#fuck me i sound like such a nerd
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Some guy just asked me what my favourite form of the cosine rule was and I wanted to melt into a puddle
#obviously it’s cosC#i wish he loved me#FOR ME THATS ACTUAL SO ATTRACTIVE AND I LOVE VIEWING MATH AS SILLY AND FUN#fuck me i sound like such a nerd#shellington ahh reaction d#aw man
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now that you mention it, yeah kabru is kind of an ibex
trying to pin it down but I don't feel confident on my grasp of kabru's characterization (depsite him being my favourite guy. you know how it is) but like. Kabru is a nicer ibex. Ibex is kabru but he's no longer asking. Ibex is a kabru but he's not afraid to let outright enemies stay on the board if he knows he'll win the overall battle. I think Kabru would make a better candidate of rightousness. I need a two way au and we're gonna send the dunmeshi cast to divine cycle space and we're throwing the kingdom crew in a last ditch dungeon crawl
@arcnoise tagging just in case
#sound of me clacking toys into different playset#trying to figure out how each universes elements would translate into each other#demons and divines#how does laios' monster fascination cross over to divine space#what are dungeons supposed to represent from the divine space setting. the structure that the demon/divine resides in#a necessary pillar that settlements must build themselves on for what the demons provide and promise?#ik i said kingdom crew but trying to imagine what AuDY would be in the dunmeshi universe#a living suit of armor that so happens to be able to go the surface and pretends to be a merc and dungeon guide for hire?#some things are starting to click. like laios being more a computer nerd. trying to break down the systems that make up divine variety#potentially#to contrast marcilles more interest in civil systems and public services that structure themselves around divines#NO fucking idea how senshi fits into this#anyway. uuh#friends at the table#dunmeshi
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i forgot. how exhausting playlist making is. damn. sorry about the tags i have so much to say about playlist making lol
#especially when i want to put EFFORT into it. ugh#i know i have time i know but the perfectionism 🥹#me shaking my playlist like I NEED IT TO FLOW >:((( FLOW!!!!#and i need the flow to match that. ehem energy. i guess#sorry these are really mindless rambles about the playlist lol ik no one understands what im saying..#but music is such an important arifer thing. they are So nerd about their music and their playlist silliness. this playlist particularly#needs to be PERFECT. ough takahara being in charge of the playlist because lucifer said he'd take care of decorations and#venue was a MISTAKE girl i don't want to do this anymore /j i had been thinking i could order it similarly to the actual arifer playlist#that is always a possibility... but lowkey slow dancing aly&aj as the first song would hit so hard. it really would.... but THEN i'd have to#put the letter after that but. thematic relevance where. this is the SECOND SONG it has to be important >:T which was why the original order#was from the gallows > eternal. because. eternal has to be at the very least. the third song. but slow dancingggggg 😭#hmph#oh god poison and wine sounds nice after the letter DAMMIT..... HEAD IN HANDS. why are all of you bangers it's not fair...#and then i can't just use the ACTUAL arifer playlist because motherfucker im not starting off my wedding with fucking ARCADIA 💀#and yes the arifer playlist has to be played in order because the order is relevant. it will always be relevant. that's why im stressing#😭#ari.mp3#it's too easy to hate you and hard to love.
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This is so unimportant but I keep thinking about that post from a few days ago that was basically like "reblog if hamilton wasn't your first musical" and like 1) i keep thinking of musicals I'd listened to before that even came out (I had two knee jerk reaction ones but i'm up to like seven now) and 2) I STILL HAVEN'T LISTENED TO HAMILTON so that number can just keep going infinitely up
and also 3) I feel like there were at least a few pretty big movie musicals before hamilton. am I just that old?
#raevenly nonsense#like for real tho#phantom the movie 200...4ish?#sweeney todd right on its tails#i absolutely grew up on teh cats musical movie (the filmed stage one not the cgi one#I am at least that old lol)#but like. i saw the phantom one and sweeney todd in fucking theaters#they were kind of a big deal?#maybe i'm just a fucking nerd and don't know it#but that post keeps haunting me#is everyone just babies?#did they all just kinda.... forget the other ones?#MAMMA MIA 2008#i can't#this is to say nothing of the Sound of Music and all those other old ass movies I watched with my grandma#(and to say absolutely nothing of the community theater productions I got to see of Fiddler on the Roof and Jekyll and Hyde)
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open fire emblem fates > go to the records hall > open supports > click nyx > click laslow > read > cry > close game. girl who will be okay
#i cant even tag this with my fates tag im not playing the game#sorry i think ive posted about this support conversation more times than literally anything else it just makes me so emo everytime#they infest my mind like worms that i cant bait out#they r so. romance. to me -> girl who is aroace#they make me froth at the mouth#i have so many thoughts on them constantly i just cannot word it in a way that doesnt make me sound like a fucking nerd#which i am but i like to give the appearance that im not. i dont think its working.#but grrarrhgghhherhhsf#ive already written my essay (‘essay’ it was like five paragraphs) on them i wont do it again#i’d probably just say the same damn thing over and over but its like#it gets me everytime it really does
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honestly i was NOT prepared for dickey goose’s commentary on eursulon’s feelings about his body and his glamour and how that influenced his choices in-game to hit me square in the gender today
#FUCKING ALAS#my FEEEEEELLLIIIIINNNGGGSSSS#worlds beyond number#i would never unsubscribe to the fireside i love listening to these nerds too much#but also fuck yall im unsubscribing 😭😭😭#IT GOT ME IN THE GENDER FEELINGS FUCK#USUALLY ITS BRENNAN COMING WITH THAT SHIT I WASNT PREPARED#im never prepared with lou. god. fuck.#you think you’re safe with the teeth and the dimples and the silly names and then WHAM#‘yeah here are eursulons complicated feelings about his body and how it feels like its not his own sometimes’#and im like. FUCK#screaming crying throwing up#mouth sounds
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My obsession with space has gotten so bad I started yapping about what I know to my parents, send help
#ray's ramblings#but honestly it sounds like something danny would post???? lmfaooooo#the ghost boy has infected me mfnfnfn#tbf I used to be a space nerd went to astronomy club some years back 👍#still can't spot more than ursa major in the sky but heyyyyyyy space is coooool#ALSO FUCK LIGHT POLLUTION I WAS AT A PLACE WHERE THERE WERE NO LIGHT SOURCES NEARBY AND OMG THE STARS LOOKED SO COOL???#THEY WERE SO VIVID AS WELL#*sobbing* i need me a telescope
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Perhaps I will play the Silent Hill 2 remake myself instead of just watching my fave youtuber play it..... perhaps......
#adventures in being a massive fucking nerd#I mean I will deffo watch the first few videos but#This could be good for me#Also 17 minutes in and it sounds like they basically kept the soundtrack??? Dope
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see i don't even disagree w you, it's the specific jikook brand of omegaverse that is rly just an excuse to write straight romance undetected. like you can't convince me that if you replace jm and jk from the average jikook fic with a straight couple something would feel different. and please don't feel included in this because you know how to write a great plot and establish characters ok!!! actually i think i read a bakudeku fic once! it was superr popular and short i think? i tried reading some jujutsu kaisen ff and yeah there's some good stuff out there but nothing compares to the emotional attachment i have to bts so 😞 i need to fixate on something else asap❗
you would not believe. how many times i've tried answering this ask before i dissolve into Yapping. sorry. i have a lot of thoughts about the type of fic you're describing i really do. it's bothered me for a long time. my general thoughts are that. bts ao3 fic is a very short walk from wattpad band fic. so a lot of those sorts of people end up over here that dont have that Shame the rest of us nerds do who grew up writing cringey ass book and anime fic when we were teens that pushed us to experiment with writing in complete anonymity and write fucked up and shit stuff and we started Caring abt what we wrote. and also the wattpad band fic environment is so different to the ao3 m/m. but if you know a little grammar and you actually finish the fic the story just gets so unbelievably popular on its own.
that being said there are good fics still in bts jikook. i havent found them yet but i know they're in there. there's gotta be at least one brave soldier left fighting against swathes of people who probably unironically read colleen hoover for fun. there's gotta be. i refuse to live in a world where there isnt
#but if you want bkdk fic recs. anything by surveycorpsjean#fraycheck especially... godddddddddddddddddd#fics that made me wnat to die so that fic would forver be the best thing id ever read#sorry. that sounds mentally ill. anyway#but if u want to yap. please dm me#i love to be a hater and like i said. the state of jikook fics have distressed me for a long time#there has to be a point where smth else gets popular all these shitty people leave and its just us fucking nerds again#then we will experience enlightenment#i havent kept up with a lot of jikook authors but i do like thisneedsmorefilth#their regency au was pretty good#i think there's been a bit of a dead dove resurgence in fic lately but i dont need to read what kpoppies think dead dove is tbh#we have dead dove at home (my emotional support fic outlines that will nver be written)#sorry. for the Opinions
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#ok tag rant time yay#cus i need to process some shit#soooo the big thing is ajdhfnfhdk pretty girl!!! yay!!!!! and first time for that!!!!!!!! we matched on an app last friday#got coffee the next morning then met up again monday night (implied fun things) then in the wednesday morning shit show she came over just#to sit with me and so everything could be ok for a while and i felt the safest I ever have#which is a big deal because last time i had that feeling i was with the guy i like and one of my best friends sleeping on the floor because#little tiny college beds dont fit three people and then they left me on the floor to sleep in one bed together and i cried a lot#then they essentially kicked me out of the polycule and started dating soooo :) yeah#good to replace that with a (absolutely fucking gorgeous) pretty girl holding onto me while the world falls apart#and yeah she's sosososo prettyyyyy she has such nice dark long hair and really pretty eyes and she's literally#6 feet tall (which. ajdhdjfndbsmdjcjfj.) and she's the biggest nerd omg i had a like 2 hour conversation with her and her gf about star trek#its great#we're moving sapphic fast lol which is a lot but im obsessed with her a bit#did i mention shes so pretty? its fr like that one tiktok sound about a hot girl and her little gay boyfriend#oh and she came over again last night and i think im gonna dieeee lol i never realized how much of a physical touch person i am before#i mean i knew i liked it a lot but i just do not want to let go. at all. ever. i miss her#this is what i mean by bisexual so gay for men and women and it happens liek the stereotypes for both#sadly she's already mentioned maybe having to move because of everything and i really don't want that#but i guess we'll try it for as long as we can#overall though yay yay yay!!!!!!!!!!!!
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i have to ask because ive seen the name spelled with and without the accent- is it cléo or cleo?
it’s cléo! and omg okay i actually had a written thing for this back when i was first setting my girl up but it’s lost in the void now…….. so her maternal grandmother grew up in france and was named anya right. huge huge pianist during her time. and it’s bc of her grandmother that cléo’s mom kemi grew up to be a child of the industry herself (MORE ON THAT LATER!) but kemi wanted to honor anya with her own daughter + just really liked the name cleo (which means to ‘make famous’ btw…) so: cléo anya! the accent is just there for decoration tbh i think it just makes it look prettier LMFAOOO
#⠀⠀⠀⠀﹒⎯⎯ answered.#cléo’s name is very purposefully chosen it’s so important to her story and how she holds herself against the narrative#the narrative: me#IF I CAN JUST YAP IN THE TAGS#like i said above cleo (or clio) means to make famous!#which is so important because all the women in her life are Known Stars…. it was only natural for her to follow in their footsteps!#singing comes natural to her (growing up in the church as a choir kid) so she was very comfortable with it#but after moving to sk and getting her roots ripped out and replanted a whole continent away and having music / singing being taken in such#a different context than she was used to….. oh she suffered BAD 😭 my poor girl….#also note that the most notable person with the name cleo would be a certain queen of egypt…#and as someone who used to play chess (not competitively god fuck no AJAHAHDJW) the ranks and titles of the chess pieces and what they can#do have always interested me#and at the risk of sounding like a fucking nerd (🤓☝🏽) having cléo embody the queen piece ……ohhmfjrheuej#cause the queen piece is the most powerful piece on the fucking board !!! (miss me with that king shit idc)#like if your queen is GONE you’re practically defenseless. and so having cléo’s name also have queen-like connotations and then having her#fuckass ex nearly check her ass out of a career#vibrating fast enough to shatter glass DO YALL UNDERSTAND…….#alright let me stop. JSVEJEWVH
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i hate hazbin hotels art style so much
#I'm not sorry#I'm a big nerd when it comes to art shit and that art style makes me wanna shoot myself in the head#and also i hate the fucking show#amd helluva boss#it's just fucking weird#it tries to hard to be an adult show#but it sounds like something a fifth grader who just learned how to cuss would make yk?#I just hate it so much#mikey talks :3#hazbin hotel#helluva boss#rant
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That ace vibe of "I know this person is incredibly attractive, but they're also saying something interesting could you please stop screaming I want to hear what they're saying."
#this is about kpop#like yeah i know hes hot and shirtless#but i wanted to hear the story hes telling about why he got that tattoo shut UP#or like when people put music edits over someone being hot but i remember the context of what they were saying#and that was more interesting than the edit now is#like yeah cool great muscles and pretty skin#this fucking nerd is also trying to give a really detailed breakdown of their thought process and I really want to know how they did that#I'll get back around to them being pretty once I'm done listening to what theyre actually saying#I'm pretty sure I'm gray ace#like i know theyre hot dont get me wrong it'll fluster me eventually#but only once i like them as a person and even then it only hit SOMETIMES#this is specifically about Christian Yu#hes gorgeous yeah but like I'm really a lot more fascinated by his creative process#it sounds similar to mine and thats not something I see often#asexual#ace tag#kpop#sam speaks
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#ok. this is the fucking bullshit thing abt grad school. u go to fucking grad school bc u r a fucking tryhard nerd freak#who is either naturally very smart or ur so fucking anxious u r incapable of allowing urself to get a bad grad#and then u go to fucking grad school and everyone's like: man fuck ur classes. if youre getting streight As then u aren't focusing on ur#research. and theyre right. but u still cant fucking let go of the idea that if u get a bad grad the world is gonna fucking end and u r a#bad person. u didnt try hard enough. all this to say i have a final project that i put way too much energy into and not even in a good way#i would just open the document. start sobbing. and then close it and spiral abt how i didn't want to work on it. so its bullshit#i mean. its a good project idea ans i probably sound like i kno wtf im talking abt bc i do. i worked on that topic for 4 years but like#i could make it wayyyyy better. its bullshit. i didnt even number the citations to give more page space. i made section headers. i didnt#wrap text. i could add like 4 more lines of text if i wanted but i think im not gotta bc fuck it. ugh. i dont even. i fucking avoide#stochastic stuff altogether which i kno im gonna have to fight abt but like fuck it who cares abt randomness. i just wanna focus on the#predictably aspect of community composition. fuck u. i shouldnt have picked this topic. i mean. i had to bc its like the one microbe thing#i could do but its also like the exact topic that makes me wanna rip my hair out and start screaming. like jesus christ who tf cares? ugh.#i think id give myself a B if it was an undergrad class. but the standard is higher in an all grad class. ugh. i hate this. i should just#send it abd be done. i dont even kno when its due tomorrow. before class i guess. idk i felt like garbage today. fucking vertigo bby. i feel#ok now tho. so maybe the allergic reacting is over???? fingers r still arthritisy tho. jesus. im falling apart#ive got a pretty good sounding excuse for being lazy tho: owo i had an allergic reaction to my antidepressants 🥳 but nah no excuses we run#this body into the ground. like the good old days.#unrelated
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Being a music-based synesthete with absolute pitch is wonderful but so frustrating because the vast majority of people have no context for the way I experience music and thus whenever I try to explain it it makes no sense to them. What do you mean you can't tell what color this song is. What do you mean you don't hear a Bb minor chord and feel your body react to it before your brain does. What do you mean you can't feel the warm sunbeams of D major dancing across your face. My world is filled with musical color but even if people think it's cool they will never really see it and it makes me sad
#mel's musings#to say NOTHING of all the melodic and harmonic figures that make me go fucking feral that laypeople have no frame of reference for#all i want is to go into excruciating detail about my favorite chords and progressions and dissonances and how they make me feel#but i have almost no way of doing that without sounding like an absolute lunatic. tragic :'(#it's honestly one of my biggest reservations when it comes to posting more of my musical analysis here#i want to talk about how harmonic language among other things is used to express emotion in video game music#but i genuinely don't know how to do that without speedrunning everyone through semester 1 of my college music theory class#i need to cover my bases in that sense for non-musicians reading. but it'd also be boring for people who've already been through that#plus that excessive explanation would distract from the points i REALLY wanna make#how do i explain modal mixture or secondary dominance to people who don't know functional harmony. truly#and how do i balance the basic stuff with Actual Analysis for my fellow music freaks. because i KNOW y'all are out there too#maybe one day i'll just say fuck it we ball and throw something out there despite my fear of being too technical#but who knows honestly. the adhd is still adhd-ing and the Fog is still Fogging. unfortunately#but anyway uhhh. if you made it this far thanks i guess and if you have feedback i'd love to hear it#music nerd shit
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gary goldstein is like the nerd emoji if the nerd emoji had its fingers crossed behind its back as it spoke to you and like spent its free time sat in a redroom counting counterfeit money
#starkid productions#starkid#starkid black friday#gary goldstein#I NEED HIM SO FUCKING BAD#jon matteson best role?? yeah duh#he SOUNDS like the nerd emoji#he LOOKS like the nerd emoji#but he is BETTER THAN the nerd emoji#save me gary goldstein save me
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