#god i fucking cannot do this anymore

[justaboymadeofhoneyandglass]

and suddenly the words "I'm scared he'll actually hurt me" came out of my mouth. Which is funny, cus she'd never admit that he even scared her in the slightest.

[lazylittledragon]

what if i broke all the bones in your legs actually

[mayxo-hxh]

Im about to get controversial.

Out of chrollo, illumi and hisoka, hisoka is canonically the least likely to flirt to get anything he wants, if at all.

A lot of people think he's a natural flirt but I fear I couldn't have disagreed more. He only "flirted" a single time and that was solely to piss off machi, knowing she'd never agree. Hot take? He would've never asked if he knew she'd agree.

Also, bro's the biggest humanphobe in the anime. He keeps his distance from everyone. The only human physical contact he ever made was through fighting people. (If you're a person thats interested in seeing more evidence, I have an entire long thread about it on twitter that I do plan on posting here soon)

so u cannot give me 1 reason for hisoka to flirt with someone at a random bar but chrollo and illumi? i can think of a few.

chrollo, he already canonically flirts to get what he wants. straight up goes on dates gets a suit and shit. he has no reputation among the general public that hes concerned of that isnt the spider. Illumi? He's a manipulator. I HIGHLY doubt he never flirted to get something in his life from people who are too easy to win over. He's someone that wouldn't care what people think of him. He's also anonymous. People have no idea who tf he is anyways. If it affected the zoldyck reputation? Thats a different story.

Hisoka? he would fucking NEVER. Him specifically? HE HAS A REPUTATION. And whats that reputation? That hes an absolute disgusting freak that no one should dare to approach. He kills people. He fights live and makes sure the audience is always disgusted and weirded out by his actions and performances. You look at him and you should immediately look away and pray he hasn't seen you.

So riddle me this. If his entire shtick is making sure everyones afraid of him and avoids him, then why the hell would he get himself a reputation that makes him approachable????

Why would he get himself a reputation that makes you, as a person who only ever heard of him picking people up, want to approach him.

On top of that, I just.. don't see him picking random people up..??? random weaklings that dont even know nen????? he literally treats them like trash that inconveniences his time. You're saying he'd EVER give them the privilege of sleeping with him???

And then you'd say, oh so he'd sleep with strong people! HERES THE THING. Why would he sleep with them..... when he can fight them. Him getting off from fighting comes NOWHERE to actual sex. What people don't understand is that he gets off to killing people and seeing them crumble in front of him when they realize theyre going to die. Torturing people to death. What's... that got to do with like. yknow. actual sex bro 😭😭😭😭😭😭

this turned into a huge rant probably but do you know how genuinely depressing it is seeing a unique character like hisoka that gains lust through FIGHTING and KILLING reduced to. sex addict in fics. Like. be so fucking serious right now. He called himself a FIGHT ADDICT in the manga. Can I see more of him actually spending his time killing and fighting people instead of whatever the hell bros doing with a random npc.

Anyways this is also why I hc him as asexual/demisexual NEXTTTT

[superstar49]

i’m so fine and normal about this guys

[chocoloom]

Alright, the hyperfixation’s still kicking, so fuck it. Here’s the pokemon I think the Project Eden’s Garden characters would have or would turn into if they were Mystery Dungeon’d

Damon - Servine, Applin, Noibat

Kai - Togetic, Ribombee, Vivillon

Eloise - Swanna, Honedge, Farfetch’d (Galarian) or Sirfetch’d

Grace - Buneary, Jigglypuff, Spheal (golf ball lmao)

Wolfgang - Flaaffy, Wooloo, Herdier, Prinplup

Ingrid - Pyroar, Armarouge, Tinkaton

Toshiko - Spritzee, Fomantis, Flamigo, Roselia

Jett - Poochyena, Scrafty, Revavroom

Mark - Treecko, Whismur, Deino

Eva - Corvisquire, Mawile, Sneasel (normal or Hisuian)

Ulysses - Hoothoot, Elgyem, Claydol

Wenona - Teddiursa, Stufful, Pancham, Pawmo

Desmond - Wartortle, Poliwhirl, Dewott, Clauncher

Cassidy - Sizzlipede, Joltik, Dewpider, Scolipede

Jean - Dragonite, Druddigon, Charizard

Diana - Audino, (shiny) Furret, Galarian Ponyta, Minccino

[ratatatastic]

"smart fight by ekblad" and then zooming in on ekky in the box to forsy on the bench and going "forsys gonna be okay" oh we are fujoing out on main huh

[kugiscki]

sobbing thinking about nobamaki seeing each other for the first time post shibuya incident. after they hug nobara vaguely gestures at her missing eye and maki’s bandaged eye and remarks, “we make a pair.”

this causes maki to burst out into a fit of wet tears again. she can’t help but chuckle at the absurdity of their situation and how nobara manages to make light of it.

[iholli]

me when all my selfships are very popularly shipped with other characters (I hate canon sharing)

[thatcrimsonsun]

you know you've reached the limit of locking in when you want to kys 🫶🏼

[ahalliance]

how do i turn qantoine’s spontaneous marriage proposal to qetoiles into evidence of his early-days fear of qfrench drifing away and keeping secrets from one another

[jesse-pinko]

:))

[thelastsaiyanprincess]

i need a McFuckin break

[constantvariations]

Watching RWBY Chibi for the first time for this essay and I'm in absolute agony. Do people actually find this funny?

[vaguely-concerned]

I am so mad about how desperately into pan I am. he was specifically made to fuck me up. they dangled him in front of me like 'hey would you like to see a sad clown trickster with emotional intimacy issues and a heart of, if not gold, then some mysterious alloy with qualities not at all unlike those of gold at the end of the day?' and I went 'boy would I!' and now I'm lost. I'm on my knees he's like if reyes vidal was actually redeemable instead of just a 'release my man he did do all of that but I don't care' situation

[arundolyn]

ohhhh my fucking god nobody needs to like know any of this medical tmi but it is literally 11 pm and if im kept up one minute longer when i just laid down trying to go to sleep by my mother YELLING REPEATEDLY that she needs to pee. im going to actually go insane. she got a catheter in. Yesterday. it is working. she won't listen to anyone when they tell her that this is the case. help me jesus. im sure if a nurse comes to check on her tomorrow they'll probably get the same response. my brain will simply explode

[lord-of-the-bundle-of-sticks]

MY FACE HAS NEVER VEEN REDER I AM SI EMVARASSED IM GOING TO KILL MHSELF RIGHT NOW OH NY GOD I CANNOT