#skk angst

[nori-draws-sometimes]

This really fits their dynamic imo, both emotionally and in terms of their abilities. or maybe I'm just a sucker for dazai being helplessly in awe of chuuya like the homo that he is

[kyoukamybeloved]

”In other words, the suicidal maniac wants to live. Is that it?”

“I’ve come to think it’s worth trying.”

"You used Corruption, believing in me? How beautiful."

skk webweaves: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5

//strange gods - Roxane Gay// the portrait of a lady - Henry James// art from @/_mwk19_ on Twitter// say yes to heaven - Lana del Rey// the grudge - Olivia Rodrigo// litany in which certain things are crossed out - Richard Siken// art from @/suya1414 on Twitter// Kyoto - Phoebe Bridgers// we’re in love - boygenius// writings prompts for the broken-hearted - Eden Robinson// anyway - Richard Siken// art from @/AB0to on Twitter// things I never give myself permission to say - Chelsea Dingman// art from @/ssmi_0215 on Twitter// the whetting of teeth - Jamaal May// no light, no light - Florence + the machine// cosmic love - Florence + the machine// letters to Felice - Franz Kafka// art from @/rokkyun1 on Twitter// the sorrow festival - Erin Slaughter// norman fucking rockwell - lana del rey// remember my name - mitski// art by @bananana2217// townie - mitski// misheard lyrics - car seat headrest// you couldn’t just leave - Trista Mateer// art from @/T__rate on Twitter// your love finds it’s way back - Sierra DeMulder// a pearl - mitski// humpty - mitski// art by @yuyonyu// abandon me - Melissa Febos// where did you go - Hishaam Siddiqi// I should hate you - Gracie Abrams// art from @/qmthtdy on Twitter// killer - Phoebe Bridgers// a poem for Haruko 10/29 - June Jordan// crush - Richard Siken// pandemonium - Lauren Oliver// art from @/1110yu_ku_si on Twitter// catalog of unabashed gratitude - Ross Gay// steamboat - Adrianne Lenker//

hey remember when I said last part would be the final one? yeah uh about that, turns out I still have some inspiration yippee. hope you liked it :)

tags:

@dinosaur-mayonnaise @philzokman @amagami-hime @nnavia @homuncvlus @vinylbiohazard @bunglegaydogs @zamxii @ghostsinacoat @slug-behaviour @vivid-vices @atsuwushi @gorotic @pendragonstar @ricelover888 @oatmilkbasic @thou-shalt-cha-cha-real-smooth @the-gayest-sky-kid @lotus-reblogs @whiteapplesandblackblood @dazaiyuri @evermorehypewoman

[little-blurry-stars5]

[yuyonyu]

Love that is bound to end in tragedy

[luneariann]

... chuuya and dazai except they keep doing shit for each other. neither ever acknowledges it. chuuya makes crab one night and almost has a breakdown before throwing it out the window. dazai's passing under and it lands on his head. stuff like that.

Sorry to twist your prompt a little! The angst took over me

[ravencincaide]

Responsibility to love 

Summary: After witnessing a difficult birth Dazai struggles with himself and his emotions over becoming a new parent- a distant dream that his mind denied up until now OR men react differently to seeing their babies for the first time; some are natural parents while others… 

Pairing: New parents! fem! Reader x  Dazai (x Chuuya)  

Inspired by Sweetober prompt 18: Sick 

Warnings: Angst,  Male postpartum depression including dislike and hesitant to accept the children,  Mention of difficult childbirth, cursing, 

There was a strange taste in his mouth; it wasn’t sweet like love or salty like disgust. It was a rather bitter flavor with just the tiniest hints of pungent somewhere in the back of his throat. A burning acidic kind which felt like it would corrode his neck- his vocal cords into mush if he said nothing. 

Yet no words came out.

He wanted to scream and yell, to call every doctor at this godforsaken place an incompetent delusional imbecile. He wanted to threaten them, see the cocky expression in their eyes slowly fade away into horror as he made their minds torture themselves into oblivion. Osamu Dazai  wanted to make them suffer unimaginable pain for lying to him, for calling this— this as good news. As everything being ‘better than expected’. Happy turn of events. Something to cheer and celebrate, not mourn and fret. The worst was over, they claimed in cheerful tones, now all that was left was letting nature and nurture run its natural course. And yet–

You looked so small, so frail. 

Resting his forehead against the glass that separated your room from the rest of the maternity ward, Dazai heaved a big sigh. The bitter, salty, sour sensation twisting the edges of his mouth down into a frown. This was suffocating. Disgusting at best. And yet— 

His eyes shifted to the orange haired idiot who looked like he was in seventh heaven. Chuuya was bouncing around your small hospital room in excitement. He was moving between your bed, muttering praises or stroking your hair with a gloved finger. Then over to the two bassinets just a few paces away. The joint construction which looked more like a plastic box on wheels with some blankets inside than a medical equipment there to monitor the newly born beings. The small wrapped up bundles. Bright red faces, white wrappings for the girl, blue for the boy. 

Dazai couldn’t help but think the newborns were ugly. They looked nothing like You, Chuuya or himself. Just red bunches of meat; alien looking creatures that were mostly bold and scrinkly with eyes that didn’t fit the rest of their features. The only semi positive thing he could say about them was that they had screamed loudly when they were born, yet now had enough self-preservation instinct to just be silent. 

He watched with a frown how Chuuya cooed and gawked at the babies for an awfully long amount of time, ignoring the way you looked. The worn out expression on your face, forehead sticky with sweat and the slight shiver of your body as you desperately tried to come to terms with the difficult birth.  You looked like you could use some water- something to snack on. A caring touch, a warm hand. Maybe a professional assessment, definitely some strong drugs. You looked so lonely and small, so tired that all Dazai wanted to do was go in there and scoop you up in his arms. Yet he was too cowardly; too ashamed and guilty to go back in there. Afraid that you’d read him like an open book; see all the emotion, all the turmoil and regret on his face. The lack of a smile, of happiness, on his being. And just see him for what he was; a man who desperately wished to go back in time and hammer into your younger selves to be more thorough with using protection. 

The pungent taste became stronger, almost unbearable. 

He watched with the same frown as Chuuya picked up the children one by one and brought them over to your bed. Watched the weak smile you’d give each twin, then a kiss on their foreheads- a task that seemed to take the very last of your energy as you leaned back against the pillows of your hospital bed. Dazai’s name was the last thing on your lips- he could read it even from this distance and his heart clenched painfully in his chest- before he saw you close your eyes.  In moments- seconds- your breathing became slower and deeper. Dazai didn’t know whether you fell asleep or actually passed out. And it almost amazed him how little Chuuya seemed to care about your condition; giving you a single kiss on your hair before moving away. Not checking your pulse, not checking your breathing and just trusting that the instruments monitoring you worked. 

The ginger's focus and attention was clearly elsewhere. 

Dazai observed Chuuya closely as if he were a strange animal and not the reflection of how he himself should be behaving; the bright smile, the energy and excitement all over as Chuuya rocked the twins in his arms seemingly unable to get enough of them. That was how he was supposed to act- to be in there right beside Chuuya bickering over who got to hold which twin. To be joyful and grateful and so utterly in love and yet-

Dazai prayed that those balls of red meat were Chuuya’s- prayed that they didn’t come from his seed. He didn’t think he’d be able to live with himself if he had hurt you this way- that something that came from him put you in such a dire state. That something from him almost tore you away from this world. He selfishly prayed that he was not at fault, even if he knew deep down that he was. And if you had died- then your blood would have been on his hands as if he’d killed you himself.  

Dazai swallowed thickly, the taste in his mouth unbearable. He felt somewhere between crying, throwing up, and passing out. Yet his body was frozen in place, forehead against the glass window, staring at the sight inside. Silently suffering- definitely hating himself. He watched helplessly as Chuuya finally took notice of him and strolled up to the door that separated Dazai from his partners. The flimsy door that kept the ungrateful monster at bay. 

The click of the lock before he opened it was more deafening and humiliating to Dazai than forgetting to cock a glock. 

“ Heeh bandages don’t you wanna hold him?” Chuuya stretched out the infant towards Dazai, still wearing that stupid shit-eating-grin on his face. 

He didn’t. By god he didn’t. Dazai didn’t want to touch anything that almost cost you your life. He didn’t want to get close to it. He didn’t want to be near it. 

Still he held out his shaking bandaged hands which Chuuya adjusted before placing the small thing into them. A part of Dazai was surprised how heavy the infant was. Especially since it was so frail. It would take very little for him to harm this small thing in his arms. To smoosh it into nothingness. Like a bug.

Dazai brought the infant closer to himself, running his eyes over every inch of him. Trying desperately to find something likable about this clump of cells, wrapped in bones and flesh that you almost died for. That made Chuuya so happy. 

After all, it was his responsibility to love it.

Authors Note: For those of you who have read "Desperate times call for Desperate measures" This is very loosely connected to it. And although that fic has a more traditional post-partum depression element to it, this fic is more focused on the male side of becoming a parent. While doing research I realized how little the male PPD was discussed so here we are now. Think of this work as a prequel if you like. ... damn now I feel almost sorry for them...

Anyhow hope you enjoyed! If you liked my works feel free to check out Raven's Masterlist

Until next time~

[calmlb]

one of my favorite headcanons is that Dazai defected right around Chuuya’s birthday

we don’t know exactly when he left, but we do know it was after october 26 & before june 19, & according to clues in dark era it sounded like it was around springtime in yokohama

idk enough about yokohama weather to know exactly what month it was but imagine��

Chuuya had been sent on a mission in the west for 6 weeks. he returned late in the afternoon on April 28th– just in time to ring in his 19th birthday with his shitty partner.

because why not? he’s got nothing better to do.

he’s even got a bottle of 1989 Petrus waiting to be popped open.

he reports to Mori for debriefing & all he can think about is how beating the mackerel in that racing game they’ve been playing while he was away would be the perfect way to start off his 19th year.

but when he turns to leave, the Boss stops him, telling him there’s something that he should know…

Dazai disappeared 2 weeks ago, & has now been declared a traitor to the mafia.

Chuuya’s blood runs cold. he doesn’t know how he made it back to his apartment— head muddled by hurt. shock. confusion. exhaustion.

he tosses his coat on the back of the couch & the first thing he sees is the bottle of vintage Petrus— still waiting for the celebration.

and celebrate he did.

Chuuya celebrated his liberation from that waste of bandages he called a partner.

he celebrated the success of the solo mission he’d just returned from.

he celebrated the end of the reign of the infamous double black.

he celebrated the fact that he’d survived 4 years of partnership with that shitty Dazai.

he celebrated Dazai’s freedom, which would likely save his life… the freedom Chuuya hadn’t been able to attain. he’d been left behind in the darkness by the one person who got it.

the one who believed in & fought for Chuuya’s humanity when no one else did.

Chuuya celebrated his 19th birthday. alone. again.

(he hadn’t even said goodbye— hadn’t asked Chuuya to come with hi-)

no.

Chuuya shook away those thoughts. he needed to clear his head. he wiped the back of his hand across his eyes & stumbled drunkenly across the room to grab his keys.

he made his way to the garage where his car was parked, clicking the button to unlock it as he approac-

BOOM!

Chuuya was thrown backwards onto his ass, barely able to catch himself in his drunken stupor. he blinked through bleary vision at the flames that were engulfing his car.

and wasn’t that just par for the course? the icing on his nonexistent birthday cake.

so much for that drive.

Chuuya watched the flames burn, & maybe it was the alcohol talking, but it felt almost symbolic— like closing this chapter of his life. all he could do now was move forward. just like he always did.

but not tonight.

tonight he would stumble back to his apartment & collapse into bed.

(in his inebriation, he hadn’t even noticed the black fabric burning up right along with his car)

he woke up the next morning, freshly 19 with a killer hangover, a smoldering car, & a missing ex-partner.

when he found the nearly empty wine bottle, he was kind of glad he hadn’t taken that drive…though his memory from last night was a bit fuzzy— what the hell had happened to his car?

his phone chimed with a text from Kouyou.

happy birthday, lad. don’t do anything stupid.

Chuuya couldn’t help the twitch of his lips. there were still people here who cared about him.

not long after this, he would be promoted to executive & decide that the Port Mafia was his family.

but for today, he would nurse his hangover & curse a certain mackerel’s name as he beat every high score between them in that stupid racing game.

happy freaking birthday to him.

the car bombing was inspired by this post bc it’s canon to me <3

[tinyperson00]

total time: 3 hours, 4 minutes

Yea… Sorry in advance ;-;

Sometimes my brain just formulates really like ‘deep’ quotes for no apparent reason- this was one of them lol

don’t kill me for making this!!!! 🙏

tagging: @kimetsu-chan @zenitsustherapist @saffron0v0 @exymybeloved @a-stray-wretched-dog

[sleepibugg]

Tried doodling angst I have no idea what I'm doing..

Also I tried making a skk playlist .. ithink it's pretty neat 🥺

[therosebookshop]

Why'd You Only Call Me When You're High?

͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙·͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙

Warnings: Angst angst angst, I slapped this together before I lost motivation, homosexuals in denial of their homosexuality, skk, Dazai (man's a warning in himself istg), alcohol intake, third person but with Chuuya's thoughts so sort of first person, slightly ooc because I suck at writing fully in character, no spellcheck because I fix my writing mistakes the first time 😎, swearing,

AN: @nugget-child is the demon who requested this- my first ever request RAAAAAAH, I’m reposting this on my new account :3

It's short er then chuuya but I like it

Song: Why’d You Only Call Me When You’re High by Arctic Monkeys

͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙·͙⁺˚•��̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙

It was three am when Chuuya's phone started ringing.

He didn't have to roll over to know who was calling him. Only one person ever called him at three in the morning, when anybody sane should be asleep. It happened every week, sometimes twice a week. Sometimes more.

Sometimes he wondered why he continued to pick up the phone.

It did him no good.

It only made it all hurt more.

Still, he stretched his arm over and picked up the phone, sliding the answer call button up and pressing the phone to his ear. Immediately was the annoying voice of the person he loved hated the most.

"𝘊𝘩𝘶𝘶𝘶𝘶𝘶𝘶𝘺𝘢𝘢𝘢𝘢𝘢~" Dazai slurred. "𝘕𝘦𝘦𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵' 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘳𝘳𝘳~~"

Chuuya wanted to say no. Dazai was the enemy now, a traitor of the Port Mafia. He should just ignore him, let him deal with the consequences of his actions alone.

But he never could make himself say no.

"I'll be right over."

He hung up the phone and dressed, grabbing his motorcycle keys and his wallet and setting off. The streets of Yokohama were mostly deserted at this time, and he made it to Dazai's apartment quickly, parking his red motorcycle in the parking lot and killing the engine.

He paused for a moment, not getting off his bike. Why did he do this? Dazai could've called any of the people he worked with. So why did he have to call Chuuya, his old partner? They hated each other. They always had, ever since Chuuya first joined. He'd never wanted to like Dazai. He was a stupid, selfish, suicidal prick.

Yet he still got off his bike and tromped up the steps to the apartment and knocked on the door. "Mackerel. Let me in."

Silence. No shuffling, no swearing, nothing. With a frustrated sigh, Chuuya tried the doorknob. The door swung open easily.

The apartment was a mess. Clothes, alcohol bottles, and loose bandages were strewn about. This was how it looked every time. Sometimes he wondered if Dazai knew the meaning of the word 'picking up after yourself'.

Speak of the devil, there was the shithead himself, laying slumped on the battered couch, a half-empty bottle of whiskey in one hand and his phone in the other. As soon as the door opened, his eyes focused on Chuuya.

"𝘊𝘩𝘪𝘪𝘪𝘪𝘪𝘣𝘪𝘪𝘪𝘪𝘪~" He slurred, raising his arms. Bandages trailed from his limbs, unraveling, and patches of pale skin, covered in silvery scars, showed. "𝘊𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘪𝘪𝘪𝘪𝘪𝘵.... 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘢 𝘥𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘬𝘬𝘬𝘬, 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘥𝘢𝘺𝘴, 𝘺𝘢𝘢𝘢𝘩~?"

Chuuya hated Dazai. He really did.

He cleaned up the clothes, and the bandages, and the alcohol bottles. He wrestled the bottle of whiskey from Dazai's hand and undid all the bandages from his body- arms, legs, torso, neck- and forced him to put some pajamas on. And he waited for him to fall asleep before he left, locking the door behind him with the key he kept on his keychain.

But he always came back.

[flamie-42]

I want out…

Soukoku (Dazai x Chuuya) - alternate Beast AU

Tags: slight angst with a happy ending, NO MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH (I promise), fluff, cannon typical suicidal ideation from Dazai, nothing more graphic than the cannon, Dazai and Chuuya being stupidly in love

Content Warnings: slight gore, suicidal ideation, typical Dazai CWs,

A little skk mini fic, while I gain the mental capacity to update my actual fics

Dazai is tired.

Every morning he wakes up. Goes to a meeting. The meeting is boring. Someone probably died. Or supplies aren’t getting past law enforcement. Or someone is mad at him. He can’t really bring himself to himself to care.

No one has noticed this shift in his attitude, to them the boss has always been a cold piece of shit with no emotion. “The demon prodigy is as cold as ice” he hears whispers in the halls of the Port Mafia building. He doesn’t bother to try and change his way, they are mostly correct.

Mostly…

Osamu sighs as he opens the door to his penthouse suite. He would have rather just slept in his office if it wasn’t for a certain … someone.

“Osamu you’re fucking late!” A familiar voice calls from the kitchen. He sighs as the cold mask he is so tired of falls off in the comfort of the warm inviting suite.

Most of the Mafia assumes that a man like him lives in a dark cold flat. That he only sleeps and eats there. Little do they know that the lively ginger that remains at his side most days lives there too, brining his noise and color.

A flurry of reds envelops him as he sheds his coat and tight suite shirt. The smell of spice and wine takes over his senses as he melts into Chuuya’s arms.

“Long day, huh” his partner only slightly mocks him as he leads the exhausted man into the kitchen.

“I don’t know how you’re not, Chuu” osamu sighs as he collapses onto a stool to watch his love cook. Long ago Chuuya had taken on the job of cooking for the both of them. One, so Dazai would eat and two, so he wouldn’t burn down their place. Now he was cooking up some ramen for the two of them.

“I’m not running the whole operation, I just gotta follow orders” Chuuya winks at his boss as he serves up the food.

“We both know how much you *love* following orders” Osamu smirks at his partner as the redhead laughs deeply.

Later as they lay in bed, limbs tangled together, Osamu sighs deeply and quietly states,

“I want out, Chuu”

It wasn’t a question, just a soft firm statement shared between lovers.

“You sure?” The sleepy response came from the redhead.

“Absolutely”

“Tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow.”

Chuuya pulled him closer and softly kissed his hair, knowing he wouldn’t be able to do that for a long time.

Atsushi walked into his Boss’ office for the early morning meeting they had scheduled. The office was empty but Atsushi assumed the man would be in soon enough. After a few minutes without the dark haired man arriving he noticed a letter on the desk with his name scrawled on the front.

Atsushi,

I’m sorry it had to happen like this, you know how the mafia is about deserters. Hirotsu will take over in my stead and Kouyou and you will be his seconds.

You’ll do great.

The weretiger looked terrified at his partner who was standing quietly behind him. A commotion drew their attention to the large windows in time to see a flash of black and red falling.

Reaching the ground floor they were in time to hear the rumble of gravity breaking concrete. This only confirmed the suspicions of the two. As they walked out the front doors of the Mori Corp. they were just in time to see the red headed exectutive collapse the sidewalk.

It had been a long suspicion that the boss and his prized executive had a relationship more intimate than the partners they claims to be, though no one dared voice those rumors. Both members of Double Black were ruthless and violent if provoked. Though in most eyes the display in front of their eyes confirmed how close the duo was.

Red markings creep onto Chuuyas skin as he feels the weight of gravity bend to his will. The concrete he stands on cracks and buckles. Rebar screeches and snaps as immeasurable stress is placed upon it. His eyes blur as he sees the body beneath him, laying much too still.

The body is mangled and bloody, its dark coat crumpled as it hit the pavement. But what hit Chuuya the hardest was the scarf. The blood red scarf that Chuuya has given Dazai so many years ago.

It was a cold night when Chuuya had gotten a call from his new partner to meet on the roof of the skyscraper the Mafia called home.

On that rooftop the two of them had made a pact to remain loyal to eachother, above all else.

Dazai had given him the leather choker that still lay on his neck. A “collar for my faithful dog” the brunette had said. And despite chuuyas chagrin he had been a faithful dog to Dazai since that day. Not that Osamu had made him do anything he would have protested (much) to.

In return Chuuya had given him a blood red scarf that adorned his bandaged neck since that day. “A reminder of your job” Chuuya had said bitterly, referring to Corruption. But since that day Osamu had always been there to bring him back.

The concrete finally collapsed and Chuuya floated down with the rubble. Each progressive story of the underground the gravity punched through. Corruption had fully taken over Chuuyas body and there was no stopping it…not anymore.

He knew what people would say, the rumors he had confirmed by this but he didn’t care anymore. There was no point to continue like this, without him there.

His consciousness fell away until there was only red, Arahabiki fully taking over his mind and body until Chuuya was shut in a little corner.

He sat in an empty room, looking through his own eyes and watching the chaos that the god inside him was inflicting on the world. It appeared Arahabiki wanted to take both him and the body beneath them to a deep grave where no one would find them.

We must be deep at this point

I wonder how much father we need to go

Arahabiki will find him

The windows closed and the room fell dark around him. Chuuya laid down and closed his eyes, simply waiting.

And waiting…

And waiting…

And finally a soft blue light enveloped the room. It was a comforting, familiar light. He had felt it many times before… and at this point it felt like home.

Chuuya opened his eyes, his real eyes, and saw a pair of bright brown eyes waiting for him. A hand held his cheek tenderly.

“Did you have a fun time princess” Osamu’s mocking tone flowed into his ears.

“You asshole, you put your scarf on the body” Chuuyas bit back, his voice rasping.

“I thought it would sell it more” Osamu had now picked up Chuuya, who was in no condition to walk, and began to walk towards a tunnel that was poking into the hole they stood in.

“Asshole” came a quiet response from the redhead.

“Sorry Chuu” he whispered back, he knew Chuuya had a much harder role in this to play but he did it beautifully as always.

Chuuya awoke in a soft, clean smelling bed. He stretched, feeling his bones pop as he looked around him.

Dazai sat a few feet away, drinking something and looking out the open door of a shipping container. Beyond him was the vast blue ocean, now a new shade of teal that he knew belonged to the tropics of Oceania.

He stood up and stumbled over to his partner who looked up at him, a happy smile plastered on his face. Chuuya had waited years to see that smile grace his lips again.

“Welcome to our new life, love” Osamu whispered as he pressed a kiss to Chuuya’s lips.

“Thank goodness it worked” Chuuya slumped into his arms, body still exhausted.

“You should have seen the explosion! It was magnificent” Osamu smiled as he wrapped his arms around the redhead. “Could have fooled me that Arahabiki imploded deep underground”

So everything had gone to plan

The mafia would think them dead and they could live out their lives, far away from the violence and destruction.

Just them on an island Dazai had bought years ago and spent days untying it from both their names.

“I think you should go blonde” Chuuya mumbled, combing his fingers through his partners hair

“Only if you go brunette” came the laughing response

[nori-draws-sometimes]

beast angst beast angst beast angst (i haven't even read it yet)

[kyoukamybeloved]

“Such a shallow bond.”

for more soukoku web weaves

creds:

epithalamium - Louise Glück// art by @xieliancore // annunciation - Marie Howe// cowboy like me - Taylor Swift// queen of peace - Florence+the machine// from a classic greek play but i can’t remember which one// deathless - Catherynne M. Valente// art by @iztea // the dive from Clausen’s pier - Ann Packer// sad beautiful tragic - Taylor Swift// free - Florence+the machine// madness love// art by @muaviinu // unkown// never love an anchor - the crane wives// blinding - florence+the machine// wayward son - Rainbow Rowell// free - florence+the machine// ivy - Taylor Swift// p.d vulpe// art by @nittkach44 // sharp objects - Gillian Flynn// art by @dersacerj // by zee on medium// suburban legends - Taylor Swift// the crooked the craddle - the crane wives// art by @iztea// planet of love - Richard Siken// heavy in your arms - florence+the machine// i almost do - Taylor Swift// r.m drake// art by @twilicidity // bloodsport - Yves Olade// art by @yomeiu // p.d. vulpe// the moon will sing - the crane wives// anti-hero - Taylor Swift// the flesh i burned - Ritika Jyala// art by @nittkach44// cat’s eye - Margaret Atwood//shake it out - florence+the machine// anti-hero - Taylor Swift// grace - florence+the machine// art by @venusgoose // the secret diary of laura palmer - Jennifer Lynch//

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[nonexistence1199]

A place where seasons never change

Soukoku - Beast AU!

Warning: Angst, mention of death, hallucination

Currently playing: Heads in the clouds - Hayd + Memories at the end of the world - AZALI

Author's note: Could anyone happen to know the artist of the fanart above?! Please tell me I wanna worship their talent oh my god (っ °Д °;)っ And thus, this whole thing.... maybe it's just about flashbacks fr:v

[...]

-"Chibi~!"

A voice rang through the Port Mafia's hallway, a certain brunette drag his annoying ass to "accidentally" hit the short ginger, who was caught off guard and stumbled a bit.

-"Tch, get back here, you annoying waste of bandage-!"

The shorter male growls, quickly chasing after him. Who else could it be? Yes, the "certain brunette" is Dazai Osamu, his annoying partner in crime- no, more like rivals in crime.

-"Awww, our little Chuuya is extra grumpy today~ Poor you, that grimaced face makes you look like a thirty-year-old man, you know that?"

With a flicker of wind, Chuuya feels something lifting off his head. He quickly looks around - the front door is open, and… Wait, what?!

-"Damn you, Dazai!!"

Running towards the open door, Chuuya rushes through the garden in the backyard. Successfully grabbed Dazai's coat to pull him back, the bandaged boy let out a playful squeal.

-"Woah, no need to be so harsh, Chuu Chuu~"

Chuuya rolls his eyes at the other's giggles, covering his messy red hair with the Fedora which is now back on his head. A sudden pull on his arm from his supposed "rival" caught Chuuya off guard, and his eyes went wide for a second.

-"What the hell you think you're doing, huh?"

-"Ahhhh, enjoying life! Today's quite a beautiful day don't ya think?"

Chuuya almost did a double take when he heard the words coming out of his partner's mouth. Is he serious? This suicidal bastard, enjoying life?

-"And I'm not in the mood to do a little "experiment" about death today…"

At this point, Chuuya had choked on the air.

-"No, are you okay? You, mackerel, won't try to commit suicide? Not in the mood?"

The ginger-haired boy was dumbfounded, even when Dazai dragged him by his arm out of the building towards the small secluded garden.

And Chuuya's eyes twitched slightly when the other started rambling with his signature smug smile.

[...]

The crystal sky turns grey. A summer rain crashes by, causing Chuuya to pull out his black umbrella. The messy bangs are even messier because of the wind from before, and he start walking down the street.

It has been exactly 1 year 9 months 6 days since the day he lost his most regretful bet.

The cold and wet drops of rain, the sound of them hitting the hard ground, were once soothing for him. It once felt warm. And there was once someone who stayed by his side, wrapping his coat around him with a teasing smirk plastered on his stupid face.

Chocolate eyes, and the way his pain-in-the-ass laughter echoes in the air whenever Chuuya was tricked.

And the Port Mafia executive wonders, where is that certain someone now?

[...]

-"...Dazai, so you're here?"

Chuuya frown, crossing his arms as he gaze down his so-called "boss". Dazai Osamu, now he is the godamn boss of the mafia.

It is funny, but it really is.

But it is still ironic, considering Dazai has just discreetly sneaked out from work again.

-"Get back to work, you idiot"

With that, Dazai whine like a child. The poor executive gasped slightly when the Port Mafia boss pulled him down on the grass, and with a soft "thud", his back landed on the ground with Dazai on top of him, his usual stupid grin makes Chuuya's veins pop up.

-"Get off me, you idiot!" he snapped, trying to push the other man away. Dazai just laughed, the sound light and carefree, not caring in the slightest about Chuuya's irritation.

-“Come on, Chuuya! It’s a beautiful day!” Dazai exclaimed, propping himself up on his elbows and looking down at him with those infuriatingly charming eyes. - “Why so serious?”

Chuuya's face flushed a deep shade of red, half from anger and half from the ridiculousness of the situation.

-“You’re such a pain”

Dazai tilted his head, still grinning.

-“But you love it. Admit it!” “Love it?” Chuuya scoffed, trying to maintain his tough facade.

-“I can't stand you!” “Oh, so you do love me!” Dazai winked, clearly enjoying the banter.

-“Shut up!”

Chuuya snapped, finally managing to roll over and shove Dazai away, climbing to his feet with a huff. He brushed the grass off his back, glaring down at Dazai.

All he see is a wide grin from his boss.

-"Aww, Chuuya, you look like you're going to have a heart attack or something!"

Scoffing, he sits down beside Dazai. The view down the hill is kind of... calm, he must admit. Sunlight strands lingering on his small figure, and a drop of silence wash by.

-"What would it be if the seasons never change?"

Chuuya raise an eyebrow, glancing skeptically at the boss.

-"Well.... I don't know. Only one weather over the years, I guess?

His confusion grows when Dazai burst out of laughing. Is there anything funny at all..?

-"...Well, Chibi, that's a tolerable answer."

-"And what's you 'better' idea, huh, boss?"

Dazai smiles slightly, staring at a distance. Surprisingly, it looks as if Chuuya has caught a glimpse of light in those dark, lifeless pupils.

-"...You'll know soon enough..."

A pause cut through the air, and Dazai returns to his snarky attitude,

-"Or you would never know, considering how stupid you are, I suppose."

[...]

The rain finally stops.

Hot summer air burns through the streets, which lead down a secluded part of the city. The sky is clear with not even a drop of cloud, and sunlight streams down every pedestrian who walks by. Chuuya's small figure casts a shadow on the ground, cooling down the area where the grey tombstone is standing.

Dazai Osamu.

Chuuya wonders, where is he now?

That freak.

His rival, his enemy, his number one assassin target, his boss, his love, and his everything-

Maybe he was just stupid - like Dazai said - too stupid for not realizing the meaning of the question he asked that day.

He must find him. He must find his boss. He has to drag him back to work after all-

But he doesn't realize - there's no place where the seasons never change...

If the seasons never change, maybe we could stay together for a little longer.

Except for the place where souls linger after death.

.

-Chuuya, don't cry.

The ginger's head immediately turns towards the voice. He turns around, and his sapphire eyes snap wide with surprise. Is that him?

-Dazai?!

Boss...?

The familiar voice now held a raspy tone, caught Chuuya off guard.

-...I'm sorry, Chuuya.

-The fuck do you mean sorry-?

-Wake up, back to reality, Chuuya. I'm no longer here.

...Oh. Oh.

He knows it now.

His boss was no longer human.

And Chuuya stands there, drowning in the memories that have never been once forgotten.

[autumnleaf1111]

Do you think that when Dazai left the Port Mafia, he blew up Chuuya’s car as a message. Basically saying “don’t come looking for me” or something? Idk, it just popped in my head.

[luneariann]

Continuation of the other comic I made earlier as @fixation-central s prompt! And in honor of my dear friend @evilkaeya who came up w this specific scenario :)!!