#god i need to get back to studying ive done absolutely nothing on it yet MHSJEJO goddammit | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

generallybarzy · 4 years ago

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hey there, stranger. iv

one, two, three

an: as you can tell, i’ve been having a really, really rough time lately. I haven’t been posting, so I hope the length of this chapter makes up for it a little bit. Not including a summary here because you all know what this fic is by now, and if not, the other chapters are linked above! I hope you enjoy this. I have to thank @royaltyofhockeylosers, @thirteenisles, and my potato anon for always being there whether I have to talk about this fic or my personal life!! I love you all and I absolute would not have gotten through the past week or even posted this fic without you!!!! The ending scene of this chapter (you’ll see) is the first part of this fic I thought of, what I basically wrote the rest of the fic around, and honestly one of my favorite scenes ever.

word count: 3.7k

the playlist :)

Two more weeks and countless games passed before Mat was asking about another date.

You were sitting in class, daydreaming about that night- his arm heavy around your shoulders, pulling you into his side, his scent surrounding you, his hoodie swallowing you, the way his hand was big and warm in yours, the way his pretty hazel eyes softened when he looked down at you, the way your heart leapt when he leaned down, his eyes slipping shut for that first kiss… when your phone vibrated.

Handsome maty: hey babe! i don't have practice tomorrow, you wanna do something? ❤

The heart emoji made your own heart beat fast. So you were at that point of the relationship already, huh?

You'd never know, but Mat was terrified to send that text. He typed it out and deleted it multiple times, running his hands through his hair and closing his texts to call Tito and ask for advice. Was it too early for hearts? Would you be scared and run off? Would he sabotage a great thing just by showing you how much he cared? But in the end he remembered.

“I wanna date you. Like, officially. I want it to be us.”

“I want it to be us too.”

And God, he really did.

You wanted to go out with him again, you really, really did, but there was one thing preventing you from doing that. And that one thing preventing you from seeing him was the same thing that got you together in the first place: the Seidenbergs.

Rebecca had called you that morning, joyous and chatting about a mystery date she was going on and how Dennis surprised her. And while you were as overjoyed for her as always and couldn't wait to see the kids again, it sucked that even though the older man was retired from hockey now, his and Mat's schedules seemed to be clashing. Whenever Mat wanted to take you out, the Seids were going out.

You: maty, I really wish i could. But I have to babysit tonight 😥

❤maty: no problem, I can come help! The kids already know me anyway

You didn't expect him to be angry really, but you at least wanted him to be upset. You were expecting the sting of guilt when he responded with that sad, puppy-dog way of his. But what you weren't expecting was the easy compliance he gave. It took a few moments for you to process his message, you were overthinking. These weren't your kids, would Rebecca be okay with you bringing Mat as your boyfriend? Or would that be inappropriate? Then, Mat sent another message.

❤maty: or if this is your way of trying to turn me down easy or hint you don't want to hang, you can just tell me. I promise I won't be upset, babe. But I'll come help if you want?

And that did it for you.

The fact that he thought you didn’t want to hang out was hurting your heart. Maybe you didn’t kiss him the other night, but you didn’t want him to think you were uninterested. Especially when it was quite the opposite. You couldn’t stop thinking about him if you tried. As you sat through boring lectures in class about things you once paid attention to, you found yourself daydreaming. Of how his lips would feel on yours, how soft, and pink they looked. How they parted slightly as he leaned down, his warm breath fanning over your own...

You wanted to kiss him, you really did, but something held you back. Nothing had ever felt wrong with Mat before, but something just felt so strange. It felt off, and you hated it. Maybe it was the fact that it had been so long since you had a real boyfriend, maybe you were scared you wouldn’t be good at kissing after so long, maybe you were scared of this relationship getting too serious, that after that kiss, you’d be too far in and Mat would get tired of you. Maybe you were scared of heartbreak again. Whatever it was, you panicked and drew away. He took it so well, he was sweet and patient and didn’t judge you for wanting to wait. And it just made you fall even more.

God, what you would do to kiss him now.

You: trust me, i really want to see you tonight. but we need to ask rebecca and dennis first

❤maty: done ✔

Usually, all your worries about guys went out the window when you walked in the door to the Seidenberg’s household. You could forget about boyfriends, drama, work and your studies for the night and focus on the little kids that had strangely become like friends to you. But tonight, your anxiety about boys- a certain boy in particular- was spiking. You were going to be spending the evening with Mat. You couldn’t help the way your heart was pounding as you tried to compose yourself in the bathroom before the Seidenburgs left on their date. It wasn’t going to be a long night, the sun was already going down, so you’d probably just put on a movie and then take the kids to bed. You smiled at yourself in the mirror as your mind drifted back to the night of your almost-kiss and how patient and gentle and ready Mat was.

“(Y/N), someone’s here for you!” You heard Rebecca call from the front door. You quickly brushed some flyaway hairs back and took a few breaths to steady yourself.

Mat.

“Yeah, I have a feeling I already know who it is!” You called back with a smile in your voice, opening the bathroom door and making your way to the kitchen. Rebecca and Dennis were standing there, ready to leave and, both smiling like they knew something you didn’t, the door was only cracked slightly and Mat hadn’t yet come inside. Before you could even ask why he was still out in the cold, your matchmaker motioned towards the door.

“He’s waiting.”

You could barely even open the door the whole way before your lips fell open in a little surprised O. "Mat."

"Hey there, babe." There he stood on the doorstep, looking absolutely warm and cozy in all sweats and a hoodie, in those signature white shoes he'd been sporting on every date so far. The cold November wind tossed his hair around and a bright flush painted his cheeks in happiness as he held a bouquet of bright flowers out in front of him. When he saw you trying our best to contain your smile, his face split into a huge grin. And when he smiled, your heart almost leaped out of your chest. "You have no idea how hard it was to find these so late in the year."

"Oh my God, Maty."

"I hope this isn’t too cheesy, but I figured, if we're gonna be together all night, we might as well make it a date, right?"

Your heart fluttered, you wanted to pull him close, kiss him right there, but it wasn't the right time, especially not with the Seidenburgs standing right behind you in the kitchen. You reached out, grabbed his hand, and grinned. "Get in here, you big goof. You’re gonna get a cold."

The Siedenbergs were giving their goodbye kisses to the children when you stepped inside with Mat. And as they left, Rebecca winked at you and glanced back towards Mat, who was chatting with Dennis and beautifully oblivious to your cheeky silent conversation and busying himself with the kids. The second he stepped in the doorway, it seemed, the kids were all over him. "Maty!" They must have missed having him around.

It was obvious they missed having him around, as they were jumping around his legs and rambling about things they’d been up to lately the second they could get to him. And Mat listened intently and with the softest smile, and it was obvious he really loved them too.

The youngest children were talking about their day at school when you took the bouquet of flowers out of Mat’s arms, and suddenly they seemed interested. ‘

“You got flowers?"

"Yeah! Aren’t they pretty? They're from Mat." And suddenly the house burst into little "oooooh"s. Ah, children.

"You got (y/n) flowers??? Do you liiiike her?"

"I do like her." Mat’s eyes found yours and smiled, a hopeful, almost unsure smile as if he was really urging you to feel the same. You weren’t about to go on about your still young relationship in front of children, so you just smiled back.

"Are you best friends?"

"No, more than that."

“Ewww-”

“Alright,” You cut them off, just wanting to stay off the topic of feelings, romance, and relationships. This used to be the place you went to forget about those things, but you couldn’t do that with Mat here. Not that you were upset, you loved having him here, but there was something about talking about your relationship that still made you a little uneasy. And you hated feeling uneasy about him. "Do we have any homework to finish tonight?”

Something twisted in your heart while you watched Mat sit at the kitchen counter and help the kids with their homework. There was something so domestic and warm about these situations that it almost made you nervous. Was it way too early in the relationship to be imagining these things with him? It was so soon, everything was happening so fast, that it scared you. You didn’t want to love again, you didn’t want to hurt again, but everything about Mat made you want to risk it all.

That feeling struck you again as you stood in the kitchen, washing their dishes and watching Mat reading at the table with their little boy as the girls colored. Mat was helping him along softly here and there and giving him a little high five at the end of each page, and even though you absolutely did not want children any time soon- you could barely afford to get by yourself- there's just something about a man that's good with kids. And Mat was great with them, probably because he acted like a kid himself and already knew them well.

"Can we have ice cream?" Mat glanced up at you in amusement to gauge your reaction to the bold statement of the youngest girl.

"Ah, I don't know how your parents would feel about that."

“Pleeeeease!”

“Ice cream, ice cream, please!”

“I think the general consensus is that we all want ice cream.” Mat grinned a stupid little shit-eating grin and the children nodded along with him. “C'mon, Y/N. Don't be a party pooper." You almost couldn’t believe that Mat was gonna betray you like this, but it seemed so like him. Taking risks, living, having fun.

"You're such a child, Mat."

He looked up for a moment with wide, worried eyes, as if really worried you were upset with him, but the smile on your face must have given it away, because he smiled back proudly. "Yeah, I am."

"Alright,” You smiled at the looks of glee around the table, from all three of the kids and even Mat. “We’ll have ice cream, but don't tell your parents." The kids cheered thanks at you and Mat, who was still grinning widely up at you from the table. You couldn’t quite read the expression on his face, but when he stood from where he was to take the ice cream out of the freezer and his arm curled around your waist for a second while the kids weren’t watching, you were so flustered you had to look away with a smile. He made you feel so tingly and warm. “So, what movie are we watching tonight?”

A few hours later, you were sitting on the couch with Mat, battling through your second run of The Little Mermaid while the kids watched and colored and got drowsy.

You and Mat had stretched out under a thick, fluffy blanket, your legs on the sectional and his propped up on the coffee table, which he insisted was okay because he "used to do it all the time". Your head was resting against his bicep, and the moment his arm curled its way around your shoulders, your breath hitched in your throat. And he must have noticed because he glanced down at you with that same gentle question as the other night when he tried to kiss you.

Too much? Too soon?

It might have been too much, you might have panicked a little, but if you were learning anything recently, it was that you needed to take a risk and stop being so scared to get hurt. So you curled further against him, bringing a leg up to bend across his lap and winding your arms around his waist. His hand fell heavily onto your knee, rubbing it and pulling you closer in under the blanket, and his lips quirked up a little at the ends. This was warm, gentle, soft, perfect. Everything around was drowned out, save for the noise of both of your beating hearts pounding against each other, and he reached up to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear with pink cheeks.

“Hey there.” His breath fanned across your lips, smelling of the sweet ice cream you’d all been snacking on earlier.

“Hi.”

Your breath hitched in your throat when his hand cupped your cheek, your heart sped up and your cheeks went hot as he furrowed his brows as if considering something.

Please just do it...

🎶"Sha-la-la-la-la-la

My, oh my

Looks like the boy's too shy

Ain't gonna kiss the girl

Sha-la-la-la-la-la

Ain't that sad

It's such a shame, too bad

You're gonna miss the girl"🎶

“(Y/NNNNN).” You snapped up at the sound of your name to see the little boy yawning and rubbing his eyes. Mat swallowed thickly, turning away and refocusing on the movie in front of him, as if he’d even been watching in the first place. “I’m sleepy.”

“Yeah?” You untangled yourself from Mat and stood from your cocoon of comfort under the blanket, despite wanting nothing more than to stay in his arms all night. “Alright, Let’s get you to bed, buddy.”

When you returned to the living room after helping the kids through their nightly routine and tucking them into bed, you found Mat turning off the TV and gathering up the coloring books and dishes to put away. You locked eyes with him, feeling absolutely flustered and wanting to cuddle him. He looked back at you, chewing on his bottom lip as if he had something to say, but he kept silent. It was quiet, but not tense, as you moved around the kitchen. Putting things away and cleaning up and smiling as you bumped into each other. He seemed to open his mouth for a moment, considering his words, but he said nothing, and you couldn't even get the chance to ask him if the two of you could crawl back under the blankets before the front door opened and in walked the Seidenbergs.

Dennis and Rebecca thanked you over and over again, quietly, as the kids were asleep. “I hope Mat behaved himself too.”

“It was like having a fourth kid to look after.”

“Hey, I wasn’t that bad.” He smiled at you across the table, a little secret in his eyes, hinting to the moment on the couch where you’d almost… almost kissed. No one had to know about that. Not yet.

The moment you offered to get an Uber and head home, Mat spoke up softly, grabbing your attention before you could leave. “Hey, my place isn’t too far from here. Let’s go on a walk. We can call you an uber from there?” He spoke almost shyly, giving you a tiny smile, his head cocked to the side and his eyes sparkling with glee, tilting his eyebrow up in question. You only nodded at him, smiling back with matched enthusiasm, and headed out the front door, hand in hand, with the Seidenburgs smiling fondly after you.

Outside, flurries had started coming down, a light dusting of snow beginning to lay in the patches of grass beside you. It was frigid, and even Mat’s hoodie and your own jacket didn’t seem to do much work to protect you. But being pressed against his warm body, your hand in his was so worth it. “Maty, it’s snowing!”

He chuckled at the childlike enthusiasm of your words. “Yeah.”

He watched you with awe as you gazed around at how the snowflakes sparkled in the streetlights. “You know,” you began, squeezing his hand and pulling him back to reality, “I love the snow. I love winter. Everything is so quiet and peaceful. As a kid, you would go to bed one night and wake up the next morning with inches of snow on the ground, without ever realizing anything happened. It happens so quietly, so serenely, so softly, without anyone realizing. It’s a surprise. I love that.”

“Yeah?”

“All the best things happen softly.” There was a moment of silence as the words settled peacefully between you, and Mat pondered your words. “No, that probably sounds dumb.”

“No, that’s beautiful. You could be a poet.” All the best things happen softly. He agreed. Like the way he was falling more and more for you every day, like falling onto a bed of down and soft pillows, like falling into a lover’s waiting arms after a long day, like the warmest embrace of tangled limbs and tickly hair in your face. Like falling in love. “Plus, being cold means cuddling. Like tonight.” He nudged your side teasingly and squeezed you against him. “I liked that.”

“I liked that too.”

“Sorry we couldn’t do something else tonight. I usually don’t make my boyfriends babysit with me so early in the relationship.”

“No problem.” He smiled and tugged you closer into his side. “I love hanging out with those kids. And there’s no place I’d rather be than with you, babe.”

Your face got hot at the pet name. You’d never get used to someone calling you that. It’d been so long. “You’ve gotta be careful calling me babe. I might just fall for you.”

“Huh.” It was barely a whisper, but you heard every word. “Maybe that’s the goal.”

You walked in silence once again, a comfortable, gentle silence, with only the sound of leaves crunching under your shoes and rustling in the breeze, until Mat came to a stop in front of a tall building.

"So, this is my place."

"Yeah?"

"So I should probably call you that Uber…"

"Probably." But Mat made no effort to pull out his phone, his hand stayed still, laced through yours.

The air between your bodies was heavy, not with tension, not with dread, but something much, much softer. Something needy and aching, something that made your cheeks heat up and your hearts beat faster, as you took in the sight of each other. Maybe it was still the idea of being in a relationship again that had you both so flustered, had you both weak in the knees. Maybe you just couldn’t believe you had someone like this. You reached up absentmindedly to tuck a stray lock of Mat’s hair behind his ear, to shake away some of the flurries, giggling softly with him as his hand bumped into yours while reaching up to do the same to you.

“Hey there.”

Mat let out a warm puff of air, a soft sigh, his eyes melting into warm, honey-like pools as he gazed down to you, “Hey.”

“It’s chilly.” You began, but your words were cut off. Cut off by the feeling of a warm palm against your cheek, tilting your head up to meet a pair of lips in a gentle touch. It wasn’t a kiss, not yet, but rather a question. A murmur of hope and a suggestion, a gentle urging to follow him, to dip your toe in and try out the waters, maybe swim with him. And as he began to back up, having asked his question and letting you free to ponder it, your hand unlaced from his and you stretched up on your tiptoes to grasp his cheek. Your hands were small and soft against his cheeks, the tips of your fingers tracing his pretty cheekbones and cupping his jawline and tugging him closer to you, sliding back to the black hair at the back of his neck. A perfect fit. Like yin and yang.

He sighed out against your mouth as you sunk into him, his own lips curling up in a smile as his hands came up to cup you against him in this gentle embrace. Cradling the back of your neck, his fingers chilly and making you shiver as they dipped under your hair.

And when you finally broke apart from what felt like an eternal embrace that had no boundaries, Mat leaned his forehead down against yours, his eyes gentle and sleepy and warm as he gazed into you, and wow, he was so beautiful. He was breathing softly against your lips, as if the kiss had knocked the air from his lungs with its power, no matter how delicate and precious, and each warm puff of air he sighed against your lips made you smile.

“I- uhh,” He laughed sheepishly, reaching his hand up to thread through his hair- a nervous habit you’d realized a while ago. “I kinda forgot to ask if I earned that kiss yet.”

It was your turn to laugh now, sinking back down to your flat feet and leaning up to press a kiss onto his chin. “You did.”

He laughed at your little peck to his chin and pulled you into an embrace, entwining your bodies together and sharing your warmth, not caring who might be able to see you. There it was, he had his kiss. It was better than he'd ever had, better than he could've ever hoped for and better than he ever imagined. And it was with you. Your fingers were combing through his hair, and it was making him sleepy, and he wanted nothing more than to have someone to sleep next to tonight, to watch the snow fall outside his bedroom window from where they lay together in the comfort of his sheets. He wanted the comfort, the coziness, the peace, the softness. And he wanted it with you.

"Well, I hate to ruin the moment," you started, turning to look up at him "But you should probably call that uber soon. Before I freeze to death out here."

"Mhm."

But Mat did nothing, he stayed where he was, gazing down at you and glancing up at his apartment, eyebrows furrowed in thought. "Hey, Mat? Whatcha thinking?" He looked down at you again as you continued to thread your fingers through his dark locks, seeming to have made up his mind about something. With a sigh and a smile, he held your hips and pulled you against him, leaned down, ghosting his lips against yours once more and making your heart pound at the sound of his whisper:

"Stay the night?"

#mat barzal #mathew barzal #mat barzal x reader #mat barzal fic #nhl fanfiction #nhl fic #op #fic

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xofanfics · 4 years ago

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String - Part VI

Genre: angst, fluff

Pairing: Baekhyun x Female Reader FT. SEHUN

Word Count: 2.8k

Summary: You find yourself in a friends-with-benefits situation with your best friend. You have no business falling for him, but your heart begs to differ.

Baekhyun hadn’t heard from you since that night. You hadn’t responded to his text and he had no idea whether you’d listened to his voicemail. And Evie and Sadie were no help either. They said that you’d approach him when you were ready but he was impatient.

Guilt pulled at Baekhyun as if someone was tugging the bottom of his shirt. Even though he had started seeing Kira like he wanted, he still felt pretty guilty about it all. He hadn’t exactly done anything wrong but he knew that he fucked up, morally. It was fucked up to treat you like that, pulling you on a string until he decided what he wanted. You deserved better than that. And he was a hypocrite. He knew that much.

He felt uncomfortable knowing how he left things with you and he wanted to talk to you. He didn’t know the things he needed to say and he wasn’t sure where to begin. All he knew is that he wanted to talk to you. Things probably wouldn’t go back to normal, even if he tried his absolute best.

“Baekhyun?”

Baekhyun looked up from his plate. “Huh?”

“I said what are you thinking about?”

“Just about an old friend.”

Kira frowned. “Did something happen?”

He sighed. “I don’t really wanna talk about it.”

Kira didn’t press him about it and he was grateful. Guilt ate at him further as he realized that he wasn’t able to pay his own girlfriend the attention she deserved. His thoughts, somehow, would always shift toward you even in the presence of others.

She didn’t know what was bothering Baekhyun but it was bothering her. Lately, he seemed a little down. Things hadn’t changed too much but he always looked so...troubled. Kira wanted to make him feel better but she didn’t know where to begin. Did he even trust her enough to tell her what was going on in his life? Did he feel like he couldn’t be open with her? Was she not doing enough, as his girlfriend?

She reached across the table and grabbed his hand. She gave it a light squeeze because it was the only comfort she could give him.

You woke up and found yourself staring at the white ceiling as your phone’s alarm went off on the nightstand. You rolled over and shut off the blaring noise. As you sat up in bed, you let out a yawn. You got dressed and started getting ready for your 9AM shift at the waxing salon. The best part about being a receptionist was getting a discount on waxes and not having to do much. This job was a way to put extra money in your pocket and to study and do homework in between the small tasks you had to do to maintain a suitable environment for customers.

You got lost in your skincare routine as you found yourself thinking about Baekhyun again. You hadn’t seen him since that night and you avoided all contact with him within the friend group. Being that they were with Baekhyun a lot, you hadn’t seen the guys much lately. You couldn’t help but feel like the friend group was divided and that some of it was partially your fault.

You thought to yourself, If I see Baekhyun again, I think I could at least say hi…

Sehun occupied your thoughts most of the time but there were times when you gave in to temptation and your thoughts shifted to things like Baekhyun’s award-winning smile. Sehun was a gentleman. To be honest, he was everything you wanted in a guy. He let you know from the beginning that he had intentions of being in a relationship. It was rare to get that much information from a man these days.

He was considerate and he cared about you. And it showed. And when you hung out again last week, things were just as relaxed as last time. You felt like you could be yourself. The two of you went to get gelato in Little Italy, walked to the park, and talked for hours. And when you left each other, he didn’t try to come back to your apartment with you and he didn’t try to kiss you either. You were so used to guys rushing into things that this seemed a bit strange. It was great to meet a man with pure intentions.

Sehun would ask you if you wanted to Facetime a couple times. He’d ask you about your day, about what you ate, about what you were learning in class. He was asking these things because he genuinely wanted to know you. He wanted to know your thoughts, your ideas, and opinions. He wanted to dig deep into you, pulling out as much information as he could. He wanted to be able to paint the perfect picture of you, with his eyes closed shut.

You smiled to yourself as you got off of the train. You had twenty minutes to get to work from the train station. It only took five minutes from the train but you liked to come a bit early to get coffee. Your phone buzzed in your hands. Sehun left you a voice message.

“Hey, Y/N. Good morning! Hope you slept well last night and that you have a good day at work...I’m working from home today, thank God. I’m sick of my boss hovering over me while I’m trying to get work done..” He let out a chuckle. “Anyway, I can’t wait to see you later tonight.”

The two of you planned to go to a jazz lounge tonight. Neither of you had ever been and it seemed like a fun date. That was one thing you enjoyed about Sehun. He was always down to try new things with you. Everything you were experiencing with Sehun felt so new, so exciting. You never felt quite like this before.

You smiled at the sound of Sehun’s voice and, as you were about to send a voice note back, you happened to look up and find Baekhyun walking toward you. You were sure he hadn’t noticed you yet and you hoped to keep it that way. You kept walking, trying your best to remain unnoticed. As you walked past, you were sure he caught a glimpse of you because you could feel someone’s eyes glued onto you. It took everything in you not to turn around and look back at him.

You’d said that maybe you were at a point in your life where you could gather the courage and greet him if you were in the same room. Here you were, practically running away from him instead. You weren’t ready to cross paths with him; not right now. And to make matters worse, you looked a mess in your barely brushed bun and a not-so-special outfit. You’d imagined that when you eventually did cross paths, that you’d look good that day.

You walked past him and didn’t look back once.

Baekhyun got off the train feeling more tired than usual. He’d had a bit of trouble sleeping last night. He inched up the staircase slowly and when he looked up to see what the holdup was, he saw that it was a mother struggling to carry a stroller. Eventually, once someone realized that maybe they should help, another woman helped her up. Once the staircase congestion was cleared, Baekhyun was able to start moving.

As he headed toward the exit, he happened to look up from his phone and to his left. He had to do a double take to make sure it was you. It was. He knew your height and body size like the back of his hand. Even though he hadn’t been friends with you for a full year, he got to know you well for the past few months...until all of this drama came crashing into his life. He was at fault, he knew. This was a mess that he’d unintentionally created by not being straightforward and not being honest with himself or the people around him.

He didn’t know what an ideal world would look like. He wanted to be with Kira, no matter what. But, sometimes, his heart tugged toward you. He cared about you and he honestly missed you. He missed hanging out with you. He missed the simple things about his relationship with you like waiting for you to get out of class so you could eat lunch with him or helping you study for your exam, with flashcards. He missed simple things like FaceTime calls in the middle of the night when you had trouble sleeping and the fact that he could tell you anything. Part of him wished that he’d never crossed that line with you. He hated the fact that you weren’t in his life at all. Would you have been better off as just friends from the very beginning?

Baekhyun did see you, even if you didn’t know it. He saw you in all your glory. He saw you and your bun that you wore with the pale pink scrunchie that you loved. He saw you walking toward the University Place exit which could only mean that you were going to work. He remembered going there to pick you up from work last semester and watching you fidget at the desk, eagerly waiting for your coworker to come in and take over the desk duties.

He did notice you and a piece of his heart chipped away as he realized that a) you saw him and didn’t care to speak or b) you genuinely didn’t see him. A million possibilities and harsh realities flew through his head. He knew that you wouldn’t go out of your way to talk to him but had you just straight-up ignored him, like he didn’t exist?

Did the voicemail he left mean nothing to you? Did you listen to it at all? Did you delete it without even bothering to listen to it? He had so many questions and no answers. Were you done with him? Had he ruined the friendship the two of you once had forever? He felt a lot of things but his heart felt bruised, more than anything.

Was it really over?

Baekhyun wasn’t sure what kind of relationship he could have with you at this point but he knew that he didn’t want to live in a world without you in it. But on the other hand, he knew that he couldn’t have his cake and eat it, too.

You met Evie and Sadie in their dorm room after your shift. You still had a couple hours before you had planned on meeting Sehun. You put your bags down and sat down on the fluffy rug that lay between the two beds.

Your friends had started filling you in on a campus event tonight, where some of the school’s cultural organizations were going to have a dance off. You hadn’t planned on going since you made plans with Sehun but your friends didn’t seem to want to let it go.

“So you’re really not going to come to the Battle of the Orgs thing tonight?” asked Sadie, sitting down on the floor next to you.

You shook your head. “Well, I wasn’t really planning on it...”

Evie chimed in, turning away from her laptop and toward you. “Drew said it’d be really cool if you’d come. He’s hardly seen you since everything that happened with Baek. He’s performing...and the best part is that Baekhyun won’t be in the crowd cause he’s performing too.”

You raised your eyebrow, a curious expression taking over. “Since when?”

“Since like three weeks ago when one of the other guys dropped out and Drew begged him to join the lineup,” answered Evie. “Drew bugged the hell out of him and eventually Baekhyun agreed to it. You know how annoying he can be...”

“I saw Baekhyun in the train station this morning,” you said. “I was telling myself this morning that, if I saw him in the street, maybe I’d say hi...but I walked by and pretended I didn’t see him.”

“Would you really have said something?” asked Sadie.

You shrugged. “Probably not. But what would I even say to him?”

“Go fuck yourself is a good start,” Evie suggested. The three of you laughed for a moment before her expression became serious. “He really does seem to be dating that girl though.”

“Did you meet her?” you asked.

“For a minute,” Sadie said.

Evie added, “Baekhyun stopped by in the library and she was with him. So he introduced her...as his girlfriend.”

“What does she look like?”

“She looks mixed. She’s black and Japanese, I heard.”

“What’s she like?”

“Y/N, what does it matter? We met her for two seconds, in passing. Even if I had an answer for you, I wouldn’t tell you. You’re seeing Sehun, right? Why are you making Baekhyun more relevant than he is?”

You rolled your eyes, annoyed that your friend wasn’t going to give you more information. But, deeper down, you knew that she was right. It wasn’t healthy to ask those kinds of questions or to do things like look at Baekhyun’s snapchat stories hoping to find out more about this girl. It hurt that he had moved on. You wished that you were in her shoes. It felt unfair that this girl came into the picture and threw Baekhyun off course. You thought about what he said about having intentions of asking you out. If it was true, then the appearance of this Kira girl had ruined it. In a way, she had ruined the relationship that could’ve been yours.

But it wasn’t fair to put the blame on this girl. You didn’t know her and she didn’t know you. Sometimes you felt jealous but then you had to remind yourself that you deserved better and that if Baekhyun truly wanted to be with you in the first place, he would’ve been.

In all honesty, you should’ve listened to Evie’s advice in the first place. You should’ve known something was up when she asked if you were sure that Baekhyun really liked you. Maybe you should’ve questioned things sooner. Maybe if you’d brought it up sooner, the story wouldn’t have played out quite like this. Maybe you would’ve had the answers you needed much sooner. Maybe it would’ve hurt less.

You bit your lip. “Of course he’s not relevant. I’m seeing someone new and I’m moving on...just like he is!”

Part of you wanted to go to the Battle of the Orgs. You wanted to go because you genuinely wanted to see Drew perform and, if you were being completely honest with yourself, you wanted to see Baekhyun perform too. You never really saw him dance like this before. According to your friends, the Korean Student Association was going to perform a couple k-pop songs.

You didn’t know if you were ready to see Baekhyun in person, even if it was from a distance. Hell, you couldn’t even face him in the train station this morning. You just kept walking like a coward. You had imagined seeing Baekhyun again for the first time a million different ways. All of the scenarios you imagined in your head were nonchalant, petty, or neutral. You’d imagined scenarios where you hit him, scenarios where you threw shade at him, and scenarios like this morning—you walking past him, but without a care in the world. And you’d also imagined delusional scenarios where he explained that he didn’t want that girl anymore, and that you were the one he wanted. But you knew, at this point in time, that it wouldn’t happen.

You knew deep down that the only way to truly get over Baekhyun was to finally face him. That didn’t mean that you had to be friends or that things were going to go back to how they were. Shit, how could they after all that you’d been through? Seeing Baekhyun in person didn’t mean that you were committing to anything specific. It just meant that you’d be in the same room, breathing the same air. No harm in that, right?

You had to face Baekhyun sooner or later. You weren’t obligated to accept his apology or to be friends. The only way to get over him was to acknowledge his existence. Maybe you could get to a point where you could have a conversation. Maybe, just maybe, you could be acquaintances or something. But for now, you decided to just let things play out. You’d just be yourself. Maybe you wouldn’t even have to interact with Baekhyun in the first place.

You decided that you were going to go to the event tonight. You’d go to the event, support Drew, and then leave to go to the jazz bar with Sehun afterward. This solution was perfect, for everyone.

***

A/N: This is kind of a filler chapter but the next chapter will be longer and have the drama everyone’s craving, I promise! It’s worth the wait. And thank you to everyone who has supported me. And shoutout to my bestie for helping me through these ideas and giving me some much needed motivation!

Tag List: @shesdreaminginoverdose @multistania @jeonchan26 @myonlyaurora @keloiu @xxluckydreamsxx @multifandomeras @blanknearvana @jddcfc-blog @jummyjammy @mintaemark @kokobyunee @fortheloveofinfinite @littleflowercrown13 @wayvexo @to-all-the-stories-i-love @ggaayyyong @hyuniebaby @giriboyshogu @xyukheix @jekylluv @forbyun @endzii23 @puppyeoliepop @aa-ronpa @serendipitydreamsss @princemicorazon @sjkings @marimsun @baekhypnotized

Please DM me if you want to be added to the tag list! Hope you enjoyed this chapter :)

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padfootagain · 4 years ago

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A Very Rose Mistake (IV)

Part 4: How You Became Lambkin

Here we go for a new chapter! This is cute, but also, an important chapter for many reasons! The plot is now starting to unfold!!

No warnings of any kind to apply here, really, it's just rather innocent and cute. I hope you like this new chapter! Tell me what you think about it!

Word Count: 3911

Holmes Chapel, 2007

Shakespeare was a pain.

Maybe it was still relevant if you went to the theatre and saw professionals actually perform the play, but from the point of view of two 13 years old who had to read the plays for school… it was a pain.

Besides the language being old, there was also the fact that tons of the words on the page had just been made up. Or at least, it sounded that way. Because Harry had most certainly never heard any of those being used before and he had better things to do with his time than try and guess the meaning of these words. Playing football was one of them. And there was no way his mother would let him out of the house before he would have finished his homework.

There was only one way he could get to the pitch on time to play tonight with his friends. He had to ask for the help of the brightest mind he knew.

He got up from his bed where he was lying down with his copy of Henry V covering his face. He let the book fall on his bed while he reached for the piece of red glass that rested on the side of his window. He aimed at the sun, until the reflection of the light on the glass would dance over your own window. The perks of having his best friend living in the house right next to his: it was easy to reach you.

And indeed, it took you less than a minute to appear before you would appear on the other side of your own window. He couldn't help but grin at the sight.

Harry grabbed a piece of cardboard from behind his desk, that he had already prepared. One of the messages that you often used and both had kept, ready, just in case you would need them.

Help with homework?

He saw you laughing and shaking your head, but you grabbed your own cardboard, large enough to hide you completely behind it.

My place?

He merely nodded with a big goofy grin on his face, before grabbing his bag, his book and heading to the living room.

"Mum!" he called, thumping through the hall.

"Yes, I am not deaf," Anne laughed at her son.

"Can I go over to Y/N's to do my homework with her?"

"To do your homework or play videogames?"

"I have a match tonight."

"Ha… so it's really for homework then! Sure, you can go. Bring some snacks if you want, I bought some cookies, the ones she likes."

"Thanks mum! I'll go directly to the field when I'm done…"

"No, you won't. You're going to come back here to drop off your stuff and to get changed and then you'll go to the field."

He heaved a sigh, but complied without arguing.

"Okay. Bye!"

"Love you!"

But Harry was already slamming the front door shut and sprinting towards your house. Your mother was waiting for him with her door open and an amused smile on her face.

"Hello, Harry! How are you today?"

"Great! Thank you, Mrs. Y/L/N!"

"Y/N's in her bedroom. Do you want to bring up some snacks?"

"I've brought some cookies my mum bought today."

"How nice! Well, go ahead then!"

"Thanks!"

He took off his shoes, placing them in the space that was saved for him in the hall, before sprinting up the stairs to your room.

He closed the door behind him.

"Hey! Thanks, I'm struggling with this bloody play!"

You merely chuckled, resting your back against your wall as you sat on your bed.

"It's alright, I haven't started that one yet."

"Have you done maths already?"

"Yep! Just finished."

"Me too. But that English stuff… ugh…"

He climbed on your bed by your side, dragging behind him his notebook, pencils and his Shakespearean play.

Harry gave you some time to catch up with him on the assignment, although he hadn't done much yet. You then spent some time trying to analyse the text and answer the questions on your assignment about the scene.

Harry was annoyed to say the least.

"What are these words, even…" he groaned.

"Come on… some are cute… 'lambkin', that's cute!"

"Lambkin?! You think calling your girlfriend lambkin is cute?"

"I do. It's sweet!"

Harry rolled his eyes.

"Alright, then, I'll call you that from now on. We'll see for how long you find it cute."

You exploded in laughter, the sound enough to erase his grumpy frown.

"That's not fair! I would be the only one with a ridiculous nickname like that!" you protested.

"You are not calling me lambkin. Ever."

"Alright," you shook your head at his silly remark. "After we're done with this, we'll look for a nickname for you."

"I'm going to the field after, I'm playing with the guys."

"That just means I'll choose whatever I want to laugh at you!"

"Wow… scary… lambkin."

You narrowed your eyes at each other, and you considered his banter as a challenge.

"You're gonna regret that, Styles."

"Oh, am I, lambkin?"

But you could only keep up the serious act for a few more seconds, before you both let go and were lost in a fit of laughter.

You did manage to finish your homework on time for Harry to go play football with the guys. You spent the rest of your allowed time before a screen looking for old and ridiculous nicknames to use against Harry on your computer.

You eventually found the perfect one.

His phone beeped after he was back home, about to go to bed. He had changed in his pyjamas and was about to turn off the lights for the night when the sound rang through the room.

"Harry! Go to bed, you have school tomorrow," Anne ordered, as she was passing by in the corridor right at that moment.

"I am going to bed! It's Y/N!"

"If you're not in bed in five minutes…"

"I am going!"

He checked your text all the same.

Y/N: I've found your nickname. You are chuckaboo.

He snorted, answering once he was buried under his blankets.

Harry: What does that even mean?

He put his phone on silence to avoid his mother hearing your response.

Y/N: It's a term of endearment to call a friend. Fits just right. Plus, I think it suits you, chuckaboo.

Harry: You'd better not call me like that at school.

Y/N: Oh, I will :)

He laughed, despite feigning anger in his next response. You merely replied with another smiley face, and wished him good night.

He went to sleep with an amused smile on his face.

It was just a joke, it would last for a few days before you would both grow tired of it. Stupid nicknames that would make you laugh for a while. Or so he thought, at least.

Lambkin and Chuckaboo.

What a ridiculous pair…

Loch Lomond, 2020

Harry kept on holding your hand as you settled around the large table that had been set for your family. The atmosphere was more relaxed as you waited for Amy and her family to join all of you over dinner. Your mom and you sat between your father and Harry, a protection of some sort against the nasty glances that your dad kept on throwing at your fake boyfriend. Dinner was merry, and Amy's family provided a nice distraction for your own family members to focus on. Harry spent most of the evening lost in a deep conversation with Amy's grandfather about 'the music back then', and he seemed to blend in just fine, not that you had ever had any doubt that he would.

One chair though had been left empty. In the large hall decorated with flickering lights, the view upon the loch growing darker and darker as the hours passed, until there was nothing left to see but the stary sky, there was one empty spot. It was for one of Amy's cousins, who had to work late at the hospital in Glasgow, where he worked as a nurse, apparently. Patrick, was his name, and he was set to sit right opposite you. It's only when you were waiting for dessert that he appeared.

And you struggled quite a bit to hide your reaction.

Because Patrick was handsome. Patrick was very handsome. Patrick was also 1000% your type.

And Patrick was set right across from you around the long, rectangular table.

He gave a kiss to his family, was introduced properly by an Amy that was on her way to getting from tipsy to drunk, and he seemed a little embarrassed by her antiques as she praised him for his work in medicine and called all who were single around the table to 'give him a ring'. And you found it cute.

You decided it was your duty, as you were the person sitting across from him, to make some small talk. Anyway, your parents were entertaining a conversation of their own that you weren't particularly interested in, and Harry and Amy's grandfather were lost in a vivid argument about Carole King's best song on Tapestry.

"I'm Y/N!" you introduced yourself with a welcoming smile. "Cassie's cousin."

"Oh, so we're the cousins then! Nice to meet you!" he greeted you with a warm smile as well.

And he had a nice smile. Very nice smile, indeed…

"So… you're a nurse then!"

He ran a hand in his hair, embarrassed.

"Yeah, I am. Sorry about her rant, I think she's had too much to drink."

"It's her wedding, I reckon she has the right to have a little fun."

"I guess. And what do you do for a living?"

You were interrupted by the dessert arriving, and you waited for the waiters to have left to answer.

"I'm studying for a PhD in history."

"Oh, wow."

He seemed genuinely impressed, which was always nice to hear. You waited for the next question to strike what do you do with a PhD in history, but it didn't come. Instead he asked another question, seeming genuinely interested.

"What is your thesis about?"

"The influence and impact of the XIXth century international exchanges and relations on modern politics."

"Wow."

"It's a mouthful," you joked, nodding your head.

"No, no! It sounds very interesting! Where do you study."

"California. But before that I got my degree in Oxford."

"Dear God… I'm sitting in front of the next Nobel Prize."

You laughed, shying away.

"No, absolutely not. Besides, I don't even think there is one to congratulate historians."

"A shame. I would have bet on you."

You did notice the way he shot you a shy smile. And you did notice the way he didn't look away, and didn't look for another conversation to settle into. He was focused on you while you ate your dessert, and you did the same.

Your conversation went on when the coffees and teas were served. And you had to admit that you liked it that way. He was charming, with a cute Scottish accent, and eyes that glimmered in the yellowish light of the room.

It's only when your cup of coffee was empty that Harry took your hand in his again, planting your feet right back to Earth, and reminding you of what you were here for in the first place.

He gave you a smile, before guiding your hand up to his lips to place a kiss over your knuckles, surprising you with the tender gesture and making your heart rush a little more as he looked at you with the tenderest of gazes.

"Are you tired, babe? Or would you like to take a walk with me? I could use some fresh air."

Your heart stumbled a little at the pet name, and you didn't like it. You didn't like it one bit, so you forced the organ to stop its little dance.

"Sure."

You bid everyone a good night -and did notice the disappointed look Patrick gave you as you abruptly ended your conversation in order to leave with Harry - and some other people retreated to their rooms at the same time as you, while you followed Harry outside.

It was cold outside, a heavy wind sweeping skeleton leaves to gather at your feet. You could hear the shushed rumble of conversations on the other side of the windows and the wind caught in the branches and lifting the water of the loch in clapping waves. Harry offered you his arm, and as you noticed that you could still be seen from the table inside, you took it with a grateful smile.

You walked along the shore in silence for a few minutes, your gaze distracted from the dark path by the shining lights above your head, but you weren't worried about falling, not when you were holding Harry's arm. He would catch you before you could fall.

He finally heaved a sigh.

"Well, that wasn't a complete disaster. It went better later on, don't you think?"

"Yeah, I reckon that once the shock had passed, it was alright," you nodded.

"Except for you father, of course. Judging by the way he was eyeing me all night, he probably will try to cut off my balls before the end of the week."

You laughed at that, the sound clear and joyful, luminous over the dark scenery that surrounded you. But the reflexions of the stars over the water was lovely all the same. They seemed brighter to Harry as your laughter echoed a little longer around both of you.

"He's not so fond of the idea. Don't know why."

Harry shrugged.

"Must think I'm not good enough for you."

You rolled your eyes, shaking your head.

"Anyway… I think we're getting away with it."

"Getting the hang of it, babe?"

"Oh, shut up, chuckaboo."

"Ha, here you are again, back to your normal self. Will you start punching me next?"

"I've never punched you!"

"But you've threatened to do so dozens of times."

"I am very good at boxing."

His smile grew more tender, a little melancholic as well, but you attributed it to the quiet of the place that surrounded you. You were away from the lodge now, enough so for voices to have disappeared. It was only you, Harry, and the whisper of autumn leaves now.

"You're good at everything, Y/N."

There was a moment of silence, while you stared at him. But then, his expression grew a little mischievous, and he faked to be lost in thought.

"Except at cooking, and singing, and playing guitar, and most definitely climbing, and gymnastics, and…"

"Yeah, okay, I get it, you jerk!" you stopped him, punching his arm, although your gesture wasn't violent enough to hurt. Still, Harry dramatically held his arm as if you had thrown him your stronger uppercut.

"See, I knew it! Knew you would end up doing it for real, instead of only threatening me with your punches!"

"Well, you should shut up before I do it again."

"You're so cruel, lambkin," he tried to sound convincing, but the goofy smile upon his lips betrayed his thoughts.

You shook your head at him, wheezing.

You walked in silence for a little longer, before deciding to go back to the lodge. You were still holding Harry's arm, even if no one was around to see the two of you pretend. None of you acknowledge the fact, merely choosing to act as if you weren't. Maybe, a voice in your mind explained it by acting in case someone would bump into the two of you. You knew it wasn't the truth though, but you pretended that it was for the few minutes more that the gesture lasted while you walked on the edge of the water and under the tall trees.

"So… Patrick?" Harry asked after a long silence.

"He's nice!" you answered with a smile. "He's a nice chap!"

"Hmm," Harry nodded. "You did seem to have fun with him tonight. Even thought that maybe you didn't need my services anymore."

"Pfft! Don't be ridiculous! I've just talked with him for 5 minutes."

"Almost an hour, actually."

You narrowed your eyes at him.

"You counted?"

He rolled his eyes at you.

"I just noticed it was a long conversation."

"Hmm…"

"You know, we can still tell the truth to everyone, and you can take your shot with Patrick."

You didn't know how to describe the tone he used to say the man's name, but it wasn't oozing with fondness, that was for certain. You looked at him suspiciously, a smirk creeping its way to your lips.

"Are you… jealous?"

"Jealous? Me?"

"You're the jealous type, don't deny it."

"And don't flatter yourself. We're not really together, remember? Why would I be jealous."

"I don't know, but you sound like you are."

"I'm not jealous."

"Good."

"But do you like him?"

You shrugged.

"I don't know. I think he's attractive. I think he's nice. So…"

"You like him."

"He's alright so far. And he is my type."

Harry raised an eyebrow, before his features molded into a frown instead. His mind couldn't help but compare himself to Patrick, and point out everything that was different between them.

"Am I your type?" he asked after a long silence.

You laughed, taken aback.

"What kind of question is that?"

He shrugged.

"I don't know. Just wondering. I'm playing your boyfriend for a week, but… would I be your type? Had I not met you when we were five and crashed your ice-cream into your face… had you met me tonight instead of Patrick… would you have thought that I was your type?"

You looked away, finally letting go of his arm, and the lack of contact between your two bodies made Harry regret his question.

"I don't know," you lied, before finding back your composure, and shooting him a smile. "But you're my boyfriend for this week. So for the next seven days, you are most definitely my type, honey."

He laughed, shaking his head. You had walked back to the lodge, and he opened the door for you, dramatically bowing before you to let you through first.

"After you, my love."

Harry went first to take a shower, and then it was your turn. Some warm water was just what your tired muscles needed to relax after your busy day. When you walked out of the bathroom, a little bit of fog following you through the door, Harry was lying on the bed, atop the blankets, scrolling on his phone.

He had changed into a comfortable jumper and a pair or pyjama pants that seemed warmed and soft. His curls were still damped, wetting his pillow, but he didn't seem to mind it at all.

He looked up when you stepped out of the bathroom though, and you didn't fail to notice the way his eyes settled on your legs before hurrying to your face while his cheeks blushed.

Your pyjama shorts weren't that short at all, stopping right above your knees. Still, it seemed enough to make Harry's cheekbones and ears turn crimson. You wore an old Treat People With Kindness jumper too, matching his grey hoodie.

"You're alright, Harry?" you asked, rather puzzled by his reaction.

"Sure, why?"

"You're blushing."

"I'm not."

"You are."

"It's nothing. I'm just tired."

You weren't convinced, but chose to drop the subject, your own fatigue weighing on you. So you shrugged instead, finishing to get ready for bed.

You slipped under the covers and heaved a sigh as your head hit the pillow.

"Tired?" he asked, and you could only hum and nod in response.

He hesitated for a second, while you closed your eyes.

"There's an extra blanket. I can sleep on top of the covers, and you under them, if you want."

You opened your eyes again to look at him.

"Would that make you feel more comfortable?"

He considered your question, and shrugged.

"I don't know. Maybe?"

"I don't really care. But… maybe for tonight, you can do that. Won't you be cold though?"

"It's quite warm in here. And the blanket looks cosy."

"Alright, but don't hesitate to get under the covers if you're too cold. I don't mind if you do."

"Okay," he nodded, before getting up to get the blanket.

He lied down by your side again, getting comfortable, before he would turn off the lamp on his nightstand, and you did the same, letting darkness take over every inch of the room, looking darker than it really was as your eyes got used to the shadows.

"Goodnight Harry."

"Goodnight, Y/N."

You turned to your side, trying to get comfortable too, and your foot gently bumped into his through the layers of sheets and blankets as you moved.

"Sorry," you quipped, moving your foot away.

"'S okay," he replied, his voice lower than usual.

You let silence settle for a while, but it felt strange. Awkward. There was something unspoken hovering above the two of you, you could cut the tension in the air with a knife.

"Harry?"

"Hmm?"

"I feel weird."

"Weird? You mean sick?" he asked with worry in his tone now.

"No, I mean… it's a little weird sleeping next to you. Why though? We've done that since we were six."

He shrugged, but couldn't deny that he was feeling the same. His heart was beating so fast, he was worried you would hear it in the silent night.

"Maybe it's because we're not children anymore," he whispered.

You hummed in response.

"And we haven't done it in a long time too," you added, and he heard you nodding, your cheek brushing against your pillow.

He took a deep breath before speaking again, his tone hesitant.

"Do you… would you feel better if I took the couch?"

You considered his offer, but shook your head.

"No, I… I don't feel uncomfortable. It's just… strange."

It was his turn to hum.

"Would you feel better on the couch?" you asked him.

"No, it's… it's a nice weird."

"Yeah, it is."

"I'm just… it makes me a little nervous."

"Nervous?"

He made a face, that you couldn't see, but you would have found it adorable if you had.

"I'm afraid I'll wake you up with my snoring. Or speak some nonsense in my sleep. Or you wake up tomorrow morning and see me drooling, with saliva all over my face."

You laughed at him, reaching in the dark to touch his arm. You patted the muscles tenderly.

"Don't worry, chuckaboo. I've seen worse! Seen you throwing up a fair amount of time. Also, I'll just punch you again to wake you up if you start snoring too much."

He laughed, and both of your laughter mingling through the room made most of the tension in the room disappear.

"You're right. Besides, maybe you'll be the one waking me up because of your snoring!" Harry went on.

"I don't snore!" you snorted.

"You do. I've heard you before."

"Well, then, you can wake me up if I do."

You moved your fingers away from his arm, but they lingered on the mattress near him all the same, in the little space between the two of you.

"Sleep well, lambkin," Harry whispered, closing his eyes, and when you answered, you had the same smile on your lips as the one that he wore.

"You too, chuckaboo."

************************************

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timextoxhajima · 4 years ago

Text

HOSTIS, Chapter VII: Partium, The Party

Previous Chapter (VI: Venerum)

Member: Lee Hyunjae (tbz)

Genre (by chapter): comedy, drama, angst???

Category: Short Novel/Long Series

aphrodite was talking to ares, but it was the wrong ares.

five days of being a real doctor.

patients to take care of. medical records to keep up with.

for awhile, it seemed so quiet; life was nothing but tranquil for the last five days. even lucifer next door seemed so cooped up in his own patients to deal with that he hadn’t really had the time or energy to come and annoy you.

maybe it was zeus’ way of telling you that he was done making two areses play a never-ending war. all the two of you really needed was a reminder that you were both finally in a place you wanted to be. you’ve spent most of your life studying and drowning in words and science to get here; why waste that effort by throwing yourself into a wrestling ring with him?

but zeus also seemed to be petty with how much aphrodite he was offering you.

since eric sent you home last week, you haven’t seen him since. doctor kim hasn’t emailed you or told doctor choi that you were needed in the research department, neither were you available in any given point of time to even go to the research department to look for the intern.

you felt like a young girl who just realised she had the biggest, fattest crush on the cutest guy in school, and not being able to see him was arguably one of the most heart wrenching things you could possibly feel, even at this age.

he was kind, cute, not to mention lively and enthusiastic, and god, those eyes.

your scheduled rounds were about ten minutes away, so letting yourself fall back into the pillows and feathers and wedding bells in your head wasn’t so difficult. you’ve learnt to treat ten minutes like precious treasure despite being a full-fledged doctor for only five days.

the gentle ripples of the piano playing from the stereo behind you loosens all the knots in your shoulders, and your head falls back into the seat with your eyes fluttered shut.

eric son young jae...

ding

one of your eyes open upon the duty call from the office computer, and you notice the newest email coming from another staff member you don’t recognise. giving yourself a little shake, you sit back up and click on the newest email, the contents of it surprisingly not as important as you were predicting it to be.

from: lee sang yeon (asst. head of dept)

to: the neurology dept, the neuro-research dept

subject: the NRD quarterly party

dear all,

every three months in a year, the neurology department (NRD) has a strict tradition of throwing a party to celebrate and congratulate the hard work all the doctors in our department have put in.

in these quarterly parties, we sing cheers to successful operations with high-risk, prestigious achievements and research findings, and new doctors after their 2-week-mentee period has ended.

this year shall not be any different.

despite the NRD’s unofficial events management team having some trouble finding a location to throw our party, we are pleased to share our gratitude to our new doctor, lee hyunjae, for offering his home for this grand celebration.

the party will be held this friday (two days from now) at the following address attached to this email.

do inform either me or doctor choi young joon if you are unable to be present.

thank you, and we see you there!

oh, for fucks’ sake.

of all places?

a soft sigh exhales through your nose and you minimise the window, gathering your pens and patient files to begin on your rounds.

the hallway of the ward spaces come into view once you exit the lift, and you were just about to turn into one of the wards that had three patients in them.

“good morning mrs kang.”

the voice halts you in your tracks, and you back up against the wall so nobody in the ward sees you.

“good morning doctor lee, how are you doing today? your rounds are never this early,” the frail lady, who was your patient, sounded so calm and relaxed; you could almost imagine the look on her face.

you remember the first time you met her. mrs kang was previously doctor choi’s patient, so she first saw you when both you and lee hyunjae were trailing him. she was initially cold and reserved, even to doctor choi, but with the both of you, she looked at you like she was looking at her own children.

“i decided to pop by my patients earlier today to chat with them, see if they understand why they’re really in the hospital,” you hear the clacking of the clipboard that was slotted into a holder at the end of the bed, and for a moment you wonder why he was even bothering himself with your patient. “sometimes older patients don’t really grasp the importance of their health and they just go along with the flow while their kids admit them to the hospital.”

a pause.

“how is mr yoon over there? he’s your patient, right?”

“mr yoon’s doing alright, but he’s definitely had better days,” the clipboard slides back into the slot at the edge of the bed, and you hear his footsteps shift around in the ward. “how are you doing? how’s doctor l/n treating you?”

“oh, she’s wonderful, sometimes i wonder why i couldn’t have two doctors because i’d definitely have the both of you to take care of me in my time here.”

that last line pulled on your heartstrings, and you know it was terribly unprofessional of you to even feel it, but your heart shattered upon her words.

mrs kang was a amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (ALS) patient and she was only deemed as low-risk because doctor choi gave her another year to live; all you had to do was make sure her condition didn’t spiral.

yet, it was difficult to swallow that she was aware her time was limited, and there was nothing she could do about it. if lee hyunjae has read her patient records, then he would know why she said that.

you hear a chair get lifted off the ground and it sets down barely a second later, a soft shuffling motivating you to angle your head into the ward, keeping most of your body outside.

the sight of him sitting by the hospital bed, by your patient, with absolutely no clue you were standing right outside, rippled gentle chills throughout your body. the view was so rare and unfamiliar, the disbelief that filled your chest was almost difficult to contain.

“rest assured, we will stay with you for as long as you need. if doctor l/n or doctor choi isn’t around to attend to you, then i will, alright?”

mr yoon coughs loudly, and lee hyunjae’s attention gets snatched away.

“give me a moment, would you?”

the chair doesn’t make a sound as he carefully gets up and returns to his patient, and you grasp this chance to walk in to avoid creating an awkward situation.

“good morning, mrs kang,” a polite smile automatically surfaces on your lips, and you pick up her records to tally with the one you had. “how are you feeling today?”

“i’ve had better days but definitely better than yesterday. how are you?”

“i’m going to a party on friday night, jealous?”

she scoffs before bursting into soft laughter, the sound of her happiness when you teased her making your heart feel so warm and at ease. your eyes and hands start to wander around her iv drip and her medicine schedule located by the side of her bed, and you could feel her eyes follow your every move while she comes down from her high.

“i met my husband when i went to the craziest party i had in my life,” the little story hugs your heart with warm arms while you click your pen and jot down some routinely checks.

“maybe you’ll meet yours this friday,” her eyes were glistening with such wonder, you had to physically restrain yourself from souring your nose.

“i pretty much already know everybody who’s going to the party this friday,” a pout on your face causes her to chuckle.

“staff party?”

“yeah.”

“maybe you’ll find out that someone you already know is the right one for you.”

“oh, god forbid that happens. i’m fine on my own and i always will be,” a scoff rumbles in the back of your mouth and you side-eye her as you finish up your checks.

“that’s what everybody says until they find the right one.”

you provide her with a small smile, swiftly double-checking all her needs. your pen was jotting down the last round of checks before her attention rides past you.

“goodbye, doctor lee!”

“bye, mrs kang. rest well, and i’ll see you tomorrow when i come to check on mr yoon.”

how was it that the grin on her face was given and caused by lucifer? watching him interact with her so carefully and kindly made you think you’ve just been fighting with a twin brother instead.

there was absolutely no way that it was the same person.

but you couldn’t deny the admiration for his professionalism and his dedication to his job. he didn’t need to care or have such a candid conversation with mrs kang, especially not when she wasn’t even his patient.

not just that, he didn’t even say anything horrible about you.

he could’ve, but he didn’t.

it made you feel slightly guilty, but where there was guilt, there was resent; there was a reminder that he spent half his life trying to mess with yours. his professionalism didn’t warrant any change in attitude from you.

friday comes by in a flash, and the sudden realisation that you were going to be stuck in hell the entire night, pretending like you weren’t, made you want to hurl your lunch.

eric was going to be there, and you haven’t seen him in almost a week. you weren’t entirely sure why though; firstly, because you didn’t ask anybody why you weren’t needed at the research department -- there was no reason to. secondly, doctor kim looked like he was having fun dumping a lot of the tinier pieces of research required on him. so while you were making your rounds and being the doctor you were now, eric was probably suffocating from the mounts of research information doctor kim was allocating him.

you couldn’t remember the last time you decided wearing jeans and a one-sleeved top was a good idea, but you did it anyway. your face was caked with more makeup than you usually wore to the hospital, only because you were ready to let yourself go and really soak yourself in the idea of a party, not caring that everybody there was going to be a qualified neurologist or research officer.

you had one goal tonight, and that was to win your aphrodite over.

the house looked like a set from a horror movie; you know, the one where you walk in thinking everything would be perfect but everybody dies.

maybe it was just your hatred for the owner.

“HEY!” the door swings open when you knock on it, and the unusually loud music was literally making eric scream over the bass thumping throughout the walls of the house. “was just wondering when you’d get here!”

your ankle boots give you an extra height boost, so eric was just slightly above eye level now. he takes the pack of beer from your hands and nods you into the house, a couple of other neurologists you recognise from regularly walking past them greeting you.

“where’s doctor lee?” your voice was literally inaudible, but you could hear the strained vibrations in your throat as he places the pack of beer on the kitchen counter.

“who? oh!” his eyes dart behind you and he tip-toes, craning his neck to look for the person you asked for. “i think he’s in the living room talking to someone!”

the first reaction to his response was to turn around and search for lucifer, wondering who in the right frame of mind would even want to entertain him. but you remember all the love letters he received throughout school, so it wasn’t a surprise when you see him chatting with a female doctor.

his lips were moving, and he was nodding every other second, looking like she was pi telling the story of being stranded in the middle of the ocean.

he suddenly looks up, and your eyes involuntarily lock for a moment. the non-physical contact drills shivers down your spine when you realise the last time you even looked at him was a week ago, when you saw him in the carpark before and after you tripped into eric’s arms.

eric’s voice tears your attention away from lee hyunjae though, and you lean your torso over the kitchen island to watch him fill two cups with punch.

“are you alright with punch?” his eyes look up at you through his lashes, pushing one cup across the table to you. “i normally don’t offer beer to girls.”

a chuckle pulls your lips apart, and the punch washes down your throat easily. “‘normally’, huh?”

he notices the mockery in your voice and he smiles, that gorgeous sight forcing butterflies into you.

"doesn't it feel like it's been forever since we last met?" he gestures for your cup and you slide it back to him.

"it's been a whole week," you pause and walk around the kitchen island so that he wouldn't need to risk spilling the drink all over the surface if he wanted to slide it over again. "my duties officially started this week and doctor kim didn't need us over at the research department."

"ohhhhh, so that's why..."

"you sound disappointed," you rest one hand against the kitchen island, barely keeping an arm's length distance away from him.

"i was looking forward to hanging out with you more, and i considered going over to the neuro department to look for you but i was afraid i was going to be disruptive," he hands you the cup, and you lean one hip on the edge. the drink in the cup was swirling in circles while you watched him fill his own, and from the corner of your eye you catch lee hyunjae talking to another female doctor, this time right at the foot of the stairs near the entrance of the kitchen.

"actually--" he pulls the cup away from his lips just as he was about to take a sip. blinking at him as he whirls around the kitchen before returning with a napkin, pulling out a pen from a drawer that you didn't even know why it was there, he begins jotting down his... number?

"here's my number," the blue ink on the napkin was a little pathetic, but it was adequate for all the digits to show.

you do a little imaginary punch of triumph into the air, your chest feeling a little weightless when he pushes it across the counter to you. "drop me a text and we'll hang out. even after my intern ends, we can totally get a drink together!"

blood and shyness rush up to your face, and you thank the house for having the worst lighting ever to hide your blush.

"my phone's dead and it's rude to ask for someone else's phone to save my number in."

"aw, you're such a sweetheart," the coo that comes off your tongue was packed with innuendo and you push yourself away from the table so you could shove it into your pocket. but the friction between your shoes when you make a misstep pushes you off your balance, you fall again, straight into eric's arms.

because of the slight change in height, eric now has his arm wrapped around your waist. his chest becomes your landing space for your palm, and your legs become softer when you look up through your mascara coated lashes at him.

"you really need to work on your balance."

the butterflies in your stomach intensify their movements when he pulls you up, and your arms were the only thing keeping the two of you apart.

"i do, don't i?" the blaring noise of the music gets cancelled out, and you catch the moment that eric hesitates before he leans forward into you. his chest starts to push your hands over his shoulders and the kiss becomes like a dream.

subconsciously, you start cancelling out the loud music, and for a moment you were grateful that everybody else was probably too occupied screaming at whoever it was they were talking to.

neither of your lips move, making the kiss so soft and warm and fuzzy.

it didn't last very long, but it was long enough for you to taste the bit of beer he probably had before you came.

eric slowly pulls away, his eyes immediately searching for yours to make sure you weren't in any way uncomfortable.

"oh," the realisation sinks in, and his hold around you loosens. "i'm sorry, i didn't--"

"no, no, it's fine," he releases you, and you suck your lips between your teeth, slightly desperate to taste the rest of him in your mouth.

"i'm... i'm gonna go catch up with the other... people," the effort to try to mask his embarrassment was so astoundingly adorable, you couldn't resist the large smile that broke out on your face. "i'll catch you later."

he gives you an awkward wave as he runs off, and you turn your body to look for the pack of beer you brought. your mind relentlessly throws you back to that kiss and you replay it a billion times in your head, the alcohol in the beer only making you fall more in love with something that was already over.

"hey, doctor l/n, right?"

the voice was unfamiliar, and you look up to see someone you've only seen in pictures in doctor choi's office.

"oh, yes, i am," hurriedly gulping down the beer in your mouth, you put the can down and pat your palm on your jeans. "i'm guessing you're... doctor lee sang yeon?"

he nods and offers to shake your hand, which you gladly take. there was a can of beer in his free hand as well, and it felt like he deliberately displayed it to you so you wouldn't feel too awkward.

"mhm, my apologies that i haven't been around to welcome you and... doctor lee hyunjae, was it?"

ew.

"oh, right, yeah."

"i was away the last two weeks because i was hired as a short term lecture in a local med-school."

“that’s so cool,” the beer can finds your lips again and you take a big gulp.

you spend easily the next hour talking to sang yeon, who you found out was the hospital’s youngest assistant department head.

not only that, he even praised your research work. apparently, doctor kim had already read both yours and lucifer’s research reports and both provided him with fascinating results.

but what was even more gratifying was that lee sang yeon never said a word about lucifer’s report. drinking beer while listening to sang yeon talk about your report was like eating sugar or a tub of ice cream.

most of the night was reserved for talking to lee sang yeon, looking out for eric and seeing his bright smile whenever he catches you looking at him. occasionally, doctor kim would come round the kitchen looking for more beer, but doctor choi was always around to stop him.

the night slowly settles in, and you could tell it was getting late when some of your colleagues who you just met began to leave the house.

you would’ve too, but eric was still here.

worry and displeasure start to creep up on you like mike on halloween when you spot lucifer talking to eric, but judging by the smile spread across his face, lucifer wasn’t doing much besides making the little puppy happy.

one of your colleagues was going off about one of her patients the previous year, so your attention felt so oddly torn.

nonetheless, it was slightly sickening to know that though aphrodite was talking to ares, it was the wrong ares.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter VIII: Invidia

#hyunjae #the boyz fanfic #hyunjae fanfic #lee hyunjae #the boyz #the boyz hyunjae #timetohajima

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perseusjackson-jasongrace · 4 years ago

Text

Empires on the Horizon IV

Jason is a CEO: Part IV

Here’s my masterlist for the next part and my other stuff

new beginnings

look fragile

like glass

but when grabbed

sparkle

like diamonds

-badpoetry

“Good morning Mr Grace,” Grover Underwood smiled from his usual spot behind the coffee machine.

“Morning, how are you?”

“Much happier for seeing you less like someone kicked your puppy,” He gave Jason a knowing look.

“How?”

“There are some things the brain cannot hide, matters of the heart are often one of them.”

He didn’t really have any reply to that, so he gave the man an awkward smile and shrugged.

“Your usual then?”

“Yes please, and an iced coffee for Hazel.”

“Ah where is the darling this morning?”

“She’s coming into the office later, something about needing to go home first? She must have stayed at a friend’s place.”

Grover raised a dark brow, “Mhmm and where is your driver this morning? I noticed you drove yourself in today.”

“Uh I think Frank took the day off,” He frowned trying to piece the conversation he’d had with his friend in his sleep-deprived brain.

“Oh interesting,” Grover’s chocolate brown eyes twinkled in amusement, but before Jason could question him a warm cup was being shoved into his hand and he was being ushered away to wait for the iced coffee.

Collapsing into a chair, he pushed his glasses up his nose and wrapped his scarf tighter around his neck. Winter was beautiful but gods it was cold. He glanced around the café taking in the familiar forest green walls and dark wood floors. There was no sun streaming through the windows today so the gold accents on the tables were dulled and dark, like hidden bronze. He traced his fingers around the edge of his cup, losing himself in the motion, in the feeling of heat on his cold fingers, in the small gusts of wind against his cheeks as the door opened and closed, in the noise of a bustling store, in the–

“Hello Jason,”

“Luke,” He took a deep breath, “Fuck off.”

“Aw don’t be like that,” He sniggered.

“Please Luke, I don’t have the energy for this right now,” Exhaustion was a thousand-ton weight on his bones.

“That’s your problem Jason you never wanted to take things head on. It was always let’s wait for this, let’s get their opinion first, let’s just give it a couple weeks. You could have had the world begging at your fingertips if you just went for what you wanted.”

“Are you done?”

Luke’s responding laugh was malicious, “You are so-“

“Leave.” His voice was stone.

His ex-boyfriend scoffed, “Pathetic.”

Jason watched as the face he had been so in love with sneered at him, the scar running down a pale cheek twisting into malice. His soul ached for what could have been, it burned for what now was. It always surprised him how drained he felt after every interaction with Luke- like crashing down from a potent high. Being with Luke was a high, was euphoria and hope and sin. What the fuck went wrong?

His phone buzzed in his pocket.

“Talk to me,”

“Why do you insist on answering the phone like you’re some sort of mafia boss?” His sister grumbled.

“Hello to you too Thalia,”

“I just wanted to let you know that I’ve set you up on a date tonight. Six-thirty at Sun and Songs.”

He groaned, “No. I am not in the mood.”

“Jason Grace,” She started; he could feel a rant coming on, “You cannot stop living your life because you have a wanker of an ex-boyfriend. You have been in a slump since Luke and it is affecting you in ways you’re too scared to admit.”

“It is not affecting me,” He was tired of having this fight, “I literally dated Piper for like three months.”

“Mhm and were you happy? Did you put all you could into the relationship?” She didn’t wait for his response, “No, you may have been a little happier, but you weren’t you. So you will go on this date tonight and in five years when we’re planning your wedding you better be thanking me in your speech.”

“Gods Thals,” He snorted, “We haven’t even gone on the date yet and you’re already planning a wedding?”

“Wait does that mean you agree to it?” She squealed through the phone.

“Yes loser,” He held in a laugh, “I’ll go on the date. But if it doesn’t work out you drop all of this. No more setting me up, no more interfering.”

“Yes sir. Now, how work’s going?”

“Besides the fact that Project Hestia is on hold because of this stupid contract everything is good.”

“Isn’t your fancy lawyer lady sorting it out?” She muttered.

“Reyna is a great lawyer and you know it.”

“Yea but she’s also my ex-girlfriend so I get to be a little resentful.”

He snorted at that, “Of course, and how are you?”

“I’m good. The Conservatory is still standing so I can’t be doing too many things wrong.”

“Didn’t you guys get cheetah cubs this weekend?”

“Oh Jase!” His sister cried, “They are just the absolute cutest things. Did you know cheetahs are so shy that some conservationists and wild-life biologists recommend giving them emotional support puppies?”

“So what you guys got puppies and cubs?”

“We haven’t got the puppies yet; they’re only arriving this week.”

“Well send me pictures when they’re together, maybe I’ll have them framed and hung around the office as a morale booster.”

She laughed, the sound crackly through the speaker, “Will do little bro. Listen I have to go but call me tomorrow to tell me about the date.”

“Wait!” He yelled, ignoring the weird looks from the café patrons as he walked out, “What’s her name?”

“Zoe.”

***

Jason was nervous. That was the only explanation for his shaky hands and the zoo of creatures in his stomach. He had gotten to Suns and Songs fifteen minutes early with a lavender and daisy bouquet in hand. The restaurant his sister had reserved was nothing short of incredible. Dark maroon draped over each table, and opulent candelabras sat in the center, lit only if the table was occupied. Glass and crystal chandeliers swung slowly from the high wooden beams, catching on the light and making a kaleidoscope of the room. Even the way the air smelt was decadent here. Like wood smoke and perfume, some hint of chocolate, maybe. He couldn’t quite put his finger on it, but he wanted to bottle the scent and bathe himself in it. Trying not to be suspicious he took another deep breath in; it calmed his nerves if nothing else.

“Mr Grace?” someone put a soft hand on his shoulder, “Your guest,”

He thanked the waitress, getting up to greet his date and pull out her chair. He tried to muffle his gasp when he finally turned to her. She was stunning. Midnight skin contrasting elegantly with the pastel yellow dress she wore. Braids intertwined with glittering strands; it cast a pale silver halo around her head. Small hoop earrings glinted as she moved, and the bracelets at her wrist clinked gently when they shook hands.

“Hi, Jason Grace,” He smiled.

“Zoe Nightshade.” She flashed beautiful white teeth.

He handed her the flowers, “You look unbelievable.” He truly was in awe of her.

“Thank you,” Her smile was soft, but her voice was crisp and direct, “And these are gorgeous.”

“Would you like to order drinks?”

They scanned the menu quickly; Zoe ordered a cocktail he hadn’t heard of and he ordered the first thing he saw that didn’t have tequila in it.

“So,” He asked, and then cringed at himself internally. Starting any conversation with so was bound to make it awkward.

He cleared his throat, “How do you know Thalia?”

“We work together at the Conservatory. I moved here a couple months ago because I got transferred from the wildlife center in Germany.”

Jason didn’t know what but something about her voice made his insides melt. She said everything so undiplomatically– like if it wasn’t a fact it wasn’t worth uttering.

“Oh that’s cool. What do you do?”

“I’m a veterinarian. You?”

“Well I was a structural engineer but somehow over the years I got roped into being a town and regional planner.”

She frowned, tilting her head assessingly, “You did not finish your engineering degree?”

“Oh no I finished and got my masters in structural but then I started my company and I realised I needed other qualifications to run it the way I wanted to so I had to go back and get a degree in urban and regional planning. By the end I felt like I had been studying since the dawn of time.”

She laughed at that, and a look of surprise crossed her face, as if it was as unexpected to her as it was to him. “I know how you feel. I love animals and I’m passionate about my work but when I was done studying, I vowed never to go back. Studying for seven years after school and then trying to do it all over again feels like a one-way ticket to the end of the road.”

He mirrored her smile, “How did you get into veterinary sciences anyway?”

“My father was always busy, and my sisters were… interested in anything that could make them more beautiful, or richer. So I was pretty alone for most of my childhood. At some stage I convinced my father to get me a dog, Ladon. We were inseparable. But he got hurt when this man,“ She said it with such disgust he almost flinched. “This man hurt him. Kicked Little Ladon out the way when he was just trying to say hello. We had to take him to the vet, and I remember them being so sweet and kind to my dog and I knew I wanted to be exactly like that when I grew up.”

“Any chance you know where this man is so we can kick his ass?”

She laughed, raspy and bursting, “Don’t worry little eleven-year-old me kicked Mr Alcides as hard as I could in the shins.”

“Good,” he nodded with conviction, “He deserved more but you found your passion so there is some balance.”

She hid her grin behind a sip from her drink.

“Sir, ma’am,” Their waitress stepped to their table, “Would you like to order?”

Hours later, cheeks flushed from the liquor, laughing over Thalia’s antics and their shared need for structure, they finally decided to call the dinner to an end.

“The focaccia was to die for,” Zoe groaned, patting her stomach.

“Honestly, I may have to marry the pasta.” He sighed contentedly.

She giggled, and he knew it was a rare thing for her because her face caught that surprised look again.

“Want to grab dessert?”

“Oh gods no,” She shook her head in alarm, and then frowned as the realisation of what that meant washed through her.

“I had a really great time tonight,” He started softly.

“Do you want to walk to the park? We can stop and have gelato?” Her dark eyes were full of nervous hope.

He blinked at her, a little shocked she wanted to continue the date, “I thought you didn’t want dessert?” He teased.

“Maybe the walk will burn off some of these calories and i’ll have space for a little ice-cream.” She scunched her nose.

He knew the gelato was just an excuse, so with a grin that lit up his whole face he grabbed her hand and nodded, “Let’s do it Miss Nightshade.”

Her face glowed with relief and enthusiasm as they tucked their chairs in and exited the restaurant.

“Tell me about your family. How come you weren’t interested in the rich side of life like your sisters?”

“I guess being the youngest kind of made it all seem pointless. I had seen what happened when their vanity became malicious and I didn’t ever want to turn into something I couldn’t recognise. I went to stay with my Aunt Diana through high school. She owned a bird sanctuary. That’s where I interned in my college years.”

“Wow,” He looked down to her, awe evident in his face, “And it didn’t bother you to be so far away from your father and sisters?”

“Honestly, I’m not even sure they noticed when I left.” She shrugged, “It was a long time ago. I really only see them for family functions now.”

“And your aunt?”

“She still has the bird sanctuary, but she mostly works in the background now. My cousins, Bianca and Phoebe, run it full time.”

“Do you miss it? Were you guys close?”

“Much closer than my sisters and I. I do miss them, but I definitely can’t say I miss the sanctuary. Some of those birds were evil.”

Just then a loud squawk came from above them. She scowled at the sky, “I’m talking about you Auretta.”

He tried to hold in a laugh but Zoe stuck out her tongue childishly and they both bent over in laughter.

“Maybe we shouldn’t hurl insults while we’re out in the open.” He managed to gasp.

“Good thing the gelato shop is right there.” She grinned, grabbing his hand and sprinting towards the small, illuminated store at the end of the cobbled street. Her dress shimmered, moved like rays of light. She looked like a star.

“Come on,” She yelled, tugging at his hand harder.

‘Alright, alright,” He snapped out of his admiration and let her lead him into the shop.

“Hi, what can I get you?”

“Want to share?”

“Sure, you choose,” He waved a hand towards the abundance of flavours behind the glass.

“Please can we have one scoop of chocolate, one scoop of vanilla and,” Her brow furrowed as she scanned the tags, “And one scoop of cookie crumble.”

“Why did I think you were a sorbet girl?”

“Sorbet in the summer, anything else for the rest of the year.” She said matter of factly.

He nodded solemnly, “Yes makes sense.”

She swatted his arm, grabbing the cone from the lady with a thank you, “Gods I feel like a teenager again,”

“I know what you mean,” Her excitement was infectious.

“I have to ask,” She swallowed a chunk of cookie crumble, “What on earth were you thinking when you decided to eat a stapler?”

Jason groaned, “Why did Thalia tell you that? She swore she wouldn’t tell anyone and if asked I would say I fell off my bike or something.”

Zoe giggled, “Come on, spill.”

“Okay, first of all I was two,” He sighed, embarrassment heating his cheeks, “And it was shiny, and it made a cool clicking noise, and I wanted to know what it tasted like.”

“I can just picture a little Jason crawling onto the kitchen counter and trying to bite down on a stapler.” She teased.

“Yes well now I have this scar,” He pointed to his upper lip, rolling his eyes.

“Battle scars. Very worthy.”

He shoved at her shoulder lightly and they dissolved into laughter once more.

It was almost midnight by the time he had dropped her off at home and stepped into his apartment. He looked at his phone to see a couple work messages, and something from Hazel– things he could reply to in the morning he decided, tugging off his tie and discarding his clothes as he walked to his room. He was asleep before his head hit the pillow, his phone still glaringly bright and open on the chat with his sister.

You were right. We’re going on a second date.

-----------------------------------------------------

Grover is like some other worldy deity that spews life lessons every time they meet and i am so here for it! Anyway what y’all saying??? How are we feeling?

Tags (if you want to be added to/ taken off the tag list just let me know, all my channels of communication are open):

@lesbian-peanuts

@leydiangelo

@queen-of-demons-and-hell

@msdrpreist

@sparkythunderstorm

@nishlicious-01

@lucyisblue

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dark-and-kawaii · 5 years ago

Note

Kiwiiii =_= ive been waiting to see if you ever write for any of the kuroko boys again and here we are. As Kiyoshi Senpai would say, let's all have some fun! How would our bad boys feel when their fem s/o asks to do their makeup 🐞

Awh, I’ve honestly missed writing for my basketball babes (^w^)

EHEHE!!! Kiyoshi is right! Let’s all have some fun, yeah??? This request is making me feel so many things since I myself am a makeup artist!!! Thank you so much for sending this in love bug!!!

Yamazaki:

Bless his heart, because this boy is the absolute best.

Kicking open his bedroom door -makeup pallets in hand- your eyes are practically glowing with so much passion as you run towards him. “Yams!!! Look!! Look!!!” Pressing your pallets against his face he already knows the next thing you’re about to say… “I just got some new pallets!!” -twirling around your skirt lifts ever so slightly and our sweet bad boy is smiling with how cute you are with all your excitement.- “I already have makeup on…. ~sooooo could i please use your face as my canvas?!”

Yamazaki will of course say yes. He’s mainly curious to see what you can pull off and he’s never had makeup on before so he’s also curious as to how it feels….

Will sit as still as he possibly can but his nerves kick in and his knee begins to bounce around which isn’t the best for you since you’re trying to do his mascara…

You definitely end up poking him in the eye with mascara since he won’t stop bouncing his knee.. And when you try to reapply it he leans back every time while squinting at you… It’ll take years for him to ever trust such a product again, especially in your hands…

Will sit and make kissy faces at you when you apply the lipstick / cracks jokes about how the team would be gay for him.

When the process is all over and you’ve finished his makeup, Yamazaki can see how sad you look since you were having so much fun with him and he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t enjoying this time with you as well… Picking up one of the pallets you seemed most interested in, Yamazaki will stand from where he was sitting and tell you to sit down. “I want to try doing your makeup, ___.”

Yamazaki will gently wipe off the makeup you had on previously and once its all wiped off he will then attempt to apply makeup to your face….

Just as you did to him… He did to you with the mascara… You and Yamz will never trust one another with mascara ever again.

Hara:

Hara just pops his gum as you sit in front of him silently wide eyed awaiting his reply… He pops another bubble… And you can’t take it anymore. “So!? What’s the answer Hara? Will you let me play with my new makeup with you or not?? It should be at my place by now and i really think it would be fun for us!”

Hara makes an annoyed sound as he pops yet another bubble, “Sure, but only if you give me a blow job after.” You can hardly believe it…. that’s a lie… you can believe he would say something like that…. With disgust written all over your face you get up from your desk and begin to storm out while harshly saying, “FINE! I’ll find someone else!! Someone who doesn’t need or want anything in return except fun memories!”

It takes only 2 minutes before Hara is sitting up from his very own desk going after you. Maybe that was a bit too harsh, you’re always doing for him and unlike his previous girls he wants to keep you around.

Eventually finds you on your front steps holding your new Jeffree Star lipsticks and pallet. Taking one of the lipsticks out of your hand he opens it and applies it best he can before pressing his lips together making a popping noise. Smiling at you he pulls back his bangs from his face and asks you if you can help make him a pretty girl.

Turns out to be a fun night with Hara. Applying makeup to him is easy thanks to his smooth skin and him being patient with you.

Asks if he’s getting anything in returned like sex or a BJ, you just smack him upside the head though.

Hara surprisingly likes the feeling of eyeshadow being applied to his eyes, your brush is extremely soft and the smooth swiping motions on his eyes is quite calming. Will ask you questions about what does what and what the purpose is… It’s not that he cares it’s just he really wants to make up for how he acts at times -lowkey hopes it scores him points with you-.

Once his makeup is complete he will tell you to stay in the bathroom as he goes into your room and raids your panty drawer. No no no. It’s not what you think. Once he’s done doing what he wanted, he will come back to your bathroom and there standing before you is one tall ass basketball player wearing your V-string and sport bra… Popping his gum Hara smirks at you, “Mommy is ready for her punishment daddy ____.”

Hara is cringe.

Seto:

Seto is so chill my god.

At first Seto isn’t the biggest fan of the idea and he does tell you no the first two times you ask. However as you lay on his chest looking up at him with teary eyes begging him to let you apply makeup to him he can’t help but smirk. “Someone’s quite persistent, aren’t they?” Placing his hand atop your head he tousles your hair and says fine, but only if he can sleep through most of it.

Sitting up on his chest you peck his nose and agree to this! Most of the makeup can be applied with his eyes shut and it’ll be easier to apply the eyeshadow! “Thank you Seto! I will even hide that mole of your forehead since you hate it so much!!!” You say with one of the sweetest tones he’s ever heard.

It’s honestly a win win for the both of you. 1st you’re getting to put makeup on your very tough looking boyfriend who is deemed a bad boy in your school. 2nd He loves the feeling of you straddling his chest as you apply the makeup and he’s gotta admit… the powder brush feels pretty damn great.

Once you’re all finished you hand him your glittery mirror and say “BOOM THATS THE POWER OF MAKEUP BABY!!!” His mole is concealed and the pink eyeshadow you applied pops thanks to his darker skin…. His eyes are wide with a bit of concern, he’s heard horror stories of neon shadow staining eyelids…. which guess what… it did…. And the next day he’s going to school with pink eyes and the guys all laugh. However, Seto shrugs it off. It made you happy and that’s what’s important.

Furuhashi:

Staring out his bedroom window you watched as the rain continued to tap against his window. Between the roaring thunder, Furuhashi’s soft voice, and dark sky, you were slowly starting to doze off… Until your elbow was harshly nudged by another. Furuhashi was gazing at you with his iconic dead fish eyes… He had been trying to help you study but he just couldn’t keep you focused long enough, “____, if you don’t want to study why did you ask?”

It’s not like you didn’t want to study, honestly. You were falling behind in your language class and he was the best person to ask… and also the only person he’d be okay with you asking since deep down Furuhashi was a bit possessive… Poking his cheek softly with your sanrio pen you asked in your most angelic voice, “~Ko, could i please apply my makeup to your handsome face? It would help wake me up and change the mood in the room.” Adding the puppy pout you looked so pathetic, it made him want to hurt you…

With a great big sigh, Furuhashi finally caved. He hated makeup being on his face and this wasn’t his first rodeo which is exactly why he always gave you a blank stare and walked away when you asked in the past. His young sister has done this to him in the past and he absolutely hates the way it feels on his face, not only that but it gives him anxiety.

Doesn’t look thrilled 90% of the time you’re applying your makeup on him. Will look curiously at certain products and arch his eyebrow at you as you dip your brush into the odd looking product in your hand. Asks questions and will grab your wrists when he sees a color he isn’t too fond about -reminds him of the time his younger sister did it and it stained-.

Will smile ever so gently at you when you’re turned around reaching for a new product as you ramble on about how it works better than the other brands. Furuhashi actually finds you quite adorable at the moment, he’s amazed you’re so passionate about makeup. And as he turns around to look in the mirror -with you still turned around- he’s even more amazed at just how talented you are at it. It makes him want to continue to protect you so you can accomplish your beauty dreams without any interference, though he’ll never admit that openly to you.

Hanamiya:

Hanamiya has never been so damn annoyed or tired in his entire life, and he’s been through quite the irritating situations before. However as you continue day in and day out asking him… no, scratch that… begging him if you can put makeup on his pasty face his eyes grow more tired and exasperated.

Eventually snaps on you and makes you cry by calling you an annoyance and that you’ve been nothing but a pest the past week. Give it about an hour though, deep down he knows he messed up and with a click of his tongue he’s off to find you.

“Hanamiya! I challenge you to a basketball game!!” With unstable quivering legs, you stood as tall as you can as you throw the basketball at the back of Hanamiya’s head…. Ah yes, this is why he loved you and kept you around, not only were you always pulling dumb stunts around him but you also tried to act as if you weren’t afraid of the consequences. Turning around with a devilish smirk, hanamiya replied to you as he picks up the orange sport ball, “Oh? And what might my little ____ want if she wins?” He knew you didn’t have a chance but this was too much fun seeing you have so much hope just so he could take it away.

“I-If i w-win I get to ap-apply my makeup to you… I- I-” Looking down with sullen eyes your voice became low and Hanamiya could hear the deep dejection in it… “I’m just really nervous because this Salon got ahold of me and asked if i could come in a show them my skills… Th-that they are interested in having me there with them… but i wanted to practice on an actual person… i- This was dumb, gomen’nasai Makoto…”

Before you could even walk away the basketball had made contact with the back of your head this time. Twirling around holding the back of your head you saw that Hanamiya’s eyes were concealed with his jet black hair but his signature grin was fully on display, “Oi oi, who said you could walk away from me? Let’s play.”

It took a solid two hours but you finally managed to beat Hanamiya… Not that you won by pure skills or anything, Hanamiya had let you win.

Applying his makeup actually ends up being more fun than you thought it would be, though there were a lot of times where he was making it difficult for you -surprise-. Hanamiya will “accidentally” knock a brush out of your hands here and there along with blowing the eyeshadow right off your shadow brush. You don’t know what overcame you but in the heat of the moment you decided to just dump your loose glitter all over his head since he wouldn’t stop acting out, and with a booming laugh you hold your stomach as you die from pure joy after seeing his face.

The atmosphere in your bathroom has changed drastically and his presence is menacing… “Ha-Hanamiya… i- I-im so sorry i just.. I thought it wou-”

Grabbing you by your throat Hanamiya pins you against the sink as his mouth gets dangerously close to your ear. You can feel his hot breath as he whispers in your ear, “I think it’s time you learned your place, pet.” You’re frightened and unaware of what to do until you feel loose face powder his your face, “BAAAAKA!” Sticking his tongue out at you Hanamiya proceeds to coat your face with loose powder.

#KNB #kuroko no basket #hanamiya makoto #seto kentaro #furuhashi kojiro #hara kazuya #yamazaki hiroshi #Kirisaki Daiichi #kirisaki dai ichi #kurokos basketball

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riskeith · 4 years ago

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hehe, hi!! hope you slept well even if you stayed up until 3-4 am (?) also what fic... what paring... 👀

genshin charas be like: *wavy beautiful flowy deep hair* tbh and we just gotta accept that. just keep practicing and i’m sure you’ll do them more than justice. your stuff is already great so far!! I JUST SAW HIS ISLE ANIMATION RAZOR IS LITERALLY BEST BOY? also his voice actor... ☹️🥺 razor is catboy we love it.

i’m gonna run around with him and just think about you always i promise!!!! [as if i don’t do that already hehe 😏] some day it will be i’m actually hopefully they’ll do it. too many people want cross server they cannot pass that up.. :(

thank u!! hehe, it’s a tododeku piece and it was one of my first bnha fics i started working on. basically it’s a radio au? i love those so much... midoriya’s a radio host and todoroki listens to him to help his insomnia and they start talking and it’s basically Yearning... jshdjdhdkd this one is actually one of those fics ive always wanted to do but felt stuck with multiple times shdjdsshdh but i don’t wanna let it die just yet so we’ll see what i’ll do with it. and yeah!!! long fics are super intimidating. i agree with everything you said lmao. the stuff i post is actually only one shots. multi-cap scares the fuck out of me bc what if you just lose motivation and then there are people that are waiting for updates and aaah. when i used to do longer fics i used to write it all out before posting the chapters that way i was Sure it was all done. most of my longer fics just end up never leaving my drive account because of that reason.. i literally have fics with over 20k words that have just died out... yikes. hahahah. and omg imagine a wip dump i’d read them all!! who knows what gold your big brain has hidden from us....

YOU HAVE A STUDY? now that’s just sexy of you. stop i feel like people that study at home in a specific office are studious. there’s something super fancy about having a work space at home... and a bookshelf my god what a dream... 😍 books are the most important!!!!! my makeup is hidden in a makeup bag so it doesn’t touch them. i’d literally cry if anything happened to any of them shsjdjk. your bookshelf said 2013 vibes and i adore it. all of those are such good vibes tbh i can’t believe you have them at home... awww <3 do you like the movie adaptions as well?

what happens after 12 yo? do you have secondary school?

I HAVE NO CLUE... god albedo so gorgeous. we’ve just been praising him for days and i’m still not tired of him. he’s so perfect!!!!! if he comes back another time i’m definitely gonna go for it. also AHH? i cant wait for the razor pic aaah you made me so excited now... <3

i made a asia server acc earlier!! god it feels so weird to start anew sjdkdhdk all the tutorials.. not having wings... nothing. just paimon and me running around in the whispering woods. kind of tedious actually but gotta do it for the wifey.. 🥰 i’m thinking i’m gonna hustle hard this weekend to hopefully get up at least to level 10 or something. omg we are literally gonna be that meme where the short person stands in front of taller person and says “they asked for no pickles”... have you seen them? i suck at explaining shjdjdjd anyway. CANT WAIT TO SEE YOU PLAY... 😍 the homoerotic tension in the domains... 😍 also i was thinking,. we get a lot of primogems early in the game and i’m gonna try to spin for xingqiu so we can have that date after all... 😏

YOU HAVE 5 ACCS? my girl is booked and busy. can i ask what for help... also do you ever tweet the wrong things on the wrong accs? and idk what a moment is but i’d absolutely watch that. i wanna see ur cute screenshots... 🥺 YOUR THEME IS SOOOOOO FUCKING GOOD!!!!! ohdhsjshsjshsjsj it’s soooo fucking nice I LOVE IT the colors and the pose. THE MOON ABOVE HIS HEAD. mark me as in love... 🥺

it’s me who cannot wait to hear from YOU. i can’t stop thinking about how soon we’ll run around together aaaah... <3333

i finished responding to your ask at like 3am and slept then!! it was.... drarry 😳😳 they’re legitimately all i read these days even tho i have like one (1) knowledge about hp and its lore FHDKFHSDFJSDKKHSD just the enemies to lovers dynamic you know??? ugh 😩😘👌

fjksdfh thank!! HE’S THE BESTEST BOY!! lil pup 🥺🥺 AND HERE’S THE IMAGE:

LOOK AT HIM M.A. LOOK!!!!!!!!!!! dont you just want to give him everything <333 all the wolfhook he wants... all the good pats... 😭😭😭😭

hehe <33 and hopefully some day!!! i think realistically they wouldn’t, but one can hope hfsdkfhkdsjkh

:o concept! oooo does todoroki know it’s midoriya or is he just pining for the mystery radio show host 😩🤪 i hope you’re able to keep it alive! ahaha ganbatte plus ultra 💪💪💪 you 🤝 me sticking to one-shots. fjdslfkj damn writing it ALL before posting tho requires so much patience... that’s so admirable.... im legit so hungry for like attention and validation from my fics i can’t not post fhdsfsdhsdhk even if it’s still a wip... and the giving up on a multichap i’ve done that LOLLLLLLLLLL i was so in denial about it too even tho i knew i was never gonna go back to it i went from pretending it didnt exist to announcing a hiatus to then announcing its discontinuation fhdskfjsdkjfskdhfdsks

FHSKFHSDKJ ye!! ahah actually now that you say it like that ... makes me sound so profesh 😩 nice! that’s good protect the books first and foremost hfksdhkfs. 2013 was a vibe too i reckon.. that was when catching fire came out <333 which relates to your question, i do *mostly* like the movie adaptations! if i watch the movies before the books then it’s all good, but if i’ve already read the books and then i go into the adaptation..... yikes HSHAH but sometimes it’s been so long i forget the book plot so it’s alright. i do think the hunger games adaptations were really good though!!! hbu do you like the movies?

yup we call it high school!! and that goes from 13-18 yo.

albedo... always on the mind 🥰🥰🥰 i think once i get xiao i might maybe roll of every banner after? just to try LOL idkk.

!! im so sorry you have to go through all that tedious stuff again 😭😭😭 but im so thankful 😍😍😍😍 once you reach co-op levels dw we can do all the quests together so you won’t have to suffer through them with difficulty 🤪 and no i didn’t know that meme but i just looked it up and omg that energy... can’t wait for that to be us :p XINGQIU!!! im so excited omg.. that was one of the other reasons i was willing to start again so i could try roll him fshfksjd. channeling luck for you so you get him again!!! and then chongyun can be with the boyf <33

5 but only 3 i use!!! my kpop twt, anime, and then my ‘main’ (for posting just fics and art etc). the other 2 are basically just there to save URLs hfskdfhskd. and no i don’t!! im super conscientious about that bc im so paranoid hfkshfsdfhsdfjksdhfks y’all won’t catch me slipping 🤪 and a moment is basically just a collection of tweets! but i realised you actually need to tweet them first for that to happen fshfhsdkfd but here are some thumbnails!

THANK UUUU chongyun really is my muse.. who needs irl photography when i can do all this in game <33333

ME NEITHER!! you got me smiling like a fool just thinking about it... hope you slept well! mwah :*

#marriage anon #wowclunaanswers #long post

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shannygoatgruff · 5 years ago

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My Brother’s Keeper - Chapter IX

Genre: Psychological Thriller

Modern Ivar X Modern Hvitserk

Rating: MA

Overall Warning: Dark story told from an emotionally distributed person’s POV with graphic and sadistic material including rape, terror, torture, kidnapping, drug use, slash, implied incest, necrophilia, and insecurity. Heavy trigger warnings.

Chapter Warning: Drug use, talk of spiraling out of control

Summary: Mama always said to be their brothers’ keeper. Now there is absolutely nothing these two won’t do for each other. Boys will be boys…

Chapter IX

Why the fuck am I watching the news? This is what flipping through channels gets me. I should have never stopped when I saw this bitch’s face. I fucking hate her.

Now, I either want to put my fist through the TV or pull my damn hair out.

Fuck, I hate this bitch! She’s no different from the rest of these news assholes. Always trying to dig up some shit that should be left alone. Putting all of our personal business on blast like that...pieces of shit. And this whore is the worst of them. She's purposely trying to make Ivar and I look bad.

"Police are trying to find a common thread between these murders. The victims have all been found in remote areas throughout the county. The coroner reports each victim showed signs of sexual trauma and or torture, pre- or post-mortem. While police have no suspects, in these killings, they do believe they are all connected and have been committed by the same perpetrator. Witnesses to the last two victims’ disappearances have described seeing a Caucasian male, between the ages of 18-35, approximately 5’8” – 6’2”, medium build, with medium to dark hair, leaving with the victims. If you have any information about these victims or the suspect, please call Detective Torstein, Homicide." The white numbers for the police station flash on the screen under this bitch’s face.

“You fucking cunt!” I don’t know what just fell to the floor as I kicked the coffee table in front of the couch. She has no right to show fucking pictures and the names of our past guests. But, I’ll be damned, if they are there. All the ones from this month: Halfdan, Porunn, Astrid, and Erlendur. None of them looked like that when we met them. Then, they were all slutted up and ready to please. But looking at these pictures, they look like they’re a part of a fucking church choir.

You bitch!

But, fuck you news-lady, you forgot one. You forgot about that girl we met at the concert. I almost did. At least, I can keep one of those special nights sacred without you fucking it all up and turning it into some freak show for these news groupies to salivate over.

Shit, I just wish I could remember that whole night.

I can only remember meeting her and bringing her back to the cabin. I remember she was a great lay, and that looked fucking amazing. But that’s it. Every time I try to remember what we did, or how many times we did it or anything else, there’s like a blank spot. I don’t know if Ivar got to try anything new with her, or what.

Ivar said I blacked out, again. Did she pass out before or after he got to her? Did she try to escape? Did he punish her long and hard for that? Did she cooperate and he let her go? Is that why she wasn’t on this little photo lineup? What the fuck I am saying? He wouldn’t’ve done that shit. They just haven't found her body, yet.

That bitch reporter is smiling again. She's enjoying all the fucking lies and the smear campaign that she’s creating against us. "Stay tuned for more information on these murders as they become available. Judith Wessex, reporting, Action 10 News."

"Lying bitch!" Just the look on her face and the sound of her voice is driving me crazy. She doesn't know us. She has no right to say those kinds of things about us. Nobody tortured or brutalized anybody. It was all in fun. They were into it.

Ivar takes the remote from my hand and tucks it into his palm, "You don't need to watch this." He's been extra protective since I woke up in his bed. I can't do anything. He must have really been scared after this last blackout because he won't let anything upset me. Changing the channel, he settles on something non-threatening; Property Brothers. He knows I love that show. "There. That's better."

"I'm fine, Ivar,” I lie, “that bitch on the news just got under my skin.” I reach over to pick up the ashtray – when did I start smoking so much? I’m already on my second pack today and I’ve only been awake since noon.

"I know you are. But you get bothered so easily. I just want you to take it easy." His smooth voice caresses my ears and instantly gives me goosebumps on my arms. But he knows the damage is already done. Standing behind me, he holds his arms out on either side of my head, with his fists out in front of me. “Left or right? Pick one.”

I have no idea what’s in his hands, but since we’re both right-handed, I nod toward his right hand. He tilts my head back so I’m looking up at him. “Open up.” I obediently do as I’m told and feel three pills of varying size hit my tongue.

He quickly places a kiss on my forehead as I sit up to swallow the pills dry. Turning in my seat, I watch as he drops the pills from his left hand into his mouth. He holds his tongue out for me to see his four pills before his tongue darts back into his mouth.

“What was that?” I try to swallow hard enough to make the pills slide down my throat. Hopefully, it’s something that’ll make me stop wanting to throw this fucking television out of the window.

Ivar shrugs and smiles, “Fuck if I know. I found them in my coat pocket. Guess we’ll find out shortly.” He picks up the dishtowel that he had sat down on the back of the couch and slings it over his shoulder, "Anyway, Serk, that shit that reporter said wasn't true. She's just trying to fuck with us. Trying to make us slip up." He starts to walk out of the room but stops and turns around with a huge smile. "Maybe we should party with her." His smile immediately fades when he sees how upset she's made me. "Awe, brother… don't worry about that bitch. I'll kill her if you want."

"They know what we look like, Ives."

"How many white guys are there in the world, Serk? They can’t even agree on my goddamn hair color.” He leans against the wall and folds his arms across his chest. “I took care of everything. No one knows. No one will ever find out." There is such honesty and power in his voice that I can’t help but trust that he believes this. I know he wouldn’t chance anything getting in the way of the life that we've built together.

But, there’s still that part of me that fears that our world is about to come crashing down around us. What would I do if I didn’t have this outlet or God forbid they took Ivar away from me?

"I can't handle this shit anymore. Fucking bitch reporters are lying on us. Stupid fucking cops are trying to dig shit up and sticking their pig noses where they don't belong." Everything as of late is running through my mind. This use to be so much fun, but now everyone else is fucking it up. "Something wrong with me. My blackouts are getting worse. We went out and I can't remember it. I can't remember jack shit from the past week! Who the fuck blacks out for a whole week? How long can I go on like this before something really fucked up happens?"

It feels like my throat is closing and I’m starting to sweat. My heart rate is speeding up and I think I’m about to die. I can’t breathe. Jesus, why does Ivar put up with me when I'm like this? "I'm fucking up at work. Fucking Ub is gonna come here and start asking questions. Thora’s gonna fucking leave me. You're gonna get tired of taking care of me! Shit's just all fucked up." I sit forward with my arms on my thighs and try to catch my breath. I try so hard not to give into the fear, but fuck if I'm not feeling it leak out of my pores.

This is why I need Ivar. Thora could never handle me like this. I can't even handle me when I get like this. "I don't know how much more I can take, Ivy. I can't do this shit, no more! I can't." All the air I’m trying to gulp in isn’t helping at the moment.

Standing before me with a concerned look on his face, he shifts his weight from one leg to the other. "Hvitserk Ragnarsson." And there it is - that voice that I fucking hate. That voice Father used to keep us in line. Ivar rarely uses that voice, but when he does it immediately gets my attention. I look at him obediently as he sits on the edge of the couch next to me and studies my face.

The amount of emotion in me is overwhelming and before his hand even reaches up to touch my hair, my throat starts to ache, my head hurts and my eyes are stinging. Shit.

Ivar's arms around me remind me just how much I need him and how important he is to me. "I'm sorry." I lean my head back on the pillow and let the tears run down my face. I’m so embarrassed and tired of always losing my shit. But true to form, his arms are around my neck and he presses his lips to my cheek and coos sweetly in my ear until I feel my fear dissipates.

With a smile on his face, he turns my head to his. "Better now?" His thumbs trace my tears as he holds my head in his hands. The look in his eyes tells me that everything is going to alright and I believe him. A simple nod of my head convinces him that the worst is over and with that, he places the gentlest kiss on the tip of my nose. I don't how he does it, but he always makes it better. "Come on," he takes my hand to pull me off the couch with him, "I baked cookies."

Now I just feel silly. I had another meltdown and truthfully I can't remember why especially when I see the plate of fresh-baked cookies that he has laid out on the kitchen table. Whatever was wrong with me just moments before seems trivial. It's amazing how he just always seems to know what to do to make everything better.

Ivar's back is to me as he looks out of the kitchen window, but judging by the way his neck is arched, he's taken an interest in something. "We have new neighbors." His voice is distant, almost like he's speaking without thinking. He can’t tear his eyes away from whatever is outside, but his head turns the slightest bit to face me.

I’ve never seen him entranced this before. Ivar never fixates. These neighbors must be amazing.

I stuff a chocolate chip cookie into my mouth and pick up another one on my way to the window. He's right. A new young couple is moving in right next door and the woman is exceptionally beautiful. Her eyes are big and bright, her face is like silk and she has this refreshingly innocent look about her. It's enough to remind me that I haven't called Thora since the last night she was here.

Then there's the guy with her. There's something in the proud way he stands... the way his muscles protrude from the sleeves of his t-shirt, and the powerful way in which he slips his arms around her and lifts her off the ground…It makes my top lip sweat and a tingle start at the base of my skull.

I can't move. I can only stand here and chew my cookie as I watch these beautiful creatures in front of me. “They are perfect,” My voice comes out like a dream. I don’t even recognize the sound of it.

As soon as I look over at him and see that gleam in his eye, I know that he already knows. They are perfect.

He lifts my hand to his mouth and takes a bite of the cookie I'm holding. "Yes. They. Are." Chewing, he nods his head and smiles. "We should welcome them to the neighborhood." He always says that the only way to get over the last one is to take a new one. The more I think about it, the more sense it makes.

Something happened with the last girl. Something bad enough to make me forget the most important things. I wish I could remember that night because I want to know that I showed her a good time, but I don't want to remember why I lost control. It's no use worrying about it now. I can't dwell on old memories. I can only look forward to making new ones. New memories with my new neighbors.

No matter what I've done before or how I feel about it now, the only thing I can concentrate on at this very moment is the dull gnawing in my gut. I need something to keep my mind off of all of this shit.

I need this. I need them. I may always be fighting with the half a conscience I have, but the growling inside of me is usually much louder than it.

The beast inside of me is awake again. And it's so damn hungry.

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lilulo-12fanfiction · 5 years ago

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Flicker, Fade- Part 2

It’s finally done! This is Part 2 of a combo of two requests. Word count is 11,800. Soooo not as long as the first part...but long winded none the less.

Original requests: @justkending requested a Steve Rogers x Reader with prompts: “I warned you about him, yet again you didn’t listen.” and “It’s 6am- you’re not having vodka. @asgardiangurll requested a Steve Rogers x Reader with with prompts:”I’m never going to stop protecting you.”“You are seriously like a man child”

There will definitely be a Part 3. I’m not sure if I’ll be going beyond that. It depends on where the next part takes me. I always know where I want to end up, it’s just how long it takes me to get there.

I hope everyone is healthy and doing well. All of this COVID-19 business is crazy. Stay safe friends. ♥️

As always likes, comments and reblogs are SO APPRECIATED. Requests are open (Avengers, Supernatural, TVD/The Originals. I do dabble in some Green Arrow and The Flash (DC TV Only please). Prompt list can be found here.

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Flicker, Fade Part 1

Avengers Masterlist

Avengers Tag List: @shreddedparchment @fanfictionjunkie1112 @this-is-mycrisis @geeksareunique @mikariell95 @gabethelobster @captured-memory

Steve had scooped you up in his arms and ran to the safe house. He had never ran so fast in his life. The heavy rain making it almost impossible for him to see. He was just grateful that it was so warm. As he approached the door, a simple fingerprint scan gave him access to the house. He couldn’t imagine maneuvering a key and the door in that rain while carrying you. He didn’t understand why you couldn’t heal yourself. Once he got you settled on the bed he was calling Tony. He frantically gave him the abridged version of the night’s events.

“Rogers, listen to me and listen carefully. I need you to open the top desk drawers. In there are supplies. Pull out the long cotton swab. You’re going to have to get me a sample of blood from the wound. They must have had something on that blade that would stop her healing, unless throwing the force field drained her, but I don’t think that is the case. If it were that she would experience a fluctuation in her powers any time she used them. There are glass slides in that same drawer. Swab the blood on that and then you’re going to stick it in that little machine that is on the far left end of the desk. It will transmit the results to me here.“

“Oh- okay.” Steve stuttered. It always amazed him how advanced Tony’s technology was and how smart he was. Tony and Bruce consistently blew him away. He and Bruce were a power house.

“I have activated the camera that is there. Put me on speaker phone, I can see you.” Steve set the phone down after he put it on speaker and got to work. “Steve you’re going to have to cut her dress so you can get to her stomach. And don’t be a fumbling idiot. I know you’re all shy and gentleman like, but this is survival.” Steve found a pair of scissors and cut away the dress near the stab wound. He had never been more thankful for the spandex shorts you had put on under that dress. You had been prepared for a fight. You were always ready for a fight. He worked quickly to get your blood sample over to Tony. “Okay, now you need to clean it like we normally would. Once it’s clean, in the fridge there are pre-filled syringes. It’s an antibiotic. Inject it near the site of the stab wound. Then stitch her up.” The bleeding had finally slowed. The dried blood caked to your dress and abdomen was substantial. Steve’s hands shook as he worked.

“Tony how long until you can get us out of here? She’s burning up.” Your whole body felt like it was on fire. Steve couldn’t look at your face. He wouldn’t be able to focus if he did. He pinched the skin on your stomach to inject the antibiotic.

“What the hell did those assholes give her? That’s a quick acting infection unless maybe it’s just because of how hot it is there. The humidity has to be abrasive.” Steve knew Tony was nervous by how he was rambling. “I don’t know when we can get there Cap. Nothing is going in or out. The storm is even affecting us in New York. I have her blood sample now. Give me a little bit. Just hang tight.”

Steve took his time slowly stitching your stomach, hoping to not leave you with a nasty scar. He was slightly impressed with his work, though it wasn’t nearly as good as Bruce’s stitching. It seemed like a century passed from when Steve started stitching you up to when he finally heard from Tony again.

"She's going to be okay. Whatever Cobb developed is slowing down her healing ability, but didn’t eliminate it. I think she’s so warm because her body is working over time to try and heal itself. He didn’t want her dead. I have a feeling he wanted her to experiment with her healing abilities. I wish I had know Cobb was connected to Dr. Yablowski. I never would have let her go on this mission.” Steve had been pressing a cold wash cloth to your forehead. The humidity was almost unbearable.

“I should have done better. I should have protected her, instead she was protecting me. Even when she was bleeding out she shots that bastard in the head.” Tony hummed.

“She does have incredible aim. This is NOT your fault. So get out of your head and focus on taking care of her. That’s how you repay her. You keep her alive. Keep her as cool as you can. Whatever was on that blade is causing an infection essentially. She needs and IV but there’s no way you’re going to be able to do that. Once she comes to, get her hydrated. Probably wouldn’t hurt to give her some pain meds. There are two different kinds where the medications are. Give her a torodol and then the morphine.”

"I’m just worried about Cobb’s men finding the safe house. I'm sure the storm has slowed them down, I don't know if they found that Nick guy yet. But when they do, they'll come looking for us."

"They won’t be able to find you. I equipped our safe houses with the same stealth technology I put on the Quinjet. She'll be okay Steve. She's tough." "I know she is. Tony...Cobb isn’t dealing drugs or with illegal fire arms. It’s something bigger than that.”

"I know. I’m guessing it’s biochemical. I have a feeling he’s made more serums like the one she’s been injected with. I also think she isn’t the only one out there. I think she’s the only one that got away. She was the first one they injected. The doctor that let her go made a HUGE mistake. I found her when she was hiding out. Maybe if I didn’t bring her into they wouldn’t have found her“

“Now who’s blaming themselves?” Tony chuckled.

“I’ll check back in if I don’t hear from you soon. Take care of my girl.” Then the line went dead. Steve finally studied your face. The color had drained from it completely. He got up to get the meds Tony told him to give you and one of his T-Shirts. After he gave you the meds he slipped the shirt over your head and gently pulled your arms through. Once you were covered he slid his hands underneath your back and undid the back of what used to be your dress. He slowly slid it off of you to not disturb the wound. There was so much dried blood on it, the top part of the dress was stiff. He threw it out and got a fresh cool compress to put on your forehead. All he could do now was watch and wait.It had been a few hours since Steve had talked to Tony. The storm wasn’t letting up. He was going absolutely stir crazy. He was keeping an eye on the wound and it seemed to be healing incredibly slow. He had taken to pacing the room, worried that Cobb and his associates would come and he would be outnumbered and it would be easy for them to surround the safe house. He was standing by the back door, looking out at the storm when he heard you groan.

"Steve?" your hoarse voice came out almost as a whisper. He rushed over to you to help pull you up so you could lean against the headboard.

"Cami...Jesus....how do you feel?"

"Like I took a giant blade to the gut." You groaned. You slowly pulled the hem of his t-shirt up to look at your stomach. "You do this hack job?" When he looked up at you, you had a tiny hint of a smile in your eyes.

"Shut up." He laughed.

"Nick?" was all you asked.

"Dead. Bucky is going to be proud."

"Do we know what the hell happened?"

"As far as Tony can tell...there was something on that blade made just for you. It slowed down your healing abilities. He seems to think Cobb wanted to get his hands on you to experiment different substances that would stop your healing completely." He gauged your reaction, which there wasn't much of one, so he continued. "He also thinks that he's making serums, similar to the one that he gave you and selling them on the black market." That caught your attention. You started to move to get out of the bed. "Cami...no, stay."

"I need to stand, just help me up." He slowly pulled you to your feet and you were hunched over slightly and made it to the desk chair. You had eyed your purse on the desk, you grabbed your phone out of the purse and dialed.

"Cam?!" Tony's voice rang out over the speaker.

"Yeah...I'm still kicking."

"Oh Thank God. Listen-"

"No, you listen. You need to get on Martin Cobb and whatever his operation is ASAP. I overheard him and his goon talking. They said I was the first. There has to be more. More like me or with different abilities. We can't let this slip. From what Nick said, he is looking for people circling the drain. If the serum he gives them makes them live, then great. But if it doesn't, or actually kills them instead of their injuries...then well no one will really dig deeper into the cause of death."

"We're already on it. Right now, you need to rest until we can get you out of there."

"I'm fine. I'll be fine. I just want to get this guy. If he has a network of enhanced individuals this could be a disaster. I was smart enough to run, but if he got his hooks into the others...God only knows what he's planning."

"I promise you, we're going to get him. Okay? Now please, go lay down until we can get you out of there."

"Okay, okay. I will."

"Cam?"

"Yeah Tony?"

"I love you kid. I don't know what hell Pepper and I would do if something happened to you." The emotion in his throat was thick.

"Me too Tony. I'll see you soon." You ended the call and wiped your eyes. You felt Steve's hand on your waist. You leaned into the comfort of his touch.

"C'mon...come sit back down." You let him lead you over to the bed and get you settled. He sat down and you could tell he wanted to ask you something, he had that look in his eyes.

"Just ask."

"He called you Y/N Y/L/N."

"That's not really a questions.” You teased. "That was my name...before all of this happened. When I woke up in that hospital...and nothing hurt. And I looked completely different I knew someone did something to me. So I kept my mouth shut and got out of there as fast as I could. When I got home, I found out that Dr. Yablowski was looking for me. So I had to disappear. I buried my family...my baby sister...and I faked my own death and ran. I changed my name, I changed everything about myself. It wasn't easy and it cost me a ton of money, but I did it. I flew under the radar until that gunman. The little girl I saved...she reminded me so much of my sister. Her innocent laugh, her excitement. Same hair, same color eyes. I swear, if reincarnation is a thing, that was my sister reborn. I didn't know that I could create force fields. I never had been exposed to any sort of threat that would require it, until that day. I was getting ready to run, to find a way to start over again, to hopefully hide. I knew if anyone saw, if the news caught it, they would find me. Tony found me and gave me a fresh start. But Cobb and Yablowski knew it was me once they started seeing me on TV with you guys. He's been working on this plan for a while." The sadness in your voice broke Steve's heart. You wouldn't look at him while you were talking about your sister.

"Should we call you Y/N?" Steve asked. Now that the cat was out of the bag, you didn't need a new identity anymore.

"No. Y/N Y/L/N died 5 years ago. If they hadn't injected me, I probably would be dead. I'm not that person anymore. I can't be that person anymore. You and Tony are the only ones that know my former name."

"Not even Bucky?"

"No. Not even him." You sighed. "Steve...you should get some rest."

"No...you're compromised and they could find us."

"They're not going to storm our castle Steve. It's not his style. Just sleep a little. There's no way they're even out looking for us in this weather. If it starts to ease up, I'll wake you. I promise." Steve could feel the exhaustion hitting him like a freight train. He climbed into the bed next to you.

"You sense anything, you wake me up, okay?" You nodded. As he settled into the bed he felt you absentmindedly run your fingers through his hair. He looked up at you, but you were staring ahead, a million miles away. He felt the sleep slowly taking over him. His last thought was how he was going to find Martin Cobb for you if it was the last thing he did.It was late in the morning the next day when the Quinjet landed to bring you and Steve home. Steve had gotten some solid sleep, you had stayed awake the rest of the night. You couldn't sleep. Your brain would not shut off to allow you to rest. You were still incredibly sore but you were improving. Whatever Cobb had created to put on that blade was strong, your resolve was stronger.

***

"CAM!" Bucky rushed to you as soon as you stepped onto the jet and pulled you into an embrace. "You're never going on a mission without me again." He pulled back and looked at your face and saw a sea of emotions behind your eyes. "You good?"

"I'll be fine. I just want to get the hell out of here." You could stand straight, but were moving slowly, favoring your left side where your wound still was. At the rate you were healing, hopefully the stitches could be removed that evening. They were what was giving you the hardest time moving. Bucky led you over to a seat and helped you strap in. Steve was carrying your supplies onto the jet a few moments later. Bucky clapped him on the back of the shoulder.

"Just a recon mission huh? I can't let the two of you out of my sight for a second." Steve laughed.

"That's what I get for opening my mouth and jinxing the mission." Steve had felt guilty for sleeping the whole night. You waved off his guilt. There was no reason the both of you should be awake. You were alert enough for the both of you. Your mind was swimming too hard against the current to let you rest. Steve moved to the front of the jet with Bucky near the controls.

"She looks like shit. Did she sleep at all? She looks exhausted." Steve cringed with guilt again.

"No. She was only supposed to let me sleep for a few hours and then wake me, but she let me sleep the whole damn night. She's putting on a brave face, but this stirred up a lot of her past and she's having a harder time than she's letting on."

"I can tell by her eyes. We'll talk to Tony when we get back. Between the three of us maybe we can convince her to let him give her something to sleep once we're in the safety of the compound. Don't look at me like that. I know how stubborn she is." Steve and Bucky's silent communication abilities were as strong as ever. Bucky glanced over his shoulder at you, a far away look on your face.

“She looks..” Steve finished Bucky’s sentence for him.

“Haunted Buck...she looks haunted. The look on her face when she saw that Doctor...I’ve never seen her react like that. She’s so tough. Nothing rattles her, at least not like that. How did we miss this? The tips that came in about this. How could there have been nothing they pointed towards her accident? How did we not know this was about her?” Bucky glanced back at you again before he looked at Steve.

“Because we kept everything a secret. If the team had known...if maybe at least Nat had known we would have pieced it together. No one knew about the accident, her family or how she basically reinvented herself. None of you ever asked her because Tony and I made it clear it was off limits. I wasn’t following up on the tips. You and Nat were on that. Tony did some, but not enough to piece anything together. This guy is good. I should have pushed her more to tell you guys.” Steve sighed, the weight of the world weighing down on his shoulders again.

“There are so many things we all could have done differently. Especially me. But now we DO know and we protect her and bring him down. She might not like it, but the team will need to know the full story. We can’t stop him if they don’t know. And I hate that she has to share her story. It’s just another way for him to violate her. But there’s no other way for us to protect her or stop him.”

“Let me just say this. Now, before we get back and get into it. I know you and Tony will move Heaven and Earth to keep her safe both physically and emotionally. I can say that if you or Tony try to bench her on this she’ll go rouge and God only knows what will happen. She will not sit this one out. Even if she is too close to the situation. Honestly, it’s my first instinct too. Keeping her away from him and this seems like the logical step. But I know her so we have to be smart about this. I don’t want her going off on her own and getting herself killed or doing something she can’t take back.” Steve let out a big breath of air.

“You’re right. That’s what I want to do. And Tony will too. You’re also right that she won’t accept it. I can’t say that I blame her though. I wouldn’t either.” Steve’s understanding of how you felt wasn’t surprising to Bucky. The two of you were very alike in some ways. Bucky sat down at the controls and started the Quinjet.

“Go sit with her, I got this.” Steve nodded and headed back to where you were seated.

Steve made his way and sat next to you, but you were so engrossed in your thoughts you didn’t even notice him. He took the moment to study your profile and really see you. The curve of your face and the slope of your nose. The shape of your face and the illumination of your purple eyes. He could stare at you forever. You finally noticed him sitting next to you. Your eyes met his and you gave him a half smile, but he could see the weariness in your eyes. You reached out and took his hand, hoping they he could anchor you down as you felt your inner turmoil pulling you away.

“We’ll be home soon.” You nodded, not trusting your voice not to crack. The more you thought about what Nick said...the more anxious you were becoming. How many people had they done this to? How many people were dead because of it. And then there was the idea that Cobb was selling these serums on the black market. What if he wasn’t selling the serum but the people he injected. Steve could see your mind taking you down the rabbit hole of despair. You felt his thumb comfortingly rubbing over the top of your hand. You looked back at him and stared into his eyes. They reminded you of the ocean and you wanted to drown in it. “I got you.” He tried to comfort you. You nodded at him and looked forward again but intertwined your fingers with his to keep a tight grip on his hand. Bucky glanced back and saw you and Steve in your own little world. Your world might be in fire, Bucky thought to himself, but maybe those flames would bring his two best friends together.

***

“She’s resting now.” Bruce walked back out into the common area. He and Tony had used your blood sample to create an injection to counter act whatever was on the blade that stabbed you.

“Did she let you give her something to help her sleep?” Steve was weary from the trip back. His head was pounding from over thinking.

“Yes. I told her she needs to sleep to heal properly and once she’s bounced back she can get back to work but that no one will let her do anything if she doesn't take care of herself first. It was hard for her to say no to that. She did mutter something before she fell asleep, I don’t know what it means but I’m assuming you three do.” Bruce looked between Tony, Bucky and Steve. “She said she doesn’t think the accident was an accident.” Both Tony and Bucky looked alarmed, but Steve knew exactly what you were talking about.

“I think she’s right.” Steve’s voice was solemn. “We didn't talk about it, but I was thinking about it the entire way back here. The way that guy was talking. She said that Nick told Cobb they could make more and to let her go. There’s no way they could be on the scene of multiple accidents like that. They had to be creating them.” Bucky paled.

“Her survivors guilt has to be in over drive. She had it before, but if they targeted her family to take her? She won’t get over that. I’ve got to call Nat and tell her I can’t meet her. I was going to go to Clint's for a few days and then bring her back to the compound.” Bucky ran his hand down his face.

“No Bucky, go and get Nat. Camille will appreciate having her here. Just call her and tell her what's going on and only spend the night at Clint's. You’ll be back by tomorrow evening. She’ll probably sleep until then with the pain meds and the sedatives Bruce gave her. Rogers and I are here. We’ve got her.” Steve was still impressed by the progress Tony and Bucky had made. Their mutual affection for you had really brought them together.

“He’s right Buck. Go get Nat. . I’ll keep a a close eye on her and let her know you'll be back tomorrow night.” Bucky contemplated Steve.

“You’ll call me if she needs me?”

“Of course. We got this, okay?” Bucky nodded. He didn’t want to leave Nat hanging but he didn’t want to abandon you. Steve could see the conflict all over his face. “I promise.” Bucky nodded and hurried off to get his bag. The sooner he got to Natasha, the sooner he could get her home.

Steve looked back to Tony after Bucky was gone. Tony studied Steve’s face for a moment. He saw a lot of things in his eyes, the most apparent was his worry and his affection for you.

“So uh...you and Cam...” Steve snapped his eyes up to Tony’s. Tony watched as he paled for a moment and then his cheeks turned a deep red. “Look, we all know you have a thing for her. I’m like 99% sure it’s mutual. The two of you just refuse to accept it, acknowledge it and or deal with it. You have trauma from being frozen for almost a century. She has her own trauma. You’re both scared. I get that. Man do I get that. Pull your head out of your ass Rogers. This life? Nothing is guaranteed. You know that first hand. Stop wasting time. Oh and you’re going to have to make the first move because she is absolutely terrified of letting anyone get close to her again. You and I both know loss. But Cam...she was 18 years old and watched her whole family die and then had to leave the life she knew to hide. She was smart enough to know what would happen to her. She spent 3 years isolating herself before i barged into her life and brought her here. She needs you to break down the last of the walls she has built around herself. You were there for her, Barnes told me what happened. The fact that she told you what she told you is huge progress for her. She never wants anyone to feel sorry for her and she doesn’t ever want to feel vulnerable or weak. You are the most honorable man I know. Honorable to a fault if I’m being honest. You’re a good man and I think you’re what she needs. She needs someone to love her.”

“She has people that love her. She doesn’t need me. I don’t think she needs anyone. She’s the strongest person I’ve ever met. She opened up to me because she didn’t think she had a choice but to tell me. I think she could do without me.”

“You’re an idiot if you believe any of what you just said other than her being so strong. She is, she’s tough as nails. Don’t think for one second she would have told you jack shit if she didn’t want to. She would have told you to mind your own business. She deserves to be happy. You deserve to be happy. Just get out of your own way and be happy together.” It wasn’t often that Tony’s advice wasn’t laced with sarcasm and sass. Tony took Steve’s lack of response as acceptance. “Go watch over our girl.” Tony turned and headed in the direction of his lab. Steve watched as her paused for a moment and turned back to Steve.

“Just know Cap that if you hurt her, there isn’t a serum strong enough to protect you.” Tony gave Steve a pointed look and then left the room. Steve leaned against the counter considering Tony’s words. Your bright smile and melodic laugh were echoing in his mind as he made his way to your bedroom to check on you. Tony was right. Bucky was right. Of course they were right; the only other people that knew him just as well were Nat and Sam, but Bucky and Tony could see through him in a way that no one else could. It was easier to keep you at arms length. He didn’t want to admit that you were under his skin, that you had infiltrated his entire being. It was easier to keep his feelings veiled by self-righteousness and irritation than to let them in. You challenged him, kept him on his toes, just like Peggy had. And how had that turned out? He couldn’t couldn’t lose another woman he loved. Deep down, in the part of him that he didn’t allow to see the light of day, he knew he was in love with you. How could he not be?

Personality wise he had a type, that much was obvious. You were fierce and weren’t afraid to tell him he was wrong. That first mission you told him it was a set up and he was sure you were wrong. Anyone else, any new recruit at SHIELD, they would never dream to challenge his orders let alone get in his face after his orders blew up in his face. Your passion to save those who couldn’t save themselves, the fury that literally flickered in your eyes had made him feel things. Things he never thought he would feel for any other woman again. He had felt like he had to shut it down before it started.

You were beautiful. Anyone with eyes could see that. The way the shine of your black hair would sparkle in the sun. Your eyes, your damn eyes, were intoxicating. They weren’t exactly purple. The violet had a touch of grey that gave them a natural look. He hated when you wore your contacts and covered them up. They had been necessary when you were on mission to see through the appearance enhancer technology, but you wore them more often than not. Steve knew you desperately wanted to feel normal, come off as normal. You were anything but. Even before the serum, Steve knew you were extraordinary. He vowed to himself that he would make you realize how special you were. How he loved the way the magenta sparked in your eyes. He wanted to help you love it too.

He slowly opened your door. Tony had made sure Friday kept it unlocked for the time being so they could check on you. There you were, dark hair splayed out across your pillows. You seemed to be blissfully and peacefully asleep. Steve knew that it was the sedatives. Inside you were full of turmoil. He leaned over to brush the hair off of your face and kissed your forehead. He pulled the arm chair you had in the corner of your room closer to the bed and took a seat. He didn’t want you to wake up alone.

He looked around your room. As much as you tried to hide the purple in your eyes, it was on full display in your personal space. Steve wasn’t sure if you even realized you had done it. Your walls, like most of the walls in the compound were a dove gray. Your bed spread was a shade of bluish-purple and your sheets were light violet. The chair he was sitting in matched your bed spread. No doubt the work of Tony Stark. You had a large black book shelf that was chock full of books of every genre. Classics like Moby Dick, 1984 and Jane Eyre. You had every single Harry Potter book and books that you liked to call your guilty pleasures like the Pretty Little Liars series. Grimm’s Fairy Tales and stories by Gregory Maguire occupied almost a full shelf. They were some of your favorites. You loved fairy tales and you loved his spin on them. He remembered how thrilled you had been last Christmas when Tony had gifted you a few you didn’t have yet. You had a tattered copy of Lewis Carroll’s Alice in Wonderland next to your bed, but Steve had seen an almost brand new copy in your hands a few weeks ago. Steve didn’t want to invade your privacy so he stopped himself from picking up the copy next to your bed. He knew there was a story there. He realized reading was your way to escape. To forget the horrors you had experienced, even for a little while.

You had a matching black desk and lined up on it were a handful of leather journals in varying shades of purple. Steve was itching to read them, he had seen you sitting outside furiously writing in them. Yet he would never invade your most private of thoughts. It would be like someone tearing through his sketch books without his permission.

Steve stood to take a look at the handful of pictures you had framed in your room. He hadn’t ever spent a lot of time in here so he never got a chance to really look. As he studied them, he felt himself smile. While you had lost your family, you had made a new one here. Tony Stark made an appearance in quite a few of the framed photos. You had a picture of Tony and Pepper taken from one of the parties Tony was famous for. They weren’t looking at the camera or posing for the picture. It had been taken from the side as they looked and smiled at each other. The love and happiness radiating from both of their eyes. Steve could only hope that one day you would look at him like that, if he hadn’t messed things up beyond repair with you. There was a picture of you, Tony and Pepper taken during your first New Years at the compound. Pepper was laughing as you and Tony wore “Happy New Years” tiaras and the obnoxious glasses that were in the shape of the year and a bunch of beaded necklaces. Then there was one of just you and Tony. It was just a random night at the compound and you had snapped the picture of the two of you. Tony and Pepper had truly become the parental figures you had needed. Not that they took the place of your parents but they had help fill the hole in your heart just a bit.

One of Steve’s favorites was of you and Bucky. It had been the 4th of July. The two of you were wearing American Flag shorts and matching Captain America T-Shirts just to tease Steve. You had red, white and blue ribbons braided into your hair and you had somehow convinced Bucky to paint his face red, white and blue. Sam was in the background double over in laughter as you stood in a “super hero pose” completed with an American flag cape. The final picture on your desk took him by surprise. It was a picture of Steve and Bucky. Taken similarly like the one of Tony and Pepper. It could have been the same night. They were both wearing Tuxedos. Bucky’s hair was still long and he had it neatly slicked back. They were both staring in the same direction.

“I love that picture.” Your voice came out in a hoarse whisper. Steve set the picture down and turned to you. You still looked hazy from the medication Bruce had given you. Your skin was still a ghostly white, your hair tussled by sleep.

“Sorry. It just caught my eye.” You smiled softly and rubbed your face.

“There’s nothing to apologize for. It was sitting on my desk, you weren’t rifling through my stuff.” Steve walked over and sat on the edge of your bed.

“I’m surprised you’re awake. Bruce said he gave you a heavy sedative.”

“Medication seems to work through my system more quickly than a normal person. The advanced healing and what not”

“Can I see?” Steve motioned to your stomach. You nodded and pulled your t-shirt up so he could see your stomach. Bruce had taken out the stitches Steve had done and you had an angry red mark. Steve ran his finger over it and he watched goose bumps pop up all over your skin. He met your eyes and he saw a slight blush on your cheeks.

“Bruce said the scar should slowly fade since whatever they stabbed me with seemed to just slow my healing so your janky stitches shouldn’t leave a mark.” You had a hint of your signature teasing smirk on your face. Steve laughed lightly and took your hand.

“You really scared me. I thought I, that we were going to lose you.”

“It was a good reminder that I’m not invincible. I tend to think that nothing can touch me. Thank you for taking care of me. Not just after I was stabbed, but before too.”

“Anytime. You should get some rest. I’ll stay with you.”

“Did Bucky go for Nat?” You ignored Steve’s urging for you to get rest.

“He did.” He studied your face as you grabbed your phone off of the night stand and were furiously typing with your thumbs. “What’s happening?” You set the phone back down.

“I asked him to tell Nat. I don’t think I can keep telling the story. Tony can tell everyone else.” Steve saw a small tear slip from the corner of your eye. You slowly pulled yourself up into a sitting position, waving Steve off as he tried to help you.

“I think that Martin Cobb has been causing the accidents to create more people like me.”

“I know. You said something to Bruce before the sedative knocked you out. I agree.”

“You do? You don’t think I’m being crazy.” Steve laughed.

“I think we both know by now that you’re incredibly intuitive. You’re also rarely wrong. There’s also no way he could happen upon that many random accidents, not if he's been slowly trying to build an army. Cam, I promise you that we will find him, find the others and stop him. But you have to recover first. You have to be firing on all cylinders. I need you at 100%. And we have to find him first. It won’t be easy.” When Steve looked at your face you were grinning. “What?”

“Say it again.”

“What?”

“That I’m always right.”

“No, no...I said you’re rarely wrong. There’s a big difference.” You rolled your eyes. “Good to see you feeling more like yourself.” Steve moved to sit next to you and rested his back against your head board. He froze for a moment when you rested your head on his shoulder. He hesitated for a moment and then wrapped his arm around you. He smiled slightly as you moved into him and rested your head on his chest.

"I was thinking too how we thought he was trafficking drugs and then jumped to him trafficking the serums. What if he's not giving out the serums, but trying to sell the individuals he's enhanced."

"That’s...that's horrifying. And entirely possible." Steve let the idea sink in.

"Cam...we're gonna figure all of this out and stop him, regardless of what he's doing. I promise."

“I’m scared. I haven't felt scared like this since the accident. I’m terrified of what he's done, of what he's going to do. I can't get the idea of innocent people being manufactured as weapons, the same way Bucky was. I’m afraid to go to sleep because I know the nightmares are going to come again. I thought I left them behind.”

“I could have Bruce give you something to help you sleep again.”

“It makes it worse. I can’t wake myself up from the nightmare. It’s like I’m trapped. All I can see is the lifeless faces of my family, the smell of their blood...now faceless people suffering at Martin Cobb's hands” your voice trailed off.

“Then I’ll be here to wake you up.” He felt you nod your head against him. You turned on your side and wrapped your arms around his waist, your ear resting against his chest. He was certain you could hear his heart pounding. He brought his hand up and slowly started running his fingers through your dark locks until he felt your breathing even out and you were asleep again.

***

You slowly started getting back into a routine. You kept your distance from most of the team, not wanting to talk about the events that transpired. Tony was desperately trying to find Martin Cobb but he was as elusive as ever. Any time he got close to an idea of where he was hiding, something changed and he lost him again. No one could figure out how he was targeting individuals, what he was pushing on the side. It was a mystery. If Tony couldn't find him, if the resources and SHIELD couldn't find him, how could he be stopped? You spent a lot of time working out. Pounding on the treadmill or a heavy bag was how you let out most of your pent up aggression. You didn't even want spar with Bucky. For the first time in a very long time, you just wanted to be left alone, with the exception of Steve Rogers. Even Steve was only acceptable in minimal doses. You ran with him around the compound in the morning after breakfast, the two of you often ate a silent dinner together and then went for a walk at night to help you wind down. While you wouldn't talk about what you were feeling, Steve knew you had pent up frustration, anxiety and anger that you had to try and work it out of your body. Every night, Steve came to your room to go to sleep and as promised woke you up from every single nightmare. Everyone in the compound had silently agreed to give you ample space. If they noticed what was happening with you and Steve, they didn’t say anything, with the exception of Bucky.

It was early on a Thursday morning that Bucky came upon Steve in the kitchen. He was standing at the counter in front of the coffee maker, staring off into space. The lack of sleep since the two of you had gotten back was getting to him. He was trying to figure out a way to get you to open up more without pushing too hard. Talking about what was on your mind might help lessen your nightmares. He would go without sleep for the rest of his life for you, but he could tell the constant waking up was affecting you too. Last night Steve had come in to your room to go to sleep and you had thrown your worn "Alice in Wonderland" book into the drawer of your night stand and wordlessly turned on a movie to fall asleep to. Steve didn't know what to say, he didn't know how to make you feel better. He just wanted to help you. Bucky jolted Steve from his thoughts when he slammed his hand down on the counter.

“I need to talk to you.” Bucky had his arms crossed over his chest. Steve turned and saw the serious expression on his friends face.

“What’s going on Buck?”

“You tell me.”

“Bucky...I’m tired, I’m going to need you to spell it out for me.”

“Late nights with Camille wearing you out?” His tone was laced with accusations.

“What are you talking about?”

“You’ve gone to her room literally every night for the past week. I’ve seen you. I usually go in to check on her, especially after what happened but you’re already in there. I know I told you to wake up to your feelings about her but is now really the time for you to start sleeping with her?” Steve scoffed.

“I’m not sleeping with her! I’m not involved with her like that. Have we gotten closer? Yeah of course we have, how could we not after everything? I was there when this all went down, for whatever reason she feels the most comfortable around me, I'm not going to rock that boat on her, I would NEVER take advantage of her, or anyone else for that matter. She’s having a hard time sleeping. Her nightmares are back. I promised her I’d wake her up every time. That’s why I’ve been staying with her. I’d think you’d know me better than that. And not for nothing you’re the one that told me to ponder my feelings for her!” Steve took a defensive stance.

“God, I’m an asshole. I’m sorry." Bucky ran his hand down his face in frustration. He had been worried sick about you and you had been pushing him away and closing yourself off. "My over protective side kicked in. I know you aren’t like that. Jesus I’m sorry. I haven’t wanted to push her into talking. It's driving me crazy not knowing what's going on with her. I had no idea her nightmares were back. If you're staying up with her, that explains why you look like shit.” Steve laughed and shook his head.

“She’s having like 2 or 3 a night. I don’t know what to do for her. She doesn’t want to talk about it. I know Tony is hunting for Cobb but won’t let her help until she’s back on her feet 100%. Physically she's there, but mentally she isn't and that's why he's keeping her away from it. She’s going crazy. She’s in the gym now beating the crap out of a heavy bag. I’m not sure her training with anyone else is a good idea. She’s got so much rage in her, she might not be able to stop.”

“I swear to God I’m going to kill that man with my bare hands.” Steve could see the rage in Bucky’s features. “Mostly because I don’t want her to do it and have it open more wounds. There’s no way she’s going to let him walk away from this.”

“Murder isn’t the answer.” Steve knew Bucky was right, you were going to try to end Martin Cobb's life. “We have to convince her to let us take him in.” “Well you let me know how that goes for you.”

“Buck.”

“Steve, not everyone deserves to live. Some people deserve to be dead.”

“But we can’t be the ones to make the choice! That makes us no better than them. It’s one thing I’d someone dies in battle. But we can’t go around executing people. We just can’t.”

“I know. You’re right. I just can’t deal with anyone getting away with hurting her.” Bucky looked around to make sure no one was coming. “She told me you kissed her. And if you say it was for the mission I’m going to punch you.” The heat rushed to Steve’s face.

“Fine...I was looking for an excuse. Once I finally let my guard down to her...I don’t know, she’s just...I just want to be near her. But now I don’t want to act on it because she’s not in the right head space.”

“So just be there for her. You guys are like two different people than the ones that went on that mission. Sticking by her through this, the right time will present itself.” Steve hummed in agreement. “She feels the same way, she admitted it when she told me about the kiss. So don’t go convincing yourself she doesn’t. Also- I frigging told you so.” Bucky clapped Steve on the back and left him to his much needed coffee.

***

You had just gotten out of the shower and were laying on your bed in a pair of leggings and a baggy t-shirt, your hair braided around your head. Your mind was like a battlefield. All you wanted to do was quiet the noise. A loud knock at your door shook you out of your thoughts. Before you could even answer, Tony strolled in.

“Okay. I know you’re in a bad place but I’m not letting you mope or angrily stomp around. We’re going to get Cobb, take down his whole operation and help whoever else he juiced up. But in the mean time, you have to live. So get up and get dressed. Wear something nice.”

“No Tony. I’m not in the mood to go out or party or anything along those lines.”

“Oh I’m sorry, I didn’t mean for that to sound optional. In exactly 1 hour Captain Rogers will come in this room to get you. You can make yourself look presentable or he can drag you out of here in that get up looking homeless. It’s your choice.” You groaned and threw yourself back on your bed and stared up at the ceiling. You wallowed for a few more moments and dragged yourself out of your bed and went into your bathroom to do your makeup and fix your hair. Your wardrobe was an entirely different issue. You had no desire to wear something that wasn’t in the realm of pajamas. But you also knew that Tony wasn't lying about Steve dragging you out of this room. Steve had been begging you to go out and do something for the entire week. He knew it wasn't good for you to sit around and stew in your emotions.

A little while later you were standing in front of your full length mirror in black shorts and a gold sequined V-Neck T-shirt and black heeled gladiator sandals. Your cherry red toenails gleaming under the light of your room. You had taken your hair out of it's braid and piled it on top of your head in a messy up-do. The summer heat was getting to you and your hair felt like a blanket most of the time.

Never one to be late, you heard Steve Rogers knock on your door. You gave Friday the command to open the door and Steve strolled in wearing black dress pants and a blue shirt that made his eyes pop and was tight across the chest and his biceps. It really wasn't fair for one man to be so perfect looking. He smiled at you. "Wow. You look beautiful." You were never great at taking compliments, but his made you feel fuzzy.

"Well my homeless look wasn't doing much for Tony. What is he making me do?" Steve smirked as you crossed your arms in front of you and jutted your hip out demanding answers.

"I've been instructed to tell you nothing. And I don't really feel like having to fight Tony in his suit tonight. It causes a lot of damage and clean up is always a bitch." Your laugh rang through the room. Steve reached his hand out and you took a few steps forward and placed yours in his so he could lead you out of the room. The change in your relationship in the weeks since your mission was astounding. Never in a million years would you have believed anyone if they told you Steve Rogers was the one keeping your nightmares at bay and taking care of you. It was nice. Being close to him physically and emotionally was really nice. You worried that it was only because of what happened and not because he wanted to be there and be close to you as a person. Part of you, your brain, was screaming to run and protect yourself, yet your heart wanted to stick around and find out. Your heart was winning the war. You silently prayed that the risk would be worth the reward. You also knew that if this crashed and burned you would probably not let anyone else in ever again.

Steve led you to the party room in the compound that Tony had built specifically for events. It had a large, spacious dance floor, a lounge area, a beautiful and fully stocked bar, a wrap around balcony with seating areas to look out at the sky and a gorgeous outdoor patio that displayed every single star in the sky on a clear night with a breathtaking stone fire pit. Steve felt you stop and jolt him back. He turned to look at you as panic, terror and a little bit of anger crossed over your features.

"Steve...if this is a surprise party for my birthday. I...I don't want to go in. I can't. I can't do this."

"How Tony thought he could pull this off without you figuring it out before hand is beyond me." Steve stepped back towards you and cupped your face in his hands. "Camille...you can do this. I know what happened was awful. It was a lifetimes worth of awful on the one day that should always be your happiest. You can't live in that place forever. You deserve happiness and to be celebrated. We're your family and we love you...we want to celebrate you. Let us do that. You deserve it more than anyone. I know it's hard. But you told Bucky that maybe it was time for you to stop mourning that day. So let me walk you through those doors and let us all be grateful for the day you came into this world. I will be right there with you the whole time." Steve's thumb stroked your cheek. Your felt like your stomach had dropped out of your body with how his blue eyes were piercing into yours. You took a deep breath and reveled in the feeling of his hands on your face and turned your cheek slightly into his palm. He watched as your eyes flashed a little magenta. Whatever you were feeling it was strong.

"Okay Steve." He smiled at you. You knew at that moment you would never be able to deny him anything he asked of you ever again. He slid his hands down to your shoulders and then your arms. He rested one hand on the small of your back and slowly led you into the room. You couldn't even help but smile with happy tears when your friends and your newly formed family yelled out surprise.

The room was filled with not only the Avengers but SHIELD agents and people who worked for Stark Industries. You let Steve lead you over to the bar where Bucky, Nat, Sam and Tony were waiting for you.

"You didn't run." Bucky greeted you with a smile and a hug.

"No- our friend was pretty convincing."

"It's good to see you smile again. It's all going to be okay." Bucky whispered in your ear before he let you go so you could hug Nat and then Sam. You wanted to smack Tony's grin off of his face. He was gloating.

"I knew he could get you here. I'm also glad you decided to change." You wrapped your arms around his waist and he engulfed you in a hug. "You deserve this. Enjoy yourself. Don't think about the bad stuff, we can think about that tomorrow okay?" He felt you nod against his chest. "Go...have fun." He shoved you towards Steve slightly and went off to Rhodey and Happy who were across the room.

"Camille!" You knew who the booming voice belonged to before you even turned around. Steve watched as your face erupted into a smile.

"Thor!" You spun around and ran to hug him. Steve knew there was nothing to your reaction. Everyone loved Thor. Yet, seeing him scoop you up in a hug sent the tiny pang to white hot jealousy coursing through his veins.

"Maybe you should do something about that." Natasha was leaning against the bar grinning at Steve.

"She's going through too much. It's not the right time." Nat scoffed.

"Yeah, I heard about Bucky's freak out. Don't listen to him. Look...there's always something going on in our lives. Someone is always dealing with some sort of trauma. If you wait until things settle...you'll be waiting for the rest of your life. You out of anyone should know how precious time is and how we can't waste it. And quite honestly I'm sick of listening to you two bicker and then pine after each other. It's annoying. If you want to be with her, tell her." Nat pushed off the bar and went to join Bucky who had drifted over to the lounge area bickering with Sam.

Steve kept his distance for a good portion of the night, stuck in his head, trying to decide what he should do. The two of you had made progress in your relationship. You were friends now. He wanted more. Everyone told him that you wanted more. He was psyching himself out. Watching you laugh and place your hand on Thor's arm was making his insides churn. Steve watched as Thor kissed you on the cheek and headed away from you. He wanted to punch something until you turned and smiled your best smile at him. His breath caught in his throat as he watched you walk over to him. Never had that smile been for him. Never before had you looked at him like he was the only person in the room.

"Where have you been all night? You vanished, I was hoping to spend the party with you." Your head was cocked to the side as you leaned against the bar, still smiling at him.

"You were with Thor. I figured you hadn't seen him in a while so I wanted to give you your space." He watched confusion pass over your face, and then a tiny spark of realization.

"That's true. But I still wish you had joined us." You looked down for a moment and then looked up at him through your dark lashes. Steve took a step closer to you and placed his hand on the side of your face and stroked your cheek with his thumb like he had done so many times in the past few weeks.

"I'm sorry I disappointed you." You looked nervous. You were seemingly just as nervous as he was. It was the best kind of nervous.

"You could make it up to me."

"Oh yeah? How so?" You were both in your own little world. You didn't even notices Bucky and Natasha watching you shyly flirt back and forth. The two of you together were like a baby doe. If they approached, they would ruin the moment and you would both run for it.

"You could dance with me." You put your hand out, palm up. He hesitated for a moment. You didn't know what the idea of dancing with someone meant to him. He shook his ghosts away and smiled at you, taking your hand in his.

"I'd love to." He led you hand and hand out to the dance floor, and while to the two of you it seemed the stars were aligning as the music slowed down, the reality of the situation was that everyone was waiting for you two to get together and took advantage of you approaching the dance floor to slow the music down. Steve's hand found the small of your back, a place that felt like home to him, a place where he found himself touching almost ever day. He pulled you close to him, the heels your were wearing brought you closer to his height, but definitely not to eye level. You were tall enough to be able to wrap your arm over his shoulder and place your hand at the back of his neck as he held your other hand in is. Feeling your body pressed up against his, you hadn't realized what you had been missing since you met him; since you had been fighting to keep him at arms length, struggling to keep him and your great big feelings at bay. Once again, your pesky little heart was drowning out the unnecessary screams of your brain to run.

The two of you moved in sync with the music silently for a while, just enjoying being close to one another. You felt the side of Steve's head drop a little to press against yours so he could whisper in your ear.

"Happy Birthday sweetheart." The endearing term had your heart pounding. You normally hated nicknames like that. The only person that got away with anything like that was Bucky when he called you doll; only because half of the time he didn't even realize he was doing it. But you could listen to Steve calling you sweetheart for the rest of your life. You felt a chill run down your spine as his lips brushed against your ear.

"I never wanted to celebrate. I didn't feel like I had a reason to celebrate. Not until now." Steve pulled his head up so he could look into your eyes. He studied your expression for a moment. With the way he was looking at you, you were certain he was going to kiss you. Really kiss you, not as some poor excuse to save a mission. Just when it seemed like he was going to lean down, the entire room went dark. You felt Steve's grip on you tighten as you both turned to a video being projected on the wall. You had no idea where it was coming from. Then, Martin Cobb's smug face was grinning at the room and you felt a wave of nausea and then rage surge through you.

"Well hello Avengers, Shield agents, friends of Y/N...I mean Camille." You visibly winced when he used your real name. "I keep forgetting that you changed everything about yourself after I changed you. I hear Happy Birthday is in order. Well belated, you were busy murdering one of my best men on your birthday. Though I'm sure he had it coming and he gave you cause. I hope you're okay after that stab wound you got. You never know harmful a dirty blade can be." Your jaw clenched at the implication. You wanted to rip this man to shreds.

"How the hell did he know you were stabbed?" Steve whispered to you, but you couldn't respond. You couldn't take your eyes off the man that had ruined your life. You waited for him to continue.

"I had NO idea that the day we crossed paths so many years ago was your birthday. What a gift I gave you! The ability to heal yourself, those around you, those fancy little force fields. And I hear that now you're quite the fighter. I'm assuming from your training with our mass murdering friend The Winter Solider. Yes, my dear Camille, I know all about you. What you've done since you escaped my grasp. I am so sorry about your family. Unfortunate collateral damage. Though if I'm being honest I had really hoped that we would have gotten you AND your sister...or at least your sister. You proved my point to Dr. Yablowski that the younger the subjects are, the better. The more impressionable they are. You ran, you hid your abilities until Stark dragged you out of wherever hole you had dug for yourself. You know, I really have to thank you Tony. I sincerely thought our dear girl was actually dead until I caught video footage of her working with the Avengers. It didn't take me long to infiltrate and get all the information I needed. And Camille, your Houdini Act allowed me to change my strategy. I'm building myself quite a team of child soldiers. Taking their parents from them at a young age. Orphans are SO GRATEFUL to generous benefactors after they lose everything. Oh...I fear I've said too much. I know you're looking for me, but you wont find me. Not until we're ready. Then, we'll be coming for you. Happy Birthday Y/N."

The room went dark again and you could hear the frantic murmurs from the crowd. When the lights finally came on Steve could see the range of emotions on your face. Rage, fear, sadness ad determination. Tony and Bucky were quickly approaching the two of you. Tony had a hard time meeting your eyes.

"I'm so sorry. I don't know how he got through my systems. I'm so sorry I brought you here. They never would have found you..." Your eyes snapped to Tony.

"He always would have found me. Some how, some way. Don't you dare blame yourself. You gave me my life back, a purpose, a family." A few tears slipped from your eyes.

"Guys..." Bucky interrupted. "We have a bigger problem. Cobb has someone on the inside. And we need to figure out who the hell it is."

Tony quickly cleared out the party, Steve had led you outside to get some air, his arm firmly around your waist holding you up. It was taking all of your strength not to fall apart. He was targeting children, taking away everything they knew and loved so he could mold them into something else, a weapon. You would die before you let him succeed. Steve had stood himself in front of the door to signal to everyone else that you needed space. You were sitting on the bench looking out at the clear summer sky. The stars were mocking you with their sparkle. Everyone must have got the message about bothering you as Steve had moved away from the door and closer to you. You felt his hand slide over your shoulder and he slowly turned you to look at him.

“Listen to me. We are going to find him. We are going to rescue those kids. I promise you that. This is all going to be okay. It might take some time but we always get there. C’mon sit down.” He led you over to the bench a little further down so he could sit next to you, your bodies angled towards each other so that your knee was touching his. He reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a small wrapped box. “I got this for you. Tony pulled this party together pretty quickly. I was lucky I found what I wanted." He paused for a moment to consider his words. "I know this is probably the worst time to tell you this. I just can't wait anymore. I just...I regret all the time we wasted, I wasted not being close to you. Keeping you at arms length. I don’t know how you feel. I just know that I feel something. I have for a while and it was easier to push you away than to let you in. I think I didn’t want to risk loosing another person I cared about. Like I said, I know this isn’t the best time and that you’re going through a lot. I don’t want you to feel pressured. I just want you to know that I’m here for you, in whatever capacity you need me or want me to be. And when you're ready we can talk more about how I feel about you. I don't want another moment to go by without you knowing that you mean something to me.”

Your hands shook slightly as you peeled the tape off of the small rectangular box. You knew it was some piece of jewelry by the grey-blue velvet box. You slowly popped it open. Inside was a white gold dream catcher necklace. There were three solid feathers hanging from the circular webbing. Inside the circle, scattered through the webbing were tiny diamonds with one small diamond directly in the center. You looked up at Steve as he studied your face in anticipation. “In case I’m not there to keep the nightmares away. I hope you like it.”

You were speechless. Normally he would make a crack about your lack of response but now wasn’t the time. Your eyes met his and you placed your hand on his cheek and rubbed it with your thumb, the same gesture he had done so many times since your trip to South America. You couldn’t properly put together a sentence that could accurately describe how you were feeling. He watched as you shifted yourself and sat on his lap, keeping your hand on his face. You silently searched his eyes for a moment and then you were pressing your lips against his. It was the only way for you to show him exactly how you felt. He shifted and pulled you closer to him and depended the kiss. After a few moments you were both breathless so you pulled away and rested your forehead against his.

“Thank you.” You whispered. “I love this. So much.” You pulled back slightly so you could look him in the eyes. “I feel something for you too. I think I always have. But like you I’ve been so damn scared. I don’t know if my heart could take loosing another person I loved. Letting Tony in was the hardest thing I’ve done and then Bucky. I had steeled myself against letting anyone close to me. And then I met you, and I knew I was in trouble.” You saw his eyes crinkle with a smile, you couldn’t help but smile back. “It was easier for me to let you think I was this brat that had to have her way. That I couldn’t take orders. I wanted you to not like me, so then I would end up not liking you. It didn’t work. Even when you were yelling at me all I wanted to do was kiss your stupid perfect lips. You’re a good man. You’re kind, generous, you put others first, always. Even when I thought you hated me I knew you would sacrifice yourself for me.”

“You were kind of a brat.” You laughed and pressed your lips against his in a chaste kiss.

“I don’t know where this is going to take us, but I don’t want to waste any more time not being with you, I don’t want to push you away anymore either. I need you. I know I’m going to need you to get through this. It’s- it’s going to bring up a lot of bad stuff for me, more than it already has. I don’t want to be alone anymore. I don’t want to do this alone.” Steve watched as you got emotional and your panic started to rise.

“Hey, hey. Listen to me. You’ve never been alone. Not for one second. You will always have this family. Tony and Pepper, they love you like a daughter. When Tony assigned your training to Bucky...you gave him a purpose. And even when I wanted to throttle you, you had me. You have Sam, Nat, Bruce, Rhodey and Thor. We are all here for you. I am here for you, whatever you need.”

“Just hold me.” You whispered. He pulled you close to him and buried his face in your neck as you rested your chin on his shoulder. If only you hadn’t pushed him away for so long, you could have felt like this sooner. He made you feel safe. He made you feel like everything was going to be okay even though deep down you knew it would be, not for a while anwyay.

“C’mon- let‘s get inside and get some rest. Tomorrow will be a long day.” You nodded and let Steve lead you into the compound to your room. You wanted to pretend, at least for one night that your world wasn't on fire. You wanted to take one night to not think about how Martin Cobb had robbed you of your family and was doing the same thing to other kids. You didn't want to think about him trying to sell any of those kids to the highest bidder to be their weapon. Steve was right, tomorrow and the days to follow until this was done would be long. You knew wouldn’t rest again until you found Martin Cobb and put a bullet in his head.

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aelaer · 5 years ago

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Whumptober 30: Recovery

I did say at the beginning of this series that Endgame was sorta… not really paid attention to. So yeah, same mantra.

Direct sequel (and conclusion!) to all of these:

Part 1: Shackled Part 2: Bound Part 3: Winded Part 4: Muffled Scream Part 5: Beaten

If you’ve been able to read the rest of the series without any of the warnings being an issue, then yeah, this’ll be fine. Just minor canon-typical violence.

30. Recovery

The world exploded into a series of reds, whites, purples, and blacks that blinded his sight and made him shut his eyes at the dizzying cacophony. It was accompanied by the sound of pulsing energy, explosive fire, and cracked stone, and beyond all that there were shouts of surprise and chaos.

When Stephen dared open his eyes again, the abominable horror reaching out from the inky darkness, ready to tear into him and consume him, was gone. He squeezed his eyes shut once more, then opened them yet again; yes, it was really gone. The portal was broken, the ritual interrupted by gold and red streaks, loud sounds, and figures he couldn't quite make out in his current state.

A small part of his mind wondered if this was an illusion by the eldritch abomination that had entered his mind. It was very possible; with such timing, it did seem a little too good to be true. That would be a very good nightmare, and he knew such beings were certainly capable. Was this one? It probably could do something like that, but it seemed more of the world-exploding type of demon rather than something so personable. It had, however, singled him out by name across the multiverse...

Stephen slowly shook his head out of his rambling thoughts. He needed to pay attention in case this wasn't an illusion or fever dream or anything of the sort. There were definitely people fighting, that much was obvious. Definitely Kamar-Taj sorcerers, and quite a few of them at that. That red stuff… that was Wanda Maximoff. She used Chaos Magic, didn't she? He wondered if she would be willing to let him study her abilities a bit more, after all this… but wait, Maximoff. Avengers? Would the Avengers really bother with him? This wasn't even Earth.

Mmm, world-ending, though. He did say that to Wong, didn't he? Wong didn't like the name, either (and now it was a name Stephen refused to directly think about in his head, not after seeing the demonic creature); now he understood Wong's horror. Was the powerful demon still in his head? All this truly could just be an illusion perpetrated by the entity to give him a false hope before ending his miserable life—

"Doctor Strange," a soft voice said behind him, and it caused him to startle (and jerk his wrists, which really hurt, dear fuck, how hard had he tugged at the ropes?). "It's Natasha Romanoff. Clint and I are getting you out of here."

He wasn't quite sure what he should say, at least when he could speak again. 'Thank you' seemed rather inadequate. Would asking them to prove they were real be too rude?

Before he could think of a good answer, the ropes at both wrists were cut and oh God it was agony, absolute agony, and he didn't even try to catch himself. Thankfully two sets of hands caught him before he completely did a faceplant on the stone altar (and in his own blood— that was a surprising amount of blood). They maneuvered him to the back of the altar, away from the explosions and colors and shouting. Clint was taking off the awful, awful gag as Natasha said into an earpiece, "Need a portal."

Wait, no, there was still fighting going on. "Need to help," Stephen murmured the moment he could speak.

"You need to sit tight until we get you into the medbay," Clint retorted.

He opened his mouth to argue, but suddenly Wong was there, just a few feet away. He blinked at him, but Wong was already forming a portal in between himself and the small group. Before Stephen could say anything, his friend pushed it towards them.

Oh. This must by the so-called medbay. It smelled very much like a medbay. They were still sitting on the floor, though now Natasha and Clint were trying to pull him to his feet and truth be told, Stephen really didn't feel like walking.

Everything hurt. He let the two of them support him as he took a deep breath. When he looked up, he was being ushered into a room by nurses and doctors he didn't recognize. They started asking questions, talking, and fuck it, no matter if this was an illusion or reality, he wasn't going to just stand by as they talked about his state over him.

"Hypovolemic, but not in shock," he interrupted one of the nurses as he was helped to lay on his uninjured stomach upon the bed. "Well… maybe mild shock at most. Definitely not— didn't lose over thirty percent. Didn't hit arteries." It was just the back; there were many more deadlier places to bleed from. He'd seen more lost blood in the ER time and again. He was fine.

Well, mostly fine.

So long as this wasn't an illusion, that is. He looked at his surroundings as they started the initial work on him. The tech was more advanced than he was used to at the Metro-General, but not so alien that it was completely incomprehensible. Natasha and Clint were in the corner of the large room, saying… something he couldn't hear. That made sense with the distance and the noise around him. So that was good, okay. At some point the staff got him hooked up to an IV, oximeter, and a sensor he wasn't familiar with for his other vitals. Something from Wakanda, perhaps… that was also a good sign. Good signs.

Stephen slowly began to relax, a sensation which only increased when some sort of painkiller hit his system. It wasn't a heavy opioid, but it turned the flaming pain into something that felt more like a sting than anything and he could work with that. They applied topical painkillers as they cleaned out and sutured his cuts shut, as well.

"Y'know I could just heal it with magic," he mumbled when Clint and Natasha came to his bedside.

"All your good sorcerer healing buddies are fighting," Clint said cheerfully. "I've never seen such a dangerous looking LARP group in my life."

"Hah," he mumbled. "Good precaution, though; there's a lot of them… the occultists."

"Yeah, we saw," Natasha pointed out. "The good news is that we had enough people between your guys and us to keep them all occupied while we found you and snuck you out. You were very easy to find, though."

Stephen made a face, and it wasn't at the work they were doing on his back (and now his wrists, which was proving to definitely sting). "You interrupted… at a good time." He swallowed. "The nick of time. It was… close."

Clint crossed his arms. "Wong was saying something about a world-eating entity. I'd call bullshit, but, well… maybe I'd have called bullshit ten years ago, is what I'm saying."

Natasha shot him a brief look of amusement. "What he's trying to ask is if it was that bad."

"It was that bad," he answered immediately. "I've… I've only encountered such immense power once."

"Thanos?" she asked.

"No, not Thanos."

Clint made a face. "Yeah, your job sucks, Doc."

"It's usually not this bad," he mumbled. "I get to do magic, after all."

"We all have bad days," Natasha reassured him. "We're going to let the doctors finish patching you up, Doctor Strange. I expect others are going to come see how you're doing as soon as they're finished up with those occultists."

Stephen mumbled an affirmative and closed his eyes as the two left him to the doctors and nurses.

—————

About two hours later, an impressive crowd came into his room.

"Hey Doc, look, I brought flowers," Tony said in greeting, lifting up the genuinely ugliest bouquet of flowers Stephen had ever seen in his life.

"You brought me a bunch of thistles," he said slowly.

"Well, yeah. You know, for a speedy recovery, good health, protection, and the other things these flowers are supposed to mean." He shrugged and placed them on the counter beside the bed.

Stephen wasn't anywhere near an expert on flower meanings, but he was pretty sure that was not what thistles meant at all. "Who told you that?"

Tony nodded his head towards Wong, and Wong, bastard that he was, kept his face completely and utterly stoic. But the bastard had not only helped rescue him, but had also brought the cloak; the cloak had already swept past the group and circled Stephen before settling across the hospital bed.

In the background, Rhodey was checking something on his phone and shooting Wong a knowing look while Wanda and Vision remained wisely out of the whole flower conversation.

Stephen cleared his throat. "Right, well, thanks. Is everyone okay?"

"For the most part," Tony answered. "A couple nasty cuts, but nothing life-threatening. Worst part was probably whatever Sam was cursed with while pushing one of your guys out of the way."

"Minoru appreciates the gesture, but he shouldn't have done it," Wong said.

Rhodey made a face. "Did you see the size of that blue flamey thing coming at her? Sam can handle it."

"Sam's going to be in Kamar-Taj for the next week recovering from the side effects," Wong retorted.

"Sam could use a vacation," Vision said, speaking for the first time.

This conversation was getting a bit ridiculous. "Okay, I'm glad that for the most part no one was badly hurt," Stephen said. "I appreciate the news, but uh, I don't think I needed five of you to tell me that."

Wanda smiled. "We're here to see how you are doing, Doctor Strange. We were worried about you."

Oh. He paused as he processed that. He was ninety-five percent certain that it wasn't an illusion before, but now he was definitely certain because he didn't think either his mind would have come up with that, and the eldritch entity would definitely have not come up with the thistles.

That was a real relief. Though these people, some only acquaintances, wanting to see him at all he found a bit mind-boggling.

Tony boggled him further when he said, "And it's only five because even we have to listen to the doctors here when they say only five of us can visit at once."

Stephen slightly shook his head. "And, what, you five pushed yourselves to the front of the queue?"

"Hah," Tony retorted. "Vision could just phase through. But nah, they," he gestured to the other four, "were the real MVPs of that fight. Wong contacted us and got things going, of course. Rhodey got S.H.I.E.L.D. off Wong's back in the way he does best, Wanda's magic did something with the portal that I'm not even going to try to make sense of, and Vision figured out he could block people from being hit with those weird blue flamey things with his Mind Stone Version 2.0."

It wasn't anything resembling one of the Infinity Stones, of course, but that didn't stop Tony's ridiculous naming conventions. Stephen shot an amused look at Vision's expression, then asked the engineer, "And you?"

"Well, I brought you flowers, of course."

He snorted, then looked from him to Wong and Wanda. "Even if Tony doesn't want to know about Wanda's magic, I do. What happened?"

Wanda gestured to Wong to explain, and he answered, "From what I could tell, the portal was made from the elements of some sort of Chaos Magic, though those exact mechanisms I've not seen in our reality. It would have taken us some time to dismantle it, but as her magic branches from Chaos Magic as well, she was able to break it apart in something less than ten seconds."

Stephen saw the math; without that quick dismantling, he would have been gone before anyone had a chance to get to him. It was quite possible that the entity may have even been able to sustain the portal's opening once it was finished with him. "You saved my life," he told her.

She shook her head. "Oh, no, it was a group effort. There were many occultists there."

"No, what I mean is, the—" He swallowed at the memory, then pressed forward, "the thing was reaching for me when everything exploded in color and noise."

"The explosions were probably Tony and me," Rhodey admitted. "Sam too, come to think of it."

"They were very good distractions," Vision said.

"Regardless," Stephen continued, "It was reaching for me. The portal was far from it, but it had an endless— an endless uh, arm of some sort. If you had not disrupted the portal, it would have taken me maybe ten, fifteen seconds later."

A brief silence fell over the group. Wanda looked a bit stunned.

"So, uh, good timing on our part, then," Tony commented.

Stephen swallowed. "Yeah. Very good." He looked down at his hands and bandaged wrists, then at the cloak lying quietly and patiently. He didn't have his sling ring, of course, but now that Wong was here…

As he started to get out of bed, Rhodey said, "Hey, where are you going?"

He stared at the colonel. "Back with Wong? I don't have my sling ring so I needed to wait for him."

"The doctors want to keep you overnight," Tony pointed out.

Stephen rolled his eyes. "What, to monitor? I'm fine; see, blood pressure's back to normal, oxygen levels normal, heart rate normal. It was not nearly enough blood loss to worry about."

Wong gave him an even look. "You need rest and time to recover, Stephen."

"Yeah, and I can recover in my own bed or even the Kamar-Taj infirmary just as well as I can here."

"The moment you get back to either, you're going to immediately see how Mr Wilson's faring. We both know that the moment you see him, you'll throw yourself in study to see if you can help him recover faster."

"I—"

"Don't even try to argue that you wouldn't."

And now everyone else in the room was smirking in various degrees; even the android looked vaguely amused. Stephen frowned at all of them.

"Fine, I'll stay overnight for monitoring. But at sunrise, you— or anyone else from Kamar-Taj— need to come and pick me up."

"In the morning," was Wong's infuriating answer.

"Sunrise."

"Maybe after breakfast," Wong mused aloud.

Stephen glowered at him.

"Doctors really do make the worst patients," Tony quipped.

"I'm ready for the next group of well-wishers, now," was Stephen's answer. Tony laughed and made his way to the door. As the others followed him out, Stephen called, "Miss Maximoff?" She lingered at the door, and after the others left, he said, "Thank you. Truly."

She offered a small smile. "I am more than happy to help you, Doctor Strange. I know you would do the same for me."

"Stephen, please," he said. "I was actually hoping, if you would allow it, to study your magic further. I can offer you my own expertise, or any knowledge from the library at the New York Sanctum and most of Kamar-Taj, in return."

Her smile widened. "I think that could be of help to us both."

He inclined his head. "That is my thought as well. Chaos Magic is not heavily practiced in Kamar-Taj and it could be a valuable learning experience for us."

"And I know I could learn much from your order. I was amazed at the magics I saw performed yesterday by so many different people. I would love to."

"Great," he said, smiling.

Wanda nodded, then paused. "But only after you are fully recovered!"

Stephen groaned as she left the room with a chuckle.

#whumptober2019 #no.30 #recovery #doctor strange #stephen strange #tony stark #wong #james rhodes #vision #wanda maximoff #avengers fanfiction #doctor strange fanfic #clint barton #natasha romanoff

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mywildcrushes · 5 years ago

Text

Nsfw blaine debeers/fem!reader

18+ only

Content warnings: some elements of femdom, cunnilingus, vaginal fingering, unprotected sex

Disclaimer: ive seen like 3 episodes of izombie so forgive me if the characterization isnt spot on. I dont know how i managed to write this for a character i barely know, im just suuuuuper gay for him

[This is where the read more would go if i knew how to make one on mobile]

There he was, waiting on his knees, just like you'd told him, arms behind his back, in nothing but jeans and a belt. If you didn't feel sexy enough in the lingerie he'd picked out for you, the way he looked at you certainly would have done it for you. Not one to keep him waiting, you stood in front of him and began to strip slowly, watching as his eyes got hungrier and hugrier. When you were finally nude, you approached him and hooked one leg over his shoulder, petting his pretty pretty face and hair gently, and told him he could speak. And when he did open his mouth, my gosh, the filth that would spill out. Promises and threats of what he would do to you, how good he'd make you feel if you'd just let him touch you.

But no, he knew it was your turn to be in charge, and he knew to quiet himself when you press a single finger to his lips. He kissed it softly, absolute fire in his eyes when you take your other hand and pull his head toward your sex. Now that he finally has your permission, Blaine moved in leisurely, deliberately, sending a few hot puffs of air over your pussy to tease before he even touches you. When his lips make contact, you suck in a breath, and the feeling of his tongue spreading you open made it catch in your throat. His strokes are slow and measured at first, but before long it felt like he was devouring you from the inside out. You were barely able to handle the onslaught, legs trembling, your heel beginning to dig into his back. It just spurred him on further, showing no mercy til the leg supporting your weight started to give out, and he broke position only to catch you before you fell.

You giggled about it for a minute, and then he asked if he could continue. You nodded, and took his hands, pulling them up to your body so he'd know he could touch you all he wanted. And touch you he did, groping and dragging his palms, his fingertips slowly over your skin as he lowered his mouth back down over your cunt. The warm wetness of his expert tongue made you arch your back off the floor, winding the fingers of one hand into his blond hair. Blaine purred at the touch, and the sensation made you cum hard on his tongue. He had to hold your shaking thighs apart to lap up your juices.

When you came down from your high, still weakly moaning his name, you looked down at him staring up at you hungrily, licking his lips like a cat licking cream from its whiskers, sending another waves of tingles down to your throbbing cunt. You could only watch as he lowered his head again to place one last kiss on your sex before he started kissing his way back up your body, between your breasts he was palming softly, stopping in his path only to nibble some light bruises into the skin over your collarbone, amd thoroughly enjoying the breathy noises you made in response.

"Do you want me?" He murmured in a lust darkened voice as one of his hands drifted down, sliding two fingers through your soaked folds

"/Oh/," you moaned for him, squirming slightly. "Please, yes!"

"That's what i like to hear~" He grinned sexily, pupils blown with desire as he met your gaze. "Say my name." Blaine ordered as he stroked your slit, avoiding just where you wanted him most.

"Please, Blaine, please!" You begged, rocking your hips forward, trying to get him inside you. "I /need/ you to fuck me."

He chuckled and let his fingers penetrate you, drawing a gasp from your lips as they sank in fully.

"I bet you do~" He teased as he started working them in and out. His lips met your neck at the same time his thumb found your clit, and you let out a shuddering moan.

"Blaaaaine, please, it's not enough!" You begged and spread your legs wider, inviting him to just go on and fuck you already. But he didn't, not yet. He simply slid in a third finger alongside the other two, watching you as he did. Every twitch and shiver and shudder studied with a heated gaze as he made true on every promise threatened. Your breath hitched with every thrust of his hand, and each exhale came out in a moan. When you could feel yourself get wound tighter and tighter, he increased the pace of his fingers

"That's right sweetheart" He purred darkly against your throat, which he continued to nip, and kiss, and tongue. "Cum for me."

And on the next thrust you did just that, coming apart on his hand with a cry that was almost his name. Blaine fingerfucked you through it, wringing every last shudder from your body before finally releasing you. He made sure you'd picked up your head to watch him before sucking your cum off his fingers deliciously. You were still panting, looking up at him with heavily lidded eyes when he moved back on his heels to start undoing his belt.

He knew just how you liked it, and he only pulled down his pants and boxer briefs enough to free his impressive hard-on. Just the sight of it was enough to make you lick your lips in anticipation. With his hands still on his belt, you leaned up and wrapped your arms around his neck, crashing your lips to his. His hands found your body once again, and you pulled him on top of you as you layed back. You stayed like that a while, kissing passionately as he caressed your sides, til he pulled away breathlessly.

Supporting himself with one hand braced on the floor beside you, he lined himself up with your core, and with one slow thrust of his hips, he was buried to the hilt inside you. His girth surprised you as he filled you completely, and you threw your head back with a soft cry. Blaine took this as an invitation to attach his mouth to your neck, and started working on sucking a mark into the side of your throat, as he began to move his hips. In and out, over and over, rocking into you too slowly, so you wound your hands into his hair, tugging gently to spur him on. He took the hint, speeding up his thrusts til you were dizzy with pleasure. You felt him bite the tender spot he'd made on your skin, and you gasped sharply, feeling yourself tighten around his cock. Blaine groaned out loud and matched you by fucking harder through the resistence you'd given him.

"God, you're fucking /perfect/" he panted out, and you could only moan in response. He paused a moment to lift your legs so you could hitch them around his waist, and then he was back to his rhythm. Then, harder, faster, trying to make sure you were right there with him as he approached his peak.

And god were you. All you could do was babble and beg him to cum in you, digging your nails into his shoulders and tightening your legs around him.

"F-fuck, I'm-" was all he could get out before he was roaring his release into you with a growl. The sound of him cumming, the feeling of his warmth seeping into you, was enough to send you over the edge of your third orgasm that night.

His hands were like vices on your hips, holding you still on him until he was finished filling you, then he practically collapsed on top of you. You released your grip on his waist and let your legs fall to either side, breathing heavily and shivering from your climax. You laid there a while, still conjoined, regaining your senses. When you could again, you cupped his face, making him look at you for a moment before softly covering his lips with your own.

#blaine debeers #blaine debeers/reader #female!reader #reader/blaine debeers #izombie #izombie fanfic #izombie fanfiction #lemon

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1-800-yugyeom · 6 years ago

Note

could you write a blackpink female reader x rose smut in which rose is very dominant and jealous? thank you

ugh i love jealous doms anon why are you doing this to me i need to be studying.

listen i think we can all agree that rosé is BEAUTIFUL like her visuals are downright killer right and there’s not a thing that could make you want anybody but her

and she knows that. not only bc you’ve told her on several occasions, but also bc she knows how you look at her when you think she’s too preoccupied to notice ;)))))

and she also knows that you would never do anything to jeopardize your relationship and she trusts you 100%

but on the other hand.. she’s aware that you’re incredibly gorgeous as well, even more so in her opinion

and as much as she trusts you, she has a hard time trusting other ppl around you

bc at the end of the day you’re HER girl and she doesn’t want anyone to the idea in their head that you’ll ever ever be theirs

she tries her best to keep her jealousy at bay and to never take out her anger and frustration at other ppl on you

especially over something as trivial as a brief touch or a fleeting comment or a wink in your direction

but unfortunately sometimes there are occasions where the “harmless” flirting goes too far for rosé to just.. stand there and watch

she hates the feeling of jealousy. it washes over her in hot waves, making her stomach turn and acid form in the back of her throat in the shape of searing insults that are in no way tasteful, elegant, or roseanne-like.

and sometimes she can stand there and suppress her emotions, especially when you quickly brush the person off or very bluntly state something like “my girlfriend is sitting right there”

but sometimes you let things go too long for rosé’s liking, either out of obliviousness or just bc you’re too nice she’s not sure, but she doesn’t like it one bit

like when the two of you attend a party held by one of your close mutual friends on a random friday night

you’ve both been stressed from work all week so when rosé had managed to get out of the practice studio early enough

you decided to release your frustrations by drowning yourselves in alcohol and loud music.

you would have the rest of the weekend to cuddle and catch up on lost time that work took away from you, now was a chance to have some fun and let loose

except rosé couldn’t

not with the way she could see from afar, the woman standing next to you getting closer and closer with every passing second

this was the exact reason she had barely left your side the entire night. she just wanted to get the two of you some drinks to speed up the de-stressing process.

however it seemed like every time she left, someone took it as an open invitation to take her place

and she was tired of it.

tired but still very very angry

she felt the familiar tightness in her throat and burn behind her eyes as she watched the girl fiddle with the buttons on your red cardigan and check you out very openly

you had accepted a drink from her, you let her touch your arm

almost in a trance she continued to watch your interactions, unable to jump out of line and go to you or to run out of the house in angry tears

she watched the expressions on your face and found herself getting angrier and angrier, were you enjoying this? did you know she was watching and wanted her to suffer?

all the confidence she had in the fact that you only want her is crumbling fast and it’s being replaced by ugly doubt

meanwhile you’re trying ceaselessly to end the conversation with this very obviously drunk girl, which had started innocently enough

she had come up to you, saying that she could’ve sworn the two of you had met before and that she knew you

and instantly she looked vaguely familiar, until you realized that she was a past one night stand of yours from college

you immediately felt a cold pit open up in your stomach but despite this, you decided to play it safe and continued to be polite

even as hazy memories of a filled bar and a tiny dorm room resurfaced, instantly setting off warning bells in your head and making guilt brew in the pit of your stomach

you quickly came up with a half-true reply, “oh yeah, um, we took that psych class together a few semesters ago i think.”

from the look in her eyes.. she knew that you remembered more than just the class

“right! oh my god i can remember sticking pretty close to you because you did so well in that class,” she said, making sure to emphasize just how close you were by laying a hand on your arm.

from there she made the decision to move into more.. intimate territory

playing with the ends of your hair as she asks you if you came alone, what your plans were later tonight, if you could ditch them

all of which you answered honestly, not wanting her to think there was any gray area or possibly that you could recreate your night together

however she didn’t take the hint and rosie still wasn’t back yet

the girl had handed you a drink, which you now held but still hadn’t taken a drink of. it wasn’t the kind you liked.

not the kind you knew rosie was coming back with, you thought guiltily.

at the thought of rosie you began to scan the room to look for her coming back, not even noticing the other girl getting closer and closer to you

however she yanked your attention back when she took one of the buttons on your sweater between her fingers and complimented your fashion sense, all while she raked her eyes down your form fitting outfit

let’s just say you were thoroughly uncomfortable at this point

you choked out a quick “thanks” and took a few steps back, lifting up onto your tip-toes to look over the crowd for a familiar head of blonde hair

you feel the girl slide her hand down your stomach to your hip

which is when you spot the love of your life on the opposite end of room, standing by the drink table with steam coming out of her ears while she looks directly at you

your eyes meet and you can see it, the anger, the jealousy, the doubt

as much as you want to move forward, your feet stay rooted to your spot as you stare back at her with wide eyes

visibly furious, she stomped back over to where she had left you not even 5 minutes ago

if you wouldn’t let people know you were hers, then she would do it herself

and she wasn’t coming for you, no, she was walking straight towards the other girl

which is embarrassingly enough the first time you realized you were about to have a problem on your hands

throwing the other girl’s hand down and rushing to meet rosé halfway you grabbed both of her wrists, halting her movements

her skin was hot to the touch, face screwed up and cheeks red

she looked absolutely, terrifyingly beautiful

gently, you tried to coax her gaze from your admirer back to you, rubbing your thumb against her flushed cheek and guiding it towards you

“hey baby calm down okay? let’s just go home, will you please take me home?”

her eyes finally moved to your face and you watch her nostrils flare, her teeth grit together

and you realize she wasn’t just angry at the girl at the bar, she was angry at you too

the next thing you know her lips are being pressed roughly against yours in a searing kiss, no doubt intended to draw attention and show her possession over you

rosé doesn’t stop there however, pulling your body in flush against her and moving her hands from your waist to your ass, squeezing harshly

she kisses you with everything she has, showing you all the emotions flowing through her right now. it takes your breath away with how passionate it is, almost like she’s trying to prove something to you, something to everyone.

you pull away a minute later, unable to breathe from the intensity of the kiss. rosé is still staring at you with stormy eyes, just as angry as before but now you could tell with the way her pupils had dilated, also slightly turned on.

“hope that got the point across to your friend,” she said shortly before tugging you out the door and away from the party.

still pulling you by the arm, she makes a beeline straight for the car.

despite still being extremely angry, she still opens your car door for you, waiting patiently for you to climb in and then slamming it shut, making you wince.

she climbs into the driver’s side, quickly putting on her seatbelt and starting the car.

you look at her, reaching up to tuck a stray piece of hair behind her ear and taking a deep breath before opening your mouth.

“chae, i can explain-“

“i think you’ve done enough tonight,” she bit back, a displeased look still evident on her face.

luckily you see her cheeks started to cool down, her shoulders become more relaxed, and you know being inside the house was overwhelming her.

“i know you’re angry but we need to talk about this,” you try to say with a reassuring look, met with nothing but a frown and a cold glare.

“then talk,” she says.

sighing you take her hand back into your own, drawing little shapes on the back with your thumb while you think of what to say “she’s just someone i had a class with a long time ago”

“oh yeah because ex-classmates feel each other up and tug on each other’s clothes, right? you sure you didn’t know each other a little better than that?”

“okay, yeah?! so what?? we fucked. a long time ago, before i even knew you. but it’s not MY fucking fault that she didn’t get it the first OR second time i said i had a girlfriend and you were nowhere to be seen!”

you knew as soon as it came out of your mouth that would only make chae angrier. neither of you had ever mentioned past hookups or relationships for the other’s sanity. you knew it drove rosé crazy to hear you talk about anyone else.

but you had reached the end of your patience. you didn’t want to fight and the fact that chaeyoung wouldn’t listen when you told her the flirting was unsolicited only made you more desperate to get your point across.

“put on your seatbelt. now.” she said in a demanding tone.

“what the hell chaeyoung, i want to talk to you-“

“yeah well i’ve heard enough” she stated matter-of-factly.

“we’re going home baby, isn’t that what you wanted?” she said a moment later, tone more velvety and threatening.

this was the same voice she used when she told you beg, when she told you she was very displeased with your behavior and that you were to be punished now, when she told you to touch yourself for her-

the same voice she used when you were in for a long night.

the ride home was tense, the dominant aura coming off rosé in waves, letting you know that you didn’t stand a chance tonight and that excited you.

however you still felt the need to get everything solved before you got home, whether it was a good idea or not.

“rosie, please talk to me right now so i can figure out what you’re thinking,” you said softly, not wanting your voice to come off as a command. there would be nothing that she would hate more right now than feeling like she being given orders.

silence followed your request

you heard her suck in a deep breath, letting it back out shakily, and you feel the mood in the car shift

rosé pulls the car off onto the side of the road and just sits with her hands on the steering wheel before turning the key and everything goes painfully quiet until-

“you know what, who the fuck did that girl think she was.”

you jump in surprise at rosé’s sudden outburst, taken aback but still glad that she’s decided to open up her end of the conversation

“i don’t know, baby. i told her i came with you and that i wasn’t interested but she wouldn’t listen,” you explained calmly, desperate for her to understand that none of this happened bc of anything you did.

“you told her that?” she asks cautiously, almost like she can’t believe you tell people you’re taken, which was such a silly thought. you were so in love with her.

you nodded in response to her question.

“why wouldn’t i?”

you see rosé glance down at her hands, an unsure expression taking over her features.

“j-just.. you’re happy right? there’s nothing else anybody else could give you that would make you even consider-“

“absolutely not,” you say before she can finish her sentence. “and of course i’m happy, rosie. some random girl flirting with me at a party isn’t going to suddenly make me forget that.”

you watch her nod, still looking at her hands sitting in her lap, most likely gathering her thoughts.

slowly she looked up, locking eyes with you and staring at you hard, making you almost feel like she was staring past your eyes and straight into your soul.

“good. i’m not ever gonna let you forget how happy you are with me,” she said with the same dark tone from earlier, lips angling into a smirk, “starting now. go get in the backseat.”

your eyes widen comically, playing right into rosé’s desires. she wanted you to anticipate what was coming next.

“don’t make me repeat myself, babygirl,” she warned, rousing you enough to undo your seatbelt and open your door, complying with her orders in a way that you know will please her.

as you climb into the back, she continues to sit cooly in the front seat watching you through the mirror as you await her next orders

“strip down, baby. i want you completely naked when i come back there.”

with your cheek flushing, you slip your short red cardigan off your shoulders, placing it on the seat beside you.

you do the same with your back camisole and then kick off your sneakers, reaching down to undo the button and zipper on your skinny jeans. you do a very awkward shuffle out of them, almost having to rip them off with their combined tightness and the limited space you had to undress.

in your defense, you had imagined rosé taking them off you at the end of the night.

you catch rosé’s eyes in the mirror, the stupid smirk still on her lips and mirth dancing in her eyes, obviously amused by your struggle.

you pause when you reach your undergarments, starting to feel the oddness of being mostly naked and alone in the back while your girlfriend sat in the front, completely clothed.

“all the way. i’m not coming back until you’ve followed directions.”

wow, what an evil woman. how was this fair?

sighing, you swallow down your shame, unclasping your bra and throwing in into the front seat along with your panties a second later.

rosé picked up your underwear off the seat, inspecting how wet they undeniably had become from the minute she had kissed you back at the party.

“good girl. i can see you’re enjoying this, angel. do you want me to come back now and help you out?”

“yes please.” being polite has always gotten you far with rosé and you were practically ready to say anything at this point to get her in the back with you.

the next thing you know, the door to your right is being pulled open and the cool is nipping at your naked body, giving you goosebumps all over.

she gets comfortable, making you straddle her even though you’re at a high risk of hitting your head off the ceiling of the car. luckily you’re preoccupied craning your neck downwards to finally kiss rosé again.

her tongue pokes at the outside of your lips until you open your mouth and allow it to enter, the feeling of her tongue rubbing against yours enough to make you moan out loud

to your disappointment, rosé pulls away shortly after that, silently spinning you around to face the front seats.

she spreads your legs to hook around each of her own, experimentally stroking up and down your heat, listening to the little whines that fall from your lips.

you sit, completely naked, on rosé’s lap with your back against her chest as she starts to rub your clit slowly, watching you writhe and squirm in her lap.

“who’s girl are you?” she asks sternly, a desperate lilt at the end of her sentence like she’ll explode if you tell her what she wants to hear.

“yours rosie, i’m all yours, oh my god-“ you moan as her speed increases.

she keeps you at a medium, if not kinda slowly and teasing, pace until she pulls her fingers away from your clit completely.

you make a pathetic sound at the loss of stimulation, but let out a happy sigh when she finds your entrance, now wetter than ever.

if you’ve learned nothing else about sex with rosé over the years, you at least know that she loves teasing.

which you’re really hating right now as she slowly pumps one finger in and out of you, not even bottoming out. just pushing in enough for you to really feel it drag along the inside of your walls and then take it away a moment later

the hand that isn’t torturing you, she uses to roll your nipples under her pointer finger, sending a tingling sensation straight to your core.

“please, please chaeyoung, finger me properly i’ll do anything,” you pleaded, finally reaching your breaking point.

she giggled, pleased with your begging but amused that you cracked after such a short amount of time. how cute.

“okay honey bunny but only because you’ve been so good for me so far,” she said, landing a sweet kiss on the back of your shoulder and then trailing them up to lay several open mouth smooches against your neck.

you’d probably have marks in the morning, but wasn’t that half the fun?

finally having mercy, rosé slipped another finger in alongside the first, crooking them upwards before thrusting them in and out shallowly.

the crude sound of your wet pussy filled the car as rosé sped up her fingers, stroking your walls while she thrusted quickly

that combined with the wet sucking noises of rosé’s mouth on your neck and the noises you couldn’t help spilling out of your mouth

your lover could tell the second she hit your g-spot, not only from recognizing the different texture within, but from the way your hips canted upwards and a half-shriek half-moan left your mouth.

from then on she tried her best to thrust her fingers into it every time, trying to get you to cum as fast as possible

not that she didn’t like drawing out your orgasms, but her hand was cramping in the position and there was more you could do at home anyway.

as she continued her steady rough pace, she began to talk to you,making the coil in your tummy tighten even more and bringing you closer to cumming

“do you like it when i leave marks on your pretty skin while i finger fuck you baby?”

“oh my god you’re leaking all over my lap and the seat, so dirty. are you gonna cum for me? make it even dirtier?”

“c’mon baby don’t you wanna be a good girl for me? yeah? then cum around my fingers. just like this.”

vision momentarily blurring and a mini explosion happening in your body, you finally obey rosé’s orders, cumming hard.

you take a few moments to regain the feeling in your legs, panting heavily before rolling off rosé’s lap and onto the leather seat beside her.

rosé affectionately rubs your bare thigh as you stare at her, soaking up her pretty features and putting getting dressed and breaking the intimate moment off for a second more.

“you ready to go, baby?” your gf asks after a long moment, gathering up your clothes from where they’ve been thrown around the car.

“what about you?” you ask, realizing that you still hadn’t reciprocated.

“i can wait until we get home,” she giggled, kissing your forehead when you let out a relieved sigh, glad that you wouldn’t have to deal with even more muscle cramps from having sex in the back of your small car.

“i love you, rosé,” you said as you began to tug your clothing back on. “i love you more than anything.”

the smile you got in response was absolutely breathtaking, spreading across her face so perfectly and then her eyes into little crescents.

“i love you too, (y/n). more than you’ll ever know.”

#rosé.#rose blackpink #park chaeyoung #park chaeyoung imagines #park chaeyoung smut #blackpink imagines #blackpink fanfiction #blackpink x reader #blackpink smut #this is so bad oof #I also just realized I called rosie like a hundred different nicknames throughout this fhksfhd

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