#get passport online fast

[reorientation]

I'm ftm and I've been on HRT for 5 years, had top surgery and I generally pass really well. My passport says I'm male, too. But until very recently, I never even saw a real cock in person, despite being a fairly horny person - I've only had sex with two people, both afab and transmasc as well. Ironically, I was the dom-ish one in both of these relationships, too.

But... I kept spending a lot of time online browsing through humiliation and misgendering porn. Reddit, tumblr, all that stuff. I kept fantasizing about being used like that. The rougher the better. I've got so many fantasies about it.

It took me a long time to finally install grindr. First, I chickened out and uninstalled it. And then installed again. Uninstalled. Installed.

And one night, around midnight, I started writing with someone. He lived 5 minutes from me. Told me I could come for a quick discreet fuck, just that, like I'm a fleshlight. And... I did. I went out, came to his house, got bent over and for maybe 8 minutes, he fucked my pussy, groped my ass and made me feel like a toy.

I loved it.

I didn't even get to cum, obviously. He didn't even ask for my name until afterwards. And then I told him to hit me up if he ever needs to unload again. It was my first cock ever, first one I've seen and first one I've let inside my most private parts, and the first cock even saw me as a fleshlight because that's how I advertised myself.

I kept grindr on my phone after that. I'm not using it too much, but it's there, waiting for me. And I did have a few more encounters after this one. I guess it awoken the slut inside me...

While this first guy used a condom, I was quick to find a second one. And I was so horny that I let him cum inside me (he even took some pics). I'm not on any contraception apart from T, which isn't contraception, and I'm scared like hell of getting pregnant. So afterwards, I had an awkward pharmacy talk, because I came in and said 'I need emergency contraception', they asked if it's for me, they stared at me and said 'it's for females'. I didn't sleep at all this night (because he was too busy with my body...) and I stood there like a dumb bitch for a few seconds while the guy (he came with me) said 'he's female' and that unlocked something in my brain and I said I'm trans.

Today, I might get fucked raw by another guy again. I had enough brains to get on birth control after that awkward pharmacy talk but apparently not enough brains to stop offering my cunt to strangers...

Oh also it's the ftm who just send you a long ask about fucking people from grindr and having an awkward pharmacy talk and possibly fucking another stranger tonight, I thought I should add some kind of name so you know who I am so uhmmm I guess my deadname would be a good fit and knowing you know it along with the fact that I'm offering my pussy to strangers will be kinda hot. So hi, I'm Alice uhh, and nobody used this name for me in years...

🎵One pill makes you larger and one pill makes you small 🎵

Except for you, Alice, I suppose it's "keeps you small" - without that little pill, you might already be swelling. 🖤

Sometimes things happen very fast, don't they? You hadn't even seen a cock in real life, for all those years, and then just a few days after you sent your first Grindr message, you were out in public listening to the man who'd just fucked his cum into you tell a stranger that you're female.

How did it feel to have them looking at you, Alice? To feel their eyes on you and realize that they knew you had a fresh load of cum inside your pussy. To realize that after all your efforts to pass, you still ended up having to admit that you have a fertile womb, and that a real man had put his seed into it.

It felt good, didn't it? Being a cumdump, and having them know it. Being humiliated in public because you'd been so desperate to give your pussy to a stranger. Having them see right through your identity to the needy little cunt underneath.

But maybe they're not seeing through anything. You've been dreaming of "misgendering" and letting men use you as a fleshlight without even asking your name. Maybe this is your new identity - not a man, just a needy little cunt.

[russellsppttemplates]

I do not know if this is true but you and Max going on vacation somewhere and he gets denied a rental car because of his age

Note: yes, it happened in Portugal, I think! As they reported on the news, it's the rental company's policies to not let the car be driven by someone under 30, like, insurance and stuff like that. Apparently, it was fine in the end and people made a bigger fuss of it than necessary.

"I couldn't book it in advance, they kept denying it, probably some issue with the passport", you mumbled.

"We have time, it's not like we're we're a rush", you reasoned, following the signs into the rental company you needed.

"Hi, we were looking to rent a car, please", Max said as he arrived at the surprisingly quiet desk, "do you have one one in mind?".

"It's a Mercedes AMG GT", Max said as the employee went to grab the papers regarding insurances and contract and, you assumed, the keys.

"Max Verstappen driving a Mercedes, hm?", you teased him, resting your head on his arm while you waited, "what do you know", you smiled, kissing his clothed arm.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Verstappen, I'm afraid you won't be able to rent our vehicle", the employee came back, "you're not old enough, that is. Our contracts only allow someone who is at least thirty years old to drive the car", he explained.

"That's why you couldn't do it online", you reasoned, now putting the pieces all together, "well, his agent is over thirty, so you can give that car to them", you pointed to the rest of the group.

"That's okay, we can just swap the contracts, you have this one for a BMW, it's a very nice car, too, still goes pretty fast", he offered.

"You're too old for something, see?", you teased your boyfriend, "just a nice baby face, handsome".

"I'll show you just how youthful I am", he raised his eyebrows as he drove out of the parking spot.

(Thank you for your submission ✨️)

[trulynamelessworld]

Hey so after watching six episodes of The Handmaid's Tale I have come to the conclusion that we are approximately two steps left from it happening.

Look, the show practically gives a step by step guide. Look at the American election results, and the way Canadian politics are leaning. We're getting there.

So, heres what you're going to do:

Stash some cash: If you have extra funds, withdraw some. Stash it somewhere you would think to look that other people would not. Useful in all kinds of emergency situations.

Update your paperwork: My passport is expired, I should update that. In my case, I'm a dual citizen so I could get out of dodge fast if I needed to. Keep it somewhere safe with the cash. We're talking passports, birth certificates social security numbers, etc.

Keep physical copies: This is the digital age, but guard physical copies of what you do have closely. I have lots of cds and a cd player, pictures of me and my partner, books. Burning books is already a thing, I highly recommend purchasing books straight off of banned book lists.

Read up on your herbs: Its not witchy voodoo shit if it works. Theres simple stuff, mint tea for nausea, raspberry leaf for cramps, mugwort for you know what. Be careful, I am not saying this is safe, but it may be necessary. Also everybody likes a good cup of tea.

Bug out bag: For if you're really committed. This is a bag for survival situations, or if you have less than two minutes to leave your house. Read about it online. It should have everything you need (clothes, toiletries, food, medication) if you need to leave with what you can fit on your back.

Write: Keep written record about anything you don't want to forget. Journal entries, song lyrics, recipes, whatever. It does not matter, notebooks are something you can throw under one arm and go.

Powerful men are not your friends, religious leaders are not your friends, that acquaintance with questionable world views is not your friend. Create a close network of people you trust with your life. I'm not joking.

I am aware I sound cuckoo bananas to some of you and thats fine. I sound cuckoo bananas to myself. Women are losing agency, queer people are losing their lives, disabled people are being forced further and further under the poverty line. I check all three of the boxes above, this is reality.

If you have to pick one or two, pick Stash some cash and Update your paperwork.

[beefromanoff]

Project Mockingbird Ch. 6

summary: a little insight into Charlotte's backstory, lots of training.

pairing: Bucky Barnes x OC

author's note: there are more visuals than I usually use for this chapter, but it's just so fun! let me know what you think and if it's distracting! thanks for reading, xox!

tag list: @bangtanxberm (let me know if you want to be added <3)

chapter list

_________________________________________________________

Six weeks. 

It had been three weeks of living at the compound. The longest she’d lived anywhere, except - no. That doesn’t count. She didn’t live there, she was kept there. 

In the time since her imprisonment, she’d flitted from place to place, from life to life. Being a quick learner, she slipped into different places almost seamlessly. Her first stint in the real world had been in Siberia, not exactly an ideal place to be. She’d traveled across Europe by train-hopping, stowing away, and hitch-hiking before eventually settling in Austria. 

Her mistake was being a little too reckless with her abilities. Though she’d gone relatively unnoticed at first, it was difficult to make it anywhere without money. That’s when she started doing what she did best…fighting. A few underground fights, cash payout. It was a cakewalk. Through a few connections she made in the seedy world of street fighting, she moved up. People wanted to bet on her, knowing they’d win. It fast-tracked her to bigger fights, higher winnings. She’d even given thought to making that her new life, it was something she knew and something she was good at. Something she was made for. 

Until she saw the most beautiful, elegant thing she’d ever witnessed. In her studio apartment, rented for her by the man who’d been making a shitload of money off of her fighting, she sat surfing through channels just like every other night. On the screen, a strong, graceful girl hurtled through the air, landing perfectly on a blue mat. It was the first time she’d ever seen gymnastics. Charlotte couldn’t tear her eyes away. 

The next morning, she’d packed her limited belongings in a bag and headed for the train station. The man called her 27 times when he realized she’d left. At least, that’s how many she counted before she threw the phone out a train window. 

In less than a week, she’d learned everything she could about the gymnastics world, including the fact that the National Championship meet was being held in two weeks in Boston. With no ID, no passport, and no real identity at all - flying internationally wasn’t an option. However, when a cruise ship acrobat had suddenly received an urgent call from her ailing mother and fled to attend to her, Charlotte was there ready to step in. Her “audition” was enough for them to offer her a permanent contract performing on the ship. Politely declining, her only goal was to get to the United States. After ten days of performing for sunburnt tourists on the ship, they docked in the Port of Boston with just enough time to spare. 

Knowing she’d need to incentivize the powers that be to allow her to participate in such a prestigious meet as a nobody, she went back to the drawing board. While thinking of how to come into a large sum of cash in less than four days, she overheard a group of Harvard students talking about how they didn’t know how they would ever pass the BAR exam that weekend. In less than 72 hours, she walked out of the last exam with twenty thousand dollars cash in her bag. Four students, desperate and wealthy, had jumped at her offer to take their exams for five grand each. All it took was a night of leafing through their textbooks with a box of takeout in her lap to have it all memorized. 

With one day left until the meet, she bought the most beautiful leotard she could find. All black, one long sleeve, beautiful jeweled detailing. She watched footage of old Olympic meets, NCAA gymnasts getting perfect scores, anything she could find online. On the day of the championships, she stood waiting by the front door long before sunrise for the first judge to show up. She offered him ten thousand dollars cash to put her name on the roster for the day. He immediately accepted, leaving Charlotte pleasantly surprised. She’d been prepared to offer the full twenty. 

The rest is history. She competed last, swept the meet with perfect scores in every event. Her name was in headlines across the country by the next day, even making it on ESPN.

For a little while, she thought she could have her dream life after all. Thought her abilities could do more than the violence she was bred for. It was beautiful, but it was fleeting. Just before the conclusion of Olympic Trials, she was framed for using performance enhancing drugs and kicked out without ever even being drug tested. She knew gymnastics was a very political sport, and if she could bribe her way in, it was only feasible that someone else could have bribed her out. 

So she went back to fighting. This time in Vegas. After a few months of that, her penthouse suite rented indefinitely with three additional safes full of cash, she decided to switch to gambling. Poker and blackjack were her favorites. She’d managed to keep that going for a few weeks before casinos started to pick up on it, not knowing how seriously they took card counting. In her naive newness to the modern world, she thought that winning would be allowed and rewarded. It wasn’t the case. Not in the casino, not in gymnastics. The second someone caught wind of her unfair advantage, even when they couldn’t begin to explain it, she was kicked out. So her life became a run from one ruse to the next, catapulting to the top of whatever she tried and then forcing herself to abandon it as soon as eyebrows started to raise. 

Until Nat showed up and finally gave her a chance to stop running. 

And that was six weeks ago. 

After breaking her conditioning, she’d found a loose routine. One that didn’t involve lying about who she was or figuring out how to conceal all the cash she had without so much as a drivers’ license to open a bank account. These days were good. She’d wake up early with the team, following a different member each day. Since she didn’t really have a role of her own, she helped out where she could. Sometimes watching and assisting Tony in his lab, sometimes watching Steve train the SHIELD agents. Everyone had something to do, a role here. Except Charlotte. Up until now, it didn’t really bother her. She liked the freedom to drift around the compound, not looking over her shoulder. After about a month, however, she was beginning to feel restless. 

Which is why she asked to train with the SHIELD agents two weeks ago. 

“I thought you didn’t want to be an Avenger?” Nat had raised her eyebrow. 

“I don’t,” Charlotte protested. “But I’m…bored, I guess. I don’t have anything to do here. I feel like I’m in the way. If I can train with them, at least I’ll be prepared, you know…if anything happens and you do need me.” 

“Something tells me you’re already more prepared than even our veteran agents.”

“Please, Nat, I need to do something.” Her eyes were desperate. 

“I’ll talk to Steve.” 

The next week, she’d begun training. Alternating between hand to hand combat, weapons’ training, and intelligence tactics, Charlotte was in Heaven. There was a schedule, a routine, and always more to learn. Although not all of the agents felt the warm fuzzies about having her there. The team had chosen to limit the amount of information given on Charlotte for her own privacy, but her performance had left people with suspicions. 

“Fuck me.” Agent Bronson mumbled under his breath, stepping forward when his name was called. 

Steve frowned. “What was that?” 

“Nothing.” He ran a hand through his hair as he climbed into the sparring ring with Charlotte. “Let’s get this over with.” A few of the other agents snickered from the sidelines, relieved their name wasn’t called to be her partner. 

“Don’t sound so enthusiastic.” Charlotte rolled her eyes. 

“Come on, Rossi, we both know how this is gonna go. Just try to leave me a shred of my masculinity this time.” 

“I’ll see what I can do.” She smirked, feet set in a defensive stance. As soon as Agent Bronson began to raise his fists, her eyes tracked every miniscule movement he made. The way his eyes flicked to her feet, debating a leg sweep to take her down. The muscle that tensed in his neck when he prepared to throw a punch. In fractions of a second, her mind cataloged his fighting style, instinctively reacting to dodge and duck all of his attempts. 

Eight, nine…She counted each of the blows that whipped past her. Steve had scolded her at the end of the past week, telling her that if she was going to train with the agents, she had to at least try to stay on their level. She told him she’d give each agent a ten swing head start before she went on the offensive. Ten. 

When his boot swung over her head, Charlotte dropped to the ground, swinging her leg to knock his planted one out from underneath him. His back smacked the mat, making the spectating agents wince. From her crouched position, she interlocked her legs with his, flipping both of their bodies with the momentum. Agent Bronson was flat on his face before he even knew what happened. In another half second, Charlotte had his arms locked behind his back with her knees driving his shoulders down. 

“Fuck.” His voice was muffled as his face pressed into the mat. 

“Alright, let him up.” Steve stepped in. Charlotte climbed off, extending a hand to help him up. 

“I tried to make it quick and painless.” She grinned, whispering in his ear as he stood. 

“Much appreciated.” He grumbled. Of all the agents, Derek Bronson had been one of the more welcoming ones. He had some security from being one of the top performers, but still fell short when it came to Charlotte. 

“Okay, team, what can Agent Bronson improve in his hand-to-hand?” Steve looked over the group, waiting for a response. The agents exchanged glances, shuffling their feet. “Anyone?” 

No one spoke up for fear of being assigned to spar with Charlotte next, to demonstrate what they thought they could do better. After a few moments of awkward silence, Steve spoke again. “Alright, let’s wrap it up. We’ll resume on Monday. Good work today, agents.” He patted Agent Bronson on the back. “You’re a good sport.” 

As the agents filed out of the training room, Charlotte took her time gathering her things. She knew she wouldn’t be invited to wherever the group of agents chose to get dinner and happy hour drinks outside the compound, so she preferred not to see them make the plans at all. 

“You bored yet?” Steve crossed his arms and smiled. 

“Do I look bored?” 

“You looked bored the second day you got here.” 

She laughed. “I’m not, actually. I really enjoy it. I could do this all day.” She winked, using Cap’s favorite line against him. 

“I know you can, that’s the problem. Why don’t you train with us?” He held his hands up defensively. “Just train, that’s all. You don’t have to go off base, but it would be a little more of a challenge than this.” 

Charlotte narrowed her eyes, thinking. “I’ll try it out. But don’t get mad at me when you end up like Bronson.” 

This time, it was Steve who laughed. “I’m a decent sport, too.” 

_____________________

The next morning, Charlotte and Bucky jogged around the lake, having lost track of their laps an hour ago. 

“Good God, do you ever get tired?” He groaned as she ran past the trail that lead back to the compound, beginning another lap. 

“Eventually.” She smirked over her shoulder. “Keep up, old man.” 

He caught back up to her, throwing a dirty look. “We’re the same age.” 

“Semantics.” 

“Alright, one more mile and I’m calling it. I want to do more with my day than run in circles.” 

Charlotte shot him a mischievous look. “Race ya.” 

They took off running back into the woods. 

_____________________

The training room of the Avengers Compound buzzed with anticipation as Charlotte stepped into the ring, her eyes focused, albeit a little arrogant. Though the buzz of her first session with the Avengers’ had made its way around the compound, they elected to keep it a closed session. The group of them was clad in their black training uniforms, meant to mimic the weight and feel of their combat suits. Since Charlotte didn’t have her own yet, she wore another of Natasha’s. Each suit was specially engineered for the one who wore it, meant to accommodate their specific skill set. Nat’s was thinner, lightweight and flexible. Sam’s was double lined to keep him warm in high altitudes. Bucky’s suit had a cutout for his left arm, allowing full range of motion for the prosthetic. 

Sam, with his usual charismatic grin, stepped into the ring first. "I’ll take it easy on you, alright?" he held the ropes open, allowing her to step in. 

"I wouldn’t." Charlotte replied, her eyes glinting with challenge.

The spar commenced. Sam lunged forward, his wings extending to give him an advantage in reach. But before he could react, Charlotte sidestepped, her movements fluid. With a swift motion, she dropped to her knees and slid beneath the reach of his rings, grabbed his arm and twisted, putting him in a painful bind that dropped him to his knees.

"Damn girl," Sam breathed, his eyes wide with surprise.

"T’was a pleasure," Charlotte replied, releasing him and mock curtseying, barely out of breath at all. 

Next up the Black Widow herself. She stepped in the ring with an air of confidence, her eyes sharp and assessing. She must have noticed how Charlotte balked, not wanting to overstep on her first friend, the reason she was here in the first place. "Don’t you dare take it easy on me," Natasha reprimanded.

“If you say so.” Charlotte gave a small smile, preparing for action. Faster than Sam, Nat put her weight back on her left foot, aiming a kick at Charlotte's midsection.

Charlotte spun to her right, evading the kick. Nat was already striking again, punching across her body. Charlotte blocked, dropping her elbow in the crook of Nat’s arm, bending it and bringing them within inches of each other. Both women moving at once, their legs interlocked in the same takedown attempt. They rolled once on the floor, a blur of black neoprene. 

While Natasha was one of the most skilled Avengers in hand-to-hand combat, Charlotte was stronger, pinning the redhead down as they came to a stop. She held her forearm to Nat’s throat, knees pinning her arms down. 

"Impressive," she croaked, a flicker of admiration in her eyes. Charlotte stood and helped Nat to her feet. 

“Right back at you.” Charlotte’s chest rose and fell, breathing hard. 

Then came Peter Parker, all enthusiasm and boyish charm. "You ready for this?" he asked, a grin on his face.

"Are you?" Charlotte replied, smirking.

Attempting to go for the element of surprise, Peter shot a web at her feet, aiming to immobilize her. Having seen his tell, a clenched jaw and eye flick to the place he wanted to shoot the webs, she knew it was coming. Somersaulting forward, she rolled over the web blast and closed the distance between them. Without rising back off the ground, she delivered a swift kick to the back of his legs, buckling them and dropping him to his knees. As soon as he fell, she wrapped her arm around his neck from behind, pulling him onto his back on top of her. Each of her legs hooked around his arms, pinning them to the ground so he was at an impossible angle to web her. He froze, momentarily stunned.

"You're so fast," Peter breathed, eyes wide.

“So I’ve been told.” She untangled her legs from his arms and he climbed to his feet, offering her a hand. 

Finally, it was Steve’s turn, the one who’d convinced her to do this in the first place. "A little more fun than the agents?" he joked.

“I guess you could say that.” Charlotte tensed, knowing he would be the toughest of the three prior. 

The spar was intense, each blow whistling through the air as she dodged it, power oozing from his every movement. Charlotte anticipated Steve's moves with uncanny accuracy, her eyes keenly observant of his every shift in stance. Steve, in turn, pushed her limits, testing her stamina as the clock ticked on. His style was classic, controlled. He relied on speed and strength more than exceptional skill or strategy. 

The round went on longer than the previous three combined, Charlotte getting Steve in a near-pinned position three times, but unable to overpower him enough to keep him down. 

This time, she took a different approach. Steve swung with a hard right hook, and instead of dodging what she knew was coming, she stood her ground and took it. His fist collided with her jaw, blood immediately bursting from her split lip. Her head snapped to the side, but she didn’t lose her footing. 

“Oh, my God, Charlotte, are you okay?” Steve broke his defensive posture, eyes full of guilt. 

Exactly the reaction she wanted. 

In two moves, she swung her leg up, momentum carrying her into the air. Her legs wrapped around his neck and she twisted, throwing him to the ground. He landed flat on his back with a resounding thud, her shin pressed to his neck. 

"You're good," Steve admitted, a grin tugging at his lips. "Although some may say that’s cheating."

"All’s fair in love and war," Charlotte replied, blood dripping off of her face from the busted lip.

The other Avengers, watching with keen interest, broke into applause, their admiration evident. Nat cheered the loudest, recognizing her signature move in the final takedown. 

Bucky stepped forward and approached the ring, offering Charlotte a towel for her bloody face. “That looks like hell.” 

“But kinda badass, right?” She smiled, showing her blood-stained teeth. 

“Something like that.” 

Charlotte, slightly breathless but clearly exhilarated, wiped her face and stood to face Natasha, waiting to give her kudos. 

Bucky turned to Steve with a sly grin, clearly amused. "Well, well, Steve," he teased, rolling his eyes dramatically. "Losing to a girl half your size. What would Coach Tyler say?"

Steve gave an incredulous look. “Our high school wrestling coach, really?” He rolled his eyes. "Why don't you give it a shot, Buck? Let's see how you fare against that girl that’s also half your size." He raised his voice at the end, baiting Charlotte.

Bucky cracked his knuckles, his metal arm glinting under the training room lights. He stepped into the ring, eyeing Charlotte with a playful glint in his eyes. "Hope you're ready for this, sweetheart," he said, his tone mockingly confident.

Charlotte met his challenge with a smirk, her confidence unwavering. "I don’t know if you’ve forgotten, Barnes, but I was made for this." 

He grimaced ever so slightly, still not used to the flippant way she spoke about her tortuous past. The team had heard more about HYDRA in her six weeks at the compound than in Bucky’s five years. Clearly she coped with trauma differently than he did.

The two circled each other in the ring, the air crackling with anticipation. Eyes locked on each other, Charlotte raised an eyebrow and licked blood off her lips. Bucky lunged forward, his movements swift and controlled. Charlotte dodged his advances with ease, her lithe form moving as fast as his fists. She countered his strikes, her blows precise and calculated, although they didn’t seem to phase him in the slightest. Their movements were lightning fast, the spectating Avengers’ having trouble tracking the action. It was clear neither of them held back the challenge too tantalizing to back down from. The two didn’t spend a ton of time together outside of group settings, save for the occasional run, but they seemed to get along well. Their shared sense of grim humor was the catalyst for most interactions. 

Bucky tried to catch her off guard, but Charlotte anticipated his every move. He advanced on her, swinging with near lethal force. She executed a series of back handsprings, narrowly avoiding his attacks. The ring seemed to blur with her swift movements, a small nod to her brief stint in the gymnastics world.

"Show-off," Bucky remarked, his admiration evident. 

Charlotte grinned. "Impressed?"

“Don’t flatter yourself.” 

Their spar escalated, each move met with a countermove. Bucky utilized his strength, attempting to overpower her, but Charlotte danced around him, always one step ahead. She was incredibly light on her feet, her agility allowing her to evade his strikes effortlessly. Where he was strong and intense, she was quick and fleeting. She landed more blows, but they barely even registered. He swung harder, but she stayed out of reach.

After almost twenty minutes of intense combat, both combatants found themselves in a deadlock, neither of them able to budge. Flat on his back, Bucky's arm stuck up in the air, his metal hand wrapped around Charlotte’s throat. She perched above his chest, one shin pressed into his throat, the other leg braced on the ground, giving her leverage to push down harder. Their breathing became ragged as neither one conceded, fighting for oxygen as they continued to right each other. 

“Should we -” Steve murmured to Natasha, brows knit together. 

“Let’s see how this plays out.” She narrowed her eyes. “Worst case, they both pass out.” 

Steve frowned but said nothing.

In the ring, Charlotte tasted the salt of sweat mixed with the lingering metallic taste of blood. She grit her teeth and drove her shin further down onto Bucky’s throat. He grunted but didn’t concede, gripping her throat tighter. Sweat had caused a few strands of his dark hair to stick to his forehead. 

The corners of her vision were beginning to go dark, the sounds of the training room sounding like they were fading away. Charlotte saw the blood vessels in Bucky’s eyes reddening and knew he wasn’t far behind her. Their eyes locked, a battle of wills and stubborn pride. Bucky felt her wobble ever so slightly and made a snap decision. 

“Truce?” He croaked. She paused, ever so slightly, debating if she could somehow spin this into a fifth victory of the day before her lack of oxygen overruled.

“Truce.” Her voice was barely more than a whisper through the vice grip he had on her neck. They paused for a second longer, eyes narrow, as if neither one of them trusted the other. Finally, they both released their grip, Charlotte tumbling to the mat beside him. Both chests heaved, their senses flooding back as their oxygen was no longer restricted.

Charlotte looked to her right and grinned. “You called a truce.”

Bucky, still flat on his back beside her, narrowed his eyes. “I’d feel bad choking out the new girl the first time we sparred.” 

“Whatever stops the tears.” She winked.

The other Avengers applauded, climbing into the ring with them. Natasha and Steve pulled them to their feet. “Just when we thought no one was more stubborn than you, Barnes.” 

Bucky chuckled, shooting a glance at Charlotte. "She’s tougher than she looks."

“Wish I could say the same for you.” She raised her eyebrows, eyes fiery. His eyes scanned her face, amused. Just like in the hospital room over a month ago, she swore she saw his eyes flick to her lips for just a split second. 

The team’s enthusiasm drowned out their banter, equal parts shit-talking and compliments flying. Someone handed her a bag of ice for her chin. One one side, Peter was asking her to teach him a back handspring and on the other, Sam was mimicking her doe-eyed look to Steve right after he socked her. All of it was good-natured, all of it was warm. Even with the throbbing in her jaw and pounding in her head from almost passing out, she was happy. 

So much better than the goddamn SHIELD agents. 

[historia-vitae-magistras]

alfred straight up murdering his brother on accident just because he walked too quietly into the room is so fucking funny but how terrifying is alfred to regular humans? If he goes to casually throw some ridicously heavy thing he's working on over to the intern or whoever theyre not gonna get back up on their feet to chew him out for it lol. also... getting shot and squished by bisons still hurts like all hell right? does matthew start to get wary around him or is he just too used to it to be all that bothered?

Lmao right? I very much enjoy using these characters, especially fleshy loony-tune-style horror shows because good fucking god, it's funny. But its also very fun? Alfred javelining people into the water must be so fun. Alfred casually picks up Matt when he's on the sofa because he dropped his keys behind it. He will randomly rip up troublesome trees in someone's fields in the middle of the night. This is not a wholly negative, angsty or even humourous trait.

So for humans... not very as an adult. I think. Generally, Alfred puts his people at ease. He's handsome, funny, intelligent and friendly. Man has that kind of crooked smile and easy charm. The charisma, luck and social skills of the gambler and the grifters and drifters of the old Westerns if not the old West. When he was little and had less control because he'd get excited, I could see him getting himself in trouble and accidentally committing some violence. As an adult, I think he's much more careful around humans, and the only time he tends to bust out the super strength is to prevent accidentally killing humans. Picking up a car in front of someone getting aggressive will contain that person's aggression goddamn fast.

As for if things hurt, yes. Superheroes and Gods are boring for me to write about. I like making these fuckers creepy and overpowered sometimes, but I'm most invested in their humanity. So time to do the math. The average bison is about 816 to 1,088 kg, and the most recent record for a deadlift was 487 kg. So on the lower end of that, 816 divided by 487 is about 1.67; redeploy that as a percentage that's about 160% the strength of what's currently possible. I personally think this is why this dork is always snacking, so it has some effect on his metabolism and his physiology. He's not going to starve to death as fast as he should with that metabolism because there's that nation fuckery there, but my boy is peckish. So now that I've laid that nonsense out, I generally make him about 160% more resilient than the strongest human (yeah, my browser history is fucked, what about it?), but not in all ways because biologically, that would fuck up his brain something fierce cerebellum be whack big and I like my nerdy NASA boy. But I try to keep that 160 in mind, so it might sometimes be consistent? Maybe? But yeah, he's durable and walks away from a lot of things that most people wouldn't, but he can be shot, dropped, smashed, hit, etc. And his pain tolerance is limited because, again, that removes too much vulnerability and why are we invested in this nerd? Lord knows it's not patriotism on my end. Strong, but not indestructible.

Now with the biology and the physical aspect of my stupid brain's explanation of this yankee doodle dumbass (affectionate) articulated, onto the emotional and interpersonal consequences. This is a bit meta, but Alfred's perception of himself and his loved ones can reflect this fandom and canon. I don't know if canon makes them twins, but many people do despite some intrinsic differences in history, progress, culture and values. It's a valid take because who wants to lord over other people or think about being the superpower and the empire? And passport privilege, cultural dominance, and political hegemony are things that only come into play when we're online or in some sort of international situation. The world revolves around the US, but Alfred's 'first amongst equals' with the laurels of power is not his default setting. At home, he just wants to be another person. Abroad, he has to function on a different set of rules, and leadership, and that arrogance only comes out at certain points. He wants to be human, he wants to be loved, he wants to be normal. And it hurts his fucking feelings to be reminded he isn't, that it is lonely at the top, that no matter how similar, the Trudeau quote applies.

Matt's used to him, and Alfred's reasonably careful, but the gulf between them, Alfred's ability to just steamroll him if he wanted to (even if Matt would give him a hell of a fight) does leave its marks. Matt tries as hard not to show it as much as Alfred tries not to crush him. He's overjoyed about something and goes in for a hug, and there go a couple of subluxing ribs as he kind of affectionately slaps Alfred's shoulder like "indoor muscles! Indoor muscles, bud!" And its mainly because Alfred doesn't like thinking about being a weirdo, and Matt doesn't want to remind him. They want to be as equal as possible, but physics is a thing.

[trash-and-trash-accessories]

I don't want to be an alarmist. I don't want to run around screaming "the sky is falling" all the time.

But that's who and what I am.

I'm a queer Jewish anarchist living in a red state.

And it's time to start screaming.

There WILL be another far-right coup attempt in 2024. And with 6 supreme court seats and a house speaker, it will likely succeed.

With the courts packed, no military coup is required. An electoral coup utilizing the courts can, has, and likely will happen in the US. They have been preparing for this.

If this far-right coup is successful, we are looking at a ramping up of the already in-progress genocide which begins with queer people but will likely ramp up against the Latino community specifically, Jews, and other marginalized communities.

What can we do?

Well, the things that can be done at this point I can't say online. The short answer is, a full-blown people's revolution. Which is unlikely.

Joining activist groups already working on this will help, joining or founding mutual aid networks is vital, organizing and involving yourself in your local queer community in person, not just online, and getting involved in activism that way. Fighting and involving yourself in local politics - school boards, sheriffs, city council - can help keep your city safe. If this means running, backing candidates, or showing up to every school board meeting making sure these assholes don't win their censorship fights, do it.

National elections obviously matter, but regardless of who wins this election, the far-right is in position to steal it and overthrow the government anyway. It's very likely they will at least try, and probably succeed. They spent years packing the courts for this moment.

As long as our current supreme court members are alive and in office, we are in immense danger.

In the meantime, just about everyone in our communities needs to have a plan in place to get the fuck out of AT LEAST their conservative state, IDEALLY the country.

Flee the country

It can takes months to renew a passport, if you will need to in the next few years, do it now. US passports are self-ID, make the best choice for your safety, whatever that is.

Countries that offer the longest tourist visas (temporary, but get you in fast and some can be as many as 180 days)

See if you can transfer to another country at your workplace, if that's a thing you can do.

Make sure you are fully vaccinated as required by the places you are considering fleeing. Some countries require more/different vaccines than the US.

If leaving the country will be impossible, make connections with people in blue states and try to get there, or prepare to stand your ground and defend yourself and your community. I know most of my fellow Appalachians will be standing our ground. They can pry Appalachia from our dead queer hands. They can try.

Can't leave? Hide or Fight.

Stock up on your medications. Trans femmes have an easier time with this, you can have your cis women friends get a script for spiro via a dermatologist "for hormonal acne", and older women in your circle can easily get estrogen scripts "for menopause". These are also available online more readily, but be careful. Trans mascs may need to have cis men in their lives get t scripts, or take a lower dose of what's prescribed, then when your bloodwork is low, get a higher script than what you need and stockpile. This is medication fraud, and a crime. T is a controlled substance. But do what you gotta do.

Stock up on birth control methods, plan b, and abortion pills if you need them. These will likely be banned. You can get a long-term implant now, or get an additional birth control prescription via an online pharmacy, in addition to the one you are already using to create a stockpile.

Get medical training. Stop The Bleed is available online, for everyone, for free. EMT basic is widely available and relatively affordable.

Get armed, if you can. This especially applies to people running rural queer communes, as is popular in my region. We've all read Parable of the Talents (I hope), they will come for you. Arm, train, and fortify. Develop connections outside your commune who will worry about you if you suddenly go out of contact. You're not safe because you're rural and growing your own food. When they come, you want to at least take them with you.

Save, download, stockpile queer literature, queer websites, and resources that may be destroyed. A lot of people download the entirety of wikipedia. Scrubbing queer content from society will start once the far-right have taken over. That process has already begun on a smaller scale.

Join preexisting activist groups already working against these people, regardless of whether they are specifically queer-focused or not. Building in-person, offline connections will be vital. Information control will be the norm. Online organizing may become impossible.

If necessary and possible, scrub your online information, go deep in the closet, and wait it out. This is impossible for most of us, but it was a valid strategy for a lot of queer people and other minorities during the Holocaust. A lot of people survived by pretending to be something they weren't and simply waiting it out, obfuscating and working against the fascists when they could, and surviving to tell the story. Not everyone is a revolutionary. This often involved lesbian couples marrying gay men. Temporary detransition, and simply laying low. Fascist states fall eventually.

[canitalkaboutsomething]

F1 in America is and always will be cringy and thats just part of the experience.

Many of us were sitting down or standing up on an exciting Sunday afternoon when we F1 fans collectively saw the cringe-fest that was Will. I. Am and LL Cool J's star-studded introductions of twenty of the best drivers in the world.

And as we were watching and cringing and closing our eyes and opening them because we were getting some serious secondhand embarrassment (at least I was,) we collectively all asked ourselves why this was happening and was the Fanfare necessary. 

Among with backlash from Twitter, and even some drivers speaking up about how unnecessary and distracting it was to do these introductions, many people wondered why the promoters and event organizers would choose to do something like that, especially on race day. 

So, why did that happen, and why was it so cringy?

The simple answer is money. I think to those who know and may not already know that any sport in America is highly commercialized and starts not with the teams or the sport itself but the idolization of those who operate in it. It has always been this way, even with sports outside the united states.

For instance, I bet most people could care less about the stats for the Kansas City Chiefs or The Cleveland Browns. Still, they know who Patrick Mahomes, Travis Kelce, and Joe Burrow are, or they could tell you that Lebron James plays for the Lakers and Stephen Curry plays for the Golden state warriors. Still, they don't know their positions or stats, but they could tell you their jersey number, what kind of shoes they prefer, their latest Instagram post, and who they are currently seeing. It happens often.

So why does this happen?

In sports, especially in American sports, it is not enough to be good at the sport. You have to be the best, and you have to be likable. That starts with your online presence, how the fan base perceives you, and how others perceive the sport. It is simply not enough to attend a sporting event and be entertained. It is a performance from the time you, the paying attendee, walk into that sporting event until you leave.

That's why they have halftime shows at basketball and football games; they have professional cheerleaders, crowd participation events, and mini-games on the sidelines of Major and Minor league baseball Innings. These entertainment tactics ensure that people have a good time and want to return.

So why does this happen in F1 when it comes to America?

Fanfare and Fanservice. Events in America, as I've stated before, are highly commercialized. That's how it is. And, because America is so big and the interest is so varied, organizations and promoters are left with having to find a way to appeal to bigger audiences. But, in addition to that, interest in things peaks and then declines drastically. And because of this, one of their highly effective tactics is to induce this feeling of FOMO.

" If you're not in Miami this weekend, where are you? Oh, you weren't in Austin this weekend, then where were you? Oh, you're not going to the race in Vegas? I'm sad for you."

Fanfare and the Fear of Missing out is an effective way to sell tickets, and because the United States only experiences three races as of this year, and the continent of North America in total experiences five races, if you're willing and have money to travel to Mexico and Canada, there are not a lot of opportunities to see these races in person, granted if they even have a passport (which is a conversation for another day.)

In addition, you have Drive to Survive on Netflix, which has gotten more people into the sport, especially in America, and in my opinion, has helped pave the way to getting Miami and Las Vegas on the schedule. In addition, the show has given newer fans a glimpse into the fast-moving world of F1, even on an overly dramatic scale. And to some extent, they expect that type of drama and scale when they go to these races. So, therefore, the Fanfare has to be bigger and better than the last to ensure that the sport can continue to become popular in America. 

So the organizers use big names like LLCoolJ and Will.I.Am, and they invite celebrities like Tom Cruise, Vin Diesel, and the cast of Fast and Furious; they have had companies that invite influencers who have nothing to do with the sport, trying to get as much publicity on the event so that the rest of America has this feeling of wanting to be where the action is taking place.

For comparison, This is the same reason why Beyonce or Taylor Swift can sell their concert tickets at astronomically high prices because you are not paying to go to a concert, but rather the experience of seeing them in the flesh in real-time, even if your tickets are not great, and you were in the nose bleeds the entire time, you were there and got to see it. Which is the same logic promoters are operating off of for these races.

Now back to the obvious,

Was the Fanfare with the introductions, at that moment, necessary? No. Honestly, it was just poor planning. The time to do something like that would have been at the drivers' parade or any other time other than race day, but it is interesting because so many people want the Fanfare to be around the race, big Sunday race day, which in America is more on par with NASCAR. Not saying that the race isn't one to have Fanfare over, but the race weekend technically starts on Thursday with the press, so there were potentially other opportunities to engage in Fanfare all weekend. 

Now, will this backlash affect how other American races will go this year? Probably not. But I hope that in any event that it's just a lesson in what not to do on a race day, and hopefully, next year, we will get a different format.

[fdxsuhytf]

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[explanationation]

Important Life Side quests!

(No particular order)

1. Seizure/Epilepsy Training! (For free) By the Epilepsy Foundation it is an online module based program takes about 60-75 minutes but you will have three weeks to complete it. It will give you a Certification at the end after completing. Why this? It's important to know and quite interesting! Being seizure/epilepsy training certified also looks great on resumes and applications!

2. Food handlers card. Needed for any restaurant or fast food related job, and also generally helpful for at home cooking practices. Found efoodcard.com with a ~$7.99 fee. Online module based course regarding food safety practices. Is required for food related jobs and looks good on resumes and applications. When the course is complete you will have the certificate and 2 food handlers cards (one for you one for employer copies).

3. (If in the US) Memorize your social security number. It's asked for on almost all the important documents, often including hiring packets from employers.

4. Build your resume. This is more complex but if y'all are interested I can post separately an example! Important notes, keep it limited to one page, use only Harvard approved adjectives

5. Build a basic cover letter. Same as number four, I can post separately an example if it's wanted. But it is so much easier to modify a CV than it is to make a new one from scratch.

6. CPR/AED/First Aid training! Definitely important to know no matter your situation. But it is required for various jobs, and looks good on resumes and applications! Found online at RedCross.org with a ~$37.99 fee, you will have a certificate and an expanded knowledge bank at the end of the course!

(edited addition!) 7. Getting a passport! Never know where you will find yourself in the future and in the US these take up to 6 months to process and get back to you.

Links!

https://www.redcross.org/take-a-class/classes/adult-child-and-baby-first-aid%2Fcpr%2Faed-online/a6R3o000001vv3D.html

www.efoodcard.com/ (your state initials)

[shyadri]

GUIDE TO REGISTER TO VOTE

As elections are fast approaching, I think it is very important for people to get out and go vote. We are in a dangerous time in history, and we can’t let Trump win this year. I made a guide to help people figure out to register to vote, the different ways they can vote and what to do during the actual date of voting.

Check registration deadlines and voting dates and put it in your calendar.

This is for ALL THE DATES.

Registration deadlines? Put it in your calendar.

Have mail voting? Put it in your calendar.

Early in person voting? Put it in your calendar.

Election dates for primaries and presidential? Put it in your calendar.

Make sure you have these dates saved in your phone or calendar and put MULTIPLE ALARMS.

I recommend:

1 alarm 1 month before date

1 alarm 3 weeks before date

1 alarm 1 week before date

1 alarm 3 days before date

2. Check if you are registered to vote with UP TO DATE INFORMATION and register.

Go to the website https://vote.gov/, pick your home state and check RIGHT NOW if your name is registered.

You need to make sure that your information has your current legal name, address, and other information you might have changed.

If not, register RIGHT NOW by following the states’ instructions. Usually, you need a proof of ID (passport #, same-state driver's license#), your Social Security Number and sometimes 2 or 3 evidence of residence in the state (one most recent electric bill and one most recent water bill are 2 pieces of evidence for example).

NOT ALL STATES HAVE ONLINE REGISTRATION: The website will send you a link to the state website to figure out if you can register by mail or by person and where to go.

Important to consider:

Political Party Preference. This section is important. Here you say whether you are a Democrat, Republican or Third Party. It is so important because for primaries, most states are closed primary elections, where you can pick a primary candidate in your own party.

EX: You are a democrat in a closed primary election state, so while you could have voted whether you wanted Bernie Sanders, Hillary Clinton or Joe Biden to run for president as the Democratic Party Representative in 2020, you can’t affect the Republican Primary to decide whether to pick Donald Trump or another candidate to run for president as the Republican Party Representative in 2020.

Video on Primary Elections: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_95I_1rZiIs

Which State is closed or open primary?: https://ballotpedia.org/Closed_primary

3. Special forms of voting

3.1 Check if you are registered to vote BY MAIL

Now, this is very important, because not all states have vote by mail and/or don’t put you into vote my mail automatically. If your state allows vote by mail, SIGN UP WITH YOUR ADDRESS THAT YOU KNOW YOU WILL STAY ON OCTOBER TO NOVEMBER. That way, you can vote by mail, send the mail back and not lose a work, which most people can’t afford to lose. The vote website will tell you what to do.

NOTE: Many states will require you to have an excuse to vote by mail. Disability, 65+ of age, can’t miss work are all valid reasons, but check with the state website just in case.

Which states have vote by mail?: https://www.businessinsider.com/a-map-of-how-voting-by-mail-works-state-2022-11?op=1

3.2 Check if you are registered to vote EARLY IN PERSON

Some states will give their citizens like a week or more to vote in person before the official voting date. This is useful because

These days tend to be so much calmer and as such faster

Some states could let you vote on the weekend during this period, making it more likely for you to not need to miss work.

So please check if you can do this as well.

Which states can you vote early: https://www.ncsl.org/elections-and-campaigns/early-in-person-voting

4. KEEP CHECKING YOUR VOTING REGISTRATION ONCE A WEEK

This sounds insane, I know. But there have been cases where the system “suddenly messes up” and removes voters from the registration.

Millions of Black Voters Are Being Purged From Voter Rolls, Often Illegally: Report https://www.theroot.com/millions-of-black-voters-are-being-purged-from-voter-ro-1827808612

Study Finds States Purging Millions of Voters in Secret, Often Erroneously

Block the Vote: How Politicians are Trying to Block Voters from the Ballot Box

A tumblr thread alking about it: https://wilwheaton.tumblr.com/post/189832334754/yeahiwasintheshit-fuckyeahtx

I want you to check the damn registration website, I want you turn it into a weekly activity. I want you to go so often that it becomes as ingrained as Youtube or Twitter or Tumblr or whatever. NEVER LET THEM CATCH YOU OFFGUARD.

5. THE DATE OF VOTING

5.1 VOTING TIME OFF

Go to this website: https://www.workplacefairness.org/voting-rights-time-off-work/

Or the state official website to check your right of missing work in election date.

States are a bitch and can be very different in multiple aspects, such as:

How many hours off you have to vote?

Is it paid time off?

Do you need advance notice required?

Do you need proof of voting when returning to work?

For example, Alabama gives you 1 hour of unpaid free time to go vote (unless you start working at least 2 hours after the polls open), you don’t need to show proof of voting,

Meanwhile, Arizona gives up to 3 hours of paid time off (unless employee has three consecutive hours available while polls are open at beginning or end of shift), must give a day in advance of notice.

Now, if for whatever reason you have no paid-time off or the time is not enough. Because lets be honest, there is going to be a line, you might have to sacrifice your pay to stay and vote. Especially if you don’t have access to the mail or early in person voting. It sucks, I know, but it is important to recognize that voting is important. This is why I made this guide, so you can plan ahead and figure out your rights and what will be the potential issues you might face.

5. 2 BE CAREFUL WITH WHAT YOU WEAR TO THE VOTING POLLS

Did you know that some states have rules where if you were anything that alludes to a certain candidate then you are kicked out of the fucking polls?

Any shirt, pants, accessory with a slogan, face, or maybe even color is not safe.

To be safe, I say just wear all black. Avoid red and blue colors, avoid slogans, avoid anything that makes you stand out because some states will do anything in their power to kick you out of the building.

5.3 IF THE VOTING POLLS CLOSE WHEN YOU ARE STILL IN LINE, DON’T LEAVE

You got in line, so it is your right to stay there until you vote. Stuck till 9 pm? Don’t care, stay there, they can’t kick you out. Don’t let anyone tell you that you missed your shot when you are right next to the goal.

Voting is a right, it is a necessary right in a democratic country. Sadly, voting is also a privilege in the US, where people have to be constantly vigil to make sure they can share their voice. It is important to understanding this and fight to make your voice heard.

Do not let officials silence you.

Do not let your job silence you.

Plan ahead and share your voice.

And if anyone tells you that voting is stupid, it won't amount to anything or that you are supporting a monster, block them.

Let them be stupid and waste their right away, because you know better. You know that if voting was stupid then politicians wouldn't be fighting to remove voters' rights and voices.

Let yourself be heard.

[yourgamemasterthewhiterabbit]

The great regular sleep experiment 2024 part uh... "pillow"

Okay, so what happened is the night before last I looked up everything I needed to go get my ID, and discovered that -technically- I didn't have anything that qualified as "proof of identity" because both my cards were expired and as a disabled person I can't qualify for a credit card, can't drive etc... In fact I can't even acquire something on the list. All the proof I have of who I am and where I live is technically only qualified as "proof of address", Having my passport -night- fix this, but my ex husband's father still has that.

So I decided that I'd show up with all I had, and if they were obtuse about it I would write angry letters exhaustively until there were policy changes. It's bad enough they make you get a new ID and health card every 2-5 years and that they make you pay for the photo ID. The applying online options would be great except you aren't allowed to the moment your card has actually already expired. I think there should be exceptions to a lot of these things for the disabled and especially for anyone on a disability pension.

I also decided that the best way to make sure I could get in and out as fast as possible was to get the earliest morning appointment I could and keep it, and I -could- book online so I did.

But then, it was my night sleeping shift, and even though I took sleeping pills and did everything I could... Not only could I not sleep at 10, but I couldn't sleep at 12, etc and so on until I had just laid in bed doing nothing until 5 ish am... At which point I had no choice but to get up because the walk there was going to take 1.5 hours min, and I had to eat and drink first, but also have time to pee after that had fully processed so I don't have to try to use a public toilet, etc... You know how a 9 am appointment means needing to be up at 4 when you're otherwise disabled and/or have autism/adhd...

So I fucking went to get my ID so sleep-zombied that I think everyone I encountered just assumed I was stoned AF, just absolutely wizard high at the government offices.

And I got my ID, but I hadn't brought my cane and I already could barely walk due to not sleeping, and kept tilting to the left because of trying to keep weight off of my right foot. I stopped at a dollar-store on the way home because it was right at opening and I needed to this week anyway to get the treats that make Pumpkin actually eat his food. Anyway point is I was walking way slower on the way back and the appointment was already at 9 am so I didn't get to bed until past 12.

And I slept! And then I was barely awake long enough to eat and went back to bed by 7 pm, and then I slept! On and off a lot until 6 am [I had moved my 5 am alarm later]...

And I am hoping I can sleep again in about 15 minutes, otherwise I am not going to recapture my 10-2 sleeps and my schedule will be soundly fucked up, all because I had to try to replace my ID.

[No I could not just take a cab or bus for the same reasons I never can without it being a near guarantee of being exposed to corona]

Oh yeah! The pillow! Turns out a shallow lumbar pillow for my lower back helps with my spine trying to be too straight all the time. The lower curve of my back and upper back have both been vanishing and my disks have been trying to curve out sideways because of it, and I have really shitty connective tissue, so I have been trying to keep my lower back curved the right way when I sleep so I don't develop an abnormal curve to my spine. For normal people this would be a process that takes years to cause problems and years to adjust back, or surgery, but my connective tissue is weak and stretchy and this kind of shit can happen to me and reverse int he span of a month. Unfortunately, correcting how bad my spine has gotten means an increase in the number of headaches I am getting again.

It also turns out that a lower back pillow that slips out of place is HORRIBLE for your back though, so ymmv.

So yeah, looking forward to my new ID photos looking utterly fucked... Which -frankly- is how I am going to look opening my door to buy alcohol or having to show up at a medical facility anyway.

That is, unless they pull the same shit as last time and send me my ID with the OLD photos because they can't see the age difference between them and think the older photo is better quality. They KEEP doing this, they insist I have to go in and take my mask off for a new photo [risk of corona and all], and then they just use the last one I took for them when I was still wearing makeup [more fem?]... Which is over 10 years old at this point, btw, it's just still on my last most recent ID because whoever is making the cards seems to prefer it. Like I don't care if I still look the same age, or younger with no makeup, I don't like having to show people an ID that looks like a 'modeling portfolio' pic and feels like misgendering. People already almost refuse to believe my ID is real because I look too young, I do not need them also thinking I don't look like the same person as in my photo because I don't look fem enough. I keep trying to take a more neutral looking photo and they keep opting out for me.

Whatever, they're telling me it's good for 5 years now.

[monisha1199]

Elevate Your Career With AWS: A In-depth Guide to Becoming an AWS Expert

In the fast-paced and ever-evolving realm of modern technology, proficiency in Amazon Web Services (AWS) has emerged as an invaluable asset, a passport to the boundless opportunities of the digital age. AWS, the colossal titan of cloud computing, offers an extensive array of services that have revolutionized the way businesses operate, innovate, and scale in today's interconnected world. However, mastering AWS is not a mere task; it is a journey that calls for a structured approach, hands-on experience, and access to a treasure trove of reputable learning resources.

Welcome to the world of AWS mastery, where innovation knows no bounds, where your skills become the catalyst for transformative change. Your journey begins now, as we set sail into the horizon of AWS excellence, ready to explore the limitless possibilities that await in the cloud.

Step 1: Setting Sail - Sign Up for AWS

Your AWS voyage begins with a simple yet crucial step - signing up for an AWS account. Fortunately, AWS offers the Free Tier, a generous offering that grants limited free access to many AWS services for the first 12 months. This enables you to explore AWS, experiment with its services, and learn without incurring costs.

Step 2: Unveiling the Map - Official AWS Documentation

Before you embark on your AWS adventure, it's essential to understand the lay of the land. AWS provides extensive documentation for all its services. This documentation is a treasure of knowledge, offering insights into each service, its use cases, and comprehensive guides on how to configure and utilize them. It's a valuable resource that is regularly updated to keep you informed about the latest developments.

Step 3: Guided Tours - Online Courses and Tutorials

While solo exploration is commendable, guided tours can significantly enhance your learning experience. Enroll in online courses and tutorials offered by reputable platforms such as Coursera, Udemy, ACTE, or AWS Training and Certification. These courses often include video lectures, hands-on labs, and quizzes to reinforce your understanding. Consider specialized AWS training programs like those offered by ACTE Technologies, where expert-led courses can take your AWS skills to the next level.

Step 4: Raising the Flag - AWS Certification

Achieving AWS certification is akin to hoisting your flag of expertise in the AWS realm. AWS offers a range of certifications that validate your proficiency in specific AWS areas, including Solutions Architect, Developer, SysOps Administrator, and more. Preparing for these certifications provides in-depth knowledge, and there are study guides and practice exams available to aid your preparation.

Step 5: Hands-on Deck - Practical Experience

In the world of AWS, knowledge is best acquired through hands-on experience. Create AWS accounts designated for practice purposes, set up virtual machines (EC2 instances), configure storage (S3), and experiment with various AWS services. Building real projects is an effective way to solidify your understanding and showcase your skills.

Step 6: Navigating the AWS Console and CLI

As you progress, it's essential to be fluent in navigating AWS. Familiarize yourself with the AWS Management Console, a web-based interface for managing AWS resources. Additionally, learn to wield the AWS Command Line Interface (CLI), a powerful tool for scripting and automating tasks, giving you the agility to manage AWS resources efficiently.

Step 7: Joining the Crew - Community Engagement

Learning is often more enriching when you're part of a community. Join AWS-related forums and communities, such as the AWS subreddit and AWS Developer Forums. Engaging with others who are on their own AWS learning journeys can help you get answers to your questions, share experiences, and gain valuable insights.

Step 8: Gathering Wisdom - Blogs and YouTube Channels

Stay updated with the latest trends and insights in the AWS ecosystem by following AWS blogs and YouTube channels. These platforms provide tutorials, case studies, and deep dives into AWS services. Don't miss out on AWS re:Invent sessions, available on YouTube, which offer in-depth explorations of AWS services and solutions.

Step 9: Real-World Adventures - Projects

Application of your AWS knowledge to practical projects is where your skills truly shine. Whether it's setting up a website, creating a scalable application, or orchestrating a complex migration to AWS, hands-on experience is invaluable. Real-world projects not only demonstrate your capabilities but also prepare you for the challenges you might encounter in a professional setting.

Step 10: Staying on Course - Continuous Learning

The AWS landscape is ever-evolving, with new services and features being introduced regularly. Stay informed by following AWS news, subscribing to newsletters, and attending AWS events and webinars. Continuous learning is the compass that keeps you on course in the dynamic world of AWS.

Step 11: Guiding Lights - Mentorship

If possible, seek out a mentor with AWS experience. Mentorship provides valuable guidance and insights as you learn. Learning from someone who has navigated the AWS waters can accelerate your progress and help you avoid common pitfalls.

Mastering AWS is not a destination; it's a continuous journey. As you gain proficiency, you can delve into advanced topics and specialize in areas that align with your career goals. The key to mastering AWS lies in a combination of self-study, hands-on practice, and access to reliable learning resources.

In conclusion, ACTE Technologies emerges as a trusted provider of IT training and certification programs, including specialized AWS training. Their expert-led courses and comprehensive curriculum make them an excellent choice for those looking to enhance their AWS skills. Whether you aim to propel your career or embark on a thrilling journey into the world of cloud computing, ACTE Technologies can be your steadfast partner on the path to AWS expertise.

AWS isn't just a skill; it's a transformative force in the world of technology. It's the catalyst for innovation, scalability, and boundless possibilities. So, set sail on your AWS journey, armed with knowledge, practice, and the determination to conquer the cloud. The world of AWS awaits your exploration.

[zolarwho]

5/9/2024

My life is gradually changing and expanding not just internally but externally. I took a sudden trip to Guanajuato, Mexico with my beloved Grandma of course. She’s been asking for awhile to go visit with her and this time I took the trip. I was more than ready to, all the cards allowed me to go. I already had gotten my passport, online school, seasonal job ect. Everything fell into place beautifully and that’s the BEAUTY when going with life’s flow when already with positive mindset/righteousness/discipline. It was like I was rewarded by life given this opportunity which has been delayed for awhile for me. I’ve always wanted to travel and see the world 🗺️✈️

I consider myself to be very spiritual and someone who is very focused on self growth + improvement. It motivates me and helps me see how FAR i’ve come as an individual.

As of now I really see myself winning in life. Before I did with just my mindset. I knew I was at peace and contentment with my current life. It was hard and it’s a journey but it’s worth it because I truly am winning and now people can see it. 3D—>4D wise

It’s my 2nd night here and already love it. I’m currently living on a ranch and we travel to get to places which I don’t mind. I love the sun (which I barely got in America) and I love moving my body. This is great because forced movement like exercise can be boring but going places makes me not even realize how much I’ve really walked.

Even though I’m a “no sabo” kid, I learn fast and am already a little fluent in Spanish, thanks to my Grandma who is the only one I can speak Spanish with. I plan to dedicate my journey here to more personal, emotional, physical and most of all, spiritual growth. I’m learning lots of new things everyday while living another perspective. As well as learning more Spanish everyday, that I can guarantee.

I’ve also had some caldo de res at a restaurant and got to experience a different way of life. I mean since i’ve been here, that’s been constant but even down to restaurant or food court. I got to sat down while they were making everything fresh right next to a large table where anyone can sit at different stands. I sat with my Grandma in front of 2 ladies and ate and chat with them.

SEE this is different, normally in America, everyone is usually closed off from each other. I am too a person who doesn’t really make an effort to socialize with people. I know Mexico 🇲🇽 is helping me open up to others more easily while learning and trying to vocalize my thoughts and feelings not just in general anymore but in a different language so another can just simply understand.

Life is free over here. More free and fun. Maybe it’s just how I view things as a person. Everyone has different life’s and perspectives so someone else can see Mexico as a shackle while I see it as a free, fun, social and limitless experience.

Today I also went grocery shopping with my Grandma and we bought lots of fruit. I’m very particular with my food and have noticed that I am kind of a clean “freak” so she thought it was best for us to buy fruit. I also got excited when I saw the abundant amount of honeycomb. This is NOT that common in America. People overcharge and it’s a uncommon delicacy. So it’s the little things that make me happy :3

Love life, life loves me. Life is great ect. All the positive things 💫

[maranzalla]

Top museum you want to visit vs top museum you've visited

oh boy

top museums you've visited

Uffizi, Florence: no holds barred, my favourite place in the world, on every plane except physical I am always here, I gleefully download the little picture of a random item they send each month with the newsletter, I drop my earnings in the bookshop with the faith and drive of a XV century burgess buying an indulgence for their soul, whatever bullshit the director pulls I will be there for it , and when the yearning hits you can take the virtual visit which is very well done

Museo Egizio, Torino: same as above but with more restraint, in the sense that I love it a lot but I am able to contain myself in the presence of it, mostly because i'm usually in Turin for work and I have yet to figure out if there's a way to go to the bookshop directly without going through the museum (sadly). I am always THIS close to buying a replica of a Bast statue in the online shop though. Also I watch their youtube channel and it's FULL of nice talks, docs, etc I'm in love with the director

Sforza Castle museums in Milan: overlooked by many but there's loads of nice things here, largest Egyptian collection in Italy after Turin, Leonardo, Michelangelo, Renaissance, Gothic... you name it, we have it, and the ticket is pretty cheap all things considering, plus you're in the castle itself which is great , makes all other castles seems quaint in comparison , i can almost feel the steely gaze of the Duke as he plays la pallacorda in the yard while the foreign ambassadors twiddle nervously

Museo della Scienza e della Tecnica, Milan: great times here were had as a kid. very interactive. used to be you could also visit a real submarine from WWI here, but I think they moved it to Genua (submarines need water)

Galata Museo del Mare / Italian Emigration Museum, Genua: putting these two bad bitches together because one is the offshoot of the other, but hear me dear reader: here you can visit a life-sized replica of a Genoese war galley from the XVI century and they'll have you at the oars. Most importantly, the emigration part, which deals with the Italian emigration from the XIX century onwards, should be required fucking reading for all schools and also most adults in the current era. It's a CYOA that has you escaping extreme poverty in rural Italy to find your luck abroad, but it's tough and merciless. They have you sign up for an ocean voyage to escape to America and the ship fucking capsizes with you on it, and by this I mean that (last time I was there) they put you in a little boat in the dark that they rock around and spray you with water, and unless you and your other fellow visitors row fast enough, the lifeboat sinks and you die. They have you show up at Ellis Island with a passport and you have to plead your case but you don't know English, in which case you get sent away, or perhaps earlier in the boat you caught TBC and they find out! They have the foreman in France dismiss your requests because Italians are fascist traitors and they didn't forget the 1941 invasion! 10/10, should be mandatory , makes you really think about what passed and is still passing in this world and how we are all leaves of the same garden . Some people should come here and think about how lucky they are

Beijing Tapwater Museum: senpai really insisted visiting this one while we were there, and ngl, it is Exactly What It Says: a museum on how they gave running water to Beijing, a great feat. I'm putting it here because getting there is a fucking odyssey (it's really on the outskirts of Beijing, which means it's really, really far away from places foreigners are usually seen) and we had to ask for directions and walk through a residential complex to get there, and once we did the staff member at the booth was so surprised they were almost going to let us in ticketless. also we were the only ones there so they had to light it all up for us

Beijing Crime Museum : a museum about crime and punishment since the Qing dynasty up to ... ? I want to say modern times but the whole idea of the musuem is that there's apparently no crime anymore (nice!) so it gets to about the first DNA tests on crime scenes. This effectively functions as a museum of the late Qing - early Republican era, which is my favourite period in modern Chinese history, and also it gets extra points because the bookshop is chock full of extravagant PCC merchandise. This is were I got my badge holder saying "I AM A GOOD COMRADE! WHATEVER THE PARTY ASKS, I WILL DO!" , which I wear in everyday company life as a private joke to myself

(not a museum! but) Memorial grave of Matteo Ricci, Beijing: this is the site of the first cemetery that allowed westerners to be buried in China as part of the emperor's favour, and this is where the very first such honoured westerner is buried. Matteo Ricci was an Italian missionary that in the XVII century lived his whole life in China, and had such a pivotal impact on the relations between Chinese and Italian / Western culture that we're still banking, as a country, on this guy's social credit nearly 400 years after the fact. His grave (with a couple of other Jesuits) now sits squarely at the centre of the Beijing Party School, and if you think about it, this means that the crop of the PCC studies and grows around him. This is not normally open to the public but as a recognition of his greatness, if you show up at the gates with an Italian passport they give you a little ticket and you can go visit. I'm putting it here because as a Chinese studies person, I love Ricci, and also because the experience of walking through the Party school with your little ticket and going to see the grave is pretty much as exclusive as they come

National Gallery and National Portrait Gallery, London: I think the National Gallery > the British Museums, it's a much friendlier place (British Museum is too big, swallows you whole), plus all the portraits make it seem like you're visiting friends. Also the bookshop there is 10+, and also the scones I had with @girlwholovesherwords

Museums I want to see:

i'll be honest: i'll go anywhere. I've been to the Shoes Museum in Vigevano, i don't care. But I'd say that unfortunately there's places that are really, really hard to get into: Syria, Iran, Iraq... those places are unfortunately destroyed or blocked, the loss is insustainable. Hell, I'd say going to the Russians museums is pretty harder these days too, so yeah

[cosmicblame]

Okay. Long catharsis post just so I can see what I put myself through

(Bonus, this is how you get a passport in the US fast)

Jan 17th- I submitted a passport renewal, paid for expedited processing (at the time was it was estimated at 3-5 weeks)

Feb 10th- check the (v shitty) online portal, and see my materials have just been received. Note somewhere on the website that processing went from 3-5 weeks and grew to 5-7 weeks. They start the clock the day they RECEIVE the materials.

(Flight is March 16th)

Feb 28th- get laid off

March 2nd- call passport hotline to ask what's up... gets through (A MIRACLE as I will learn on this journey). Told to call back tomorrow

March 3rd- call. A fucking uwu woman is all like "you're chill. You need your passport by the 10th because you need a visa?? No problem. It will be there. Seriously. No problems. None. What. So. Ever"

March 8th- the online portal is still working. Indicates "still in process". Takes about 10 calls to get through to an agent. I say "how am I supposed to receive the passport by the 10th if it hasn't shipped yet?" I get yelled at for being naive to believe they can just tell me when I'll get my passport and that's how the system works.

I have the option of an in person appointment March 9th at 10am.

... In Puerto Rico or Monday in Honolulu.

I see if I can make it happen. I can't. Because I gave no new income... and I have no new income because I filed for the half week I worked/was laid-off, and unemployment is now contesting whether I was actually laid off.

[March 9, 10, 13, & 14] I call passport people upwards of 20x a day. Sometimes, it is just broken. Sometimes they're too busy. Sometimes, they tell me there are no in-person appointments.

[During this time my SNAP and Medicaid benefits fall through the bureaucratic cracks of hell.

I stress make an entire outfit, teaching myself pleating for bishop sleeves. I look fly as fuck]

March 9th- portal breaks. Otherwise-known-as: exclusively for anyone who's documents were received the week my documents were received, it just says "NA gov't borked". Weirdly find out my passport is in Tucson. Which is weird because there is an office in Philly.

I freak out. Deep dive on the internet. Read on Reddit that they accept a VERY limited number of walk-ins. But you have to be first. So show up early.

March 10th- Show up in person 1.5 hours before opening (6:30) in 30 degree whether.

Meet a vet trying to go to Mexico to treat his PTSD with psilocybin and a lesbian who works at Home Depot. They are my saving grace.

THEY NO LONGER TAKE IN PERSON APPOINTMENTS. NO EXCEPTIONS.

Home depot lesbian tells us we can call our U.S. Rep.

Call immediately. Leave a message.

[Weekend break]

March 13th- don't hear anything from Rep. Decide to walk into Senator's office. Get yelled at again. I probably wasn't yelled at, but I still cried. You nerd an appointment (nobody picked up to schedule an appointment).

My saint of a best friend tells me I need to sign a waiver of privacy for these reps to act on my behalf. 30 minutes later I'm on the phone with a public worker/aide. THEY. GENUINELY. WANT. TO. HELP. THEY ARE THE BEST.

My Senator is new and the office required me to print the waiver for a "wet signature". Who has a printer? CVS. Go to CVS ten minutes before closing.

As an aside: All "rush" companies cannot help you if you have an application in. They are stupidly expensive. Scam.

Well, I reached out to them because the Passport Agency used to have an online system and these companies used bots to take the appointment and sell them. I tried to buy an appointment. Nada.

Portal still broken so I can't tell when my passport might be ready so I could adjust flights so that I don't abandon my best friend who isn't comfortable traveling alone as a woman.

March 14th- Senator aide calls to tells me my application has been delayed because I wanted an X as my gender marker. He can get me an appointment as long as I push my travel back a day. I buy a last-minute flight to show immenent travel plans proof <- a requirement to walk into passport office.

Flights within 3 days of travel are not cheap.

After the phone call I cancel the flight because it was expensive as shit, within 24 hours of booking (P.S. insurance that allows you to cancel at any point... only allow you to cancel if you're sick. Not just for fun and games), and the passport appointment is same day as the original flight I bought when I had a job. So I am calculating timewise if I can get the passport and still get to NYC to still catch my original flight.

I get a WILDLY cheap train ticket that leaves 5 hours later... at midnight.

March 15th- midnight 2 hour train to New York City. 5 hour "layover/connection". Decide to stay at my best friends. Construction on the subway means it takes an hour and a half to get to her. I sleep for an hour and a half and get on the hour and half subway back to the train station. 8 hour train ride through Western NY (snowy. Was not planning for that, shoes and socks got soaked through).

On the train, U.S. Rep aide calls says "even though your passport application was denied because not all federal facilities can give you an X as a gender indicator, I got them to print it with what it was on your original passport. It's printed and shipping... sir"

Me: 👀, I'm on a train to Buffalo, I called and told your office yesterday.

Him: keep the appointment

Stay on the train. Found out the ticket was so cheap because it was not technically all the way to Buffalo. Just some rinkadink station outside of Buffalo. Have to Uber into town.

Airbnb a room in a lady's house. The cats and dog were my saving grace.

March 16th (day of flight)- POWER walk to passport agency. Listening to strut songs. Realize I'm going to make this work.... then realize I need a visa to enter and that takes time (website says 4 days) to process. But you need a pic of your passport so I couldn't have started it earlier).

Wait for passport printing. Walking around freezing downtown. Random delivery guy tells me I walk fast because he saw me going the other way an hour earlier. I pull charm out of somewhere. Get complimented on my ass. "Thanks I grew it myself"

Literally just wander around aimlessly. Eavesdrop on someone coming out as nb and starting estrogen; I am stressed, I am fragile, I start WEEPING in public.

Go to passport office- "you have two passports. One is void. Good luck. P.S. Sir, hey the gender marker thing is weird, huh? You can reapply in a year, free of charge and get it fixed" Immediately apply for visa. Pay too much out or pocket for 24 hour processing. It needs to be physically printed once its issued. Scheming how to print it during our layover in London.

Get notification that the shipped passport has been delivered back home.

Share an Uber to the airport with someone else who got their passport (thank you so much).

Learn that my sister needed her visa checked to go through security in US. Start stressing.

2 hour flight to NYC.

Arrive in the same terminal as my flight to London and realize I don't need to show TSA my visa.

Try to get my ticket after checking in online. Can't. Go to desk. Explain the entire situation. "Sir, I know it's not your fault. We get charged a fee if you try and enter a country without a visa. Cannot be done. Unless you break up your tickets and get charged current day market rates flights and hope you get your visa during your layover but you're essentially getting charged double for this flight at same day prices.

If you get it tomorrow, you can come back and try again."

In my best friend's arms: My best friend flies. I cries.

Take the one and a half hour subway back to her place. Google to take a bus. No bus shows up. Twice. It's midnight. I've had a handful of almonds for dinner. I cry. Get on the wrong subway. Get on the right subway.

She has cleared out her food because of this travel. I fall asleep exhausted. Wake up every hour to see if visa came through.

It doesn't. Walk to CVSs to see if they have printing. They don't. Trying to figure out what to do. Visa comes through. Take a discounted lyft to FedEx. Print. Walk to subway. To commuter train. To airway train.

Go to check in desk. And since I'm tired of coming out and getting dirty looks I just say "I missed my flight". The check-in clerk says the fees to change my flight will be $700

I cry. I explain why I couldn't apply for my visa because a federal agency doesn't have consistency and does not tell you that some of them just can't offer gender affirmation even though it's on the form. This clerk works some magic and the fees are waived.

I have to wait 10 hours until my 17 hour flight.

This better be the only fucking time this cousin gets married.

The amount of trains, planes, and automobiles I've taken. The lack of good consistent sleep. The amount of coming out I've done. The truly lack of awareness of what that means (and/or the cruel intention of not abiding by it). The amount of faith that I can navigate and figure out my public insurance, food supplement, and unemployment... is terrifying. I'll be fucked otherwise.

I'm so tired. I stink. I'm gutted. I've been traveling for 48 hours before my actual travel. A lot of hurry up and wait.

Not to mention, in pursuing this full time (seriously I had to be on hold for 16 hours in the last two weeks)... I'm behind on packing up my house because I need to vacate my house and be without a place to live again.

The loneliness is most profound in these moments. I'm so so so fucking grateful for my self-reliance. I know it's something I need to break. But I wouldn't have been able to do this. I'm impressive. And? It's not sustainable. I was not built for this. I ache.

I find myself passing the endless hours just reliving being abandoned in the middle of the night. The benign neglect I was raised in.

That hug my best friend gave me? Only thing got me through.

"Sir" topples me. Any semblance of me having hope and believing I could get through this gets shafted when someone calls me sir. The he/hims is not great. But something about sir.

And I just get swept back up on my ex willfully misgendering me as some spectacle for her queer journey. After years and years of berating me about it.

But I have learned there are people out there who really do want to help. They're great. To anyone reading this for passport info: learn charm. I cannot emphasize this enough. It's fucked up. But it's vital.

I think the genre I'm living in is still some bitter sweet indie. I would love to say this is some comedy, but it's unreasonable to assume we know what genre we're living in.

Anyways. The last thing I learned is that I'm ready for the Amazing Race and I'm going to win.

Also I'll be out of the country. Tag me in the gold stuff

My queue said it was 12 posts but that was a lie. I have it set up for y'all. You're good.

[kscriba]

Harriet didn't have time to protest much more, scrambling to repack the one suitcase she had unpacked and helping her dad find his passport, which ended up being in the fridge. Jasper waves them off, promising to phone Harriet when her agent calls with the date of the screentest, and thanks to a combination of money, connections, and a suspicious looking badge that Spencer flashes at various airline workers, Harriet can barely consider the prospect of the journey ahead before she's fast asleep in her business-class seat.

They land late in the evening, Japan time, and spend the evening in a nearby capsule hotel. In the morning, they take a high-speed train to Mount Komorebi, Spencer impressing Jayce and Harriet with their fluent Japanese, no doubt learned during one of their many acting gigs. Or for fun, it's hard to tell with Spencer.

When the trio finally arrive at the ryokan, Harriet remembers that she never phoned Tyrone after her audition. He comes barreling out of the ryokan, dressed in a yukata and fresh from the bathhouse. "I thought that was you!" He wraps Harriet in a tight hug while her parents are still occupied with checking in. "How did it go? And if I can ask, why are your parents here?"

Harriet smiles, pulling Ty around the corner to bury her face in his chest. "It's so good to see you after such a long flight. It went well—they said that the screentest is next week, though. So my parents are joining me until I have to go back."

"Oh, that's great news, Hattie. Too bad about the timing, but that's great!" He sneaks a kiss before stepping away. "Hi, Spencer. Would you like me to put your luggage away?"

"Don't worry, Ty. You're only paid to be my employee at the restaurant. Unless you're just trying to butter me up?"

Jayce glances warily at Tyrone. Unlike Spencer, he actually pays attention to Harper's online scandals, and watched the video she released. "If you really wanted to butter her up, Tyrone, you can open your yukata all the way."

Harriet groans. Suddenly her romantic get-away has turned into a family vacation.