#god of barfights

[nothing-impt]

Dionysus doodle :D

edit: I'm trying out a new colouring method plus I havent drawn properly in a while, so apologies if he looks odd

[astromechs]

the fandom stereotype is so often

cassian: jyn no

jyn: jyn yes

when the reality is there are about two braincells between them and about half the time neither is holding any of them

[steventhusiast]

STWG prompt 11/2/24

prompt: date night

pairing/character(s): steddie, hellfire club

it's valentine's week!! hopefully i can do all the prompts this week :)

"And with that, the barkeep..."

Eddie pauses in his storytelling to glance away from the notes hidden by his DM screen and over to the clock. His eyes widen at the time. Is it really 7:53pm already? Shit.

"With that, this session is over. You'll find out what happens with the angry barkeep next week!"

Everyone in the room groans at that, a chorus of 'seriously's and 'what the hell, Eddie's starting up even as he hurries to put his notes back into his DnD folder, and dumps all his dice into his bag haphazardly.

No one seems to notice for a moment, too busy complaining about the cliffhanger, when Gareth suddenly pauses and examines Eddie with a curious look on his face.

"Hold on, you promised we'd finally find out more about the temple this session? Where was that?"

Eddie huffs in response, and doesn't even look up as he starts folding his DM screen.

"Yeah, that was before you guys decided to talk to every single person at the tavern for an hour and start a barfight."

"That's never stopped you from getting us to where you want us before!"

"Yeah!" "Exactly!" "Please, Eddie. What happens with the barkeep."

Eddie waves a hand at everyone, and looks up to see the younger kids complaining quietly to each other, and his closer friends still seeming to inspect him carefully. He supposes they're valid in that; he's not one to back down from his plans, and has never cut off a session like this before.

But. Today is special. Today he has...

"Oh my god, you have a date." Jeff suddenly says, his eyes a little wider than usual as he grabs at Freak's arm.

"What?! Who the fuck would he have a date with?" Freak scoffs.

Eddie ignores the blush fighting to appear on his cheeks and starts collecting all of his figurines scattered around the table.

"Eddie has a date?" Mike suddenly joins in from across the room.

And, great, now the baby sheep are involved too.

"It is none of you guys's business what plans I have after this session. But, really, I gotta go." Eddie tries, but now Dustin's attention is on him as well.

"That's so funny! Steve has a date tonight too- that's why we had to ask Nancy to pick us up tonight." He says with a laugh.

Eddie laughs along with him, a little strained now because Gareth, Jeff and Freak are now squinting at him.

"Yes.. What a coincidence." Gareth says slowly as Eddie continues to pointedly avoid eye contact.

"Anyway! Got a lot to, uh. Do. Running a bit behind schedule actually, so if you could.." Eddie says as he finally finishes shoving everything back into his backpack and throws it over his shoulder, gesturing toward the drama room's door.

The younger kids leave without much complaint, but Gareth, Jeff and Freak hang back and walk slowly alongside Eddie.

"So... Steve Harrington?" Jeff asks once the kids are out of earshot, his tone a little disbelieving.

"Don't say it like it's a bad thing!" Freak slaps him on the shoulder disapprovingly as he speaks.

"It's not a bad thing! Just.. unexpected!"

"I have no idea what you're talking about." Eddie tries.

"Sure, sure. Enjoy your totally not a date night that's totally not with Steve 'the hair' Harrington." As Gareth says that, they've finally reached the doors and Eddie can well and truly escape.

He's going to have to break a few road laws if he wants to get to Steve's on time. It's only their third date, so sue him if he wants to try to make a good impression.

Even if Steve's been his friend for a few months now, and already knows about his horrible time-keeping skills.... It's still worth a try. Anything to woo Steve Harrington.

-

part two

[zvdvdlvr]

Ummm hiiiiii we need to talk more about the concept of "who did this to you" genre hotch because 1 you're so correct and 2 that's one of my favourite tropes

Also hello! 🤭

Hihihi :))

I’m literally a slut for ‘who did this to you?’ and the one bed trope so I have some things to say 😮‍💨😝😏

Probably not the most savory of ideas, but imagine Aaron accidentally walking in on y/n changing a shirt, seeing scars on her back that were trailing over to her stomach. Aaron knows that y/n hadn’t been kidnapped or tortured by any unsubs, so...?

You faced the window of the hotel, looking down on the civilians below. You had already changed your pants, but you wanted to let yourself cool down because of course you had to go Texas right after bring tackled by an unsub (your ribs and back are still sore).

“Agent l/n, are you re-“ Hotch asks, practically busting the door open without even knocking.

You fumble for your shirt and shove your arms through their respected positions, turn around, and pray your boss didn’t see what you think he saw.

“L/n,” Hotch started, voice lethally quiet as he walked slowly over to you. “Turn around. That’s an order.”

You sighed. “I don’t see how this is necessary.”

“I do. Compramization of my agent’s well being? Harrassing a federal agent? Physically assulting a federal agent?” He ranted, voice sharp.

You bit your lip, looking from Hotch’s eyes to the floor. That’s when his expressiom softened.

“Please, y/n,” he pleaded with that smooth voice of his.

“I- he was an ex of mine, Hotch. There’s nothing more to know,” you shrugged, clipping your badge to your belt and clearly signaling that you were done with the conversation.

“Let me see. I just…”

“You just…?” You prompted.

In all honesty, Aaron wanted to see the scars because he wants to know what you had to go through when he wasn’t there. Aaron wanted to see the scar tissue, run his fingertips over it, and truly realize how strong you are for going through that and still being one of the mentally and physically toughest people Aaron knew. “Please, y/n.”

Heaving a massive sigh, y/n turned around and let Aaron pull the hem of the shirt up. Yes, y/n scarred easily (Aaron learned that after y/n got burnt by an oven at Rossi’s), but seeing the marred skin felt like a knife into Aaron’s gut. He drifted his pointer finger of the skin, watching y/n shudder slightly at the touch.

“Who did this to you?” Aaron asked again, his voice softer now. “Please tell me.”

So you told him. Every detail. Everything that happened.

— 🧠

GOD BLESS IT id do anything to be one of hotch’s coworkers who got into a barfight, bleeding and bruised, and show up at his house because ‘he would know what to do’

my brain is braining, but hands are writing the way i want

[yanderes-galore]

Micah with a sheriff darling hcs

Thank you other anons for feeding me this idea to request

-🧨

He's going to be so sleazy. Compared to the other Micah requests, this is tame.

Yandere! Micah Bell with Sheriff! Darling

Pairing: Romantic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Stalking, Violence, Murder, Blood, Manipulation, Jealousy, Mature themes, Micah being down bad I guess, Harassment, Kidnapping, Forced "relationship".

Micah, unfortunately, is a man you see around often.

Due to Micah's infamy and your profession... He's definitely around.

Micah's often thrown in jail due to gunfights, bar fights, both....

You want nothing more than to have him hanged.

Micah, on the other hand, has taken a liking to you.

Imagine if you knew of him from his previous gangs?

The man is always broken out of jail and overall problematic to deal with.

You can't tell if you'd be better off hanging him, or just hoping he never comes back to your jail.

But he somehow manages to always come back to your jail.

At first it's due to a gun or barfight, that's when you first meet him.

He's always making some distasteful comment to you.

Yet as the days go on and he sits in his cell... Micah can't stop staring.

You come by to feed him or sit at your desk, going through wanted posters and speaking to bounty hunters.

The entire time Micah won't keep his eyes off you.

Occasionally you speak to him, only because he's there.

You'd much rather be speaking to your deputy, but he's not always around due to patrols.

You may even learn quite quickly that it's best to not give him a cellmate.

One day you came to check on him, only to see him trying to strangle his cellmate.

After that, trust me he lands himself in jail multiple times, you learned to keep him solo.

You have no idea why he did such a thing other than him being a violent outlaw.

Perhaps the guy belonged to some rival gang... which was part of it.

Although the other part of it was Micah heard comments being made about you... and Micah wants your attention only on him.

When Micah's first either bust out or released, you pray you never see him again.

Only for him to show up again later for some other crime.

Micah does a variety of crimes to regain your attention and be beside you in a cell.

Robbery, fights, murder...

By the time the law drags him in, you wish you could kill him yourself.

Micah purposefully does his crimes near your town.

When he's hogtied, he's grinning.

You glare at him, seeing how he's covered in blood and mud each time, only to hear him laugh.

"Hey there, Sweetheart... Miss me?"

You do not.

You often have to tell Micah to be quiet in his cell, he never is.

No, instead the outlaw presses himself against the cell, giving you sultry looks.

You grimace and jump back when he tries to grab you through the bars, desperate to feel some sort of warmth from you.

What's even worse is when he talks, all crude flirtation as he looks you up and down.

You thought he did all this in an attempt to seduce you into letting him go.

But no! Why would he even need that when he's busted out so often?

No, he presents himself to you like a harlot just because he wants to.

Your deputy has come into the jail so often to see you being harassed by Micah, leading to your deputy smacking Micah's cell

God the outlaw hates your deputy.

Micah just makes your job harder, for no one's benefit but himself.

You swear he's trying to make you uncomfortable when he presses against the bars, reaching out to grab you and hold you against them.

"A shame we keep meeting like this, behind cold bars... wouldn't you rather there be no... restrictions?"

It takes every ounce of restraint you have to not press your revolver to his forehead.

You hate nothing more than him... and he loves that.

It gets to the point when he's not in jail, he follows you.

He follows you on patrols, riding his horse a distance away until some passerby comes by on their own horse...

Then he shoots them, just to get your attention.

Aw, too bad, are you gonna hogtie him?

He'll promise to be good.

Only when you do it though, your deputy can go to hell.

Other times he just corners you to have you look at him.

He doesn't care if you attempt to kill him or take him in... He just enjoys your hands on him.

Micah seems like he'd purposely pick fights to have your attention.

Isn't he your favorite outlaw?

In a way you can consider this him being in "love" with you.

That or maybe this is just some game to him and he loves to toy with the hot sheriff in town.

"Come on, Sweetheart. I'm right here for you! Gonna kill me? You know you can't... So why don't you and I get a drink? Then maybe I can go back to that office of yours for... other reasons... yeah?"

Micah is a persistent man... unfortunately.

He is a man who is known for shooting up towns to get what he wants.

He's insane, erratic, violent... and he wants you.

He'll probably not stop until he's killed.

Something he isn't keen on letting happen.

For now, his obsession is kept under control in his cell, eying you up and down like a caged animal.

But soon, perhaps in a patrol with your deputy, Micah will come back.

He's always watching you when not in jail.

If his past says anything...

He thinks it's euphoric when he takes one of his prized revolvers...

and shoots your deputy off his horse.

Your horse immediately rears and bucks you off while your deputy's horse takes off with it, tossing you on the ground.

As you try to clear your head, noticing blood pool from your deputy, Micah steps over him and towers over you.

He's been no doubt waiting for months to do this.

"Seems you've got yourself in a little predicament, sheriff..."

Micah's voice is a mocking coo, blowing the steam off his revolver while he leans down.

You go to stand but he roughly shoves his boot on your chest, holstering his revolver before pulling out a lasso.

You go to pll out your own gun, but he kicks it out of your hand before tying your wrists.

"Been wondering when I'd get to do this... look how the tables turned."

Micah chuckles, kicking your side to roll you over as he hogties you.

You're forced to look at your dead deputy, your horses long gone.

"God... ain't you cute... and all mine...."

You grimace, squirming when Micah picks you up to place you on his horse.

"See how it feels? To be captured and carried off? I can't wait to take you back to camp... Everyone back in town's going to think you're dead."

"You'll hang for this!" You growl, only for Micah to chuckle.

"I haven't been hanged yet, bold of you to assume I will now...." Micah grins, tossing you on his horse.

Micah expects to get an earful from Dutch back at camp.

But he's sure he can convince him you're an asset.

In reality, he could care less.

He's tired of you teasing him in jail for months... Now he can have you all to himself...

No bars to keep him from what he wants.

[swifty-fox]

hmm ok can we have brat bucky thoughts then

gotta have the cake and eat it too huh.

Brat Bucky oh my fucking god. He's broken doms before, they've literally lost their temper and ended scenes because this kid just runs his mouth.

He'll talk through a choking, through a blowjob, through a gag. John Egan will YAP. With that fucking grin and a glint in his eyes he's not gunna bend for you unless you make him.

and listen. we all know Bucky likes to be hit. he fuckin begs for it. And fuck nobody hits better than Gale Cleven. Holds his chin so gently as Bucky keeps talking. Braces him just nice and tells him he's got one last chance. Doesn't yell or shove him around, doesn't threaten. He tells him what will happen if Bucky doesn't behave and when bucky doesn't he follows through.

Hits him a good one across the cheek, no way to dispel the force of the blow by turning his head because Gale has his chin in hand. he just takes it. takes it so good and asks for more.

Bucky gets bratty over not getting enough attention from Gale. When he's reading a new science text or watching a show or just not Giving Bucky Attention. When Gale bc he's such a pretty boy gets hit on by men and women alike. When Gale pulls John away from a barfight and oh how john complains and Gale tells him to behave himself.

"or what."

gale doesn't answer, doesn't have to but he will be filing it away for later

Uses a nice metal clip to attach a weighted ball to John's tongue, likes the way it makes him wince, the way his saliva drips overand off the polished chrome. Nice blessed silence until John starts whining.

Opts for choking him instead. With a hand around his neck, his fingers down his throat. (Don't tell anyone but Gale loves the way john runs his mouth. Loves how he makes him fight for every ounce of submission. Gale doesn't like team sports but he does love to win.)

And when john still wants to yap? Still wants to flirt and goad gale on he'll tie that boy up and give him ruined orgasm after ruined orgasm until he's flushed red to his neck and cringing away from Buck's hand and begging him to stop.

he'll keep going. John's still talking after all.

[mother-of-pumbkins]

Papa Ziggy, what are your twin PCs’ opinions on the other LIs like Robin and Sydney?:0 (It could be either corrupted or pure Sydney, whichever one you prefer/usually go for)

Capri:

Robin- Protective big sis energy, out of the two twins she's the one who gets the Robin's Protector trait... Tried to sort of guide him to toughen up a bit but the 'tough love' approach didn't work very well with him so now she just... kinda beats up anyone who messes with him

Sydney- Her tutor!... Sort of? She ropes him into helping her with her studies.. Usually using some line about how 'don't god say you're supposed to help the needy?' To which he usually just.. sighs and relents, though they do get along in general sort of... she kinda wants to corrupt him or at least get him to loosen up a little

Alex- Has only met a few times through someone else... you'll have to wait and see uvu

Eden- Encountered him once, one of the few times she's been legit terrified, just barely got away

Avery- Can't stand him... Its on sight.. Is considering taking the phrase 'eat the rich' literally in his case

Great Hawk- Knows of him through... someone else... But spoilers :)

Darryl- Probably one of her favorite people to work for, has and will continue to get into barfights for him

Harper- Creeps her the hell out, has never once gone to one of her therapy sessions

Remy- If she had a gun with two bullets and was stuck in a room with Avery and Remy she's shoot Remy twice

Emme:

Robin- Babies him way too much... Sees him more as a little kid than someone her own age... Tries to boost his confidence here and there but probably isn't really helping with all the coddling

Sydney- It's... complicated... She hates that Capri spends so much time with him with the whole school thing... But he's just always so damn nice... which just makes her even more aggravated cause it makes her feel guilty about disliking him

Alex- Has never met him

Eden- Capri never lets her go into the forest alone after what happened to her, so has never encountered

Avery- Her one encounter was him confusing her for Carpi while at high rage, so she's terrified of him, runs and hides whenever she sees his car

Great Hawk- Spoilers

Harper- Doesn't know why Capri doesn't like him.. he's always so nice during their sessions... not sure why her head suddenly feels so funny :)

Remy- Spoilers :)))))))))))))))))))))))

[nitw]

WAIT OH MY GOD you can even see the 8 inscriptions on the sickle in the barfight!!!!!! love the attention to detail in this movieeee

[rocksanddeadflowers]

Was listening to Inkpot Gods and thinking about DTTM again...... Do we think TS considers Aurora one of it's friends and stays until her end, which is far behind the end of the mechs, or do we consider Aurora well and truly dead by the time the mechs start dying, only her husk remaining as her inhabitants are consumed one by one by the cosmos?

Because I feel like Aurora watched her crew slowly picked off by the universe after so many millennia together, aching with grief and weighed with the guilt for feeling relief that they won't be stuck here forever.

Jonny dies last, laughing in that backwater barfight, truly first mate now, not captain, because he couldn't even go down with the ship, the idea alone stealing more bitter laughter from his lungs.

All that is left is the Toy Soldier, somehow still looking exactly the same as when Jonny met it on that moon, yet so vastly changed over the years, and the Aurora, who has indeed changed, outside and in, but is still Aurora. The Toy Soldier wanders her empty halls, often silent now aside from the gentle hum of Aurora herself. Toy fills the silence with upbeat songs, or grieving ballads, that echo down the way. However the Aurora ends, she shall end one day, and the Toy Soldier won't be far to follow it's last friend into another world full of more adventures to quest and more games to play. Perhaps the others will be there again to, it will just have to pretend to hope.

[ssavinggrace]

incorrect quotes but it's only Thalia

Shapeshifter: *transforms to look like thalia* thalia: Okay, are you like BLIND? You look nothing like me. First off, I'm way taller. Secondly, I DO NOT look so sleep deprived and lastly, if you could drag comb through that hair you're like a 7 on a good day and I've been told I'm a constant 10.

thalia: My expectations were low but holy fuck.

thalia:no problemo!

thalia, internally: But it was all problemo.

thalia: Social distancing says you shouldn't be within an elbow's distance of each other. *later, in a barfight*

thalia: Social distancing doesn't say nothing about feet! *kicks opponent in the face*

thalia: Dracula had it right, sleep all day, live alone in a castle, and explode into bats to get out of all social situations.

thalia: *gets set on fire and screams in agony* thalia: Nah, I’m just kidding. Fire does nothing to me.

thalia: My heart is guarded but like… very poorly. The kind of guards that would let 3 kids in a trench coat into an R rated movie.

thalia: I have passed the transitional stage of internet geekhood. thalia: I was cashiering at work today, and was punching in the code for plums, which is 4040, and the 0 key doesn't work this well, so I punched it in wrong. And the machine flashed up "Item Not Found: 404". thalia: And I actually laughed out loud.

thalia: I’m a bad person, I’m a very bad person, I’m a horrible person.

the seven:

thalia: No you’re not, thalia! We still love you, thalia!

thalia: Well, well, well, if it isn’t the consequences of my actions.

thalia: All of your existences are confusing. .The Seven: How so? .thalia: Your presence is annoying, but the thought of anything bad happening to any of you upsets me.

thalia: Well, if you're not at least a little bit gay for your friends, then what kind of friend are you?

thalia: Yeah I'm LGBT. cuLt leader. Gods hate me personally. cowBoy hat. *sniffles* Trying my best.

thalia, working at McDonald's: Sorry sir, we don't serve a McFuck here, so either you throw that one slice of pickle out or we're gonna have a McProblem.

thalia: *spits mouthful of blood onto floor* You’ve become far more powerful since we last crossed paths. Dentist: Please stop, there’s literally a sink right next to you.

thalia: But when all hope seemed lost, I had an epiphany! thalia, earlier: I'm going to throw myself into the sea.

thalia: get in loser! we're committing vehicular manslaughter!!

thalia: I have one foot in the grave but in a kind of fun flirty way, the way one might slip on a fishnet stocking.

thalia: I’m gonna mix a can of Red Bull with seventeen shots of espresso in a fishbowl and then chug it while Kids by MGMT plays in the background so I can perceive twenty-three spatial dimensions and fight my own soul.

[boxwinebaddie]

Has Raven/Jersey ever broken a bone?

alright, *cracks knuckles*

this one goes out to sickfic princess ana and whumpwhiz rp.

*blows a kiss to the heavens bc they're angels* MWAH!

but aaaaany-knee-ways:

...it's interesting, actually.

( or at least, it is to me, darling. )

because of how he's written, you'd think probably think, 'oh, but nina! jerseykyle gets in all these fights. he's all big and tough and strong! he prolly breaks bones all the time!" and that's precisely IT, my dear!

jersey breaks bones;

he does not get his bones broken.

EVER.

and i suppose that's because he is a seasoned fighter. ergo, he knows how to throw a wicked punch, where exactly on your body it will hurt or humiliate you the most -- probably a combination of the two if he's feeling particularly pissed that day ( everyday ) -- how many times to do it, where you're vulnerable, sees everyone as a possible adversary and thus, weaponizes the moment he sees you, surveys you, sizes you up, indicates what kind of threat you are and…

Promptly Neutralizes You.

he takes all these precautions, runs all these tedious, elaborate tests and intense, premeditated processes of elimination ( literally ), not just because he does not like losing, which he doesn't...but because he literally can't. simply put: he does not know how to lose or get hit.

see, jersey does not cope with pain very well. mentally or physically. that's why he inflicts pain, because he is secretly scared of feeling it.

on the outside, he is a harsh, frightening, impenetrable, menacing thing covered in barbs and wires and armed heavily, because on the inside he is extremely fragile and should even the smallest chink in his armor form, his entire fierce façade will shatter into smithereens.

he does not like to get hurt, to feel weak, to feel unpleasant and horrible things, so he does everything in his power to be powerful so that he will never feel powerless. it's why he learned how to fight, it wasn't to hit people, it was to avoid being hit by other people. it was a defense mechanism because of how often he got bullied and how weak he constantly was from swimming out against the current of all his chronic illnesses. a lot of people would just let go of that short stick that life gave them and drown, but not kyle. not my baby. no, his life belongs to him. so he sharpened that stick into the shiv...

stuck it straight through the gut of life,

— and made god beg for HIS mercy.

but yes, it's all a perfectly placed show. because my boy, scary and frightening as he may be swinging those freckled fists of fury...

is a fucking WUSS.

who has not broken a lot of bones actually! not his anyways! because when he does lose a fight, he is a sore fucking loser indeed because he's suddenly hit with all this pain that he does not know how to endure or deal with and literally is such a baby and a princess, omg.

i /swear/ that WHOLE divorce whumpshot para and the one of him barfighting is him acting really tough and cool, but hes really like hooly shit, this sucks so fkn Bad, i hate this, i want my mOM!! :'(

riiiiiiiiiip, lmaooooo.

spoiler alert: jersey kyle is dainty and spoiled. he is a champion complainer and if gets a papercut...

you will hear about it.

trust.

conversely, however...lead singer ravenstan,

is very Quiet about pain.

ravenstan knows pain like the back of his hands, he, unfortunately, has had hands on him his entire life and where kyle learned to kick and claw and bite, stan just...internalized and endured all that pain.

he isn't brutal or vicious, he is kind and forgiving, he does not hurt things even if they are hurting him and has been hurt so much that being hurt is as easy as breathing to him…which is horrible because he has asthma and a lot of smoke-related respiratory damage.

but yeah, i actually ( god, i love you ravenstan ) want to scream because where jersey is hard outside and soft inside, raven is soft outside and hard inside and is extremely good at being hurt, ( a child weaned on pain thinks hurt is a comfort, rip ), will take pretty much anything you throw at him and because he literally does not want to inconvenience you...will not even indicate that he's hurt to you.

like he is very passionate about protecting and taking care of other people, but he does not care at all about himself or what happens to him, so if you're hurt, he is on his hands and knees, comforting you, placating you, doing whatever he can to help you...and he might have three bullets in his back, you wouldn't know until he started bleeding through his clothes and fell over. that man is a fucking TANK, guys.

the universe has tried to kill ravenstan...several tries.

( suicide tw, he has also tried a couple times </3 )

no such luck.

it helps that he actually has a surprising amount of off-hand medical knowledge because sharon transferred a lot of it onto him during stan's childhood when she was patching him up because he was a fkn disaster child who tracked mud and blood into her house 25/8, spent three days in a tree and took a hockey puck to the face.

i genuinely think that a large part of why stan was able to survive and endure a lot of the horrors he had was because sharon scolding him in spanish and teaching him stuff literally saved his fucking life.

but yeah, ravenstan is my selfless, accident prone king. he is such a mess, pilots his body so carelessly that it is legitimately frightening. he is constantly covered in bruises he doesn't remember getting, scratches he didn't even notice, does dumb shit and gets hurt and like literally can’t tell he's hurt until he is like abt to pass out.

tldr: rave gets hurt often and has broken a lot of bones.

usually because he's doing stupid, heroic shit.

for example, i am not sure how it got broken, i like to think it was at a concert or an event and he SAVED SOMEONE from something falling or what have you and broke the fuck out of his arm. so his arm was in a cast ( i need it to be hot pink ) and he was super bummed out and felt hella bad because he had a meet and greet and couldn't sign autographs so he just let everyone else...

give him Their autograph instead.

so no one got a personally signed picture of raven of crimson dawn, but much cooler, imo, was that they all personally signed his cast.

my eyes are leaking, lmao. branch in my eyeeee. ;-;

gods...sweet...sweet angel. uGh.

THIS IS SO LONG, BUT I HOPE THIS ANSWERS YOUR QUESTION! idk why i got so invested in this, omg, but thank you for asking and being curious and thank you all for being so lovely and asking me things. it means a lot to me that you care and know i adore you.

-uncle nina, jerseykyle inflictor of angst pain

( and major wuss ) >.>

[nothing-impt]

Ody's not gonna be happy to see his son turn into an alcoholic lol (More Substitute Mentor art :D)

[hauntedwizardmoment]

jace and porter and the please please please video of ms carpenter famr

YEAHHHHH oh my god WAIT yes jace and porter meet cute in the fucking elmville jail. jace got arrested for public intoxication. porter's in there for starting a barfight at the black pit or smth. and they hit it off and end up as like a bonnie and clyde type duo. oh this is so FUN i could sooooo see this happening.

[sillypenguincats]

Helluva Boss incorrect quotes

Warning; mentions of knives, dirty jokes

Stolas: Bonjour, Andrealphus. Voulez–vous coucher avec moi?

Andrealphus: No, I don't want to sleep with you.

Stolas: Is that what that means? Oh, man, I had a really gross tennis instructor.

Mrs. Mayberry: Are you mad?

Moxxie: No.

Mrs. Mayberry: So sharpening your knives at 3 in the morning is just a hobby?

Robo Fizz: Will Ozzie be okay?

Mammon: They won’t be when I find them.

Stolas: Care to give a free sample to a pretty person?

Paimon, manning a bake sale and tired of their shit: Sure! You know one?

Stolas:

Stolas: Care to give a free sample to an ugly person?

Verosika: Hey, quick question. How petty am I allowed to be?

Chaz: Seriously, all you do is bitch.

Moxxie: I happen to bitch the perfect amount for someone in my situation.

Verosika: Are you trying to seduce me?

Chaz: Why, are you seducible?

Blitzø: How is spring not everyone’s favorite season? The trees are PINK, guys!

Moxxie: Allergies are also a problem, y'know.

Blitzø: But pink.

Stolas: And it's hot.

Blitzø: PINK!

Octavia: My level of gay has reached “sighing deeply whenever anything extremely heterosexual happens near me”.

Barbie, singing: I don’t want a lot for Christmas, there is just one thing I need—

Blitzø: A family.

Cash: A better love life.

Millie: Mental stability.

Mrs. Mayberry: *clueless* Bagels?

Barbie: What are you drinking?

Fizzarolli: Vodka.

Barbie: Straight?

Fizzarolli: No, gay. Why?

Crimson: Did you miss me while I was gone?

Millie: You were gone?

Striker: Hello, my name is Failure, and you're watching my life crumble into pieces.

Striker: *waves their finger and sings like they're in a Disney Channel intro*

Andrealphus: I’m afraid of clowns. There, I said it.

Stolas: Andrealphus, if you don't like clowns, why are you hanging with Striker?

Mammon: My assistance will be an act of beneviolence.

Stolas: ...Don’t you mean benevolence?

Mammon: No.

Striker: Social distancing says you shouldn't be within an elbow's distance of each other.

*later, in a barfight*

Striker: Social distancing doesn't say nothing about feet! *kicks opponent in the face*

Mammon: If God’s ever been mad at anything I’ve ever said, he hasn’t done shit about it.

Mammon: So he either doesn’t care or he’s a coward.

Chaz: Okay, if we can't do it by sheer force, we'll do it my way.

Blitzø: But your way is sheer force!

Mammon: Money... Is like president trading cards.

Lin: Who the fuck-

Joe: Language!

Lin: Whom the fuck-

Joe: No.

Fizzarolli: Welcome to Fucking Applebees, do you want apples or bees?

Bee: Bees?

Fizzarolli: THEY HAVE SELECTED THE BEES!

Bee: Wait-

*Asmodeus approaches, shaking a jar of bees menacingly*

Striker: When I see initials carved into a tree with a heart I think it’s so romantic. Two lovers on a date... one of them carrying a knife for some reason.

[jprgirl]

Best TAJ Episode: Poll 1

Use whatever metric you like! Personal preference, technical aspects, whatever! Feel free to make your case in the notes, and reblog to help spread the polls! :)

Possibly spoilery episode descriptions and screenshots below the cut to help you decide!

S2.E1 - And Then She Will Come to You

Several months have passed [since the end of S1]. Mike is living with Axl and Zeb (who now identifies as the wolf Freki). Mike is using his powers to have frequent one-night stands as he tries to deal with the end of his marriage. Ty and Eva's relationship is darkly passionate and possibly self-destructive. Dawn is back working for Anders, and is stalking Ty. Agnetha sends Anders off to Norway on a mysterious errand. She informs Axl, Mike and Ty that she is their mother; Axl and Mike are not thrilled. Axl is frustrated that his brothers are ignoring the quest for Frigg. An old acquaintance of Olaf's, the reincarnation of Kvasir, tells Axl that he must become a man before he can be a god, and that Frigg will then come to him. Anders is seen in a hotel room, looking bemusedly at a drawing of Yggdrasil.

-

S1.E2 - This is Where Duty Starts

Anders starts researching for women born of Scandinavian descent in order to find the reincarnated goddess Frigg, his brother Axl's destined wife. Meanwhile, Mikkel fears that he and his wife Valerie's continued inability to conceive through IVF maybe because she is mortal and he is a god. We learn that at 21, when he inherited his powers, he arrogantly started a barfight which resulted in his best friend Rob, who at the time was Valerie's lover, being left in a coma due to a blow to the head. Hence, he decided to live life without using his god powers, but now Rob, after 15 years, has started babbling in Norse in his sleep. Anders convinces Axl to become romantic with one of his Frigg candidates, a professional athlete and party girl named Karla, even though Axl doesn't want his first time to be with a stranger. Axl loses his virginity, but has a scare when Karla passes out, and Ty must revive her. Worse yet, Jaime, a girl that Axl really likes, sees him out on a date with Karla and later rejects him.

Episode descriptions taken from Wikipedia

[boydykedevo]

Year 0

The fight’s over not long after Magnus steps in. It’s all a bit of a blur, but he’s already planning on taking credit for putting a stop to it anyway. He landed a few good punches, took a few more good hits than that, and then everything was over one way or another. Magnus leans against the wall and slides to the floor, blood still rushing in his ears.

“Yo, Burnsides, what the fuck was that?” someone calls from somewhere to his right. Magnus knows that voice, it’s pretty damn distinctive, but his head is still spinning from that last punch, and he can’t quite put a name to it. He blinks slowly, cradling his eye with one hand, and looks towards the sound.

The twins are both watching him from the pool table. Right. That’s who the voice belongs to. He’s not sure which of them said it, not that it matters, because they’re both on their way over here. He closes his eyes and groans. The adrenaline high is wearing off just a bit.

They kneel beside him. One of them touches beneath the eye he’s cradling, and he hisses, flinching away. “Yeesh,” the other one says, and oh yeah, that’s definitely Lup. “Do you think you’re concussed?”

Magnus shrugs, thinks about it for a bit, then shakes his head. “Naw, naw, I know what a concussion feels like.”

Taako snorts. “Course you do.” He starts to tug at Magnus’s hand, but he just pulls away again. “Lemme see, dumbass, I’m tryna help. Jesus, what’d you do that for anyway?”

“Iunno. Bored.” He reluctantly pulls his hand away, peeking at Taako with the other one. He’s not concussed, but he must have some kinda head injury, cuz Taako looks like he’s fucking glowing; he has to take a second to right his train of thought. “Didja see me get that jerk?” 

Taako rolls his eyes. Lup snickers, “Sure, Mags.”

“I was too distracted watching you get punched in the face,” Taako says. “So hard seeing someone else live your dream.”

Magnus pouts, which just makes them both laugh again. Taako grabs him by the chin and angles his face around. Magnus’s breath catches. His eyes widen, watching Taako give him a dispassionate look over, and something indecipherable curls in his gut.

“Yeah, bub, this is gonna be a black eye,” Taako concludes, standing up. “That was the dumbest shit I’ve ever seen you do.”

“Not for long,” he promises. Lup grins, offering a fistbump, which he takes. 

They help him to his feet. Taako wrinkles his nose at the bit of blood on his knuckles, grabbing the bottom of Magnus’s shirt to wipe it off. Now that he’s looking at them, he can see a pair of bright blue, shiny shoes in Lup’s grip. Lup follows his gaze. “Those are theirs,” she explains, pointing a thumb at a pair of adventurers near the pool table, one of whom’s got nothing but socks on. 

Taako cracks up, dropping Magnus’s hand and leaning on her shoulders for support through his giggles. “She’s fucking good,” he gloats. “You should’ve seen her, Burnsides, she—” another fit of giggles cuts him off, and Magnus finds himself staring. He’s gorgeous, everyone knows that, but Magnus hasn’t ever really stopped to pay attention to him before now. His eyes scrunch up and his mouth falls open, displaying the gap tooth he and Lup share. His ears tilt upwards, flicking every few seconds. Magnus can’t help but laugh along.

God. He can’t be getting a crush on the dude he’s gonna be stuck sharing a room with for two months starting tomorrow, what the fuck. How fucking hard did he get punched?

“Do either of you have an ice pack?” he asks to distract himself. His eye is really starting to sting now, and he brings a hand back to it.

Lup shrugs. “Maybe think ahead before jumping into a barfight next time.” She grabs Taako’s hand and starts to pull him away. “We’re gonna get back to it, if you’re good.”

“I—” he starts. Taako looks back at him and—

Ah fuck. Jesus Christ. Fucking hell. 

“Yeah, okay,” he agrees. “Have fun.” They throw him a grin each, and then they’re gone.

His eye still hurts like hell.