#fuck alastor

[fiendishfables]

Lucifer, grinning: Before you were what?

Alastor: Before I was-

Lucifer: What?

Alastor: Before I was inter-

Lucifer: Before you were interrupted?

Alastor: Cut me off one more time and I swear I'll-

Lucifer: What?

Alastor: *frustrated static sounds*

Y/N, nervously: Stop that. Before he hurts you.

[hazbinhotelhate]

Hazbin Hotel is satanic propaganda, so bad that it is an insult towards satanists.

[walking-samsung-tv-man]

⚡Incorrect Quotes

Vox, pointing to the wall: What color is this?

Valentino: Gray.

Velvette: Grey.

Vox, turning to Y/N: Now tell them what color you think it is.

Y/N: Dark white.

💙🩷💜🤍

Y/N: You deserve a reward for putting up with me.

Vox: You are my reward.

*meanwhile*

Valentino: You deserve a reward for putting up with me.

Velvette: True, you can be really difficult at times.

🤍💙🩷💜

Valentino: I sleep with a gun under my pillow.

Velvette: I sleep with a knife.

Y/N: Both of you are pathetic.

Valentino: Oh yeah? What do you sleep with?

Y/N: Vox.

🩷💜🤍

Velvette, singing to the tune of 'I Kissed A Girl': I killed a guy and I liked it-!

Y/N, whispering: Should we call the exorcist?

Vox, also singing: The taste of his cherry ChapStick.

Valentino, appalled: Call the exorcist.

💜🤍💙🩷

Vox: I just want someone to take me out.

Y/N: On a date?

Valentino: With a sniper gun?

Velvette: Both if your not a coward.

💙🤍🩷💜

Valentino: I will put 'A' down to make 'A'.

Y/N: I will add onto your 'A' to make 'AT'.

Vox: I will add onto your 'AT' to make 'RAT'.

Velvette: I will add onto your 'RAT' to make 'BIOSTRATAGRAPHIC'.

Vox: *Flips Table.*

🩷🤍💙💜

Valentino: I truly believe water can solve all your problems.

Y/N: Weight Lost? Drink water.

Vox: Clear skin? Drink water.

Velvette: Want to get rid of someone? Drown them.

🩷🤍💙💜

Y/N: Could you guys Atleast try to see this from my perspective?

Valentino: *Crouches Down*

Vox: *Kneels Down*

Velvette: *Sits On The Floor*

Y/N: I hate all of you.

🤍🩷💙💜

Velvette: Christmas is cancelled.

Y/N: You can't cancel a holiday.

Velvette: Keep it up, Y/N, and you'll lose New Year's too.

Y/N: What does that mean?

Velvette: Vox, take New Year's away from Y/N

💜🤍

*Y/N drunkenly wanders around the tower and Valentino is drunkenly giggling.*

Velvette, completely sober: *Sighs* Well, looks like it's just me and you against the world, Vox.

Vox, going to their room: Nope, just you. *Shuts door.*

💜💙

[blackboxwarriorsbiggestfan]

Honestly, you ever start shipping something (Radiobelle) JUST to piss off the haters (Toxic Radioapple stans) and then it becomes a genuine ship of yours-?

Like... I'm not putting it in my rewrite, and I still dislike Alastor, but I'll defo indulge in a fic or two when I'm bored

[decentsoupperson]

I have an addiction to Alastor being the villain I swear lol

Shadow Figure Au

Maybe Adam is making progress with becoming whole again and Lucifer is just so proud and excited. So they reach out for each other to touch hands.

Only Adam is suddenly yanked away by Alastors shadow, making him more shadowy and pulled away from Lucifer.

Lucifer: Adam! You fucker!

Adam: Get off of me! *A hand goes to his mouth to keep him quiet*

Alastors shadow holds up a finger to it's own mouth shushing him.

Alastor: You didn't really think I'd make it that easy for you, did you my dear?

I love making him evil so much.

Poor Adam, his progress would be almost reset, but he wouldn't give up.

[things-arent-what-they-seem66]

Guardian Angel AU.

So… I was rewatching episode 2 and at the Angel scene… This came to my mind:

Alastor constantly texts/sends voicemails to Adam whenever he ‘accidentally’ hits him on his visits.

So Adam lies in his bed and listens these.

Alastor: Addie, I didn’t mean it, you know that, right? You’re my family!

Alastor: YOU LITTLE PIECE OF SHIT! YOU BELIEVE HE CAN SAVE YOU?! THEN I-

Alastor: I know, I know, I shouldn’t have yelled… But I get so upset…

Alastor: DON’T YOU DARE INVITE-

Alastor: Job is stressful these days…

Alastor: You don’t think you can change, do you, Adam? You aren’t delusional enough to think, that he will ever feel anything else than pity for a pathetic, miserable, addicted slut like you, right?

Alastor: See you in three months, Addie. I can’t wait

This deletes some of Adam’s progress. And Lucifer hates it, bad enough Adam is forced to see him once every three months, but prick doesn’t even lets him stay alone when he’s not there.

Alastor When I get my hands on you!!!

But yeah, I didn't think he'd just leave Adam completely alone for those three months. Texting him and calling him, maybe even facetiming him.

FaceTime, because even though he visits every three months, those are planned and Adam can prepare to see him. These are random and bring Adam more stress.

He tells Adam it's to check in and make sure the place he gave him is in top shape. You're not being ungrateful by trashing the place I gave you for free?

Sometimes Adam doesn't answer the FaceTime right away, he hurries to clean up a bit. In that time Alastor is leaving voicemails and texts.

Alastor: ANSWER YOUR PHONE YOU FUCKING UNGRATEFUL PILL ADDICTED SLUT!!

Alastor: Come on Addie, I just want to talk to my favorite cousin!

One day Lucifer sees just how fucking bad these things effect Adam and yes they always send his progress back even just a little.

When Adam is sleeping, he listens to the voicemails and reads the texts and it makes him SO MAD.

[vox-official]

He's always in my way istg 😖😖

[sugart1tss]

Vox aesthetic 💙

I Love my flat faced prince

[cattusferoxx]

I am obsessed with the mugs on this show haha

I'm rewatching Hazbin Hotel and I LOVE noticing small details like these

[hazbinsponsoredbyvee]

BTW, this is my new favorite cup for whiskey.

[fiendishfables]

“Never let a man treat you like anything less than Beyoncé.” - Vox

Did I mention that I love them? ❤️

[and-everybody-clapped]

[walking-samsung-tv-man]

📺⚡"I have 4 words for ya...Ask. Blog. Is. Open."⚡📺

Samsung Galaxy Walking TV man is correct. Ask anything! Can be here or in Blog Info. :3

[decentsoupperson]

Blind Au

Alastor takes every opportunity to take advantage of Adam

Especially if Lucifer or Charlie aren't around.

FUCK YOU ALASTOR!

Anyway.

Poor Adam, he's fully blind and getting taken advantage of by this asshole. I bet Alastor leads him to the stairs without telling him and watches him fall. He probably cooks Adam something disgusting and feeds it to him.

[kittscott]

if alastor saw my cd collection then hed die in a secound flat

and i wouldnt mind it

[nouverx]

"I want to eat you" is their love language and you can't change my mind