#gender is fake

[unavailableapple]

The insanity of the trans movement is how genuinely hateful they are of female anatomy. Any slight mention of vulvas just EXISTING is met with such animosity and anger. I love my vag and I love every other pussy on earth and that’s never gonna stop. This is not sexual. I LOVE FEMALE ANATOMY. It deserves to be made into art, to be celebrated, to be worshipped. If you cannot hold space for that, I will not hold space for you.

[hyperlexichypatia]

Follow up to this post where I was asked about the "Autism presents differently in girls" myth, which is one of my many berserk buttons.

Here is a non-exhaustive list of reasons this concept makes no sense and you should stop saying it:

A. Autistic people are more likely than non-autistic people to be trans, nonbinary, or otherwise gender-non-conforming, so any attempt to group autistic people by binary, birth-assigned gender is even less likely to be accurate than the gender binary already is in the general population.

2. There is absolutely no evidence supporting the "presents differently" theory that could not be better explained by clinician bias.

iii. The alleged "presentation differences" between autistic "girls" and "boys" are just bog-standard gender stereotypes with "autism" plugged in somewhere. "Boys are better at math and science and logic and not having feelings and their dominant emotion is Anger, but girls are better at socializing and caretaking and brushing hair and their dominant emotion is Approval-Seeking." "Huh, that sounds like reactionary sexist hogwash." "No, I mean, autistic boys are better at math and science and logic and not having feelings and their dominant emotion is Anger, but but autistic girls are better at socializing and caretaking and brushing hair and their dominant emotion is Approval-Seeking." "Oh, okay, now it's Objective Science."

four. Sexist bias, including among clinicians, tends to frame "male" neurodivergence as essentially cognitive and "female" neurodivergence as essentially emotional, because, as we all know, Men Think, Women Feel. Psychology is obsessed with the idea that "girls" are universally and inherently self-loathing and self-destructive -- anything a "girl" has trouble with cannot possible be a skill she hasn't learned or an ability she doesn't have, let alone merely a different way of being; she must simply be self-abnegatingly denying herself the thing she cannot do. So a "girl" with the same traits as an "autistic boy" will have those traits attributed to something emotional, like depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, borderline personality disorder, or eating disorders. "Autistic girls" aren't being "missed" (read as neurotypical); they're having their exact same autistic traits as "autistic boys" being framed as mood disorders instead of neurodevelopmental disabilities.

cinco. Fundamentally, this premise gets completely backward what diagnosis means and why pathologization happens. People are pathologized and diagnosed, with any kind of disability, when they have traits that fall outside the range of traits considered "acceptable" for their position. "It's more acceptable for boys to have meltdowns, so autistic boys have more meltdowns than autistic girls, so the boys get diagnosed with autism" -- No, this doesn't make sense. That's not how diagnosis works. If it were more acceptable for boys to have meltdowns, then boys who have meltdowns would not be getting diagnosed with anything. Their behavior would not be seen as pathological. If "It's more acceptable for boys to have meltdowns" were to explain any kind of diagnosis differential, it would be "Therefore girls who have meltdowns are diagnosed, while boys who have meltdowns are just considered normal boys." And, to be clear, that kind of thing is absolutely a factor in gender differences in diagnosis, but in the opposite direction from how people mean it. Like, as a "girl," I wasn't really expected or pressured to be athletic, so my absolutely abysmal gross motor skills were just shrugged at and not seen as a sign of disability. Can't run or throw? Well, I was a girl, and a nerd to boot. What do you expect? A "boy" with my level of gross motor skills would draw a lot more Concern.

ζ. "Girls are pressured to mimic/mask more than boys are," even if true (debatable), elides over the fact that many autistic "girls" can't "mimic/mask," because they are disabled. They have a disability. Because some of the things their society expects them to be able to do are things that they cannot, in fact, do. "Girls don't have meltdowns because they're not allowed to. Girls don't forget to do essential tasks because they're not allowed to. Girls don't --" Okay but they do. Girls do in fact very much do those things. Because they are disabled. Because they have disabilities. Because there are things they are expected to be able to do, which they cannot, in fact, do. And it's weirdly disability-erasing (ableist) to claim that people simply develop the ability to do things they can't do just because they're expected to.

heptad. Circling back to point A., while I can't prove it, I really think a lot of this "gendered autism" stuff is a way to pathologize and also explain away queerness/transness/gender-non-conformity in diagnosed-autistic kids. "Oh, no, don't worry, the reason your son consistently Fails At Masculinity isn't because he's some kind of sissy; it's actually because he has this Masculine Male Boy Disorder where he just doesn't understand how boys are supposed to behave. Lots of boys have it. No, no, the reason your 12 year old son is kissing his male friend on the mouth isn't because he's gay; he just has a social skills disorder and doesn't know that boys don't kiss their platonic guy mate dude friends. It's a very masculine disability. Elon Musk has it." I know somebody who was told by an Autism Mom that all autistic people are bisexual because "They don't know the difference." Sure, keep telling yourself that.

8️⃣. In the past, when I was less Galaxy Brain Mad Radicalized, I conceptualized the phenomenon of "'Boys' are diagnosed with autism while 'girls' with the exact same traits are diagnosed with depression/anxiety/OCD/BPD/ED" as a phenomenon of "Autistic girls, who objectively are autistic, whose objectively, scientifically correct diagnosis is autism, are misdiagnosed with psych disorders instead." But what neither autistic nor Mad people really want to admit is that "autism" is as arbitrary a diagnostic category as any other. No two human brains are exactly alike. All systems of classification are made up. I happen to think that the proposed explanatory mechanism of "autism" (brain processes sensory input/information differently than average, results in wildly uneven skill development) is generally more accurate than the proposed explanatory mechanism of most psych diagnoses (people are weird somehow and that's bad somehow), but it's still fairly arbitrary. People with autism diagnoses get ABA and people with psych diagnoses get CBT/DBT, and you can argue about which is worse, but ultimately anything with a B in it is fundamentally abusive. Abolish psychiatry.

[thomas-flynn]

So much of me going masc again was influenced by afab people staying "lesbians" and being more welcome in the community than trans women.

Just give up being a lesbian. They'll never accept you. Deep down they hate you and they're afraid of you. You'll say some weird mentally ill or horny shit (man coded) and scare their cozy vibes.

Just do what they do, fuck gay men. Transmascs can be lesbians so transfems can be f*ggots. Most t4t transfem lesbians are girlcock perverts anyway. Just admit you're all gay men, give up fighting like labels change anything.

They're all "gynosexual" and you're a f*g. They're all saying "gender is fake" too. They're right. You're a crossdressing man. Man up and accept it, be proud of all the gay men that fought for your rights.

[depressdbitch]

When It comes to criticize Dylan Mulvaneys new song, TRAs go by "oh but cis girls makes songs about stereotypical girls things too!"

The difference Is that these cis girls are forced into female stereotypes from birth and they suffer from internalized misoginy, or ironize their experience.

Dylan was Born and raised a male, and everything about their online persona Is a caricature of a woman. Their Song Is a mockery.

[shitty-goose-quack]

psa: you don't have to look a certain way to be enby

you don't have to wear oversized button downs and bagy jeans to "pass"

you don't have to wear intricate and colorful makeup so people know you're queer

you don't have to shave your head to look more androgynous

you don't have to bind everyday to prove that you're really trans, and not just faking

you don't have to use they/them or he/him or fae/faer pronouns to not be a girl

jesus christ i just want to go and shake 14 year old me and tell her she can wear dresses and miniskirts and bras if that makes her feel good

tell her that if wearing mascara threatens her carefully crafted gender identity, then its not a great gender identity

just because you came out as "genderfluid/enby/gender queer/agender/transman/demiboy/unlabelled", masculinity doesn't mean shit (neither does femininity for that matter) and if coming out makes you feel like you're in more of a box, coming out did not serve it's purpose

screw that teacher who asked "why are you wearing girl clothes?" because you came to school in something pink

screw the imposter syndrome you felt wearing a bra instead of a binder

screw the people that say you're misgendering yourself when you call yourself a girl

I can be just as trans in a miniskirt as i am in mens jeans

i can have a gender crisis with or without lipstick on

i can be a lesbian with french braids or a buzz cut

i can flip off gender with long, unkempt cuticles, or 2 inch acrylics

my gender expression is for me, and me alone. if someone with shaved legs, eyelash extensions, waist length hair, and a pushup bra asks you to use he/him pronouns for him, you had better damn well respect that

[star-is-cool]

it/its pronouns

people tell me my pronouns are de-humanizing.

however, darling, THATS THE POINT.

im not human, im a funky little alien that happened to land on earth. it didn't get birthed, I fucking spawned from chaos.

so no, you may not only use he/him for me.

dont be a pussy, use my damn pronouns.

[j4zz4lop3]

Where all my bros who are nonbinary not in the sense they're dysphoric being their agab or euphoric being androgynous and in the way that you have no feelings about gender whatsoever and feel detached from the whole thing. Like, I'm just vibing why you care. I don't wanna bind. These are my non-gendered boobs, thx. I don't wanna get a haircut. This is my genderlessly long hair. I've come to a point where fem and masc are just aesthetics to me, and I need to make an effort to acknowledge that someone has a gender.

[number1racoon]

no more cis, trans, and nonbinary. there is only boring, cool, and normal

[ashtastiic]

NORMALIZE FEMININE TRANS MEN

[nezu-mi]

they're definitely dating

[urfavuritedoll]

DOLLIE'S INTRO !!

Haiii!! >_< so uhh I'm Dollie! I have a BUTT TON of pronouns but my main ones are she/they/it/that/lu/<3! If you want the full list, don't be scared to ask! Gender and sexuality are irrelevant to me but i am feminine!! I will refer to myself as a guy, a girl, nonbinary, whatever floats my boat! ☆ ～('▽^人) call me whatever you want, idc!

Ssssoooo I am a system and technically the cohost, so i may talk about system/alter related things here! I WILL NOT talk about things I feel are personal such as alter count, other alters names, what type of dissociative disorder I have, ect ect! You are not entilted to information, remember thaaaat!!! (⁀ᗢ⁀)

I have autism and I suspect BPD, but I'm not reeeeeaaaally certain on that yet. I alsooo have some stuff like chronic pain, so I may or may not vent about that here!!! Who knows?? Not even I know yet! ☆*:.｡.o(≧▽≦)o.｡.:*☆

DO NOT INTERACT ..

- endogenic "systems" (you either aren't a system or you have trauma you don't know of!!!! This includes "mixed origin" or "trauma endo" or whatever tf you wanna label urself as)

- +30 / -14 (unless I interact first)

- anti age regression / pet regression

- people who fake claim based on ONE tiktok video / tumblr post

- ppl who just give me bad vibes!!!! I block freely!!!!!

PLEEEEEASE INTERACT ..

- other systems / neurodivergents (ALL types of neurodivergency)

- NSO, Madoka Magica, Steven Universe, DDLC, Heathers fans

- neopronoun / xenopronoun + xenogender users/hoarders

- otherkin, therian, nonhuman, alterhuman, ect ect

- former gacha / 2015-2018 creepypasta kids (or both!!!! Even better! :3)

[unavailableapple]

Funny how the same people who call me a pick-me for being a gender nonconforming woman also insist that they’re nonbinary because their identity is so much more rich and complex than ‘woman’ and women just can’t understand because they don’t have the fascinating inner lives that ~nonbinary~ people have.

[pretty-bi]

when i feel like a boy its always gonna be a “femme boy” way not a “straight guy way”

[iwasateenagebordigist]

God was supposed to make me transfem but he made me a cis bisexual and I think that's terrible