#fruit house

[thebeefant]

Hey c'mon in, let me show you around 🐛 Sign up by 1/31 11:59p E to get invited to the Strawbhaus⁠

[lovemoroporo]

we couldve had a t4t couple we couldve had a t4t couple we cou

[lilymarch]

you have no idea the sacrifices made to put you on the throne.

[violent138]

Bruce, slumped in a chair: "Alfred it's so insane, he just doesn't stop. Yesterday he broke his ankle and he's back in those goddamn pixie boots with 'extra supports' like that fucking does anything-"

Alfred, stirring sedatives into the tea he's making Bruce: "Oh my."

Bruce: "-I just don't know what to do. He needs to take a break, holy shit that much anger can't be good for a child, and don't even get me started on the coping mechanisms Alfred, they're unhinged-"

Alfred, looking up with a tight smile: "You don't say. Sugar, Master Bruce?"

Bruce, dragging a hand down his face: "-and let me tell you, I don't know where he gets his energy because he hasn't slept in two days! Two days! I was impressed when he first got here, but now I'm just concerned-"

Alfred, handing the tea to Bruce: "Understandable, sir. Anyone in your position would be."

Bruce, nearly choking on the tea: "Alfred, Alfred, I'm so dumb--the lack of sleep must be getting to me-- just spike his orange juice with sleep meds. Child doses of Nyquil or something. Yeah, that'll do it."

Alfred, watching Bruce drain the cup: "I couldn't agree with you more."

[lotus-pear]

i think you guys are onto smth..

i unironically got invested in this HELP

[zegalba]

Sanrio Strawberry House | Tokyo, Japan

[life-spire]

[canisalbus]

Machete and Vasco are so pomegranate-and-the-hand-that-slices coded. To me.

Pomegranates are seen as messy, bloody, inconvenient fruits. You slice or tear or bite and in return for your effort you come away underwhelmed, disgusted, and stained too deep to wash. The consumption of a pomegranate is a violent act of defilement, for both the fruit and the eater.

But that is because most do not understand how to open a pomegranate. They have little patience for the precise carving. They see no point in coreing the fruit gently, no reason to be reverent as they pull the quarters apart. When done correctly, opening a pomegranate leaves little mess. Your fingers will still stain, your knife will still slick, but there will be no pool of crimson drowning both you and the fruit.

The seeds are only sweet to those who understand the merit of a light hand and intricate slicing. Why put in so much effort for a food so bitter and clearly armored against consumption? Surely it must not yearn to be eaten.

(^insane about silly catholic dogs)

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[simpfornegan]

the jacemond prince regent parallels are going crazy btw

[maskednerd]

[ecoharbor]

📍Müllerstiege Apartment, Hallstatt, Austria 🇦🇹

[why-is-it-always-autumn]

We've all heard of "Barry Bluejeans was the roadrunner to Kravitz's Wile E Coyote for like ten years post-Stolen Century pre-Gerblins" (impeccable concept, always hilarious) but consider:

Kravitz has attempted to reap Merle-Fuckin-Highchurch at least 4d6 times since he first appeared on this plane. Through a series of miscommunications, lucky rolls, slapstick shenanigans, and the occasional bout of divine intervention, he has never once succeeded.

Merle is totally oblivious to both his alleged crimes and Kravitz's increasingly desperate attempts to charge him for them.

[mochiwei]

Sketch requests from Insta!

[kcrra]

[eye twitching] yeah it's fine that i've spent the last year and a half trying to convince people that house of the dragon should not be reduced down to "teams" or medieval euphoria because in reality it's supposed to be a complex, borderline shakespearean, poetic tragedy about the downfall of dragons and their royal line, highlighting how war corrupts and destroys even the strongest of us; representing a critique on monarchy, patriarchy, familial violence and trauma. [eye twitches extra hard] and then hbo just went ahead and released "team green" & "team black" trailers. yeah no it's totally fine im calm about it [eye continues twitching]

[hoofpeet]

the group's fav fruits?

[cutevintagetoys]

💖 Get it here: Knit Strawberry Slides

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