#fuck those aunties

[ofallplaceswhythis]

tcoptp thoughts pt.20

now that we have reached a checkpoint i want to recap

the black brothers are talking

seameadows is happening (???)

lottie is doing WAY too much for a guy

marauders + lily being friendship goals

remus and tom may never talk again <3333

and theyre being scammed <3333333

a rollercoaster of sorts but atleast somethings are nice (cough THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP WILL GET US THROUGH cough)

......lottie?!!? does this count as grooming?? it should.

.....peter? i mean ik you're mad but that comment was UNCALLED

HOLY FUCKK THE PARENTS

FUCKING MUNDUNGUS FLETCHER ?@?@?!?!?!?#@?!SDFGSUG

God Sirius is really spouting those insults isnt he? 'sell your kidneys to make up for our loss' go off king

and HERE comes the downfall

NOT THE MOTHER

the black family angst is the only thing that has the capability to ruin me just because of the fact that they can "never change"

SIRIUS IS PLAYING THE PIANO! AGAIN!

THE BIKE THE BIKE THE BIKE! AND ITS NAME IS GISELA??

what the fuck is happening in this concert

remus fangirling over singers is valid. also where the fuck is sirius?

oh... not lee. fuck. wtf is he doing here though??

stop stop stop stop stop stop stop god wtf is wrong with them

REGULUS IS HERE YESDSFBDSGY8SD8GYASDGYSDIGHFIGUH (whose gonna tell him though)

....ORION?? ....good riddance...? idk how to feel about this though...

'son'..... i mean i expected it but they actually didnt do any research

god sirius is such a fucking mood

.....they're actually letting him play the piano???

REGULUS IS COMING WITH THEM FUCKING FINALLY DUIFSIDFI

what the fuck did they just do can someone please explain i dont speak british plss

i feel like peter falling deserves an honourable mention

unrequited sunseeker is tragic but this gives me the EXACT vibes when everbody thought that nico had a crush on annabeth but it was actually percy

regulus is the most unhelpful helpful person

midnight dancer is the shortest one?? kinda expected it to be atleast 6 mins

'bracelets' ??? do foreigners not know about bangles??

REGULUS AND ANDY YES!!!

PETER'S SPEECH

can i laugh. i really want to laugh. wtf is remus doing though 😭

SEAMEADOWS! those aunties can shove their opinion up their ass

[malachitezmeyka]

Existing in this world with the current political climate means kinda wanting to partake in the around the world Hatsune Miku trend but wondering if I'll be fucking crucified for Russian Miku

[cancerian-woman]

leave me alone while I think about how we never seen more child moments of Marcel with Klaus

[i-am-thevoid]

I think about that quote about indigenous people living in a post apocalyptic world everyday here, why are there no natives here, why does this town think its still in europe, why is there a land acknowledgment before the list of original settlers that make it seem like we're extinct, why am i the only indigenous person here and the only reason im here is because im working??? why am i the only indigenous person here and the only reason i am here is because i am working.

[samwisefamgee]

anyway played more baldurs gate 3 and can confirm it's d&d if you like less options and never having an interesting person in your party ever. and you can't even be fat. fuck off

[petrichoraline]

this is the funniest thing pleasee

[rabbitmotifs]

i always forget i have hyperpigmentation til i look at my elbow and then i feel like smashing my head on a rock

[1337wtfomgbbq]

I love how I have like maybe 3 days a month tops where my mind is like, "You know what, having a relationship and a kid would be nice."

Meanwhile the rest of the month I'm like...

Sees toddler have a melt down, thinks: Thank GOD I don't have a kid to try and raise and probably fuck up along the way.

Hearing about people's relationship drama, thinks: Thank GOD I am single and don't have to deal with that crap.

[merinelsa]

.

[baphofemme]

this is the last dream i'll post about today i promise!!

[prickly-paprikash]

Kendrick doesn't just hate Drake as a person. He hates the very idea of Drake.

Hip-Hop is rooted in revolution. In defiance. These are the songs of an oppressed group of people, and decades upon decades people have hated it. Accused of being meaningless and invalid. Media outlets took steps to belittle hip-hop and make sure it isn't recognized as an art form and as a means to fight back.

2Pac spoke of wealth disparity and inequality. Tupac was literally a member of a communist organization when he was younger and never stopped speaking against capitalism.

Lauryn Hill spoke of the struggles a woman faces. Not just women, but black women. Salt-N-Peppa. Queen Latifah. MISSY FUCKING ELLIOT.

N.W.A made sure people knew about police brutality and violence against the Black community.

And now, in this day and age, we're also experiencing an explosion of Queer Hip-Hop. Lil Nas X is at the forefront of this. Lil Uzi Vert came out as non-binary and uses they/them pronouns, even when they knew that a lot of their fans would never use it or even respect them for it. Auntie Diaries, a song about a young man who grew up in a transphobic environment and bought into those beliefs, but could never fully do it because his Uncle loved him so much and taught him a lot of life lessons, and that wisdom translated to him accepting his cousin as a woman as well.

Drake is none of that.

He's the perfect representation of what people think hip-hop is. Flexing. Posturing. Objectifying women. A fucker so insecure he bought 2Pac's ring just to feel like he's part of the black community. Rejected by Rihanna publicly. Tried to groom Millie Bobby Brown. Kissed and inappropriately touched an underage girl during his concert. His songs have inspired so many young boys to treat girls like shit. His belief that the amount of rings and chains and cars he has is the true meaning of success.

Additional Edit: This is my fault. If this post gains more views, then it would be remiss of me not to add to this. It was my fault to begin with, not stating this beforehand because while I did know, I got lost in celebrating Hip-Hop in a place that doesn't usually do so, and rightfully so.

2Pac did fight for wealth equality and better social living for the black community. He also has a long, long history of battery, domestic abuse, and sexual harassment against women. Specifically against women of color. He made a song to celebrate his own mother, but outright refused to give the same show of respect to other women in his life. His hypocritical nature was brushed off in later decades, just the way I did now.

N.W.A is the same. Sexual assault charges, violence—they spoke of Police reform, but refuses to give the same treatment back towards the women in their lives.

50 cent refuses to backtrack on any of his misogynistic lyrics.

Modern rappers of today, such as the dead XXXtentacion. 6ix9ine. Kodak Black.

I do love Hip-Hop. I love rap. And the music itself has always been anti-authoritarian at its core, because those are its roots. And I was happy that circles that did not normally know of it or enjoy it were getting into it, even for one thing like this rap feud.

Lil Nas X, Little Simz, Childish Gambino, Missy Elliot, Queen Latifah, Lauryn Hill—rappers who have at the very least consistently tried to put their money where their mouth is. Who have tried to act in accordance to what they rap and write and sing for.

@shehungthemoon @ohsugarsims finnthehumanmp3 were the ones who rightfully clarified in the comments. I know an apology won't correct my hypocrisy or my stupidity. I should have added all of this before making this post, but I wanted so badly to celebrate a genre of music but failed to do my due diligence in showing a better, holistic view of it. If anyone felt triggered, offended, troubled, frustrated or any other intense negative emotions surrounding this, please do block me. I'm sorry.

[madamechrissy]

Need a seatbelt when you Ride it

Cw-MDNI- Satoru x fem!reader, explicit, domestic smut

After ten years together and three kids, you and your husband Satoru are still as freaky as ever.

Dropping the three girls off with Auntie Shoko and Uncle Sugu, you immediately dive down and start sucking Satoru's cock as he drives that minivan neither of you wanted. Gone is PTA mom and soccer dad, replaced with Satoru whimpering as you slobber down his length.

'Baby f-fuck not gonna make it' he whines, big hand slipping down to rub you under your skirt over your tights, which you've soaked through, earning his groan. 'So wet, fuck you're a slutty soccer mommy'

You just moan around him, to the point your husband Satoru has to pull over, the side of some quiet street, pulling you by your hair off him, you look at his lidded blue eyes as you stroke his cock up and down. 'Need you, now Toru, please'

Satoru slides his seat back, leaning over and kissing you sloppy and messy, not sweet little pecks like you all usually do, no its dirty. He's spitting in your mouth when he yanks a titty out toying with your nipple, dragging you on his lap.

He's as eager as when you all met in college, and so are you, you're so excited your head bumps the TV system, playing dumb ass Coco melon the kids watched, you both laugh breathless. 'Please... need you in me'

'Lemme lick her' He rips a hole right in your tights making you gasp, slipping two fingers in your soaking wet cunt, your ass bumps the steering wheel, honking the horn and making you both blush and giggle as you look around.

'Can't wait. Lick me later' you take his cock and rub it against your slit. He cries out, cheeks dusted pink, while your hands entangle in his silky white locks, his hands on your hips firmer.

'Fine lemme taste you, at least. Fuck...' Satoru's thumb swirls your clit as you sink down on his cock, inch by inch, and fuck there were so many, stretching you, cunt gushing when he sucks you off his thumb, cheeks hollowing, blue eyes rolling back. His hands grip you hard then, yanking you down his length, filling you so good you are close from that. 'You're so tight'

'Fuck me, please, please' Soon your husband Satoru is pounding into your pussy, leaky tip slamming your cervix, and you're pretty sure you're not making those dinner reservations when you cumming for the third time and he's dragging you to the back of the minivan, as dumbass cocomelon plays and you're smashed against a bunch of toys and goldfish wrappers, but you really don't mind when he's cumming inside you again, whispering -

'Gonna put another baby in you, whole fucking soccer team'

Hcs of my man all domestic✨️

[jackklinemybeloved]

hmmm thinking about sean again. how he fulfilled his deal and just turned off his emotions in order to turn against the people he trusted and loved. but how he didn’t acknowledge or hurt marion the whole time. looking at the brother that he is betraying, losing, is too painful. he’ll shoot at his friend, a person he has worked and laughed with. he’ll knock out someone who has been like family to him and not give her words the time of day. but he can’t acknowledge that in saving his mother, he has to lose another brother.

[bigbootyloverentllc]

Aunt Charlotte… Want to see the full version?

😈💵 HMU #candid #bigbootyloverent

Backstory below:

Day 1: So I was riding around one day and notice my aunt charoltte walking, and in my head I’m saying to myself “damn! Aunt Charlotte got a big ass booty… l’m about to record it .🤳🏾” I then decided to pull up at the gas station to say hi, and I’m so glad I did. She was happy to see me and said I was looking good. After we spoke she ask if I can give her a ride back home, and I agreed. Once we made it to her house this is when I decided to get bold and ask her can I take a picture of her booty. She was like 😐 huh. I kept it real and said her booty been making me hard since I was a teen.

Day 2: Aunt Charlotte randomly texted me saying “Nephew. Now you know you shouldn’t have been touching my booty and saying and thinking that kind of stuff about me. I’m your auntie.” After I explain myself she just said “alright boy”. Some hours later I saw her walking again (if you haven’t notice, she doesn’t have a car). I pulled over and spoke, and asked her where she’s going. She seemed very irritated, so I asked her “are you good?”. Apparently she got into it with those people that she been living it, so she was walking to a room she got got for herself. I offered to give her a ride since it was just up the street. Once we arrived, I tried to make up an excuse to get out the car so I can record her walking. So I asked can I use the bathroom real quick. Once I use the bathroom I decided to get bold and asked can I just see her booty without the pants and take a picture. To my surprise, she agreed 😃

Day 3: Some months has went by and at this point IDGAF. I was in the area and just went for it. I texted and ask “can I fuck?… I already have seen you naked” she replied with “now you’re going to far. No you can’t”. But I wasn’t going to accept no that easy. With a few more texts sent pleading my case, she replied with “we can’t fuck because we’re family. But you can jack off and nut on my booty”. I said hey I’ll take it. Her people was out at the moment, so I had to be in and out.

[thebibliosphere]

Man, I was so proud of myself, getting ahead of my ADHD and scheduling for flowers to be delivered to my aunties and my mum back home in time for Christmas. I scheduled this over a month ago.

I even kept obsessively logging in to check that I’d actually placed the orders and not just let them sit in my cart.

I was on this. Despite all the brain fog and pain that’s been making me forget everything, I was on this. They were supposed to get the flowers today.

And then Marks and Spencer’s emailed me to let me know there’s been a delay in shipping and my orders won’t arrive until the 27th 🫠

This is one of those moments when I really have to fight the ADHD urge to throw my hands up and yell “why even fucking bother” because hnnnnng.

I cannot let this derail me. I still have shit to do for my niece and nephew. I cannot let this tank my executive function this week. I can’t.

Something being late doesn’t mean it’s any less thoughtful or appreciated. Something being late despite my best efforts doesn’t mean I shouldn’t have bothered. That’s the chronic perfectionism talking and I will not let it kill the vibes. The vibes are intact.

We’re going to have a holly jolly fucking Christmas or else.

[5sospenguinqueen]

Bedtime Stories | Daniel Ricciardo x Author! Reader

Summary: For the past six years, you've been dreaming of a future with Daniel. Until one silly little interview shatters every illusion.

Warnings: Swearing. Angst. Baby fever. End of a relationship. Daniel bashing.

Female reader with various faceclaims. Takes place in the 2022 season.

Main Masterlist

next.

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User 2 no, it's not an announcement. her best friend is currently pregnant and she was gushing about looking forward to aunty duties

User 3 omg her and daniel would make the cutest babies though

→ User 4 i bet she can't wait until they have their own mini-me

User 5 imagine our rom-com queen going from writing the cutest but filthiest fiction imaginable to writing about why you should eat your carrots

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22•05•22

User 6 i can't believe this man was talking about being in the height of his career when he's been nothing but a flop since leaving red bull

User 7 the way he's been stringing this poor woman along for 6 years, knowing how badly she wants children, to then decide in a random interview that he's never going to have kids because they would be a 'distraction'

User 8 fans spotted y/n running from the pits once she saw that daniel was safely done with racing

User 9 i fear we may be witnessing the downfall of something we once held sacred

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16•06•22

fallontonight just posted

liked by YourUserName, kellypiquet and others

fallontonight did you know @ YourUser Name was once chased by a kangaroo? find out how in tonight's episode of The Tonight Show 📚🦘

4,477 comments

YourUserName thanks for having me! ✨

User 11 excuse me, ma’am, reassess what

User 12 daniel has been absent from her last 3 posts

→ User 1 not even in the likes or comments

→ User 2 and he didn't even congratulate her on the recent book launch

→ User 3 ya’ll are reaching. he's busy racing. she's busy doing book promo. they still follow each other

User 4 anyone notice she didn't look as happy as she usually does

→ User 5 yes! and i swear she got teary when talking about her life plans 🥺

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YourUserName just posted

liked by maxverstappen1, mclaren and others

YourUserName my happy place 🌊🐚🦀 Aug '22

4,990 comments

User 6 does this mean a new book is coming soon

→ User 7 girl, we’ve just had one. let the woman rest

→ YourUserName sorry, my lovelies but i don’t think i'm in the right headspace to be writing a romance novel at this time

→ User 6 confirmation??!?!

→ User 7 we’re children of divorce

→ User 8 honestly fuck those two because i couldn’t have cared less about vroom vroom boys until mother started dating one and now i'm crying in class ‘cause they’re over

landonorris get that bread, queen 🍞

→ YourUserName who let you out of daycare

→ User 9 not y/n and lando interacting like she didn’t break his teammates heart

→ User 10 more like his teammate broke y/n’s heart. let's not make daniel out to be the victim here

kellypiquet p said get writing those children’s books so she can brag about aunty y/n to her friends

→ YourUserName my sweet girl. i saw the cutest dress the other day for her so I’ll pop round soon x

→ User 11 i love their friendship

→ User 12 get this woman a child. She’s too sweet to be stuck in cool aunt mode forever

User 13 anyone notice she didn't do her annual birthday post for daniel?

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04•09•22

User 14 no because the interviewer was so real for that. checo has a few children and he’s currently 2nd best. max is nowhere to be seen on the grid he's that far ahead and he makes sure p is his priority when she’s there so???

→ User 15 and the way he stormed out. i bet PR are sooo happy with him

User 16 nah because mclaren recently announced that they’re not extending his contract so he currently doesn't have his seat and doesn't have his y/n, all because he thought he was better than that

YourUserName posted a new story

danielricciardo posted a new story

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danielricciardo just posted

liked by landonorris, estebanocon and others

danielricciardo yesterday was something. p17 wasn't the result we were expecting, and the media were a challenge but it's always a delight to be in Suzuka. Moving on to the Americas

5,509 comments

User 1 maybe if y/n was there, you wouldn't have done so badly

User 2 maybe if he had a baby waiting in the paddock he would’ve had more incentive to do better

mclaren we’ll get them next time 💪

User 3 letting mclaren and lando down

→ User 4 the real reason he and y/n broke up is because he has no wins. she should move onto lando or something

→ User 5 he’s way too young for her

→ User 4 they'd make a good looking couple tho

(comments have been disabled for this post)

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19•10•22

YourUserName just posted

liked by charles_leclerc, bloomsburypublishing and others

YourUserName thirty, flirty and thriving. please enjoy a small snippet of my 30th birthday, organised by my favourite girl. these are the nice moments before she plies me full of cocktails and i become the sloppiest person in monaco tagged: kellypiquet

kellypiquet any chance to celebrate you 🤍🤍

→ kellypiquet and an even better chance to drink the entire bar and force max to carry us home

→ maxverstappen1 i'm just glad i was able to pull you both out of the sea before you drowned

landonorris can't believe you tried (and failed) to stop us from gatecrashing

→ YourUserName it was an exclusive event, we don't let randos in

→ landonorris i know you're joking but it still hurts my feelings

maxverstappen1 happy birthday, sloppy. you don't look a day over 40

→ YourUserName i'm gonna let that slide but only because i love the bag that kelly told you to buy

User 7 happy birthday to the best author

User 8 happy birthday queen

carlossainz55 happy birthday, y/n 💐

liked by YourUserName

danielricciardo happy birthday x

User 5 kelly and y/n look like the funnest people to hang out with

→ User 6 literally need to know how to become part of their duo

lewishamilton happy birthday, y/n. have a lovely night 💕

liked by YourUserName

mclaren happy birthday to papaya's favourite author (we're still waiting for a racing rom-com that is quite clearly about your favourite f1 team and their super sexy admin) 🥳🥳

liked by YourUserName

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Baby Fever Angst Series