#fuck dude. four years for this?

[3nderstar]

.

[hijinxinprogress]

I need the jl to discover that Captain Marvel is a menace

Billy gets arrested as Captain Marvel and he’s just a smug menace the whole time despite being on comms with the league “Of course, I understand the seriousness of this situation! I will absolutely comply, I completely understand that you need the code…the code is 1-3-1-2. Also, I want my lawyer 😇” which gets leaked to the press both audio and visual which leads to the jl claiming that CM had been impersonated and their only evidence is the stupid ass grin on his face

The jl was investigating the misuse of a magical artifact and discovered that a group of police officers had joined a cult. Before they had the chance to gather the evidence proving those officers guilty but they’d already sealed away the artifact so Marvel suggested getting himself arrested to incriminate them and he was a little too happy about it

Let’s be honest, Billy only gets caught by the police bc he can commit to a bit and he’s pretending to be an ancient magic immortal so why would he run from a regular civilian human?? But on the inside Billy is dry heaving and sobbing bc he knows that the police could never catch him on his worst day even if he was personally broadcasting his location

Speaking of broadcasting isn’t Billy a fucking radio host?? I know he’s a fucking asshole during commercial breaks “This next commercial reminds me of a recent encounter with officer smith who got lost three blocks from his station” and it cuts to a fucking toilet paper commercial (people swear they heard him mutter ‘bc you’re absolute shit at your job’)

Sometimes people will call in to debate his views on the police and he’ll have a three hour philosophical debate but actual cops will call in to argue with him and Billy’s making your mom jokes and playing air horn noises or 2016 vines like a fucking child 

Billy probably gets caught when he graduates high school bc his yearbook quote is like marvels most well known quote “Captain Marvel coast city precinct, interrogation room 5 (Oct 14 XXXX) 3:37-4:31” billy added too much information and it gets flagged by the watchtowers security system so the jl has a meeting about the breach in security and Marvel’s like ‘yeaaahh, that was me mb’ and batman is making disapproving noises bc ‘this is serious, Marvel! high school graduate, William-’ he can’t finish bc Marvel’s gagging dramatically ‘Billy. It’s Billy ohmygod’

batman, on the verge of a breakdown: who is this kid?? Why does he know the time, date, and location of an undercover league operation??

Marvel, avoiding eye contact with Cyborg who helped picked out his outfit for the yearbook photo currently being projected: ahaha about that…

Cyborg, who distinctly remembers telling Billy not to do anything fucking stupid: 😐

(Vic has framed the picture of the ‘oh shit’ look on Billy’s face when superman lunges across the table damn near in hysterics)

[somnas-writes]

AU where during the year without Hua Cheng, Xie lian made a bunch of friends— aka people started showing up to his house to hang out.

In actuality, they all want to take care of him because they’re worried he will be sad waiting for however long it takes HC to reform. But Xie lian thinks people want to be his friend.

[ms-newvegas]

There are many women who have no idea how much strangers on Reddit have saved their relationship by stopping their boyfriend from doing the stupidest shit imaginable

[fidgetspringer-art]

✧ The Ardal stars ✧

[feline-evil]

Dick or no dick confirmation Pickles was always going to be trans to me anyways; if he's swingin' somethin that's phallo babes, if he's not then his t-dick fat. What's not to get.

[silverlistenstothings]

I was pleasantly surprised by Hermie being on the wanted poster with the rest of the teens, but the more I think about it, the funnier it is. Sure, Hermie isn’t really a threat and is just kind of trailing along, but that kid would not shut up for two fucking months with the riddles and shit and Willy wants them dead.

[boldlygoorgohome]

oof. The gorgug plot line is hitting me so close to home bro…

[fruitless-vain]

I feel like it is potentially not the wildest idea that perhaps if you Hate Christmas and are going to be a Rude Ass Cunt for the entire evening it may be a good idea to not demand that the holiday happens at your house? Demanding that *you host* claiming that you *love hosting* and then, actually, getting mad at everyone for every little thing and overall just having an obnoxious attitude complaining left right and centre over any thing you can think of

You can just choose to not be a part of the holiday. You can be a grown ass adult and say “I don’t want to receive or give gifts this year” or “I’m not liking hosting so let’s do it elsewhere” or any number of potential communication tactics that aren’t Snapping At Everyone For Any Given Reason

You can just, yknow, not participate instead of actively ruining the evening for everyone you’re supposed to care about?

[xxplastic-cubexx]

its fucking pocky day and im not going to have any time to DRAW ANYTHING FOR IT

[47-protons]

I need to hit him with a rock why is he trying to buy greenland AGAIN it's not for sale you can't just buy another fucking country why is he so fucking STUPIDD

[teenageukulelescreamo]

I feel like I’ve regained access to an OC of mine I expected to be shelved away for a long time, but she has suddenly found herself back with the original story she was going to have and it’s actually… so cool???

[helpimstuckposting]

You ever read a line you wrote and you’re like fuck, did I do that? I said that? Damn okay, alright, maybe I’m pretty good at this

[strigops]

he only made it to his third birthday and for that reason im always surprised i feel like this bc he was here for such a short time and its been 4 years (jesus dude) and it feels bad to say it in comparison to every other animal ive had but man. meep being gone does still hurt more than a lot of my other pets.

[okcoolthanks]

We just did a math game and the teacher asked if I liked math b/c I was rlly good at it

My guy I’m autistic

that’s why I’m in this class

[thechaotichorselord]

what a great time to be omni and androgynous