive all of this. Dutch was getting sloppy and with you involved… He would slaughter the whole world if he had to. “We’re here.” Dutch announced. Night had long fallen by the time they reached the O’Driscoll hideout. “Let’s make a little noise. Micah-” Riding closer to the compound, Micah lit a stick of dynamite, throwing it over the fence. Dutch watched with great pleasure as the O’Driscoll boys caught in the blast began to scream. “Let’s show them you don’t fuck with Dutch van der Linde.” The guns came out. Time slowed down, men began to rush at them. The Count reared, spooked by the sudden barrage of bullets. Dutch shot every single O’Driscoll effortlessly, one by one. You were beginning to think Dutch wasn’t coming. Why would he after Arthur outed Colm’s setup a week ago? They had kicked your face in until your mouth filled with blood and your nose cracked in three different places. Breathing was hard with your damaged ribs. The O’Driscoll’s wasted no time in beating you to a bloody pulp before tying you up. The way you were tied was ridiculous. Your hands and feet were tied separately then were tied together to ensure you wouldn’t be able to move an inch. You guessed Arthur’s escape was a sore spot. You struggled and fought until the ropes dug angry marks, rubbing the skin away. In all honestly you usually would have half a mind to spit at or curse any O’Driscoll out, however this seemed different. It was grim, very grim. You remember how scary it was watching Arthur collapse off his horse barely alive and wondered – would you make it? Surely they won’t let an escape happen again... Dutch would probably move camp, you thought. And if you could survive… I don’t know, a week longer, he’ll come and get you. These were the thoughts running through your head while you tried to plan your survival. ‘It’ll be torture, but I can last that long’, you reassured yourself. It didn’t work. Colm killed Dutch’s girl way back, what’s stopping him from doing it again? You knew the man had a nasty streak to him. And Dutch… well... killing you sure would make Dutch slip up enough to get caught. That bastard Colm just wanted to see him hang. Many many thoughts occupied your mind as you dozed off. Aches and pains were screaming at you so being unconscious was probably best. At the brink of sleep you were jolted wide awake by a loud explosion. You froze, halting your breath, straining your ears to listen. Silence. What’s going on? BANG BANG BANG! Dutch- It had to be him! Your face lit up with hope, eyes fixated on the door. Any minute now... The O’Driscoll’s screamed, cursed, and cried out. “Get ‘em!” “Don’t let them inside!” “We gotta hold this for Colm!” Despite anticipating its happening you still flinched back when the door was kicked in. “Y/N.” Dutch sighed out of relief. Kneeling down he cut you loose, brushing the hair from your face. You both were quiet. Just taking each other in. You because you had missed him, and him because he was stunned by how badly you were beaten. “Those animals. We’ll make ‘em pay.” Dutch’s words were said more to himself than to you. “I’m alright, I can walk, I think-” Helping you up, Dutch’s eyes filled with sadness when he noticed you wincing. He could hear your chest heave with pain and it was grading against his eardrums. “I’ll carry you. Just hang on, we haven’t cleared them all yet.” Scooping you into his chest, your arms were granted purchase around his neck. Dutch was stronger than he looked. He held onto you with one arm wrapped tightly to secure you while shooting any man who ran this way with the other. “Bastards! They’re everywhere! John, Micah, let’s go!” “You get Y/N?” John asked after shooting three more men. There were so many O’Driscolls they couldn’t even take their eyes off them to check on you. “Yeah. Let’s get outta here.” Micah covered Dutch’s right while John covered his left and back. They shot the best they could until finally they were free of the building. Dutch placed you on The Count, climbing behind you. The others quickly mounted seeing as there was no way they’d win this gun battle if they stayed. “Shit! Incoming!” Bill cried out, alerting everyone to the drove of Pinkerton galloping straight towards the gang’s direction. “God dammit!” Jerking the reigns, Dutch kicked his horse into action. “This way, c’mon! Let’s lose them through the trees. We gotta hope we can outrun them.” There you were, rocketing towards salvation on a white horse. Pinkertons and O’Driscolls crashing down around you like violent ocean waves. There was so much noise to the point where your ears rang in an effort to tune it all out. Breath didn’t leave your body. Time slowed. You watched in horror. Every bullet shot by John seemed to take ages before knocking down its opponent. Bill was screaming yet not a word of it reached you. You could feel Dutch’s arm wrap tighter and tighter around your waist. Suddenly you’re soaring through the air, hair flying back against the dusty breeze. This was it. The moment of truth. The Count’s feet touched down  after leaping over a fence and suddenly time returned to normal and everything sped up in your race for life. Your heart thuds erratically, clammy hands clinging to the saddle for dear life. “Duck!” Dutch ordered and you immediately lowered your head before a low hanging branch creamed you. You stayed low Dutch’s body now covering you protectively. You couldn’t see and had no idea what was going on. Your own breathing was so loud at this point it took you awhile to register – the shooting had stopped. There was no more screaming, no more calling out or angry orders being shouted. Only the sound of four horses huffing and puffing and your own shaky breaths filled the air. “My love… Are you alright?” Dutch lifted himself off of you, his horse slowing to rest. “I…. I think so.” You gazed down at your hands and arms before looking at Dutch with wide traumatized eyes. “Oh, my little bird. I’m so sorry they hurt you. I came as soon as I could. They’ll pay for this.” Something sinister swirled behind his eyes but his fingers were gentle against your skin while caressing your face. “Come now, let’s get you cleaned up and to bed. You need rest.” Dutch kissed your shoulder. “I’m so glad you’re here now. So glad.” ___ Sean: Sean thought you were mad at him. Avoiding him for some awful comment he made because he, yet again, went too far. It hurt his feelings but he decided you’d probably come back when you were ready to see him again. “Sean, have you seen Y/N?” Mary-Beth asked. “I haven’t seen Y/N since yesterday morning.” Sean’s heart fell to the pit of his stomach. You weren’t the type to leave camp often or without someone accompanying you. “Christ, I haven’t. Where’d you last see them?” “Over by Kieran. I already asked him and he said Y/N helped with the horses then wandered off.” “An’ no one saw them come back?” He began power walking through camp, searching the area for you. “Has anyone seen Y/N?” Tilly and Uncle shook their heads, John just gave a shrug. “That isn’t weird to any of yous?” His voice was raised enough to get the attention of Arthur who had just rode in. “What’s goin’ on now?” “Y/N is fucking missing and no one said a damn word about it.” “Alright, alright calm down. I’m sure we can find them, where were they last?” “Oh I don’t know English, lemme just take this crystal ball out of my ass-” Sean rolled his eyes while grabbing his gun. “We’re gonna have to track them down. Think you can do that?” “Well…” Arthur wipes the sweat from his brow. “Charles taught me a few things.” He paused, gently catching Sean’s shoulder. “I know you’re upset but I need you to keep your head. I’m sure wherever Y/N is they’re okay. We’ll get them back safe.” “Speak for yourself, I always keep my wits.” “That right there is what I’m worried about.” Arthur huffed while mounting his horse. Sean was silently grateful for Arthur’s words though he’d never admit it. There was a storm churning inside of him. An ocean of guilt rocking his consciousness. If only he respected your boundaries and didn’t make that joke maybe you wouldn’t have gone missing. “We’ll bring Y/N back safe.” He repeated to himself, climbing onto his saddle. Arthur gave him an affirmative nod. They rode around the outskirts of Clemens Point looking for any sign of you. Sean felt like throwing up the whole entire time. Suspense was killing him. “Over here!” Air left his lungs in relief as soon as Arthur’s voice broke through the thick air. Walking his horse over, that relief was short lived. “Fuck.” Sean hissed. Arthur held a ripped piece of fabric clearly bloodied. The fabric was from something you wore often making it was unmistakable. “Looks like three riders were here. ‘Dunno who they could be, but…” Morgan hesitated, knowing Sean probably shouldn’t hear the next part. “There was quite the struggle.” The Irishman cursed, kicking at a nearby stone, sending it throttling into the trees. “I’ll kill every last one of ‘em! I swear it.” The Van der Linde boys followed the hoof prints best they could, using other clues to figure out what way your kidnappers may have turned when the trail disappeared. With each passing minute Sean’s knuckles turned more and more white around his reigns. “I shouldn’t have said anything. This is my fault.” His feelings were so big inside of him they spilled out of his lips like a broken dam. “I’m a right bastard.” “You two have a fight?” “Sort of… We was fuckin’ around and Y/N got sick of me and asked me to stop teasing them but they look so cute when they’re angry I just- I don’t know.” He hung his head. Arthur studied him silently as they rode. “Well… Sounds about right for you two. I’m sure Y/N wouldn’t blame you.” “Maybe not, English, but I blame myself. I just hope they’re okay.” They didn’t talk any more after that unless to comment on the path changing. A few hours away from camp they came across smoke indicating a fire, right in the general direction of your kidnappers. “Must be them.” Sean was ready to charge in, but Arthur’s hand shot out across Sean’s chest, stopping him in his tracks. “We should get to higher ground first, see what we’re dealing with.” “Are you crazy? Y/N could be there!” “That’s exactly why we can’t rush in like fools! What happened to keepin’ your wits? Do you want Y/N getting shot?” Sean’s mouth opened and closed, words getting choked up in his throat. The thought of you getting shot was about to bring tears to his eyes. Shoulders slumping forward, he sucked in a shuddering breath. “Let’s go look up that hill.” “That’s better.” Arthur snapped his kicked his feet, leading his horse higher with Sean close behind. Sean wasn’t playing around now. Knowing you might be close and that you were probably hurt- It took everything in him to quench ranging fire burning within. He whipped out his binoculars, setting eyes on the men surrounding the campfire. “Stupid Lemoyne fucks.” “Do you see Y/N?” Arthur asked. Sean moved his binoculars with his turning head. “I’ve got eyes on them. They’re tied to a wagon just outside of where they’re sitting.” He bit his lip while taking in your sorry form. You were filthy, bloodied, and your face was swollen. They clearly didn’t treat you kindly. “Let’s kill those fucks, Morgan. My baby needs me.” Without another word Sean tucked the binoculars away, charging full force down the hill, cattleman revolver in hand. He managed to shoot one guy in the throat, ducking on his horse to avoid the flying bullets. His horse galloped straight for you, stopping just shy with the intention of creating a barrier between you and the shootout. Arthur did most of the shooting while Sean nearly flung himself off his horse to cut you free. “Oh my baby! What did those bastards do to you?” He gently cleaned your face with his handkerchief, ignoring all the gory sounds echoing from behind. Sean didn’t even notice when everything became silent. You had his full undivided attention. “Sean!” You wept, wrapping your arms around his neck to bury your face into his chest. “I’m sorry baby. I should’ve never let you out of my sight. I’ve got you, my rose. I’m here now.” He kissed your hair, rubbing your back. “Did they hurt you real bad?” Tears now stung his eyes when you nodded. It was difficult seeing you this way. He loves you more than anything else in the world, seeing his partner so beaten and broken- “Shhhh. We’ll make it better.” Sean attempted to calm his tears, crying silently while burying his face in your hair. His chest was warm and welcoming after what you’ve endured. Even though every bone in your body ached all you wanted to do was hug him and you were grateful he didn’t pull away immediately and put you on a horse. “I love you. So much. I was so scared.” You whimpered. “I know, I know I’m so sorry Y/N. About everything. I should’ve never pushed your buttons. I thought you ran away.” “What?” You pulled away in confusion, studying his face. “Sean… You think I’m upset about that?” It was cute seeing Sean feel guilty over a minor playful argument, something you both have often, and you couldn’t help but to giggle. “Don’t be silly.” You reached up, wiping away his tears. Confused, Sean gently caught your hand, pressing kisses to your palm while examining the bruising on your skin. “I guess that’s who I am when I’m with you, Y/N. A silly man. C’mon now.” Carefully you were scooped up into a loving embrace. Sean placed a peck on your lips. He was afraid of hurting you further so he treated you as though you were made of glass. Once you were in his saddle he pulled himself up behind you. “Let’s get you to camp, baby. I’ll make you feel better there.” “Thank you.” You pressed your back against him in relief. Exhaustion flooded your still trembling body. You never had any doubt Sean would come for you but the experience of the Lemoyne Raiders kicking your face in was rather traumatic. “Glad to see you’re okay L/N.” Arthur shot you a little smile. “Sean here was real riled up about your disappearance. Nearly bit my head off.” A faint smile crossed your lips. You winced as your skin pulled on a bruise. “Thank you for coming too, Arthur. If you weren’t here I don’t think he would have been able to rescue me.” “Oh not this again!” Sean groaned. His arm was wrapped loosely around you and he still pressed an odd kiss to your hair here or there. “I would've done just fine!” “You shot one bullet!” Arthur pointed out with a laugh. “Then you flung yourself over your lover like some actor in one of those dramas. If I weren’t here you and Y/N would be riddled with holes by now.” “I love you Arthur Morgan, but shut up. I killed that fellow with one shot! ONE!” “What was stopping you from killing the rest of ‘em?” “Y/N needed me!” “See if I didn’t come-” “Shut up Morgan!” Listening to their familiar arguments was the best welcome home you could’ve ever wished for. Your eyes fell shut as you listened and soon the pain shooting through you and the exhaustion of being awake and afraid all night  started catching up. Slowly your body fell limp against Sean’s chest. You were only faintly aware of his arm tightening around you, keeping you safely on the horse. It was pitch black when you came to. Fear shot you awake, your eyes scanning the darkness. “Sean?” You could hear an exhausted exhale to your right, a hand reached out from the black to gently pet your hair. “I’m here baby.” There was some fumbling then a match lit, illuminating your lover who had fallen asleep sitting next to you. Sean lit a lantern and that’s when you noticed you were laying in Arthur’s cot. “We thought it best to give you some privacy until you’re in tip top shape. Said I wasn’t allowed to sleep with you in it though.” Sean leaned forward, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “I’m just glad to have you back. Get some rest, no one will hurt you now. I’m here.” Relaxing again your fingers laced with Sean’s as you settled back in to sleep. ____ Charles: Charles usually minded his own business whenever you fucked off outta camp for a few days. You had been running with the gang far longer than he has and everyone knew you to be quite capable. God only knows what you’re up to half the time. Similar to Arthur, you’d go off and do your own thing then return with money or a fresh kill and a story of your adventures. Charles likes that about you. He admires your independence and how you have so much strength. When you didn’t show up to camp for a week he didn’t think anything of it. You were probably off climbing waterfalls or helping strangers. The gang carried on as normal unless Dutch wanted to offload a job onto you, then he’d ask around. “Charles.” Dutch called him over with a waggle of his finger. He already heard him calling your name and asking the ladies if they’ve seen you so Charles had an inkling as to what this was about. “Can you go find Y/N? I don’t care what it takes, just get their ass over here. We have money to make.” Charles didn’t mind being asked. Any reason to get some peace and quiet and reunite with you was a good reason in his eyes. The problem was, you were flightly, and your tracks were old. It has rained twice since you left camp. Charles followed your prints the best he could. Up into Strawberry, then to Mt.Shann where he took a break to enjoy the view and watch the birds. Charles smiled a little when he saw you had set camp there at one point. It was a beautiful place to stay, he would have done the same. He then doubled back to Owanjila lake where you had your second camp. He wondered what you were doing in the area, having absolutely no clue. He did, however, chuckle to himself when he found one of your gloves that you must have dropped. “Oh, Y/N.” The words slipping from his lips were fond and warm. He scooped the glove up deciding to store it in Taima’s saddle bag then he carried on his way. Charles began to get confused when your trail led straight back to Valentine. So… you were close to camp and didn’t stop by to rest your horse or grab supplies? That’s very unlike you. These tracks were fresher, not more than a few days old if even. Your lover became frustrated when entering town as the hoof prints belonging to your horse became lost in the bustle of main street and Charles couldn’t pick them up again. “Excuse me. Have you seen-” He began stopping residence of Valentine, asking of your whereabouts. You had been seen at the arms store and according to the man at the front desk of the Saints Hotel you stopped by for a wash only a day before. Well… If you were here yesterday you’ll probably be back at camp soon. After thanking the clerk, Charles returned to Horseshoe Overlook to inform Dutch you’d be back soon. The next day Charles awoke early. “Mr. Smith, can you please go into town and get us some supplies? Normally L/N does it but they ain’t back yet. Ms. Grimshaw ain’t too pleased.” He was attempting to enjoy his early morning coffee when Karen approached him. “Sure.” He set his cup down, accepting the list. “Did Pearson add what he needed?” “He only asked for corn.” He raised a brow in amusement, sharing a knowing look with Karen. “I understand.” Tucking it away safely Charles finished his coffee, throwing the rest out, then made his way to Taima. Your whereabouts weighed heavily on his mind during his ride into Valentine. ‘I miss Y/N’, he thought to himself ‘I hope they return soon’. Camp just wasn’t the same without you. He liked the gang alright but he liked you more. Valentine was a breath of fresh air after Blackwater. Quite literally. Charles took deep breaths, breathing in the crisp mountain air before entering town. Taima was soon hitched outside the general store where Charles leisurely strolled in. He walked around, footsteps echoing in the empty room as he gazed at the shelves. The clerk wasn’t there. “Hello?” He called out. Soon, sound of a door being swung open and rushed footsteps up the stairs filled the silence from what he assumed must have been the store room. “I’ll be right with you.” You were bound painfully tight. Ropes dug into your skin until your wrists bled. Tied to a chair and gagged. It had all happened so fast. Days ago you were going about business as usual. You stocked your ammo; took a nice long bath; and followed a dog around you wanted to pet before returning to camp, and of course, to the arms of Charles. What can you say? You love dogs and this one was particularly funny. You had grinned to yourself, studying the animal as you followed it out back. You didn’t expect to look up and be met with the stares of men who were clearly in the middle of an illegal operation. “Shit!” Your hand flew to your holster then froze as you heard a click and felt the barrel of a gun pressed to the back of your head. Your hands slowly rose as you tried to eye whoever was behind you. “Well well well, look what we have here, fellers.” “Real unfortunate, ain’t it?” You narrowed your eyes but kept silent. O’Driscolls by the looks of ‘em. “Hey…” A tall one began circling you, looking you over as if you were bait. “I remember you. You run with the Van der Linde boys, don’tcha?” This wasn’t good. “I think you’ve mistaken, mister.” “No… No I recognize you alright.” He stopped in front of you, leaning so close you had to recoil when the stench of his foul breath hit your face. “This isn’t your lucky day-” Before you could react he drew his elbow back and punched you so hard you nearly flew to the ground. Quiet laughs rang out among the group. Pain overcame you when one grabbed you by the hair, literally dragging you into the basement of their operation where you were hastily tied up and beaten several times among other unsavory happenings. For days you starved. Your face swollen beyond recognition. Only did the grocer show you any compassion. Feeding you water while muttering little ‘I’m so sorry, I wish we could let you go’s. He was a nervous man… A sweaty man. Hell you’d be nervous too if a gaggle of insane Irishmen took over the basement of your shop. You appreciated his little kindness but the weight of the situation was never lost on you. You needed to get out and soon, or else they’ll kill you. You thought of Charles and your beloved friends Arthur, Mary-Beth, and Lenny. Were they looking for you? Did they ever realize you disappeared? Today repeated the last two. The second the O’Driscolls noticed you were conscious their abuse started again up until mid morning when they left to take care of some business. The clerk made his way into the basement, removing your gag so he could give you water. “I’m sorry but you have to understand. If I let you go they’ll kill me.” You were too tired to argue with your heavily bruised jaw, sipping at the cool liquid. Suddenly a sound met your ears. Old floorboards overhead creaked with heavy footsteps. “Oh goddammit.” Cloth was shoved into your mouth once more, immediately drying your tongue. “H-Hold on. Stray here..” You glared at the clerk. Where the hell were you gonna go all tied up like this? The sweaty man dabbed his forehead with a handkerchief, opening the door that divided you from the outside world. “Hello?” A voice called out, rushing the clerk who felt so overwhelmed and frenzied with stress that he accidentally left the door open. “I’ll be right with you.” Staying coherent is a struggle for you at this point. Listening to light footsteps run up the stairs you let your head hang limp against your shoulder. “What can I help you with?” “Just here to resupply. Do you happen to have… uh… a bushel of corn?” “Corn? Yeah, we got it.” Wait… was that? CHARLES! Energy rocketed through your veins with the hope of rescue. Charles was here! Gazing around frantically you searched for something, ANYTHING. The only thing close by was a broom. Hopping your chair over to it depleted you immediately, every bruise and broken rib screaming out. But you had to do this. You had to get Charles’ attention. It was so much work just to get close enough to tip the broom over. CLINK! Your head snapped towards the stairs with anticipation. Charles read the list over again. “Actually a bushel of apples too.” CLINK! He glanced down at the stairs then at the clerk who laughed nervously. “Haha don’t mind that. Just some junk.” Charles hummed, grabbing a few cans off the shelf. “I’ll take these as well.” “Is that all for you?” Your heart squeezed in your chest. It didn’t work. ‘Charles! Charles I’m right here!’ You so badly wanted to scream. No words left your muffled mouth beyond your hearing. There had to be a way to get his attention. Nothing else was close enough to you and you didn’t have the strength to move yourself and the chair any further. The only thing you could do was throw yourself to the ground as hard as you could and hope for the best. BANG! This time Charles froze. His eyes napped towards the basement then back at the grocer.  A terrified look flashed over the man’s face. That’s suspicious... Oh- “Just some junk, huh?” “Yes sir.” In once swift movement Charles pulled out his gun, cocking the hammer. “Then you wouldn’t mind showing me what’s down there, right?” “H-Hey listen! I don’t want any trouble.” “No trouble here. If there’s nothing down there then I’ll pay and leave.” “It’s just junk mister! Honest!” “Then it should be okay if I take a look at this ‘junk’.” The clerk folded under pressure. “They said they were gonna kill me if anyone found out!” “Then get out of here and hope they don’t find you.” Charles didn’t know who ‘they’ were but he had a pretty good idea about what was going on.  He watched as the grocer fled before cautiously making his way down the stairs, cattleman revolver still drawn. Charles was stunned. All breath left his body in disbelief the second you two made eye-contact. “Y/N!” He hurdled himself towards you, picking the chair up to sit you upright before removing the gag. “What did they do to you?” Swift work was made of your binds and soon you were pulled into the comfort of his chest. Giving a whimper of pain you couldn’t help but to cry tears of relief. “Charles!” Your voice cracked. You almost thought it wouldn’t work and he would leave without you. Charles rubbed your back, pulling away to assess your injuries. “Y/N…… I-.” He didn’t know what to say.  So many emotions hit him in waves, washing over him strongly which inevitably flashed across his face. Anger at the people who hurt his beloved. Guilt for not tracking you any further. Resentment towards himself for not considering you might be missing or in trouble. Sadness. So much sadness. He had never seen you this badly beaten and it disturbed him. Quickly he tried to hide his thoughts. You were so small and frail in his arms, crying uncontrollably now. Charles could imagine by your current state that it must have been a horrible ordeal. “I’ve got you. Can you walk?” All you could do was cling to Charles while shaking your head. You felt the weight of his coat drape around your shoulder before feeling yourself being scooped up. “You found me.” Charles winced at how weak your voice sounded. Placing a gentle kiss on your forehead he shushes you. “Save your energy my love. You’ve been through a lot. Let me take care of you.” It’s the least he can do after failing you so badly. As he carried you up the stairs Charles make eye-contact with Sheriff Malloy who bowed his head slightly out of respect – serving as a silent apology. “We’ll hang whoever did this.” He promised.  Deputies flooded the store actively as he spoke. "When we find ‘em, you’ll be the first to know.” “Thank you.” Those words meant nothing to Charles. The Valentine law was useless and it showed. All he could do now was shield you from curious onlookers while mounting Taima with you securely in his arms. “Are you in any pain?” He whispered, making his horse walk so the ride wouldn’t jostle you too much. “Yeah.” Charles had to lean down to catch your quiet words. “Try to rest against me. I’ll get some morphine from the Reverend. Just hang in there. I’m sorry, I know it hurts.” He was trying desperately to find the right words to say. Anything that might help you or ease your suffering. Anything that might relieve his guilt. Grasping at words floating around his mind yet none could be combined into something coherent. They rode on in silence. “Mister Strauss, Reverend. We need medicine.” Most of the gang couldn’t see what was going on, Charles had you tucked protectively against him for privacy. He knew you probably didn’t want everyone ogling at you. The air of the situation was enough for everyone to gain understanding and many sprang into action. “How bad is it?” Strauss asked. “I think their ribs are broken, maybe sprained jaw. Definitely a sprained ankle.” “Bring Y/N over here.” Arthur called, leading Charles to his cot. “Probably better than the ground. Shouldn’t be movin’ much with cracked ribs.” Your eyes fluttered open the second you were placed in the comfort of Arthur’s bed. Charles immediately helped you take medicine to ease your suffering. “Do you need anything my love?” His voice was gentle as if speaking to a spooked animal. Large calloused fingers brushed the hair from your face. “Food… Water…” Arthur gently squeezed Charles’ shoulder, earning a grateful look from his friend. “Let me.” Your love settled into a chair beside you, still playing with locks of your hair. “You’re so brave Y/N. And so incredibly smart. I’m so happy you’re safe now. I-… I’ll never let this happen to you again.” He watched you struggle to stay conscious. Maybe the food will have to wait. Slumping forward, he places a feather light kiss upon your lips. “I’m coming with you everywhere for now on.” He knew you couldn’t hear him but it eased his soul just saying those words out loud.

[lacontroller1991]

Come Back To You (Danny Walker x F!Reader)

Main Master List || Misc Master List

Link to AO3

Summary: Danny lives, but now he has to make some choices.

Warnings: 18+ Near Character Death, Language, Period Accurate Diction, Semi-Graphic description of injuries, Evelyn isn't pregnant but still has her heart set on Rafe and Danny and Danny has his heart set on her and reader

Author's Note: I had to guys, I just had to and I'm honestly thinking about doing a whole ass multi chapter story revolving around the movie. It's an itch in my brain and it's not getting out. Again... Darn you Josh Hartnett

Word Count: 1.9k

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The sun is bright in the blue sky by the time the plane lands on the asphalt and comes to a stop. You feel your breath hitch in your throat as your heart pounds. It’s been months since you’ve seen Danny and you feel like you haven’t been able to breathe normally since. Evelyn moves from beside you, nails shortened by her nervous biting. What’s going to happen now that Rafe and Danny are back? If they are back? Did Danny change his mind after he’s been away and wants Evelyn or is he still keeping his word and coming back to you? 

“I feel like I’m going to faint,” her words are hushed as she tries to poke her head through the crowd of people and you try not to make a snarky comment. You and her were best friends, practically sisters, but she had broken your trust in a way you never thought she would. Since then, your relationship with the nurse has never been the same. 

“Don’t be dramatic.” Despite your harsh words and harsh exterior, inside you are panicking. What if he died? Then what? What if he chooses her? 

“I love him, you know? I love both of them so much.” If there was one thing you loved about Evelyn it’s that she’s a romantic like you, but not as much when she’s talking about the person who you’ve dreamt about for months on end. 

“I love him too. More than you can know.” You grab her hand and lead her through the group of people toward the front as the door to the plane drops open. Doolittle comes out first and you watch as his wife rushes towards him, gripping onto him as others slowly start to trickle out. Most you’ve met before, Gooz, Red, Earl, Rafe. Rafe. At the sight of him, Evelyn bolts forward, running straight into his arms and your heart beats a little faster. Maybe it’s the sun beating down on you or maybe it’s the fact that you have yet to see his face, but you feel sick to your stomach. 

Slowly walking towards the plane, you wait in high hopes as the remaining men come out, but still no Danny. Your heart sinks. Oh Danny, you stupid boy. Tears begin to swell in your eyes as your brain jumps to the worst possible situation. Evelyn takes note too, her hand reaching up to her mouth to hold back sobs, gaining Rafe’s attention. Noticing that Danny is nowhere to be seen, Rafe gently removes Evelyn from his arms and makes his way back to the plane. “Danny get your ass out here.”

“Boy s-s-sure knows how to make an entrance,” Red mutters, walking towards the group of people with a solemn look on his face, wishing Betty was amongst the crowd. 

A boot steps onto the stairs from the shadow and into the light, causing your heart to drop for the second time. “Danny,” you whisper softly, wiping the tears from your eyes as you rush past the group and up the stairs of the plane, grabbing onto him and pushing him back into the shadow causing him to let out a groan of pain. “I thought I lost you.”

Danny lets out a choked sob as he wraps one arm around you and buries his face in your hair, inhaling your scent. God he’s missed you. You’re the only thing he could think about for those months. The way your skin lights up in the sun. The way your eyes twinkle from the lights. The way the wind moves your hair. Everything about you is what kept him going, even when he crashed. “You can’t get rid of me that easily,” he chuckles as you pull away, looking over him as realization crashes over you. 

“Oh my God, what happened? We need to get you to a hospital,” you wince as you look over the extent of his injuries. His arm is in a sling, his leg has a long metal brace on it, and he has a big bandage over his neck.

“Wasn’t one of my better landings. The Chinese took good care of me and got me to this point,” he takes a step forward, pulling you back into him as he bumps his nose against yours. “They got me back to you.” He places a feather soft kiss to your lips before pulling back. “You’re as beautiful as the day I left you.” 

“Don’t ever leave me again,” you comment, taking his good side and hoisting his arm over your shoulders, helping him down the stairs as people cheer.

“I don’t plan on it.”

“Danny!” Evelyn rushes to his other side, being careful to avoid hurting him further and a lump forms in your throat. The moment you and him just shared was intimate, loving. There should be no confusion about who he chose, but still, there’s always that probability. 

“Evelyn. It’s good to see you,” he wears a smile on his face but he knows that the only woman he’ll ever love is the one on his good side.

“Yeah,” she pushes a piece of hair behind her ear, “you too.”

“Alright, let’s get Danny some proper treatment. Those Chinese nurses did a temp job, but he needs some actual medical care.” Rafe steps in, aware of your thankful gaze before the four of you walk off and get some medical help.

-----------

The hospital room is warm with a slight breeze coming in from the window as Danny lays on the bed, arm and leg in a proper cast. The tension in the room is visibly thick with you and Evelyn sitting on either side of Rafe, no one dares talking as the doctor and nurses work to make Danny comfortable. 

Turning to the three of you, the doctor gestures for all to step out of the room before eyeing you and Evelyn in confusion. “Which one of you is the wife?” 

“Neither of them are, sir. Whatever you need to say, you can say to all three of us,” Rafe comments as the doctor shrugs his shoulders in response.

“Captain Walker’s injuries were very severe. The doctors overseas did a good job of stitching his neck, but with the extent of his injuries to his arm and leg, he will have to be under watch for several months with several more months of physical training. We speculate that he will never be medically cleared to fly again.” Rafe’s head hangs in pity for Danny, but you see the look of relief that comes across Evelyn’s features and you feel the same way. “It was an act of God that he survived how he did. He should feel very blessed, but the pain is going to be tough. We will monitor it and give pain medicine as needed, but there is only so much we can do.”

“We understand,” you chime in, fingers picking at your cuticles. “Thank you Doctor.” He nods before walking away, leaving the three of you in the hall. “Now what?”

“We gotta be there for him. He’s not going to take this news well.” Evelyn nods along with Rafe’s words as a nurse steps out of the room and faces them.

“Is one of you Evelyn?” Evelyn’s eyes widen as she nods her head, stepping forward.

“Yes, that’s me.”

“He’s asked to speak with you.” The nurse holds open the door for Evelyn to go inside and sit down at his side, taking his hand. You can’t deny the feeling of hurt that encompasses you and Rafe notices. Taking your hand in his, he gives you a series of light squeezes 

“He loves you. Don’t worry.”

“How do you know he won’t choose her?” The question is genuine and Rafe looks to you with exasperation. 

“All he talked about was coming back home to you. Even in the thick of it, when we were surrounded by Japs, he kept praying to whoever to let him come home to you. I don’t think he once mentioned her.” Rafe gestures to where Danny lays and Evelyn sits, crying into her hands. “Believe me, he fucked up big time kissing my girl when he was going steady with you, but you’re the one he wants. The one he’s always wanted.” You let out a sigh of relief, giving his hand a reaffirming squeeze before letting go and letting your heart slowly mend. It’s true that Danny did kiss Evelyn while the two of you were seeing each other, but he had assured you that it was a one time deal and it would never happen again as long as he lives. She, on the other hand, made him her everything. 

Evelyn storms out of the room and faces you, tears rolling down her face. “If you ever hurt him…” It’s an empty threat and you know it. Evelyn couldn’t harm a fly, much less one of her former closest friends. Seeking solace in Rafe, she buries her head into his chest as he wraps his arms around her, still not sure what to make of the entire situation. Taking that as a cue, you walk into the room, closing the door behind you and making your way to his bedside. 

“Hey there,” his voice is raspy and you instinctively reach for the cup of water, bringing the straw to his lips for him to drink.

“Hey to you too. The doctor said you’ll be here for some months. Said your injuries were more severe than you let on.” He nods his head, pushing away the water and laying his brown eyes on yours. 

“Did they say if I can fly again?” Hanging your head, you reach for his hand and grasp it into yours. 

“I’m sorry honey, but probably not. The army won’t clear you after something like this. They said it’s a miracle you’re even alive.” Danny smirks and internally feels relief. Yes, he wants to continue and work for the war effort, but he also just wants to leave the world behind and move to a small house with you to live out a domesticated life. 

“You’re the only thing that kept me going. When I was out there,” he pauses, looking away and trying to bat the tears away. He does not want to look weak, not when he’s already looking weak as is. “When I was out there, I thought I was going to die. I was bleeding profusely, losing consciousness by the second and the only thing I could think of was you. You’re my world, (Y/N), and I couldn’t bear the thought of leaving you the way I thought Rafe left me. And I’m sorry that I kissed Evelyn. We were both mourning and needing comfort and she was the only one that could understand, not that it doesn’t excuse it. But I love you and I will make it up to you for the rest of my life if I have to.”

Your heart is hammering in your chest and butterflies erupt in your stomach. He chose me. It’s me who he wants. “Danny, what are you trying to say?” 

Mustering the strength, Danny brings your hand up to his lips, kissing your soft knuckles. “What I'm trying to say is, will you marry me?” 

“Oh Danny!” You surge forward, pressing your lips against his as tears roll down your cheeks. Breaking away from the kiss, you rest your forehead against his, his breath and your breath mingling together. “Yes, a thousand times, yes!” 

“Yes?”

“Yes!” Your lips connect with his again and for the first time in a while, you feel that everything is just right. 

people who had an interest: @phoenixhalliwell @waywardtigersandwich

[yuumcbr]

What are your favorite Twisted Wonderland AUs?

Like every fandom, Twisted Wonderland has countless AUs. Among them, there are some that I really like.

The purpose of this post is to share my favorite AUs and hopefully get to know others through other people. Under no circumstances do I want to cause conflict or confusion.

To begin with, I really like universes where the protagonist of the story is a secondary character in the story who is trying not to get involved or live an everyday life.I found most of these stories on AO3, such as:

In this fic, a boy from our world goes to the body of a boy from Octavinelle who committed suicide. Now he tries to adapt to his new routine at a magic school, without attracting attention (he attracts a lot of attention).

In this one, the protagonist is reincarnated as a rabbit-beastman and grows up in a watch shop. Bunny's (the protagonist's nickname) goal is to create a way to return to his world.

As time goes by, he enters RSA, but is expelled and enrolls in NRC.

Here we are introduced to a boy who had a sister who was in love with an Otome game called Twisted Wonderland. One day, he wakes up as Raphael, a boy who picked on Yuu (the protagonist of the game, not the story).But something happens, he is able to see the level of love the character has for Yuu.

Another type of AU that I love are the universes that take place in the modern world, that is, ours. And Yuu gradually gets to know other characters.

Some examples of this AU are:

In this AU, Yuu is a wizard who can see demons and works with a charlatan medium (Fellow).

Little by little, Yuu meets countless demons who want to make a contract with him and take his soul.

This one, Yuu works in a shop in Donetsk and his customers are, well, different...

Yuu is gradually introduced to the magical world of magical girls (who are actually the boys of TWST), apparently people can't see certain things around them, but Yuu discovers that he is an exception.

And this draws a lot of attention.

Here is a world of heroes and villains, Yuu is a student who adopted a cat/tanuki monster who wants to be the greatest villain of all.

Yuu's city is divided into factions, and sometimes he works at Mr. S's shop which is located in a neutral zone.

Little by little, Yuu and Grim find themselves indirectly meeting and forming bonds with people they shouldn't.

The next AU is a crossover created by two people, this AU takes place after everyone graduates from NRC, Yuu is studying at a History college and his friends got their own jobs.

But there's more to it than meets the eye, TWST x SAW Au.

As I said before, the AU was created by two people. While @kimium shows Yuu's view of their friends and everyday life at History college, @m34gs shows the characters planning murders and their past where they were trapped in someone's plan.

You can find more information on their tumblrs.

Next up is the Seven Great AU by @amarizuu , in this universe, Yuu can talk to the 7 Greats in his head.

This makes interactions with other characters very interesting, since Yuu listens to them 24 hours a day. They give opinions and discuss in Yuu's head.

Yuu went through a lot before going to NRC, being manipulated and treated like a weapon, at least now he can be treated like a normal teenager (as much as possible, since we're talking about NRC students).

Another AU that I love a lot is Deity AU or God AU, on Tumblr it was created by @ceruleancattail and on AO3 you can find the series of "twisted_wonderland_shenanigans" with this link:

I really like this AU, to summarize, the characters of TWST are gods that interact with the human world or a specific human.

You can also find other stories of this AU on Tumblr.

Now Android AU, this AU is by @ceruleancattail .Yuu is a mechanic who has always loved taking things apart and putting them back together. His curiosity about how things work has made him a great professional.

In the AU, Yuu fixes robots (who would be the characters) and treats them like any other person, not just as machines.

This makes the androids not want to go back to their owners who treat them like machines and stay with Yuu forever.

There is a touch of Yandere in the stories, but nothing too strong or explicit.

The stories in the AU vary a lot, but they are all really cool.

You can also find some stories from this AU on tumblr.

I think I mentioned most of them, I can't remember exactly which ones.

But now comes the fun part, which TWST AUs do you like the most?

This isn't a rhetorical question, I would really like to know more AUs and it's always fun to interact with other people in the fandom.

Ps: If you own one of the AUs and stories above and would like something removed or added, please let me know.

And if you didn't like me tagging you, let me know too.

[mrsbarnesblog]

sandcastles

masterlist ko-fi ao3

CEO! Husband! Bucky Barnes x Wife! Reader

Summary: Bucky is always working overtime, but when his best girls really need him, he leaves everything behind just to make you happy.

Words count: 1.6k

Warnings: modern setting, CEO Bucky, they have a daughter, fluff, real love

Author’s note: this one was inspired by Sebastian’s appearance in Paris. he really gave me a heart attack with that look❤️‍🔥

Bucky Barnes was a busy man. Running a multi-million-dollar company wasn’t the easiest thing, but something that he cared more about than this job was his family. His beautiful wife and daughter.

You always loved and appreciated the attention, support, and endless love that your husband gave, even when you just started dating eight years ago. As soon as you met, it took some time for both of you to finally admit your feelings, but when you got together, it was perfect. You’ve never felt that way in your life before. When you were younger, everyone told you that you wouldn’t be able to find a person because of your high standards, but when you started dating James Buchanan Barnes, you knew that it was forever.

A beautiful, respectful, and caring man who would do anything for you.

For the past two months, he has been more distant. His company was getting bigger; he had too many meetings, and too many new things required his whole attention. You understood it; of course you did. But you would be lying if you said that you didn’t miss him. Your daughter felt it too. She was totally daddy’s girl, so being away from him for too long upset her, even though she was trying to be tough and careless, just like her dad when he was working.

You talked to her about her dad’s work, and she was a smart girl for a 3-year-old. She understood that he has a lot to do right now and that he still loves her more than anything in this world.

Today he returned home only after 2 am., you heard that he went to take a shower in a different room, probably not to wake you up. But you were too eager to spend as much time with him as possible, even if it was when he was falling asleep.

Bucky came into the room quietly. As soon as he got under the blanket, his warm and strong arms wrapped around you. He pulled you closer to him, burying his nose into your neck.

"I’m sorry, doll. Again." He took a deep breath, enjoying your scent, which he missed so much. "I love you."

"That’s okay, baby." You moved even closer to him, burying your fingers into his wet hair, and left a kiss on his temple. "I love you too. Now take some rest."

You hadn't even started to fall asleep when you heard a weird noise outside your bedroom, and then the door slightly opened.

"Daddy? Mommy?" A little voice came through the silence of the room. "Are you asleep?" Your daughter suddenly sobbed, and you and Bucky immediately sat on the bed, reaching for the nightstand lamps.

"Hey, angel, what happened? Come here." Bucky’s voice was very soft and gentle, as always when he talked to your daughter. She came closer to the bed, and Bucky picked her up, putting her on his lap. She was tightly holding her favorite white wolf, which you gifted Bucky as a joke because of his nickname at work. Your daughter's eyes were a little bit red, her hair messy, and her cheeks wet with tears. You moved closer to them, gently rubbing her face.

"What’s going on? You saw a bad dream?" You quietly asked, but she just shook her head.

"I— I—" She was obviously too upset to put her words together, so Bucky started to rub her back, whispering a quiet "sh-h".

"I— miss you, daddy." As soon as these words left her mouth, you and Bucky froze, and she started crying even harder. "I don’t s-see you, and me and mom—mommy are always alone."

Bucky looked you in the eyes, and you saw that his own were full of tears. The last thing he wanted to do was upset either of you. He felt that his heart was ripping apart. You made your daughter cry, you idiot. Your wife deserves better.

You just put your hand on his shoulder and squeezed, already knowing where his mind went. He always wanted to give his family everything, and the fact that he put work above his two favorite people in the world made him sick.

"Angel, hey, baby, look at me." Bucky turned back to your daughter, grabbing her little face with his hands and gently wiping away her tears. "I promise that the day after tomorrow we will go somewhere. Only mommy, you, and me, okay?"

"But—but you’re working."

"I know, angel. But I didn't want to make you feel lonely or to stay away for too long from your mom." He grabbed your hand and brought it to his mouth to leave a kiss. "We will go wherever you want to. Maybe stay there for the week. You would like that?" He smiled at your daughter, and she happily giggled, wrapping herself around Bucky’s neck. "I love you. Both of you. You two are my whole life, and I'll do anything to make you happy."

You softly smiled at him, leaning in to leave a quick kiss on his lips.

Your daughter put away her white wolf and opened her other arm, wanting you to join her and Bucky in a hug.

That night she stayed in your bed because she almost passed out in Bucky’s arms but still held onto you both too tightly. The three of you happily curled under the blanket, with your daughter in between. Bucky knew that it was time for him to finally make the right decision. To choose his family.

As Bucky promised, one day later your little family was on a vacation where no one could disturb you. He left Steve, Sam, and Natasha, his closest and oldest friends, in charge of everything, canceled all the meetings, and took you and your daughter on the private jet that brought you here. One of the most beautiful places you’ve ever been.

It was quiet. No strangers, no annoying noise, no worries. Just the three of you on the beach with a perfect little house and warm, crystal-clear water.

You were wearing a light flowy dress, and Bucky, finally free from those annoying suits, chose trousers with a white tank top and shirt on top of it.

You two were sitting under the sunset on a blanket with food and a bottle of wine, while your daughter was playing near the water with sand. It was such an amazing evening; just everything was perfect, and as you were watching your smiling husband, you felt that you had fallen in love once again.

"You keep staring at me, doll, You ‘kay?" He finally turned his face to you, and you couldn't hold your wide smile, which he immediately returned.

"I’m okay. It’s just… everything is perfect here—the beach, the house, you two here." You covered your eyes with your hand because of the setting sun. "You know, you’ve been here for a couple of hours, but you look much better. Your skin is glowing, you’re happy, and, god, that hair bun looks really hot." Bucky’s smile grew wilder because of your words.

He grabbed you in bridal style and set you across his lap, wrapping his hands around your waist. You slightly screamed, not being ready for such movements, but then happily melted into your husband's touch.

"So you think that I look hot?" A cheesy grin crossed his face, and you playfully rolled your eyes.

"Do you think I would’ve married you if I thought otherwise, James?" You arched an eyebrow at him. Your hands found the perfect place under Bucky’s blue shirt by themselves. God, it's been too long since you spent good time together alone.

"What do you think about the idea that when we get home, we send our daughter to visit her amazing grandparents, so we could be completely alone for a couple of days?" He said it as if he was reading your mind, so you just silently nodded. "Doll, you’re too beautiful for this damn world; I can’t even understand how I was able to be far away from you for that long. I missed you so much, baby." Bucky’s hands slipped lower on your hips, while his lips were leaving sweet kisses on the side of your neck.

"Not here, Buck; we’re not alone, remember?" You nodded back at your daughter, who was honestly more interested in building sandcastles.

"Of course. Just wanted to say that I’m so sorry for my absence. I got so involved in work that I didn’t even notice that you too were hurt. I’ve never wanted to do that. I’m sorry. And I love you. So fucking much." Bucky connected your foreheads and put his right hand on your cheek.

"Don’t be sorry. I know that you want better for us and that you want to do everything right. It’s okay to make mistakes sometimes. You know, you are such a great dad because your daughter’s tears made you leave everything and spend time with us. And I’m forever thankful for this." You smiled, holding his stubbled face in your hands. "I love you, James."

You two connected with a kiss. It wasn’t too rough or desperate. It was just pure love and adoration for one another. Bucky was slowly moving his lips, feeling the need for your taste, your smell, and your touch. Your little bubble didn’t last too long, though, not after your daughter finally wanted your attention.

"Mommy! Daddy!" You pulled away from the kiss, looking back at your daughter, who was now all in the sand. "Do you want to help me build a castle?"

You looked at Bucky, who had the same smile on his face.

"Of course, angel. What do you need from us?"

[wasjustred]

ahhh iloveyourworkssomuch!! 💖 i'd like to request something along the lines of sugar mommy!larissa (maybe with smut, who knows *wink*) 'cause she's all i can think about these days... anyways, happy early new years!!!

Easy Does It - NSFW Larissa Weems x f!Reader

Summary: Larissa spoils you beyond comprehension. Pairing(s): Larissa Weems x f!Reader Warnings: Smut. A lot of it. (Cunnilingus, fingering, strap-on — all Reader receiving) Word Count: ~4.7k

Author’s Note: I hope this meets your expectations, anon! I originally intended to make Larissa way more domineering, but once I began writing it just didn’t feel like her——I tried to stay true to her character where I could. As always, feedback is welcome ﹠. appreciated! ♡ (un-beta-ed as per usual!) ╱ AO3

The arrangement you and Larissa have has been smoothly gliding along for about six months now: you meet for dinner every weekend, in a town about half an hour outside of Jericho. You wear an outfit she’s picked out for you, she pulls your seat out, you share conversation and good - expensive - food and drinks, and you end on the stoop of your apartment, leaning into the kiss she places on your cheek, with a weekly allowance in cash in your purse. It’s the perfect set-up, nothing you’d dare protest, but sometimes you honest to god wish she’d just break her own rules and rail you ‘till the bed breaks.

Tonight you meet her at The Aviary, draped in a black satin dress with a deep slit up the leg––one of her favorites. Larissa helps you into your seat as she usually does, but before she takes her own, she places a long velvet box on your empty appetizer plate.

“Ooh, what’s this?”

“Open it and see.” A small, proud smirk turns her lips, eyes sparkling. You run your fingers over the velvet and lift at the seam, features going slack with surprise when you realize what’s hidden inside: a collar necklace, glittering diamond-cut, softening into a single falling arc of gems which ebbs, finally, into a small, shining teardrop. Light from the restaurant’s fixtures seem drawn to it, gleaming to and fro in a scattered stream of reflection. Your gaze snaps back to hers almost immediately, heart pounding.

“Larissa, I–”

“Do you like it?”

“I– Of course I do, it’s– it’s so beautiful..” Your voice softens and tapers off as you return your attention to the box before you. It’s probably the most beautiful thing anyone’s ever given to you, but you stop short of admitting this. “Help me put it on?” 

Larissa’s smile grows as she gathers the box in her hands, lifting the necklace from its cushion. She moves to stand behind you and tenderly brushes your hair aside; her hands are as soft as anything, so gentle in the way they handle you, securing the piece around your neck. Your own hand raises to rest atop the new weight at your clavicle, and when she sets her palms along your shoulders and squeezes, you shift your hand up to capture hers.

“What’s the occasion?”

“Do I need one?” Larissa presses her lips to your cheek from behind before she retakes her seat, arching a brow in challenge. The answer is no, of course; this is how you work, special occasion or not. She always manages to keep you on your toes, though, far more thoughtful and intimate than any other ‘financeur’ you’ve ever humored in the past: Tennis bracelets set with gemstones which perfectly match your eyes, a new coffee bar set-up when you mentioned off-hand that Starbucks had discontinued your favorite drink, a signed first edition copy of your favorite book she ‘just so happened to come across’ while out of state. Much more than the simple, routine bank deposits and luxury brand pieces that were never quite you which you received from others. Larissa’s gifts have always been astoundingly personal.

You’ve never told her this, but you stopped dating altogether once your little dynamic began. How could anyone else compare? She makes you feel important without ever having to work for it ––– like you’re lovable, worthy, because you exist, and nothing more. You’re breaking  your own rules, being so enamored with her, but you refuse to dwell on it.

“No, you don’t…” You trail off as your food arrives, ducking your head in thanks as the waiter sets everything out before you. Any discussion of her gift to you ends there on Larissa’s own accord, swiftly and advantageously moving on to a new topic as soon as the waiter has left you. The rest of the night is spent sipping expensive wine and musing instead on all of the high-culture goings-on you never get to discuss with anyone else: Art, ballet, classical music. Larissa’s a delicious trove of knowledge and opinions and she impresses you with each turn of a new topic. You often find yourself wondering - not just tonight, but many nights whilst basking in her presence - why she’s chosen you. You can hold good conversation, of course, and have an appreciation for the finer things in life usually reserved for those older and/or wealthier than you, but what’s always been curious, what’s always given you pause, is that she never asks for anything else in return. You have no choice but to ask yourself what it is you possibly have to offer to a woman like her––but you almost always fall short of a satisfying answer.

She’s talking you both through an analysis of the most recent play she brought you to when you take one of her hands in your own, tracing the lines of her palm as you listen. Larissa stumbles over her words at first contact, a rare occurrence for her, and blushes pink at the sensation. When you glance up at her in question she quickly averts her gaze and carries on, moving to smooth her thumb over yours as you continue. You love her fingers: they’re long, delicate, awfully reminiscent of the Greek statues she enjoys waxing poetic about. It’s an instance in which you’re reminded art, very often, echoes us in a continuous cycle of give and take.

You don’t say a word when you notice her face darken another shade as you press a kiss to the inside of her wrist before moving on to dote upon her other hand.

She’s not once explicitly told you, but Larissa’s never expected you to take a physical liking to her. She set the rules she did early on for a reason, knowing she could live with looking and not touching, taking care of you and watching your face turn alight with each gift or special night out without ever ending the evening by your side. No sex necessary, no physical affection expected. But here you are, fawning over her, and she’s never been more conflicted.

To assuage the feeling, she convinces herself it’s the wine that’s made you this way––a good bottle will go a long way, thus your touch must be the product of inebriation, not genuine affection. You’ve both long since finished off your meals when Larissa pays the bill and drives you home as she normally does, to an apartment she partly finances (not fully, at your own insistence that there are some things you should take care of yourself) and walks you to your door, stooping to kiss your cheek. Routine. 

She is right about one thing, however, and that’s the potency of the house wine tonight. Not on your reasoning, but your self-control. You spent the car ride home admiring her profile in the passing streetlamps and traffic lights, studying the way each red light cast itself across her, how the passing headlights of opposing traffic bathed her in a cinematic glow you associated only, appropriately, with Vivien Leigh in A Streetcar Named Desire. Ghostlike, almost. Ethereal. And at that same wine’s behest, you lean further now into her goodnight kiss than you’d normally allow yourself.

It’s as she prepares to leave that you decide - anchored by the weight of the diamonds around your neck - that this is the night you’ll throw caution to the wind, fervently hoping it won’t backfire and end with her rejection and a ruined arrangement that you’d both worked to preserve over the past six months.

“Do you want to join me for a nightcap? I know we don’t usually, but.. I’d like you to. If you’d like to, of course. If you don’t that’s–––”

“Y/N,” she interrupts. You can hardly tell but her heart’s just about burst out of her chest. There’s an inner battle waging right on the precipice of her ribcage and your bright, hopeful eyes staring up at her aren’t making it any easier to parse out. Do you feel obligated somehow to pay her back for the necklace? She knows you know she’d never ask that of you, that your arrangement is not a traditional one, but has she unknowingly pushed the bounds all the same? Did you simply imbibe too much and don’t really have a clue what it is you’re saying?

Or, perhaps.. Most dangerously: Do you mean it?

“I don’t want you to feel as though you have to… ‘pay me back’ for tonight. That was never my intention.”

She volleys her own inner turmoil dead straight in your direction and stares down at you with what might be, if you squint hard enough, a nervous expression.

You lean sideways against the door and cross your arms over yourself, appraising her. Does she really not want you? What the hell does she get out of this if she doesn’t? You just can’t wrap your head around it, and while you insisted to yourself you’d never outwardly question the bounds of your relationship and why they’ve settled where they are, you’ve put yourself at a crossroads.

“Do you think I’m pretty?”

She balks.

“What? Of course I do. What does that have to do with anything?” Larissa’s expression is a mixture of incredulity and apprehension. You decide to bite the bullet then as she lingers uncertainly beneath the moonlight.

“I don’t understand what you get out of this. Am I not–– you think I’m pretty but you don’t want to touch me? You pay for my livelihood but you don’t want anything tangible in return?” You both purse your lips simultaneously and you’d laugh if the situation weren’t so dire all of a sudden. “You confuse me, Larissa.”

She shifts her weight from one foot to the other, a small cloud bursting forth as she sighs.

You fucked it, didn’t you? Fucked it right to hell, and now she’s never going to speak to you again.

“You’re an idiot, do you know that?” The air goes still.

…

It’s news to you. 

Larissa suddenly pushes forward and traps you against the front of your door, hands leveled at your waist. “I’ve always wanted you,” she grits out, her arms tensing at your sides. “I just didn’t want you to feel as though you had to. Return the sentiment, that is. You’re too precious for that.” Her voice is low and rough in your ear, strangled. You grab hold of her forearms to keep yourself upright when her tone shoots right through you, breathing heavily. You gradually lift your gaze, poring over every curve of hers as you do, and meet her eyes. They’ve nearly gone black with lust, and a subtle quiver in her lip tells you everything you need to know.

“Kiss me.”

Larissa groans, which is admittedly not the reaction you’d expected, and presses further into you, her nose brushing against your cheek.  You can feel the heat of her grow, ensnaring you in perfect contrast to the cool night air.

“You have to tell me you want it, darling. I need you to say it.” … Oh. A new wave of arousal surges through you as you turn your head ever so slightly, her lips hovering just out of reach. The shared breath between you has become fraught with possibility, with the overwhelming, unspent energy that’s been collecting over the last six months without either of you quite noticing. Of course this is what she needs: confirmation, not that you’re hers but that she’s yours, by choice and choice alone.

“I want you, Larissa. Please,” you whisper, squeezing her arms in an attempt to ground yourself. She says nothing in return, instead immediately closing the distance and engulfing you in a desperate, searing kiss. Your cheeks burn and it’s all you can do not to melt into her fully, sucking in a sharp breath as her tongue slides against your bottom lip. This, this, you realize, is exactly what you’d imagined: Feeling her against you, wrapped up tightly in her arms, being drawn in and freed all at once, struggling to contain the desire you feel pulsing within yourself. It’s like Larissa’s split open your mind and picked through every thought there, coming away with only the most indecent imaginings and putting them to use as her hips pitch forward and her hands grasp achingly at the roundness of your thighs.

“Open the door,” she husks, suddenly ripping herself away and turning you at the waist to face the door. You fumble for your keys as she scores your neck and shoulders with hot, open-mouth kisses, running the tip of her tongue along the muscle that pulls taut there.

“F-fuck.” The chuckle she gives in response to your whimpering, shaking when you can’t fit the key into its slot, only weakens you further. Larissa must know her effect well as she wraps an arm around you to hold you upright, the other grabbing the key from you and swiftly unlocking the door in one go.

“Trust me, I’m trying.”

Laughter follows you both as you take the stairs one at a time, pausing every few to take her tongue in your mouth and run your hands along her front. You bypass the living room once you reach the landing - a feat in itself - and lead Larissa straight to your bedroom, kicking one heel off in the hall and the other at the threshold of your room. 

She stops you just before you reach the bed and holds you steady for a moment: “Hold on, I want to look at you..” You hair is mussed, curls losing their hold in the heat of your entanglement, chest heaving and red. Larissa steps forward to brush her thumb over your lips, searching your face for any sign of hesitation or doubt.

She doesn’t find any.

“Christ, you’re a pretty thing,” she hums. The pad of her thumb pulls at your bottom lip and you acquiesce, tilting your chin up before taking her finger into your mouth, rolling your tongue against its tip, watching her with wide eyes that imply an innocence you don’t possess. A hiss escapes her when your teeth come down around her knuckle and she scowls, gripping your jaw with an intensity that rivets the surrounding atmosphere as she rips her hand away, smashing your lips together once more.

In the next second the backs of your knees are buckling against the edge of the mattress and you squeak; Larissa had slipped a hand over your sternum and shoved, launching you down hard into the bed. Wet heat urges your hips forward as she crawls over you, but her hands swiftly come down to force them back into the mattress, trapping you there.

“Patience, darling.” You scoff as she begins the journey down your body, placing lazy kisses to your lips, cheek, jaw, chest while her fingers deftly work to pull your dress from you. You lift your back so she can snake a hand around and drag the zipper down to its end at the top of your hips, wriggling free and moving to pull at her own dress–––but she grabs your wrists, pinning them above you with a devious smirk. 

“Ah, ah. Let me spoil you,” she murmurs into the crook of your neck, one hand traveling to cup the dampness between your legs. Electricity cracks against your spine at her touch; you’re sweltering and freezing all at once, watching her eyes rake over you with a hunger you’ve never seen on her before. Her fingers draw idle circles around your clit as she works her way down your body, leaving a trail of wetness in her wake where tongue meets flesh, nipping at the precipice of your hip bones, glancing up at you before she licks you through your panties. There’s no helping the whine you turn free when she all but purrs at the taste she gets of you from the soaked fabric.

“Larissa, please,” you huff, lifting your hips up to meet her mouth. She takes three steps then in quick succession: chuckles into the skin of your inner thigh; pulls your panties down and off of you; and presses a series of messy, teasing kisses to your bare sex. Your fingers clutch at the top of your duvet as she finally begins to devour you, breath hitching as her tongue circles your entrance and delves into you. In a moment of white hot desperation, you hook your legs around her, calves flexing against her back as you shudder into her touch. She’s ravenous, consuming you with long, uninterrupted strokes that ride on the flat of her tongue, lapping your slickness up and winding into you all at once. The coil is tight within you already, pulsing with every movement of her mouth. You’re almost worried it’ll be over before it scarcely has had the chance to start, but a quiet, bemused voice in the back of your mind ridicules you: Larissa is nothing if not generous.

“You taste divine,” she breathes, before returning her ministrations to your clit, sucking and popping with the filthiest fucking moan you’ve ever heard. The feeling of her tongue against that tight bundle of nerves prompts your eyes to roll back, eyelids fluttering, and imbues your hands with a mind of their own, working them swiftly into her hair and pulling her as close to your cunt as you can get her, hips lurching in an unsteady rhythm. You can feel her amusement at your desperation as distinctly as you feel her mouth, but it’s quickly forgotten when she slides two fingers into you with an ease that makes you lightheaded. The sound of your wetness is sinful, and you have to admit it only spurs you on.

“Fuck me, fuck me, pleasefuckme––” Larissa’s grinning against you as she pumps her fingers, curling into you with a startling accuracy that leaves you breathless and aching. You press your cheek to your shoulder in a feeble attempt to keep yourself above the threshold dividing pleasure and bliss, useless as she slips another finger into you and flicks her tongue against you, quickening her pace as she follows the mounting tone of your pleas. Every touch spreads a warmth through you impossible to ignore, stirring a frantic need beneath the surface of your skin.

“Cum for me, darling, cum for me, that’s right.” Larissa presses the heel of her hand into the space just below the swell of your stomach and the coil snaps suddenly, sharply, sucking all of the air out of you at the same time that you yelp and tense with equal force, clamping around her face as your orgasm tears through you. She continues to lap at you even as your hands push at her, holding fast to your thighs to keep her place. Your legs shake as she builds you up in the same breath that you’re coming down, a second orgasm already rearing its head.

“I can’t,” you keen, but Larissa shakes her head and unlatches briefly to disagree.

“Yes you can, Y/N––be a good girl for me.” It washes over you when she lowers her face again and wraps her lips around your clit, sucking with an unfazed firmness that shocks you to your center. You’re tingling over every limb, pacing your breaths to ride you through this second crest. “That’s it..” Larissa coos, running her hand over your leg comfortingly. You can hardly breathe as the shockwaves roll through you one after the other, and the darkness of the ceiling above you seems to double in size as you stare in a daze.

Your muscles melt into the mattress one by one, sinking deep as Larissa finally pulls her head away and crawls forward to kiss you; you can taste your slickness on her tongue, familiar and tangy. When you part, gasping for air, you wrap a hand around the back of her neck and press your foreheads together, gazing up into her eyes with the softest look you can muster after so thoroughly falling apart in her hands.

“My turn?” She laughs loud and heartily at your doe-eyed demeanor. You’re itching to touch her, to taste her, and she knows it.

“Mmm, maybe.” Larissa shrugs and rises up from her position over you, sliding off to the side of the bed where you can’t reach her––and not for lack of trying. A whine catches in your throat when she shoots a withering look over her shoulder, patting the space beside her. “Help me with my dress, darling.”

You waste no time in flipping over onto your knees, shuffling over to her and grappling with the zipper of her dress. You flush when she laughs both at your inability to get it down in one swift motion and the frustrated little growl that bubbles up from your chest.

“Not funny,” you complain, gritting your teeth as she shifts and the zipper gives, revealing the smooth, snowy expanse of her back. Instilled with a renewed sense of hunger, you push the fabric away from both of her shoulders and continue the journey down and around to her breasts, thrilled she’s forgone a bra tonight as you palm the supple flesh there and roll her nipples between your fingers. The sigh she expels is a ragged one, her hands dwarfing yours whilst her head falls back against your shoulder. You revel in the sight of her lip caught between her teeth.

“I want to fuck you.” You just barely catch it in between her labored breaths and your own thunderous heartbeat, but you do, and you turn to glance at her curiously before her meaning hits you square in the face.

“But––”

She cuts you off. “I want to destroy you, Y/N. You can taste me later,” Larissa mutters, pivoting without another warning and capturing your lips again. You wouldn’t complain if it weren’t for the utter distress you felt to get your hands on her. She doesn’t give you a chance to rebut, however, as she slips out of her dress and climbs over you, guiding your hands to grip her ass. “Later, I promise.” She pulls back to appraise you, taking a rigorous inventory that she’ll commit to memory if it’s the last thing she does: Your flushed skin, the way you can’t keep still under her touch, the unmistakable shine of desire in your eyes.

“In th-the nightstand,” you stammer. Suddenly the realization that Larissa is here, in your bed, and you, at her mercy, is too much at once. You’re trembling with need and anticipation. She tilts her head at you, one second, two passing before she follows your guidance and pulls the drawer open, grinning wickedly at what she finds there.

“Harness?”

You nod vigorously, propping yourself up on your elbows and directing her through another drawer of your dresser. The slow, methodical way in which she fastens the leather around herself surely burns itself into your brain, and you can’t help the shameless moan that seeps out when she smooths an indulgent layer of lubricant along the silicone from base to tip, a delicious sight between her legs.

Larissa approaches with an emphasized swing to her hips, bending at the waist to press a chaste kiss to your lips before she nudges you to scoot back into the middle of the bed, positioning herself above you with a hand on either side of your head. She dips her face down into the hollow of your throat. 

Her voice vibrates against you despite her hushed tone. “Are you ready for me, darling?”

Your brain short-circuits at her words, imperfect timing. God, she’s fucking hot.

She lifts her head again to catch your gaze and smirks, nibbling on the tip of your chin. “Use your words.”

“Yes, yes, I’m ready,” you rasp, drawing your nails down the broad expanse of her back in anticipation.

The moment she slides into you is pure ecstasy: your toes curl and you haphazardly clamber for purchase upon her skin as she buries herself deep within you, stalling for a few moments to give you time to adjust. The way Larissa groans into the motion draws out an amusing - filthy - rumination about her being able to feel every stroke as with her own body, delighting in your wetness. She fills you seamlessly, snapping her hips against you before slowly drawing herself back, only to repeat the pattern and plunge into you as deeply as she’s able. It’s bruising and pleasurable all at once, how she brushes up against your walls and the ridges of the toy hit what your mind insists is every nerve-ending within you.

You rock together desperately, bodies moving as one as if you’d been doing this for centuries, mapping each other out and bringing each other to your peak. You savor the novel, tangled scent of sweat and arousal, a newly formed association with the sound of Larissa’s broken whimpers now frozen in your psyche.

A startled breath leaves you as Larissa abruptly anchors her weight to one side and pulls you on top of her, flipping your positions. Her arms wrap tight around you, looped at your back and around your shoulder as she fucks up into you at a crushing pace. You whine into the crook of her neck and realize you’re on the verge of tears, an overwhelming wave of pleasure and desperation wracking your body. Quiet grunts accompany her each thrust, slowing just so until it’s a steady pattern you can count to like clockwork, brutal and sharp at every buck of her hips. Your knees are aching, folded as they are, but the tight, coiling sensation within you overrides any and all discomfort, merely a quiet nagging in your brain; your focus is settled precisely on the angle of her cock and how her nails dig into your skin as you grind against each other. She’s close, too. You can feel it. It’s there in the shallowness of her breaths, in the urgency of her pelvis against yours, in the subtle arch of her back. You try to meet her where she’s at in your muddled state, pitching your hips backwards and down when she thrusts upwards––and you know it’s worked when she gasps and her hands scramble to lock together at the small of your back.

“Yes, that’s it darling. Just like that,” Larissa pants, using the leverage of her hold on you to help you fuck yourself. The only sounds permeating the room are that of your mingled breaths and her cock driving into you with a consistent, almost unforgiving rhythm. 

“Pleasepleaseplease, ohfuck––” 

“Y/N–––”

She tenses with you and cries out as your orgasms hit you both at once, ravaging you beyond reason. You’re hyper-aware of the way her breasts feel pressed against you, the way one of her hands flies up to bury itself in your hair as you ride her through your climax. Larissa’s hips stutter as she whines into your shoulder, sinking her teeth into you, and you marvel at the feeling of her muscles clenching around you, from the sinewy stretch of her arms to her thighs rested between your own.

Everything you’d hoped for. Fantasized about. Greedily deliberated again and again whilst watching her across the table in another fancy restaurant in another unfamiliar town.

Larissa is careful as she pulls out of you, slow and deliberate so as not to disturb the tenderness there. You remain curled on top of her but she doesn’t complain, rather rubbing your back in long, languid movements and whispering affirmations in you ear, a sweet mixture of ‘breathe darling, I’ve got you’ and more headily, ‘you did so well for me, you’re so good, you took me so well’. When you allow yourself to fall to the side of her, she shimmies out of the harness and tosses it somewhere off the edge of the bed, ignoring its clatter as she wraps you up in her arms. You burrow yourself further into her warmth and sigh at the feeling, content.

“Now is it my turn?” you ask, voice low and raked over with exhaustion. The belly laugh she gives is worth all the weariness in the world. “You’re incorrigible!”

[stellar-solar-flare]

Hey, this is my first time sending you a request. I'm so glad that you're getting back in to writing.

Can I request Steve Rogers × reader based on Taylor Swift's Champagne problems but with happy ending please 💖 (I'm a sucker for happy endings)

Thank you for sending a prompt! I hope you like what I spun up. I'm definitely a sucker for happy endings, too, and I love Taylor Swift's music too, so this prompt was right up my alley.

Worthy - Steve Rogers/Reader

Mature - 18+ only!

You and Steve Rogers have been dating for a year. When a journalist is out to get you, you will have to stand together and come out stronger.

Romance, angst with a happy ending, fluff & hurt/comfort, protective Steve Rogers.

Word Count: 2,045 words.

Warnings: Press being nasty. Reader has unspecified past trauma and unspecified mental health issues as a result. Self-esteem and self-worth issues. Sexual content (not very explicit).

Alternate Universe: The Avengers Initiative (AI) continued SHIELD's work after its collapse to corruption, with Steve as the Head Strategist and Tony as the Director. The Avengers are living together in the Tower - Bucky has healed, and Civil War never happened because Tony and Steve worked through their differences like adults.

I do not own anything Marvel related or the Taylor Swift song. This is an unofficial fan work. No copyright infringement intended. This is a work of fiction. Any similarity to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events, is purely coincidental.

AUTHOR MASTERLIST | AO3

You heard the door of Steve’s floor of the Tower open and close and curled yourself up tighter against the corner of the couch as if doing so would make you disappear. You hugged your knees tight against your chest and hid your tear-streaked face from the world and your boyfriend, whose steps you now recognized even without seeing him.

Despite its impressive size, the piece of furniture refused to swallow you, and when Steve’s footsteps reached you, you were still there. Shame burned your cheeks. He’d come after you, even after you’d practically run out of the lovely, loud New Year’s Eve party upstairs, leaving mid-conversation while he’d been at the bar getting drinks. He would’ve had the courage to stand up. He wouldn’t have just run away.

“Oh thank god you’re here,” he breathed out, and you felt a pang shoot through your heart.

Steve deserved better than this. Wasn’t that the whole point?

“I’m sorry,” you murmured to your knees.

“Love, please, look at me,” he said, and the sheer pain in his voice gripped your heart and squeezed tight.

You managed to lift your face up to him and weren’t sure what to make of his expression. Sternness, as if he was preparing for an impact. Sorrow. Despair. God, you had done this to him. It was supposed to be a fun evening, with both of you dressed to the nines, Steve in a navy three-piece suit and you in a matching evening gown and in professionally done hair and makeup, which you were fairly certain had not budged even now.

“Can I sit down?” he said, and you nodded.

He lowered himself on the couch, and reached a hand towards you, stopping mid-air, and then letting his hand rest in his lap.

“What did she say to you?” he asked, and as you shook your head, continued. “Love, I need to know.”

You did not want to talk about this. You did not want to remember the journalist’s gleeful face as she’d oh-so-innocently dropped the fact that she had somehow gained access to all the things you had never wanted to become front-page news in the kind of gossip rags you certainly didn’t want to be featured in.

“She knows,” you sniffled. “She knows, and next week everyone will know I’m not worthy of you.”

“Hey,” Steve said. “Hey, come here. Please. Please don’t talk like that about yourself.”

You should not. You should let him go, be grateful that you’d been his for over a year, be grateful for everything you had been given, and accept that he deserved better than someone like you. As the journalist had so kindly said in between the lines. Someone with your history certainly wasn’t worthy of being the girlfriend of Captain America, or god forbid, Mrs. Rogers.

And yet, it was impossible to stop yourself, to rob yourself of the solace only Steve could give, the warmth, the safety. You went to him when he opened his arms, crawling into his lap and burying your face against his neck. For a few minutes, his palm just ran over the jewel-covered back of your dress. You’d felt so beautiful today, and now you felt thoroughly rotten.

“I’m sorry,” he finally breathed out after you’d stopped shaking — you only realized you had been shaking when it stopped.

He was sorry? What the hell was he sorry for? The sheer surprise at his statement made you lift your head and shift to straddle his lap so that you could meet his gaze properly. His hands settled to rest on your hips.

“Steve?” you asked, and the sigh that left him seemed to originate from the very depths of his soul.

“It’s my fault,” he said. “I… If it wasn’t for me, they wouldn’t be infringing your privacy. I’m a public figure, whether I want it or not, and you shouldn’t… You shouldn’t have to cope with anything like this because of that. There’s nothing, nothing to be ashamed of about what you’ve gone through. And I am certainly not ashamed of you. But you should get to choose whether you disclose it or not. And now you can’t, because of me.”

He was gritting his teeth, his jawline so sharp it could’ve cut bulled-proof glass, and it occurred to you that of course this would happen. Of course he would end up blaming himself for this, for failing to protect you from the bad side of being a superhero in the limelight.

“Steve…”

It broke your heart to look at him. You knew he was right about the fact that there was nothing to be ashamed of for having a bad past and having struggled with mental health and having needed therapy and other medical assistance because of that. But he was also right that it should’ve been your choice to talk about in public, if you wanted to.

“It’s not your fault,” you murmured. “I just… I shouldn’t be ashamed but I am. And I’m ashamed of that. And I just… When she started talking about it, I just panicked, I just had to get out of there. I’m sorry I left so suddenly.”

“It’s okay,” Steve said, the back of his hand gently swiping the tears on your cheeks away. “It’s okay. It’s private; I am so proud of you for everything you’ve conquered, and since there is no putting this genie back in the bottle, I will be so proud of you if you want to spin this into you becoming an advocate for it. But I will be just as proud of you if you don’t want to do that. It’s tough, having the public eye on you, and I’m sorry I pulled you into this out of my selfishness. She had it the wrong way — it’s me who is not worthy of you.”

“Steven Grant Rogers,” you huffed. “You stop that nonsense at this instant. You couldn’t control it any more than I could. I chose this. I am here because I love you, and I’ll be damned before some stupid gossip rag writer takes that away from me.”

He looked at your stern face, and his forefinger trailed the edge of your jaw — as if he didn’t quite believe you were there. There was an awestruck expression in his eyes.

“There she is,” he breathed out. “I love you so much. You are so strong. And you very much are worthy of me. More than I could’ve ever wished for.”

You swallowed. There was a light on his face, something so kind and pure that it was impossible to resist, breaking through the clouds of the earlier conversation.

“So you aren’t mad at me?” you said with a tiny voice, and the shock on his face shot through your chest — before he could ask, you offered an explanation: “I ruined our night.”

“She ruined our night, and I’ll make damn sure her press privileges to AI events will be removed,” Steve said through gritted teeth, and a very, very pleasant — if out of place — shiver shot down your back. “But I am not mad at you. Not in the slightest. I want to be with you — I loved you before you told me, and nothing about that changed then, or now. It isn’t something that defines you. And I’m sorry I wasn’t there to protect you.”

You let out a soft breath, resting your forehead against his. Adrenaline was draining from your body, the panic reaction settling as Steve’s comforting presence made its way into every cell in your body, leaving a tingling warmth in its wake.

“You can’t protect me from everything,” you murmured.

He closed his eyes for a brief moment, a sigh leaving him.

“I know,” he said. “Sometimes I just wish I could. But what we will do is get the legal department on this, to see if there’s any way we can stop it — and see if they can find out how the hell she got access to it in the first place. It’s the kind of personal medical information that probably can’t be just aired out.”

You nodded, but you also knew that stuff like this tended to find its way through the grape wine, even if the legal department was able to stop it from making front-page news. Steve seemed to read your thoughts from your face and gently brushed your cheek with his thumb.

“But regardless of what happens, I’ll be there every step of the way. I’ll always be there for you, honey.”

You leaned your face into his hand and let the knowledge of that wash away the bad emotions still lingering inside you. You would have to live with your past, but Steve was right: it wasn’t something that defined you, and he would be there.

“I know,” you whispered. “And I’m so grateful I have you, love. You’re the best boyfriend I could hope for.”

Something lit up in his eyes; it seemed like he was almost grinning, even as his smile changed only a little, and his thumb brushed over your bottom lip. He trailed the movement with his eyes before meeting your gaze again.

“Well, I was actually wondering if you would give me a promotion?” he said, and now he was grinning even as your brow furrowed.

A promotion? From being a boyfriend…?

Oh.

Oh.

You swallowed, and you were fairly certain your eyes were the size of saucers when he reached for the inner pocket of his suit jacket. But could he mean…? He would never joke about this but this was ridiculous and silly after what had just happened and…

It was just right.

When he produced the little blue velvet box from his pocket, your eyes were brimming with tears for an entirely different reason.

“I actually had a little different plans for us tonight,” he said softly, snapping the box open with one hand and taking your hand with another. “I did intend to take you to the roof when the fireworks started and get on one knee there, but I… It’s about us, love. It’s for us and for no one else, and I think you know I wouldn’t just ask this to make you feel better. But I think the right course here is to not let anything ruin our night.”

Your heart raced in your chest. The oval blue sapphire, flanked with two smaller colorless diamonds in a platinum band — and really, smaller was a bit of a stretch here, with how the ring would likely be visible from Jupiter — glimmered in the soft light of the living room. It was gorgeous and your hand was shaking just a little in his grip. You managed to tear your eyes off the ring and look into a different kind of glimmering blue in Steve’s eyes. He swallowed, his voice just a little thick despite the soft smile on his face.

“You’re the one I want, love, and I love you more than anything. You make me a better man every day, and you give me a reason to fight. Would you do me the honor of becoming my wife? Will you marry me?”

Somehow, you managed to speak. Somehow, even as the world was spinning, your throat felt thick, your eyes were glazed over with tears, and your heart was exploding.

“Yes. Yes, Steve, I will. I would. I do,” you babbled, and he laughed like a spirit of a cloudless summer day when he pulled you in for a kiss.

“That last one you’ll have to wait a moment to say,” he whispered between the kisses. “But I look forward to hearing it, more than anything. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

And after he slipped the ring to your finger, he stood up from the couch with you still on his lap and carried you to the bedroom. And when he took you apart again and again with the meticulous care of a strategic man, when he whispered words of love and desire into your ear, when he murmured praise onto your skin, you felt like you were exactly where you belonged.

With him.

In his embrace, it was impossible to feel anything but worthy.

[5ummit]

Permanent Blacklists for AO3

Would you like to permanently remove fics with your squicks, triggers, and dislikes from all AO3 searches by default so that you never have to think about or encounter them again? Well now you can!

The ability to do this has actually been around for a little while but it relies on some new CSS functionality that wasn't supported on all major browsers until fairly recently (though you may still have to enable it manually on some). I'm not going to explain how this method works or how to code AO3 skins in general, as I've only dabbled in it a little and there are already some very good tutorials out there. If you want all of the details, check out these guides:

Skins and Archive Interface FAQ – The official skins guide created by AO3. Lots of good information but might be overwhelming and confusing for a beginner.

A Non-Extensive Guide on How to Start Creating a Skin for AO3 by ao3skin – Some good, fairly easy to understand, beginner info on CSS and specifically how it applies to AO3 skins.

Permablocking Specific Tags - Site Skin by Eli0t – Everything you need to know to create permablock lists. If your blacklist doesn't seem to be working as expected, check this for troubleshooting tips.

What I can offer though are some handy pre-made blacklists that you can use as-is or as a starting point to create your own so that you don't have to go to the trouble of figuring out how any of this works or hunting down relevant tags. Just copy the code, open AO3, go to My Preferences > Skins > Create Site Skin, paste it in the box, title it, and click Submit!

Note: The following lists are very specific to me and my own personal tastes. Absolutely no judgement if you love any of the things that I choose to blacklist. You do you. I just happen to like my fics fucked up and relatively canonical.

★ No Reader Fic – Hides all self-insert and reader fic.

★ No Alternate Universes – Hides anything tagged with the most common AU tags. There are so many incredibly specific AUs there's no way to list all of them and AU tagging is also extremely inconsistent from fic to fic so this blacklist may only catch 80% of AUs, but that's better than nothing. You could always exclude the entire alternate universe tag, rather than trying to list specific ones, but unfortunately canon divergence and other less extreme AUs would get caught in the crossfire, which is not worth it for me.

★ No Fluff – Hides anything tagged with the most common fluff and romance tags. I specifically left out "fluff and angst" though because sometimes that's used for things that are mostly angst with only a bit of fluff and I do love angst.

★ Bonus: No Dead Dove – This list is not mine (for obvious reasons) but I know some people may find it useful. Hides anything with the main archive warnings and many common problematic, taboo, or controversial tags. Some of these I wouldn't even classify as dead dove, they're literally just kinks, so I'd suggest reviewing the list carefully and removing any that don't apply to you.

Additional Notes:

This system doesn't work exactly the same as AO3's exclusion filters because you can't use top-level wrangled tags to block all subtags. It only blocks exact matches.

Once the blacklist is implemented you'll see no indication that anything was blocked (except for fewer fics listed on each search page); the entire blurb will be hidden. The tags and fic counts listed in the filter bar will remain unchanged. If you want more advanced features like whitelisting or adding something to indicate when a fic was removed, check out the permablocking guide by Eli0t.

Here's a link with info on which browsers currently support the new "has()" element, which this blacklist system relies on. As of right now Firefox for desktop still has to be manually enabled (for instructions see the section on flag enabling in the permablocking guide). Firefox for iOS isn't listed on this website but it seems to work fine for me.

There are other browser-specific extensions that let you permablock tags, such as this one and this one, that may be more a little more user friendly, but I've never tried them so I can't vouch for them and they may not work consistently between different devices. The good thing about doing blacklists via skins is that, after setting it up once, it should work automatically on pretty much any device (as long as you're logged in to your AO3 account).