#give tarlos their own show

[funfairofgames]

Tbh, it isn't TK's job to analyze all of Carlos' body language when he is severely heartbroken over the death of his mother and relapsing.

It is Carlos' job to be honest about his feelings with his Significant Other.

Carlos may have had a connection with Gwyn, but Carlos even said when he was kidnapped, "No son loved their mother like TK loved Gwyn." A connection with an in-law you've known for a year or two as an adult isn't comparable to the connection of being loved and cherished your whole life by a mother.

TK cannot solely rely on Carlos to be his support system because he has never lost a parent nor has he ever been an addict and it was selfish for Carlos to want to be TK's sole supporter. He doesn't understand what it's like to want to self-harm to numb away the pain, he doesn't know what it's like to accidentally go into cardiac arrest in an attempt to numb the pain. The constant depression and anxiety that is apart of Addiction. TK cannot skip meetings to talk to Carlos about things he cannot advise him on. TK especially can't skip meetings just to have dinner with his boyfriend. *It's better that he misses dinner than getting high before dinner.* Carlos knows is from what he said he read on Google. I'm very happy that Carlos learned in the end that he cannot play hero and fix mental health problems.

I'm happy Carlos learned that TK's sponsor, Cooper, is a tool to be used or like a therapist and is not a friend. I'm happy Carlos gained enough self-esteem to not take TK's needs outside of him personally.

I feel like in the whole "TK should have let Carlos in more" discourse, people are missing the fact that Carlos wasn't letting TK in either. He had plenty of opportunities to express his feelings and he didn't. He could have just told TK that he was feeling left out or that Cooper was making him feel insecure. But he kept pretending that everything was fine until TK came home to a passive aggressive solo dinner, which made TK (!) start the conversation. TK had spent the last however long it's been since the drugging going through withdrawal, the trauma of being drugged against his will, AA meetings every single day, grief over his mother, grief over his lost sobriety, and a multitude of twisted up emotions that he was only just beginning to understand, and he STILL found the strength to open up a dialogue when Carlos wasn't willing to do it. He should get a little credit.

I've sat on this the majority of the day so I could come up with a response that made sense bc honestly I've been waiting on an ask similar to this since the discussions started. It really got away from me too so all my points after 1 can be found under the cut.

1st: I never took TKs credit away. I've said I know more than once that he was trying. He actually had a conversation instead of running away, he heard what Carlos said, he came home instead of going to a meeting etc. They were in some ways communicating. So to imply that I haven't given him that is not fair.

2nd: was the dinner passive aggressive? Sure. But let me just say, I would've done the same thing and have done the same thing to my husband more than once. After so long of cooking for 2 and cooking for 2 on a regular basis, when the other party (a) quits eating with you and (b) blatantly disregards your cooking even tho they KNOW you cook every night and don't bother to tell you they're not going to be eating with you, you get tired of it. Does it always get expressed clearly? No we're human and sometimes we want them to feel like we feel. So no I'm not going to find fault in Carlos for doing this when I've done the same. Plus it made TK really see him for the 1st time in who knows how long which I'll address in a later point.

3rd: I disagree that Carlos wasn't willing. He asked about Cooper. He tried to have that conversation with TK about his meetings about not knowing things. Had TK been paying attention he would've picked up on the nuances of his expressions and tones, he would've known Carlos was feeling things that needed to be duscussed. Did Carlos explicitly express his discomfort? no. But Carlos strikes me as the type that he's not going to say anything bc he knows TK is going thru a lot and he's not going to add to his burden. He's going to deal with his feelings on his own. And when TK blew him off about going to meetings (and yes that's how I saw it. Carlos was offering all this support and TK blew him off as if he didn't want it or need it bc he had other people that understood better) that's going to cause Carlos to shut down too. He's going to internalize even more bc TK is coming off as uncaring. Carlos is seeing the love of his life struggling and he wants to help in any way possible. He wants all of TK. But he also sees he's not getting it. He sees TK coming home late, he sees TK not eating with him, he sees TK being happy and lighter after meetings and spending time with Cooper and he doesn't know how to handle it without making TK feel bad about it so he internalizes and tries to handle it himself.

4th: TK isn't the only one going thru all these messy complicated tangled feelings. Let me remind you what all Carlos is going thru too:

Idk that Carlos was close with Gwyn, but he called her Gwyn when he still couldn't call Owen anything other than Capt. Strand. So I'm gonna say they had a connection deeper than what we saw on the show. He lost her too. But he's going to push that aside for TK bc its TK's mom. But I can guarantee Carlos feels her loss too. (I'm thinking about my dad and my aunts in this scenario when my grandfather passed away 4 months ago. Their feelings werent any less than ours just bc they're the in-laws in the scenario. And Carlos's feelings shouldn't be any less than TK's) Carlos's feelings surrounding Gwyn’s death shouldn't be just pushed aside either but the show/writers are really good at doing that.

Carlos was put on leave for a death on the job. Was it ultimately his fault? no. But I can guarantee he's still carrying that with him bc even tho we got to see him work thru some of that with Grace it wasn't a magic fix it all.

Carlos was also drugged and we have YET to see how Mr. Control Freak handled that. Sure it's worse for TK bc he's an addict that's having to go back thru and work for his sobriety and I feel for him. So much. But that doesn't excuse him shutting Carlos out. They both were victims in their own home once again and they should be dealing with the consequences together.

Carlos is dealing with all of this and feeling guilty that TK was put back at day one. Bc if you remember how he was after the house fire, he's going to be blaming himself for not figuring Sadie out sooner and for not protecting TK from her.

So you wanna talk emotions and feelings in the relationship? TKs not the only one going thru things.

5th: I've rewatched the "fight" scene and I'm sorry but I didn't like how TK handled it. No communication isn't their strong suit, they've proved that multiple times. And I HAVE and will continue to give TK credit for sitting there trying to talk about it instead of running. But my main problem with the dialogue of it is (a) TK just assumes Carlos is upset bc he thinks he's cheating. But he should know Carlos better than that. (B) he should know how Carlos is a fixer and how he takes on everything and how he finds fault within himself for everything. So (c) him telling Carlos point blank he wouldn't be enough isn't fair. Yes TK knows what he's like as an addict and he knows what he needs and that's fine. But it's not fair to not give Carlos a chance to understand. He's clearly been shutting Carlos out of the whole process and this conversation or "fight" feels like he's going to continue to do that without understanding where Carlos is coming from. He might say Carlos has all of him. But I don't see it or believe it anymore than Carlos did.

6th: I think you're discounting Carlos’s strength as well. Yes it took a lot for TK to say what he kinda said. But also had TK been paying attention to begin with, he would've picked up on Carlos’s feelings sooner. He would've seen Carlos was struggling just as much and it could've been addressed long before the passive aggressive dinner fight. But I'm going to venture out to say, TKs not been at home a lot. And when he does come home it's probably just to sleep bc he's obviously not eating with Carlos. I'm going to even pose the thought that he hasn't even bothered checking in to see how Carlos is handling everything bc he's worried about hanging on to his own sobriety and I'm sorry but that's slightly selfish when you're in a relationship. So Carlos even broaching the subject after TK brought it up and sharing his feelings knowing he's going to upset TK when it's the last thing he wants to do took a lot of strength as well. Bc he told TK exactly what he was feeling and how he was questioning his place.

Lastly: TK made the effort to come home instead of going to a meeting at the end, so why not just take that extra step and let Carlos be there for him? That was related more to his grief than his addiction in my opinion and there's no reason he couldn't have turned to Carlos in that moment. I've expressed my feelings on everyone grieving differently and needing that time to yourself but at the same time if he didn't want Carlos’s comfort why even come home? Yes he was making the effort to let Carlos know he heard him the other night, but besides coming home what did he really do? Make Carlos feel even worse that he made TK feel like he had to come home when he so obviously didn't want to. The writers handled that whole scene wrong in my opinion but it was nice to see what Carlos learned about TK and how he handled and applied it and was able to take that step back and give TK what he needed.

If you made it this far than kudos. I've tried to express myself over the last 2 days without bashing or hating on either TK or Carlos bc really I fault the writers for a lot of things and choices made with these 2 characters. But this one felt like it needed a lot of explaining on my part and I'm not meaning to bash TK or come across that way, I'm just countering your points with things I found wrong in the episode and things TK could've handled better.

[bucksdaffy]

today i'm thinking about how tim minear saved the henrentommy scene from the cutting room floor and sent it over to abc so that they could release it. when you think about it on its own, it's not really that special. tptb do that fairly often with their movies and shows: they save some extra content and include it alongside the official cut on dvds as a bonus feature. it's nothing out of the ordinary.

but this is tim minear we are talking about.

the same tim minear who, after 7x06 aired without the extended version of the buck and eddie karaoke scene (which angered a lot of buddie shippers to the point of sending him death threats), went on record to say that although he isn't really hesitant to share deleted scenes, it is something that has negative connotations for him. because last year, when he finished and released some 911 lone star scenes that were excluded from the finale, the fandom was furious that they were cut in the first place instead of enjoying the extra content. in the same statement, he mentioned that the reaction had left a bad taste in his mouth and so he wouldn't be doing that again.

given the context in which he said that, it's really hard to blame him. after all, he's human too, and it must suck ass when you release something you took your precious time to finish, thinking the fans would appreciate it, only for them to react negatively. he wasn't willing to go through that again. end of story.

except, he did do it again.

tim experienced backlash from both tarlos fans and buddie fans for not doing things their way. nobody would blame him if he didn't want to make the same mistake with bucktommy fans. but tim is sanguine. he is optimistic. he took a chance on us. he saved the scene from the cutting room floor, finished it, and sent it over to abc, knowing full well there was a chance that bucktommy fans would lash out as well. i like to think he was fairly certain this time would be different, though, due to all the positive interactions he has had with us. but at the end of the day, this is something only tim knows. the point is, he decided to risk it one more time. and i have to say, it makes me incredibly happy, and for once, i am really proud to be a part of something like the bucktommy nation. we may have a few bad apples, as all fandoms do, but as a whole, it is such a positive community. we appreciate all the content we get. we don't harass people for not giving us enough. we understand why the story goes the way it goes. we see how certain scenes don't necessarily fit with the narrative flow of a given episode. we are able to think critically. and all these traits are something that creators really do appreciate. i can only hope this continues until the end.

[paperstorm]

Re: your tags on the proposal gifset - Oh I so feel that way too!! Like yeah this show is silly and they might not know how to use a calendar but what it has already given us?? What it will still apparently give us??? Gahhh truly, fans usually can only dream of stuff like that this show canonically given us with Tarlos!! So many things/tropes I previously didn't even dreamed about or liked and now here I am!! 🥹🥹 your tags just made me so emo wtf 😖💕

It’s given us so much more than I even could have imagined I’d get to see on a tv screen with my own two eyes 🥺🥺 I have been feeling very grateful lately

[sageandred]

My Favorite Tarlos Details from 5x05 "Thunderstruck"

super late &...

didn't do this last week, but wanted to jot down the things I acknowledged + loved

Therapy:

how Carlos overthinks the question, "how are you doing" while TK takes it at face value; they're both right and wrong in their assumption but ultimately it shows their personalities & how they often think (this is a guy who made his own 5-star restaurant for a guy he wasn't dating vs a guy who made many life decisions in a couple hours after his near-(bus)death-experience and one of them was: they "make a good team").

TK kept up a hobby: softball (presumably continuity to s3's episode); Carlos is so obsessed he has no time for hobbies BUT he wanted to take up one with TK ❤️

"sexytime"-so TK/very in character

I also appreciate that TK corrected to "OUR" sexytime when Carlos reassured it wasn't a slight to him in bed

how Carlos recognizes TK's support, and the way TK completely understands (particularly the way it's shown in the convo with Tommy) Carlos' struggle even in his frustration; that's exactly them: that there's so much love even when there is some conflict

It's nice that nearly every episode has highlighted something Carlos is giving in their relationship, even when we know they're going through hard times. Even during this episode where that is a main focus, but they throw in reassurances, still, with Carlos cooking "the best comfort food my people have to offer"

Heart 2 Heart:

TK's grief shown in a different way as time's passed (by going to Tommy when missing his mom's advice)

Tommy struggling with alcohol connects her both to TK and Carlos even when they're comparing Tommy's work comsumption to Carlos'. TNT similarities always live on

The Compromise/Resolution:

I've already expressed how much I love the final scene, but one thing about how Carlos comes to the conclusion/the catalyst for his effort I can appreciate is how all it takes is the sister saying "a brief that my boss has already sent back to me to redo"—The point is Carlos may never find his dad's murderer and he doesn't have to give up his search, but all of that could turn into being for nothing in a moment's notice and thus -> "I'm done wasting [every second I get with you]."

also love that TK's attempt to hide a giant guitar in it's case is holding it behind his back as he speaks FIRST (also: gift-wrapping it & based on the shape, there's not much it could be (they are 1-in-the-same ❤️)

[thisbuildinghasfeelings]

The Police Station Scene

Arguably the most important season 1 Tarlos scene (it won the poll, after all!), the police station scene in 1x03 is undoubtedly iconic. The sheer chemistry between these two becomes truly apparent, and the journey they take throughout the scene...I have no words. Or perhaps I have many words. Yes, I think it's that second one. Many words. Under the cut, my analysis of this excellent scene.

We start out with TK in a pretty miserable situation. On top of everything else he's going through, he just got arrested, and at this point, he's not sure if the guys he fought are going to be pressing charges. For all he knows, he could be ending up in a jail cell using his one phone call to get Owen to come bail him out, something that Owen will probably not be too happy about. Not only that, but he's bleeding and his face clearly hurts judging by the ice pack he's holding to it. He's having a very bad night.

Then, things suddenly get even worse. Because the police officer coming to deal with him is none other than the guy he hooked up with and then later stormed out on. The guy TK had started having such strong and unexpected feelings for that he had given in to the urge to flee. The guy who TK assumes probably already thinks terrible things about him because of the way things went down the last time they were together. So now not only is this an undesirable legal situation, but it's also an awkward and embarrassing social situation. And now this guy knows that "TK" stands for Tyler Kennedy. Ugh.

From Carlos' perspective, he met this guy who was smokin' hot who he felt an instant connection with...this guy who made him feel for the first time like maybe he wasn't actually broken and then gave him the best orgasm of his life. Said guy then stormed out on him for what appeared to Carlos to be no good reason. He couldn't even be bothered to sit and have a meal and a little conversation. And now? This guy is out getting in bar fights completely sober, putting himself in a dangerous situation where he could very well get himself killed. This guy who Carlos already cares about, and who has seemingly completely rejected him at the first sign of Carlos wanting to get to know him. Carlos is hurt but he's also angry. Most of all, Carlos is angry about the fact that TK is being so completely reckless with his own safety.

The guys from the bar fight don't want to press charges, so Carlos tells TK that he's free to go. But he can't stop from giving TK a little advice. He's not trying to be his boyfriend (lie) or even his friend if he's not into it (oh, Carlos) but he tells TK that he "should talk to someone about why you felt compelled to do something so suicidal." Carlos says this without knowing that TK was suicidal and acted on it not long ago.

TK appears to be affected by this but says nothing. It appears that maybe the fight has gone out of him...until Carlos lets him know that he has something on his face, giving him a box of tissues to take care of it. TK gets visibly frustrated when Carlos tells him he's trying to clean off the wrong side. But then Carlos does something that TK doesn't expect.

He says, "Stop, just...let me." And with a shaky hand, he uses a tissue to dab at the spot on TK's face.

This clearly isn't nothing to Carlos. The emotion in his eyes is undeniable. He cares. That simple act of caring is enough to break TK's walls down the tiniest bit. To allow him to show some vulnerability. TK wants to explain.

He apologizes for what happened between them and tells him that he just went through a really bad breakup, "like nuclear bad," and then he relapsed. Not, as Carlos assumes, with him, but with substances. TK is giving Carlos a piece of himself, trusting him in a way he has not trusted anyone else he's met in Texas, as much as he likes them and enjoys working with them.

Carlos recognizes the significance of this moment of vulnerability. But it's more than that. It gives him context for what happened. TK wasn't just being a jerk and storming out because he didn't care to get to know Carlos. He has serious things going on. And...the champagne! TK has issues with substances and Carlos had offered him champagne without even asking first!

Carlos, always quick to blame himself, apologizes, and in that moment, his walls come down a little too. He had been trying to play it stoic and tough and like he didn't care so, so much. (Of course he already gave himself away when he started gently wiping TK's face)

But TK doesn't stop there. He gives Carlos more of himself, explaining that, ever since he's gotten to Austin, it's just grey. And he feels numb all the time. To explain why he started the bar fight, TK says, "I guess I just--I wanted to feel something."

Carlos looks at him. The anger is gone. He has understanding in his eyes...and that look of caring is still there, too. He watches TK gather his things and stand up. Carlos could have said anything in this moment. He chooses to tease TK a little. TK said he started a fight because he just wanted to feel something, so Carlos tells him, "Judging by that lip, I'd say mission accomplished."

TK looks at him with annoyance. He kind of can't believe that THIS is Carlos' reaction to his vulnerability!

"You really busting my balls right now?"

But Carlos stands his ground as the corner of his mouth goes up slightly.

"Yeah, I suppose I am."

Carlos made the right choice here because TK smiles too.

They like each other so much.

I fully believe that everything that happens after wouldn't have happened without this scene. It's pivotal in their relationship. The journey they go through is incredible! From this:

To this:

Iconic and unmatched.

[alrightbuckaroo]

In a never-ending effort to cross-post my this is what falling in love feels like series, I wanted to share the one that started off. Enjoy some topical pre-established Tarlos <3

TK wakes up and is overwhelmed by the smell of coffee. He drowns in the scent and eases himself up. He doesn’t recognize the bedroom but then he remembers he spent the night at Carlos’.

Carlos Reyes, a cop who works for the Austin Police Department who TK had tried to not give a second thought too.

Well, he’s tried and he did not succeed.

After one too many chance encounters at one of the many local coffee shops, TK decided that it must be more than a coincidence. He decided to do what he does best and act on infatuation and not intellect.

Now he’s stuck doing what else he does best, running away before it goes wrong in every way imaginable.

He grabs his clothes from the ground and pulls his jeans up, and slips his shirt on. He leaves Carlos’s bedroom and walks out to see Carlos moving another pancake to a stack sitting on a plate on the counter.

“And he rises,” Carlos moves to open the fridge. He’s wearing striped pajama bottoms, a white tank, a black rimmed pair of glasses, and an award winning smile. When he looks like this, TK’s tempted to act on his infatuation once again. “Welcome back to the land of the living, tiger. Hope you’re hungry.”

He closes the fridge and places a bottle of creamer on the counter. “Breakfast is just about done. I was about to pour myself a cup of coffee, you want one?”

“Uh, sure?” TK is starting to button up his shirt when he stops, “Breakfast?”

“Well yeah, you don’t have to be in for another,” Carlos checks the time above the stove. “For another hour or so, figured you wouldn’t want to show up to work hungry.”

“Oh,” TK says, “I mean, I had just planned to pick something up on my drive.”

Carlos shrugs, “Well, now you don’t have to.” He opens a cupboard and grabs two mugs. “Two sugars, right?”

“Huh?”

“You take two sugars in your coffee, right?” Carlos asks, reaching the sugar packets next to the pot.

“Oh, uh, yeah,” TK answers. He decides to sit down, and realizes this is happening.

He watches Carlos as he grabs a spoon from a drawer and mixes his coffee for him. He places the mug in front of TK, “It’s not Deja Brew’s signature blend, but I think it does the job.”

He turns back to the stove and TK watches him.

Alex would occasionally offer him a microwavable breakfast sandwich, Jason barely offered to let him stay the night and he doesn’t recall ever actually stepping foot in Dominic’s apartment despite dating for seven months.

He doesn’t think any one of them would even know his coffee order.

TK takes a sip; the coffee blooming into a warmth that he’ll deny was already there. He looks into the mug, watching as two bubbles as they join together and become one. “Thanks.”

Carlos shrugs as he begins to pour his own cup. “I’m not myself before my coffee, so I always plan to make a pot in the morning.” He turns and smirks, “Is nice to share it with someone though.”

“No,” TK looks up, a ghost of a smile on his face. “Thanks for remembering.”

[happilylovingchaos]

Sorry again about my past rant, @lonestar-s5countdown… this is early but I had a lot to look for on AO3.

And oh boy. This is my only reaction to how deep the grief/ mourning tag is:

Judd:

3 am by Annide: Judd and TK spend a sleepless moment bonding over the things that keep them up at night, with the former thinking on the old 126 members.

Grace and Judd One-shots by ExpectSpellingErrors: Exactly what it says in the title. Go one at a time, though— there’s 751+ stories as of Aug. 3 this year!

Sometimes by Multifandom_damnation: Judd and TK aren’t that different in their respective trauma-scarred self-esteems. They just need to clear up their clouding pride and pain to understand that.

Nothing lasts forever by lydiamxrtin: Judd takes TK horse-riding, vís-a-vis 1x02.

Southern comfort by Araloth: Judd shows the new 126 what barbacoa is, resulting in a Southern dinner.

Hands over pulse points by isnt_that_wizard: An AU where Judd and Grace allow Tarlos to stay with them after they lose the townhouse.

Grace:

Of grief and grace by @AliceSchuyler: Grace loses her father earlier in this story, before he gets to meet her baby.

Ladder 126, please respond by trashpup: Explores further the devastation that followed Grace on the other side of the fertilizer factory.

911 Dispatcher’s week by SneetchesToo: Grace showing in canon and fanon why she’s the steady voice on the other end we know and love. Some comedic shenanigans ensue.

Wake me up by @AliceSchuyler: An Avicii songfic that follows Grace’s perspective and flashing moments of meeting Judd during the car accident on the bridge.

I could hold on forever by DoubleL27: It’s Judd’s turn to be there for Grace when she starts having bad dreams of her own.

Like a wrecking ball by machtaholic: Taking place sometime during 1x09, Grace visits TK to give him a self-care day.

This love we carry by fiddlersgreen: After he learns his lesson in 3x13, Carlos and Grace discuss their shared experiences of seeing their life partners in the worst pain possible: that of unimaginable loss.

Deep Dive for Grief: Will be split into different sections depending on the canon-compliant/ AU types.

Canon Codas:

Grand gestures by @lonestarbabe and Pigeonsplotinsecrecy: TK processes his breakup with Alex badly, leading into the drug overdose we see in the pilot.

@heytheredeann wrote 4 works, and all took place in Texas, all in Judd and Grace’s POV, all after the fertilizer factory explosion. I kinda can’t believe it isn’t already a series.

Those were the days by benjaminrussell: Judd has a bittersweet dream. Takes place before the Strands arrive in Austin.

In a world like this (I’ve got you) by @lire-casander: A 5+1 coda that sums up his POV of the events of season 1, and early season 2.

Teach me what I need to know (to be strong enough to let go) by hollyhobbit101: After 2x13, Tommy continues to mourn for Charles, but she’s got Grace to help her through.

No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear by lydiamxrtin: So far unfinished, but it explores how deep TK’s grief for Gwyn goes and how profoundly it changes everything in his life— not just how it’s broken, but how it can be put back together. Even if there’s a mother-sized hole left.

Let me by @heartstringsduet: A realistically sweet look at how TK and Carlos’ intimacy weathers the loss of Gwyn.

Both your smiles were twice as wide as ours by daisieflowers: A low-key one-shot of Alex’s reminiscence, some hints of grief, and remaining ambivalence toward his ex-boyfriend. It’s a little melancholic, but there’s catharsis in learning how one’s faring from the end before moving forward.

Tales of love and loss by micaurel: The 126 celebrates Dio de Los Muertos to grieve, commemorate and celebrate the lives of people they’ve known and loved.

Lou 2: Lou-o-ween! by @dragonbinx: As a Halloween get-together featuring Tommy’s girls and an escaped Lou 2 goes a bit awry (like it does), Tommy and Carlos reminisce on their own celebrations with the two people they loved.

Light the shadows on your face by @lire-casander: Not quite grief-focused, but it does feature Michelle saying goodbye (for now).

Tribute by ThirteenRedVampireBites: A 1x10 coda that follows up on the International Space Station loss. I think the fandom probably doesn’t know how badly needed this resolution was, especially for Grace and the astronauts’ families.

Grieving for Owen AU:

The last goodbye by buckdiaz: TK goes into hard denial when he learns why Owen hasn’t reported into work.

Long way to get by meditatinghoneybadger: Owen’s sudden death on the job causes TK to relapse in his grief. The rest explores how he and Carlos try to get through both his rehabilitation and the process of forgiving each other.

Taken by @whumpkeys: Another version of 1x04 when Owen doesn’t make it out of the crumbling house.

Grieving for TK AU:

Quédate by hollyhobbit101: A truly bad-future for Tarlos. I cried at this just as much as I did for Gwyn’s canonical death.

I got a feeling that it’s time to let go by @marjansmarwani: TK gets really close to death (like he kinda does), and the last one is still sad (spoiler alert) but there’s a different reason now for Owen to grieve.

Shut your eyes and fall apart by @marjansmarwani: TK dies for real, and the 126 comes together to grieve together.

Grieving for Tim Codas:

Who cares if one more light goes out in a sky of a million stars (it flickers, flickers) by gapsinthedays: Nancy copes with Tim’s death, horribly.

Reaching, there is nothing left by tiniestmite: A harrowing POV of Tim experiencing his own death.

Grief is a lantern by Pigeonsplotinsecrecy: A follow-up to the mourning montage in 2x02.

Not one or the other by @maxbegone: While honoring a friendship tradition, Nancy processes the traumatic events from the previous months in season 3. There’s a mention of TK’s NDE but it is also half-Tim-centric since he’s the first work friend (as far as canon is concerned) that Nancy had.

Every second chance (that changed its mind on me) by @lire-casander: It’s a nightmare, and the pain from it will still make itself known sometimes. But throughout this interpretation of how Nancy moves forward in season 2, it’s possible to wake up.

[unsaidace]

I agree somewhat with the first bit about what you said about the Lou interview, but the second bit I have to disagree with. As a masculine queer man (and as others have also said), we don't really get too much representation, a lot of gay representation is very stereotypical. Don't get me wrong, nothing is wrong with a gay guy being feminine or "stereotypical" because we're real people and real people vary in personality and interests, but when the only gay characters you see on TV are feminine (or in relationships one is feminine and one is masculine, because for some reason they always have to model gay relationships after straight ones), it can really get to you. It makes us feel "not gay enough" or hurts us to hear many men mocking gay guys because they assume we must be feminine (which again, they shouldn't be mocking feminine dudes either). Anyways as a queer dude I was super happy that there were finally a couple of queer men on TV in a relationship and they both happened to be masculine because I got to see myself represented for once. I would love to see more representation including fem4fem/masc4masc relationships and characters that are more fluid in their presentation. I don't think him simply repeating back what praises he's heard from queer fans is suggestive that he himself stereotypes gay men. And as for the first point, whilst I disagree with him a bit on that front, I'd like to give him the benefit of the doubt in that that might be his personal experience with queer media.

Anon, first of all, I want to thank you for being respectful about disagreeing with me. Though, having read this ask, I think we’re actually on the same page — my wording in the post you’re responding to just wasn’t as clear as it should’ve been.

I agree that masculine queer men are extremely under-represented in media, and that was what I meant with the “subverting stereotypes” comment. Queer representation in media is still very formulaic, follows a certain set of stereotypes. And for some people, they relate to those characters. Others don’t. Masc queer men don’t see themselves reflected on TV very often. I was talking to a friend of mine about this, and he said that the Bucktommy relationship was a breath of fresh air for masc queer men, that they were finally seeing themselves represented in a way that felt authentic and real.

Clearly, while talking about LFJ’s poorly worded comments, I worded my own comments quite poorly, too. Let me clarify. What I meant by that post was that, while it was poorly worded, I believe that LFJ was actually praising the show for portraying a masc4masc queer relationship — rather than following the same formula of, for example, Klaine in Glee, or Mitch and Cam in Modern Family, or even Tarlos in 9-1-1: Lone Star. I apologise that the post didn’t come across that way, and I apologise for any offense that I may have caused. That was never my intention, and I’m truly sorry if my post upset or offended you in any way.

[epiphainie]

I’m sure uve seen the news that lone star is ending after season five and grace isn’t coming back for the last season. The cancellation news brought up a discussion that I think was quite interesting and wanted to know ur thoughts 👀

Someone mentioned that Tim must’ve known or had an idea that season five would be lone stars last and with that, the 911 franchise (even tho they’re on diff networks, they’re still under Disney) would lose their only remaining mlm couple, tarlos, (pre bucktommy going canon) after they already lost Mavid from the original series.

And that brought tim to the og and deciding, along with TPTB, to explore a queer storyline with one of the two characters, buck or eddie. Eddie didn’t work out for whatever creative reasons so they went with buck. (( Basically, bi buck was never about buddie [as we’ve know lol], queer eddie being suggested was never about a future queer eddie storyline, and tim doesn’t plan on exploring a queer storyline with both characters, just one and that happened to be buck in the end))

We have all of this, coupled with the mention from oliver of hoping bucktommy could be like tarlos, and just the general care he’s put into bringing back a LI that ticks off all these boxes (is his own character, has the potential to have relationships outside of his relationship with buck, etc), so I can’t help but think that bucktommy was planned from the beginning to be a long term relationship.

Of course they left room to see audience reaction to the couple and the general storyline, but they still took the care to write a story that could extend beyond what we’ve seen in the past with either buck or eddie’s love interests so that if the reception was indeed a good one, they could move forward with the same relationship.

And now that they can see that the response has been largely positive, they’re moving full steam ahead *hopefully* to tell a great love story and tommy’s inclusion in the last two episodes definitely shows that.

Hey anon,

Hm yeah, all of this sounds very plausible to me. I think with Tarlos soon gone, having a male queer character in the og show became more of a real plan than just a passing idea and they decided on Buck as the most tenable choice. We know Tim said during the conception of the cruise arc - with not being able to get Lucy's actress back - he thought of Lou/Tommy. I think the thought process was "okay now we have a pilot - oh wait this could work for the bi Buck storyline we're planning as well" because one of the things he said was how he didn't want to just have a new random gay character to couple up with Buck. He specifically mentioned how it was hard to bring the previous LIs into the rest of the show organically and how it was even hard with Abby in the first season and that's why he wrote Maddie as Buck's sister. They wanted this LI to have a standing chance. That gives me the impression that they were at least hoping BuckTommy would get a positive response and they could treat the relationship as a long-term possibility. The initial four-eps were a test ride, not a he will only be here for four episodes. I think by the time they were writing/shooting 7x06, they were already committed to extending this to at least s8.

[shit-talker]

I'm gonna go through the "confirmed storylines" from the lone start wiki because I have thoughts;

1. Owen's brother - literally don't care, they added the character that they could have fleshed out way more before they killed him off, the only slightly intreasting thing that could come out of this is if Tyler (Owen's dead brother) becomes something of a plot point - does TK know about Tyler? Does he know where his name comes from? Is TK nicknamed TK because Owne found it hard to call him Tyler?

2. It's giving the main 911 show, which I love. Btw, I'm telling you, the 126 member who "might get injured" is either going to be Tommy, or TK. I'm willing to bet my life. I'm leaning more towards Tommy but this show has a habit of putting TK in damger soooo

3. That's an interesting one. I know that it's gonna be between Paul and Marjan, but honestly, Paul should get it. He's more experienced, and Marjan is known for making reckless decisions. Though, I think it'd be funny if Mateo is somehow pulled into the chaos because of his stint as lieutenant.

4. Yeah, is this is just referring to Wyatt becoming a dispatcher? Unless they introduce a whole new character? See below.

5. I take this as a clue that Tommy is going to be out of commission for a bit, which makes me think she'll be the one hurt with the train stuff. It will be cool, especially because TK is her partner and has historically challenged Nancy in the past. I want them to be the bestest of friends, give me more of their friendship. Also, if Tommy is not there for a bit, and Nancy takes over as captain, that means they'll probably need a new paramedic, which could be the new member of the 126 that we'll apparently love? I mean, I feel like it needs to be someone we already know because introducing a brand new character seems risky, especially if Tommy is going to come back as captain and they'll have to get rid of said character. The only character I can think of is Pearce, though. Which, considering his character in S3 could be a possibility.

6. I'm hoping to God this has something to do with Nancy. I know that Tim wasn't killed by an asteroid, but if we could touch back on the impact it had on Nancy, especially if she's a captain in charge now. Maybe TK or the new paramedic (?) gets injured or close to being injuried in this and she freaks out. I want a bonding moment between Tommy and Nancy. I want the med team to be a little family.

7. I have a lot of feelings on this, but for the most part, I love it. It was sort of obvious that was the direction they wanted to go after Wyatt got hurt, and I love it. I love the dispatchers in the 911 universe, and having the first main dispatcher be a guy for the first time is fun. I do wonder how they'll deal with Grace no longer being in the show, especially because her character won't be in it at all. Also, it'll be a fun dynamic when Judd returns to the 126 (which he will, unless Judd's character is also leaving this season, which I doubt (please don't take him away from me))

Also, gotta talk about tarlos because I have THOUGHTS.

The person from TK's past will be interesting, I know a lot of people think it'll be Alex, but at the same time, what would the point be? Why would he? I don't think it'll be Alex. I also saw a lot of people saying it'll be Enzo and Jonah, which I can see but "from his past" kind of inplies it's someone he hasn't talked to or thought about for a while, and we know he keeps in contact with his brother and Enzo. Though, It would be really REALLY fun to actually meet Enzo (come on, it's time to meet him, he's been mentioned so many times). I'm really hoping it's either an old friend from his addict days or someone he used to work with in New York.

Also, Carlos solving his father's murder will be fun. I'm hoping we get to see more of the Reyes family. I want the Reyes sisters, and I want them now. TK will also totally be freaking out, and I'm hoping for a bonding moment between him and a member of the 126 that ISN'T Owen. I want either Tommy or Judd, saying they've both been married and also can you imagine TK going to them for relationship advice? Adorable.

[carlos-in-glasses]

Wonderful wonderful cig.

Not too long ago I rewatched ‘Unlikely Event of An Emergency’ and like always I sobbed, no matter how many times I watched it.

But the feeling multiplied tenfolds because I was somewhat taken a back to your work ‘Where All This Loves Comes From”.More specifically the scene where Owen tells TK that being loved is the first thing he ever experienced on Earth. And also the one in 2020 where TK and Gwyn was on Spring Street before he was about to propose to Alex, and Gwyn reminded TK of how both of them love him.

I think it’s lovely how work can fandom can enhance and just unconsciously be adapted to the canon-show. Because now every time I think about the Strand family, my mind goes back to the work you have beautifully created. There’s so many works from canon compliant to canon divergence to AUs, that has been cemented in my mind and heart, even when the show or the pairing has ended, and that’s the beauty of fandom.

So I just want to say thank you, to you and so many amazing member of the fandom for being the heart to the journey of enjoying the show. Whether you are a creator or an enjoyer, on the sideline cheering on our lovely creators giving them loves and positive feedbacks.

The wonderful people who has been majorly open and accepting, the works created, the meta, the silly discussion has been majority part of why I enjoyed LS so much so I won’t be worried when the show end. So, I hope the show ending wouldn’t discourage a lot of people in joining and/or creating, because the main part of fandom has always been the community, the genuine love and excitement from fan.

p.s.

I can’t wait to read the Poet Fic and unravel what you had in store for us. A 117k work 😱 you spoil us

😭 Oh wonderful wonderful anon! I don’t even know what to say. This is such an amazing message. That you remember anything about my fics after reading them completely knocks me off my feet. I get it, because so many fics live in my head rent free, but it just feels amazing to be told this about my own too, in particular during a tough week where I’ve been feeling quite worried about lots of things. And that Unlikely Event of an Emergency sparked you to think of it!! I’m hugely flattered, thank you!

Anyway - I completely agree with you about the works in his fandom. My love for LS and Tarlos goes beyond the show and belongs within the versions of the characters that are created by the writers here, some of whom I’ve been lucky enough to befriend, and others who I don’t really know but think are immensely cool and talented. I did have a bit of a hard time with the opening arc of season 4 (and the ending! Gosh) but the fics, gif sets, art, meta posts, made all the difference. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, but when the show ends, the characters do not. They will be available to rewatch anyway, in hours and hours worth of episodes (which is more than some fandoms get) AND they become ours. Like a special gift. The fandom will change a bit after season 5 (in a way I hope includes new fans arriving!) but I will be here, I will be writing and reading, and I’m really happy to know lovely people like you will be too. I feel your positivity right in my heart, and I hope lots of other creators and enjoyers of the fandom see it too - because this is such a gorgeous love note to them, not just me 🥰 So I’m adding the 911 Lone Star and Tarlos tags to this.

And thank you for wanting to read Poet Fic! I’m so excited about it and feedback has been amazing, so I hope you like it if you do get to it! 🌈

How your message finds me:

[silversky9]

I dont see why the couldn't have gone another route for Buck and Tommy. They could have made a whole other hurdle that was more compelling and held a lot more depth and showed perseverance in love. Maybe it could have been addressed that basically Tommy was crying out for help like and tie in 8x05.

Multiple times he's suggested a sense of craving a found family like the 118 and needed to know he had people in his corner

They could have idk had Buck find out that even tho yes Tommy is shown drinking, maybe he's had a substance abuse issue . Maybe the way his father treated him and hiding himself impacted him more than he let on. Maybe again show he's vulnerable more than his put together outside shows. Maybe he's not maintaining his control cus he has fears, insecurities, etc. Doesn't have to be exactly like the tarlos storyline. They could have found ways to make it his own sl.

It would have brought in Bobby forming a deep connection. And showing that he has Buck and the others and give help fill that whole.

Their were so many ways to go besides the cop out they gave us which made no sense whatsever

[tellmegoodbye]

-> Music Monday

It's Monday, so you know what that means...more songs!!

I made this post the other day going over the details of how this tag works, as well as linking the playlists and docs! Don't worry if a song you wanted to submit is already there, because adding your own thoughts and interpretations is a completely valid way to contribute!

Today, I have four soundtrack songs, as well as one Tarlos song and one Jace song.

How Did You Love - Shinedown

This song is very important to me, being one of my favorite songs by one of my favorite bands. Lone Star and OG both have incredible music taste, what can I say? It's a very Owen coded song to me.

"What is the legacy that you're going to leave behind? It's a song that is a lot about reflection and understanding that it's better to give love than to spread hate." - Shinedown

In the video that I linked above the band explains that the meaning of this song is about accepting that one day, your time will be up, and that it's important to focus on what we leave behind when we're gone. That is Owen to me. He is someone who is learning to accept his mortality and put all of his efforts into being a good father, and a good captain. In 1x02, the episode this song is from, he is still coming to terms with his cancer and what that is going to mean for him going forward. He has to learn to accept the things he can't control, and focus on the things that matter most.

"No one gets out alive. Every day is do or die. The one thing you leave behind is how did you love? How did you love?"

Simple Man - Lynyrd Skynyrd

Another god tier song from 1x02. This song reminds me a lot of Owen, Gwyn and TK. It's an anthem for the way they love him. The lyrics “don't forget son, there is someone up above” make me think of how Gwyn is watching over him even after she's gone.

Also, Shinedown did a cover of this song that blows the original out of the water. Just so you know.

Breathe - Fleurie

The lyrics “when will we finally breathe” are on my blog title for a reason. This song reminds me of Push, and One Day (the episode the song is from) which is my second favorite episode in the whole show!

There's a feeling I get when listening to this song that is similar to the way I feel when I watch these episodes, like something is building up until suddenly all of the emotion comes pouring out and there's nothing you can do to stop it.

Amen - Amber Run

Such a good song for 3x08! It's the perfect song for TK and Gwyn and the lyrics definitely speak to his struggles with addiction, as well as the way he's feeling after she dies.

"Oh, is there a heaven? You'd know now you've been"

"Are those real stars that hang in the sky? Or are they man-made, a trick of the light?"

"Cause the devil is raging inside my mind And is there a moment when it all makes sense? When saying goodbye doesn't feel like the end?"

"Sometimes I'd rather be dead, at least then I'm with you, amen"

Now that I've gotten the soundtrack songs out of the way, I'm going to share my other two songs!

If It Keeps You Up At Night - The Swoons

I've seen the world on top of your shoulders You lift me up 'cause you know I'm smaller When this life's a concert I can't see When I'm black and blue you paint me brighter And raise me up just like a lighter Even through the darkest symphony

And if it keeps you up at night I'll stay up and learn the words to all the songs that you like So if your eyes are open wide I can sing you something sweeter than that devil in your mind And if it still keeps you up at night I won't hold it against you I'll just hold, hold you tight

This song is perfect for Tarlos. It's about them loving each other even through the hard times. The lyrics in the chorus specifically are what I think they are feeling when they watch each other struggle with grief, addiction, and everything else. The first scene it reminds me of is the dining table scene in 3x13, but it could apply to many other scenes too.

Are You Still Waiting For Me? - Vian Izak

Traveling this road alone Made my heart heavy like a stone But when I think of you, I feel hope Are you still waiting for me, love?

I fall so many times, oh no But standing up makes me strong I need you in my life, you're the one Are you still waiting for me, love?

This is the song that reminds me of early Jace. When Judd finally sees Grace again when Tommy is in labor and he's uncertain of whether or not she still wants to be with him. He's wondering if she's still waiting for him.

No pressure tagging: @strandnreyes @nancys-braids @carlos-in-glasses @goodways @lemonlyman-dotcom

@carlos-tk @literateowl @eclectic-sassycoweyes @herefortarlos @thisbuildinghasfeelings

@freneticfloetry @bonheur-cafe @captain-gillian @heartstringsduet @welcometololaland

[paperstorm]

A more interesting approach would be that it’s Carlos that changes his mind about children from spending time with Jonah, a decision he makes on his own.

I never wanted children until I met my current partner and his child. This little girl opened my heart like no one else has, yes even my bf. I now am actively trying for a baby.

Not having children is perfectly fine and Tarlos not having children would be an interesting refreshing storyline but I feel like it’s not going in that direction

I would like this story line as it’s not Carlos being forced or learning to accept. People can change their minds and feelings all the time. I’d like Carlos to do that on his own terms. TK is busy with the Enzo vs Owen drama and meanwhile Carlos is falling in love with Jonah and opening his heart to possibilities. Fathers is such a theme in this show. Carlos and TK will have learned how to be present, engaging and loving with their child from the lessons their learnt from their fathers.

The show ending with Carlos telling TK he wants children is a beautiful open ended story for a spin off. Killing off Enzo like you said is just bad writing, they can not loose 3 parents between them at this young age. It’s too much

Yeah it could be really good if something like this is what happens! Carlos finding some kind of closure with his father's murder and being able to begin to reconcile all that trauma that still exists in him, all that fear that he won't be a good father himself and the tragedy of having just started to grow close to his dad only to lose him. Life doesn't play fair, it doesn't give us things only when we are exactly perfectly ready for them. Sometimes you have to roll with things you are definitely not ready for, and you learn so much about yourself.

[sageandred]

Carlos (+Tarlos) S5 Storylines

Since we've seen those Carlos s5 tidbits from Rafael, feeling inspired for a Carlos-centric Lone Star wishlist

- Carlos + TK detective team (heavy emphasis on Carlos' detective skills); really just TK along for the ride, but them being an unsecretive unit

(also expecting some secrecy of Carlos hiding for a bit; I'm realistic..it's a Fox drama)

- Carlos dealing with his complicated relationship with his dad/why he doesn't want kids (I'm all for the basic human right to not have kids and don't need a reason, but it seems like Carlos doesn't fit that category/has qualms because of his own upbringing)

- Speaking of which - TK and Carlos baby-sitting together with TK freaking out he is bad at it (he's just overthinking), and it coming naturally to Carlos (we've seen him with Tommy's kids; it's no surprise)

- It's about time for Carlos to be seriously hurt/in waiting solely for the TK concern and turmoil that we've seen from Carlos so many times before.

- Lou II better show up like they actually have a pet/more than we'd seen of Owen's dog for that earlier period before he graced us with his presence once again

- TK speaking Spanish (badly + well)

- Carlos + Nancy; TK + Nancy

- newlywed honeymoon period Tarlos

- more Carlos family background/sisters (talk about the things he doesn't remember more/callback to what they started at the funeral reception)

- the nicknames Ronen talked about (I'm excited; give me new ones; give me ol' faithful "baby" - it's always been a cute part of their scenes)

- Owen casually calling Carlos son/Andrea casually (or not so casually) calling TK son

- Andrea + TK heart-to-heart where they worry about Carlos/talk about her husband

[sugdenlovesdingle]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers! Spread the self-love 💞

Ok this is super hard because I feel like I always mention the same fics for this kind of thing so I'm going to try limit myself to the past year.

Date night (buck/tommy) Bobby and Athena spot Buck and Tommy out on a date together. A little outsider POV-ish that I wrote in an hour and my first time really writing bucktommy AND bathena. I just really want Buck's pseudo parents to "officially" give Tommy their stamp of approval. I know we've already had the scene of Bobby approving, but I want Athena too - though judging by Angela smiling in that zoom interview when Oliver was talking about Buck's relationship with Tommy, we might just get it.

Buck's bisexual speedrun (buck/tommy) taking it slow? we don't know her. Buck and Tommy both going from 0 to 60 in their relationship in .02 seconds. The bucktommy brainrot is real, people. This was based on a post (or ask i don't remember) I saw in the tag where someone said the way things were going with them, Buck would probably show up to work one day soon and be like "Oh yeah Tommy and I got married in Vegas, my name is Kinard now. How was your weekend?"

Love online (tarlos) Luisa takes matters into her own hands to fix Carlos' love life. I just really liked the idea of interfering sisters - and the last line that I basically wrote the rest of the fic around.

Undercover (tarlos) A season 4 what if...? Where Carlos' big secret is him going undercover instead of his marriage to Iris. Inspired by this gifset of Rafa in some other show (I think) playing a barman. (I wanted to link it but the link on my AO3 is dead - the OP might have deleted it or something) This is a little older but I got a comment on this a few days ago asking for more. I'd kind of abandoned it/forgotten about it but it made me dig up the file on my computer and found a half finished next chapter, so I'm going to try (not making any promises) to update it in the not too distant future.

View from the taco truck (tarlos) My season 5 countdown exchange fic - TK and Carlos' relationship through the eyes of their favourite food truck vendor. The idea has been knocking around my head for ages and I finally (eventually) decided to write it... but I'm honestly not sure about it. it "sounded" better in my head (as usual). But thank you to everyone that's read it and liked it and left kudos or a comment!!

Thanks for including me ❤ I'm a little late to the party so I think all of my fic writing mutuals have done this by now. If you haven't and want to - consider this your 'tag'!