#god damn mary sues

[aq2003]

saccharina shooters it is so hard for us out here

[aromanticannibal]

read In Which Uraraka Ochako Decides to End The World NOW

[lith-myathar]

[character] x reader posts my beloathed

[hoshi-no-pops-05]

oh? so you have 1 or more """merry sue""" character(s) and you made them unironically that and wasn't made to fun of other people? you love you're oc you made out of love and happiness? you're probably the coolest person i've ever meet. lets be best fucking friends please <3

[anobsessedchocolatechip]

Okay Christine Daae is THE MOST UNJUSTIFIABLY OVERHATED CHARACTER IN MUSICAL HISTORY. THERE I SAID IT.

This VERY YOUNG WOMAN somewhere from 15-22 lost her father, the only person she ever had, at a young age and found her way of expressing grief through music. a MUCH OLDER MAN (we are not going to deny this fact please) saw her and decided to take advantage of that grief in order for her to fall in love with him (I know he had his reasons but it STILL HAPPENED) and after she found out how the man manipulated her she still understood why he did it, even after he KILLED PEOPLE she saw that he just wanted her love, and even after he threatened to KILL HER AND HER FIANCÉE for EXISTING (“now let it be war upon you both”) she was VERY smart and knew how to break the murderous trance that Erik was in, by showing him the one thing she knew he needed, compassion. She has the unique ability to see good in people when it’s not visible to anyone else, even after it seems like they’re past the point of ever being good again. That’s some LUKE SKYWALKER SHIT. She is literally a HEROINE who does not let anyone’s shit get to her, not raouls dumbass plan, not Erik’s anger. She wants to SING HER SONGS and she WILL, DAMN IT. Yes she’s naive sometimes but what did you want?? Her to be perfect?? Then you’d just call her a Mary Sue. Also she was a GRIEF STRICKEN YOUNG GIRL WITH FAITH IN THE WORLD OF COURSE SHE’D BELIEVE A NICE VOICE TEACHING HER TO SING AND BELIEVE IN HERSELF.

Christine Daae is a SMART, BRAVE, EMPATHETIC, ABSOLUTELY AMAZING CHARACTER AND IF I SEE ONE MORE PERSON BLAMING HER FOR *ANYTHING* THAT HAPPENED TO HER I AM GOING TO EXPLODE.

(Disclaimer: this is not an anti erik or anti raoul post, this is a PRO CHRISTINE DAAE POST) (GOD I LOVE HER)

Edit: Jesus some of you guys saw “this is not an anti Erik post” and said this sign can’t stop me because I can’t read 😇😍

Also if you hate Christine and feel the need to make that clear in the comments it will be deleted because this is a Christine positive blog and I will not allow mean people in my little corner of the internet where I share my little opinion with some cool little people who agree with it ❤️ shout out to all the people out there who disagree but didn’t feel the need to curse me out in the comments, I see you and appreciate you 😌

[olderthannetfic]

I feel like such a hypocrite reblogging all these posts about how people like male characters more than female ones even if they have similar personalities/roles/wtv, but I read about this stuff precisely because I relate to it. "People think everything men do is cool and everything women do is either weak or Mary Sue" -- yes, it's me, I'm people. It's not like I do it deliberately or I'm proud of it, but I can observe and acknowledge the empirical fact that female characters just produce a very different emotional reaction in me than male ones.

I guess I like the safe distance of projecting onto characters who 1. are more obviously not me and 2. are judged less harshly than me (bc everything men do is cool) and that's not my fault, it's the patriarchy's, but then I can't challenge it. I can't say "women can be just as cool and we shouldn't be judged more harshly", I can only say "yea women suck let me forget I am one" like I'm still in my 9gag nlog tween phase -- or well, I can *say* the former, but I keep *acting and feeling* like the latter. And btw I'm not just talking about consuming media, where all you can choose from is what's on offer; I'm also talking about creating my own fanfics, which are all about men.

--

The reason a lot of those posts are so obnoxious is that they're just people wallowing in guilt and projecting.

The fact is, lots of people do like female characters. There's plenty of fiction about women. There's plenty of fic about women. There is not, in fact, some grand, existential problem where nobody cares about the ladies. If you aren't seeing this fic or original media, that's different from it not existing.

Two, your own fanfics? FFS. If you consume media that is a sausagefest, then of fucking course, your fic will be about dudes.

Just the other day, I spotted a story I hadn't read by a fantastic fantasy novelist. I hadn't looked her up much beyond buying her trilogy, and what do you know: she actually says who she is in fandom openly!

I was entertained to find out that her big thing is kylux. You really wouldn't guess based on her pro work, which is about a harried female doctor taking care of supernatural patients. I remember those books being a refreshing change from my usual diet of nothing but slash fic. It's not just that there's a female lead but that they take a nuanced look at female characters.

Personally, as a writer, I wasn't ready to write much about women until I was better at writing overall, and my more self inserty characters aren't usually going to be women anyway unless they're like Julia from the Hilary Tamar series.

--

If you're uncomfortable with yourself, you can try to change, sure.

But fandom is full of this obnoxious plague where people think that it's the job of each person to make there be more female characters. This isn't necessary. Even if we want media or fic to be more balanced overall, it doesn't follow that each person needs to produce a balanced body of work.

Why should you in particular care about female characters?

--

But beyond all that, oh my fucking lord, I am so tired of that species of post that's like "Gosh, why is slash fandom, where people go to be horny over dudes and/or have self inserty feelings about them, not more full of stuff about ladies? It's so tragic how we all want to get rid of our boobs and wear men's clothing and be addressed as sir, just like all the other girls. What's up with that? It must be misogyny."

With a totally straight face.

Every god damn time.

[castielsparkle]

So fucking funny watching dean meet his maternal grandpa oh my fucking god. Hes like um. Im a hunter and i know this special yellow eyed demon and i know how to kill it with. yeah the colt yes its fucking real. This demon killed my fucking family it killed my mom. Also my dad could see into the future. I have to go now. And Samuel Campbell is like Jesus Fucking christ what a sparklewolf-esque mary sue this fairy is. Christ. What next hes gonna start saying he has some angel boyfriend from heaven. My goodness. Mary dont talk to this fucking guy his vibes are atrocious. whole time its his own damn grandson

[kyoukamybeloved]

« Chuuya-sama and Dazai-san stood side by side. Surprisingly enough, there was something similar to perfection about the two. »

« As if they are one soul in two different bodies. »

soukoku webweaves: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5

rule of wolves - Leigh Bardugo// harrow the ninth - Tamsyn Muir// the sorrow festival - Erin Slaughter// the prisoner - Octavio Paz// the final empire - Brandon Sanderson// wuthering heights - Emily Brontë// 21 - Gracie Abrams// slow like honey - Fiona Apple// Sue Zhao// art by @/57and13 on twitter// the dead man - Georges Bataille// Art by @creantzy// Frankfurt song - Marina Tsevetaeva// Lazarus, L. Munir// call me what you like - lovejoy// Crush - Richard Siken// art by @/ossukii// confessions - Elle Emerson// I wish you would - Taylor Swift// motion sickness - Phoebe Bridgers// art by @/ossukii on instagram// bittersweet - Rumi// Stigmata; love of the wolf - Marina Tsevetaeva// art by @/Zrainmtast on twitter// west wind - Mary Oliver// step on me - the cardigans// good looking - Suki Waterhouse// Letters from Medea - Salma Deera// valentine - Laufey// art by @/1110yu_ku_si on twitter// Amirae Garcia// the grudge - Olivia Rodrigo// The epic of Gilgamesh - Danny P. Jackson// art by @/Yuyii_Ju on twitter// he shifts from east to west - Margaret Atwood// happiness - Taylor Swift// afterglow - Taylor Swift// These hands, if not gods - Natalie Diaz// manga panel by Sango Harukawa// 100 love sonnets - Pablo Neruda// tis the damn season - Taylor Swift// it’s all futile! It’s all pointless! - lovejoy// All about love - bell hooks// art by @/FloreSuika// Germaine de Staël// 

tagging moots and users who seemed to lose their minds at the other web weaves, since this is probably the last part, thank you so much for all the love :)))

@philzokman @amagami-hime @nnavia @dinosaur-mayonnaise @zamxii @the-gayest-sky-kid @vinylbiohazard @bunglegaydogs @lotus-reblogs @ricelover888 @pendragonstar @slug-behaviour @ghostsinacoat @miltseyx @homuncvlus

[theno1joelhater]

AAAAAAAAA JUSTIN CASE UPDATE??? WHAT THE FUCK WHY DID HE JUST POST RHE SPOILERS TO THE NEXT INSTALLEMENT OF THE STROY RIGHT THERE INSREA DOF BEING LIKE YEAH IM DOING IT IM KILLING CAM RN FUCK ME (ron intended)

anywayssssss

nathaniel is dead, not very skibidi sigma of him at all but i’m not too surprised, cam’s been trying to get rid of ol’ nathan for a WHILE (besides, look at his last name. it was inevitable)

cam added a mary sue self insert oc that’s basically a god into the cgcu who’s summoned by racism and sexual jokes. damn.

i get the ending and it’s alright, but also seems anticlimactic. like cam shows up and tells justin “dude you’re a fictional made up character on the internet you’re already immortal 💀” and justin’s like “oh fr then ig i’ll stop” which isn’t that satisfying at all. i don’t like that ending the discord’s ending (ask me for an invite link if ur interested in the server, we’re all very cool) is much better since yk. it has actual character development.

personally? i don’t like this ending much and i am unsatisfied. it might be better if he actually posts it but i still don’t like it much. if only…….i finished the goddamn animation……..ughhh

also……….max? whipping it out? right there? cam you better film this part or else /hj

[miracles-and-butterflies]

[Reincarnation AU]

Luisa, scrolling through YouTube: I hate this. What do you mean “Isabela sings Surface Pressure” or “Camilo sings Waiting On a Miracle”? What the actual fuck?

Isabela: Lmao, I’d need your whole song to be higher for my soprano.

Luisa: Um, forget that, what about the fact you can’t relate to our specific traumas? You already have your own fucking song about your own trauma, why do you need mine?!?

Dolores: I completely agree with Luisa’s points. The songs were made specifically for each of you, not anyone else.

Mirabel: I too hate the fact that everything I have must be stolen from me. Thank God, I can sue people and have it taken down.

Mirabel: Jokes aside, we need to talk about the attention on male characters. Camilo has two minutes of screen time and zero plot relevance, yet is more beloved than the four of us combined. Why? Because he is male. The same case can be made for Bruno. Every female character in our film is completely villainised and any misstep is blown out of proportion. ‘Camilo’ singing our songs, being forced to fit our parts, is proof enough of that.

Mirabel: The erasure and hatred of female characters in this supposedly ‘modern feminist era’ is an actual joke - we had more feminism in our rural town in Colombia that was stuck in the 1890s! And that was before the feminist movement picked up traction. All this love for men, character or otherwise, drives me insane. I don't give a damn about Alexander Hamilton and his measly papers, where is the acknowledgment for Kateryn Parr as one of the first women to publish a book? Emily Davison is dumbed down to an idiot for what she did for the Suffragette movement, Mary Wollstonecraft's work for what became feminism is left unsaid, Simone de Beauvoir—

Dolores: Okay! That's enough history for today. Thank you, Mirabel.

Isabela, filming on her phone: No, let her keep going, Diane would love this

[canonically47]

so... those boxers, huh?

(click for better image quality!)

oh my GOD you guys @burrotello's AU is SOOO good!!!!!! the TADC fandom just has the best artists, every AU i've seen is so creative and fun and this one is an exception because IT'S. EVEN. BETTER.

i cannot express how much i love her artstyle and how much expression she can convey through her art.. so i'll just link the boxer AU masterpost here and let you guys see for yourselves!

for now, let's talk about the elephant in the room: toby and diane! you already know toby if you know me and/or my involvement in the TADC fandom - my OC, very strongly based on agent 47. diane is a new face, though, because she was created with the intention of being toby's handler! (she's based off diana burnwood, obviously.)

the duo and a description of their relationship:

some design notes:

toby is 150 cm (which is his height in the TADC universe as well), while diane towers over him at 187 cm.

since toby is based off a rubber duck, which is meant to be a gag, i decided to incorporate that into his defense - it's meant to act as a way for the opponent to be unable to see him, since he's so small.

his homing briefcase is his ultimate attack. it's a good thing there's not any water in the boxing ring, or we'd be seeing players drop dead left and right!

also to bounce off toby's duck self, diane is a fox because, well, she's a sly fox! she's based off diana even more than toby is off agent 47, because, while i take a lot of liberties with toby (make him swear more than 47, make him act wayyy more caring and open than he does in hitman), diane is literally almost the same. her wits, sarcasm, beauty, everything is kept in this awesome fox lady. (it was also my first time drawing an anthropomorphic fox, which was sooo fun! i did some warm-up, messy sketches too. i swear the furries are gonna claim me soon, drawing anthros is sooo fun you guys.)

toby's fighter name is "agent T" because i didn't want it to be THAT obvious by naming him 47, but... his HP speaks for itself. i know his stats just SCREAM "mary sue", so SUE ME. he's a damn good fighter!... if only the fight club was fair, then he'd get the proper compensation.

there are a lot of references sprayed throughout their descriptions that i haven't even begun to cover, including lines of dialogue. can you find them? 👀

bonus transparent pngs (featuring injured toby):

[bitchdafuqyousay]

i cannot stand you hoes

you fuckers will really just find any reason n excuse at all to hate on female characters, huh. like damned if she does damned if she doesn’t. they cannot win with you bitches smh

she’s upfront n emotional? ugh she’s so annoying she’s always in hysterics she needs to calm down. she’s levelheaded n even faced? god that woman is such a cold hearted bitch she doesn’t care about anyone she’s practically a villain! she’s got a temper? she’s always angry she’s so mean. she’s jovial all the time? she’s so annoying whys she always so happy it’s not realistic!! she’s super smart? she’s such a know it all she thinks she’s so clever n better than everyone else. she’s not a super genius? oh lord she’s sooo stupid what a ditz. she’s open n trusting? how can she be so naive n forwards she’s such an idiot! she’s reserved n keeps things to her chest? she’s so dishonest n a total snake i bet she’s secretly a villain!!

she’s super strong? she’s way too op it’s all just plot armor n makes no sense she needs to be knocked down a peg! she’s not as strong as the other (male) characters? god she’s useless she’s a total drag an absolute burden on the other characters!! she’s conventionally attractive n sexy? the over-sexualization is terrible she’s just pointless eye candy it’s annoying. she doesn’t meet conventional beauty standards? that bitch is so ugly haha look at the size of her forehead n her flat chest!

let’s not even get fucking started on the way y’all scream “villain” at any female character who isn’t a saintess of pure n unrestrained morality, but then throw a bitch fit about “mary sues” when another one is. female characters cannot do anything right in y’all’s eyes n you’ll take any chance to hop on them n drag em through the dirt by their necks. you hate a woman for the same qualities that make you love a man it’s pathetic.

[ktownshizzle]

Heeeyyyy, K!

OH. MY. GOD. Are you kidding me? Like, WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT ENDING?! L&L2 just pulled the rug out from under my feet, threw it over my head, and then proceeded to slap me with it. I’m unwell.

OH. OKAY. HOLD UP. Okay, okay, deep breath. Let’s rewind a little before my brain explodes. So, I read first (duh), and let me tell you, my heart was doing somersaults the whole time. Haneul? Ugh, that little ray of sunshine. I’d adopt him, and give him the world if I could.

L&L1, just pure, wholesome cuteness with a sprinkle of drama and a dash of Ugh, Yoongi, you’re so dense it’s painful. I mean, the whole misunderstanding with Namjoon? Priceless. Like, Yoongi really thought Namjoon was shooting his shot while Namjoon was basically gift-wrapping OC and tossing her Yoongi’s way. The audacity of the cluelessness was... 🤌🤌. Namjoon played Cupid in the most hilariously awkward way? PERFECTION.

But then—THEN—L&L2 dropped, and I was like, “Oh, this is going to be more fluff and cute little moments, right?” WRONG. I was giggling my way through the first half because Yoongi and OC? Their tension? THEIR FREAKING CHEMISTRY? It was killing me in the best way possible. And THE KISS. Oh. My. Gosh. I was screaming. Out loud. My neighbors probably think I’m unhinged now, but it’s fine. Worth it. That kiss alone had me doing laps around my room like an Olympic sprinter. My soul ascended. I wasn’t okay.

But then… THEN… you did THAT. That freaking bomb you dropped. I was SHOOKETH to my core. Baby mama entrance? Excuse me, WHAT? Who gave her permission to crash the party like that?! I mean, I get it, drama is necessary, blah blah blah, but COME ON. I wasn’t ready for it. My fragile little heart wasn’t ready for it. OC wasn’t even there yet—emotionally, I mean. Poor girl is still recovering from her past, and Yoongi’s out here being all sure about his feelings while she’s scared because HELLO, failed relationships leave scars. And now she’s gotta deal with this? With HER? I CAN’T.

Like, don’t get me wrong, I’m OBSESSED. I loved every second of it. But I also kind of want to fight you because now I have to sit here and wait for L&L3 while my brain spirals into every possible scenario. I NEED CLOSURE. Are they going to talk? Are they going to be okay? Is baby mama going to ruin everything? Does Haneul know how chaotic his dad’s life just got? These are the questions keeping me awake at night.

Anyway, long story short: I loved it. Every giggly, heart-melting, adorable moment of it. You’re amazing. This story is amazing. I love you (but I also hate you for the cliffhanger). Please stay healthy, take care, and WRITE FASTER(take your time) because I’m not okay over here. Okay, bye!

JAE!!!

Is the rug still assaulting you? You should sue.

Part 1- damn you're so accurate. joonie be out here giftwrapping MC and hand-delivering her to yoongi. lmao. tbh i did not expect that part to be so fluffy, but it just got away with me with all that domestic life.

Part 2 - the kiss!! i'm so glad it translated because i agonized over that scene! yoongi's marie claire look really altered my brain.

The ending - look, i'm sorry, ok. it had to be done. MC is still recovering from the wounds of her past, so she needs to focus on that, right? 🤐 and Yoongi, he's been such a good dad, he needs to do what is best for haneul, right? 🤐

Part 3 is really, really shaping up. I will say it will be longer (7-8k maybe???), definitely angstier, and I hope you love it, so much so that you will BERATE me again in my asks for it.

Love you!! 💜💜💜

Thank you thank you thank youuuuuu 🫂

[dangermousie]

W Two Worlds is a rare drama that is even better on rewatch because now you know where it's going, you catch so much additional stuff.

Knowing YJ is the original creator of Kang Chul doesn't just answer the question of how she can be transported into that world but turns the narrative, as I mentioned, into a fight between two creators (YJ and Dad) about the direction of the story.

And in a way, it has a lot to say about fandoms and creators' interactions with it and attitudes in general - it is not insignificant that it's the middle-aged man who wants this story to be all bleak existential despair and end in "there is no meaning" and it's coooool for there to be an unexpected ending even if said ending makes no narrative sense - he wants to go art house!!!! And it's a young woman who wants this to be a story about justice triumphant and love found and hope and happy ending.

It's very much reflecting reality where the latter is often looked down on as inferior (and resented for being more popular) and just "nonsense young women like" (think of the degree of vitriol at worst and contemptuous disdain at best genres and works and things hugely popular with women get.)

And how much do I love that it's the young woman's vision that ultimately triumphs? Heck, one can view YJ as a self-insert/Mary Sue character and the fact that she ends up with the protagonist she created is honestly such a delightful nod to so many fandom things - and also that is perhaps why she triumphs. Because she loves the character she created, not resents him the way Dad does, and an author who loves the character (and by that I mean enjoys that world, that story, the characters - not necessarily like YJ fancies them) will always win over one for whom the act of creation is a resentful chore with no joy. (Side note - by choosing to live on that bridge, KC actually did a good deed for the Dad too - Dad himself admits this gave him hope in a really dark time; maybe that is why W universe rebels when he tries to kill KC - because repaying that with death is unjust.)

Also, as @aysekira and I talked about, it's really a religious parable too - because Kang Chul's mortal sins, sins his creator thinks he should die for are disobedience (ever since that moment on the bridge, he goes his own way more than once) and self-awareness - think of the expulsion from Paradise in the Book of Genesis - the sins worthy of that weren't murder or maiming or anything in modern society viewed as horrible but disobedience and desire to know things. You don't listen to God is n1 sin in that world and so it is in the world of W. The God of Genesis would probably experience some degree of sympathy for the Dad and his decision.

Ultimately, how much do I love this drama? It's a take on creative process, death of the author, and relationships with media we consume. It's a religious parable about free will and a discussion of parental relationships. And it's also a damn good story with chases and make-outs. It's basically a perfect rebuke to Dad's belief that a story cannot be deep unless it's dreary. W has so many interesting things to say but it's also a mad amount of fun!

[fainthedcherry]

When I was a child in 2013, visiting Nickelodeon's site and finding a treasure-trove of Spongebob, Winx and TMNT flash games was like magic to me. BUT MAN. The TMNT flash games are one of the best ever to me I've played in my life. (on an aesthetic stand-point! Turtle Tactics and Dark Horizons are so awesome man, legendary flash games to me.)

Since I am utterly autistic about 4 green alien turtles and their rat dad...Here we are again. With me posting OC cringe 2016 me would've killed myself over :V (cry about it 11 yo/ me, afraid of cringe culture back then, it's DEAD NOW)

Gonna sneak-post my redo of that ancient drawing I did of Alex 2 years ago, for the base-post : D

2 years ago, I used flashpoint to replay it for the first time in years and I remember crying of glee LOL (I still play Dark Horizons and turtle tactis to this day btw). I played Dark Horizons and Turtle Tactics and also TMNT: Throw Back (NO I DID NOT NAME THIS LIKE A MEME THIS IS ITS NAME. I STILL BURST INTO LAUGHTER LIKE A CHILD OVER THE NAME AGING POORLY DUE TO INTERNET LINGO)

Those 2 flash games are just so...Technically advanced?? For its time?? LIKE A FULLY FLEDGED 3D FLASH GAME WITH UNITY ENGINE BASIS? DAMN. And then Dark Horizons? CHEF'S KISS I LOVE THAT GAME SO MUCH. AESTHETICALLY AND THE COMBAT FEELS RLLY NICE TO ME IMO, AND JUST...Everything about THAT flash game, god TIMELESS CLASSIC I COULD YAP ON FOR HOURS ABOUT THIS NO JOKE.

I am enthralled by the designs and art of Dark Horizons, it's why I made this drawing. The game just..Speaks to me on so many levels. IT'S JUST SO PLEASING TO SEE ALL THE ARTWORK I EXTRACTED. As far to my knowledge- it never got released, so I might make a post of just a few favourites I liked from the game. :D

I just wonder if I can post those in the first place, it's after all, not my artwork, from a flash game, and TMNT, so yeah, legal IP and stuff. I unfortunately don't know who the artist if of the flash games, but if I can find that out via googling or digging for credits in the game or the files, I'll see if I can credit them, so that posting will be fairly accredited!!

OH YEAH RIGHT ALSO QUICK BANTER ABT ART SORRY I AM VERY PASSIONATE ABOUT THOSE FLASH GAMES AS YOU CAN TELL,,,

I studied the in-game sprites for a good few hours back then, and did my best to replicate it to the best of my abilities!! I think Mushu maybe could've been done better looking back at it, but I think it was the best that I could do back then. :D Plus, I remember being really happy, excited and proud of this piece, as it reflected something, my childhood self always wanted: For Alex to like.."fake" being an official character LOL. I had sooo many dreams where Alex was hanging out with the turtles and Ninjago and throwing in Power Rangers for good measure, just...Everything I liked as a child, I somehow connected in my dreams via either "OH YEAH THE RAINBOW FAIRY!" or "OH YEAH SUDDENLY PORTAL AND MY MARY-SUES JUST BRAVE IT WHILST THE OFFICIAL CHARACTERS DRAMATICALLY TELL THEM NOT TO GO"

^I had vivid and....Creative dreams as a child to say the least, sometimes even Darth Vader and Eggman appeared as the bad guys, despite TMNT and Power Rangers and Ninjago w/ the snakes and lord Garmadon or however you spell him (I never checked + I'm German so ofc his name might be different in english)- I- do I have to go on about the dreams I FULLY remember I had, as a 6-9 yo/, until I told myself at 10 how embarassing my dreams are and stopped doing so? I DIGRESS. I..Need to be more professional in these, instead of such pure fandom trash oml, I feel bad for whoever actually has to read through my blatant autistic interests as a child and thinking "wtf is he on about" dfgklfdg

ANYWAY NEKST POST IS THE BASE. I SWEAR. SORRY I LOVE RAMBLING

[fortunatelychaoticphantom]

Yeah, so I finished Breaking Dawn.

General:

Holly shit. Holly fucking shit. Holly Jesus fucking Christ holly fucking hell god damn shit. THIS BOOK IS AMAZING.

I am serious. I am not being ironic or trying to be cool or contradictory or nothing. This book is absolutely batshit insanely fucking good. THIS IS GOOD FUCKING FANTASY.

Look. I've read and watched plenty of reevaluations of the series in the past couple of years, and I think we all know by now that it is far from perfect and there's a lot to criticize, but that the criticism and cultural uproar at the time was just pure misogyny and hatred to anything that girls like (a day will come when we talk about Justin Bieber and how the entire world decided its number one enemy was a 13 year old boy who wanted to be a pop singer and was beloved by 13 year old girls but it is not this day), and that Meyer is actually a very good world builder. This reread really solidified this for me, but even more so then before. I really do believe she is a good writer. NOT GREAT, but good. Until Breaking Dawn.

I am not joking when I tell you that this is one of the most incredible books I have ever read in my life. It is leaps and bounds better then any other book in the series. I think the other books are fine and enjoyable, they definitely don't hold the same charm over me as they did when I was 16, but they are absolutely entertaining and even truly touching (New Moon specifically). But this... this is just a different league altogether. This book is mature, and brutal, and aggressive, and disgusting, and horrifying, and reached fucked up territories that few writers dare to explore and I absolutely admire Meyer for this.

Part One - Bella:

It's a pretty short section of the book so there's not much to say about. It's sweet and fun but nothing much more.

Horny Bella is the best Bella. Get some girl.

Part two - Jacob:

Anyway, this right here is what brilliance is made of. I need to find a way to articulate it properly. It's the first time I have ever been so acutely aware of the narrator because the entire narration is in first person and so all the sections that are supposedly general descriptions are an active thought of Jacob that in almost every single moment are being experienced not just by me but by his pack(s) and by Edward and are commented on in the story. I don't even know how to explain just what an unbelievably wonderfully complexly imaginatively fucked up this is. Just. Amazing.

LEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

I'm okay I swear. But seriously. Leah's story is amazing as is, but it's the room Meyer gives her to be both filled with sorrow and with just pure spiteful rage. I love that she is not perfect, she is not currently nice, because she can't be nice, but a day will come when she might be better, be in a better place, and that's okay because we understand her. I just love her so much.

Speaking of which, I love the new bond between Rosalie and Bella but I also love that it's not entirely a good things? Like, there is a very clearly stated undertone that Rose cares more about the fetus than she does about Bella, and I just respect that? She isn't just magically sweet and kind, it's twisted and complicated and good storytelling (I forgot to mention in the Eclipse post Rosalie's backstory, but obviously that's also amazing).

Seth is also the most wonderful and pure cinnamon role in history and I will die for him.

6. this:

Leah: Mom dropped him a lot when he was a baby. Jacob: Oh his head, apparently. Leah: He used to gnaw on the crib bars, too. Jacob: Lead paint? Leah: Looks like it.

7. This section is just so fucking brutal. The physical toll of carrying the baby for Bella, Edward's agony, Jacob's suffering, Leah's everything, the coming attack from the wolves, the birth... Immaculate.

Part three - Bella:

If there was one Mary Sue I would stan, it was Bella. You're doing amazing sweetie!! You go and be an awesome newborn. We believe in you!!!

All the vampire descriptions are just so fucking good. The whole distractability, the way the new senses literally overwhelm you. I love it all.

You know what? I really don't mind the imprinting. Meyer goes to great lengths to say that it's in no way romantic. It's not the Greatest Thing, but, I mean, I'm reading a fantasy book... my suspension is very much suspending...

Jacob's being an ass again, only caring about what he wants, but it's only for like two chapters so it's fine.

I can't help but love the congregation of vampires, it's just so fun and interesting, and even though we spend so little time with them they are all so distinct.

It's a great showdown. I love it way more then I did the first time. I am still fond of the What-The-Fuck-They-Are-All-Dying???? scene from the movie, but it's intense even without it.

and this:

Garrett: If we live through this, I`ll follow you anywhere, woman. Kate: Now he tells me.

Good job all around. Now I need to go buy Midnight Sun.