#i hate everything and i hate my life and myself and i have no luck at anything whatsoever

[inkskinned]

the thing about art is that it was always supposed to be about us, about the human-ness of us, the impossible and beautiful reality that we (for centuries) have stood still, transfixed by music. that we can close our eyes and cry about the same book passage; the events of which aren't real and never happened. theatre in shakespeare's time was as real as it is now; we all laugh at the same cue (pursued by bear), separated hundreds of years apart.

three years ago my housemates were jamming outdoors, just messing around with their instruments, mostly just making noise. our neighbors - shy, cautious, a little sheepish - sat down and started playing. i don't really know how it happened; i was somehow in charge of dancing, barefoot and laughing - but i looked up, and our yard was full of people. kids stacked on the shoulders of parents. old couples holding hands. someone had brought sidewalk chalk; our front walk became a riot of color. someone ran in with a flute and played the most astounding solo i've ever heard in my life, upright and wiggling, skipping as she did so. she only paused because the violin player was kicking his heels up and she was laughing too hard to continue.

two weeks ago my friend and i met in the basement of her apartment complex so she could work out a piece of choreography. we have a language barrier - i'm not as good at ASL as i'd like to be (i'm still learning!) so we communicate mostly through the notes app and this strange secret language of dancers - we have the same movement vocabulary. the two of us cracking jokes at each other, giggling. there were kids in the basement too, who had been playing soccer until we took up the far corner of the room. one by one they made their slow way over like feral cats - they laid down, belly-flat against the floor, just watching. my friend and i were not in tutus - we were in slouchy shirts and leggings and socks. nothing fancy. but when i asked the kids would you like to dance too? they were immediately on their feet and spinning. i love when people dance with abandon, the wild and leggy fervor of childhood. i think it is gorgeous.

their adults showed up eventually, and a few of them said hey, let's not bother the nice ladies. but they weren't bothering us, they were just having fun - so. a few of the adults started dancing awkwardly along, and then most of the adults. someone brought down a better sound system. someone opened a watermelon and started handing out slices. it was 8 PM on a tuesday and nothing about that day was particularly special; we might as well party.

one time i hosted a free "paint along party" and about 20 adults worked quietly while i taught them how to paint nessie. one time i taught community dance classes and so many people showed up we had to move the whole thing outside. we used chairs and coatracks to balance. one time i showed up to a random band playing in a random location, and the whole thing got packed so quickly we had to open every door and window in the place.

i don't think i can tell you how much people want to be making art and engaging with art. they want to, desperately. so many people would be stunning artists, but they are lied to and told from a very young age that art only matters if it is planned, purposeful, beautiful. that if you have an idea, you need to be able to express it perfectly. this is not true. you don't get only 1 chance to communicate. you can spend a lifetime trying to display exactly 1 thing you can never quite language. you can just express the "!!??!!!"-ing-ness of being alive; that is something none of us really have a full grasp on creating. and even when we can't make what we want - god, it feels fucking good to try. and even just enjoying other artists - art inherently rewards the act of participating.

i wasn't raised wealthy. whenever i make a post about art, someone inevitably says something along the lines of well some of us aren't that lucky. i am not lucky; i am dedicated. i have a chronic condition, my hands are constantly in pain. i am not neurotypical, nor was i raised safe. i worked 5-7 jobs while some of these memories happened. i chose art because it mattered to me more than anything on this fucking planet - i would work 80 hours a week just so i could afford to write in 3 of them.

and i am still telling you - if you are called to make art, you are called to the part of you that is human. you do not have to be good at it. you do not have to have enormous amounts of privilege. you can just... give yourself permission. you can just say i'm going to make something now and then - go out and make it. raquel it won't be good though that is okay, i don't make good things every time either. besides. who decides what good even is?

you weren't called to make something because you wanted it to be good, you were called to make something because it is a basic instinct. you were taught to judge its worth and over-value perfection. you are doing something impossible. a god's ability: from nothing springs creation.

a few months ago i found a piece of sidewalk chalk and started drawing. within an hour i had somehow collected a small classroom of young children. their adults often brought their own chalk. i looked up and about fifteen families had joined me from around the block. we drew scrangly unicorns and messed up flowers and one girl asked me to draw charizard. i am not good at drawing. i basically drew an orb with wings. you would have thought i drew her the mona lisa. she dragged her mother over and pointed and said look! look what she drew for me and, in the moment, i admit i flinched (sorry, i don't -). but the mother just grinned at me. he's beautiful. and then she sat down and started drawing.

someone took a picture of it. it was in the local newspaper. the summary underneath said joyful and spontaneous artwork from local artists springs up in public gallery. in the picture, a little girl covered in chalk dust has her head thrown back, delighted. laughing.

[selfinflictedgunshotwound]

sorry for only saying this type of shit lately but i kinda wanna drive a car straight into a brick wall at the highest speed possible

[simonghostrileys]

.

[aforgottennotebook]

✖️

[trashbaget]

*

[stayevildarling]

I adore your writing!! If you take requests, could I request the following for female reader x Wanda x Natasha. Where Natasha and Wanda have been in love with reader for the longest time and absolutely but secretly hate the fact she is in a relationship with someone. Unbeknownst to them, the relationship is toxic and reader suffers but doesn't say anything until maybe one day on a mission they find out? I adore your mental health fics. maybe bit of everything? angst/fluff/smut???? tysm

Natasha Romanoff x Wanda Maximoff x Reader- Good Luck, Babe

A/N: First of all I want to thank you dear anon for this request. I'm a sucker for fics like this. Secondly, I apologise for other projects on hold like ,,Fragments of us'' Part two. Right now, I don't have a lot of motivation or time to write but this intrigued me. Title inspired by the song ,,Good Luck, Babe!'' by Chappell Roan.

tw/tags: female reader, established relationship Wanda + Natasha, mention of abusive partner, mention of physical abuse, mention of verbal + emotional abuse, mention of bruises/cuts, mention of violence, cursing, mention of poly relationship, angry wandanat, slight nsfw mentions

word count: 10k (I apologize for my previous post regarding this, my draft messed up and I ended up counting the fic twice)

translation: detka= baby, malishka= baby girl

taglist: (if you want to be added comment/sent an ask or dm)

@lunaticwhittaker, @billiebeanhoward, @lanawinters-ily, @kenzbro, @minaslittleone, @httpfiftyshadesofgay, @whitelotus00, @ninaahs, @vintagepaulson, @isle-of-earle, @paulsonsratched, @stepintomyworld, @grilledcheeseandguavajelly, @lucyintheskywithxanax, @fanfics4world, @mymiraclewitch, @hazard-to-myself, @awritersometime, @ohrwurm26, @wastdstime, @p1pecleanerwitheyes

The Avengers compound had been unusually quiet this morning, the rain tapping gently against the large windows, creating a soothing rhythm that contrasts with the usual hustle. Outside said large windows, the world is wrapped in a soft haze, the greenery of the compound blurred by the pouring rain. The air inside feels cooler this morning, causing Natasha to shiver slightly, before the scent mixes with the faint aroma of coffee.

In the meantime, Wanda stands by the stove in the kitchen, her movements flowing freely as she prepares breakfast. The soft clinking of utensils, one of the few sounds breaking the silence. Usually, mornings after Tony's birthday parties would be filled with the sounds of laughter, groans from those suffering from hangovers and the general buzzing from the team slowly coming back to life. However, today it was different. Natasha sits at the kitchen island, a steaming cup of coffee in her hands.

Her green eyes fixed on the rain outside, lost in her thoughts. Her posture is tense, shoulders slightly hunched and her usual confident demeanour seemingly distant. Even her hair, still damp from the shower she had, falls in loose waves around her face. Wanda, ever the observant girlfriend, notices of course. Having noticed, as soon as she found Natasha this morning, sitting absentmindedly on the sofa of their shared apartment within the compound, before she headed for a shower, barely any words exchanged yet.

Usually, the two of them had a different routine on mornings like this with no mission to prepare for. Natasha would shower first and then Wanda would join her in the kitchen, where Natasha would tease her about her cooking and baking, despite loving it deeply. But today, there was no teasing, no light conversation, no glances filled with love, no warm arms wrapping around the redheads. Just silence and the occassional sounds of rain and clattering from Wanda's cooking.

As the Scarlet Witch flips a pancake, she glances over at Natasha again, her concern deepening with each moment passing. The redhead's face is a careful mask, but Wanda could sense the tension beneath it, her magic not needed as her love for the Black Widow was enough as she had been with her for years and knew her better than anyone. Natasha's fingers tap rhythmically on the side of her mug of coffee, a rare sign of agitation.

Setting down the spatula, Wanda moves closer as her elbows rest on the kitchen counter, her eyes observing Natasha a little closer. ,,Are you okay darling?'' she asks softly, her voice cutting through the silence.

In response she blinks, as if coming out of a daze, looking at her girlfriend. For a moment she seems conflicted, ready to flash one of her practiced smiles and assure her girlfriend that she is absolutely fine and just thinking about a mission or what to do at the gym later. But then she sighs, her shoulders slumping slightly. ,,I don't know'' she admits, her voice unusually soft and small. She looks back at the window, the grey reflecting in her eyes. ,,Just thinking'' she acknowledges, her walls right where they usually would be, before Wanda would break through them gently.

,,Are you thinking about last night by chance?'' Wanda whispers, reaching out to place her hand on Natasha's arm in a comforting manner. The redheads head snaps towards her partner, both feeling caught and at the same time wondering how Wanda would have known. ,,How-?'' she snaps a little, worried that maybe the witch had used her powers on her girlfriend as reading minds certainly was one of them. If she was thinking straight, the avenger would know that Wanda would never do that, respecting Natasha's privacy always and rather giving her time and space rather than using her magic to force any truths out of her partner.

,,Detka, I know you'' she assures, her eyes searching her girlfriends. Natasha sighs, feeling bad for even thinking that Wanda would have invaded her thoughts like that and at the same time sighing, knowing she would have some explaining to do. ,,This is about Y/N, isn't it love?'' Wanda asks softly, using her magic to turn off the stove as the pancakes were done at this point and wanting to stay close to her girlfriend in order to comfort whatever was troubling her mind. Natasha sighs, as Wanda as usually had figured out exactly what was troubling her and indeed it had been you.

The relationship between the two of them and you had always been a little strange. Natasha and Yelena rescuing you and your memories years ago from the red room and the people having done the same horrible things to you than the Russian and her sister. They took you in, introducing you to the avengers as you really had no home, no family, yet your skills had been impressive. And quickly, the avengers had become your home, giving you shelter at the compound to get back on your feet, Yelena quickly becoming one of your best friends and Natasha equally close to you, wanting to save the last bit of your soul as she had instantly felt something, as soon as laying eyes upon you for the first time, you had been different and she could tell, even back then.

At the time, both Natasha and Wanda had more of a fling, hands always lingering somewhere on each other, glances shared in meetings, secret meetings and hook ups at night as they couldn't quite keep their hands away from each other. Both of them took you under their wing, helping you train some younger recruits in order to give you something to do, support you emotionally, making sure you could thrive again after suffering abuse and torture for several years. And you blossomed in a way that Tony and the others quickly realised you could be an asset to them, offering to send you on your first mission. And at that time both Wanda and Natasha had grown so close to you that they objected, not liking the thought of you in danger again and worrying about your health and mental state and how the mission may affect you.

In the end they insisted on accompanying you and watched in awe as you succeeded with your first mission, thriving with each day along the avengers. The three of you quickly become the golden trio, always seen together, either in the gym with Natasha, working out while blasting some music, the redhead teasing you for your right hook. Often seen with Wanda as she showed you some of her magic as it had you in awe. The three of you grew closer than the two of them ever had been before and over months their feelings for you grew. Natasha and Wanda pretty much realised at the same time, confiding in each other as they didn't want to ruin what they already had. When the same words spilled from their lips they couldn't help but laugh but the laughter quickly subsided as one of the recruits who you had been training often, seemed to have captured your heart.

They didn't notice the lingering glances, the gestures from her as she showered you in flowers, affection and gifts. As they had been too caught in their own feelings and how they could ever propose this idea to you, despite feeling pretty sure that you felt the same way, having seen your blushing whenever around them and the way you squirmed whenever their hands lingered on you somewhere or the pet names they had reserved for you specifically, flowed so freely from their mouths. It hit them hard when they found about you and Lucy, each of them handling the news in their own ways. Natasha made sure to background check her properly, using all of her spy skills, even searching her room one day, wanting to make sure she would treat you right. Wanda accepted it, your happiness her main priority and wanting to comfort Natasha in the process.

In the end that's how the two of them finally grew closer and closed the last gaps of privacy, making their fling more official and confessing their feelings. Ever since then, they had been the power couple of the Avengers. The two mothers as the others would often call them as they made sure to look after the others, often providing them with food after missions or advice and always a listening ear or Wanda's magic nearby whenever anyone needed it. But despite the months passing, slowly even a year of your relationship with Lucy approaching, they still hadn't forgotten about you and their feelings certainly never subsided. They respected your relationship of course and the fact you couldn't spent as much time as before but they always made sure to fit some conversation or at least one pizza or move night into a week, wanting to make sure you are well taken care of and they could still have you around.

,,Yeah'' Natasha admits, stopping her daydreaming about you, before she reminisces about the previous night and how Lucy had been all over you, dragging you onto the dance floor when you clearly looked tired after the previous mission. How you often wanted to come over and chat with them but she dragged you into another corner, crashing her lips onto you, making Natasha almost rage in jealousy and wanting nothing more than to pry you away from her. Natasha had been worried, whether this relationship was truly making you happy as you had never mentioned Lucy to them before and how they found out through Thor and some of the other guys chatting back then. How they often found you alone when Lucy was out with some of the other recruits from her missions and team, leaving you alone as they went clubbing and drinking, Natasha inspecting Lucy's social media closely. How she never seemed to post photos of you, never showing you off the way she certainly would. How she hadn't showered you in gifts for ages, something Natasha would certainly also do as you deserved flowers every single day if it was up to the Russian.

,,Don't you think it's time to let that go darling?'' Wanda asks softly, knowing her lover had struggled for almost a year with her feelings and the jealousy so evident on the Black Widows features whenever the two of you are around. Of course the Scarlet witch hated it equally, ultimately agreeing that her and Natasha could certainly treat you better but you seem happy and your happiness is all that matters to the redhead. ,,I know I should but-'' the redhead hesitates then, not knowing how to finish that sentence as her feelings both confused and overwhelmed her at the same time. ,,I just have this feeling that she's not happy that.. we could have-'' she begins but Wanda cuts her off, finishing her sentence. ,,Could have treated her better?''. Natasha nods, sighing again as her shoulders slump further, Wanda smiling sadly at her partner and hating how much this was hurting her.

,,Am I not enough for you?'' Wanda suddenly questions, completely catching Natasha off guard as she sits up straight, her face almost crumbling at the question. ,,Darling'' she sighs, feeling bad instantly before noticing the slight smirk on her partners face. ,,You're perfect detka'' she reassures, kissing the tip of her nose. ,,How about you show me just how enough I am for you'' Wanda teases, knowing she couldn't fix this and some distracting was in order. ,,Certainly but pancakes after?'' Natasha smiles before lifting up her partner, Wanda's legs wrapping around her as she carries her to the bedroom, the witch giggling on her way over as Natasha plants kisses along her neck. Wanda nods through her hitched breathing.

----

Today had been another slow day, the rain had woken you a while ago, as well as a pounding headache, causing you to groan as soon as you tried to open your eyes but failed due to the pounding pain. Somehow, you managed to stumble your way into the kitchen of your shared room with Lucy, reaching for some water and painkillers before sitting in silence for what seemed like hours until the headache was bearable enough to move again. Last night seemed a blur, the only memory left the fact it was Tony's birthday and at some point remembering his speech but then everything blurred. As you glance at your phone, you realise the upcoming meeting for the mission tomorrow in the afternoon and you knew you should get some exercise in at some point as you skipped yesterday due to the party and helping Pepper with the preparations.

After throwing on some leggings and an oversized hoodie, you grab some Gatorade from the fridge and make your way over to the gym, sincerly hoping that no one would be in there as you certainly didn't feel like conversation today. You didn't feel right today, besides from the headache and you really couldn't tell what was wrong, feeling both dizzy and fatigued and as if someone had repeatedly beat you with Thor's hammer. You sigh in relief finding the gym empty, putting on your headphones and blasting some music before starting on some cardio, knowing the upcoming mission would probably include some running, wanting to do some weights afterwards before showering and getting ready for the meeting in the afternoon. The rain continues pattering as your thoughts are blended out by the sound of music and focusing on your training, wanting to be fit and ready for tomorrow.

In your daze you never realised Wanda and Natasha entering about an hour later, watching you with amused smirks, as they watch you from behind lifting some weights, not having seen your features but recognising that oversized hoodie from anywhere as Natasha had given it to you after you came home with them, barely any clothes with you and how you had kept it since. They had tried to greet you but the music from your headphones had been so loud that they could hear it from the other side of the room and Wanda took a mental note of the songs, how they were so slow and sad, unlike the usual things you would listen to, wanting to adress that at some point. It's not until you take your headphones off, having finished your workout for today, grabbing the bottle and almost chugging it, suddenly feeling the same fatigue and dizziness again, when you notice their presence.

,,Hi detka'' Natasha and Wanda greet you with bright smiles and you breathe a second before turning around with a smile. Instantly their smiles drop slightly as they notice how pale you are. ,,Are you alright, sweetheart?'' Wanda asks concerned, walking over to get a better look at you. ,,Fine, just tired Wands'' you reassure but that certainly wasn't enough for the redhead witch, as she approaches you, cupping your cheeks and checking for any sign of a temperature. ,,Wanda I just worked out, I'm fine'' you reassure and Natasha can't help but giggle at your antics. ,,Stubborn just like me'' she huffs before grabbing some weights and beginning her own workout. ,,How have you been darling? we haven't seen you much lately'' Wanda asks as her eyes search yours. She instantly notices the hesitation before you speak and the concern is evident in her orbs. ,,I've been good, just busy with missions you know'' you assure and she nods, knowing you had been sent on plenty of them lately.

,,If you ever need us to tell Tony to back off a little, you know where to find us'' Natasha offers with a wink but you know she means every word as they always took care of your needs. For a moment your brave smile fades as your reality catches up with you and you have to fight the tears away, and they notice of course but before either of them can speak, the three of you are interrupted as a presence stops by the door. ,,Y/N, you coming?'' Lucy asks and you smile before reaching for your things ,,Of course'' you nod, smiling at both Wanda and Natasha before following your girlfriend. ,,Bye guys'' you part them with almost a sad smile as Lucy reaches for your hand, dragging you away from them. The two of them remain quiet, Natasha drowning her raging jealousy in her workout and Wanda lost deeply in her thoughts as today she had for the first time seen what Natasha had mentioned, the sadness in your eyes, the feeling that something wasn't quite right, despite her not being able to point it out exactly.

As the elevator doors close, Lucy's grip tightens on your hand. "I told you I don't like them," she hisses. You roll your eyes inwardly, too tired to argue. The familiar ache in your head and the exhaustion in your bones keep you silent, dreading the confrontation that awaited in your room.

Your relationship with Lucy had started beautifully. She'd been sweet and caring, helping you through nightmares, showering you with affection, and making you forget the Red Room's horrors. But then things changed—her patience waned, arguments became frequent, and eventually, she became physical with you. You blamed her stress, even yourself, for provoking her.

Now, you just endured it. You had become an expert at hiding the bruises, adjusting your uniform to conceal them. The shame of being an Avenger, unable to stand up to your girlfriend, weighed heavily on you. You longed for someone who treated you kindly, like Wanda and Natasha. But you believed you had missed your chance with them, seeing them so happy together. Lucy had convinced you that no one else would want you, and you believed it, accepting your fate.

And you had been exceptional at hiding your true feelings, the lonely nights when Lucy went out partying, the nights after arguments, covering your body in order for no one to see. And so you carried on each day, your head held high as if nothing happened, carrying on with your duties and your life, accepting your ultimate fate as you had a play in it surely.

At the meeting that afternoon, you entered the briefing room feeling every bruise and ache Lucy had left on you. Last night had been particularly rough, and her anger had found its usual target you. Despite your best efforts to hide the signs, you felt utterly drained, the weight of everything pressing down on you. Your goal was simple to get through the meeting without drawing attention.

As you take a seat, you immediately notice both Wanda and Natasha watching you from across the room. You tried to muster a convincing smile but somehow the exhaustion must show. Natasha's eyes narrow slightly, Wanda's brow furrowed in concern. They exchange a glance, clearly picking up that something was off and bothering you. Throughout the meeting, you could feel their eyes on you while Tony was going on about mission details but somehow you struggled to focus. ,,You're nothing, worthless'' the words of Lucy replay in your mind. You nod along, taking notes almost mechanically, just trying to keep up your apperance. It's when Tony asks for your input on a tactical point, there is a pause as you realize you really hadn't been listenting the way you should have.

,,Y/N?'' Tony prompts and thats when you snap back to the present, stammering a response that you hope was good enough to answer his question. Wanda's eyes are practically boring into you, her concern deepening by the minute as she senses your unease. After the meeting finishes, you hurry and gather your things, hoping to slip away before anyone could corner you. But Natasha was quicker of course, intercepting you at the door.

,,Hey, you alright?'' she asks, her voice casual but her eyes serious. All you can do is nod, forcing a smile. ,,Yeah, just tired'' you say, hating how weak your voice sounds right now. Natasha doesn't seem convinced, but she doesn't press the subject further, just nodding slowly.

Wanda, however had always been more direct. As you step into the hallway, she catches up with you, her expression filled with concern. ,,Can we talk?'' she asks, her tone gentle but insistent. You sigh, feeling cornered but too exhausted to resist. ,,Sure'' you mutter, following them both to a quieter area. Natasha joins, leaning against the wall with her arms crossed.

,,Y/N darling'' she begins, the sound of her voice causing your heart to swell. ,,You don't seem like yourself. What's going on?'' she asks softly. You hesitate, your instinct to hide the truth clashing with the need of finally letting someone in. Natasha's gaze is boring right into you, making it clear they are serious about this and not about to let this slide.

,,It's nothing, I'm just tired and.. had a long night'' you admit weakly, avoiding their eyes. Wanda's hand reaches out, gently touching your arm. It takes every last bit of you not to flinch, not having felt their gentle hands in so long and the gesture almost causing you to cry as you had longed for gentle hands rather than rough ones.

,,We are worried about you'' she says. ,,You can talk to us, We have noticed you have been different lately detka'' the witch tries again, feeling bad for pushing you but deeply concerned about you as your bright smile had vanished lately.

Natasha nods, her voice low and serious ,,We care about you Y/N, you don't have to do this alone, whatever it is''. Your facade and walls crack a little at their genuine concern. You feel a lump forming in your throat, the urge to break down overwhelming. You look at them, tears threatening to spill. You know you needed to give them something but then again you knew it couldn't be the truth.

,,It's.. complicated'' you finally admit, your voice barely above a whisper. Wanda squeezes your arm reassuringly. ,,Please know that we are here for you, always'' she encourages, knowing they had pushed enough know and at least wanting you to know that much.

Their words feel like some weight finally lifted off your shoulders, despite the chain of Lucy holding you down. You wanted to tell them everything but the fear keeps you silent. Yet, the warmth and concern in their eyes gives you a glimmer of hope and warmth. As the conversations lingers in the quiet corner, Wanda and Natasha exchange a knowing glance.

Natasha is the first to break the silence ,,What are you doing tonight?'' she asks, her voice casual but her eyes intent on you. You hesitate, unsure how to respond. ,,Nothing much.. I guess just rest'' you say, knowing that Lucy had plans with the others to go out drinking again. You had planned for a quiet night, mentally and physically preparing for the mission tomorrow. But you dreaded the nights alone, dreading the emptiness of the room you shared with her. Dreading her return and the comments she would make as soon as she would sway into the room.

Wanda smiles softly, an idea clealry forming between them. ,,How about a movie night? Just like the old days'' she suggests, a hint of nostalgia in her voice. ,,We could use some downtime and I think you could too'' Natasha adds, her eyes sparkling with excitement. You blink a few times, suprised by the offer. It had infact been long since the three of you had spent time together like that. The thought of a quiet evening with them, away from everything, seems incredibly exciting. You find yourself nodding before you even fully process it or the potential consquenzes of your agreeing.

,,That sounds nice'' you admit, feeling a little shy as a small but genuine smile creeps onto your face. Natasha grins, looking relieved. ,,Great, we'll pick up some snacks and meet in the common room around seven?'' she asks and you nod. Wanda smiles before leaning in closer ,,Now get some rest detka'' and you smile a little before parting ways with them.

The warmth of their invitaton eases some of the tension in your chest and on your tired shoulders. It feels like a small escape, a chance to reconnect with them and perhaps even feel like yourself again. Whenever you had spent time with them in the past, they made you feel seen, valid for your experiences in life and the way of your thinking. As you step back into your room, finding it empty, everything fades in the background a little, the anxiety and anticipation about tonight.

The exhaustion weighs heavily on you, both physically and mentally and before you can think about tonight any further, your eyes begin feeling heavy, sleep quickly catching up with your tired bones. When you wake next, the room is dimly lit by the late afternoon sun, the rain having subsided, casting soft shadows. You glance at the clock, realizing it's almost time for the movie night. Stretching, you feel a little more rested, though the dull ache still remains. You notice Lucy's absence for a moment and feel a pang of relief and guilt. She must have already left to meet the others for their night out. The silence of the room feels foreign but peaceful. You take a deep breath, hoping she wouldn't find out about tonight as she most certainly would be furious as soon as she found out.

After a quick shower to freshen up, you dress in comfortable lounge clouthes, trying to shake off the remaining sleep from your nap. You take a moment to look into the mirror, noticing the tiredness in your eyes but also a small flicker of something else, maybe hope or at least the anticipation of a night without stress. As you make your way to the common room, you find the atmosphere cozy and inviting. The lights are dimmed, a stack of movies awaiting your selection on the table. Natasha is sprawled out on one of the couches, flipping through the snack options, while Wanda arranges blankets and pillows, making everything comfortable for the three of you.

,,Hey! perfect timing'' Natasha greets you with a grin, motioning you to join them. ,,We've got snacks, drinks and a whole lot of movies, pick your poision'' she smirks and you can't help but blush a little, feeling right at home with them and as if no time had passed since last spending time with them.

,,Yeah we've got everything malishka, from cheesy rom-coms to action, whatever you're in the mood for''. Wanda smiles warmly at you as you join them both, positioning yourself in the middle as they had left a gap there for you.

You feel a genuine smile stretch across your face as you settle into the plush couch. It feels good to be around them, like slipping into an old beloved sweater. The tension of the day begins to melt away, replaced by the comforting presence of both women.

,,How about we start with this one'' you suggest, reaching for a bowl of popcorn. Wanda and Natasha nod in agreement and the three of you quickly fall into easy conversation, laughing and chatting as the first movie starts. For the first time in what feels like forever, you begin to relax, feeling the warmth and safety of their company wrap aorund you like a protective blanket. For the first time you didn't need to tense, worry about an argument coming, saying the wrong thing or upsetting someone. Simply being able to be yourself and be free from the usual anxiety sourrounding you.

The hours seem to fly by as the sunset quickly turns into darkness of the night, the only light source both the TV and some lights and candles in the corner of the room. The three of you laugh until your sides hurt at the ridicilounsess of one of Wanda's favorite rom-coms, finding joy in the over the top scenarios and cheese lines. It feels good to laugh freely with them. As the night wears on, the movie choices shift to horror. The mood in the room changes with the flickering shadows on the screen and you find yourself jumping at sudden scares. Natasha's teasing doesn't stop as she finds you and Wanda basically jumping into each other's arms. ,,Badass Avenger and the Scarlet Witch hm?'' she smirks, causing you both to side eye her.

Eventually, the adrenaline fades, replaced by a warm, sleepy comfort. The room is filled with the glow of the television and the quiet hum of its background noises. You find yourself leaning into Natasha, her shoulder a steady and comforting presence. The exhaustion of the day, combined with your own rollercoaster of emotions, finally catches up with you. Your eyelids growing heavy and before you know it, you drift off, lulled to sleep by the warmth and safety of the moment.

Natasha had equally drifted off a little, smiling as she noticed you asleep on her shoulder and Wanda simply stares in adoration, having missed your presence with them both for the longest time. She lets herself relax, closing her eyes for a moment to enjoy the peace.

The peace is interrupted however, as soon as Lucy returns to your room from her night out. Both tipsy and irritated she finds your absence, sending a spike of anger through her alcohol fuzed daze. She clenches her jaw, before slamming the door behind her ,,JARVIS, where is Y/N?'' she screams. JARVIS responds in his usual calm tone ,,Miss Y/N is currently in the common room with Miss Romanoff and Miss Maximoff''.

Her anger reaches new levels as she stomps towards the common room, her footsteps echoing through the quiet halls. She's fuming, a mix of jealousy and drunken anger washing over her. As she reaches the door, she pushes it open with a loud bang, startling both you and Natasha awake. You blink, groggy and disorientated for a momnent, struggling to understand what is happening. The peaceful atmosphere shatters as Lucy stands there, her face filled with anger and confusion.

,,What the hell is going on here?'' she slurs, her voice thick with the alcohol she had consumed. Her eyes are wild, darting between the three of you. You feel a cold knot of dread forming in your stomach, feeling terribly guilty for not having told her as you knew from the start she wouldn't have approved this.

Natasha's arm, still around you from before, tenses and Wanda quickly stands, stepping slightly forward, her expression calm but her eyes alert. ,,Lucy'' you say, your voice thick with sleep and confusion. ,,What are you doing here?'' you try to keep your voice steady but the sight of her sends more waves of anxiety crashing over you.

Your girlfriend ignores your question, her gaze fixed on both women in the room with you, her lips curling in disapproval. ,,So this is what you're doing? Cozying up with them while I'm out?'' she spits, her words slurring. The accusation is clear and you feel embarassed as in all honesty she was right with every word.

,,We were just watching movies Lucy'' Natasha says, her voice steady and controlled. She stays seated but her posture is alert, ready to react if needed. ,,Nothing more''.

Wanda still stands beside the couch, looking at you with concern, then back at Lucy. ,,Y/N needed some time to relax. We invited her for a movie night'' the witch explains gently, trying to calm the tension in the room.

Lucy's eyes narrow, her jealousy reaching it's peaking point. ,,Oh is that it?'' she chuckles sarcastically. ,,Just a friendly little get together? Looked like more than that to me'' She takes a shaky step forward, her voice rising. ,,You think I don't see how they look at you? How you look at them?'

Your heart pounds at her words but you stand up, instinctively placing yourself between Lucy and the other two. ,,Lucy it's not like that. We were just hanging out like we used to'' you try to reason with her, wanting to simply be swallowed into the ground, feeling embarassed they both had to witness this.

Natasha stands up too, moving beside you, her presence protective. ,,Lucy calm down, you're drunk'' she says, her tone firm. ,,We don't want this to turn into a scene''.

Your girlfriend laughs bitterly, her eyes flashing with anger. ,,A scene? you think this is a scene? You don't even know what a scene is'' she points a finger at you, her voice harsh. ,,You're mine Y/N, I don't care what kind of night you had or hoped you had, you don't just ignore me and run off with them''.

,,You know what? You need to back off. Y/N has done nothing wrong'' Wanda suddenly speaks up, growing impatient with Lucy's behaviour.

,,Come on we are leaving'' she warns, ignoring Wanda's words as she tries pulling your arm. You feel a sting at her words, the weight of everything she implies. The usual shame and guilt washes over you and as you glance at the two of them, their worried and protective gazes, only cause you to feel worse. The pull of the situation is stronger than any urge to stay with them, fearing what would happen if you didn't comply with Lucy's request. As you stand there, the feeling of tension crackling in the air, Natasha suddenly reaches out and gently touches your arm, her voice soft but firm.

,,Y/N you don't have to go with her'' she offers, her green eyes locking onto yours with a seriousness that catches you off guard. For a moment you hesitate, the warmth and sincerity of their words a contrast to the cold anger coming from Lucy. The idea of staying and not having to face this night was tempting but again Lucy's grip on you was tighter than anything you had felt before.

As her glare intensifies, her hands clenched at her sides, the familiar fear and guilt builds up, overwhelming you for a moment. You swallow hard, looking down, uanble to meet the Black Widow's eyes any longer. ,,I should go'' you mumble, your voice barely above a whisper. The weight of the decision crushes you and you feel the string of tears threatening to spill over. Without another word, you nod, swallowing back the tears turning towards Lucy and following her out of the room. Natasha steps forward as if wanting to follow you but Wanda holds her back, knowing you had made your choice for tonight.

As you enter your shared room, you immediately head to bed, the tears flowing freely as Lucy barely looks at you, storming around, still mutterting angrily. Tonight you realize the reality of what you are stuck in, a reality you can‘t seem to escape from. Both Wanda and Natasha had been so kind, too kind perhaps. Maybe Lucy was right, maybe you didn‘t deserve anything, didn‘t deserve kindness and maybe you shouldn‘t have accepted their invitation, as you deep down knew this was coming.

You lay down, sobbing silently into your pillow, feeling the stinging in your heart. As Lucy eventually quietens and settles down, you feel utterly alone, despite her presence. You close your eyes, wanting nothing more than sleep to come and make you forget.

As you left with Lucy, the silence in the common room feels heavy. Wanda and Natasha stand there quietly, stunned, before the redheads sighs deeply. They clean up in silence, both lost in their thoughts. Once everything was tidy, the tension follows them back to their room. Natasha is the first to break the silence, her voice low and troubled. „I can‘t believe she just went with her“ she sighs, staring up at the ceiling. „Did you see the way Lucy was acting? I‘ve never seen her like that before, it‘s not normal“.

Wanda turns onto her side, facing her girlfriend. „Yeah I saw it“ she replies softly. „Lucy was drunk“ she states before silence follows. „But it was more than that, she was possessive and angry and it didn‘t seem right“. She hesitates, her eyes searching Natasha‘s. „Y/N looked scared Tasha, I have never seen her like that before“ Wanda acknowledges, finally understanding her lovers words from the other day and what Natasha had been implying all along.

Natasha sighs, turning her head to meet Wanda‘s gaze. „I know“ she says, her voice filled with guilt. „I should have done more, should have stopped her“. Wanda reaches out, taking her girlfriends hand into her own. „We did what we could love, besides Y/N was in a tough spot, you saw how Lucy reacted“.

Her girlfriends expression darkens, a protective instinct on her features. „Lucy is hurting her Wanda. Maybe not physically- I hope at least but emotionally. You saw how she flinched when Lucy yelled. That‘s not normal and Y/N doesn‘t deserve that“. Wanda nods in agreement, having seen the same things but not wanting to think too much about that as the thought killed her. Wanda squeezes Natasha‘s hand, nodding. „We‘ll figure it out but we have to be careful. Y/N has to want our help and right now she seems scared“.

Natasha‘s eyes flicker with frustration. „But we can‘t just sit by and do nothing“ she insists. „What if something happens?“. Wanda moves closer, her hand resting comfortingly on Natasha‘s cheek. „Then we step in darling“ she reassures and the redhead finds herself leaning into her girlfriends touch.

----

The next morning arrives much quicker than you anticipated, barely getting any sleep as Lucy's words and the night before had kept you awake most of the night. Tired and fatigued, you somehow got yourself ready for the upcoming mission, getting into your costume and chugging a Gaterode and munching on a protein bar as you make your way to the others. Lucy was still asleep when you left and you had considered waking her but from experiences in the past, she hated to be woken up so you simply accepted it and meet the others by the Quinjet.

Natasha and Wanda quickly greet you, alongside the other Avengers joining you on this mission. You greet them with a small smile, feeling both exhausted and embrassed about what happened the night prior and that they had to witness it. You hoped for a quick succesful mission, wanting nothing more than to get back into bed. You avoid the cockpit, strapping yourself into one of the seats and closing your eyes, missing the other's chatting and catching up with each other as you didn't feel like socizalising. They leave you be, especially the two redheads whos eyes seem to follow your every movement, knowing you probably needed some space after the night before and wanting to allow you to rest some more before arriving as you seemed exhausted.

The Quinjet moves through the sky with light speed, getting you to your destination quick and safely. As soon as you feel a hand on your shoulder, you flinch not expecting the sudden sensation. Wanda smiles warmly at you, ignoring how you reacted to her touch. ,,We're there sweetie'' she coos, frowning a little at seeing you in this state. ,,Are you sure you're up for this detka?'' Natasha asks carefully and you simply nod, rising to your feet and ignoring the dizzy spell as you walk into action with the others.

It was a usual mission, infiltatring a secret enemy hideout stashed with countless illegal and highly dangerous weapons. The mission had been going on for months and Tony finally found their biggest secret base, giving you all the tasks to both disable the weapons and bring in the people responsible. Both Thor and Steve make their way through towards the basement, Natasha, Wanda and you on your way to the labs in order to find the weapons. You dodge security cameras knowlingly, having done this plenty of times before. Natasha is quick to take out the occassional guard lingering somewhere or Wanda simply making them drop to the floor with her magic.

The three of you move in perfect synch, completing each other perfectly and in no time you manage to reach the weapons, hack into their computer database and follow your mission innotiative. After checking back in with the others, you make your way back to the main area, when suddenly you are caught by countless men carrying weapons and making your way back to the others more difficult than necessary. With all of your strength left, you fight them off along with the other two, doging their punches and shots and making them fly into the nearest wall.

It almost all carried out to plan when Thor and Steve alerted you they had what you needed and to get back to the Quinjet, the three of you glancing at each other before getting ready, when another wave of them came. You had been so preoccupied by the pain on your body and the dizziness slowly dragging you down that you slipped a little, stepping in front of Wanda and pushing her out of the way as a bullet came her way. And Wanda being Wanda she of course had it, her magic already glowing in her hands ready to dodge the bullet or simply make it fly back. Instead it graced your shoulder slightly, Natasha quick to make the last of them drop unconscious as they aid to your side.

,,Y/N are you okay?'' Wanda asks, her expression panicked as she sees the cut on your arm and the droplets of blood. ,,Yes it just graced me'' you reassure, signaling them both to get back to the others. They follow close behind you, meeting the others before Natasha takes the wheel, wanting to get back to the compound as quickly as possibly. Wanda sits you down, strapping you into your seat before giving you some water. ,,Wands I'm fine'' you reassure again but your pale expression and the shacking of your hands from holding the water bottle aren't exactly convincing the redhead. Natasha glances towards you both a few times, the concern rippling through her, despite knowing you are safe with her girlfriend.

,,Let me have a look'' she urges, pulling at your uniform but you pull away, knowing you couldn't let her see, not with the state your body was currently in. In the end the redhead accepts it, not budging from the seat beside you and keeping a close eye on you. You stare at the opposite seats which are empty, feeling foolish for your actions, knowing Wanda easily had that bullet and would have been safe. You don't know what washed over you, suddenly feeling the urge to protect them both, despite knowing they are much tougher and stronger than you are.

Almost defeated you make your way back into the compound, not remotely interested in the debriefing with Tony but Steve and Thor noticed, signaling to both redheads they had got it and they can take care of you instead. They follow you into the hallway before stopping you ,,Y/N Y/N wait'' they urge, not wanting to let you leave like this. ,,I said I'm fine'' you suddenly snap, your emotions and the heavy exhaustion betraying you and you simply storm off towards the elevator, leaving them both standing stunned in the hallway, accepting the distance you have put between them and worrying they had fussed too much.

As soon as you step into the elevator moments later, the exhaustion seems to drag you down whole. You barely manage to press a button before your knees give in, causing you to sink to the floor, your back leaning against the wall of the elevator. Wanda and Natasha barely make it back to their room when they suddenly hear JARVIS over the intercoms. ,,Miss Romanoff, Miss Maximoff'' he begins ,,It seems Miss Y/N is in need off assistance in the north elevator''. Their eyes meet for a bare second before they both jolt towards you.

JARVIS system works as quick as light, opening the elevator door and finding your exhausted frame on the floor. In seconds they both drop to their knees, taking your cheeks into their hands, their hearts beating faster at the sight of you like this. ,,Detka, can you hear me?'' Wanda tries and you nod weakly, concious but barely. ,,Okay let's get you to med bay'' Natasha urges, worried the bullet may have done more damage than you let on and they initially believed. ,,No.. no.. please no med bay'' you practically beg through your last energy and Wanda notices the panic in your voice and face, nodding towards Natasha before smiling reassuringly at you.

,,Okay sweetie, let's get you to our room instead hm?'' she offers and you nod weakly before they get you on your feet, each of them resting an arm on their shoulders and getting you towards their room. Natasha is quick to set you down on their sofa, running to the bathroom to grab the first aid kit as Wanda fetches you a sugary drink, hoping this was simply fatigue due to the mission and how exhausted you had been lately. She holds the bottle for you as you take slow sips, the blood slowly reaching your brain again and causing for the shacking of your hands to stop and the colour slowly fading back into your features.

,,Let's take this off and have a look'' Natasha urges and you knew then it was pointless. They would see now due to your own foolishness and without being able to hide it any longer, the tears flow freely, feeling both embarassed and weak for having them see. ,,Detka, are you in pain?'' Wanda asks concerned, seeing you so sad and flinching at Natasha's gently touches. You simply avoid answering her, closing your eyes and brazing for what is about to happen.

Natasha undoes the zips slowly before pulling your uniform off your shoulders, exposing you in a tank top. They instantly notice the beaten and bruised state of your body and their reaction is utterly different. Wanda shocked, the colour equally draining from her face, unable to yet comprehend what had happened. ,,Y/N?!'' she gasps ,,What happened, was this on a mission?''. You remain quiet, meeting Natasha's gaze who knew exactly where these came from. She remains silent herself, inspecting the wound on your shoulder from earlier, making sure to clean and wrap it up for you. She talks you through every step, when it may sting and when it wouldn't, silently asking for your permission and treating you with the gentlest touch in the world.

,,Wait'' Wanda suddenly mumbles as she realizes the extent of your stiutation and what you had been trapped in for almost a year now. ,,Please tell me this wasn't Lucy, malishka'' she urges but when you remain silent again, knowing you couldn't lie to them any longer her green eyes meet Natasha's, filled with tears. ,,I'm going to kill her'' the Black Widow hisses, abandoning the first aid kit before she gets ready to find Lucy. ,,No.. Natasha please..'' you beg, not wanting her to get caught up in this, not wanting her to fight your battles and do what you should have done a long time ago.

Your hands frantically reach for hers, terrified of her leaving and getting hurt by Lucy or her words. She stays, kneeling down in front of you before taking a glimpse at your tired eyes. ,,It's okay, I'm not leaving'' she reassures. ,,What can we do darling?'' she questions as her hands comfortably and reassuringly rest on your knees. ,,May I- stay with you two for a bit please?'' you ask and your voice sounds so broken due to your fear of them abandoning you that it breaks their heart. Natasha steps away for a moment, needing to get her own emotions at bay before she was going to loose it on your girlfriend. Wanda smiles, placing her hand on your cheek ,,What can I do, detka?'' she asks softly, wiping the tears from your cheeks with her thumbs.

,,How would you feel about a nice soothing bath?'' she offers and the sound of that truly sounds heavenly. You nod weakly, feeling bad you intruded on them like this but feeling safe and comfortable with them right now. ,,Let me just run it for you darling'' she assures and as she leaves you for a moment you watch Natasha, her back faced to you before the words spill out of you, barely audible but enough for the redhead to hear. ,,I'm sorry'' you whimper, instantly catching her attention as she turns around and walks over to you. Her eyebrows furrow as she takes a seat beside you ,,What are you sorry for?'' she asks sincerly.

,,For letting you both down, I know you taught me better than this but I didn't know what to do'' you hiccup. Her heart hurts at your statement, unable to form any words as she simply wraps her arms around you, holding you steady. ,,Never be sorry Y/N, this is not your fault'' she assures. Before you know it, Wanda guides you into their bathroom, a warm soothing bath already waiting for you. She had placed some warm towels near the sink for you, as well as one of her hoodies and leggins and some clean socks, knowing you wouldn't feel comfortable in your uniform. ,,Thank you Wands'' you mumble and for a moment there is a pause as the two of you look at each other.

,,Do you need any help? I can stay with you'' she offers but you feel self concious, not wanting her to see the full extend of your bruises, knowing they had only seen a couple so far and knowing the whole image would break them. ,,No thank you and thank you for this'' you smile at her and she nods, giving you the privacy you needed. ,,I'll just be out there, give me a shout if you need anything at all''. And with those words she leaves you, allowing you to undress yourself and soothe your bones in the bath that she had made for you. You instantly feel a little at ease, your muscles feeling less sore in an instant and you wonder whether Wanda had added more than just the bath bubbles she said she added for you, knowing her magic was strong.

When the Scarlet Witch returns to her girlfriend, Natasha sits on the sofa, both the rage and sadness written in her perfect features. Wanda sighs, not having expected this outcome but the pieces finally falling together and making sense after all. ,,I need to go and settle this Wands'' Natasha sighs, her knuckles turning white from the pure anger she is feeling in this moment. ,,I know my love but not like this'' she urges. ,,Help me fix us up some dinner and then we will figure this out together okay?'' the redhead suggests and Natasha nods, knowing her partner was right and if she so much as looked at Lucy right now, she wouldn't be able to control herself.

About half an hour, the two of them finish dinner, noticing you still aren't around and as their gazes meet, the worry is evident on their features. ,,I'll check on her'' Wanda announces. She knocks on the door a few times without success. Natasha follows, noticing the absence of your response. ,,Y/N darling'' Wanda tries again without success. In an instant Natasha opens the door, the two of them finding you asleep safe and soundly in the tub. Their hearts swell at the sight and Wanda is quick to fetch some of the warm towels, carefully scooping you up in her arms as you are knocked out cold. They dress and dry you with the most gentlest of touches, their eyes never prying.

After finishing, Natasha puts you to bed, tugging you in before Wanda suddenly storms off. ,,Where are you going?'' the Black Widow questions, having tried to ignore the state of your body so far and the new bruises and scars they had discovered. ,,Settling this'' Wanda hisses, her eyes glowing red with anger and Natasha lets her, knowing Lucy deserved every bit of Wanda's anger. The Scarlet Witch hurries through the corridor into the elevator, asking JARVIS where she could find Lucy.

Without a second thought she bursts through the door of your and Lucy's shared room, finding her with her back turned, looking out the window. ,,Where the hell have you been?'' she hisses, assuming it was you but when there is a lack of response she turns around, confusion washing over her as she finds Wanda instead. ,,What the hell are you doing here?'' she spits, seeing the red glowing of Wanda's hands. ,,You have exactly until tomorrow morning to leave this place and don't you ever try and return'' Wanda hisses, before storming into the bathroom and bedroom, collecting some of your things, ignoring Lucy's presence.

,,What are you rambling about? where is Y/N?'' she asks, following after the witch. ,,You will never see her again, never lay a single finger on her again'' Wanda warns, trying to hold back her magic, knowing one wrong move and it could wipe out her entire being from ever existing. ,,You have until tomorrow morning, if you aren't gone Natasha will surely have pleasure to see to it'' Wanda hisses as she collects some of your things from the bathroom. Before she can storm off, Lucy stands in her way, her angry eyes darting through Wanda. ,,She's a liar and a manipulator, I didn't do anything, not my fault she's been in love with you two for years'' she laughs bitterly, before Wanda pushes her aside, ignoring her comments and banging the door shut on her way out.

When Wanda returns, she finds you sitting with Natasha on the sofa, looking both comfortable and sleepy in her clothes. The redhead gently sets your things down and your questioning eyes find hers. ,,W- Wanda where were you?'' you stammer, fearing the worst. Wanda sighs deeply before kneeling in front of you ,,I have got some of your things darling, you'll stay with us tonight'' she assures. ,,By tomorrow morning Lucy will be gone and you won't ever have to see her again, she will never lay a hand on you again''. You find yourself in tears again at how protective they are, how they are putting your safety and needs first. ,,Tha- thank you'' is the only thing you manage to say before Wanda takes your hand and guides you to their dining table. ,,I'm sure you must be starving darling, lets eat something hm?'' she suggests and you nod at her offer, sitting between the two of them and enjoying the comfortable silence and occasional small talk.

During the remainder of the night, the two of them having you sandwiched and comfortable between them as you sit on the sofa watching a movie, you are lost in thought. Knowing this was for the best but somehow still reminsing the good times with Lucy, feeling bad you wouldn't get to talk to her yourself and be brave and find the courage to tell her exactly what you had been thinking yourself. Feeling bad to have her driven away from this place as she was good at her missions, belonged with the Avengers just like you did. And you didn't want to ruin it for her. Wanda and Natasha could tell you are lost in thoughts as you had been very quiet, not focusing on the movie much, missing some of the funny bits that has them both giggling or the jump scares, having them both jump.

In the end you let go off the thoughts, feeling so safe and comfortable with both of them that you simply fall asleep on Wanda's shoulder. They debated for a little bit how to do the sleeping situation as the couch wasn't nearly big enough for you three or even two people. And they worried leaving you here alone, knowing this was a lot to process. In the end, Natasha again took you in her strong safe arms, placing you in the middle of their big bed, both of them on either side of you, giving you some space but wanting you to not be alone incase you would wake up tonight and needed anything. And that night was the first night in a very long time where you had proper sleep. You had woken up at some point, confused by the strange surroundings until you found them next to you, sleepily and instictively crawling into their arms before falling asleep and not waking until late the next morning.

The two of them chuckled finding you in their arms, loving the feeling of holding you and knowing deep down that you belong with them, never with Lucy and never anyone else again. But they knew you needed time. Natasha and Wanda got up early, wanting nothing more than to stay beside you but knowing they had things to do. Wanda made sure to have a chat with Tony and the others, explaining the situation delicately and making sure they would take the three of you off missions for a little bit in order to let you and your body heal for a while. After she focused on making breakfast for the three of you, making sure to add some of your favorites, just like she remembered. Natasha in the meantime made sure Lucy was truly leaving, finding her with her bags packed in your room.

,,I hope you three will be very happy'' she spits and Natasha couldnt help but use her right hook on Lucy, a small portion of what she really meant to do to her. With a defeated ego, her bags and a broken nose she ended up leaving the compound, Natasha alerting JARVIS and security that she may never be seen on the premises again. The Black Widow made sure there are no reminders of her left in your room, if you wished to return.

By the time you wake up, finding the bed empty and the clock in their room showing it was past 10am you instantly rise to your feet, feeling panicked for sleeping in so long. Usually, you would have gotten told off for this by Lucy. You find both Wanda and Natasha in the kitchen, waiting for you with your favorite breakfast. ,,Good Morning Detka'' they greet you at the same time. Nervously, you take a seat, sipping some of the orange juice before meeting their gazes. ,,I'm sorry for sleeping so long'' you apologize and Wanda quickly chuckles and shakes her head. ,,Nonsense you were exhausted detka'' she assures. ,,How exactly did I end up in your bed?'' you ask a little shily and Natasha can't help but chuckle ,,You fell asleep on us and we took you to bed, we didn't want you alone in the livingroom'' she assures and you nod.

,,Is she gone?'' you ask after a while of eating breakfast with them in comfortable silence. ,,Yes she's gone'' Wanda assures and they see the tension leaving from your shoulders. The remainder of the day you spent with them as they take it slow with you, going on a walk in the afternoon, eating dinner with you and watching another movie with you in the evening. You felt at ease, knowing this was going to haunt you for a while to come but feeling safe with them. The routine of the prior night repeats as you fall asleep on them and they take you to bed, you not feeling comfortable with sleeping alone and the two of them liking your presence.

The weeks to follow had been filled with many ups and downs, days where you barely managed to get out of bed, days where you were full of energy before reality came crashing down on you. Natasha and Wanda had been with you every step of the way, getting your body and soul enough rest to heal from this. Eventually you moved back into your old room, feeling like intruding on them. You still ate with them, trained with them, eventually even joined them on missions again. You spent your days the way you always had before Lucy, right with them and where you belong. The nights had been lonely often, filled with nightmares or the inability to sleep at all. But slowly you started to heal, focusing on yourself again and slowly as the months passed both Wanda and Natasha seemed content, having you back and feeling like their sunshine was back again.

Your body had healed, the bruises and scars long gone now, the scars on your soul still lingering but fading with each day, with every moment of spending time with them, every soft gentle touch, every reminder that you are worth it. And in the end you started to believe it too, knowing your abilities and never wanting anything like this to ever happen again. It's not until one of Tony's birthday parties that your emotions get the better off you. It had almost been a year without her, a year without pain, without beatings, without feeling like you are worthless every minute of every day. But somehow tonight felt strange, despite having fun with Wanda and Natasha and getting ready with them, Wanda letting you borrow one of her dresses.

You somehow felt empty that night, eventually stealing away to one of the balconies, away from the crowds. Your heart had been feeling strange lately, a longing that you couldn't quite grasp. Each day your thoughts had been consumed by them, their touches on you, their words and how gentle they had been with you. And you felt sad, having missed your chance, longing for someone like them and despite liking your freedoom, also feeling incredibly lonely at night. For the past few days you had been more quiet and they had noticed of course, having tried to get the truth out of you but you didn't feel ready to tell either of them how you truly had been feeling.

,,Penny for your thoughts?'' Natasha interrupts the peace and as you turn around you find her in the black dress that complemented her features perfectly. Wanda is right beside her, the red dress matching the wine glass she is holding perfectly and you couldn't help but smile, seeing them so happy, so perfect for each other. ,,Hi there'' you greet them, feeling slightly tipsy from the amount of drinks you had been having in order to forget.

,,Enjoying the view?'' Wanda teases and you freeze for a moment until she looks at the sky filled with stars and the moon shining down brightly on the compound. ,,Yeah it's peaceful, I like it'' you admit and they both join you, before Natasha offers you to sit down on one of the large outdoor sofas. ,,What's been on your mind detka?'' she asks, having noticed and not wanting to worry anymore, simply wanting to get the all too familiar smile back she had been in love with for years.

,,I've just been thinking a lot lately'' you admit, staring at the now empty glass in your shaking hands. ,,What about love?'' Wanda asks carefully, tilting her head a little in order to catch a better glimpse of you. ,,About life, you know?'' you sigh and Natasha can't help but chuckle. ,,Come on detka, tell us'' she smiles warmly, enjoying the poetic side of you. ,,I just regret things you know? with Lucy and before and the choices I made'' you sigh. ,,I can't help but wonder what my future would have been like if I didn't-'' you stop yourself, not wanting to ruin what you had built with them by filling them in how you truly had been feeling.

Wanda and Natasha had talked a lot in the last few months, wanting to give you space and time to heal but having realized you belong with them. And they knew, it didn't take Natasha's spy skills or Wanda's magic to figure out that you felt the same way but they never wanted it to be too soon, never wanting to push you unil you were truly ready. But they could see the way you look at them holding hands, thinking about how your hand would fit in it so perfectly. Seeing their loving glances and how your heart equally beat for them, wanting to feel them on you, thinking about what their lips felt like on yours.

,,Didn't choose us over her?'' Natasha questions bluntly, knowing it was the right time to adress this tonight. Your eyes widen at her statement, before your gaze averts them, nodding before looking into the distance. Her statement surprised you as you never truly knew whether there was an us considering the two of them had always loved each other, long before you even joined them. ,,Tell us how you feel'' Wanda encourages, her green eyes staring right into your soul. ,,I can't'' you sigh, your heart beating out of your chest at this point. ,,Why?'' Natasha questions curiously, enjoying the sight of you squirming. ,,Because I don't want to ruin what we have'' you admit, tears filling your vision.

,,You could never darling'' Wanda assures and then it bursts out of you. ,,I wish I never got with her or even if I did I wish I would have stood up for myself, I feel lonely, my heart aches for...'' you still can't finish your sentence but Natasha is quite happy finishing it for you. ,,For us?'' she questions, a smirk playing on her lips and your eyes widen again at her bluntness. ,,Yes'' you admit, tears lingering in your eyes. ,,And I know you've got each other and would never feel the same but you just are so kind and perfect to me'' you admit.

This time Wanda breaks the silence, taking your hand into her own and abandoning the glass you had been holding. ,,Detka, we have been in love with you for years you know'' she admits and instantly your eyes snap towards her green ones. ,,Natasha hated every single day of you not being with us and we know it hasn't been easy for you lately, thats why we never said anything but you belong with us'' she admits and when you look at Natasha and see the sincerity in her eyes, you almost can't believe this is real and not one of your daydreams.

,,You.. you love me?'' you question, wanting to make sure you understood them right. ,,Yes silly, now the question is, do you love us?'' Natasha teases again and you can't help but blush under their gazes before nodding. ,,Good, I'm glad we finally talked about that'' she smiles before taking a sip from her drink. ,,Now whenever you are ready, we can have a conversation about this properly okay? but know you never have to be lonely again with us or scared, we will be there, we will take care of you because you belong with us'' Wanda confesses and you nod weakly, still feeling like you are in a daze.

,,Need a refill?'' Natasha offers and you chuckle a little reliefed before nodding. ,,Lets go then'' they suggest and you follow them as they take you to the bar. You end up dancing with them, drinking with them and giggling with them, finally feeling like you belong, still unable to believe any of this is real. After a while, you suddenly look at them both with an expression neither of them could read. ,,Nat?'' you mumble, not wanting anyone else to hear what you are about to say. ,,Yes detka?'' she asks, leaning in a little closer, her eyes piercing into your own and her lips so close to your own.

,,What if I'm ready now?'' you blurt out, feeling both the effects of the alcohol and the confession from before, mixed with adrenaline. ,,What?'' she asks confused, not understanding what you are implying. ,,You said to tell you when I'm ready, what if I'm ready for you both, right now?'' you ask again, this time much clearer and Natashas's eyes quickly meet Wanda's the lust in your own blending in with theirs. ,,Yes.. Yes I mean if you're sure'' she mumbles before you nod. ,,Then come on, we'll take good care of you'' Natasha offers and you take their hands into your own as they lead you away from the crowds towards their room, their hungry lips and hands already on you as soon as you step into the elevator and the door closes behind you.

And despite everything that had happened, you finally know you belong. With them, always.

[mcflymemes]

THE TORTURED POETS DEPARTMENT - THE ANTHOLOGY BY TAYLOR SWIFT PROMPT LIST *  assorted lyrics from the album, some lines slightly adapted for meme purposes but feel free to adjust as necessary

even if it's handcuffed, i'm leaving here with you.

trust me. i can handle a dangerous man.

i love you. it's ruining my life.

does it feel all right to not know me?

i am who i am 'cause you trained me.

quick. tell me something awful.

i loved you the way that you were.

we were just kids, babe.

i can fix him.

you and i go from one kiss to getting married.

you said i'm the love of your life.

way up there, i actually love it.

i just don't understand how you don't miss me.

do you hate me?

did you think i had it in me?

what if i told you i'm back?

i still miss the smoke.

i'm not trying to exaggerate, but i think i might die if it happened.

you look like stevie nicks.

it's hell on earth to be heavenly.

i still can't believe it.

this happens once every few lifetimes.

didn't you hear? they called it all off.

it's happening again.

my friends say it isn't right to be scared.

i might just die.

fuck you if i can't have us.

tell me about the first time you saw me.

are you gonna marry, kiss, or kill me?

no one's ever had me... not like you.

stay away from her.

there wouldn't be this if there hadn't been you.

i don't think you've changed much.

that's where i was when i lost it all.

life was always easier on you than it was on me.

i hoped you'd return.

do you believe me now?

what if your eyes looked up and met mine one more time?

what are the chances you'd be downtown?

is it something i did?

oh, we must stop meeting like this.

they say what doesn't kill you makes you aware.

i'm not a donor, but i'd give you my heart if you needed it.

looking backwards might be the only way to move forwards.

the story isn't mine anymore.

what a charming saturday!

none of it is changing.

wild winds are death to the candle.

one bad seed kills the garden.

i'm bitter, but i swear i'm fine.

this place made me feel worthless.

i didn't want to come down.

everything had been above board.

blood's thick, but nothing like a payroll.

you can mark my words that i said it first.

the professor said to write what you know.

all of this to say, i hope you're okay.

your words are still just ringing in my head.

i built a legacy which you can't undo.

who do i have to speak to to change the prophecy?

the effects were temporary.

no, i'm not coming to my senses.

babe, you gotta fake it 'til you make it.

you know you're good when you can even do it with a broken heart.

i guess a lesser woman would've lost hope.

thought of calling you, but you won't pick up.

you're a professional.

long may you reign.

you're an animal. you are bloodthirsty.

now i seem to be scared to go outside.

i don't believe in good luck.

i hate it here.

if i'd been there, i'd hate it.

only the gentle survived.

i'm lonely, but i'm good.

you have no room in your dreams for regrets.

i thought it was just goodbye for now.

are you still a mind reader?

let it once be me.

i haven't decided yet.

i still dream of him.

i'm so afraid i sealed my fate.

it was always the same searing pain.

i can't forgive the way you made me feel.

it wasn't a fair fight or a clean kill.

she used to say she wished that you were dead.

tell me all your secrets.

they tried to warn you about me.

you're in terrible danger.

i'm the life you chose.

yes, i'm haunted, but i'm feeling just fine.

no one asks any questions here.

tell me i'm despicable. say it's unforgivable.

i'm running back home to you.

you should see your faces.

you knew the price going in.

was any of it true?

who the fuck was that guy?

i don't ever want you back.

did you sleep with a gun underneath our bed?

you don't get to tell me you feel bad.

you wouldn't last an hour in the asylum where they raised me.

am i allowed to cry?

there's no such thing as bad thoughts. only your actions talk.

they're going to crucify me anyway.

i know i'm just repeating myself.

that's the closest i've come to my heart exploding.

[starrynights-sunnyskies]

as the flowers bloom, my heart does too ⋆*·ﾟmisa x putellas!femreader, social media au, (5/-)

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when your relationship ends and all you want to do is hide and cry, flowers suddenly start to appear on your doorstep.

or; misa hating to see a pretty girl cry and suffer and going out of her way to cheer her up while staying anonymous

fic: see my masterlist 🤍

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yourusername: feliz día de san valentín 💌 Liked by alexiaputellas, albaps9, bff3 and 3,927 others

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janafernandez3 I knew you were smiling more than usual lately!!!!

ingridengen Congrats, sweet girl! 😘

ona.battle Yaayy!

marialeonn16 Bambiiii, yes! 😭

salmaparalluelo Have the sweetest day!

bff3 At last 😉❤️

mikkykiemeney cuteee 🎀

marisabel_rguez Lucky girl! ↳ yourusername me or her? ↳ marisabel_rguez Uhh, trick question? liked by yourusername and 15 others

bff1 about timeeeee. i'm so happy for you 💃🤗

username1 the bracelet???? ↳ username2 THE M!! ↳ username3 the m! 😱 ↳ username1 who else do we know she hangs out with that starts with M that doesn't rhyme with visa? ↳ username4 mapi 🤣 ↳ username2 let's not pretend we don't know who it is lol

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Direct Messages marisabel_rguez Happy valentine's, mi querida. I've got a surprise for you. ↳ yourusername another one?? you spoil me too much 😠 ↳ marisabel_rguez As I should, please let me!! ↳ marisabel_rguez So, are you coming? ↳ marisabel_rguez Don't keep me waiting, guapa. ↳ yourusername fuck, okay Seen

alexiaputellas Hey hermanita, I know you were hesitant to tell us about your love life a little while ago, not wanting to jinx things and taking that time together to explore things in private before making things official.... but we will always love you no matter what and we want to love who's made you this happy too. So whenever you're ready, okay? Follow your gut and heart. I'd love to meet your special someone and learn everything about how she makes you happy, how you met, what she's like. I promise to be nice! 😉 Te quiero mucho, ardilla. Delivered

albaps9 yn i'm not going to lie, i'm hurt you've kept me out of the loop after i helped you get through it all. especially when i had to find out myself through instagram posts?? i always like to believe that you know you can come to me for your lows and your highs, so it hurts when you don't. i know you deal with these kind of things differently, especially after all that's happened, so i'll get over it and push my pride aside. but we'll still talk about this, kay? i just hope that you can let us in on your happiness once you're ready. and please don't forget that you deserve this and everything else you haven't even thought of. albaps9 btw, i'll keep my mouth shut for now like you asked, but i don't like keeping things from alexia and mama so it's best they hear it from you instead of connecting the dots as well. i won't lie to them if they ask me directly. i know you're hesitant to start anything new or to tell us so that we won't worry again. i get that you want to keep it private until you're sure it's serious, but we're here for you either way. no judgements, no standards. we just want to see you at your happiest and be there to see you like that. okay? vale. also, i love you, you fucking turd. Delivered

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↳ 21h ago: yourusername added to their story

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↳ 56min ago: yourusername added to their story

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Direct Messages

leilaouahabi Boooo, wrong equipo! ↳ yourusername you don't even play for barça anymore 🤣 ↳ leilaouahabi Once a culer, always a culer!!! Which you SHOULD KNOW! ↳ yourusername 😛 Seen

albaps9 lol alexia is sooo gonna interrogate you over this. good luck. i've kept my mouth so far but you're making it veeeery hard on yourself, little one. Seen

claudiaapina Just... why?! 😱 Seen

janafernandez3 Not cool 😣 ↳ yourusername sorry, lovely ): Delivered

alexiaputellas Que pasa??????? Yn...? 😟 alexiaputellas Oi, don't leave me on seen on this one!! Seen

marisabel_rguez You liked the match? ↳ yourusername sorry, what? was too busy ogling the goalie the entire match. still thinking about her, frankly. ↳ marisabel_rguez That's all I needed to hear. ↳ marisabel_rguez What about her are you thinking of exactly? ↳ yourusername well, what time she'll come back to the hotel, for example? ↳ marisabel_rguez Few hours or so, she just told me. Don't miss her too much in the meantime. ↳ yourusername welp... that's going to be hard! i need her here ): ↳ marisabel_rguez Keep the bed warm for her then. Think you can do that? ↳ yourusername on it. but tell her to not make me wait too long. ↳ marisabel_rguez Or? ↳ yourusername the door will be locked and i'll have a mighty entertaining evening all by myself... ↳ marisabel_rguez Y/n... 😫 ↳ yourusername 😊 Seen

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yourusername: found her. my missing piece 🧩 Liked by marisabel_rguez, marialeonn16, leahwilliamsonn and 4,287 others

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bff1 but you fucking hate puzzles. lockdown proved that. ↳ bff3 Because we couldn't find the missing piece for weeks, then found it in the couch!!!!!!! ↳ yourusername if i had known that’s where she’d be hidden away all this time, i would’ve deep cleaned the apartment waaaay sooner liked by 13 others ↳ bff3 🥹 ↳ yourusername that unfinished puzzle still haunts my dreams btw ↳ bff1 i too have nightmares of jigsaws, but i think that's a different sorta jigsaw entirely 👹🔪 ↳ bff2 who are you and what you have done with our friend for you to ignore that last slide @/bff1 ↳ bff1 the one time i behave and it's not appreciated? ffs ↳ bff3 I hadn't even noticed that one holy heckkk, yn!! so cute!! 🤩

albaps9 okay i see you, that’s why your door was locked ↳ bff1 be happy that it was 😬😂 ↳ yourusername um hello? can't a couple take a sweet bath together? ↳ bff1 um hi? sweet bath... my ass! ↳ albaps9 um HELLO? i'm still here?! 🤮

bff1 cheeseball ↳ yourusername only saying it how it is 🤷‍♀️

username1 still no tag?? 😫 ↳ username2 omfg leave them be ↳ username3 No need when the answers pretty clear ↳ username4 brb zooming in on that tatted hand 🕵️‍♀️

alexiaputellas Yn, everyone can see this ↳ jennihermoso You're just pressed that YOU saw it. And this was so tame. ↳ alexiaputellas Still my little sister. ↳ jennihermoso Part two: you're just pressed you don't know who she's snogging. ↳ alexiaputellas Can I dislike a comment on here, too?

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↳ 45min ago: yourusername added to their story This story is no longer available

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Direct Messages

albaps9 did you forget mama follows you too? she did NOT get the goalie joke and took it very literal albaps9 this one landed so wrong for ale too, she immediately called mami to call you 🤣 albaps9 ynn mami’s just asked me about it again. told her to text you, have fun with that. i love you but i'm not fixing your mess 🙃👋😘  Seen

alexiaputellas Y/n disculpe, but you posted it on your public story. And even if you'd posted it to your closed friends... I'm on there as well. Can I at least meet who you're seeing before I know, well... you know. Delivered

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Text Messages

○○○○○○○ mama 🌷(ICE) Why don't you pick up, laelia? mama 🌷(ICE) Mi hija... let me tell you something. mama 🌷(ICE) In relationships, some things are meant to be kept between the couple. To keep it special and protected. mama 🌷(ICE) If your story talks about what I think it does, you omg no mami, let's not, por FAVOR. i deleted it already!! mama 🌷(ICE) Vale, but seems I needed to say it to you, didn't I? You put yourself in this predicament. I see what you post too, linda. mama 🌷(ICE) Now, don't be embarrassed. When two people really love each other, that's just how things go. I'm glad you feel comfortable enough to show that side to one another. you please don't, i will ignore you. mama 🌷(ICE) Y/n, there's no need to feel weird. You can talk to me about everything. About sex too. I'm your mother, I'm supposed to help you navigate these things in life. It's important to feel comfortable during intercourse with yourself and your partner and to both enjoy it. It's not good to learn everything from the internet nowadays and I would never want you feeling insecure or worried about something when you can just talk to me about it. Nothing is too crazy, vale? you ○○○ mama 🌷(ICE) But it so happens that your sister is well-known and that means that some of her audience finds your internet pages too. I'm sure you didn't mean it in a bad way, but think of it next time, okay, querida? mama 🌷(ICE) And I just want to add, a healthy sex life is important, so it's good that you have that and can talk about what you like or don't like with each other. But I'd prefer not finding out you do from the internet. Or before having met your girlfriend. This goes for Alexia, too. She didn't like it. I want my first impression of your girlfriend to be a little different than knowing what she's good at, so to say. I know, no judgements from me, but you're still our niña pequiña, laelia. you ○○○ you ○○○ Read

Text Messages

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you you free right now? albaquerque 🌼 nope. still at work. why? you ack, you butt, you're texting me rn aren't you? albaquerque 🌼 bc when my tiny munchkin of a sis needs me, i'm here. it wounds me that you still don't know that </3 albaquerque 🌼 no seriously why? you buy a shovel after work and please, PUH-lease, help and bury me alive. albaquerque 🌼 jajajajaja mami?? you si, i want the ground to swallow me whole albaquerque 🌼 well i don't have time to come and help you, but maybe your gf will help you dig it with her bare, good-working, skilled and strong hands? or are you going to say she's even better with her tongue now? 😂😂😂😂 you vete a la mierda albaquerque 🌼 now for the love of god, go and tell ale before it's too late. she knows it's a goalie now, it's only a matter of time, yn. after that i'll help you shovel both your graves. seeing as misa will likely need one too. it'll be sooo romantic being next to each other even in death 😍 Seen

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username1: Well, the match just ended and... that was intense? Wanna guess what they were talking about before the ref sent them apart? I also want to know what Alexia quickly yapped to Misa after the goal because whatever it was, it wrecked her up for the rest of the match 😬 1...2...3.. go! Liked by 120 people

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username1 rip misa ouch, she looked so hurt ):

username2 ✨welcome to the family✨

username3 Yeah that didn't look too friendly but still personal 😬

username4 i just knew alexia was waiting all evening to wipe the smug smile off misa’s face the second they all shook hands before the kickoff lol

username5 First run-in with the in-laws already 😆😆

username6 misa’s strong for still staying with yn after this, i would’ve ran and cried, tail between my legs if alexia had done this like yes ma'am, okay ma'am, sorry ma'am.

username7 this was prob just the initiation to the putellas fam 🤝

username8 “Yn babe? Do you think your sister likes me?” :

username9 Awwwkwarddd...

username10 not yn making it worse by going to misa first after the match 🤣🤣🤣

username11 alexia the entire time: 🤨😐 ↳ username5 fr if looks could kill 🥴 ↳ username10 yn would be girlfriend-less

username12 yn come get your woman 

username13 Bark bark.

username14 MISA! BAD! ↳ username10 exactly, misa’s down bad 🤪

username15 Would've killed to be a fly on the wall in that locker room and hear the goss

username16 well, looks like they were having a great time 😳

username17 not the camera panning to yn momentarily ↳ username18 the camera operator is one of us 😭👏

username19 knowing misa, no appropriate words came out of that mouth tho 🤣🥵

username20 claws out 🥊 

username21 "You fuck my little sister? I'll fuck up your saving ratio! ☺️"

username20 okay no, if my gf fought in my honour and looked this good while doing it, i’d swoon ↳ username18 she didn’t save it tho 🫠 ↳ username20 it is the thought that counts!!!

username22 Wait, what happened between them? I thought they were such good friends? They used to have all these sweet moments together. That entire pk situation seemed so hostile... ↳ username15 Misa's allegedly dating Alexia's youngest sister. But no idea why they seemed so sour.

username23 everyone always talks about enemies to friends, but what about friends to enemies🤣

username24 Who cares?? Forca Barcaaaa!

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Text Messages

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you proud of you 🖤

m 💌 Shit game, but I could hear you cheer me on multiple times. Gracias, querida.

you yeah? you did?

m 💌 Yes 😘 It probably wasn't easy for you to cheer on both teams, but thank you for having my back.

you ofc, my love. always. 

you i'll always be your favourite cheerleading wag 🤩

m 💌 My only one! And you look really good doing it.

you too bad you didn’t save that pk tho, bc i would’ve screamed your name

m 💌 ○○○ m 💌 ○○○ m 💌 We still have tonight, no?

you ○○○ you ○○○ you ○○○ you ○○○ you no. you not before you apologise to alexia. you i know you said some things to get her that irked

m 💌 I’m just mad she’s mad. You're finally happy and now she's not. We told her and the first thing she did was walk away and ignore us for two weeks. That hurt. I tried to mend things during camp, but she was cold the entire time. She's making me feel like I'm not good enough for you. I know I shouldn't let my insecurities talk, but I also didn't like how her reaction to us made you go back to your ways of internalising and such. I don't like seeing you like that. And maybe she wouldn't have reacted this way if you were dating someone she didn't know, and then she wouldn't have had this reaction towards you either.

m 💌 And I've been feeling this mad since that very first moment, so I guess it just came out. I feel even worse now, because I never wanted to put you in this situation or make things with her even worse.

m 💌 Dios mio, and your mother was there too. I'm so sorry, Y/n.

you it's okay misa, you're a passionate person and are loud and fierce when you love. never apologise for it, because it's the very thing i love about you. i would never expect you to change your ways for anyone. i know you've been upset, and i'm sorry that it's not something i could control. but alexia has every right to feel that way, we should’ve handled it differently... told her sooner. i could see it hurt her when she realised mama and alba already knew. we've owned up to our mistake, but she needs some time to come around and forgive us, accept this is happening. she will, in time. that's just her. she's known you for a while and now i'm with you... she needs time to adjust not only seeing you as her friend, but as my girlfriend too. she feels a little awkward. i don't know what you said, but that probably didn't help her feel comfortable about the entire thing. no matter how much it worked me up seeing you that way.

m 💌 I'm not that kind of person to talk that way about women. Or about you.

you i know, amor. you but what did you say to her?

m 💌 I asked her if she was ready to take it, if she was sure, just normal talk to get her off focus, you know? It wasn't meant as anything personal, but then she returned the question, but about you. Asked me if I was sure about taking it while you were watching. I said that it would only help me do better. Then she asked me if I was sure I was good for you. 

you you are, please don't ever doubt yourself. you so so so so are.

m 💌 I tried to, but it just hit me the wrong way. So then the whole tone changed but everyone was watching so we tried to keep it lowkey, but it was so hard. I asked what kind of sister would say such a thing when you're clearly happy with me. Probably got a little cocky and said you'd come to me when I saved it, not to her, especially after her recent behaviour with you. I might have implied something would happen tonight between us if I saved it, though. That you were mine now. And I hate myself because I keep hearing the way I sounded while saying it and it disgusts me and I made it worse and I would never talk or think about you like property but the way she looked at me and said those things I just really wanted to hurt her back and I knew that would do it. I fucking hate and regret it. 

you easy, misa, i know, love. it's okay. i know you don't see me that way, you've never treated me as such. but it's happened, don't dwell on that. we can think of how to fix things now, okay? you but what did she whisper in your ear when she collected the ball from the goal?

m 💌 It's fine, don't you worry about it, querida.

you you don't have to protect me from it, you know? it's okay if you don't want to talk about it, but i'll ask ale about it either way. i want to know what hurt you so badly, and don't even deny it. i know you. whatever she said, don't take it to heart. not going to lie, you probably hit some vulnerable spots. i'll explain later why alexia's extra aggy about it all. but we need to talk about this, the three of us. and you two need to make up too. i'll coax up to her first or things might get even worse. going to her and olga's place rn.

you listen to me, everything will be okay, babe. vale? i love you.

m 💌 Yo tambien ❤️ you you can make yourself welcome at my place. dinner's in the fridge. you oh WAIT m 💌 Patiently 😇 you DON'T eat my cannoli!!!!!!!!!!!!!! m 💌 I was kind of planning on doing exactly that tonight... with your permission, of course 😉 you fuck you i love you 😩 m 💌 I love you more.

you and about that me being yours thing, if you ever say that again, i will jump your bones.

m 💌 You better hurry up then. 

m 💌 But be safe.

m 💌 You're my everything. And I really love you. Can you please never forget that?

Delivered

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↳ 49min ago: alexiaputellas added to their story 

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○○○○○○○ ale🐻 Home? you home! ale🐻 Safe? you and sound ❤️ ale🐻 Wish you could have stayed a little longer but today was... overwhelming and I'm spent. you it's okay, ale, everything's good again, yea? ale🐻 With you, always. Just give me a little more time. It still hurts a little, I wish I had known sooner. For what it's worth, I think you've found yourself both a best friend and a lover in her. I'm happy for you. you really? ale🐻 Yes, of course. I'm sorry my behaviour lately has made you question that. ale🐻 I realise it wasn't fair of me to not give you the freedom to decide your own life. You're your own person, no longer the little pigtailed pipsqueak hanging onto my neck with all your million questions all the damn time jaja. you don't think the pigtails will make a comeback, but i'll happily tackle your back for piggyback rides again? ale🐻 Please ❤️ ale🐻 But when you got so hurt last time around, we lost you. Lost the smiley you. The giddy you. The hermanita we knew. We couldn't reach you and that was really scary. I didn't know how to help and was not always around because of football. It's still one of my biggest regrets. I guess I'm just scared of you ever losing yourself like that again because someone broke your heart, so anyone who gets close to you like that... well, I don't like them or want them around you. But that was never fair of me. Because that was also going against what I want, which is you at your happiest. ale🐻 But when Misa made that comment before the penalty, she just sounded a lot like... you my ex. ale🐻 Si. I hate how I accidentally heard your ex talk about you like that, but then I hate it even more that that was normal for you... day in, day out. And then I hate myself again for not realising sooner and having pulled you out of that environment the second you started dating. If only I'd been around, I would've seen through her the second we met. I'm so sorry. you Don't be. She played it well. But I don't want to talk about that. What's done is done. I'm sorry you felt like that. ale🐻 Don't apologise for someone else's behaviour. ale🐻 Anyway, it was stupid for me to take out my frustration on Misa. If I hadn't, she wouldn't have caught my bait. I know Misa's not like that. It was just a little bad-mouthing to get the nerves up. But she hit me exactly where it hurt. Don't think she realised. you she does realise. she doesn't know why it hurt exactly, but she feels bad and wants to apologise. face to face. can she? not tonight of course. go get your sleep now. you just, one of these days? please. you i want you two to get along again. i don't want our relationship to ruin your friendship just as much as i don't want you to hate my girlfriend. ale🐻 Vale. ale🐻 You love her, and I've loved her as a friend before she meant something to you. I'll try, okay? you you sound a lot like mama you did she give you a lecture after the game? ale🐻 😣 you how are your ears? still hurting from the pinching? 🤣 ale🐻 I'm too tall for that now , she can't reach me😁 ale🐻 But it's okay. Go to sleep, laelia 😛 ale🐻 I love you. you i love you too you and i'll never not look up to you ale🐻 And I promise that from now on, I'll never not be here for you 😘

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enjoy your week lovelies 🌻

[theminecraftbee]

task: answer the following question. do you believe in curses? respond as completely with relevant information as possible.

Grian: Well, that's a lie. This isn't a task. I know it's not a task, I set the things up! Not sure why we're getting a question as pointless as this one, but sure, mysterious scroll, I'll answer. There's no such thing as curses, unless you're Timmy, in which case it's funny, yeah? Besides, I didn't actually kill Etho. Even if that did count, self-fulfilling prophecies aren't the same thing as curses, and I know which one I fall under.

Joel: Do I believe in bloody curses what kind of question is that? Do I really get hearts just for answering this? This feels like a prank or something... well, whatever. There are no such thing as curses, except the Boogeyman curse, which I sort of had today, but it wasn't actually the same at all. A lot of the bloodlust, sure, but a lot more... Etho had to be the one to do it, huh? And it's not the same. Not comforting. That's a stupid thing to say actually. Take it out of wherever you're putting this. Cut it out of the recording. Comforting. Please. As if it were ever... Yeah, I'm done actually. Don't have a good answer. Go away.

Scott: What, other than Jimmy? Bless that man, he may not have died first, but he sure tried his best. Sure, I'll believe Jimmy is cursed. I mean, mostly he's just kind of stupid. Lovingly so. I mean, despite him being stupid, I put up with him, right? That seems like a complete answer to this question. Jimmy's an omen but we put up with him anyway. That's all.

Mumbo: NO RESPONSE GIVEN.

Pearl: Oh, I mean, I'm probably cursed. That's what everyone liked to say at one point. I think... I mean, I think this time I have good friends, which is nice. They don't think I'm cursed. And it's not like I--I mean, it's surprisingly fun, acting cursed! And I am just acting. Acting scary, blowing up dance floors, all of that. And I don't really have to this time, so... Maybe I'm not cursed? And since it's acting, it's not real? This is a weird question.

Etho: Oh, man, that's a question. Um, do I have to answer? Because I feel like if I say no, that's really just asking for it, but if I say yes, I have to explain myself. Uh, I think I'm abstaining, unless the zombie thing from earlier counts. That was scary and I hated it. Curses are scary and I hate them in general, but apparently I'm good at them, if you ask everyone else. Um, it's not the only thing I find scary that apparently I'm good at.

Scar: Why, of course I believe in curses! Look at poor, poor... Timbert? Timmy? Jim? Gosh, sorry, I'm very tired right now. That's more proof of curses, by the way! That I'm tired. I've been tired straight since the desert, let me tell you what. And that, my friends, is a curse like no other. What a terrible beast, loneliness is. Wish me luck breaking it, because it's not happening this season!

Cleo: Oh, you mean the thing people like to blame instead of their own actions? Nah. My soulbond was kind of a curse, I guess, but even that's at least half just... bad people. Bad relationships. Good ones, too. We're all just doing what you can, you know? No script, no curses, no characters, just... Oh, I hope everything turns out tomorrow. Sorry, that's unrelated. It's just nicer to hope than to preemptively blame things on curses that don't exist.

Impulse: Well, I mean, I didn't until you just asked me that, but now I feel like I should. Wouldn't that be nice? Being cursed instead of just sort of unlovable? Sorry, no, that's mean to Gem. I shouldn't say that about Gem, she's been good this season. Super, super cursed, mind you, in the like, game mechanic sense? But she's been good, no backstabbing or inability to get love involved. Um, and I guess that's not fair to Bdubs, kind of, except it also totally is and I haven't forgiven him. So I guess if they ask I said I believed in curses, and that's why my life keeps circling clocks? Don't put any of that other stuff down, I'm trying to work on that.

Lizzie: NO RESPONSE GIVEN.

Gem: I was just cursed for a task, but that probably isn't what you're asking about, right? I'm new, so I don't know! A task is a concrete thing to believe in, like bloodshed or victory or fun and games. You don't have to believe in those to know they're real, either! They just are, whether you like it or not. I understand that much!

Tango: Gah, don't talk to me about... Deep breaths. Look, I don't care if it's a curse, or if it's just me being really bad, or what, I'm not going out pointlessly this time. Jimmy managed not to die first, I can manage to not go out to a stray arrow or my own bomb or a misstep this time, right? Is that so much to ask?

Skizz: Huh? Curses? I mean, I don't think so, and to be totally honest I think it's kind of mean the way people sometimes rag on people about them. Everyone's got so many good things about them! Why do people like to focus on the unfortunate luck, huh?

Bdubs: Hah! Curses! Let me tell you about curses. When I see curses, I eat them for breakfast. I don't got curses, I've got better things to do! I've got my buddies with the Mounders, and I've got-well, I'd say keeping Etho safe, but he's being weird at me again this season. Not that it matters. It never matters. Etho and I, we're... The point is, that doesn't matter anyway, because I have the Mounders, and they're the ones who matter here. And because I'm a strong, independent Bdubs, who doesn't need anyone but my bow and my perfect, flawless fighting prowess! Sorry, what was the question? I've been thinking so much lately that it's just sort of made everything else pop out of my head, so it's hard to keep track. I'm sure I answered it flawlessly, though.

Martyn: Of course there are curses. That's half the fun for you lot, isn't it? Putting your little curses on us and watching us rail against them. Bet you think it's real cute to ask us what we think of the things, too. "Oh, what do you think of curses," like we have any control over them. Please. If I had any control over curses, Jimmy--or, well, no, I guess that one was technically broken, wasn't it? Sure doesn't feel like it. Point is, curses are bad, and they're definitely real, and I hate you for them, got it?

BigB: Look, man, if you're trying to get me to write my character out for you, just say so! I won't tell anyone. We can come up with a hole thing about holes and red tasks and the Backrooms together! It'll be fun! After all, you probably don't know what kind of curse to say I have, right? Haha, just kidding. I have no idea what I'm talking about. Luckily, neither does anyone else, so I think that evens out between the lot of us.

Jimmy: NO RESPONSE GIVEN.

[freeworldallahmbaclass]

Another monument for me this time in my hometown Harlem New York City for finding the cure for HIV/AIDS that is what the statue symbolizing me finding the cure for HIV / AIDS and funny stuff it is on 135th street across from the Percy Sutton school and I laugh at the 32nd precinct now I found the cure for HIV / AIDS and I sponsor it get Cabenuva it will help you go undetected for HIV eliminating the chance of it developing into Aids the miracle has finally reached the general public and I sponsor it so forget the noise and take your medicine as prescribed so you grow up healthy and strong success is the best revenge guaranteed you heard it from me Cabenuva is that cure and I sponsor it thank you I'm honored for the privilege to help , thanks .

Thank you so much . I love you according to Christianity you are forgiven and according to Joel Osteen I can't compromise with that , no thank you I forgive you .

Thank you I'm honored . Wherever their is people starving and dying from hunger and HIV AIDS use my page to help that country whether it's India , Brazil and not talked about regions and areas in poor neighborhoods in places like Africa and raise the salary for people in Dhaka give them water pumps and more on their paychecks so they can afford to take care of their families thank you it has been great helping the people goodbye and good luck to you and your family .

Eat good , be content with the little bit that you do have like good friends and put God first and everything else that you want and better yet need will be added to you , and read these books from my personal coach , trainer and mother Joyce Meyer and new Minister and teacher of New York City my mom and your mother Joyce Meyer . I'm just happy that all my friends are successful in life and prospering in their career and have blessed families even though the puppet masters had me on the computer trying to hate on them on facebook and this social media tumblr page for years typing on the computer trying to hate on them but they are good and doing great in life and now my conscious is clear and it is not as expensive pain for me no more as long as they good great music great wives and kids and longevity in their career I decided to go back to them as their friend and stay with my friends and keep that circle of friends that I grew up with and keep the hope for myself because I still believe in love for myself like that Vado and Mary J Blige song beautiful Mary J Blige , I got the fame I wanted and the mother play I wanted sponsored by the 2nd stage theater I got what I wanted basically now I'm at peace with myself now and is being educated by my ministers and pastors and my second call to do something I love , music and stay with God first place in my life .

The greatest donation I can give to anybody , I give you a dollar to get your life together and in some places it can pay your bail and God will take that hold off of your life and free your head from the birds I mean the vultures and stop Satan your enemy from stealing the word God's word from your heart and memory .

Congratulations to me for my gift 🎁 from the Brooklyn public library a book called the making of a king 👑 by Robert Hardman about me King Charles the third and the modern monarchy and them crowning Nicki Minaj and Cardi B real Queens of the world officially like official Queens of the world now that is hot thank you both sponsor me and my practical basic education and it is good since I'm a private person and shy away from the crowd both women is people that the public the hood like more than me and love so they could be friends with them they are like my protectors what I mean is like I give you somebody you could be friends with if you don't like me a lot of people don't a d aren't going to like you can't like the person helping that is how it is that is always how it is with leaders and since people see me as the geek type quiet reserved guy my female friends women friends are more cool and outgoing and love to meet people and chill with the common people and party with them while I stay to myself , thank you it has been an honor helping with this page I hope this help find you in good health good luck and goodbye , thanks .

I woke up here and I inherited it the same place where I'm at its bad but it is mines I inherited it , thank you .

Yes I do stay in a not so clean and dangerous place well a dirty place if you call it that but if you know anything about me I actually own the neighborhoods I live in I own the hospital my own hospital given to me by a Governor it's my incubator , I own the parks in my neighborhood New York City parks now all of them now and where I live in where the girls don't get to come to see me here but I venture out to see them sometimes we are cool they call it a liability but I inherited these neighborhoods and New York City and a rough and dangerous place to live but it is okay and hopefully my goodness , hospitable charm and love for them warms them and help them like I said thank you I'm working on getting out of here so I will see you outside thank you .

I'm King 👑 the decree from the British Monarchy thank you that is huge thanks and own the 2nd stage theater is mines and no I don't mess with street people no more I did everything for them got them Citibikes computers on Rikers Island and legalized weed for them and I moved on from them and Governor Kathy Hochul told me to dump them slim down lose the weight from the overload of carrying my enemies and their girlfriends off of me and get my life together and I'm doing just that no thank you that should make us friends .

I'm going to end it on this note here Vado from Harlem a rap musician and Mary J Blige got a song called I still believe in love that is somebody from my neighborhood that made it a way for me to be able to get a future for myself financially through a regular paying job and getting myself together and I said thank you to him and Mary thanks now Im stepping off from them and wish them the best of luck in their career and goodbye to me from my old neighborhoods and people from my past so that I can get my life together anybody got any ideas on how a super hero can get a good paying job , see you on there side of success personal success thanks and goodbye it has been an honor helping the people .

[kingkat12]

seven minutes in heaven (roman godfrey x reader)

WARNINGS: foul language, alcohol, book-accurate Roman lol, (and he is such a brat???)

summary: you really, really hate Roman Godfrey. but what you hate most, is that he doesn't notice you at all.

word count: 4,502

PART 1, PART 2, PART 3, PART 4, PART 5, PART 6, PART 7, PART 8, PART 9

I didn't like Roman Godfrey— not one bit. 

Everything about that spoiled brat was infuriating. All from the way he walked around as though he owned the town, to the way that he'd get a kick out of throwing tater tots at people. Fucking child. The amount of times I'd sat at the bleachers and watched him throw it at the cheerleaders, specifically aiming right down their shirts, made my blood boil.

Roman Godfrey believed that the world was his, including the people living in it. That's exactly why he dared to take such liberties. 

I specifically hated the way he'd move his hair out of his green, green eyes, the look he'd give me after he tugged my hair in the hallway with a sneer, and his sadistic need to claim his conquests in the absolute weirdest ways known to man. If we are to believe Brooke Bluebell from the cheerleading team, he also had an affinity for poking girls with needles in public just for the sheer thrill of watching them squeal. Because who would tell him off, right? I wondered if he was familiar with the word 'no' at all.

After the needle-rumour spread, I made sure to keep a few meters between us at all times. There was no way in hell that he would get away with doing that to me, anyway. 

And I would've stayed as far away from Roman as possible, had it been up to me. Sadly, my best friend at school was his cousin— just my luck. Letha, like the rest of the girls at school, was quite fond of Roman; since she was the oldest of the two, she somehow couldn't see that he had grown past the age of five, treating him as though he could do no wrong.

And this was why Roman was always invited whenever we would have study sessions at Letha's place. He would splay himself out on the bed, stretching out his long limbs, watching us as we worked and he lazed away. 

God, how I hated him. I hated the way his hair was kissing his forehead when he laid like this in Letha's bed, the way he'd grin whenever he watched me erase a wrong answer, and the way his cologne would linger in my system several hours after he'd left.

Currently, we were supposed to be working on the half-year assignment everyone in our year had to do. Letha was sitting at her desk with her back turned to us as Roman and I sat on the bed, each with our own computer. My meter-rule to protect myself from any incoming needles was impossible to implement on Letha's tiny bed, and I let out a huff as Roman's knee touched mine. I prayed to every God in the universe that he didn't have a needle in his pockets somewhere— I was quite fond of my knees, and would very much like to keep them intact.

"Five hundred bucks," Roman tried, nudging me. "Do this assignment for me and it's yours."

I rolled my eyes, shifting further away from him on the bed. "Do your own shit," 

He proceeded to sneer, watching me with his big, green eyes. "Six hundred,"

"No,"

"Seven?"

"Suck it, Roman," I cracked my knuckles, doing my best to get back into the flow of writing the assignment. It was so damn hard to focus when Roman's incessant sighing continued, almost as though he was being forced to take his own life. 

"Help me, then," he mumbled, moving closer to me. His leg was almost on top of mine, now. "How did you answer question b?" Roman leaned over me, his head now obstructing my view of my screen. In a flash of pure instincts, I closed my eyes, inhaling the scent of his hair that was tickling my nose. I couldn't quite put my finger on exactly what it was that smelled so good— him or the shampoo?

I got yanked out of my state when Roman pulled away, typing away on his own laptop, finally inspired. 

I couldn't help but sigh; I hated Roman. And I hated that he didn't notice me in the way I wanted him to. I hated the way he smiled, the way he'd so blatantly flirt with girls at any opportunity he'd get, and how my heart fluttered when he flirted with me once in a blue moon.

It only got worse when we were in chemistry class the next day, and Roman had caught me sitting all alone in the back. I wasn't sure what came over me and why I had allowed him to sit down next to me again— the last time had been an absolute catastrophe where he got the both of us kicked out for bickering too loudly, so I hoped it wouldn't be a repeat-situation. I really needed to make sure I was getting every drop of information out of class today, as we had a test coming up soon.

However, Roman was the absolute biggest distraction on earth. I knew this. He kept leaning over to draw crude drawings in my book, making me have to swat his hand away over and over; "Stop it!"

Roman huffed, leaning back against his chair with a bored expression on his face. "You're no fun," he whispered back. 

And this was when it hit me— maybe I wasn't fun? Did he really think that of me? 

... Maybe it was time to show him how fun I could be?

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When Letha mentioned a party happening this weekend and the fact that Roman would be joining, I couldn't help but feel a certain sense of dread— I knew what that would entail for him. He'd either disappear with a girl upstairs and/or get absolutely shitfaced, as always. And was I really going to put myself through seeing him disappear with someone else again just to prove I wasn't boring?

Yes— Yes, I was.

As I sipped my drink, I couldn't help but feel my hatred for Roman simmer and come to a boil— I hated how he had me doing the most ridiculous things known to man just to get a sliver of his attention. Why was a question I couldn't bring myself to answer. 

As I stood in the kitchen with Letha, I spotted Roman passing by the door, laughing with a friend of his. My heart thumped hard as I let out a shaky breath; "Letha, I have to tell you something,"

She turned to me, a beer in her hand. "Don't tell me you've killed someone again? I don't have the energy to drag another body out of my car today,"

"Ha-ha," I mumbled; had this been any other instance, I would've thought it was funny... but not right before I was about to tell her why I had come tonight. I dreaded it; I knew she'd disapprove. But just as I opened my mouth, ready to put my friendship on the line, I caught Roman backtracking and appearing in the door again.

"Girls!" He walked over, looking tipsy as ever. Up close like this, Roman towered over the both of us, and I had to look up an unusual amount to meet his eyes. "I've been looking for you all over! They're playing seven minutes in heaven downstairs, wanna join?"

Had this been any other night, I would've given him an immediate no— but tonight was different. Tonight, I was fun. Shrugging, I glanced over at Letha to check her reaction.

"That's so childish," Letha mumbled, sipping her beer. "I don't know, and I'm sure grumpy over here isn't too keen on that either—"

"No, I'm in!" My words came out like a panicked squeal which immediately made my cheeks burn. 

Roman seemed caught off guard by my reaction, but he eventually reached out to pat my shoulder, looking smug as ever. "There you go," he cooed, clearly teasing me. "Maybe you'll finally get laid or something!"

I was abruptly reminded of why I hated him so much in the first place. Swatting his hand off of me, I brushed my fingers over my shoulder where he had touched me, feeling a lingering burn. "If you think seven minutes is enough for everything that goes into sex, I think you need to lower that ego of yours,"

Letha bit back a smirk as Roman's lips parted in shock. Maybe the spoiled rich kid hadn't gotten a reality-check from his long list of women before? He eventually recovered from the diss, rolling his eyes; "Well, seven minutes with me can be more than enough. Need me to show you?"

Letha let out a loud snort, shuddering; "Ew, Roman! I've told you not to talk to my friends like that!"

As they turned to each other, bickering like siblings, I gripped the counter behind me with all my strength. I was almost compelled to agree, to say yes to letting him have a go, and I had to bite down on my tongue to stop myself. After a few drinks, I knew I could get a little loose-lipped.

It didn't take long before we all made it downstairs, everyone spreading out on the couches and chairs scattered in the basement. Letha and I sat down on a few pillows on the floor, far away from Roman and his rumoured needles. 

I felt my throat go dry every time the bottle spun around, landing on random people from school who later went into the empty closet nearby. But my attention was elsewhere; I watched as Roman put his arm around the girl next to him, whispering something into her ear which made her laugh. It made me want to slam my head into the wall behind me— I would rather pass out and bleed out than witness him picking up another girl again. 

I swallowed hard as the people in the closet came back out and the bottle got spun again. The first person was picked; a girl with long, brown hair whom I remembered from history class; huge bitch. Holding my breath, I watched as the bottle got spun again— it eventually slowed down and pointed to Roman, which made the girl's friend group cheer as though they had won a million dollars. It felt like my heart was getting ripped out of my chest as Roman got up from the couch, grinning from ear to ear. The girl he had just had his arm around wasn't as happy, to say the least.

This whole display was making me sick. I bit the inside of my cheek as Roman closed the door to the closet and the previous drinks in my system threatened to come up. Everything about this was making me sick. I got up, taking hurried steps to the nearest bathroom, planting myself on my knees in front of the toilet just in case.

I heard a few knocks on the door before Letha stepped in, looking worried. "I told you not to drink that vodka crap," she mumbled, locking the door before she sat down next to me on the floor.

I felt my tears press on as I grew further nauseous. "Don't mind me," I breathed. "I just need a minute." 

This only solidified my absolute and utter hate for Roman. Spoiled fucking brat— why did he have to make me feel this way? Why was my jealousy making me so sick and bitter?

Letha put her hand on my back in an attempt to soothe me; "Maybe I should drive you home?"

"No!" I said, fighting my gag reflex. "I need— I need to get out there again."

This only made Letha sigh, her hand now reaching for my hair to be ready. "You have a crush out there or something...? You know that you don't need this stupid game to get whichever guy you want, right?" 

I did my best to get up from the floor without immediately falling back down. Of course she didn't understand. 

"Seriously, hold on—" Letha grabbed my hand, holding me back from leaving the bathroom. Her eyes were just as green as Roman's, and up close like this, I could see all their similarities; the upward curve of their nose, the same full lips, and the exact same way of weaving their brows together in worry. "You don't need to do anything just because you want to prove Roman wrong," she said, squeezing my hand. "I know you came down here to make a point, but... do what's best for you, okay?"

"Okay," I mumbled, tugging at her hand. The seven minutes were almost up, and I wanted to see the look on that girl's face after she left the closet with Roman. I wanted to see the look of bliss in her eyes, the hint of red in her cheeks, and watch her inhale with soft, sharp breaths just like the rest of his girls always did. The best part of watching this, was imagining that the girl was me instead— that I was the one feeling euphoric, and not her. And on the other hand, the masochistic part of me wanted to feel my heart burn with jealousy and my chest tighten with the ache I had gotten so familiar with. "Let's go. Please."

My nausea dulled down as I sat back down on the floor, realizing Roman was back. Maybe it was good that I missed the moment they came out— maybe it was good for me to spare my psyche, just this once? As my eyes met Roman's across the room, I couldn't help but notice the dark satisfaction on display across his lips. It was almost as though he knew— or maybe it was the fact that I probably looked a little sick? Did he like the look of pain in my eyes? I was reminded of Brooke Bluebell and her needle story... how he liked imposing pain on girls he found to be vulnerable. The fucking needle thing would haunt me forever.

I barely noticed that the bottle had been spun again, and I was yanked out of my mind-storm when Letha nudged me. "You don't have to," she tried, nodding towards the bottle that was now pointing at me.

My eyes immediately moved from the bottle and straight to Roman, who seemed to grow further amused. There was no way in hell I would back down now— maybe this would change his outlook on me? I had to prove I was fun, after all. Shrugging, acting as though it was no big deal, I reached for the bottle, spinning it.

I couldn't help but ponder if someone up there in the sky was playing games with me when the bottle pointed at the one person I had hoped it would be.

The girl Roman had just been with protested; "What? That's against the rules! He can't go in two times in a row!—"

"Sure can," Roman shot in, watching my every movement like a hawk— something told me he was a little excited about this as well. He got up from the couch once more, walking up to me with confident strides, reaching out for my hand. 

As I looked up at him, breath short and choppy, I couldn't pry my eyes away from his. I had always imagined what it would be like to look up at Roman from this angle, to see the sheer look of satisfaction on his face as I— Oh no, my mind was wandering again, wasn't it? I did my best not to shiver as I accepted his hand, feeling our fingers intertwine as he smoothly got me up from the floor.

I didn't even dare to look at Letha in this moment, knowing how she probably felt about it, but I really didn't have time to dwell on it— and it didn't take long before Roman closed the closet door behind us, pulling me back into the moment.

We were quiet for a few seconds, the sounds of our breathing filling the closet— I didn't know what to say or do. The beating of my heart was so loud that I could barely hear my own thoughts, and the light in the small room was dim and warm, making it a rather disorienting experience. It didn't take long before I felt my back hit the wall, letting out a little wince; the alcohol was definitely doing wonders for my balance. 

Roman snorted at the sight, emitting a soft laugh; "Careful, there," 

I let out the breath I had been holding, happy that he had been the first one to say something. "It's the vodka," I mumbled, rubbing the part of my head that had hit the wall. 

Roman hummed; "Typical,"

"What is?"

"That you can't handle your drinks,"

I wanted to smack him— that was allowed in seven minutes of heaven, right? "So what if I can't? It's not a big deal,"

"Sure," Roman said, nodding to himself. "You just need to be broken in or something." 

I wasn't the biggest fan of his choice of words— I was also not a fan of the thought of Roman breaking me more than he had already done, all whilst being completely unaware of it. Choosing not to comment on it further, I switched the subject; "So when was the last time you didn't do anything with a girl in this game?"

He needed a few seconds to scour his brain; "Never, I think,"

Typical. "Even back in middle school?"

"... Definitely,"

I held back a rather large groan— I should've predicted this. 

Roman caught onto my eventual silence; "And I reckon this is your first time playing?"

"... Yeah,"

"Okay, I see," Roman ran his fingers through his hair, the usual smirk returning. "You know what usually happens in here, or...?"

I rolled my eyes; "I'm not an idiot,"

"I know," Roman's voice got lower, breathier, as he took a step closer. There wasn't much room for more steps, actually— it was getting rather cramped up at this point. "But if there's anything you've always wanted to try out and haven't dared to, now's the time."

My breath hitched as I hoped the thumping of my heart wasn't loud enough for him to hear. There were many things I wanted to try out, sure, but not here.

It was almost as though Roman could sense how nervous I was; he bent down a little, getting on my level before he whispered; "I won't tell Letha,"

... Oh? Feeling his hot breath against my skin, how dangerously close he was, was almost too much for me. The way he said it made me even more conscious of what was happening; I hadn't even told Letha how crazy I was about Roman yet, and I knew she'd be against it.

However, I was being served my biggest dream on a silver platter. Maybe if I got this bit over with, my feelings would subside and go back to being purely hateful again? 

"Okay..." I mustered up the courage, letting out a shaky breath before I opened my mouth to speak; "Could you maybe... kiss me, then?" My words came out barely louder than a whisper. "I've just had a really shitty night."

Roman's expression remained unchanged. "I'm sorry to hear that,"

"... No, you're not,"

"Okay, you might be right," He let out a soft laugh against my lips, and my eyes quickly darted down to his hands to check if he was holding a needle or not. One could never be sure... and this was how I knew my anxiety was through the roof.

"So... you want a kiss? That's all?" Roman asked, looking rather pleased with himself and the situation.

This was too nerve-wracking. I kept imagining that he would switch up and tell me no, that he would reject me somehow and make me the only girl at school he didn't want to do anything with— that would definitely make me hate him even more. In a flash moment of weakness (which I later blamed the alcohol for), I sighed; "Just... could you? Or am I asking for too much?"

Something about Roman's expression changed— he seemed to realize what I was actually asking for before I fully understood it myself. Not to make out, not to drown in one another, but the simplest of all things romance; affection. Something gentle, something sweet, just to check if he had a sliver of anything resembling that in his system. 

"You like me, don't you?" Roman whispered, nudging his nose against mine, eyes rounding out as he heard my breath hitch at the simple gesture. "This is what all of this has been about?"

Doing my best to still my breathing and not faint, I closed my eyes, revelling in the feeling. It was the smallest thing, yet it was a comfort in the midst of the conversation. "All of what?"

"Your anger," Roman let out a sigh, connecting our foreheads, closing his eyes as well. "You can't stand that you like me, can you?"

For some reason, I felt the urge to cry— I spent a few seconds pressing down the stream of tears that threatened to surface. Having someone say it out loud felt like a desperately needed release. "It's been a nightmare,"

Roman stilled, eventually letting out a hum which sent a shiver down my spine. "You know nothing about nightmares," he breathed against my lips. "If I tell Letha we fucked in here, you'll be living through your worst one."

For fuck's sake. I mumbled a curse as Roman laughed, clearly amused by the terrified look on my face. "No, I wouldn't do that," he teased, pulling away just a bit. "I'm not that bad, you know that, right?"

I huffed, not meeting his gaze anymore. Confessing to liking him had given him all the power over me in the world. "I don't know... You tend to be quite horrible,"

"And what horrible things do I do, may I ask?"

Oh, I was ready for this question— I had been ready for a while. "First of all, the fucking tater tots," I grumbled, meeting his amused eyes. "The fact that you pull my hair like you're five years old, you've drawn about a hundred dicks in my chemistry book, and the whole needle thing!"

"Needle thing?" Roman furrowed his brows— damn, he and Letha really had the same face, didn't they? 

"Yeah, the needle thing! Brooke told us!" Something about the confusion on his face felt rather satisfactory; your turn. "You pricked her and her friend Rachel and just... laughed, or something!"

Remembering the incident, Roman burst out laughing. "Oh, that!" he said, putting a hand on my shoulder. "Yeah, that was fun, I can't lie. So, okay, maybe I'm a bit bad, but... you still like me." His eyes were sparkling with mischief, and I knew it could lead to no good. "You still want to kiss me, so you can't be too scared? Or maybe..." Roman's hand travelled up to my hair, tucking a strand behind my ear as he smirked. "Maybe you're just a massive masochist?"

"What? No!" My protests were quick and loud— I wondered what the people outside this closet thought we were doing. "Roman, just... Ugh, fuck this, I'm leaving."

As I reached for the door, Roman grabbed my hand with force I hadn't expected of him, pinning it above my head against the wall. Like this, he was even closer to me than he had been just under a minute ago, and my eyes went wide with the realization that I could physically feel his bottom lip against mine, not yet coming together in the kiss I so desperately craved.

"I'm not going to make this easy for you," he whispered, words slow and low. Something about this whole situation was so intense, I nearly gave in to a shiver. "Whatever this will be, you and I... won't be easy."

"There is no you and I," I mumbled, feeling my heart beat up against his chest. "We do this once, and then we forget it." Please.

Roman hummed, a cocky grin spreading across his plush, pink lips. "You think you'll be able to? I have a feeling you've wanted me for a while,"

Fuck's sake. I hated him even more when he was right. My gaze hardened as it met his, and I wondered how much time we had left. No matter how mad I was at him, I still wanted to kiss him, just once. This might be the only chance I'd ever get, and I was going to take it. 

"Okay, then," Roman accepted my silence as an answer. Nudging my nose with his, he finally pressed his lips against mine with a softness I didn't know he had in him. 

This was not what I had expected. Something about this kiss was shaking up my whole view of the world, along with my view of Roman. The most obnoxious guy with an unmatched arrogance could... kiss like this? Like he actually had a soul? 

His lips moved against mine as though I was made of glass, and I felt his fingers intertwine with mine in the hand he was holding above my head. It sent shivers down my spine as my mind went haywire, wondering why he was being so careful with me. I brought my free hand up to cup his face, feeling how soft he was against my palm. I had expected him to be rough, aggressive... so what on earth was this?

Roman's arm snaked around my waist as he pulled me closer, and I let out a shaky breath against his lips— heat swirled in the pit of my stomach, feeling as though I was burning up from inside. 

But just as it started to get heated, two knocks were heard at the door; Roman pulled away, a victorious smirk in place as though he had successfully proved his point. "Thirty seconds left," he said. "Now, convince me why I shouldn't tell Letha."

What? Still trying to catch my breath, I felt myself freeze up. How was I supposed to think clearly when I was in this state? Roman's hand slid out of mine, waiting for my answer; "So?"

"Just don't," I breathed, putting a hand on my chest to feel my heart— did all of this just happen? "Don't tell her."

"That's not good enough," His green eyes were drilling into mine, and it was clear that he wished to corner me. Sadist.

"I'll do your stupid assignment,"

"Nope,"

"I'll... fuck, Roman, I don't know!" 

Roman snickered at my panic, fixing his hair, checking his clock; ten seconds left. "Fine, I'll be nice," he said, reaching out to swipe his thumb along the edge of my lip, wiping away some lipstick. "But you owe me."

Owe him? I wasn't the biggest fan of making a deal with the devil reincarnate in front of me. However, did I have any other choice? I let out a sigh of defeat; "... Fine,"

And this was when it truly hit me; I hated Roman Godfrey with all my heart— I hated the fact that he could make my heart flutter with the smallest gesture, that he could practically walk all over me with no remorse, and that he always looked so fucking good. 

However, at the end of the day, what I hated most... was how much I wanted him.

(a/n: click to read PART 2, PART 3, PART 4, PART 5, PART 6, PART 7, PART 8, PART 9 here!! thank you for reading!<333)

[ja3hwa]

♡ 𝐃𝐚𝐲 𝟏𝟓: 𝐂𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐮𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 - 𝐊.𝐇𝐉 ♡

God Isn't Here

【sʏɴᴏᴘsɪs】 : Bad Boy Hongjoong wanted to change for you. Be the better man you deserved, but what if you ended up changing more than him?

『ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ』 :  3.70k

-> ɢᴇɴʀᴇ: Slice of Life. Toxic family. Smut. ANGST. Sad Stuff.

ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ: BadBoy!Hongjoong x Religious!GoodGirl!Reader

[ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢs] : Heavy religious background. Mention of a cult like life. Lots of trauma. Pet names. Swearing. Corruption and slight manipulation. Thigh riding. Dry humping. Oral. Crying turned to sobbing. (I'm sorry this is a shit show). Fingering. Sight sir kink (I can't help myself). When I say this is messy....this is MESSY, FILTHY, DIRTY. Breast play. Clothing is literally being ripped apart. Slight ass play and mention of anal. Hickies. Mention of sex toys. There is way too much dirty talk cause Hongjoong has a filthy mouth. Use of the name slut. So much sobbing please forgive me I was in a mood. Cowgirl. Unprotected sex. Loss of virginity. Spanking.

Thank you, @historyinmybed , for requesting Hongjoong. Also, thank you to my anony for requesting the plot ♡♡♡

Note: I want to point out that this fic this is no way hating on any type of religion. I came from a very religious household, so I get the idea of internal hatred to yourself and 'god'. But please take this fic with a grain of salt. Believe what you want to believe and practise what you wish to practise. No one should tell you what you can or can not worship. That's your life. Not there's.

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Perfection. That was what your family described you as. Their perfect little daughter. Naturally pretty, above-average smarts and a people person. Well, that was what your parents dressed you as. They weren't half wrong to be fair. You wanted nothing more than to be the sweet daughter that your parents wanted. But once your heart fell for the mysterious man that stumbled in the back of your bookshop one day. Perfect was no longer the description to view you as.

Rough, mysterious, heartbreaking bad boy. He looked like he jumped straight out of a dark romance novel. He was everything you were not and when he laid eyes on you, he knew he wanted to know you, have you, hold you. To fuck the innocence out of you. But he proceeded with caution. Not wanting to scare you away. He was known as a player, someone that fucked around and partied most weekends…

Yet he changed.

Changed for you. He dotted on you. Followed you around like a loving puppy that found his favourite thing in the world. Which he had. You were his everything and the love of his life and he would do anything for you. And he made sure you knew that every chance he could. Bringing you flowers to your work or gifting you with a home-cooked meal even though he wasn’t the greatest cook. He wanted you to know that he loves you. Forever and always. And when you were cuddling on the couch in your shared apartment―the apartment your parents didn’t know you had―one night, Hongjoong couldn’t seem to keep his hands to himself. He tried not to do something you didn’t want but fucking his fist to the thought of you was no longer working. He needed the real deal. And tonight he tried his luck. His touches were slow, sensual. You almost didn’t notice them while you were so focused on the new show Fionna and Cake in front of you. But when his fingertips grazed the end of your sleep shorts, your head snapped to him seeing he was completely focused on you, not even paying attention to the TV.

You gulped looking at him with such wide innocent eyes. The tingle in your gut made you confused but it also intrigued you, wanting to know what it was but you were also scared it might be considered unholy. You see, you were fighting an inner battle. Yes, you had left your family's practice and ran away with Hongjoong after he convinced you of your family's toxic lifestyle. You wouldn’t ever consider your life being involved around a cult-like community but yet it was all you knew. And when you opened a bookshop in your hometown your parents made sure to monitor the shop like hawks but neither of them would have thought someone like Hongjoong would stumble into the doors of the sweet establishment. Without even realizing, that day you starting losing your faith in god, if you even had any. It was just a way of life to you and you didn’t know any better back then but now you explore the world day by day with your sweet lover boy and god definitely didn’t have anything to do with that.

“W-what are you doing?”  As if you couldn’t sound any more cute than you did right this minute. His eyes darkened, sucking in a breath as he watched you squirm. Your doe eyes watched him intensely, your hand snaking down to grab his, holding him still. Did you really not know what teasing was? Then again you didn’t know most things until he came along. When he first kissed you, he still remembers the shocked expression you made and how you slapped his chest slightly saying ‘We aren’t supposed to do that.’ But now all you do is kiss him. Morning kisses, hello and goodbye kisses. If you walked into the room he would grab you for a smooch. He loved kissing you and even though you would not admit it, you craved them too.

“I’m just wanting to touch you, Darling.” His soft voice sent shivers down your spine. You gulped, not knowing what exactly he meant. You gave him a confused expression, and it finally clicked in his head that you didn’t know what was going on. “Can I touch you, baby?”

You smiled letting his hand slip into your own, tilting your head “But you are touching me Joongie.”

Oh fuck, you look so goddamn cute and it made him want to pin you to the couch and fuck you into next week. He wanted, needed to teach you this side of life you didn’t know about. Take it slow, Hongjoong repeated to himself, placing his hand free hand on top of yours. He closed the distance between your lips but just kept enough space to let you pick whether or not to actually kiss him. And when you gave him a simple smile before sealing your soft lips on his, he took it as a green light to push you further.

“I mean touch sensually...” He peaked your lips again. “Touch you where the ache it.” He kissed the corner of your mouth as both of his hands got free, letting his finger graze your top thigh before slowly slipping towards your inner thigh. Your eyes never left his, eyebrows knotting in anticipation. Your brain was screaming at you, saying what you were about to do was sinful and bad. But your body craved to see what he could do. Could he really help take that ache that pulses in your stomach? The idea of giving yourself to Hongjoong more than frightened you… it excited you.

“What are you gonna do to me?” You didn’t mean to sound so seductive but Hongjoong drank every word you spoke. And the way you said it would have any man eating out of your hand, yet you didn’t even notice. Merely thinking you were simply asking an innocent question.

“Oh, Darling.” He dipped his fingers further up your thigh helping you open your legs without a thought, too focused on what Hongjoong might say. And he thought, for maybe two point five seconds on what he might say. Does he ease in and take it slow like his brain has been repeating for the past month or does he just drop his filter and see how you react?

He chose to fuck around and find out….

“I want to put my fingers deep inside your pussy.” Your eyes widened at the lewd words that spilled off your lover's tongue. “I want to know what it feels like to fuck you, make love to you.” His fingertips graze your covered core and it makes you jump, whimpering out. You gripped his wrist trying to stop him but you didn’t move him away, too curious to see what he’d do. “Would you let me see what your cunt feels like angel?”

“Y-you can't make l-love to me yet. We aren't married.” That was what you took out of his whole confession, man has got his work cut out for him. He had to laugh a low deep grumble making you shiver. His fingers were still playing with your covered core, trying to pull at the buttons of your pants. “We haven't decided if we want kids yet.”

“Kids?” Okay, now he was the one confused, “Who said anything about kids, darling?”

“Y-you know…” damn now you feel stupid, of course, this was another thing your parents taught you wrong. You tried to learn things on your own, only just recently finding out what a male privates were called. You felt so small in this outside world and you tried your hardest not to let Hongjoong see just how closed off you were growing up but sometimes it slips out, just like now. And the only way to get out of this was to explain yourself. “You only mate to have bare children. No pleasure or love… it’s a ritual that a married couple preform to conceive kids.”

Hongjoong tried to not look shocked but then again he really wasn't. When he found out you were living in cult-like conditions he did everything in his power to get you out of that situation whether you liked him to or not. He couldn’t just leave such a sweet thing like you to be devoured by the jaws of a sick bastard who played a so-called god. “My sweet, sweet baby. There is so much more to love-making than bearing children. Do you want me to show you?”

He gave you one last slow kiss, holding your cheek with his free hand keeping you in place. You sigh in the kiss, feeling a kind of relief and safety. All he wanted to do was keep you comfortable and not do anything you were unsure of. But now you wanted to give back. Give back to his kindness and understanding. You wanted to know, to know what it felt like to be with someone completely. But your mind kept playing the idea that you were betraying your god. You were fighting an inner battle and you didn’t know what to do. “Y-You can s-show me Joongie.”

He shifted his weight, turning to look at you straight on. He placed both hands on either side of your face before asking again. “I need you to say yes baby. Do you want this? Are you sure?”

“Yes.” You might have said that a little too quickly for your liking but Joong. Oh, he’d been waiting for this moment and it couldn’t be any more perfect. Grabbing your hips he pulls you up onto his lap. Your face was flustered a bright red. Your hands instantly gripped onto his shoulders as his own snakes under your loose top, feeling your bare tummy. He kisses you on your lips, then a peck on your cheek, then jaw. Before moving down to your neck. His hot tongue licked a long strip against your skin making you shiver, digging your fingers into his shirt. He chuckled feeling your hips wiggle, trying to subconsciously relieve the ache.  He held your hip with his right hand, helping you move slowly, letting you take control, for the moment. He wanted to ease you in, let you find your rhythm. “J-joongie I f-feel.”

“Feel what baby? What do you feel?” He pulled away to look at you, using his free hand to slowly move down your navel before landing just above your core. Your eyes stayed closed, rocking your hips slowly. Your clit was brushing against your jeans just right and it was sending your head into a spin. You didn’t know how to describe the feeling but it felt, good. Right, almost. And then he cupped your pussy making you jump.

“I feel hot… I think I-I’m sweating d-down….” You looked down, seeing his hand holding your core. He looked down to, knowing exactly what you were saying. Chuckling against he rubbed his two middle fingers along your covered slit.

“It’s not sweat Darling. It’s called cum. It comes out of you when you’re feeling good.” he continued to rub you making your mouth fall agape slightly. He leaned towards your ear kissing the top of your neck before whispering. “and it tastes delicious too. Can you give me a taste baby?”

You hesitantly nodded, “Yes, but is…” He looks at you in your wide eyes. “ W-what about g-gods way…”

“Fuck god. He doesn’t know a good thing if it was staring at him in the face.” His voice was laced with aggression. But his lips against your neck were soft, gentle. “Forget god, baby. It’s just you and me.”

You and me…. Something he has said to you since you met. Sneaking out he always said it was you and him against the world and the day you had packed your bag―with what little you had―and left while your parents were out you knew he’d be there for you. You still wonder if your parents even read the note you left them. But then again they most likely would have thrown it away, not caring for a sinner like you anymore. “I don’t know if I c-can…Hongjoong…”

He stopped. For a moment. Anger was surging through him. Your family fucked you up so much and all he wanted to was find each and every one of those preachers and kill them where they stood. He wanted to protect you, hold you. Love you. “Yes you can angel. You can do anything you want. You are so strong.”

And with that you kiss him, taking in a big breath in through your nose. He pulled away first making you chase his lips but as his body sinks onto the floor, you watch with curiosity. He sat on his knees, never breaking eye contact with you. His hands find the buttons on your jean shorts, helping you loosen them before ultimately slipping them off. Everything was happening so fast yet so slowly as well. your body was shaking, feeling exposed without your pants but as his gaze switched from yours to your core between your legs, you couldn’t help but whimper. “Hongjoong…”

“It’s okay baby I’m going to make you feel good. I promise.” He lent in pushing your panties to the sides and finally getting a good view of your soaked cunt. “Fuck, you are so pretty baby.” he wasted no time in licking a long strip along your folds making you make a high-pitched noise that was music to Hongjoong’s ears. He got to work, suckling, biting and tending to your core. You had thrown your head back against the couch, grabbing your lover's thick dark hair and spreading your legs wider for him without realizing. A strange feeling was brewing in your lower tummy and you couldn’t find the words to explain it. You were feeling all types of emotions, happiness, guilt, hatred, lust and everything in between. And then Hongjoong took his fingers against your core making you jump.

“Hongjoong, w-wait…” But your lover didn’t listen cause he knew you’d just start talking about god again. He needed you to listen to him and if words weren't going to work. Maybe a demonstration would. His mouth cages your clit while his finger begins to sink into you slowly and you felt electricity surge through you. Everything you did for your parents. The little girl that “raised right” was slowly slipping away and it was terrifying you. Tears started prickling down your face, feeling so good but so guilty at the same time. Why did your parents have to do what they did to you? Why couldn’t they have raised you normally? Were you could make your own mistakes. You hated them. You hated everything. Everything except Hongjoong. “G-god…”

You didn’t know what you wanted to say but you knew he wasn’t going to listen, in fact, he snapped instead making a chill pool inside you. “God isn’t her baby, now let me have my meal. Got that?”

“Yes sir…” You cried, feeling him put another finger inside you.

“Fuck say that again…” He groan against your clit.

“S-Sir…” You obeyed, feeling his fingers thrusted in a harsh pace making you scream out, tears pouring out of you more and more with your mouth spilling out saliva onto your chin.

“That’s right baby. This is my pussy yeah? I get to play with her―Fuck her whenever I want. Do you understand?” He chuckled, nibbling on your puffy nub.

“Y-yes sir. Please, have me whenever you’d like. I’ll be good. I promise. Fffuuck!!” You’ve never sworn before but it felt like a word needed for this occasion. A band in you snapped, feeling yourself clench around Joong’s fingers. He slowed down until he came to a stop, but not pulling his fingers out just yet. He had to see your face, the way your nose scrunched up when his thumb pressed firmly on your clit and fingers slowly slipping from inside you helping your ride out. Hearing you swear was single-handedly the sexiest thing you could do. He stood up quickly, grabbing your wrist so he could pull you up making you stand. But your legs didn’t want to work so he hand to hold you up.

“Don’t worry baby. You’re always good baby. My sweet girl.” he pecked your nose making you smile. He rubbed away some of your tears with his left thumb. You both stood there for a moment letting you catch your breath. But without you noticing he undid his belt and jean buttons, shaking his jeans off. You only then noticed when a hard object poked your tummy. Looking down you see his appendage under his boxers. You had to gulp worried as to how it might fit inside you. He licked his lips watching you inspect him, he had no shame, slipping his thumb under the band of his boxer before pulling it down, letting his cock spring free.

You gasped seeing his dick whack his navel. Its red angry tip leaking out some pre-cum and twitching just at the thought you’d touch it. You looked back at his eyes with wide doe eyes, almost silently asking what was going to happen next. He swung you both around so his back was facing the couch before taking a seat on it. He pulled you along letting you take a seat on his lap. The feeling of his hot cock against your pussy made you clench around nothing. Your nerves were shot and you were shaking with a mixture of fear and excitement.

“Ready?” He simply asked, snaking his hands under your top tugging on the fabric slightly. You nodded, answering with a small yes before he took the end of your shirt and ripped it down the middle. You gasped, moaning without thinking. Your chest was suddenly exposed to him, leaving you completely bare for him. He had a sadistic smirk painting his features, leaning down he licked your left nipple making you whimper out his name. Your hands found his shoulders, letting him attack your chest with harsh red and purple marks. His hands that layed on your hips moved behind you. One grabbed a hand full of your ass while the other one glided toward your asshole. He put pressure against your hole and it made you wiggle in his grasp. He lived for your reaction.

“Sensitive Doll? I wonder what I would feel like to fuck this tight little ass too? Hmm.” His dirty words made you feel filthy in the best way. His thumb slipped into your puckered hole for a moment sending a new feeling through your system. Anything he did was pushing your buttons correctly. It was like he knew your body better than you did. “You’re just a dirty girl, aren’t you? Wanting to be fucking in the ass? Bet I could fuck this pussy while I have a pretty dildo up your ass. Hmm. Would you like that? You want to be my little slut?”

“I-I’m not dirty…I..I..” You didn’t know what to say feeling conflicted in his words. But he couldn’t care, your body was reacting perfectly to his words and that’s all he needed.

“Don’t worry baby. I’ll fuck you nice and full. And then we can go shopping. I plan on showing you all the pleasure you’d been missing out on.” his laugh was lewd, almost cruel sounding and you couldn’t help but moan in response. He lifted you up slowly without you taking much notice, only focusing on his finger thrusting in your asshole softly. It was only when a sharp pain started forming in your front you snapped your eyes open looking down.

“F-fuck…Hongjoong!!” he helped you sink down slowly until you had him completely nestled inside your aching cunt. You were crying again. But it was different this time. The pain was only slight, you actually didn’t mind the pain. But it was the value of what you had just done. Wrapping your arms around his shoulders you sobbed. Crying from all the frustration. All the anger you had against your parents. Against your community. You had now completely turned your back on the god you once worshipped. All your life learning certain things was for nothing.

“Shhhh. It’s okay.” he rubbed your back, feeling a tingle in his gut. God, you felt so good, your pussy was clenching him perfectly but he felt sorry for you. You had lived only one way and he came in and changed your life in a blink of an eye and it wouldn't had been easy one bit for you.

He had made a promise to himself that night. While his hips started to move and your body started to stutter with him. While his lips were on yours or sucking sharply on your neck. While his hands smacked your plump ass helping you ride his cock at a desperate pace. And when he bent you over the edge of the couch so he could fuck you from behind while you creamed all over his cock for the fourth time. He was going to love you, now and forever. He was going to teach you new things every day and always make sure you were the best version of yourself. And he was going to also fuck you in every room of this house…

That last part might of just been more for his sake but it’s the thought that counts.

- ♥︎

[meespresso14]

Unexpected (Part 2)

Rating: 18+ MINORS DNI

Warnings: mentions of sex, pregnancy, nausea, vomiting, medical issues.

Once things settled down and the hostages were rescued safely with only minor injuries and mental anguish, Hondo decided it was time to pull Luca. The team could finish up without him, it would be alright. Luca was working with Tan and Street. Hondo sighed, getting himself together. The adrenaline was still rushing through all of their veins. He walked over to the group.

“Luca, can we talk for a minute?”

The color drained from Luca’s face, his classic smile fading from his lips. Hondo noticed him swallow hard, his Adam’s apple bobbing. “Yeah, boss. What’s up?”

Deep down inside, every bad scenario was running through Luca’s head. Was it you? Was it his parents? 

Hondo’s eyes panned over to Tan and Street before they panned back to Luca. Everyone was wearing a worried look. 

“It’s Y/N. Annie was on her way to the hospital with her. She passed out at home. I was waiting until things calmed down to pull you out as soon as I could.”

Luca’s blue eyes instantly filled with concern before he shook his head, attempting to pass by Hondo. “I gotta get out of here, man. Like now.”

“Listen, listen—I know, Luca.”, Hondo grabbed his shoulders, trying to center him. 

Luca was fighting back tears—he couldn’t show his emotions. That’s not how this worked. He was taught to be tough—even as a child. 

“Just be safe about it, man. She needs you.”, Hondo eyed Luca.

Luca couldn’t meet Hondo’s eyes. He only stared past him, however, Hondo could see the tears pooling in Luca’s deep blue eyes. He hated breaking bad news to his teammates. It seemed like only yesterday when Annie had her stroke and he had to tell Deacon. It was the worst part of being the team leader. 

“I know.”, Luca breathed, voice barely above a whisper.

He rubbed his hand over his face. “What happened to her?”

Hondo shook his head. “Captain Cortez didn’t give me any other details.”

“I gotta get down there. I need to see her.”

“I know. One of us can go with you—if you want.”, Hondo added.

Luca nodded. “Okay.”

Hondo nodded, finally feeling better about Luca leaving. It was decided that Deacon would accompany Luca since Annie was at the hospital anyway. Hondo told them both to be careful and to keep the team updated on your condition. Luca didn’t even take time to change out of all his tactical gear. He just cared about seeing you—making sure you were okay. Deacon noticed him shifting in the seat nervously. 

Luca felt like a cat on a hot tin roof. His face scrunched nervously and Deacon could tell he was spiraling. 

“You okay, man?”

Luca looked over at Deacon. “Honestly…..no.”, he sighed.

Deacon nodded. “It’s okay not to be okay. I was beside myself when Annie was sick.”

Luca nodded. “I’m just thinking of everything that could be wrong with her.”

“It could be something minor.”

Luca scoffed. “Knowing my luck—no way. I mean she’s the best thing to ever happen to me, Deac. She understands me.”

Deacon kept driving, determined to get Luca there as fast as he could. “I know.”

Deacon didn’t check his phone after texting Annie that he was on his way with Luca. Traffic was horrible as per usual in LA. Deacon was a good driver, used to dealing with the congested highway. 

“I could have driven.”, Luca grumbled, crossing his arms and shifting in the seat for the thousandth time. 

“Sorry boss’s orders.”, Deacon shrugged playfully, a soft smirk crossing his lips.

Luca slumped over against the door, his anxiety getting the best of him. He thought he would handle stress better than this. And to be honest, he was a little angry at himself for getting so worked up. But this wasn’t just anything—this was you, the love of his life. He had never felt this way about another woman. He was going to marry you. And soon, especially after this. If everything was alright with you. His mind was racing with possibilities, going through any and every scenario.

Deacon knew what he was doing. He had done the exact thing when Annie was sick. He knew Luca felt guilty about leaving you and going to work. Deacon weaved in and out of traffic in an attempt to get to the hospital faster. Luca huffed and puffed, silently cursing the traffic and hitting the dashboard of his truck. 

After what felt like a hundred years, they finally pulled up to the emergency room entrance. Luca hardly gave Deacon time to shift his truck into the park before he was jumping out. Deacon threw his hands up, making sure he was parked at least halfway decent before jumping out of Luca’s truck with the keys and running to catch up to Luca. 

Luca cleared the automatic doors, instantly going to the registration desk. 

“Can I help you sir?”

“My fiancee is here.”, Luca threw his hands down on the desk, tapping them nervously. 

“Your name?”

“Dominique Luca. I should be on her paperwork.” 

“What’s her name?”

Luca gave them your name. He wished in that moment you shared his. He wished he could call himself your husband. 

“She’s in room three. I’ll take you both back there.”

Luca nodded as he looked back at Deacon. 

“Want me to follow?”

“Yeah, man. It’s fine.”

Deacon nodded, imagining that Luca needed the emotional support. The registrar opened the door and met Luca on the other side before the door to the main emergency room opened. Nurses were running around like crazy, the desk right in the middle of the room. The registrar talked quickly to a nurse and she nodded, looking at him. Luca forgot he had left his SWAT stuff on. 

“Officer Luca?”, the nurse asked, holding her clipboard.

Luca nodded. 

“Your fiancée is in room three. The doctor will be in shortly to give you an update.”

“Great. Thanks.”

“No problem, follow me.”, she smiled softly and part of Luca wondered why she was smiling when his entire world felt like it was falling apart. 

Part of him felt angry but he decided to hold it together. Deacon was behind him as they snaked their way through the emergency department to room three. The nurse grabbed the blue curtain, pulling it back.

“I have a visitor.”, she sing-songed.

Luca held his breath. Were you awake? All these questions were running through his head and he was finally going to get his answers. There were a lot of sounds in the emergency room from young children crying, people moaning in pain, and all the alarms going off constantly. But it was like everything went silent as he waited for the nurse to move back to reveal you. His mouth pursed open, trying to find the right words to say. 

You were lying there with your eyes open, a small smile on your face. “Hey babe.”

Annie was beside you at the head of your bed, holding your hand. Annie was a great friend and you were very thankful for your SWAT family. Annie smiled, realizing Luca and Deacon had arrived. She let go of your hand and moved to give Luca room but he wasn’t waiting. He rushed over to you, tears forming in his ocean-blue eyes.

“Hey, baby. Are you feeling okay?”, he immediately asked, taking you in his arms. 

Your heart monitor was beeping in the background but neither of you was paying attention to anything but one another. He kissed your head, brushing through your hair before you both smiled at one another. 

“I’m so sorry for leaving you this morning.”

“Stop that.”, you whispered lightly. “Don’t beat yourself up. It’s not your fault.”

“It is—I should have stayed home with you. You needed me.”

“Luca.”

“Baby, I would have never forgiven myself if something happened to you.”

“But I’m gonna be okay.” 

You smiled softly as you touched noses before sharing a small, soft kiss. Luca thought for a moment that he would never get this opportunity again. Your lips felt like heaven and he was so relieved. 

“So everything is going to be okay?”

“Well—mostly.”

“Mostly?”, Luca questioned, concern evident in his voice. 

“Sit down, babe.”, you rubbed his muscular arm gently. 

This was it. Luca felt his heart plummet into his stomach. This was the moment you were going to tell him—you were going to give him the bad news. Luca swallowed hard, his legs beginning to feel like jello. He was never this easily rattled. But this was you. It was a whole different ball game, it was okay to be vulnerable. A lesson you had taught him. Annie helped by scooting a chair closer to the edge of the bed so he could sit down beside you. If only he knew what she did. 

Luca took a seat, immediately grabbing your hand. Just as he did, the doctor pulled the curtain back, getting everyone’s attention. 

“Officer Luca?”

Luca looked up at him, and the doctor immediately extended his hand. Luca took it, shaking his hand firmly. “Glad you could join us. I’ve already talked to your fiancee’ but she wanted you present as well.”

“Sorry—my job is a little demanding.”, Luca laughed nervously. 

Luca’s blue eyes panned over to you, still managing to give you a soft smile as he squeezed your hand. His heart felt like it was going to beat out of his chest. 

“We’ll be outside.”, Deacon breathed softly, grabbing Annie’s hand and exiting the room as quietly as they both could. 

“Alright, well. First of all, her iron level and blood pressure were low upon arrival to the emergency room which aided in her passing out at home. We have already given her an iron infusion along with some fluids but are admitting her overnight for observation. She will possibly need another infusion next week depending on the results of her blood work. On to other news,”, he smiled softly.

Luca was confused while he was smiling. 

“Both of these were results of another finding.”

“And that is?”, Luca questioned bravely.

He needed answers. 

“Congratulations Officer Luca. Your fiancée is pregnant. HCG levels are perfect for an estimated four weeks pregnant.”

Luca’s eyes widened before he turned to you. Did he really just hear what he thought he heard? It was the sentence he had waited forever to hear. 

“Pregnant?”, Luca repeated. 

You smirked softly. “Pregnant.”, you whispered.

“What? Babe!”, he exclaimed, a relaxed feeling finally washing over him as his lips curved into a smile and his blue eyes softened before he immediately took you into his arms.

You giggled lightly, wrapping your arms around him. It felt nice to be in his arms and you closed your eyes, taking in this feeling. You always did—just in case there was a day he didn’t get to come home. You hated to even think about the possibility but you knew that was part of what you signed up for. You always prayed for his safety along with his teammates. He pulled back to look at you, tears in his eyes. 

“I’m really gonna be a dad?”

You nodded before both of you laughed easily. 

“Congratulations to both of you. We will let you know as soon as we get you a room upstairs.”, the doctor smiled before leaving. 

Luca turned back to look at you. “I can’t believe it—but I thought you wanted to get married first.”

You shrugged easily. “Life sometimes throws curveballs.”

Luca smiled, rubbing your cheek softly. “I never thought this moment was ever going to happen for me. I thought I was always going to be stuck as Uncle Luca.”

You both laughed before you began to speak. “You’re an amazing uncle, so I just know you’re going to be an amazing dad.”

Luca smiled brightly at the compliment. “I’m so happy.”

“Me too.”, you began. “But I’m not gonna lie I was a little anxious to tell you.”

“Me?”

You nodded again. “It’s just nerve-wracking. I mean I didn’t know if you wanted this right now.”

Luca sighed, shifting in the chair lightly. “I get it. I know you wanted to get married first. I mean—I know we weren’t being safe like we should but we weren’t exactly trying either.”

You giggled at the use of his terminology. “True.”

“Deacon and I even had this conversation this morning—and I thought there was no way in this world you were pregnant.”

“Me either, honestly.”

“But I’m thrilled. I can’t wait to be a dad—I can’t wait for you to start getting a little bump.”, Luca touched your flat stomach. 

You placed your hand over his. 

“Maybe we should move our wedding up.”, you smirked. 

“Sounds good. You tell me a date and we will make it happen, babe.”

You all shared another kiss before you began grinning widely. 

“Maybe we should let Deacon and Annie back in.”

“Yeah, maybe.”, Luca laughed. 

Luca let go of your hand just long enough to walk to the curtain and open it, telling Annie and Deacon they could come in. They followed him back inside the small curtained room. You could only hope that your and Luca’s relationship could be like Deacon and Annie’s—maybe even better. So far, he had exceeded every expectation. Deacon smirked at Luca and you were unsure if Annie had clued him in. 

“So Luca, was I right? Is there a chance we will have a fourth-generation SWAT member?”

Luca smirked back, elbowing Deacon playfully. “Maybe.”

You and Annie looked at one another, laughing while not being surprised by their horseplay. 

“Yeah, you were right Deac. I’m gonna be a dad.”

There were obvious tears pooling in his blue eyes and Deacon couldn’t help but smile as he pulled Luca in for a hug, patting his back. Annie couldn’t help but give a soft smile before her eyes panned over to you. You couldn’t help but notice the tears beginning to pool in your own eyes watching how excited Luca was. This was better than anything you could have imagined. 

“Well, guess it’s my turn to be an uncle now.”, Deacon smirked. 

"How long until we can tell the rest of the team?", Annie chimed in. 

You looked at Luca and he looked back at you, softly caressing his thumb over your hand. 

"What do you think, babe?"

You giggled softly before noticing Hondo, Chris, Jim, and Tan walking through the emergency room through the small slit in the curtain. "I'm thinking soon."

[brooooswriting]

Reasons

Natasha Romanoff x reader (Angst to fluff)

Set after black widow movie, talk of the red room, torture etc.

A/n: I haven’t written for Nat in a while but this came up in my head and I couldn’t stop myself.

“I promise she's cheating on me” Natasha whined to Clint who sat on his bed, ice pack on his knees after a long mission. He was gone for about 2 months meaning that Nat couldn’t talk to him, so she kept her problems inside until he came back.

“Nat, she loves you. Why the hell would she cheat on you?” He asks groaning, you only ever had eyes for her. Even before your three years relationship, all you ever saw was Natasha.

And it was true, you loved her more than your own life. There is nothing you wouldn’t do for her, you would destroy yourself for her which is what you were doing at the moment.

You barely left your lab at the moment, constantly being locked up in there with your new lab assistant, Sarah. Tony hired her for you and the redhead hated her the moment she met her, she was trying to steal you from her and her suspicions confirmed when you locked away with her.

“I promise you it’s Sarah, she’s stealing my girlfriend. I bet they are doing it right now” by now she couldn’t even hold back her tears, they were streaming down her face wildly. Clint sat up and wrapped her up in a hug to calm her down.

“How about this, try to get her to talk tonight no matter how late and if she doesn’t wanna talk, if she’s ignoring it. Go to bed and end it in the morning” the archer said, his hand stroking her back while she nodded into the crook of his neck.

That night at 2 a.m you finally came back to your room. The day has been exhausting and you couldn’t wait to lay behind Nat and cuddle into her, you missed her terribly but everything you did, you did for her. What you didn’t expect was your girlfriend awake sitting in your bed with her upper body against the headrest. “What are you doing awake love? It’s late” you whispered as if you could wake somebody up as you got rid of your shoes.

“Yeah, it is late and you haven’t been back at dinner time again! Where were you?!” She hissed at you, the glare making you cower.

“In my lab, I’ve been working” you explained with a soft smile changing into your pjs to finally go to bed.

“I wonder with who. Let me guess Sarah was there too huh?” The moment she said your lab assistants name her voice was filled with venom. She’s always had a problem with the blonde and you never knew why.

“Yeah, that’s what she gets paid for. Can we not talk about this right now? I wanna sleep, with you in my arms” you mumbled as you move towards her, crawling under the blanket.

“Stay away! You don’t wanna talk about it, fine. You do not touch me” she gritted out, turning away from you. You sighed, you really wish you could tell her but you couldn’t. Not yet. So you turned towards her, not touching her. Just starting at her back as you fell asleep.

The next morning you were gone when she was awake so she got Clint and started packing her things. You weren’t gonna come back until late at night and until then she’d be gone. She’d move into Clint’s room until she figured out what else to do.

What she didn’t expect was for you to come back to your room at 9 a.m with flowers in hand. “Nat? What’s going on? Why are you packing your stuff?” You questioned, flowers still in hand when she glared at you.

“We are over. Go fuck with Sarah, I mean, y/n be honest. This is what you wanted! You cheat, you loose me. I’m doing what you didn’t have the balls for. I’m ending this. I hope you’re happy with her” she spit out, speed walking past you. You were about to follow her but Clint stood in your way, blocking your path.

“Clint, come on. I gotta follow her” you said, trying to push past him but he refused. “Barton, you know I wouldn’t cheat on her” you tried again but no luck.

“I thought the same but now? Now I want you to stay away from her” he said pushing you back a bit. You took that as a sign to leave, turning to go back to your lab, the flowers thrown on the floor.

You came back to the lab with tears streaming down your face, anger fuming inside of you. “Are you alright y/n? You didn’t wanna be back unt- oh, you’re crying” Sarah said, coming over with a tissue.

“I’m good, I-I’m managing. Natasha broke up with me” there was a moment of silence. While Sarah was desperately afraid of the redhead, she still thought the two of you were the cutest couple she knows.

“Do- do you wanna stop all this?” She asked carefully, gesturing towards your project. After a second of silence you spoke up again.

“No, no. This isn’t just for her. This can help thousand of others too. So let’s finish this alright? How long is this going to take? Half a day max. We made it too far to stop” you explained as you stood up.

After 7 hours 98% of the tests came back positive making you break out in tears again. Sarah gave you a smile and pulled you into a hug to comfort you. “You did it y/n/n” she cheered you on, her arms still around you.

“Y/- oh my god. So what Nat said was true?! You cheated on her? With the woman Tony paid for you?” Steve growled as he walked in on you and Sarah hugging causing you to abruptly pull back. It was amazing how fast words spread in this tower because from the moment Steve left after screaming it took about 15 minutes for a fuming Wanda to come down to your lab, eyes glowing red and Yelena behind her.

“You’re dead Y/n Y/l/n” the widows sister called out and you could already feel Wanda’s energy radiating around you. This was gonna be your end. No question.

“No, wait. Please. I promise on my life that I didn’t cheat” you whimpered out as you were lifted into the air. Sarah stood in shock as you were thrown against a wall. “Wanda! Come on. Take my hand, you can feel if I’m telling the truth” the two women looked at each other for a second before Yelena nodded at the witch. So she approached your form that was sitting on the ground, leaning on the wall you were thrown against.

She took another of your hands, a red glow started to engulf them as she gave you a nod. “I never cheated on Nat, never have never will” you said looking at the woman in front of you.

“She’s telling the truth” Wanda confirmed, pulling you up as your hands were still connected.

“But then what is all of this? Why did you pull away from her? Why’d you do this?” Yelena asked desperately, in her mind she could still hear Natasha cry.

“I can’t explain right now, give me two more hours. In two hours send Nat down here please” you looked at Yelena especially, knowing that she was the one who could convince her sister to do this.

“Why?” Was the only thing you were met with. You sighed, this was gonna be complicated.

“I can’t tell you Yelena, Tasha sees right through you. I can’t have that happen, not after I nearly destroyed our relationship because of it” you explained, tears welling up in your eyes at the thought of your shattered relationship.

“Then no can do” was the answer you received, making you groan. You should have guessed that this wasn’t gonna be easy.

“How about I tell Wanda and she can tell you if it’s worth it or now” after Yelena agreed you leaned forward and whispered into the witches ear, her heart melting at what you told her. Once her eyes were brimming with tears she pulled back and nodded to Yelena.

“She’ll be here in exactly two hours” were the last words the woman spoke before they disappeared.

“Well, now quick” Sarah laughed and you two started to work with full speed.

“You know I might have to fire you right? To save my relationship” you mumbled as you read through the latest updates F.R.I.D.A.Y ran for you, making small changes.

“I know and it’s alright. I’d do the same thing if I ever love someone as much as you love her. I mean I’d be happy if you don’t have to but I get it. Oh, and I ordered flowers, Champaign and chocolate for the two of you” she smiled as she read through some of the statistics.

“I hope so too but I’d do anything for her”

Two hours later the lights were dimmed, the champagne was in the fridge and chocolate on the side table. You were changed into a trouser and a top instead of an oversized shirt and joggers. Now you were just waiting for the love of your life.

“You better have a really good reason to have Yelena get me down here!” Her voice could be heard before she could be seen. Her eyes were a bit red, her voice a bit rough and her posture everything but relaxed.

“I do, I wanna tell you and show you what I’ve been doing down here. Because it definitely wasn’t cheating, love” she tensed up even more at the nickname making you cringe. It was a habit after two years.

“Don’t call me that” was the only answer you received.

“Okay. Im sorry. Do you remember our mission 8 months ago? After you ended the red room and one of our enemies decided to- you know?”

“Yeah”

Flashback

“And what do you think the world would say about all of this, huh? Black widow. What would they say about your graduation ritual and the training you went through? What would she say?” He pointed at you. Before either of you could do anything, something was attached to both of your heads and suddenly you saw everything through Natasha’s eyes.

“Nooo, please don’t. Please!! I promise this won’t distract me” young Natasha screamed and suddenly you felt a sharp pain at your left cheek. The man had slapped you hard enough to make your head turn.

“You will sit through this and you’ll remember this pain every damn time you disobey me or get distracted” the man said and suddenly you were strapped to an O.R. Table, your stomach was cut open with barely any medication making you scream in pain. Somewhere there you blacked out from the pain. When you woke up again there was a jar in front of you, everything they pulled out of you was in that jar.

“You’re now a widow. This will remind you that you are nothing more than that” was the last thing you remembered before Steve finally saved you.

To say that the two of you weren’t okay after that for a while wasn’t a surprise to anyone. You hung onto each other, mostly staying in your room always having some kind of physical contact. There was a lot of crying, a lot sleeping and a lot of mental pain. After a while things went back to normal.

“What about that?” She finally asked, shaking the memory of the mission off.

“After that I couldn’t stop thinking about it, about what they took from you, about through how much pain you went and how broken you looked when you told me that you can’t have kids. Something you’ve always wished for” you had planed the whole speech for about a month now but you were still nervous and the fact that Natasha was mad at you didn’t make it easier.

“So what? You called me down here to make me live through all that again?” She hissed and you had to hold an eye roll back.

“No, I didn’t. And you remember when we had to foster that 6 year old girl 5 months ago?”

“Yeah, Mia. We kept her for 3 weeks, she was cute” the redhead said, looking at her feet.

“No matter how many times you’ve told me that you didn’t need to have kids and that you were fine I couldn’t help but not believe you. I want you to be happy and I would do everything for you which is why I was down here. Constantly.” You explained further hoping that she’d look at you again.

“And you thought cheating on me would make me happy?” You took a second to take a deep breath before you stretched out your hand.

“I didn’t cheat. Please give me the benefit of the doubt and let me show you. Please, I’ve been working on this for months, for you.”

Your pleading tone was what made her give in and carefully take your hand as you pulled her along to oke of your microscopes, gently pushing her in front of you. She took that as a sign to look into it as you stood behind her, one hand on her waist. “What am I looking at?” She asked rather bored, not having any interest in the scientific stuff at the moment.

“Something that will involve into this” you told her as you pulled her further into your lab where she saw a hologram from an uterus. “This is a “

“I know what this is y/n” this time she rolled her eyes as she looked at the hologram.

“You kinda do, but not really. This is a uterus I made, it’s made from Stem cells and I can plant it into anybody, there it can keep growing to the point where it is a part of them and they’ll be able to have kids. I mean right now I specified it to the way the red room removed them but I could change that. This might not fix the world but I hope that it will help thousands of women who had to suffer like you did. And I hope it helps you” your voice was shaky at the end of your monologue. To some it may have seemed as if you were just out of breath but the redhead knew you better, she knew that it were your emotions that got a hold of you.

“Wh-What does that mean?” She asked, her voice trembling and her eyes glossy as one hand rested on her stomach. The spy was anything but stupid so you knew that she got what you said but she just didn’t wanna believe it.

“It means that after the treatment you can be a mother, Natasha and I just know that you’ll be the best mom ever”

Silence. That’s all there was for a long moment. The second you realized that she wasn’t going to say something about it you took the turn you hoped you wouldn’t need. “I mailed Bruce the instructions so he can do the treatment with you. The first few days after the treatment you might be very emotional, so make sure the team is there for you or your future partner. Every detail is in the files, they’re under your name, the code is your birthday. If you don’t want Bruce to do it with you I left a document with names of people who would do it with you” you told her as you tapped on one of the tablets.

“More”

“What?” You asked as you tried to piece her word together with that she meant.

“Show me More” you nodded and led her to another corner of your lab.

“F.R.I.D.A.Y. open Natasha 3.1 alpha” you told the A.I who immediately started. A picture of a blonde woman showing on one of the screens, her stomach showing a small bump. “This is Alia, she was a widow too, she escaped just like you. She wanted to have child for a while, but they didn’t let her adopt. Not everybody could wipe the blood out is what they told her, so I told her that I could try this on her, she could be the first one. She’s 4 months pregnant now and the baby looks awesome” you told her, watching her as she stared at the screen.

“How’d you find her?” Natasha asked as she skipped through the pictures you had of the woman, stopping at the ultrasound. Her mouth slightly ajar.

“Your mother hooked me up once I told her about my project” you explained walking to stand behind her slightly to the left so you could look over her shoulder.

“You talk to my mother?” You could see her surprised look through the screen making you chuckle.

“Yeah, I talk to your whole family”

“Even though they make fun of your Russian and are extremely exhausting?” She asked, slightly turning her head.

“Well, they’re important to you so that meant that they’re important to me too. And I hoped for them to become my family too one day so” you explained giving her a small smile as you stepped back. “F.R.I.D.A.Y Next please” you said as Natasha turned around to you.

Suddenly the room got darker and soft music started to play, better said Nats favorite music making you freeze.

“Congratulations on finally telling her miss y/l/n. Here are your things” F.R.I.D.A.Y presented the champagne, the chocolate, the flowers and a small ring box making Natasha’s heart skip a beat.

“No, F.R.I.D.A.Y. wrong document” you rushed out but the damage was already done as you saw Nat focus on the box. “I’m so sorry, I’ll get this out of your way. I didn’t plan it like this. Shit” you rambled and kicked a carton that was on the ground out of pure frustration.

“Y-you wanted to marry me?” She mumbled as she watched your back while you tried to gather your thoughts.

“Want” was the only thing you said as you turned to see the redhead with the box in her hand. “I wanted to marry you immediately after that mission 8 months ago just to reassure you that I wasn’t leaving but I thought that that might have given the wrong impression. I was scared that you would have felt pressured to say yes”

“You did all of this for me?” She asked still trying to comprehend everything that happened. You gave her a timid nod, shoving your hands in your front pockets. “And you didn’t stop once I broke up with you?” This time you shook your head no, with a small smile. “I’m an idiot aren’t I?” She asked with a sad smile. You shrugged before shaking your head no.

“No, no matter how good my intentions were I neglected you and made you feel bad about yourself, something I promised to never do so it’s on me. But if you let me I’d like to make it up to you” you couldn’t comprehend the fact that the spy was running into your arms full speed until your ass met the ground with her on top of you. She grinned down at you before pressing her lips to yours. “I’m guessing that’s an I can?” She nodded before kissing you again.

Once you were back on your feet you could see all the avengers and Sarah standing at your door. “Ask her” Sarah mumbled but you quickly shook your head making her frown. “Do it now, or I’ll do it for you” she threatened making you flip her off before getting the box.

“I know this might not be the best moment and I actually planned all of this very very differently but that doesn’t change that you’re the love of my life and no matter if you want a family or not, I want you for the rest of my life. Natasha Alianovna Romanoff will you marry me?” You asked after you got down on one knee in front of her. Her mouth hung open as you opened the box, tears streaming from her eyes.

“Yes, yes” she mumbled over and over again as she knocked you on the ground again causing everybody to laugh.

With a big smile you slid the ring on her finger and holding her hand up for your audience to see who applauded. “I love you Natasha” you mumbled into the kiss you had shared.

“I love you too”

———————————————————————————

The next day Nat got her treatment, Wanda holding her hand while you worked as careful as you could. You two decided that you’d get married, than help some widows and then you’d get pregnant and you couldn’t wait. Tony was nice enough to sponsor the whole project, ‘your wedding gift’ as he said. That was also the first time Nat hugged him.

“There, we are all done love” you said as you discarded your gloves and walked up to her to press a soft kiss to her lips.

“This is the beginning of the rest of our lives” she smiled at you making you grin. You couldn’t wait to spend the rest of your life with this woman.

“I love you”

“I love you too”

“About Sarah…”

“You can keep her y/n, I get it I misinterpreted things” she grumbled as she cuddled into your arms making it clear that you were supposed to carry her upstairs.

You were already loving the clinginess that came with the treatment.

[moonlit-imagines]

Broken Curse

Peter Parker x reader

warnings:

a/n: idk this was supposed to be an entirely different fic when i started but now its very different

prompt:

Peter always held himself back. Everyone could see it. Everyone except him.

All those wasted opportunities because of those powers, but that’s all he thought he was good for now. He could have been so much more if he didn’t dedicate himself to Spider-Man. Right now he could be in college or working a job ehere he could make a real difference. But instead, he was living all on his lonesome in some run-down apartment, a ghost of his former self.

So now no one saw him. No one saw how much he held himself back because no one ever noticed him. In his new life, he kept to himself. No people to disappoint with his lost potential, no one noticed him anymore and maybe that was for the best.

You were in his thoughts, though. Mourned daily and nightly in regret of his mistakes. He sat there connecting all those things that went wrong. From becoming Spider-Man to an Avenger, trusting people he shouldn’t have, taking shortcuts and wasting precious time. He lost you and everyone he ever loved.

What hurt him most was seeing you from time to time, but as luck would have it, you’d managed to move into his building. A fate worse than death for Peter.

“Y/N?” He asked in the hallway without realizing. A stranger had just called to you.

“I…I’m sorry, do I know you?” You chuckled, which Peter knew was a nervous habit and you were a bit uncomfortable.

“N-No. Sorry.” He paused. “I was guessing. Not guessing your name, that’d be weird. The landlord told me about a new neighbor, I haven’t seen you yet so I was assuming that was you. Y/N, right?” Peter rambled out a reasonable lie to convince you he wasn’t a stalker. Maybe he was, he didn’t know if it counted when magic spells were involved.

“Oh. I guess that makes more sense.” You shrugged. “Yes, I’m y/n…and you are..?”

“Peter. Peter Parker.” He gave an awkward introduction. “Apartment 20.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Peter.” You told him. “I hate to cut this short, but I have to do some unpacking.” You began to walk away, but Peter was desperate to keep this going. He hadn’t spoken to you in months, and although you may not know who he is in this moment, he was the boy you fell in love with and he still loved you with all his heart.

“If, uh, you need some help moving anything, I’ll be here.” He timidly offered. You stopped in your tracks and took a moment to think.

“Actually, I could use some help with some furniture. The movers just left everything in my living room.” You explained and he smiled. “What?”

“You have a living room?” He laughed and you joined in, catching that his apartment was probably a bit smaller than your own. “I can definitely help you with all that, lead the way.” He was a bit disappointed you’d accept help from a stranger so easily, but he didn’t know that something felt familiar about him. You just felt he was trustworthy and genuine. That was it.

You’d initiated some small talk while moving the couch to the correct wall, the bed frame and mattress to the bedroom, and some shelves and tables wherever they might go, maneuvering around heaps of boxes labeled with all sorts of goofy writing. He liked the “BEDROOM BULLSHIT” box the most. But as he moved around your relatively nicer apartment, he noticed a stuffed animal that had fallen on the floor. A stuffed animal he had actually gotten for you several years ago. “Hey,” he picked the little bear up, “this was just laying on the floor. Cute.” Peter commented in some unsuspecting way.

“Oh, yeah, I can’t even remember where I got that thing. I’ve had it forever, can’t bring myself to get rid of it. It’s too cute to get rid of anyways, look at him.” You reached for the bear in his hand and when your hand connected with its soft fur, you felt an overwhelming sensation, this sickness inside as your head began spinning.

“Are you okay? Y/N?” Peter urgently asked, hesitant to make any startling movements. Your gaze jolted back to him and there was a much different look in your eyes than in the moments before. Softer.

“This can’t be real.” You mumbled. “It was you all along.”

“What?” He had no idea how to respond.

“Peter Benjamin Parker.” You spoke his full name. “I love you.”

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[dc418writes]

|Hiding in Plain Sight|

✨Pairing: CEO!Curtis Everettxblack!reader

🪄Summary: Curtis has had enough

🚨: 18+ NO MINORS!, soft!dark Curtis maybe???, cheating (do not condone in real life, however for this plot…👀), mention of past adult happy fun times (everyone please be safe!), fingering (female receiving), verbal abuse, language

🎤: this is my submission for Siri’s Birthday Bonenanza! Happy belated birthday @stargazingfangirl18 !! I hope you had an amazing bday with lots of cake, presents, love, and any and everything else you desire💐🎂!!

Prompts:

Scenario: Babe is doing this for your own good

Dialogue: “Do you know how long I’ve waited for this?”

Kink Prompt: possessive!babe, squirting

Trope Prompt: scary,dangerous babe who is only soft with you (Curtis isn’t really dangerous tho, but you’ll see)

*DISCLAIMER!: I DO NOT CLAIM OWNERSHIP OF PICTURES USED as they were found via Pinterest*

At the sudden ‘click’ of the door closing, you’re startled; quickly turning towards the sound to find one of the reasons you felt the need for space from the festivities downstairs. Dressed in all black - from the button up spanning his firm chest to his impeccable slacks and polished designer shoes - it’s as if he walked straight out of GQ how dashing and handsome he looked.

Then again, when did he not?

“Didn’t mean to scare you.” His deep voice never fails to send tingles shooting down your spine. Have you embarrassingly willing to move at his command if he gave it.

“It’s okay. I-I should probably get back anyway.”

“To get ignored by your husband some more?,” he asks just as you pass him. His words make you pause with your shoulders just mere inches apart.

“Curtis..”

“He’s so busy smiling in everybody’s face and trying to be buddy-buddy with my associates, he hasn’t even noticed his own wife is gone. Then again…maybe he doesn’t want to.”

You didn’t want to come tonight. Tired from work and not in the mood to fake laugh at middle aged men who thought they were funny, you practically begged your husband to leave you home.

“You’re so fucking selfish you know that? This is my chance to make necessary connections to very important people.”

“Then you go Wes! Me being there won’t change that.”

He only kissed his teeth, tossing one of your purses at you and not caring of the scattered contents he left. “Be ready by 6 or I’ll get you ready myself.”

It was foolish to hope things would be different this time. You should know Wes would never arrive at anything having to do with business without his self proclaimed ‘good luck charm’. His trophy wife he used to sell this illusion that he was the man that had it all, so rejecting him would only hurt you.

And that’s not to say your husband didn’t deserve success - he was brilliant in his own right. It’s why Curtis himself decided to invest in Wes’ company and was his highest investor to date. But he saw past the illusion, and quickly saw the man he really was.

Which is how your complicated pairing began.

As he steps closer you hate how your body responds: eagerly ready to cave at the closest feeling of home. The bourbon - his favorite - practically being tasted in your own mouth as the smell wafts from his pink lips so close to yours. It mixes well with the spice from his cologne only making your head begin to swim and want to suffocate yourself in his neck.

His thick finger reaches out to trace the delicate gold chain on the necklace perfectly sat just below your collarbones. The small diamonds not equally spaced apart, but set in such a way it reminded you of twinkling stars in the night sky. It’s simple, but fitting for you. You were never the type for lavish jewelry that could blind someone a mile away, and from your short time together Curtis knew that.

“Knew it’d look beautiful on you,” he whispers letting the pad of his finger carry further until he was skimming your collarbone and causing you to shudder.

“I’m still married,” you practically have to force from your soul trying to stop your body from pressing against his. Stop your brain from turning to mush so he could have his way with you. Again.

His jaw ticks. “Why, I don’t know.”

“Curtis please, okay? Besides, you’re supposed to be celebrating.” He gently nods letting the rest of the brown liquor drain down his throat - your eyes shamefully following the bob of his Adams apple and missing how it felt under your lips.

“Fine,” he breathes closing the remaining space so you have no choice but to clutch his shoulders to stop from losing your footing in your heels. Not that he’d let you fall from his muscular arm around your waist. His mouth lowering impossibly closer that depending on what either of you said, your lips would brush. “Celebrate with me.”

“I-I don’t think your date would like that.” Were you angry when you saw the onyx haired beauty on his arm? Far from it. Did you guiltily wish her butt length, model-esque hair would catch fire when she passed one of the candles on the various tables so she’d have to leave? Maybe.

“Here I was thinking I was the jealous one.” And there was that smirk that briefly showed the hidden mischief in this man carved by God himself. “Yes, she’s my plus one, but would be more interested in you than me. Not that I blame her.”

“I still can’t,” you whisper letting your nose tap against his. Slowly but surely you feel yourself becoming drunk off his presence and that will to stand strong diminishing.

“Can’t or shouldn’t?”

At that you’re stuck. Now solely focused on his lips and so badly wanting - needing - to taste them again. Curtis grins realizing this himself. “My eyes are up here sweetheart.”

“Wha?” You should feel embarrassed, but as the air from his nostrils fan your face it only seems to make you needier. And when he brings his hand up to caress your cheek, there’s nothing that can stop you from leaning into his touch. Even between your legs you feel that pulse begin to grow in urgency.

“Look me in the eyes,” Curtis begins slowly, “and tell me you don’t want me. That you’re done. You’ll never hear from me again.”

You try, genuinely try to maintain eye contact but his stormy blues dilated with lust and longing only overwhelms you. Overwhelms you in that you should be good and say you don’t, leave, and act as if none of this has happened but you don’t want to. Curtis has easily become a part of you that you can’t let go and truthfully refuse to do so.

In a blink, your lips are frantically crushing against each others. His tongue smoothly, yet still eager, to reclaim your mouth after being away for so long. Your mind quickly enters that haze you only seemed to experience with him, unable to realize your body is being guided somewhere until you’re perched on the edge of a wooden desk. Your hands gripping the back of his neck while his push your pastel blue mini dress up past your hips leaving your lower half exposed to the cool air of the room.

Finally needing to breathe, his lips descend to your jaw then your neck causing you to whine his name wanting more of his mouth on yours. A quiet “shh” is the only warning you get before his hands are spreading your thighs to find a steady growing wet spot on your panties. His fingertips immediately reach to tease along your waiting slit watching as you squirm and moan.

“My needy girl. Probably been forever since he’s touched you like this huh? Made you feel good..”

The back of your head softly thuds against the wall as you lean back on your elbows. Letting yourself get lost in his touches and how his thumb circles your little button through your thoroughly soaked underwear.

“Do you know how long I’ve waited for this? Know how much I’ve missed you and those little noises you make when you take anything I give you,” he huskily states nipping your earlobe. “My fingers. My tongue. Fuck, and when you take my cock..?”

“Curtis,” you gasp nearly ready to guide his fingers inside you yourself to get that relief you now crave. As always, he knows what you need bringing your delicates swiftly down your legs to circle his middle finger around your dripping hole before plunging deep. The extended moan from your lips directly hitting his cock and making his pants feel tighter.

His ring finger soon joins as they steadily pump in and out. Not having been intimate with your own husband for a while now, you feel pathetic already being so close. Curtis can feel it too, as you clutch and squeeze.

“Should be ashamed of himself not taking care of you like you need. You deserve to be filled all day, every day. Filled to the point you can barely walk without feeling me drip down your legs. That what you want? To be filled with me?”

Your hips buck and grind on their own nearly riding his hand as your skin heats and sweat pricks your forehead. “Y-Yes! Yes Curtis please!,” you moan. His words hitting some deep seated, feral part you didn’t recognize but welcomed while palming your breast.

His mouth catches your scream when he adds a third finger. The room filling with your little “ah ah’s”, squelches, and the knock of the desk against the wall how you bucked to keep up with his fingers.

“Shit, might not ever leave the house. Just keep you by my side always wet and ready. Take you in every room and have you screaming for me.” He palms at the front of his slacks picturing your nude body bent over the counter. Or spread on the table for him and him only. “Or let you ride me and take what you want. Like that night after dinner.”

The way your toes curl and back arches he knows you’re seconds away now. Just needing that extra push to have you a twitching, trembling mess.

“Curtis I-I…please Curtis…Curtis!” Twisting his wrist just slightly to the right, he easily finds your spot as he firmly rubs his palm against you swollen nub making you gush down his hand and onto the hardwood below - a splash or two even finds the top of his shoe. It’s almost like a steady stream as it keeps flowing with every push of his fingers and Curtis can’t help but curse before finding your mouth again.

When you whimper and try to back away he knows it’s too much, slowly halting his movements before removing his hand. Automatically, you’re reaching out for him - needing some grounding force after what felt like your body floating to space - and he gladly lets you wrap your arms around his middle. Your face diving to his chest trying to hide your overwhelmed tears while he rubs your back with his clean hand.

“Did so good for me sweetheart. You feel alright?” You nod, turning your head just enough to catch him suck your release from his fingers; moaning from the taste. “Still so sweet,” he mumbles to himself and you swear you feel a small trickle of release escape your hole from that alone.

Your little bubble of ecstasy is quickly popped when the door opens reminding you of the party downstairs. Curtis shields you the best he can, but your dangling legs can easily be seen.

This makes it easy for Wes to recognize you. His face turning from amused shock at finding the always stone faced Curtis Everett with a woman to anger now realizing you were the moans and screams the men whispered about downstairs.

“The fuck are you doing up here?!,” he shouts making you scramble to get off the desk. Curtis still shields you with his back as you right your dress. Not only for your modesty, but to silently warn Wes he wouldn’t dare stand down.

“W-Wes I can explain-,”

“This was your plan the whole time huh? Use me to get to someone better..”

“No, I..I just-,”

“Just what? Accidentally ended up here with him?! Accidentally let him do whatever?” Now you were gathering a bit of a crowd, only increasing your anxiety.

“Wes please..”

“Please what?! Move on from you being a whore who opens her legs to any man she can get ahead with?!”

“Hey! Watch it,” Curtis warns stepping closer to a slightly drunk Wes.

“And after everything I did for you? Gave to you?!”

“You act like I asked for those things.”

He simply shakes his head before focusing on Curtis. “You know what, good luck with that one. Just a lazy sack that only wants to lie on her back. Can barely do that either always complaining-,”

Curtis didn’t let him finish quickly gripping Wes by the back of his neck making him kneel before you and everyone peeking through the open door. He tried to wiggle free and thrash, but Curtis just tightens his grip controlling Wes as if he was an animal handler trained to do this. Like he’d done it plenty of times before.

“You say you’re the one who gave her everything? Way I see it, you wouldn’t have had everything to give without her. Without your lovely wife, I would’ve already cancelled our partnership leaving you high and dry probably on fry duty at some fast food place. So I suggest you humble yourself pretty fucking quick.”

He seemed to get the message, remaining mostly still besides his back rising and falling from his unsteady breathing. “Matter of fact, I say you thank her.”

Wes is quiet, until Curtis jabs him in the ribs causing him to howl in pain.

“She’s waiting!”

“Th-Thank you! Thank you!,” he shouts sighing in relief when Curtis lets him go.

“Cmon,” he mumbles grabbing your hand to lead you past your husband. Past the vast crowd of people who dared not get in his way.

“W-Where are we going?,” you ask trying to keep up with his longer strides.

“Home.”

“But..but I-,”

Swiftly, he turns catching you against his chest with fingers gently gripping your chin so you’d be sure to hear him. “Home can be my place or yours and he gets put on the street, you choose. Either way from this point on, I’m not letting you stay away from me.” How could you argue with that? Especially now when he was using that commanding tone paired with that intense gaze making your core spasm. “Which one?”

“…Yours.”

He simply kisses your forehead leading you outside to retrieve his car from valet.

As for Wes, he was in for a rude awakening Monday morning when he’d be served an eviction notice saying his office space now belonged to Everett Co., minutes before he was served divorce papers already signed by you and your wedding ring.

-

Not gonna lie, I’m a little iffy about the ending but still I hope everyone enjoys! Also check out the other stories from this challenge as well💕!