#garlic jam no scary
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#sad clown noises#my deep cut of the week I guess#uncle roger fear no man but chilli jam scare him#garlic jam no scary#coral island#coral island wakuu#wakuu#atmposts
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try garlic coffee its fun and intriguing 👍
i may not be able to open posts from my notes or messages or get more context on posts via looking at the notes, but at least i can make fucked up coffee properly now
#toy txt post#reblog#put garlic powder into the coffee grounds#actually FIRST: try having garlic bread with your coffee. if you like that you may like garlic coffee#if not youre a hater♡ (this is a joke. i suspect this is not a popular flavor combination and im a weird little freak here so by implying#its Weird to dislike the flavor combo im being funny)#anyway. this isn't cursed coffee but i do want to try espresso. but also i need to go to a cafe for that i think. bc i am not spending#espresso machine money to try something once. i understand now why they cost that much (its a scary pressure vessel.#that thang is a fucking Bomb. but also. i aint spending that much. certainly not before i try it lmao. so i need to find like a non busy#cafe with outdoor seating. also i like the grinder but my god it is Annoying af to clean. and im gonna have to OIL it eventually??? die#what a horrible needy little bitch of an appliance. fuck all the way off. god#i appreciate how much quieter it is to hand grind tho. the worst part about grinding is the fucking SOUND. god#do they make fucking blenders that are hand crank lmao?? like blenders for Actual Smoothies do not fucking mentioned the shaker bottles#do what you like but i am not drinking powders. i am jamming as much fruit into that thing as i can and making a drink thats barely not a#solid. i dont think those shaker bottles are built for that#also there may be an update on the way im using tumblr that fixes it so we'll see about that as well?
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I realized early today that this is my last Monday off until the end of the summer. I think I did a pretty good job enjoying it.
I slept pretty well last night. Getting up was a little hard but I would wake up around 9 and slowly got myself out of bed.
I could smell that James was making crepes downstairs. I was very excited about that. I got dressed in my new linen house dress that I love. And went downstairs to spend the day with my husband.
I was correct about the crepes. They were so nice. Sadly the jam did not set up correctly. So instead we have some lovely strawberry syrup. But it's still very good and was great for the crepes.
James would try bruleeing their crepes. And they smelled very nice. We would hang out on the couch and I would knit a little and I was really happy.
I would be in a silly mood today. It felt so nice to just not feel burdened. We decided we would go out to take James's bike to the bike store. Just to get out of the house for a bit. So I put my flip flops on and off we went.
But as soon as we went outside I saw that the man delivering our new trashcan was outside!!! No one has ever been so excited to see this man. He had excellent gold grills and was laughing at me when I was going "oh my gawd. Is it the day??? Is it here?? The greatest day!!" And then he had to take a picture of me with the van to prove we got it. I made James also take my picture because I thought it was very funny. Jess says I should use that as my professional headshot for my resume.
We drove over to fells point to go drop off James's bike. And after they checked that in we would walk over to the goodwill.
I was riffing and telling jokes about all of the things we saw. My favorite joke though was when we say a "del fest" (Delaware festival) sweatshirt and I said James should wear that when Del works at the museum and when they come in they rip off their shirt and are wearing the del fest sweatshirt under it and I think that would be hilarious.
I would get one shirt I think will be so cute for the renfair. And then two shelves. I had $4 in coupons so that was exciting.
We passed a subway and they have sides now. That are a foot long. A pretzel, a cookie, and a churro. Which I think they should sell as a pack call a "yard stick". I am hilarious.
We went home and I spent a lot of time just chilling in the couch being sleepy. I was also feeling really dehydrated today. I am trying very hard to be more hydrated in general. I think I did a good job today but I will continue to make that a goal.
James would install two of our new hardware lamps. One of them sadly would not work but that's okay. We will keep trying. I was very proud of James for doing a hard thing! Electrical is scary!
I would rest for a lot of the day. I would move to our bedroom and take a long rest. James came and laid with me. But eventually I would take a daytime bath. I laid in the cool bathtub for a long time. I washed my hair. I scrubbed my legs. It was nice.
I laid in bed while my hair dried. But then I got an email that our garden beds were delivered!! Amazing. We would gather ourselves and went to pick those up.
There was a weird amount of traffic but we got out to Glen Burnie and it was all good. There was some confusion in the pickup area but we got our things with only a little waiting. James went to get a cart to carry the boxes and we loaded up the car.
We drove over to mod pizza. We got there right before it got very busy so that was good. I got a salad but I didn't like the dressing. So me and James split that. And I got cheesey garlic bread and James got a pizza with tomatoes and basil. It was nice just being together.
I got very tired again. We are going to stop at the grocery store. But James said if I wasn't feeling right we should go home, that it wasn't a waste of a drive like I was worrying. They were being very sweet.
When we got home I got cozy on the couch. And was out. I spelt for such a long time. I was having very strong belly pain and the sleep helps but when I woke up at 730 I was feeling very unwell. Drinking water helped. But I was feeling weird.
Eventually James would get me a Popsicle and came upstairs with me to chill. We are hanging out in the AC now. I put some outfits together for the week. And I'm feeling. Tired. Ready to sleep again. Hopefully in the morning I will feel all normal again. I felt so good this morning so it is a little frustrating that I fell apart on the second half. I needed the rest apparently.
I hope you all sleep well tonight. Take care of eachother. Until tomorrow!
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Character Intro: Persephone (Kingdom of Ichor)
Nicknames- Persie by her friends
Sweet Pea by her mom
Age- 16 (immortal)
Location- Eleusis, Olympius
Personality- Persephone is a friendly and considerate girl. She’s always open to helping others. She is curious about the world outside of her small state. Her naivete is not mistaken for stupidity & she’s more than capable of standing up for herself, others, and what’s morally right. Persephone, at times, can become dark and melancholic, but that feeling goes away when she’s with her mom or friends.
She lives with her mom in the state of Eleusis on a sprawling estate that has a farm, several greenhouses, and a wheat field that seemingly goes on and on. Persephone calls it the “sea of wheat." She's under the impression that she and her mother are “gifted mortals." She has questioned in the past why her mom seemingly stopped physically aging past her 10th birthday.
Her & her mother Demeter are very close. She calls Demeter “My mom, my best friend, my sister, my everything."
Persephone helps out her mom sometimes with the Glory’s Crown hair care company. She swears by the rosemary mint curling gel.
Her favorite desserts are Toula's apple cinnamon cake, Iasion's coconut banana cake, and her mom's sweet potato pie.
She loves the La Petit Amour lip gloss in the shade "Posed in Prickly Pear."
She grows flowers the “mortal way," but is never shy in showcasing her abilities, especially around her friends. Currently, Persephone's abilities include chlorokinesis (manipulating plants/flowers), edafoskinesis (soil manipulation), and minor photokinesis. She eventually wants to be able to grow a fruit tree! When experiencing heightened emotions, symbolic flowers can sprout from her head!
At a perfume class a few weeks ago Persephone went to along with Liri and Toula, she made her own signature perfume- which contained notes of jasmine, lily, prickly pear, and lavender.
She loves participating in the state's annual Cornucopia celebration! Persephone & Liri make tea popsicles to sell them.
Persie, much like her mom, is vegan.
Her go-to drink is a banana oat milk smoothie. She also likes sparkling water, aloe vera juice, sweet tea, orange juice, iced hibiscus tea, ginger ale, & freshly brewed green tea. She absolutely hates coffee!
Persephone is quite crafty- she loves making flower earrings! She got into it after her & Iasion went to a blacksmithing class.
A guilty pleasure for her is a spicy black bean burger and sweet potato fries with a large iced green tea. She gets it from a poular vegan restaurant called Garden Gatherings. Persephone also doesn't mind an order of tofu nuggets (with garlic ginger dipping sauce) from Olympic Chef.
Some of her favorite treats are the honey & almond butter granola clusters, vanilla coconut soy ice cream, and dark chocolate sea salt baklava, which Iasion makes. Persephone also doesn’t mind slices of wheat toast topped with pomegranate jam.
In her free time, Persephone enjoys bike riding, writing in her journal, swimming in the nearby creek, checking out the farmer's market, sunbathing, listening to music, and hanging out with her friends while binge watching episodes of The Dynasty of the Vain and Powerful- the most "cringe-inducing, so bad it's good" dramatic interpretation of the Titans- soap opera. She also enjoys spending time with her mother- gardening, sunbathing, knitting, cooking, & yoga.
Her best friend is Liriope, an anthousai. When Demeter goes out of town on “business," she stays with Liri & her family. Persephone is also good friends with Toula, a dryad that works for her mom as an intern. There's also Cyane, an old childhood friend of hers who recently moved away. They sometimes keep in touch through texting.
Persephone absolutely hates scary movies!
She was one of the few students at her high school that didn't opt for switching or transferring out the Underworld Studies class.
After graduating high school, Persephone’s currently taking some classes at the small agricultural college that her mom founded.
Some of her favorite meals include her mom's green bean casserole, Iasion's sweet potato curry with brown rice, and Liri's black bean & sweet potato quesadillas.
Persephone has been suffering from dark & twisted nightmares for a couple months. A constant image she sees is of herself being consumed by black hellfire and Demeter watching helplessly, crying and screaming. She has only confided in Liri about this.
“People are a lot like flowers. There's always more buried underneath."
#my oc#oc character#my character#my oc character#persephone#hades and persephone#oc intro#character intro#oc introduction#character introduction#modern greek gods#modern greek mythology#greek myth retellings#greek goddess#greek goddesses#greek mythology#greek pantheon#greek myths
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another cruel thing about being an ana girl is that eating certain foods is scary and repulsive to you get when you want to binge you crave them. So as an act of transparency i thought id share a list of everything that i am currently craving, but wont eat.
chinese chicken salad (drenched in sauce)
Vanilla oat shaken espresso from Starbucks
sausage roll/pork pie
Percy pigs
egg sandwiches (the kind made with garlic cream cheese)
peanut butter & jam sandwiches on toasted white processed bread
dominos pizza
KFC...!!!!!
fish food ice cream
kinder Bueno
milkshakes
five guys grilled cheese and a large fries
McDonalds BBQ chicken wrap
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Mr. Sun, Sun, Mr. Golden Sun [One-shot]
Summary: The past is never where you leave it.
Warnings: Some fluff. A bit of angst. Protective Bucky
A/N: I’ve had a lot of you ask about Dot and if she ever comes back (What would happen, how would they react and this has always been the way I saw it in my head). This takes place roughly 5 months after the epilogue. If you have not read it THERE WLL BE MAJOR SPOILERS. Some angst but also sweet Bucky and lots of fluff between Ori and Beck.
Catch up on the series here!
***My fics are not to be saved or posted on any other sites without my written permission. Reblogs are my jam though! Thanks!*
Wednesday is Y/n’s longest day and lately, she is having trouble making it till closing. Thankfully, she has two very loving worrywarts who decided that Wednesdays would be a family day at the bookstore. Bucky picks up Ori from school and from there they head to the bookstore where they order takeout and the two worriers help take some of the workload off her shoulders. They handled restocking the shelves, inventory if needed and Bucky usually had her in the back office on the couch by seven while he cleaned up and closed down.
It was currently just shy of five so they should be barreling through the door any minute and couldn’t come at a better time. They weren’t busy by any means, just one customer that’s been browsing the shelves for thirty minutes but her feet are killing her and she wants nothing more than to her two favorite people.
“Hi, I’m sorry to bother you,” A soft feminine voice grabs your attention and you look up from your computer. “This was in that large red chair in the back of the store. I wasn’t sure if someone left it behind or…”
The dark-haired woman held up a drawing of constellations and flowers floating all together and a galaxy printed marker case. Y/n knew just who that belongs to and it certainly wasn’t lost -- those markers knew they were home. She grins and takes the piece of cream-colored construction paper from the woman’s hand and the bag of markers, setting them on the shelves under the cash register.
“I’m sorry about that. That’s my daughter’s favorite spot in the shop. She likes to sit there and read when she comes in and as you can see, color.”
The woman laughs and rubs a hand over her stomach. "I guess I better get used to finding markers in my couch cushions. When are you due?" She nods towards Y/n’s very obvious baby bump. Y/n smiles down at her belly, placing both her hands protectively over her bump and she looks back up at the woman with a glowing smile.
"February, 26th but I have a feeling they will be early. What about you?”
"April 10th. It goes by a lot faster than you would think, doesn’t it?”
The bell on the front door rings before Y/n could answer and a blur of curly hair rushes through the shelves and right into the back office where the owner of all those curls deposits her backpack with a huff and the arm full of books she was carrying hit the desk with a resounding thwap.
“Mama, daddy said I can order pizza for dinner. Is that okay?” Ori shouted from behind the glass window separating them.
Y/n smiles at the stranger and sighs fondly. “That would be the owner of the markers. Excuse me just a second.”
She walks over (more like waddles) and stands in the doorway so she can keep a watch on the floor and still see her daughter’s sweet face. “Of course, starlight. Yes, you can call and you don’t have to ask. You know where the menu is. My phone is in the locked drawer upfront. Just make sure you get two cheese pizzas and the extra cheesy garlic knots.”
“Okay!” Ori beams up at her and adds, “and brownies?”
Y/n laughs as Ori skips out of the office and over to the front desk with the key in hand. She climbs up onto the stool that’s in front of the computer and unlocks the drawer that holds Y/n’s phone, purse and keys while she’s working in the store alone. Y/n follows behind her and brushes her curls out of her face so she can place a kiss to her forehead.
“Yeah, brownies are fine and you left this in your chair?" Y/n raises her knee, letting them bump into the drawing and her box of markers.
Ori grimaces but is still smiling because she's rarely in trouble for anything and most certainly would never be in trouble for anything as silly as leaving her drawing laying around the bookstore.
"Sorry. I meant to hang it up next to daddy's calendar so you can look at it all the time.”
"It's alright, starlight. Just try to remember next time. You would be upset if someone took one of your masterpieces by mistake and I don’t want you upset.” She tickles Ori’s side, making her giggle and asks her daughter, “ Speaking of daddy. Where is he at?"
"Outside on the phone with Uncle Stevie about work or maybe baby Oliver. He said Uncle Stevie needs to stop whining because Uncle Sammy doesn’t find that cute anymore now that they are married and have a baby.”
Y/n snorts and the woman that was talking to her a few minutes earlier is standing behind the register unable to control her own giggling. Ori blushes at being caught by a customer and looks up at her mother who nods, letting her know it’s okay and she skips off back to the office to call for pizza, Y/n’s phone in hand.
"She's adorable." The woman says as she sets the books down on the counter and Y/n grins in response. She grabs each book from the small stack she picked out and starts to scan each book, placing them into the new paper bags Ori helped her pick out.
"Yes, she is. She really is the greatest kid and thank you."
Y/n starts to notice a trend with her purchase. Each book is about parenting. She has Birth Without Fear, Becoming the Parent You Want to Be, The Motherly Guide to Becoming a Mama and a few others. Normally, Y/n would just scan books and not say a word. It isn’t her business what her customers are buying and she never wants to make anyone feel uncomfortable. Maybe it is the pregnancy but her heart hurts for her. This woman is obviously scared about motherhood and her ability to be a good mother.
“It’s seventy-three even. You can insert your card there.” She chews her bottom lip and holds out the bag. “I know it’s not my place and believe me I know how scary this all is but once you see their face it will ease all those worries. You won’t have loved anything as much as that little baby. You’ll find your way. Don’t worry.”
The woman takes the bag and gives her a weak smile as she takes her receipt. There is something in her eyes that Y/n can’t quite place but she simply says thank you and heads for the door. Ori skips back out back of the office and hands Y/n her phone.
“Done mama!”
Y/n tears her eyes from the empty sales floor and looks at her daughter. She wraps her arm around her and kisses her cheek. “Thank you, starlight. You know your daddy and I love you very much, right?”
Ori responds with a beaming smile and nods. “Yep, you love me best and most in the whole world. Bigger than the whole universe?”
“Yeah, bigger than the universe and brighter than the sun, starlight.”
--------
Bucky groans, loudly. “Steve. I can’t keep having this conversation with you. Bring Oliver over tomorrow and you can take Sam out. I think it will be okay. I have a kid you remember? I even took care of her when she was a baby. Plus, Beck will be there.”
The front door bell chimes and that’s Bucky's last straw. He’s wasted enough time talking to Steve about date night with Sam. Bucky needs to kiss his girl, say hi to his babies before he loses his friggin�� mind!
“I’m hanging up, punk. I haven’t seen my girl yet and you’re keeping me from pizza and talking to my babies. Oh, good, God. Shut it. You just whined about missing your husband for twenty minutes and you’re going to rag on me? I don’t think so, pal. Bring Oliver by tomorrow night around seven. Later, Stevie.”
Bucky’s cheeks are still bright red when he turns around to see Dot standing behind him, swollen belly and a bag full of books from his fiance’s bookstore. He peeks through the window at his girls laughing at the front counter and he knows that Dot met his baby, his Orion and he wasn’t there when it happened. Even if Dot didn’t know she did, she still did and bucky felt his chest twist and stomach clench.
He wasn’t there.
“James…” She closes her eyes and mutters, “Uncle Stevie and Uncle Sammy.”
Bucky doesn’t answer her. He doesn’t even look at her, he walks right past her and heads towards the store. He isn’t going to do this in the street and not with his daughter so close. She isn’t going to learn who Dot is this way.
“Wait--” Dot steps towards the shop door and Bucky steps in front of her, blocking her path. “Is that... My--”
“No.” Bucky is quick to shut that down, gesturing between him and Y/n through a large picture window at the front of the store. He makes sure things are very clear when it comes to Ori and tells her, “She’s our daughter, not yours. You walked out on her before she was three days old, she was never your daughter.”
They stand there, staring at each other. No says a word and no one dares to move. Bucky would love to go inside and shield his girls from whatever this woman is trying to bring into their lives but he stays put, firm and standing his ground. The awkward silence fills the busy sidewalk out front of the shop and after several minutes of agony finally Bucky can’t take it any longer. He has to know what she wants from him and what she wants from his baby girl.
“What is it?”
“What…” Her brows pinch together and she shakes her head. “What is what?”
“What do you want, Dot?” Bucky clarified. He wasn’t yelling, he would never yell at a woman but his tone was as far as friendly as you could get. “If you think you can come back here after nearly seven years and take my daughter from me--”
“I didn’t come here to try to take her Bucky! Jesus,” She blows out a breath and glances back at the girls through the display window. “I didn’t know this is your… wife’s store. I didn’t even know you had gotten married. I was out for a walk after meeting my parents for lunch and I saw the display in the window so I came in. I wasn’t looking for you or for her--”
Bucky digs his teeth into his bottom to keep down the harsh words that were threatening to crawl up his throat. Of course, she wasn’t looking for Ori. She’s never wanted anything to do with Ori and that was probably for the best. He didn’t bother correcting her about Y/n. They were going to be married soon enough and he didn’t want Dot having any more information about his family in case she suddenly got it in her head that she wants to know Ori. He looks down at her swollen stomach and something in his stomach burns. She didn’t want Ori but she’s out buying baby books for this baby? What makes this baby more deserving than his little girl? He hopes Ori doesn’t know any of that or put any of this together on her own. He would have no idea how to repair her heart from that kind of hurt.
His Beck would know. She would know how to fix it and would make everything okay because she loves Ori more than she loves him and that’s one of the reasons he fell in love with her.
“Good. That’s good. Because she has a mom, you know? One that loves her unconditionally and for the record, you’re the one that’s missing out. Not me and definitely not Ori. You’re missing out on an amazing kid and that’s all on you.”
He wanted his words to hurt her more. He wanted her to be upset and regretful for missing out on Ori’s life but she wasn’t. She was hurt by this confrontation and maybe having to hear all of this from him directly but she wasn’t upset about losing Ori.
“James, I was young and stupid. I’m sorry I left that way but… I never felt that connection you felt. You held her and I could see it in your face, you loved her with all of you. I wanted to feel that so badly and I thought after I held her and things would be different but… they weren’t. It’s not like either of us wanted a baby when I got pregnant. You might hate me for leaving and maybe she does too but it was the right decision. She should have a mother who loves her.”
Bucky looks back into the shop and his girls had moved to Ori’s chair (probably Ori’s doing to keep Beck off her feet). Ori is snuggled into Y/n’s side with her head resting on Y/n’s stomach reading The Magic School Bus (with Y/n’s help here and there) to the twins while Y/n plays with her hair. He had no idea how Dot could look at that little girl and not have her heart bursting. He didn’t want to admit it to himself or to Dot but she is right. Ori deserves to have a mother who loves her and he’s so grateful she has one of the best.
“Maybe you’re right or maybe you would have been a good mom. We won’t know because you bolted before we could find out.”
Bucky turns around to head inside but stops abruptly. He spins back around and he looks down at her baby bump one last time. He shakes his he and meets her eyes. “Don’t come back here. Stay away from my daughter and my family. Hopefully this family is one worth sticking around for.”
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The doorbell chimes through the quiet of the fairly empty store making Y/n sigh. She is so tired and all she wants is her fiance. Y/n looks up to greet whoever came in looking for their next adventure, but to her surprise, it is her fiance. He is wearing a tired smile but he’s smiling brighter the closer he gets to the front desk. Her brows pull together as she glances at the time on the computer. Bucky has been outside talking to Steve for over forty minutes.
That was highly unusual. Bucky was so good about focusing on her and Ori. Once they were all together his phone was down and he only picked up if it was an emergency or had to do with work.
“Well, hello there handsome.”
“Hi, beautiful.” Bucky rumbles as he leans over the counter to peck her lips. “How was today? Have you been on your feet all day?” He asks, brows raised and disappointment seeping into this voice.
“Bucky, I have to work.” She scolds, chuckling softly as she does. Before he can argue she is already making her way around to get a proper kiss, which Bucky gives without hesitation.
“Please, go sit down. For me? I’ll finish inventory and look at that stack of resumes on the counter you have been avoiding even though you said you were going to hire help months ago. When Leopold and Lobe get here things are only going to get crazier. We need to find help now.”
“Those are not the babies' names and I hate interviewing people.” She grumbles with a pout and leans into Bucky’s arms, sighing heavily after he wraps his arms around her letting some of that extra baby weight fall onto Bucky and she quickly realizes how tired she really is.
“I missed you both a lot today and I’m so tired. Just exhausted really and I’m so ready to go home.” She whispers into Bucky’s neck and his arms tighten around her, swaying her back and forth to try and soothe her as best he can in the middle of the store. He wants to tell her to close up early and bring the resumes home so he can call a few to set up interviews but he can’t muster up the words -- he’s frozen.
All because of his past decided to walk back into his life today. The walk he took after Dot left did nothing to help clear his mind or ease the worry that she is going to come back and try to take his baby girl away. He wants to ask what happened when Dot was there with them. He needs to know what she said to Ori and his soon-to-be wife but he doesn’t want to say the words. Y/n is already tired and hurting from being on her feet all day, he won’t overwhelm her with a woman that doesn’t matter.
“Bucky?”
His arms tighten around her as if she is in some sort of trouble and presses a kiss to her forehead. “Yeah? What’s the matter, baby?”
She pulls back and arches her brow. As if she doesn’t know when something is wrong with him and the look on her face says just that. That look finally gets a smile out of the man. “I’m not sure what is wrong but I know something isn’t right. So, how about you tell me what’s wrong, hm?”
Bucky sighs and makes sure Ori is out of earshot in Y/n’s office, she is. She is doing her homework with that bright smile he adores so much. She is humming Mr. Sun, Sun, Mr. Golden Sun and letting her feet sway back and forth. Het adores seeing her like that. Happy and content and Beck is to thank for most of that happiness the last two years.
“I’ll tell you about it tonight, but everything is going to be fine. Just a long, long day. Whaddya say after pizza and homework we close up early and go home? I’ll start calling some of those resumes for you and I’m going to have Nat come help you at the store until we hire someone.”
Y/n eyes him for a second longer and then nods her agreement. She’s too tired to fight him tonight and she isn’t going to pass up Bucky handling the interviews. She presses a quick kiss to his lips and whispers against them, “Are you sure you’re okay?”
“Of course, I’m okay. I’ve got my girls and babies on the way. Everything is just the way it’s supposed to be.”
#bucky barnes x reader#Bucky Barnes x you#bucky barnes x y/n#fireman!Bucky#bucky x you#bucky x reader#bucky x yn#Firefighter AU#no longer single dad AU#alternate universe
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RP Meme from Netflix's "A Series of Unfortunate Events: A Bad Beginning: Part One"
If you are interested in stories with happy endings, then you would be better off somewhere else.
In this story, not only is there no happy ending, there is no happy beginning and very few happy things in the middle.
I'm sorry to tell you this, but that's how the story goes.
Aren't you going to the Festive Fun Fair, with all the jolly rides and games and snacks?
It's gray and cloudy.
Let's get to work!
Can you show me what the specific issues are?
That'd be disappointing, I made them myself.
Of course, we still need the right projectile.
Maybe it makes more sense in the original French.
Could you find a rock that's not sandstone?
I'm curious to see if I can skip the rock as far with my left as I can with my right.
I don't mean to criticize, but standard scientific method calls for stable systematics.
Who's that mysterious figure?
It only seems scary because of all the mist.
If you have ever lost somebody very important to you, then you already know how it feels.
Nobody asked you.
The front page! Some people wait a lifetime for that.
That's gonna make a wonderful headline.
I remember how I was when I was your age.
Although I don't know who I think I'm kidding, because I have no inventive or mechanical skill whatsoever.
How lucky am I to have such unusual children in my life?
Please, come in, and mind you wipe your feet on the mat so you don't track in any mud.
Actually, I'm about to be rather wealthy.
Well, welcome to my humble home.
It does seem to need a little work.
I hope you'll be happy here.
I'll still check in on you occasionally.
It looks like a list.
Did you help around the house?
This is the kitchen, where you may help yourselves to meals.
I expect you to keep everything gleamingly clean.
The stove is a bit like a servant. You have to whack it sometimes to get it to work.
This is where I do all my reading.
I don't use the ballroom at all.
You'll have to redo the floors.
It has all the usual amenities, though the management regrets to inform you that the shampoo is not tear-free. If anything, it encourages tears.
Rats bite.
Out of all the numerous bedrooms in this enormous mansion, I have chose this one for your safety and comfort.
There's only one bed.
As you can see, I have provided, at no cost to you, this complimentary pile of rocks. Thoughts?
First of all, first impressions are often wrong.
Your first impression of me may be that I am a terrible person.
A tattoo is just a decorative pigment on skin. It's not a sign of a wicked person.
It's a mistake. It'll get sorted out.
There's a village in the Pacific Islands suspended on ropes above an active volcano.
Stay here. And not a peep.
You've done something different to your hair?
May I come in?
Is this about the children?
I apologize for the noise.
I told them to cry using their inside voices.
I'm not supposed to talk about it, but I can tell you that it involved an illegal use of someone's credit card and a poisonous plant.
Let me tell you, those children are monsters.
I live alone.
Wait here, for your own safety.
You missed a spot.
I never wanna use a toothbrush again.
Why aren't you cleaning?
Plan the menu, purchase the ingredients, prepare the food, set the table, serve dinner, clean up afterward, and stay out of our way.
It's a little greasy.
Money. Hard-earned money. The most important substance on earth besides applause and lip balm.
That was dismaying.
I wasn't expecting to see you.
It's mostly law books, but there are sections on everything from Italian cuisine to the world's most threatening fungus.
Do you have a paper and pencil to take notes?
These books look promising.
All we have to do is sauté garlics and onions in a pot, and then add olives, capers, anchovies, diced parsley and tomatoes to simmer.
Looked broken, but I think I can fix it.
What do we have here?
Is there a supermarket nearby?
I had dreams of becoming an actress, you know.
Who else has such robust good looks in such a large amount?
I'm handsome and I'm talented and love your bank account!
Oh, my God, what a very handsome knave.
Unbelievable good looks and brains and heart!
I'm very very smart
And as anyone in the theater knows, after a grand entrance, the audience is supposed to applaud.
All of the artistic and financial aspects of my career are finally coming together like two pieces of a bread in the middle of a sandwich.
I don't have time to learn a second language besides whatever it is I'm speaking right now.
You know, every time she talks, it's like the tines of a fork are being jammed into my eye
You've seen them perform. Would you call them actors?
Better than nothing.
Wow, that was quick.
Where's the roast beef?
You didn't tell us you wanted roast beef.
You can't go easy on children. They need to be taught to obey their elders.
That's what happens with wealthy kids. Money is really a corrupting influence.
You're a pretty little one.
This table is a mess.
There's hardly a place to put down a baby.
There are many, many things that are better than nothing.
Trouble and strife can cover this world like the dark of night, or like smoke from a suspicious fire.
I'm worried about the children.
We need to get to them.
We need to get out of here first.
The rat is noisy.
#rp memes#rp meme#rp starters#roleplay memes#roleplay meme#roleplay starters#a series of unfortunate events
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My Brother the Vampire: Fangtastic
Updates will be reblogs tbh
Summary: Patton is a vegetarian. Virgil is a vampire. And they're twins?!
Ever since Patton Abbott discovered that his long lost twin brother, Virgil Vega is a vampire, he's been soaking up everything Virgil will tell him about Franklin Grove's vampire community. It's all top secret, and Patton's sworn that he'll never tell another soul. But now, nosy tabloid reporter Serena Star is snooping around. As she gets closer and closer to the truth, it's up to Virgil and Patton to throw her off track. This is one fangtastic news story that can't get out!
Virgil Vega trudged sleepily into the breakfast room already dressed for school. He had on a black ripped skinny jeans, a violet long sleeved shirt underneath a black short sleeved shirt that had a quote from one of Edgar Allen Poe’s face on it with his thick combat boots. He had a black Panic! At The Disco necklace that had the symbol from the music video LA Devotee accompanied with his green emerald necklace. He slid into his chair, and rested his head on his palms wishing for more sleep. Mondays were just so boring.
"Good morning, sleepybones," his father, Declan Vega said, placing a plate next to his head.
"Shh," Virgil murmured, his eyes closed, "I like quietness before eating."
"It's your favorite," his father coaxed gently. "Blood sausages with scrambled eggs and toast with some Crofters jam on it as well as bacon," he says smiling.
Virgil peered at the place and giggles as it was plated to look like a smiley face. The blood sausages semi dripping of blood since it was semi raw like he liked it. "Thanks," he mumbled softly.
His father, already dressed for work in black chinos and a black pin-striped shirt with French cuffs and a yellow bowtie, sipped his tea and picked up the remote control. "There is nothing better than lazy morning shows as on Mondays," he said smiling.
He flipped through the weather and some talk shows before settling on The Morning Star.
"Oh god please no," Virgil protested, "just looking at Serena Star's smile gives me sunburn gives my skin the hives."
Serena Star, WowTV's best celebrity reporter, had impossibly bright, bleached blond hair and eyes that looked as if they'd been surgically enhanced to be permanently wide open in either adoration or shock. Lately she'd been trying to cast herself as a serious journalist on her own morning news show, The Morning Star. Just the other day, Virgil had turned the TV off in exasperation after Serena had said, "Tell me, Mr. Senator, how does it feel to have a law named after you?"
This morning, Serena Star was standing with her back to a small crowd of people, talking into her microphone. She was wearing a tiny blue suede miniskirt under a knee-length trench coat, and the look in her wide eyes said "shock!" She was in what seemed to be a graveyard. A scruffy, black-clad teenager stood beside her...
Declan flipped the channel.
"Turn it back!" Virgil blurted.
"But you said-"
"I know. Turn it back!" he repeated.
Virgil could not believe his eyes in what he was seeing. The boy standing next to Serena Star was none other than Garrick Stephens, one of the lamest vampires at school. He and his bonehead friends, which everyone called them the Beasts, were always pulling dumb stunts, like seeing which one of them could eat the most garlic croutons without getting seriously ill. They weren't nearly as scary as they smelled, but they'd been annoying since forever. It didn't help that whenever Virgil brought his food that had garlic they'd make a show of gagging in the cafeteria.
Virgil frowns and begins to eat his breakfast while watching the news wondering why Garrick was on the news.
"Oh dear I do believe that's the local cemetery," his dad said.
Virgil realized he was right, meaning that this was being filmed less than five blocks from their home.
The camera panned over to an empty grave, and Virgil's dad turned up the volume.
"....yesterday's small town funeral went horribly wrong," Serena Star was saying off screen.
"Local deceased man, Mr. Alan Koontz, was scheduled for burial here at the Franklin Grove Memorial Cemetery. As Mr. Koontz was being lowered into the ground, eyewitnesses say that his casket creaked open." The camera zoomed in on a shiny midnight-blue coffin lying open next to the grave. "In a bizarre turn of events, out climbed an allegedly live person!" Serena continued. "Mr. Koontz's widow immediately fainted and was rushed to Franklin Grove General Hospital for treatment after the event occured."
Serena Star's frowning face reappeared on the screen, "friends of the family say that the person who emerged bore no resemblance to Mr. Koontz and was, in fact, a teenage boy."
The camera pulled back to reveal Garrick, who was licking his palm and then using it to slick back his greasy gross hair.
Virgil was frowning now too, since Garrick and his friends didn't know the meaning of the word "discreet." They probably couldn't even spell it. Ever since they were little kids, Virgil had always been amazed and dumbfounded at how close the Beasts routinely came to breaking the First Law of the Night.
Which was that vampires are never supposed to reveal their true selves to an outsider.
Thinking about that made Virgil feel uncomfortable. After all, he'd recently broken the First Law himself. But who could really blame him? He'd had no choice, though, he couldn't possibly keep the fact that he was a vampire secret from his identical twin, Patton, even if Patton himself was human. Didn’t help that Patton had seen Virgil’s palm heal from when he fell onto the thorn bush in his backyard.
The two had met once Patton arrived to school and after one day they realized the truth of them being twins. Which was a shocker to the two of them.
Virgil sighs, he may have broken the rule, but at least it wasn't on national TV.
Serena Star looked squarely at the camera. "I, Serena Star, now bring you an exclusive interview with the thirteen year old boy who was almost buried alive. I think you'll agree it's a story that's truly... INDEADIBLE!" A graphic with the word "INDEADIBLE!" materialized on the screen over Garrick's head, and Virgil rolled his eyes. Serena was always making up lame words for her on-screen headlines.
"Awesome!" Garrick Stephens grinned.
Virgil's head began to ache because how in the underworld, were they going to cover up a vampire popping out of a coffin in the middle of a funeral?
"Mr. Stephens...." Serena Star turned to face her subject, "... how do you feel?"
"I feel great!" Garrick said with a small shrug.
"Amazing!" Serena commented, with a slight frown. She had clearly been expecting Garrick to be upset. "How long were you in that coffin?"
"Like seven, eight hours I think. I really can't say."
"That must have been very unsettling," Serena Star prompted sympathetically.
"Only when those pallbearer guys carried it around and woke me up," Garrick said, shooting a peeved look off camera.
"Are you saying you were asleep in there?" asked Serena Star, her wide eyes widening even further.
"Yeah," Garrick answered before raising an eyebrow, "what would I be doing in there for... 8 hours? I woke up once I felt the casket being moved."
Virgil winced as Serena Star shook her head in disbelief. "You almost sound like you enjoyed yourself."
Garrick shrugged.
"Mr. Stephens," Serena Star said, a hint of disapproval in her voice, "what kind of person sleeps in a coffin?"
"It wasn't my idea." Garrick shrugged.
"Oh?" said Serena Star. "Whose idea was it?"
Garrick was about to answer, but then he seemed to think better of it. He then crossed his arms tilting his head, "you know that one episode of Mike and Molly where Molly was at her sister's job at the morge and they got high and got in the casket? That happened except for the weed and morgue part."
"Are you saying that you were just goofing around?" Serena Star asked with a slight frown as if she had became uninterested.
"Yep," Garrick replied, wrinkling his nose and scratching chin which Virgil and any other vampire in town knew he was lying since that was his social tick that showed he was lying.
"You mean..."
"I was messing around with my fellow kings of Franklin Grove Middle School!" Garrick cried out smirking and wildly waving, "yo, Kyle, Ricky, Dylan! I'm on TV!"
'What a moron,' Virgil thought.
"What exactly did your friends have in mind?" Serena Star probed.
"It looked comfortable so I climbed in," Garrick explained, his eyes glinting mischievously. "That's why I did it."
Virgil sighs knowing he was throwing a lame reason why he did it to avoid revealing any vampire secrets.
Like the fact that they slept in coffins. Still, it was a pretty semi lame alibi, especially because he kept going on about how it was really comfortable. At least he wasn't saying how it was the best sleep ever.
"The Interna 3 is a pretty comfortable casket," he said shrugging before leaning towards the microphone. "When they say `rest in peace,' they mean it!"
"Mr. Stephens, please," Serena interrupted. "That still doesn't explain how you ended up at Mr. Koontz's funeral."
"Uh... simple. The funeral home got the coffins mixed up. Did you know the Interna 3 is the best comfortable coffin?"
Serena Star yanked the microphone away, "are we to believe that this was really just an innocent student messing?" she said to Garrick, who shrugged again looking away in boredom.
"Or," she continued, turning slowly to the camera, "is there something more sinister at work?"
"She's looking for blood," Virgil mumbles softly.
"Clearly, a gruesome obsession with death," Serena went on as the camera zoomed in for a close-up of her shocked face, "nearly cost this misguided young misfit his life!"
"Who are you calling misguided?" Garrick's voice whined offscreen.
"And he isn't alone," Serena said, ignoring Garrick. "One look around this sleepy town reveals a dark obsession consuming the minds of its children." The live feed cut briefly to footage of the mall, showing a group of Goth sixth-graders.
"Are the youth of America next?" Serena asked ominously, as she reappeared on-screen. Then she frowned with determination, "I, Serena Star, will not rest until I find out the evil truth behind what's happening here."
Virgil grimaces knowing what comes next.
"Because the Star of truth must shine!" Serena Star declared dramatically, pumping her micro- phone in the air. It really was the worst journalis- tic sign-off Ivy had ever heard. "This is Serena Star. Wake up, America!"
A commercial came on, Declan shut off the TV. He turned around to look at his son and points to him, "you must promise me," he said, "that if you are ever on television, you will make a better impression than that boy Garrick Stephens."
"It's not funny, Dad," Virgil said with a frown on his pale face. "If Serena Star starts seriously investigating Goths in Franklin Grove, you know what she might find. What if she scoops the existence of vampires? None of us will ever be safe again!" Virgil rambles on as he began to quickly hyperventilate.
His father put down his tea quickly before helping his son calm down before he had an anxiety attack. "Virgil," he began to say gently, "we are talking about a woman best known for her special expose on the footwear of the rich and famous! I very much doubt she's capable of finding any real proof. Besides, the moment there's always bound to be a new bit of Hollywood gossip, Serena Star will forget all about Franklin Grove."
Virgil sighed once he had finally calmed down, "I hope you're right," he said, standing up to take his plate to the kitchen, "because if not, it's going to be really hard to get blood sausages around here."
-----
As they pulled up in front of Franklin Grove Middle School on Monday morning, Patton Abbott was applying his light pink lipstick in the visor mirror when he heard his papa gasp. He frowns and flipped up the visor to see the front steps of the school packed with people and a string of TV news vans lining the curb.
"Holy moly," Patton said breathlessly.
Remy Abbott, Patton's papa, double-parked and started to get out of the car as curiosity hit him.
Patton’s eyes widened before he quickly got out of the car and rushed to block Remy from opening the door further grabbed his papa's arm and squeaks out, "where are you going?"
"I want to see what all the commotion's about," his papa replied as he pulled down his sunglasses.
Patton immediately shook his head, "you can't come with me into school."
"Why not?" Remy asked with a pout.
"Because I'm in eighth grade," Patton explained with a frown.
Patton's papa smiled and shook his head and sighs before pouting, "well, okay," he said with a sigh.
"It's not you," Patton reassured him, "It's all parents. It's like a rule. I'll call you," Patton said reassuringly before he pecked his papa on the cheek, climbed out of the car, and squeezed between two news vans.
Patton frowns and walked towards the steps, careful to not step on any of the crews things. He looked up and noticed the bounce of soft blonde curls.
"Camilla!" he called out and his only human friend, Camilla Edmundson, turned around waved at him.
Patton made his way over to her and Camilla smiled, "hey. This is so wild," she said gesturing to the whole scene.
Patton frowns, "did something happen?"
Camilla raised an eyebrow before telling him about what had happened and dread slowly filled his stomach as he realized what Serena may stumble upon if she investigated.
Boy did he hope vampires were fiction, but nope! They were real and his twin, which he was still surprised about really I mean an identical twin! His own twin brother was a vampire as well! It just basically made them much more completely opposite yet identical twins.
Virgil had broken the first rule of Vampiredom, which was to never tell am outsider the secret.
And now Serena Star was here because of a stupid stunt Garrick Stephens did? Patton really wanted to yell at the stupid boy. For his brother's sake.
He really should look for Virgil.
"Come on let's go inside."
As he and Camilla moved the the crowd so as to make their way to the front doors of the school when he hears it. He heard a familiar high-pitched voice call out his name. He tried to ignore it and keep walking, but the voice shrieked even louder, "PATTON!"
Patton winced and told Camilla to go on without him before he reluctantly turned to see Charlotte Brown, his cheerleading captain, who was gesturing for Patton to join her in a circle of cameras.
Ever since Patton, with Virgil doing try outs for him, had made the squad a few weeks ago, Charlotte had acted as if she had forgotten that she'd tried to sabotage Patton, who was actually Virgil at tryouts. As well as if forgetting that Virgil, who was disguised as his twin, had caused her to be late to try outs and stole her role of Cheer Captain. Which must have soured her mood even though Patton turned down the role. In fact, Charlotte and her friends Katie and Allison all treated Patton like he was their BFF.
'At least it keeps the squad cheering as a team,' Patton thought to himself as he made his way over to the three girls.
"Tell them, Patton!" Charlotte said, grabbing his arm and pulling him in front of the cameras. "You know... what it's like as a new student here. How frightening it is with all the bad influences around this school."
Patton frowns before shaking his head quickly before yelping as a reporter in a rumpled suit stuck a microphone in front of Patton's face. "Have you ever slept in a coffin?"
"No," Patton said after blinking in confusion.
A woman holding a tape recorder asked, "Are you familiar with a street gang known as the Beasts?"
“...Street Gang is such a such a strong word for them,” Patton said raising an eyebrow remembering how Virgil had described them to him.
A short, determined looking woman in a tight, bright orange suit muscled in between the others, her blond hair shining in the sun. Patton’s eyes widened and he softly gasped. It was Serena Star herself! She looked much shorter than she did on TV.
"Have you ever..." Serena Star said, thrusting her microphone under Patton's chin, "... felt threatened by everyone around you wearing black?"
"Uh... not really since both my papa and pops wear almost all black. Since when is there anything wrong with wearing black?" Patton asked raising an eyebrow. He didn’t notice the looks Charlotte gave her friends.
Charlotte quickly leaped in front of him and nods hurriedly causing her blonde hair to bounce, "yes, Ms. Star, I totally have!" she cried, clearly overexcited to be talking to a celebrity reporter like Serena. "Once," she said, flipping her hair dramatically, "I was in the girls' bathroom, re-applying gloss, when two Goth girls came in. They were dressed from head to toe in black rags, and their nails were covered in black nail polish. And guess what they did. They growled at me!"
"Growled at you?" Serena Star repeated with wide eyes.
"Absolutely," Charlotte nodded seriously. "I was so scared I ran out without even doing my mascara!"
“You had a perm last year and you looked like a poodle,” a student pops up beside Serena said in the microphone. A girl steps beside them and smirked, “that growl was more of a bark dumbass,” both giggled as they rushed up the steps cackling as Charlotte gave them a glare before looking back at Serena with a strained smile.
"So you think it's a problem," Serena Star pressed, "that so many Franklin Grove students are obsessed with darkness?"
"Totally!" Charlotte agreed, "black is so last season." She gestured toward Serena Star's turquoise stiletto heels. "I absolutely love your shoes, by the way. Are they from Hollywood?"
Patton sighs, but takes the moment to sneak away and make his way inside the building so he can find Virgil.
As he walked down the hallway he saw Virgil with his new boyfriend, Logan Daniels, who surprisingly has yet to have noticed how identical Patton and Virgil looked. Virgil was playing with his emerald ring that was attached to the necklace that he had around his neck.
The same ring identical to Patton’s that helped the two realize who they were and the only things from their birth parents.
“See you later,” Logan said with a smile before giving Virgil a kiss on his forehead to which caused Virgil to blush a light pink.
Virgil twirled the emerald ring on the chain around his neck, "okay," he said softly with a shy smile. His brother was so smitten. Patton thought it was super cute.
As Patton waited for Logan to leave he yelps as his shoulder was lightly gripped and looked to see that Roman was dragging him towards his brother. Virgil blinks and gasps as his best friend grabs his wrist and drags both twins to an empty boys bathroom. Roman quickly checked the stalls before turning to look at the twins.
“He was window shopping,” he said and from the questioning look he got from Patton the two friends explained how they changed coffins like they changed phones. As the two vampires began to worry about Serena Star, Patton tilts his head.
“Why don't we pretend and say werewolves are real to throw her off her trail,” he offered with a raised eyebrow.
The two exchanged a look and Patton’s eyes widened, “wait are you for-” he’s cut off by the bell ringing and his worries didn't ease as they didn't respond to him.
----
As 3rd Period finished, Virgil made his way to his locker when Roman grabs his wrist again.
“Hey what’s wrong?” Virgil asked with a frown and raised an eyebrow as Roman pulled out a tube of dark red lipstick and applied it, “Serena Star got the principle to call a meeting with The Scribe,” his friend said and Virgil frowns.
“When’s the meeting?” Virgil asked curiously.
“In 5 minutes, let’s go,” Roman said as he dragged his friend towards the meeting, "you know we're the only vamps on staff, right?" Roman whispered to his friend. “So we have to get on her good side alright?”
They noticed they were the last to arrive as they noticed everyone was seated around the big editorial table where Serena Star stood in the far end with their principle.
Both goths turned to find themselves face-to-face with a WowTV camera lens. They both hadn't noticed the cameraman squeezed into the corner by the door. For a moment, Virgil felt as if he'd been turned to stone, he hated being in front of cameras, crowds, and tape recorders.
With a gulp, Virgil looked right at Serena and smiled as brightly as he could, "as the senior writer of the Franklin Grove Scribe, allow me to say what an honor it is to meet a journalist of your, uh, standing, Ms. Star. I'm sure we all have a great deal to learn from you.” No matter what he had to get in her good side
Serena Star smiles and nods, "thank you," she says clearly flattered by the praise. She gestured to the boy sitting closest to her. "This young man just said that as well,” she said as she gestured to Toby Decker.
The bunny whom Patton told him was brought by The Beasts to his home when it was the day of the ball. He was also one of the best reporters on staff.
Both vampires sat beside Camilla and that was when Serena officiously placed her palms on the table. "I called you here, fellow reporters, because I need your help."
“Whatever it is, we can do our best,” Toby said eagerly as every member of The Scribe nodded.
“Good," said Serena, "because I'd like one of you to work with me on my nationally covered story about life here in Franklin Grove."
"You mean, be your assistant?" asked Will Kerrell, a 7thgrader who usually covered sports. "Exactly,” Serena Star said as she nodded. She paused to let the information sink in. "I'm holding a audition, and the person who wins gets to be my assistant." "How exciting!" Principal Whitehead said approvingly. Virgil tilted his head a little wondering what she was up to. Serena Star looked around the table with her wide eyes, "to audition, you have to get out there and get me a quote about Garrick Stephens and his coffin." "What kind of quote?"
"Something juicy," replied Serena Star, "something that will make the American public sit up and take notice. And the person who gets the best quote will get to help me, WowTV's Serena Star, with my story," she finished, her eyes sparkling.
‘She’s using teens to get what no adult can,’ Virgil thought to himself.
Virgil cleared his throat before nervously fidgeting, "does the quote have to be about Garrick Stephens's stunt at the cemetery?" he asked raising an eyebrow. "I mean, that was just a lame practical joke, right?" "I think there's more to the story," Serena said meaningfully, "and a good reporter will find out what."
Virgil cursed under his breath at that.
Camilla raised her hand, looking a little bored, "does everyone need to get a quote? I mean, I'm more of a critic than a reporter," she explained.
"Only those with investigative reporting experience need apply," Serena answered.
Virgil raised an eyebrow seeing as Roman grinned at Camilla and whisper, "Looks like you and me are off the hook!" "Well, for those of you who do audition, I can- not imagine a greater opportunity than working with a journalist as respected as Serena Star," Principal Whitehead said.
If Serena Star noticed, she didn't show it. She flashed her trademark smile at the staffers around the table. "You have twenty-four hours to get your quotes. May the best reporter win!" she declared. "Thank you, Ms. Star," Toby Decker said professionally. With that, the Scribe staff started to file out of the room, chattering about their high profile assignment. Roman started to leave, too, but Virgil put a hand on her arm. They had to talk to Serena first. "See you," Camilla said to Roman and Virgil before heading toward the door. However, before she reached it, though, Virgil saw her do a double take and walk over to the cameraman. "That's the Sign of the Cyborg!" Camilla said, pointing to a symbol on the guy's T-shirt. "You're a Coal Knightley fan?" he responded before they were deep in conversation about Coal Knightley's books which Virgil chuckled at. Meanwhile, Virgil and Roman went over to talk to Serena, which was when the reporter grabbed Virgil's hand and shook it. As she did, she peered down at hi's fingers. "Interesting choice of nail polish," she said, raising her other hand and signaling her cameraman to come closer. He was too busy talking to Camilla to notice, so Serena smiled at Ivy in a plastic way and waved her free hand more frantically. Finally she snapped, "Martin!"
"Sorry!" Martin the cameraman said, rushing over as Camilla left the room. Serena huffed and let go of Virgil’s hand at last. She looked at him and Roman intensely. "You two must be friends with Garrick Stephens."
Virgil let out a loud deep sigh, “is this because we wear black clothes?” he asked with a strained smile.
Serena Star nodded. "Exactly."
"You mean you agree with stereotypes?" Virgil asked with a frown and a curious little tilt of his head blinking owilishly like Patton had shown him.
"What?" Serena Star spluttered, ”no! Of course not." "Thank goodness," Virgil said, "because Principal Whitehead always says that a great reporter is never swayed by prejudice." He finished with a half smile at the principal over Serena Star's shoulder. "That I do!" Principal Whitehead confirmed cheerfully. "I couldn't agree more," Serena said stiffly, glancing uncomfortably toward the camera. She changed the subject. "So where do you kids hang out?" "The diner," Roman told her with a shrug as he pulled out a mirror and played with his hair.
"Which diner?" Serena Star asked immediately.
"We like the Meat & Greet," Virgil replied.
"Is that the one that's decorated like a meat locker?" Serena Star said.
Virgil fidgets and hums, “I like Mister Smoothie,” he lies.
"Me, too," Roman chimed in quickly.
Serena Star paused. "So you two don't know Garrick Stephens?"
Roman and Virgil didn't say anything.
"And you don't know anything about him or his friends?" Serena pressed on.
"Everyone calls them the Beasts," Toby piped up from a few feet away. Virgil hadn't even realized he was still there and mentally cursed at not checking the room first.
Serena Star nodded at him encouragingly, and Toby went on. "They're always playing practical jokes and things. Several weeks ago, they dragged me to a party at Virgil's house, even though they knew I wasn't invited. Although, I don't think they were invited either, but I wasn't sure.”
Virgil’s eyes widened before he cringed. Serena turned to look at him,"you invited Garrick Stephens to a party?"
"Lots of people were invited, I can’t remember who was invited really,” Virgil said with a small nervous smile.
"But not Toby, who you work with closely on the school paper?" Serena said pointedly with a raised eyebrow at the goth boy.
Virgil shrugged helplessly.
Serena Star turned back to Toby. "What else can you tell me about Garrick and his friends?"
"I think they're into heavy metal," Toby said, "although that might just be their T-shirts. And they're always saying weird things, like `bloodsucker' this and `bloodsucker' that."
Virgil's mouth went dry and his stomach felt as if there were bats fluttering around it.
"Bloodsucker?" Serena's eyes widened. "Are you sure?"
"Yes," Toby replied.
Virgil wanted to really scream and beat up Garrick Stephens so bad.
1/?
Tag: @gothfoxx
#jenny writes#sanders sides#sanders sides au#sanders sides fic#my sister the vampire!sanders sides au#virgil sanders#patton sanders#roman sanders#logan sanders#janus sanders#vampire!virgil sanders au
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i’m always trying to find ways to lessen my impact on the environment but being a uni student means that most of the time i’m trying to find a balance between realistic long term actions and sustainability. so below, i’ve shared some of the ways i currently help lessen my environmental impact as well as some habits i’d like to slowly integrate into my life in the future.
bring your own water bottle - i think this one is pretty straight forward. i’m very lucky in the sense that my university provides a lot of refill stations. i usually pack my water the night before with my lunch so i don’t have to stress about it the next day. plus!! with my own water bottle, i can add lemon slices or mint etc. in winter, i like to use a thermos and bring honey lemon water, hot tea, or just not chilly water.
pack your own lunch - this not only helps you save money but also makes sure you know what you’re eating. i have a perfect sandwich sized container as well so it means i don’t have to use plastic wrap for anything. since i’m a vegetarian, most of my meals are pretty straightforward and feature rice, pasta, eggs etc. that i can buy in bulk with less plastic packaging as well.
bring your own utensils/keep cup - if you enjoy coffee, either sit in the cafe or bring your own reusable keep cup! my university is really conscious about this so all the nearby cafes let us bring our own cups and sometimes you even get discounts for not using single use cups. when i do go out to eat as well, i try to bring my own utensils so i don’t have to use the single use plastic (or even those wooden chopsticks) this also applies to straws for bubble tea or smoothies.
switch milks - i know a lot of people already have coconut, soy, almond milks with their coffee/tea due to lactose intolerance/other medical/personal reasons. many coffee shops do charge for plant milks but if they don’t then it’s an option since the dairy industry produces a lot of methane (also plant based milks are healthier). i don’t personally buy milk often because i don’t drink it so it’s not a big dent in my budgeting but if it is then don’t worry about it.
reuse notebooks - on top of recycling my scrap paper, i reuse notebooks that i never finished. instead of organising my notebooks in terms of papers or courses, i separate them by area of study so it means that i can use the same notebook for 3/4 years for politics or english. otherwise, i use the backs of notebooks to write practice essays, do past papers, doodle, do random brain dumps etc. essentially i treat unused paper in notebooks like loose leaf.
buy pen refills and do pen audits - find out what pens you actually use!! i know for me, i’ve felt pressured by the studyblr “aesthetic” to buy stationary that i don’t have a use for and it just results in unnecessary consumerism. i use roughly 10 pens at most as well as some art supplies but for my pens, i try to use refills instead of replacing the entire pen. in the future, i’d like to also stop using correction tape and be comfortable enough to just cross things out. i have to use a wide range of pencils for art but in general use, i simply own 3 mechanical pencils and refill the lead instead.
carry a reusable shopping bag - recently, my country banned single use plastic bags so now everyone uses reusable shopping bags or no bags. although you can buy brown paper bags for 20 cents in supermarkets, you never know what you’ll need to carry around so i like to bring a tote bag.
invest in a quilt - i am super guilty of getting cold really easily and that means i usually have the heater/thermostat on in winter when i’m studying but recently i’ve come to realise that i abuse that a lot. so instead of automatically going to turn on the heater, i try to see if i’m wearing enough first or getting a quilt to put on my lap when i feel cold. this way i don’t have to rack a super high power bill in winter.
change your mailing options - previously i’d get mail from my bank regarding bank statements etc. now i’ve opted for monthly statements online instead saving the paper that they’d use mailing me, similarly i no longer sign up for coupon books, circulars, random magazines etc.
thrift shop your clothes - i feel like this is a really big trend in my city but i’m trying to only thirft shop my clothes now instead of buying new. the thrift shops that i have access to are really good quality and it’s basically a reseller where people who bring their clothes in get 50% of the sale. this does mean that clothes are pricier than big chains like h&m but it also means that you have to think about the purchase for longer + a lot of the finds are super unique and will most likely last longer.
mend your own clothes - in a similar sense to thrifting, don’t just throw out a shirt because it’s missing a button. a 20 minute youtube tutorial can make sure that shirt remains a staple item in your wardrobe. plus sewing leads to darning your socks, knitting, crochet, or even making your own clothes.
consider epilating/laser hair removal - i used to go through so many plastic razors during summer because i was someone who preferred no hair. i know there are many people who don’t mind their body hair and that’s great! for those of you who do however, considering an epilator (multi use) or even laser hair removal (permanent). both are more expensive however they both also use less plastic (compared to fornightly/monthly throwing away of razors)
bulk make your own snacks - i really want to make my own museli bars in the future since i eat them a lot. usually i try to limit my snacks to things like carrot/celery sticks, fruit, nuts, berries etc. but i try to not get individually packaged snacks (they can be more expensive as well since you’re paying for convenience). this is definitely something i can work on but i’d like to be able to bulk make my own granola, museli, dips etc. in the future.
replant your vegetables - this is a lot more achievable for me since the place i live is rural in land style. currently my family has a multitude of fruit trees, tea trees and we’ve recently gotten into reusing our vegetable scraps. for celery/cabbage/lettuce/etc. you can replant the root area. the same goes for spring onions (which are super easy to grow! and garlic cloves!) most vegetables are quite easy to grow with just a bit of googling. even if you don’t have a lot of space but would like to give this a shot, consider adding some herbs to your indoors plant collection.
visit farmers markets - unfortunately, this isn’t that big a thing where i live but i remember going to a few as a kid and the produce is much fresher, the atmosphere is lovely, and it’s a good way to source food and products. many stalls also sell premade items like jams, sauces, baked goods, soap etc. so if you find yourself busy then it may be a possible investment to buy from farmers markets.
some other habits: composting, public transport, bicycling, bamboo toothbrushes, natural home cleaners, raising your own animals, beeswax wraps, cloth napkins/handkerchiefs, buy in bulk, use rain water to water your plants, invest in a menstrual cup, choose wooden over plastic
disclaimer: you don’t necessarily need to buy anything to be more environment friendly!! some things on this list do suggest it but look at your life currently, if you don’t drink coffee or tea on the go then there’s no need for a keep cup etc. invest in products, don’t just buy them because they’ve been advertised.also, i’d like to iterate that whilst climate change is a very real and very scary threat, personal use by the general population only results in a small part of it so please don’t feel like you’re letting anyone down if your personal situation or any part of your life prevents you from doing more than a few things to help the environment. as long as you’re not being dick to the environment and taking 4 hour showers, using 500 plastic straws a day then doing your best is enough. if you can’t do anything more in lessening your environmental footprint, then that’s okay. other people might be able to so even just spreading the news could help a lot.
if you have any other habits that you do not in this list then please tell me as well so we can all learn from each other !
happy learning everyone xx
#environment#study#studyblr#studyspo#studylustre#studypetals#heysareena#heycho#lookpat#eintsein#studyplants#studyquill#obsidianstudy#studyinspo#reference#resources
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tagged by @ashipwreckcoast for a question thinger. I’m bored out of my skull and I like these questions so here you go. You should do it. Yes, you. Why? Because? I don’t have real reazons.
Putting this under a cut because its long and I don’t want to clog up your dash.\
1. Do you prefer writing with a black pen or blue pen? Black, specifically Pilot G2 pens. But really? I like a good dark dark green. My dog ate my favorite pen and I haven’t been able to find one in that color since.
2. Would you prefer to live in the country or city? I’ve sort of done both. I love living in a city, with all the vibrancy and life that it entails. There’s public transit, arts and culture, so many kinds of food, interesting people and always something going on. But for the last few years, I’ve been wanting to get back to something like where I went to school, where I lived for 7 months on a lake and the next closest people (besides us 9) were 5 miles away (the road up to the field station was 2 miles by itself and we got snowed in and flooded in on more than one occasion). I miss being close to deep nature and the peace that comes from being alone.
So which do I prefer? I don’t really know. I’ve been living back in a city for the past eight years but I’m feeling like its time for a change. I don’t think I’ll leave cities forever though. I like people and diversity too much.
3. If you could learn a new skill what would it be? For fun, I’d want to pick up leatherworking, blacksmithing, and/or woodworking. I’m currently not set up well to do any of them though. For practicality though, I’d want to learn general house maintenance.
4. Do you drink your tea/coffee with sugar? Depends on the tea, but often yes. Coffee gets an obscene amount of hazelnut creamer because I hate coffee but I love caffeine.
5. What was your favourite book as a child? The Hobbit. My dad and step-dad both read it to me at different points of my childhood and my dad gave me his copy (The Hobbit or There and Back Again, 1977 Illustrated edition)
6. Do you prefer baths or showers? Showers. Baths are well and good if you have a big enough one (which I don’t) and you don’t stay in so long it gets cold (I don’t).
7. If you could be a mythical creature, which one would it be? Upon reading this question, every single mythical creature that I’d ever read about immediately vanished from my memory. I’m going to have to come back to this one.
I came back to this one and I still don’t know. I like the idea of flying. But I don’t really want to be hunted out to extinction.
8. Paper or electronic books? I love paper books, but I read much better via ebook. I still haven’t read Gideon the Ninths because the pages are so soft I just sit and pet them instead of read.
9. What is your favourite item of clothing? BOXERS! Or rather, boxer-briefs. I know this sounds weird but bear with me. For some reason, when I started transitioning, it did not occur to me to buy mens underwear. When I finally did, It Was Amazing. I looked great. I felt great. I finally understood why so many people had “fun” underwear that they liked. Before, I had like one or two that had patterns/stuff on them. Now? I’ve got Star Wars and Captain Marvel and Deadpool and mountains and mushrooms and one with boxers that makes me laugh because there’s boxers on boxers!! And I can wear them whenever the fuck I want! So I always have something fun on, even (especially) if other folks can’t see it. Switching to boxers was such a weirdly affirming thing for my gender and I love it.
10. Do you like your name or would you like to change it? This is complicated. I like my legal name, sure, but its not me, not really. I did get the spelling updated on it legally when I was 16 so I could actually get my driver’s license. I haven’t had a chance to change my legal name since transitioning (between the election and COVID, I don’t know that I’d get through all of the legal rigmarole in time to vote in November), but I really like my chosen name and an altered version of my legal name will be my new middle name.
11. Who is a mentor to you? I’ve had so many over the years. I learn so much from people, but I had so many great mentors when I worked at the museum. Timshel stands out. If I can be half the mentor she is to someone, I’ll have put some real solid good into the world.
12. Would you like to be famous and if so, what for? No. Not in the everyone knows you sense. That’s not my jam. I wouldn’t mind having fame more in the sense of within a tiny field, being well known and respected.
13. Are you a restless sleeper? Yes... to the point where I’m seeing a sleep specialist in a month to sort it out.
14. Do you consider yourself a romantic person? Very much so. But there’s so many different ways to be romantic.
15. Which element best represents you? I hate these questions. I see bits of myself in all of the elements. People often associate me with air or water though.
16. Who do you want to be closer to? Distance wise, my family in California. I come from a bunch of very close knit families and so having folks on the other side of the country that I’m super close with is ihard.
17. Do you miss someone at the moment? “Everyone. Being solitary by choice as opposed to demand is a big difference.” I’m just going to leave @ashipwreckcoast‘s response here because it fits. I’m very lucky that I am still working in a (relatively) safe environment, but we’re all missing out on things like throwing a housewarming party for one of my closest friends/coworkers. Even though we see each other almost daily, we’re still missing out on a lot that we’d normally do. That’s even worse for folks I’m not seeing at all because of COVID.
18. Tell us about an early childhood memory. I legit thought I was a wolf and would howl at the neighbors when mom packed me into the wagon to go do laundry at the laundromat. The neighbors, being good people, howled back.
19. What is the strangest thing you have eaten? There have been a few times where I wasn’t sure what I was eating. One was at a wedding with 10 or 12 courses (I lost count) and some of them were foods I’d never seen before. I know jellyfish was on that list but there was a bunch of other stuff that I don’t know what it was. The few times I’ve been out of the country, I ate stuff I couldn’t identify (often due to language barriers). The seafood soup at the one place was just whatever they caught that day and it had a lot in it. I remember being disappointed in my fellow grad students when some of them turned it down. You don’t turn down food when you’re a guest unless you have a medical reason for doing so. But the thing is, none of these are strange, except by the US standards. So if that’s true, then the deep fried dragonfly should also be on this list.
20. What are you most thankful for? Most? That’s so hard to quantify. If I really think about it, it’s things like having a loving partner and a home and food and the ability to pay my bills, I guess.
21. Do you like spicy food? I do not like capsaisin related spices but I love horseradish type spices. I do liked well spiced, but not necessarily spicy, foods.
22. Have you ever met someone famous? A few times. Sometimes at the museum (worked with some of them). Sometimes at special events, like attending lectures.
23. Do you do you keep a diary or journal? Generally no. I do sometimes get the urge to write and reflect on stuff, so I’ll do that when the mood strikes.
24. Do you prefer to use a pen or a pencil? I’ve been trained to use pens for everything (I work in a chem lab). Pencils are fine, but you need the right kind for the satisfying scratchiness. I cannot abide scratchiness in my pens.
25. What is your star sign? Cancer. Why is this important?
26. Do you like your cereal soggy or crunchy? Not super soggy but not straight out of the box crunchy. Does that make sense?
27. What would you want your legacy to be? I want my legacy to be built on kindness and helping others. I know that’s cheesy and cliche, but I have so much privilege that I want to use to benefit others.
28. Do you like reading, what was the last book you read? I love reading. I’m on book 30 for the year. The last one I finished was Starsight by Brandon Sanderson, which is book 2 of 3 of the Skyward series and HE HASN’T STARTED BOOK 3 YET!! I read Skyward and Starsight in four days total.
29. How do you show someone you love them? I often cook for them.
30. Do you like ice in your drinks? Only for certain things. I don’t mind drinking most drinks at room temperature and ice waters stuff down. It’s good for iced tea though, but only if you need to cool it.
31. What are you afraid of? This isn’t a fair question. I’m afraid of being abandoned or fucking things up. I’m also afraid of spiders and the milk in my fridge expiring. I’m afraid of filling out forms (forms are really hard and make me extremely anxious). I’m afraid of phone calls, but I’m good at them. I’m afraid of public speaking, but you’d never know it unless I told you. I’m afraid of losing the people I love, of dying without having put some good into the world. I’m afraid for my neighbors, for my brothers and sister, for my niece. The world is overwhelmingly scary right now.
32. What is your favourite scent? Campfires, the smell of a fresh spring rain, leather, the weird musky scent of my kitten, of garlic and onions cooking low and slow. There’s too many.
33. Do you address older people by their name or surname? Depends on who and in what context I know them.
34. If money was not a factor, how would you live your life? I’d travel a lot more. I’d donate to a lot of things. Museums, arts, individuals. I’d love to just go on to gofundme and just straight up fund folks to their goals plus a bit extra. And then go figure out where the systematic failures were that lead to them not being able to afford it in the first place.
35. Do you prefer swimming in pools or the ocean? Ocean. Absolutely. But this is also lake and river erasure.
36. What would you do if you found £50 on the ground? I guess exchange it for USD.
37. Have you ever seen a shooting star? Yeah. They’re magical every time.
38. What is the one thing you would want to teach your children? Be kind. To yourself and others.
39. If you had to have a tattoo, what would it be and where would you get it? I’ve got several I want. I was supposed to get an anchor with an octopus chilling on it on my inner forearm for my one year anniversary on testosterone but then COVID hit and well... who know when I‘ll get it.
40. What can you hear now? Mostly just the AC and the tack of the keys on the keyboard. Occasionally a particularly loud vehicle makes itself known.
41. Where do you feel the safest? Curled up with my partner and dog.
42. What is the one thing you want to overcome/conquer? Probs my anxiety.
43. If you could travel back to any era, what would it be?
44. What is your most used emoji? The crying laughing one. I survive on sending stupid memes and shit back and forth with too many people. After that, the heart.
45. Describe yourself using one word. Oof
46. What do you regret the most? Not trusting myself when I figured out I was trans back in undergrad. That whole decade of burying it all and internalizing a lot of transphobia really did a number on myself.
47. Last movie you saw? I think it was Birds of Prey and the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn
48. Last tv show you watched? Rewatching Avatar with my partner right now. We just finished She-Ra.
49. Invent a word and its meaning. I just... I don’t know. I’m a Webster. I just compile what other people say in a book.
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Hogwarts Mystery vampire OC
Name: Carmilla Noctem
Gender: Female
House: Gryffindor
Wand: Cedar wood with a dragon heartstring core, 8” and brittle flexibility
Birthday: October 13
Appearance: Silver color eyes. Blue twintails with bangs that cover her left eye. Black lipstick. Pale skin. Pointy incisor teeth. Black short sleeve crop top with long sleeve fishnet top underneath. Black choker with a silver bat pendant. Black skinny jeans with red tattered skirt. Black combat boots. Red fingernails. Black drawn-on eyebrows with stitching design. Charcoal eyeshadow with red eyeliner.
Personality: Shy. Reclusive. Introverted. Loyal to friends she makes. Very friendly. Has a dark sense of humor. Highly intelligent. Deep thinker. When scared or startled, she’ll hide behind someone she trusts.
Interests: Loves horror related things. Telling scary stories. Metal music. Can play bass guitar. Stargazing. Loves cats.
Dislikes: Sunlight. Large crowds. Making conversation. Being betrayed in any capacity. Garlic. Mirrors. People with negative energy. Public speaking.
Favorite classes: Astronomy. Divination.
Least favorite classes: History of Magic. Defense Against the Dark Arts.
Just to be clear, I made this purely for fun since there’s no way in hell that Jam City is doing this... and if they are, this is proof that I had the idea first.
This is some starter info just so I can put the idea out and see how this develops.
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Sweet Music Playing in the Dark: Ch.2- Lip and Cheek (Craquaria)- Dill
A/N: Hi guys! Here’s the second chapter for sweet music. This is my first smut attempt, so I hope it’s okay lol. I’m working on a few things at the moment that will slowly trickle out now that I’m done with school. You can find me on AO3 @drdill. Thanks for reading!
Summary: Soon Max will be moving to New York, and Gio interrogates Kevin to see if they could last.
“Come on, it’s totally Bill.”
Max stuffs another piece of sushi in his mouth, watching Mamma Mia! intensely on the television, knees to his chest on my couch.
“I don’t disagree, I’m just saying this all could’ve been avoided with a paternity test.”
“Don’t try to get technical with this masterpiece.”
“Fair enough,” I giggle. “I wouldn’t be mad if Sam proposed to me, though.”
“Well, obviously. He could get it any day of the week.” I choke on my water.
Earlier in the day, he knocked on my door, my sandals between his fingers and a smirk on his lips. Probably thinking my life is a mess, he asked me about my swollen knee and it turned into an hour of us drinking coffee at my kitchen table. Wanting to repay him for his hospitality the night prior, I suggested sushi and a cheesy film in sweats. From my obnoxiously loud ABBA jam-session in the morning that left “Dancing Queen” in his head for the rest of the day, he chose appropriately.
The final scene ends to the Netflix home screen and I start picking-up empty soy sauce packets.
“Sorry for getting wasabi on your couch,” Max says, standing up to help clean.
“Don’t worry about it. There’s been worse things on it,” I tell him with a wink, immediately ready to punch myself in the face. Why the fuck do I open my mouth? He just laughs and shakes his head.
“I’m not even gonna ask.”
We head back to the couch, sitting opposite, staring anywhere but directly at each other. He’s stretched out towards me while I sit cross-legged and hands in my lap. Seconds pass and we’re waiting for the other to initiate some form of conversation, resorting to him making a fun beat with his hands on the side of the couch and this thigh, and me bobbing my head and shimmying my shoulders. A laugh escapes me.
“What’s on your mind?” he asks me.
“I don’t know,” I say, fully honest. “Most weekends where I do nothing aren’t this fun.”
It feels like a first date- painfully hesitant. For the twenty-seven hours I’ve known him, he’s surely made an impact. Maybe I’m just desperate for the attention he’s giving, and maybe the feeling is mutual, but I’d rather be entangled in blind affection than ignorant to it.
“I’ll be honest, I wasn’t expecting to make a friend during my quick stay,” he tells me, “but I’m so glad you fell on that fire escape.” He chuckles when I roll my eyes and observe the bandages wrapped around my bruised knee.
“As embarrassing as that was, I guess the garlic bread was worth it,” I smile. He shifts positions and crosses his legs like me, moving close enough for our knees to touch.
“Since we’re sharing thoughts,” he says, “something’s been eating at me.”
“And what is that?” He sighs. “Last night, when you said goodbye, we shared a quick hug and you were gone.”
My lips are between my teeth, unsure which direction this could turn.
“When just hours before, you wanted to kiss me like it was nothing.”
Relief quenches me like a cool glass of water.
“Well,” I reply, leaning a bit closer, “I can tell you that it wasn’t nothing.”
“You don’t say?” His draws circles on my kneecap through my black joggers. I nod in response when he greets my eyes, leering.
Like muscle memory, we find ourselves in the same position as last night. This time, the puzzle pieces fit together, completing what could’ve been my evening departure. His lips are even softer than they look, sweet and tangy like the lemonade he sipped during the movie. I smell his aftershave on my next inhale before deepening our kiss, bunching his shirt in my hands and pushing him onto his back. Propped on my elbows, I drag my tongue over his bottom lip and reconnect to his mouth, full of paradise. He leisurely travels down my spine to my lower back. For the time being, it’s a musical rapture.
Then there’s an abrupt knock at my door.
It was maybe fifteen seconds. Fifteen seconds. I’m fuming, nostrils flared and eyes slowly shutting.
“The universe really doesn’t want this, huh?” he says with a sympathetic grin. I peck his lips before standing and unlocking the door.
Kevin greets me with a huge smile- of all the people to ruin our moment.
“Hi, honey.”
“Someone’s back early,” I say, moderately bothered.
“I really didn’t want to bother you, but I must’ve left my key at my sister’s and Max wasn’t answering his phone. Could I use your spare?”
“Hi, Kevin.” Max pokes his head from the couch.
“Maxie!! Y’all already met!?” He’s elated at the sight of his friend, which quickly turns to sheer panic. “Oh shit. Did I jus-”
“No, it’s fine. We were just hanging out. Being neighborly and all,” I say before Max can speak, unenthusiastic jazz hands to follow. Max’s face drops and nods.
“Yeah, I can let you back in. It’s pretty late anyway,” Max tells Kevin, hopping off the couch and standing next to me.
“Thanks for the sushi, Gio.” He goes for an awkward hug, an even worse ending than last night.
“Anytime.”
Kevin watches us stiffly before giving me a hug.
“You up for brunch tomorrow?” he asks me. I hide my irritation with a cheeky smile.
“Duh! Max will you still be around?” I must’ve caught him off-guard.
“Hm? Oh, yeah! Yeah I can come.” He’s flustered.
“Wonderful. See you guys tomorrow?”
“I’ll knock when we’re ready!” Kevin replies. He leads the way out of my apartment with Max.
“Bye-bye.” I shut the door and reflect. Of all the people to ruin our moment. I love Kevin. Typically he annoys me with bombarding my phone with texts, but this time, nothing- the one time I don’t get minute-by-minute updates on his train ride home. I throw myself on the empty bed, frustrated and lonely.
—-
*knock knock knock*
I grab my wallet and head for the door in white converse, rolled black shorts, and matching black tank top. In the hallway, Kevin’s alone wearing a coral v-neck with khaki shorts and flip flops.
“Where’s Max?” I ask.
“Bathroom. He should be out in a sec.” He looks down at my legs.
“What happened to your knee?”
“Oh, I just fell,” I say, shrugging my shoulders.
With those words, Max opens the door in a navy button-up and flip flops, still drying his hands on his shorts. His hair for the past couple of days was fluffy and unkempt, curling on his forehead. Today, it’s tamed with some wax, swooped to the side, and absolutely delightful.
The restaurant is a few blocks from our building. We get a table, a few drinks, and discuss Kevin’s quick return.
“So, why’d you come back so early?” I ask, still annoyed with prior events. Max, sitting next to Kevin, gives me a smug look that he can’t see.
“I overestimated how much time I can handle them,” he cackles. “Also, my momma kept showing me photos of her church friends’ single daughters. The mothafuckin’ nerve!” I laugh and swirl my drink.
My favorite part of these brunch dates is when Kevin’s adorable Caribbean mother calls him while he tells me about his latest hookup (in too much detail), trying to play matchmaker after mass. He always exaggerates his workload to explain how he, the gayest person on this planet, doesn’t have time for a girlfriend.
“I still have no idea how she hasn’t figured it out yet,” I tell him.
“One of these days, I’ll probably get fed up and tell her. We’re getting close.”
“You should’ve just asked how their sons are doing,” Max says. Kevin howls as he takes a satisfying sip of his drink.
Our food comes a bit later and we continue catching up, Kevin and Max telling old stories from college in-between bites as I listen. The more they speak, the more I realize they are the exact same person in different bodies. It’s almost scary; from karaoke nights at a cheap dive bar near campus, to reenacting musicals in their apartment with friends, I’m surprised Kevin’s barely ever mentioned him to me.
Unintentionally, I keep staring at Max. No particular reason, just watching him: the way he eats his fries, talks with his hands, covers his mouth after laughing too hard. I become so fixated that whatever Kevin is babbling about turns inaudible- I just keep looking at the slight stubble poking through his chin that he scratches every so often, the scar on his right elbow when he props it on the table, even how he nods along to every word Kevin says. He’s a completely average guy, but I’m mesmerized by every small detail.
“Would you like some more water?” I’m snapped out of the trance by our waitress holding a metal pitcher in front of me.
“Oh, um, yes please.” She refills my glass and walks off.
“I’ll be back. I’m going to the bathroom.” Max stands up and goes away from the table. I catch myself staring again as he walks away until he turns a corner and is out of sight. Then, I’m greeted with a fresh pair of eyes from Kevin. With the coy glare, I think he’s connected the dots.
“What?”
“I know that look, G,” he replies.
“Oh, shut up.”
“Since when were tiny white guys your type?”
“Since Friday night.” Apparently, I’m ready to spill.
“I was wondering when you guys met. Y’all were pretty close last night.”
“We met completely on accident. I tripped on the fire escape steps and he helped clean the scrape, then asked me to stay for dinner.”
“I thought you ‘just fell.’” He’s using air quotes, taunting me from my previous answer.
“I didn’t lie.”
“Y’all were being more than neighborly last night, weren’t you?”
“Wouldn’t you like to know?”
“I totally cock-blocked you, didn’t I?”
I’m silent and avoiding eye contact, causing him to go wide-eyed.
“Oh my GOD.” He slaps the table with every word, way too excited and causing patrons to stare. “I knew it!”
“Shh!” I’m attempting to contain his emotions, pinning his arms down on the table. When he finally cooperates, I speak softly.
“We almost kissed Friday night, and I redeemed myself yesterday until you just had to ruin it, bitch!”
“Well if I would’ve known my friends were fucking I wouldn’t have knocked!”
“We didn’t think you’d be home until Monday!”
“True,” he cackles. “I can’t believe you two were ready to hook up that quick. Max typically isn’t into hookups.”
“I can’t believe you barely talked about him with me!”
“I didn’t think you’d be interested!”
“Well, I wasn’t until he started acting all hospitable. He’s so nice.”
“You’re telling me! If he wasn’t a top that’s half of my size I would’ve married him by now.” The last sentence almost has my jaw in my lap.
“That man is a top?”
“You are such a whore.”
“Don’t change the subject.”
“I only speak facts, babe,” he winks. “But you didn’t hear it from me.” A sip of his mimosa and Max appears from the corner again, sitting down and returning to his meal.
“What’d I miss?” he asks. I shake my head.
“Nothing much.”
——
Evening rolls around and I run upstairs to check on my laundry. When I throw the load in the dryer and come back down, Max is standing in the hallway with his bags, placing his ticket in his jacket pocket.
“Leaving so soon?” I ask with a smile.
“Very late, actually. My flight leaves in two hours and I haven’t even called an Uber.”
“Oh, shit. I shouldn’t keep you then.” I reach in for a hug and he wraps his arms around me softly.
“Be safe heading back.”
“I will,” he tells me. “See you in a few weeks.”
With that, he gives me a cheeky grin and walks quickly down the hallway to the elevators where this mess started. I go back inside, a deep sigh following. What am I doing?
My conversation with Kevin this morning has stuck with me all day. I need more answers. Stepping onto the fire escape with a blunt, I tap on his window until the curtains draw back and he opens it.
“You rang?”
“I’ve got some questions.” He laughs and shakes his head.
“Me too. But keep it quick. Grandpa is getting tired.”
We sit down, feet dangling from the platform when I light the joint and taste it’s sourness. I pass it to Kevin.
“Before I start, can you promise to be as honest as possible?”
“Yes, Judge Judy.”
“Okay, good. You said he normally doesn’t do hookups, right?”
“Nope. He hasn’t been with someone since sophomore year.” That’s weird.
“Seriously?”
“Well, kind of. He had an on-and-off thing with this asshole named Jake until graduation that fucked with his psyche a lot. He’d leave Max every couple of months and come running back like nothing happened. I wanted to kill him, then Max for falling for his bullshit.” Kevin’s getting re-heated just by talking about it, taking multiple hits before passing the blunt back to me. “He cares so much, probably too much.” I nod along.
“Anyways,” he says, “How much have you seen each other while I’ve been gone?”
“Probably like ten hours total.”
“In two days?”
“Yeah?”
“Wow. What kind of social butterfly did Max turn into since I left the west coast?”
“He keeps to himself a lot?”
“All of the time. That’s why I was so shocked when you guys were hanging out together, let alone doing whatever that was when I knocked.”
“Calm down, we didn’t get anywhere when you interrupted,” I giggle.
He sighs. “I don’t know what you did to him, but he seems really interested in you. I asked him about the weekend after brunch, and he was floored about goddamn sushi and Mamma Mia!.”
“Did you consider my incredible charm and wit?” I smirk and nudge his shoulder, causing him to sway and laugh.
“I’m sure that’s what it was. Listen, as much fun as this is, I’m falling asleep out here.” “Fine. One last question.” “What is it?” “…can I have his number?” I ask bashfully.
“You mean to tell me that y’all were getting hot and heavy and didn’t even bother to get that on night one?!”
“It wasn’t the first thought in my mind when I climbed on top of him, bitch!” He rolls his eyes with a smile, takes out his phone, and sends me his contact information.
—-
I didn’t text him. The first man to give me attention for more than three hours to hook up, and I’m blowing it to smithereens because I’m too nervous to make the first move.
A few weeks have passed since he left for Seattle again. He’s probably moving in right now as I answer emails and procrastinate by looking at old looks from this year’s Met Gala. A camp aesthetic? My fucking dream. A message appears on my Mac from Kevin.
Do I have to do everything for this relationship to blossom?
I’m confused, until my phone starts buzzing. I reach into my pocket and see that it’s Max. Oops.
“Hello?”
“Gio?”
“Hey, Max.”
“Hi. Uh, Kevin gave me your number.” I chuckle.
“I figured. How’ve you been?” “I’m so sore. Kevin and I have been moving boxes and furniture all day.” “Why didn’t Kevin let me know sooner? I would’ve helped out,” I tell him as if I couldn’t text him for a month.
“Well, that’s actually why I called you. Kevin just left and I still have a lot of unpacking to do. Are you busy?”
Surprisingly, I actually do have plans. Some coworkers invited me out to drinks tonight because I was in the room as they discussed plans, but it’s not the first time I’ve bailed on them. They definitely won’t miss me.
“Not at all! Send me the address and I’ll be there soon.”
“You’re a lifesaver! I’ll text it to you now.”
“Alright, I’ll see you soon.”
He sends me the address and I get dressed to bare the Brooklyn heat. Before leaving, I text Kevin back:
I’m pulling my weight. Don’t worry ;)
—-
“How was the drive?” I’m helping him load plates and glass cups into his cabinets while he stands on a chair.
“Too fucking long,” he says, “It took me five days to get here, but I stayed with my friend Brian when I got to Milwaukee, then Tony in Chicago. Every other place was just some crappy motel and a prayer that I wouldn’t get bed bugs.” I snicker at the last comment.
“At least you get to sleep in your own bed tonight.” “Yeah, finally.”
We finish putting away every bowl, spoon, and rubber spatula he brought and break down the boxes for the trash. His living room is barren besides a bunch of bubble wrap and tape lining the lightwood floor and an empty bookcase with hundreds of novels on the floor next to it. It smells like an old bookstore- the sunset bleeds through and highlights every dust particle floating around the room. Max stands by the small island in the kitchen, hands on his hips. He’s glowing, arms and face golden before the sun falls over a building and everything turns gray. Clearly exhausted, he gives me a smile and a look that begs us to return to the mess tomorrow.
“Welcome to New York.” I mirror his smile and pull him into a hug. He sways us back and forth in absolute fervor, dancing in my arms.
“We need to celebrate. Grab the wine in the fridge.”
As I get the bottle, which is the only thing in his fridge, he greets me with two coffee mugs- the Seattle skyline painted across both.
“The wine glasses must’ve been in a different box,” he says, a giant grin plastered on his face. “My mom made these.”
“Classy,” I smirk.
He follows behind with the bottle opener as I sit against the white wall, legs crossed and scrolling through his laptop’s music library. After uncorking, he pours almost full cups for the both of us, and slides down the wall next to me, moonlight from the window striking his leg as he stretches. To go with some acoustics, I jokingly search-up a Yule log video for mood lighting. He laughs and rolls his eyes watching the crackling embers on his computer screen.
“Dumb ass,” he whispers under his breath before raising his mug toward me. I do the same.
“To crushed dreams and expensive rent!”
“L'chaim!” I reply. We clash our drinks together and sip occasionally. I’m relieved he bought sweet wine this time, watching dusk swallow the sky.
Through fifteen minutes, radio silence. His shirt reflects a light orange from the fake flames, darkness encapsulating the living room. My head rests on the wall, eyes shut and feeling Max bobbing to the music every once in a while, silently pouring more wine into our mugs. No moments on my own fire escape have felt so peaceful, especially when the next song plays:
If you were falling,
Then I would catch you.
You need a light,
I’d find a match.
Max starts quietly humming the chorus, swaying back and forth with his eyes closed. I silently laugh when our arms brush against one another.
‘Cause I love the way you say good morning,
And you take me the way I am.
Eventually, his head softly lands on my shoulder as it did so perfectly weeks before. I hide the smile forming on my lips, slowly inching my fingers. Reaching his hand on the floor, they playfully dance on his knuckles before intertwining, giving a gentle squeeze.
I feel his prickly cheek glide across my skin until his lips connect, placing delicate kisses from my shoulder to collar bone. The sensation causes the hairs on my arm to stand, a deep sigh escaping. He continues sprinkling soft pecks along the area, using a finger to move the strap of my tank top and grazing my slicked, bare chest. My hand detaches from his and relocates to the side of his jaw, thumb tracing as he squeezes my thigh. I lean my head back in satisfaction, hungry for any contact, and he wastes no time moving off the wall and attacking my neck with more aggression. The suction tingles as his tongue soothes the spaces he bruises, his hand traveling up my thigh, nearly at my crotch. I can smell the wine in his breath.
“M-Max…” I’m barely making words. He raises a single finger and lightly drags my lips, silencing me. His control may be rousing, but I’m tired of waiting.
Growing impatient, I reach under his thigh and pull him towards me. His leg swings across and straddles my lap- I immediately feel his growing harness as he grips my cheeks. Thousands of fireworks go off in my head as I finally taste his lips on mine. It’s sour and velvety, our noses smash together upon impact, tongues sloppily discovering rhythm. Our music has been drowned by deep exhales and the fabric of our shorts at the slightest friction. I take his bottom lip between my teeth, eliciting a moan when our mouths reconnect. My arms pull him closer to make sure this isn’t some painful dream, teeth clashing and steadily rolling my hips. I reach under his shirt, outlining every back muscle during the passionate exchange. Without missing a beat, he starts lifting the white fabric, revealing his lightly-toned torso and prominent v-line. He smirks as my eyes grow wide, unsure of what I was expecting, and finds my lips again before tossing it near some boxes. I shut the laptop and wrap my arms around him once more.
After several minutes, we relax and catch our breath, still firmly attached with his arms around my neck and mine on his waist. He pulls me close, fingers lost in my hair with my head at his chest. I kiss his sternum as he controls his breathing.
“Took us long enough,” he smirks. I smile and place another kiss on his salty skin.
Looking up from his embrace, his face is shining, beads of sweat forming at his hairline with his mouth agape, forming a light smile. Standing slowly, he extends his hand, head motioning to the bedroom. I graciously accept as he helps me up and leads to the door- a quick admiration for his shoulder muscles and notice of a weird tattoo I’ll ask about later. We have more important plans.
The door shuts behind us and I can only see silhouettes, nightfall and car headlights pouring through the two windows near his bed. Barely in the room, I ditch my tank top on the floor and grab his waist from behind. His neck cranes back as I bruise the porcelain skin, fingers tracing up and down my arm. I feel his chin on my cheek and I lift my head, tenderly greeted by his lips. My hands drop to his hips, fingertips progressing to his stark erection as I stroke it’s length. Eagerly, he takes my wrist and moves it to his waistband, to which I duck underneath and grab his cock, thumbing the head and spreading the precum before pleasuring him.
“Oh my God,” he severs from my lips, groaning and grasping my neck hairs hard as I revert focus to his shoulder.
“I’ve been dreaming about you,” I whisper, my hand moves up and down excruciatingly slow, teasing something that’s been built-up for a month.
“Th-that makes two of us.” He stutters, breathing deeply as I continue to stroke his shaft.
“Show me,” I simper and bite his earlobe, my free hand rubbing his chest. With those words, his hands reach behind to grab my shorts at the waist and yank them to my thighs. He stops my action by turning around to face me, pulling the minimal clothing off of my body, exposing my erection. Kneeling before me, he places a chaste kiss on my inner thigh, dangerously close, before pushing me toward the bed.
My legs hit the sides of the mattress and cause me to sit close to the edge. Max travels down from my collar bones to my navel, lips and tongue blessing my torso as my fingers comb his hair when he falls back to his knees. He licks from base to head, swirling his tongue before taking me in his mouth. I’m brought to my elbows in luxury, relishing in his skill. His hand works in tandem on my shaft while the other grips my thigh.
Holy shit.
It doesn’t take long before I’m encapsulated- euphoric moans escape, head thrown back when he takes the entire length to the back of his throat and gags. My body starts to twitch, knowing I’m getting close. Sitting up, I place my hand at his cheek, slowing his pace to a halt, chocolate eyes dark with passion, skin waxen and pale blue in the moonlight, almost angelic.
I meet him halfway with my lips, salty and wet, finally pulling his shorts and underwear down. He steps out of this clothes and I scoot farther onto the bed when he climbs over me again and sloppily kisses my mouth. We roll around the pale cotton sheets, savoring the embrace and caressing each other’s bodies. Laying on our sides, his hand travels down my back and hastily grabs my ass, slapping it when he makes contact. My breath hitches- it burns in the best way possible. His stomach is warm against mine, legs intertwined with sensual murmurs filling the air.
“Fuck me,” I mumble against his lips. “Please.” Our kissing stops and he meets my eyes.
“Are you sure?”
I nod, giving him a quick peck, a grin forming on his lips.
He quickly slides off the bed while I move closer to the pillows. Rummaging through a bag close to the bathroom, he pulls out a condom and some lube and walks over to me, body shining from perspiration. A loud snap and the cap pops open, the sticky liquid coating his fingers before he sits in between my legs. I’m already balling the sheets in my hands, licking my lips and anticipating to crumble at his touch. His cold middle finger teases my entrance. It’s tingling, almost painful with build-up. There’s a sharp sting when he enters one finger, pumping slowly with his other hand tracing my abdomen. I sigh in relief at the sensation, eyes fluttering shut. He introduces a second finger, leaning down and peppering my hips with kisses, arm moving faster and faster within me. My chest jolts at his fingers dancing atop my rib cage and reaching my jaw, his thumb outlining my bottom lip. To his surprise, I take it in my mouth and begin to suck lightly
“Fuck,” is all he can breathe as I moan onto his finger. Eventually, he slows his pace before removing his fingers, eliciting a whimper from me and a smirk from him. I hear the crinkling of the condom wrapper as he tears it open and slides it over his cock. Propped on his arms at my sides, he leaves me with a glossy stare before settling back on his knees and grabbing my thighs.
The head grazes over my entrance until he thrusts idly about halfway. My knuckles turn white, clutching the bedding and hissing as I get used to the pressure. In a couple of movements, we groan in unison when he’s fully inside me. It feels like a bolt of electricity shooting through my veins at the sensation. He quickens the pace with each advance, holding my waist tightly.
I can barely see his face, making out small details: a single hair is curled on his forehead, brows furrowed close together, an expression of pure zeal in his eyes and mouth. My legs wrap around his hips and he balances over me, arms by my ears and chests becoming parallel, sweat exchanging when they graze each other.
I’m becoming overstimulated, grunting with every one of his thrusts, face turning red. I start shivering, getting close and panting. Stroking myself quickly, my back arches as beads of white coat his chest and drip onto my stomach. I collapse underneath him. Max’s hands find mine among the chaos and bring them over my head, interlocking fingers as he groans into my shoulder.
In a short moment, his body begins to contort. I feel the warmth inside me when he exhales loudly and finishes, arms wobbling and fighting to keep him up.
——
We lay in our sweat. The only sounds I can hear are our heartbeats and Max’s deep breaths next to me. I’m on my side with my arm draped over his chest while he scratches the back of my neck. He kisses my forehead softly before pushing himself off the bed and walking to the bathroom. The light he turns on blinds me when I roll over. Shielding my eyes, he comes back with a damp washcloth, wiping himself before handing it to me and climbing back into bed, examining the contusions blanketing my throat and chest. I toss the towel on the floor.
“You’re incredible.” Max’s first words to me after everything are as soft as every kiss he leaves on my hand and knuckles. If I weren’t drained, I’d pin him back down and show my appreciation, but instead I turn back to my side and lazily embrace him as we lock lips for the millionth time. I don’t want this night to end, but my head aches for sleep and he breaks to yawn. His head drops to the pillow, arm still around me with the other on his rib cage. My body curls into his, falling fast asleep.
He cares too much, but so do I, and I think we’ll be okay with that.
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Diary 12 (doze)
07-20.04.2022
Th. After a college, Lagman
Fr. Missed a work day, that realised to me by my mama as for a distant studying. Wa on tv. Cooked fish. Dinos gay mov
Sa. Go to work with mama, got bought Nummy jam loafs, god black garlic bread.
Sd. Slum scary dream epopee for 1 pm. Took a showeae. Things during YT watching boobteen till 5 post meridium. Road to home 2h islam/reading dur.
Mo. Jaaa at 3-4 ante meridium. Send video that explained the existence of asexu
Tu. Jaaa (at 1 am), jaaa (at 4-5pm). two lesnz post evacuation. Bought 2 br, eggs. Oam at home. Pc sitting. F Ace Palm. FaaacePalm.
We. Manas
Th. Ubork, ate. pc sitting, faaa
Fr. Went to the physic culture's lesson. Got to mom after. Cooked fish
Sa. Drms? Decided go to practice and help to mom. Mom's things told. We got the medecine's supply. Got home in 2 hours(oof). 3 h-s trying to begin to cook macaroni's. Phone caled to get dressed up to road on Ramadan month's celebrating. Kentarou Kodzima Miyazaki, Silat.
Sd. Drmzzz. Bogged down the tik tok for 3 pm. Road by shop. Ate Kfc's chicken, burgers. Began chemistry's homework.
Mo. End the chemistry's hw at 3 am. Slept few. Dad salad, perumenis with a pepper. Read Chemistry's conspectus.
Tu. Worked out. Waka at 7 am, stomach felt bad more, minding's hard, a sip of water. Miura Kent's jump, ew. Mm dream. Tried to taunt reflux, no eaten. Felt peppy during the lessons, but the fuck as chemistry get's hard. I bought potatoes, carrots, onions, smetana, dark bread. Rubbed the shoes. Got eat, cooked soup. Read about Mennonites. Watched poot. Vids.
We. Weak things there. The Slow Russia. Typed this in less than 1h. The day without noisy stupa gayfish. Wrote the conspectus on lessons productive. Ga ham no one else around to looked at me, n no one (else?) was at home. Eaten egg sausage a long during looking for sniper pussy, then kukurusnuvsya in room while watch masasi kisi and lookin for sniper pussy in 3 h. Than smth kind of to lucidity trying's
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Bad, Butt, and Concussion: The Fart Chart howtobeadad.com DAD Common Quack Quacks can range from a mumble to a megaphone, but remember this duck always has really bad breath. Butt Putt More of a poking of wind, it's sort of cute and could easily be mistaken for a pixie popping bubble wrap. Slide Whistle High-pitched or low like a trombone, no one's dancing to these zigzagging notes, but everyone will be chuckling. Swamp Ninja This deadly air biscuit is too hot and thick to produce sound. Unclear if it's gas, liquid or solid, but beware: heat rises. Howler So loud and long you can't blame it on the dog. Unless it's a werewolf that lives on garlic and chili. Overachiever Shart alert! Sounds like someone stomped on a ketchup packet. This fart turned in extra credit, but the undies failed the test. Laughtulence It can be started by anything funny, but mostly by farts. The belly quakes of LOLs create sychronized FOLs (farts out loud). Gut Honk This happens INSIDE! Road rage in the traffic jam of one's tummy. It's rare and has none of the smell, but still has ALL the shame. Concussion Grenade Hopefully the boom warns you before the shockwave hits. Just hold your breath and call an O-ring repair doctor. Stat! Strangled Balloon Animal Doesn't even seem human. It's more like a modem connecting or a parrot getting a bikini wax. Scary! Even if it was yours.
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Travel Eats
Good news! Traveling has been scientifically proven to increase happiness, decrease depression, and chill you the F out. While it is important to be grounded, traveling is a big part of finding out who you are and what environment fuels your inner fire. Plus, experiencing different cultures is invigorating AF. So for all of you that want to get out and explore the borders of this world, I have put together a travel eats guide to all the fabulous food from your home base and beyond. Enjoy!
The Guide
$: least expensive
$$$: most expensive
Apothik Food Truck $
La Crosse, WI
Calling all Lax residents! Apothik Food Truck is a must try during the summer and fall seasons. The lovely humans behind the truck value: supporting local businesses and farmers while serving up delicious food! The menu changes each week to reflect seasonality and availability of different ingredients, so if you see something you like on the menu, make sure to get it while you can. You can find them at the Cameron’s Park farmer’s market, affordable and in walking distance for all you fellow college students.☺
My go-to: CHEESY MAC!
5 Cheese Sauce, Diced Tasso Ham, Fresh Herbs, Crispy Crumble, Diced Bacon
CINCO DE TACO
Chipotle Chicken, Chopped Kale, Roasted Hot Sauce, Lime Cilantro Crème, Pineapple Pico De Gallo, Melted Pepper Jack, Corn Tortilla
The Mint $$
La Crosse, WI
Oh you fancy huh? The aesthetics at The Mint are on point. Everything from the furniture, to the glassware, and to the food is practically flawless. Toto, I don’t think we are in La Crosse, WI anymore. This is truly an experience you do not want to miss out on. Teaming with The Root Note, The Mint is a farm to table restaurant serving up all the local goods right to your plate. If you are on a budget, I highly recommend taking advantage of Sunday Craft Cocktail night. The craft cocktails are only $5 and appetizers are on sale.
My go-to: CHARCUTERIE/CHEESE
Chef’s Daily Selections, Pickles, Mustard, Bread
A LITTLE ROSY
Letherbee Gin, Grapefruit Crema, Grapefruit, Rosemary Syrup, Peychaud’s Bitters
NAKED AND FAMOUS
Vida Mezcal, Yellow Chartreuse, Aperitivo Select, Lime
Howie’s On La Crosse $
La Crosse, WI
A La Crosse classic (most likely right outside your door step). Howie’s has great grub, drinks, games, staff, and an awesome patio. If you have not been I am honestly concerned. Oh, and do I even need to mention the bloody mary bar. YUM! Happy Hour is the perfect time to put down your schoolwork and head over for some student deals. I mean we are only students for four years, so we might as well soak up the discounts while we can. You are bound to run into some of your classmates working at Howie’s and most likely some of your professors throwing one back at the bar. There are enough TV’s at Howie’s that you will never miss a second of your favorite games.
My go-to: THE ALL AMERICAN
Cheddar Cheese, Bacon, Lettuce, Tomato, Red Onion, Garlic Mayo, Sweet Potato Fries
STRAWBERRY MARGARITA
Ecker’s Apple Farm $
La Crosse, WI
Because what is better than a caramel apple tossed in M&M’s? Ecker’s Apple Farm is stunning to say the least. Plan on spending the afternoon. With a beer garden, live music, apple picking, yard games, and plenty of grub you are not going to want to leave. Their mission is to bring you unique, quality craft beers from around the country and serve them up cold while you take in the view of the beautiful farm. I’M DOWN. It is a fall destination in La Crosse.
My go-to: M&M CARAMEL APPLE
APPLE PIE AND ICE CREAM
Black Coffee and Waffle Bar $$
Minneapolis, MN
Did someone say waffles? These waffles are like no other. They are seriously FUNKY and out of this world. The interior of Black Coffee and Waffle Bar provides an awesome space for students to chillax and enjoy a drink and a waffle. I mean, what could be finer? Every month they introduce a new specialty waffle. I promise, the drive is worth the overpriced waffle and the Instagram picture that comes with it!
My go-to: STRAWBERRY CHEESECAKE
Cheesecake, Strawberries, Graham Crackers, Whipped Cream
Hola Arepa $$
Saint Paul, MN
Started from a food truck now we here. The vibes up in this joint will take you away on a Latin destination vacation. The specialty here: Venezuelan stuffed arepas! Arepas are made from cornmeal dough, formed into patties and cooked on a griddle. Then, they are stuffed with meats, veggies, cheeses, and topped with homemade salsas! Their mission is to make food from scratch with a whole lot of love. I recommend sitting on the patio in the sunshine!
My go-to: FRIED BRUSSEL SPROUTS
Tamarind Vinaigrette, Housemade Chorizo Sausage, Pepitas, Caramelized Onion Jam, Manchego, Radish
CHIPOTLE CHICKEN AREPA
Tomato, Sweet Corn Salsa, Citrus Onion, Radish, Arugula, Chipotle Aioli, Yuca Fries
Pig Ate My Pizza $$
Robbinsdale, MN
Besides like the cutest name for a pizza place ever, Pig Ate My Pizza was named one of the best pizza places in the US by Time and Food & Wine magazines! They are serving up rotating craft pizzas and over 16 local tap brews! The atmosphere is unexplainably awesome, so you will have to go check this one out yourself. Checkout their website for a little sneak peak (the marketing is phenomenal).
My go-to: PIGGY PIE
Deep Dish Meat Lovers! Brioche Crust, Pork Lovers Sausage, Pepperoni, Bacon Emulsion, Toasted Black Pepper Fennel, Oregano
Velvet Taco $
Chicago, IL
Let’s taco bout it people! In the heart of the windy city, Velvet Taco is a counter service setting, whipping up some of the most BOMB margaritas and tacos on this planet. With over twenty varieties of tacos, they will assure that you have never had a taco like this. At Velvet Taco, food is art. Let’s go, the flavors await.
My go-to: FISH N’ CHIPS
Curry Mayo, Malted French Fires, House Shred, Beer Battered Atlantic Cod, Pea Tendrils, Flour Tortilla
BUFFALO CHICKEN
Crisp Tenders, House Buffalo Sauce, Danish Bleu Cheese, Ranch Crema, Carrots, Micro Celery, Flour Tortilla
Real Good Juice Co. $$$
Chicago, IL
Itching for something a little healthier to cure your Sunday scaries? You have found the place. Real Good Juice Co. serves up good juices and smoothies that are organic and locally sourced. The juices are cold pressed which means they retain 100% of the enzymes, vitamins, and minerals. The company is a huge supporter of Chicago’s Old Town community and contributes a percentage of juice sales to local charities! They don’t stop at serving juice. They also sell bowls, a variety of toasts, salads, and shots. It’s a Win Win.
My go-to: YUM YUM IN MY TUM TUM
Banana, Cacao, Almond Butter, Almond Milk, Honey
Firecakes Donuts $$
Chicago, IL
Hellzzz to the yeah! These donuts are on fire! Firecakes believes that everyone can use a sweet treat to get them through the day. With the craziest flavors, your taste buds will be wanting more. These donuts are fried in a large cast iron pot of oil over an open fire and sprinkled with all the sugar and goods one could ask for. They even have gluten free and vegan donuts!
My go-to: DONUT ICE CREAM SANDWICH
Summer House Santa Monica $$$
Chicago, IL
An escape to the warmth and laid-back vibes of the West Coast. The atmosphere is beachy AF. They promise that no matter the season, no matter the weather, you will be transported to the warmth of California at Summer House. I felt like I was Serena van der Woodsen from Gossip Girl, no lie. If you have ever dreamed of your bridal shower, this is that dream. To be honest I barely paid attention to my meal, I was too caught up looking around at all the VIBES.
My go-to: RICKY BOBBY
Hank’s Vodka, Fresh Grapefruit Juice, Lime, Strawberry Air
San Giorgio Pizzeria $$
Milwaukee, WI
Neapolitan pizza dough, made fresh in seconds, right before your eyes in a wood-fired oven! I have had a lot of pizza in my life, and this is by far my favorite. That is saying something people, you must go. The chef sits five feet in front of your table while throwing dough and firing up some incredible ZAA. Head Chef Gino Fazzari made this an unforgettable experience (he even bought my boyfriend and I special shots on the house). I would go back a million times.
My go-to: MARIA CARMELLA
San Marzano Tomato, Fresh Fior Di Latte Mozzarella, Prosciutto, Fresh Basil, Arugula, Extra Virgin Olive Oil
Logan House Coffee Co. $
Denver, CO
The vibes are too real people. This place is like an indoor farmer’s market. Make sure you give yourself enough time to really explore. The staff members are super DOPE and are jazzed about talking coffee with customers.
My go-to: NUTELLA LATTE WITH ALMOND MILK
Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory $
Vail, CO
I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream! You will never want to get ice cream elsewhere after trying Rocky Mountain. This is mainly because of the cones. Have you ever seen something so beautiful? In the heart of Vail Village you will feel like the cutest snow bunny with one of these cones in hand and the mountains right above your head. If you are a chocoholic you NEED to check this out.
Blue Moose Pizza $$
Vail, CO
Want to eat pizza while looking out at the Vail Village Slopes? Yeah, me too. This was some of the most exotic pizza I have ever had. Flavor overload in the best way possible. If you go during off-season you won’t even have to wait for a table.
My go-to: AUTUMN PIZZA
Sautéed Mushrooms, Truffle Oil, Parsley, Parmesan, Garlic, Olive Oil, Mozzarella, Goat Cheese
Finale
Now that your taste buds are basically exploding, it is time to get out and explore. Gas up your vehicle, book that plane ticket and Airbnb and be on your way. The flavors await! If you try any of my suggestions make sure to tag #vitabenedetta and let me know about the fabulous foods.
Until next time. What are some of your favorite travel eats? Comment below.
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I made palak paneer (amongst other things, post w/ tiny kitty coming up !) yesterday ! I thought I’d share some photos documenting the process as I find it actually lends itself to a wonderfully flavoured final product. And I have my own method of cooking it. By no means am I a cooking expert. I cook from memory of my childhood, things close to my heart tt make me feel at home. The measurements I’m using are for food for a week for my boyfriend to share w/ his Dad too. I save some for myself as well throughout the week. It makes quite a large batch by my standards. I also like things spicy so feel free to omit any of the chili I include.
A few more additionally things to address. I prefer to use whole spices when I can. Growing up, your family blended their own spices and rempah then stored it for later use in various dishes. This allowed you to control the flavour you wanted and you could create any blend you wanted. And families developed their own recipes and blends to pass down and share. But I know spices are expensive. To simplify the list of ingredients and reduce the steps, you can use pre-made garam masala spice blend. Essentially you can boil the ingredients down to : spinach, onion / tomato paste, yoghurt, garam masala and paneer.
Also I have the privilege of time, transport and the existence of Asian grocery stores to get these ingredients. Food is a lot cheaper there but also a lot of it comes w/o packaging and is not pre-prepared. So it does take time, effort and energy to prepare the ingredients even before cooking them. I cook once a week on weekends. I go to the grocery store on Saturday morning and spend pretty much the whole Saturday afternoon cooking. The cooking involves cleaning in between esp. if I’m using the food processor for multiple things. Then there’s the final kitchen clean up. If you guys have any questions or suggestions, feel free to reach out !
Ingredients for palak puree (spinach puree)
4 bunches of spinach
1 bunch of coriander
1 bunch of mint
6 bird’s eye chili (you can de-seed if you want to reduce spiciness - I just split it down the middle then I use scissors to snip them into tiny bits straight into the food processor)
Half a garlic bulb (more to taste if you’d like)
2 cm of ginger (I peel the ginger then slice on the thinnest setting on my mandolin then I roughly chop the slices)
Water and ice for the ice bath
Ingredients for the onion / tomato paste
2 to 3 chopped tomatoes (I used roma tomatoes bc they’re cheaper @ the store, any tomatoes would do, you can even use tin tomatoes if tt’s easier for you. Make sure to drain excess liquid from tinned tomatoes. If using fresh tomatoes and you want to ensure the paste is not too watery, you can omit the seeds and more mushy chunks)
1 small to medium onion (I quartered them then sliced the quarters w/ my mandolin then chopped the slices, white or yellow onion is fine)
Ghee or oil or butter to fry tomatoes and onion
150 ml of tomato sauce or paste from a tin
2 tablespoons sambal pedas (this is more spicy stuff so omit if you’d prefer. you can use from a bottle or prepare from scratch which is another recipe for another time. I always had some prepared from scratch growing up from my mum’s side of the family)
1 tablespoon tamarind concentrate
More garlic cloves sliced thinly if you’d like
1 or 2 bay leaves
½ teaspoon of cumin powder
½ teaspoon fenugreek powder
¼ teaspoon of tumeric powder
¼ teaspoon galangal powder
¼ teaspoon cardamom
¼ teaspoon cinnamon
1 to 2 teaspoons of chili powder (I used lal mirch but don’t worry if it’s not available to you)
1 tablespoon caraway seeds
1 teaspoon black pepper
50 ml water or broth (you can add more if you’d like to thin it out more)
Ingredients for yoghurt
64 g of whole milk, full fat yoghurt (greek yoghurt is good and seems to be the most accessible. I like to use goat milk yoghurt. not a yoghurt but you can use dahi too)
60 grams cashews (dry roasted or raw)
Zest from 1 lemon
1 tablespoon honey
Some heavy cream if you’d like to thin it out more
Ingredients for paneer
450 g of paneer (cubed)
Ghee or oil or butter to fry paneer in
Paper towel and plate to soak up excess oil
Method
Spinach puree
Rinse the spinach, coriander, mint. Chop off the stems from the bottom. Roughly chop the leaves so they fit in the pot better
Fill up your pot about ½ way w/ water. Bring to a boil, add a pinch of salt if you’d like.
Add the leaves in stages if you don’t have a big enough pot. The leaves cook down and become smaller. I did everything in 2 batches. Add more water if necessary.
Cover w/ lid and periodically check on it and smoosh it down more to make space for more leaves. Boil for 3 to 5 minutes or until blanched (not too soggy but not raw either)
Strain the leaves and immediately add them to the ice bath you prepared in a big enough bowl. Let them chill out for a few minutes. A mixing bowl works well. The ice water helps them keep their bright green colour.
Drain the leaves and put them in a food processor or blender with the chili, garlic and ginger. Process until smooth and well blended. Make sure to scrape the sides. If it’s not blending well enough, add some water but not too much or the end product could be runnier than intended.
Onion tomato paste
Dry fry the bay leaf and all the spices. Then take the spices and grind them together into a fine powder. (My roommate has a mini coffee grinder thing she uses for whole coffee beans. It works well for spices, just be sure not to put too much in at once which could jam the blades and affect how finely ground your spice mix will be)
In the same pan, heat oil or ghee or butter and fry the chopped tomatoes and sliced onions. Add in the sliced garlic.
Once everything is softened and you see tiny bubbles popping up and the fat is separating (as in the above picture) add the ground spice mix.
Dump the tomatoes / onion / spices into the food processor. Don’t forget to take out the bay leaf. Add the sambal and tamarind. Add the water / broth to the consistency you’d prefer. Blend everything together.
Yoghurt
Soak the cashews in small bowl of hot water until soft (usually 30 minutes is good)
Spoon yoghurt into food processor. Add lemon zest, honey and cashews
Blend until the cashews are in tiny bits. Add heavy cream to thin out and blend again.
Paneer (if you want it to be healthier or you’re scared of oil, you can skip the frying. just cube the paneer to the size you’d like and continue to “putting everything together”. when you buy paneer I think it’s ready to use)
Cube the paneer (some places do big chunks but I like smaller cubes)
Heat the ghee or butter or oil to fry the paneer until lightly browned or golden brown (I love a super crispy exterior and a soft, chewy interior) You can put a lid on the paneer and reduce the heat to let it fry w/o splattering hot oil everywhere. Make sure to move the paneer cubes around so tt one side doesn’t become too burnt. But don’t move them so much tt they don’t brown
Once it’s fried to your preferences, the paneer will be super hot so carefully remove it onto a plate w/ a paper towel. (I used a slotted spoon thing to scoop them out in batches. You can also dump it into a strainer but hot oil is scary)
Putting everything together
In a big enough pan start by adding spinach puree. Push it around until it’s heated up
Then add in the tomato / onion paste. Cook together for about 5 to 7 minutes on low to medium heat.
Lower the heat and add the cashew yoghurt mixture (you don’t want it to be too hot, risking the dairy curdling, also add in small amounts, don’t dump the whole thing in. I think I did it in 2 steps here). Depending how much yoghurt you’re adding, the colour will change.
Slowly stir until fully blended on low heat
Add in the paneer cubes
Stir together a final time and enjoy !
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