#*blue. fuck autocorrect!
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yuehua8 · 2 years ago
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I apologize to anyone who was on my blog Twitter during Wrestlesanji bc HOLY CRAP I WAS LOSING MY FUCKING MIND
here’s some sketches that came from it pfft I was absolutely NOT EXPECTING MY OSHI TO WIN TWICE
Also the whole goddamn thing was a fever dream and a half I cannot believe Pomu Rainpuff from Nijisanji en’s first wave Lazulight beat Dwayne the rock Johnson
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mechahero · 11 months ago
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let that boy make himself a funny little creature persona!
textless versions and wips below the cut bc i thought they were cute
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byanyan · 1 year ago
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grey's accidentally byan energy thoughts: "wait can u get high smelling nail polish"
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autistic-katara · 21 days ago
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icl when it comes to gender i’m open to anything but when it comes to eye colour im strictly heterosexual
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baphofemme · 5 months ago
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this is the last dream i'll post about today i promise!!
#this one happened last week iirc#i was in this strip mall plaza that had two levels and every store there was perfectly cube-shaped#i met this stranger girl who was my age who had a shirt with 'I LOVE WEARING TUXEDOS' emblazoned on it#then suddenly kehlani materialized out of nowhere#i don't listen to her music but i've heard of her#she wore a shirt that said 'TUXEDO GIRLFRIEND'#i felt weird about being the third wheel in their relationship but they didn't seem to mind#my anxiety was alleviated shortly after that#i remember the three of us went to some nondescript store#the overhead lights were super dim and the rest were artificially bright and white#the edges of the walls that barely touched the top of the floor were painted navy blus#*blue. fuck autocorrect!#if i had to guess it resembled a hybrid of a walmart and a target; the three of us were goofing off in the electronics section#they got ahead of me because i walked too slowly so i used one of those rolling cart thingies to catch up to them#i almost crashed into one of the ceiling lamps and the store's owner (an older black lady) said “your ass better not break my lights!”#she could've passed for one of my aunties (my aunties are sweet as pie though)#thankfully i didn't break any but my clumsiness caused me to fall off the rolling cart; i survived unscathed#they rushed to me and asked if i was alright and i told them yes#i thought i embarrassed myself in front of countless strangers but no one seemed to pay any mind#*wipes forehead* holy shit that was a lot of writing#what's cookin' in hell's kitchen?#adventures within my amygdala
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luckyowl21 · 6 months ago
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Oh okay whew, I wasn’t a 100% sure if it was a flawless imitation or not, but the concept of everyone in Blue Lock TV sounding like text-to-speech literally kept me up at night
WAIT
The translators the Mojave Corporation invested/patented automatically translate languages into the users’ native language right?
D-does that mean that they are hearing the person’s voice *in* the listener’s native language (thus implying they’ve developed Ai voice modules so powerful it can mimick anyone’s voice perfectly) Or as they hearing a robotic/voice filter??
ARE KAISER AND NESS EXPERIENCING THE WORST MOMENTS OF THEIR RELATIONSHIP SOCCER LIVES BY ISAGI SOUNDING LIKE A TIKTOK FILTER TO THEM???
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andersonfilms · 8 months ago
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omfg i meant rayne gosh thats embarrassing autocorrect hates me but yeah sub abby and reader sharing a double-sided dildo
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crave | a. anderson
tags: eighteen+, wlw sex, penetration (r + abby!recieving), double sided dildo, mommy!kink, switch!abby but she's being a sub, desc of reader is vague so masc +fem!reader, yeah very close to ovulating so, but whimpering abby bc that needs to be a warning
a/n. real ones know i'm a sub!abby truther so this is for you just as much as it is for me. going to start working on requests y'all have sent me over the past few months. hopefully, the first of many to come. stay tuned!
DO NOT BUY TLOU, FUCK NEIL DRUCKMANN + EDUCATE YOURSELF + DAILY CLICK FOR PALESTINE + DONATE TO PALESTINE.
divider creds — @cafekitsune
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for once, abby is subjected the feeling she offers you everyday. it’s not only you whose moaning pathetically, it’s fucking her. she hates to admit it, fuck, she doesn’t even like moaning the way you’re making her. so fucking loud and desperate as her pussy clings around the cock while she’s trying to fuck you.
now, she understand why you can’t fucking talk whenever she’s fucking you because she’s having trouble uttering a word.
“are you good, baby?” you reach for abby, cradling her freckled cheeks in the palm of your gentle hands. you’re trying your best to make an effort, but it’s difficult.
she’s so deep, thrusting her hips into you deliciously, biting her pretty pink lips in concentration. blue eyes morphed to gray as she gives what you can take. it’s too much for you to handle. almost.
“yeah honey, i’m good. why wouldn’t i be?” she leans down to kiss your pretty lips. abby devours you completely trying to convince you she’s fine but then she whimpers.
quite pathetically.
“mhm, knew you would like it.” you say with a smirk on your face.
abby’s eyebrows furrow in annoyance, but it holds as much weight as a feather. you lift your hips up to meet hers causing her to mouth to drop open, a whimper of your name falling from your girlfriend’s lips.
“shut up.” abby grits her teeth as the cock wedges further inside her, moans bubbling in her mouth and she isn’t sure how much longer she can control it.
you can see the faint hint of a smile. abby knows you’re right but she would never admit. too proud to be a whimpering mess but you’ll get her there. the way her abs clench is a clear indication. this is fucking effecting her, not being able to focus on you. simply overpowered by the way her cunt is getting fucked.
for you, it’s a beautiful sight to see.
“not as easy to take as it is to give it, huh?” you move your hips up again, the dildo reaching further inside her cunt. strong thighs beginning to tremble.
“fuck, ah, shit baby.” abby begins to whimper like you’ve never heard her before. never this vocal to you, ever. it’s a beautiful symphony personally crafted for you. secretly, you hope this wouldn’t be the last time.
you needed more of her her, like this.
“oh? my baby likes being fucked like this? mommy’s taking my cock like a pretty little slut. being s’good.” abby’s trying to fuck you, fuck, she really is. but it seems impossible. tonight, the power shifted in the air and she can’t hide how much she loves it.
you’re used to this feeling and she’s simply not.
the blonde pushes herself further into you, letting the dildo slide deeper, until she’s hiding her face in the crook of your neck. gentle moans being smothered against your skin.
“fuck…take it, baby. wanna see my pretty girl cum. m’kay?” abby can’t control herself as her body shakes. you’re splitting her entire being in half. you’re so perfect for her. fucking her so unimaginably good, it feels like a figment of her imagination.
so, abby gives herself. she’s never done it before, not like this, but it’s done easily and without resistance. she lets herself groan at the fingers woven in her hair tugging at the root. she rests her hand on your waist gently instead of making a pretty necklace around your throat. she’s lost in whatever this is, craving to be fed more of everything you have to offer.
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reblogs are appreciated! ♡
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chaos0pikachu · 4 months ago
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4 Minutes and the Cinematography of Nipples
I said before that I thought 4 Minutes was pretty instantaneously the best looking BL on the market for 2024 after one episode. Which, not gonna lie, is a pretty big fucking claim. There’s been a lot of BL that’s come out that’s looked good, and I do think there’s been a steady improvement overall in the market in the last few years. Personally I think Japanese and Korean BL have a stronger production quality over a majority of Thai BL but like, if that’s a hot take I guess I prefer my food spicy. 
The point being~ if I’m gonna make such a hyperbolic statement, well I better back it up right? 
So I’m gonna break down a few scenes from the first episode, what I liked about them, why they worked for me, and why on a technical level I think 4 Minutes has just got it going on.
For better readability you can also check out this essay here.
Sidenote: my google docs kept trying to autocorrect “Bible” to “the Bible” and idk how to teach google I mean the hot Thai actor and not the book of Jesus. 
To start, I’m going to break down this scene featuring Great and his nepo baby cat: 
I thought starting with this scene would be good because it’s such a low-key scene and honestly making these simplistic scenes visually interesting is very difficult! But if you have the basics down, the foundations of cinematography and film making, these simpler scenes can be really memorable. 
Like yeah we’re all gonna remember this scene because shirtless Bible and oh my god Akira!? - I have only recently learned who Akira is; why is this cat getting a bigger bag than me? - but beyond that, what makes it cool to watch? What makes it interesting? What information does it showcase to the audience? 
One thing I added to the video was a grid for the rule of thirds. 
Rule of thirds is a shot composition technique applied to both film and photography. It’s the grid you see if you film a homevideo and helps a Director and Cinematographer figure out where to place the subject or subjects of the shot. The idea is the gridlines show you where you “should” place the subject(s) of said shot. 
Like everything, the rule of thirds is a guideline in filmmaking, not a hard and fast unbreakable rule. Filmmakers like Wes Anderson like to play more with central composition shots, rather than ROT. 
Anyway on to the opening shot, right after our credits and we’re moving into the shot. 
To start, the first thing I notice is the scene’s color grading. Color grading in film is the manipulation of raw film footage to create specific color tones throughout a project. Sometimes this grading is more pointed and obvious, think The Matrix, while in other films it’s not as obvious but still very prominent, think Killers of the Flower Moon. 
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It’s not that the before credits scene looks entirely, jarringly different from the opening scene, but the hospital scene is surrounded by whites and blue tones, it’s darker, and only a single source of light exists. It gives the entire scene a much more frantic, uneasy aesthetic but it’s not so far off from the darker muted tones of the next scene that it feels jarring or out of place. 
The second big thing I noticed in the episode is the use of aspect ratio. I’m not 100% sure what aspect ratio the production used exactly, but the use of widescreen as opposed to full screen in my opinion, gives the episode a more cinematic feel to it in comparison to other Thai BLs. 
Example, if you look at Century of Love (2024) it appears to be filmed in the standard full screen - which I believe is 16:9? - while 4 Minutes is widescreen (thus the black bars at the top and bottom). Widescreen can give a show a more “movie like” quality to it which is part of the vibes I get from 4 Minutes. 
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(source)
Onto Great’s actual introduction scene.
We’re not starting the shot with static movement, but with a camera panning right. I’ve talked about camera panning and such in BL before and it’s something I’ve found doesn’t happen as often as it should. Which is a shame! It’s such a simple technique but it adds so much. 
Imagine if we entered the frame with a static center shot, and then a cut to Great sleeping and turning off his alarm clock, and then another cut to above the bed. Think about how much more boring that could be visually. 
Instead, we enter the scene with movement, panning over and creating some interesting visual framing. 
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So here’s our opening shot, do you notice anything interesting? To start, what I like about this shot other than the panning movement in, is that we don’t see Great’s face yet. In fact we don’t see his face in full until about 30 seconds into the scene. This builds anticipation, yeah we all know what Bible looks like, but for the audience who doesn’t this helps build anticipation. 
Who is this character? What does he look like? What’s his deal? 
It also engages the audience more, if you notice part of the composition of the shot has Great in the mid-ground slightly blurred out, while the foreground emphasizes the things on his desk. He’s distant from us, the audience, sleeping off his hangover not yet ready to “join” the world yet. 
Here’s another two more things I like about this shot:
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Lines. 
Using lines and shapes can make a scene more visually interesting and invoke different feelings to the viewer. In this shot, I get a sense of symmetry, the camera panning right, lightly drags across the screen alongside the lines below and above Great, almost creating a frame within a frame effect. As if Great is boxed into a clock in and of itself. 
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You can also see the use of balance in the scene as well, connecting back to that visual theme of symmetry as well as blocking our view of Great’s face. The lava lamb and champagne bottle are almost the same height, which helps create balance in the shot. The champagne bottle informs us Great has been drinking or does drink since it’s positioned so close to his bed, whilst also continuing to hide his face away from the viewer. 
I also like that the lava lamp is a bright spot of color. The tone of the scene is mostly muted greens, and gray, but the bright orange lava lamp and even the pink champagne bottle draw our attention but don’t overwhelm us either. It provides the scene with some warmth but doesn’t offset the overall tone of the color grading. 
And then, the last bit of this shot:
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We have Great knocking over the champagne bottom, and turning off his alarm clock. Notice that the alarm clock and the champagne bottle hit those ROT dots almost exactly. There’s also the use of lines by the length of Great’s arm - I just forgot to add a line I’m a failure, a fake, fml - we see him knock over the bottle, and then we follow the line of his arm directly to the alarm clock which is also a shape, a circle. 
I like that they used a clock with a specific notable shape, since by the end of this scene the clock is relevant to the story as a whole. Using a shape makes the clock more visually noticeable and memorable to the audience. 
So in the next cut we’re above Great - just like Great’s gonna be above Tyme, fuckin hell I’m corny - in a medium-full shot and there’s a couple things I really like here. 
I really like the use of lines here with the bed going in one direction but Great’s body going another. It’s disconcerting, and off kilter a bit. 
The use of patterns plus the opposing symmetry, whereas in the previous shot the lava lamp and champagne bottle were providing balance, here one side of the bed is patterned, while the other isn’t. This creates a sense of imbalance and makes the shot more visually interesting.
This medium-full shot at a high angle makes Great smaller, and continues to showcase his dishevelment, keeping him distant from the world itself. Also notice the lack of color here as well. 
What could this say about Great as a character? Or his story? 
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So this next cut is the one that actually inspired me to write this essay to begin with and know what I’ma eat some crow here. I originally said it was a great ROT shot but I was wrooooooong. It’s definitely a center composition shot. 
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Notice as well, the bed itself is its own shape - rectangle - center in the frame, and yet the shot almost looks unbalanced again because of that singular patterned rug. It’s the only pattern in the entire shot, not even Great’s pillows have noticeable patterns on them. 
The above view camera angle in a full shot creates almost an omnipresent feel, as if the audience - or something else? - were looking down upon Great. Whose face we still haven’t seen! It makes him smaller, less powerful, and almost vulnerable. Shots like this are often used in horror films like James Wan’s Malignant (2021) where the horror spector will be looking down above the would-be victim. 
Another thing I like about this scene though is we have Great moving. It would be simpler and easier to have his phone just by his alarm clock, or under his pillow, but think about how much more visually interesting it is that he has to move down the bed and reach for his phone. It creates action in an actionless low stakes scene. 
And now, 30 whole seconds in and we’ve finally seen Great’s face! 
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Fun fact, with the ROT grid the gridlines fall right across Bible’s nipples. That’s not a film analysis, just something I noticed entirely intentionally. Thanks Madam Director Ning Bhanbhassa Dhubthien.
The actual shot is in center composition again, as Great rolls over and reveals his face the camera begins to zoom in. 
This creates movement in the scene instead of leaving the camera to statically observe it’s now, finally, inviting the audience to meet Great. Pulling us in towards him whereas before we were kept at a distance. Great’s awake and, well as ready to meet the world as somebody with a raging hangover can be. 
I also like how Bible is moving constantly in this scene; he rubs his eyes and nose, he twitches his fingers, titles his head back and forth, etc it’s nothing revolutionary but it’s appreciated. 
When the scene cuts, we get this shot: 
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I didn’t put the red dot on his nipple, it just landed there. This is all Madam Director Ning chepie. 
But you can see how Great’s body is landing on all those gridlines pretty solidly. Also in the background we see his alarm clock again, a bright blurred circle in the distance. I also like the angle of this shot, as it creates depth in the frame, with Great’s head being in the foreground his lower body in the mid-ground and the background blurred out. 
What follows is Akira appearing in frame. Which was really difficult to capture so I don’t have a screenshot. But what I really like is Akira entering the frame out of focus. They could have just cut to Akira, but instead they opted for Akira to enter the frame which is more interesting. 
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When we do cut, Akira is firmly on one of those dots so we don’t miss them in the frame. I think it’s also interesting that we’ve pulled out again, into a mid-full shot, hanging above Great, and we see that clear symmetry line again between the patterned rug and the regular carpet. 
I also really love that when we got to Great sweet-talking Akira and feeding them we’re not just doing a cut, we’re panning downwards which continues to add movement to the scene. And we get that moneyed sponsor shot! 
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Durex can’t pay for everything okay?
So in the final bit of this scene we get focus on Great, who’s in focus, before he gets up and leaves the frame where the camera then focuses on the clock behind him. 
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See how in the first frame the background is all blurred out, but once Great walks out of the frame - again, great that he walks out, movement!! Y’all don’t understand how boring 1000 Stars was for me to watch because of the lack of this stuff okay? - and then the focus shifts to the clock. Which is round. 
God I know that sounds so dumb, but imagine the clock without that ring light bit on it, it’s just a tiny little rectangle. Not as fun or interesting to look at right? Or as noticeable especially from a distance? 
This shift in focus also tells us “this is important” whatever “this” is. The subject of the shot goes from Great to the alarm clock but they are positioned as equally important. We’re meant to pay attention to this seemingly innocuous item, which we learn later in the episode is time. We’re meant to remember and note that time will be important to the story - I know with a title like 4 Minutes you’d fucking hope time would be important but have y’all ever read Youtube comments? It’s rough out there for visual comprehension okay? 
So all in all this scene is only 1 minute and 40 seconds give or take. It’s very short, but I don’t think it was boring at all. I think it’s a really solid introduction to a main character. Think, Korn didn’t get this much time to showcase his introduction, his scene is shorter - though also well done - which showcases which character is more of a story priority. 
This scene eases the audience into the story, inviting us to wake up into the world like Great is. It uses techniques like lines, shapes, symmetry, color and focus to make what could be a very boring scene into an interesting one. 
There’s so so much I probably and certainly missed, I’m far from an expert, but I hope I was able to articulate what I liked about this scene, and why I think it looks good. 
Stay tuned for more if I can manage to focus long enough to breakdown more scenes lol
Also red dots on Bible’s nipples are just funny to me it be what it be. 
Further Reading: 
Composition in Cinematography / THE LAST OF US
Center-Framing vs Chaos-Cinema: Mad Max vs Transformers
Camera Framing: Shot Composition & Cinematography Techniques Explained [The Shot List, Ep 2]
The Ultimate Guide to Camera Shots (50+ Types of Shots and Angles in Film)
Color Grading 101 - Everything You Need to Know
Mixing Film And Digital Footage: Killers Of The Flower Moon
In Praise of Subtle Cinematography
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misserabella · 2 years ago
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pls tell us you're doing part 2 for that sexting fic you posted for ellie
you guys loved it and i’m more than happy to bring you more of…
sexting with gf! ellie williams! ☆ (pt.2)
pt.1!
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cw; +18 content! minors dni!, sexting, suggestive messages, public space (library), voyeurism(??), fingering (r! receiving), teasing, cum eating, mentions of strap on and actual sex, heavy make out…
baby
yeaaah?
i’ve had such a bad day
oh no, what happened?
i got late to my first class and the teacher didn’t let me in. had to wait around for two straight hours until math. and the motherfucker even started explaining something new about quantum knowing fully well i wasn’t there just to fuck me up! now i’m behind. fucking shitty old man. hope his asshole goes lose and he shits his pants one of these days.
shit. i’m so sorry els :(
is there anything i can do to make you feel better?
well you could start by opening those beautiful legs up, baby
you frowned, and when you looked away from your phone you met ellie’s standing figure. she had come to pick you up from the library to drive you two back to your shared apartment, and she was looking at you with those eyes that you knew meant trouble.
ellie…
nobody’s here baby. just you and me.
you blushed, and she smirked when you slowly and carefully parted your legs, your skirt rilling up and showing your beautiful blue panties.
just like that. good girl. fuck. you look so innocent… but i know you’re not and that makes me weak asf.
you giggled, feeling heat pooling on your cunt.
come here els
can’t. the view is really nice from here.
you huffed. but still thought of a way to get her closer. she looked so good today. with a pair of grey sweats and a white tank top that held her tits just perfectly. you wanted them on your fucking mouth.
you bit down on your lip as you looked into her emerald eyes, and softly, one of your hands reached for the crotch of your panties to pull them aside and give her a perfect view of your pussy, which was starting to shine with slick.
her eyes widened, and you tried to stifle a laugh. she composed herself with a cough and typed a new message.
i wanna fuck you so hard you leave my back full of scratches and my sheets completely soaked.
hey* i meant hey. fucking autocorrect…
you smiled at your screen, rolling your eyes.
ellie come on… stop with the teasing. i need you.
you sighed when one of your hands cupped your cunt, your fingers against your clit. she swallowed hard.
teasing you is what i’m best at, sorry babe
“els…” you whimpered for her, making her whole body shake.
fuuuuuck. you could make me do anything with that voice.
then come here and fuck me.
you’re not gonna be able to stay silent baby. you’re too loud when i’ve got my fingers stuffed inside you.
then keep me silent.
shit
u make me crazy.
gonna let me touch here baby? where anyone could come in and see how good i make you feel? gonna be my good girl and let me finger you on the library?
your heart hammered.
yes please ellie, want you so bad….
next thing you knew, ellie was pulling from you to get up and drag you to the most hidden part of the library, in between shelves stacked with books. she was kissing you as if you were fucking oxygen, and one of her fingers was plunging inside your cunt. you couldn’t help but moan, making it easy of her tongue to slip inside your wet and warm mouth.
“fuck. you’re so fucking perfect….” you whimpered, taking now her second finger. it was always the perfect stretch, her fingertips pushing against your g spot to make you see stars. “the second i get you all alone i’m gonna fucking dick you down. gonna make you cum over and over again. shit. i can’t wait to see you crying as you ride my cock. you always get so fucking needy for me baby.” her free hand was massaging your tit from under your bra and shirt, pinching you nipple and making you squirm.
“ellie…, please…” you moaned, out of breath, your hips rolling and fucking down against her fingers as she kissed your neck, leaving marks behind. shit. she always knew how to get you all desperate for her. needy of a good fuck.
“gonna fill you up so nice. and then i’m gonna clean up all the mess with my tongue. it’s so unfair. i swear i have your taste on my tongue right now. wanna make you make a mess out of my face.” you let out a loud whimper that had her kissing you to silence you. your walls were tightening around her fingers, and you could feel that well-known warmth spreading all over your stomach. the wet squelches of your pussy had ellie smirking. “you gonna cum baby? gonna be a good girl for me and cum all over my fingers?” you nodded, your nails digging on her naked shoulders. “atta girl. go ahead baby. soak me up.” you ears rang as you fell apart, slick gushing out of your cunt as ellie kissed you to keep you quiet and fucked you through it in and out with her large and slim fingers.
you were left with wobbly legs and rosy cheeks, your breath heavy as you watched ellie suck her fingers clean, humming.
“feeling better?” you teased her.
“oh yeah. but now i’m definitely starving.” her eyes shone with lush and you trembled. “let’s get out of here, hm? before i fuck you with my tongue and get kicked out of college.” you smiled, and took her hand to let her lead you out of the library. your pussy still felt sticky underneath your panties, but you couldn’t care any less. ‘cause you knew ellie would get on her knees for you once you get home and take care of it with her mouth.
-
a/n; jeeeesus. do you guys want a pt.3 of sexting with gf ellie with heavy sex?😵‍💫
also… ty guys sm for the 4k! love you!
part 3!
ellie williams masterlist! <3
xxx
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taergalive · 6 months ago
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Even More Incorrect Radioapple Quotes to Fill the Void in My Heart
Lucifer: Can you please be serious for five minutes Alastor: My record is four, but I think I can do it -- Lucifer: I made tea. Alastor: I don’t want tea. Lucifer: I did not make tea for you. This is my tea. Alastor: Then why are you telling me? Lucifer: It is a conversation starter. Alastor: That’s a lousy conversation starter. Lucifer: Oh, is it? We are conversing. Checkmate. -- Lucifer, tending to Alastor's wounds from his fight with Adam: How would you rate your pain? Alastor: Zero stars. Would NOT recommend. -- Lucifer: I want to wake up with you every day for the rest of our lives Alastor: I wake up at 4:30 AM Lucifer: Lucifer: I want to see you at some point every day for the rest of our lives -- Lucifer: If there's going to be a big dramatic scene, wait until I get back. Alastor: Of course. I can't flip this table by myself. -- Lucifer: I turned out perfectly fine! Alastor: Lucifer, this morning you thought a ghost made your toast Lucifer: I��DIDN’T PUT THE BREAD IN! YOU DIDN’T PUT THE BREAD IN!!! -- Lucifer: Can you keep a secret? Alastor: Do you know anything about my life? Lucifer: No I do not. Good point. -- Alastor: Look. I may not be a saint, but it's not like I’ve killed anybody important. I’m not an arsonist. I’ve never found a wallet outside of an IHOP and thought about returning it but saw the owner lived out of state so just took the cash and dropped the wallet back on the ground. Lucifer: Okay, that's really specific, and that makes me think that you definitely did do that. -- Lucifer: Hey Alastor, have you seen the reporter? Alastor: Nope. Have you seen the meat tenderizer? Lucifer, confused: What? Alastor, grabbing the meat tenderizer out of the drawer: No reason, cute girl things! -- Lucifer: Alastor and I were crossing the street, and this dude drove by and honked at us Charlie: * Sighing * What did Alastor do? Lucifer: He chased him to the next red light, then reached into his window and... Alastor: Who wants a steering wheel? -- Lucifer: What time is it? Alastor: I don't know; pass me that saxophone and we'll find out Alastor: * Plays sax extremely loudly* Husk: WHO THE FUCK IS PLAYING THE SAXOPHONE AT TWO IN THE MORNING?! Alastor: It's 2 am - Lucifer: I told Alastor his ears twitch when he lies. Charlie: Why? Lucifer: Look. Lucifer: Hey Alastor! Do you love us? Alastor, covering his ears: No! Charlie: -- Lucifer: Why are your tongues purple? Angel: We had slushies.I had a blue one. Husk: I had a red one. Lucifer: oh Lucifer: Lucifer: OH Alastor: Alastor: You drank each other's slushies? -- Alastor: Imagine being under 5’4’’ and thinking you have rights hahaha couldn’t be me. Lucifer: You wanna keep those kneecaps you better shut the fuck up! Alastor: I’m sorry, I can’t hear you from all the way down there, can you repeat that? Lucifer: I SAID FUCK YOU BITCH -- Lucifer: When are we gonna fuck? Alastor: What? Lucifer: Oh sorry autocorrect. When are we gonna hang out? Alastor: First of all, those two words aren't even close to each other. And second of all, this is a verbal conversation... -- Lucifer: As top in this relationship, I think we should- Alastor: I can't believe you're pulling rank on me. -- Lucifer: You have to apologize to them Alastor. Alastor: Fine! But I must warn you that this might make me a better, nicer person and that is NOT the person you fell in love with!
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writefightandflightclub · 1 year ago
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“Yes man” (Cecil Dennis {fuck me, how did I get here} x fem!reader)
Summary: Blurby McBlurbFace. Mainly chat, slight fluff, smut, pining / friends to lovers vibes.
18+ ONLY MINORS DNI
Warnings: alcohol consumption; drug use mentions (weed); smoking; dumbification of Cecil, I guess. Mommy kink if you squint. Public erections / handjob sorta, premature ejaculation / cum in pants. Mentions of dead fish but no fish were harmed. Actually, a surprising number of animal metaphors. Oops. Rimming I’m sorry that one snuck in very last minute Omg.
A/n: having a shitty mental health day (boo) and this Cecil blurb (whilst not my best) is my self-care ☺️ I don’t remember his character well aside from wet bloody cat boy, but I’m damn sure not rewatching that again so this will have to do 😅. Feedback appreciated! 🧡 (Is the rimming too much? 🙈) Not proofed and I’m almost positive autocorrect will have screwed me over.
Also totally inspired by @my-secret-shame’s meme and @foxilayde’s amazing blurb. I will not pretend to have had an original idea! 🧡
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“Come onnnn, Cecil,” you whine, poking him in his soft belly with your index finger. He giggles lightly, almost like a hiccough. “It’s always me coming up with the ideas. What do you wanna do next?”
He turns his head as though in slow motion. Moves as if he’s underwater, this one - at least when he’s got food and several beers in him (which is most of the time). He looks up. Blinks at you; dumbly. “What do you mean?”
Eh. You’d really thought your statement had been quite clear.
You resist the urge to pinch his cheek and tell him It’s a good job you’re pretty.
“I mean, that I suggest things, and you go along with them.”
He blinks again. It’s like everything is just a little slower in Cecil’s world. Takes a little longer to filter through. It’s refreshing, in a way. He’s in no rush, and it encourages you to slow down too. To smell the roses.
Cecil is beyond easy-going, come to think of it. Goes with the flow like a dead fish. You’re pretty sure, in fact, that he’d go along with just about anything. With just about anybody’s hare-brained schemes, without once thinking through a single one of the potential consequences.
Scratch that - he probably already has done just that; which would explain a lot of the trouble he’s routinely gotten himself into since you’ve known him.
Though, you suppose, in a way that’s refreshing too. You always did worry too much.
Besides, he always seems to muddle through, somehow. Though quite how has you stumped. It’s hardly due to his charm or his smarts, now, is it? Even so, despite whatever attributes he is lacking in, you can’t deny that he must be doing something right. Trouble simply seems to slide right off the man’s back. Like water off a… well. A dead fish, you guess. What a versatile metaphor.
He blinks at you again. Maybe those big pretty cow eyes help, just a teency bit, to get him out of trouble, you would wager.
Look at him though. You’ve never seen anyone more relaxed. Practically horizontal as he’s hunkered down in the booth, seated next to you in the corner of your usual dive bar. Maybe there’s something to be said for all the pot and seedy hotel room fucks he indulges in. You bet his shoulders are inordinately loose. Maybe he really does have it all figured out, despite appearances.
As you ponder this, Cecil -eventually- makes a non-committal noise, before his bloodshot, glassy eyes flick back to the TV hung up on the wall. He is barely even watching it. Just letting it happen to him, like he does with most everything else.
That’s probably why you’ve never fucked him, you realise, like a bolt out of the blue. He’s pretty, sure. But you wouldn’t.
You don’t mind control - that’s not it. You don’t mind taking charge. But with Cecil? You think he’d take it lying down - a little too literally. If you’d ever suggested you and he fool around, you’d never know for sure. Never know if it really was his idea - a thought or desire he’d ever had before - or if he was simply far too agreeable and opportunistic to decline. So agreeable, that he’d let you ease your vagina up and down on his cock until you came on him. You were intrigued by the thought, sure. But you refused to go there simply because Cecil couldn’t come up with anything better to do.
You look at him, and immediately bat that thought - the vagina all over cock one - away though, as you regard his complete lack of gumption. It’s tangible. Look at him now, for example. He’d seemed to like the way the air from his non-committal noise had filtered over the neck of his bottle, tucked under his folded chin. Indeed, he is now pursing his full, curvy lips, and blowing over the mouth of it until a soft series of “hoots” fill your booth.
You fold your arms and sigh.
You reckon that will amuse him for the next ten minutes at least, so clearly, once again, Cecil’s not the one coming up with a plan for the remainder of this evening.
It’s not that you ever really have to do anything with Cecil to have a good time. It’s just that, tonight, you’re antsy, and it’s making your thoughts wander in directions. Down below his zipper directions, so help you.
“Beer’s empty,” Cecil states flatly, finally noticing after sucking on the bottle for a mo, poking his wet pink tongue around the rim like the little wet cat boy he is. Cute though. Does things to you.
Anyway. You register his statement, but you observe that no action follows. He doesn’t look at all like he plans to do a damn thing about it.
You decide to test your theory, then. Your theory that Cecil’s simply a dead fish swept along in your river. That maybe he doesn’t even want to be here at all. Never did. That you are just another something that happened to happen to him.
“Do you wanna go get Mexican?” you offer, with ulterior motives Cecil is not shrewd enough to pick up on.
His eyes tick back from the captivating, shifting lights of the TV. “Sure,” he smiles softly at you, perfectly content, it seems - and yet, you are less than satisfied.
“See!” You smack the palms of your hands together in triumph, and he jumps. Pushes himself up a little straighter in the seat, his palms disappearing into the worn, lumpy upholstery. “See what I mean?”
He blinks at you blankly. Again.
Clearly not, then?
“You just go along with anything I say. We ate two hours ago, Cecil,” you complain, recalling the all you can eat Chinese buffet you and he had gorged on with two coupons you’d cut out of the newspaper. You drop your hands to your lap, dejectedly. You’re getting agitated with him, which surprises you, in truth. And still… there Cecil is. Unflappable. Calm. Constant. There are pros to his cons, for sure. “I just… I never know if you actually like what we’re doing, you know?”
“But. You always suggest things I like. So why would I say no?” He shrugs a little. “Tacos are good. I like tacos. I like…” he hoots into his bottle again as he says the word. “You-ooooooh.”
You hate to admit it, but his answer has you stumped for a moment. Cecil’s statements may generally be simple. Uncomplicated. But they can be oddly profound at times.
Christ. Maybe… Does the man actually have a valid point? Or, perhaps you’re looking too hard for meaning in his words - it’s possible. You feel like you’ve spent a lot of time lately looking hard at Cecil, perhaps to justify your bizarre and inexplicable feelings.
Possibly you’re even projecting. His seeming lack of independent willpower would certainly make that easy enough to do.
Maybe the man has a point though. Maybe he’s not as “easy-going” as you think he is. Maybe you’re just coincidentally so attuned to his desires that he’s never had cause to deny you. Maybe you are aligned with his desires. One and the same. “What if I asked you to do something you didn’t like, then?”
You slurp up the dregs of melted ice through your straw and Cecil blinks again as though it’s taking all of his processing power. Damn, though. You’re surprised that the fanning of those endlessly long cow lashes didn’t cause the curtains behind you to billow in the breeze they threw up. “Like what?”
You shake your head. Touch his arm to placate him. “Never mind, Cecil.” Christ. If he can’t even think of a single Thing He Wouldn’t Like, maybe you can safely stick to your dead fish hypothesis. It’s all the same to him. Just happening to him. He’s not choosing you.
That particular thought, when it arrives, niggles you more than expected, but you quash the growing agitation which rides in alongside it.
Meanwhile, Cecil looks around, quite visibly thinking. “I wouldn’t get up outta this seat,” he states adamantly, his voice croaked from all the blunts he’s worked through today. “I wouldn’t like that.”
You believe him. He’s practically sliding down to become a puddle on the floor. Dissolving into the bar furniture; becoming one with the upholstery.
Your lips curl up into a tender smile, remembering one particularly ridiculous night at Cecil’s. The night involving a 3am bong sesh, culminating in him genuinely believing he had merged with the couch, becoming a half-human half-upholstery monstrosity. He had waved the two huge, puffy couch cushions around as though they were his arms, and he’d grabbed you up in the middle of them like a grilled cheese, sandwiching you and taking you down to the floor where the two of you had rolled and laughed until you’d cried.
When the laughter had subsided to only the odd titter here and there, and you had lain on his disgusting rug almost nose to nose? That’s the first time you’d wanted to kiss him, and it turned out not to have been the last.
Fuck. You are rather fond of this idiot, aren’t you? How the fuck did that happen?
Engaged fully now though - slightly more lucid than your fond memory- Cecil sits up. Still slouched but this time over the table, his forearms bracing him against the surface. As he moves, you get a waft of his layered, stale cigarette smell. It’s… confusing, in its appeal. Should be off-putting, but you find, in fact, that it’s a comfort.
“No? You don’t wanna?”
With a rush of affection you link your arm through Cecil’s, and he slumps his head on to your shoulder as though it’s the most natural thing in the world.
You weren’t ready for the way his knotted curls brush your cheek, and it inspires a similarly dense and tangled knot to form in your middle.
“No.” It’s the most sure you’ve ever heard him sound. “I don’t wanna get up.”
“A minute ago we were going for Mexican food, Cecil.” There’s a beat. “That kinda involves movement, you realise?
He swivels his head towards you then, gaze all doe-eyed and pathetic, and the proximity of him parroting on your shoulder knocks you for six. “You mad at me or something, Hottie from Walmart?”
You snort. He doesn’t always pull out that nickname for you - how you’d been known to him before you had been known to him - but it always makes you sentimental when he does.
He shifts from you then, tilting his body towards you. Scrutinising you with apprehension in his sweet face.
Fuck him actually, and fuck his pouty beautiful kissable lips most of all.
You sigh, and you deliberately soften your face. He’s easy-going, sure, but he’s sensitive. Trouble slides off of his back, but other things… other things don’t slip off quite so well, and he often gets like this. Like he’s done something wrong, when he hasn’t.
You actively resist the urge to coddle him. To tenderly rake his somewhat grimy but beautiful curls off of his forehead.
You hardly want to examine the fact he brings out your… motherly instincts; but it doesn’t escape your attention that he always seems like he’s craving just a little nurturing. You want to take your thumb and smooth out the creases in his troubled brow.
“No, Cecil. I’m not mad at you. I’d tell you if I was and we’d talk about it.”
He nods.
You’re not mad at him. Really. And so, you take pause to wonder why this happy-go-lucky trait of his is particularly irking you today. “It’s mostly a good thing, I promise.”
“It is?”
“Yeah.”
He looks pleased for a minute and then: “Wait. What’s a good thing?”
You want to kiss his stupid mouth until he can’t think. Which you don’t think would take long at all, actually.
“That…” You think about how to phrase it, and it quickly occurs to you. “That. You’re my ‘yes man’.” He is expressionless for a moment, and you wait for comprehension to slowly crawl over him. “I mean, Cecil,” you take his clammy hand in yours. “That it’s always fun with you. I mean that you never shoot down my ideas. Even when you probably should.”
His face splits with a brief - goofy, but wholly endearing - smile. “You have fun with me?”
His big cow eyes go all soft and wet.
Oh boy. This idiot. If you didn’t have fun with him, even just sitting on his grotty couch, what other reason could you possibly have to hang out with him, huh?
You open your mouth to say as much before thinking better of it, but for once Cecil beats you to it.
“I have fun with you too, Hottie.”
It’s another one of those moments of levity that you’ve experienced surprisingly often with Cecil. One of those moments where everything feels a just little more profound. A little more magical. Sometimes, Cecil gets you in the gut just a little harder than expected.
Great. And now you’re thinking of Cecil all up in your guts.
“I should think so - I’m awesome. But, right now? All I’m saying is…” You tap your noggin. “Tank empty. No ideas. It’s your turn to decide what we do tonight? Okay?”
You search his eyes. His big, beautiful, sincere and secretless eyes. You silently ask the true question you want to ask him. I want to know what you want.
You’re not yet ready to admit the questions buried right beneath that one: do you want me back? Could you? Would you, Cecil?
“Yeah?” Cecil responds, unsure, and you immediately worry that you have, in fact, given him too much responsibility. His expression compresses in a frown of deep, deep concentration. Like he’s really wrestling with this.
You watch with bated breath, dying to see what he comes up with - if anything at all.
And then - aha - he finally has it.
“I could jerk off.”
“Wha-?” You playfully bat him in the arm, aghast. “Cecil!!”
“What?” A surprised, contrite laugh bobs in his throat.
“I mean.” You swallow. “How is that an idea for both of us?”
Oh that’s your problem with his idea?
That it’s not participatory enough?
“You could help.”
Your jaw drops open. “Cecil! I’m not gonna-” you switch to a loud whisper “-jerk you off!”
He blinks again, his eyes glinting with a gentle - ever so gentle - flicker of amusement. “You’re not a yes man,” he complains softly, his curly lips sneaking up into a curly smile. “Always shooting down my ideas.”
He bats his lashes at you and oh boy - even Cecil must be starting to figure out that you’re a sucker for those big, pretty brown eyes. Your one true weakness.
“That’s really what you want?” you ask, trying to keep things light. To keep your tone jokey and jovial, like always, despite the rising tremor in your voice. “It would involve getting up, you realise?”
He winks at you - a gesture which seems entirely unlike him and yet somehow works - and smirks down at his crotch. “Already am.”
“If you’re really so uncontrollably horny, why don’t you get someone else around here to help you, huh?” Your heart skips a beat. “Why me?”
He’s looking at you like he wants you but… he’s an opportunistic guy. Goes with the flow. That’s how things come to him; he’ll take his cigarettes and beers and fucks wherever and whenever he can get them.
He unceremoniously pulls out a rolled blunt and lights it up, the filter end pressed between his plush pink lips.
“No.” It bobs as he talks and he takes little, peppered drags to get the burn going.
“No?”
You blink at him dumbly now.
“No. I only want you.”
Correction. That’s the most sure of anything you’ve ever heard him.
He slips forward, exhaling his smoke into your mouth as his lips caress yours. “Come on,” he encourages. “Get going. Before my penis turns into a couch cushion.”
He kisses your laugh, and as his tongue slides hungrily against yours suddenly it isn’t quite so funny. Suddenly, you feel like maybe Cecil has the best ideas.
“Right here?” You reach down, and you smooth your palm over the clothed bulge at his crotch. “In the booth?”
“I’m already barred. Heh. What are they gonna do?”
You smile at him, licking your lips as Cecil bucks up into your hand, his head lolling back against the lip of his seat, and his pretty eyes fluttering closed.
He groans, as your fingers snake to tease open the button at his fly.
“Oops,” Cecil whispers contritely, almost immediately, his cheeks and his ears darkening with a deep crimson flush as he looks over to you. “I just… I…”
Oh God. He just came in his pants, didn’t he? Oh Lord that makes you inexplicably hot.
His big, pretty eyes are wet with apology. “Are you mad?”
“No, Cecil.” Poor baby. “I just think I should take you home and get you cleaned up, hmm?” You next words all run into one, as you struggle to get your new genius plan out of your mouth. “Mayberimyoualittlewhatdoyousay?”
Did you actually just suggest that you take him home to rim him? Good Lord.
He blinks rapidly, the colour in his cheeks flowering more, like a beautiful rose unfurling. “Y-Yes. I say yes.”
It’s a hare-brained plan, for sure, but you decide that for once,
you might as well just…
go with the flow.
It certainly works for Cecil.
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cindersnows · 2 months ago
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typing styles in my headcanon
TSC: The quick brown fox jumps over the dog lmao XD
starts sentences with caps usually due to autocaps, doesn't use ending punctuation very much unless excited or asking a question, but uses lots of emoticons! tends to contract words and uses lots of abbreviations, inconsistently uses apostrophes ("I don't think Im ready"), tends to use ellipses in place of commas "Guys... We had homework"), emphasizes words by talking in all caps, uses tone indicators inconsistently
YELLOW: The quick brown fox jumps over the dog, haha.
"Type like a human /lh." uses proper punctuation and capitalisation, doesn't contract words very much, doesn't use emoticons unless to look ominous ("Watch out, Green :)"), generally has more of a sophisticated vocabulary, grammar police, uses tone indicators consistently, only swears when flustered or frustrated
RED: OMG OMG. the quick brown fox jumps over the dog
"bark like a dog. ur below me moron" generally types in all lowercase except when excited or yelling, ends clauses with a full stop instead of a comma or a connector ("guys. there's a BUG. in the garden!!"), overuses all punctuation tbh, lots of abbreviations especially omg and lmfao, uses kaomojis and "owo" ">w<" instead of classic emoticons, uses u and ur instead of you, your and you're
BLUE: the quikc brown fox jumsps over the doggg XP
queen of typos especially when drunk or sad, overuses emoticons to indicate the tone of the message, uses u and ur instead of you, your and you're, shortens basically everything she says ("n then i was liek girllll ur 2 stressed chill out 4 oncee!!!! r u insane m8"), drags out words and syllables a lot when typing, self proclaimed keysmash connoisseur
GREEN: pfffttt, the quick brown fox jumps over the dog.
frequently uses onomatopeia ("pffft, hahaha, BOOM, lalalalala."), generally always uses punctuation, but capitalisation depends on who he's talking to and how desperate he is to impress them (better grammar = more desperate), drags out words sometimes when calm or upset, doesn't really use emoticons other than :/, fairly sophisticated vocabulary but very informal language ("i am trapped in some sort of fucking kafkaesque nightmare"), says chat
PURPLE: the quick brown fox jumps over the dog
dry ass texter tbh, all lowercase except when emphasizing something ("i Did Not hit her i did not"), doesn't usually contract words, rarely uses punctuation except for the occasional full stop, sometimes uses abbreviations but not often, frequently goes "uhhh" "mmmm" "hmmmm" and uses filler words often, picked up saying "chat" from green, whether he's joking or not is between him and god
MANGO: The quick brown fox jumps over the dog.
proper capitalisation and punctuation, takes 2-3 business days to respond, very ominous messages ("Goodbye Purple, make sure to watch your back." <- "chat wtf is he talking about im shaking hes so ominous"), always contracts when possible, never abbreviates
DARK: the quick 8rown fox jumps over the dog
replaces his "b"s with "8"s as well as any syllables pronounced as eight ("she 8, cmon m8") much to purple tsc and yellow's horror, sometimes uses apostrophes but sometimes doesn't, talks in lowercase usually but yells a lot, lots of abbrevi8ions i mean abbreviations, swears every other message, if he doesn't reply within 2 minutes he's in a fight, sometimes uses emoticons
CHOSEN: It jumps
texts dry as the desert, very short messages, will take an hour to respond and it will not be worth the wait, dark usually elabor8es on their behalf, capitalises and has proper grammar solely due to autocorrect, also frequently the victim of autocorrect ("What the duck I mean duck I mean fuck"), no ending punctuation
VICTIM: The quick brown fox jumps over the dog— ah fuck it i dont fieel like typing liek a normal person rn im drunk off my ass
two modes: "The public's opinion of me is very important." <- types like mango or yellow, and "dudeee idgaf abt any of them i coudl literally launch a nuke rn n kill them all but i dont bc freedom will get upset" <- typing without any effort whatsoever, extremely informal, typos galore, drags out words and uses lots of abbreviations
bonus (too lazy to give explanations, or still figuring them out):
PALEO: The quick brown fox jumps over the dog (just imitates the typing of whoever she's talking to)
HAZARD: i am not doing that (uses aac to type, still getting advice on this one)
BALLISTA: GUYSSS HOLY SHITT!!!!!! THE QUICK BROWN FOX IS JUMPING OVER THE FUCKING DOGGGGG (caps spam)
STRIKER: The rapid mahogany fox leaps over the dog. (showoff smh)
FREEDOM: The quick brown fox jumps over the dog (fairly normal, no ending punctuation)
HANGMAN: the uhhh,,,,,,, the quick brown fox jumps over the dog im pretty sure (extremely uncertain)
TYPHOON: THE QUICK BROWN FOX JUMPS OVER THE DOG :P (all caps, constantly)
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dreamsy990 · 3 months ago
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every time i draw namine i will make her more exhausted and no one can stop me. anyways i appreciate the people who draw kh3 namine designs with cute white and light blue palettes but also NO!!!! SHE WOULD NOT!!!!!!! this is the girl whos whole aesthetic is being trapped in a white room and painting the fucking walls. you just KNOW she is wearing the brightest most mismatched colors at all time. neutral colors? the fuck are those? shes like the daughter of a beige mom that grows up and refuses to have anything that isnt bright again. anyways i think she should be tired and colorful.
also @autocorrection sorry for stealing your pants
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phoenixcatch7 · 4 months ago
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You got me thinking about this all day. I'm on mobile so forgive autocorrect
Padok stared at the kid in front of him. The kid stared intently back.
"You can... just take them. They're free," Padok repeats.
"That's not fair! I don't want to be in your debt! We'll trade."
"Ok. What do you have in mind?"
The kid, who had curly hair and a green tunic over a brown undershirt shrugged and started sorting through his bag. He pulled out many things including a little doll of himself which he immediately put back in, a raft that he swiftly threw over his shoulder before it expanded and knocked a few of his companions to the ground, and a large bottle that was obviously supposed to be a terrarium complete with sticks and a brightly colored beetle, before finally pulling out a stick with a few leaves and flower blossoms on it. The kid smiled proudly and set it on the table, declaring it a "symbol of life and prosperity grown in the blessed gardens of the Great Mothers."
Padok had no fucking idea what that was supposed to mean but he nodded and set the stick on the shelf, getting a bunch of bananas to hand to the kid, who accepted. This usually is a red flag that you're dealing with yiga, but Padok had his doubts.
The curly haired kid thanked him and wandered away. Padok slyly watched him take a banana and chomp off the top, peel and all. Curly made a disgusted face but chewed and swallowed while several jaws dropped in the group he'd come with, along with one chiding "Hy-Rule!"
Scarf attempted to stop Curly, but Blue Hat stepped in with a grin, shake of a coin bag and a gesture where the quad colored tunic kid was watching in fascination. Wolf pelt tried the peel and actually nodded like it was alright. Scarf threw up his hands and turned to their leader, a man with full plate armor - how rich are these people?- who had been teaching the caped boy with a replica of Link's sword how to peel and eat a banana properly. Lobster shirt was watching them and took the banana peel, rubbing the inside consideringly. When Armor turned to address Curly, Lobster shirt carefully dropped the peel on the ground and went to bother his elders.
"But it is edible?" Curly asked loudly, shaking the peel for emphasis.
"I mean yes, but just because it won't give you food poisoning doesn't mean you should eat it!" Armor argued, rubbing his eyes.
Lobster shirt pointed out Lola, Padok's dog, to wolf pet, who ran to greet her and slipped on the dropped peel landing flat on his ass.
"It doesn't matter how it tastes!" Curly was meanwhile arguing. "Everything that can even give nutrients is a gift you shouldn't waste! What if after here we get stranded something we can't scavenge or hunt in? You'll be wishing you had extra peels to eat!"
Armor opened his mouth, visibly sighed, and gave up. Curly took another triumphant bite of the peel and cringed. Blue hat exchanged money with Quad Color. Scarf's face was buried in his hands.
Padok's pretty sure these guys aren't yiga.
I'm cackling oh I love this.
The increasingly doubtful stable master, hyrules canon bag of goodies with the raft and doll, the shout of dismay from the group but twilight testing it with... I can't tell if he used his human or dog taste buds, even my black hole of a goat dog won't eat banana peel XD. I think twilight just. Is like that.
But wind discovering the banana slip on his very first banana.... Tricking twilight with a dog to pet (mood), the way the guy thought time was rich af or at least descended from people who were, with his plate mail, hyrule ACTIVELY defending his terrible taste but hating the banana peel XD. The general air of chaos. Oh I love this!!!
Yeah sure despite the bananas they manage to pass the test anyway. First people to do so, but now he's got a great story to tell the next people coming in lmao.
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brucewaynehater101 · 5 months ago
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Special Death (Elvis) is the death of too many cheeseburgers and not enough poo chute. Fun fact: You can wash squirrels with the tiits of a seagull. Thank you for not voring in corrugation! If painis is sure to result in victory, then you must deploy a sentry point on your arse with cupcakes. (Time for a competition in sexnificence!) My arms are too long.
Introducing…The Skronk Machine! For improved and easier skronking! (person being skronked screams in agony)
I'll buy you a delicatessen! In stainless steel! B. Smith would be a passenger on the westbound train, and the crowd that greeted him when the train pulled in etaoin shrdlu. Cardamom yellow paint is tasty for the soup of God with the super painis of mega yeet.
In conclusion, Kryptonite tastes like green apple Ring Pops and Lazarus Water tastes like blue cotton candy :)
This makes me question my reading comprehension skills, but in a good way? I'm hella confused, but kind of vibing with it.
Special Death (Elvis)... does it actually have anything to do with Elvis? By not enough poo chute, do you mean they ate too much with shitting???
I didn't know seagulls had tits. I don't want to look up "do seagulls have tits" because Google will then start showing weirdly specific ads I want nothing to do with. I thought birds, if they produced milk, did it from their throat. This is probably why I got a C in my ecology classes.
Fuck. I looked up "voring." Godsdamnit. Anyways, voring in corrugation... consuming a loved one while simultaneously being folded up into tiny ridges? It would be harder to do that than to not do that... so you're welcome?
I give up. I looked up painis, and Urban Dictionary told me that means penis (also, autocorrect tried to turn penis into punishment. I have no clue how to feel about that). So.... if penis = victory, then I must build a tower on my ass with cupcakes? Okay.
[I feel like I'm taking notes for a class that's 3 levels ahead]
As far as sexnificence, I tried to do etemology... The end is apparently "to make, to do, or doing." So time to compete in the doing of sex? I'm good, but I do have questions on how that relates to your arms being too long?
For scronking, I am glad that it seems to be a demonstration (i.e. the person screaming while being scronked). Thanks for showing what it does even if I still have no clue what it does ^^
As far as the stainless steel delicatessen, I appreciate you buying me one (as long as it's something chill). I don't know where I'm going to put it (since I also don't know how big it is), but I'll find a place for it.
I don't know a B. Smith nor his destination, but I wish him safe travels (unless he's a prick).
How often do you eat paint to know which colors have better flavor down to their exact category (instead of just yellow, blue, green)? Also, why is God eating paint soup? Is mega yeet a person or title? Why is their painis super and being added to the paint soup???
Overall, I am glad you confirmed what the Lazarus Water and Kryptonite tastes like. I've never wondered what Kryptonite tastes like (which I now realize is a mistake. I should have been wondering this entire time). Lazarus Pits, though, I thought tasted like sweet sweaty death and Bug Juice drink. Blue cotton candy is much tastier.
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notquiterobin · 3 months ago
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Into/explanation/boundaries post:
So into/explanation first: This is a DC rp blog with an oc of mine! If you don’t like things like that, just don’t interact with it, if you do that’s great! Feel free to interact through reblogs, comments, or asks! So going into the actual character:
Alexandra Catherine Todd-Wayne:
- Daughter of Willis and Catherine Todd
- Younger sister/sibling of Jason Todd (6 years younger)
- Adopted by Bruce Wayne at age 5 with Jason
- 16 years old
- Ace, bisexual and Demigirl
- Aspired to be Robin when she was younger, is now a non-Batman-approved vigilante named Corvid (as a lot of corvids are preditors of robins, plus it’s the name I usually use online/lh)
- Generally keeps the non-killing rule as Corvid, but is a bit more harsh then some of the other bats
- Has similar goals to the robins (improving Gotham, keeping down crime, and generally keeping people safe) but after Jason’s death no longer wanted the moniker
- General appearance stuff: | 16 | 5,1 | blue eyes | black hair | human | has a few scars but notably one on the side of her left cheek |
- closest to Jason, but still very close to most other members of the batfamily
- In true bat fashion is usually very closed off about trauma and other emotional issues
- Nicknames: Alex (name they usually go by), Allie (mainly used when they were younger, so mostly used by Jason, Dick, Barbara, or Bruce), Lexie (less used, still open to it)
- lmk if I forgot anything important
Boundaries section:
Dni’s:
- Homophobes
- Transphobes
- Ableist’s (I’m disabled, a lot of that will reflect in any character I write or make)
- Racists
- Zionism
- Terf’s
- BATCEST. (I do not care how you try to rationalize it, I don’t want to see any Dick/Jason, Bruce/any of his children, Alfred/any of his grandkids. Any Dick/Tim, Jason/Tim, or Damian/Tim. Just no batcest okay?
- I’m dyslexic, if you find spelling mistakes please just ignore them unless they completely change the meaning of the scentence, autocorrect can’t catch everything
About me:
So if you got this far, hi! I’m Raven/Corvid (Corvid is mostly an online name but Raven is my name),
I got by primarily They/Them pronouns, I’m an aroace Lesbian
and I am a minor so please keep that in mind (I’m fine with any ages on here just keep it in mind that I’m under 18),
I’m disabled (not gonna put out my whole medical history but shortly put: chronic pain, t1d, autism & adhd, c!ptsd, dyslexia)
I’m a pretty longtime DC lover (on and off since I was 5), mostly Batman and Batman adjacent stuff, hellblazer, green arrow, young justice, and teen titans
Al Ghul lover, seriously I love them sm
Very into music (specifically Hole, Nirvana, Babes in Toyland, Big theif, Fiona apple, Mcr, Bauhaus, Siouxsie and the Bandhees, The cure, Ghost, Green Day, Alex G, and Elliott Smith)
^ also if you think Courtney killed Kurt fuck off, seriously I’m not going to argue with you, either don’t bring it up or just go away
Closing stuff:
Absolutely feel free to interact with this weather in character or not, I’d love any questions or asks it just may sometimes take me a second to get used to them
list of my other blogs: @not-a-robin, @dr-pamela-isley, @cassandra-e-sandsmark @bludhavens-finest @average-exasperated-gothamite @adeline-lynn @eirian
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