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birb-boyo · 6 months

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LU BACKROOMS???

This is basically me describing backrooms based on the Chain, one on the safer side and one deadly and how to survive them :]

@trippygalaxy @vio-starzz @mushr0oms-and-m0ss @shadowlinktheshadow @raven-does-artstuff-894 @treasure-goblin idk who cares about this but I spent all day on it-

Time

His first liminal space is fairly safe. You can’t die unless you do something diabolical.

His safe room like would be basically like this

You fall down somewhere, probably on your walk home, but you pick yourself up and see that this is very much not the side of the road. This is a grassy field.

There weren’t many grassy fields where you lived. And even those fields were no where near as expansive as this one.

Upon looking around, you see a giant wall and a drawbridge. You start walking to it, thinking that you somehow fell hard enough to pass out.

You reach Castle Town and get weird glances from many. While you’re scouting the area, you spot a little boy in green picking up random dogs. You look at him weird when he puts one dog down and chases after another one.

The boy catches you staring and with one glance, you’re suddenly in that big grassy field again

So yeah, if bro looks at you, you get set back. After a while, this space will easily drive someone insane. This is because no matter what you do, you will meet him, and you both will meet eyes, and you’ll be sent back to the beginning.

So in a way, Survival Rate: 98% but it’s gradual and you might get out of there before you go insane

For his “You’re most likely gonna die” room

I wanted to incorporate Majora’s Mask into it, saying that the masks are hunting you.

There goal is to capture you and bring you to Fierce Deity. He thinks that you killed Link.

But you didn’t because this little kid who told you that he was who the deity was looking for is literally following behind you-

This kid could be regular young Link or Ben Drowned, though it would change the survival rate massively

Survival Rate for young Link: 67%

Survival Rate for Ben Drowned: 15%

This is because the only way to stop being hunted and/or not die is to present a piece of Link to the deity when you’re eventually caught

If it’s Link, he’ll accept it and call the masks off and you’ll be free to move on to the next hell or, if god loves you, you’ll go home

If it’s Ben, you better be fast on your toes because you’ll be hunted until you die or get out of there.

I want to also want to add that the masks don’t just pop up out of no where when they find you.

You know how you have to follow the music in order to learn Saria’s Song? Don’t do that. You’ll be caught

When they emit the Song of Healing, run, Link/Ben will be right on your trail and even if he wasn’t when you stopped running, he’ll always find you even if he leads a mask to you

I forgot to mention that Link/Ben will give you hints as to how you need to give Fierce a piece of his tunic or hair or something close to it

Also that Link/Ben physically can not get close to FD as they are, as the boy says, “part of the same soul”

Twilight

Idea given from @tiercel13 and @link-posting

That whole game has this unsettlingly warm ethereal quality where it's like- you're comfortable but uncomfortable at the same time and it's so weird

But basically I would say somewhere like a large field that's in perpetual twilight. You've never seen it before but it feels safe and familiar, like you've been there a thousand times. Still, there's something just slightly off, and it prevents you from ever being able to truly relax

It’s a village, deserted in the canyons, it’s wooden houses crumbling with time and weathering

Survival Rate: 100%

I think we all expected this one but you’re being hunted. It’s just you, the flora, the fauna, and a big wolf trying to kill you

It’s Wolf Twi but it’s not wolf Twi. Like, that’s the Blue-eyed Beast alright, but that’s definitely not Twilight. That’s a Wolf hardened by the need to survive. A need to eat.

The thing about this room is that it’s very survivable, but only to a select few people

For people who know how to manage in the woods, who know how to make fires without lighters, who know how to properly cook wild animals without utensils and iron, for those who are experienced in the wilds, they have a much easier time surviving this

But for those who are always inside and have little to no outside knowledge, you’re cooked almost immediately

This is a genuine hunt. This wolf can hear god knows how far, this wolf can track you with even the faintest scent

The only reason why the survival rate is as high as it is, is because it hesitates.

That’s how many survive their first encounter with the wolf, the wolf hesitates to take that final bite

I feel like the only real way to get out of here if to survive for a certain amount of time

Survival Rate: 52%

Warriors

Another idea by @tiercel13 because they are so big brained

For safe it's the castle barracks but they have a completely nonsensical layout

there's random doors where they shouldn't be and some of the actual ones are gone, there's things in the rooms like it's just been vacated but a layer of dust covers everything

It must be vacant right? Those shadows that lurk behind the corners are just you going crazy right? Nobody is here. Nobody is here. Nobody is here. Nobody is here-

Survival Rate: 87%

Idea given by @hyrules-feral-hero

You got claustrophobia? That’s too bad, you’re stuck in a fairy bottle now

You don’t get ripped apart or anything like that

Your death will be slow and painful

Conserve oxygen? There’s no reason to, you’re not going to be set free :)

Survival Rate: 0%

Sky

I feel like being blunt with this one

Safe space is just a vacant Skyloft

No one is around, just the occasional keese and Remlits and rapid Loftwings flying about so watch your head!

It’s peaceful and welcoming and airy but empty.

I imagine that this would bring about some sort of uncanny valley feeling, but that is probably the wrong word for it. Because who lived here? Why are these birds so big? Why are these raccoon cats so aggressive at night?

Survival Rate: 100%

Get Silent Realmed😌

Basically just that. If you don’t know what the Silent Realm is, it’s basically a thing you do in SS where you have to get 15 tears

You have to get 15 orbs, if you step into waking water or a spirit’s light or take too long to get one of the orbs, the guardians will be after you

The guardians are what make this space dangerous. If they catch you, no matter how insignificant the gash was, you will die

You can get these guardians off of you when you get the next tear, but until you get all of them and retreat back to where you started, you are at the mercy of the guardians

Survival Rate: 73%

Wild

Picture this, you just woke up in this weird place so naturally, you ask someone where you are.

“This is Faron woods, are you a traveler?”

“…sure…?”

“Great! I can’t really leave this stable with my condition, so could you do me a favor and give this to my wife?” The old man asked

“…what?”

“She lives over in Hateno, up passed the Dueling Peaks!” He shoves a note in your hands

“Sir I-“

“Thank you so much! Here’s your pay for your kindness!” Upon inspecting what he had given you, you see that this is a bare diamond

You were bringing this man’s wife this letter.

Survival Rate: 85%

Evermean forest, good old homicidal trees, need I say more?

Survival Rate: 95%

Wind

Imagine chilling on a boat with your grandpa but your grandpa is the boat.

Yes, the waters are expansive, you haven’t seen an island in days if at all, but this boat is keeping you company, telling jokes, soothing your nerves

Maybe you should be freaking out that this boat is talking, but his voice is nice so what can you say?

You start to joke around, singing dumb sea shanties, he chuckles with your antics, but keeps moving forward.

The sea is vast, but at least you’re not alone

Survival Rate: 98%

Imagine this: You’ve just been dropped in this random place. Now you’re on a random raft in the middle of the sea

Suddenly, the wind isn’t strong enough to push you forward and you’re on top of a tidal wave

Your raft finally gets back on steady water, but now there’s a shadow looming over you

You turn around and you can even comprehend how big it is

It’s probably the Kraken btw

Survival Rate: 0%

You’re cooked 100%

Hyrule

I’m realizing that a good bit of these rooms are in the woods, well, Rulie’s is no better🤷🏽‍♂️

Except these woods don’t have anything trying to actively murder you and eat you

These woods have things trying to help you

Little floating glowing grandmas if you will😌

As soon as you fell into these woods you smelled sugar and sweets, you were still very discombobulated from your fall and now you were suddenly in woods?

Soon enough, you’re swarmed by lights of different colors, they ask you if you’re alright, if you’re ok, what is someone like you doing here

Then they guide you out of the Fairy woods, whether that means that you end up in another room or go home is up to god

Survival Rate: 100%

Idea given to me by @tiercel13

A neverending cave slowly circling further and further down. The deeper you go the more it seems to close in, the air seems thicker, and the voices of people you almost recognize begin to echo off the walls, crying for help

This room, similar to Time’s “safe space” is mostly a “you’re going to go insane” rather than “that thing is gonna fucking kill you” :)

Survival Rate: depends how sane you were when you entered

Four

Imagine going on a wild goose chase for coins kinstones in a field with all the pieces hidden in tall grass

Survival Rate: 100% but it’s hell

This is gonna make some people mad but let me cook rq

You guys know Poppy Playtime? The Smiling Critters that chase you? That one clip from the Hour of Joy when they were eating that one guy alive?

That, but Minish :)

Survival Rate: 0%

As you traverse these woods, you realize that there are no animals in the wake. No rabbits, no mice, not even a wolf.

But this forest is littered with the bones of those lost animals.

So basically for backstory, minish got overpopulated and that meant they ate meat religiously. It was enough to feed, but soon enough, they ran out of food and now they’re hungry again

There is no survival here

There are too many Minish and you are locked in their woods

You can here their chittering and chatting, but if they spot you, you’ll only know by the dead silence of the forest

You can try breaking the bones you find on your path, opening the middle so they can smell the marrow rather than your flesh

But you only have little time and some bones are thick

And- wait…who’s bones are these? These are Hylain bones-

Legend

There are so many choices with Legend…

For his safe room, you’re just chilling on the walls. Not in the walls, on them. Your image is planted on the wall. You can move freely, you’re just glued to the wall, 2D

You’ll probably use this to scare the weird people who live around the house who’s walls you currently inhabit.

Survival Rate: 99.9% (Someone played too much and the family who lived there destroyed the house)

You guys no the movie Us? It’s basically that

There are different versions of you running around and they kinda really want you dead-

Survival Rate: 65%

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jtl-fics · 1 year

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Fluent Freshman - Part 19

There’s a couple things about FF that might be good to know at this point.

1. There are few things in the world he hates doing more than asking for clarification or admitting he doesn’t understand / know something. The thought of going up to someone and admitting that he hasn’t perfectly comprehended the situation upon the first explanation is something makes his stomach twist like he’d just eaten Mango-Habanero ice cream.

He has figured out his own math theorems in the pursuit of not having to ask the math teacher to explain he doesn’t understand. He got lost in an Ikea once for over 6 grueling hours where he considered making a home there and living among the display rooms until his grandma grabbed him by the ear and dragged him to safety (the food court) and let him regain his strength (eat Swedish meatballs). He, to this day, is not sure about one of his foreign language friend’s names (how embarrassing he just keeps waiting for someone else to say it but they go by some insane nickname).

So he has become a master of piecing shit together on his own. He sometimes gets it wrong (Andrew, god how embarrassing) but for the most part 8 times out of 10 he can get to the right answer if he just has a couple pieces to work with. No one had ever actually explained to him how Exy works and he was too embarrassed to ask after the third week of practice in middle school so he just pieced together what he was and was not allowed to do through the art of trial and error. He’s even mostly pieced out the rules for the other positions.

So with the information he has gotten through people being bound and determined to talk in foreign languages in front of him he has an idea about the tenuous situation some of the older Foxes find themselves in.

He’s heard Kevin Day and Jean Moreau talk in French.

He’s heard that the anxiety in both of their voices as they talked about their futures and owing 80% of their salaries to the ‘Moriyamas’ and how nervous they were about getting on professional teams or else they’d be killed.

Captain Neil and Andrew are not always using Russian to talk dirty.

He’s heard Andrew soothe Captain Neil’s worries about playing for a professional team. He’s heard Captain Neil mention that at least ‘Ichirou’ would likely just kill him and not make a game out of it like his father did.

Organized Crime might have more to do with Exy than FF had originally thought.

(He had thought it. Plenty of times he had thought it but his Gran had warned him that he was overthinking things. That he wasn’t playing a sport invented by the Mafia. That he had caffeinated coffee instead of decaf. “It’s going to be okay sweetie. Just take a deep breath.”)

This leads into the second thing you should know at this point.

2. Before he had signed with Wymack he had known the broad strokes of Captain Neil’s life. There had been a lot of news articles about it and Gran (bless her) loved trashy gossip magazines.

After he had signed with the Foxes he had done a bit of a deep dive on as many of their controversies as he could find. There’d been things from brawls on the court (worrying), player overdoses (concerning), a straight up MURDER (Oh god), and the very public breaking of the King of Exy’s arm resulting in his suicide (Warranted, that wacko was going to take off Captain Neil’s HEAD.)

But the thing that had made him actually a little bit, dare he admit, excited to go to Palmetto was the fact that Captain Neil was there.

For someone who froze for almost a decade, who just took it and didn’t have the balls to even react? Neil Josten is an inspiration.

This is someone who got away, who lived a life completely unlike FF’s, someone who knew how to run and more impressively someone who learned how to FIGHT. Captain Neil was being hunted but he still ripped people to shreds in interviews. Captain Neil was probably more scared of the Butcher than FF had been of anything in his entire life but Captain Neil was way braver than FF could ever hope to be.

Captain Neil was taken and tortured but he still fought. FF had seen the scars and Captain Neil is right to wear them proudly (though based on some conversations he has unfortunately overheard he is sure Andrew may have a role in Neil’s positive feelings about them).

FF had thought that he was being lead to his death down in a basement of a club (Don’t cringe. Don’t cringe. Don’t cringe. Don’t-) and he just trailed right behind the two of them without even an illusion of a fight.

Neil Abram Josten was a bit of a personal hero.

He’s proud to call him Captain Neil. He wishes Andrew hadn’t been there when Greg had mentioned wanting autographs because FF wants an autograph from Captain Neil but now Andrew has probably mentioned it to Neil.

Long story short, FF had looked into a lot of details on Captain Neil’s case.

Including two of the Butcher’s top men who were still on the loose.

Romero Malcolm and Jackson Plank.

He keeps his presence low but no matter how many times he blinks the man grumbling in Italian next to him continues to be Romero Malcolm.

Moreover Romero Malcolm continues to grumble about the fact that he is having a hard time finding ‘Nathaniel’ and that he’ll have to grab one of ‘The Wesninski brat’s friends’ to draw him out.

FF is a recently confirmed friend of Captain Neil.

FF who is standing next to this man, with his dick out, and trying to remain as invisible as possible.

After two shakes (Yes he was watching but only because he had to! He wonders briefly if he goes to the FBI if they would accept a description of Romero Malcolm’s penis for the wanted poster? Probably not but it is BURNED into his retinas.)

He watches as Romero tucks, zips, and then bypasses the sink entirely.

FF shivers at how unhygienic that is. Who RAISED him?

The door shuts and FF needs to get out of here ASAP but his hands are shaking with the sudden adrenaline of ’One of the FBI’s Most Wanted just took a piss next to me and is looking for me friend’. He pulls his phone from his pocket and ducks into one of the stalls. Even if there’s no door it’ll at least FEEL a little safer, a little more private. He needs to warn Neil, Warn Andrew, and warn-

The door to the bathroom SLAMS open and music blares in (palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy-) and his phone slips out of his hands and into the toilet. There are footsteps coming towards him and FF digs deep.

He’s in ultra stealth mode. He is the wall behind the wallpaper. Mantis shrimp can only dream of the color he becomes, the United States military have the CIA on the look out for him because he’s fallen off all conventional forms of radar and tracking.

He is a bargain fruit platter on a dessert table at a kid’s birthday party.

He is ULTRA stealth.

Romero’s gaze glides over him.

Then the man leaves (STILL DID NOT WASH HIS HANDS).

His heart is hammering in his chest but he manages to reach down and grab his phone. Well, Coach Wymack had gotten the extended warranty at least. (“Do you know what these fuckers do to phones? Josten crushed his last year in a fight with the Baseball team captain.”)

His phone’s extended dip into the toilet water had not done it any favors in working properly.

Well fuck.

He wipes his phone down the best he can. He wipes his phone down with some toilet paper before cramming it into his pocket (Sorry Nicky, he’ll wash the toilet water pants if they survive).

He sees a flyer on the wall of the bathroom and starts to think of a plan.

He rushes out of the bathroom (he still washes his hands because he will not have something in common with a man on the FBI’s most wanted list and he just dipped his hand into a CLUB TOILET) and clocks Nicky’s wild arm movements and WORSE clocks Romero just 10 clubbers away.

He sees Romero’s eyes lock onto Nicky and a smile that terrifies him.

He’s out of Ultra Stealth Mode even if every atom in his body wants to run.

He is so stressed and panicked that he has gone beyond his body’s ability to process that so all that is left is determination. He’s got a head full of a half-baked plan, a hand going to his pocket, a second hand on the only ‘weapon’ he has on him, and a stomach full of acid.

He’s pulling his phone out of his pocket before he can really let himself think about it and walking up next to where Romero is standing. He holds his toilet water phone up to his ear and does the one weird social anxiety thing that he had never done before.

He pretends to be on a phone call.

“Hey Captain Neil,” he says and in the corner of his eye he can see Romero’s gaze shift from Nicky (surrounded by an adoring public, covered in sweat and therefore difficult to grab - a difficult target) to himself (alone, shorter, and probably looking like he’s about to pass out). “Yeah I think I’m going to take a break outside after I grab quick drink and then a water at the bar.” He says because he has to be the easier target and he has to go to the bar. “Yeah, yeah, okay I’ll mention it to that bartender guy.” He says and pretends to hang up.

He turns and he walks towards the bar and feels his pulse in his throat go to the beat of the music (success is my only motherfucking option, failure’s not).

He only knows about the alley because in the car ride to Sweetie’s Nicky had mentioned that he wouldn’t let FF’s first time be out there. He had been embarrassed but it was the only way he knew to get Romero out of the club and away from where he could hurt Captain Neil or anyone else in the pursuit of that.

He spots the bartender who had gotten the drinks for their table and his mind completely blanks on the name but the bartender sees him and smiles. “Oh you’re Neil and Andrew’s new friend! What can I help you with? I thought you were-“

“Hi, yes I am Captain Neil and Andrew’s friend.” He says a little loudly because he can feel Romero behind him and he does NOT want the man to know anything about where Captain Neil was.

“Captain Neil? Oh wow that’s adorable.” The man gushes. “What can I help you with? I won’t ask for ID for one of their friends.” He winks.

“I’d like to order the uh…” he tries to remember the exact drink name from the flyer, “…the deluxe chocolate martini?” He asks and knows he got it right when the bartender’s expression shifts ever so slightly.

“Oh yeah, how do Andrew and Neil feel about that?” He asks and oh great a coded conversation. It’s nice to actually be having a real one of these for once instead of just perceiving normal conversations to have hidden meanings.

“They don’t know. They probably prefer that I order it instead of Nicky or Aaron.” He lets his eyes dart to the wide where he believes Romero is watching him.

“I don’t know if that’s true.” The bartender says, “Nicky knows how to handle a drink and Aaron’s not a lightweight either.” He adds.

FF struggles to find a coded way to say ‘It’s not that someone’s hitting on me too hard like the flyer mentioned. It’s that there’s a mafia hitman in your club.’

Finally after a moment, “It’s not the usual kind of drink they get.” He tries and the bartender looks confused by the statement, dammit. He struggles to find a different way to say it before the bartender smiles.

“Y’know you’re really cute.” He reaches under the bar top and grabs a piece of paper and a pen. “How about you write down your number for me cutie? We can meet up sometime.” He says. “I’ll get started on that chocolate martini for you.” He says.

HE COULD KISS THIS MAN.

“I’d like that.” He says.

He writes out a quick message on the small note paper.

‘Armed. After Neil. Looked at Nicky. I’m going to the back alley. Phone is dead.’

The bartender comes back and looks at his note. “We’re out of chocolate martini mix, can I get you something-“ He hopes the club lighting obscures how pale the man got, “something else?” He asks and FF can SEE his pulse.

“Can I just get some water then?” He asks.

The bartender nods and pulls up his phone and hopefully is dialing the police and hands FF a water. His hand grabs hold of FF’s “You don’t need to go out into the alley. You could hang in the backroom with me?” He offers.

There really are some kind people in the world.

“I think it’s better if I’m not in here for a bit.” He says back and honestly he needs this kindness and he has a spare bit of courage, “What’s your name by the way? Sorry I missed it.” He says.

The bartender swallows, “It’s Roland.” He says.

“Thanks Roland.” He twists the cap off of the water bottle and takes a sip.

He turns and pretends not to notice how Romero is trying to be inconspicuous pretending to be on his phone.

He makes his way over to the alley door and notices that Romero is tracking his movements but is not following him like he did to the bar.

His heart is pounding and he can’t BELIEVE he’s doing this. He wants to run, wants to hide somewhere, wants to become imperceptible but…but…

He opens the door to the alley as the bass of the remixed song finishes.

(You can do anything you set your mind to, man)

He lets the door slam behind him and he is alone in the alley.

He was not expecting a van to come to a screeching halt in front of the entrance and for a different face to appear climbing out of the car.

Jackson Plank.

FF looks at the ugly smile on the man as he walks towards him with a knife in hand.

Okay now what genius?

MASTERPOST FOR ALL PARTS OF FLUENT FRESHMAN AU

5/26/23: EDITED. Can’t believe I forgot to put the Captain in front of Neil’s name on the meme. I’m blaming the accidental early awakening.

Per your requests:

@i-have-three-feelings @blep-23 @dreamerking27 @andreilsmyreligion @belodensetdust @rainbowpineapplebottle @yarn-ace @iwouldlikesometea @lily-s-world @obscureshipsandchips @booklover242 @whataboutmyfries @sahturnos @pluto-pepsi @dreamerthinker @passinhosdetartaruga @leftunknownheart @aro-manita-muscaria @hologramsaredead @Chaoticgremlinswishtheycouldbeme @tntwme @tayspots @nick-scar @crazy-fangirl2524 @blue-jos10 @stabbyfoxandrew @splishsplashyouropinionistrash @sammichly @the-broken-pen @bitchesdoweknowu @very-small-flower @ghostlyboiii @its-a-paxycab @bisexual-genderfluid-fan @cheesecookie @theoneandonlylostsock @foxsoulcourt @blueleys @adverbialstarlight @elia-nna @can-i-just-stay-in-the-corner @nikodiangel @foxandcrow-inatrenchcoat @hallucinatedjosten @satanic-foxhole-court @vexingcosmos @chalilodimun @insectsgetcooked @angry-kid-with-no-money @queer-crows @lillyndra @themugglemudperson @readertodeath @apileofpillows @mortalsbowbeforeme @hellomynameismoo @next-level-mess @youreonlylow @interstellarfig @notprocrastinatingatalltoday @percyjacksonfan3 @queenofcrazy27 @bsmr261 @ghostlyscares @spencellio @adinthedarkroom @harpymoth @sufferingjustalilbit @anxietymoss @oddgreyhound @ohno-myhyperfixation-itsbroken @ken22789 @atiredvampire @isoldescorner @not--a--pipedream @azure-wing @bushbees @roonilwazlib-main @crumplelush @foldedaces-paperbirds @thesenseinnonsense @let-tyrants-fear @ketchupfriesandallthingsnice @legowerewolf @deadlydodos @but-we-respect-his-craft @cariniqe @zanypersonapricotbiscuit

The requests to be added to the tag list keep being spread out across a few different areas. If I missed you please just ask again in the replies I promise I just missed you.

As stated before if you’re up here and I spelled it right but you didn’t get a notification there might be something switched around in your settings that won’t let me tag you properly?

Lillyndra it worked this time!!!

#Fluent Freshman AU #Is it a songfic chapter if it's only 3 lines? Experts aren't sure #Did I listen to lose yourself a lot while writing this chapter? Perhaps #If Nora mentioned something about Jackson or Romero in her extras I did not read it #Also gonna be honest here and state that I forgot the likely year that AFTG happened in and this is happening in 2010 #So I guess this AU also involves a slight time shift #Andrew and Neil may have gotten lost in one another's eyes a bit down in the speakeasy #Really they're just being polite to get all of their PDA out of the way while FF is taking what might be the piss of a lifetime.#(They have no idea how accurate that might be)#Andrew is all set to kiss one of his favorite of Neil's freckles (yes he has ordered them from favorite to lesser favorite)#Then his phone goes off #He looks and it's Roland #Andrew: WTF is Roland trying to call me?#Nicky is busy being the Dancing Queen. If someone plays ABBA he will absolutely scream rn #I had considered a whole sequence of FF trying to get Nicky and Aaron to the safety of the backroom in Eden's #And Nicky just keeps reappearing on the dancefloor while FF is looking for Aaron #I was gonna use that simpsons meme where Moe throws out Barney and then Barney is just right back in the bar #But it got a little too crazy #But just know in this AU Nicky is canonically an excellent escape artist #Maybe Erik went through a bit of a magician phase and Nicky was DELIGHTED to be asked to be his assistant #Maybe that's how they got together #The inherent ROMANCE of magician and assistant #I don't remember if they ever really said in the books or nora's content #If I'm rambling because I forgot to shut off my alarm (Memorial Day 4-day weekend baby)#The fate of FF's phone may have been caused by some slight anger towards my own #RIP FF's Wymack phone (July 2010 - November 2010)#AFTG #AFTG AU #Andreil #FF - Pt.19

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