#fun with grammar

[friday411]

The world TOTALLY NEEDS a question comma!!

Is it useful? Cool looking? Fun? — YESSS!! One verb to rule them all!! 👏

Don’t you hate it when you have a bunch of questions that aren’t grammatically full sentences since they use the same verb so you have dozens of characters till you get to the question mark and you kind of just forget about it, despise it, get surprised and don’t use the right tone when you’re reading it aloud?

Who’s with me?

I love you dead punctuation marks.

[fox-and-the-hound]

What if Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy swapped cutie-marks, but their personalities stayed the same?

[dignitywhatdignity]

As a grammarian, I'm more prescriptivist than I'm entirely proud of.

I'm in favor of the singular "they/them", and I want to bring back "thee/thou".

[macksartblock]

idk why i did this instead of sleeping last night but ayo s3 pcs

[cryoverkiltmilk]

I am begging them not to change it, ever, but I'll still provide the context I tracked down.

Star Trek craft book, I am begging you to describe this craft project in literally any other combination of words

[kedreeva]

Giving unsolicited criticism on fanfic, even for like typos and shit, is like coming to someone building a sandcastle on the beach and telling them it's not up to code. Like no shit, Sherlock, I'm not trying to fucking live in it, I'm just here to have a good time. When I want an inspection I'll make an appointment.

[thunderc1an]

a kittypet ventures into the old wild cat territory

[syrupbitee]

free my boy from his own show he did nothing wrong

[bonchobrick]

So I’ve seen some posts going around about a ‘Bruce adopts Danny and everyone thinks they’ll finally have a normal family member—Danny is very not normal’ and here’s my late night take on it.

Or

Danny batfam au where they batfam tries really hard to keep their vigilante ass-kicking nightlife a secret from danny because he is ‘the only normal one in the family’ this becomes a problem however when danny gets kidnapped.

——-

The batfam all work together in a deeply serious family meeting to save their boy. After hours of combining their brains together they come up with a plan that will effectively save danny from joker, kick joker’s ass, and also make them look really cool while doing it.

So they bust in that warehouse, guns blazing, explosions fading in the background, a gust of dramatic dust covers the air

Batman steps infront of the rest of the team and demands to the blurry figure somewhere in the distance, “Where is Danny!”

The dust clears–they expect bad guys pointing weapons meancingly at them, they expect a cackle of a wicked clown amused at whatever plot he had planned coming to life, they expected a terrified boy perhaps tied somewhere likely siting in a chair that joker could present to the bats as a way of taunting them.

The dust settles–they observed their surroundings looking around and realize that, there are few new facts to be added into this ‘defeat the villain, get the bro, happy ending equation’

There is decidedly no weapons being pointed at them: In fact, all of the henchmen are already knocked out and tied up.

There is decidedly no evil laughs being echoed their way: In fact, the only noise that isnt coming from them is a light scritch scratch of a pencil

And there is decidedly no terrified little boy, there is a Danny however and he seems to be doing alright–actually scratch that.

Danny is doing wonders for the situation he’s in right now: In fact–

–Danny is sitting criss cross applesauce on-top a knocked out tied up Joker doing his algebra homework

The small blue eyed boy looks up at Batman's voice and visibly brightens, “Oh hey guys, I was wondering when you’d show up.”

Jason says with the utmost of comprehension, “...what.”

“So hi, I’m kinda new to gotham so sorry about beating these guys up, I think they’re villains? I dunno, anyways if you could take care of these guys while I call an uber home that’d be great.”

Danny sends them a blinding smile which would've been adorable if there weren’t a massive pile of bodies he were casually walking away from.

As Danny nears the exit he looks over his shoulder to the baffled group of vigilantes and blinks

“Oh yeah one last thing,” Danny rubs the back of his neck nervously, “Could you guys not tell the Waynes about this.”

Damian speaks up for the rest of his frozen family, albeit hesitantly, “I do think they have already been alerted of your kidnapping.”

“Oh no that's fine.” Danny starts nervously, “It's more about me being the… fighter… in this situation. I was just adopted by them and they seem really nice, I don’t want to scare them away being all grrrr im a scary monster boy and i love to hurt people argh.”

“I don’t think they’d think you're a monster.” Tim adds quietly

“Eh, tell that to my birth parents–they went psycho on me. Like evil scientist psycho, it was not as awesome as the movies make it sound, having scientists for parents.” Danny says bittersweet as he admits with a shrug

There is a moment of silence as the batfamily reevaluate the adoption file that states Danny’s family before they passed were very good people–albeit a bit excentric.

Dick blurts out, “Where did you learn to fight?”

Danny sends him an anxious chuckle, “I actually started when I was fourteen–my town always ran into some trouble so I had to step up. It’s part of the reason I moved here actually. I really don’t want anything to do with that hero vigilante life anymore…” The boy puts his hands together in a pleading motion, “So please don’t tell The Waynes!”

Bewildered at the situation as a whole they nod in a daze

The boys eyes widen at their easy agreement and he grins, “Thank you so so much! I’ve got to go now, it’s way past my curfew. but you’ll probably see me again next time I get kidnapped–I’ll make sure to put in a good word for you guys with my family bye!”

And just like that Danny slips off into the night leaving behind a family who were so sure they finally found a normal addition to their pack.

Jason sighs looking forlornly at the spot Danny had previously been standing, “You could just never pick the just semi-mentally healthy normal kids could you?”

Bruce groans pinching his the bridge of his nose

[non-plutonian-druid]

[ID: A drawing of Lila, Patch, and Five striding towards the viewer in varying levels of disgruntlement. Lila is in the middle, carrying a duffle bag and looking murderous. Patch is to one side, wearing heels and looking annoyed; and Five is to the other, carrying a gigantic rifle and looking calm but skeptical. Underneath are closeups of each of their faces: Patch is labeled "thinks these two are too violent". Lila is labeled "planned for a solo mission". Five is labeled "not letting anyone save his brother without him". End ID.]

From @sharkneto's fic Three's Company!! Diego's two girlfriends are off to save his sorry ass, and Five is there too

technically this is not so much fanart of his fic as "we had a conversation and he did a fic about it and i did art about it", but i've been waiting on him to post first so that he could give context and i wouldn't have to lol. let the word guy do the word part, amiright?

[friday411]

Thank you so much @amypihcs and @fruitviking for spreading the word/s!

@surlifen I thank thee for thy lesson in the grammar of our ancestors so that those in the community of living history who wouldst provide the truest picture of their chosen time are able to so.

This lesson of thine doth also help ensure that the masterpieces of literature and drama of the past are more understandable and enjoyable for modern English speakers.

Know that thy words of wisdom are spreading across the globe even now!

*** If thou art a native speaker of English that has learned it by ear and are unused to formal instruction, the advice that I give unto thee is to read or listen to the (salacious) first few books of the King James Bible and any play of Shakespeare’s.

Thou sayest thou hast not the time? Do thou note that through the miracles of modern science thou canst listen whilst thou dost thy housework.

😉

Post scriptom:

Pointing to the dropping of thee/thou/thine is a good argument to use in the defense of the third person singular. Grammar is descriptive and not prescriptive!!!

NO ONE knows how to use thou/thee/thy/thine and i need to see that change if ur going to keep making “talking like a medieval peasant” jokes. /lh

They play the same roles as I/me/my/mine. In modern english, we use “you” for both the subject and the direct object/object of preposition/etc, so it’s difficult to compare “thou” to “you”.

So the trick is this: if you are trying to turn something Olde, first turn every “you” into first-person and then replace it like so:

“I” →  “thou”

“Me” →  “thee”

“My” →  “thy”

“Mine” →  “thine”

Let’s suppose we had the sentences “You have a cow. He gave it to you. It is your cow. The cow is yours”.

We could first imagine it in the first person-

“I have a cow. He gave it to me. It is my cow. The cow is mine”.

And then replace it-

“Thou hast a cow. He gave it to thee. It is thy cow. The cow is thine.”

[phlondsbian]

WAIT can i just take a moment to say. i thought it was so sweet at the very beginning of the video when dan called them both himbos and stops himself and says "hold on ☝️ phil's not dumb he has a degree" like yes king set the record straight <3

[green-green-grass]

🎵 an inch away from more that just friends! 🎵

[lemongogo]

they should get to kill each other at least twice .i think

[purpleshadow-star]

And with this, I've joined the bandwagon.