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Carmy told Sydney that maintaining 3 Michelin stars at a top restaurant was a source of stress for him and that he felt a sense of dread when he did achieve that.

Carmy felt more relaxed---as relaxed as Carmy could ever be---once he stopped having to work at that posh restaurant in New York and no longer needed to do tedious work to maintain an almost impossible standard.

So we all agree the guy Luca was talking about was Carmy, right???

Carmy said every time a new guy would appear on the kitchen, he would "cook this mf" and show how much better he was than the new guy

Luca said that one time we started working in this restaurant, he started having this battle with this other guy who ended up being so much better than him. Which made him feel like a weight was lifted out of his shoulders cause that way, he didn't have to worry about being the best all the time

So my question is: Do you think Carmy relaxed after "winning the fight"??? Cause Luca said he felt relieved for not having to be the best, so did Carmy feel relaxed for being the best, or did he continue to cook like he was in a competition???

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FINALLY!! Someone else that sees the toxicity of Carlos' constant lying and him trying to downplay the severity of those lies!

Who would want to get married to a man with a secret wife, lied about wanting kids, routinely lies about investigating serial killers on his own causing people to spend days looking for him,, and treats every one of his misdeeds as a large joke? Not anyone with a gram of dignity and self-esteem. TK should've MADE CARLOS ADDRESS HIS PROBLEMS OF DISHONESTY.

Unpopular opinion regarding LS finale:

Tarlos should not have gotten married. This is coming from me, a fan of Tarlos since the show began airing. A fan of Ronen and Rafael. I adore Rafael as a person, for all the things he stands for. But the writing let them down in a big way.

So much went down between them in eight weeks!

I will forever be a Tarlos fan but this season felt so cheap for them.

1. Carlos revealing his marriage to Iris only because the venue had a sudden availability. Andrea who didn't ask him about his life for a decade, knew he was married but TK, the man he was living with, his lover, his fiance, did not.

2. The repeated jokes about Iris being his wife. What the hell was that? Would you keep bringing up your ex to throw in your current's face as a joke? You would if you had the emotional range of a teaspoon. The writing baffled me there.

3. Carlos' go to move this season when upset with or conflicted with TK was to go silent on him. Maybe it's me, I work to have an extremely healthy and communicative relationship with my SO, so this just confuses me. Our go to move on a rough day, be it due to the world or each other, is a quick 'Babe, I'm having a day. I need a few hours. Ttyl.' A simple I need a moment vs the silent treatment.

Carlos gave TK the silent treatment over Iris and again in the finale. How does that even work? I'm miffed you're not taking my side when I'm spiraling so I'll ignore you and go rogue.

4. The constant freakin retconning of the Reyes parents. S2 we find out they hadn't spoken about his love life to him since he came out to them. Gabriel will communicate more with Owen than tell Carlos anything that matters. Yet all Carlos wants is for Gabriel to like TK. S3 we had Andrea ready to give TK a talking to for hurting her baby boy. Ma'am, respectfully, it doesn't work like that. You hurt him for a decade. And no, you don't get a say in your son's intimate relationship. Any relationship! He has to be the one to tell TK that he was hurt by TK's behaviour. He's 29ish, not 6.

S4 gives us Andrea insisting that Gabriel is a good man and father to Carlos. Carlos' comment about the rangers was... Bro, you work for the APD. But I'm not touching that. The fact is that Carlos' reality is that he felt disconnected from his father and doesn't have meaningful moments with him. Insisting Gabriel is good doesn't fix that. And then the end. Beginning a new chapter in your life's story after that major upheaval of not only losing a parent but nearly killing a man? So Carlos is magically fixed cause daddy Owen took him home and got him a drink?

5. Iris once again featuring prominently in Carlos' life. I'd jokingly said when Iris was introduced this season that she would be Carlos' best person and the joke had continued that they'd also bring Michelle back so joint best persons.

Let's keep aside that your ex wife, be it a platonic whatever relationship or not, featuring in your next wedding is just weird. It's not like they've been solid friends for years. It's not like Carlos married her and then realized he was gay. None of it. And if they wanted to shove Iris the bestie down our throats, shouldn't she have been at the funeral? Somewhere along the way? A simple, 'Carlos, you're spiralling. I know what that's like. I think you need to talk to a professional. This is not you.' But nada. Come be best person and joke about not having the ring on you.

6. This show gets hailed for being LGBTQ+ friendly. I'm not seeing it. See Station 19 where all the characters, gay and straight are kissing and making out. Here we only get the het couples. We only get Owen Strand going at it with a different woman each season. No intimacy even for Judd and Grace, the longest canon couple on this show.

Please explain to me how it's a good thing that we had our canon gay couple find out that one of them had been lying for four whole years about a secret marriage with zero consequences?

Please explain to me how if Carlos is around 30, which would make him 18 in 2011 [it's nearly 4am forgive any mathing errors] was this a normal thing of let me a newly out to my parents gay man go marry my female best friend for comfort? And for TK to move past it, Carlos to keep joking about it, Iris to joke she will come judge if TK is fit for Carlos.... it's all so toxic to me.

7. Finally, Iris slapped Carlos across his face. Unprovoked. Don't excuse it as her meds. Don't excuse it as her condition. Because if the genders were reversed this fandom would be up in arms rather than giggling and making Iris Carlos and TK's bestie.

Carlos allowed a person to hit him across his face. And carried on like nothing changed. He just fell into happily telling Iris all about TK. So the show didn't want to give Carlos any connections out of the 126 other than two toxic Blake women. Its made me wonder ever since how often Iris hit him for this to be his conditioned response.

I'm allowed to be disappointed that the show fucked this up. I got married last year. I had three amazing ceremonies - one that was exactly what we wanted, one that was for my faith and one that was for our families. Marriage to me has been special and beautiful.

We didn't even get Tarlos cutting their cake or last season kissing to celebrate their engagement. Instead we ended the season, the hyped Tarlos wedding episode with Owen and his brother. I'm not even touching assisted suicide laws in Texas.

I'm allowed to be disappointed. I'm tagging appropriately. You can choose not to send me hate for my opinions. But it's whatever at this point. I have zero safe space in the 9-1-1 fandom and only two friends to discuss the show with. I'm making my peace with that.

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callie adams foster + character profile [insp]

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Tbh, it isn't TK's job to analyze all of Carlos' body language when he is severely heartbroken over the death of his mother and relapsing.

It is Carlos' job to be honest about his feelings with his Significant Other.

Carlos may have had a connection with Gwyn, but Carlos even said when he was kidnapped, "No son loved their mother like TK loved Gwyn." A connection with an in-law you've known for a year or two as an adult isn't comparable to the connection of being loved and cherished your whole life by a mother.

TK cannot solely rely on Carlos to be his support system because he has never lost a parent nor has he ever been an addict and it was selfish for Carlos to want to be TK's sole supporter. He doesn't understand what it's like to want to self-harm to numb away the pain, he doesn't know what it's like to accidentally go into cardiac arrest in an attempt to numb the pain. The constant depression and anxiety that is apart of Addiction. TK cannot skip meetings to talk to Carlos about things he cannot advise him on. TK especially can't skip meetings just to have dinner with his boyfriend. *It's better that he misses dinner than getting high before dinner.* Carlos knows is from what he said he read on Google. I'm very happy that Carlos learned in the end that he cannot play hero and fix mental health problems.

I'm happy Carlos learned that TK's sponsor, Cooper, is a tool to be used or like a therapist and is not a friend. I'm happy Carlos gained enough self-esteem to not take TK's needs outside of him personally.

I feel like in the whole "TK should have let Carlos in more" discourse, people are missing the fact that Carlos wasn't letting TK in either. He had plenty of opportunities to express his feelings and he didn't. He could have just told TK that he was feeling left out or that Cooper was making him feel insecure. But he kept pretending that everything was fine until TK came home to a passive aggressive solo dinner, which made TK (!) start the conversation. TK had spent the last however long it's been since the drugging going through withdrawal, the trauma of being drugged against his will, AA meetings every single day, grief over his mother, grief over his lost sobriety, and a multitude of twisted up emotions that he was only just beginning to understand, and he STILL found the strength to open up a dialogue when Carlos wasn't willing to do it. He should get a little credit.

I've sat on this the majority of the day so I could come up with a response that made sense bc honestly I've been waiting on an ask similar to this since the discussions started. It really got away from me too so all my points after 1 can be found under the cut.

1st: I never took TKs credit away. I've said I know more than once that he was trying. He actually had a conversation instead of running away, he heard what Carlos said, he came home instead of going to a meeting etc. They were in some ways communicating. So to imply that I haven't given him that is not fair.

2nd: was the dinner passive aggressive? Sure. But let me just say, I would've done the same thing and have done the same thing to my husband more than once. After so long of cooking for 2 and cooking for 2 on a regular basis, when the other party (a) quits eating with you and (b) blatantly disregards your cooking even tho they KNOW you cook every night and don't bother to tell you they're not going to be eating with you, you get tired of it. Does it always get expressed clearly? No we're human and sometimes we want them to feel like we feel. So no I'm not going to find fault in Carlos for doing this when I've done the same. Plus it made TK really see him for the 1st time in who knows how long which I'll address in a later point.

3rd: I disagree that Carlos wasn't willing. He asked about Cooper. He tried to have that conversation with TK about his meetings about not knowing things. Had TK been paying attention he would've picked up on the nuances of his expressions and tones, he would've known Carlos was feeling things that needed to be duscussed. Did Carlos explicitly express his discomfort? no. But Carlos strikes me as the type that he's not going to say anything bc he knows TK is going thru a lot and he's not going to add to his burden. He's going to deal with his feelings on his own. And when TK blew him off about going to meetings (and yes that's how I saw it. Carlos was offering all this support and TK blew him off as if he didn't want it or need it bc he had other people that understood better) that's going to cause Carlos to shut down too. He's going to internalize even more bc TK is coming off as uncaring. Carlos is seeing the love of his life struggling and he wants to help in any way possible. He wants all of TK. But he also sees he's not getting it. He sees TK coming home late, he sees TK not eating with him, he sees TK being happy and lighter after meetings and spending time with Cooper and he doesn't know how to handle it without making TK feel bad about it so he internalizes and tries to handle it himself.

4th: TK isn't the only one going thru all these messy complicated tangled feelings. Let me remind you what all Carlos is going thru too:

Idk that Carlos was close with Gwyn, but he called her Gwyn when he still couldn't call Owen anything other than Capt. Strand. So I'm gonna say they had a connection deeper than what we saw on the show. He lost her too. But he's going to push that aside for TK bc its TK's mom. But I can guarantee Carlos feels her loss too. (I'm thinking about my dad and my aunts in this scenario when my grandfather passed away 4 months ago. Their feelings werent any less than ours just bc they're the in-laws in the scenario. And Carlos's feelings shouldn't be any less than TK's) Carlos's feelings surrounding Gwyn’s death shouldn't be just pushed aside either but the show/writers are really good at doing that.

Carlos was put on leave for a death on the job. Was it ultimately his fault? no. But I can guarantee he's still carrying that with him bc even tho we got to see him work thru some of that with Grace it wasn't a magic fix it all.

Carlos was also drugged and we have YET to see how Mr. Control Freak handled that. Sure it's worse for TK bc he's an addict that's having to go back thru and work for his sobriety and I feel for him. So much. But that doesn't excuse him shutting Carlos out. They both were victims in their own home once again and they should be dealing with the consequences together.

Carlos is dealing with all of this and feeling guilty that TK was put back at day one. Bc if you remember how he was after the house fire, he's going to be blaming himself for not figuring Sadie out sooner and for not protecting TK from her.

So you wanna talk emotions and feelings in the relationship? TKs not the only one going thru things.

5th: I've rewatched the "fight" scene and I'm sorry but I didn't like how TK handled it. No communication isn't their strong suit, they've proved that multiple times. And I HAVE and will continue to give TK credit for sitting there trying to talk about it instead of running. But my main problem with the dialogue of it is (a) TK just assumes Carlos is upset bc he thinks he's cheating. But he should know Carlos better than that. (B) he should know how Carlos is a fixer and how he takes on everything and how he finds fault within himself for everything. So (c) him telling Carlos point blank he wouldn't be enough isn't fair. Yes TK knows what he's like as an addict and he knows what he needs and that's fine. But it's not fair to not give Carlos a chance to understand. He's clearly been shutting Carlos out of the whole process and this conversation or "fight" feels like he's going to continue to do that without understanding where Carlos is coming from. He might say Carlos has all of him. But I don't see it or believe it anymore than Carlos did.

6th: I think you're discounting Carlos’s strength as well. Yes it took a lot for TK to say what he kinda said. But also had TK been paying attention to begin with, he would've picked up on Carlos’s feelings sooner. He would've seen Carlos was struggling just as much and it could've been addressed long before the passive aggressive dinner fight. But I'm going to venture out to say, TKs not been at home a lot. And when he does come home it's probably just to sleep bc he's obviously not eating with Carlos. I'm going to even pose the thought that he hasn't even bothered checking in to see how Carlos is handling everything bc he's worried about hanging on to his own sobriety and I'm sorry but that's slightly selfish when you're in a relationship. So Carlos even broaching the subject after TK brought it up and sharing his feelings knowing he's going to upset TK when it's the last thing he wants to do took a lot of strength as well. Bc he told TK exactly what he was feeling and how he was questioning his place.

Lastly: TK made the effort to come home instead of going to a meeting at the end, so why not just take that extra step and let Carlos be there for him? That was related more to his grief than his addiction in my opinion and there's no reason he couldn't have turned to Carlos in that moment. I've expressed my feelings on everyone grieving differently and needing that time to yourself but at the same time if he didn't want Carlos’s comfort why even come home? Yes he was making the effort to let Carlos know he heard him the other night, but besides coming home what did he really do? Make Carlos feel even worse that he made TK feel like he had to come home when he so obviously didn't want to. The writers handled that whole scene wrong in my opinion but it was nice to see what Carlos learned about TK and how he handled and applied it and was able to take that step back and give TK what he needed.

If you made it this far than kudos. I've tried to express myself over the last 2 days without bashing or hating on either TK or Carlos bc really I fault the writers for a lot of things and choices made with these 2 characters. But this one felt like it needed a lot of explaining on my part and I'm not meaning to bash TK or come across that way, I'm just countering your points with things I found wrong in the episode and things TK could've handled better.

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I can't believe he compared the situation to TK's aa sponsor and how they're similar. They're not the same. I hate this so much.

Dude, me fucking too. I just can’t understand the logic behind some of these thought processes.

I am going with canon info here, so stay with me for a minute:

*TK & Carlos get drugged in their home – TK, an addict in recovery with 1 (or 2 depending on if you pay attention to any type of timeline), starts going to AA meetings.

-After going to a week’s worth of meetings, he asked one of the people he had connected with at the meetings to be his sponsor.

-THAT night he went home to his boyfriend and told him that he had asked Cooper to be his sponsor.

-Also in that scene we hear Carlos say that he had been hearing a lot about Cooper lately – TK wasn’t hiding him at any point.

*When TK needs to go to a 2nd meeting in a day, Carlos gets jealous (I get it is due to his not understanding what TK is going through, etc – but TK wasn’t hiding anything – He was open that he was struggling as he even agreed that it would be his 2nd meeting of the day, he just couldn’t name what exactly he was struggling with.).

*When TK got home from dinner, Carlos was petty as hell about Cooper (I do understand why – I am just going with what we were shown in canon.). TK wasn’t hiding anything from Carlos – not that he had a sponsor, that he was a guy, that he was struggling. I am not an addict in the early stages of recovery after a forced relapse – but even I can’t always give my struggles a name or tell someone else what is in my head, especially if I know that they haven’t ever been in a similar situation.

*I know that people didn’t like it that TK told Carlos that Cooper was straight, or that Carlos responded with “I know you aren’t cheating TK” (I may have that off a bit) – but to a man that had been cheated on, that was important to say. TK knows what its like to be cheated on, he wanted to make sure that Carlos understood that wasn’t happening – in any manner.

*TK had zero intentions of hiding Cooper from Carlos – at any point – he knew who was at the door & asked Carlos to answer it. Cooper’s first words to him are telling him how much TK talks about him.

--It isn’t TK’s job to make Carlos feel included in his recovery – but we see him talk to him, listen to him. Carlos’ jealousy was his own issue – not TK’s.

*IF we want to talk about overstepping boundaries – Carlos doing a background check on Cooper would be an over step. Carlos calling him (even though it was the right call) was still an over step. The difference is that TK never tried to lie, hide, or keep Cooper or his recovery from Carlos.

*in contrast (& also canon):

*Carlos didn’t tell TK that he was even best friends with Iris until he had to admit he was married to her – 5 years since the last time they spoke

*Carlos only told TK the truth about his legal relationship status once the ‘dream venue’ opened up in an insanely short amount of time.

*Carlos could have addressed this situation at any time and constantly CHOSE not to.

Carlos hid a marriage from his life partner for years, while TK was honest about his AA sponsor (the person that helps him stay sober & alive) from the start. Totally not the same thing, I don’t understand why they are trying so hard to sell it as an equal situation.

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“Someone that loves you.” (original poem)

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Tbh, that's how American police tend to be in real life. 🤷🏾‍♀️

The police in this show are completely negligent. They rescued a victim of a serial killer, and instead of believing her account they just assume she’s delusional because she has a mental illness. They don’t take forensics or properly search the house. They fumbled this case entirely and are the reason why Carlos went back in the first place. Not only did they fail both Iris and Carlos. A serial killer targeting mentally ill women had killed who knows how many women? And because they’re homeless and mentally ill he was able to victimise vulnerable women for so long, because they’re easy targets. AND as if to further prove how useless they are, they then failed to come up with a lead and a civilian who is not trained in this field at all, is the one to connect the victims? They’re useless.

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I found your book

Remember when gossip girl accidentally wrote an incredible love story between Blair and Dan and they fucked it up for no reason.

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the sheer comedy of Dan saying to Serena “you can be with someone like me, and still be best friends with someone like Blair Waldorf” because he and Blair are like. the same person in different zip codes.

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THEO ENGLER IN EVERY EPISODE: S03E02 “I MARRIED AN AXE MURDERER”

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all the kids are tragedies but nate, vanessa, eric & dan are Shakespearean tragedies (doomed by the narrative) while jenny, blair, serena & chuck are Greek (doomed through their own fatal flaws).

loosely based off x

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i’m really drunk but like. i can’t believe that gossip girl centres around classic film (blair’s dreams/her love of audrey/all the episode titles) and dan and blair’s relationship is built on a shared love of classic film and they just . fucked it

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no nuance November: dan humphrey was the woman in the dair relationship

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Dan takes everything from Chuck :’)

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Don't be shy! Share what the best Dair fanfic is.

This is so true though. The best fanfic I've ever read is in the Dair fandom.

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DAN & BLAIR – 10 YEAR ANNIVERSARY October 17, 2011 | Season 5 Episode 4, “Memoirs of an Invisible Dan”