#glad to know im not alone with these opinions
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Oh Liam totally has PTSD 100% especially after season six, we even see more of it in the zoo when Liam literally sees Brett hurting him, and while we can argue that’s guilt I don’t actually believe that hasn’t happened before.
I think the fans and writers sometimes (not necessarily on purpose) excuse Liam’s mental instability and self-loathing/harm with stage fact he’s a werewolf, “oh, he literally just cut into his own palms so that they’re pouring blood… it’s fine he’s a werewolf he’ll heal”
There is nothing more beautiful to me than Theo and Liam seeing each other and understanding the other despite everyone else’s hesitation towards the two. Both no what it’s like to be feared and both are the exception to each other.
yup! tw isnt really the show for this, i guess, bc theres so much trauma they put the characters through and then just.. kinda forget about that? theres a lot of untouched potential with the storylines they start, for sure. and they love to play liams character off as the comedic relief, which i Hate. that scene in s5 where liam tells scott to punch him so he'll get angry??? haha funny and werewolf logic and whatever but how fucked up is that? liam offering himself as a punching bag, probably thinking hes useless if it wasnt for his anger? and this is in s5b so he feels horribly guilty about having tried to kill scott. sure, he needs to get angry so he'll get strong in that situation, but he 100% thought he deserved getting punched by scott.
and the zoo scene, oh boy. i personally do not think that that was just liam hallucinating something that never happened/that he was only projecting his guilt or whatever. that episode is named "triggers". theo, word for word, says: "something around here is triggering you." why would they focus that much on something TRIGGERING liam when its not something that actually happened to him. idk about you, but that makes zero sense to me. and its not like its out of line for bretts character to have done something like that. (personally hate when people erase this part of bretts character because it automatically takes away from liams character. like sorry that this random guy that you like for reasons unbeknownst to me is an asshole, at least own up to it and dont pretend he isnt as big of a dick as he canonically is.)
(^ i say, with theo as one of my favorite characters. im aware that hes an asshole. i do not care. im not pretending that he isnt.)
the brief focus on the warning sign about "dangerous animals" above the cage (reminder that this happened before liam was a werewolf) and liam begging scott, saying "they can't see me like this" and scott finishing "like a monster?" during his first full moon. yeah. liam has thought of himself as a monster long before he got bitten. that boy has serious self-worth issues and a bunch of trauma.
theo and liam helping each other through their trauma, recognizing the other's pain and seeing themselves in each other is so important to me. an aspect i love to focus on.
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okay thats interesting! in the SF try-outs during the song "legally blonde" she sings about how she cant be legally blonde, while in the official version AND THE DEMO she sings about letting her be legally blonde. which means that at some point they changed the lyrics around, and then changed them back! laurence o'keefe.... nell benjamin.... what occurs in your twisted minds
#covers mouth sorry so sorry guys#im a huge fan of beacon of positivity + good boy (elle puts a leash on emmett confirmed) + love and war (not in the demo but part of SF)#+ i liked some of the lyrics in the demo version of so much better (it called back to beacon of positivity!!! (i am insane)) such as:#I dream of your name next to my own but mine's looking fine up there alone#but i greatly prefer all the official songs we got. well. maybe good boy over ireland wouldve been fun (i think ireland is boring)#but itd play into the 'all men are dogs hurr hurr' joke that im glad they avoided. anyways. what was i saying.#right i havent listened to every version of everything yet (for example theres a SF version of chip on my shoulder i need to watch)#(and just the SF vers in general. shes hidden from me... why was emmett there before the remix... let me see their conversation)#but from what i have heard they made a lot of changes that were sorely needed. in take it like a man demo shes so much meaner??#it made me sad. it wasnt a duet + they wrung out the romantic tension (no subtext by calvin klein... sigh) + shes meaner!!!!#in the bway vers hes baffled but enjoys going along w it + she genuinely likes him even when hes wearing his regular clothes#but in the demo vers she keeps calling him stuff like ugly duckling and talking about how the geek is gone :( but she likes that geek..#the lines 'how much do you think i earn??' and 'kindly shut up :)' are funny but speak to a dynamic between the two that makes me sad...#follow me for more beautiful opinions on a fifteen year old musical#(heaves. do you know weird it is to see comments from 15yrs ago when this was actually showing. my brother is fifteen.)#god im so sorry i should be put down like a dog#lgb bootleggers are intense. i swear they got a bootleg every night or smth bc we got her shoe flying off + SF + kyle as understudy etc#go watch a so much better compilation sometime how did they take so many bootlegs?? how did you find them??#and its awesome cause these were filmed on 2007/2008 tech which means they have 15 pixels maximum#SORRRRYYYYYYYYYY
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credits to the gif maker!
GUILTY AS SIN...? - PART I
summary: one summer with the man you can't have, but can't stop thinking about.
pairing: cillian murphy x popstar!reader
word count: 5.5k
warnings: 18+ (minors dni). mentions of sex. angst. cussing, slight age gap, mentions of alcohol and divorce. no use of y/n, heavily inspired by ts and ttpd. if i missed something please let me know. (also this is a work of fiction, none of it reflects how i feel about the people mentioned in this, most importantly cillian's wife, who im sure is a sweetheart irl. it's fiction, just relax and enjoy it, and if not, move along, friends.)
a/n: hi everyone! this turned out pretty long so i will be splitting it into parts so it's easier. next part will be posted soon. i hope you all have as much fun reading this as i had writing it. enjoy!
part two
The breeze riffled through your hair as you drove, the sun warming your skin through the open windows. The Irish countryside stretching out before you, lush and green, with rolling hills and quaint villages dotting the landscape. The scent of wildflowers and the sound of nothing but the wind in the trees filled your senses.
It was rare, really. The silence, the feeling of complete freedom, and the solitude that enveloped you. A fleeting escape from the chaos of your everyday life.
The ping of your phone interrupted the peaceful moment. You tapped on the pop-up notification after briefly glancing at the directions to your destination. It was a message from Cillian. Well, two, actually. One was asking how far you were, and the other was a Spotify link followed by a question mark. Ever since he started hosting his bbc radio show, he's been sending you potential songs for his playlists to get your opinion. Not that he needs it anyway. But you always appreciate being included in his process.
Your lips curled into a smile as you clicked on the link. The familiar sound of The Blue Nile's "The Downtown Lights" flooded the car, instantly making you feel a wave of nostalgia. It's been ages since you've listened to that song. The synth-pop melody carries you up the pine-dotted path to where his house perches atop a hill, overlooking the crashing waves below. You've been here a couple of times, and yet it never gets less breathtaking. The Victorian architecture contrasting beautifully with the rugged coastline, creating a scene straight out of a painting.
The car glides right past the wrought iron gates, and you cut the engine in front of the stone steps leading up to the grand entrance. You shoot Cillian a quick text letting him know you're here, unbuckle your seat belt, and hop out of the car.
The June sun beats down on your skin instantly, heat radiating off the cobblestones as you open the backdoor to look through your bag for a hair tie. The smell of saltwater mingles with the sound of gulls overhead, sending you into sensory overload. "Gotcha," you mutter to yourself as you finally find the hair tie and pull your hair back into a loose bun.
"You drove here?" you hear him call out from behind you, his voice tinged with surprise. "And you're alone?" you turn around to see Cillian walking towards you, a curious expression on his face.
"I actually had to throw a tantrum to convince them to let me come alone," you reply with a chuckle, feeling a sense of pride at your small victory. "I was like, It's Ireland. What's the worst that could happen?"
Being who you are means being guarded against any potential danger or harm at all times, being driven to almost everywhere, and always having a security team around.
Cillian laughs, a sound that makes your heart flutter and makes you want to hear it again and again. "Well, I'm glad you made it here in one piece, love," he says with a grin. "You're not a very good driver."
Your cheeks flush with embarrassment. You did regret your decision to drive from the airport 10 minutes later when you realized you were on the wrong side of the road. But he didn't need to know that.
"I made it in one piece, didn't I?" you playfully retort, trying to salvage your wounded pride. Cillian chuckles and shakes his head with a twinkle in his eye. You stare at each other for what feels like an eternity. He looks good, you thought. Unbelievably good. Well rested. His jet black hair was perfectly styled, even though you know he didn't put any effort into it—the slightest hint of silver at the temples, his sharp jawline, and those piercing blue eyes that seemed to see right through you. Though they looked a little tired, as if he had been through a lot since the last time you saw him.
You quickly avert your gaze, feeling a rush of heat on your cheeks.
"It's good to see you," you finally manage to say, trying to sound casual. Cillian's smile softens, and he replies, "It's good to see you too." He opens his arms, inviting you in for a hug. The soft fabric of his t-shirt brushes against your skin as you embrace him, and for a moment, everything feels right in the world.
"Come on, let's get inside," he says, leading you towards the house. Once inside, you make your way to the kitchen. The house was quiet; you wondered if anyone else was home. Cillian's family wasn't by any means loud or boisterous, but the silence felt heavier than usual.
"You hungry, love?" Cillian asks, opening the fridge, pulling out a white ceramic container, and setting it up on the kitchen island. You take a seat on one of the stools while he stands across from you.
"For something sweet?" you smile, seeing the container filled with what seems to be a piece of strawberry sponge cake. His mom must've made it. "Always," you reply. He hands you a spoon and takes one for himself, the two of you sharing the dessert in comfortable silence.
Until he broke it.
"How was Madrid?" he asks softly.
"It was good, great crowd," you reply, taking another bite of the dessert. "But tiring," you add, feeling the exhaustion of the long trip settling in.
"How many nights did you perform?"
"Four."
"Jesus, that's quite a lot, isn't it?"
Your eyes meet his; confusion clear in your expression. "You think that's a lot? Didn't you used to do four or five nights in a row of the same play?" you ask, raising an eyebrow. "for months…?
"Yeah, but that was a different kind of exhaustion," he explains, taking another bite. "Performing the way you do in front of a live audience for three hours is a whole different ball game, love."
Love.
There it was again. That godforsaken term of endearment that he seemed to throw around so casually. It made your heart race every time he said it, even though you knew it probably meant nothing to him. But the way he looked at you now, with a hint of admiration in his eyes, made you wonder if maybe—
"Want the last bite?" he offered, taking you out of your thoughts. He pushed the container towards you, a small smile playing on his lips. His gaze was intense, as if silently urging you to take it.
"Oh, hello," a voice exclaimed from behind you, breaking the moment. You drop the spoon on the counter, a little startled. As if you were caught in the act of something forbidden. You turned around to see Yvonne, Cillian's wife. She said your name with a surprised tone, making you feel guilty for some reason. "I didn't know you were here," she continued, her eyes flickering between you and her husband.
You started to rise from your seat, confusion clouding your thoughts. That's weird. Cillian usually lets his wife know when you're visiting, but this time it seems like he didn't. She walked towards you, enveloping you in a hug. "When did you get here?" she said.
"Not long ago," you replied, relieved that she didn't seem upset. "I, uh, wanted to take a break and thought Ireland might be a good place to do that," you added, hoping to diffuse any tension that may have arisen. She nodded understandingly. "And you're staying here?"
"Oh, no, no," you quickly assured her. "I rented a place nearby, so you don't have to worry about me."
"Nonsense," Cillian interjected. "You can stay here. There's plenty of room."
"She's already paid for it, Cillian," Yvonne retorted, giving him a stern look.
Something was definitely off.
This was the last thing you wanted. You've specifically chosen the cottage for two reasons. First, to have space. The whole point of this trip was to finally have peace and write music. You've been stuck for months, not being able to find inspiration in your usual surroundings. Everything felt dull inside you all day—an emptiness that was smothering.
Second, you needed to stay the fuck away from Cillian. Being close to him was dangerous territory, one you didn't want to navigate right now. The plan was to come and visit and occasionally hang out and that's it. The thought of being in such close quarters with him was overwhelming. Staying here meant risking your heart and sanity.
You hesitated, also not wanting to intrude on their space, but Cillian insisted.
"Okay…How about if I stay for a couple of days and then move to the cottage?" you suggested, hoping to compromise. "Sounds perfect to me," he said.
This was going to be a long summer.
For the next few days, you dream too much, don't write enough, and try to find inspiration everywhere. As you settled into the routine of staying at Cillian's, you found yourself enjoying the peaceful surroundings and his company more than you expected. The days seemed to blend together, filled with laughter, deep conversations, and stolen glances that left your heart racing.
But you also felt constantly distracted by his presence, making it difficult to focus on your writing or anything else, for that matter.
All you could think about was him.
The piano room surrounded you with its warm, inviting atmosphere, and you found yourself drawn to it more often than not. The big windows overlooking the garden let in streams of sunlight, casting a warm glow over the bookshelf. You felt the softness of the carpet as you sat on the grand piano bench, running your fingers along the keys absentmindedly.
You started humming a tune that had been stuck in your head for days, the words appearing softly and effortlessly as you played:
Please
I've been on my knees
Change the prophecy
Don't want money
Just someone who wants my company
[Hum, Hum, Hum]
Who do I have to speak to
About if they can redo
The prophecy?
The humming went on whenever you didn't know what to say next, filling in the gaps between the notes on the piano and the lyrics:
A greater woman has faith
[Hum, Hum, Hum]
I'm so afraid I sealed my fate
No sign of soulmates
I'm just a paperweight
[Hum, Hum, Hum]
Spending my last coin so someone will tell me
It'll be ok
[Hum, Hum, Hum]
The melody filled the room until you stopped abruptly, frustrated that the lyrics weren't coming as easily as before. You closed your eyes with a groan, trying to clear your mind. "Fuck," you muttered under your breath, elbows resting on the keys of the piano.
"You good?" Cillian's rough voice broke through your frustration, causing you to look up and offer a weak smile. You don't know how long he's been standing there or how much he heard of your struggles. "Just hitting a wall with this song," you admitted, running a hand through your hair.
"Ah, I see," he nodded sympathetically. He moved towards the records stacked on the shelf and pulled one out, placing it on the turntable. "I don't want to mess with your creative process or anything, but maybe a break with some music will help," he suggested.
Radiohead's "Fake Plastic Trees" began to play, taking over the room with its haunting melody.
"So you play one of the saddest songs ever?" you deadpanned, "Thanks."
He chuckled softly, "You were playing some pretty intense stuff; I figured it would fit right in."
Oh, so he did hear you.
"Ah, I know it's different from my usual stuff," you said quietly, suddenly feeling a bit self-conscious about your music. "I might scrap that one. They might not be onboard with the change."
"And why's that?"
Thom Yorke's voice faded into the background as you contemplated his question, unsure of how to respond.
You shrugged, "I listen to sad music, not make it."
"I liked what I heard," he reassured you, "and change is good. It keeps things interesting."
His low voice was soothing, and you found yourself feeling more at ease with the idea of trying something new. Pop has been your comfort zone for so long, it's what stands out of you, but most importantly, it's what sells. At least, that's what's important to the industry. Maybe it was time to push yourself out of it.
"I guess you're right," you replied, a faint smile creeping onto your face.
"As always," he said, and you fought the urge to roll your eyes. He stood leaning against the table where the record player sat, arms crossed, looking as if he had too many things to say and not enough words for them.
"Would this be a good time to ask you if everything's okay?" you inquired, noticing the weight of unspoken thoughts in his eyes. "With Yvonne, I mean," you added, nervous to bring up the topic.
That first day, when you arrived at the house, you could sense there was something going on between them. Something bad. The tension in the air was so obvious, but you didn't want to pry. However, as the days went by, it became increasingly difficult to ignore the fact that she hadn't been around or the absence of a certain ring on his finger.
"And here, I thought you were never going to ask," he replied, his words laced with sarcasm.
"I was waiting for you to bring it up," your voice trailed off, unsure of how to proceed. "I-I didn't want to overstep."
He studied you for a moment, or at least, you assumed that was what he was doing. Finally, he averted his gaze and cleared his throat,"We've separated."
A cold feeling settled in your chest as you processed his words. The reality of the situation hit you like a ton of bricks, and suddenly everything made sense. "Cillian," is all you managed to say, the concern evident in your voice.
He still wouldn't look at you. Knowing him, in moments like this, he wouldn't want to be coddled or pitied, so you save your apologies for later.
"What happened?"
He waved his hand dismissively, still avoiding your gaze. "Nothing, really," he said, his tone final. He didn't look upset, but rather resigned to the situation. "It hadn't been working for a long time; we both knew it was coming. I guess we were holding on for the boys more than anything." You could see the sadness in his eyes, despite his attempt to appear nonchalant. The weight of his words hung in the air, leaving you feeling defeated and unsure of what to say next. You don't think there's anything you can say that will make this or him feel better.
And boy, did you wish you could take away his pain with just a few words.
Cillian walked slowly over the piano, stopping in front of it. He streched his arms over the wooden soundboard, gripping the edges tightly as if seeking some sort of solace in the instrument. He finally looked at you.
"Why didn't you say anything, Cill?" you asked softly, "I would've—"
"You would've what?" he interrupted, his voice strained with emotion. "I didn't want to worry you, you have more important things than my marital issues."
You could see the pain in his eyes, and it tore at your heart to see him suffering in silence. "You're my friend. These things are important to me, Cill," you said gently, reaching out to touch his hand in a gesture of comfort. He flinched slightly at your touch, but then relaxed, leaning into your hand.
He didn't say anything, but you knew he appreciated your words. You could tell by the way his shoulders slumped in relief and the way his fingers loosened their grip on the edge of the piano.
One morning, you woke up to the wind gently rustling through the trees outside your windows. The morning light was clear and clean, leaking through the glass and falling against the walls of the room in soft patterns. It felt too early to be awake, too peaceful to disturb the tranquility of the moment.
You roll over to look at the little clock on the bedside table: 6:20 AM. It wasn't worth trying to go back to sleep, so you threw the covers and climbed out of bed, feeling the cool wood floor beneath your feet as you walked to the bathroom.
You splash cold water on your face and brush your teeth, trying to wake yourself up fully. Holding up your hair, you tie it into a ponytail while walking over the bedside table to grab your phone and airpods. You put one in your ear and hit shuffle on one of your morning playlists. You couldn't function without some music. "Keep On Loving You" by Cigarettes After Sex starts playing.
On your way to the kitchen, you walked by Cillian's room and noticed the door was slightly ajar. Who the hell sleeps with their door open? Psychos, probably. Curiosity getting the best of you, you peeked inside to see him sprawled out on his bed, body illuminated by the soft morning light filtering through the curtains—characteristic warm and cool shades revealing every hollow and speck of bare muscle. He slept with every limb stretched out, a stark contrast to his usual composed demeanor. It was a rare sight, quite poetic.
He looked so peaceful, completely unaware of your presence. So you let your mind wander.
You imagined yourself crossing the room, pulling yourself on top of him. You imagined the way his bare body would look beneath you, his chest rising and falling with each breath, his dark hair messy around his face, his skin warm against yours. His hands—rough and soft at the same time—running over your thigh, your breast, your neck. You could almost feel the heat of his touch, the intensity of his gaze as he looked up at you.
But then reality snapped back into focus.
"Fuck," you muttered under your breath. This was just a fantasy, a dangerous game to play with someone who was somewhat off-limits. But truth be told, the temptation was becoming harder to resist with each passing moment. It was all you could think about ever since he told you about his troubled marriage.
It took a long time for your heartbeat to slow. You headed to the kitchen to get some coffee, hoping that the caffeine would help clear your mind. As you rummage through the cabinets for a mug, his voice startles you from behind. "Need some help with that?" he asks, making you jump.
For a moment you thought you were still imagining things, but you turn around to see him standing there with a t-shirt on as opposed to five minutes ago. Great, him walking around shirtless in his kitchen, sleepy-eyed, messy hair, and rough morning voice would've been lethal.
"I've got it, thanks," you reply, shaking the mug slightly in your hand. You quickly pour yourself some coffee and try to focus on the task at hand: looking for the sugar.
"Sleep well?" he asks, voice still husky from sleep, his accent more prominent. He's rifling through the cabinet for a mug of his own. You can't help but notice the way his muscles flex under his dark t-shirt as he reaches up. You hum in agreement, trying to hide your blush as you take a sip of your coffee. "You?"
"Grand," he replies, pouring himself a cup of coffee and leaning against the counter. You exchange small talk about the upcoming day, but your mind keeps drifting back to how good he looks in the morning light.
"Any plans for today other than locking yourself in the piano room?" he teases, and you shoot him a playful glare. "Maybe I'll actually venture outside for once," you quip, laughing.
"How does the beach sound like?" he asks, "The boys are coming over, and they're bringing some friends, and I thought a trip would be a nice change of scenery."
"I could use some sun," you admit, feeling a smile tug at your lips.
"Let's make it a beach day then," he suggests, setting his mug on the sink. "We leave at 10, piano woman."
"Ha ha, very funny," you say sarcastically, rolling your eyes. "But I'll hold you to it, annoying man," you reply.
"Annoying man?" he repeats, raising an eyebrow. "I thought I was your favorite person."
"Only on days that end in 'y'."
•••
"Are you done with your sad boy music?"
Cillian bursts out laughing, the sound taking you by surprise. He's been playing Radiohead on repeat for the whole car ride, and you were starting to feel like you were in a melancholy music video. "I like their music as much as the next person, but I think I need a break from the sadness," you say.
"Fine, fine," Cillian concedes, reaching for his phone to change the song. The bleak atmosphere in the car lifts as "Linger" by The Cranberries starts playing, filling the space with a more pleasant vibe. Cillian glances at you, he's wearing dark shades that hide his eyes, but you can still see his stoic expression softening as he catches you smiling at the change in music.
"Better?" he asks, a hint of amusement in his voice.
Instead of answering, you start silently singing along to the lyrics, gesticulating dramatically for added effect. Cillian smiles at your antics, his own lips twitching in amusement as he watches you. The boys were so caught up in their conversation with their friends in the backseat that you were pretty sure they weren't even paying attention to the music or your impromptu performance. With a small smile on your face, you face out the window and enjoy the rest of the car ride in content silence.
When you arrive at your destination, all of you unbuckle your seat belts once Cillian puts the Bronco in park. You all pile out of the car, stretching your legs and taking in the sights around you. You close your eyes for a second and take a breath. The sea air—you loved that smell.
•••
A few hours later, after countless swims and some snacks, you find yourself lying on a beach towel, book in hand, feeling the warmth of the temperature on your skin. You're reading a book you picked up at an airport several months ago by Elin Hilderbrand, or the queen of beach reads, as many call her. You were completely engrossed in the story until you felt Cillian settling down next to you.
His hair was damp from the water, and his skin was slightly glistening. Gosh, he looked absolutely stunning. "Mind if I join you?" he asks.
"Not at all," you reply, closing the book and sitting up. "Having fun?"
"Lots," he says with a smile, reaching over to grab his sunglasses. The two of you sit in comfortable silence. The laughter and chatter of his sons and friends coming from the water redirects your attention back to the beach scene before you. You look back at Cillian, his eyes fixed on his sons.
"They love you, you know," you say softly, watching the genuine joy on his face as he watches his children.
"I don't know if I'm doing it right," he says, eyes still fixed on the boys. "I worry I might've fucked them up by letting my relationship with their mother fall apart."
He continues, "Sometimes I feel they resent me for it."
"Why do you feel that way?"
"I don't know, they just seem distant sometimes. Like they're holding back."
"Hey, that's normal for kids to have mixed feelings about their parents' separation. I was so happy when mine got divorced because it meant no more fighting, but it was also tough to adjust to the changes. It's very conflicting stuff," you say, huffing a small laugh. "Also, they're teenagers now, right? That's a tough age to navigate even without the added stress of divorce."
Cillian nods in agreement, exhaling out a yeah.
You squint against the sunlight beaming behind his head before continuing.
"You're a great dad, you always have been. Just show up and be there for them when they need you, even if they don't always seem to appreciate it. They'll remember it in the long run," you offer, remembering how much your own father's presence meant to you after your parents' divorce. "And I'm not a parent, but what parent feels like they're doing everything right all the time, anyway?"
Cillian turns to look at you. He studies your face for a moment before offering a small smile. "I guess you're right," he says sincerely.
"Fork found in kitchen," you retort, breaking the tension with a bit of humor.
He chuckles, "That's clever."
"Well," you continue, "I've been accused of many things over the years, but being unoriginal isn't one of them."
He laughs. Just like he did back in the car: a genuine, carefree laugh that makes you feel a little lighter.
"Want to go for one last swim, piano woman?"
You roll your eyes. "Will you stop calling me that?"
"Not likely," Cillian replies with a grin. "It's too fitting."
You stand up and stretch. You're wearing a one-piece teal-ish swimsuit that you swear you only chose based on comfort and not because it makes your ass and breasts look fantastic. Cillian's eyes linger on you for a moment before he looks away, and you swear you can see a hint of a blush on his cheeks. He doesn't move.
"Are you coming or…?"
"Right, one last swim," he finally says, standing up and following you towards the water.
Maybe that one last swim wasn't a great idea after all.
And why is that?
Because not even five minutes into the water, you thought it would be a good idea to jump from a high rock, and now you're sitting in the car with your knee scrapped, throbbing in pain, and regretting your impulsive decision.
•••
"You're so fuckin' stubborn."
You try to move into a more comfortable position while ignoring the pain shooting up your leg by pressing a hand against one side of the door to keep yourself steady. "And you're so clearly overreacting."
Cillian pushes his bedroom door open. He's also clearly pissed. The ride back to the house was deathly silent. Well, not silent. His sad boy music made a return, and this time with Broken Social Scene. You couldn't ask him to change the music without starting another argument. Even the kids were quiet, beyond asking several times if you were okay, which you assured them you were. Obviously a lie.
As Cillian walks around the room, you reach for your midi white beachy dress and look down at your knee in horror. It's no longer just a bruise, but a gash that is slowly oozing blood. Not as much as before, but still. It looks nasty underneath the shirt Cillian used from his car as a makeshift bandage.
He grabs the first aid kit from a shelf and turns around to face you.
"Take off your dress."
"Pardon me?"
"Take off your dress so I can properly clean and bandage the wound," Cillian repeats, his expression serious. You look down at the blood-stained fabric as if you needed any more confirmation. "Off, C'mon."
You stiffen at his demand, your body going completely rigid at his bossy tone. You watch him stride into his bathroom. He pushes aside some stuff on the counter and tosses the kit onto the counter.
Okay, yeah. He has good reason to be upset. You had no business jumping from that rock.
"What the fuck is wrong with you?" he'd said before, right when he went to get you. And now you can see the anger still simmering beneath the surface.
You can hear him shuffle in the bathroom while you remove your dress. You still have your swimsuit on underneath, but you feel exposed without the extra layer. Maybe the pain is catching up to you or the fact that you have upset him or that he's waiting for you in the bathroom to take care of you but tears sting your eyes as you try to process the situation. You take a moment to collect yourself. You cannot go in there like this, he cannot see you this vulnerable. At least, not now.
He's braced against the counter, head hung low, when you push open the bathroom door. You nearly back out to give him some space or time to compose himself, but his eyes meet yours and his expression straightens. He clears his throat and then freezes. "I—you're wearing your swimsuit."
"I am. Were you expecting me to change into something else?"
"No," he grumbles, "I mean, nevermind."
He turns back and starts grabbing sterile gauze, his movements slightly jerky. He gestures for you to sit on the counter. "Up."
"I'm not sure I can do that given my—" Before you're done speaking, he scoops you up and sets you on the counter. Your hands are locked around his neck, and his are firmly gripping your waist. They fit perfectly there, like they're made to hold you close.
He reaches behind him, both your faces close together now, and grabs your wrists, pulling them away from his neck and onto your thighs. He puts a hand on your uninjured leg, his touch gentle yet firm. "This is going to hurt." You stare at his impossible blue eyes and think to yourself: yes, this is going to hurt.
"Oh, shit shit," you gasp, gripping his forearm. "Holy fuuuck."
"I've got you, breathe," he commands, and you allow yourself to focus on his voice, letting it ground you. The antiseptic burns both your nostrils and knee as he continues to clean the wound, the pain shooting through your leg causing you to clench your teeth.
"I'm sorry," you breathe out.
There's nothing but silence in response.
"I told you multiple times not to go up there," he finally says, his voice tinged with frustration. "And yet."
"I know," you whisper, feeling guilty.
"Don't do that again," he commands, his accent thickening with emotion. "You could've hurt yourself even more."
"I know," you repeat, not sure how else to respond.
His head is bowed in concentration as he finishes cleaning the wound, his hands steady despite the anger in his voice. You can see his dark eyelashes fluttering slightly as he works. He applies a little more pressure to the bandage than he should've, and you let out a soft moan. This doesn't go unnoticed by him.
The air in the room seems to shift. His eyes meet yours, and for a moment, you see something soften in his gaze before he looks away.
"You're not supposed to like that."
Your cheeks heat up immediately.
He's gotten closer to you, your hands somehow made their way to fist his navy blue linen shirt. His body is between your legs, the delicate material of his pants brushing your skin. His breath is warm against your cheek as he leans in closer, his voice barely above a whisper. "But I can't say I mind it either." Your heart races at his proximity, unsure of what to do next.
His hands slide up your thighs, gently caressing your skin, sending shivers down your spine. He's going to kiss you, and you can't help but wonder if it's the right decision to let him.
But now is not the time to be rational about it.
"I'm not gonna stop you," you say quietly, "I wouldn't know how."
His eyes darken, pupils dilating with desire. He doesn't move.
It's like you're both aware of the line you're about to cross, so neither of you moves.
You keep your eyes firmly on his face. His lips inch closer to yours, and you feel the heat of his breath on your skin. Your body is angled towards his, hand gripping the edge of the counter. Your slightly damp hair, now cold, making you shiver.
He's impossibly hard against you, the material of his pants is thin, and you're aware of every inch of him pressing against your throbbing core.
"And I wouldn’t know how to stop kissing you," he whispers, his voice barely audible over the pounding of your heart. He shifts slightly, causing his erection to press even more firmly against you, both letting out a soft moan. His mouth hovers just inches from yours, just kiss me, you thought.
There's a knock on the bedroom door, which is, by the way, open.
"Dad?" You both freeze.
The bathroom door is slightly ajar, offering a sliver of privacy but not enough to shield you from any potential interruptions.
"Yes?" Cillian calls out, trying to sound casual despite the intense moment that was just interrupted. "We're ordering takeout, do you want anything?"
"No, buddy, we're good, thanks," Cillian replies, his voice strained as he tries to keep his composure. You hear the steps retreating down the hallway.
Cillian steps back, and the absence of his body against yours is jarring. It clearly would've been a mistake to take this further, but a mistake that would've felt so fucking good.
"We shouldn't do this."
He clears his throat. "Yeah."
He moves towards the door, his movements tense and purposeful. "I'm gonna—" he says, motioning the door.
"Yeah," you quickly reply, "I got it."
You watch him leave, the air heavy with unspoken words and unfulfilled desires.
a/n: thank you for reading! please share your thoughts with me, let me know if you guys enjoyed it :)
part two
#cillian murphy x reader#cillian murphy imagine#cillian murphy x y/n#cillian murphy smut#cillian murphy fanfiction#cillian murphy angst#cillian murphy fluff#cillian x fem!reader#cillian murphy fic
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Maybe hearing about the new trailer of the silent hill 2 remake will put my mind in gear to keep writing (a recent comment motivated me to write most of a next chapter at least), but hate this remake more than any other. I've avoided hearing or seeing anything about it because it makes me so upset and angry. I hate the trend of remaking these games. It's so shallow and a passionless money making scheme bc companies are too scared to do anything original so they go and fuck up a perfectly good game instead. From the little I've seen I'm amazed they've somehow made it look worse than the original. Sure the in game model James looks pretty busted in the original but all the prerendered cutscenes are great and then they put out this crisp ugly shit instead?? Being able to see characters' pores and having "good graphics" means fuck all if you miss the point of the story. You know why the originals were good? Because people had an idea and a passion and they had to put together something that didn't need good graphics to sell.
If anyone comes here from a03 I just want to emphasize that everything has been written and inspired from the original games. I despise the remakes and how they've butchered the original material. Everytime I see something else from the remakes I hate it more. There was nothing wrong with the original. Just fucking remaster it ffs.
Half Doomed and Semi Sweet Collection - Leon S. Kennedy/James Sunderland
When Leon and James stumbled into each other in a backwater town of Spain, they didn’t realize how close they would become over a couple harrowing days together. After narrowly escaping with their lives, they discover how they can rebuild and grow together and find themselves finding peace and comfort neither of them thought they would ever have. There’s still more adventures for them both to experience and plenty of friends to make along the way, but in they end they’ll, hopefully, get their happily ever after.
Half Doomed and Semi Sweet Collection contains Promise, Pianissimo Epilogue, and @fly-rye‘s one shots in one easy location.
Keep reading
#not saying the on the ground workers on these games are passionless its just the fucking shallowness of those above them#and even with as much love and appreciation there could be from the team itll never be the same as the original#last year when they announced the sh2 remake i legtimately cried bc it was what i feared would happen#just let it rest. let it be#i love sh and re but please just leave well enough alone#i hope the remake flops i hope they lose so much money on it#i hope capcom never remakes re0 or code veronica or does a new remake of re1 instead of a remaster#im just so tired and angry at so much shallow bullshit the entertainment industry puts out thats based soley on nostalgia and brand name#sorry if anyone came from a03 who is a remake fan#i understand its probably more accessible than the originals (i know i spent a lot of time and money getting ahold of some)#this isnt to call out anyone who likes the remakes. if you do thats fine. im glad you like them#i just want to make it clear where im coming from#these are the times i wish i could be youtube famous and do a lets play on all the originals so people have more access to seeing them#i saw remake stuff at 6:40 am and ive been writing this for like thirty minutes and keep going bc i have Opinions#^ i feel like me continuing to ramble in the tags also goes to show why my writing is so wordy. too many thoughts head full
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So apparently Skully's inner thoughts differ a lot from Jack's in the original movie Nightmare before Christmas. His behavior could be inspired by the short film "Vincent", also directed by Tim Burton, according to @myonmyon5050 on twitter (X). I'll translate the posts below because it's something very interesting to look at:
Vincent has a strong admiration for the real horror movie actor Vincent Price and is inmersed in a fantasy world influenced by horror movies. And those around him (his mother) who do not understand his dark hobbie of playing alone, urge him to play outside with his friend like a normal child. (Although there's no depiction of him having friends)
Without the understanding of those around him, he becomes immersed in a world of delusions and in the end, the difference between reality and fantasy becomes unclear. He collapses to the floor in exhaustion as the story ends. It's a dark story, but a disney story nonetheless. Not mainstream but it has received recognition thanks to Tim Burton's talent.
Vincent is a character that strongly reflects Tim Burton's childhood because he was constantly treated as "The weird kid". And the actor that Vincent admires is the same actor Burton has admired throughout his life.
Interesting thing, even with a difficult childhood, Burton managed to accomplish many things and his talent was recognized as he spread his worldview to the world. Many of the actors he used to admire ended up appearing in his films.
Back to Scully, he finally met Jack, whom he has admired for many years but is suffering from the gap between his strong ideals (his beliefs) and his reality. Perhaps in the future we'll see him develop and reach a mental state similar to Vincent's.
In a happy ending, Skully might end up spreading his worldview just like Tim Burton did.
Here's the short film if you want to watch it:
youtube
Finally, a huge thanks to the person who noticed all of this. I only did the translation. I didn't know this short film existed in the first place and that's why i was so confused about Skully's actions and opinions. His depiction of a dark and gloomy halloween with the rooms painted in black are a good reference to the images in the film. Im glad i get to have a better perspective on him from now on!
#skully j. graves#skullyjgraves#twst skully#skully j graves#skully#disney twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland#Youtube
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aaaaa!!! you opened regina requests!! i love your work sm and im so glad abt this 😭 can i request regina x fem!reader where regina's had a really bad day and she just feels insecure about her body the moment she gets home and reader comforts her and eases her worries?? basically body worship fluff (or if you wanna make it more spicy, up to you!!) i trust your brain. tysmmm <33
She will be loved
Regina George x fem! reader
Warnings: MDNI, smut. Coarse language, insecurity about body image, angst, comfort/fluff
“You can speak of anger and doubts
Your fears and freak outs and I'll hold it
You can share your so called shame filled accounts
Of times in your life and I won't judge it”
Last night, you were on the phone with Regina and something seemed off so you gave her a video call. You were right, because she told you something had happened between her and her Mom. Which unfortunately wasn’t unusual, but so infuriating because you knew what happened. It was usually one of three things— what she ate, what she wore or her grades. Of course, those were the main…quote-unquote, problems. There were always more issues in June’s opinion than meets the eye.
“Do you wanna talk about it?”
She looks at you, then away, fiddling with the hem of her shirt.
“Regina.” You insisted.
“No, I don’t. Not now, and not over a FaceTime call.”
“Okay.” You agreed, “Let me know when you’re ready. If you want to, I’ll come over, or I can pick you up.”
“Not tonight, I just— I just need to sleep this one off. I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”
The lack of a nickname addressing you at the end? This was one of her tells that she really wasn’t in the mood, or had the energy to talk. She needed alone time, to calm down and get rest. So you let her off the hook— you said good night to her and hung up. “Good night, I love you.” You said, smiling softly. She forced a smile, “Night.”
“See you tomorrow. I’ll pick you up at 7:15.”
You were expecting school to be a little rough, and you were right. She was expecting the same too. “G, why do you always get cheese fries? The other options are not all bad.”
“Just not feeling those options, Gretch.”
Well, it was a genuine question. The school food was great here compared to what you had at your old school.
“Okay.” Gretchen stopped asking and went back to chatting with Karen. Meanwhile, Regina’s brows were knit together. She seemed to be thinking, but then also…started to seem like she was in distress. “Regina.” You said quietly, looking at her.
She took a deep breath, “I’m fine.” You didn’t buy it, she was already in a bit of a…bad mood after yesterday. Every little interaction like that, it only seemed to push her closer and closer to a breakdown. “I’ll be okay, y/n.” She insisted, “I got this.” No one else at the table noticed. Not Karen, not Gretchen…just you. Her voice was quivering, her eyes— shifty, and glossy. She wasn’t okay. “Do you wanna go home?”
“Home?” She bites back a scoff, “No, thanks.”
“To mine?” You clarified.
“No.” Regina shook her head, she went back to eating her food. You couldn’t help it but keep an eye on her. Why was it so damn hard for her to accept any help? To open up? To you of all people?
After lunch, there were three more classes left. You didn’t have the last two with her so you couldn’t exactly make sure she was alright. You could only hope.
“I’ll meet you at your locker after the last bell. okay?” You pecked her cheek.
“Okay, baby.” She smiles softly, then evidently biting the inside of her cheek before she turned to leave. You usually had no problem being away from her but when things got tough, you hated that. You would spend all day, everyday with her if you could. “Hey.” You hear Regina behind you as she tapped your shoulder. Turning around to face her, your greet, “Hi. Let’s go?”
She nodded silently as then took her hand in yours and walked out of school with her. Regina sits in the front with you, like she always does. Except she was just sitting there and staring into space— another bad thing. You had to get her out of that god awful place in her mind.
“Regina, you know this. We gotta talk about it.”
“What’s there that you don’t already know?” She asked, defeated.
You shut your bedroom door, gesturing for Regina to sit down. She does, letting out a sigh as she looked up at you. Her gaze follows you as you moved towards her and sat down in the spot beside her. “I’ll be fine, you know. Always happens, I just need to deal with it until it blows over.”
“What happened, Reg?”
She wanted to scoff but bit back, “Well, you know my mom.”
Of course.
“It’s the same thing, every time, y/n.” Regina replied through gritted teeth, the annoyance within her bubbling up to the surface. “Everytime. ‘Regina, maybe you shouldn’t wear that. It’s too tight, it doesn’t look good.’, ‘Regina, leave the cupcakes alone. You’ve had enough food for the day. We gotta watch what we eat’, ‘Regina, have you worked out today?’ I am so sick of it.”
You gazed into her eyes as she revealed all of that and more to you. “She’s been like this my whole life. Why am I still not used to it? Why am I still listening to what she says? I know it’s no good for me, but I just— I can’t stop thinking about what she’s been feeding my mind for the last eighteen years.”
You grabbed her hands and held them in yours, giving them a squeeze. Tears were starting to fall from her eyes…she was blinking profusely, trying to get rid of them, flustered. “It’s okay.” You assured.
She shook her head, sniffling.
“Regina.” You repeated, “It’s okay. Let it out. All of it.”
“When I was a kid, she used to make me finish my plate no matter what.” Regina exhaled shakily, “Then when I got older, I listened to my body, you know? I stopped eating when I was full but she’d tell me I was wasting food if I threw out what was left on my plate. I didn’t want her to get mad, so as pissed as I was, I finished my plate. I was pretty active, so it didn’t really affect me. Middle school, puberty happened. My body changed.”
Wiping away her tears quickly, she continued, “And I always held more weight somehow. Well then, you know what. My eating habits got bad and I’d go days at a time without eating. Then it was the opposite. Now I’ve just been trying to heal from all of that but she’s been making it hell for me and sometimes I cannot do anything but feel like shit for a few days then get back to normal. We’ve been together almost a year, we’re off to college next year. We’re going to be adults but I’m still plagued by childhood problems. It’s ridiculous.”
“It’s not ridiculous.” You told her, leaning down to catch her gaze, “It’s not. You’ve been putting in a lot of effort to get better and anyone would be stupid to not see that.”
“Really?” She scoffs, “Even when I have days where I literally do nothing but cry about what she’s told me years ago, or do even worse things, because of her?”
“Yeah. Even then. It takes a lot of strength and courage to push through all that, and pick yourself back up. Which you do, every single time no matter how hard it gets.”
Her frame seemed less tense by the time she stopped talking. With your thumb brushing over her knuckles, you said, “Regina, I need you to remember that I’ll always be here for you. Not just for the good things, for anything. Tough, sad, infuriating. Anything at all. You are not alone. I’m your partner.”
She looks at you, tears welling up in her eyes again.
“I know it’s hard, I know why so you don’t have to keep explaining yourself. And I know it seems like I’m offering nothing but companionship. But that’s sort of what a partner is. I’m here, to keep you company. No matter what life throws at you.”
Another deep sigh falls from her lips before she goes, “Thank you.”
“I love you.”
A pink hue tinted her tear-stain cheek as she tried to hide a smile. “I love you so much.” You added on.
“I love you too.” She squeezed your hand in return.
“And you know I’d do anything for you.” You smiled while your hand rested on her thigh.
————
Regina tensed up slightly at that touch. A harsh exhale was heard from her as you smirked to yourself. “Anything…” Your finger traced her pale skin. You looked up, meeting her eyes once again. Regina had that look, she wanted this. She wanted you. “To prove it.”
“Do you want me to make you feel good, hm?” Your hand relocated onto her cheek, cupping her face. Like a switch has flipped, she immediately gave in to the temptation and nodded eagerly. Her eyes closed and you leaned in to capture her lips into your own. Fleeting kisses were swiftly followed by longer kisses…ones of desire. A whine slips from her mouth in the midst, sending a rush of heat that pooled between your own thighs. You’d back her up against the headboard, she sat with her legs naturally spread open while you straddled her, your knees on either side of her hips. You hands were grabbing her face, lips having never left hers since they latched on several minutes prior.
Regina whimpers this time. You chuckled, “You want more?” It was a little amusing to see her reduced to nothing but meek little noises when under your control. You loved it though, having slightly more dominance over her than typical. And well? She loves being beneath you, that’s for sure. Her head rolls back on reflex, inviting you to work her neck over. And expectedly, when you’ve hit a certain little spot, you’ve earned your first moan. Smiling to yourself, you continued your action until she got louder and squirmier. “Fuck.” She cursed.
Your hand moves down south, grabbing a handful of her breast without having to look. Regina panted, the air right by your ear tickled you and sent a shiver down your spine.
“Take it off.” She grumbled.
“As you wish, baby.” You smirked, reaching back underneath her shirt and unclipping her bra before you detach yourself from her and removed her shirt then got the bra out of the way. Your lips resume its work along her neck, your fingers play with her tit on one hand. You tug on the teat, and she gives you a pretty high pitched moan. “Does that feel good, honey?”
“Yeah—” She says, you didn’t even let her finish that word before you pinched that hardening tip between your fingers. “Shit.” You climb off her, pulling her pants down on the way after getting a hurried nod of approval from her. Settling yourself down between her legs on the mattress, you wasted no time and ran your tongue up and down her slit. Already, she was breathing heavily and you saw her groping her own tits for more stimulation.
“Don’t be shy, now.” You chuckled, thumb moving to rub her clit at the same time your mouth worked. Regina flinches, a muffled noise comes from her. “Don’t hold back, Regina.” Your free hand massaged her thigh, “I want to hear you, baby. I wanna hear how good I’m making you feel.”
The strokes of your tongue quickened, becoming firmer and more purposeful. Your hand on her clit then shifts and you instead slide two fingers inside her. Regina gasps, and flinches. Her leg moves out of position slightly but it remained that way, her body gradually getting overcome by increasing pleasure. You two digits pumped in and out of her at a leisurely but consistent pace, making sure you hit her g-spot everytime. That, sends a shock through her body without fail, making her head spin in pleasure. You feel her fingers combing through your hair roughly, keeping your head in place. Your brows were raised briefly but you carried on, “Fuck, right there— right there—” Regina whimpered, strained. “Don’t stop—”
“Mmkay, baby.” You hummed, keeping at this exact pace and place for awhile. You feel her wetness on your chin, but you couldn’t care less. You were lost in the moment, feeling her writhing beneath you, hearing her making all those noises for you. You were drawn to her like moths to a flame, your only priority now was making her feel good and making her come, worshipping this beautiful body of hers. Worshipping every single inch of her.
“You’re so beautiful.” Your mouth and fingers left her entirely, then you clambered back up to meet her face. “You’re my beautiful girl, aren’t you, Regina?” Brushing her cheek, you gave her a smile as you broke away from the kiss. You pulled her down carefully so she now laid on her back, you reattach your lips to the spot on her neck and started to kiss your way downwards…covering every bit of her exposed skin with a smooch. “Fuck—” She whined, “F—I need you, I need you. y/n—”
“Answer the question, Regina.” You smirked, fondling her tits while hovering over her. She kept quiet so you grabbed at the flesh harder, forcing the lewd noises out of her mouth, followed by impatient nods, “Y—yes— yes— oh, fuck—”
“I’ll be right back.” Kissing her once more, you got off her and then the bed.
“Baby, come on.” She grumbled.
“Just getting the strap, babe.” You winked, “Be patient~”
Regina exhales exasperatedly, looking at you while you walk to your closet and put on the harness behind its door. You’ve gotten her all hot and bothered already and you were absolutely enjoying yourself at this moment. “Open up, baby.” You tapped her thigh and she did as you told her to. Dragging the tip of the shaft along her throbbing cunt, the whining and whimpering from her resumes. “Aw.” You teased, “Are you ready, darling?”
“Yes— yes— oh my God…” She swallowed thickly, nodding her head while she kept looking at you. She knew you would ask for eye contact, so she did it first.
“Please, do it, please.” Regina pleaded desperately.
“Oh, good girl.” You smiled cheekily, lining up the tip of the shaft with her entrance. You were swift, pushing into her before she could say anything. All you heard was a low moan when you entered her and gradually bottomed out. “You okay, baby?”
“Yeah, yeah, I am.” She replied in a whisper, unintentionally whimpering at the end. You retracted and pushed into her more forcefully, a whimper just erupts from her throat like that. Hearing her just spurs you on, you went faster and faster, plus her noises matched up with your movements. It quite literally feels as though you were ascending into a whole new dimension. The noise of both your skin hitting each other’s, combined with the wetness? Whatever it was, it was obscene and had you weak in the knees. But, you persisted. Your hand was on her knee, pushing that leg of hers up as you continued railing to her. She was babbling��curse words, your name, incoherent noises. Goddamn. Her mind was one clouded mess, miles away by now.
When Regina’s back arched off the mattress, she exclaimed, “Oh, fuck!”
You looked at her, slightly worried, “You okay? Do you want me to stop?”
“No, no, no, no, no, no.” She gasped, “Don’t— don’t stop. That feels so fucking good, baby. Keep going— I’m so close— so close—”
“Alright~” You smiled, relieved and eager, “Don’t hold back, Regina.” You resumed your consistent motion of impaling her, watching her face contort, watching her eyes roll to the back of her head. “Fuck, fuck, fuck…” She babbled in a daze. “Let it all go, Reg. Let it all go.”
“God, you’re insane…” She panted, breathless.
“You’re the one gushing now and I’m barely doing anything anymore.” You retorted.
“God, keep going.”
“What?”
“I want more, keep going.” Her voice was airy, soft. “Keep going?”
You nodded, giving her what she wanted and completely disregarding the state of your sheets. “Oh, you’re so hot, baby.”
“Fuck’s sake.” Regina chewed on her lower lip, “I— I need your mouth— God, fuck—”
Once again, you went along with her happily, pulling out of her then promptly diving back into her cunt, tasting every last drop of her. And yet, she just kept spilling into your mouth. At this point? You couldn’t care less if you drowned. “Damn.” You chuckled, “How far can you go?”
“Push me.” She ordered.
“Well, since you asked…” You shoved your fingers back inside her, assaulting her sensitive spot while lapping her up without complaints.
Somehow, her pitch got higher, making you giddy. You feel her tightening around your fingers rapidly, and you kept going to push her over the edge again. She came, and she came hard. She even backed away a little, so you immediately stopped. That was it, she didn’t want more and you knew. It’d been discussed— if she backs away like that, you’d stopped.
With a tentative hand on her thigh, you shushed her, trying to help her find her breath again. “You’re okay, I got you. You’re okay.”
She nodded, “I know, I know. Oh— my God, I love you.” Hiding her face in her hands to hide the blushing, you brushed her hands away when you crawled back up to lay down next to her. “Look at me.” You held her face in your hand, pressing a soft kiss to her lips. She does, and you continue, “I love you. sometimes your mind’s gonna try to convince you otherwise…but, I really, really do. I love you so fucking much and I never want you to forget that.”
“After all of that? I won’t ever be able to get you out of my mind.” She jokes, her usual smirk on her face.
“I mean it. I love everything about you, every little bit of you. Just like you do me. You are perfect the way you are.”
Regina kisses you back, snuggling closer to you. “I know you do, and I promise. No more of that ‘keeping things to myself’ next time…I’ll try my best to talk about it, with you, or with a therapist.”
“And if you ever need to get away from your house, please don’t hesitate to come over to my place. Please. Come over here yourself, or call me, or text me. Anything.”
“Roger that.” She smiled just slightly, which turned into a smirk. “Also, you are freakishly good at whatever that was. Never came this hard in my life.”
“Well, you also did more than that, but…anything for you, eh?” Your fingers traced along her arm. Regina chuckles, “Oh, I’m just as shocked as you are. Sorry about the mess.”
“I’m not sorry, Reg. They’re just sheets.” You laughed, rubbing her back. “You wanna take a shower? Freshen up?”
“That sounds nice, sure.”
“Alright.” You got up first, then pulled her up, “Let’s go.” She smacks you on the ass while you walk ahead of her, entering the ensuite bathroom first. You gasped, “Regina.”
“I think, it’s only fair that you get your turn too now.” She whispers into your ear, sending a chill down your back. “Do you want that, baby girl?”
🏷️Tag list:
@ashecampos @auliisflower @cheesysoup-arlo @frogs00 @ludoesartandstuff @pda128
💭A/N:
So…my first Regina x reader smut 🫣
#renee rapp#regina george#mean girls 2024#mgmm fics#regina george x reader#x reader#reader imagine#reader insert#gxg#wlw#character x reader#queer fiction#comfort fic#fluff#angst#mature topics#anon requested#lgbtqia#queer fluff#mixed genres#queer#lesbian#thanks anon
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Seven Minutes in Heaven:
Summary: At a party you’re dared to go inside a closet with Billie where she confesses her feelings for you
Warnings: fluff 🙃
————————————————————————
Lively chatter and laughter echoed throughout the house as you stepped inside. People greeted you with smiles and friendly embraces. Yet your eyes were searching for your best friend, Billie, who had said that she was attending tonight’s party.
“Y/N!” the familiar sound of Odessa’s voice caught your attention. She gestured for you to come over. As you stepped closer, you could see that she was not alone. Sat on the couch with her were Claudia, Finneas, Zoe, and Billie.
“Hey, guys!” you greeted them.
“Here, Y/N. Take my spot,” Finneas said as he moved up to sit at the arm of the couch. With a smirk, Billie patted the now open space next to her, and you sat down.
“Hey, you. Glad you could make it,” Billie murmured softly as she wrapped your arm around your shoulder, giving you a one-armed hug.
“Thanks. I am, too,” you said with a smile.
It was actually Billie who had invited you to the party. While it wasn’t in your plans to go out tonight, you decided to go. It was also saw excuse for you to see her and spend time with her.
In a perfect world, Billie wouldn’t just be your best friend. You saw her more than just that. But never in a million years would you ever say it to her face. She’s Billie motherfucking Eilish. She’s already sought after by so many, more beautiful and attractive and interesting than you… why would she pursue you in the first place?
“How about we play Truth or Dare?” a partygoer slurs, whom you were unfamiliar with, and everyone either nodded or verbally voiced their opinion. A few other people who were nearby joined in, forming a small group around the couch.
“Alright.” Billie rubbed her hands together, her eyes glowing with a mixture of excitement and mischief. “Who wants to go first?”
The first few truths or dare consisted of Finneas drinking liquor out of someone’s boot, a guy and girl kissing, Zoe reading a salacious text message she sent thirty minutes ago, and Odessa revealing who she would kill, kiss and marry from the group.
“Y/N, truth or dare?” Finneas asked with a mischievous gleam in his eyes.
“Dare,” you replied, surprising both yourself and the group.
Finneas smirked. “I dare you to go inside the closet with Billie for seven minutes.”
“What?” you gasped, feeling the color drain from your face. You swore that you were hearing things. At first you thought that Finneas was joking, but his smug expression said otherwise.
“Finneas!” Billie and Claudia exclaimed in perfect unison.
“It’s not funny,” Billie chided, slapping her brother’s arm.
“It’s just a dare, chill,” he defended between laughs. He then looked at his sister. “Unless you’re scared.”
“I’m not scared,” she snapped. If looks could kill, Finneas would be lying dead on the floor by now. She then stood up and looked at you, her eyes looking directly at yours with an intensity that almost left you without air.
Slowly, you nodded and stood up. A chorus of laughs and jeers from the group filled the air as the both of you made your way to the closet. Your heart was beating out of your chest. The door closed shut with a soft click of the lock. Billie was staring at you, biting her lip, and she took a cautious step forward.
“Billie, wait…” you began but Billie gently shushed you.
“Calm down, Y/N,” Billie murmured, her hands firmly on her shoulders. “I’m not going to do anything if you don’t want me to. In a way, Im glad this happened. I need to talk to you about something.”
“Alright,” you said softly. She then outstretched her hands, her ocean blue eyes silently pleading for you to take them, and you did. They were warm and comforting, and it made your heart flutter.
Billie took a deep breath before speaking. “I’ve had my eye on you for a while now, Y/N. And… I know you’ve had your eye on me, too.” She stood a bit straighter, keeping her composure yet the nerves were still evident in her eyes. “If you let me, Id love to take you out sometime. But that’s only if you want to.”
You were so stunned you couldn’t speak. In all your years of friendship, you had never seen Billie so vulnerable until now. Her confession made your heart swell and relief washed over you knowing that the feeling was mutual between you and Billie.
“Say something, Y/N, you’re making me nervous,” Billie chuckles awkwardly and you smile at her.
“I’d love to, Billie,” you said happily, making Billie visibly relax. Ever so gently, she pulled you into her, her hands on either side of your waist. “Why didn’t you ever say anything before?”
She chuckled softly. “I was scared. And everytime I tried to flirt with you in the past, you took it as a joke. So I stopped. I always thought you just saw me as a friend.”
“Oh, Billie…” you murmured, wrapping your arms around her neck.
“One minute, guys!” Odessa yelled from the other side of the door, causing the both of you to laugh.
“Only one minute left… what to do?” Billie mused, her tone playful, brushing her nose against yours.
You smirked. “I can think of something.”
“Oh, yeah?” Billie’s smirk mirrored yours as you slowly leaned in and closed the small gap between the two of you.
The kiss was soft and tender, speaking all the words of your newfound love for each other in a single gesture. Billie deepened the kiss as she held you tighter, her warm tongue brushing over your lip, and you parted your lips ever so slightly. But she didn’t dive into the opportunity, instead she trailed kisses along your jawline, and you moaned softly. Your eyes fluttered closed as she went down your neck, your collarbone, her hand delicately kneading your ass—
“Time’s up!” Finneas’ voice pierced through the blissful moment, making the two of your jump. Yet the two of your laughed, gently pressing your foreheads together.
Billie rolled her eyes playfully. “That jerk.”
“That went faster than I thought,” you said with a giggle, and Billie chuckled as she pulled away from you slightly. She kissed your forehead, letting her lips linger there for a moment before steaming another quick kiss from you.
“We’ll finish this later, baby,” she promised with a wink, and you couldn’t help but blush.
#billie eilish#billie eilish blurb#billie eilish x reader#billie eilish x fem!reader#billie eilish fic#billie eilish fanfic#billie eilish x you#billie eilish imagine#billie eilish fanfiction#billie eilish fluff
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it is kind of funny to me that of my current tattoo wish list not one but TWO are plants relating to my (deceased) grandmother. and then the third is a plant relating to DISCWORLD. maybe i ought to just find a way to tie in all of my interests to fruits and florals. build a garden of ink that doesn't Have to mean anything if i move on but Could continue to mean things
i think i am going to get a teeny tiny blueberry tattoo on my wrist :)
like this but on the inside of my wrist
#nobody's gonna be like. oh my god colorful lilac tattoo? you dumb bitch discworld is so passé!! etc etc.#not that im worried abt other ppl's opinions moreso that i grew up wanting a harry potter tattoo so so bad and i am SO glad#to be a solid zoomer bc i just know if i was born any closer to millenialism#i wouldve been old enough to get an OBVIOUS hp related tattoo and then to live to regret it#so like. ok so if discworld explodes (somehow?) oh man i just have a pretty lilac tattoo#sorry i have put too much thought into this for someone who doesn't even have One yet let alone like . a thematic collection to worry abt#i just like when things are cohesive and well planned and account for all possible outcomes... hence my agonizing over tagging systems etc#like im not gonna get this tattoo w/o planning how it would go w the OTHER ones i want. sorry 4 being crazy
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broski I beg of u to tell me about your Danny is Clark’s nephew wip im so intrigued
@hailsatanacab also asked about this one! I shared two snippets for them so check out Part 1 and Part 2. (about 900 words total between the two asks.)
This was inspired by the discussion on a prompt you made ages ago, actually! Here's the post. The main prompt isn't the inspiration, however. It was the comment about Danny joining the JL and [insert spiderman meme here].
Let's see if I have anything I can add. (I changed things enough when posting the first bits that everything else I have doesn't fit anymore.)
Eh, fine. Just went through and wrote another 600 words.
-----
Danny winced. “Yes, Uncle Cl— Kal. Uncle Kal.” Danny glanced next to him and realized Constantine had moved several feet away and was deliberately trying to not attract attention. He bit back a smile and pulled on the Prince Phantom persona Queen Dora had forced him to learn. “Thank you for your assistance, Laughing Magician. I now declare our deal complete and will make no further claims on you.” He waved his hand producing a piece of parchment which he handed over. “As promised, your payment.”
Constantine grabbed the paper and backed away quickly. “Great. Glad to do business with you, your highness. Hope your family reunion goes well. I’ll just—” he jerked a thumb over his shoulder, then changed something and disappeared through a portal even as several of the League members present tried to yell at him to stop.
Danny rolled his eyes as he fell back into his more relaxed demeanor. “Oh, please. What more did you want from him? I’ll talk to Uncle Kal and he can decide what is important to pass on. Magician Constantine already told you most of what he knows.”
“Just… come on, Danny,” said Uncle Clark. “We need to talk.”
---
Finding a place to talk to Danny wasn’t the problem, Clark quickly realized. Shaking off his coworkers, however… Bruce in particular did not want to be left out. And Wally was too curious to be put off.
“Danny?” called Clark when he realized the kid wasn’t with him.
“By the viewing window,” said Bruce. “He seems to enjoy the view.”
“Right. Should’ve guessed.” Clark cursed himself silently for forgetting how much the kid loved space. “Batman, please. I know you like to know everything. But can I just talk to my nephew alone? I’ll explain everything I can after, but I need to know how this situation could’ve happened in my own family without my knowledge first without you being there inserting Opinions.”
“Very well. I’ll collect Flash and we’ll leave the two of you alone. But I expect a full report after.”
“I’ll make a peach cobbler, Ma’s recipe, and head to the Manor tomorrow to tell you everything.”
“I’ll let Nightwing know.”
Clark sighed. “I’ll make two cobblers.”
Bruce’s lips twitched upward, but he turned without saying anything more. “Flash! Since this matter is going to be delayed, I believe you still have to file your report on the incident last week.”
Clark chuckled as Flash protested. But he didn’t listen to their discussion, instead joining Danny by the viewing window. He settled an arm around his nephew’s shoulders. “Beautiful, aren’t they?”
“I can’t believe you get to come up here and look out at the stars any time you want.”
“I don’t get up here as much as I’d like, I’m afraid. And when I am up here, it’s because something somewhere is going wrong so I don’t get to appreciate it as much as I’d like to.”
“So, if you’re an alien, does that mean Dad’s an alien, too? Is that why he is the way he is? Am I part alien?”
Clark laughed and ruffled Danny’s hair. Like this, it felt almost insubstantial, like passing his hand through mist. “Fraid not, kid. No one knows why your dad is the way he is. I can’t remember how often he was tested for the meta gene.”
“Once a year every year from the time he was six until he was twenty-two and graduated undergrad and started living on his own. Then he stopped for a few years. Until he started dating Mom. He accidentally broke her apartment door once and she insisted he get tested again.”
Clark wanted to laugh, but all he could remember was Danny’s earlier statement. “Danny… Are you…safe with your parents?”
-----
Again, anyone is free to continue this! If anyone wants, I can combine everything into one post to make it easier to do so.
#dpxdc#danny fenton#clark kent#danny is clark's nephew#clark is danny's uncle#first time writing clark pov#hope there's no glaring errors
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a message from 13 year old you ‧₊˚✩彡 [letter] 💓🍬
this is a general reading. take what resonates and leave what doesn't. scroll through the images & choose based on your inner guidance and gut feeling. ⛓️ *・῾ ᵎ⌇ ⁺◦ if you feel guided to: tip jar💘 ✧.*
Pile one ‧₊˚✩彡
"what did I tell you? I always knew it would work out in the end. I was always knew the pain wasn't going to last forever. It hurt to be treated that way by the people closest to me, especially the women in my life. there was always so much confusion growing up. people would say pretty things but there body language would show something else. I felt caged in my connections. But I always had some faith. I always had a feeling that the universe was watching out for me... for us. that it was sending us signs. that eventually I would be able to enjoy life to the fullest without feeling guilty for it. without feeling like I had to compare myself to the versions of me that they wanted me to be. I hope you know now that those versions don't exist. that we weren't born to be dolls for other people to dress up and control and shove words and opinions in their mouth and to gargle and spit back up. I doubted my intellgience so much.. underestimated my creativity. but looking at you now.. looking at us... I feel so proud. dont forget about me please! I always believed in you. even on those days where you couldnt stand to look in the mirror. I was on your side this whole time, its just that sometimes you werent listening. But now looking at you, you are everything I ever wanted to be. Im so glad I didnt give up. You deserve it all. the world. your dreams. im rooting for you. heres to more blessings and abundance."
Pile two ‧₊˚✩彡
"remember the way everyone would make fun of us for the weird things we did? Our odd expressions and the questions we asked and how we laughed out loud and our desire to see the world. how it always labeled as silly. I know it had made us dull our self expression for a little while. How we forced ourselves to shrink down, to fake laugh to the mean comments, or "oh this? not a big deal" or "its not that good.." so many of those... just to blend in better with our friends and family at the time. to make them like us. to see if that would make them stop criticizing so damn much. I hope we no longer are letting comments like that slide. I hope we dress like the way we always wanted to in our head but were to afraid to wear out. I hope we didn't let the world extinguish our playful nature. life felt like heartbreak after another. what do you know about love? youre just a kid. they deformed the way we saw it for a long time. but not anymore. It makes me emotional.. the way you never let go my hand. and how you always carried me along with you in your heart. Of course, now you call me your inner child. Or I guess inner teen. Ha, inner tween. Thank you for always being my friend. I see now that you are always what I was meant to be. Out of all the stars in the sky, we shine the brightest, you and me."
Pile three ‧₊˚✩彡
"you are so beautiful... wow we really are so different now. But I still see hints of me in you. in your smirk and your mischievous laugh and in your questioning glances and sharp stare when someone gets a little bit too close to our personal space. I admire the way your presence can make someone nervously glance away. I use to feel so powerless.. so many things I did to try to gain some control, even if it meant hurting myself and pushing away the people I love. I love how vulnerable you are. I really did see it as a weakness but looking at you now, it makes me realize how brave you are. of putting yourself out there despite the uncertainty. of taking that chance even if could end up badly. even if you could end up with a broken heart it seems like you no longer find sastification in staying in the darkness. I understand, its.. well, lonely... being alone. Do you think you could take me with you? That part of you... that is still afraid. do you think you could tell me? tell me that I am not broken or incomplete that there is nothing wrong with me. that I am not the worst thing that has ever happened to me or will happen to me. Reassure me? Tell me that some things we have to do even when we are afraid. that its terrifying and nerve wracking and makes our palms sweat. but then once we do it, it's glorious, it's liberating, it's everything we have ever dreamed of and more. I see it now. Take me with you. Do you see me? I see you. The way you look at the world and want to devour it. I see you now, with a crown atop your head. how you wear it so gracefully..."
Pile four ‧₊˚✩彡
"So many times.... I was so close to giving up. to listening to that little voice in my head that kept telling me over and over again that there was no point. that the feeling and the ache in my chest would last forever. that it was always going to be me versus the world. me versus me. that everything around me would always be dull and gray and that I would always be blue. I doubted my self-worth so much. It was practically non-existent. I still do in some ways now when I pop up and invalidate the way you feel, shrugging my shoulders wondering if maybe we are actually deserving of this happiness... of this success. it feels foreign. like its not really mine.. well, ours. We're not in a really good situation right now and my parents are trying to hide things from me that im just too big now to pretend not to notice. they don't make me feel that protected anymore. and that hurts me a lot. whose gonna take care of me now? Im so glad youre here now. Im so glad we got to grow up and that we survived. and im so glad that now that we survive we can actually live. Thank you for reminding that we can let go now. that theres no room for a pity party anymore. thank you for letting me know that your'e not going to leave me behind. thank you for keeping my memory alive. thank you for looking back at me with kind and loving eyes. but most of all, thank you for fighting for me. I know I can easily lie and say "everything is fine" but thank you for showing me that it eventually it is. thank you proving to me that eventually I will say its fine. its okay. its great even. and that I, that we, actually mean it."
© plutonianeris
#pac#pick a deck#pick a photo#pick a picture#pick a pile#astro tarot#astrology#intuitive reading#pick a pile reading#pick an image reading#self growth#self help tarot#daily tarot#tarot#plutonianeris#pick a card reading#pick a deck reading
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Hi! I always love your analysis and thoughts on chnt, so i wanted to ask if you have any one the "fruit fly that died by starvation/we only see sydney eating when elijah feeds him" parallels. I have some of my own, but frankly they're much too scrambled at the moment to make any sense. Have a good day!
THANK YOUUU IM SO GLAD YOU BROUGHT THIS TO MY ATTENTION BECAUSE OHHHH OMGOMG… you are onto something… okok I’m gonna rope Adam and the apple incident™️ into this too, since I think it’s the only other time we see Sydney eat anything…
If we’re analyzing this through the “hunger/ food as a metaphor for love” lens and trying to find meaning in these specific instances…
Jedidiah offers Sydney no food, they never even eat together anymore, Sydney says he misses it… the fruit fly dies of starvation, empty and alone… Jedidiah simply never thought to feed it. He loved it. He thought that was enough.
Elijah offers Sydney butter cookies, something much sweeter than what he’s used to— both the gesture itself, and the food in question. They sit across a table and have breakfast together while Elijah rambles on about some very concerning thoughts and behaviours— interspersed with declarations of love, compliments, etc... It’s sugar coating, its sweet-talking, sweetening the deal so that Sydney’s takeaway from the interaction is a conflicting blur of “nice, new & sweet” and “creepy, overwhelming & confusing”. He knows Sydney will come back, because Elijah is the only one feeding him, and the sweetness masks the taste of the poison!
And then ADAM!!! Adam offers Sydney an apple with a centipede hidden inside… Adam presents himself as a therapist, as a friend who cares, who’s there to help! He offers Sydney food, challenging Sydney’s refusal with the line “you’re always hungry!”… but it’s a Trojan Horse type situation. He has harmful intentions hidden beneath the surface, but you’ll only realize that once you’ve already bit off more than you can chew!!! What was offered to you as a nice and shiny apple ends up containing a centipede that you’re now forced to chew through (centipedes, in my opinion, symbolize danger/ threat or some similar concept in CHNT).
Somewhat tangential at the end here but what do yall think about Adam being an auto-cannibal through this perspective because I have many thoughts…
#ramblings#camp here and there#chnt#camp here & there#ch&t#sydney sargent#sydney o sargent#elijah volkov#elijah chnt#Tem chnt#jedidiah a a martin#jedidiah martin#up and Adam#up and Adam chnt#Adam chnt
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(sorry for my bad english!) hii! I found your account and i want to tell you that your stories are, like, a GREAT comfort, the few you have are, it sounds weird but, in my opinion reading stories (or writing) about abusive relationships is an escape route to avoid falling into those relationships in real life, I mean, i read them and i get the adrenaline because of reading it instead of living them dhfjkshfsk so yes, they are also very, very well written <:
can i ask for a story where Connie is a little older thanreader, and constantly manipulates her with the excuse that he knows better and reader believes him, because, for a long time, he was the only older figure she had, something like that, I don't know. , bonus if reader cries hysterically in his arms (his fault, of course, he slapped her or something)
i really agree with your take on the whole writing about traumatic relationships because that’s how i feel. i’ve been thru so so much and i know it’s different but this is most definitely how i cope, im glad someone else can relate to me especially during these times i’ve felt so alone💗 you english is beautiful by the way, thank you 😊
tw: grooming - reader was 17 when she meant 24 year old connie / mental abuse / physical abuse - from connie and from readers dad / very mean and manipulative? connie / unestablished relationships / not proofread
such a baby
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“really thought you were over that stupid shit y’know, (name)?” he looks down at you, sitting on the floor at the foot of the bed and spits, “you’re still just a fucking kid.”
he hates it when you cry. you know he does, he knows he does, so you don’t know why it feels like him making it happen is always his main goal.
you sit there silently looking up at him as he scrolls on his phone. after a couple minutes he puts it down and looks down at you.
“you’re gonna have to find a place to go.” your eyes widen all the more and you feel your heart beat quicken. it scares you when he says stuff like that. find a place to stay? where could you possibly go? you feel like you’ve been with connie so long, he’s taken care of you for so long…
“w-what?” you get up suddenly, trying to ease your way into his lap. you’re get even more nervous even harder when he meanly pushes you away, you pretty eyes water.
“c-connie..! hic wh-what— how will i—?” you can’t even finish your sentence you’re so shaken. you really can’t help it, you can’t imagine any life without connie. how could you? he’s the one that took you in, he’s the one that knows exactly what to do when you don’t, he tells you what to do when you’re just about to make the wrong choice. he’s shown you what love is when nobody else could.
while you’re breaking down crying you can tell connie’s losing his patience by the second, he’s getting up waving his hands all type of ways getting all in your face, yelling all types of nonsense.
“dammit (name), shut the fuck up, y’know i hate that crybaby shit, go fix yourself before i do it for you” when you don’t shut up he doesn’t give you a second warning, just slaps you clean across your face. you damn near fly across the room from the impact, connie’s just so much stronger than you.
“—oww ..!” your body shakes as you try to lift yourself up, your crying even harder now. “y-you’re a liar…! you said—you said hic you were d-done hitting me—!”
he stomps over to you, eyes wide and mad while he starts dragging you by your little arm to the front door, “who the fuck do you think your talking to?! i don’t owe you shit you know that, little girl?!”
connie goes to open the front door, “i’m fucking tired, (name) i’ll sleep like a fucking baby without your fucking crying tonight—”
when you don’t stop he freaks out a little more. he hates when you don’t listen.
“think i fucking won’t?” he gets louder, “think i won’t put you out this fucking house, right now?! i don’t give a fuck what time it is—!”
connie drags you back to your shared bedroom and starts ripping your clothes out wherever he can find them and putting them in so random bags, while you cry and hyperventilate. he doesn’t give one fuck, to him you deserve this shit. you’re always running your mouth.
“who got you all this shit, huh?!” he moves on to the vanity and starts packing all your cute little jewelry, breaking some in the process.
he stops for a second and just looks down at you. veins popping out of his neck as he screams, with the bag he’s stuffing all your belonging in tightly gripped in his hand and that mean look of sternness in his eyes, you realize just how how much older connie really is. just how scary he is. with him being 7 years older than you and all, you’ve always put connie on the high horse, always seen it as a flex. but you don’t think you’ve ever really seen it until now. how truly scary he can be.
“you wanna go back, (name)?” he takes a deep breath. “you wanna go back to that shit everyday? living in that fucking house, getting treated like some fucking shit?”
you sob when he finally lets go of your now bruised arm. he goes to sit on the bed.
you were 17 and connie had just turned 24. it was late out when you ran away from home. you were sick of it. your dad was terrible to you, all the yelling and screaming and the bruises—you couldn’t take it anymore. connie was one of your friends older cousin, you had meant him at her birthday party and you think you fell in love. he just seemed so…mature. at the end of the night when he saw you all alone, he went up to you and asked if you were alright. turns out your dad was pissed so he didn’t pick you up. connie couldn’t be more excited to hear that shit. cute little shy teenager, and she’s got daddy issues? he hit the jackpot. he ended up taking you home and giving you his number, in case you ever, “needed anything.”
you’d call connie whenever, no matter what. he always knew exactly what to say.
one night your dad blacked your eye and you called connie. connie showed up 8 minutes later and came barging in, beating the shit out of your dad. that was the last night you heard from your dad and the last night you ever weren’t by connie’s side. you’ve been living with him ever since. you’ll never forget that first night he held you in his bed. he whispered about how everything would be ok and how much he’d take care of you. and you believed it.
it’s been only 2 years since then and connie’s still that ever so cool senior that you look up to. you love connie to death and you don’t think you ever won’t. he knows you’re completely dependent on him now too, he thinks he'll always use it to his advantage.
“you’re such a baby.” you look up at him and he nearly melts, he wants to fucking ruin you. you eyes are all glossy and swollen from crying, your lips are stilly wobbly from the wailing, and your tears—don’t even get him started on the fucking tears.
connie thinks about how perfect you are.. you’re already as naive as you could possibly be, but the age gap just puts it more in his favor.
you look in his eyes to see if that gaze is still there…you know, the loving one even after everything, and it is.
“i love you….” you whisper it like it’s a curse, anxious for his answer.
connie smiles and kisses your forehead watching you light right back up just from the small gesture.
“i know you do.”
#connie springer#aot connie#connie x reader#tw toxic relationship#toxic connie#tw dark content#tw grooming#physical abuse
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So Yan!Harper is a little different because it has been heavily contributed to by several people including:
@asylumdweller | @these-bees-r18 | @pip-n-chips | @degrees-of-fuck
(and the asylum group chat)
And all others around the community!! I want to thank you all for feeding my freak obsession and im glad this has become like a group project!!
(PS: tag your own yan head cannons pretty please. Dude a freak I love him)
Just Harper head cannons!!!!
SFW ones first:
Obsessed with you. Not possessive but still wants you to be focused on him.
Really into dolls especially customizing them with clothing and hair accessories. He's definitely got one of you that no one can ever touch or look at because it's very special to him.
Speaking of Harper being crafty he's also into sewing! He's very good at tailoring things to your measurements, he has them memorized by now. It's not creepy he's just thorough.
Has made you a custom straight jacket.
Embroidered your name in his sleeve so he can look at it whenever he's bored.
Absolutely was the worst child, other kids in the neighborhood feared him and that is why all the images of him as a kid are of him alone. he's also got pictures of you though. They're just hidden.
Will gaslight you for no reason. He just likes seeing you confused and worried when you think you've missed your appointment. don't worry he'll make an exception. you're just going to have to owe him a little favor that's all (:
Will drop anything to make room for appointments with you. Will also ditch work for you as well. He would make house calls but Bailey is pretty strict about Harper being in his territory and Harper isn't prepared to fight Bailey.
Will make you sick on purpose to keep you close by. This is either physically sick or mental (he only makes you mentally sick if he wants to keep you at the asylum)
Harper is constantly sticking things in you so he can lick/chew on them after you leave.
He is convinced that every action you make is playful and flirty even if you're trying to attack him. He just thinks of you as his feisty little lover and you just need a little extra attention that's all.
When you're actually sick he's extra helpful, he prefers you like this. Weak and needy. He pets your head calls off any appointments or seeing any patients and he just sit's with you. Making sure you feel better.
Harper takes care of all your needs. Check-ups mental health care surgery. No other doctor can touch you he's made sure of it. You also can't get a second opinion.
Prefers using drugs/hypnotism to keep you in line. Man isn't strong and even though he could call security it's not ideal for him to get others involved in your little ‘couple fights’
For surgery, harper is always there for you. Before and after he's very attentive. Makes sure you know everything you need to and he's very good at making sure your recovery goes smoothly (even if it takes twice as long)
he's always very clean even if you're a mess. He likes the dynamic of the two of you together. He likes it when people think he's out of your league because it adds to his abuse of power kink
Man has breathing issues around you. He tries to hide it. Biting his lip. Holding his breath. Just trying to control his breathing. None of it works. Man wants to huff you like a junky huffs paint.
Even if you are in a proper relationship with Harper he gets really petty and upset if you don't address him as ‘doctor’
don't play games with this man. He is the worst sore loser and even when he does win if you are close to beating him he's bitter about it. Might even hypnotize you to make you worse. He doesn't care if it affects other parts of your life. Competitive and petty
Any time you punch/bite/mark this man he's enamered with the marks. They are a little present from you to him and it's not like you could ever really hurt him so he sees it more as a little lovers trophy than an attack
NSFW
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will absolutely voyeur you but he is always particular about it, positions how people touch you how they act around you It is all very carefully choreographed even when he gets other people to fuck you it's all very staged and sterile in a weird way that doesn't even feel like sex lets be honest.
Prefers getting his sexual frustration out on you but likes it better when you're hypnotized. (He doesn't like to be associated with pain or discomfort unless it's for a purpose)
Has a file full of images of you naked, broken, on the verge of tears, fucked out of your mind, even ones where you're just asleep. He files them all carefully and studies them all he really wants to get ‘the perfect picture’ of you that captures everything you are. he's not even sure if it's possible but he's going to try.
Get ready for everything you wear/eat/smell/sleep on to be covered in harper cum. Especially at the asylum where he's in charge of everything. he's got no shame and he really wants you to be accustomed to him and everything he does.
Cockwarming at the drop of a hat. He needs to do paperwork. Guess who he's assigning as his little helper? you're too tired to get up from bed? Not a problem for Harper he can stay in bed with you. At the farm and he has a moment alone with you while he gets things ready? His pants are already off. You can't escape it. Harper loves having his dick in you at any time.
Chugs a vial of aphrodisiacs before your appointments with him so he's the correct amount of horny for you.
Will also feed you aphrodisiacs and then deny you any sort of stimulation until you're begging or crying. The dude really wants you to earn things from him when you're lucid so you think it's all your idea
When you are hypnotised definitely makes you do some really nasty things for him. he's really into the idea of you being into everything he is and even encouraging him to do things to you when you're asleep/passed out. it's like getting consent but he's putting the words in your mouth and having you spit them back up for him.
Has sex with you during surgery. And if he can't do that he at least jacks off during it. He can't help himself he really needs you.
Man loves gaslighting you about your past sexual experiences. he's a big fan of convincing you that you're just an exhibitionist and it's normal. You just like things super rough and with a little more practice you won't be feeling so guilty about it anymore. And surprise harper is here to help!!
Will jerk you off as therapy. If you enjoy it your making progress if you don't next time he's going to get a vibrator
Very body-focused he's interested in pushing you to your absolute limits and making things difficult for you. Wants you unable to focus/form words/be able to move.
Prefers it when you're squirmy during sex but not outright violent.
Absolutely loves forcing you to cum. Not a fan of edging though. Not unless it's some kind of punishment. The dude will make you cum in your sleep during surgery when you are hypnotized, hands-free when you're fully dressed. Mans a freak for it. He also likes it when you sit on his lap or thigh while he forces you to cum. You'll get a lot of praise if you do it of your own volition.
Harper drinks piss. At least once bro look at him.
#Harper the doctor#Degrees of lewdity#Tw blood#Tw surgery#Tw hypnotism#Tw dubcon#Tw noncon#Tw rape#yan dol#yandere#tw yandere#yandere tropes#gn reader#x reader
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final finale thoughts!!
things i loved about the finale
QUEER GODDESS PATHEON YEAAAAAAH!!! i thought it was such a good way to find a happy medium between kristen committing to a worldview that felt authentic and nuanced without being catholic™ about it
everything to do with the scene of Ankarna trying to offer retribution to each of the bad kids, and each of them making peace with past wrongs instead of continuing to stew in it. i love growth!!!
FIG AND KRISTEN MIRRORING ANKARNA AND CASSANDRA
everything to do with mazey and fabian. of all the fantasy high couples aside from fidayda, these two feel the most like they make sense together- they have similar interests, they have similar values, fabian had a crush on her even when she was being 'uncool' (eg. twister) and how mazey actually picked up on that and appreciated the way he used his perceived coolness to extend it to others who might be picked on otherwise. this is the couple i most hope go the distance even post aguefort adventuring academy (again, aside from figayda ofc but i literally cannot imagine those girls breaking up over anything)
fabian's fetus sibling outnemesising him despite fabian building an animosity towards them the whole season before they were even conceived. peak fantasy high insanity
controversial but i thought the maryann/gorgug being introduced and canonised in all of 15 minutes was hilarious. it was very teen of them in a way that felt authentic. my ideal scenario for them is an end of year fling that becomes amicable exes bc they truly have nothing in common beyond thinking the other is hot (real of them) but i dont have a strong opinion on whether they should break up or not
also maybe controversial but i like that kalina is straight up bloodthirsty. she felt like an equal opposite to bakur- rather than being a devoted servant who became corrupted by proxy, she was trying to corrupt her deity into a form she preferred. thematically it extends to the complementary opposites thing ankarna and cassandra have going on (though i get it might be a reach).
"... thats a four. you know what it's for we don't have to talk about it"
squeem
riz coming in clutch with the character arc right at the last moment. i joked ab his neuroticism being part of his natural swag, but im glad murph not only made sure riz FINALLY addressed the way he was burning himself out, but also that by extension, he was burning out both fig and kristen bc riz has a very calculated idea of 'success' and while he had the best intentions, those two dont fit neatly into it
THE HOLD PERSON OVER THE LAVA??? RIZ'S 'very good on paper, but no practical application."??? i screamed
a second blimey-related divine intervention roll by K2 leading her to getting pinnochioed into a real straight british girl, in real non-dnd britain, is the best thing thats ever happened in fantasy high. a simulacrum was so powerful brennan had to do the dnd equivalent of sending her to a barn upstate.
adaine and aelwyn talking about killing their mother over icecream can be something that is so personal...
siobhan's incredible play with the earworm??? phenomenal, i gasped out loud
fig maybe moving into fabian's house even after she drops out so fabian won't be alone again... what if i threw up blood actually
i liked kipperlilly copperkettle being confirmed to be rotten to the core. 'the ritual looks very different when one accepts rage willingly' GOOD!!! i like evil ambitious teenage girls who try to burn the world down to get what they want. i get why they didnt bring her back, that detail definitely cemented her as in the zayne/penelope category of 'past villains who could possibly be redeemed'
FIG AND AYDA MY LOVES!!! sorry but not even the lesbian goddesses are doing it like these two. brennan put his whole pussy into creating ayda aguefort and my life has been changed forever
zac once again dming K2's alternate universe campaign
things i hated
ik it was payoff to the running bit and it made me cackle when it was revealed, but the implications of hallariel and gilear having a baby are so bad to me. fig talks up gilear a lot, and sure, he came around to being a good dad to her, but gilear has objectively been a shit stepdad to fabian and hallariel... is hallariel. its got to sting was watch your mom be basically catatonic for your entire life, and then suddenly prove that she was capable of being an present mother the whole time- just not for you. im hopeful that senior year will address this though!! lou has always been so good giving his characters' weighty emotional arcs that feel satisfying
i dont like the implication of trackerbees getting back together. i never thought bladebees was good beyond a realistic rebound, but trackerbees was SO codependent together, i dont think its a coincidence that kristen had her best emotional intelligence moments when forced to think things through on her own. tracker always struck me as kind of a 'fixer' type, like she feels most comfortable with someone she can act caretaker-y to (hence bouncing off kristen to another girl who had similar issues). i really reaaaally hope they dont regress back into their s2 dynamic
ruben's memory wipe. i thiiink the implication is that those who were the most willing to follow through on porter's orders maintained more of their memories bc they were in control of themselves and those who didn't were compelled into obedience (which might be why ivy and oisin remember more), but it wouldve been nice to actually see the lucy/ruben close friendship brennan said they had with him sobbing and apologising to her
it felt very weird that kristen didnt get some kind of resolution to her yearlong gentle prodding at bucky?? i think ally got sidetracked with the possibility of kristen getting back together with her ex that it kind of slipped from their mind (maybe bc to them the ankarna vision of her upbringing was kristen resolving her feelings towards her family but still), but considering all of elmville was coming apart, i feel like bucky's faith could've been swaying into doubt pretty easily. idk maybe bc ive become a trackerbees hater over the season but it felt annoying that that was what ally focused in on and not their character's more meaningful relationship with her little brother
#dimension 20#fantasy high junior year#fhjy#fantasy high#riz gukgak#adaine abernant#fabian seacaster#gorgug thistlespring#figeroth faeth#kristen applebees#fhjy spoilers#squeem
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hi!!!i wanted to do a request (im shaking as i write this bc this is my second time ever doing a request-) about Kayn having a crush on a reader that's part of Pentakill.Reader looks super mysterious and scary but in reality they're just shy and also have a crush on Kayn and both of them confess at the same time.Take your time and have a good day!!!
I am so glad you requested it! It's okay to be nervous! I AM SO SORRY IT TOOK ME SO LONG I LOVE YOU AND I APOLOGIZE <//3
I LOVE THIS PROMPT- especially for someone who is in Pentakillllll like that is so exciting. I am so hyped for this! I hope you enjoy <3
Content / Warnings: Mature language (the 'b' word lol), Alcohol consumption. Not much else really....
Word Count: 1883
Kayn was never one to show his fanboy nature, even though everyone in Heartsteel already knew Kayn had a secret obsession- Pentakill. Specifically, the bands mysterious, cold and ominous bassist; you.
You on the other hand, although already being the bassist in a rock band, had somehow gained a reputation for being the "dark" or "moody" bandmember in comparison to Sona or Kayle. In reality though, you just liked keeping to yourself, rarely being the first one to speak, often sitting alone on the stage speakers or out back of the concert houses having a smoke before or after a show.
Regardless of the publics opinion of you, you loved your bandmates. You were just shy, so when Kayle approached you notifying you about a possible collab with your personal favorite band Heartsteel, you couldn't help but be incredibly anxious.
"What do you mean we are 'meeting' with them tomorrow," you inquired, glancing up from your book to see Kayle lean against the kitchen counter and take a drink from her cup.
"Oh, come on Y/N. Don't you like... oh which one was it?" She pauses and you take in a deep breath before letting out a sigh. "Kayn, right?"
You sit up from your spot and set your book down. Arching your brow and rolling your eyes at the winged woman, you chose to ignore her inquiry.
She scoffed before saying a little quieter, "Well Yone said Kayn likes our bassist. Guess it's not that big of a deal. I'll tell him we will pass on the meeting."
She began reaching towards her phone on the counter, causing you to pause mid-stretch and jump up to stop her.
"Wait!" you shrieked, cringing at yourself immediately thereafter.
"I knew it," Kayle smirked. "Our meeting is at noon by the way." As she walked away, you slumped back onto to the couch and let out another dramatic sigh.
~~
Kayn was going to kill Yone. Rhaast on the other hand was threatening to constantly break through at any moment with sheer excitement.
They were meeting Pentakill today. They- more specifically- were meeting you today. He was terrified. What if you hated him? What if you thought he was weird, or worse- what if Rhaast made an appearance and said something outrageous or out of pocket?
Kayn shook his head and rolled his eyes before splashing his face with water. He stared at himself in the mirror for a moment, silent dialogue only heard by him plaguing his mind.
Do not do anything brash, Rhaast.
Oh, I would never, Kayn.
~~
The meeting wasn't long. There was clearly some sort of friendship history between Yone and Kayle. Beyond that, everyone chatted like long lost friends aside from you - always silent and observant, and Kayn who sat at the large meeting table across from you.
You didn't fail to notice how he consistently stared at you. You were lowkey jealous because you wished you had started first. You weren't about to have a staring contest with him now.
You hadn't realized you were dissociating into the wall next to the large bay window until you were snapped out of it by Kayle's voice.
"Y/N, did you hear me? We are going to partner up for our song collab." Her lips rose in an evil knowing little smirk. "You and Kayn will be working together." Damn her for playing teacher right now.
A blush immediately erupted on your skin as you glanced at Kayn and gave him a shy smile. He let out a dramatic sigh and you were ashamed to think you were actually excited to have a real excuse to talk to him for an extended period of time.
"Alright everyone, let's start today and you can all figure out arrangements for your individual meetings. We will have our group meeting biweekly. Once we have a song, we will figure out our practice schedule and all the other details!" Yone smiled politely and everyone began standing and walking to their partners. As you observed, you saw both sett and K'Sante give looks to Kayn as they passed by him, almost teasing.
You couldn't help but be mortified by their social ques. Had Kayle spilled the beans about your silly little crush on Kayn? Oh Gods, what if Kayn knew and was staring at you because he was wondering how the hell he got stuck with the quiet freak from Pentakill as not only his partner, but his crush.
You sighed inwardly as you walked slowly towards him, looking anywhere but his direction. He was more confident than you thought, looking straight at you as you could see through your peripheral and starting the conversation.
"Hello, Y/N, right? I guess I should introduce myself- I'm Kayn," he reaches out a hesitant hand. You smile politely, shyly, in response.
"I'm Y/N- well you already know that anyway, heh..." you stutter, flustered due to the close proximity between the two of you. You give another awkward smile, and then let out an exasperated breath before continuing. "So, when and where would you like to meet up for these brainstorming sessions?"
Kayn seems to pause for a moment, putting his hand under his chiseled chin in a thinking pose. His gaze leaves you for a moment, before returning to your own.
"Dinner, you pick where you want to go. I will schedule if you send me the name of the restaurant. Here, put your phone number in my phone," he pulls his phone out of his pocket, unlocking it and handing it to you. You raise your eyebrows in surprise, not even second guessing the dinner suggestion. There's no way he could be asking you on a date, right? No, you're not delusional.
You input your number and quickly bid your farewell as Kayle waves at you from the door. You hadn't realized everyone was gawking at the two of you as they waited to leave for the evening.
~~
"You know you don't have to do this at dinner Kayn? May as well have asked her out at that point," Sett smirks at him from his seat on the couch.
I told you, Rhaast hissed in Kayn's mind. It's too obvious now.
"Nah, don't worry. It is just a lunch between colleagues to brainstorm for a song. Nothing more, nothing less." Kayn glares at Sett, before walking into the bathroom to spray on some cologne for the first time in a very long time.
~~
You were so nervous. Even more nervous than you had been previously. And when you get nervous, you babble.
So before leaving for dinner with Kayn that evening, you gave yourself a pep talk in the mirror.
"Do not say anything stupid." Yeah, right.
"Do not be a clumsy mess as per usual." Will probably stumble trying to sit in the chair.
"Do not be ominous and awkward." Can't change your nature, baby.
Gods, your inner dialogue was a bitch.
You had chosen to wear casual yet flattering attire to your dinner, sticking to your usual all dark fabric and accessories. After getting ready and checking yourself out in the mirror once more, you went outside and got on your motorcycle with your backpack slung over your shoulders.
Letting out a shuddering breath, you began the not so long journey towards the restaurant. You had suggested one close by that you did enjoy, although the nerves in your stomach suggested you probably wouldn't be doing to much eating.
Upon arrival, you hung your helmet on the handle of your bike and stepped off. Before heading inside, you spared a glance at one of the windows only to see Kayn openly gawking at you stepping off of your ride.
Unbeknownst to you, he was thrilled to see you on a motorcycle. It was a thing with him, something about being rebellious or dangerous compared to the norm always caught his eye.
Quickly averting your gaze you let out a deep sigh to ready yourself and walked into the restaurant- ignoring the hostess and walking the corner to seat yourself in the booth across from Kayn.
Placing your backpack on the bench next to you, you let out a breath.
"Hi, Kayn," You smiled politely, your voice quieter than you had intended.
"Hi, Y/N," He smiled back. This evening his expression was eager, his eyes alight with dare you say- mischief. And you couldn't help but notice the slight blush that caressed his cheeks under the yellow lighting of the lamp above.
"So, do we want to order first or get right to business?" The question tumbled out of your mouth casually, and it took you a moment to realize that you actually felt quite comfortable sitting across from him in this moment.
"Well, I already ordered us both a drink. I hope you like Gin and soda," A gulp audibly escaped his throat and your lips twitched up in an almost smile.
"Actually, one of my favorite cocktails. Thanks, Kayn."
Gods, he liked the sound of his name on your lips.
The evening went on without a hitch, the two of you talking casually. By the time a few hours had passed, your food long since finished on the table in front of you, you realized you hadn't actually gotten to any brainstorming.
The drinks had started getting to you, loosening up your nerves. Before you knew it you were blabbering on and grabbing your backpack to pull out your notebook.
As you were looking down, Kayn was staring at you.
Just tell her, you coward. Rhaast was yapping again, but the booze had Kayn tuning him out. He was planning on it anyway.
"Sorry, I knew if I spent this much time with you I'd end up talking too much. Must be because of how much I like yo-," you paused. Were you saying this out loud?
You heard Kayn pull in a sharp breath, before softly saying,
"That's interesting. I was just trying to hype myself up to say that I have had a crush on the cute bassist from Pentakill for awhile now. Please tell me I didn't hear you wrong..." Kayn's eyes were wide, one eyebrow raised as he bit his lip.
Your jaw fell open, before you promptly closed it and blinked a few times.
"Wait, really?" You smiled. You couldn't help it. And as Kayn looked at you, he knew all of the assumptions the public made about you being dark or ominous or mysterious were bullshit. You were like starlight shining in a dark sky with that smile.
"Really. I swear it. Yone and Kayle I think did this specifically to set us up, actually. Everyone else on my side has known I've liked you for awhile. Lucky for us Kayle and Yone have... a friendship." He grinned sheepishly, running a ringed hand through his pink hair.
You laughed out loud then, having had made the same assumption yourself. "I thought the same thing!"
And as the night waned on, the restaurant eventually closed and the waitress was forced to kick the two of you out. The drinks had worn off over the time you had been there, opting for water instead.
As the two of you walked down the steps back to your motorcycle, Kayn looked at you and pulled you in for a hug. You melted into him momentarily before he released you.
"So, I have a request," he stated. You nodded for him to continue, your brows scrunched in question.
"Can I have a ride on your motorcycle?"
~~
The End! I hope you LOVED IT AND AGAIN IM SO SORRY FOR THE LONG WAIT! I have basically been AFK irl lately lol. Thank you for the lovely request!
#Heartsteel Kayn x Reader#Kayn x Reader#Pentakill Reader#Pentakill League of Legends x Kayn#League of Legends x Reader
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miss fairy cosmos sometimes I see a nice post and I have to fight SO HARD to not be a hater. just saw one saying "I have never seen anything more beautiful than the sunlight" and I had to take deep breaths and count to 10 so I don't share my contrary and unnecessary opinion. anyway. I love you
stop this happens to me all the fucking time. like i know good and well this positive and beautiful and generally uplifting post is well-intentioned and not all-encompassing but i am literally in the depths of grief and mental illness in a way that is genuinely ruining my life forever and stopping to look at the sunlight is not going to change that especially when i am deep in one of my episodes. and seeing platitudes like that can fucking burn you out when you're in that headspace like makes you feel like you're going to implode. but i just sit with the rage and scroll and think hey that's a beauiful sentiment and i'm sure it helped someone. and if i'm still annoyed i write about it in google docs or scream or something. it's really hard to do that but yeah i know what you mean by not wanting to share a contrary unnecessary opinion. you're right and you're also right about everything else. the rage and sadness i mean LOL. i'm right there with you. know ur not alone in that and im glad you're able to take a step back and cool down when it happens even though everything fucking sucks and is agonising. that shows a lot of self-awareness and like, emotional maturity fr. love ya too!! <3
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