#god‚ i wish there was an easier way to do these things. an easier way to learn. an easier way to live. i fucking hate being in pain and i

[creatur3featur3]

Street Rat

Word count: 3.4k

A/N: uhhh.... street rat! reader, pathetic thing yayyy!! i'll probably build off this eventually- work has been kicking my ASSS

not proof read, i'm tired, i work and have a new kitten 😭

-----enjoy my loves-----

You weren't the sharpest tool in the shed, let's just say.

Having your ass handed to you by some hooligans when trying to swipe their bag of cogs at one of the various bars in the Undercity isn't one of your finest moments let's be honest-

You cough with a groan as the older male of the group grabs you by your chin, forcing your hazy eyes to meet his, the blood running down from the gash over your left eyebrow not making it any easier for you to focus.

His eyes narrow as your own do, he scoffs and lets go of your chin allowing you to fall onto your hands with a groan of discomfort. “A shame we had to get our hands dirty with such a little thing,” he comments, the other men chuckling as your stomach churns- “we could've had a better time doing more entertaining things than fighting.”

You scoff sourly as you try to get up, pushing off the dirty concrete under your hands, spitting out some blood out of your mouth with a growl, “god you wish…” you hiss, before a pained yelp falls from your lips as the man’s boot makes contact with your ribs, kicking you back down.

You hold the spot he kicked, whining softly at the pain as the man walked closer to you, leaning on his knees as he tilted his head to the side, “you're lucky we've got a card game to finish up.” 

and just like that, they left you on the street, bleeding, maybe dying a little but who cares? Nobody, it seems like as you lay there for god knows how long until you hear a sharp scoff off to your right.

Your eyes trail up to see.. a cyborg.. woman?

your... not really sure what the fuck she is..

She's smirking at you with a mix of amusement and- slight.. worry?

“The fuck you looking at..?” you hiss, trying to hide the wince of pain in your voice.

The woman scoffs and she rolls her eyes, “You, you look like absolute fucking shit .” 

“Thanks.”

“Your welcome, Doll.”

Sevika smirked, crossing her arms over her chest as she leaned lazily against the grimy wall of the alley. Her mechanical arm whirred faintly, catching the dim, flickering light from a nearby streetlamp. Her gaze swept over you, taking in your bruised face, bloodied lip, and the way you were clutching your ribs like you might fall apart if you let go.  

“Don’t let the blood fool you,” you growled, voice shaky but determined. You pushed yourself up to your knees, swaying slightly as the ground spun beneath you. “I can still throw a punch.”  

Sevika let out a low, amused chuckle, shaking her head. “Oh, I’m sure you can, doll. But let’s be real—one good gust of wind might knock you out right now.”  

You glared at her, your vision still a little blurry from the gash above your eyebrow. “Don’t test me.”  

“Oh, I’m terrified,” Sevika mocked, the smirk on her lips widening. “Look at you, all bark and no bite. You’re a scrappy little thing, I’ll give you that. But you’re lucky those guys didn’t finish the job.”  

You bristled, the mix of adrenaline and indignation overriding the pain for just a moment. “I didn’t need your commentary, tin can.”  

Sevika’s smirk faltered for a split second, replaced by something sharper—something dangerous. She pushed off the wall, her full height towering over you as she took a slow step closer.  

“What was that?” she asked, her tone low and threatening.  

For a moment, you hesitated, the weight of her presence pressing down on you like a physical force. But you weren’t about to back down.  

“I said,” you rasped, squaring your shoulders despite the ache in your ribs, “I don’t need your help or your attitude. I can handle myself.”  

Sevika snorted, shaking her head as she crouched down to your level. The smell of smoke and oil clung to her like a second skin. Her dark eyes locked onto yours, her expression caught somewhere between amusement and pity.  

“Sure you can,” she said, her voice dripping with sarcasm. “That’s why you’re lying in a puddle of your own blood, playing tough with someone who could snap you in half.”  

You opened your mouth to retort, but she cut you off, standing abruptly and letting out a sigh. “Listen, I’ve got better things to do than babysit some half-dead alley rat. But I’ll give you a choice: I can leave you here, and maybe you bleed out before those assholes come back to finish what they started… or you can swallow your pride and let me help you.”  

The choice hung heavy in the air, her sharp gaze daring you to refuse.

But as needy as you were, you had a hell of a lot of attitude.

You scowled up at her, spitting blood to the side again as you forced yourself to your feet, clutching your ribs. “I’ll take my chances with bleeding out, thanks,” you snapped, glaring daggers at her. “Don’t need some half-baked hero act from a walking toolbox.”  

Sevika blinked at you, her smirk fading into something colder. Her expression didn’t shift much—she just raised an eyebrow and let out a short, humorless laugh. “Suit yourself, doll.”  

With that, she turned on her heel, her mechanical arm flexing slightly as she stuffed her flesh hand into her jacket pocket. Her boots clacked against the cracked pavement as she strode toward the mouth of the alley, her figure disappearing into the haze of smoke and faint neon light.  

You stood there, swaying slightly, a mix of frustration and regret bubbling in your chest. You hated that you’d let her get under your skin, hated even more how quickly she dismissed you like you weren’t worth her time. But mostly, you hated the way your stomach growled, reminding you how long it had been since your last meal.  

Your pride warred with your desperation as you lingered, gritting your teeth. Eventually, with a growl of frustration, you limped forward, catching sight of her just as she was about to round a corner.  

“Wait!” you called out, your voice cracking slightly. Sevika paused, glancing back over her shoulder with a raised brow.  

You hesitated, fidgeting as you leaned heavily against the wall. “Do you… have any cash on you?” you mumbled, avoiding her gaze.  

Sevika’s smirk returned, slow and deliberate. She turned fully, crossing her arms as she studied you. “Cash?” she repeated, as if testing the word out. “Didn’t you just tell me you didn’t need my help?”  

You glared at her, though it lacked the venom it had earlier. “Yeah, well, I changed my mind. You gonna gloat, or are you gonna help?”  

Sevika chuckled, taking a step closer as she fished something out of her jacket pocket. “You’re lucky you’re kind of amusing, doll,” she muttered, tossing a small hand bag of whatever your way.  

You caught them awkwardly, wincing as the movement jarred your ribs. Sevika watched you for a moment longer before shrugging and turning to leave again.  

“Don’t spend it all in one place,” she called over her shoulder, the amusement in her tone unmistakable.

—(time skip)

It wasn’t anything new. The Undercity thrived on desperation and violence, and you were just unlucky enough to keep getting caught in its teeth. The older woman who ran a small, rundown food stall had been kind to you once, giving you a hot bowl of soup when you looked ready to drop dead on her doorstep. You hadn’t expected her generosity to last forever, but that didn’t stop you from trying your luck again.  

The air smelled of damp metal and stale grease as you crept toward the stall, your stomach twisting with hunger. You spotted the woman setting up for the day, her wiry frame moving with practiced ease as she laid out bowls and utensils. You opened your mouth to call out to her when a sharp voice behind you made your blood run cold.  

“Well, well, if it isn’t the little street rat again,” sneered a man’s voice.  

You turned slowly, your heart sinking as you saw a familiar face among the group of three closing in on you. One of the same guys who had beaten you senseless a few weeks ago, the gash he’d left on your brow now a faded scar.  

“Back for more, huh?” he taunted, cracking his knuckles. “Figured you’d learn your lesson by now, but I guess some people just can’t help being stupid.”  

Your throat tightened as you took a shaky step back, glancing around for an escape route. The older woman at the stall had noticed the commotion and was watching with wide, worried eyes, but she didn’t make a move to intervene. You couldn’t blame her. Getting involved in fights like this only brought trouble.  

“Look, I’m not looking for any problems,” you said quickly, raising your hands in a placating gesture.  

“Too late for that,” the man growled, and before you could react, his fist connected with your stomach. You doubled over with a choked gasp, falling to your knees as the air was knocked from your lungs.  

The others closed in, one of them yanking you up by the back of your jacket. You squirmed, trying to throw an elbow, but it only earned you a sharp jab to the ribs that left you gasping.  

“What’s the matter?” one of them jeered. “Thought you said you could fight?”  

You clenched your teeth, glaring up at them through the haze of pain. A part of you wanted to fight back, to spit in their faces and prove you weren’t some helpless victim. But another part of you—one that was tired and bruised and just plain done—knew you didn’t stand a chance.  

“Maybe we should make an example of this one,” the leader said, his grin sharp and cruel.  

Before he could act, a low, familiar voice cut through the tension like a blade.  

“Didn’t realize it was open season on small fry,” Sevika drawled, stepping out of the shadows. Her mechanical arm gleamed faintly in the dim light, and the way she stood—casual but coiled, like a predator about to strike—made the group pause.  

“Sevika?” you rasped, half in relief, half in disbelief.  

Her sharp gaze flicked to you briefly before settling on the men holding you. “Let the kid go,” she said, her voice calm but laced with steel. “Unless you want to see how hard I hit.”  

The group exchanged uncertain glances, clearly weighing their odds. But Sevika’s reputation was enough; with a few muttered curses, they dropped you unceremoniously to the ground and retreated, disappearing into the haze.  

Sevika watched them go before turning her attention to you. She crouched down, her expression unreadable. “Didn’t expect to find you playing punching bag again, doll,” she said, her tone somewhere between amusement and exasperation. 

You scowled up at Sevika, wiping a trail of blood from the corner of your mouth with the back of your hand. The ache in your ribs flared as you shifted, but you ignored it, your pride stinging more than the bruises.  

“Didn’t ask for your help,” you hissed, glaring at her as she stood over you.  

Sevika didn’t flinch, her sharp eyes sweeping over you with an air of practiced indifference. “Yeah, well, you looked like you were about to lose a few teeth,” she shot back, standing to her full height and turning away. “Try not to get yourself killed, kid.”  

And just like that, she walked off, her boots echoing against the concrete.  

For a moment, you stayed where you were, stewing in your frustration. Your gaze dropped to the ground as you weighed your options. You could stay here, licking your wounds and pretending you didn’t need anyone, or you could—against all your better judgment—go after her.  

You gritted your teeth. The idea of trailing after Sevika like some lost puppy made your stomach turn, but… where else were you going to go? You were broke, bruised, and starving, and while Sevika wasn’t exactly the picture of compassion, she’d gotten you out of a tight spot twice now.  

“God, I hate this,” you muttered under your breath, forcing yourself to stand despite the pain in your side.  

Your legs carried you after her, the distance between you and her widening until you broke into a stumbling jog to catch up. Sevika didn’t even glance back as you fell into step behind her, her broad shoulders cutting an imposing figure against the dim light of the Undercity.  

“I’m not following you,” you blurted after a moment, more for your own dignity than anything else. “I’m just… heading the same way.”  

“Uh-huh,” Sevika said, her tone flat.  

You glared at her back, resisting the urge to snap at her again. “Where are you even going?”  

She shrugged, her mechanical arm whirring faintly as she adjusted her jacket. “Somewhere that doesn’t involve babysitting,” she said dryly.  

“Great,” you muttered, ignoring the heat rising to your cheeks. “Guess I’ll just… keep you company.”  

Sevika’s smirk was faint, but you didn’t miss it as she glanced over her shoulder. “Whatever you need to tell yourself, doll.”

Sevika didn’t slow her pace, her strides long and deliberate, while you hobbled along behind her, trying not to let your limp show too much. You were determined to keep up, if only to avoid looking even more pathetic than you already felt.  

“I’m not looking for a pity party,” you muttered at one point, more to yourself than to her.  

“Good,” Sevika replied without missing a beat. “Wouldn’t give you one anyway.”  

Her bluntness made you bristle, but you bit back any retort. Talking to her was like punching a brick wall—painful and pointless.  

Eventually, she came to a stop at a stall tucked into the side of a dingy building, the smell of sizzling meat and spices wafting through the air. The vendor, a wiry man with a crooked smile, greeted her with a casual nod.  

“Usual?” the vendor asked, already reaching for a stack of greasy paper.  

“Yeah,” Sevika replied, digging into her jacket pocket for a handful of crumpled bills.  

You hung back awkwardly, shuffling your feet as Sevika leaned on the counter, her mechanical fingers drumming a steady rhythm against the metal. The sight of the food—whatever it was—made your stomach churn with hunger, but you refused to say a word.  

That resolve shattered the moment your stomach betrayed you, letting out a loud, miserable growl that seemed to echo in the quiet of the alley.  

Sevika glanced over her shoulder, an eyebrow raised, while the vendor paused mid-motion, his eyes flicking between the two of you. You felt your face heat up as you clutched your ribs, trying to play it off like it wasn’t a big deal.  

“Shut up,” you mumbled to your stomach, cursing yourself inwardly.  

Sevika’s smirk was slow, her sharp eyes gleaming with amusement. “That you, or is there a dog around here I don’t see?” she teased.  

“Bite me,” you shot back, glaring at her through your embarrassment.  

“Careful what you wish for,” Sevika said with a low chuckle. She turned back to the vendor, gesturing toward you with her thumb. “Throw in another, on me.”  

Your jaw dropped. “I don’t need—”  

“Relax,” she cut you off, not even looking your way. “It’s not charity. I just don’t want you keeling over before you can finish being annoying.”  

You wanted to argue, but the smell of the food was too enticing, and the growl of your stomach made it clear you weren’t in a position to refuse. You muttered a begrudging “thanks” under your breath, still avoiding Sevika’s gaze.  

She didn’t acknowledge it, only taking the food when it was handed over and shoving one of the wrapped portions into your hands. “Eat,” she said simply, her tone leaving no room for debate, before turning to walk off again like nothing had happened. 

Sevika slowed her pace just enough to glance at you over her shoulder, watching as you tried to juggle eating and walking without looking like you’d never seen food before. Her expression was unreadable, her dark eyes sharp but not unkind.  

After a moment, she asked, “So, what’s your deal? You always been this bad at staying out of trouble, or is it just a recent thing?”  

You paused mid-bite, the question catching you off guard. Swallowing quickly, you shrugged, trying to keep your tone casual. “Guess you could say I’ve always been a bit of a�� ‘street rat.’”  

Sevika raised an eyebrow, slowing her stride as she turned to face you more fully. “Street rat, huh? That what you’re calling it?”  

You huffed, shoving another bite into your mouth to avoid answering too quickly. Once you’d swallowed, you gestured vaguely to the streets around you. “I’ve been out here for as long as I can remember. No family, no home, just… surviving. You know how it is.”  

Her expression didn’t shift, but her silence was heavy enough to make you squirm. You tried to fill the void with a bitter laugh. “What, you surprised? Figured you’d have me pegged as a gutter kid the moment you saw me.”  

Sevika didn’t respond right away. She was quiet for a long moment, her eyes scanning your face like she was trying to read something in the lines of your expression. Finally, she sighed, shaking her head.  

“Not surprised,” she said simply. “But living like that… it eats people alive.”  

You shrugged again, trying to play it off, but her words settled uneasily in your chest. “Yeah, well, some of us don’t have a choice.”  

Her jaw tightened, and for a moment, it looked like she might say something more. But then she just scoffed and started walking again.  

“Guess not,” she muttered. “But you’re still here, so I guess you’re tougher than you look.”  

The faintest flicker of pride bloomed in your chest at the comment, though you weren’t about to let it show. Instead, you fell into step behind her again, muttering under your breath, “Damn right I am.”

Sevika’s low chuckle echoed in the air, a sound that somehow managed to be both mocking and oddly approving. She didn’t stop walking, and her pace didn’t slow, as if she knew exactly what you were thinking. You hadn’t even noticed the way your steps had faltered as you’d walked alongside her, your gut twisting in something like regret.  

“You really do have a thing for getting yourself in trouble,” she muttered, glancing over her shoulder at you with a smirk. “A real talent for it, honestly.”  

You scowled, but didn’t respond, too tired to argue. Your feet dragged slightly behind her now, your earlier confidence slipping away like the last scraps of food you’d barely managed to scarf down.  

“Don’t look at me like that,” Sevika added, her voice turning more serious, though the faint amusement never quite left it. “You’re better off on your own, kid. Keep following me around, and you’ll just get yourself hurt more.”  

You didn’t even realize the weight in your chest until she said it. A pang of something sharp and uncomfortable hit you, like she’d just thrown you in the dirt and walked away from what little you had left of your pride.  

Before you could muster any response, Sevika turned her head fully, giving you a final glance before shaking her head. “Get your shit together,” she said with a scoff, “And don’t waste my time. You’ll be fine out here. If you don’t kill yourself first.”  

And just like that, she was gone.  

You stood there for a moment, frozen in place as the weight of her words sank in, the quiet hum of the city around you suddenly deafening. The sounds of footsteps on the slick pavement, distant chatter, and the endless pulse of neon light all seemed to fade as the emptiness of the moment pressed in on you.  

Alone again.  

You sighed heavily, shoulders slumping as you looked at the ground, your fingers digging into the fabric of your jacket as the cold from the night air settled into your bones. You didn’t know why it hurt this much, or why you still felt like you were following some thread that was barely hanging on. Maybe you were just too tired to care.  

But you’d never been someone who gave up easily, even if it meant keeping your head down and surviving the way you always had—alone.  

"Whatever," you muttered to no one in particular, your voice barely audible over the city’s hum. You turned away, heading in the direction you knew best: forward, with nothing more than the remnants of your pride and a half-empty stomach.  

It wasn’t much, but it was all you had.

(please ignore any random gaps, my ass still doesn't understand tumblr)

part 2

[fairyminnie444]

˖ . ݁𝜗𝜚. ݁₊ 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 ˖ . ݁𝜗𝜚. ݁₊

— 𝘗𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘥 𝘢𝘯 𝘢𝘴𝘬 𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘤𝘬 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺����𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘦𝘦 𝘪𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘥𝘰𝘶𝘣𝘵 𝘩𝘢𝘴 𝘢𝘭𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘺 𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘴𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘥, 𝘐 𝘋𝘖𝘕𝘛 𝘢𝘯𝘴𝘸𝘦𝘳 𝘳𝘦𝘱𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴!

✧˖ °. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁‧₊˚ ☾. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖°✧ ✧˖ °. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁‧₊˚ ☾. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖°✧

𝓟𝓞𝓢𝓣𝓢 ⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡

your subconscious is simpler than you think it is

you are NOT persisting if you are checking 3D and waiting for you DR!

you don’t try to manifest

Manifesting is instantly

how should I see the role of other people in my reality?

ENDING the cycle of main frequent doubts that arise in our minds once and for all

“At your command”

EIYPO explained for you to understand and absorb

do you sometimes have that feeling that you NEED TO DO SOMETHING/TAKE ACTION to receive what you want?

“BIG” manifestations

What’s the “secret”?

Why You Can Change Your Physical Appearance and Overcome the Limitations of Biology

Why Others’ Manifestations Can’t Block Yours

I already know everything!! How do I apply this to my routine?

The “Sabbath State”

Yes, it’s perfectly okayyyy if you forget or get distracted by your routine.

affirmations to make it easier and “faster”

the ultimate post u need to LET GO

understanding your EGO so you don’t let it hold you back anymore

how to feel your desire in a natural way even if it seems unlikely?

even a negative view of circumstances can lead you to a positive one

manifesting $100,000 is as easy as manifesting $1

you already understood that! you are already there!

𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕠𝕤𝕖 𝕪𝕠𝕦𝕣 𝕕𝕖𝕤𝕚𝕣𝕖 𝕒𝕓𝕠𝕧𝕖 𝕒𝕝𝕝 𝕟𝕖𝕘𝕒𝕥𝕚𝕧𝕖 𝕔𝕚𝕣𝕔𝕦𝕞𝕤𝕥𝕒𝕟𝕔𝕖𝕤

manifesting is supposed to be fun, light and easy!

~bad moments~ along the way happen, instead of ignoring them how to deal with them?

Act like the GOD you know you are.

✧˖ °. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁‧₊˚ ☾. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖°✧ ✧˖ °. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁‧₊˚ ☾. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖°✧

𝓐𝓢𝓚𝓢 ⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡

i want to increase my height

what if my desires stay in imagination ans never externalize?

can we manifest multiple sps?

time travel

What if others also try to manifest my celebrity sp…

how do you/did you convince yourself that manifesting/LOA is real

dealing with the 3D when it comes to using LOA (living in the wish fulfilled)

doubts affect my manifesting?

How does one take a very famous person « off the pedestal » in order to manifest them?

I want to change my birth name but i have to sign documental stuff

How I could live in the end when revising smth that if materialized would totally change my live in the 3d?

SPEC method

will it still manifest what we want even if we don’t have a clear picture on it?

I need help with my imagination.

how do i know if it's just taking its time or if i'm doing something wrong?

Can you go deeper into days/weeks of the 3D not changing and how to persist throughout the whole day when you're doing things?

What are your thoughts about getting back people who have p@ssed away? REVISION

YT Channels (sub, meditations, mentors)

I want to manifest the absence of something I've been experiencing for a long time (health and wellness related).

work on my self concept / deal with people who criticize or make me feel drained

simple breakdown to help you manifest your SP even if it feels delusional right now

trying to manifest a modeling career

manifest changing appearance and dna, but i also want to change my past to always have been this appearance and my parents too

everytime i think something is "never going to happen" or "hmm i've never seen xyz" it ends up happening?!?!

How can I manifest when I absolutely don't believe that I can?

how can i use daydreaming and listening to songs while manifesting?

someone asked me about my sp. what should I do in this case?

why is consuming more information about this law considered to be coming from lack when doing something in the 3d that "opposes your desire" not considered to be coming from lack?

I have too many things to manifest so what should I do? advice to me in harsh way

struggle with is my celeb sp and my dream job

how would you manifest hectochromia eyes?

EIYPO everything like a puppet and me it’s master pulling the strings? Does it mean that “ancestors,” “angels,” etc. are not existent, only me?

Why Some Manifestations Work Effortlessly

advices for manifesting with mental disorders

can manifest such extreme beauty that everyone in a shopping mall turns to look at me. Even though I'm not the standard and I'm common

I’m manifesting a new face, but visualising it doesn’t make me feel anything?

how do i make sure that happens for certain? i'm scared it won't

What do you think about manifesting being immortal?

+ tips on manifesting a bf/significant other

struggling with feeling the feelings and believing that it’ll happen.

I can never manifest anything related to MONEY purely

date with the guy I like However, I am a very physically insecure girl and I am too scared and nervous.

i dont know what i did wrong, i really thought this would work, i was sure about it but it didn’t and i can’t helped but feel discouraged

I have a fear that some of my manifestation will dissapear

If everything we are seeing in the 3D is assumptions we made through our life, why does sometimes when we are like 100% sure of something and then we figured it is not?

was confident, my affirmation was "no matter how and what, i have all A's" but alas i did in fact not get all A's.

i WANT to see a people who actually manifested things that changed their past, their reality

i wanna manifest more lenient parents

I’m religious so I believe in a higher power/god, but I do still believe in my own power/ Will this hinder my manifestation process because I believe in a higher power?

What am I doing wrong? SP related

how can i.. like manifest or just "undo" it??

I want to manifest my natural hair color being blond, but i have black hair and also my parents, do i have to detail everyone in my family who is blonde for my new genes?

I feel like I can't anymore, that I'm giving in… I feel stuck

i’m really confused in the living in the end thing and others things in my manifestation

I simply want to be like those people who are successful in curing their illnesses

what do you recommend me doing to change my birth year while not ignoring the reality and still living in the end?

Can our negative thoughts manifest if we think them for a long time and then stop thinking them?

How to use chatpgt to clear doubts and manifest

Tips for beginners

why do some people's jokes manifest if they don't assume those jokes are true?

how to stop paying attention to old failed attempts

How do you deal with hopelessness or desperation.

i’m scared that my fears will manifest itself and it’s out of my control

✧˖ °. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁‧₊˚ ☾. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖°✧ ✧˖ °. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁‧₊˚ ☾. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖°✧

[gotta-winwin]

(🎞️) ... hit the road docu.<> and for the ghosts that haunt me

masterlist | cyana's masterlist

word count: 3.6k tw: anxiety, mentions of bullying, panic attacks, blood, use of slut shaming italics are interviews cut between scenes + english a/n: this is a retelling of a story that is extremely close to my heart. school bullying is NOT a joke, and remember that you're beautiful, strong and that no matter what anyone else says - you define who and what you are. if any of the above trigger warnings trigger you - scroll away, stay safe, and come back for the next one 💓

“Cyana!”

Cyana turned to greet her, a mysterious, faceless young girl whose voice sounded all too familiar. 

“Chloe, hey.” She smiled, a wave of fond memories washing over her as she reminisced about what used to be. “I’ve missed you.”

“We saw each other yesterday, silly.” Chloe laughed, the sound sending sudden chills down Cyana’s spine. 

“Why are you looking at me like that?” Cyana asked, noticing the sinister glare behind Chloe’s friendly smile. “Chloe?”

“You really don’t know, huh?” Chloe chortled, eyes dancing with mirth, relishing in the glory Cyana’s confusion and fear gave her. “God, you really are dense. Just like your mother. Bet you won’t go to university, just like her.” 

“Stop that.” Cyana protested, and a sudden sense of deja vu washed over her. This had happened before. “What’s going on, Chloe? Aren’t we friends?” 

“Psh.” Chloe hid a smirk behind her hand. “You’re way too naive to be sixteen, Cyana.” 

Sixteen? She frowned. She was way past sixteen now. Turning twenty one just a couple months ago had hit her like a truck. She didn’t feel her age. In her head she was still sixteen, huddled behind bathroom stalls and hanging her head low in hallways. 

“Cyana?” A familiar voice spoke out of Chloe’s face. “Cyana?”

She blinked. 

“Chan?” 

The familiar face of her self-proclaimed twin and tour roommate hovered over her, blurred and hazy as she blinked up at him. Gentle fingers placed her glasses on the bridge of her nose, and a worried Chan came into clear view. 

“Are you okay, Nana? You were crying out for something.”

She sat up, nearly bumping into him as she looked around, disoriented. “I- just a dream.” 

“Do you want to talk about it?” Chan echoed the words his hyungs used to say years ago. “I used to get nightmares too. Jeonghan always said talking about it would make it easier.” 

She shook her head. 

“Cyana, she-” Dino paused, thinking. “She doesn’t like talking about herself very much. Sometimes I wonder if I really know her at all, and then I shake myself out of it because- she’s my twin. Of course I know her well. There are just some things she’s not ready to share yet.” 

Cyana could feel her hands shaking as she packed for LA. Although she had been mentally counting down the days of tour leading up to it, she hadn’t realized it’d be so soon. 

“Nana-yah?” Joshua knocked against the wall of her hotel room, poking his head in. “Are you all ready? We’re leaving soon.”

She hummed, keeping her head low, scared he’d pinpoint her red eyes and accuse her of crying. “Almost done.” 

Nothing ever got past Joshua.

“Are you alright?”

Cyana really wished people would stop asking her that.

“I’m fine.” 

“Cyana, she-” Joshua let out a breathy laugh. “Her tolerance for things is too high for her own good.” 

Lingering by her door, Joshua’s eyebrows were pulled tight as he watched Cyana continue packing, her hands quivering under the dim lights of the room. A storm cloud was starting to stir within him, something deeply unsettling and worrying hovering just above the horizon - Joshua could sense it. 

“I was never good at weaseling the truth out from others. Or forcing them to tell me. That was Cheol’s job. But he wasn’t there.” Joshua gave the camera a weary shrug. “It was what it was.” 

Wonwoo was the one who found Cyana on the cold tiles of the airport bathroom, ten minutes before their flight to LA. 

Pushing the door open with the brunt of his shoulder, Wonwoo crashed into the single occupant stall, disheveled and frantic as he stared at the girl sprawled across the tiles. 

“Cyana?” He gasped out, catching his breath as he bent down, moving her hair away from her face. “Everyone’s looking for you. What-” Reality hit him like a rock as he realized the severity of the situation. There were dozens, if not hundreds of fans outside, and Cyana was currently lying on the floor, her eyes bloodshot and unfocused. “Where does it hurt?” 

Her blurry eyes looked up to meet him as she took in his features. “Wonu?” 

“Yeah.” His hands hovered shakily over her frame as his mind short-circuited, scared to move her but equally scared to let her stay on the floor. “The floor is unsanitary, Nana.” He mumbled, trying to calm himself as he checked for injuries. “Where does it hurt?”

Her hand moved to her chest. 

“Your-” He paused, pushing his glasses back up the bridge of his nose. 

“I can’t breathe.” 

Ah. Panic attack. Why, Wonwoo had no clue, but at least he was familiar with these.

“Sit up. That’s good.” He braved a smile as he helped Cyana situate herself so she was leaning against the wall. Sitting down in front of her, Wonwoo spread his long legs in an uncomfortable position, but favourable for holding her as close as she needed. “Breathe. Slowly.”

He felt her whole body shake as she inhaled. 

“Breathe again.” He whispered, painfully aware of the time ticking away - a plane waiting to be caught. “Tell me what’s wrong.” 

He felt her shake her head, her hair brushing against his chin as she did.

“Please.” 

“I don’t want to go to LA.” 

Wonwoo had suspected so. “Why?” 

Cyana didn’t know what compelled her to tell him everything - but she did, crying on the bathroom floor in some grimy airport, covered in his arms. Wonwoo stayed silent as she spoke, his strong arms holding her together like glue as tears fell from his own eyes, mirroring the ones in hers. 

“Yeah, I knew. I knew everything.” Wonwoo told the camera, revealing the truth after nearly six months. “But once she had collected herself back together again, she told me to keep everything to myself. So that’s what I did.” 

“Cyana, you need to get out of bed.” 

Dino watched from his spot on his own bed, as Joshua gently scolded his roommate. He was confused why an usually active and energetic Cyana had been lounging in bed all day, practically every day since they had landed in LA. 

“Shua hyung’s right, Nana.” Dino quietly voiced his opinion, frowning when Cyana grumbled unhappily. “What’s been going on with you? So grumpy.”

“We’re here for our concert, right? So I don’t have to go outside.” Cyana argued, pulling the blankets tighter around herself. “Please don’t make me go out.”

“We’re here for a week, Nana.” Joshua sighed, exasperated. “You can’t stay here all week.”

Cyana’s lower lip jutted out. “Watch me.” 

Dino watched the whole exchange like a tennis match, his head turning back and forth as he watched them speak, confused by the sudden switch in language. “Nana.” He tried again, thinking maybe she’d be more receptive if it was coming from him. “Please? You said you’d take me sightseeing.” 

Cyana hesitated. She had agreed to Dino’s ask for her to be his tour guide, but that was before - 

“Okay, fine.” She relented, unable to take back her promise. “But only today. And we’re avoiding the popular spots.” 

Dino only got up excitedly, hurriedly getting ready and grabbing his bag. Joshua, on the other hand, frowned at her words. Avoid the popular spots? But why? Even as idols, they could often roam around unfazed, especially in the states, where Seventeen was yet to be a household name. 

“I was already worried then.” Joshua told the interviewer solemnly. “But we had enough bad vibes going around and- I guess I was praying it was all in my head, and that she was actually perfectly fine.” 

“You run away from your past until it all eventually coils up and attacks you all at once.” Cyana let out a defeated laugh. “LA was full of demons- demons I had fled to Korea to avoid. And now- well, tour had brought me right back where I started.” 

Cyana stared out into the vast ocean of fanlights trying to catch her breath. Joshua had told her - moments before running onstage - to just breathe. To ignore everything else around her and to just concentrate on the performance, on them. It was easier said than done because now, looking out into the crowd, all Cyana could think about was the probability of one of those fanlights being someone she knew. 

A small, miniscule possibility - but it terrified her nonetheless. The same kids that had threatened to destroy her could very well be staring up at her from the sea of fans and she felt too vulnerable. 

“Breathe.” 

Wonwoo appeared next to her, waving to the fans in their section but solely concentrated on her. He could hear her harsh breathing through the screams. “Breathe, Nana.” He reminded her gently.

It felt comforting knowing at least one person knew everything she was going through. 

Taking her hand and placing it on his chest, Wonwoo’s eyes fixed on hers, his expression serious but worried. “Breathe - like me. In and out.” 

Cyana did her best to follow the rhythm. “I’m trying.” She gasped out. 

“Good.” Wonwoo smiled, and Cyana basked in the light of it. “You’re okay.” 

“Mhm.” She nodded. She could make it through the concert - concentrated solely on the two of them, the little bubble that Wonwoo’s presence created around her.

Cyana could barely see her own hands as she stumbled offstage, making her way down the stairs the moment the stage screen had closed behind them. Her heartbeat was taking over her senses, drowning out the farewell cheers of the crowd. 

Reaching a hand up to touch her face, she let out a harsh sigh of both relief and disbelief. She was still alive. 

“Nana?” DK’s voice cut through the incessant hum in her ears. “Are you okay?” 

A hand grabbed her shoulder and she flinched away violently. “Don’t touch me.” She yelped out, terrified as she spun around. 

“Okay, I’m sorry!” DK yelped back, equally terrified by her sudden reaction. “You just don’t look so well and I thought- you might need a hand.” 

Her cheeks flushed. “I’m fine.” Cyana couldn’t believe she had just snapped at DK, who looked at her with hurt in his eyes as she stumbled away towards their changing rooms. 

“She looked almost drunk.” DK confided to the interviewer. “Stumbling around backstage, her hands digging into her neck and ripping out her in-ears. She looked sick. It was terrifying.” 

“I’ll go after her.” Joshua called out towards the rest of the group, who were all frozen, unsure of what to do. 

“Wait.” Wonwoo grabbed his arm, stopping him. “She’s not in her right mind right now. Something must have happened during the farewell ment. I’ll talk to her.” 

“Are you sure?” Joshua eyed the younger boy warily. Since when had Wonwoo and Cyana gotten this close? 

Wonwoo nodded, and Joshua could sense he knew something the others did not. 

Running after her, Wonwoo skidded to a stop as he spotted Cyana sitting, half lying down on one of the makeup chairs. 

“Cyana.” He approached her, raising his hands in a sign of surrender. He didn’t know what mindset she was in at the moment. “Nana-yah.” He reached out a hand to steady her, keeping her upright as she threatened to spill on the floor. “Look at me.” 

“I’m sorry.” She panted out, her eyes unfocused. “I’m sorry.” 

“What for?” The English felt strange against his tongue, but it got some sort of recognition from the girl as she raised her head to meet his eyes. 

“It’s all my fault.” 

“What is? Cyana, what?” 

“Don’t hurt me.” 

Wonwoo froze. “I’d never hurt you, Cyana.” 

“Chloe.” 

“Is that her name? The girl who hurt you back in school? The reason you left?” The questions left him in a flurry as he kept her upright, her entire body weight against his. He could tell she was on the verge of passing out. “Nana. I know you’re struggling, but you need to get it together. Please. Just until we’re back in the car.” 

Her eyes were glassy and her stare seemed to go straight through him. 

“Please.” He pushed up his glasses to wipe his tears away. Her condition scared him. 

“I don’t know how Wonwoo managed to get me back in the car.” Cyana spoke quietly, her voice barely above a whisper. “I don’t remember much about that night - after the concert. But the others told me I was a mess. A zombie. Living in my skin but not quite there.” 

Cyana watched from her place on the bed as Dino paced back and forth across their shared hotel room. Wonwoo had deposited her there, promising to be back once he had found Joshua, instructing a worried Dino to look after her in his absence. 

It infuriated Cyana that they were all treating her like glass, even though she knew the emotion was unfair. They were doing their best - and she could feel herself shutting down, her safety mechanisms whirring back into place.

Dino’s footsteps seemed to thud inside her head each time he moved. Her heart was racing as she recalled the familiar face she had seen in the crowd during their farewell ment. How she yelled out her name, and that all too familiar threat. I’ll destroy you, Cyana. She had. She will. 

“Could you stop moving?” She suddenly snapped, startling Dino out from his stupor. 

He looked up from his phone and frowned. “What?” Cyana had never used such a tone with him before. 

“Just- you’re being so fucking loud and it’s actually exploding my head and it’s just- too much!” She yelled out, her hands shaking as she balled them up into fists. “Just-” She forced herself to quiet down, although her body still shook with pent up rage. “Sleep somewhere else tonight.” 

“What?” Dino’s irises shook with pooling tears. 

Cyana looked away. 

“I want to be alone tonight.” Her voice grew weaker. “Please.” 

“Oh.” 

She couldn’t bear to look at the hurt that must be across his face right now.

“Okay.”

The door clicked shut behind him. 

Cyana sunk deeper into the bed, pulling the blankets over her as she squeezed her eyes shut, silent tears pooling from the corners. 

She had never felt so horrible. 

“You need to tell me what’s happening.” Joshua ambushed her the next morning, setting a breakfast bun and a cup of milk on her bedside drawer.

“Josh. It’s like seven in the morning.” She mumbled, tugging the sheets closer to her as she rolled away. 

She was tugged back by a stronger but gentle hand. “I don’t care if it’s seven in the morning.You need to tell me what’s going on.” 

Cyana knew he was right. 

“I don’t even know where to begin.” Her shoulders slouched as she sat up, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. “There’s too much.” 

“Start at the beginning.” Joshua sat down on the bed and turned to face her. 

“I don’t know what I was expecting, really.” Joshua told the interviewer. “Something about school, or acting, I was sure. But not what really happened. No sane person would’ve expected that. Especially for it to happen to Cyana.” 

Joshua listened as Cyana spoke, her voice strangely calm as she led him through it all - starting brand new in highschool, making friends, feeling included. His expression grew darker and darker as the story progressed, eyebrows furrowing as he imagined little Cyana in the scenarios she was speaking of right now. 

Cyana told him everything. How her close friends- her ride or dies had betrayed her, turning against her all because of rumors a girl had spread to her classmates. How they had bullied her out of school- out of LA entirely. 

“Chloe.” Joshua finally said after she had finished, gently wiping away a lonely tear that had fallen on her cheek. “I heard Wonwoo muttering about that name.” 

Cyana nodded. “She was one of my best friends. You know those people who take your phone and unlock it- and you don’t even bat an eye? Or how you subconsciously hand over your bubble tea for them to try. The first person you call when something good or bad happens to you. She was that for me.”

“And she turned everyone against you?” 

She hummed. It was a strange feeling - to re-explore the past. Cyana had found she never had any trouble when talking about it, because it’d always sound like a story she had made up. She’d forget it had actually happened to her. That is, until the stories become reality once again. “She said she’d destroy me. And she did. I never found out why, why she woke up one day and decided I was no longer a person who could feel anything she threw at me.”

“And being back in LA, like, triggered something?” 

“I guess. I was- it’s silly.” 

Joshua shook his head. “Nothing’s ever silly when it comes to stuff like this.” 

“Well, I- I was scared my classmates would find me at our concert and try to- hurt me. Or hurt one of you.” Cyana looked down at her lap, her cheeks burning. “It’s stupid.” 

“No.” His voice was firm enough to make her look up at him again. “It’s not. Every fear, however irrational you might think it is, stems from something.” 

Cyana nodded. “When did you get so wise, Shua?” 

Joshua’s lips twitched. “I’ve always been wise.” His expression sterned as he remembered his initial question. “You saw someone, didn’t you? At the farewell ment.” 

She let out a cough, choking on her spit. “How did you know?” 

Joshua let out a dry chuckle. “I think everyone could tell something went wrong during the ment.” 

“I saw her. Chloe. Standing front row, waving a Vernon banner.” 

“What did she do?” 

“She yelled my name, so I turned around and-” Cyana hesitated, as if the words refused to leave her mouth. “She said she’d destroy me. Just like she did in high school.” 

Joshua let out a shaky sigh. “You need to tell Coups. Or management.” 

Cyana’s hand shot out to grab Joshua’s leg. “No!” She protested. “I’m sure it’s just in my head or something. We’re leaving LA soon anyways, it’ll-” She tried pasting a smile on her face, as if to reassure both herself and Joshua it’d be okay. “I’ll be fine.” 

Joshua hesitated before agreeing. “Alright. But if anything else happens-”

“You’ll be the first to know.” Cyana finished for him. “I promise.” 

Joshua stood up, gesturing to the breakfast still sitting on her bedside table. “Eat. You’ve been rotting in that bed for two days. And take a shower after. Nasty.” 

She let out a laugh and Joshua brightened visibly at the sound. 

“She’s better now.” He told Mingyu, who was waiting anxiously by her door as he stepped out, closing it behind him. “Opened up. Laughing even.” 

“Thank god.” Mingyu’s shoulders relaxed. 

“You should go shower too.” Joshua made a face as he walked away. “You’ve been rotting by her door ever since she went in. You too, Dino.” He added, spotting the boy who was sitting on the floor in the hallway, eyes unfocused. “Get some sleep, she’s fine.” 

Cyana could hear all this through the walls, as she slid back into bed, her breakfast lying cold beside her. Her stomach churned at the thought of eating, and her heart weighed heavy knowing she had slighted Joshua. 

Sure, she had told him the truth about what was going on- what had happened. But she wasn’t better. She knew they’d worry themselves sick and be rendered useless the rest of tour if she didn’t get her act together - so that’s what she did. She acted. Thank god for her acting background, or she would’ve collapsed into Joshua’s arms sobbing. She nearly did, but she caught herself.

After all, Cyana was glue. Flexible, strong, hard to get rid of. Whatever broke her down, she’d get back together, she was sure of it. 

“Cyana.” 

She found herself back in her school’s gymnasium, surrounded by fellow classmates all dressed up. She knew this night. Spring Fling night - where dating was overlooked for one night in an all Catholic school. 

“Cyana.” 

She turned, and realized who was behind her. 

“Matthew.” She gasped out. He hadn’t aged at all, his hair was still infuriating lopsided, curls never landing straight, his eyes crinkled up in a large smile. “What-”

“I heard you’re so obsessed with me you wrote me over 200 songs.” His loud mouth split into a nightmarish grin. “Slut. You spread your legs open for anyone, huh.”

“What?” Cyana gaped at him. But- she had heard all this before. 

“Cyana! Look over here!” 

She turned, and blinked as a bright camera flash blinded her. 

“I’m framing this so I can jack off to it later.” The boy who held the camera was faceless. “You let Matthew, so why not me?”

“I don’t-” 

“Cyana!”

“Wonwoo?”

She turned around once again, greeted by Wonwoo, dressed in a pale blue suit, his hair pale white. He smiled at her with his hand outstretched. 

“Dance with me?”

She let out a breath of relief, reaching her hand out to take it. All of a sudden, something came flying towards them, causing Wonwoo to slump to the floor, blood dripping from his side, his glasses askew on his face.

“Wonwoo!” 

“You really thought we’d let you get your happy ending?” Someone laughed from the shadows of the party, the disco lights reflected against shadowed figures. “After I said I’d destroy you?”

She glanced back down at Wonwoo, who was on the floor, his eyes wide and frozen. She stifled a scream. 

“Cyana!”

“Cyana! Wake up!” 

a/n: oof. this one's a heavy one. i really wanted to bring this story into cyana's character - and if you can relate to any part of it - hope her journey to healing can help you in yours. fighting !! and remember: kindness is supposed to be a guarantee, not a "if."

[hazelnut-u-out]

I like how ‘Rick and Morty’ explores that C-137 isn’t who he used to be…

Or who he could’ve been…

Or who he wants to be…

He is just who he is, even if he feels like needs to be something else.

Wait, who is that supposed to be again?

I think a lot of us are like that. I know I am. I’m not the child and teenager I used to be. Shit, I’m not even the person I was in college. I mean, I’m an evolution of that person. Things happened and they changed me, and now I have to let that person go. I have to accept that I’m different now. I’m also not who I could’ve been if everything had gone right, or wrong, or somehow entirely differently than it did. I’m not who I wish I was, or someone who will never disappoint the people I love with who I’ve become. If I’m entirely honest, I don’t really know so much about myself.

I think it’s often easier to grasp onto a version of ourselves we understand. If you can tell yourself ‘this is me,’ that means you know why and how you feel the way you feel or do what you do. The downside is that it can feel like betraying your identity when you can’t live up to that idea.

Rick is a person. He’s not good or bad. He’s not a god. He’s not an idea.

He’s a person, even before he’s a Rick.

[goldentigerfestival]

Part 4 of the Vesperia differences between JP and the dub!

Part 1.

Part 2.

Part 3.

(Other) GTF Favorites.

As a heads up, I had to piece several images here as "one" image to circumvent the image limit because I was not about to make a part five by the time I got toward the end LOL.

For some reason the dub completely removed Alexei jokingly/sarcastically saying it makes his heart hurt (brings him down in this tl) how Estelle will come to her senses and see what she's done to her friends. As usual, the dub has a very weird habit of adding sentences where they never existed and completely removing sentences for no literally no reason.

I feel that "set you free" can also have the implication of saving her alive (which the dub heavily seems to lean toward versus wording that really shows Yuri's resolve here, the latter of which fits right in with Flynn and Ioder's acceptance that he may have to kill her), so I included this one to go with the previous case of Flynn mentioning that Yuri's group was going to "save" Estelle. The original is more ambiguous about her possible survival, but the dub leans more into being ambiguous in a way that doesn't lean toward her dying.

The dub changed this to nothing but literally "aye" so... do with that what you will.

Another case of them randomly wiping out an entire sentence (the last one).

As with other cases, there are some slight changes I don't feel are worth mentioning and often tend to be just slight changes in word choice that ultimately mean close to the same thing. This is generally the case for most of the spirit gathering arc. The overall tl of this arc is pretty much accurate, just with some odd cases like the above.

I really don't wanna say like, it's because Flynn's not around for a chunk of the plot in arc 3, but uh... let's be honest, it's once again as soon as Flynn gets back into the picture that the tl starts to go haywire again - especially where Yuri is concerned. Like. Literally. As usual.

In the dub, this was "but Duke isn't". Just putting this one here because I feel like this gives more of a sense how the characters are feeling about it, more than just him not working out in their favor.

This one was calling Ba'ul "weak" in the dub, but here Yuri is just asking if he's that stubborn about changing his form to a spirit. Putting this here because I feel using "weak" is a lot more harsh and has negative connotations on it compared to a more ignorant "stubborn" before Yuri understands.

Yuri mentions here that Duke seems to have thought a lot about what he's doing. In the dub, this was "he seems totally obsessed". Not sure what the reason for that change was.

Raven makes this more of a question in the dub, but here is more of him realizing it and putting the pieces together, so I figured I'd include this one since it's a slight change in a character's perception of something.

The first line was changed to "could you be any more worthless" (I guess because they thought the "boring" line was weird? idk lol). The second and third line got swapped for some reason, even though it does kind of change the general meaning behind what's being said.

Yuri says first that Sodia gave up, only to tell her she has no right to say it was all for Flynn (thus saying it's because of giving up). At least imo, in the dub it comes across as "you say it's for him but you gave up thus it's an excuse", versus "you have no right to say it's for him".

I'm trying not to say it again, y'all.

Karol says that Yuri going off alone is a bad habit. The dub changed this to "you keep forgetting us", which I'm kind of confused by because he's not forgetting them and literally told them to get ready to go to Tarqaron. Not really sure why they'd change this line since like yeah, it is a bad habit of his lol.

Another translation error in the dub, so this one's here for clarification. The dub says Astal "lost control", but Astal by this point is dead (and he never "lost control"). Judith also says in the dub that it made all the monsters gather here, rather than saying they've gone savage. It seems like they misunderstood something thinking Astal losing control brought all the monsters here, but obviously we know that can't be the case because Astal is dead.

This was changed in the dub to "it's our turn to do Yuri a favor", when he's actually supposed to be teasing him, which Yuri directly replies to.

Still trying not to say it.

Dub Karol sounds more like he's prepared to go in, but in the original audio, Karol sounds nervous about the hoard they're about to have to get involved with. Raven's line was changed to Flynn looking like he needs help and not that so much that he's cornered, and the original audio has him sounding more urgent about it. Minor changes here, but tonally I think they impact the scene differently (and definitely give more of a "this is really fuckin' dangerous" vibe in the original audio).

Another slight change and not an important one, but figured I'd include this since it has a slightly different meaning/vibe to it.

Including this just for Yuri's little laugh when he shows up (I love him! A Yuri Lowell!) and Flynn's shocked response. More tonal in change, but definitely worth a listen and will be linked below with Flynn's laugh!

This can also be translated as "it's simple/it will be simple", because it's "me and you" doing it. Imo this makes it more clear he's referring to just them (i.e. the upcoming fight) and not the entire group, but Yuri also specifically specifies "you and me", so it's much more clear that he's referring only to them (which I think, also given Yuri's levity in this situation despite the danger, shows how much they've completely come back from and recovered from the Nordopolica/Alexei stuff). Shoutout to Yuri deciding this on the spot and totally not even planning it though.

Again, there are some wording choice changes littered around, but nothing really significant (when I say small things, I mean things like Rita saying it's reckless for just the two of them to deal with this, versus the dub using "are you stupid?!". It basically changes nothing even if it is technically a difference, but I usually skip things like that because these posts would be even longer for changes that don't have a large impact).

As for the Yuri-Flynn-Repede battle, there were some... choice dialogue changes here.

Firstly, Yuri actually tells Flynn to be careful (rare carefulness from him, especially in regard to someone he knows can handle fighting).

Second, Flynn telling him not to worry was removed entirely.

Third, Flynn mentions (you too, i.e. you be careful too) if Yuri keeps looking away from the battle (and over at him), he'll have the rug pulled from under him.

Fourth, the dub changed Yuri saying he's just captivated by how handsome/good looking Flynn is (and I shit you not if Judith said that to Yuri people would call it flirting and it'd be localized as such, so yes, I am going to tell you that the dub changed it to avoid that). The original wording used is "ii otoko", i.e. good/nice looking man, which in translation could come across a bit awkwardly and would be more likely to officially be translated to "handsome"... if they weren't so spooked at the idea of it and had to wipe it for "the great Flynn Scifo" which is not actually what was said. Personally I'd say "nice looking man" has a very specific ring to it versus handsome, but again, obviously that might sound a bit odd in translation and might need some phrasing assistance.

Fifth, Flynn remarks that it's a ridiculous joke (the dub changed this to just "sh-shut up!").

Sixth, the goofy, playful tone Yuri carries when he says "I am being serious" was changed (very typical of the dub at this point though to remove his playfulness and I'm literally saying that objectively). Similarly, his following line's tone was also changed.

Seventh, "so we're kind of stuck". Yuri says he can't concentrate without talking, then ends (the battle conversation) with a following sentence of "it can't be helped!".

This could be translated in a few ways just to make it more clear what he's referring to (because a plain ol' "it can't be helped" is a bit too vague here), but you could translate that to something like "guess we can't help it", yadda yadda. My guess is that's where "we're kind of stuck" came from, but given the blatant trajectory change of the entire conversation, I'm not surprised I'm left feeling like the meaning of that line is just weird (primarily because he says that and the conversation abruptly ends, so they're not very stuck if Flynn won that one!) Something like "guess we can't help it/that's just how we are" etc imo would have done the job for translating that.

Flynn just sounds so, so happy and soft and my heart is full. Same dialogue in the dub, but the original audio was (imo much?) more lighthearted and so sweet and soft.

Made a clip of both their laughs because they're adorable and I love them.

No idea why the dub actually dropped her giving Yuri a whole ass honorific. Yeah, you can't always use JP suffixes in a dubbed game, but you can translate some of them to the closest thing they mean. Sodia here calls him "Yuri-...dono...", so rather than just dropping his last name in her accusatory tone, she calls him by only his first name and attaches a respectful term to his name.

Technically "dono" would mean "lord" or "master" in a non nobility manner, and is more of a formality than if she were to use, say, -san, which would have her referring to him as more of a regular/casual equal (-san is a suffix that often gets lost in translation, whereas dono can actually be roughly translated like it is here from this translator. Someone of her rank would still refer to others even equal to her rank as "sir" in translation, while people who use "dono" may also still use that term for people of their rank. Remember, at this point she's the second in command to the Commandant himself, so that's an awfully high bar for Yuri to have jumped in her eyes). Sodia has realized his actions have been just and honest and that she was very wrong about him, so as an indicator that she's changing her stance on him, she refers to him this way instead.

Basically, coming from someone of her rank, it's a very respectful term and is not used casually/in a casual relationship, much less to someone one dislikes or even hates (which she previously did, so this by itself is a massive step up in her view of him just from her suffix usage alone).

Honestly a huge shame that they didn't even translate this to "sir" in the dub when there was no reason not to. Just using that alone would have indicated a much higher level of respect from her toward him, and unfortunately that open respect is completely lost to dub only players (she only expresses her guilt, whereas in the original, just by using "dono" alone, she's indicated respect and not just guilt. In a way you could even argue that she's approaching him, someone she gives her respect to now, for advice and not just out of guilt alone).

In the dub this is only "it would have been easier if you'd blame me for this..." Here she's admitting she wants some form of punishment by way of saying she didn't receive it (which she could have from Yuri himself if he told Flynn what she did), but if she can't even have that, she at least would rather be hated. Basically, she's saying she wants to be hated if she can't at least be punished for her crime (and I believe you could also translate this to wishing she could be hated if she wasn't blamed for it, so basically they removed half the statement).

Also, in general, Sodia sounds very distraught.

Here Yuri admits he does have a grudge against her (you could translate this to something like "it's not like I don't hold a grudge against you"). The dub changed this to "don't think I'm doing this for your own good". Basically the dub is having him say he's making her live with her regret without mentioning that yes, he does in fact have a grudge against her for what she did.

The translation here is essentially the same (think about it for yourself. The dub just uses "go figure it out yourself").

The important part here comes in the form of how he refers to her. This is something he's done since he survived her stabbing him - not using a neutral form of "you" but instead openly using a rude form (in JP there are several ways of referring to oneself and others, similar to how Flynn alternates between boku and watashi when referring to himself).

In other words, Yuri is openly expressing disdain for her by using "teme". At this point he's been using it for a little while now (he also talks to her this way back in Nor at the inn as well. Worth noting that he starts out by using "omae" (neutral), but as soon as she drops the "I did it for Captain Flynn's sake", he hops to "teme" in a heartbeat, because of saying it was for Flynn but having just given up on him. Yuri continues using "teme" from that point on), but since here it's with very other little dialogue and also because she just recently referred to him as "Yuri-dono", I think it's a perfect time to point it out, as they've openly, verbally switched how they treat each other.

Sodia, wracked with guilt and left unresolved, has a newfound respect for Yuri after their interaction at Nor (and presumably everything he's done for Flynn). Yuri, still angry at her for what she did and holding a grudge (a fact lost in the dub that he mentions in this scene as mentioned above, adding to this role reversal), now openly chastises her and expresses his contempt by changing how he refers to her.

NEXT!

Not gonna put a picture here for it, but when Rita asks Witcher where his notes are, she gets super excited and it's just cute and funny.

Also not putting a picture here for this one, but Flynn sounds extremely relaxed/calm/casual in JP when he asks if Yuri is all set/ready to talk. Something worth noting is that even at this point, the dub keeps Flynn sounding very uptight and serious where he otherwise is relaxed, calm or even emotional. I get the feeling the dub kind of missed the mark with Flynn's soft gentle side. I don't know how or why, but it's more absent in the dub where he's otherwise much more soft.

Similarly, not pictured because this isn't about the translation, Flynn trying to convince Yuri to tell everyone what he's done is given in a more angry-upset tone, versus the original's (super!) soft and sad tone. Again, I think they had a different perception of Flynn in mind when it comes to audio (particularly in arc 3 here because the other arcs are... again, their own whole can of worms), because here he's speaking sadly that Yuri won't take credit, whereas in the dub it's more energy-fueled and comes off much harsher. I have a video clip of that scene here. I felt like mentioning it here because overall Flynn can be extremely soft and gentle in tone and it got lost in the dub for whatever the reason was.

Still on that train of thought, while the translation itself is still pretty accurate, Flynn says "I'll just yell at you again" but in JP says that he'll just say unnecessary words. Earlier, in the dub Yuri asks why he's so serious when he doesn't actually mention that he's being serious in the original (because honestly, he wasn't. He was very calm when they set out). In this case it's not really negative (the way Yuri yelling at people in the dub is portrayed negatively on their end), it's just... a change that I can only guess they had the wrong idea about with him? Previously the changes with Flynn were treating him negatively, but here it's more just... a notable but narratively generally neutral tone difference.

As much as I'm sure many people found the ass kicking conversation funny, the actual context is:

Yuri: Whatever it is (the feeling they're talking about), I'm hitting you with all my strength!

Flynn: Well then... I'll use all my strength to overwhelm you!

Yuri: If you can beat me, then beat me!

Not making a clip just for this unless it's requested, but when Yuri wins the solo fight against Flynn, in the original, Yuri says it with actual shock but awareness/clarity that it actually happened (with a sort of underlying excited vibe to it). In the dub Yuri says it with more of a laugh and disbelief.

As for this point onward, since the subbed playthrough ended before this point, I'll be using another playthrough for images, though I'll be translating them here instead since they won't be pre-translated.

Sliiightly different vibe here so I figured I'd include it (doesn't really change anything): Here Flynn says "Even with a sword... I lost." The reason I'm including it is because "I can't even win with a sword anymore" makes it sound like Flynn has been losing again and again to Yuri in various ways when it's always been the opposite. Using a sword has always been one of his highest selling points, so to lose in that area comes across more as, even with my best asset I still lost to you.

Yuri's line is more like, "(laughs) Serves you right."

Running out of images I can use for this post here but I really don't want to make another part at this point in the game, but Flynn's following line is more along the lines of "be proud of yourself" (literally "raise your arms (in victory/pride)"), to which Yuri says the same thing in both versions (Flynn's dub line is "you've gotten better"). Including this because "you've gotten better" to me isn't really the same as telling Yuri to be proud of himself for the victory (something he'd never been able to do before). Since the dub came across as much more casual, I figured I'd add this part here too.

During Flynn and Patty's conversation, Flynn says "it's true there is no end to my worries." In the dub this was, "I have no want for trouble". This was probably a mix up of terms/intended meaning honestly, because Patty was basically saying he has a lot of burdens for being so young. It's not about trouble so much as he just has a lot on his mind and a lot to worry about in his current position.

Flynn proceeds to say he's made up his mind, basically saying he's made up his mind to accept those worries. In the dub, he says he's prepared to face it (the troubles), versus that he's made up his mind in accepting these new worries.

Patty's response is "made up your mind?" In the dub it's just "is that right?"

Flynn continues by saying in the end he'll have to worry a lot (more literally with all his might, so basically he'll be experiencing a whole lot of worries in the future) and that it will be a tough road, but he won't run away anymore.

I'm not sure why the dub used "path full of pain" since that sounds a lot more dramatic than "it will be a tough road". I imagine yeah, there will be pain in the future, but full of pain just sounds a bit... much? The dub also removed "anymore" from "won't run away anymore". Not sure what the idea behind that was.

Patty follows up saying it's admirable but that's no good, which the dub changed to a fish pun.

I'd also like to mention at this point, Flynn has completely dropped his use of "watashi" in favor of "boku" (he uses boku normally, but typically switched to watashi for formality/his status as a knight, which indicates he no longer feels the need to do this around Yuri's friends, and possibly does not feel the same level of distance he used to. At the very least it means he's allowing himself to be more of himself/more familiar and not viewing his position as a knight so formally).

Here Flynn says "thinking together, worrying together, and then one day realizing the world we dreamed of". Adding this since Flynn in the dub says "if we all work through our troubles together". It's kind of the same thing and kind of not, since in the original Flynn isn't mentioning "troubles" between anyone - simply the idea of everyone doing this together (the rest is basically the same in the dub).

Another change I'm not sure what it was for, but Ioder never mentions the Entelexeia specifically. He says this (what he's about to say) concerns the empire, guilds and everyone who lives in the world (which would include the Entelexeia by default, but literally everyone else too, which is the point because he's about to tell them about the blastia to start making plans). The dub never mentions about this affecting everyone in the world despite that being the whole reason he wants to talk to everyone about this.

Yuri calls Duke an "ignorant fool" here, rather than a "stubborn bastard", which I'm including because "ignorant" and "stubborn" aren't the same thing. Yes, Duke is stubborn about it, but in Yuri's eyes he's also being very ignorant of everything they're trying to tell him.

Not grabbing an image for this, but at the end of the game when Yuri is talking to Duke right after the battle, he's completely out of breath before and when he starts talking (the first line). Just a very nice touch!

In the dub Duke says Eluficer's wish was simply to protect the world and all living things. Here Duke says his wish is to protect the world and all living things with a good heart.

Also don't want to use an image here because of the image limit per post (especially because it's already tight even with me putting what images I can into "one" image as it is), but Yuri says "yeah, let's do it" (including the others), versus "I'm on it" in the dub at Flynn's prompting. Not a big change, but he does treat it as the whole group doing it together, which I find to be a nice touch for his character development.

Patty actually says "it- it stopped?!" The dub goofed and wrote "it's- it's over?!". The power of the blastia wasn't enough and its power was weakening.

Estelle says "No way, after we've come this far!". The dub changed this for some reason to "but how? There isn't any more!" in response to Rita instead of leaving it as it was.

Judith says "Please!" The dub used "It's gotta work!"

Flynn says "It's not over yet!" For some reason the dub used "This can't be how it ends!", which... idk, I feel like original Flynn has much more faith in it LOL. Original Flynn is looking at this through a glass half full, while the localization is a glass half empty. Positive versus negative framing.

Yuri says "Is it no good...?" Dub Yuri says "Dammit... come on!"

For the most part the rest is the same.

Adding this in because the old cutscene in the 360 version had to get changed to accommodate where Flynn was. Somewhat different than what we see with the other characters, you can see the power shoot out and push Flynn back as if it was grabbing the blastia itself, and you can see it pulled away from him (with everyone else we just see the blastia head toward the rest!).

Aside from that, Flynn says "you are my pride, dear friend" (the dub changed this to "I am so proud to call you my friend, Yuri Lowell").

The voice acting took me out with the happiness portrayed in Flynn's voice. (For just the Flynn part of the ending, I have a clip of that too, unsurprisingly.)

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EDIT: Since making these posts, it has since come to my attention that it's been declared that claims have been made about Yuri's "rude speech" (in an argument about JP Yuri against the English version, which nobody but myself had recently discussed prior to these posts), and I did not even ever broach that topic. So, I'm dedicating this next portion to that and why it does not, in any capacity, change my mind or feelings.

Keep in mind, I do not care if you like the dub or its dubbed cast. I made these posts so people could learn about the version of a character I love, and understand why I am not happy with the direction the loc and dub took with him. These opinions are NOT common, and most of the western fandom loves dub Yuri and/or simply does not realize there are differences. However, as someone who loves a version not many people are familiar with, I made these posts so people could learn about it and possibly share my love of this character with me. Also, there's nothing wrong with explaining differences between versions and not liking changes. However, saying things like, there are "no differences", is simply untrue.

Yuri's general speech mannerisms are considered rude irl. In modern day fictional media, it doesn't really matter in the "rude" aspect because characters don't actually react to that. The way people speak in JRPGS/anime is very much not how people really speak in Japan.

Most important thing to note here: Translation is not simply translating the words used. It is intent. Using basic words to excuse changing a character's tone, or changing/adding/removing words to change the intent behind the lines, is not a faithful translation. In a video game with voice acting, tone and models/sprites/etc are also extremely important. Why do you think it looks off that Yuri is giving Flynn "the funny face" when he says "stop treating me like a little kid" with aggression? Because the face and tone were the indictor that he wasn't being aggressive.

Yuri's words, on a basic level, are "rude". For example, he speaks in a confident and somewhat demanding way by basic word choice. But if you were to say "go get me that folder", on a basic level, that can be perceived as rude. If the tone is light, relaxed and in the tone where it's almost a question, it comes across as more of a request. It can be said in a calm manner, such as if someone is working at a desk and is in the middle of something, writing a sentence perhaps, and is requesting that another person retrieves the folder while they're busy. It does not have to come across as aggressive or rude.

Again, intent is the main thing you want to carry over in translation. I've heard that manga authors, in more recent years, have expressed disdain at western localization taking their work and changing the intent and meaning behind their work. So yes, this does bother creators. Higuchi may be one of them, as I don't think he just decided to post that on Twitter just because he doesn't actually feel that way. If all you're focused on is the words and ignore every other aspect of the media, you lose that intent.

In Yuri's case, they not only changed his tone at times they kept the same words, but there were times they specifically changed his word choice to make him sound more aggressive. Language is more complicated than "the words he used would be rude in a real life setting", and people say all the things that could be rude if spoken in another tone. Once you go "oh, the words are rude so I'm going to change the context of what's being said to make it mean, aggressive, or actually rude, and change the tone of the character's voice", you've disregarded the intent.

The importance does not lie solely with the words. It lies with the intent and meaning of the character's dialogue (such as with Leblanc. Yuri speaks in a firm way where he's not willing to bend on going after Alexei, but he speaks with softness and understanding. There was no aggression whatsoever in his tone. His words were to indicate his firmness on a matter that he would not budge on, but it didn't mean he wasn't being understanding, sincere and considerate of the situation and the feelings of the knights in front of him.

That said, Yuri's speech is rough, informal, casual, and in JP speech can sound demanding. However, all of this is offset by his tone and physical mannerisms. You can tell he's not trying to be mean or rude to strangers. To his friends. It's simply how he speaks. He speaks like Spada, Vicious, Moses and many other Tales characters who I also adore, and you know what the localizations of Vicious and Moses didn't do (there isn't one for Spada)? Change their behavior to reflect rudeness in their speech. They found ways to work out their phrasing while having their personalities in mind.

Vicious is kept rude when he's actually trying to be rude. When he's not being silly or even sincere, they don't change his dialogue to make him still sound rude. As an example relevant to Yuri, Yuri's entire tone in the scene with Leblanc was changed, and they removed him using "tanomu", which in that scene would translate to "please". Yuri, softly and sincerely and with remorse and understanding, says "please don't get in our way". The dub removed this and has Yuri aggressively saying "don't get in our way". No sympathy, empathy or mutual grief in his voice whatsoever.

There are ways to get his speech across without affecting his actual personality. Similar to Yuri, Spada speaks like a damn thug. However, you can clearly tell in his voice and overall demeaner at the moment how he's feeling. When he's riled up, when he's toned down, etc. Yuri is the same way. Similar to with Moses and Vicious, there is no need to change their dialogue to try to reflect a portion of JP speech that can't be translated.

Overall, Yuri is kind, generous and understanding. If he's saying something that in JP that sounds demanding, you need to use context and his tone/overall attitude/mood atmosphere to tell if he's actually being rude. Is he rude to Ragou? Yeah. Cumore? Yeah. Ioder? Uhhh, no. He talks like he always talks, but he adjusts his tone to not sound threatening or rude. The one time he's annoyed at Ioder, all he says in this mildly annoyed voice is "say anything else and I'll punch you". It was his way of saying he didn't want to talk about that anymore. The localization has him darkly and threateningly literally threaten the guy with an actual weapon. Yuri doesn't threaten good people, much less when he can tell Ioder isn't one of the bad ones.

There's a reason the localizations for Moses and Vicious (who I am using here as examples because they're characters I adore and other top favorites of mine, who speak very similarly to Yuri who have localizations that did not change their behavior) didn't try to translate their speech mannerisms into their personalities/tones. They found other ways to get those across.

These next two examples I'm using because one encompasses the context part, and the other has some similarities to Yuri's personality.

Vicious is extremely rude as a person, but he has very sincere moments where he opens up with his real thoughts to the others. Obviously there was nothing they could do about tone because there was no English audio for his game, but they did not do what they did with Yuri, which was change his actual context. They absolutely could've just put whatever they wanted regardless, like Hearts R did (which is a highly contested localization among the western JP speaking Hearts fans). Hearts R had only JP audio and still did whatever they wanted with the text. Will people who don't understand that dialogue realize it? No. Will they think Hisui was actually saying something rude? Yes.

Moses is fun, silly, goofy, and a little crazy. He literally is a bandit. His speech is rough. Informal. Casual. He uses rude terms. But he's not being rude. A little dumb, yeah! I'll be the first to admit my favorite guy ever is a little goddamn dumb! But he's not intending to be insulting. It's just how he speaks. The localization adjusted as best it could. And mind you, Moses is my favorite Tales character. If I took issue with changes to his character, I'd be hollering from skyscraper rooftops. There's a reason I'm not.

If you want an example of rude speech actually intended to be rude and is expressed rudely on purpose, look no further than early game Luke. After his haircut, he starts correcting his speech when he catches himself. He never speaks truly politely/formally, but he eases up on the extremely rude speech and it's reflected in his behavior.

So no, Yuri's speech being rude did not have to translate over in the localization/dub to him actually being aggressive. Other Tales localizations exist and have adjusted accordingly without changing context so intensely, or completely changing the tones of the characters. They made a choice with Yuri, and I don't agree with it. I don't agree with making him rude when he's not intending to be just because his speech is rough. This changes entire dynamics on the whole and during certain scenes.

I simply don't agree with the choices that were made, looking at every aspect and angle of the Japanese language.

Again, intent is key. If something is intended to sound a certain way, or to make players perceive something a certain way, changing that intent changes perception of a scene, moment, relationship, character, etc.

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Personal ending notes:

To sum it up briefly: I personally see a strong inserted bias put into the localization instead of just keeping things the way they were (i.e. changing context/character behavior to fit their bias despite that not being what the original context was, and inserting this into an official release). I say this because there are times when the translation is basically perfect, but there are very specific characters and instances where this suddenly changes, and unfortunately, there's a repetitive pattern that to me reads as intentional. Otherwise, I see no need for that to continuously happen only when select characters are involved.

As for the not so short version, y'all might be wondering why I mention things like it seems like they changed Yuri and berated Flynn so much on purpose. This is because the translation of this game sometimes can be astoundingly spot on. Perfect in some cases, even. There are times when the largest difference is just the wording itself and is simply given flavor, or uses a variety of wording so that sentences don't sound repetitive.

Yet when it comes to those two (individually but also between the two of them), the context quickly devolves into being either completely changed, the tones used are completely changed, and/or there's a slight alteration in the text that ends up giving a very particular notion that was not otherwise there (ex. "like a good knight" was added into Flynn's dialogue in a situation where he's being berated and yelled at, and it completely comes across as putting Flynn down the entire way through the conversation, versus him coming around and taking responsibility and that being accepted. In the original he simply mentions following his orders as a knight. There's no attempt to sound like the narrative itself is trying to insult him or bring him down).

I made these posts precisely because a heavy majority of the changed context involved them, and a lot of it either portrays Flynn in a negative light for the vast majority of the game which was not originally present, or it made Yuri come across as a much darker, scarier, "cool" type, which is a pretty stark contrast to his original personality/behavior.

Other things:

Yuri:

A lot of his lines come out neutral/flat, and that got even worse, like a hundred times worse, in his new DE lines. Yuri is pretty peppy in JP, and as a reference I would say his victory quotes are a big indicator of the personality shift ("cool" guy versus "silly" guy would be a big one for me). Other than that, Yuri is more silly and almost childish, sometimes even pretty pouty, and it shows blatantly right in his voice. He's also extremely not threatening to people who are not his enemy (liiike threatening Ioder with a real weapon with a serious voice).

I think the easiest way to explain this from my own perspective is that I adore JP Yuri completely. Dub Yuri I often find myself wanting to punch in the face for how he treats Flynn, Ioder and the one time, Leblanc. He lacks compassion in the dub where he otherwise does have it (even if it's not him being rude vocally/tonally, the dub dropped a load of emotional nuance in his voice). He's not a rough, overly cool edgy man (I hate people saying Yuri is an edgelord because damn if that ain't the farthest thing from the truth in JP, but it also shows how much they really leaned into that trope in the dub if people actually walked out of the game feeling that way about Yuri). He's a silly, goofy, caring man who is very gentle with people when they need a boost. That doesn't mean he doesn't have his "scary" dark moments, but the dub obviously leaned super far into it - enough that they would change Yuri mentioning punching someone to outright threatening to use a weapon against an unarmed man who is actually being quite polite.

Basically, he has a range of emotions and he has a lot of emotional intelligence. As one example, when he sees Karol down and sad when they first meet, he changes his tone to a combination of how you'd talk to a child with that child-y tone (he does this at the base of Halure's tree when he's asking Karol how to heal the tree), but then sometimes he shifts to actual gentle and soft to let Karol know he's there for him (when he's heading out to the woods to find the eggbear).

Ultimately, my point is that they took a perfectly well rounded character and changed him to, what? Fit their own bias/agenda/whatever? Because I can't look at both Yuris and be like "same person". I've never wanted to punch JP Yuri in the face. Only hugs here. What I'm saying is that I came out of both versions with two very different opinions on Yuri.

Next, Flynn (and Ioder and Leblanc).

Starting with Flynn, I get a very strong mindset of anti government shoved into the dub with these characters (i.e. not just the unnamed bad people in the government and the few named bad ones, but also directed toward the good ones, making it a more black and white approach). The dub makes Yuri out to be aggressive toward Flynn on the spot when they see each other again despite that in the original audio, he's not at all actually upset. He understands why Flynn is upset and that he's stressed out with his current mission. And no, the whole "Flynn swung a sword at him!" doesn't work here. Yuri knows Flynn. Very, very well. He reeeeally was not mad about that... especially if, you know, his tone in JP was anything to go by during and after. Flynn was the more upset one between the two, and Yuri remains calm - again, indicating his emotional intelligence and, most likely as it's not directly said, determining that being worked up about it would only cause Flynn more aggravation/stress. Thus, he doesn't press any buttons and remains calm. It makes his smile to Flynn later at Torim make that much more sense.

The thing is, I get the impression the dub wanted us rooting for Yuri and cheering for him digging into Flynn, when that was literally not the point of their interactions. We're not supposed to always blindly follow Yuri. Sometimes he is right, but sometimes Flynn is right. Like. That's it. That's the game. Not everything is simple or black and white. There's nuance.

That and/or like, someone in the loc team really hated Flynn. Based on everything, I'm... not against believing that at this point. Basically, the dub portrays Flynn in a negative light at most (arguably all) possible opportunities around every turn, even though the context/tone for that did not originally exist, until it couldn't anymore (i.e. he was past his character arc).

Ioder and Leblanc.

Ioder never does anything except keep Yuri in the loop, tell him important information and be genuinely happy to see him. There was never any vitriol between them. The way dub Yuri gives him an attitude just comes out of nowhere. Their relationship is pretty casual, which is pretty meaningful given that Ioder is on track to be on the emperor and Yuri is, plain and simple, a commoner. One who rescued Ioder, yes, but if Ioder was a "typical" noble in this game, he might have just brushed that off as "to be expected", even if Yuri didn't know he was saving a noble at first. Point being, Ioder is nothing but pleasant toward Yuri. Yuri has no reason to be rude, much less threaten him.

At Baction, JP Yuri is understanding that Leblanc needs to grieve and is in disbelief. He doesn't know if Leblanc will try to stop them, but he does offer his condolences with the tone of his voice, i.e. again: emotional intelligence. Something they changed in the dub to be nothing but rudeness and anger. Yuri made a statement to him at that moment, i.e. not to get in their way (mind you, again, he's polite about it given the situation), but not without understanding in his tone, which is a very common aspect of Yuri in his entirety. His wording (in general, not strictly with this specific scene) comes out rough and lacks politeness, but that's made up for in how he speaks to people (either relaxed, casual, gentle, etc).

In other words, the dub pretty much always slaps a point of view bias against these characters and uses Yuri as their proxy for it. Yuri, normally, in the original context, just treats them as human beings with ebb and flow in all of their emotions and situations. Things aren't black and white - humans are complex - and that is not the point of view that I feel we're given by way of dub Yuri. We're given a man who is constantly using anger in his voice toward imperial figures even when it's completely unwarranted, and even when he knows the people in question.

Other Stuff:

Assorted things are different mainly because of the acting, but Raven's goofiness got toned way down and Karol screams much... quieter, I guess you could say. They're both more lively in general though than how they were in the dub, so that's a plus from me too.

Rita is significantly softer with Estelle in JP, and she also is much more noticeably devastated about Raven's "death" and more panicked for Karol at Zopheir. I do love Michelle Ruff's portrayal and don't know that I truly have a preference, but I think a lot of Rita's emotional barrier breaking is truly expressed more in JP.

You know I gotta bring it up: Yuri and Flynn's relationship was kind of a mess in the dub. It gives the impression of Yuri being angry a lot more often than he ever actually is, and gives off the impression that we're supposed to dislike Flynn more than we're supposed to like him. Flynn isn't someone we're supposed to actively dislike, but the portrayal of him as expressed through dub Yuri does not come off as "we're supposed to like or root for this guy", when they're much closer than that in JP.

So yeah. The bulk of this is that Yuri is just not the same person to me between versions. Also, Vesperia has way more content in Japan (drama CDs galore frankly, and Yuri is still insanely popular in Japan and is thus a frequent character alt release in the gacha games and so has tons of voice lines and general story content, there's new merch of him every year because they make merch for the characters that have their voice actors showing up to TalesFes, etc).

There's much more ease in seeing JP Yuri's personality through all of it. I think it may be more difficult for people who don't understand Japanese or any Japanese at all, and that's such a shame to me because all those people get otherwise, without anyone posting about JP Yuri, is this... weird shell of Yuri that I sometimes even hesitate to call a shell because he just feels completely different to me.

Anyway uh I love Yuri (and Flynn) and that was the point of all this, but uh... if you made it this far thank you bunches and I hope people who maybe didn't like Yuri and/or Flynn who only knew the dub will change their perspectives. 🙇‍♀️

Side update:

People have since been saying Troy was partially responsible for dub Yuri's attitude and it's the same information across people- that he had more freedom to do what he wanted with the portrayal. On that note, I feel like I'd heard this before some time back, but I couldn't remember where or if I was remembering wrong... but with this stuff in mind, I guess not. There's also the fact that, as mentioned in a reblog I've done, I've read something where he claimed he was "paying homage" to Toriumi's portrayal (to which he apparently didn't drop Toriumi's name, making me believe he did not even know it, which is honestly disrespectful imo, and I'm hoping that was a matter of the people interviewing him condensing what he said, but I can't be certain).

As I mentioned for this situation, Vesperia was the first Tales game to be released in the west at the same time as the JP release (or in this case very shortly after). Higuchi said the localization team was not in contact with the JP team. This means Troy could not have known what Toriumi's portrayal was and nor was there time to study it, as the game was released in both regions in close proximity. By the time the JP release happened, the acting on the English release would've been long finished.

This would mean Troy lied for PR and tried to make it sound good, possibly aware people would be impressed/appreciative, which is not only a lie, but is honestly an insult imo to Toriumi's work when the portrayals are nothing alike and he's implying he was inspired by Toriumi's work (despite them being nothing alike becoming obvious with audio alone). This also gives people the wrong idea because generally people would want to take that at his word and not immediately think it's not true.

Previously, I was willing to give Troy the benefit of the doubt that he didn't have too much influence on the dub versions' behavior, and that was also the case at the time I made these posts. However, between the interview with him lying about paying homage to a voice actor he apparently can't even name, and that he had influence on the direction of Yuri's tone despite that Yuri's tone already existed, I'm not interested in pretending he had nothing to do with it.

That said, I take back anything I may have said at any point about Troy not being reflected in my criticisms. Yes, I have been told "maybe they didn't have the audio though", and maybe they did. I don't know*.

*(update on this, I actually suspect they DID have the audio, because the earliest parts of the game in Zaphias seem like they were trying to actually imitate the tone of voice originally, and then just yeeted that our the window later. Basically, there are a handful of parts I've noticed in the beginning of the game that the tone of voice is way too close to have been a coincidence in those exact spots if they simply didn't have the audio. That would mean, in this situation, they were fully aware of Yuri's tone throughout the game and actively chose not to reflect that in the dub.)

But I do know the localization team is still largely at fault (again, regardless of who made the decision, because it wasn't necessarily the translators themselves. This refers to whoever made the decision) here because someone made the knowing decision to outright change Yuri's dialogue (when again, other stuff was accurate. This was intentional). And again, for whatever reason, they weren't in contact with the original team, and yes, Higuchi was pretty bummed about that.

Yes, I recognize this was many years ago and maybe Troy wouldn't do that again. However, in this particular situation, I do need to recognize that he did have some sway in how Yuri behaved in the dub, and I am certainly not happy that he lied about paying homage, which becomes very obvious just with audio alone, but given Higuchi's statement, well... suffice to say I'm not happy with what he did. I could've gotten past him having more freedom with the acting if that wasn't coupled with the homage comment, but... yeah. I personally can't really look past it.

Do I hate the guy? No, and I recognize this was well over a decade ago. I'm just very aggravated that this happened at all and I can't say he didn't have a hand in it because he did.

And before anyone wants to cry "she hates localizations!", no, I don't. There's a reason I point to Graces when I talk about localizations. I appreciate good and faithful localizations. To me, Yuri is not by any means a good or faithful localization. Believe me, I used to have nostalgia goggles on too. They were strong. I used to really love Troy's performance too. Those nostalgia goggles came off when I started to realize, well, everything (this is also not a dunk on the other actors. I have some gripes with Flynn's VA's comments about Flynn, but otherwise, this stuff really doesn't extend to the other actors). There are also very few localizations I get this deep into this sort of thing with, and some I would even defend.

Anyway! Again! For real this time! Thanks for reading! I do honestly appreciate it and your interest!

[seaofreverie]

First day back at the university and I still suck at this exactly as much as I did 4 years ago

[musical-chick-13]

The problem is that, ultimately, I need to just. TALK to someone about The Thing™. But it has to be someone who understands. And like. No one does.

[talkorsomething]

want to cut my hair again like you wouldn't believe. What are the possible consequences of going bald

[actuallyvady]

me: having unmedicated ADHD makes it impossible to function

also me: *doing homework for my video game hobby*

[fortes-fortuna-iogurtum]

(btw if this semester for me was to be titled like a YA novel, it would be something like "The Year I Accidentally Became a Stoic and Also Channeled St. Augustine")

[pigeonperch]

Sits down

[thedevotionaltour]

man. thinking about how my insurance is out of network i feel so fucked i have so much money owed in therapy bills. literally over 1k bc of my weird insurance happenings and also bc idk if insurance was even doing its thing before i dont know and just other various things im sure i've forgotten. man.

[administer-distractions]

.

[simonghostrileys]

.

[dragons-and-yellow-roses]

I start a new job in a couple weeks that will require me to wake up at 6:30am. Am I preparing for that? Am I steadily going to sleep earlier and waking up earlier so that this transition is smooth?

It's 2:15am and I didn't sleep sooner because I was cross stitching and watching Dimension 20. I'll let you guess how well the preparing is going.

[voulezloux]

.