#from what appears to be an incredibly obscure band

[navree]

people talk about pumped up kicks as the premiere "school shooting song that is really catchy" but they're fools because i don't like mondays by the boomtown rats is right there and has been for nearly fifty years.

[submariini]

When Finland’s Käärijä took the stage at this year’s Eurovision, a star was instantly, explosively born. With an outrageous energy, infectious presence and that oh-so-catchy hook, the Vantaa-based rapper may not have won the contest but he certainly snatched the hearts of those in his home country and beyond. We ask Käärijä the million dollar question: what next?

[full article under the cut]

Last May, a peculiar frenzy engulfed Finland. Virtually all green foods – cucumbers, especially – were sold out from stores. Buildings across the land were bathed in vivid green lights. Social media brimmed with green-themed parties, while data obtained by Swedish fintech company Klarna showed a 570 per cent increase in the online sales of neon green shirts.

This phenomenon was all thanks to Käärijä, the rapper who represented Finland in the 2023 Eurovision Song Contest. His now-infamous, blazing green puff sleeve bolero – dreamt up by Finnish broadcasting company Yle’s costume design team and which he dons when performing the smash hit track ‘Cha Cha Cha’ – had taken on a life of its own, the lush hue uniting the entire nation amid the competition. “It was incredible to see it happen and so cool being part of it,” Käärijä says. “It wasn’t planned at all – it was the people who created the commotion. I’ll definitely never forget it.”

When we speak over Zoom, Käärijä, whose real name is Jere Pöyhönen, is lounging in his minimal apartment in Vantaa, a city just outside Helsinki. He appears on my screen shirtless, a chunky gold chain dangling on his neck. On his head sits a pastel turquoise cap adorned with little cat ears. As he gestures with his hands, I spot flashes of poison green nail varnish. Pöyhönen’s chosen attire, or lack thereof, is extremely fitting – he typically performs bare-chested (“It gets so hot during my gigs”) and his Instagram handle is @paidatonriehuja, or ‘shirtless rascal’.

Hot off a performance in western Finland, the 29-year-old is enjoying his first days off in a while. It’s been a sweltering summer of non-stop touring, with fans flocking to festivals and concerts nationwide to see his explosive live show. Things are not winding down either, with Käärijä heading off on his first-ever European tour this month. Some of these shows sold out in mere minutes, an indication of his immense international following. “It’s so exciting; I’m definitely jumping into a new territory with that tour,” Pöyhönen says. “But I don’t have any expectations – I’m just going to let everything happen organically rather than stressing about it.”

Although he created one of this year’s buzziest songs, the guy on my screen is humble and, save for his look, almost un assuming. I remark on the stark contrast to his fiery and flamboyant stage presence. “Through Käärijä, I get to channel all the craziness, quirkiness and hyperactivity I’ve had since I was a child,” Pöyhönen says, describing himself offstage as “just this ordinary dude”. Without delving into further details, he tells me that the name Käärijä (translating roughly to moneymaker) stems from a history with gambling. Despite the darkness of its origin, he notes that the moniker is to be taken with a grain of salt.

While it might seem like Käärijä exploded into the public consciousness from obscurity, Pöyhönen has a long journey in music behind him. Born in Helsinki but having spent most of his youth in Vantaa, he started dabbling in the medium at just three years old. Coming from a musical family (“My dad and big brother both play the guitar”), jamming sessions were commonplace in the Pöyhönen household, his instrument of choice being the drums. “I was playing with pots and spoons before I got a set of those plastic kids’ drums,” he says. “When we moved to a bigger house, we built a band room downstairs where me and my brother spent a lot of time practising.”

At that time, rap music hadn’t yet entered Pöyhönen’s life; he was strictly a self-described “metal guy”. His older brother had instilled in him a love for the genre, particularly metal icons Rammstein. Upon starting high school, his musical taste broadened and he began listening to Eminem and popular Finnish rap groups Fintelligens and JVG. “Me and my friends were filming our own music videos to old rap songs, learning the words by heart,” Pöyhönen says. “It [making rap music] pretty much started as this humour thing I did with my mates.”

Encouraged by his loved ones, Pöyhönen began writing his own songs, still playing it for laughs. Turned out he had a knack for it. “Since I was little, I’ve been an avid storyteller – my imagination ran a little wilder than the rest of the kids’ at my school,” he says. “So when I started making music, I didn’t even need inspiration; I was able to whip up the lyrics from my head.”

But then, at 15, an unexpected turning point came by way of a severe sudden illness. Rushed to the hospital with ulcerative colitis, a chronic inflammatory bowel disease, Pöyhönen underwent emergency surgery to remove his colon. Had he not been treated immediately, the complications could have been fatal. “I was writing songs in the hospital – music became a source of strength for me,” he says. “I decided that if I make it through this, I’m going to give my all to music and be serious about it.”

After over a decade of hard work and countless hours in the studio, Käärijä released his first album, Fantastista (Fantastic), in 2020, but it would take three years for him to become a household name in Finland. After snapping up the top prize in Uuden Musiikin Kilpailu (the Finnish contest for new music) with his party anthem ‘Cha Cha Cha’, a song dedicated to a hedonistic night out fusing rap, electronic music and metal, he secured the coveted spot as his country’s entrant for the 2023 Eurovision, held in Liverpool. One of Pöyhönen’s craziest dreams had come true.

For Pöyhönen, Eurovision was “an amazing but immensely tough experience”. The event’s intense schedule and the little time carved out for practising surprised the artist. There was no room for errors or retakes once it was time for rehearsals. “They didn’t give much mercy,” he says. On the bright side, the long days filled with “lots of press conferences and waiting around” gave Pöyhönen a chance to get to know the other artists. “The group we had there was wonderful – there wasn’t a competitive atmosphere at all,” he says. One of the contestants he became especially close with was Sweden’s Loreen, with whom he exchanged numbers and promised to “meet up and talk about everything else but music”.

By the time the grand finale came, Käärijä’s explosive performance and infectious song had made him one of the favourites to win. Ultimately he came second, while Loreen nabbed first place. How did Pöyhönen handle the letdown? “It was a huge disappointment, but in the end, the feeling didn’t last long,” he says. “When I thought about how far I’d gotten, the incredible journey it was and all the new friends I made, I realised that these things are far more meaningful than winning.” Plus, he still achieved something major: ‘Cha Cha Cha’ made history as the first ever Finnish song to reach Spotify’s global most-listened charts. The track’s reach proved to Pöyhönen that language doesn’t matter; it’s all about creating a singular, infectious sound: “The mouth is just as much of an instrument as the piano or the guitar is,” he says.

Having made history, I ask Pöyhönen if he felt any pressure after the Eurovision bubble had burst. “Of course there are the thoughts of ‘what now?’ and ‘is this going to be it, will anyone be interested anymore next year?’ – I’m aware that the hype won’t last forever,” he says. “But I’m onto creating the next thing, trying not to feel any pressure for future releases. I haven’t done that before, so why would I do that now?”

Pöyhönen hints at a new album dropping sometime next year, but in the meantime, he’s enjoying the attention – including his Vogue Scandinavia debut. Shot at the extraordinary home of the late interior architect Antti Nurmesniemi and his wife, textile artist Vuokko Nurmesniemi, we find the space where Pöyhönen and Käärijä meet, the quiet confidence mingling with that more-is-more persona.

And while Käärijä might develop as a character (“I want to show that he’s more than just a bolero chap”), he’s adamant that he will stay true to his music and keep singing in Finnish, despite the sudden international attention. “In the end, I’m doing this for myself,” he says. “Also, why change something that works?”

Photographer: Karoliina Bärlund Stylist: Sanna Silander Talent: Käärijä Hair Stylist and Makeup Artist: Neea Kuurne Photographer Assistant: Milja Laakso Stylist Assistant: Nelli Korhonen

[mykuup]

𝕿𝖆𝖓𝖌𝖑𝖊𝖉 𝖎𝖓 𝕲𝖔𝖉'𝖘 𝖉𝖊𝖘𝖎𝖗𝖊𝖘

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My Masterlist

Summary : Four dark figures chose you for their full-moon ritual.

wc : 2.5k

Warnings : SMUT // porn without plot // dub con // cnc // bondage // mention and use of tentacle // creampie // kinda monster fucking // kinda religion kink-play? // unprotected piv (wrap it irl guys) // size diference // voyeurism // no mention of y/n // afab reader but no skin color or body description (Reader only have pussy and boobs)

A/n : This is my little gift for Halloween. I know it's not scary or anything but I wanted to share something for this special day!

I discovered this band a few months ago and I'm OBSSESSED to say the least. The lore is incredible and their songs are just amazing!!

Thank you @saphirmoraitie for the beta reading 💜

(The end of 'Of bone and bloom' will get posted soon btw 🤭)

You're out of breath. For the last few minutes, you've been running, plunging deeper into the woods, reaching its darkest depths. You can’t even remember how it began—all you know is that you’re being chased. From a distance behind you, you hear the crunching of leaves under multiple pairs of feet. The full moon hangs above, and the air is chilly, a thin fog blurring your vision and obscuring what lies ahead. Trying to catch a glimpse of what's pursuing you, you stumble over a large tree root. You trip and hit your head hard as you fall to the ground. The impact leaves you dizzy, pain pounding in your skull. As you struggle to rise, the footsteps stop just in front of you. The fog seems to thicken, and all you can make out are four dark silhouettes. "Pl-please," you murmur before everything goes black.

A strong scent of candle wax and burned flowers fills your nose, stirring you from unconsciousness. Your head still throbs, and as you reach up to soothe the pain, your eyes fly open.

You can’t move.

Your wrists and ankles are bound. Beneath you, a hard, cold surface presses against your back each time you try to break free. You take a deep breath. You need to calm yourself to think clearly. As you glance around, you realize you’re indoors; the forest now feels like a distant memory. The room you’re in looks like an ancient church, but unlike any you’ve ever seen. Unrecognizable sigils are painted all over the walls, and the candles appear to float in midair. Maybe you’re dreaming? It’s a strange dream, not quite a nightmare, because despite being tied up, there’s no immediate threat.

At least, not yet.

A tall silhouette approaches slowly, stopping just at the edge of the candlelight’s shadow, keeping itself partly hidden. And for the first time, you hear a voice. It was deep and low, sending chills down your spine. “Let’s see if she’s worthy.” Across the room, three other silhouettes approach you, none as tall as the one who spoke. And that’s when you feel that something seems off. They climb a few steps and surround you, towering over you as you are still lying down, not able to get away from your restraints. “Please, let me go.”, you plead, but you’re quickly muffled, you feel a hand over your mouth, pushing your head back against the cold surface. It felt human even though you realized it was covered in black ink.

Several other hands start to roam over your whole body, exploring and slowly detailing every inch of you. First, it was your hands and fingers, and then they crawled to your shoulders, leaving goosebumps on your arms as they brushed your skin. Another pair of hands was exploring your now bare feet, crawling up between your legs and thighs. You feel overwhelmed by all the attention your body is getting at this moment. You've never been touched like that, yet you still feel trapped, scared of what could happen in this abandoned house.

The tall figure finally steps closer, positioning itself beside you to get a better view. You couldn’t see its face as it was halfway hidden by a mask. All you could see was a mouth covered in black ink and bright white teeth. When you take a look at the others, they all were wearing masks. All different, and covering their whole faces. You could only see their eyes. It looked human yet you still weren’t a hundred percent sure.

"Her body is burning," one of them murmurs to the taller figure, who nods silently, a wide grin cutting across his jaw. It may have been a silent order as the three figures around you begin to undress you, tearing your shirt and unzipping your jeans. And then, they become more invasive, forcing you to open your mouth so they can slip two fingers inside, running it around your lips, and teeth, pulling on your tongue to feel its warm wetness.

You gasp when you feel the remnants of your shirt being yanked off your body and your pants being pulled out entirely. The stone surface beneath you is freezing, a sharp difference with the heat radiating from your body. You’re in shock as tons of feelings are storming in your head, and your breath shortens as fear invades your mind. Your heart is beating fast as you desperately try to free yourself.

But in vain.

The three pairs of hands pin you down, holding you firmly in place. They each, put a hand on your now bare skin, letting a trail of dark ink in their wake. One hand caresses the space between your breasts, while the others grip and knead, thumbs tracing slow circles over your nipples. You feel a heatwave go through your entire being, your little bud of flesh rock hard under their touch.

You should get scared, you should fight back but something in the way they touch you, and the intoxicating fragrance of the candles pulls a soft moan from your lips, escaping against your will.

Hearing the sweet sound you just made, the taller figure puts his big spidery hands around your throat, squeezing slightly. You gasped as you still had two fingers down your throat pumping in and out slowly, saliva drooling at the corner of your lips. Then, his hand trailed up to your forehead where you were hurted, gently caressing your wound, the ink covering his body mixing with dried blood. “Sleep will heal that. You’re too beautiful to wear bruises.” His voice was a low growl. He seemed satisfied with how you were responding to them all. “Let her breathe, II”, he adds and the smallest masked figure took his fingers out of your mouth, smudging some black ink by wiping off your saliva. “Blessed Vessel for bringing you there”,II whispers as he and the others slowly release their grip, their hands leaving your skin.

Sleep? Two? Vessel? What was all that? None of it made sense, and you weren’t sure you wanted to understand. As if reading your mind, the one called "Vessel" speaks again. “Don’t worry, sweet thing,” he walks around you to be close to your feet. “You are the prettiest offering that ever laid on this altar.” 

The three other figures bow in front of Vessel, whispering that they were all envious about what would happen before returning to the shadows.

The masked figure in front of you suddenly seemed even darker. You could now see his black-inked torso, the line of his thin abs almost shimmering with a dark glimmer. The room starts to hum, the air buzzing around you. The air, crisp and cold before, was now warm and humid. Thick black ink was slowly dripping from the church roof, levitating in the atmosphere and reaching the altar. Vessel raises his arms to reach for it and in the blink of an eye, the gooey texture formed several tailed and tentacles coming from behind him. He smiles and cuts off all your restraints, pulling you close to him at the end of the altar.

You watched in awe, how the dark figure who looked human before, was now transformed into something else. It was like he mutated into a kind of entity, an ancient deity, dark and forgotten. The tentacles, cold and slippery crawled over your body like snakes. It almost felt like tongues licking every inch of your skin. Two encircled your ankles to pull your thighs apart and the apparent god in front of you smiled. A devilish grin shows his sharp white teeth as he licks his lips at the view before him. You were full on display, your skin all flushed, a thin coat of sweat making your body shimmer under the candlelight. Your pussy dripping wet as you involuntarily started to get aroused by the whole situation.

“Let the ritual begin”, Vessel announced as he raised his head, looking at the levitating black thing. You didn’t know what it was supposed to be and you don’t even understand what was happening since you woke up on this altar. But all of this was beyond your human imagination and consciousness. Though it looked like a sacrifice of some kind. Before you could ask a question, two big dark hands landed on your thighs, keeping them apart. You gasped in surprise and your eyes went wide when you saw Vessel coming down on his knees. The tails around your ankles forced you to put your legs on his shoulders and you could hear him breathing you in. “Sleep will be so satisfied. It will now be your only purpose, until the end of times.” You jolt when Vessel’s tongue lapped a fat strip of your folds. He hums, savoring your taste and scent, sending vibrations through your whole body. You shiver and squirm under his touch, your back already arching to chase the pleasure. Vessel chuckles at your eagerness and while he dives back into your pussy, three other tentacles crawled to your body. Two stops at your breasts, kneading them and circling your nipples again while the last one slowly coils up around your neck to reach your lips. It tightens around your throat, forcing you to open your mouth for oxygen. But the tentacle makes its way between your plush lips, playing with your tongue.

Again, you felt overwhelmed and your first orgasm arrived quickly, the sweet sensation like a huge wave. “Oh my god, please I- I’m gonna cum god please!” You were a mess, desperate to finally get your release, but Vessel stopped right before you could actually let go. “I am your only God now.” His voice was different from before. It was now a deep, low whisper like someone—something—else was talking. Suddenly, Vessel’s body was towering over you as he kneeled on the altar, his hand splayed on the stone on both sides of your head. The tentacles let go of your ankles, neck, and mouth but you were still trapped under him, his hips between your still parted legs.

You wanted to say something, you wanted to beg, but for what?

You were frustrated your orgasm was denied but you also were still lying there, being a part of a strange ritual for an unknown force. You tried to guess some answers in Vessel’s eyes but all you could see was his dark wide grin and his white and red mask with three pairs of black eye sockets. “You were made for me. Now swallow me whole.” A thick and long appendice forces its way into your tight pussy, stretching you as it slipped in one go. You scream, not really sure if it is because of the pain or the hint of pleasure you finally start to feel again. It was buried so deep inside of you it was hitting behind your navel. You realized it was Vessel’s cock when he started to circle his hips slowly and that the tentacles encircled your wrists above your head. He pulled off almost entirely before diving back. “You’re so worthy.” Again, he starts to piston into you slowly, repeating himself every time he dives in. “You’re so worthy.”

His movement became faster as he buried himself even deeper, making you moan and gasp. Your mind was empty and you were lost in the pleasure Vessel was offering you. His teeth were grazing the skin of your neck and you could feel his hot breath as he whispered. “Beg for me. Show me you’re worthy.” And without hesitation, you plead. ‘Please, please I need to cum.” But the deity wasn’t satisfied.

Vessel speaks again, Sleep’s voice reaching your ears. “Praise me and I’ll offer you what you want.” It was an order, not an asking. But you weren’t really yourself anymore. You were drunk by the fragrance of the burned flowers invading your mind, and without a second-guess, you begged again. “You’re so good to me, I promise I’ll be good to you too.” you moan as one of Vessel’s hands lands on your throat, squeezing tightly. “You can take everything, I’m yours. Forever and always.”

You could have begged even more at this point because of how much you were influenced by your surroundings. But you didn’t need to. The deity’s pleased enough with your prayer and promise.

The entire room buzzes and a whirlwind blew off all the candles around you both. The church was dark for a second before the sigils on the walls you noticed before started to glow. When you looked at Vessel again, the sigil on his mask was gleaming too, his hands and tentacles tightening his grip on you as he pumped into you faster and faster. “Cum for us.” He demands and there was the strongest orgasm you ever had. It hits you like a tsunami wave, that —oh so intoxicating—white hot burning feeling rising from the depth of your belly. You cry as it snaps, your pussy clenching around his length, your release drenching the altar. Vessel didn’t stop, the overstimulation making your body shake and your legs squeezing his waist. “You’re ours now.” He growls in your ear before his cock twitches in your abused pussy, hot ropes of cum painting your inner velvety walls. At this moment you felt full.

Full of him, full of a new force, full of love.

Your pussy was still pulsing around him, and Vessel relaxes his body as he lands on you, letting his weight press over your form. Your scent and heat were mixing together as you felt your eyelids grow heavy. Vessel murmured something to you but your mind was already wandering, your soul far away from your body. 

You groan as you wake up, feeling like you overslept. Your body is sore, but when you try to remember what you did last night, your mind is foggy. Did you fall somewhere, somehow? You’re pretty sure your forehead was bruised.

You sigh, exhausted, looking at your alarm clock. It’s still the middle of the night. You decide to wash your face and drink water to clear your mind, but fragments of memories flash before your eyes as you stumble into the bathroom. A low hum buzzes in your ears like a distant whispering voice. “Worship me now, until the end of time.”

Shaking your head, you pinch the bridge of your nose, trying to shake off the strange sensation and fragments of memories. Everything is blurry, clinging to your mind and skin in an uneasy sensation.

As you stand in front of the sink for water, you dare to look up at the mirror, and your eyes widen in fear. There’s no wound left on your forehead, even though you remember falling last night.

All you can see is the soft glow of the sigil engraved on your sternum.

[7grandmel]

Todays rip: 21/03/2024

Poké Village

Season 5 Featured on: SiIvaGunner's Highest Quality Rips: Volume C

Ripped by XxFemBu55yL0V3RxX

I've yapped on and on before on here about what the true core of SiIvaGunner is, be it comedy, emotion, shitposting, community, lore, what have you. There obviously isn't one true answer to that question: it's all subjective, not just based on your own reading of the channel, but your own experiences with it. As an aspiring writer, I love digging deep into its narrative and theming, the stuff found in Nice, Slick, Blackness and NIGHTMARESCAPE 〜Unrestrained HyperCam 2〜 (Final Boss Phase 2) - but other people are far more invested in the act of ripping itself, the people who go the mile beyond that even I do and keep up with all the various fan channels, or even make rips themselves. But no matter your angle, there's one thing that binds everything together, the thing that Poké Village and so many other rips represent. To share what you love, and love what others share.

I'm sure that at this point, Violet Snow Memories is one of my most-linked posts on this blog, but that's exactly because it represents that theme so well. Kyle Hyde's duology of DS Adventure games aren't exactly worldwide phenomenons, yet there are still people out there - people like Uncle Fill - who wish to share their love for the games in any way they can. And in turn, I myself have enjoyed hundreds of rips representing games and franchises I've never really engaged with much, franchises like Touhou with Imperial Touwer or Sable with Sable's Stickerbush. But it doesn't really matter whether or not I'M a fan of these series, when its ever-so-evident just how much the people making these rips love them, the love you can see in the rips themselves. And hell, I've said it before and I'll say it again: It was Chaze the Chat's love for Maroon 5 as a band, its early history and distinct style highlighted in the rips on SiIvaGunner, rips like As Miku Collides, that got ME invested in the band in return. Each ripper on SiIvaGunner, each contributor and fan submitter, wishes to share a piece of themselves with SiIva's audience, and it's truly heartwarming to see how many of us are able to look beyond the boundaries of fandom to appreciate real quality.

Which, then, brings us back to Poké Village - a rip featuring the Pokke Village theme from the Monster Hunter series. First appearing when the series was still primarily on the PlayStation Portable, and only reappearing on the core-fan installment Monster Hunter Generations. The franchise is far from niche, the song far from obscure - but it still isn't exactly a theme known to those *outside* of the Monster Hunter sphere, in the way that we for instance all know the tune of Green Hill Zone without having played a Sonic game. SiIvaGunner isn't exactly a gathering spot for the Monster Hunter community (the games themselves have a pitiful amount of rips on the channel), but by just Poké Village alone, you may be fooled into thinking otherwise.

What XxFemBu55yL0V3RxX's created here is a beautiful 7-minute arrangement of the aforementioned Pokke Village theme, initially led by the very same nostalgic Game Boy hum that leads much of the Johto Pokémon games' soundtracks. The extensiveness of the arrangement alone speaks volumes - it reminds me of rips like Jesus of the Underground right off the bat - but its hardly where the rip stops to impress. For one, I think the choice in game to use for this "bait-and-switch" arrangement is incredibly smart and quite deliberate. As an outsider, I need not have played a Monster Hunter game to get a sense for what Pokke Village is like, due purely to my associations with Ecruteak City and how those feelings are leveraged in the rip. I have no nostalgia nor attachment to any Monster Hunter game, yet the emotion present in just the rip's first half alone, the way the theme swells and settles, it conveys the rural village atmosphere pitch-perfectly. And all of it is, of course, elevated by the rip's unexpected twist - the remarkably seamless switch from the Pokémon GSC sound, to something far closer to a ground-up arrangement.

At first, I drew the conclusion that it was directly based on the Ecruteak City or Cianwood City theme of Pokémon HeartGold/SoulSilver, the 2009 remakes of the Johto Pokémon games for Nintendo DS. And while the arrangement feels incredibly similar to the sound of the DS, from the samples used to their quality, I can't directly connect the instruments used to either of the two city themes (which share a melody but with differing arranges). Yet the vibe is what truly matters, XxFemBu55yL0V3RxX is able to harness the warmth and comfort of those familiar DS-era samples to further bring home the sheer vibe of the Pokke Village theme that elevates the rip beyond its starting point, beyond its initial concept. I love pleasant surprise escalations like this, like I covered back in Plantasia 2, and much like that rip itself - I love how Poké Village is using it purely to further push a message of affection for a piece of media XxFemBu55yL0V3RxX seemingly holds very close to him.

Melody swaps between themes with such similar atmosphere are always some of the most surefire hits on SiIva, I'm reminded of just how quickly Aquadial enchanted me to name just one. And Poké Village certainly fits that mold, but I'm enamored by just how far XxFemBu55yL0V3RxX went to celebrate this theme that many of us are likely still rather unfamiliar with, to champion a franchise otherwise so underrepresented on SiIvaGunner with a seven-minute tribute covering two entirely different styles of arrangement. And it makes me so happy that it all worked, that the rip was able to hit the way it does without me having ever played a Monster Hunter game. Or in other words, that I was able to love the piece of himself that he shared in this rip.

[suedesongs]

These Are The Suede Songs 001: Early Recordings

Suede’s early trajectory is often described, especially by the band themselves, as “the world’s longest overnight success”. Four years of slogging the toilets of London, from playing humiliating gigs to, on one occasion, nobody at all, to appearing on the front page of Melody Maker, may sound quick, but in musical terms can feel like a lifetime. This was during the era of musical trends coming and going in rapid succession, a little like fashion microtrends today. Within those four years, Baggy and the Second Summer of Love, The Stone Roses and Spike Island, raves and ecstasy,  made way for American grunge - precisely the opposite, and amongst this cultural shift, quietly grafting their way, were Suede. 

Whilst there aren’t a great deal of surviving bootlegs or demos from this era, I still felt incredibly compelled to cover what I could find in a dedicated post. Research was rather fruitless at times, and I found much of the writing on this period of the band’s career to be marred (cough) by the insistence of male writers to throw all of their energy into a somewhat troubling obsession with what is perceived as the infamous Anderson-Frischmann-Albarn “love triangle”. I took to Twitter (or, blegh, X) to vent my frustrations, and received a reply from my friend Tasha who, much more eloquently than I, expressed how Justine Frischmann is viewed as merely an object in an interpersonal drama, rather than a fleshed out musician in her own right. Are women doomed to simply be accessories to their male counterparts? I find this disheartening when Frischmann is so integral to not only the Suede “story”, but, in my opinion, to what would go on to become the sound we all know, and love.

My analysis will frequently include my personal opinions, and should not be taken as definitive. Where necessary to the discussion of the songs, tidbits of info may be provided in order to “set the scene”. This series should not be used as a biography, but instead an exploration of a body of work. It will be by no means objective. I’m a massive Suede fan. I’ve travelled up and down the country for gigs, queued from as early as 6am for a coveted barrier spot, my cat is (in a roundabout way) named after an obscure Bloodsports-era B Side. I’m a self-professed fangirl. Having said this, I’ll do my best to not let this get in the way. And with all of the preliminaries seen to, we begin with,

Just A Girl (Anderson/Frischmann)

Though credited to Anderson-Butler, this light, airy folk ballad is reportedly the oldest surviving Suede tune, dating far before Bernard Butler joined. The version that appears online, and on the deluxe edition of the debut, is likely a home demo recorded by Brett Anderson and Justine Frischmann. 

Anderson, in his memoir Coal Black Mornings, explains the titular girl, “north of England way”, is a Middlesborough-born Chemistry student called Emily, with whom he shared a flat on Daisy Bank road in Longsight, Manchester, in the year after he moved from Haywards Heath to the rainy industrial Northern city. ‘Just A Girl’ really couldn’t be set in any city other than Manchester. It describes the beginnings of a fond friendship, perhaps more, distinctly against the backdrop of a harsh, wet winter, overlooked by grey skies and red-bricked former warehouses. It’s the first, blushing, awkward flushes of young love. It’s leaving your University lectures at half past three when it’s already pitch dark. It’s when you say something you shouldn’t to the person you fancy after a few drinks. It’s huddling under the covers to stay warm, the excitement of closeness and companionship. 

I typically have a complete, and near visceral, aversion to anything, musically or otherwise, that can be described as “twee”. Just A Girl, I feel, does undeniably dangle its harmonies and lyrical depictions of turning the page of one’s favourite book perilously close to the jaws of this accusation.Yet, I simply cannot bring myself to dislike it. Whilst musically competent, if a little naive, it’s sweet and genuine, and for that, it’s rather lovely. 

There are already some allusions to Anderson’s later lyrical themes; the combination of love and tragedy as he laments how “it could have been so different if we’d only had more time”. Anderson, as we’ll explore, is rarely one to write a straight love song. No matter how they may seem, there is always a thread of tragedy, or drama, which underpins the affair and protects against it veering into saccharine territory. 

For a few years now, I’ve cited the “ashtray eyes and bootlace ties” line to be a direct harbinger of some of Anderson’s later lyrics, most likely thinking of 2011's ‘Brittle Heart’,from his solo album Black Rainbows. However, this is in fact, lifted from Ian Drury’s ‘Sweet Gene Vincent’, more directly alluded to with Anderson and Frischmann lamenting how “Sweet Gene Vincent was never that good”.

According to Anderson, on regular rotation on the turntables of himself, Frischmann and Mat Osman around this time, were a band called The Lilac Time. Quoted in David Barnett’s comprehensive biography, Love And Poison, he describes them as “quite light, leftfield pop sort of thing (...) lots of major seventh chords”, and this influence is abundantly clear on ‘Just A Girl’, and would have possibly done even more had it made it to the studio around this time. 

Frischmann’s, when she and Anderson met, record collection was largely comprised of folk music. In an irritating display of arrogance, Anderson insisted that these records would “no longer be listened to '' with him now in the equation. This decision would, of course, prove seminal in the trajectory of Frischmann’s music career in Elastica, as Anderson introduced her to spiky post-punk, however I find this to be rather ironic considering the undeniable folky nature of this particular song.

‘Just A Girl’ would later be re-recorded by Anderson and Richard Oakes, possibly around 1994, though reports of this vary, but not released to the public until a B-side was required for the single ‘Attitude’ in 2003. More on that (much) later, of course. 

Natural Born Servant (Anderson-Butler) 

‘Natural Born Servant’ is the actual first song in our timeline to be written by Anderson-Butler, and sees Suede as close to flirting with Baggy as they ever would. 

As a result, this one comes across as rather trite, not to mention overlong, clocking in at six minutes and twenty seconds. 

During my initial re-listen in my research for this project, I found myself incredibly puzzled as the chugging, Madchester intro spluttered into a half-hearted groove, before realising I’d gotten it entirely confused with a later track, ‘Be My God’. Frischmann shows herself a competent backing vocalist, possibly more so than Anderson. One YouTube commenter, possibly humorously, alludes to him “doing a Phil Oakey”, and there is indeed a resemblance. Anderson’s, however, is more naive, though he can certainly carry a tune and his voice is pleasant and sweet, possibly to the song’s detriment, when one considers the subject matter. 

Much like a large proportion of Suede’s work, ‘...Servant’ sees Anderson dallying with sexual imagery, and more specifically, BDSM imagery. This attempt, however, whilst enjoyable enough, is surprisingly sexless. It’s almost a feat in itself to write about sex in such a decidedly virginal manner, but I’m glad this was a theme he stuck with throughout his lyrics and it hints at greatness yet to come. More interestingly, however, is the use of sexual imagery as a commentary on class struggle. “You’re a natural born servant/this is the time to open your eyes”, can be viewed as a submissive accepting their place, or a working class individual gaining class consciousness and becoming aware of their oppression in society. 

I must say, I’m glad that this was as far as Suede’s relationship with Baggy really went, at least in the recordings I could find and actively listen to. It’s common to speculate of a song like ‘...Servant’ being indicative of a type of “alternate universe” Suede, but I couldn’t disagree more with this. Suede and Baggy just doesn’t work, and they would have always found their sound one way or another. 

Justice (Unknown, possibly Anderson-Frischmann-Butler) 

Surprisingly, this is the only song of this lot that I find myself drawn to the YouTube search bar to listen to out of choice. It’s almost certainly my personal favourite of all of the pieces we’ve covered here.I even found myself lip syncing to the chorus as I wrote this very paragraph! Oddly, I can’t find too much to say about it. It’s a sweet little, possibly even catchy, slice of Jangle pop. One of the thousands of happy-sad breakup songs of the late 1980s and very early 1990s. Anderson likens it to Aztec Camera’s ‘Oblivious’, which is a far, far better citation than the endless Smiths comparisons I once myself fell privy to, which have since become a cliche.  

We again hear Anderson’s vocals not quite having come into themselves yet, there’s a hint of insecurity and hesitancy. They’re so far removed from what we understand as his vocal styling, that one YouTube commenter on the version I found asks if Butler sings vocals. There is present, however, a deep understanding of melody and an undeniable hookiness. I can see myself going back to this one for the odd listen. 

Wonderful Sometimes (Unknown, possibly Anderson-Butler) 

Gary Crowley, the geezer-ish presenter of the Sunday Afternoon show Greater London Radio, was the host of Demo Clash; a competition held each Sunday on the aforementioned radio station. As the title suggests, this was a show where London bands would send in demos, that would go head-to-head in a public vote. As pointed out in Love and Poison, however, this would largely amount to a game of “who has the most mates”. Anderson would later show dismissal, if not outright disdain for ‘Wonderful Sometimes’. In Dave Thompson’s Suede The Next Life, First Time Around, he describes the song as “shit (...) nothing to get interested in. (...) [GLR] was a little local station, and we’re talking about London where everyone’s in a band.” Still, it would end up on a compilation cassette called What The World Is Waiting For compiled by Adrian Gibson, programmer at Powerhaus on Liverpool Road, N1. 

According to the Discogs listing, the idea was to showcase ten up-and-coming bands who were performing at the venue during this time (from a title like that, go figure). There was additionally a launch night at The Powerhaus, and Gibson was interviewed by Crowley to promote the gig. 

As for the song itself? ‘Wonderful Sometimes’ contains a few witty one-liners, “you couldn’t liven us up with a cattle prod” and “i’ve heard of happy ever after / it was just a joke but you could die laughing” particularly stick out. Personally, I quite enjoy “Do I just love you ‘cause you look quite good”, but that’s because, as a young-ish woman and a passionate fan, this is an accusation I’ve had levelled at me in the past, and I know I’m not the only one! 

‘...Sometimes’ is viewed by many as the holy grail of early Suede recordings, but for something so revered, it’s a decent enough piece of music, but it’s nothing special, even in the context of the other songs we’ve covered. Musically, I try to avoid Smiths comparisons, but here it’s unavoidable as the whiff of William, It Was Really Nothing and even some base notes of Heaven Knows I’m Miserable Now, is enough to give you a migraine. Butler’s playing really is more Marr-ish than Marr, but drenched and sadistically drowned in a wah-wah pedal at times, eliciting a comparison to Fool’s Gold, though, mercifully, this is over much sooner. 

More excitingly is a noticeable shift in Anderson’s vocal styling, now carrying slightly more confidence and having something of a personality. Here, he’s sounding almost like Robert Smith of The Cure, minus the “Robert Smith-isms”. A deliberately but self-consciously Sussex drawl (The Cure, and Smith, were from up the road from Haywards Heath in Crawley), and a slight nasal intonation. 

Ultimately, I don’t so much understand the hype around this one - the reviews on RateYourMusic are unanimously positive, but it’s a jolly tune and, likely because of that, decidedly un-Suede.

[bizarre-blorbo-bracket]

SEMIFINAL Poll 1: Bostonian Horse from puppet history vs Davis (Juror 8) from Twelve Angry Men

Propaganda under the cut:

Bostonian Horse:

he died onstage (due to the great molasses flood), met god, and accepted his own death all while being the musical act of the episode (the second half of the song is a duet with god) (listen to his song at the end of the great molasses flood episode of puppet history it's SO GOOD). later we find out that he went to horse hell. he's currently in purgatory with a bunch of other puppets because of his sort-of soul. his wife frequently appears to talk about video sponsors. he is drenched in molasses for at least half of his screentime. i want to throw him into the ocean and see what happens, then put him in a salad spinner to dry him off. in conclusion: horse

Davis (Juror 8) (these are all from the single submitter)

a quick lil list babes, and I apologise for all of this in advance:

He's from the fucking film 12 angry men. like, aside from letterbox bootlickers and middle school hass students NO ONE has watched this film let alone care about it, it was made in 1957, is shot almost exclusively in one room and the entire film is just middle aged white men yelling at each other over whether some not white poor kid should be sent to the electric chair. what the fuck.

Henry Fonda, the actor, was 52 years old at the time of filming

Henry Fonda is the father of Jane Fonda, the woman who would revolutionise the 80's with her home workouts and her blindingly neon leg warmers.

His name wasn't revealed until the very end of the film and even then it's just "Davis."

I could honestly give him a lil smooch

He's absolutely not girlypop but he's the ally-iest ally who's ever allied

He's categorised as a "Benevolent Leader" on the Heroes Wiki

instead of the overwhelming urge for me to coddle him like most all other blorbos, i would appreciate it switched

I have a photo of him inside my saxophone case and sometimes i forget he's in there, then he creeps into my saxophone bell and when I play it he shoots out like a ballistic missile

Dude, on ao3 there's more fanfiction about the real life 80's British punk band The Clash than the entire film of 12 angry men, let alone Davis (80 fics come up under the clash, while 10 come up for 12 angry men)

I have a counter, and I've watched 12 Angry men a total of 145 times. The figure is up on my wall in tallies. whenever the number goes up, I like to watch it in 5's so then I can put another full group of tallies on my wall.

I have incredibly detailed stories about how Davis would boogie down to ringo starr's solo career, and they're written within the margins of a book called Tobruk written by Peter Fitzsimons. The only reason I reread that book is to wonder at my elaborate works of fiction

My HASS teacher was the one to introduce me to 12 Angry Men as he played it for the entire class. He gave us a set of questions to complete on the film and a few Law based questions as a little treat, and he expected it to be handed in the next day. What he didn't expect was an 11 page monster of a response that included social commentary, 4 paragraphs dissecting the character of Davis alone, deeply discussed comparisons between the landscapes of politics and law in the 50's to the present, and basically an entire point-for-point summarisation of the film, completed with obscure quotes from Truman, Eisenhower, Nixon and Presley (Elvis). He presented the printed masterpiece in front of the entire class to shame me.

After class he explained how his favourite Juror would either be 6 or 5, because 6 seems like a big dumb teddybear and he just liked 5. I explained how I liked Davis because he didn't want to send a kid to die, then he told me how Davis would make a good cowboy (at this point in time I was unaware of Henry Fonda's role in Once Upon A Time in The West) and I proceeded to go home and write a 3 part orchestral composition that I could pretend would play as the soundtrack to Juror 8: A Cowboy's Tale or something like that

I had started to make an animation meme starring Davis but only gave up when photoshop literally deleted itself from my laptop

I didn't even hear that Juror 8's name was Davis when I first watched it in class, somehow I only heard it on my 6th rewatch but when I did I literally got so excited I literally got winded and cried a little bit, I had to take a panadol because I got so lightheaded

I have learned the musical motif that plays throughout the film on saxophone, clarinet, recorder, guitar, bass, ukulele, piano and trumpet

I have visions of him

One of Davis' 3 children HAS to be gay and nothing can convince me otherwise

honest to god I'd be a home wrecker if it came to him

I quote not only Davis but the film a lot, and sometimes in the dead silence of all my friends I go on about how the old man couldn't have possibly made it to the door in such a short amount of time to see the kid running down the stairs (because the old man has a limp, and Davis proved it my limping around the room, which I have to say was incredibly attractive of him)

He's literally an architect

I once had a dream where Davis was in my bass guitar case when I opened it, and i literally just picked him up and started picking him like a bass guitar until I tried to play a full chord and he bit the hand that was meant to be on the fretboard. I dropped him and he fell on his ass, and when I said "what the hell dude what was that for" he said bass chords are lowkey ugly to listen to, and since then i don't like playing bass chords because now they're lowkey ugly to listen to. before this ordeal, i enjoyed them, but alas

i once got my romantic partner to write me a davis x reader fanfiction as a birthday present

my parents believe that Davis is my first celebrity crush, and while they're actually wrong it's still actually so embarrassing they believe that because OH MY GOD it's literally JUROR 8 FROM 12 ANGRY MEN

I've attempted slam poetry about him

I've eaten a paper printed full a4 size photo of his hand

I would also not mind him to be literally my father, but given the rest of the things I've just said about him that's really weird and I recognise that

[hopeaterart]

Aaaaand I'm done for busts of other characters in TMNT: From the Hidden City because I didn't feel like drawing fullbody refs! In order from left to right (and under the cut because this is long), we have:

Slash, the leader of the Animal 5, an amateur garage band/vigilante group in the Hidden City. He's a tortoise yokai, and somewhat hostile to the Turtles at first since they seemingly came out of nowhere during the Tournament. Nonetheless, his heart is in the good place.

Mona Lisa, a member of the Animal 5. She's a salamander/axolotl-like alien, and her temper (which matches Raph's easily) doesn't undermine her intelligence. She and Raph quickly bond over how much they have in common once the initial hostilities are gone.

Leatherhead, a member of the Animal 5. Unlike the others, he's a mutant, mutated from a baby alligator that was splashed in Mutagen the night the Turtles were made. Unlike the Turtles, he didn't get the luck of a caring parent when he somehow escaped back in New York, and was forced into horrible things by his captor. Nonetheless, he was eventually able to find his way back to the Hidden City. Despite his scary appearance, he's a sweetheart.

Mondo Gecko, a member of the Animal 5. He's a lizard yokai and an otherwise regular civilian in the Hidden City, content with living a simple life. He got in the Battle Nexus on a bet and for a chance at the prize money, but found a talent for fighting along the way. He's the more relaxed member of the Animal 5, and was the one who came up with being a band to cover their vigilante activities.

Miyamoto Usagi, an apprentice member of the Hidden City's old guard. He's very dedicated to his training, and his peers describe him as incredibly mature and talented for his age. The only person who's been able to get underneath his mask is Leo, who's earnestness and kind heart are able to drag out Usagi's own inner child. He has a strange power that allows him to peer in other universes, and often uses it to ask advice from a certain older, more experienced version of himself.

Shinigami, a sorceress who was born in the Foot. She's Karai's most trusted associate and long-time girlfriend. Compared to said girlfriend, she's much more laidback and casual, and more willing to have fun on missions. She's still very much loyal to her. Some could argue she's more loyal to Karai than she is to the Clan... her magic allows her to hypnotize people and transform into a cat.

Jennika, a member of the Animal 5 and a frog yokai. She's actually a spy for the Foot, having been recruited during the Battle Nexus by Karai. She keeps them updated of what's happening in the Hidden City, but slowly comes to questions herself as the story progresses. She fights like a boxer, and can secrete poison.

Koya, a bird Yokai and a recent addition to the Foot. She was recruited during the Battle Nexus by Karai, and is part of her squad as a scout, archer, and air fighter. She's quick to attack and dislikes hesitation, conflating it with cowardice. Once Karai leaves the Foot, she very quickly realizes how insane everyone in it truly is without a buffer (Karai), but she believes that leaving now wouldn't do any good.

Bepop and Rocksteady, two thugs who were mutated by Draxum during his test runs of the second iteration of mutagen. They were hired by the Foot as muscle before Donnie could administer the retromutagen, and they often serve as comedic relief to Karai. The both of them are also complete idiots.

Goro and Blaze, Karai's mentors and technically her adoptive fathers. When Shredder isn't around, they run the Foot Clan to the best of their abilities. Goro knows bits of magic, and Blaze possesses enough brute strength to level a building.

Kirby O'Neil, April's father. He's a comic writer and illustrator, and created a relatively obscure comic that's just popular enough to pay the bills. Even so, he has an additional dayjob as an editor for a journal so he can make sure his daughter doesn't miss of anything. He's a hardworking man who often worries for his daughter, but can clearly see that she's at her happiest being friends with four green weirdos. His necklace is a gift from his late wife...

Lou Jitsu, Splinter's former identity. Martial Arts master. Even better at improvising with things such as ladders and fish. Movie star and celebrity. Bisexual icon. Once yelled out 'Hot Soup' instead of 'Hatsu' during the heat of a fight and it became his catchphrase. Has had it enough with the casual racism and homophobia of the early 2000 that he ran off to another dimension to marry his girlfriend. Certified monsterfucker.

Dr. Honeycutt, a technical war criminal from another galaxy. Regretful of his past as a weapon maker, he escaped to Earth where he was found by the Hamato clan. He is a friendly being, who's regret over making weapons have made him take a vow of pacifism he swore not to break.

And the Crying Titan, also known as Venus. She crashed onto Earth a few millenias ago, and is responsible for a bunch of things. From creating Yokai-kind (accident) to giving the founders of the Hamato clan their powers (willing). Baron Draxum was her student, and his mourning of her death at the hands of a nascent Foot Clan quite literally resulted in him creating the Hidden City.

If you have questions about any of them, or the plot of TMNT: From the Hidden City, don't hesitate to send me an ask!

[tiredassmage]

15, 21, 29, 32! tyr c; and B) what inspired you to create this character?

I said I was keeping these for patch day, and then I slept until they finished maintenance anyway. And then I further had to sit and stew on a few of them, lol. BUT ANYWAYS. There were some really fun ones in here, so thank you!

[Uncommon questions for OCs + their writers]

15. How do they speak? Is what they say usually thought of on the spot, or do they rehearse it in their mind first?

Tyr’s genuine accent is, to steal Garza’s line, pure Dromund Kaas and it’s more than just the sound, it’s the way he often speaks. On the ‘job,’ at least. Nine is proper and trimmed, clear-cut around the edges like a soldier presents in their dress uniform - all the more razor-sharp in the rare times he’s incensed to enough anger as to raise his voice - it's incredibly rare because his anger typically manifests more like ice than fire, sharpening hissed words into quiet threats and stern glares more than explosive displays, but it has happened.

In general, Tyr doesn’t give his word lightly. He’s built a life on reading between the lines of others’ speech and is more than capable of speaking in the same quiet, roundabout ways of objectives and ideals when it comes to his work, but Tyr values his promises. When he tells someone they can rely on him, he’ll do all in his power not to disappoint. A Cipher is often acting and reacting almost simultaneously, but Tyr is almost always thinking before he lets words fly. As a Cipher, he needs information. As a leader, as a friend, he wants to make sure there’s no doubt about his commitment.

21. Why do they get up in the morning?

Tyr’s drive to keep doing, to keep taking apart bits and pieces of himself and reassembling them the way he does as both Cipher and Commander is the hope that him doing it will spare someone else the necessity and the pain. The older he’s gotten, the more of the same war in different shades he’s kept fighting, the more tired he grows of it, certainly, so it’s still perhaps relatively recently that Tyr has consciously been keeping a quiet eye on potential exit points. He grows weary of the absolute scale of it all. No one can keep striving for those kind of heights forever.

But, beneath it all, he does genuinely believe in what he’s crawling through all this muck for. He believes in people having the ability to make their choices, to lead their own lives. Idealism, in a way, has gotten him this far, and he’ll keep digging for it until his legs give out from under him and he’s unable to stagger back to even his knees in recovery if he has to.

He lives to see some kind of end. He’s not sure every morning what that ‘end’ is, or if it’s the same as the one the morning before. He’d like to hope its one where he can see Theron’s still half-asleep smile in the mirror appear over his shoulder a lot more often and with a lot less stress holding both of them back, but… that’s an ideal. And Tyr rarely has the heart to truly sugarcoat things. Obscure them in half-truths, certainly. But it’s harder to outright mask that part of his honesty.

His smaller scale reasons, then, are things like seeing that smile, being able to hold Theron’s hand. The skies over Odessen are honestly some of his favorite - it’s the closest he’s ever been to calling a physical place home. The simple joy of sitting behind flight controls. The camaraderie of sitting in the cantina banded together with some of the Alliance’s long-term personnel, listening to chatter and friendly bullshitting.

Yes, there’s a lot of pressure on his shoulders. It weighs heavy. But he’s got more of those little things to fight for these days than he’s had in… a long time.

29. Do they usually live up to their own ideals?

Keke, yes and no. And only ‘yes’ if you allow him to maintain the double standard with which he functions. Arguably links back to the last question in that Tyr deconstructs, reconstructs, and bends pieces of himself because he’s been doing it long enough and with the still somewhat-naive hope that it might spare even one other person from going through the pain. The problem with that, then, is that he’s kind of shit at enforcing his own boundaries because he’s more or less willing to shift most of them around based on the job or role he’s being expected to play.

Tyr does not take kindly to others being forced into those scenarios, however. If he has any authority in the situation, he can be almost vehement in his correction. He’ll draw attention to himself as a distraction if that makes it easier. So, bottom line, probably… not really. Not in a way that others would agree with, I imagine. Not at his core, when he genuinely pledges I will do anything for you to someone. That “anything” has incredibly few exceptions. And, even if he gets better with time and the right people around him to encourage him out of living so deep in the past and the way he’s wired himself for so long, he’d still prefer to throw himself upon the pyre first before he compromises someone else.

32. Do they have a go-to story in conversation? Or a joke?

Few had consistent stories to tell about Cipher Nine, even among his own crewmates. Tyr has, however, occasionally made Theron nearly choke on his caf by, rather unprompted-like and very dryly, musing that, “I’ve heard Belsavis is nice this time of year,” particularly in the thick of trying to reconcile Imperial and Republic differences in the Alliance. Theron’s threatened to punch him. Lana makes that disapproving face. You know the one. Tyr still hasn’t told Theron the exact details of what he really knows about prior operations on the planet. If Lokin’s been within earshot, he hasn’t physically shown it, but I’m sure it’s scribbled down as a concerned note somewhere to make disapproving parental faces at him at some point.

Also, rumors about Tyr’s prior musical training and experience follow him into the Alliance. Let’s just say that one night, when the drinks were flowing particularly easily, some personnel may or may not have initiated a dance-off. Aygo has been dealing with distracted troops gossiping about their Commander essentially ever-since. Lana’s sworn to secrecy, Theron might blush almost as red as his jacket if a particularly determined individual tries to wrangle the secrets out of him, and the Commander? The Commander merely smiles wryly before sipping carefully on his caf. Theron’s scowling behind him about that smug expression.

B) What inspired you to create this character?

Tyr’s "creation myth" has become my favorite joke (... or running gag? Bc this is. Genuinely how it just Happened) lately because he was very, very genuinely meant to be “just some guy.” I’d gone through probably about half of the other class stories before I finally decided one night I’d cave and see what all the Imperial Agent hype was all about, but I’d also heard it was best played last because it’s good. Went double because I have a soft spot for the spy-action flicks in my heart.

Honks clown nose, I can concur that it’s good. Couldn’t tell anybody else to practice restraint and save it for last though because obviously I’m obsessed.

Anyway, so I very consciously remember telling myself “make just some guy, some like, generic pretty-boy lookin’ ass, so he… maybe won’t consume your entire existence.” Like a fuckin’ clown. And then I gave him gray eyes. Like an absolute buffoon. I was doomed from the start. And Tyr came together relatively… as the story unfolded with him. I’d say I found his morals, despite his loyalty first - or relatively early at least, so I had to ask what had created that in someone who’d grown up in the heart of the Empire? That led me into his somewhat rocky relationship with his family and how, in a sense, he was a bit of an outcast among them, so he found his place outside of their path, outside of the sharp gaze of his mother, that both exposed him to some of the more shadowed elements of the Empire when he was still young and played into his dedication to the work later. Tyr is a product of his training more than Imperial science projects, which I think ultimately plays into how Nine is seen as an unpredictable and almost rogue element that can’t be controlled. There’s still an edge of human to the operative - the kind of independent decision-maker Keeper admired and wished to maintain in a field agent, but exactly the kind of agent that was quick-witted enough to become self-aware of the precarious line he walked between duty and scorning their would-be masters.

Anyway, I guess the more, like, deep story to his creation is his name and that is also mostly a series of accidents. I wasn’t really in the throes of a Dragon Age phase iirc, but it was on my mind, and I liked the sound of ‘Teyrn,’ which in short for the non-Dragon Age among us (hilariously, I’m not the biggest DA person either to be explaining this) is a nobility title. And the rest is just kind of, again, a series of happy accidents until I had a name that was fun to say to my little monkey brain. Which ultimately gave us ‘Tyr’ from a longer in-game keysmash lookin’ bastard because, eventually, he consumed my soul and I decided I’d be obnoxious on the blorbo website about it. So, he needed like. An actually decent name.

And, topically, I think I yolo’ed the shit out of not knowing his full name until, like, the Alliance era. Because suddenly, I was dealing with characters that had no reason to call him ‘Nine’ and more understandable reasons to actually know his name. ‘Deckard’ I think I pulled together from… influence from a spy-esque character in a movie that came out a few years ago. Don’t embarrass me if I admit it might have been one of the Fast & Furious titles, okay? I don’t remember for sure. So, uh… I suppose, in short, a series of happy accidents, lmao. ‘Tyr’ also having such vague mythological ties as it may is another one of the happy accidents, though possibly something my subconscious influenced when I settled that that was his full first name. Either way, the uncertainty around the mythological figure played well with the role of a Cipher to my monkey brain - perhaps particularly with Nine’s nebulous legacy as the last survivor of Imperial Intelligence, both their pride and, perhaps, part of their downfall.

[randomvarious]

Today’s compilation:

BBE Sampler Volume Two 1999 Funk / Disco / Jazz / Deep House / Future Jazz

Oh, fuck yes, dude! I've been in a bit of a rut with the dope finds during this holiday hangover week, but this compilation from the BBE label has got me reinvigorated, so let's go!

BBE really is just one of the greatest labels to ever do it, folks. The London-based outfit has always kept it eclectic since its mid-90s inception, reaching across every continent besides Antarctica to deliver all kinds of music that's tangentially rooted in either jazz, soul, funk, or R&B. And there have been countless genres that have manifested themselves over the years from those genres too, from neo-soul, to future jazz, to broken beat, to disco, to hip hop, to downtempo, to house, to drum n bass, to breakbeat, to trip hop, to electro, and more. BBE releases all of it. They are one of the premier labels for crate diggers, founded by a pair of crate diggers themselves.

And those crate diggers, Ben Jolly and Peter Adarkwah, are the guys who compiled this album and they also appear on its cover. And what they show with this release is that BBE's status as an elite label is two-pronged: one, they are excellent at presenting crate-dug gold from the 60s through 80s, and two, they're one hell of a contemporary label that releases its own stuff as well.

And they prove it with this set of fourteen tracks. The first nine out of ten range from relatively obscure to flat-out obscure, featuring a soulful funk deep cut from former Impressions lead singer Leroy Hutson and a handful of gems from fleeting acts you've likely never heard of, like Sandi and Matues, who deliver some incredible funk, and Clyde Alexander, whose terrific piece of early 80s disco, "Gotta Get Your Love," appears to be the only song that he's ever released.

Then, with the final four tracks, BBE struts its own contemporaneous stuff with a breakbeat-y future jazz trip that features a piano and trumpet solo from the great Amalgamation of Soundz and a couple phenomenal deep house offerings from Aydin the Funki Chile (aka ATFC) and Albert Cabrera, the latter of which includes some sweet, extended electric guitar soloing 🤘.

Not many labels out there that can both effectively do their own crate-digging thing and also make their own fantastic contemporary music, but BBE's one of them, and that's why they're so good. They simultaneously show deep appreciation for the old and they also keep an underground spirit in heralding in the new 😎.

Got volume one of this short series in my queue too, so stay tuned for that post coming soon.

And check out this other BBE post I made last year also.

Highlights:

Lorez Alexandria - "Send in the Clowns" The Sunburst Band - "Monte Carlo" Getto Kitty - "Stand Up and Be Counted" Leroy Hutson - "Lucky Fellow" Basement Khemists - "Everybody" The Delegates - "Pygmy Part 1" Sandi and Matues - "The World" Clyde Alexander - "Gotta Get Your Love" Record Player - "Free Your Mind" The Amalgamation of Soundz - "Things Amiss" Family of Eve - "I Wanna Be Loved by You" Aydin the Funki Chile - "This" Albert Cabrera - "Majestika (Main Mix)"

[poohwhin]

mandela catalogue volume 4 LONG thought dump. (for my dialovers followers i apologise for clogging your dash)

also big massive tw for this series.

OKAY SO. SOME THINGS! i’m a little bitch and pause the video every 15 seconds, so excuse me. but this also means that i can give you my rambling thoughts for various timestamps SKSKS. i’m not a theorist. i’m just a guy with some thoughts. you can actually skip all this bs if you want since i did an ACTUAL post abt my thoughts HERE.

[ 𝟎:𝟎𝟎 — 𝟐:𝟑𝟗 ]

we’re started with an explanation on the earth’s creation (in relation to christianity). which i always find it very interesting when we’re able to see the connections to religion, even if older bible cartoons and vhs style stories are a little unsettling to me.

but then seeing (what i’m assuming to be) gabriel’s statue just. standing there with his face obscured, after the text “awaken my son” appears is. wow. (definitely had me pausing my video every 3 seconds and hiding behind my phone.) i’m not gonna lie, i never expected alt! gabriel’s influence to go back that far into the christian lore. man’s been here from the jump i guess. (and ofc we get the infamous forbidden fruit scene, and eve becoming painfully aware and scared of the man looking down at them)

[ 𝟐:𝟓𝟎 — 𝟑:𝟏𝟐 ]

i have no real thoughts i just find the idea of someone names O’Brien calling to say hello to Dave to be incredibly endearing for some reason. SKSK. LIL DAVE HAS A FRIENDDDD. (also the windmill cgi(?) i’m diggin it.) also dave’s friend is religious which is. making me anxious for the both of them. SKSKS but O’Brien’s a band member which i find cool as hell.

[ 𝟑:𝟐𝟖 — 𝟒:𝟎𝟔 ]

LIVE ACTION DAVE MOVEMENT?? AHHHHHHH. WHENEVER WE’VE SEEN HIM HE’S JUST BEEN THIS SILLY LITTLE IMAGE. god i live for the live action scenes tbh.

also local businesses havent been doing so hot? man i wonder why. could it be the population dropping by the thousands (/j)

AYO ONE OF THE EMPLOYEES WHO WORKS WITH DAVE FOUND A TAPE FROM THATCHER? AHHHHH??? “same old procedure” , oh dear. i can only fear for what this tape holds.

also found out that Dave himself isn’t religious. which now makes me wonder about the position he’d be in when encountering an alternate. (O’Brien is also so nice though omg. understanding man.)

[ 𝟒:𝟏𝟑 — 𝟒:𝟑𝟔 ]

i just wanna say that alex’s cinematography has gotten SO MUCH BETTER? HELLO? these long black screens have really got me on edge, even though not really any of them have been leading to anything particularly scary. also the employee stealing the tape thatcher sent to, presumably, go watch it 👁️. oh dear oh dear.

BACK TO HIS FILMING SKILLS FOR A SECOND— everything being in black and white as well as him focusing on large silhouettes is just. UGHHHH 😩😩😩. what im assuming right now is some sort of tv has such an intimidating silhouette my goodness. (also “property of dave!! hands off!!!” i love him SKSKS)

[ 𝟒:𝟒𝟐 — 𝟓:𝟏𝟒 ]

ooooo static on da big screeeeeeeen. if its the intruder im literally gonna shit myself omg. he scares me sm.

THE TODDLER STRESS ASSESSMENT VIDEO?? OH NO?? HHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

(at 4:55) WHAT THE FUCK IS ON THAT TV?? HELLO? WHAT? THE FUCK? IS THAT AN ALTERNATE? FUCK THOSE GUYS

( at 4:58) nvm it was a drawing.

eugh i paused on the drawing.

ngl if that’s a child’s drawing i am. very concerned? because why is a child drawing something that realistic and morbid, i am. CONCERNED. but also the intruder is actively stealing children en mass so maybe we have other issues.

[ 𝟓:𝟏𝟐 — 𝟓:𝟓𝟓 ]

i’m ngl i thought that was a face instead of the back of someone’s head.

THATCHERRRRRR

youtube closed captions the audio is not “foreign.” pls.

(at 5:21) bro why did thatcher do a tiktok trend with his delayed ass walk.

wait why are we seeing thatcher’s day to day from this perspective?? is this significant? if it is i think its odd. us just chillin in his cabinet.

[ 𝟓:𝟓𝟔 — 𝟕:𝟓𝟏 ]

omg kid named lola. (also i feel like i’ve seen that last name before but im too lazy to check sksksks). also they’re in art club??? are they the kid who drew the drawing before?? (i mean they’re on the NEWS, SO—)

AYO MISS SARAHHHHHHHH. MISS SARAH HEATHCLIFF HELLOOOOO. (and omg she’s the founder of the paranormal club at BHS??)

(at 6:25) THE LITTLE GHOST ANIMATION IM SOBBING HAHSHSH. HEY LITTLE FELLA.

omg we’re seeing how sarah and adam met. so neat 😩 (also i cant make out the name of the hs adam goes to but it starts with a W. youtube closed captions also arent doing me any favours SKSKS?

adam grew up in mandela?? noice.

bro this silence is kinda freakin me out but that has nothing to do with the video SKSK

SARAH AND ADAM BPS FOUNDERS WOOOOOOOOOOOO

[ 𝟕:𝟓𝟕 — 𝟗:𝟒𝟓]

omg more live action i love it 🫶

(8:26) “look at it and don’t look away” WHATRE WE LOOKIK AT BOYS?? mentally preparing for a jumpscare rn.

the night vision lens scared the fuck outta me my god.

audio lure BITCH ARE THEY LURING PEOPLE OUT?? HELLO? THE HELL ARE Y’ALL TRYNA LURE WITH THIS?

(8:50) oh you got me fucked ALLLLLLLLLLL the way up. I’M WITH SARAH TBH I’D BE SCARED AS HELL.

BRO THERES THE HAND. AH HELLLLLLLLL NAH THERES A FUCKING HAND.

THERES MULTIPLE HANDS. THERE ARE MULTIPLE HANDS?? THEY ARE? EVERYWHERE? BRO?

ngl if this was the sort of ‘norm’ that adam was dragging them to, then i kinda get it. but also i’m an adam apologist so i’ll defend him for the rest of my days.

(9:23) GOD THAT WAS FREAKY AS HELL.

[ 𝟗:𝟒𝟔 — 𝟏𝟎:𝟐𝟔]

i’d be scared as hell too so its okay sarah 🫂🫂 like imagine you think you’re starting this quirky paranormal club then right outta the gate its like “DEMONS 👹”

omg :( sarah’s dialogue reminds me a lot of jonah’s from vol 2 with how she’s starting to think twice. but at least she’ll still do everything else 🫂

“two years later” so are they both 19?? 17?? idk the timeline here but they started bps in high school, so.

[ 𝟏𝟎:𝟐𝟕 — 𝟏𝟏:𝟏𝟓 ]

omg new characters in here. ofc we got sarah, jonah, and evelin but we got a tyler and amanda too? 👁️ damn what happened with amanda 😞 (also jonah and adam stoners confirmed?? tf y���all getting 25mg of? SHARE BITCH?) i also made a note to pay attention to the dates even though my ass will forget.

(jotting them down here: eve: just now | sara: friday | jonah : jan 7 | tyler : jan 2 | amanda : dec 19 ) idk if these are important but i got ‘em.

(10:45) SHAWTY REMOVED JONATHAN AS A CONTACT? MANNNNNNNNNNN. also omg we got a noah?? does he have an arc? (ik i’m so hilarious)

also adam fr give my girl eveline some closure 🙄

[ 𝟏𝟏:𝟏𝟔 — 𝟏𝟑:𝟐𝟏 ]

adam my boy ily but pls learn your “there’s”. c’mon.

idk how i feel about adam’s picture being in black & white while sarah’s is in colour. that’s either important or adam is just emo as hell. (also theyre both grainy as hell. ik its 2009 but c’mon SKSK)

“ and idk what happened to him” changed to “pretty sure he’s dead or something” MY BOY BAHSHSHSHS. “idk he might be dead or smth. rip” LIKE ADAM. SHAWTY. THEN HE JUST MOVES ON LIKE “NAHNAH LEMME GIVE YOU THE GOOD NEWS!!!” BAHSHSHSHS

(12:32) oh. sarah’s pfp change. OH NOOOOOOO. SARAH NOOOOO. okay its back to normal nvm.

“i didnt think it would be that big of a deal” adam. bby. your friend is DEAD? shawty looking out for himself, so power move i guess SKSK.

(13:21) “i dont have friends” okay emo ass.

[ 𝟏𝟒:𝟎𝟐 — 𝟏𝟒:𝟏𝟒 ]

sarah just been going OFF. POP OFF. also adam hanging up like a lil baby 🙄

“no wonder evelin left you” DAMNNNNNNNNNNN

[ 𝟏𝟒:𝟏𝟔 — 𝟏𝟔:𝟏𝟒]

damn mandela county went from 19,867 to 1,075 in just 19 years. also, thatcher :( he sounds SO BROKEN and SO TIRED. his actor did so good :(.

HIS MONOLOGUE ABOUT RUTH. IM GONNA SOB SO FUCKING HARD. “i’ll make you proud ruth” IIIII HATE IT HERE. SO MUCH. also “the darkness followed me home” i will cry so hard dont play with me

[ 𝟏𝟔:𝟑𝟎 — 𝟏𝟕:𝟑𝟎]

Thatcher’s room is just like mine for real.

JESUS I FORGOT THIS SERIES WAS AN ANALOG HORROR FOR A SECOND. GOD I HATE IT. the idea of something being in your house but not DOING ANYTHING. GOD. LIKE NOT MOVING SHIT AROUND OR PROWLING. JUST STARING AT YOU. FUCK. AND ITS JUST THERE LIKE “🧍 lemme talk to you about your car’s extended warranty”

the fact that thatcher and his alternate are having a staring contest has me cracking tf up. they like: “LOL HELLO??”

[ 𝟏𝟕:𝟑𝟐 — 𝟏𝟖:𝟐𝟗 ]

OH THE LADY WHO WORKED WITH DAVE WAS EVELIN IM AN IDIOT BAHSHSH. but omg dave is in SHOCK. THE GLASSES CAME OFF. him finding out evelin went through the shit >>>> but him firing her :(

[ 𝟏𝟖:𝟑𝟎 — 𝟏𝟗:𝟒𝟒]

omg. HES TAKING O’BRIEN’S OFFER AHHHHH

“remembrance”. oh dear.

OH MY GOD THATCHERS ALTERNATE? MOVING IN REAL TIME? HHHHHH. AND HE CALLED OFF ALL UNITS? EUGHHHHH. god alex is so talented with his cgi i stg. and the emphasis on how INHUMAN those face movements are. eghhhhhhh. that was some chameleon shit i stg.

(19:17) BRO BACK UPPPPPPPP. GOD BAHSHSHS. got ALL UP IN YOUR FACE, JEEZ. anyways.

“dead or alive you’re no use to these people” i will cry. thatcher :(

“a scared boy with a gun” AHHHHHHHH

[ 𝟐𝟎:𝟎𝟎 — 𝟐𝟏:𝟑𝟐]

him writing his letter to ruth. :( GOD I JUST WANT THEM TO BE HAPPYYYYYYY. I WANT THEM TO HUG, AND BE PEACEFUL. GODDDDDD

oh no he’s crying :( . THE ACTING IS SO GOOD IM GONNA CRY OML. thatcher is so sad dude. :((( “now your dead ‘cause i was so fucking scared” HNNNNNNNNNNNN.

so i’m gonna assume that thatcher is dead now? :( i hate it here.

[ 𝟐𝟐:𝟐𝟖 — 𝟐𝟑:𝟓𝟕 ]

youtube closed captions this is not applause.

adam what is this capcut ass video BAHAHSHHSS. COULDNT EVEN GET JONAH’S PICTURE IN 😭. A THREE SECOND “a celebration of life” BRO OF WHO’S? 🤨 HOW TF ARE THE SUBSCRIBERS SUPPOSED TO KNOW WHO YOURE TALKING ABOUT SHAWTY 🙄 god this kills me SKSKS

ADAM THIS ISNT ANY BETTER BAHSHSHHSHS. this man is READING A SCRIPT, BRUH. “jonah passed away peacefully” now you know damn well.

[ 𝟐𝟑:𝟓𝟖 — 𝟐𝟔:𝟏𝟓]

oh shit we got home footage now. ALSO CAN I JUST SAY? NIGHT VISION CAMERA’S ARE FREAKY AS HELL. i cant tell if its just normal motion blur/it tryna refocus or if theres ACTUALLY SMTH THERE.

omg its the preacher’s (or was it the messenger? idk) image. heyyyyyyyyy

OH WAIT ITS A DRAWING. i cant make out the words on it though. 😞 but the sentence itself looks like it was cut off, so even if i could read it it’d be incomplete.

BRO WHO’S HOUSE IS THIS? WHY ARE THE DOORS SO FUCKING TALL?? WHY IS EVERYTHING STRETCHED OUT?? is it just the lens or is this house ACTUALLY just wonky as hell.

ooo what’re we covering up??

DAMN JONAH WAS 21? and the mf’s middle name was edmund.

oh no.

this funky ass text is really gettin me. also adam really just spitting some hot philosophy to evelin 🤨 damn. tbh if i was told even HALF the shit he was told i’d be mad too.

(25:20) bro this video. oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear. also had me thinking that my youtube was buffering but nah thats just the video sksksk.

[ 𝟐𝟔:𝟏𝟔 — 𝟐𝟔:𝟐𝟐]

ooooo correspondence. alex is really THRIVING with words ending in “ence/ance” 😩😩

[ 𝟐𝟔:𝟐𝟑 — 𝟐𝟖:𝟎𝟎 ]

i have. no words. absolutely NO WORDS BAHAHSH. this post really just. sums up my thoughts SKKSS. nah but?? face studio 2 ??? where tf is the first one? anyways that demonstration video was freaky but i find it hilarious that alternates are sittin at their lil desktops customising their face <3 BAHSHHSS.

[ 𝟐𝟖:𝟎𝟏 — 𝟐𝟖:𝟐𝟖 ]

oh dear it transitioned to home footage. oh my.

OH. OH OKAY. WOW UM. HELLO MISS LYNN’S BODY

i’m assuming thats the intruder’s face in the corner. but the phrase ‘a thriving society’ with this image is. eugh.

“a thriving society of followers of the true saviour(?)” is that what was said? there was a lot more after that but after the word ‘true’ i could hardly make anything out.

okay everyone hold tf on because i’m about to try and make out what he’s saying at 28:03

“a thriving society of followers of the true saviour. his entangled (?) limbs danced around my bedroom. i held my breath. and waited for it to stop. i was too scared.” then it glitched out from there, but i assume it repeated some of the stuff already said???

hey stinky.

[ 𝟐𝟖:𝟐𝟗 — 𝟑𝟏:𝟐𝟗 ]

OMG HEY EVELINNNNNNN.

omg wait she’s looking for thatcher. 😰😰😰 oh dear oh me oh my.

(29:48–30:00) GOD these long pauses are unsettling as hell SKSKSK.

(30:06) thatcher?? hello sir. i guess my earlier thought about him being dead was wrong SKSKSK. BUT IM GLAD(?) AT LEAST? i’d miss him for real. ALSO HEY DAVES BACKKKKKKKK.

dave sounds like he’s been crying. i mean i could be completely wrong and it’s probably just the audio editing but man.

“how much of that was really worth it though” i mean he got a point.

“find a new meaning in life” the fact that he’s saying that to THATCHER hits.

[ 𝟑𝟏:𝟑𝟎 — 𝟑𝟏:𝟑𝟒 ]

malignance. alex here again with the SAT words 😩😩

[ 𝟑𝟏:𝟑𝟓 — 𝟑𝟐:𝟏𝟒]

Evelin’s sitting at Thatcher’s desk, oooooooooo

MISS MA’AM WHY ARE YOU LOOKING THROUGH HIS DRAWERS SKSKSK.

[ 𝟑𝟐:𝟏𝟓 — 𝟑��:𝟒𝟕 ]

i love the cgi and backgrounds and shit. gives me early black and white movie vibes. or even some later films and edward scissorhands beats.

OMG DAVE. IS AT THE CHURCH?? oh shit that means i’ve gotten to the moment everyone’s RAVING about.

O’Brien’s become an alternate hasn’t he. the inflection in his voice is off.

(33:25) IM SORRY? DID THE HEAVEN’S THEMSELVES JUST FUCKING OPEN? HELLO?

[ 𝟑𝟑:𝟓𝟎 — 𝟑𝟓:𝟏𝟓 ]

FUCKING GABRIEL IS BACK AHHHHHHHHHHHH. idk how to feel about this disney villain ass voice though.

(33:56) ew i hate featureless figures so much HHHHHHH THE SCARE FACTORS ARE STILL HERE

bro gabriel really is the joker rn good lord SKSKS. but him impersonating O’Brien’s(?) voice. AHHHHHH

omg wait, ive been seeing things say that dave offed himself (which is likely true) but im gonna assume that the dark substance running from his eyes is blood?? in my head that IMMEDIATELY makes me thing of how you should never look an angel(?) in the eye (i think thats the thing), because you won’t be able to comprehend it. even though he 99% offed himself i think to thing he died from looking gabriel in the eyes.

okay i take that back there’s blood pooling from his head. he likely threw himself off a ledge or smth.

also hi gabey wabey would you be interested in maybe. NOT? DOING THIS?

[ 𝟑𝟓:𝟏𝟔 — 𝟑𝟕:𝟎𝟗 ]

oooo we got evelin lookin through some filessssss. and theyre ADAM’S FILES, OOOOOOOOOO.

okay so adam is also 21. gotcha gotcha. so adam was 4 when he was yoinked through the TV.

OH! adam didn’t react to anything on the toddler stress assessment? oh jeez. this kid’s got some guts ig idk. SKSKS.

(35:59) BRO DID SOMEONE LOCK EVELIN IN? THOSE LEVERS ARE FOR LOCKS, RIGHT, or maybe alarms or smth idk.

oh shit oh shit.

“Mr. Davis?” LITERALLY ANYTHING BUT.

(whoever) SET OFF THE ALARM?? MANNNNNNNNNNNNNN. alarm systems are scary as hell dude my god. got me thinking of purge sirens.

OH HELLLLLLL NO. i really like the use of the spinning siren lights to create atmosphere though. vv nice <3

[ 𝟑𝟕:𝟏𝟎 — 𝟑𝟗:𝟎𝟗 ]

omg the messaging sequences are back. and SOMEONE’S BEEN TRYING TO CONTACT HIM? HELLO?

“Hello! We have been trying to contact ADAM MURRAY. Is this you? Please confirm YES or NO” “Hello! We have been trying to contact ADAM MURRAY. Is this you? Please confirm YES ”

unsettling as hell.

OH! HELLO THERE!

STANLEY??? YOU’RE TELLING ME THAT THIS WAS STANLEY THIS WHOLEEEEEEE FUCKING TIME?? AHHHHHHHHHH.

“with contorted flesh and broken bones i made myself known” aw he just wants a friend SKSKSK.

“your skin is not your own” UM!!!! also ngl i never expected him to be so gentle with the children he takes.

“you are not the real you.” SIR?!?!?! SIRRRRRR??

[ 𝟑𝟗:𝟏𝟑 — 𝟒𝟎:𝟓𝟑 ] ; 𝐄𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐓𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬

uh. wow okay. SKSKS. THERE WAS SO MUCH IN HERE AND I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS. which i will try to compile in an actual post that isn’t my own brain dumb. <3. but uhh

“I deceived them. the mandela prophet. it begins today” wow thats cryptic. then pictures of ADAMS FACE? HHHHHH. okay anyways if you made this far ily. <3

[mysticstarlightduck]

hi! for the rainy day ask game:

🌦️ Overcast: Which character do you think readers would love the most? Which character do you think they would dislike?

Thank you for the ask, @kitkins13! Let's go with the cast of What Lurks In The Hollow

ASK GAME HERE

🌦️ Overcast:

Which character do you think readers would love the most?

I think that vote would be stuck between Dylan, Zach or Christine. In all honesty, the whole cast of this WIP has a lot of different personalities that I did my best to make unique, so every MC character in this WIP would probably be someone's favorite once the book's out lol. But I think those three would absolutely be the at the Top 3:

Dylan Millihan:

Overall Description/Vibes: 23M, a reserved, emotionally unavailable mess of an young man who is trying his best and is probably more overworked than it would be healthy but pretends he's fine by using a social mask of bad mood and distance from strangers. Cares about his little sister immensely but generally doesn't know how to show it verbally so just shows it through quiet actions and hopes for the best.

Appearance: Tall, handsome, has medium to long hazel hair vaguely styled in a 80s-90s way, usually wears black button up shirts not buttoned up all the way and jeans. Prefers boots over sneakers.

Zach Taylors:

Overall Description/Vibes: 16M, an incredibly charismatically charming goth kid who likes freedom above everything and who has some serious self-esteem issues that he hides behind a facade of confidence. He's Amy Millihan's best friend and love interest as the story progresses. Zach loves music, skateboarding and reading books from his vast collection he stole from the library.

Appearance: Average height, skinny, usually wears improvised goth style clothes including a shirt with the logo from his favorite yet obscure band, dark grey jacket with DIY spikes and small chains, black fingerless gloves with ripped fishnetting, spike studded black converse sneakers + dark nail polish and eyeliner. Has short, yet messy dark brown hair.

Christine Nespor:

Overall Description/Vibes: 22F, a laid-back wanderer with a love for all things funny, from jokes to pranks to hilariously bad movies, but who is also really wise when it comes to life and gives top tier advice. Loves a good amount of harmless chaos and probably knows more than a few really strange unsolved cases that really contrast with her wholesome personality. She's also Dylan's first friend and later love interest in Vinethorn Grove.

Appearance: Average height, has wavy blonde hair cut into a simple yet stylish bob, wears cutesy yet simple makeup preferring to add a small splash of color to her styles. Loves woven sweaters, twill pants and patchwork shirts, especially DIY ones, and wears vintage sneakers. Has a playful smile.

Which character do you think they would dislike?

Probably the villains, yeah lmao.

Take your pick 😭

Mayor Samuel Whitaker: Literal serial killer whose family is involved with bloody rituals with fey demons. Most of his victims are teens or kids because he "likes his souls young" (essentially the younger and more 'pure'/innocent the souls the more effective the sacrifices are)

Mrs. Adelaide Draycott: A 50 year old cougar/Karen who has nothing better to do in her life than to stalk Dylan (who is young enough to be her son at the very least) around to try to get him to 'fall in love with her'. When her attempts fail she fully becomes a Karen and decides to sabotage his entire life.

Sheriff Isaac Clarke: A corrupt, racist cop who thrives on nepotism and blackmail, often using underhanded tactics to get what he wants. Aids criminals if it means getting more power and literally 'calls the shots' in town. Also covers up the Mayor's string of murders and makes sure no investigations suceed.

Branden Heddam: Insanely threatening - probably drunk - biker gang leader who terrorizes innocent people and specially likes making his stepson's (Zach) life a living hell. The most abusive """"""parent"""""" figure known to mankind and has committed murders before due to his sheer brutality.

Cathleen "Cath" Edwards: The most annoying debt collector known to mankind who literally shows up unnanounced at the worst times and is so smug she could make Regina George cringe.

[c-40]

A-T-3 068 Show No Shame

From Electric Kingdom to Electric Boogie, break dance that is

Sugar Hill Records' West Street Mob, who had three members including Joey Robinson, Jr the son of Sugar Hill owner Sylvia Robinson (the other two were Warren Moore and singer Sabrina Gillison who is going home on this track)

Break Dance - Electric Boogie is built on one of hip hop's most famous breaks known as the "Apache" break, as it's taken from The Incredible Bongo Band's version of Jerry Lordan's instrumental Apache. There are so many write ups about the history of the "Apache" break there's no reason for another. Here's one https://www.stereogum.com/2025842/apache-the-samples/columns/breaks-with-tradition/

Jim Gordon drummer for The Incredible Bongo Band died on 13th March 2013. He played on many great records, The Beach Boys' Pet Sounds and was he drummer Eric Clapton's Dereck And The Dominos. In 1983 he killed his mother and spent the rest of his life incarcerated, although diagnosed as schizophrenic California did not allow the insanity defence at that time, he died in a psychiatric prison. Very sad but back to the hip hop

What's interesting is in hip hops 50th year it is Kool Herc himself that found this obscure record and would play it at parties "picking up the needle" or doing what he called the "merry-go-round"

One of the earliest uses of the "Apache" break on record would be Grandmaster Flash's The Adventures of Grandmaster Flash on the Wheels of Steel in 1981. Also in 1981 Apache had another appearance on Sugar Hill Records, The Sugar Hill Gang's Apache (Jump On It). The "Apache" break must have been slamming in New York at that time

Joey Robinson, Jr co-produced The Adventures of Grandmaster Flash on the Wheels of Steel, if that record is the early example of turntablism is Break Dance - Electric Boogie an early example of juggling on record, and surely that's Flash behind the decks?

"Apache" is a Bboy break and in 1983 breakdancing was making the headlines, it almost writes itself. At the time the vocoder is being used heavily on electro-funk records

FREEEEZE

West Street Mob - Break Dance - Electric Boogie

[razrbomb]

OBSCURE HEADCANONS.

Reze

what they smell like. cheap floral perfume from the konbini &. kerosene. after her shift from the café, she sometimes smells of coffee.

how they sleep. sleeping position. schedule. reze is definitely a night owl; probably survives off 4-5 hours of sleep per night ( on a good day ). she goes to sleep in the AM &. wakes up just in time for her shift at work — the café opens around 10:00 in the morning, by the way. typically, it doesn’t take her long to fall asleep ( give it about 5-10 minutes before she starts counting sheep ); however, reze is quick to wake up, as she is a sensitive sleeper easily disturbed by sudden noise or sensations. her bedroom has to be engulfed in darkness; no music or no other background noise lest she lie awake &. takes a longer time to fall asleep. she is always on her toes that even sleep, a natural state of vulnerability, doesn’t deter her from being quick to go on the offense. which is why she sleeps on her back, arms crossed over chest; think: the stereotypical dracula pose inside a coffin. as for nightwear, she is partial to wearing oversized shirts that goes past her knees; &. nothing else.

what music they enjoy. industrial, shoegaze, alternative rock, dream pop, breakbeat, &. electronica; her favorite bands &. music artists being NIN, b/jork, a/dam f, this m/ortal coil — anyone that can create ethereal soundscapes that makes her brain buzz &. shut off her thoughts; all vibes, no thoughts ( r.i.p reze, you would have loved t.a.t.u. though ). reze essentially has two moods: incredibly loud &. chaotic akin to static in her ears, or something more somber &. dreamlike that reflects her waves of emotions. overall, she loves distortion &. being able to feel a wide array of emotions purely from the music alone, the true universal language that surpasses language barriers.

how much they spend time getting ready each morning. give it about half an hour before reze goes out that door. of course, the typical bathroom routine takes less than 15 minutes; all she really has to do is brush her teeth &. take a quick cold shower ( cold water because not only is it good for her skin, but it tightens up her muscles &. jolts her awake ). so fresh, so clean after using cheap liquid body wash from the konbini. afterwards, she brushes her hair before styling it in a messy bun, putting effort into appearing effortless. ( you think her long bangs fall to the side naturally? hah! ). &. if she feels like it, she ends her morning ritual by applying a very light coating of make-up — mascara &. a simple cat eye on her top-eyelid to accentuate her natural feline-like features. that last part, that vested interest in maintaining a pretty appearance, truly became a daily habit after she met denji.

favorite thing to collect. cute mugs to drink her coffee with. though, she has a meager collection: 5 in total, all in display on her kitchenette’s counter top. her favorite is probably the light purple mug with a black cat decal on the front.

left or right handed. right-handed !

favorite sports. reze does not like spectating any sport; she finds the idea of watching other people play a game she can’t participate in to be incredibly boring &. tedious. as for active participation, she does enjoy swimming, funny enough ( seeing how water is like her kryptonite against her powers ). swimming &. being around water, in its wide endless vastness beyond her understanding, have always felt like a freeing experience for her, like she could forget about her troubles the moment she disappears into the wet embrace of the sea or the pool. had she lived an honest student life, she would have probably joined the swim team in high school.

favorite touristy thing to do when traveling. enjoying the local cuisine of the area, &. taking pictures of the sights &. the boring, mundane every day life of the people that live there. it’s like a scrapbook of the million of different lives she could have lived.

favorite kind of weather. she has really enjoyed the the warmth of tokyo in comparison to the unforgiving cold of her motherland in russia. it’s unfortunate that she burns so easily under the sun, because she loves the summer; specifically, on those sunny days when the heat feels refreshing &. there’s a nice languid breeze to alleviate the hot weather. all blue skies &. sunshine. adding layers of sunscreen on her face is an extra step to her morning routine when it’s her favorite time of year.

weird / obscure fear they have. tight spaces. anything that is reminiscent of a deprivation chamber; anywhere where she feels trapped, vulnerable, &. unable to escape from.

the carnival / arcade game they always win without fail. reze is a beast in rhythm games &. shooters. anything that requires perfect hand-eye coordination. she is definitely the girl that wins all the prizes for her dates at the local festival.

thank you, @primordyalsoul, for tagging me :* <3 tagging: @shinanai ( for denji &. dabi ), @violevin, @ymagishi​, @deathleads​ / @curseleads​, @sinwrote​ ( pick anyone you want to talk about ) + everyone on my dash ~ if you see this, do it!

[averystreams]

Inspired by the recent boom of mousegirl posts (and classic "talking animal" stories like the Rats of NIMH and Watership Down) this blog hereby presents;

The Meek Will Inherit

A lite 'lore-replacement module' for D&D 5e. Use this module if you want to: * play as little creatures going on big adventures. * play as an animal character, in a world populated by only animal characters. * explore oversized ruins and uncover terrible secrets. * have medieval-style adventures within 'modern' environs.

In a world where humans have inexplicably gone extinct; societies of woodland creatures have emerged to build anew. Having no firsthand knowledge of humans: the ruined cities they find throughout the world are thought to be the work of "a precursor race of Giants with incredible powers". These ruins are dangerous for travellers; full of traps and monsters. Though the humans are gone, animal species that formerly lived closely with humans now exhibit a kind of mad frenzy, with former "pet" species being most affected: becoming totally feral.

[The stats for each race remain as-written in the Player's Handbook, but have their appearance and backstory adjusted to match various woodland species. The size-scale of the game is altered to match the player-perspective: mouse, mole, and rat characters are treated as 'small'; squirrel, rabbit, badger, and raccoon characters are considered 'medium'. Relative to characters in this game, something the size of a human would be considered 'huge'. Determine relative monster sizes accordingly; for example, consider using the stat block of a Tiger to represent a combat encounter with a feral cat.]

The player 'race' options are as follows:

(Halflings ->) Mice: Numerous, but disconnected; originally having no central rulership. Formed the ambassadorial party that originally traveled throughout the forest from faction to faction and proposed the alliance between squirrels, badgers, and mice; as well as brokering peace treaties with the rabbits and moles in the outlying regions.

(Elves ->) Rabbits: Have no fixed territory, but range freely across the plains in nomadic bands. Train their young in the use of weaponry to protect themselves on their travels. Long nights under open skies have resulted in a form of cultural mysticism centered around weather and the stars.

(Humans ->) Squirrels: Lived in treehouse villages hidden in the canopy, developed their society in obscurity. Only gained awareness of other societies historically recently, but now squirrels are to be found in more and more places closer to the ground, and even under it. Guards and knights traditionally wear armor made from treated, carefully woven strips of acorn bark (stands in for 'leather' armors).

(Dwarves ->) Badgers: After generations of conflict the badgers developed metalworking techniques, forging protective armors and powerful weapons. Their burrows are now fortresses; resulting in a culture of reclusivity and a general distrust of non-badgers. Only with the relatively recent formalizing of the alliance have badger gates become officially open to others.

(Gnomes ->) Moles: Live in hidden burrow-villages. Some among them practice a type of mysticism in which they communicate with plants by tapping on the roots and listening to the response. Older plants respond very slowly, and mole sages have spent decades listening to the responses of mighty trees. (this replaces the forest gnome "speak with small beasts" feature). The moles tend to keep the secrets of the trees, believing that to follow the example of humans is to chase them to their demise. But in the age before the alliance a faction of moles splintered off and joined forces with the badger coalition, helping in their war effort by constructing devices based on what they had gleaned from trees about the bygone world of the humans.

The following species were among those afflicted with the Frenzy; probably as a result of living too close to the world of humans. They usually attack on-sight; but they are not totally mindless, and can sometimes be reasoned with: (Goblins ->) Rats (Orcs ->) Raccoons

[Since, in this module, 'races' are replaced with distinct species; human-hybrid (half-orc, half-elf) and modified-human (dragonborn, tiefling) races are not officially supported, but the stat block for a hybrid race may be taken in place of the stat-block for the non-hybrid version; i.e. half-elf -> rabbit, half-orc -> raccoon]

[These lore descriptions were created based purely on the special traits of the 'races' as described in D&D 5e. They are not intended as depictions of specific real-world cultures; all similarities are coincidence, etc.]

[alittlepudge-neverhurtnobody]

Remember when you posted about Roger from Rent? God I love me a washed up rockstar going soft. I just. Been thinking about that Yknow

AHAHAHA I DO, ANON and i am sending incredibly toxic vibes to spotify for removing the rent obcr and therefore making it impossible to add "christmas bells" to my holiday playlist, therefore making it impossible for me to celebrate the season by listening to roger davis talk about how getting fat is the one vice he has left, therefore rendering my entire holiday season INFERIOR

ok first of all anon this message is superbly timed bc i finally got my shit together and collected all of MY soft washed-up rock star tidbits into a cohesive masterpost, so if you haven't already gotten to know my OCs Hunter and Kate, now's your chance!

but uhhhh YEAH SOFT WASHED-UP ROCK STARS!! my favorite kind 😎 (though soft rock stars in their prime are a very close second.) rock stars who've accumulated a huge collection of leftover tour t-shirts that don't cover their bellies anymore. squeezing into tight jeans only to find that they don't button anymore ... or zip ... or fit over their hips.

this trope is so good from so many angles but i think my faves are, in no particular order:

1. ANGSTY: soft washed-up rock stars who fell out into obscurity and don't know what to do with themselves now, and are using food to cope with that aimlessness and lack of purpose. living on takeout and frozen meals bc they never learned to cook out on the road and sleeping too much bc what else do they have to do? staying out of the spotlight bc they're self-conscious about the weight they've gained and how different they look and how nothing fits the way it used to and they're afraid of what the tabloids might say. maybe they're in denial and keep squeezing into those old clothes to keep up appearances, or maybe they retreat into oversized hoodies and sweats to hide their new figure. lots of comfort-eating, lots of angstily learning how to reposition their instrument against their plump belly or learning how to move in time with it now that they're bigger and softer. soothing their ills with fast food and sweets and maybe going home to visit family for a while to lick their wounds while their waistline continues to expand ...

2. OWNING IT: soft washed-up rock stars who've just decided fuck it, it's punk to be fat, no one cares what they're doing or what they look like now anyway, so what if they lEt ThEmSeLvEs gO. they're finally going to enjoy actual good food instead of convenience store meals on the road or late-night instant noodles in the studio. doing livestreams for fans on their social media that are sometimes music but more often are cooking videos about the fun new recipes they're getting into on the side. (josh ramsay of marianas trench is not soft OR washed-up but he does sometimes do really fun cooking videos on his instagram!) doing road trips to visit friends and other band members and looking softer and softer in each picture they post. reveling in their new size and indulgence and posting cheeky pics of shirts that are starting to ride up or tattoos that are stretching as they soften up.

3. FUCKING FINALLY: soft washed-up rock stars whose partners have just been WAITING for the day they settle down bc they have an agreement to start playing with some kinky stuff once they do, and while they relax and figure out what comes next for their career, they let their partner feed them up and they put on plenty of well-deserved weight and get a lot of mileage out of all their old skinny jeans and tight t-shirts that are now a few sizes too small 😏 AND THEN when the band reunites after a hiatus or for an anniversary tour or something, they go back fat and happy and get to have some long-distance fun with their partner via video calls of junk food at rest stops and long phone calls to tell them about all the parts of performing and touring that have changed with their new bigger body. OR their partner is ALSO in the band, so before the hiatus/break/whatever they got to tease each other with kinky stuff but it wasn't feasible or sustainable while their career was still active, so they get to indulge all those fantasies in their downtime and then when they go BACK on the road or get the band back together or whatever, they have an established routine they get to adapt to their tour life and explore in that environment instead. sleeping in tiny bus bunks except one of them is much bigger now and oh no, what if you have to lie on top of me ..... and you're 300 pounds ......

4. AND THEY WERE BANDMATES: OR, OR, a combination of these where bandmate A is crushing super hard on bandmate B while they're an active band, but also bandmate A keeps thinking about how much they want to feed bandmate B and how fucking hot bandmate B would be if they were chubby instead of rail-thin/if the little belly they hide under t-shirts were a bigger belly. but their crush is unrequited/they never make a move but then shit goes down and the band breaks up and they don't see each other for a couple years bc of what broke them up. but then they all start talking again gradually and decide to try again ... except that, due to either scenarios #1 or #2 from this list, bandmate B has gotten pretty chubby since they last saw each other, and bandmate A is DYING at how their soft, plump belly pushes at their t-shirts and how their thick hips and thighs fill out their tight jeans and how their round, full cheeks make them even more adorable than they did the last time they were together. the reunion brings them closer together until they start to fall for each other, and bandmate B is self-conscious about how bandmate A will see them now that they're heavier, but bandmate A is SUPER INTO IT and it is not a problem AT ALL.

[kyotakumrau]

2021.06.05 DIR EN GREY SOGAI at Tokyo Garden Theater

01 DOZING GREEN - acoustic version

-Intro-

02 絶縁体・Zetsuentai

03 空谷の跫音・Kuukoku no kyouon

.

04 人間の被る・Ningen wo kaburu

05 Devote My Life

06 CLEVER SLEAZOID

07 DIFFERENT SENSE

.

08 赫・Aka

09 Ranunculus

-inward scream-

10 谿壑の欲・Keigaku no yoku

11 The World of Mercy

12 朧・Oboro

13 かすみ・kasumi

ENCORE

en14 Followers

en15 OBSCURE

en16 落ちた事のある空・Ochita koto

en17 Sustain The Untruth

en18 激しさと・Hageshisa

my report under the cut ↓

Today felt so weird at first. Getting ready it felt like I was going to another screening event, it took some time for it to sink in that today it's going to be different, that it's going to be an actual live concert. That they will be playing on the stage.

Even already waiting in my seat it still didn't feel real.

The venue, Garden Theater, is amazing. I was on the 2nd floor balcony B, so quite on the left (shimote), but the view was amazing. I mean it was not close to the stage, but the round shaped audience and steep steps between rows were designed really well. And I was lucky to be at the end of the row so I had a higher barrier to grab when headbanging. I made a proper use of it!!!! 😆

Around 4:45ish many of the venue staff came to hold the black curtain hiding the stage firmly, not leaving any chances we could have a peek?😅 Anyway, the walls, ceiling and curtain were all black with white 疎外 projected on it.

People were still coming in a bit past 5,

The PA table was ready but still relaxed. I had a quick look at the leaflets left for us at our seats. We were all sat separated with an empty seat even if you got 2 tickets together.

Finally at 5:13 the lights went off and the curtained opened. We were greeted by the sound of acoustic guitar first... three band members sat on chairs, Kaoru, Toshiya on the left and Die on the right, Kyo was standing, Shinya in the back on drums. The lights were quite dim with gentle spotlights on the members.

Acoustic DOZING GREEN. It was sush a magical start! It set the mood for 'no singing or shouting' policy. I loved this take so much🖤

And it finally felt real. A real live performance😭❤️

Btw there were so many cameras they definitely have plans to release the footage from tonight's show somehow, we should all just pray they will include all songs🙏

...and speaking of cameras, Shinya had a small camera riding around his drum set, from afar it looked like a model train set😂

After the acoustic song the staff quickly picked up the chairs to take them off the stage and the band members changed the instruments for the rest of the set.

In the background the intro for SOGAI was playing. I can remember a figure with their arms raised towards the sun or sky like in a prayer (the figure appeared later in one more video but I can't remember which song) and that DIR EN GREY 疎外 appeared as letters made of ice.

Kaoru had his hair slicked back, wearing dark/black clothes. Toshiya had the jacket with gold elements. Shinya white shirt and pink hair. Die had a long red jacket with a black spiraly pattern.

Kyo had very light blond hair and wore make up including two larger dots on his forehead, and a gold chain. He wore a jacket in the beginning, with a white shirt underneath. At first I thought he had a scarf but later on the front of his shirt and his chest was all red with (fake) blood so I think it was blood from the start.

We clapped when 疎外・SOGAI appeared on the screen and as they were to start. There was movement in the audience from Zetsuentai, we could wave our hands, headbang and so on, but it was so different not being able to sing and shout... but Toshiya definitely was doing great with all the back vocals and shouts that were usually done by us...I don't remember hearing him so clearly until today😆

Kuukoku followed and we listened.

After a short break when the four standing band members waited turned came Ningen wo Kaburu and a change of mood. We did great staying quiet but still staying active during the song.

The clapping between songs was fierce and often!

And OMFG the start of Devote! I gasped when the screen showed a gold Tokyo Olympics logo! But then the footage started to show the logo melting, multitude of gold coins, running in a race giant gold babies (like a disturbing image of a baby that seems like an adult made of gold) who then started to march like an army and held firearms, fighting, terrorizing, and then coins again and the gold Olympics logo again and it kept changing. And "価値が欲しい/ 生きる価値が欲しい / 残酷なお前が・I want to have a worth / for my life to have a worth / cruel you" had us all raising our fists. It was a very powerful performance. And then they followed that with CLEVER SLEAZOID. The setlist tonight was 💯👌

One of the videos had various scenes of war and fighting, even the dates 1941, 42, 43 and 44 with some descriptions under them, but they showed so many conflicts it was more as if to show that humans just keep fighting same wars over and over again...

Starting from Aka the mood changed again, they continued on the route to grab, tear and stab our hearts... was it all this time without hearing Kyo live or was it all this time for Kyo not singing live with dir... the raw emotions delivered cut really deep. The inward scream was just crying at first, gasping for breath, then Kyo stood up holding the mics wire, the mic bumped loudly against the stage and the crate, then Kyo returned to the crate and crouched on the top while he continued to cry. Keigaku tonight was one of the darkest performances of the song I've heard. And Kyo changed the lyrics at least partially in the beginning, at first was something about a birth? (I want the footage from tonight so bad)

The World of Mercy was just... so miserable. So unhappy. And by this time I had no doubts about the red on Kyo's shirt.

For Oboro they used the footage from the pv in the back and red lasers on the stage as well. In the beginning there was only one set on Kyo, who stood with his arms raised as in wanting to grab the red lines. Two more red laser sets were added to the sides, one on Die and other on Kaoru and Toshiya. They looked like lava or fire at times, especially when catching on things. Oboro was amazing live, it's such a strong song to pull us from where the World of Mercy has left us a moment before.

Also, Kyo's stand was updated with Oboro theme: the stand itself is quite plain but there's a big bloody pregnant belly with legs bend at its sides under the crate... it looks quite grotesque, like being tucked under a staircase or ...under the tatami.

They closed the main set with Kasumi. It was so wonderful to have Oboro and Kasumi back to back.

And then we clapped and clapped and clapped until they came back.

We got very powerful encore as well. To me Followers was to help us pick up the heart pieces and put it back together. And then the other 4 songs were to pump us with the energy. The headbanging, the ...hand-scream-pumps! And they all kept asking for more! All four of them started to walk to the other sides of the stage, coming to the edge of the stage. Ochita is a mighty song, we can respond so much now, I can only imagine what it will become in the future!!

The energy got so overwhelming, the energy we couldn't shout out, I couldn't help but start crying as we were still headbanging and raising and waving our hands.

Before Hageshisa Kyo kept shouting 'last song! Last song!! LAST one' and hitting the mic on his chest. We went mad.

They couldn't throw anything like they used to, but I think they stayed a bit longer on the stage because of that. They all had a good look at the audience before they left, Kyo first, waving us goodbye as he jumped down from his stand. I kept clapping and the rest of band members left one by one, Shinya, Toshiya, Die and then Kaoru last. Kaoru took a pick from his stand and saluted us as he was leaving. But I was crying too much at this point to notice more.

It was incredible.

It was like noticing what was missing when your life gradually started to grow dull but it happened so slowly you haven't realized it was happening. That energy, just, woah.

And then they announced the autumn tour! The video showed a dirty, polluted river and a boat with people in safety suits on it. And then the title came up and dates.

Desperate. So accurate.