#god I miss donuts
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Absolutely insane that right now I’m sober, not drinking caffeine, not smoking, and eating the “””healthiest””” I’ve ever eaten in my life and my body is the most unhealthy it has ever been
#all of these things are to stop my health from getting worse#like if I didn’t feel like absolute dogshit if I did it I would be drinking black coffee and smoking cigarettes all day#and eating nothing but donuts#god I miss donuts#fucked that I finally developed a good relationship with food and then my body was like#actually if you eat anything remotely delicious or in larger quantities than a toddler you will feel horribly sick and wish you were dead
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FALLOUT 4 COMPANIONS CAN EAT THE EDIBLE THINGS YOU PUT IN THEIR INVENTORIES?????
#I’M SURPRISED BUT HAPPY ABOUT THIS INFO#i noticed this mechanic specifically bc i realized that nick was missing some of the donuts i had placed in his inventory….#DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS???#NICK VALENTINE IS EATING HIS DONUTS Y’ALL‼️#WE WOOOONNNNNN#fallout 4#fallout#NICK FOR THE LOVE OF GOD PLEASE STOP MAKING DONUTS#<- this is just the tag i’m using for all nick valentine donut posts
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can we start drawing red armor donut more. like i know he wasnt there for long but pls he lives on in my heart
#leave it to me to get attached to a character in a different color suit#GOD GUYS PLEASE I MISS HIM#red vs blue#rvb#franklin delano donut
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youtube
I need all the new Trigun fans who haven't been introduced to Tainted Donuts to watch this immediately (it's Tainted Donuts)
#trigun#vash the stampede#cowboy bebop#tainted donuts#AMV#god i miss the golden age of old AMVs#i just don't see storytelling like this anymore#the narrative is so clear. I love this so much#Youtube
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Sci I need you to know I, just now at 2 am, realised that you write the body pillow series. Which I found before I found the ask blog. Something of which I have read multiple times since finding you, along with other fics of yours I also didn’t make the connection of, and I never made the connection. This is wild to me. Love your work please never stop writing
the body pillow series... my magnum opus...
simping idiot peter parker my love my life my light my everything
#sci speaks#THANK you so much anon!!#im so glad you loved the body pillow series.. oh god.. what a time.. i miss it. a good au. domestic wade my darling my angel#donuts shared at breakfast... kisses in the elevator...#hooh. i miss them so much.
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coffee donut. i want coffee donut. craving donut
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I was gonna correct myself and say three nickels (possibly?) because I remembered someone else saying they were going to the concert on 8/19 (so maybe NE adjacent), but four?? Actually wild to me, I never meet people online who are from here !!
I'm gently placing a maple candy into your hands, always a new englander at heart 😌
If any of yall are from NH meet me on Mt Washington in five minutes for an ass kicking /j
MAPLE CANDY MY BELOVED
God I can feel my teeth rotting. Beauty. ♡
#miasma says#i miss new england food#fluffernutters and american chop suey and whoopie pies and maple candy#AND APPLE CIDER DONUTS GOD
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being a kokomi fan is pain because hyv doesn't know how to write her and now the "reincarnated water vishap" theory that used to be kokomi "sleeping dragoness" sangonomiya's plausible lore... is no longer just plausibly hers now lol.
#mine musings#liveblogging genshin#i need neuvillette to be an oceanid#if he turns out to be the water dragon i will be soooo devastated man#that will be the final nail in the coffin for kokomi#SHE COULD HAVE BEEN GREAT but hyv keeps missing writing opportunities for her!!!!#SHE SHOULD HAVE BEEN IN THAT THREE REALMS EVENT ughhhh i hated that event so much#mostly for the mechanics of it because it was a copy paste of the enkanomiya map. but also#we have kokomi who is deeply entwined with enkanomiya lore and she was barely even a blip in the event?#reputable strategist but she keeps being overshadowed by ayato and yae as the inazuma characters who can actually maneuver a situation???#god. kokomi i am SO sorry you keep getting L's#i got her to 10/10/10 AND i got the donut for her but none of that will ever fix her writing
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my client: ok let’s talk about my birthday
me: it’s in a month right?
client: yes. And I think I know what you can get me.
me: oh?
client: yes. I can promise you no hitting, no bad words, and being nice to my friends.
me: *thinking* this lil bean KNOWS the right things to do but is motivated by toys …
client: so what do you say?
#I swear to god#he picked out a paw patrol toy for me to buy him#and he said if they don’t have it#you can just bring me donuts#LMFAO#out of all my kiddos I’m going to miss him the most
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Food intolerance! The eating disorder you're allowed to have!
#annoying#i miss bread#is violent diarrhoea actually worse than a donut?#thank god i can still eat cheese#wait#i gotta go to the bathroom real quick#yaweh#if you take cheese from me i will convert to satanism
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I am in such an Officer K mood today 🥺🥺🥺 I have so many little pink hearts floating around my head when I think of him
#love notes#💕♬♪ ♡ I can't help falling in love with you ☆- ̗̀💛 ̖́-☆#I JUST AUAUGHH I LOVE HIM SO MUUUUUUCHHHHHH#thought about dancing to Elvis with him to cheer him up after he’s had a long day#laying in his lap while he reads Pale Fire to me and I don’t understand a single sentence but that’s ok bc he’s enjoying himself#giving him food from other dimensions he’s never even SEEN before#sugary cupcakes with pink frosting from BarbieLand (we’ll pretend it isn’t plastic)#cheese sandwiches (we can share with Deckard since he has a fondness for cheese and misses it)#pizza. potatoes. salmon. chocolate cakes. candy. warm chocolate chip muffins. DONUTS!!!!!!#to the point where every time he eats noodles he’s like what the hell have I been living off of#I’ve been thinking that his pet names for me would be so personal like. My Heart. My Beloved 🥺#and he doesn’t say it as a pet name he says it as a promise with such conviction#you are my heart because I cannot exist without you. i need you I care for you deeply you are the source of all love and desire#I’ve thought about us cuddling on the couch if I’m having nightmares and can’t sleep. he will recite fairy tales to me#or he makes some up on the spot 🥺 abt a princess who lives in the stars 🥺 and a knight named Joe who falls in love with her 🥺💕💕#GOD!!!! WHWGUWGUWHUH YEARNING!!!!!!!#love notes: officer k ♡
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atsumu who goes above and beyond to impress you, his crush and classmate of four years, in all definitions of “impress.”
honestly how the fuck isn't it obvious to you by now, he might as well be walking around with “i like y/n” tattooed on his forehead.
you mention you like guys that can cook once and holy fuck atsumu who still doesn't know how to use the microwave without quite literally burning the food, who's never chopped onions before without ending up with enough cuts to bandage his whole hand— that atsumu practices for weeks and stays up till 2 am to prepare for the lunch he'll make for himself, because osamu said said no and then because you bring homemade lunch to stay and eat in class with your friends— he'll casually just plop down on the seat next to you, his friends will then very obviously willingly talk loudly about his lunch and he'll just throw in a, “yeah, made it maself, 'm a solid chef, who do ya think taught 'samu?”
okay if that didn't get your attention, no worries, what are his friends there for?
if atsumu gets lucky in a day and catches you chatting away with your friends in the hallway, then he instructs his friends to walk past you, hover in the corner, just within your earshot�� “'kay, so when we pass her by, ya gotta speak ma name real loud, loud enough so she can hear it, but don't annoy her”
and so for the time you stand there, trying to hold a conversation with your friends, all your mind can really focus on is the, “atsumu was so fucking good in practice today, if we're gonna win, then it'll be all him”
and then you hear the subject of the conversation speak, “nah, we're a team, every time we win, it's all thanks ta you guys,” because you also mentioned you like modest, humble guys.
god forbid the days you're absent in class.
atsumu who's sulking all day, doesn't know what the fuck is going on in classes, he's half in and half not in every conversation, even his passes are sloppy and weak. to the point osamu and suna are concerned, well, in their own ways, “are ya constipated or something, yer missin’ your spikes and yer passes as clumsy,” osamu says off-handedly.
“i heard y/n didn't come today, i think her friends said she's sick.” suna chips in, and atsumu shrinks in his spot like a grumpy cat.
“i already know that, wouldn't have come today if i knew she wasn't comin’.”
“you'd miss practice then.”
“don't care, don't talk to me, don't wanna do anything, what's the point.”
“down fucking bad,” suna muses, and atsumu glares at him.
atsumu's day is ruined and his disappointment is immeasurable. why did you get sick? how could you get sick? now he's worried and half of himself and his passes are shit and god, he wants to see you. he feels like he could die.
then when you finally show up the next day after what felt like eternity to atsumu, you find on your desk a pile of snacks with a little note— banana milk, everyone knows it's your favourite, the bar of chocolate they only sell down the convenience store near the school, the glazed donuts that you're always eating in class, and a lot of bubblegums that only one person in class knows you like— atsumu's handwriting is rushed and barely comprehensive but you know it by heart because he doesn't know you saw him slip the note you found in your locker this morning, and countless other mornings—
“i hope you smile because of this”
atsumu as a secret admirer is... not so secret because he's still unaware that you see him every morning, and let him giggle to himself as he slips the notes and the strips of bubblegums in your locker— you don't even like that flavor.
but he gave them, so you think they might just be your favourite.
then again, maybe atsumu doesn't want to be a secret admirer.
atsumu has a crush on you and you know that— he's very obvious. but he's also very dense and doesn't realise that everyone besides him can see you like him too. he doesn't know the only reason you bring homemade lunch is because he had started to eat lunch in class with his friends. you stand in the hallways with your friends pretending to talk so that when atsumu's walking past you, his friends will practically yell his name and you'll see him blushing shyly. he still doesn't know you come to his every match, cheering for him and scream with joy at every one of his scores.
atsumu makes it obvious he has a crush on you but is stupidly dense that you reciprocate all the same :'))))
© yuquinzel 2024 [ plagiarism is a violation of moral rights ! ]
POSTING BECAUSE WHY TF NOT HUH HUHHHHHHHHH
@kyoghurts hi bbg
#❀˖° ─ hana writes.#ATSUMU IS ME ME IS ATSUMU#suddenly remember everything i did to impress my crush LMAO never again#if i had a dollar for everytime i wrote “atsumu”#haikyuu!!#haikyu x reader#miya atsumu#miya atsumu x reader#atsumu miya#atsumu x reader#atsumu fluff#haikyuu fluff#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu x you#atsumu x you#atsumu x y/n#atsumu drabble#haikyuu drabble
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pass the salt • e.m. smut
DAD’S BEST FRIEND!OLDER!EDDIE x FEM!READER
part two here
summary: you’re home from college and staying with your dad for the summer, spending as much time as you possibly can with him…and his hot best friend that you’ve never seen in your life.
authors note: okay have you guys ever seen those text posts like “when you say ‘daddy pass the salt please’ and your father and your man both reach for it” 💀💀 well this is inspired by that concept. also i went overboard and this is a LONG BOI
disclaimers — photo credits to @eddiemunsons-missingnipple 🫶🏼porn with plot, reader’s nickname is “sunshine”, reader has female anatomy, race unspecified, divider: @iluvpooks
NSFW — 18+ obv, porn with plot, daddy kink pls keep scrolling if it’s not ur thing, slight age gap (eddie is mid to late 30s, reader is in her early 20s), corruption kink, size kink, masturbation (m&f), p in v sex (protected), dirty talk, teasing, sexual innuendos, extreme flirting, eddie kinda being a perv, praise kink
The sound of breakfast on the griddle summons you downstairs.
Dad never cooks.
For as long as you can remember, weekends at your dad’s have always consisted of Lucky Charms cereal and powdered donuts. That tradition continued even after you started college.
Oh yeah. Someone is here, alright. Someone Dad desperately wants to impress.
Trailing after the commotion, your fuzzy pink slippers guide you down the wooden steps of your dad’s ‘bachelor pad’ and into the kitchen. And when you near the bottom of the steps, you can make out two distinct voices — one belonging to Dad, another belonging to someone who's identity is obscure.
“God, I fucking missed you, Jeff. Missed everyone so much.”
The smells of pancake batter, cigarette smoke, mint, and petroleum fuel reel you in, but not nearly as much as the sight of the man sitting on the opposite side of your dad. He's built, handsome with wavy brown hair, leather, black denim, twiddling a toothpick between his teeth as he listens to your dad speak with a smile on his face. That is, until you come into sight. It then that his intense focus circles in on you.
Funny. You don’t remember this friend. And something in your gut tells you that you won’t ever be forgetting him after this.
The stranger's grin curls into a wonder-filled smirk. You can feel your knees start to buckle.
“Uh oh. Looks like our shenanigans woke up Sleeping Beauty.”
When you get a closer look at Dad’s friend, you observe his faint brown beard — neatly kept and lightly peppered with some gray — delicious lips, shiny white teeth, and grooves along his laugh lines that would deepen with every theatrical cackle he belted out.
You can't help but freeze in your tracks as him and your dad continue on with their banter, reliving their glory days like it was yesterday. Man. What a damn dreamboat.
Your dad’s eyes light up with glee when he sees you.
“Hey, good morning, Sunshine!” Dad cheers. “Thought you’d never wake up. This is my friend Eddie. We were in that band together in high school. Come say hi.”
"Yeah, come say hi," Eddie agrees. feeding into the obvious tension in the room. "I don't bite."
The stranger laughs at his own comment as soon as he utters it.
There’s a charm — a magic — about Eddie that could only be found in Hollywood or the Big City. But of course, you didn't expect any less from Dad's supposed ‘Rockstar Friend’.
When your parents had you at 17, life went on for Dad’s band Corroded Coffin. And although he missed out on the ‘Sex, Drugs, and Rock&Roll’, Dad insists that tea parties and white picket fences were an ideal trade-off. Because — despite how things ended with Mom — it still meant a life spent with you.
You tell him your name as Eddie offers you his hand to shake. Electricity serges through you when your hand is enveloped by his firm, calloused one. Eddie smiles down at you, his presence all-consuming. It's almost as if he knows it. And as much as you were dying to, you resist the urge to fall into him.
Eddie's no better.
It takes everything in Eddie's power to keep his eyes above your collarbones, reprimanding himself with the utmost tedium. Because heaven knows he'd be TOAST if his best friend found out that Eddie thought that you were absolutely stunning — strutting around the house the way that you do, without a bra underneath that poor excuse of a sleep shirt — a sleep shirt far too tight for your own good. With tight, pajama shorts to match…
Of course, this is all an assumption…Not that he caught wind of it or anything.
“You know…” he mentions. “Your dad has told me SO much about little miss Sunshine.”
“Me, really?” is all you can say behind those fuscia cheeks.
“Really,” Eddie insists. “He never shuts up about you, darling.”
“Hopefully you’ve only heard good things,” you mutter faintly.
And instantly, your dad and Eddie share a laugh.
“Only good things,” Eddie assures you. He nudges your dad playfully.
Your dad doesn’t exactly deny the last part, basically confirming to Eddie that you’ve got a hint of spunk to you. The heat settles at your cheeks as you shy away from your father’s curious friend.
Taking note of how timid you’ve just become, Eddie furrows his brows.
“What — was that an implication that you’re not always good?”
“No comment,” your smile melts into an awkward one.
“Kept me on my toes back then,” your dad reflects with a sigh. “Keeps me on my toes now.”
“You don’t say…” Eddie smirks slightly, gaze panning back over to you.
Eventually your dad leaves you two alone, going into the garage to fetch something that he insists Eddie would like. But little did he know that such thing was already in the room, leaning…reaching into the fridge for some orange juice, not realizing its atmosphere caused your nipples to harden.
Eddie’s eyes proceed to follow you as you strut back to the griddle, flipping some hot cakes over before tending to your messy bedhead.
Eddie probably doesn’t know — or maybe he does, who knows? — that you feel him staring at you. It’s a burning gaze that practically impales you, but you’re too nervous to say anything. You’re better off pretending like it’s something you don’t notice.
You and Eddie continue to help yourselves to breakfast, enjoying the company of each other and your mutual silence. That is, until Eddie speaks up.
“Got some sausage for you if you’d like.”
“I’m sorry?” you sputter, looking up from your food.
Eddie shoots you a weird glance as he holds up some breakfast franks.
“Sausage?” he repeats. “Store was out of beef so I settled for turkey. Hope that’s not a problem.”
“Not at all,” you clear your throat. “I love turkey sausage.”
“Okay, good,” Eddie chuckles, seemingly relieved at how quickly the situation had diffused.
“Cool,” you chuckle with him while taking some links to cook.
The silence returns once more and is replaced by the sizzling of the grill. It’s short lived, however, because soon, the man nearly twice your age speaks again.
“What’d you think I said?” Eddie circles back.
“Nothing, why?”
“You just looked stunned.”
“I just woke up,” you shrug. “My mind’s somewhere else.”
“I can tell,” he smirks. “Get that thing out of the gutter.”
The coming days paved way for some more innocent flirting.
…Like when you make sure to wear the shortest skirt in your closet when running Eddie his afternoon beer in the garage.
“Well don’t you look absolutely darling…” he says as he peers up from his guitar.
“Hehe,” you smirk connivingly. “Thank you!”
“You are so welcome.”
Eddie downs the liquid guilt along with his pride, watching you strut around…the hem of that pleated cotton fabric just barely covering the roundness of your asscheeks. And as you blush a rosy pink when you process his little remarks, Eddie can only clear his throat in arousal, fantasizing about just how badly he wanted to turn your other cheeks that very shade.
…Or when you come downstairs the next day to help Dad manually wash his car.
While he and Eddie are harassing each other with soap and that god-forsaken hose, you decide to join in on all the fun.
“Watch out, Sunshine,” Eddie forewarns. “You’ve just entered the splash zone!”
And with the intention of cooling you off on a hot summer day like this, Eddie teasingly sprays you with said hose, your white shirt becoming transparent when lathered with water. He could see everything. Your erect nipples. Your perky tits bouncing in the sunlight as you jump around in excitement. How glazed your oil-nnuendo’ed skin looked when glimmering in the sun. All as intended.
“You got me,” you surrender yourself to him. “You got me good, Eddie.”
And when you walk away, Eddie mutters slyly to himself.
“Yes, yes I did.”
…And then there’s dessert after dinner.
Eddie watches as you lick your popsicle, his fingers curling at his thighs in arousal as you retract the wrapper before enclosing your lips around the bright pink dessert. And he swears he’s going to blow his pants when he envisions the melted sugar shooting into your mouth with the swiftest hollowing of your cheeks, the quiet suction noise you make with your pursed lips forcing him to adjust the way he’s sitting.
…The final instance takes the cake.
“What’s your major?”
You’re in the home library grazing some of Dad’s old books and vinyls, talking to Eddie while your father gets ready for the day. Meanwhile, Eddie is perched at your dad’s desk, rolling around in his expensive swivel chair and occasionally doing some spins on it to make you laugh.
“History.”
“Sounds boring.”
“You just haven’t found a topic that interests you,” you point out.
“Mm,” is all Eddie says. “Maybe I will eventually.”
Eddie watches as you waltz around in front of him, following your movements with his eyes as you get onto your tippy-toes in order to grab some books on the top shelf.
“Oh my god!” you yelp.
Your plan to entice him seemingly fails when you graze a book that’s halfway off the shelf. It’s already flying off of its platform, headed straight towards Eddie's lap before you can even stop it.
Eddie catches it before any damage can be done, saving Dad’s old campaign book with the hand furthest from you and snaking the other around your waist to prevent you from sinking any further into him.
Phew. Crisis averted.
Your eyes meet again.
“I’m so sorry, Eddie,” you gasp in embarrassment. “That book has a mind of its own.”
“You’re fine,” Eddie laughs. “Can’t defy the laws of gravity. Sometimes it betrays us.”
You feel yourself burning up a fever. Excusing yourself from the room, you leave Dad’s library and make your way over to the kitchen for a glass of water.
But you’re nearly taken aback when you feel tight, calloused hands wrap around your hips, and like a feather it’s like you’re whisked away into the air, and soon your body is pressed up against the wall.
Slam!
Breathing heavily against each other now — chest to chest, lips so unbearably close you can smell the whiskey — Eddie draws you even closer to him. You both study each other intently. It’s like you’re waiting for the other to say something. Eddie does the honors and speaks first.
“I wasn’t born last night, doll. I was also your age at one point.”
———
To his own despair, Eddie touches himself later that night. Facing your room, he strokes his rock hard cock with his lotioned-up hand, running his thumb across the slit of his head, pretending it’s your tongue giving him a little tease like you did the popsicle.
“Fuuuck,” he grunts quietly. “You like when I fuck your throat, baby? Gonna suck me dry with that pretty little mouth of yours?”
You’re playing make-believe just as much. Because at the same time, in your room, you’re a drooling, pathetic mess, riding your wall-mounted toy to oblivion in your bathroom, legs trembling when the thick, veiny piece of silicone slams into the spongy part of your heat, initiating shock-waves all across your body.
“Eddie,” you find yourself blubbering. “EddieEddieEddieEddie…”
You both know it can’t be like this, but that was the mere thrill of it all. And when you both have overcome your peak, just one mere wall apart, the floodgates of guilt outweighs both your arousals the way it comes pouring in.
So, so wrong. But oh, so right.
You’re anticipating…waiting…aching for Eddie to make the next move.
He doesn’t.
“Going to the store again,” Eddie announces. “Hopefully this time they’ll have beef sausage. Need anything?”
Need you, is what you think. But you end up shaking your head, a part of you disappointed that you and Eddie won’t be able to spend some time alone together.
“No,” there’s defeat in your voice.
“Are you sure?” Eddie questions softly.
“Mhm,” you nod.
“Okay,” he gives you a grin, one in the form of a tight-lipped smile. “I’ll be right back. You be good.”
“Ha-ha,” you roll your eyes.
——
Eddie leaves the door of his room open that night. Just a smidge. You end up following the sound of his TV that he’s placed at a low volume, making out that it’s Seinfeld just by Jerry’s voice and the laugh track.
Your heart skips a beat as Eddie laughs along with the show, shaking his head at a stupid joke. But he shifts his focus immediately onto you when he sees you at the doorway.
“Having some alone time tonight?” you ask him.
“Mmm…not by choice,” he responds. “Tuckered your dad out after dinner doing P90X.”
Eddie follows a crazy workout routine. He says that it helps with his stamina, especially when he does crowd work during his stage performances. Your mind can’t help but wonder what else he may be using it for.
You snort. “Yeah. Dad wasn’t what you’d call an athlete in high school.”
Eddie laughs at that too. Both you and him know that.
He then pats the space on his bed beside him. “Wanna come watch with me?”
Your stomach does a series of cartwheels when you process Eddie’s question. You know what’s bound to happen if you follow through. And it seems Eddie knows it too. Even if there wasn’t any sexual tension between you both already, the concept of it all would rub anyone that way.
But you still follow through with it. Just like Eddie knew you would.
“You comfortable?” Eddie asks you, eyeing you endearingly as you squirm around on the bed.
“Yeah,” you breathe.
“Good…” he replies, voice nearly at a strained whisper now.
You two watch the show in silence for a few minutes, exchanging commentary and pleasantries regarding the show every so often. It’s not too long after Eddie pulls a laugh from you that he starts closing up the space between you both, scooting himself closer…and resting his gruff palm over the base of your knee.
You inhale sharply as he does so. And evident by your refusal to pull away, it’s enough of a green light for Eddie to hike up further.
A soft moan escapes your mouth from the back of your flustered throat, but you bite your lip in restraint.
"I'm sorry," you whisper.
"For what?”
You shrug sheepishly as Eddie continues to graze your thigh. Your breathing falters even more.
“Don’t be scared,” Eddie coos.
“I’m not,” you insist.
“Then what’s stopping you from getting on top of me? Hm?”
He’s in between your legs now, the rough material of his denim jeans riding up your sex, teasing your clit with every calculated rub against it.
“And riding my rock hard cock til those pretty legs give out?” Eddie continues. “I see how you’ve been looking at me, doll. It's all over your face how bad you want it.”
“The bed is squeaky,” you answer honestly. “And that headboard is a lost cause.”
Eddie puts the dirty talk on pause, squirming around to assess the guest bed’s squeak factor. When it checks out, he gives you an understanding nod. You giggle.
Eddie wastes no more time. You watch as he grabs one of the pillows on the bed and wedges it between the wall and headboard. He issues you a sly smile.
“Oldest trick in the book.”
You're back to fooling around shortly after, your aching core burning with lust as you pine for him.
“The boys at school ever touch you this good?” Eddie quips rubbing circles around your puffy, needy folds as you hopelessly cling to him out of pleasure.
“No, Eddie.”
“Didn’t think so.”
He continues to tease, gliding his fingers along your slit before slowly inserting two large digits inside of you.
His calculated pumps into your needy pussy are steady, a pace so agonizingly beautiful that it makes you squeal sweet nothings into the crook of his neck.
"Shh, baby," Eddie hushes you. "Your dad's gonna hear us. Gotta be quiet for me, mkay?"
Your hot, messy, and muffled sounds cease as Eddie soothes your quivering lips with his tender ones.
The wet sounds that ricochet and fill the room in tandem is almost enough to send him over. And Eddie is sure to communicate that… with an abrupt curving of his three thick fingers.
Fuck.
Needing him direly now, you tug helplessly at his pants.
“God, Eddie,” you whimper. “Just fuck me already. Please.”
Eddie laughs at the desperation. He hasn’t ravaged you to his fullest extent yet, and you’re already a pooling mess beside him.
“Well since you said please, sweet girl,” Eddie obliges as he starts to undress himself. “Your wish is my command."
You watch Eddie as reaches over into the bedside drawer for a fresh box of condoms. Looks like the sausage links weren't the only things he went to the store for.
“Oh.”
Eddie chuckles at your observation before shrugging. Can you really blame him? You both knew what was coming.
You watch with absolute lust as Eddie slides the piece of rubber over his long, girthy, throbbing cock. He’s bigger than anyone you’ve ever had before, and the snarky, hooded-eye smile as he watches you fawn reveals to you that he knows exactly how to use it.
"On your stomach, babygirl. Will have you all nice and pounded out just like you wanted.”
You situate yourself in prone and spread your legs for Eddie to line himself up against them. He teases his wrapped cock against the entrance of your pussy, and when his soothing countdown is over, your lips part in disposition as you accommodate his ruinous stretch.
A throaty moan spills out of the both of you the moment Eddie snaps his hips in and out of you. Meanwhile, one of his hands lays tauntingly at your stomach, so the prideful man can feel himself wriggling inside you, glazing his shaft with your slick more and more with every pump into your weak cunt.
"Fuck, Eddie... yes..." you mewl. "R-right there, Eddie, please..."
And then it picks up. You can feel Eddie’s hips practically collapse right onto you, his balls slapping against you as he digs further into your body.
"God damn..." the man sighs in disbelief.
He can only beam down at you in awe. You were taking him so good, pussy swallowing him so nice and tight. And when you nestle your ankles between each other to keep him there in prone, the nearly cries out in pleasure, but refrains because he knows your dad is resting — just a thin wall over.
That still doesn’t stop him from going to town though. Practically seeing stars, the broken record of a mouth that belongs to you chants Eddie’s name like it’s all you know. Eddie attempts to keep you contained, offering you his fingers to suck on as he’s railing you dumb.
And when he fucks you through your climax, Eddie continues with his string of lust-filled praises, satisfied at himself that he was able to make you wet enough to soak the mattress.
“Did so good for me, angel,” he praises you as he sucks at your temple. “Always knew you weren’t all that innocent.”
The griddle comes out again on Eddie’s last day. But this time, for a homestyle southern dinner.
You and Eddie were on mashed potatoes and gravy duty at the stove, an ordeal that only opened doors for lots of innuendos on Eddie’s part. Meanwhile, Dad insisted on making the rest, having taken pride in continuing his Mama’s legacy.
“This is amazing, Daddy,” you rave. “I really missed this. Do you mind passing the salt, please?”
And to your horror, you watch as your father and Eddie automatically extend their arms, bumping into one another in the process en route to getting you the salt.
The gentlemen meet each other’s eyes.
“Ohp!” Eddie exclaims, letting out a slight chuckle. “Sorry.”
You try your hardest not to blush. Eddie kicks you from under the table, and softly he oh-so-seductively he mutters,
“I was just tryna help her out.”
#eddie munson#eddie munson smut#older! eddie munson#older!eddie#older!eddie munson smut#older!eddie smut#dad’s best friend!eddie#dad’s best friend!eddie munson#dom!eddie#dom!eddie munson#eddie munson x reader#eddie x reader#eddie munson x reader smut
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i love stomach pain so bad i get a little lightheaded and i have to put effort into breathing and i get nauseous and shaky :’)
#but at the same time i feel like i can’t really talk about it because like. ultimately it is my own fault#i did it to myself. again. i know i shouldn’t eat some things because this is what happens#but.. i just really wanted some noodles… i know it sounds pathetic but i miss just being able to eat foods i like#i miss noodles and pizza and burgers and donuts and sandwiches#now my options are 1) don’t eat them at all 2) eat inferior versions 3) eat the good ones but pay the price for it later#it just. makes me sad. i know it’s childish of me but god it’s just not fair#it’s not fair!#oh well
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08x06 Delulu
Tevan are at the Italian restaurant. The Hot Waiter flirts with Buck. Buck's kinda oblivious. He unintentionally flirts back. Buck pays this time, and inside the folder with his card and receipt is Hot Waiter's phone number. Buck is a little weirded out because he feels like it's obvious he and Tommy are on a date.
For the most part, Tommy watches Buck and Hot Waiter's interaction in amusement. He jokes whether Buck is he's going to call him, and Buck is taken aback. Then Tommy gets serious.
"We haven't really talked about the kind of relationship you want."
Buck's confused. "What does that mean?"
"Just that there's more than one way to be in a relationship. I've been in a couple that were open."
"Open?"
"We were allowed to sleep with other people."
"I know what it means, Tommy. Is that what you want?"
"I want you to be happy. I want you to know I'm amenable to that if you're interested. Truth be told, Evan, the most important thing is that you're in my life, whether we’re together or not.
Suddenly, the Ironside siren goes off in Buck’s head, and he’s spiraling.
Tommy clasps his hand and looks at him like he’s the goddamn sun, moon, and stars. “Think about it. It’s not like it’s something you have to decide today.”
Cue Buck, going to Bobby. “I don’t know what to tell you, Buck, but I’ve seen you two together. I don’t think breaking up is something Tommy is even thinking about. The other stuff...you should talk to Tommy. Be upfront. Be honest.
Cue Buck, going to Maddie. “Buck, he kissed you while you were still covered in boils. I saw that with my own eyes and wished I hadn’t. I don’t want to put words in his mouth, but he does seem very committed to you. And to be perfectly honest, the open relationship doesn’t sound like something he’d suggest out of thin air. Maybe you said something...”
“You’re blaming me? Come on, Maddie! You know damn well that’s not how I roll. I slept around, yeah, but not while I was in a relationship - and don’t you dare bring up Taylor! Besides, an agreed upon “open” means consensual. I just - how did I miss that this was something he was interested in? Why would he wait six months to bring it up?”
A sound of disgust emanates from the corner of the call center's breakroom, and the Buckley siblings' heads swivel to its location. Josh is sitting at a table, sipping his coffee and rolling his eyes. “You sweet naive baby bi.” He gets up from his chair, sidles up to Buck, and eyes the donuts he brought for Maddie. “I don’t suppose there's a Bavarian cream in there?”
“There’s a jelly,” Buck says.
“But jellies are my favorite,” Maddie complains.
“Too bad. I’m about to help your chaotic brother out, so I deserve it.” Josh bites into the donut and gives an appreciative moan. “Oh god, I haven’t had refined sugar in three days. How I missed you.”
“Back to me, please,” Buck says with a whine.
“Look, it’s pretty simple. There are only two types of guys who want to open up a relationship after the six-month mark. Assholes carrying multiple red flags or..”
“Tommy’s not an asshole,” Buck tells him firmly.
“Considering he’d whittle a rocking chair if you asked him to, I’d agree. Buck, my guess is he’s scared. He's worried that if he doesn't give you a free pass, that you'll get bored with him and leave.”
“That’s so stupid,” Buck cries in dismay.
Maddie lays a supportive hand on his bicep.
“It is,” Josh agrees. “But just because your man is a solid L.A. nine doesn’t mean he’s not carrying around a lot of insecurities. Talk to him. Tell him. And hey, if it all blows up on you, send him my way. I’d love to be that man’s shoulder to cry on.”
Buck shows up at Tommy’s door. Tommy is supposed to come to his after finishing his laundry, but Buck doesn’t want to wait that long. “Hey,” Tommy greets him with that scrunchy smile Buck loves so much.
“I don’t want to have sex with anyone else,” Buck tells him as he barges through the door.
“Oh-kay,” Tommy says, closing the door behind Buck.
“Do you want to have sex with other men?”
Tommy crosses his arms, and his head tilts towards the ground. “No. I’ve come to learn that’s not an ideal situation for me.”
Buck scoffs. “Then why suggest it?”
The buzzer on the washer goes off, and Tommy moves towards it to switch out the load. “I don’t know. I’m pretty used to you flirting with everyone.”
“You think I flirt?”
“Evan, you told the waiter you liked his chinos while eyeing his ass. Most of the time, I think it’s cute how you rile people up without realizing it, but then I have a thought like, what if Hot Waiter would be a better match for you? So I panicked and threw out that suggestion.”
“Jesus, Tommy. For the past six months, my brain has been consumed by nothing but you. Yet you think I can be swayed by some guy in a comfortable pair of pants? I only want you.”
“I know. I do. You prove that to me every day. I didn’t suggest it because I don’t trust you.” Tommy tosses one of Buck’s hoodies into the dryer and starts it. He can’t keep eye contact with Buck for more than a few seconds, and he looks paler than when Buck first arrived. Tommy’s also picking his middle fingernail with his thumb, and that’s Tommy’s tell that he’s feeling overwhelmed. “Uh, so like, I’m in this for the long haul. I think you’re it for me, Evan, and I don’t want you to ever feel like you’ve settled or...”
“I love you,” Buck tells him with a certainty he doesn’t think he felt even eight hours ago, but it’s the god’s honest truth. “Just seeing you makes me feel so full I could combust. ”
Tommy’s eyes are glossy and he blinks rapidly to keep the tears at bay. He finally locks eyes with Buck. “Loving you has been living in the back of my mind since...I honestly don’t know how long. I’ve been trying to temper my expectations because I haven’t been super successful in relationships. But then you started leaving clothes here, and suddenly you’ve infiltrated my life like no one else has been willing to. Next thing I know, I’m at a funeral for a long dead cowboy. I watched you embrace the memory of a forgotten man, and I realized I couldn’t love you more, Evan. Boils and all.”
Aaaaand that’s it. I’m tapped out.
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I'm stupid, do me (Spencer Reid)
Pairing: Spencer Reid x Reader
Summary: Frustration and zoning out can lead to interesting things.
Warnings: None really, just ogling Spencer illusions to sex~
Words: 588
Main Masterlist | Criminal Minds Masterlist
AN Basically it's that Tik Tok sound meme "I have the urge to do something stupid." "I'm stupid, do me." Very short and fun
Spencer and you were stuck in a small precinct room, him working on the geographical profile and you attempting to help, but kind of zoning out from lack of sleep. Things have been non-stop around the clock lately. It was like serial killers decided the BAU didn’t need a break and honestly it was a little rude. A little beauty sleep goes a long way.
But right now you were running on really bad police coffee, some way too sweet donuts (like how is that even possible?), and the sight of Spencer Reid in his purple button up and his sleeves rolled up.
God he looked so good not only in button ups, but in that color, really brings out his eyes. Speaking of his eyes, they were narrowed in thought, scanning over the map, nimble fingers marking different spots.
You bite your lip now thinking about his fingers. If he wasn’t your coworker you would have already tried to sleep with him. It was super unprofessional to sleep with a man you work so closely with, but that didn’t stop your fantasies from running wild. It’s also not like he felt anywhere near the same as you did.
Hotch came into the room, Morgan and Emily following behind him. You didn’t hear what they were saying, honestly not even really noticing they were there, eyes still eating Spencer alive.
“There has to be something else we can try.” Hotch crossed his arm.
Spencer went from the table to the board. “I have the urge to do something stupid.”
“I’m stupid, do me.” You voice up.
Silence fell over the room as everyone turned to you, you being unaware of what had just come out of your mouth due to the fact that you were still staring at Spencer’s arms.
All of the sudden it hit you.
You shot up from your seat, eyes wide and looking around at the people in the room. “I said that out loud didn’t I?” Morgan grins at you and Spencer awkwardly nods his head. “I’m just gonna…”
Sprinting from the room, you hear cheering from the room, feeling kind of betrayed that your coworkers would celebrate your awkwardness. Groaning you stop to hit your head on the wall. Normally you were able to keep your sexy comments to yourself, but you were going to blame the lack of sleep.
“Did you mean it?”
You jump at the sound of Spencer’s voice behind you. “Geez Spencer! Don’t do that.” There was a beat of silence before you went on a ramble, “Look I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable in there. I am running on like zero sleep and that really bad police coffee and no sex for like months and it just kind of came out.”
“But did you mean it?”
“Y yeah I did.”
Spencer grins, taking your face in his hands and crashing your lips together, you gasp at the sudden contact before melting into his touch. His lips are slightly cracked, but you didn’t mind, especially when he drags you into the nearest room, shutting and locking the door.
“We have to make this quick,” He says between kissing you, “but I am not passing this up. I’ve waited too long for you.”
For once you were so grateful for your tired big mouth.
And don’t worry, after the mind blowing sex, Spencer was revved up and clear headed and found the missing link in geographical profile, leading to the take down of the Unsub.
Go crazy sex.
(Banners by cafekitsune)
#spencer reid#dr spencer reid#spencer reid x reader#criminal minds fanfic#criminal minds#criminal minds x reader#mgg fanfiction#mgg x reader#mgg#matthew gray gubler
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