#fuck that bitch i want my girls back
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I should probably write that scene I've been daydreaming for like literally a week shouldn't I
#look i havent been able to write for months unless its idtib#but maybe this'll count since it's idtib adjacent?#since its not Idtib im not writing from James' pov though#fuck that bitch i want my girls back#i should probably explain the scene huh#its just like? Remus being very out of it after Jessica dies.#like major depressive episode vibes but idk if it lasts long enough to count as that#but Rainey just takes her home#and they curl up together and Remus explains what she did in the surgery. and Rainey is the sound board#she can tell Remus if she would've done something different#(rules are she wouldn't have)#but the whole time james is very??? and trying to get answers.#but Remus isnt enough of a person to answer her.#instead shes vomitting off the side of her bed because the details are too grusome and hard#maybe also brrs for her taking Alec to the morgue.#100% someone else offered and she told them to go fuck themselves (probaby not but she was very firm that she'd do it)#jamie shut the fuck up#personal blog#just vibing#rambling#writing
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finally started p5 royal ‼️‼️‼️‼️
expect some royal trio art soon they are my dearly beloveds (minus akechi i hope he dies in this reality too)
#love that ren got the sad boy kdrama fit#also no idea how akechi survived i want to shake it out of him so bad why are you gatekeeping stupid bitch#idk if this is just him w/o the pleasant boy facade but he seems so much more exhausted and cruel#like everything he says is verbal irony bc he’s patronizing everyone. he hates being a team player sm it’s insane 💀💀💀#he’s so withdrawn and short tempered and actually mentally unstable. like sadistically so#i think these are all warning signs#if he dies again i’m ending it all. you didn’t come back from the dead just to die on me again#also sumire….i love her so bad…..my sweet girl….my baby ☹️☹️☹️☹️#sumire yoshizawa they could NEVER make me hate you#she reminds me of a fawn 😭😭😭😭 with her big soft doe eyes and how she’s so curious and eager#GAAAAAHHH every time she comes up on screen i want to give her a headpat SO BAD…..SHES SUCH A FUCKING CUTIE#i feel so bad for ren bro he’s literally stuck babysitting the new kid and simultaneously keeping akechi on a leash 😭#poor boy needs a break. we should go to hawaii again that was fun#anyway yeah that's all#hopefully i’ll finish the game this week i’m sick of this. i want to move on
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Nothing to see here just steph stealing glances of klay like he’s afraid he’s going to get caught 😃😃 (via namxsj on twitter )
#nba#golden state warriors#dallas mavericks#steph curry#klay thompson#steph/klay#ok first of all oh my god#secondly i need asg week to be NEOW actually I don’t think im capable of waiting til feb#both teams have kinda been floundering (mavs to a lesser extent but still) and I am growing Impatient for the reunion !!#also the buddy hield cycle being proven right for the 4th(?) time. lmao. some of those dumbasses rlly thought they got prime klay back#the victory lapping after beating the blazers jazz pelicans and pelicans was like nothing I had ever seen#especially towards a fucking legend !! like klay fucking thompson !!!!#no one not even pr-trained to high hell steph curry himself could ever convince me that he’s hopeful or even okay with this bullshit#he needs klay. klay needs him. they need each other and always have but it’s looking more and more likely that steph is#gonna go out like kobe while klay is gonna gonna keep chasing the ghost of pre-injury self#that last part felt so wrong to type out because i personally think he’s been everything you could want and more from a guy#who went thru everything that he went thru and#his comeback is probably my favorite comeback story in any sport ever of all time bc it’s such a fairy tale. and it also actually HAPPENED#!!!!!!!!!!!!#ppl talk abt the injuries like they happened to him and then he just disappeared forever like no bitch !!!!#he came back and they won it all that same year !! led the league in 3pm the year after that !!!!!! led the league in ft% the year#after that n ppl still acting like he adds virtually no value to any team that wants to win a chip when in reality that couldn’t be further#from the truth#I wrote it like that because I get the sense that they both look a little lost/confused at times and I can’t help but think that#losing embarrassingly or not they might at least be in better spirits (if nothing else) if they still had each other’s company#oh well. lol#ok I think that’s everything I had and a million sorrys if this post exploded on ur dash i wish I could turn off my stupid sports rpf brain#but I can’t ❤️#wishing every happiness to the two of them tho they’re my babiest girls frfr#nik's rants
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obsessed with how the literal second charles first dies in the classic comics magneto finally comes back for the first time in like twenty issues
#snap chats#THEY BEEN NAME DROPPING HIM EVERY OTHER ISSUE SINCE HE FIRST FLED LIKE STOP TAUNTING ME#‘SNAP SPOILERS’ GOD sorry. yeah charles dies in like what. issue 42????#oh bitch i was just guessing yeah it is 42 LMAO#anyways no crying cause the literal last page its all ‘ a moment of silence for our fallen professor.. AND IN NEXT ISSUE MAGNETO’S BACK’#crying tho at pietro going to charles’ funeral and wanting his help for wanda :(((((((((( oh my beautiful boy and my lovely lady …..#also take a shot every time magneto curves a bullet. what is wrong with him.#lol shot. anyways.#group meeting to kick mags’ ass starts in five minutes#ok but Double Crying at pietro sneaking back in the castle cause why does it have the energy of like. some cinderella shit#yk what i mean like sneaking back in the house and toads all IM TELLING MAGNETO ��� fucking SNITCH#he doesnt even LIKE YOU stop pissing me off <- i love toad#i live for the drama tho cant lie ….#‘pietro how dare you go to charles’ funeral’ bro just mad he didnt go himself smh. whatever.#but now im forced to imagine pietro sneaking off to meet with charles like once in a blue moon#Can He Help Him And His Sister but now its too late to know …#girl i got so sad when he fled tho … peitro please the fam’ll help you 😭😭😭😭#anyways im about to have dinner with the fam so im gonna have ideas swirling in my brain for the next two hours BYE !!!!!!!!
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(Realizes that the most common transman experiences perfectly align with my life and feelings about myself and fascinations and who I want to be with) Ohhhh Okay i am fucked
#I do really wish i could just snap my fingers and pilot a cisman's body around#Rather than go through the crucible of visibly transitioning. it seems like a waste to do it when the times are so awful.#I honestly still doubt myself so much but#I can only do so many years of Why are you perceiving me as a woman#Before the shit starts getting real#People really just dont take you fucking seriously. Like even at this point where im at now i still dont know if im quote unquote valid#Because maybe its just a feminist issue and the misogyny is rampant#But an emotional sensitive defensive anxious reactive woman is what i am seen as. Somehow.#When I have gone lengths to ensure that even those close to me do not see a hint of my unchained emotional reality. Just really beats it in#I am entirely logical when I describe my experiences to my family. Clinical and detatched and intentional. And they think i am to be coddle#All the fucking time. Exhausting. I don't want that. I want to come to mutual understanding. Not to beg for emotional attention.#Thats the only thing that ever visibly cracks me. Being horribly misunderstood and taken out of context. Logical self defense being denied.#And being full of estrogen just reinforces that shit. Im a frustration crier. If I had testosterone maybe it wouldnt prove people right.#When you bite back as a woman you are just a bitch.#My fear is that I will be an emotional transgender man that wants to be coddled. I am afraid it will be worse to be that.#I really do just want to be able to live and work and be taken seriously when I say what I mean and what my mind is like.#I want a chance at life. I feel like I'm seen as a hapless girl. Damaged and begging to be freed of all responsibility#No bitch I want to move out and actively build a life for myself and RAISE MYSELF! after years of being misunderstood and alone#And also i want to do homosexual war reenactments with another man or something i dont know i just wish it could be me#Maybe ill just donate blood and faint again#Anyway. Joker. Society. I am the joker#Who wanna reply and tell me if im a valid transman or not. I get chest dysphoria when i have proper posture.#I get ass and hip dysphoria.#Low key having a bangin body as a woman though confuses me still bc maybe i just like being hot more than i gaf about transitioning#It reeeeeally helps that my face has an impeccable T zone. Its kind of masc as hell.
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Made a customer feel bad about being a bitch & take a step back and reconsider why she’s being a bitch… I feel like God
#she was bitching bc she bought alcohol but it didn’t come up as the loyalty card price#so she had to pay like £2 extra and that was ruinous#but i couldn’t adjust the price bc its alcohol i’m not allowed#so i told her if she takes her receipt to customer service they’ll give her £2 back#and she gets sooo pissy with me and goes YEAH AND WASTE ALL MY TIME WHEN THEY CANT HELP ME EITHER? GREAT. THANKS FOR THE BEST NYE EVER.#and like girl do you think this is how EYE want to be spending my new years#so i just stared at her for a second and go There’s people dying out there and you’re mad over £2.#lowkey as a reflex bc im always saying that to my sister when she complains#and then the customer gets all awkward and says sorry and fucks off with her alcohol#Like yessss. Think about what you’re doing girl…
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Also just because you get annoyed by something someone is doing doesn't mean they are evil you can leave us alone
#this is about autistic people.#that guy in you class that is always asking questions? he always raises his hand theres nothing wrong with it#it takes time in the class but that's how he makes sure he understands the subject#and meanwhile every other student decides hes an asshole#that girl who doesnt blink and who cant seem to have a linear conversation is not doing anything wrong#you dont like interacting with her but that doesnt say anything about her you can leave her alone you dont have to bitch behind her back#that person cant read social cues? why are you getting mad? can you shut the fuck up?#it is insane how often some of my friends talk about people who are clearly autistic and are mad at them#no its not because theyre autistic theyre just always interupting!#its not because theyre autistic they just make me uncomfortable! PLEASE LISTEN TO YOURSELF#i swear youre all asshole to us#no respect fr#its so annoying to see you run in a circle trying to justify calling someone an ass for doing literally nothing wrong#youre allowed to feel how you want about other people but you always jump to bullying#and whenever i try to make them realize they get so deffensive#just because you grew up with an autistic brother does not make you a fucking expert youre not even close to him!!#ok sorry im gonna go hit my bong im getting too angry lol
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god bless sleeping 12hrs nightly
#stream#i hate it so much#like get up & do what ? CLEAN ? AGAIN ? be a PERSON ? AGAIN ?#i was so annoyed yesterday ppl were pissing me off so much then i called my mother & it was lovely & i told her how i scammed a vacuum from#amazon last semester by reporting it stolen bc dpd refused to deliver it TO ME & sent it to a language centre so then i reported it as a#dispute on my credit card got my money back then picked up the vacuum ALSKALSKLKSLAKSLA she said ‘u are ur fathers child’ & honestly ? real#cheap as FUCK like i GET IT FROM SOMEWHERE#but she’s also HER fathers child so i don’t wanna hear it 🙄#by that it’s ‘u gotta make it really reasonable if u want anything w my money’#i’m literally going to try to scam an electric drill or just use & return to make a fucking big room divider to THE HEIGHT I NEED bc it need#to be literally like 150cm even to go w the height of the tv bc that’s mounted & it came w the place so i can’t move it & also it doesn’t#even work ALSKALSKALKSLKSLA HATE KY LANDLORD !!!!! i mean love em they don’t do anything it’s full shithead hours 24/7 here & i love that#but GIRL ….#DID YALL RLY HVE TO PAINT OVER THE BITCHES HAIR ?#WOULD A BROOM HAVE KILLED YALL ? anyway ALSO IT DOESNT EVEN HAVE A CABLE#& U HAVE TO HAVE A TV LICENSE HERE FOR THE FUCKING TV 😭😭😭😭#like ALSKALKSLAKSLSLKSLAK literally … decoration#that’s ugly as fuck and annoying as shit like why is it THERRREEEEEEEE#i’m having my mother bring an amazon fire stick when i meet in north carolina like next week so i can maybe hopefully use it somehow like#just as a SPEAKER EVEN#that would be GREAT bc i’m not paying for cable i don’t even watch netflix as is#like let me get this podcast on the tele ‼️‼️‼️#determined to get dishes done today#running low on weed BUT that 1 drug dealer w cancer & w/o a bladder im talking to he’s so fucking hot hopefully he actually has a connect#for me to get smack ALSKALKSLKSLKSLKSLKALAK
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*video by a self proclaimed historian archeology with mary on a cross dramatic beat in the background fake crying hand on mouth in instagram reels* here is a funeral epigraphy of this young roman lady who got murdered by her husband! People especially men were such beasts right then and haven't changed much! *shows epigraphy where parents of murdered girl both father and mother denounce their daughter's murder as something abominable and either way Very Much Not Uncaring of the girls fate*
#i also just think its dangerous to like. chalk up an entire population/culture as having components that act like a monolith#and every one is a misogynistic violent man who uses women as a bargaining chip and no one cared about their#wife/sister/mother/daughter ever#and well. i know the long dead thousand year long spanning violent state the roman empire doesnt need my defense lol#i just think. generalizing a demographic is bad. and like. how people are just comfortable doing it because#they have decided that the entity they are talking about is 'bad' and thus can say all the shit they want about them#and like yeah. roman misogyny was really bad and disgusting i studied roman literature for fucks sakw#i know what many men thought of women back then#but again. there were other men who cared about their female relatives. cicero and tullia. fulvia and clodius. pliny and calpurnia.#ovid and fabia.#literally the longest latin epigraphy we have is a man mourning his wife and wishing he died in her place and listing how wonderful she was#and when pointed out the people in the comments (whose venn diagram is a circle with bitches who exploit little girls#getting raped and/or murdered to spam I CHOOSE THE BEAR which again. if some bitch did that with me#they'd probably find her bloated naked body in the tevere two weeks later like holy shit its so disrespectful)#is a circle)#say 'buuh oooh well some guys loved their wives/daughter what matters she still died' and well.#people point that shit out because you are already so quick to jump at condemning a whole people as mindless monsters#who only thought about raping impregnating killing their child wives and thats just. not true#do you truly believe every human back then didnt have feelings and just adhered to societal norms?#do you thinl you from the oh so enlightened future are illuminated from those filthy savages and are immune from societal bias?#i also feel that like. the way most of those people approach this is less empathy on#the women who suffered beforeha d#in that place and more 'how can i make this about me a 25 yo WASP woman' yk
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I have not posted any of my analysis to reddit yet and I think I might just post it and ghost it. I've already spent too much time looking at other people's threads on there to feel any way good about interacting with folks.
I already went in an added the "I know you're going to bring this up let me save you the time" section which is exclusively touching on the frequent topics of:
"well what about the fingerprint nostrum and finger mimics? He is clearly just a crackpot"
And
"it's definitely some weird elaborate sacrifice to Metyr thing"
#if he's drinking hallucinogenic tea in his free time genuinely good for him. whatever man. i just do not think either of those items are-#at all relevant to the quest especially the nostrum because it is a placebo medicine and aint nothing fake about this shit#also i think theres a distinction between becoming fingers vs wanting to replace metyr? idk like as ive said i think he thinks he's-#better than the fingerweavers and rightfully so#like please come to a new conclusion other than “man this guy is on drugs”#also girl... metyr doesnt need sacrifices. like? where is that textually or in set design? metyr wants us to leave her the fuck alone#she's minding her own business EVERY TIME WE SPAWN INTO HER ZONE#like why are people so desperate for everything to have a dark undercurrent? not everything has to be some dark disney ass shit#“actually finding nemo is a hallucination & Marlin is insane & nemo is dead that movie is actually super fucked up & dory is a grim reaper”#like im sorry but this is how this extra shit all feels to me#like it is already fucked up and miserable?#is he 100% a good person? like thats genuinely person to person. theres personal gain from the quest#and hes definitely very good at getting what he wants#manipulate manifest mother#tail fingers on the vision board#devon yaps#and yap I did#like I don't want to be a bitch because yeah we should genuinely celebrate other peoples theories and hcs in these games#but i dont think “lol this guy is just on drugs” is one of those things#because i like spooky theories if theyre backed up.#but to say “its this weirdly horrible thing and youre all wrong” especially in his context is not great to me#Sorry. like may my own arrogance strike me down like the scholar i think i am 😤 farewell#because again its coming down to meeting this narrative without preconceived bias and most of the reddit stuff feels like-#“he is fucked up. won't say why. but i bet you know why i actually think this 🤫🤫🤫” like just you cant wrap your brain around guy mom#i do really want to reiterate this is about reddit shit. like i am so into people who love his character but interpret him more sinister💕😚#truly eating that shit up
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why the fuck did i write about birds this fucking sucks. i just found out birds only sleep for a few minutes at a time, hundreds of times a day. do you know what this is going to do to my structure? the logistics of their road trip? this is already like three days late and i've been fighting for my life to get A Plot Like Any Plot That Makes Sense out and now the birds fucking sleep for 5 minutes at a time.
#i should've just bailed and written another story when i had the chance#i'm not joking i've never fought a fiction piece this hard before. usually because i'm not writing for specific deadlines#and not a piece so big. and not one that's gonna be workshopped. i wanna blow them away but if things keep going the way they are everyone'#gonna tell me the pacing sucks and it feels pointless and the characters feel really confused. I KNOW. I KNOW THAT. FUCKK#i'm the type to do about 15 passes before i let someone see my 'first draft' and i'm just not gonna be able to do that if i want to get it#in time for a workshop. every day i delay is making things harder for my classmates y'know?? but i've been writing like 1k words a day#and it's still not done. GUHH#I DON'T LIKE WRITING THESE CHARACTERS THAT MUCH THEY'RE NOT FUNNY OR ENDEARING AND THAT'S MY LIKE.#MAIN SKILL AND VIBE WITH SHORT STORY DUOS. BUT NOOOO I HAD TO MAKE THEM DIFFERENT CUZ I WAS SICK OF DOING#THE SAME DYNAMIC OVER AND OVER. BITCH THIS IS YOUR FINAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TRIED AND TRUE GETS THE BLUE (RIBBON)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#head in my hands head in my hands head in my hands head in my hands head#going to work on it some more. fuckk#the voices aren't consistent and i'm trying to make it clear that this is toxic bird yuri and not a mother/daughter thing but the maternal#themes are kind of fucking with that but they're important and i don't wanna get rid of them but it feels forced cuz im forcing it#sigh. i'm gonna have to cut the yuri. these two don't work romantically at all. what a waste of time.#i watched the entirety of mnthly girls' nozaki-kun in the past two days while avoiding writing. did you know that? the lengths to which i'l#go? anyway it was fun i appreciate fellow creative agony and i uh never knew how they did screen tones and wasn't expecting that somehow#so i learned something new (hooray). anyway back to. fucking. bird story stuff#i'm so mad i hate these two (<- lying. just pissy) i hate this story (<- mostly exaggerating. throwing a tantrum)#eughhhhhh i just wanna lie on the floor and cryyyyyyyyyy (<- completely deadpan irl. not That upset just kind of sick of shit)#i'm so burnt out and it's only gonna get worse. ughh#why can't someone just come in and write it for meeeeeeeeeeheheuhhh (<- would hate that)
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My friend is like 'Oh I'm so Hunt aligned' like boy you are a victim of The Buried get yourself together. On a separate note I love scaring people in dark caves.
#tma#the buried#the magnus archives#so many bitches fancy themselves to be avatars#and then say 'i love the spiral-vast-eye :)'#like girl you are BASIC#you are going to be EATEN#if im being honest I'm more of a dark enjoyer but i love caves and i do have chronic fatigue#and some days i just want to lie down in some dirt and go to sleep and let my bones finally rest#also i love scaring people in caves have i mentioned that#also back to my previous point#if they came in contact with the spiral theyd be confused (obviously) that it might not be the distortion and idk lose it. like that priest#if they got vasted theyd get fucked up existentially like me when i was 7#if they got eyed theyd finally know what its like to have a schizospec disorder
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Ugh I was excited for today until I found out I'd have to spend it with people that actively make me hate being alive hate the future and drain me off all energy physically mentally spiritually like a vampire I can't stand to be around her she is the definition of stupidity and even then that's generous as fuck this bitch has filled her brain with so much garbage I watch her brain cells die at alarming rates every single time she uses her vocal cords her giggles make me want to jam a sewing needle into my ear repeatedly so I can never have to hear it again its a friendly reminder that my parents decisions this time my dad's constantly makes me want to die
#i cant even shes just so dangerously stupid#she thinks energy drinks with natural caffeine are safe to give people who have been told by doctor doing take caffeine with thia meds#ahe thinks of a child is CHOCKING to lie them face down n rub their back#she has the evangelical woman voice worse then women I've met n that cult ahe giggles constantly and behaves like the stereotype lil german#boy just got a lollipop over.... everyone and everything whe acts likw an 11 year old I just got the first boyfriend and all they could talk#is how perfect their boyfriend is and they're so pretty good for that I pulled a boyfriend is and it's like a God thing that they met how#SOOOOOOOOOO in love while constantly nonstop touching ahe has to be touching him her hand on his thigh her atm linked with his her heaf on#his chest she has to be in her lap they make out all over the place IT'S DISGUSTING AND EMBARRASSING STOP SWAPPING SPIT#she started a i. hwr words 'love diary of their love journey' they hadn't been dateing 2 months her kids are spoiled fake Instagram bitches#with such shitty views on politics SHE'S A TRUMP FAN GIRL SHENLOVES TRUMP MY DAD BROUGHT IN A TRUMPIE#there's so much i cant even say because even admitting it on tumblr is too embarrassing i wanted.to.likw her i liked her the first day but#THE MORE I GET TO KNOW GET THE MORE N MORE N MISS RED FKAGS#she threw away all my siblings clothes school books toys uniforms for sports their in toys i bought them that week make up jewelry#in the disguise of helping clean house#while i was at the hospital the kids call me in tears i call her beg her to wait and nope.ahe didn't i found the bags by the curb i brought#my dad sided with hwr because 'she didn't mean any harm she didn't know sje was throwing them away'#my mom hasn't bsen dead a year he started dating right after ahe died#hes talking about marrying this woman this woman who has never had an honest educated thought once in her life#WHO ASLO SPEMDA MONEY LIKE A DRUNKEN SAILOR AHE CAME FROM A WITCH FAMILY HER LAST TWO HUSBANDA WERE TOUCH SHE HAS NO KNOWLEDGE OF THE COMMON#SHE SPENDS LIKE SHE STILL HAS MONEY WHEN SHE DOSE NOT AND IT'S LIKE YOU DID NOT JUST SPEND OVER 180 DOLLARS N PASTRIES GOD#SHES SO FUCKIN STUPID AND EVERY HOLIDAY SINCE MY MOM DIED WVERY FAMILY GWT TOGETHER BECAUSE WE DON'T TALK OR.DO ANYTHING WITH MOM'S SIDE#OF THE FAMILY ANYMORE SHE'S THERE EVERY WINGLE MOTHER FUCKIN WEEKEND SHES HERE I'M EXHAUSTED SHES PHYSICALLY AND MENTALLY DRAINING TO BE ARO#OUND SHES LIKE IF SOMEONE TOOK A GOLDEN RETRIEVER ON A DIET OF JUST FUCKIN COCAINE LITTLE GERMAN BOY WITH LOLLY AND CRUELLA DEVILLE AND FUSE#THEN TOOK A STRAW AND DRANK ALL THE SMARTS OUT OF THAT BEING#UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGH MY DADS GOIN TO NARRY RHIA BITCH SHES GOIN TO TRY TO BE A MOTHER TO ME AND MY SIBLINGS AND THEY'RE GOIN TO#be so fucked up because her kids are not ok SHE FUCKED THEM OVER BAD SHE HAS FOUR KIDS ALL ADULTS THEY'RE JUST WOW#I HATE MY LIFE I HATE WHAY FUTURE MY FAMILY IS GOIN TO BE THE GOOD THINGS IS I WON'T HAVE TO STAY I CAN GO N MAKE A NEW ONE WITH MY WIFE#FOR ME BUT MY SIBLINGS ARE FUCKED AND ANYTIME I WANT TO VISIT MY FAMILY YANDERE GOLDEN RETRIEVER BITCH WILL BE THERE WORMING HWR WAY IN#SHES CONSTANTLY CALLING N TEXTING MY DAD NONSTOP OF SHE'S NOT NEXT TO HIM AND IF HE CAN'T RESPOND INSTANT SHE FREAKS OUT N BUGS ME
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So I have two posts in mind RN and one goes
"did you know that I have a squish on you!" but then I turn "squish" into "[redacted]" because confessing is so much trouble when vaguely pointing at the crowd of creatures and trying to explain that you've been on a happy high for over an hour maybe just because of said creature
Second one does
"by the way I love my wife that's all that's the post" and it's followed up by a revolting amount of sappy ass tags and pining because my husband is busy (it's been less than 6 hours since he messaged)
Why didn't I just make them? My brain works faster than I can type and I'm on an energy high
#maybe i should just go to bed#I LIED BITCH I DON'T SLEEP#MEAHSHAHAHAHAHAHAHA#I'm so happy he can't see me breaking down in 4k because he barely checks tumblr#i kinda do want him to find me cause he'd find it cute#i love how my brain is like “successfully avoided talking about squish��� but actually it's creeping in the back of my head#whoever said romance is superior has never had a squish or known it was one and i pity the poor sap#i should make these tags into a post#no i shouldn't#MirrorCatCreditcard shut uppp nobody want to deal with your nonsense#THE GIRLS ARE FIGHTING#(the people in my head)#(yes the voices are sentient now fuck off)#(not you *points at literally anyone i like* you can stay)#mirr's rambles
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Omg I haven't bitched about the shitty first date here yet. I only ever bitch in the tags so check em
#aight so. me n this girl been talking for like 3 weeks and i set up a little date so we can meet each other and see how we vibe right??#tho i made sure this whole damn time to NOT call it a date to her cause i KNOW she gna take it the wrong way#so i plan for us to meet at a park and I'm gna take her shopping just to try on and look at women's clothes#cause i know how scary it can be to do that for the first time. especially on ur own#so. anyways. we're walking and talking in the park right?? keep in mind the whole time we've been talking over text this girl ain't ask me a#SINGLE question about myself. like. I'm leading the entire conversation and doing all the planning#which if u ain't know I'm a very face to face girlie myself#while we're chatting (rly it's just me talking and asking shit to TRY and get to know the woman at least a little bit#she FINALLY asks me a question. it was just why did you want to meet up w me. -_-so anyways back to my lil story#at one point where I'm silent for a bit just enjoying the walk and chattin w other park goers (just polite hi how are you's)#she says you know this is the first time I've ever been shopping with anyone#and my flirty ass turns on my voice and says oh I'm happy to be your first time with a lil look iykyk#and girlie blushes and goes silent for like 15 seconds (thats fine no problem im good at what i do) and then says.#you know theres so many memes i could say about that rn#and bitch. when i say i dried up like a fucking desert in that moment. like THAT is how you respond to the pretty dyke flirting with you????#btw girlie did NOT shower or wash her hair at ALL. like i dolled up a LITTLE bit at least jfc the least u could do is clean yourself -_-#anyways ima run out of room here but while we were shopping i make up an excuse to leave and blocked her on everything in the parking lot#like HOW could you be so uncurious while meeting someone who youre SUPER into for the first time. not to mention i HATED how many pet names#she'd use for me just right off the bat. didnt even get the chance to say anything about it then but not like it matters anymore lmao#anyways. heres to more interesting encounters in my future!! 🤞🤞
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came to the realization that i'm probably always gonna be the ugly friend
#or maybe its just that my friend is gorg so i pale in comparison (she is. and i probably do)#might be a good thing in hindsight cause that means dudes will leave me alone for the most part#even though there were also a couple dudes bothering me tonight but not as much as they were bothering my friend#but then again like. drunk dudes at clubs will try to fuck anyone#actually nvm scratch that im more than happy to be the ugly friend if that means creepy dudes will leave me alone#anyway. i was literally about to throw hands more than once like LEAVE MY FRIEND ALONE BITCH#there was a man who asked her multiple times if she wanted shots and she said no every time like HOW MANY TIMES DOES SHE HAVE TO SAY IT#GET IT THROUGH THAT THICK SKULL OF YOURS BUDDY.#also. at some point i had to drag my friend somewhere else bc there was a dude who i think touched my ass a few times.....GROSS.#i still had fun though#there were a couple times where i was dancing and throwing it back and my friend would come up behind me and get SO close WHRBWBEHW#i kept thinking girl.... if you weren't straight and didn't hate being touched i could've done much worse 😌 jkjk#anyway that was my night. it's almost 7 am holy shit goodnight 💋#raquel speaks
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