#get that authentic bf experience

[emry-stars-art]

Follow up to this post, since I COULD NOT know peace until I got the “shy angry cat finally trusts you enough to come sleep on you” energy of this concept out of my system. Thanks @jtl-fics (😘)

And DOUBLE THANKS Ash for putting it in word form 🥹 you can read this sweet little exchange here! 💕

[saturninemartial]

Hi friends, it's me yet again. I've decided to focus on writing the modern AU where Sanji is a drag queen; the name of the AU is now bloom!

I'm going to write a multi-chapter longfic for lawlu meeting and getting together; the name of this fic will be daffodils. The last chapter, I think, will be about zsn's wedding, where loof is zoro's best man, and he's invited his now-bf law. The fic will have a lot of found family stuff, friend shenanigans, loof meeting cora, SEX, and romance and fluff (and humor). Chapters will alternate POV, starting with Law!

I've already written the openings to the first and second chapters!:

(Featuring Mexican Luffy and Spanish Sanji, because I can. ✨️)

I'm also going to write a oneshot more focused on zosan. After they're married, some of the friends go to a queer prom (event for adults who get to live the prom experience as their authentic selves), where Sanji (as Chouquette) and the band will be performing. There are flashback segments to when the East Blue crew were in high school, Sanji was presumed to be cishet and going to prom with Pudding, and Zoro was pining painfully. Juxtaposed against them being 30 years old and married, and Sanji confidently dolled up in drag. And then they go home and have sex with feelings. :)

Follow me for more updates, and feel free to send in your questions, comments, and even ideas! <3

[lifeofpriya]

I love your Jack writing!! Could you do a headcanon of how dating Jack would be like? <3

oooh, a headcanon! okay, so this is my first time writing one, so please forgive me if it's absolute crap 😔

Jack as a bf would be very reliable and dependable. he'd be the kind of boyfriend who is always there for his partner, he always keeps his promises to the best of his ability--barring his jet-setting career--and overall, i feel like he'd place high importance on providing you a sense of security

Jack as a bf would be very adventurous and energetic. he likes to keep the relationship exciting and dynamic by bringing you along with him to several of his tournaments. he would CHERISH making new memories together and exploring new experiences together

Jack as a bf would be very down-to-earth and honest. he is very open and transparent when it comes to communication. he really values honesty and authenticity in his relationships, so he won't be afraid to speak his mind and be straightforward with anything that might be bothering him

Jack as a bf would be very playful and fun-loving. it's a rare treat we see from Jack off the court, but when his playful and lighthearted side shines through, you simply cannot get enough of it. British humor quite often has a bit of understatement and irony to it, and I think he would love to make you laugh with his dry wit

Jack as a bf would be very athletic and driven. with his career as a tennis player, he's very disciplined and goal-oriented. i think he'd enjoy active dates whether it be hiking, cycling, or even playing a few friendly sets together

Jack as a bf would be very supportive and competitive. he loves being your cheerleader for your pursuits, whether it be related to your career or it's a hobby you're passionate about. i feel like he'd also not be afraid to have a healthy competitive streak with you--he always pushes you to be your best

Jack as a bf would be very charismatic and charming. with his public persona, Jack would be great at charming people; he's the life of the party, but he also knows when to dial it down for a quiet evening in

Jack as a bf would be very stylish and well-groomed. the burberry fashion show and the vogue uk photoshoot. enough said

Jack as a bf would be very patient and understanding. being an athlete requires discipline and patience, and i feel like these qualities would translate well into his relationship and make him a pretty supportive and understanding boyfriend

Jack as a bf would be very family oriented. while his career demands a lot of his time, Jack really values and cherishes any quality time he can spend with his family an friends

[absolutebl]

This Week In BL - GMMTV Holds the Line

Feb 2023 Wk 1

Being a highly subjective assessment of one tiny corner of the interwebs. Organized by which ones (in each category) I’m enjoying most.

When they say “famous last words” this is what they mean. 

Ongoing Series - Thai

My School President (Fri YT) ep 10 of 12 - They are so stinkn’ CUTE as bfs. Possibly the cutest. I chuckle a lot with this show. And that’s great, very serotonin inducing. Also 2nd half had good soapy drama tension with the music competition + the mom’s surgery at the SAME TIME (gasp). Can’t wait for next week.

Moonlight Chicken (Weds YT) 1-2 of 8 - Oh it’s great. Messy gays struggling with both internal and external conflict. It has a Taiwanese gritty queer authenticity to it. EarthMix are perfect for these roles. Khaotung is the most adorable thing ever. And GeminiFourth are fun to see as new characters. Fourth is showing off his acting chops, the way he holds his jaw and mouth for this more sullen complicated part - it’s completely different from Gun. His acting style reminds me of Nanon a bit, he’s very nuanced in his facial expressions.   

Never Let Me Go (Tues YT) ep 9 of 12 - 15 minutes of cute bf and dumb tattoos and then SUFFER! I love how quickly Palm put to rest your bog standard gay boy fantasies about a bisexual’s options. Palm was basically: “All the things that you dream for me with a woman, I can do that with you.” Honestly? I wasn’t that moved by the noble sacrifice of this episode. It was fine. More peril please. Looking forward to things going very very badly for the next couple of episodes. Bring on the pain GMMTV. 

Hit Bite Love (Sat YouTube) ep 3 of 6 - Baby Dom is quite the kink dilettante, I don’t think I’ve ever seen a kinkster with more varied tastes. Maybe baby just hasn’t found his true fetish yet? I feel for poor Shogun who just wants a boyfriend who treats him decently and ends up with Mr. Experimental. The humorous outcome is, of course, predictable. Not wild about the stepbrothers storyline (despite my taboo preferences). Really? I just want more King and Burger.

609 Bedtime Story (Fri WeTV) ep 11fin - With the exception of Mum, every character suddenly started acting totally OUT of character. Anygay, Mum comes back to find Dew single and all obstacles to their romance magically cleared. The pub staff setting them up was cute. But all in all it felt like we were suddenly in a completely different show. Series review below. 

I cannot believe we have 3 BL’s airing AT THE SAME TIME from GMMTV. It’s insane. I remember when it was exciting because we had 3 BLs airing at the same time at all.

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

HIStory 5: Love in the Future (Taiwan Weds Viki) ep 7 of 10 (or 13&14 of 20) - It’s an office romance BL, so I like that office politics is complicating matters for both of our couples. I personally don’t believe in scions (with very few exceptions, we know it tends to be bad for a corporation, and that has certainly been my experience). Still, it’s suitably traumatic to see our couples in angst over the power transition. The confession scene for the leads was very sweet. And a nice kiss. And cute bf. Taiwan always just does these beats better than anyone else. 

Candy Color Paradox AKA Ameiro Paradox (Japan Fri Gaga) ep 8 fin - K needed to realize O is a big boy. Yes we get it. Bummer he couldn’t figure out that for himself and had to be told by somebody else. I do feel sorry for the bartender character who keeps having to deal with all of these gay boys and their inability to communicate and resulting overdramatic depression. Meanwhile O needed to realize K needs him. And they both needed to learn to communicate, these… journalists. Good kiss and decent sex scenes for a JBL, with an HEA. Careful Japan we may start to develop expectations. I bumped up my rating on the strength of this finale. It was good! Series review below.  

Individual Circumstances (Thurs Viki) 7-8fin - I like the resolution and explanation for the conflict, a lot more than I liked the conflict itself. The kiss wasn’t awesome, but it wasn’t entirely dead fish either. However, Korea has proved that it can do better, so I was annoyed by it. Also, no shirtless scene this time around, we were robbed. Series review below.

The End Of The World, With You AKA Bokura no Micro na Shuumatsu (Japan Sun Gaga ep 2 of 8 - This is way too high heat for them to end it happily. It’s all v weird. I guess I’ll keep watching? Even if everyone dies, this one is not gonna ruin me the way Eternal Yesterday almost did.

It’s Airing But I’m Not Watching it 

My Beautiful Man S2 (Viki & Gaga) - Because there are only 4 episodes, I decided to wait and binge this one. What can I say? I just do not trust Japan. Sorry I’m too scared, those of you braver than I must watch first - I salute you and look forward to the gifs.

Egoist (Japan) cinema - Japanese movies are notoriously difficult to get ahold of.

Marry My Dead Body AKA Ghost and I Becoming Family (Taiwan) - movie about a police officer forced to marry a ghost.

Cafe in Love - Can’t find it 

Finished this week

609 Bedtime Story 

An interesting time slip concept and a great set up ultimately disappointed. It opened strong, on one of my favorite under appreciated Thai actors: Plustor (as Vee) in a side bartender romance with younger bisexual king, Games. Unfortunately, it went downhill from there. OhmFluke’s solid chemistry and romantically soft kisses were ill served by a reformed rake meets rich-kid cheater pairing. While it was nice to see Ohm play a part with more animated facial expressions, his was the only character that remained consistent. All in all, this was a confusing show about disloyalty and parallel worlds that never made sense or stayed true to its characters. A promising start, confusing middle, and disappointing end. I don’t say this lightly, but Oh My Sunshine Night is better, and OhmFuke deserve better than either. 6/10

Individual Circumstances 

A second chance romance between a movie director who was once promising and a writer who disappeared due to past hurt. Stars JunQ (main rapper of MYNAME) and Han Jung Wan (Mr International Korea winner). Reunion romances are not my thing but I liked the bratty director despite his stalking (and prob because of his naked chest). Using a guitar to torture someone is entirely appropriate, in my book/BL world it happens all too often. I did want to know what happened in the past but the mystery got drawn out too much and the tsundere character became frustratingly mean spirited as a result. I like the resolution and explanation for the conflict a lot more than I liked the conflict itself. I could tell what this show wanted to be, and what it could’ve been, but it simply never got there. In the end, like a host of other KBLs over the last couple of years, it is serviceable but eminently forgettable. 7/10

Candy Color Paradox AKA Ameiro Paradox 

Innocent but talented gay tabloid journalist partners (and falls in love with) a jaded player bisexual cameraman. This is a solid JBL of the more emo, cringe, and navel gazing variety that never really resonates with me. The main pairs’ chemistry felt weak and their characters were pat (for live action yaoi, I’ve seen or read this couple a million times). Bringing Izuka Kenta in to guest star was a stroke of genius and also challenging, because he has a complex history with JBL which I could not forget as I watched him EAT up the screen so hard he made the leads feel insipid. There were a lot of aspects of this show that felt more KBL than JBL. I missed the kinky edgy pushing boundaries we usually get from Japanese office romances. It did have a stellar ending (featuring a decent kiss and 2 nice sex scenes, you go Japan) but for me CCP was fine, just no more than fine. 8/10

Look you know how I feel about JBL, when it’s good it’s some of my absolute favorite (Seven Days, Old Fashion Cupcake, Minato’s Laundromat, Takara & Amagi), nothing else whips me into wit and eloquence and film crit like it, but when it’s off, for me, it’s really off. And Ameiro never gelled with me. It was too much work to watch. I don’t like chewy BL - nourishing and necessary though it may be for others. 

Gossip

Issues and Controversies of Thai BL Actors - I get asked about these a lot, so I’m just gonna point you all at this YT henceforth.

Viki picked up Boys Planet so I’m watching it. I have FEELS but I’m not going to ruin a perfectly decent BL blog with Kpop reality TV, no matter how pretty. Just know I’m over here suffering for 4 hours every week. SUFFERING. Some of the singing during the first ep alone was SO BAD it put Thai BL boyfriends to shame. I am so glad they got 3 vocal coaches in this show. People better vote with their goddamn ears and not just (as they did with iLand) much lower down. (Oo, I’m salty already.) 

In Case You Missed It

Feb releases list is here.

2023 forthcoming BL master post. (see comments some are inaccurate, NOT UPDATED)

Next Week Looks Like This:

I am so spoiled these days, now I’m upset there isn’t a good KBL airing right now. Do you remember when we barely got one or two a year? What a demanding monster 2022 turned me into. Anygay, 4 more Thai BL starting this week... 

Destiny Seeker (Tues WeTV ) 1 of ? - Feb 14 we think, MDL is janky on this one. Engineering student Songkram is head of dorm 3, for "strong & athletic" students. Aye is head of dorm 2, for the "good looking" students. Aye used to be Songkram's tutor and friend, but they fell apart after becoming dorm heads. Aye is actually in love with Songkram but thinks Sonkram likes someone else. Songkram actually likes Aye. So, Bad Buddy the pulp rebirth meets that weird Japanese “girls-crossdressing-as-boys for love and infiltrating secret society of hotness” tradition. 

Boyband (Thurs YT) 1 of 10 - Feb 16, it’s on the tin, BL drama about putting an idol boyband together. AKA how to make ABL suffer by combing favorite (celebrity romances, Kpop) and least favorite (bad singing) tropes.

Bed Friend (Sat YT & iQIYI uncut) 1 of 8 - Feb 18, but we’re looking for the rerun/uncut, so not sure on drop date for those. Fuck buddies get messy, AKA Between Us the second cuming, this time in an office (and on a desk). I have been waiting for James to hold down (or be held down in) a BL for years! Watch out, new kings of high heat are heading our way. 

Chains of Heart (Sat Gaga) 1 of 10 - Feb 18 Suspense thriller about a forest ranger, smugglers, memory loss, and lost love. Stars Haii (Cirrus in TT2) and Poppy (Porpla in YYY). Adapted from a Y-novel of the same name by TJ Tommy. 

Supposedly, but I’ve no idea where to watch it:

Jack Frost (Japan) - Feb 17 After saying goodbye to his friend, Ritsu had an accident and lost his memory. His roommate, Ikuya, struggles to rebuild their relationship and help him regain his memories. In the process, Ritsu falls in love with Ikuya, but he was unaware that they were already in a relationship.

Moments Of Love (Thai) Feb 14 Foremorfilm Production movie for cinema release. Was originally Golf (Director of 609 Bedtime Story & The Eclipse) to direct stars SmartJames (LeonPhob from Don't Say No) in a series. Is now something totally different and a movie. We are all confused.

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

Open boys are the best boys. Never Let Me Go

Moonlight Chicken with ALL the zingers, plus verse characters. Thank you GMMTV! 

Why so cute indeed. My School President 

(last week)

Current Kpop earworm? Villain by Key (Shinee) just on hard rotation. It’s great. 

[nothingbutloveforyou]

My boyfriend made me believe in love! As a kid/teen I always dreamed of love and romance, but never had the luck of being in a relationship. I ended up in a toxic fwb situation with a person right at the end of highschool, not being able to get out of it for years, until I met my boyfriend and had my first real crush on someone since I was 16. I took the brave step of confessing my feelings, which were reciprocated. This allowed me to finally escape the bad situation and my bf and I started happily dating! We've been dating for almost three years now and I still have the most joyful crush on him and vice versa. We've learned so much together and as individuals, growing and healing together while still being the goofiest silliest duo. I'm learning what real and healthy love is, about emotions and feelings and how to coexist with another human; we've created ways to include silliness in conflict resolution, and a safe space to be as imperfectly human as needed. The freedom and joy and sunshine I feel these days is unmatched, I've never felt more authentic and alive. It's a dream come true and I'll be forever grateful for every moment shared with him. We're also finally closing the gap in less than a month after being long distance for more than 2.5 years, and we're both so excited and ecstatic for our new adventure living in the same city. This is the person I want to grow old and experience life with. <3

ahh that’s wonderful!! i wish you only the best for what’s to come! 🤍

[femmefatalevibe]

Hi lovely! I'm in a dilemma. I'm in a loving relationship with a man but I've recently been craving intimate relationships with women to the point that it keeps me up at night. Sometimes I feel like such a creep when I find women attractive even though I know that it's acceptable. My problem is that I want to be with a woman soooo badly but I can't with my current bf and I don't want to lose him. Idk what to do. Thank you!

Hi love! This sounds like an incredibly tough dilemma. My heart goes out to you with this one. While I know this must be a stressful situation, I hope you're proud of yourself for being honest about your desire and sexual identity. Coming to terms with our authentic selves can be difficult sometimes, so congrats on engaging in this deep inner work with yourself while also being sensitive to your partner's needs.

I totally get why desiring someone outside your relationship would make you uncomfortable if you're in a committed monogamous relationship, but I hope that you will get more comfortable with your sexual orientation/attraction over time. I think, ultimately if you feel like you're being restricted from your desires by not exploring an intimate relationship with a woman, it's time to have a serious, honest conversation with your partner. Is he open to any type of FFM threesome? If he's purely into monogamy (I assume from what you wrote an open relationship is off the table), I think it's essential you let him know that you need to have an experience with a woman for yourself. See if he is potentially comfortable with a break in the relationship if a definitive breakup seems too painful/premature to discuss at this point in time.

You need to sit down with yourself and be REALLY honest with yourself about which option would be a greater loss: Losing your boyfriend or the opportunity to pursue an intimate relationship with a woman? Whichever feels like greater loss should guide your decision. While losing others is painful, the greatest pain is allowing circumstances to let us lose ourselves. Ultimately, the only right answer will come from your intuitive knowledge of yourself.

Hope this helps! Best of luck – sending love xx

[talleslittlelion]

Today I was getting emotional again thinking about how important these two characters have become to me~

As long as I can remember, I've always had comfort stories and characters to help me deal with different situations. Some for a short period of time and others who "live in my heart forever" like Bilbo Baggins, who still lives on a hobbit hole there.

I watched and read Komi Can't Communicate at the beginning of the pandemic, in the difficult first years - the story was funny, light and yet touched on more serious issues-, it was what I needed at that time. Seeing Komi's difficulties with social interaction, and then her determination to reach out to others and make friends, made my heart instantly warm! It made me review many moments of my school life and analyze them - and come on! Komi is a neurodivergent girl for me. She even do stims! - love this girl, she helped me a lot to connect with myself again.

But then we go to the year of 2022. Just like most people I was suffering side effects from the long time of isolation... I wasn't well. I felt like I'd lost years of youth, lost my few social skills, lost and sad. I was in a pretty dark place... and Mob Psycho 100 pulled me out of it and restored my hope.

When I started watching it felt like I was seeing a mirrored version of myself in Mob, it was even embarrassing - One of the phrases I repeated the most to my bf while watching it was "HOW CAN THIS STORY GATHER ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING I LOVE IN ONE PLACE?!!" - And the experiences passed by him were so palpable for me, it was like seeing my past, phrases I heard, people I met (unfortunately without powers just the tism lol). And after all that, seeing him evolve and grow, learning to accept himself and be his authentic version... man, that saved me. In truth. The lessons of this story stuck in my mind and the characters in my heart.

I'm not very good at making big analytical texts, even if they are more personal. But I needed to share a little bit of the impact that these two shows had into my life.

So "Thank you so much Shoko and Shigeo, you may be fictional but you changed my life for the better, in real life!" 💛💛 Hahah

[wakeupfreanz]

https://www.tumblr.com/wakeupfreanz/743606765626753024/or-maybe-a-better-direct-question-would-be-are?source=share

Thank you! Gladly surprised!

My take was that they were friends just not best friends or a complicated difficult one bc firstly it was Sh who forced the friendship when Hj prefered Sh was his hyung (and in my opinion they may had have a better relationship now if so but welp). Sh was very pushy and Hj had to accept it and then years later finally said he viewed him as friend lol

Also yk Sh loves skinship and Hj doesn't unless it's Yunho and sometimes the others if he initiates it. Then there is Hj prioritizing work, and the expectations Sh probably has, I'm projecting here from experience but I think it may apply to him to an extent that Sh doesn't truly totally accept those aspects from Hj sometimes and not respecting his boundaries (but generally he does) like in the beginning forcing the friendship, other times trying to hug him, making backhanded comments like he should be like this or that Hj is only good at celebrity things. And maybe building resentment from expectations not met, and that's just toxic to himself, and to Hj for putting on him those expectations, at the end he may never be satisfied and they could drift apart, but I think their work mostly, then their captain second mate same age relationship that they can't have with others, that also feels like karmic to me, and having things and values in common makes them stay good friends!

Other reasons I thought they weren't besties is simply bc they are so awkward they even say it themselves lmao and they seem to get along way better with other members! Like Sh with San and Wy specially and Hj with Wy and Yh(and it was so obvious with the skinship mostly with them I said), like Matz was forced but with the others it's so natural and just clicking well! With Yunho maybe if he was born months bf or he didn't follow so much the hierarchy rules, Hohong would be even better friends and rivaling Yungi!

I also thought that it could affect maybe having envy issues of how the members and fans treat them(the kind "mom" is liked better and allowed to be more feminine and the captain is viewed cooler and masculine, it's not balanced and they should be allowed to have both and treated equally). Also on their job projects. Like to me they sometimes are just two divas wanting the same on work related things like fashion and looks, being jealous and having friendly rivalry but also supporting eo :)

Oooh and other thing I was like? is Sh litterally saying that irl they Don't match like allergy but on STAGE they have great chemistry.

And fans just want to see the part that they have chemistry and ooh not only they are besties but they are couple!! When they are clearly just two queer friends SMH

Anyways, it's very nice to see they have way better friendship than I expected! Ended up rambling too much on this but thank u for reading and replying <3

I think if we could see more authentic interaction it'd surely shine through!

[alarrytale]

marte, about the zionist thing. I feel like Harry never speaks out about stuff like that because he’s afraid to show support because it might kill his career. I also feel like he is too obsessed with his career that he is willing to suck up to the worst people to get it. This fandom always gave me the impression that Harry is a push-over or can't think for himself or easily believes everything (tattoo artist Black Carrot also said how his former friends Lou Teasdale and her bf had a bad influence on Harry) I feel like this might be the case since harry keeps hanging out with these people....what do you think?

Also, marte, always when zayn calls out people in his songs like "fake friends" a lot of zquads think he is talking about harry. A lot of solo zayn fans really hate harry and talk about how harry (and the other 1d boys) never stood up for zayn when he was being discriminated because of his color. This feeling only became stronger when Harry won a Grammy and Zayn tweeted about how awful the Grammy's are....I feel like Z also doesn’t like harry bc he sees H is kind loosing himself in order to become a hollywood supernova. Solo zaynies also say h wanted the hiatus for himself and was mad when z left first.

Final question (sorry😅) do you enjoy harry and louis' music?.....because I like their taste less and less....

Absolutely final question (😂sorry), do you also feel like the GP is starting to dislike harry more and more...because the moment somebody makes a nasty comment about Harry it gets like tons of likes (20k). Only solo harries like him, but I feel like the GP don't really like Harry....if you agree, why do you think that is?

Hi, anon!

I agree that one of the reasons he might not speak up is because of his career. The issue is polarising. If he speaks up he'll lose fans and if he doesn’t speak up he'll lose fans. He's in a bind though, because while some of the people in power, his management, coworkers and friends are zion*ists or zioni*ts-sympathisers, the majority of his fans are not. The majority of his fans wants him to acknowledge the genocide and ask for a ceasefire. It might lose him brand deals and opportunities if he does speak up. But if he's not in a postition to take that risk and be that brave i order to do the right thing, who is?

I think it's a big difference between being a 16 year old wannabe celebrity moving alone to London from a small northern village and being a well established 30 year old successful man. He might have been easily influenced when he was younger and powerless, but he should have some world experience now and grown to have his own values and opinions, and not just adopting others.

About Zayn. I think there is some jealousy there stemming from H being shown preference during 1D and groomed to be a star. H was given privilege not afforded to Z. I think fake friends is a general critisism of not being able to trust people's intentions in wanting to befriend you when you are a celebrity. H does have a lot of fake friends. And the Grammy's are awful, Z is right. I think the Zaynies (Zquad?) are judging H for things out of his control. He's is losing himself in order to become a superstar, but it's not of his own choosing.

I enjoy Louis' music, i don't listen to Harry's (only heard about five songs ever). I'm pretty sure the more they both move away from the pop genre and the less mainstream the sound is, the less people are going to like it. I don't care what their own taste in music is as long as they stick to making pop. I'm concerned about where Louis is taking his sound and image for his next album. It might not be as bad as i fear. We'll have to see.

I do feel a negative shift in how people in general percieve Harry. He's getting more and more critisism on social media and a lot of the critisism is warranted. It's from both his own fandom, other fandoms and the gp. He's got image problems, relatability problems, overexposure problems, an authenticity problem and a hypocrisy problem. He's not addressing anything so the rumours, false image and false impressions people have of him just grows and grows. He's not doing anything to manage any of it. I don't know where this will lead. We'll have to wait and see.

[steelycunt]

ridi i'm LOVING all these unpopular opinions!! music haterism is always justified imo and soo entertaining also love that i agree with you 100% on basically everything 😌 some of these things just had to be said…

i thought i didn’t have anything to add because ts, hs etc have all been spoken about and i don’t listen to modern music enough to have strong opinions on any others but then i remembered my BIGGEST parasocial enemy (who i never talk about bc i don’t really have that good a reason to find her annoying i just do) is beabadoobea…

apologies in advance but she sort of represents everything wrong with the music industry rn to me so maybe a rant is justified here? anyway taking this opportunity to say i think she’s so overrated and not in a unique way, like it isn’t new for people to get careers from how they look but in her case specifically it annoys me sm because of what her fans are like and also it’s close to home…as in my cousin is one of her best friends from school so i knew of her when she started releasing music on band camp and had to watch her make a music career off being pretty on instagram with the four chords my cousin taught her on guitar and a voice that’s just…fine, and whatever everyone has to start somewhere except she got a record deal when her sound was completely underdeveloped before she’d had time to learn anything about music or her own artistry and like fuck around experimenting for a while.

which is so common these days i think w people blowing up on social media and getting handed careers i.e riding on the people who can actually play their instruments and getting loads of money thrown at them to make really bland four chord nothing songs... like in the first few years of her career she made so much music and it was all so boring and sounded exactly the same, even now it might be unfair but i do just assume any vaguely interesting part of her output is someone else’s work like sorry she’s never had to come up with her own fully fledged ideas or concepts and she’s been working with the pressure of commercial viability the whole time, any potential she might have had i just think was squandered by having everything come too fast and too easily or maybe i'm being generous and her authentic sound is just boring idk because it still doesn't seem like she has anything to say…all this wouldn’t be as bad if her fans weren’t sooo insanely annoying about her + as a person i have no real reason to but i just do not like her :| my cousin is still good friends with her as well so i have to pretend i know nothing but the picture of her i’ve built from things my cousin’s said…just aggravating, alsoo she’d played at my work once when my friend was on shift and her ex bf that looks a tiny bit like george harrison was sitting at the bar the whole time drinking water and not talking to anyone while she was doing coke in the bathroom and he looked so pathetic my friend started talking to him to cheer him up in between serving him his next cup of tap water…

HELLO MY DARLING!! oh my god i didnt realise she needed to come up until you said it...bebadoobedobee...beadbeadooebadoo..clapping n cheering for your rant because youre fucking RIGHT i have a few friends who like her and have tried to get me to listen to her and she was just. appalling truly and as you say not even just in a ah shes trying shes young she'll get better kind of way but in a this is genuinely unbelievably soulless and bland and boring and says so little that even she seems disinterested with it. the inside scoop on her from your cousin is delicious also gbfskjfskd her poor sad george harrison boyfriend..

i think youre so right and i dont mean that new artists shouldnt be given a break or an opportunity or anything but like you say, when theyre being harvested on social media, where a lot of the time look is everything (as i believe it is for bebadoobebdoo, her look her 'aesthetic' pinterest-board fashion sense does play a part i really think it does because there is no way her music is strong enough on its own to be successful) and where they may not necessarily be super experienced or practiced yet (which again, i appreciate, theyre new), a lot of money goes into getting songs out of them which are inevitably boring unimaginative four-chord songs that do not have enough substance to make anyone feel anything. including the people singing them. i cant imagine that beabadoobee demonstrated enough genuine musical promise to be given a record deal so i have to believe its either her image or the idea that well if we give her tons of expensive resources maybe then she'll end up putting out something good.

there have to be new artists out there who are more talented and interesting and would do more with the sort of record deal thrown at beabadoobebee than beabadoobdbbee did...surely...i really did try to like her because my friends raved about her so much so i listened to a fair bit from her and her music was just so staggeringly nothing. i think you make a good point about how the fact that she got a record deal so early on probably has sort of stifled the music she makes/her ability to experiment with it but im not sure im as kind as you because i do fear she is just not very talented perhaps. sorry giggling at her sad george harrison tapwater drinking boyfriend again poor lad..

[askgothamshitty]

And I forgot to add that when I think of being in a lesbian relationship it feels so liberating, I was on Twitter and I somehow came across these beautiful lesbian couples, the way there was no (or barely any) centering around men, the way they talked about their femmes and butches so lovingly (hope im using this properly). The way they call their butches their bfs or that there are he/him lesbians and also their politics and the way they challenge a lot of heteronormativity is so beautiful to me. I never got triggered once (maybe out of a bit of jealousy bc I want that for me now in 2025) but I never felt angry seeing them, never felt bad or upset or like I had to cry in a negative way, with the way I feel when I see the way straight men and women speak about relationships and sex (it sounds like literal slavery 😭). Even when I think about romantic relationships with men in my mind when I have to cope I rarely feel this happy. I have had plenty of crushes on IRL women but only few on men and mostly were fictional (I know this doesn’t dictate anything but I am just trying to rationalize here). I guess this is really hard on me bc I have spent so long (currently it’s not that bad but I still mourn for my youth and childhood back) caring about femininity, beauty standards, comparing myself to other women, subconsciously competing with other women for male approval and attention, dealing with my hatred for my appearance bc of desirability, having struggles with my interests bc I didn’t think any man would want me due to them bc they may not be “lady like”. Ofc I don’t struggle with these thoughts much now but they still come when I start getting triggered, when I see male obsessed people (especially women as it confirms to me in my subconscious that this is what I SHOULD be like and not whatever tf I have going on now) and when I to see or experience misogynistic and heteronormativity propaganda in my life. But now I’m about to throw that all away, it genuinely feels like a major death in my family like I’m shedding a part of me tht was a huge factor of my life. A part of me that was ingrained into me that, “this” is what womanhood is. It’s a death in a good and way, like yay for no longer doing those things for men and their approval but I guess I’m upset bc I spent a lot of those years ESPECIALLY my childhood/teenage years performing for men and the patriarchy and acting in a shitty play but now the show is over. Ofc I will still have to continue to unlearn my internalized misogyny but I guess that’s something I’m so afraid of. It sounds so nice but the unknown…I know it will make me happy and will release so much guilt and pressure that I have been feeling (I literally used to identify as asexual that never ever wanted to have sex at all, that’s how bad it was) . But now it’s just overcoming that fear of letting go completely and being my authentic self I was meant to be and that scares me if I’m being so honest bc this misogynistic male obsessed society is all I know…

Yes butchfemme culture is so beautiful! It’s so underrepresented though, most people (even queer people) don’t know about it. But it can be freeing to see it as a lesbian and realize what kinds of relationships are possible!

So much of what you’re saying lines up with compulsory heterosexuality. All women are primed to become men’s wives; it’s like their path is life is predetermined. So when lesbians start to discover themselves, it can be pretty earth-shattering to say the least. That’s what makes coming out such a transformative process. Again, you are not alone! Once you talk to other lesbians, especially lesbian feminists, you’ll be shocked to see how so many will use almost the same words verbatim to describe their lives.

I’m so happy that you are starting this journey ❤️

[theuniverseawakens347]

Okay but seriously .. understanding trainers

It’s going to take time before change in that world happens - magic.

But what to look for ..

How do you pick a bf or gf or spouse or what make you think one child is more trouble than the other inside and outside ya home n family pods

.. T.hooww ya want to show your body that’s what you call appreciation.. I get it

I was told loosely MY BUSINESS CARD IS MY BODY .. ( weird sexualization grooming ) …

But what’s THE MOTTO for my journey when I get ready for clients.

You seem to have stayed in high school 1/2 college sports thinking NO D1 training and even then ya got princess diva crying ass Landon James .. Michael Jackson by sight of “talent” but psychologically a fucking t.hooww .. Michael Jordan how many injuries ya got!?

But you train mental like Serena and Stephen .. who came before you Shaq!?

How’d you copy the great to become ur great ..

Who let the game fan base out rule the purpose of the journey .. wasn’t the money for everyone involved.

Who’s the STARt .. what was THEIR GOAL.. what did U SEE IN LIKENESS TO URS N THEIRS!??

- that’s weird another parenting playground. But more sheep. Bigger Hurd.

… T.hooww appreciates her gains but in competition w other small frame turned big = FUCK YES ATTENTION ..

Me was small gain = POWERFUL IN MY “DAMAGED BODY” I LOOK THE JOY IVE ALWAYS FELT .. COME GET IN KEN WERE GETTING BARBIES MENTAL MOTOR SKILLS BACK. .. I always had curved and butt n tits just not like the other girls ..

YOU WANT TO BE SEXUALIZED .. yes every has been misgroomed or purposely guided to that terrain but again .. ya over stay “welcome” or “picked up game” and continued..

How ya continue abuser or victim abuser or survivor.

T.ooww victim abuser continued like India .. ( someone bullied her first infantry — recording yrs yes but someone elder than her still responsible.. ancestors not mentally telling her do stupid shit it’s someone IN THE AREA PHYSICAL TOUCH REACH AROUND THE FAMILY N FRIENDS) …

T.hooww ya post clients !? Not really and if so video but how long they last .. but ya jump to big following quick - paid promotions and ya get clothing .. weird rush of excitement cows brain lost logic but also highlight .. where was it - BUSINESS PLAN WHO FAIL BY OVER Delivering .. but where’d it get you in the end .. again WHAT WAS UR MOTTO TO BEGIN.

I worked equinox I’m excited to be in a training prestigious environment after what I came from ( Barry’s it cute but stop orange theory - we wana get you muscle but it’s just endorphins really .. n dance fit thing on la tea Santa Monica ) ..

I brought my excitement w me Ben said “it’s just a revolving door for trainers “ that hurt but my thought

“Well maybe cause YOU don’t actually want to be here” .. anyways ya be around me YA INNER CHILD COME OUT ON MY END NOT KNOW UR EXPERIMENTING N TESTING ME .. ( wow we haven’t seen medical results like this since …🙂)

Anyways … MY BIGGEST FUTURE WANT AS A CHILD WAS TO BE AUTHENTICALLY HAPPY. HAY BITCH. - bhad bhabbie. ( snatched )

.. my clients I don’t post their results but I posted their words .. reviews … some aren’t comfortable having photo post and I’m pretty sure I asked that .. but I didn’t feel like posting them I rather train n a video than photo cause someone take that n photoshop n say their clients got results .. okay… - bought followers n ya snaked too or sexual 24/7 BUT MATING CALL STANCE OR “I’m PROVING A POINT IM REAL” - that’s thirsty weird of ya in a healing environment- must be abuser.

🙊

.. anyways I was building steps trying not to take on too much in MY BUSINESS.. but life threw me where it needed and I flowed.

Mind body n soul TRAINING = OTHER SIDE OF FEAR. UTOPIA OSOF. 🙂

K bye.

🐕

[immatalk]

HOW TO DIE ALONE (2024) on hulu

I was looking forward to this show but unfortunately, it’s an undercooked, baffling slog with little depth.

The aimless, 30 something premise isn’t new, but seeing the trope tackled by a black female character was exciting and I was hoping the show would if not say something new, at least be interesting. This wasn’t the case. In fact, the episodes that I did watch (1-5, scanned the rest but it was more of the same lifeless, shallow tripe and life’s too short to suffer) were so superficial, cliche, and bland that I felt like I was watching a parody. Just stock phrases and twitter takes and dated dialogue that bogged the show down beyond belief. I’d expected that the series would be sentimental and silly with a hint of corniness. A mix of heart and laughter. Instead it was callous, contrived and predictable. The material was so bad that it actually made the actors worse.

I appreciate that the creator is a black woman and writing about what I believe are her own experiences, but the show was stuffed with shallow writing and bleak stereotypes of characters stuck in lacklustre retellings of better stories gone by. To be fair, there’s a level of authenticity wrt to black culture and certain aspects of black womanhood. Specifically, the unique loneliness that black women face that eluded others who share only race or gender and the insidious invisibility fat black women in particular, face in many areas of their lives. I applaud Rothwell for showcasing this part of the narrative as fat black women characters are rarely shown depth and care, and even less get to tell their own stories. But that’s where the accolades end. Rothwell’s character was aimless and sad, trying to get a handle on her life after dying and being resuscitated but rather than meaningfully explore that, the show hollowly gestures at her sorrow whilst laughing at Melissa’s pain. I’m aware that HTDA is also a comedy, but the audience should be laughing with and not at Melissa. Unfortunately, this season did not find an adequate balance in that arena.

Neither did it find balance with the supporting cast. Every character was stereotypical and corny. I kept waiting for even a kick of nuance and it never came. The one character that had a little compassion was the brother, who not only didn’t deserve it, (both writing and acting were extremely lacking) but was so useless in the overall story that I fail to see his relevance even now. I also found the ex-bf angle stale, though I appreciated that the writing doesn’t go the lazy route of making the new fiancé cartoonishly evil. She was (in the episodes I saw which heavily featured her) kind, sweet, and gracious. As was the other black female minor player, Kaya. Unfortunately their appearances were short lived as Melissa’s close friends were non black women. This isn’t necessarily an issue but it did strike me as odd that Melissa was the only main black woman character. Odder still was the fact that the only others with extended screentime were her vicious, cruel and selfish mother and aunt. I could see that the show was going for the comedic relief with these two but none of it landed for me. . Their constant hating and snarking made for cheesy, caricature like performances and by the time the episode ended I was over everyone. I got about 10 minutes into the next episode before stopping and skimming through the rest because like I said before, I’m not here to suffer. And from what I caught, the show never rose above its meagre offerings. There were glimmers of something great but it never quite took off because the show kept undermining itself with silliness and superficiality.

Overall I think this was an underwhelming effort that felt strangely mean spirited and shallow. Seems like trying to enmesh condedy and drama is the main issue here and had it simply been one or the other perhaps it would’ve thrived. Or maybe not and Rothwell is simply better reciting others words rather than creating her own. Hate that for her. But I did see glimmers of potential even through all the muck, and I’m willing to give another show of hers a try, perhaps even a second season of this one. As it is I don’t see this show gaining a significant audience or making it past these 8 episodes. Because it squandered the execution something fierce.

But like many non black creators who get multiple chances, I think Rothwell should be given another as well. As should other black female writers. Afterall, the work of one should never solely reflect the experiences of many.

TL;DR: bleak, bland and shallow. fat black women deserve more.

[persorene]

hey so I think you said your partner fairly recently came out as enby right, so if you don't mind me asking how did they do it and how did you respond, I'm also in a long term relationship and questioning my gender identity but I'm not sure how to bring it up with my bf

This has probably been in my inbox forever so I'm so so sorry if I'm late to this!

Yes they did come out back in April, but it was a long time coming. My partner and I have been best friends since kindergarten, we started dating at 14, married at 19, we're 29 now. The entire time I've known them, they've been gender nonconforming but they were raised in a conservative Christian household in a rural area so that was never an option for them. They had to mask as hyper masculine to not be harassed by their family, thought they were anyway, I'm not joking, when we first told their family we were dating as teenagers they said, and I quote "oh thank God we all thought (partner's name) was a (f slur)" so you can imagine their home life as a closeted queer kid.

When we got married and moved away they started to be more themselves. Around 2020 during lockdown (cliche, I know) they started experimenting with dresses more femme, doing makeup, piercings, etc. Around 2022 they told me they didn't feel like a man but also not a woman and weren't sure what they were feeling or how to process it, and I was totally supportive of that and told them to take all the time they need... but literally the day after that conversation we found out I was pregnant so everything kind of went on the backburner because it was a medically complex pregnancy (preeclampsia iykyk) and then I got pregnant again 4 months after that baby was born so it was a very busy two years where we really didn't have time to reflect on anything outside of pregnancy and babies. Then our second baby was born in February and we had more downtime after that since we were done with babies and getting out of the survival state that puts you in. They again went back to presenting in a more gender nonconforming way and seemed more confident in that presentation.

The day they came out in April, we were in the kitchen, I was cooking, they were chopping the vegetables and just very casually said "I'm nonbinary" but I could tell simultaneously they were scared to say it out loud and also elated to finally be able to say it. I was just thrilled for them, like I said, this was a longtime coming and I had actually, back in 2022 when they first expressed some discomfort in their assigned gender, joined tons of support groups for trans folks and their partners so I could learn how to help them and navigate their feelings and how to be supportive when they came out. Plus, they'd been this way as long as I'd known them, it was a fundamental aspect of who they are.

So for me it wasn't something that shocked me or that I had to come to terms with, plus I'm bi, so no weird sexuality feelings to work through in that area for me. It was just. All I felt was joy for them, because you could literally feel their happiness radiating out of them when they finally came out. Our experience probably isn't universal, like I said we've been inseparable since we were 5, I've seen every version of them and loved them all, and I think that kind of longevity may change things but I also think your partner would probably be understanding and supportive! Someone who loves you would love the best, happiest, healthiest and most authentic version of you as well.

[maurypovichofficial2]

my bf broke up with me which means i get to have an authentic listening experience with the new taylor album small wins 😌

i love this for you bestie

[misswoozi]

Haii DBB anon here!! Sorry ive been mia.. been a while hehe, just casually waking up from my slumber bc I heard someone say dotae, hallowed name of the shippiest nct ships. You're so right in that they are so topdoyoung and bottom taeyongcoded. If we squint hard enough though, a few of the rare scenarios where they could be switched are:

when taeyong is high coming off the stage(and he just has that aura when he performs yk?)and doyoung thinks it's so hot when yongie is in that headspace bc the duality like come on... so he rolls with it and lets yongie continue to lead the dance

Doyoung getting roasted alive especially brutally by the entire team one time, and taeyong gets possessive competitive bc only he can fight doyoung 😤 watch tae summon the most ridiculous, petty behavior that would make even dionysus hesitate

Crack scenario- baekhyun decides to prank doyoung by sharing, from personal experience, that his vocal quality after bottoming has just that tad bit more depth in range and emotion.

THIS IS SO INTERESTING TO ME. I like the way you headcanon these two, OP. There's something very authentic about the idea of Taeyong coming off-stage feeling so confident. I DO think Doyoung would be Very Receptive to that side of Taeyong. That would easily be a version of his bf that would drive Doyoung bananas 😭

WE SHOULD TALK MORE ABOUT THIS SCENARIO SOMETIME 🫶