#genuinely curious bc like. not a lot of people talk about it or just lowkey don’t like it 💀💀

[katsmtmsdoodles]

in-universe explanation under the cut 😘

Lloyd:

- On the news CONSTANTLY

- Whenever the ninja are talked about, it's Lloyd's picture thrown up there

- He does all of the official public speaking for the team, so of course

- He's notoriously the sweetest to his fans

- Compilations of him being the nicest person ever are all over YouTube

- He doesn't ever post anything on Instagram, but he has the most followers anyway

- Isn't and doesn't want to be verified on TikTok, he's just a scroller, but trying to find his account has become a huge internet conspiracy

Kai:

- Posts on TikTok & Chirp DAILY, he has huge followings everywhere

- Everything from charities to his work out routines to Q&As to thirst traps

- Even has some vulnerable inspirational videos that are like "keep going. you'll be okay, i believe in you" that are honestly tear-jerkers

- Interacts with fans the most

- If anyone is curious about what the ninja have been up to, Kai's pages are the place to go

- Also attends the most events bc he's an attention whore

- But has also raised the most money and attention for said charities as a result

Jay:

- He doesn't host Ultimate Ninja Warrior anymore, but it kept going with his permission and a contract, he visits as a special host during the finals every year

- He's also on the logo of the show lol

- Occasionally posts stuff on Chirp when it means a lot to him

- He's bad at ignoring haters tho so not online as much as Kai

- At the same time, he gets really emotional when fans tell him how he's inspired them

- He's the funniest at interviews and really likes doing them with the other ninja

- His compilations are either "the blue ninja being HILARIOUS" or "the blue ninja secretly being a genius for 10 minutes"

Nya:

- She's only on social media to bother Kai during his livestreams and talk shit on his posts. also gives Jay's haters nasty comments

- But she does have a few workout tip videos to empower girls who look up to her

- Everyone has a crush on her

- Does volunteer work for publicity to the organization

- She's lowkey aggressive on her social media though, like, half of her posts are going after terfs and nazis to get them canceled

- The ninja's social team has a heart attack every time they hear that she posted something lmao

Zane

- The most Memed Ninja, like it's ridiculous

- He's every reaction image

- You know how supernatural has a gif for everything? There's a Zane gif for everything thanks to his interviews, media, fan events, etc

- His fan base is AGGRESSIVE for some reason, though

- His fan base is the K-Pop fans of the ninjago world, even though there's not as many of them.

- Maybe that IS why though. The few. The strong. They're the ones who, like, solve crimes through the internet and shit

- There are compilations of "every time the white ninja remembers he's a robot" that's just Zane, like, being shook when fridge magnets stick to him and when metal detectors go off around him

Cole:

- He has zero internet presence

- A whole ass mystery

- There are conspiracy theories that he's not even real and its a running gag

- There are accounts dedicated to posting blurry pictures of him like he's a cryptid

- They were clear pictures before, but they were edited to be blurry lmao cause it's a joke but some people have genuinely began to wonder

- Like some of them will literally be a blurred picture of him sitting with everyone else at an interview

- Cole isn't in on the joke though and is confused every time people meme at him (he's not an internet kid TuT)

[lggy]

I’m on both and every time I go back over to aphtwt it’s like that guy with pizzas going into a room on fire

its a long ass story thats been going on since the reveal of s7. here's just a recount of what's been going on lately for anyone curious i guess. its just to answer why a lot of people are icked out by laurance right now and why people are saying "i cant enjoy laurance anymore"

bascially laurance's va doesn't know how to properly manage his image,

ive been following him long before, he would have a few old tweets and tiktoks where he gets really annoyed towards aphmau fans, and reasonably so

...after the reveal of s7, he tried coming back to make his brand Laurance except he's using his NFSW bdsm account. after people started trying to link his nsfw links to his aphwiki page i made a twt post asking people to stop doing that. thats when we realized seb is obsessed with searching himself up on twitter and he proceeded to QRT me and make a few response posts reiterating what i said and apologizing for interacting with minors on his nsfw account. he made a new alt account for interacting with fans on aphtwt.

that was back around september-october

he searches himself and laurance up constantly to QRT and pick fights and stuff. its clear he's going through mental shit - he talks about it a lot. but it took him months to realize hes not fit to be running an account to host his image/brand that he wants to be about Laurance. he picks up on any drama around himself and kinda has a villain speech every time someone doesnt like him. im kind of starting to feel bad for him.

this is all while lowkey begging Jess to contact him again to bring him back for VA work, cryptically referring to her sometimes as "The Creator". I forgot to mention he had this whole "Guys im having a huge reveal, Im coming back to VAing for a very special charater.." thing. me and a lot of people picked up on him being kind of.. fake? basically, he shit on aphmau before, equated VA work to a MLM, then had a total sudden switch-up as soon as s7 was announced and realized he can renew his role. he had a video saying he wants this job to get a new tattoo.

^ 'What's wrong with wanting money?' the thing is being a VA means you need to have a good image and thats usually generated by having a good fanbase. all that really said was that he's just hopping on a bandwagon to get paid and thus his fan interactions just came across as desperate and bait-y and fake as hell. think about how other VA's interact w their fans then compare it to this,

what happened yesterday was that garroth's VA announced he was doing a mystreet rewatch with much of the og cast!... then sebastian QRT'd with this

someone even asked if he can join them too

then he joined the discord. then got banned after 10 minutes.. then crashed out about it on twitter, posting that garroth's va blocked him. not posting the massive paragraph he had because its kinda the sameburger poetry. i genuinely have no idea why he would post this than to like, try to get people to turn on garroth's VA. severely inappropriate behavior for someone trying to come back to being a VA

allegedly, seb had livestreamed a while ago where he said something along the lines of, (quoting from oomf's memory) "I don't recommend you contacting or asking any of the old VAs about me, I don't know if they still think about me the same bc of how I was back then. Bipolar Disorder was really bad for me back then, it made me so edgy." and how other VAs had issues with him and tension. - i dont have a source for this but it lines up with this tweet :

where he very inappropriately and for no reason mentioned he had issues with another VA. the problem is he had NO reason to bring that up and had the situation he was referring to was about gene having a fill-in on a cocomau video and nothing to do with seb himself or any drama or anything.

aaand i think thats all. that's the laurance downfall crashout chronicles , i didnt want to get too detailed but i can ask questions and whatever

personally, i nevr really beleived this guy would ever get hired again. all because he uses his real/brand name for his porno stuff. the company does background checks yknow

[akgaereporter]

꩜ briizes: seunghan/wonbin/taro main dancer discourse 🤕

tldr: an ot7 account made a big thread on why seunghan is vital to riize's lineup, talents and visuals wise. they explain why his dancing is needed to balance the team but some taro/wonbin stans took it as shade towards their biases dance skills and ended up seeming lowkey ot6..

so everything started with this ot7 user posting a thread in korean about how seunghan is vital and unreplaceable within riize. they mentioned things like how his visuals and proportions blend the group properly, how he’s the mood maker and has good sense in variety and comedy contents, etc. very well written thread btw, here’s the link to read it if u havent already !

anyways, the issue started bc of the part where nomad talked about seunghan’s dance position within riize. they praised him for his flexible movements in contrast to shotaro and wonbin’s “rough street dancing and standard styles.” they also said that after watching the member’s fancams, seunghan is the member best at “using his upper body” and “highlighting the details of the choreography.”

here is the whole translated paragraph transcribed from the ss:

“Additionally, in order to widen the range of performance types that a group can handle, it is best if the specialized styles of each dance member do not overlap too much. While Shotaro and Wonbin's characteristics are rough street dancing and standard styles, respectively, Seunghan's style, in contrast, is very flexible and allows him to control the strength and weakness well. Also, by analyzing the members' fancams, we can conclude that the member in Rise who uses his upper body the best is Seunghan, and more importantly, Seunghan is the member who is the best at highlighting the details of the choreography among the members. In this way, the three dance line members are already the best combination, complementing each other's shortcomings, so if even one of them is missing, the quality of the performance will inevitably decline.”

this thread sparked a lot of seunghan praise:

now idk abt yall but after reading all these, the first thing on my mind isnt “ok but what about x member..”. this is clearly about seunghan, how he affects the performance/stage/vocal dynamic of the group, and what they lose without him. this is for seunghan and about seunghan, RELATIVE to the other members, not comparative. but some people clearly have other things in mind..

things got kinda messy from here🤕

and some people just straight up revealed they dgaf about him fr☠️

and youll never guess whats in shawty's bio..??

like hmm?? if 2+2 is 4.. how can you support an ot7 riize if you think he doesn't bring anything to the group? that hes not vital in anything? that they're doing fine w/o him? like im genuinely curious but anyways..

some people clocked how weird these reactions were but the damage has lwk already been done bc this is such a strange discourse to have at all🤕

☆ my opinion

again i just think its crazy how u can call urself ot7 when u dont believe he’s indispensable to the group? the whole point of nomad’s thread was to showcase what seunghan brought to riize, and why this ot6 body isn’t bringing out their full potential as vocal&performance artists. there are so many things to take into account here:

because one member is good at a certain aspect of a skill doesn’t make another members’ any less than..

the thread was to show seunghan’s unique differences from any other member, and highlight what the group loses by not having him. not to say “hes better at x than y member,” but to say “this is how seungan’s skill contrasts any other member and creates a better result.”

riize is a team, teams have members, members are going to have distinct styles that they execute best. shotaro is obviously the main dancer as he's very versatile and can cover a wide range of movement, but that doesn't change the fact there are details & aspects of seunghan’s dancing that he makes most noticeable, & that differ and contrast shotaro’s in a good way. those differences make them look better as a group. like yes taro is a pro dancer, but he has a more "x" style while seunghan accentuates more "y" movements, and "x" and "y" work together perfectly with the rest of the members on stage. its not about who is better, it’s about how they look together as one.

i feel like some taro/wonbin stans are referring to individual skills, which explains why they're bringing up taro's past as a dancer. individual skill is a whole different story, and again, that wasn't the purpose of the thread, it was to show what riize loses as a group by not having seunghan.

the “better at moving his upper body” part is one of those details seunghan highlights, but that comment is an opinion on nomad’s part, so ofc u can disagree with it. however the undeniable fact is that seunghan is very talented at dancing with his upper body, and whether x member is better than him or not isnt the point - it was included to show how he and only he executes it differently than others to create an enhanced look on stage. i think its funny how theres literally a part of the thread where wonbin is agreeing that seunghan has the most flexible upper body in an interview but some milkteas were still acting like nomad saying that is a snub to taro??😭

getting mad at a seunghan praise tweet for praising seunghan is odd behavior. u can of course have preferences, but to call it “discrediting” shotaro is a huge stretch. no one is downplaying shotaro’s skills as a dancer, in fact nomad’s thread is one of the only threads ive seen actually articulating and placing focus on seunghan’s dancing, so to say it was “objectively untrue” is crazy and i think we should just let hongjjangus have nice things. if u disagree, and think taro is better at something, gone ahead and make ur own thread like this user did (maybe with a less shady caption🤕) instead of creating a space for people to feel comfortable demeaning seunghan's skills comparatively to other members.

like who was speaking on him??😭😭 some people have definitely lost the plot but at least its a minority.. unrelated to these screenshots but theres srsly an epidemic of briizes who are lowkey moving ot6 but claiming its in the name of supporting riize's active members so be careful who u call oomf & stay strapped in these streets😕🙏🏽 seunghan WILL be home soon trust me ladies.. im psychic

[c l o s e t a b ?] ◀ ⇨ akgaepop.com

[brakingpoint]

i love it when you get sustantiatedly bitchy about things that don't really matter like ships, so i'd love you to talk about some of the ones you feel most strongly about, but tbh now i am also curious what you DO see

strongly tempted to put "i love it when you get substantiatedly bitchy about things that don't really matter" in my bio 👍🏻

anyway i feel like most of my examples are honestly not down to anything wrong with that particular ship but moreso overall trends in f1blr shipping (and i think i have set forward this exact thesis before so apologies for repeating myself but i love getting bitchy as much as you love to read it so i will yap about it again 😁) so it's probably more productive for me to just moan about those. perhaps with examples. just to swing the bat at the hornets' nest a little bit harder

in my opinion all of these trends are also interconnected - although they may at first seem contradictory - and feed into and amplify each other's respective flaws to create one big mess of mediocre shipping

trend one: trying to make fetch (yaoi) happen for every combo of teammates, rivals, drivers who came up through feeder series together regardless of if there is any chemistry or even anything remotely interesting about the dynamic

trend two: when there is no chemistry or canonically compelling feature to a certain combo, instead of doing the tried and true crackship method of getting a bit silly with it and going "hey would this be fucked up/funny/sexy/cute or what" everythingggg has to be about overwrought tinhat soulmateism, which is what makes trend one so exhausting. you can't be telling me you actually think every single teammate combo on the grid are actually star crossed lovers with abundant genuine and compelling yaoi fodder. it's not possible

trend three: everyone on here has the attention span and object permanence of a six month old cocomelon addict and so instead of respecting and sticking to the genuinely fantastic "vintage" (read: they were teammates/friends 2-5 years ago and don't interact as much publicly anymore) ships that exist for several drivers the overwhelming trend is for people to flock to the next big thing (read: whatever two drivers are standing next to each other for this season). it's kind of like migratory slash fandom but it's even weirder because it's happening all within one fandom, and half the time you're abandoning a genuinely good fun interesting ship for something that fits trends one & two and is therefore, to me, a bit shit

anyway examples of ships i just don't really Get for one or more of the above reasons include: a lot of contemporary lando ships (i'm not actually saying this because i'm a lando hater on track. when it comes to yaoi i do not discriminate and i think carlando is an all time banger f1 rpf staple. which is why i'm baffled by so many people acting like landoscar is anywhere near a worthy replacement); certain other teammate ships like britcedes, alex/logan (🕊️), zhou/bottas; even (please don't kill me) lestappen to an extent which i don't mind and have even written multiple fics for but i think people are taylor swift easter egging it a bit too hard at this point

on the other hand some of the ships i DO still like and Get include: strollonso (genuinely top ship to me at this point, peak contemporary teammate ship), piarles (idk if this has fallen victim to the Vintage Ship issue as much as i think or if i just perceive it that way bc half the pierre blogs on here have me blocked), some maxiel (lowkey prefer it when treated as a Vintage Ship as opposed to trying very hard to prove it's still alive and kicking today), carlando as already mentioned, whatever was going on between lando and max fewtrell and their possibly shared girlfriend a couple of years back, charlos (another strong contemporary teammate ship), sebmark, and of course my beautiful iconic eternal brocedes. OH and max/gp 😜

[novemberdevils]

Intermission time!! And we are back to my weekly scheduled yabbing session!!

Carlos in media session is my favourite to stare at because he usually looks like he is somewhere we can never reach and only he knows how to get there, It makes him wonder if Carlos ever resents him, especially when he comes out on top. I genuinely had a three hour long conversation with a friend of mine over this because like come on we think Charles is the one to get us back to glory so that might feels off for carlos so kudos for mentioning it because I feel people dont think about that a lot, “Will you be racing for the win on Sunday?” No he will be racing to dnf.

Ah jack doomscrolling my beloved, george always look like he is going to cry is my favourite thing during the weekend it’s always fun to watch, but merc is shit so I dont blame because Ferrari always makes me want to cry so I get it, “You know Hischier keeps throwing your name around?” Because he is in looovveee, jack is more oblivious than me and thats saying something because there was this man who was flirting with me and buying me coffee and getting me sandwich but I thought he was just being friendly until my bestie sat me down and was like how stupid are you.

@/hugheswdc is getting bullied so jack better win so they can laugh at everyone who doubted their words -can you post the headcanon about everyone? Because im getting attached to characters who dont even exist-.

Okay second period has started so we will wait unitl the second intermission to continue the yabbing session!.

Second intermission time!! 

And now we truly start the season because the first quali has arrived! And my stress has started, JACK WITH A 1:15.977 THATS MY BOY!!!! And Ferrari 1-3 start get it boys!! “Great job, Hughes.” Everyone stay calm we have our first nico compliment to jack’s face, jack is just like me because Melbourne is also one of my favourite tracks we get each other, I need to know when does nico decide to use jack or hughes when he talks about him, but nico saying that jack is too fast he might not catch him!! Boy dont make me scream into my pillow because this is not a normal thing to say about a rival.

I want McLaren to lose sorry Jamie love you but my hatred for McLaren is stronger so I dont want to see them top 10, jack your praise kink is known because you are happy when you make the team proud, jack having more poles than nico excuse me while I go and scream about this!! It’s the ONLY thing that jack wins over nico-do you have their stat? I will be curious to read it if you post them-, nico calling jack a “force”??? My guy calm down with the compliments no need to embarrass yourself.

Okay the third period has started so this will be the end of my yabbing session for the day I hope you enjoy my commentary!

yeah i am always writing that carlos looks dead to the world because That Is What He Looks Like. and doing his weird mouth thing. casually unhinges jaw. but yeah rip carlos i know Real Life says he is in the fuckass williams for the 2025 season but this is my fanfiction and i think writing him as jack's teammate is fun. they're always lowkey beefing. for a multitude of reasons. and then i get to write annoying twitter users with carlos pfps. oops

it is Vaguely implied to me in my brain that most of the tweets and articles and stuff shown are things that jack reads. maybe not all of them. but like. he does the doomscrolling. in my heacanon (it is my fic so ig it could just be canon) he has a burner f1twt account lmao but that's not super important. he doesn't tweet on it he just doesn't want to get caught accidentally liking something on main bc that would be a whole thing. bro probably doesn't even run his own twitter account. and yeah jack and nico are both different breeds of crazy. stop talking about each other to the media. Freaks

hugheswdc is i believe the most frequent twitter user i make tweets for. she has like. 50 or something on my doc i think? idk frequent flyer but she is one of jack's biggest and most vocal fans so it is consistently relevant. also she Will fight the annoying carlos fans (jase smoothoperationnn my beloathed). and icr what tweets exactly i've posted as of yet but she totally ships jack and nico. i've posted the one that gets qrted to hell right... anyways there is rpf within my rpf. lex hugheswdc is rpfing

other things that come to mind as far as Fictional Twitter Users go is cam hughessainz does not like nico but they know better than to say anything too obvious about it. jase hates jack but we all knew that. a lot of the users i write as mercedes fans are not big on nico or jack either -- they're always mad that they're being assholes (and then extra mad that jack's fans in particular seem to Enjoy him being an asshole instead of criticizing it). the uh rbrhughes user who i don't think has a real name (sexiest title contender?) wants jack to move to red bull (hence the username) but that is a Fool's Delusion. despite his ass being not very slick in red bull territory... idiot. if you ask lex it is because he is Gay (true)

oh and the arrow zegras bitch whose @ escapes me is more of an indycar than an f1 fan and root for mclaren by the proxy of that's their favorite indy team and jack by the proxy of being friends with zegras. countdown to the month of may commences

nico and jack cannot have a normal rivalry they are just gay. i cannot resist jack hughes praise kink... i once again almost just referenced a line from a scene I HAVE NOT POSTED YET. just trust me. dude has lost his mind. and unfortunately for everybody nico has figured out The Formula and is also being crazy. i love writing fics where both halves of the ship are just crazy

[chryblossomjjk]

omg kiki!!! this is like mad random but I need ur help. I remember u posted ab ur hair journey and I’m rlly curious ab what u did to help it!!! I’m malaysian and I grew up with THICK and voluminous hair but since I started wearing a hijab like six yrs ago my hair starting thinning bc I stopped taking care of it 😞 do u have any tips or recs to help ??? I’m lowkey starting to lose my confidence (even tho nobody can see my hair rlly lmfaooo) and I miss having a lot of hair lol. ofc only share if ur comfy!!! I just rlly appreciated you for sharing ur story w us!!!

p.s I literally luv u sm, ur work is amazing and all around u just seem like such a lovely person ok bye thx ILY <3 🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼

omg hi friend! i completely get how you feel. hair is such a huge part of your identity and losing it is genuinely traumatic! im so sorry you’re dealing with this! i can definitely share what ive done but pls know that im not like a health professional or anything and all of this is anecdotal! 💗

so one of the reasons i lost a lot of hair was bc i have pcos. i started taking medicine which im sure has contributed to the regrowth. but it doesn’t sound like yours is hormonal so i think probably the other methods could work well for you!!

1. i started taking biotin 10000 mcg (this was not prescribed, i just got the supplement from amazon. ik its just a supplement but pls be careful n take all of my advice with a grain of salt ily 🥺)

2. i only wash my hair about once a week, which really helped with breakage. i have v thick coarse hair, like you, and washing it too frequently definitely leads to dryness and breakage. thas no no >:( i also don’t really brush it that often, but that’s partially bc i have type 3 hair and brushing it out makes me look like i got electrocuted lol. but either way, being v careful when u brush, like starting bottom to top, can also help w breakage!

3. before i wash it, i massage mielle rosemary mint hair oil all over my scalp and let it sit for three hours. rosemary is a dht blocker and helps with the circulation in ur scalp and stuff.

4. when i wash my hair, i use one of these lil things w my shampoo bc it also increases the circulation

5. every night i use a few drops of the ordinary hair serum on the areas where i lost the most like my temple area

i know a lot of people have had success with rogaine aswell. i havent tried it bc it could possibly make another symptom of pcos worse, but ive heard a lot of great things about it! could be worth looking into!

also diet is a huge one too.without going into too much detail, my diet also really contributed to hair loss. so eating enough is a big one and ik protein and healthy fats helps you grow stronger hair, so maybe trying to incorporate more of those could possibly help!! wishing you the best of luck! feel free to reach out to me if you ever want to talk more about it! i know how heartbreaking it is so im here if you need anything 💗

[torialefay]

hi bubs! <3 for your ask game, lemme drop 🙃, 🌿 and 🐰 x

ahhhhh i've had this typed out for days and i just found it in my drafts?? 😭

hello bebe 🫶🏼 omg these are so hard!!!

🙃 weird fact i know: koalas are indubitably the most insufferable animals on the planet (i'm sorry australia u have so many amazing things but pls stop promoting these decrepit little creatures. ur better than that.) they literally only eat 1 type of leaf & it has no nutritional value & literally if the leaf isnt on the tree, they don't even recognize it. like they will just starve and not eat it. SPEAKING OF STARVING, the leaves are also lowkey kinda toxic & erode their teeth to the point that they just dont have teeth anymore & STARVE TO DEATH BC THEY WONT EVEN TRY ANOTHER FOOD. and then like when the baby koalas are born, once they have to learn how to digest the leaves (bc they dont have the enzymes) they literally EAT THEIR MOM'S SHIT (LICK HER ASSHOLE AS SHE'S SHITTING) to get some of the enzymes they need to eat their precious little disgusting eucalyptus leaves. i could go on and on ab other things but i think i will stop there i'm sorry.

hehe time to be normal again and pretend like i didn't just get entirely too heated and spiteful for no reason 🥰

🌿 favorite outfit: honestly idk if i have one :( all i know is i always am wearing a shit ton of jewelry & i overall have a more girly style. so like a lot of pinks & creme colors, but also black sometimes. gotta incorporate those witchy elements sometimes. and idk i like girly shoes??? i genuinely have no clue, i wear whatever is cute at the time ig 😭 but i am a big proponent of loving to do hair & makeup & i feel like that can make me look better in any outfit so 😂

🐰 what says the most about a person: i will 100% ALWAYS stick by this- the way that they talk about others. if they want to gossip constantly or even make tiny little jabs at people/ab their appearance, etc etc... yeah it's a no from me dog. && also i guess look at who they surround themselves with. if they're constantly in "drama" or someone's always "out to get them/their friends" or whatever, i will avoid at all costs 😭😂

please give me your answers too bc i'm so curious 🤭

[funky-sea-cryptid]

So I was reading your fic and just finished the second chapter😈

Look, I’m not into villains but uhhh Lucius’s attitude got me 😳😳 obviously fuck him🔪🔪 but but yk😳👉👈

Zenon and Asta’s brief interaction was lowkey cute because Zenon was thinking abt Allen at the moment🥹 Vanica and Noelle interaction gave me the ick never liked Vanica and that scene made me dislike her even more💀

Finral and Vanessa are the cutest and Dante throwing a tantrum is so on brand. I liked how y’all showcased the family dynamics when Dante was pretending he’s Wreck it Ralph while Lucius interrogated Magna.

I cant wait to see the religious themes in the fic going forward! Im not all that religious but canon BC has a lot of casual religious motifs and inspiration and my fic has a big focus on them too. I already see a chapter titled Genesis 6:2 and I’m excited😫😫

Quick question before I begin chapter 3, is Julius non-existent in this fic? (I’m genuinely curious I’m not actually asking as a simp💀)I’m assuming so bc he’s not in the character tags but I was wondering if he’s going to be a plot point in the future but if not, that’s fine too😈

HIIIIII OMG HI HELLO.

ahukdhud he's. it's unfortunate he's the only fucking one with an actual ability to manipulate people :,)

and yeah that was the idea! zenon's sitting there just tryin to drink and then allen 2.0 walks up like 8) fear.jpeg

THEY ARE THANK YOU lets go lesbians. and the family dynamics in the zogratis household was done by the amazing @the-florian-triangle they're so good with that kind of stuff (they're so good at writing im so lucky to know them fr). ALSO WRECK IT RALPH PLEEEEASE

oh yeah me and alex went fucking HAM with the religious stuff. it was a combination of greek mythos and the bible. either way it was a lot of fun lol. genesis 6:2 was the one we got the most brainworms about bc it's Elf Lore!!! we love the elves on this here tumblr <3

as for julius? all i'll tell you is that he very much exists ;) i can't tell you much more than that bc a lot of his part is something not even on ao3 yet but he's real!

feel free to talk to us about the fic as you continue and please enjoy :D!!!

[1plus1kiyoomi]

Chapter 7: Green Light

[prev] [next]

[masterlist]

note: i don’t know why i can’t edit chapter 6 so hopefully you reach this chapter

2 weeks.

2 weeks have passed ever since that night Yuta walked you home, the same night that you and Kuroo got into the biggest fight you’ve ever had. The doors were slammed, the remote of the TV flew from one wall to another, your voices were on top of your lungs.

Kuroo threw words he shouldn’t have, like accusing you of cheating on him. You even went on your knees just to prove to him that you didn’t. Apology after apology. You didn’t even know why you were asking for forgiveness when you did nothing wrong. He told you to leave, you should have, but you didn’t. You couldn’t leave him. You love him way too much even if he does you so wrong.

Kuroo has all red lights turn into green and you let him drive you insane.

But you’re getting tired of the ride that doesn’t have a destination.

——————————————————————————

“Just go see (Y/N) at her office,” Kenma tells Kuroo as the two are looking over files. “My secretary and her secretary are friends. I can ask for her schedule if you want.”

“Why would I?” Kuroo scoffs confidently and his friend deadpans at him. “What? It’s not like I miss her or something.”

“You’ve been writing her name and scratching over it like a teenager going through a heartbreak. I thought the two of you made up already?” Kenma rebuts and the raven head pouts.

“We did.” Kuroo continues to read the document, trying his best not to get distracted by invasive thoughts of you. ‘But she isn’t chasing after me like she used to.’

You really have been different. Yes, you still message him and act sweet around him, but it seems like you’re forcing your actions, especially sex. Whenever you have time to go home, you two only do the deed, then sleep, and then he wakes up to an empty bed again.

Sex is good, great even. Kuroo loves doing it with you. But it isn’t enough. When was the last time you went on a date? Or ate a meal together? Or talked about your days? When was the last time you told him you love him?

“So why are you moping around?”

‘Because I miss her,’ Kuroo’s inside thought speaks in volume. He really does miss you but he can’t say it out loud. “I don’t know man. I guess because of work.”

“But aren’t you here with me because you barely have work to do?” Kenma says in an almost teasing tone. Kuroo just rolls his eyes and ignores his friend. Oh how the tables have suddenly turned. Kenma is the one teasing him now.

Kenma then realizes that Kuroo has finally started caring about you.

Kuroo arrives at your workplace earlier than your meeting time because he’s that excited to see you. He even bought flowers for you and pastries for your workmates. It’s his way for thanking them for taking care of you at your work. Also, it’s to let them know that you’re together so they stop shipping you with other people.

“Oh, Kuroo, you’re here,” Terushima greets him as they meet in the lobby. “(Y/N) has an emergency photoshoot today so I guess it’s your lucky day.”

“Photoshoot for what?” Kuroo raises an eyebrow as he follows Terushima inside the studio of your office. There are big lighting equipments, a huge white backdrop in the room, and a lot of wedding dresses.

“For our wedding dresses catalogue. Usually, Alisa does it but she’s sick today so (Y/N) has to take her place,” Terushima explains and Kuroo nods in comprehension. “I think she’s preparing for the last dress already so you don’t have to wait long for her to finish.”

Terushima gives Kuroo a chair he can sit on and directs him to a spot where he can see you while you shoot. While waiting for you, he hands out goodies to your coworkers, bowing and thanking each one of them.

Not long after, you come out in a white tulle ball gown with white flower petals on the bodice and ends of the dress. Your hair and makeup done bridal style: subtle, elegant and will surely take the groom’s breath away. Kuroo doesn’t know why but his breathing pattern suddenly changes and his heart beat picks up a rather speedy pace.

You literally and figuratively took his breath away.

‘I feel like I’m gonna have a heart attack,’ Kuroo thinks without knowing that he has a sweet smile on his face. His eyes are staring at you in admiration, maybe even in a loving way. You just look too gorgeous in that dress it makes him wonder what you’d wear in your wedding if you even had one.

Come to think of it, what would you like your whole wedding to be?

The man is getting flustered just thinking about your wedding day. You’ll have one soon, right? It’s working out for the two of you so there definitely will be one. Or so he thinks that it’s working out for the two of you.

“Kuroo?”

“Kuroo.”

“Kuroo!”

“Yes?” Kuroo finally snaps out of his thoughts and sees Terushima smirking at him. “What?”

“You’re staring too much,” the blonde chuckles. He expects Kuroo to deny it and such so he gets shock when the raven states...

“Why wouldn’t I? My wife looks mesmerizing.” Kuroo continues to watch your shoot, his attention only on you and no one else. You finally see him, so you flash him a sweet smile and flirty wink before focusing back to your work.

Kuroo giggles with a blushing face which causes Terushima to laugh at his reaction. Terushima teases him so he hits Terushuma, telling the blonde to stop teasing him. “You are such a simp!”

The two of them are having butterflies in their stomachs because they’re lowkey like teenage girls, giggling and whispering to each other with blushes on their face, talking about the love of their life. If you’re looking from a far, you would never know what they are talking about.

The shoot finally ends and your secretary tells Kuroo to wait for you at your office. He does as told and roams around your workplace while he waits. He finds your little bedroom and sees some of your belongings in there. It must be where you sleep when you finish work when trains stop operating for the day.

Kuroo hears your door open so he gets out of the tiny room and skips to you, hugging you tightly in the middle of the room. He takes a look at your face and then tackles it with kisses, enabling you start a proper conversation.

“I missed you.”

Kiss.

“I missed you.”

Kiss.

“I missed you so much.”

Kiss.

“Tetsu, love,” you call him out in between giggles, your hands trying to cup his cheeks for him to stop, but he captures your lips with his first. Your eyes flutter close and give into his actions.

“You looked so beautiful in that dress, my love. Makes me wanna marry you again.”

You’re supposed to be happy hearing his words. Your heart should be jumping out of your rib cage by now. So why can you feel yourself forcing a smile?

“Love, do you mind if I ask you a question?” Kuroo asks you, his arms snaking around your body, nuzzling his nose on the crook your neck. You just humm, eyes closed, fingers tangled into his hair.

“What’s your ideal wedding?”

Your lids shut open from his question. “All of a sudden?”

“I just got curious.” Kuroo shrugs, waiting for your answer. He’s ready to take mental notes and use it when you plan your wedding.

“I’ve never thought about it,” you answer honestly. Kuroo moves away from you and stares, not believing the words that came out of your mouth. “What? I always knew I was getting arranged so I never thought about having my own wedding.”

“You’re a wedding planner and you never dreamed about your own wedding?” Kuroo is skeptical about your statement and he also feels disappointed?

You’ve never thought about your wedding? As in the ‘you as the bride and him as the groom’ wedding? Has it really not passed your mind even just for a second? Because that was all he was thinking about when he saw you in that wedding dress and up to this moment.

“I just don’t see myself having my own wedding,” you explain, not sparing a glance at his disheartened face.

“Not even with me?” He says without thinking, which you look at him for. You examine his face and see how he genuinely looks discouraged about your words. Not understanding why is he so hurt about your words, you cock an eyebrow at him.

“We’re married.”

“But we haven’t had a wedding ceremony. I personally think it’ll be great to have one,” Kuroo says as if it’s not a big deal, but deep inside he is making a huge fuss about it. He’s indirectly proposing to you and if you turn it down, his heart will shatter to pieces.

“Let’s see after our trying period,” is all you responded. Your response breaks him. You haven’t decided if you’ll stay with him?

He can feel his chest tigthen and hand sweat. Why are you saying that when months ago you were speaking about how much you love him? Why are you saying that when weeks ago you were begging him to forgive you?

“Don’t you love me anymore?”

——————————————————————————

Facts:

The idea of signal lights was first used on railroads to prevent trains from colliding. These signals were then adapted all over the world and used in roads since it worked so well.

The original pattern was red for danger, green for caution, and white to go. However, since white could have been easily missed against a starry sky so then it was changed to the green, yellow, and red we know of now.

The first constructed roads date from about 4000 BC

Roman roads were often stone-paved.

The Pan-American Highway is the longest roadway in the world, spanning around 19,000 miles or 30,000 kilometers

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[moose-muffin]

WE’RE READING CATCHER IN THE RYE IN MY CLASS AND LOWKEY I WAS THINKING THE SAME THING 😭 i support if you made holden hcs 100% - <3 anon

<3 ANON!!!!! MY LOVE!!!! EVERY DAY I GROW MORE CURIOUS OF WHO YOU ARE AND I HOPE SOMEDAY I CAN PROPERLY LET YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I APPRECIATE YOUR SWEET LITTLE ASKS THEY MAKE MY DAY!!!! AS FAR AS HOLDEN GOES AND THE BOOK IM S O GLAD YOU THINK THE SAME THING!!!! LIKE THE WAY HE DOESNT UNDERSTAND TOUCH THAT WELL?? YOU KNOW HE WOULD JSUT ABSOLUTELY ADORE A GENUINE LITTLE POKE TO THE SIDE BC ‘WHAT WAS THAT AND WHY DID IT FEEL KINDA NICE’ OFC HE WOULDNT SAY THAT OUT RIGHT JUST YET BUT HE’D BE THINKING IT <3 ALSO ON PAGE 27 WHEN HE HAD THE A U D A C I T Y TO SAY SMTH I THINK IT WAS LIKE “that tickled the pants off of old Ackley” HOLDEN!!! YOU MEANIE YOU CANT JUST SAY THAT WORD >:( GAHSBWKSMW JK BUT ALAS TOOK ME BY SURPRISE, LETS GET INTO SOME MORE SPECIFIC HCS, SHALL WE?

HOLDEN!!! MY BOY!!! HE JUST NEEDS A GENUINE HUG AND HE NEEDS YOU TO TELL HIM THAT YOU APPRECIATE HIM AND UR PROUD OF HIM I <33333

percentages: 66% lee, 34% ler (subject to fluctuate)

LISTEN!!!! THE REASON HE’S MORE LEE IS BC HE NEVER RLY HAD EXPERIENCE WITH TICKLING AS A KID!! AT LEAST NOT A TON??

IM SURE WHEN ALL THE CAULFIELD KIDS WERE ALIVE AND WELL THEY HAD TICKLE FIGHTS ALL THE TIME. After Allie’s death I imagine Holden kind of just tried his best to shove those sweet moments out of his mind so he didn’t have to hurt anymore.

i will say phoebe gives me big ler energy so I’m sure her and Holden have gotten into PLETNY of tickle fights over the years. I’d think Holden would start to get kinda sad about them again after allie, but sometimes he liked the attention.

im sure holden and phoebe “fought” over stuff, leading to tickle fights and all that.

OH ALSO!? THE PART IN THE BOOK WHEN PHOEBE WAS GIVING HIM THE SILENT TREATMENT BC SHE WAS MAD??? I WAS S O READY FOR HIM TO TICKLE HER THERE AND I GUARANTEE IF HE EVER FOUND HIMSELF IN THAT SITUATION AGAIN HE WOULD (vaguely remember him poking her or like pinching her or smth?? i don’t think anything came of it though :(

definitely a ler to phoebe and allie when they were younger, they played tickle monster I guarantee it!!!!!!!!!

family tickles though are a whole different thing so let’s get into friend and partner vibes!!!!!!

The reason for why he likes it has to do with the feeling of letting go and just laughing his head off was euphoric, (again why I see him as more lee) and probably neglect bc his parents are mean and I dislike them greatly)

he definitely is very ticklish, sorry I don’t make the rules!!!!!!

i also see him being rly ticklish on his upper body. ribs are a killer and poking would actually take him out.

rougher tickled tend to work better just because the lighter touch just might not sit right with him at first?? I feel like it’s lowkey sensual and he wouldn’t be feeling that until he got to know whoever he was with??? i hope that makes sense

also his reactions!!!!!! god <3 there was a part in the book where he talked abt his laugh and word for word said “I have one of these loud and very stupid laughs” and i!?! no bc that means it’s freaking adorable. he probably has little voice crack squeaks and stuff. absolutely!!!!! he ABSOLUTELY!! makes a lot of random sounds and like squeaks and noises sometimes instead of laughing bc the feeling is just so new he doesn’t know what to do with himself!? i love him

also he’s insecure abt his laugh kind of which is hinted at in the same paragraph. you know you would just tickle him and have to convince him that his laugh is so sweet and love and just bc it’s loud doesn’t mean it’s annoying!! (fic idea??? *eyes*)

moving on to ler holden bc yes maam!!! he would learn how to tickle people and then be really good at it!!! he definitely reacts more to rougher tickles as I said before (also another kind of like hint at that is I think he laughed when he got punched or smth?? could be reading too far into things though we’ll see) and since he enjoys receiving rough tickles that’s what he dishes out and it is definitely effective

i feel like if he was in a lost state, tickling could help him find something to distract himself with!!! both giving and receiving and all the little fun aspects of it

ugh I could go on forever, maybe I’ll make more later if you like these!! I’d genuinely love to or maybe I’ll do the fic we’ll see!!! anyways much love <3 anon

[holyjareau]

imo, the show was often unilaterally focused on Piper, but only on what she could do for others (Piper the wife and Piper the mother) rather than who she was as a person. Piper's individual characterization was lost sometime around s5 as soon as she got pregnant, and being a mother and wife pretty much became her sole defining characteristic for the rest of the series. I would be very interested to hear what you define as Piper's mental issues/trauma, bc as you say it doesn't get said enough

this has been in my inbox forever and i’m just getting around to it so my apologies.

but okay. so. yes. i think a lot of tv shows fall into this weird place where like. all of their characters begin with these kinda vague personalities because you’re just getting to know them. and as the show goes on, you pick up more pieces and stuff . and that’s great. that’s interesting and entertaining and it takes you on a journey and all. but often what happens is many shows fall into this pit where writers either get lazy, they change, or whatever, and the actors are tired of playing the part or whatever . and like. the characters become like. caricatures of themselves. and it just gets exhausting to watch because they’re not like. real people anymore.

Piper's individual characterization

so now for the charmed thing. so from the beginning. i have loved piper. like she’s the middle sister, overlooked, quiet, reserved, pessimistic but also realistic, gentle, thoughtful, all that. we see right away that she loves to cook .. she’s so happy her family is back together. she kept in touch with phoebe behind prue’s back. but she’s loyal to the both of them. her first idea was to have a reunion dinner when phoebe came home. she’s literally so cute n she deserves a hug. but no like. as we go on, we see that she wants to be good, she wants a stable life with no more loss, she Loves Love !! like. she wants to just be happy , open her own restaurant n just cook. she’s also so shy .. definitely panicky and anxious. and she doesn’t trust herself. she’s skeptical of everything, and she’s very thoughtful when it comes to big situations. even in the early days with leo and into season 2, she mentioned a few things about like “i’ve been thinking a lot about this...” and you can see she’s good at communicating with people. she’s also got these other dimensions to her like . she is interested in lots of cuisine types, she loves to read (and is a camus fan !!) , she drives a jeep (which i wanna know how she got bc i have questions), when she found out she was a witch her first thought was just . i need to go and see if i am still a good person . and she went to church. prue was surprised to learn that piper enjoys knitting. in the early seasons (especially mid-late season 3) we saw her with her plants and all. she’s just this natural peacekeeper. but like. we literally got a crying scene in the second episode because she was so conflicted about this. and she’s such a deep and complex character that i fell in love with so fast . and like . literally my favourite fictional character to exist . genuinely holly breathed so much life into piper . anyway . so. here’s the thing.

being a mother and wife pretty much became her sole defining characteristic for the rest of the series

like. piper was who i described above. and like . i kinda think . a bit. that like . the writers . especially in s4 . were like . hmm well  . she’s just lost prue, she’s gonna be grieving . and like we need more for her. so. she’s been married to leo for the better part of a year, been with him for like . 3 years. so. let’s maybe consider giving them a kid but not just yet . just Content kinda stuff. so anyway they drop little hints in here and there starting in like . 4x07 i think? which . brain drain really paid the rent . fully just. holly did so well. but like. that ep was just. a neat way of looking into her mind and seeing the horrors of manipulation and gaslighting and everything . and of course holly knocked it out of the park. but at that point, they were kinda like . hmm . kids ? and they started toying with the idea, having piper and leo consider it, talk about it, they had paige and phoebe ask about it , all of that good stuff. as you do. made for some funny tv at some points. and like . i really, really Get It . when piper’s like . ahh the baby wouldn’t be safe around here !!!! like. Girl, Valid . your sister just died and like . you went on forever about how she was The Most Powerful One . The Strongest One . and yet she still died . so she’s like ??? am i next ?? and like obv it doesn’t make sense for her to jump on this train of like . i’m gonna have a kid !!!! so she’s really valid in her thought process there. and like. after having wyatt . i think the writers really . idk. couldn’t do waaay too much with her character anymore because i feel like . to an extent, anything she does will be scrutinized bc i’m not just . saying this . i rlly feel like sometimes piper’s the easiest to hate. like idk why but i loved her. but anyway. if she stays at home with wyatt and doesn’t wanna fight demons n all . then she’s selfish towards her sisters n she’s awful n prue wouldn’t have let her do that !!!! etc . but if she fought demons it’s like . uh sweetie you have a child . really ??? why put yourself in a situation that might have you ending up like patty 2.0 ... bc i could do a Whole post on how patty’s situation messed piper up the most. but anyway.

it’s the way i’m fully rambling so if you’re reading this . i love you . anyway okay . so . i think in a tv show you’ve gotta kinda check boxes. the best tv shows have characters you see yourself in . you relate to them. you hear them and understand their decisions and actions and thoughts. the things they do just makes sense 2 you. so like. with prue, anyone married to their job could relate to her. any oldest sibling could see themselves in her, you know ? she was hard-working, committed, logical, protective. and with phoebe, anyone who couldn’t “settle down” in their early 20s related 2 her, anyone who felt like the outcast of the family, the “screw-up” .. right. makes sense. she was so kind, caring, had-your-back kinda girl. we all love those. paige was like . the new kid, trying to fit in, creative, curious, and definitely a lifelong learner. and then there’s piper who was shy, resistant, really just wanted to be normal. and loved. and i think everyone could kinda identify with at least one of the sisters regardless of where you stood in your own family. so as the show went on, it’s like . they still want you to keep watching and keep being able to identify with them because it’s not like they’re humans with normal lives so they’ve already kinda lowkey got that going against them . so their more “human” and normal lives... we’ve gotta be able to identify with them to be able to invest time. so they had prue always working, having trouble balancing love and work, looking out for her family. we had phoebe kinda living her life, getting her career going, then kinda wanting a family. we had paige learning magic and being super interested and involved and then getting married. and we had piper who had her career pretty early on, got married, and had kids. like. i think the big thing is the marriage and kids. and when you’re a mother . the only mother really in the show, the show lowkey centres around you . like. for starters, the show usually is in the manor, and if you’re a mother, you’re very likely at home, esp with young kids. so i think that alone kinda was like . huh yeah . won’t see piper out waaay too much anymore i guess !!! but no like . there’s That. that’s kinda. the thing that really can’t change with the show . like. piper’s got kids now and a husband and very, very likely . her life will be centred around her home. which. listen she’s wanted that i think - the stability . she’s wanted that forever. and this is the form it came in. but i should stop rambling here and cut to the point .

Piper's mental issues/trauma

disclaimer: i’m not diagnosing her, i’m just speculating based off of my own experiences with mental health

so. okay. very early on. we saw that anxiety. like. yes . she was nervous about like a whole new life experience . or whatever we’re gonna call it when you figure out you’re a witch . but like she was Anxious . like. crying in the attic over being a bad person . needing phoebe to talk her down by telling her she’s such a caring person, she’s always doing things for other people . and then there’s the whole anxiety that comes with. my family’s falling apart because my sisters are fighting so i use really awkward methods of getting out of things . like using humour as a coping mechanism !!! which. gave us some iconic one-liners. but that’s beside the point . anyway. point is. early on, that anxiety was there. there’s an ep in season 1 where she’s literally entering a panic attack in her kitchen and phoebe’s using a menu to cool her down. like. Yikes! and then she’s just. her awkward self around everyone but that’s endearing and is just part of her personality . and i think a lot of the anxiety stemmed from childhood. we heard a few times about how prue and phoebe had boyfriends growing up, were always pretty and popular and all. phoebe was popular, too, just, in the other crowd. but nonetheless, piper faded into the background, doing well in math - well enough to go off and be a banker . and like. she sacrificed a lot for grams. she stayed in san francisco ... we all know the girl had the marks for stanford or something . like. though . still, i think she liked the stability of home and prob would’ve stayed . but in 3x17 she’s all !!! grams !!! the doctor said no caffeine !!! and when grams was taking the pic of them outside and she had an episode , piper was all !!!! shallow breaths !!! like. it was clear piper was the one taking her to the appointments and footing the bill. like. she literally became a banker just bc it had benefits n stuff. like. poor girl really thought . anyway that’s a whole spiral. but no. like she really sacrificed The Most for her family and everyone still thought she was selfish for wanting to move out . when like back then grams was literally ... sick ... and prue was out here moving out and phoebe was nowhere to be found . so. that . definitely would have added to her anxiety about even wanting to do anything for herself because she’ll be perceived as selfish in a heartbeat. even if it’s not Mean . it’s just. she’d never risk it. but there’s the anxiety. there are a few lil things here n there about how she gets nervous n stuff, she represses things (3x07 i think was where phoebe said piper represses her anger n just sucks it up n does whatever) . she literally cancelled her doctor’s appointment Twice . anyway. it still angers me. then in season 7 . patty and victor were like . oh she had night terrors that were so bad we took her to the doctor ! and i just ... honey . baby. she thought she caused the divorce. at 4? 5? she watched victor leave on her 5th birthday, watched a demon attack her, grams, and victor. prue said she didn’t cry at patty’s funeral and i’ll make a safe bet that piper did. and i think growing up without patty was strange for sure. prue had more memories and phoebe had none. and piper had fragments of this person everyone loved . and she was stuck between knowing her and not knowing her. and when patty was sent to her for her wedding day, (as well as in 1x17) . both times when patty hugged them . prue and phoebe hugged her, eyes closed n all. while piper was on the outside, eyes open . looking numb as all hell . and you know. i rlly think she was Giving Them That because phoebe didn’t get her and prue kinda . in a way. lost more of her . if that makes sense ?? and i just. patty really was like . they sent me to You. and 5 seconds later . piper’s like . they sent mom to Us !!! and it’s that idea of sacrifice and never having anything for yourself because she was never just . given anything for herself . everything in her life has been a sacrifice and as a mother, that’s perpetuated. she can assume that role with more of a purpose . like. people won’t really feel sorry for her now as the “forgotten” sister, they won’t try and coddle her or anything. and another thing. control. piper craved stability and control. i think while cooking was something she loved, it also gave her a lot of control . she could control her whole kitchen . even in season 8 .. maybe vaya con leos actually . leo mentioned how much piper craves control. and the control motif makes sense with her powers too. like. piper craved control so much that her powers allowed her to control things down to the atom. so there’s the whole anxiety and needing to control things to ease her anxiety and all. there’s That whole thing.

and then we get to the infamous season 5 fearless spell . ms girl really sat in the attic just writing everything on the wall and it’s the way i screenshotted it and like . zoomed in and tried deciphering it . and like . there’s words like “stop” and i think “sister” is in there a few times, so is “loss” or “lost”. when i watch it next i’ll grab a cap because it’s . disturbing. girl was so scared . literally was writing a spell to get rid of her fears . she also writes Fear . as in. capital F . and like. yeah that’s deep but i do it too like i emphasize words with a capital letter . and like holly marie combs might just have quirky n fun writing but like ... capital F . for Fear. for real . that’s . trauma !!! and she also was having panic attacks at the beginning of season 5. let’s not forget those. which ... we should’ve gotten more of an explanation for . i hope that girl is getting help bc she was Going Through It . and in season 7 when zankou reads her diary . firstly. we Knew this girl kept a diary like . for Sure . she did. and just that little excerpt of when prue died . oops. i’d pay big money to see the rest because again i just think she’s got such a complex mind and like. i’d be so interested to read that. and i think everything re: prue is just Awful for her. like . idk if this is just something quirky i noticed but obv we know prue died in may 2001 . but at the end of 4x03, when piper goes 2 paige’s work 2 bring her muffins !! soft !!! the calendar on one of the desks reads july 2001 ... and i really just. ms girl. i Know they prob just filmed the ep in july but it honestly tracks that she’d be so awfully upset about everything and just . barely able to do anything but cook . for 2 months. like. honey. baby. i wanted 2 just cuddle her bc she was so sad. and like. she tells paige she’s having “good hours” and “not so good hours” . she’s going by the Hour . by the Hour . just. need i say more . i’m so . but no like. if anything like i could see her having like . depression where she’s high-functioning and like just . walking depression i guess ?? like . not even after prue. i think in general. like . she definitely has a melancholic temperament and a type 6 enneagram (the skeptic). that’s For Sure . but i think. just. she’s always just had time to think bc she’s always alone, reading, knitting, cooking, tending to her plants, all that. and i just . think. she has issues. and i think prue knew that. of all people. and i think her knowing that . and then dying. destroyed piper. she lost the last person that was truly a constant in her life . like they shared a roof over their heads forever. and then she was just . gone . and piper was suddenly left to pick up the pieces . and become the oldest sister . and i’m So glad she didn’t fully assume her personality. i’m glad she stayed as piper . just. she’s more cynical and snarky and defensive and cold and that’s okay. she’s hurting. she’s always gonna hurt . and i think it makes her human . she’s pessimistic and sad and has a short fuse at times . but just. again. i love her to bits and i think those issues make her more relatable for me. because while many like to say she became selfish and a negative person and just . awful to be around . i’d say the opposite . i won’t sit and apologize or justify things. also i don’t think piper’s done anything wrong . i just think she’s hurt. she’s been wronged so many times. and she’s .... scared. i think she’s scared . and in season 5 “sympathy for the demon” we learn her true biggest fear is her happiness being stolen away. and like . it’s not that she’s scared she won’t be happy. she’s scared all of the good she’s got will be taken from her . and that’s . terrifying . so . i see why she’s so snarky and bitter and tired and all . she’s terrified of things being taken from her like they have been her whole life. and as i watch the show i really like to just keep that in mind as i get further and further in because yes. she did become a mother and a wife and we saw her arguing with leo a lot and their marriage falling apart and That Whole Era . we saw how it kind of took over her life but i think it happens . i think she even said at one point . i’ve been so many things to so many people, i don’t know who i am anymore . and i think it sums her up perfectly. she doesn’t know who she is because she’s someone to everyone . she’s just. nobody to herself except this scared little girl who just wants Something . Anything . to make sense . some Stability . and her babies, her husband, and her sisters . are all she has for that idea of stability to make sense in her mind. and it was an easy hole to fall into - the Mother - but i think she jumped in. because at the Very Least . nobody could take that title away from her . regardless of how hard they tried .

[clarz-cc-archive]

answered April 23, 2020

Q: i know it’s probably just this fandom being weird about people having their own feelings and tastes, but i genuinely feel so guilty for having notps here. am i the only one who has ships they just dislike? not because of the specific members and not with the intention to hate on anyone or take those feelings as the One Truth (i would never ruin other people’s fun over it!!), but just in a ‘i don’t wanna see them on my timeline so i’m gonna mute the word’ way? i have about 5 or 6 shipnames muted either because i’m not into the fandom’s take on them or just because they don’t do much for me or remind me of weird friendships i had etc, or just because they’re on my timeline too often for the amount of times i’m in the mood for them... i’ve seen tons of ppl being like ‘if you have a notp in RPF i don’t want u here’ and i don’t fully get it. no pressure to answer this ever, i just think you’re neat and am curious if other ppl even have notps in real people fandoms i guess or if people think it’s Wrong!?

A: omg i've never heard the take that in rpf specifically you can't have notps but i shouldn't be surprised at the things ppl will come up with i guess 😂😂 why would it be worse to have a notp in a rpf fandom vs a fiction fandom i'm so genuinely confused!! everyone is allowed to like certain dynamics over others, i feel like this fandom in particular is so big on trying to police others' fan experiences, as if there is a Right way to be here or Right things to like and like, dude! i'm here bc i like a kpop group (a LOT) and i wanna talk to other people who also like them (a LOT), i never signed any kind of Acceptable ARMY Behavior Contract can we stop acting like there's some kind of unified code of behavior aside from just like.... the one of general basic human decency?? it's all fake fun and we all have certain types of relationships that speak to us more than others because we're different people! i guess i can see the "no notps in rpf" angle if you're assuming that your having a notp means that you're gonna get angry every time those members are together and will leave them nasty comments or attack people who are happy to see them together or something, but i mainly see that happening with tinhats, so i think once again this might be an issue with rpf fandoms no longer seeming to differentiate between shipping (fictional! fun! absolutely fake and we all know it!) and tinhatting (aka I Think They Are Fucking In Real Life and Management and/or Specific Members I Dislike Are Keeping Them From Going Public.) anyway, while i will read fic for every ship and HAVE read fic for every ship, i fully have favorites and there are also ones that i'm just not as interested in and where like, look, i'll read a fic about it or i'll talk about it but ur gonna have to lowkey drag me into it 😂 (also like.... sorry but there are certain ships where if that's your main ship i'm gonna be suspicious of you until i get a better read on what you're like as a person because uhhhhh some ships in particular are full of tinhats and i don't fuck with that energy!) but also like, if i'm not that into a ship i just stay quiet about it! because like you said i'm not here to rain on anyone else's parade! it's just not for me and that's fine!

asks in response to this one: #1

[phlondie]

okay ik this is an opinion no one asked for but now im thinking about the whole dan and phil joint branding as opposed to Dan Branding™ and Phil Branding™. also this is fully adding onto posts on @ browncesario and @ demonetisation’s blogs and i feel too awkward to tag them bc i dont wanna make anyone feel obligated to read this lol but if i repeat anything they said or their anons said its not on purpose!

but like, full disclaimer while i love dan and phil i feel like its always been kind of obvious that they were marketing their relationship to us? obv not so much anymore but like... as much as people who dont keep up w dnp like to pretend that their only awareness of us as a fanbase was creepy objectifying shippers who should feel ashamed for harassing them etc etc, they’ve always been way more tuned into their audience than i think people realize. like they’ve *known* what we’re like, and i dont even mean just the bad parts. like they *know* that a lot of their fanbase is queer and genuinely has looked up to them as queer role models long before they were out, and a lot of that hinges on us understanding they were a couple. and ik they resented it and i wasn’t really part of the fanbase until a few years ago but hearing stories of how dan would react on liveshows sometimes and the like, barely concealed resentment for the fans sometimes shows that while they definitely had issues with it (which like,,, is fair), they also knew they were kind of stuck in a rut. because if their primary source of fans are people who like seeing them together, that meant that their success as youtubers/creators/etc depended on keeping those fans right where they were.

and to be clear! i know ive never been here primarily for their relationship; i started watching them bc i thought they were funny together and had a good dynamic, which wouldve been possible even if they really were just friends. i didnt get emotionally invested in the projection part of it until later. but even so, i was always aware as a fan that they were selling to us the speculation of their relationship.

and this is def pulling from other posts ive seen today but considering the fanfic part of tatinof, the fact that they wrote fanfic in tabinof and incorporated shippy fan art into the youtube versions, giving the people what they want, even little things like the conjoined baking challenge vid.... they wanted us to stay curious about their relationship. Even if on a very real level it was literally bringing back trauma for them, there was this weird cognitive dissonance between “im angry at people for speculating about us” and “look here, dont stop speculating about us! look we’re sharing a sweater! look we’re being ~domestic~ in ditls!”

which is also why i thought the hiatus wouldnt last long tbh, like i was genuinely shocked that after the success of ii they would completely separate their brandings from each other in 2019. and i wont @ this person but someone said it best years ago when they said that joint branding had to die for dnp to come out. bc it really did; how could they keep up the speculation if we have literally almost all the puzzle pieces laid out? when they’ve primed their audience to actively hunt down these pieces (even if again, they would rather have not, esp given what they each talked about in their coming out videos), but they dont *want* us to put it all together, how could they sustainably make joint content while keeping the speculation fanbase there? bc once the speculation is over, people are gonna keep wanting more. (and disclaimer i really dont think this applies to like....anyone i follow on here tbh bc in general i feel like we’re fine w them keeping their boundaries where they are, but we’ve all seen posts like that that indicate that people *will* want more, and thats something that they’re unwilling to give and understandably so).

anyway this all goes to the main thing that brought all this on today lol, ever since 2019 they’ve been trying to cultivate their own separate branding from each other, and while i’m here for it tbh, surely they know that they’ll never escape their old joint branding. Which also means never escaping the spectre of relationship speculation. so i have mixed feelings about seeing dan act shocked that people could ever speculate about his private life once he became famous bc like 1) thats literally just what happens when you become famous, and 2) ....he and phil egged it on up to a point, and that doesnt mean it didnt upset them but it definitely feels off for dan to always be so pikachu face about having had fans that speculated about his relationship. like dan you literally wrote erotic fanfiction about you and phil, pieced together fan art illustrating it that showed you and phil in a homoerotic lens, and yet you’re *still* acting shocked and indignant that fans got invested in your relationship/the possibility of your relationship?? idk man. its confusing bc at the time i took things like that as “oh, we’re in on the joke,” but ever since 2019 they’ve made it more clear that we’re not, but we’re also not *not* in on it to an extent (looking at you, cah phan edition)

so im def still excited for dan’s book (like the subject doesnt terribly interest me tbh but i do wanna see what he does with it and read whatever highlights inevitably get posted on here), but as always w the end of regular joint content, im lowkey here for the over-analyzing about the relationship between dan, phil, their fans, and their content bc dear god we never run out of material to rant about

[seijorhi]

asks :)

once again, i’m terrible at answering things :)

First off, your newest Kuroo story WRECKED ME. OMMMMMG LIKE IT'S SOOO FUCKING GOOD. You are one of the most incredible writers ever, like professional style writing. These should be books and you should get paid for it, honestly. Your skill is totally unmatched, my friend. I just adore everything you write. I had two questions thou about the story, just because I am totally obsessed by it- so has Kuroo been obsessed with her since he saw her, I'm like curious how his obsession started 

like is it because she's young and he's interested? Cuz I totally got the vibes at the party that he was showing her off like she was his girlfriend and he seems like he has been wanting her for awhile. I was just curious about how it started cuz god I'm a simp for yandere kuroo- boss man Kuroo would make me weakkkkk. My second question is so is he like obsessively in love with her or is it like just a this hot piece of ass is mine to fuck kinda thing? Like does he want a relationship?

anyways, I love you and I love your writing. Everything you write is legit perfection! Thank you for all your beautiful stories you share with us! - Kai

first of all, whomst gave you the right to be so damn sweet???!?! dsgsjkl thank you, bby!

so, like with all my fics i kind of have a ‘read into it how you want’ thing going for it. whether or not kuroo actually has ‘romantic’ (i use that word loosely) feelings for the reader or whether he just enjoys fucking her because he’s in a position of power and she’s easily manipulated is left a little up to your interpretation and how you’d prefer to imagine it. however, having said that there are little hints throughout the fic that imply that there’s a little more depth to kuroo’s feelings. you’re not wrong with the whole ‘showing her off’ vibe at the party, and there’s mentions of confessions that kuroo gives while he’s fucking the reader - also the title of the fic, invidia, means envy in latin. so take that how you will 🤷‍♀️

and as far as how it all began, i like to think that it was kind of a slow build. again it’s implied that kuroo has met the reader (however briefly) a few times before - at games as nekoma’s manager, when she initially was introduced as his girlfriend and she has stayed over at their place in the past. it wasn’t so much a singular moment, but kuroo’s definitely been paying more attention to her than she realises. 

WHAT WHAT WHAT???? RHI UHMMM WAS KUROO IN LOVE WITH THE READER???? 👀👀👀👀 HOLY SHIT. I'm honestly mind blown rn like I have a lot of questions like did Shin know? Was he also into it? Omg the idea of Father and Son sharing reader...

(also I def did not hope that Bokuto was also there cuz that would have be fun....oppsss)🙊

hehehe

no, shin didn’t know but oh can you imagine the betrayal if he did? if he willingly set up the reader to be fucked by his dad 👀god damn

adsfgdhjfkfl there was a moment i genuinely considered having something more happen at the christmas party where bo would stumble across and one thing would lead to another.... but i decided not to go that route. this one needed to be solo kuroo haha

Rhi, what can I say, amazing as always!

ahhh thank you sm, bby!

Hi i absolutely love the kuroo fic at first no one would actually notice he was into and then story actually rises nicely however i would like to ask like what happens later im sorry im a little burnt out from my mountains of assignments that i cant think of a possible aftermath since the story had an open ending but yeah what happens later after the whole scene does y/n stay there for the 7 days and get r*ped again or she goes home early and like what happens to kuroo and shinsuke im sorry for annoying you with questions its fully up to you whether u would like to answer or not :-)

aw, thank you! I hope your assignments and stuff are all done? And pls bby, you’re not annoying me at all 💕💕💕

Honestly again, it’s kind of left up to what you like to think would happen, but personally I think that the reader stays, because there’s no easy way to get out of that situation without raising suspicion - which means that she then has to spend the next week trying unwittingly playing cat and mouse with Kuroo who’s gonna use every damn opportunity he has to push your boundaries 👀

Duuuuude invidia fucked me up! Like fuck, lol! The build up was so spectacular! It makes me wonder two things: how did kuroo’s obsession start, and what would shin have done if he caught them (and why do I feel like he’d join in... I guess it runs in the family lol).

I loved it sooooo much and im also so creeped out lol. Can’t trust other people’s dads. Everything about it was perfect!

glad you liked it, bby!!

shin’s a good boy and he genuinely loves the reader, but i think if he did stumble across the two of them he’d just shut down and walk away. it’d be the biggest betrayal in his eyes - it wouldn’t matter if you were drunk or he was, who came onto who - the two most important people in his life going behind his back would just break him :( and i think he probably wouldn’t give either of them a chance to explain

but if we’re talking degenerate shin... 👀👉👈

imagine if invidia! reader gets pregnant and Shin thinks it’s his, but its actually his dad’s 🤭

oooh kuroo would be such a smug little shit - he’d get extra touchy feely with the reader, drop ‘casual’ hints, basically doing everything outside of straight up admitting it to him, just to see how far he can push until shin starts to doubt whether he’s actually the father - when it’s just the two of you though... i think he’d be a little softer - but equally as possessive - you’re his, and so’s the kid growing inside of you

Kuroo: son do you know what a cuck is? Shinnosuke: no? Kuroo: wOULD YOU LIKE TO FIND OUT - @south-korea-cakes

dagshjskl i snorted when i read this but you’re not wrong lmao

hi rhi! i have a question about Lion’s Den! did oikawa purposely set the reader up to witness his true nature? or was it chance that she saw him kill?

no - i think he’d rather have kept you in the dark a little longer and tried to let things develop ‘organically’ but he’s not upset that you did find out the truth - gives him an excuse to move things along and take what he wants 👀

hey rhi:) soo my boyfriend of two years just broke up with me and so far a major comfort has just been rereading your stories. something about feeling desired, ya know? anyway, thanks for making me feel a little better <3 - @theofficialhufflepuff

aw i’m sorry to hear that :( i’m glad my fics can help make you feel a lil better - sending love bby! 💕

omg i adore everything in the soulmate series hello !! would any of the soulmate pairings ever end up feeling lowkey competitive w/ the other?? like all of them seem to mutually respect the other but would there ever come a point where smth pushes them into trying to outdo ur other soulmate when it comes to ur affection?

also have i mentioned how much i love ur writing bc i love ur writing

hmmm, not so much with oikawa & iwa or ushijima and tendou because i think they have pretty rock solid relationships with each other prior to the reader coming along - if they did it would only be minor stuff

the twins on the other hand - good fucking luck with them because they’ll turn everything into a competition. the moment one twin thinks you’re favouring the other too much expect to get dragged across the room and forced to spend ‘quality time’ with the other. it’s all very petty and exhausting and there is no possible chance for you to win. but thank you sweetheart!!

tonight im thinking about The Final Girl! boys forcing you to share a bed with them for the first time. With Kuroo’s face buried in the crook of your neck, one big hand palming your breast for good measure, Bo holding onto your waist, and Kaashi’s legs tangled with yours. its suffocating, really😪😓

asdgdhjdkdl suffocating? yes. now where do i sign up?? 🥺

you are so talented in writing it's crazy!! just the way you articulate things is ugh *chef's kiss*. i hope you are doing well and not receiving hate 🥺 ily pls

ahhh thank you so much, messages like these always make me so happy! ily bby! 💕

more karasuno first years soon? 👀

who’s to say?? i don’t have any full fics planned but maybe some concepts and thirsts??

if you make a yandere msby fic i’ll literally lose it i love your writing

👀i am considering it

[jthebeauty]

Jeeeeeeen! I saw that you said you were one the ace spectrum and I’m curious as to how you realize that? I’m questioning my own sexuality rn and a lot of info online is confusing to me LOL. You dont have to answer if you aren’t comfortable tho ofc!

hey nonnie :) ofc we can talk about it! i’m more than comfortable with sharing my story & experience. <3

cw: first kiss, kissing in general, sex talk, sti mention, children mentions, relationships. long post ahead.

growing up, i always naturally admired the romantic aspects in a relationship.

things like dates, breakfast-in-bed, writing love letters, holding hands, cooking meals together, taking silly photos together, (and all that other sappy stuff) really shaped what i desire in a relationship. fun fact; ever since i was 8 or so, i knew i wanted to spend my honeymoon in paris, france (the city of love they call it 😌).

i need to go back into my past a lil’ so you can see where i’m coming from & where it started. 😬 sorry if you get a lil’ uncomfy. 😭🙏🏽

so. i had my first kiss in kindergarten with a handsome guy; a handsome guy who i’d probably still be nervous around as adults. idk, i haven’t seen him in person since i was 14. anyways, i was five years old at the time & the memory of our kiss still runs in my mind here n there.

we liked each other again in grade 6 & we communicated via sticky notes (bc we couldn’t talk during the lesson). 😭 but yeah, he cared a lot about my feelings & always knew when something was up. he’d rub me on the back & talk with me to make me feel better— he was genuinely a sweetheart.

so at 11 years old, due to my “kiddy crush/relationship” experiences with that guy, i viewed relationships as something cute & romantic.

sex was never really on my mind throughout middle school unless it concerned p.e. (physical education). but if anything, p.e. most likely contributed to how i am today. in health class, we talked about sti’s n stuff & i just remember being like umm… if i were to have sex, it’d have to be with someone i know really well & trust. i still feel this way today.

all of that wasn’t planned though, that’s just how it naturally was in my mind— even with peers constantly discussing who did what with who and where around me. sex talk (& rumours of that kind of stuff) were always around me, yet it never interested me or sparked curiosity within me.

i didn’t know for sure that i was on the ace spectrum till high school.

i started speculating when i was about 15 or so (after i had kissed my best friend romantically… more than once). i was able to confirm this once i had my first serious relationship at 16– borderline 17.

i was always excited for the romantic stuff like dates, texting good morning/night messages, even taking polaroid pictures together (once again, sex or anything beyond kissing wasn’t really on my mind for some reason). we even used to call each other practically every day once school ended & we parted ways. real sappy stuff lol.

i also need to add that we didn’t date until we had known each other (as friends) for a good 9-10 months. i knew of my ex since grade 9, but we didn’t become friends until grade 10.

my ex isn’t the first person i have kissed romantically, but they were another person who i had kissed after having some sort of close friendship with (or else it wouldn’t have happened to begin with).

in conclusion, i was in a +2.5 year relationship with my ex. i take relationships seriously, as i’m not one to do flings, one-night stands, situationships, or hook-ups/sneaky links. they don’t interest me one bit & i honestly kinda forget those kind of things exist (i think mainly bc of the pandemic & i’m under the assumption that people aren’t going out as often as they used to).

looking over everything that i can recall from my life, i lowkey consider myself a hopeless romantic LOL. i often read erotic romance novels that revolve around forbidden romance, enemies-to-lovers & stuff of that nature. i was (& still am) obsessed with romance.

i can experience sexual attraction, i’m not completely disinterested in the idea of sex. i want to have kids one day & get married— it’s just a matter of who.

i came to the conclusion that i strongly identify as demisexual & graysexual. i bounce between the two bc i really can’t just pick one. and it’s more than okay if you find yourself in this situation too— you don’t have to pick one & stick to it.

when my ex & i were together, i did experience sexual attraction (bc we had an emotional connection/bond + romantic feelings), but the more we got settled into our relationship, the less those sexual feelings would pass in my mind. i’m the kind of lover that shows my love & affection by cuddling, talking, or helping my partner— stuff of that nature.

for me it was just a matter of thinking “would i do this with a stranger just because they’re attractive?” or “would i do a fwb situation with ____?” and the answer to those kind of questions would be no. i’m just not interested or appealed by the idea of doing things like that with someone who i’m not romantically AND emotionally involved with. the only way we’re doing that, is if we’re mutually romantically AND emotionally involved with each other.

i guess you could say that sex is something “special” to me as well. i just seriously can’t do it with anyone— not even if i find them attractive, it takes so much more than that. but on the other hand, i’m just more of a romantic person anyways.

irl sex is never really at the forefront of my mind & if it is, it’s gone within a few seconds of reflecting on it. in fact, i kind of cringe thinking on past sexual incidents with my ex… like my brain just won’t allow me to reminisce about them & i’m actually glad bc i just don’t feel like purposefully thinking about irl sex anyways. 😭

sorry for the long post! i just really wanted to be transparent with you. but the above is mainly why i see myself on the ace spectrum. it took me a good 4-5 years to come this realization, so i really do feel you nonnie.

if there’s anything you wanna know further, feel free to swing on by again or message me on discord (if you have me there). i really do wish you all the best in navigating your sexuality, it seriously can be reallyyy confusing (especially with the internet as you said).

sending kisses to you my love. take care. 😚❤️