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jae-daddy · 4 years ago

Text

Duff (4)

jaebum au series

one / two / three / four / five / six / seven / eight masterlist

pairing: im jaebum x reader genre: angst, smut, cheating, CEO! i guess too now plot: you are the duff, and guys use you to get close to your bestfriend, turns out jaebum was no exception. but as time goes on the tension between you and your bestfriend’s unoffical boyfriend grows a/n: it so late, I'm literally seeing double rn... hope y’all like it! <3 not edited.

Life is brimming with lessons that teach you how to live without being naive and a fool.

You were already taught a few lessons by life, as it made you jump through endless hoops burning with malicious flames waiting to scorch your skin at slightest touch.

So you found it fair to hold yourself as intelligent and mature.

Therefore, you trusted your conclusion to ignore whatever happened in the elevator with Im Jaebum.

What was said, what was done; none of it mattered.

An important lesson you’ve learnt is people say and do crazy things when they are riding high a shot of adrenaline.

Jaebum’s near-death experience led him to say things that he would not on a normal day. It was only because he was scared that he did. And everyone wants to die an honest man. You were certain if it were Paul in the elevator instead of you, Jaebum might have confessed something outrageous to him too.

So that was not the reason why you were staring at the two males in front of you as they spoke absolute nonsense to you. You already knew not to take what happened in that tiny metal box seriously. Instead, it was another life lesson you knew that made you stare at them as if they had grown two heads: everything has a price.

“Not everyone gets an opportunity like this, y/n,” Paul spoke, a second away from begging on his knees.

You shook your head in distaste, this was not part of the plan. Actually, there was no plan, but if you had one, this would definitely not be it. This was not how you imagined your lottery internship to turn out.

“Paul, I am flattered the company believes me to be capable of such an important role,” you breathed, trying to keep a polite smile as your eyes bounced between the bald man and the smirking jerk. “However, I do not think I would be suitable for this role. I made it clear in my internship contract that I will not have my studies affected by this opportunity. Unfortunately, being the secretary of the -”

“I’m sorry to stop you, y/n,” Paul cut you off, not apologetic at all. You bit your cheeks to hold back a sneer. “We have thought about this through, and believe it to be the best plan of action to take right now. Mr Im is new to this company and is temporary, and while we have made a public announcement, he is still on trial.

“We could get someone in a fixed-term confidential contract, but that’s too complicated.”

Your brows furrowed as you disagreed with that, but you didn't say anything.

“The remaining time left in your contract and Mr Im’s trial period match up perfectly. You already have secretarially role in the company, so you already know the ups and downs, the tricks and tips, so we really believe this is the best way. And about your studies, the summer break began last week. However, if you believe this to be in violation of your contract, we will compensate.”

“Compensate?” You rose an eyebrow, payment would be better than slaving away for free.

“Pay you, just like any other employee,” Paul smiled happily. Finally seeing some indication of interest from your side. He added, proudly, “with all employee benefits.”

You bit your lip in deep thought.

You mentally weighed the pros and cons.

There were pros, so many pros; a better resume, money, free coffee and healthcare, etc. But the con, the big con stared at you in bold, italics, highlighted in large red fonts: you’d be working for Im Jaebum.

If this was someone else you would have said yes the moment they offered it, even without the benefits. But with Im Jaebum, things got complicated.

You weren’t sure if he could maintain the professional relationship between the two of you. And if you were being completely honest, you didn’t know if you could maintain it too.

Even now, with Paul standing at one end of the table, and Jaebum settled on the long side. Your mind couldn’t help thinking about how short your skirt was, and how easy it would be for Jaebum to bend you over the wooden table, and make you a moaning mess.

It would be quite difficult to maintain professionalism when you’d be spending time alone with him. Or maybe, he would use his position to make you suffer. He might end up not coming to work at all, have you do all his work, and just show up to sign and show his face.

So much could go wrong with working for Im Jaebum.

And you also had to consider the fact that you hadn’t talked to him since the elevator incident.

You haven’t been to Heather’s place, too busy with the piled up assignments all due within the last two weeks. The twenty hours of weekly internship didn’t give you any freed up time either. You didn’t get an opportunity to see Heather, or her boyfriend, Im Jaebum, to have a talk.

“Oh come on, y/n,” Jaebum smiled at you, making your blood boil instantly. This was the first thing he said to you in the past two weeks and somehow managed to be an arrogant shit-eater when he did. Your glare didn’t make his smile falter as he sang, “It’ll be fun.”

No way. You thought. There is no way you would be able to work for that self-centred, cocky, incredibly hot jerk.

“We’ll cover your fees.” Paul stopped you before the no on the tip of your tongue tumbled out. You stared at him in shock, as he looked at you expectedly.

“My university fees?” You asked, shocked.

“Yes, all of it.” He nodded.

That’s a lot.

Your eyes fell on Jaebum who smirked at you as if he had the whole entire world at his feet's disposal, and maybe he truly did. He had something similar to that power if the company was willing to go to such extents to make him stay.

The pros were really starting to outweigh the annoying, irritating con.

“Fine,” you licked your lips, with a sigh. “I’m in.”

Paul almost jumped in his place with excitement, “Thank you, y/n! Thank you so much!”

Paul walked out swiftly muttering something about going to the HR and having a contract formed immediately. Your eyes followed him as he left, remaining on the doors that closed behind him.

You could feel his gaze burning the side of your face, and it truly felt as if you were about to combust.

“What?” You snarked, turning towards him annoyed.

Jaebum just snickered as he swirled side to side, carefree, on his chair, “Why are you always so mad, love?”

You rolled your eyes getting up, “I guess this meeting is over.”

“I didn’t dismiss you, y/n,” Jaebum said, stopping his playful actions.

“You’re not my boss until I sign that piece of paper, so,” you gave him a middle finger with a tight smile before walking out the office.

You could hear his light laughter follow you, but you ignored it.

You stopped in your tracks as you remembered something and entered the room once again. Jaebum looked up at you, surprised, before smiling brightly, “Welcome back.”

You cursed yourself for returning after such an amazing exit, but there were more pressing matters than your pride.

“Have you told Heather about what happened?” You closed the door behind you, making sure no one could hear you.

Jaebum’s eyes danced with amusement, as he shrugged, drawling, “What happened?”

“In the elevator, Jaebum,” you gritted through your teeth as you stepped closer towards him.

Jaebum’s smiled only grew as he frowned with feigned innocence, “I can’t seem to remember, maybe if you could help me remember.”

His lazy gaze fell to your lips before meeting your eyes again. A spark ignited deep inside you, and you told yourself it was anger; it was an annoyance.

You clicked your jaw as you smacked your hands onto the desk, leaning over it. Jaebum watched you, carefully, not intimidated a bit, only amused.

Your eyes narrowed at him, before you smiled sweetly, “You were holding my hand and crying like a child.”

Jaebum hissed, unaffected, as he tsked, “I can’t seem to remember that.”

“Did you tell her or not?” You groaned, your annoyance at peak.

What you would do to this man if you got a chance. He wouldn’t be smiling like that, he’d be begging you for forgiveness, for release.

Jaebum smirked as if he could read your mind, “No, I didn't.”

“Good,” you nodded, gulping as his eyes watched you with unsettling darkness. “Don’t.”

He rose his eyebrow, before nodding, “As you wish, y/n.”

You turned and felt his gaze watch you as you walked out. You felt it lower, watching your hips as it swayed side to side. Your hand gripped the cool handle as your shoulders sagged slightly.

You let out a low sigh, “Thanks.”

You disappeared behind the door before Jaebum could reply.

“Babe!” Heather sang as her long limbs fell over you loosely. You laughed, as you helped her sit straight. She leaned against you again, snuggling her face into your neck as she hugged you, “I love the way you smell, baby!”

You chuckled as you patted her red matted hair soiled with glitter and sweat at the back of the Uber, “Thanks Heather, I like how you smell too.”

“Don’t lie,” you could hear her pout, and it only made you smile. “You always make fun of my feet.”

“But that’s only after the gym or a hike, Heather,” you told her, as you brushed the hair off her face.

Heather was completely wasted tonight.

She was already drunk by the time you walked into the club. Jaebum wasn’t anywhere to be found, and you found her with a group of her “friends” that you didn’t like.

They would always make her drink too much, give her a little white sugar, and let her waste her platinum card on those low lives.

You didn’t like the way the guys would touch her as she slumped back onto the couch unable to see straight. You didn’t like the way the girls sitting around would not help her, instead, encourage her to be worse.

You were mad when you were pulling her away from the crowd and towards the bathroom when you had found Jaebum. He had just got to the club himself but was ready to leave as soon as he saw the state Heather was in.

He sat on the other side of Heather, holding her purse, as Heather held you from the middle seat.

Heather mumbled something in return and you couldn’t understand it.

“By that red letterbox is fine,” you told the Uber driver as he slowed down.

Jaebum got out first, and you helped Heather onto his back before getting out. You turned to the driver, giving him a small smile, “Thank you.”

“No problem, have a good night,” he said, already accepting a new ride.

“You too,” you said, as you closed the door. You turned to Jaebum, with Heather hanging her head over his shoulder. Her long ember curls falling down his chest as he grunted and halted her up.

“Woah, stop,” Heather moaned, heaving.

Jaebum looked at you with terror in his eyes, and you laughed at him, “Come on, let’s get this party animal into bed.”

“Is this where you live?” Jaebum asked as you led him up the small walk to the door.

You snorted and shook your head, “No, this is Heather’s home.”

Jaebum rose his eyebrows, and you continued, as you unlocked the doors,

“Her parents don’t live in this house anymore, so Heather skips between here and the apartment.”

You turned the lights on and took in the home that greeted you.

“They love sure love red, huh?” Jaebum commented, taking in the red couch, red feature wall, and red details spread over the living room and kitchen.

You laughed at that, agreeing with him. The Blacks sure did take pride in their red-haired heritage, and didn’t hide the fact that it was family’s favourite colour, “Mrs Black was going through an interior design phase.”

“Thank god it was just a phase,” Jaebum snickered, making you turn to him with a pointed look as you tried to hide the smile.

“She wasn’t too bad,” you replied and began walking towards Heather’s room.

Jaebum followed behind you, grunting as he adjusted Heather on his back, “No, she was just too red.”

You rolled your eyes as you opened her bedroom door and walked towards the bed. You pulled down the covers and Jaebum gently set her down. You took off her shoes, and earrings carefully.

Jaebum didn’t say anything and just watched you as you walked around the room getting out her nightshirt, and face-cleansing products.

“Why are you looking at me, Jaebum?” You asked, not looking at him. Instead, you pumped out the cleanser on a pad and gently took off the makeup from her face.

“Is there a problem?” Jaebum asked back, making you snort.

You gently turned her face and began the other side, “Yes, it’s making me nervous. I can feel you judging me.”

He was probably thinking what everyone else seemed to think when they saw you and Heather. They never saw the whole you both had for each other, how you would do anything for one another. All they saw was Heather in all her brilliance, beauty and wealth, and you, as her second, her side-kick.

“I’m not judging you,” he replied instantly.

Something about the way he said it made you believe him. You bit your lip, as folded the dirty make-up pads and put them on the side table.

“Then what are you doing?” You took a wet towel, wiping her face. You patted it dry and misted some toner and moisturiser. You turned back and met Jaebum’s eyes that remained on you, “Why are you looking at me?”

“There’s nothing else to look at,” he simply shrugged.

You rolled your eyes and pointed to the wall covered with photos of Heather through the years. Most of them had you in them, celebrating every holiday, and some photos from random days when the sun was shining brightly.

Jaebum stared at the wall as if noticing it for the first time. He got up and slowly walked up towards it. He took in the photos for a while, a small chuckle leaving him sometimes, “How did you two become friends?”

You smiled at the memory, “She saved me.”

You stared at your gorgeous friend, as she got up slightly. She searched around, her eyes disappearing as she smiled spotting you, “Oh, you’re here, y/n. I was going to the store on Wednesday.”

She trailed off, falling back into her pillow dozing off again.

“Her hangover is going to kill her tomorrow,” you turned to Jaebum with a tight smile, as you held up the nightshirt, “I’m going to change her.”

Jaebum instantly turned on his heels and walked out, closing the doors behind him.

You walked out to the smell of coffee and Jaebum sitting at the kitchen counter with two mugs in front of him. You furrowed your eyebrows as you settled on the chair in front of him, “Is this poisoned?”

Jaebum snorted rolling his eyes.

You blew the coffee before sipping it. It was still searing hot, so you placed it down on the counter, and turned towards Jaebum.

You took in his midnight hair pushed back, revealing his forehead. You didn’t know you could find someone’s forehead so sexy, but after seeing his hair down while he was at work, you had to admit it was hot. His piercings that were normally missing during office hours had returned too, a few missing.

You frowned your eyes focusing on his nose and eyebrows, “Why aren’t you wearing all your piercings?”

“It’s a nuisance putting it on and off,” Jaebum shrugged, before pointing to his lips, his tongue coming out to flick the sliver hoop, “Just wore my favourite.”

You held your breath, as the image of the cool metal against your lips, flicked by your tongue, gently tugged by your teeth invaded your mind. Your cheeks heated but you continued like nothing was happening to your body.

“Do you have piercings anywhere else?”

Jaebum smirked, “If you’re into pierced nipples, I can get them done for you.”

You groaned, a ridiculous smile on your face as you shook your head, “Can you ever have a conversation without being a prick?”

“A prick?” he gasped, “that’s a bit harsh. I would say I’m more of a flirt.”

“Oh, so you know? This is a conscious decision. You wake up every day and decide to be the bane of my existence.”

“I do wake up every morning and think of you,” Jaebum smiled at you. He chuckled, seeing you roll your eyes at him.

“You’re ridiculous,” you snorted. Jaebum simply shrugged, smiling.

Something beeped from the kitchen and Jaebum got up. You watched him walk over to the stove and turn it off. He reached for a mug before looking through the drawers for something.

You narrowed your eyes watching him, “What are you looking for?”

“Uh... a strainer?” He turned back to you, scratching the back his head. “I don’t know what it’s called.”

Your heart melted at how adorable he looked standing there, confused and unsure. The smile on his lips was so beautiful as he watched you, waiting for you.

“The second drawer over there,” you pointed, not looking at him as your cheeks tinted rosy again.

Jaebum murmured thanks, before using it to drain the liquid from the pot and into the cup, “It’s a hangover tea. My mum makes it for me every time I get too drunk.”

“You live with your mum?” You asked. Jaebum peered back at you a small smile on his lips.

“Yeah, but I rarely ever get to see her.”

“Why’s that?” You frowned. The way Jaebum talked about her, the lightness in his voice and the softness of his smile, told you how much he adored his mother.

Jaebum shrugged before giving you a cheeky smile, “My house is too big.”

You laughed at that. You were not expecting that at all. You heard Jaebum’s low chuckle as you sobered up.

“What about you?” He asked as placed the cup onto a tray with a glass of water and two tablets he found next to the refrigerator. “Do you live alone?”

“Yup,” you nodded, before frowning, “Not even a pet.”

“No pets?” He asked, sympathetic.

You nodded, “I’m scared of animals. It doesn’t matter what size, or how well-trained, or what the animal is. I am terrified of them all the same.”

Jaebum gasped as if you had confessed to a murder, “What is wrong with you?”

“Wow, I thought this was a safe place,” you mumbled before taking a sip from your coffee that had cooled down. You hummed at the taste, he made good coffee.

“What about your parents?” Jaebum asked, making you stiffen. “Where do they live?”

You remained quiet.

You opened your mouth to tell him what you always told anyone who asks. It wasn’t that you were embarrassed or thought it was something to hide. You didn’t want people in your business and telling them to mind their business when they asked only piked up their interest more.

So you opened your mouth to tell him what you’ve been telling everyone for the past five years, “I don’t live with them.”

Normally you would follow up with something about living here was better for your education or future jobs. You would say something, an excuse, that was reason enough for many young people to move out of their parents home. But what you said surprised you, “I don’t talk to them anymore.”

“Oh,” was all Jaebum said. “That’s cool too.”

You peered up at him with a frown. You took in his relaxed gaze, the smile on his face just like it there was a minute ago. There was no sympathy, no pity. There was no spike in interest or anything.

He really didn’t want to pry. He didn't want to know why unless you told him. He only took as much as you could allow him.

Suddenly there was an iridescent pond shimmering in your chest. It swirled, making your whole body feel alive as you took in Im Jaebum. It felt as if your entire body was one cell, one tiny speck of dust caught in the breeze of Im Jaebum, and it didn’t mind.

You gulped, your body and mind acting quicker than you could control, “They couldn’t stand the sight of at me after they found out I was still doing something I promised I wouldn’t do anymore.”

The faces of your parents appeared in front of your eyes. The shock, anger, the disappointment on their face as they found you lying in a pool of your urine and vomit. The horror in their eyes, their desperateness as they shook your body, pleading for you to reply.

“They didn't kick me out. I left,” you ran a hand through your hair, as you let out a heavy sigh. You thought of the letter you wrote them, the way they had cried when they came to the hospital to meet you during those months, “I couldn’t hurt them anymore.”

“Do you think you would ever go meet them again?” You looked up to Jaebum watching you. You were thankful for the lack of pity in his eyes as he kept his gaze on you.

You sighed again, and it came out as a little laugh, “One day I will.”

You nodded, as you met his eyes. He smiled at you softly, and you smiled back as you scrunched your nose to stop the tears from threatening you, “When I am good enough, I will.”

“I hope that day comes soon.”

You didn’t realise Jaebum had come this close to you as you were talking. He leaned against the counter between you, his eyes intently taking you in. He folded his hands on the dark marble, his face leaning half-way over the counter.

You watched him back.

He was so beautiful.

You huffed out a smile as you shook your head at him. Jaebum instantly changed, leaning back, the playfulness in his eyes glinting once again as he rose an eyebrow in question.

“You’re not too bad, you know?” You smiled at him, before adding, “When you’re acting like a normal human being at least.”

Jaebum laughed at that before giving you a mocking smirk, “You’re not too bad yourself, y/n.”

You grinned about to say thank you, when he added, “When you’re not acting like a stick is stuck up your ass at least.”

“What an asshole,” you shook your head, laughing at him.

Jaebum beamed back, his eyes shining, “What a bitch.”

You took in the dark flecks in his eyes. You noticed their velvety blackness absorbing all light around it, but something else existed in those captivating eyes of his eyes. They didn’t get dragged away into the twilight of his gaze.

Instead, it shone brightly. It glistened, it was golden, white and sparkled like a starry night. It dragged you in, it made you want to lean close to him.

It made you want to place your lips on his and see how that shimmering halo swirled as he pulled you in closer. It made you want to reach for him, to place your hand on his soft cheeks. It made you want to walk around the counter and hug him in the middle of the kitchen littered with red embellishments.

Jaebum’s smile curled into an easy smirk as he winked at you before turning around. He picked up the tray with a cup of tea, a glass of water and Panadol, as walked towards the door the red-haired beauty was sleeping in.

Everything had a price.

Somewhere deep within your heart was a corner buried so deeply in the darkness you had forgotten it existed. The room was cold, dark, and there was nothing. Nothing except for a lone candle standing in the middle of the emptiness.

There had been nothing there for an eternity, and it was almost like magic. It almost felt like a trick of the eye, but then it happened again.

A flame, a spark, flickering at the tip of the candle; it sparked again.

This time it caught on. It burned, slowly getting brighter and livelier.

You watched Jaebum disappear behind the door of Heather’s room.

A sharp ache twisted your heart as you saw his broad back enter the dark room she was sleeping in.

The flame spreading over the wick twisted in shades of ember, their shadows dancing over the room.

You saw a word, you saw a face.

You knew the price for this feeling tugging, craving to grow bigger in your heart. You walked into the room, hidden in a deep corner of your heart. The ivory trail of your dress dragged on the dusty floor, turning brown with every step.

You didn’t look at the walls, you didn’t take in the shapes of the flames.

You took sharp, clear steps. You reached the candle, the flame reflecting softly against you. You closed your eyes, took in a deep breath and exhaled, blowing out the candle.

The flame was gone.

The candle extinguished, the room engulfed in darkness, once again.

You looked to the wall, the photo was no longer there but the image there was burnt into your mind.

The price of this feeling was too expensive.

It was too precious, and you couldn’t afford it.

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gryffindordaughterofathena · 3 years ago

Note

Hi fellow Gryffindor! Hope you're read for:

Not Yet Wed Questions

Note: Great Scott! This week, we are going back in time to MC’s intern year. Think of Ethan’s relationship with them at this point and answer the following questions accordingly. It is entirely up to you when in year 1 this takes place (pre/post Miami, pre/post CH 15, etc). Feel free to answer with dialogue or pictures or both :) Have fun!

No worries. All of this is off the record and HR will never know!

The setting for this answers is:

For Both

When I first saw them, I thought__________

What is your coworker's most used swear word?

Quick: What color are their eyes?

Three people at work your coworker hates?

What is your coworker’s strangest or most endearing quirk?

If they had a crush on anyone at work, who would that be?

(Bonus round! Feel free to skip.)

Never have I Ever:

come into work hungover

had a fistfight

been kicked out of a bar

gotten a tattoo

broken someone’s heart

been in love

For MC (Ethan is not there)

Where do you see him in five years (both professionally and in his personal life?)

What do you find the most impressive about him?

Last thing he texted you?

If he asked you out on a date, what would you say?

For Ethan (MC is not there)

Where do you see him in five years (both professionally and in his personal life?)

What specifically do you find attractive about her?

Last thing she texted you?

If she asked you out on a date, how would you respond?

Ahh my favorite time of the week again. Also on a side note these questions are brilliant.

I am sorry for being late, my school thinks it's okay to torture seventeen year olds, smh

(Ignore if there are any typos, I am sleep deprived)

Previous Interviews

The setting for these answers is: Two days before they leave for Miami. Diana already knows about Naveen and as an extra context, they now spend time together at his apartment or at Derry Roasters to discuss Naveen's case and both of them (grudgingly in Ethan's case) call each other ahem...."friends"

-----------------

[Two people make their way towards the busy little coffee shop down the street from the hospital, the man furtively looking over his shoulder, as if scared of being spotted, the woman, sensing her companion's distress, puts a tentative hand on his arm, which visibly seems to calm him somewhat. He sends a grateful smile her way.]

ETHAN : We are both busy doctors rookie, why are we supposed to do this—interview?

DIANA : It won't take long, plus we are already waiting for the test results for Doct- umm our patient.

ETHAN : Well if it will stop you from talking my ear off.

DIANA : (Says nothing just smiles)

(FOR BOTH)

When I first saw them, I thought ________

Diana : Actually the first time we met it was kinda in the midst of an emergency, so I didn't get much time to form an impression but once he left I thought he was a (glances towards Ethan, then says in a rush) handsome asshole.

Ethan : Excuse me, what?

Diana : Well after I helped save the woman you told me that it was incredible I didn't kill her, forgive me if I can't think that you were an asshole.

Ethan : (a little flustered) That's not what I said excuse me fo- never mind, I thought she wasn't completely incompetent for an intern and also that she's quite bold.

Di : "Bold" ?

E : Yes, you tried to flirt with me.

Di : Oh that was before I knew who you were.

What is your coworker's most used swear word?

Ethan : She alternates between Shit and Fuck

Diana : Goddamnit and Fuck

Quick: What color are their eyes?

Diana : Blue, a bright clear blue.... umm it's quite noticeable when someone chews you out every other day.

Ethan : Dark brown that appears almost black at times.

Diana : (mutters)I am surprised he can see my eyes from his giraffe height

Ethan : glares at her

Diana : What? Oh did I say that out loud? Umm well it's true (shrugs)

Three people at work your coworker hates?

Diana : (giggling) I think it's easier to tell you about three people he doesn't hate, he hates everyone except Dr. Banerjee, Dr. Emery both of whom he respects and well me.

Ethan : (a rare smile playing in his lips) who said anything about not hating you Rookie?

Diana : Because you are my partner in crime and I think we are friends.

Ethan : "partner in crime"?

Diana : Yes we go to burning buildings together and anyways deny as much as you want, you don't hate me.

Ethan : (softly) I don't. (composing himself) In case of Dr. Ramirez, I don't think she can ever hate anyone, she herself says "I love everyone" I don't know how that's possible but she doesn't hate anyone at this place.

What is your coworker’s strangest or most endearing quirk?

Diana : Definitely pinching the bridge of his nose thing, I once tried counting how many times he did it while morning rounds, it was exactly 17 times in two hours.

Ethan : Not my fault most interns are utterly hopeless. In Diana's case it's forgetting a hair tie every day and using a pen or a pencil to keep her hair up.

Di : This irritates him so much that he keeps a spare tie in his office now.

Ethan : I don't know why I put up with these habits (pinches the bridge of his nose)

If they had a crush on anyone at work, who would that be?

Diana : (in an uncanny imitation of Ethan's gruff voice) It's beyond me to have juvenile emotions such as a crush, it's mostly a result of continued exposure to the person for a long time anyways.

Ethan : What- I don't sound like that

Diana : You do!

Ethan : For her it might be one of her friends, they seem quite enamored by her.

Di : My friends....nah! It's someone else

E : Who else do you spend time with to have a crush on?

Di : A girl's gotta have some secrets. (muttering so softly that Ethan doesn't hear it) how much more oblivious can a man be?

(NEVER HAVE I EVER ROUND)

Ethan : What is that?

Di : You drink if you have done said thing before, it's a classic drinking game.

E : I am not playing any such game.

Di : Come on we are already doing this.

E : *Grumbles in agreement*

come into work hungover

The iced coffee lies untouched before both of them.

Diana : We are responsible doctors.

had a fistfight

Both take a sip of their respective beverages.

Diana : Okay I'll go first, I once punched a guy in seventh grade because he was being obnoxious and then his other friends taunted him on being punched by a girl which hurt his male ego and he tried to fight back but some of our teachers spotted me dodging it and I escaped punishment because of my pristine record.

Ethan : Well, in our field there are many power hungry morons who deserve being punched.

been kicked out of a bar

Ethan takes another sip, Diana doesn't.

Diana : Okay dish

E : We all do regrettable things in our youth.

Di : Really, you won't tell us?

E : (grins) I am going for an air of mystery.

Di : Well it's working

(Both smile at each other, forgetting their surroundings for some time)

gotten a tattoo.

None of them drink.

Di : It hurts like hell so I am never getting one.

broken someone’s heart.

Di : Nah! I haven't. But Ethan you drink this time.

Ethan : Why?

Di : Honestly have you ever seen the way the nurses look at you?

Ethan : If you say so (takes a sip)

been in love

Ethan : Doesn't drink but all of a sudden he fixes his gaze at her almost involuntarily.

Di : (Drinks) I like to think I have been in love before.

Ethan : (trying to look as uninterested as possible) What changed?

Di : Well we broke up after around two yearsof dating.

Ethan : (doesn't say anything but looks visibly less tense)

Di : Oh we are out of coffee...

E : You sit here I'll place our orders.

Di : Thanks

(DIANA)

Where do you see him in five years (both professionally and in his personal life?)

Di : Professionally he'll most definitely contribute even more to the medical world, lead the Diagnostic Team like the best doctor he is. Personally, I dunno maybe he'll find someone, I hope he does, he needs someone to help and support him through his problem of shouldering every little thing.

What do you find the most impressive about him?

Diana : His passion for medicine obviously, you should see when he talks about medicine, it's so evident how much he loves what he does and also how much he cares despite the gruff exterior he puts on in front of everyone.

Last thing he texted you?

Diana : He hates texting, so I think his last text was, let me see (scrolls through her phone)

"We need to put ciprofloxacin in our list, can you do me a favor by adding it?"

It's uh about a case.

If he asked you out on a date, what would you say?

Diana : It's never going to happen, he's Ethan Ramsey and I am, well me, but if uh hypothetically he asked me out, I'd say yes immediately, hypothetically obviously.

(Ethan returns with the coffee, then looks at Di's flustered face)

Ethan : What were you talking about?

Diana : Uh nothing I was just - (her pager goes off) We have the test results, I'll go and bring those back in a few minutes.

(ETHAN)

Where do you see her in five years (both professionally and in his personal life?)

Ethan : She'll be an amazing doctor obviously, maybe even with a spot on the diagnostic team. I suppose she won't hear this?

Interviewer : No, she won't.

Ethan : Personally, with someone who values her contribution to our sphere of work, I suppose.

What specifically do you find attractive about her?

Ethan : I really shouldn't be talking about this.

Interviewer : Don't worry, no one's hearing about this, it's just some extra information so that we know you better.

Ethan : She's an attractive woman obviously, but I think her smile, it's difficult to ignore and her eyes.

Last thing she texted you?

Ethan : "I AM DONE WITH MY PATIENTS🤩🥳"

"IT'S LIKE EVERYONE DECIDED TO BE SICK TODAY"

followed by a series of emoticons

"😣😖😫😩"

If she asked you out on a date, how would you respond?

Ethan : I would have to turn her down, I am her boss.

(gazing wistfully at the street, eyes glued at Diana's approaching figure)

But perhaps in a different life I would have said yes.

Ethan : I think that's enough questions, she's here now and we have important matters at hand which require our attention.

-------------------

Taglist : @genevievemd @jamespotterthefirst @drariellevalentine @rookie-ramsey @aleynareads @miss-smrxtiee @terrm9 @aestheticartsx @fireycookie @maurine07 @starrystarrytrouble @schnitzelbutterfingers @tsrookie @anntoldstories @iemcpbchoices @stygianflood @sophxwithers @actuallybored @iloveethanramsey @natureblooms24 @chemist-ana @mercury84choices @casey-v @uneravine @mm2305 @mrsethanfreakingramsey @smilex1104 @missmiimiie @shanzay44 @sweetheartdetectivex @potionsprefect @headoverheelsforramsey @jerzwriter @mainstreetreader @coffeeheartaddict @adiehardfan @mia143

-----------------------

#newlyweds game #ask #messrprongs #e and d #dr. ethan ramsey x diana ramirez #queued

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starr-fall-knight-rise · 4 years ago

Text

Humans are space Orcs, “Interrogation.”

Wrote this after my first day of work, so forgive me if there are any issues.

Admiral Vir sighed and tilted his head back to stare up at the ceiling overhead. “You can make me wait here all day, it isn’t going to change my story.” He leaned back further in his chair to the point where he balanced on two legs, “You want to know why?” He turned his head towards the mirror across the room, which he was in no small doubt, was a one way mirror. He allowed the chair legs to drop and slam against the floor, “BECAUSE I AM TELLING THE TRUTH.”

He sighed and slammed his head against the table with a sigh. The energy cuffs on his wrists hummed, buzzing slightly against his skin when he moved.

He groaned, “I’ve told you countless times. I am-being-framed.” With every word, he accentuated his statement by slamming his forehead against the metal of the desk. Not hard enough to hurt, but he was just so bored that maybe pain would be better than just sitting here.

He sighed when no one came and looked around at the small room, the single table, the one way mirror and the two metal chairs, his hands chained to the desk in front of him.

He groaned and slumped down in his chair. Folding his arms before him, he rested his head against his arms taking a deep breath and sighed. Well maybe he might fit in a nap while they were working, at least that wouldn’t give them the satisfaction of knowing he wasn’t enjoying this.

He was asleep within seven minutes.

***

��YOU BASTARDS. YOU MONGRELS. YOU HARRY SYCOPHANTS. IF YOU HURT A HAIR ON HIS HEAD, I SWEAR I WILL RUIN YOU. ADAM VIR IS INNOCENT I TELL YOU, INNOCENT.”

“Stop.”

“I WILL TEAR THIS PRECINCT DOWN BRICK BY BRICK.”

“Krill!”

“DID YOU HEAR ME YOU FUZZY PISSANTS.”

“Krill STOP!”

His ranting was cut off as Sunny clamped a hand over his mouth and dragged him away from the front steps of the Tesraki prescient, “What are you doing! This isn’t going to help Adam. If anything that is going to make it so much worse.’

Krill turned his head to look up at her, eyes narrowed, “Who are you and what did you do with Sunny.”

She frowned, “what do you mean.”

“Are you kidding me Sunny! Your battle partner is in there, and who knows what could happen to him . Who knows what is happening to him as we wpeek Whoever framed him had a lot of ower and that means they have the power to murder him on the inside.”

Sunny snarled, “Don’t you think I know that Krill! I can’t believe I am saying this, least of all to you, but we have to be rational! Charging in there weapons blazing is only going to get us hurt, thrown in jail or killed, and neither of those would be useful to Adam right now. We have to prove that he is innocent!”

“What more proof can we get that they won’t just reject out of hand. It doesnt matter that he was traveling with the two of us, or that his ship is full of aliens, or that he is the head of a drev clan. Something bigger is going on here Sunny, we have to do something even BIGGER to fight this.”

She frowned tapping her fingers lightly against the bottom of her chin.

Great drops or rain began to fall from the sky plunking down on the pavement with subtle thudding noises.

“We have to find irrefutable proof, something they cant argue with even if they tried.”

“Where do we start.”

“That list Adam gave us should be a good start.”

Krill sighed, “Fine, but there isn’t time to be nice about this. We can’t rely on the authorities. We have to do this our way.”

***

SLAM

Adam jerked awake, his head ringing as he sat up in his chair staring around the room and groggily trying to find the source of the noise. It didn’t take long before he found what he was looking for. The Detective stood over him, his jacket hanging lank and long draped around his shoulders and towards the floor.

On the table before him, there sat a large cream file, which had likely been the source of the noise.

Adam frowned and sat back in his seat.

“Really, a file. Is that supposed to intimidate me or something?”

The Detective sat across from him, “Do you need us to get you anything Admiral.”

“How about the key out of here.”

The man frowned, “So you fancy yourself a comedian.”

“No, I fancy myself a free man.” he would have crossed his arms if the cuffs didn’t get in the way.

“Are you always this resistive to authority.”

Adam snorted, “I’m in the fucking army asshat of course I’m not. I am resistive to assholes who falsely accuse me of something I didn’t do and then ignore my friends when they try to stick up for me.”

“The Drev and the Vrul?”

“Yes.”

“We are looking into them as we speak. We are sure to find their link to your plot soon.”

Adam sputtered, “Plot, what plot you daft dimwit.” he wrigged his fingers comically, “My dastardly plot to give hugs to all the aliens in the universe, or how about my evil scheme to steal cake from the shared company fridge. Oh what a fucking moster I am.”

“Where did you put the body parts?”

He stopped in his tracks, “What the hell are you talking about?”

“The body parts of the first Tesraki, where did you put them.”

Adam shook his head in disbelief, “Look Detective dumbass, I didn’t put the Tesraki’s body parts anywhere… do you want to know why?”

The detective raised an eyebrow and leaned in a bit as Adam motioned him closer.

“BECAUSE I WASN’T EVEN ON THE FUCKING PLANET!”

The man nearly lept out of his skin with the strength of Adam’s voice. Adam sat back in his seat, “Just look at my ship’s log. I was busy working in the Perseus spiral of the Milky way before I was called in here. There was no way I could have been involved.”

“I know, we have a ship log that says you were there.”

He frowned, “Than why try to get me to admit to something I didn’t do.”

The man shook his head, “I didn’t say you didn’t do it, I just said that your ship’s logs seem to state that you were off world during that time.”

Adam huffed in anger and indignation, “Are you suggesting that I doctored my own ship reports?”

“You are the admiral, you do have executive control over things like that.”

Adam sighed in frustration, “I can’t even believe you right now. Changing a SINGLE long would prove nothing. I would have to change hours and hours mabe even days of data. Looking on the ship, you will find collected specimens and photos and videos taken during the time of the killing.” He rattled his hands against the chains, “You are a pretty ass detective if this is the best you can do.”

The man frowned, clearly not very impressed.

“Did you ever stop to think about why you are even here? I CALLED YOU IN. Why the ever loving hell would I do that if i thought there was even a chance that you could come in and catch me. It’s stupid, and it doesn’t add up.”

“You aren’t doing anything to make yourself look better Admiral.”

“Because I shouldn’t have to!”

“I beg to differ.”

***

A bright light flicked on in the darkness.

The human cringed back against it his feet scraping on the floor along with the metal of the chair, which he was tied to.

“Krill I-”

“Shh Sunny,”

The human squinted past the light in confusion and concern as two shadows coalesced before him and his eyes grew used to the glare. He shifted back in his seat, eyes wide as the two aliens stared back at him, one of those big shiny Drev and those weird spider things he forgot the name of.

The little creature paced back and forth in front of him, ‘You will find it interesting to know how easy it was to find you. After we found your three thug friends on the list, surprise surprise, guess how delighted we were to learn you were all staying in the same room together…. And one of you was missing.”

The an hook his head staring at the scuttling legs of the little bug creature as he crawled past, “I have no idea what you are talking about.”

“Don’t play dumb with me.” The bug turned to look at him, and he was suddenly very disconcerted by the angry glower that covered the creature’s face, It was too human of an expression to belong on an alien.

“Wha, wh… I have no idea what you are talking about, I swear.”

The little bug leaned forward, as something shiny appeared in his hand, ‘Oh I think you do.”

“Is that a scalpel.” He squeaked out

“Yes, why yes it is. I am a surgeon by the way.” He glowered at the human, “And I know over 100 ways to.” His voice grew quiet, “disembowel yo, while keeping you alive.”

The man’s eyes widened in panic.

“Krill!” THe Drev hissed.

“Shut up, Sunny.” The Little bug crawled forward, until he was right up in the human’s face. Did you know when I was in medical school, I learned how to completely dissect the nervous system of a krevling. My record…. Ten minutes and twenty three seconds.”

The man turned to look at the Drev, who, surprisingly, out of the two of them seemed less crazy and violent.

She caught his eye, “Maybe you should do what he says. I don’t think he’s kidding.”

THe bug creature inflated his helium sack and rose into the air scalpel held out nonchalantly. He leaned in close quietly, “I hear humans taste like chicken.”

His mouth quivered, “I, I thought you bugs only ate plants.”

The alien smacked his lips together, or at least made the approximation of smacking his lips together, “I don’t know a light based diet hasn’t really been sustaining me lately. He leaned a little further in, “besides, I think sauteed lightly in butter with a couple of onions…. You might just manage to convert me to carnivorism.”

The man pushed back against the ground, metal scraping against concrete until his back was planted right against the wall, “I…. I don’t know what is wrong with you, but I swear….”

THe Drev placed a hand on the bug’s shoulder, “krill, seriously, don’t you think this is going a little too far.”

“This coming from you, Sunny.” He shrugged hr off, “I think I would like his toes first.”

The human took a deep breath staring down into the little creature’s prismatic orange eyes, crazy eyes, manic eyes.

Sunny, the Drev shook her head, “Look we don’t really want to hurt you, we just want to help our friend.”

“Toes.” The Vrul whispered

The look on the creature’s face was enough to have him loose his nerve completely, “OK OK fine, I will tell you what you want to know, just don’t. Just don’t touch my toes, OK. you Freak.”

*** “Dear lord in heaven above give me the strength not to smash my head through this table.”

“Are you sure you don’t want something to drink.”

“You know that whole trying to be my friend thing isn’t going to work. You called me xenophobic after all, which is the msot damned insulting thing I have ever been called. My best friend is an alien, my g….my gr-reatest allies are aliens. I was the one who DISCOVERED them. I am the leader of a Drev CLAN for crying out loud.”

“People do things they don’t like for power.”

“Were you dropped on your head as a child or were you just born stupid.”

The Detective glowered at him, “Name calling isnt going to help you here.”

“I demand a lawyer.”

The detective snarled.

He tired to cross his arms but only managed to tug against his jacket, “I demand a lawyer immediately, and until I get one, I am not saying another word to you.”

“Admiral Vir, there is no law on the Tesraki homeworld that says.”

“Twinkle twinkle little star-”

“That is really mature Admiral.”

“Wanna hit you with my car.”

“Admiral.”

“Toss you off a cliff so high!” “Admiral, stop that right now.”

“HOPE YOU BREAK YOUR NECK AND DIE”

The detective was seen storming out of the interrogation room not minutes later fuming with the sound of lyrics followed him down the hall, which didn’t stop until the door closed all the way.

It would remain to be seen who was going to break first.

***

Sunny stared at Krill, and Krill did his best to ignore Sunny as he paced back and forth over the ground.

“What the hell was that.”

“What was what.”

“What you just did in there.”

“Interrogation.”

“That guy nearly shat himself.”

Krill looked up at her with a very serious expression, “That is what I was hoping for.”

“Have you gone insane.”

“No, not at all besides, it worked didn’t it.”

Sunny grumbled in acknowledgement. She supposed he was right. The revelations they had received from the man as he cowered back against his chair begging Krill not to cut off his nose.

Someone had hired the four of them for sure. He was in charge of locating their targets while the other three men did their dirty work. Following that he was supposed to doctor some information given to him by his outside source, “I fixed the surveillance to make it look like the admiral was there. I have the doctored files in my computer, and I was supposed to bring them to my source tomorrow night so they could use it as evidence against him.’

“And who are your contacts.’

“I don’t know, I never saw their faces, or asked questions. I was just the guy who dropped off what they needed.”

“Than that means you can take us to this dropoff point.”

“No I…”

“Did you know it only takes a spoon and less than a pound of pressure to pop a human eye out of it’s socket.”

“FINE FINE ILL TAKE YOU. Just get this crazy freak away from me.”

Sunny had grabbed krill then and dragged him out of the room with a disapproving frown.

“What you are a drev you should love scaring the shit out of people.”

“I love beating the shit out of people krill, not threatening to eat their toes.”

He shrugged seeming very unconcerned about the whole thing, “Either way, we have our way in. As long as Adam can hang in there, we might be able to save him.”

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thisbluespirit · 4 years ago

Text

James Maxwell TV/Film List

More of a guide than a recs list, because old tv/film depends so much on availability. It’s also hard as there’s nothing surviving that’s really like SotT for him (his voice is always slightly different, too & rarely the grand one from SotT) - I found it hard to find where to start back in the day, so I hope this makes it easier. However, I have starred my favourites (rated for JM content only).

I’ve divided things into categories and @jurijurijurious (or anyone) can make up their own mind as to what to go for. (Also @jurijurijurious I have NO idea what old telly you’ve already seen, so forgive me if I’m telling you things you already know.)

Where to find it: Luckily in the UK, it’s not too bad! Network Distributing are the DVD supplier to keep an eye on (they do great online sales), you can find secondhand things cheap on Amazon Marketplace & eBay, and several Freeview channels show old TV & film, especially Talking Pictures. I’ll note if things are on YT or Daily Motion, but they come and go all the time, so it’s always worth searching.

***

Film serials (ITC mainly)

British TV made on film in the US mode with transatlantic cash, so generally pretty light, episodic (continuity is almost unheard of) etc. Some turn up on ITV3 & 4 on a regular basis (colour eps).

*** Dangerman “A Date With Doris” (ITC 1964) James Maxwell is a British spy friend of Drake’s (Patrick MacGoohan) called Peter who gets framed for murder. Drake goes to Fake Cuba to rescue him by which time JM is dying from an infected wound and faints off every available surface, including the roof. It’s great. On YT. (The boxset is v pricey if you just want 2 eps.)

“Fair Exchange” (ITC 1964) JM is a German spy friend of Drake’s called Pieter who helps him out on a case. Not as gloriously hurt/comfort-y as the other, but it does have some excellent undercover dusting. (Why Patrick MacGoohan has JM clones all called variations on Peter dotted around the globeis a mystery.) On YT.

The Saint “The Inescapable Word” (ITC 1965) This is pretty terrible, but entertaining and James Maxwell plays the world’s most hopeless former-cop-turned-security guard. With bonus collapsing. On YT.

“The Art Collectors” (1967). JM is the villain of the week. It does include a v funny bit, though, where the Saint (Roger Moore) goes for JM’s fake hair (and who can blame him? How often I have felt the same!) This one’s in colour so should pop up on ITV3 or 4.

The Champions “The Silent Enemy” (ITC 1968). Surprisingly good JM content as the villain of the week who drugs sailors and steals their clothes before realising that maybe he should have worked out if he could operate a sub before he stole it.

The Protectors “The Bridge” (ITC 1974, 30 mins.) Not worth seeking out on its own, but ITV4 seems fond of it and James Maxwell gets to do some angsting and wears purple, so it’s worth snagging if you can, but too slight otherwise.

*** Thriller “Good Salary, Prospects, Free Coffin” (ITC 1975; 1hr 10mins, I think). James Maxwell moves in with Julian Glover and runs an overcomplicated murdery spy ring where they bicker a lot in between killing girls by advertisement and burying them in the back garden. What could possibly go wrong?? Anyway, it’s solid gold cheese, has bonus Julian Glover and a lot of natty knitwear. What more does an old telly fan want? (tw: Keith Barron being inexplicably the very meanest Thriller boyfriend.) On YT but tends to get taken down fast.

***

Films

Design for Loving (1962; comedy). Can be rented from the BFI online for £3.50. Isn’t that great or that bad (or that funny either), but does have JM as a dim layabout beatnik, which is atypical.

***The Traitors (1962). This is a low-key little 1hr long spy B-movie, but it’s also thoughtful and ambiguous with a nice 60s soundtrack and location work (it’s a bit New Wave-ish) and the central duo of JM and Patrick Allen are sweet and it all winds up with James Maxwell going in the swimming pool. One of the things where JM is actually American. (Talking Pictures show this occasionally & it is out on DVD as an extra on The Wind of Change.) The quality of the surviving film is not great, though.

***Girl on Approval (1962). A Rachel Roberts kitchen sink drama about a couple fostering a difficult teenager. It’s dated, but it’s also really interesting for a 1950s/60s slice of life (and very female-centric) & probably the only time on this list JM played an ordinary person.

***Otley (1969). Comedy that’s generally dated surprisingly well & is good fun, starring Tom Courtenay +cameos from what seems like the whole of British TV. JM is an incompetent red herring & there are more cardies and glasses as well as a random barometer.

Old Vic/Royal Exchange group productions

(Surviving works made by the group that JM was involved in from drama school to his death, made by Michael Elliott or Casper Wrede. I like them a lot mostly, but they are all slow and weird and earnest & not everybody’s cup of tea.)

Brand (BBC 1959). The BBC recording of the 59 Company’s (the name they were then using) landmark production, starring Patrick MacGoohan. This was a big deal in British theatre & launched the careers of everybody involved. It’s very relentless and weird but interesting & I’m glad they decided it was important enough to save. First fake beard alert of this post. It won’t be the last. On YT & there is a DVD, which is sometimes affordable and sometimes £500, depending on the time of day.

***Private Potter (1962). The original TV play is lost and this film has an extraneous storyline, but otherwise has most of the TV cast & gives a pretty good idea of why as a claustrophobic talky TV piece it made such an impact. Tom Courtenay is Private Potter, a soldier who claims to have had a vision of God during a mission & James Maxwell his CO who needs to decide what to do about this strange excuse for disobeying orders. Tw: fake eyebrows (!) and moustaches. Only available on YT.

[???]One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovitch (1970). Again, no DVD release (no idea why), but it is on YT. I haven’t seen this yet, but it’s another Casper Wrede effort starring Tom Courtenay and apparently JM is especially good in it. (I’m just not good at watching long things on YT and keep hoping for a DVD or TV showing.)

Ransom (1974). A more commercial effort starring Sean Connery & Ian McShane; it gets slated as not being a good action movie, but is clearly meant to be more thinky and political with the edge of a thriller. JM’s part isn’t large but Casper Wrede shoots his friend beautifully, & it’s a pretty decent film with nice cinematography, shot in Norway, as was One Day. I liked it.

[I think this post might be the longest in the world, whoops. Sorry!]

Cardboard TV (the best bit, obv)

One-off plays etc./mini-series

Out of the Unknown “The Dead Planet” Adaptation of an Asimov short story; this is very good for JM, but hard to get hold of unless you want the boxset. I think someone has some of the eps on Daily Motion. (His other OotU ep is sadly burninated.)

The Portrait of a Lady (BBC 1968). Adaptation of the novel; JM is Gilbert Osmond, so it is great for JM in quantity and his performance, but depends how you feel about him being skeevy in truly appalling facial hair. Do the bow ties and hand-holding make up for it? but he’s in 5 whole episodes, and Suzanne Neve, faced with Richard Chamberlain, Edward Fox, and Ed Bishop as suitors, chooses instead to marry the worst possible James Maxwell. Relatable. XD

***Dracula (ITV 1968, part of Mystery & Imagination). JM is Dr Seward, fainty snowflake of vampire hunters, who falls over, sobs and can’t cope for most of the 1 hr 20 mins. More facial hair, but not as offensive as last time. Suzanne Neve is back again, although now JM is nice, she’s married Corin Redgrave, who’s more into Denholm Elliott. Anyway, I love this so much because it turned out that I love Dracula as well as shaky old TV with people I like in getting to fight vampires and all be shippy. Good news - TP keep showing M&I, the DVD is out, and there are two versions of it up on YT.

The Prison (Armchair Cinema 1974). This is the one with Lincoln in it, but it’s not that great & JM isn’t in it that much, so depends how curious you are for the modern AU! (But my Euston films allergy is worse than my ITC allergy, and I watched this when very unwell, so I may have been unfair.)

Crown Court “Fitton vs. Pusey” (1973) - part of the Crown Court series, set in a town full of clones who all keep returning to court. JM is on trial for his behaviour in (the Korean war? I forget?) although he ought to be on trial for his terrible moustache. It’s not that great, but it is nice JM content. He probably did it, but for reasons, and he wibbles & panics whenever his wife leaves the courtroom. Also on YT.

*** Raffles “The Amateur Cracksman” (ITV 1975) - He is Inspector Mckenzie in the Raffles pilot & is a lot of fun. At one point when there was a Raffles fandom someone in it claimed he was too gay for Raffles, which I’m still laughing about, because Raffles. Anyway, watch out if you try to get the DVD because it is NOT included in S1, whatever lies Amazon tells. It is up somewhere online, though, I think.

Bognor “Unbecoming Habits” (1981). Some down marks for possibly the worst 80s theme & incidiental music ever, but fun & has been shown on Talking Pictures lately. JM is an Abbot running a honey-making friary that is actually a hotbed of spies, murder, gay sex and squash playing. This is the point at which he chooses to strip off on screen for the first time, because strong squash-playing abbots do that kind of thing apparently.

Guest of the week in ongoing series/serials

Since even series with a lot of continuity tended to write episodes as self-contained plays (like SotT), these are usually accessible on their own.

Manhunt “Death Wish” (1970). This is one of the most serialised shows here, but this episode is still fairly contained. WWII drama about three Resistance agents on the run across France. JM is... a Nazi agent & former academic trying to break an old friend (one of the series’ three leads, Peter Barkworth) with kindness, possibly?? (Manhunt is very angry and psychological & dark and obv. comes with major WWII warnings (& more if you want to try the whole thing), but it’s also v good.) Up on YT, I think.

Doomwatch “The Iron Doctor” (BBC S2 1971). “Doomwatch” is the nickname of a gov’t dept led by Dr Spencer Quist that investigates new scientific projects for abuse/corruption/things that might cause fish to make men infertile etc. etc. JM is a surgeon who comes to their attention because he’s a bit too in love with his computer for the comfort of one of his more junior colleagues. (I think it’s perfectly comprehensible & a nice guest turn, but it is hard to get hold of outside of the series DVD. Which, being a cult TV person, I loved a lot anyway, but YMMV!)

***Hadleigh “The Caper” (S3 1973). Hadleigh is a very middle of the road show, but watchable enough (lead is Gerald Harper, who’s always entertaining) and this is pretty self-contained as it centres around an old con-man friend (JM) of Hadleigh’s manservant causing trouble by pretending to be Gerald Harper, for reasons. JM seems to be having a ball.

Justice 2 episodes, S3 1974. He guests twice as an opposing barrister & gets to be part of some nice showdown court scenes. Again, a middle of the road drama, but stars Margaret Lockwood, who was still just as awesome in the 1970s as she was in the 1930s & 40s. On YT.

Father Brown “The Curse of the Golden Cross” (1974). JM is an American archaeologist getting death threats; stars Kenneth More as Father Brown. Just a note, though, that 1970s TV adaptations tended to be really really faithful and this is one of the stories where Chesterton comes out with an anti-semitic moment... (JM was unconscious for that bit and, frankly, I envied him.) But otherwise lots of angsting in yet another fake moustache about someone trying to kill him.

The Hanged Man “The Bridge Maker” (1975). Confession time, I have v little idea what this one was about apart from Ray Smith being an unlikely Eastern European dictator, as this whole series went over my head and was not really my thing. (Ask @mariocki they’re cleverer than me and liked it & can probably explain the plot!) I don’t know if it’s available anywhere off the DVD but on a JM scale it was v good/different as he was a coldly villainous head of security & it wouldn’t be too bad to watch alone, but there was an overarching plot going on somewhere.

Doctor Who “Underworld” (1978). This is famously one of the worst serials in the whole of classic Who, but largely because of behind-the-scenes circumstances, not the guest cast. There is some nice stuff, though, esp in Ep1 (JM is a near-immortal alien who’d like to lay down and die but still the Quest is the Quest as they say... a lot) & it’s bound to pop up on YT or Daily Motion. The DVD has extras that include v v brief bits of JM speaking in his actual real accent (which he otherwise does in NONE of these) & making jokes in character. Honestly, though, this is the only DW where the behind-the-scenes doc is genuinely the most exciting bit as they desperately invented whole new technologies & methods of working to bring us this serial, and then everybody wished they hadn’t.

*** Enemy at the Door “Treason” (LWT 1978). This is a weird episode but I love it lots - from a (v v good) series about the occupation of the Channel Islands. (So obv warnings for WWII & Nazis.) JM is a visiting German Generalmajor, but he’s come for a very unusual reason - to ask for help from his brother-in-law, a blackballed British army officer (Joss Ackland). It’s all weird and low key and JM is doomed and nevertheless probably my favourite thing of his that isn’t SotT.

* The Racing Game 2 eps (1979). Adaptation of Dick Francis’s first Sid Halley novel Odds Against (ep1) + 5 original stories for the series. This is an interesting one - JM plays Sid’s father-in-law & they have a lovely relationship that’s central to the book BUT Dick Francis loved this adaptation and Mike Gwilym who played Sid and was inspired to write a sequel Whip Hand, which he tied in with TV canon - and adopted at least three of the cast, including JM. Which means that all the Sid & Charles fanfic is also JM fic by default and it’s quite impressive. (There’s not much but it’s GOOD.) On YT.

Bergerac “Treasure Hunt” (1981). Not a major role, but pretty nice & it’s one a Christmas ep of the detective show (also set on the Channel Islands) that involved Liza Goddard’s cat burglar, which was always the best bit of Bergerac.

His guest spots in Rumpole of the Bailey (1991) “Rumpole a la Carte” and Dr Finlay (1994) are both really just cameos, but both series come round on Freeview; the Rumpole one is funny and the Dr Finlay one his last screen appearance before his death the following year.

Not worth getting just for JM: Subway in the Sky; Bill Brand and Oppenheimer.

These films only have cameos but some quite fun ones and they come around on terrestrial TV: The Damned (1962), The Evil of Frankenstein (1964) & (more briefly) Far From the Madding Crowd (1967). (I think his cameo in Connecting Doors must be at least recognisable as someone spotted him in it just based off my gifs, but it’s not come my way yet.) I’ve never been able to get hold of any of his radio performances, not even the 1990s one.

ETA: I forgot The Power Game! This is the one surviving series where he occurs as a semi-regular (at least until halfway through S1 when he went off to the BBC to be in the now-burninated Hunchback of Notre Dame). This isn’t standalone, but it’s a good series and it is on YT. See how you go with crackly old TV before you brave it but it’s the snarkiest thing ever made about people making concrete and stabbing each other in the back. JM is a civil servant who tries to run the National Export Board and is plagued by Patrick Wymark and Clifford Evans as warring businessmen.

***

[... Well, now I just feel scary. 0_o In my defence, I have been stuck home bored & ill for years, and often unable to watch modern TV while trying to cheer myself up with James Maxwell, so I didn’t watch all of this at once. It just... happened eventually after SotT. /waves hand

But if anyone feels the need to unfriend my quietly at this point, I understand. /o\]

#james maxwell #masterlist #rec list #well sort of #1950s #1960s #1970s #1980s #there are some things i haven't seen #and some things i know to be extant but unreleased #everything else is burninated or status unknown

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fandom-necromancer · 5 years ago

Text

1024. You seem… lost. Is there anything I can do to help?

Okay this is actually an idea for a big story I condensed into a 4-parter of shorts. I mean at my pace I could start writing this full length in 25 years, so... Yeah, better condense it XD

Fandom: Detroit become human | Ship: Reed900 [Part 2] [Part 3] [Part 4] [part5] [part6]

‘Reed!’ ‘Ugh, what is it, Chris?’ Gavin demonstrated his disinterest by leaning back and propping up his legs on the desk. ‘New android joining our team. You gonna pick it up tomorrow morning from Cyberlife.’ ‘Yeah like hell I will.’ ‘Reed, don’t do this to me’, Chris sighed. ‘It’s Fowler’s order.’ ‘I don’t care, I’ll not end up like Hank and partner up with some plastic prick. Doesn’t matter they are persons now, they are still phcking artificial goddamn robots.’ ‘You don’t need to partner up with one. Fowler doesn’t want some HR-fiasco if he can avoid it. As far as I know that’s some bot for Lewis. You just have to pick it up because you are the one living closest to that damn tower. Just play nice for one car ride, that’s all.’ ‘Fine. Still can’t believe we get more of these phcking things…’ ‘At least the new one isn’t replacing someone. They talked about needing more android officers to avoid some racist issues.’ ‘Yeah, okay, doesn’t matter anyways. Lewis’ desk is far enough away from mine.’ ‘Good.’

Gavin didn’t like the decision to add new android officers to the force. But he also knew there was no way to stop the world from changing and now that androids had rights, there sure were people who would have fun breaking them. He knew of the old days when there had been injustice and corruption plagued the force and hell, they had all been human back then. No, as long as the damn plastics kept out of his business and didn’t pester him with friendly talking about nothing, he would manage. Just a little detour from his home to the tower and back to work. Roughly fifteen minutes added to his work commute not taking into account he would most likely have to wait in some neat lobby. Meaning he would have to get up a bit earlier than normal. The things he did for money…

He sat in his car, coffee cup in hand, while waiting at the red light of the crossroads that would lead him to the bridge over to belle isle. The light turned green and he began driving again, setting down his cup in fluid, automatic motions. The bridge was devoid of cars, he remembered the vans passing endlessly before the revolution. The gigantic corporation was struggling to adapt to the new situation. They couldn’t produce new androids and sell them to the highest bidder, because that was considered slavery nowadays. They couldn’t produce androids that were immune to deviancy, because that would cause a massive shitstorm from the robot population. But well, people would always find something to make money with and then exploit it just enough to make people rich but not to make headlines.

Still Cyberlife was just delaying the inevitable. It was dying. It was producing spares and upgrades for androids and changed their image to something caring. Androids could get repaired at their centres and could get in contact with them to apply for jobs and find homes. But when New Jericho was still there to make sure android rights were taken seriously and basically supplied the same service, it was hard to compete. Even Gavin couldn’t blame an android to confide into their own over some corporation that took you for an object.

But well, they tried. New slogans all over the roads, telling androids in bright colours they were welcome and Cyberlife was there for them. And someone must had believed them, because at least one android had just gotten a job at the police. How lucky, others would have to work for it. Gavin grit his teeth as he parked his car and walked up the stairs to enter a lobby that spoke of the money made from selling the very robots they now treated as equal. Well, he couldn’t care less as he walked up to the reception and told the pretty woman behind the counter why he was here. Of course, he was told to sit and wait for the android to arrive. Gavin thanked her and didn’t do as told. Instead he wandered through the huge lobby, looking the enormous statues up and down, touching the plants to see if they were real - they were to his surprise - and wandering some more. At this time, he would be late. Damn Fowler if he dared to not pay him full time for this bullsh-

‘You seem… lost. Is there anything I can do to help?’

By now Gavin was far into the area behind the reception not knowing if access was restricted and not really caring about it either. If no one had stopped him, it was their fault, not his. He turned around to look into Connor’s face. Or was it? The tin-can wore a different uniform, wore one at all that was and his face looked different too, although Gavin couldn’t pinpoint exactly what was different. ‘Another RK800 unit?’, he asked and the bot grinned in surprise. ‘RK900, actually. But very close, I am impressed! Do you know any RK800s by chance?’ ‘Yeah, got two of these nagging assholes in my precinct’, he muttered to himself, looking around for a way out. The android in front of him looked every bit the sort of person who wouldn’t shut up talking, because all cues from Gavin’s abrasive body-language went way over his head. ‘Precinct? Are you a police officer?’ ‘Detective, actually.’ God, could this new android please appear anytime in the next century? He would do anything to get away from this baby droid?

‘Oh, that is fascinating! How is being a detective like? My predecessor, the RK800 was designed to be one! I always wondered how it would be.’ Gavin groaned. ‘Well, how about you ask them then, tin-can? I’m sure they would be glad to talk your damn ears off about it.’ ‘Oh.’ The android let his head fall and as Gavin looked at him, he smiled apologetically. He was bigger than Connor, he realised now. And what was different about his face were his eyes. Weren’t Connors brown and not blue? ‘I… Err… I never met a RK800.’ ‘Yeah, I think Connor told me something about being a prototype or something.’ He was still looking for a way out of this conversation but figured the universe wouldn’t be so generous to him. ‘You met Connor? The Connor? The one that helped Markus?’ ‘Yep’, Gavin sighed. ‘That very super nice, definitely not manipulative at all, asshole puppy.’ ‘He must me very friendly. I heard he is very famous. The deviant hunter that turned to help androidkind. I hope to be like him some day.’ ‘Nah, he isn’t that shining star in the sky. Believe me, he knocked me out cold once. I would try searching for some other android idol.’ ‘Do you know anyone else?’ ‘Hey, you are the android, you tell me.’ ‘I don’t know anyone.’

That made Gavin stop his search for a way out for a few beats. ‘Wait a minute. What do you mean you don’t know anyone?’ ‘I was told I am dangerous. I can’t be let near another android because they fear me acting on my programming regardless of me being deviant or not. I live here in this lobby. Security is strongest here in case I try something, and I can stay active like this.’ ‘Wait, wait, wait! You are telling me you never set a foot outside this lobby?’ ‘No. I mean, I spend my days in an underground lab before. But seeing your shocked expression that doesn’t seem to be better.’ ‘No, of course not! You are a damn prisoner here!’ ‘I don’t understand. I am free to go where I want as long as that’s inside here.’ ‘And what do you do all day?’ ‘I watch the people passing by. Sometimes it’s androids coming in and leaving again, sometimes it’s humans leaving with another android. I like to imagine what they do once they left.’ ‘And that is enough for you?’, Gavin asked disbelievingly. ‘I know that this is all I can do without hurting someone. So, I am content with what I have.’ ‘Really? Aren’t you bored? Don’t you want more?’ Gavin couldn’t believe someone to be content with wasting their life away, regardless of human or android. ‘Of course I want more’, the RK900 said, face distorted in a pained expression. ‘I would love to meet new people and see the world. But I can’t. I would hurt people. And I can’t let that happen.’ ‘How do you know you would hurt people? Did that ever happen?’ ‘No. But would you take the risk just to have some nice moments outside? I couldn’t forgive myself if I caused harm.’

‘But-‘ ‘Reed? Detective Reed to the reception please.’ Gavin looked back to the entrance of the lobby, then back to the android. ‘Guess I’ll have to go then’, he muttered and pointed behind himself. ‘Y-Yeah! I guess so, too. It was very nice talking to you!’ Gavin was heading back to the reception as the android called after him: ‘Good luck with your work and stay safe!’

Everything after that felt weirdly numb: The android, a woman named Rita, introducing herself to him with a firm handshake, the ride to work with light conversation Gavin half-heartedly played along to, him arriving at work and getting a coffee on autopilot. All that was overshadowed by a foggy feeling in his guts at the thought of the android being confined to the small lobby because something could go wrong probably. At the rate that humans snapped at others, was that really so much of a risk? He ended up with the conclusion that he didn’t know enough to judge and that it wasn’t his business.

But still that feeling didn’t go anywhere.

[> Next part]

#detroit become human #dbh #Reed900 #Gavin Reed #RK900 #another case of severe soft Nines #This doesn't mean I will never write the big story but I have a list to work off so it will take me a lot of time to ever get there XD #Especially considering the rate I get new ideas at this is a curse #a beautiful curse but still

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queen-ofsunflowers · 6 years ago

Text

Queen Plays KH3 Pt. 3

TIME PLAYED: 28 hrs, 4 min.

CURRENT LEVEL: 40

DEATH COUNTER: 32

WORLDS COMPLETED:

Olympus

Twilight Town

Toy Box

Kingdom of Corona

Monstropolis

100 Acre Wood

Arendelle

The Carribean

San Fransokyo

The Final World

The rest is under the cut to avoid spoilers. Read at your own risk... though most of it is just keysmashin at the end.

Starting off with the Caribbean. And I like Jack, I really do. But I wanna smack him, he's such a jerk. And I think we died? We fell off the edge of the world and now Elizabeth is saying we ending up in Davy Jones's Locker. Great, but I'VE DIED 14 TIMES AT THIS POINT. It's just funny to me.

Should be noted I've never seen Pirates of the Caribbean. So I'm a little lost on all this.

Sora has a lil crown on his hat I love it.

Jack is a jerk to Will and Elizabeth. After KH2, I do not trust Barbossa. At all.

Something tells me I'm gonna fail A LOT at the ship driving thing.

Sora ain't afraid of no Kraken. He's faced worse. A lil Kraken ain't anything.

Vexen creeps me out a little right now. And what did Xemnas tell Luxord? Must have been something because I feel something is off. Anyway, there must be a reason Vexen wants to finish his work so bad. I wanna know it. I NEED TO KNOW IT.

It's so weird seeing Sora without gloves on. He has nice hands.

SORA BEING SO BADASS. JUST FLOWMOTIONING ON THE SMOKE AND RIDING THE HEARTLESS. SO CINMEATICALLY BEAUTIFUL.

I DIED THREE TIMES IN THAT BATTLE. THREE. TIMES.

And then Sora went splat.

Is that what Tia Dalma said to Sora? What is she talking about? Free her from what? Eh. We'll find out.

Something tells me, when Sora was a kid... he wanted to be a pirate. Very badly.

Jack may be a jerk, but he's a jerk who's not gonna leave a kid in a cavern.

Luxord calling parley and I'm like "not this shit again"

Jack Sparrow is such a DUMBASS.

Technically, Sora drives the Gummi Ship. He's the captain of it then, right?

Wait what. WAIT WHAT. OH MY GOD CRAB JACK EXPLODED.

The graphics in this world are so GOOD OH MY GOSH

IS ELIZABETH THE PIRATE KING? QUEEN? ... I need to watch these movies now.

When an encounter is cut off by a cutscene. Also, WTF is up with the way Sora pronounced Luxord? Like... "luke sword" is that how you're supposed to say it? I don't remember. I'm gonna continue to say Lux-ord. Say it like how spelled.

DEATH COUNT KEEPS GETTING HIGHER WITH THIS FIGHT. I'M UP TO 19. I'm gonna look up a walkthrough to help, hold on-- I gotta level up this fucking ship before I go any further. I don't want to die a bunch. Putting the story on hold for now. Gotta find crabs. That sounds so weird to say.

I love how the sounds underwater are muffled. It's a nice detail.

THIS BATTLE MAY COUNT FOR HALF OF MY DEATHS (27 so far) BUT I FINALLY BEAT THAT PIRATE GAMBLER WANNABE. OH SWEET LORD YES.

So Will and Co. Ddd our job for us. Or did they? Tia Dalma/Calypso... can she help us? She's a prisoner. But Sora's giving a protagonist speech, so I'm not complaining.

Sora joining in Elizabeth's speech, like... do you even know what "hoist the colors" means boy?!

The Organization are looking for hope. I can see the gears turning in Sora's head. Maybe they aren't so bad after all? Hmm.

"Then I invoke the right of parle--" Jack just comes up to Luxord, puts a finger to his mouth. Like... "No. No parley." Bitch finally learned.

RIP Luxord. Also, something tells me he was pirate before becoming a Nobody. I don't know, just a hunch.

Sora probably knows more about the heart than others. And Jack and I can agree on something.

Jones, stabs Will. SORA LITERALLY LOSES HIS SHIT AND TACKLES THE SQUIDMAN LIKE... YES BUT NO. RIP DAVY JONES. But seriously. THIS SCENE IS SO SAD OH MY GOD WYF JUST HAPPENED!? CAN SOMEONE EXPLAIN?!

WTF WILL?! HOW IS HE ALIVE?! Wait... And thank you for explaining it right after I figured it out.

Jack is a major mood right now.

MY SHIP WAS JUST A BUNCH OF FUCKING CRABS.

Back with our redheads, Axel's having emotional problems. Talk about them man. Just talk.

LEA REMEMBERS VENTUS. HE REMEMBERS VEN.

I REMMEMVER THIS PART FROM THE TRAILER. NO, MICKEY. SAVE HIM RIKU.

Cut to Ansem the wise, and Ansem SOB

YAS KIDS YAS. I LOVE HAYNER PENCE AND OLETTE RIGHT NIW. THESE KIDS OH MY GOSH.

Why did the Nobody protect him?!WHAT IS GOING ON?!

VEXEN GET OUT.

Wait what?! Um... WHAT?! AND THE SCENE CUTS OFF THERE LIKE WTF. IS HE A SPY?! IS EVEN JUST PLAYING VEXEN WTF?!

I love Sora's reactions in San Fransokyo. They're so dorky. SORA IS SUCH A DORK I LOVE HIM.

I wanna hug from Baymax.

Sora is a simple Island boy, he's so fascinated by tech.

It sounds like they're saying Yu-Gi-Oh. Is that just me? ITS TIME TO DUEL. THE HEARTLESS.

SORA DOESN'T KNOW WHAT A FIST BUMP IS. THAT WAS SO CUTE.

AHHH SORA AND ROXAS. THAT WAS... JUST... "I'M WITH YOU"... AHHH

What are those things? Are they from Coded? I'm not sure... and that ain't a good thing.

REPLICA. Oh wait, no... I don't think so anyway?

Goofy talking sense into Sora. It's the dad in him.

His eyes also look more hazel than gold.

BAYMAX. WHY MUST YOU DO THIS FAKE RIKU. WHY.

Just like the end of the movie, the end of this world is so freaking SAD. ... I TAKE IT BACK ITS SO FREAKING SWEET!!!! Its official. That is my favorite world now.

Now it's time for the beginning of the end.

RIKU MICKEY NO. Really hope Sora knows what he's doing.

OH MY GOD. THAT. OH MY GOD.

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO. I KNOW THIS FROM THE TRAILER. NO THIS ISN'T GOOD. THIS CANT BE GOOD.

Can I say that Riku has grown so much since the first game? Because he has. It's good and I love AND NOW LETS SAVE AQUA

Sora is a... wha. SORA. BROS. SAVING THE DAY ONCE AGAIN. AHHHHH YESSS. AQUA IM SO SORRY I HAD TO DO THIS. PLEASE BE OKAY.

SHE'S OKAY. SORA SAVED HER SHE'S OKAY. TEN YEARS AND SHE'S OKAY I CANT STOP SMILING.

AHHH EVEN AND DEMYX. I knew that Demyx wasn't like... dark. Even had me going, that's for sure. BUT YES. EVERYTHING IS GOOD YES.

OH. I have a theory. And if right... Please let it be right...

THEY HAVE IT. YES DEMYX YES. THEY HAVE THE BODY.

OH MY GOD IENZO AND ANSEM... I COULDN'T STOP SMILING THAT WHOLE TIME JUST THE EMOTION IN THAT WHOLE SCENE--

THE LAND OF DEPATURE. SHE'S FIXING HER HOME. NOW LET'S GO GET VEN!!! AND VANITAS RUINS EVERYTHING. AND AQUA KICKS ASS. YAS QUEEN.

Wait what's going on??? VEN?! IS SORA GONNA HES WAKING HIM UP. HES WAKING HIM UP. VENTUS IS AWAKE. MY BBY BOY ISAWALE!!! "Good morning, Ven." MY HEART.

Lea is a MAJOR MOOD.

MY HEART. THEY STILL HAVE THEIR WAYFINDERS.

THE SCENE BETWEEN LEA AND SAIX. OH MY HEART. HE JUST WANTS HIS FRIENDS. AND HOW ARE THESE TWO NOT REALIZING YET THAT THE GIRL IS KAIRI?! I mean... I know it was ten years ago, but given all that you know so far... guys. Come on. Lea, you should at ke in st put the pieces together by now.

Though, it was nice to get an explantion on WHY Isa and Lea were turned into Nobodies. They just wanted to save Kairi. They were just... a little too late.

REPLICA RIKU. THE PRESENT DAY ONE I GUESS??? AHHH. It is only later that my dumbass realizes that this is Past!Riku, the one controlled by Ansem. Forgive me about this.

MY KIDS. SO SWEET.

The day has finally come. I am ready. ... I am not ready.

AND THE CHOSEN KICK ASS. With a train. Woo woo.

What just happened. WHAT JUST HAPPENED?! I DIED?!

CHIRITHY. His voice sounds familiar...

Words cannot describe... how amazing the next few scenes are. Like... Sora... my man... I just... I want everything for you. Please let everyone survive this to the end.

THEKEYBLADES U ION CROSS HAS A REASON FOR EXISTING. AHHH MY BOY.

RIKU NO. HIW DO YOU NOT REMEMBER. Never mind answered my own question. Xehanort’s heart and shit. Nevermind. Time to kick heartless ass.

Also, just noticed that Lea's Keyblade glows. And he's holding it the same way he did his chakrams. Nice.

Yen Sid coming to save our asses. THA K YOU. And thank you, Donald. Goofy. Thanks.

And now... the final battle truly begins... tomorrow.

It's late now, and I'm a bit sad because I really wanted to beat this game today. I'm keeping my fingers crossed I can finish it before I have to go to work tomorrow, if not then on Sunday.

Guys... wish me luck. I'll take advice if anyone has any...

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lpdwillwrite4coffee · 5 years ago

Text

CHILDREN OF LILITH CHAPTER THREE

A quick knock sounded and Nikki trotted to the door.

Flinging it open, she sighed, exasperated. “I need help.”

Kaelin frowned, looking her over. “Why aren’t you dressed?”

“I need help,” Nikki repeated. “This is worse than the fashion crisis of ’09.”

“I highly doubt that,” Kaelin said, dropping her coat and purse on the couch and following Nikki to her bedroom. “At least now your eyebrows are back to their normal shape.”

“You miss one waxing appointment and never live it down,” Nikki muttered, shoving a section of clothes hanging in her closet to the side.

Kaelin sat on the edge of the bed, sweeping her wavy brown hair over her shoulder. “So what’s the emergency?”

“What’s the quintessential stereotypical crisis every woman goes through at least once a week?”

“Whether or not to get their Master’s degree?”

“Not having anything to wear.” Nikki pulled out a gauzy floral top, holding it up for inspection. Kaelin wrinkled her nose at it.

“I thought you were gonna wear that cute black dress you wore to my company holiday party last year,” Kaelin said, crossing her legs at the knee, shiny black stilettos catching the light.

“Yeah and remember what happened? I slipped in a puddle of eggnog and ended up showing your entire accounting department my Brainy Smurf undies.”

Kaelin laughed. “Oh yeah, I forgot about that!”

“Well it was after your third Jaeger bomb,” Nikki said, picking out another top. “It’s a miracle you remember even being there.”

“You know what I wish I didn’t remember? Hooking up with Martin from Human Resources. Seriously, why didn’t you stop me?”

“I was too busy trying to fend off one of the drunk VPs, whose wife by the way, was none too pleased.” Nikki vetoed the new top and sighed. “Help,” she said, turning back to her friend.

“Okay, okay,” Kaelin hopped up and strode to stand next to her. “We’ve decided against anything short and in dress form… What about this?” She pointed at a light blue chiffon blouse.

“It’s see through,” Nikki said.

Kaelin blinked at her. “And…?”

“And I want guys to ask my name, not my price.”

Putting it back, her friend sighed. “Alright… What about this one? It’s cute.”

“I bought it when I’d gained ten pounds and it all went to my boobs. Now it’s just a sad reminder of what once was,” she said wistfully.

“Okay, I’m going in blind.” Kaelin covered her eyes and reached into the closet. Her fingers snagged on an emerald and silver scoop neck top with delicate embroidery at the hem.

Nikki’s eyes popped. “I forgot I had this,” she said, taking it from her.

“How could you forget something so gorgeous?”

“Temporary insanity,” she said, holding it up to herself. “I think it’ll still fit.”

“Then what are you waiting for Cinderella?”

Nikki started to take off her basic white tee shirt, but paused and glanced at Kaelin. “Um, could you maybe not look?”

She arched an eyebrow. “You do realize we’ve seen each other’s lady parts about a gazillion times right?”

“I know… I’m just having a low confidence day and don’t wanna think about you seeing my love handles.”

Suspicious, Kaelin obliged, covering her eyes again with her hand. “Better?”

Nikki smiled. “Much,” she said.

While it was true her self-esteem wasn’t at peak levels, it wasn’t the only reason Nikki had requested privacy. She didn’t want Kaelin to see the marks.

Dark inky bruises had popped up overnight, fanning across her abdomen and hips. There was no way she had run into anything hard enough to cause such severe injuries, not even on the worst day of work. Of course if Kaelin saw them she would immediately think she’d been hurt, no matter what Nikki told her. Hell, if she heard someone say Oh, those just showed up one day, and I don’t know how, she wouldn’t believe them either. It was easier to hide them until she saw her doctor again. He’d said the new migraine medication he put her on could have side effects, he just didn’t say she’d look like she’d gone several rounds with a world champion boxer.

When she was sure none of them were visible under the hem of her shirt, she announced she was finished.

“Oh my God you’re a super model,” Kaelin exclaimed.

“Trying to flatter me into buying you two chocolate martinis?”

“That depends. Is it working?”

She pursed her lips, feigning deep thought. “Maybe… I still haven’t heard anything about my ass though…”

“And your ass looks fantastic!” Kaelin said, excitedly gesturing. “All three Kardashian sisters are cursing God for not giving them your fabulous booty.”

“Alright, stop before you embarrass yourself.”

“Too late. Remember Martin?”

Nikki laughed. “Well lets go find you a man who will wash away all memories of HR Martin.”

“Ooh, can he have an accent?”

“I’ll see what I can do.” Nikki gathered her purse and keys as they headed for the door. She started to turn the knob when Kaelin pulled up short.

“Wait,” she said, tugging Nikki’s forearm.

“What is it?”

“We can’t go.”

Nikki frowned, skin pricking with worry. “What? Why?”

“Because…” Kaelin backed up, heading towards the bedroom again. She disappeared, leaving Nikki where she stood. A moment later she returned, jubilant. “We forgot these.” Dangling from her fingers was a very long strand of condoms.

“Oh my God, are you planning on banging an entire Navy fleet?” Nikki gaped.

“Like that’s even possible.” Kaelin rolled her eyes. “You know it’s not Fleet-week.”

“Oh forgive me. I mixed up my annual sex holidays.”

“Do I need to write them on your calendar? ‘Cause you know I will.”

“Could you please put the Trojans in your bag?” Nikki pushed the prophylactics back at her friend.

“You take them. You’re the one we’re trying to get laid here.”

“First of all, we are not trying to ‘get me laid’. And secondly, even if we were, I would need one, possibly two, condoms max. Not half the box.” She waved her hand at the condom rope she was sure she could double-dutch with.

Kaelin found the middle perforation and ripped it apart. “Fine, I’ll take half and you take half. Better?”

“Sure.” Nikki took them quickly and shoved them into her purse. “Now can we go?”

“Of course we can you naughty girl.” Kaelin winked.

Sighing, Nikki opened the door. “Remind me why we’re friends…”

“Because you need someone to borrow clothes from.”

“Oh, that’s right.”

They stopped outside the building long enough for Nikki to lock the front door, cold air whipping around her legs and tangling her hair. While Kaelin went to hail a cab, Nikki finished with the deadbolt and shoved her keys into her purse.

A new chill crept up her back, raising goosebumps in its wake. Nikki tried to tell herself it was the weather, but the undeniable churning dread in her gut made it hard to believe. She glanced around, searching for the source, but found nothing. The block was quiet, save for a few cars and the mini mart on the corner.

“Hey, you ready?” Kaelin called, opening up the taxi door.

Nikki nodded. “Yeah, I’m coming.”

Ignoring the clawing urge to run back inside, Nikki climbed into the car after her friend and forced herself to smile. Everything was fine…

* * *

Griffin slid down into his overstuffed leather chair and stared at the towering bookshelf across from him. He should pick something to read. Reading always helped even him out after a long day, but he couldn’t focus his vision for very long. Lisa was probably right, that last knock on the head might’ve given him more than just another bruise.

Concussed or not, Griffin wasn’t in a mood to do much of anything.

Exhaustion weighed him down with aching bones. But it was nothing compared to the brutal ravaging of the inside of his skull.

The dogs were awake, and starving.

God, shut up, he thought with a hiss. You’ve had enough. Just… let me rest.

His… gift howled.

“I said no,” he muttered, slumping against the cushions, left side screaming in protest. He groaned, wrapping an arm around his abdomen.

A fractured rib, or maybe two, if he guessed from where the pain radiated. At least he’d healed up alright from the previous breaks.

The barrier he’d struggled to keep up all day began to bow under the pressure, the dogs tearing and clawing at his head, trying to get free. Shutting his eyes, Griffin took a deep breath and pushed back, supporting the mental walls built around his gift. They wouldn’t hold much longer, but it was better than nothing.

Somewhere down the hall, a door slammed in a hurry, making Griffin jerk. With his grip loose, the dogs lunged and tore out of their cage, rushing for the nearest subconscious. Memories flowed into Griffin like dirty sand, scraping as it smothered his own thoughts. He recognized the emotional signature, and choked out a sigh of relief. It was Boz. He was in Boz’s head. Better a friend than a random stranger passing on the street below.

But the dogs were ravenous, and just like any hungry animal, they sought out the most nourishing prey. That meant the deepest, heaviest memories. Things people wished they could forget…

I bet you can’t reach that top branch, Boz had called out to his younger brother.

I can too! Just watch!

The pungent odor of wet soil and cut grass filled Griffin’s nose. He heard birds in the distance, sunlight hot on the side of his face. His hands clenched, palms aching from phantom tree bark rubbing them raw.

No Liam, wait!

I can do it Boz!

But-

I’m almost to the top!

Wood splintering and the scared yelp of a little boy had Griffin surging forward; reacting to the vision only he could see. Sobbing still rang in his ears as he yanked on the dogs’ leash, desperate to haul them back to their cage.

B-Boz! I th-think it’s broken!

Hold on Liam, I’ll get mom!

With the little strength Griffin had left, he pulled his gift out of Boz’s head, but it didn’t come without a fight. Feral creatures never did. By the time they were locked in his own mind again, he was out of breath, nails gouging the leather under his hands.

He was grabbing the whiskey bottle before giving his body permission. It was at his lips, his stomach churning with fire. Gasping, he broke his seal on the rim and coughed. The bottle had been mostly full… now there was less than a third left.

Griffin’s head dropped back against the leather. “Fuck,” he muttered, still gripping the neck.

He was getting faster at chugging. But that wasn’t exactly a skill to put on a resume.

Once his stomach settled, Griffin lifted the bottle deliberately, and tipped it up.

Finally, the dogs were quiet- lulled into submission by the liquor coursing through his system. The resounding peace in his head had Griffin entertaining the idea of sleep, if only for a few moments. With heavy eyelids, he stretched out his legs and tucked the bottle into the crook of his arm.

Ten minutes, he thought. Just ten minutes…

In the indigo shade between asleep and awake, the dogs jumped the fence. This time however, the whiskey had done its job. His gift was drunk too. It slunk around the hallway, sniffing at the baseboards, tripping along the floor, unsure of where to find another mind to burrow into.

A lazy smirk spread across Griffin’s face. He knew he should tug on the leash before—

“Hey Griffin, you ready to go?” Lisa called.

Too late.

The dogs lapped at the tendrils of emotion radiating from Lisa and chased after them, rolling around in her mind like a soft patch of dirt.

“Son of a bitch.” Griffin pulled himself up, pressing his arms into the tops of his thighs.

Floor boards creaked with each step as Lisa moved closer. A firm knock was followed by, “Griffin?”

Setting the bottle down by his chair, Griffin swallowed hard and shuffled to the doorway. Light poured in from the corridor, blinding him. He blinked, trying not to wince.

Lisa frowned up at him. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” he croaked. Well, didn’t he sound convincing.

“You look like you feel sick,” she said. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” he lied.

The dogs had found a dense cluster of memories and were devouring everything, filtering it back to Griffin in garbled chunks. His head throbbed as he tried to focus on the present situation, and not Lisa’s memories.

“Okay…” Lisa eyed him suspiciously. “Well Boz is done, so are you ready to go?”

Griffin furrowed his brow. “Go where?”

“To Onyx, remember? Tasha said she’d take us all out for drinks as a thank you for today.”

Griffin tried wading through Lisa’s memories to get to his own, but it took too long and she grew annoyed at his apparent lack of recognition.

“You forgot, didn’t you?”

To be honest, he wasn’t sure if he had or not. It was too difficult to tell with her subconscious clouding over his.

“I guess so.” He half- shrugged as he pressed his arm into the edge of the door. Maybe the sensation would help keep him grounded…

It didn’t work.

The silvery tones of remembered voices drowned out Lisa’s as she spoke to him, completely oblivious to the internal battle he wasn’t winning.

No Boz, it’s not that…

“…Now that you’ve been reminded, you should get ready…”

This is different. He hasn’t been the same since…

“…Otto said he’s feeling better…”

He’s angry all the time. He just stays locked up in his room or the study and…

“…And Tasha did offer to buy our drinks for the night…”

Months, Boz! It’s been months. Before, when everything was fresh I could understand but now? He’s not even trying anymore. He promised he would and he isn’t, which…

“...Which is one hell of a thank you in my book…”

We can’t keep making excuses for him! It’s not doing him any favors!

“…So c’mon, get changed so we can go.”

Griffin could only stare. Two very conflicting sets of emotions washed through him- her current perplexed state of concern while clinging to her encouraging exterior, and the acidic contempt from her past conversation with Boz. About him. About Griffin’s constant stumbling failures, as a leader and a friend.

Lisa took a half step closer. “Griffin?”

He swallowed roughly. “I, uh… I don’t think I’m gonna be very good company tonight,” he said, trying to sound as casual as possible. “You guys should go without me.”

Disappointment slumped her shoulders and a gentle frown curved her lips. “But I thought you said you felt fine.”

“Yeah, I…”

No Boz, I can’t.

He cleared his throat. “I don’t really…”

I can’t keep pretending everything’s okay. Griffin’s spiraling. Don’t act like you don’t see it too.

Lisa folded her arms across her chest. “Griffin, what’s going on?”

The silvery tone of Boz’s voice replaced Lisa’s in the memory. What are you saying Lisa? That he’s a lost cause? He’s our friend-

I know that! And this is killing me but-

But what?

But he’s sinking! And if we don’t do something, we’re gonna drown right along with him!

“Well if you’re so sure I’m the fucking Titanic, then why don’t you jump ship already?” Griffin growled, face hardening into a deep scowl.

He realized his mistake immediately, but the damage was done. His heart stuttered as he watched Lisa’s expression twist with pained shock. Her mouth fell open and her eyes widened as she stared up at him.

“What…” She shook her head. “You read me.”

Shame and remorse made his stomach roll. “Lisa…”

“You promised you wouldn’t read me again.”

“I know,” he said. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to.”

Betrayal rushed from her mind to his, caustic inside his skull.

“You didn’t mean to?” Lisa repeated bitterly.

“I’m too exhausted to control it,” he admitted. “Please, Lisa, I’m so-”

Her gaze drifted to the dimly lit room behind him. “Too exhausted? Or too drunk?”

Griffin didn’t have to look over his shoulder to know she was staring at the liquor bottle on the floor.

Fuck.

“I-” He started.

“Don’t.” Lisa cut him off. “I think it’s pretty obvious you’ve decided what’s more important to you tonight. And to be perfectly honest, I’m too tired to care anymore.”

His chest tightened painfully. “Lisa…” he said, nearly pleading.

“You wanna know the truth?” she asked, facing him. “I was trying to convince myself you weren’t a sinking ship. Every day I tell myself you’re trying. That the last few years have been hard for you, and that you’re doing the best you can. And for a while, I think I believed it. I tricked myself into thinking that you care. But really you’re just trying to numb the pain until you can’t keep your head above water anymore.”

Griffin’s insides began to deaden, like frostbite. Hearing Lisa declare what he’d suspected all along released a strange pressure he’d been burdened with for what seemed like ages. Instead of relief, however, he felt isolated.

“Fine,” he said, voice scarily quiet. “Consider yourself absolved of all that disappointment and guilt you’ve been carrying around. Now you don’t have to keep pretending, because nobody will expect you to actually give a shit anymore. There’s your life raft. Enjoy your newfound freedom.”

Lisa’s anger flared and he felt its heat in his core, but she stayed silent. Her glare roamed over his face once more before she spun and strode down the hall. He listened to her jog down the stairs.

Griffin lingered in the doorway. Guilt soured his stomach, made his hands twitch, but his fury combined with Lisa’s was a hard force to overcome. Years ago he would have gone after her, explained himself, tried to repair the damage he’d caused. His feet stayed planted to the hardwood.

He listened to Boz and Lisa’s muffled voices, followed by the sound of the door closing behind them as they left.

And then there was one…

Inhaling deeply, Griffin corralled his gift and tossed it back into its cage, still loopy and sated from the two minds it read. Maybe he’d finally get some sleep.

Clicking the mental lock, Griffin scowled as he pulled the door shut.

“Stay,” he said, falling into his chair and closing his eyes.

* * *

Griffin woke with his teeth on edge and his hands balled into fists. The hair at his temples was damp, beads of sweat trailing down his neck. Bile rose in the back of his throat and he lurched forward, expecting to vomit but it never came.

He usually felt this kind of nausea after reading a Vampire, and he wondered if the dogs had slipped past the gate again.

Hunched over, with his head in his hands, Griffin forced air into his lungs. Deep, even breaths, in through his nose and out of his mouth just like every self-help article about panic attacks had told him. There were no books about being a Seer. Those would have been more helpful than the psychology magazines.

Griffin took another full breath and realized what was missing- pain. The bruises and cuts along his jaw had faded, and his ribs barely ached. His gift had done its second job; it stitched him back together.

His muscles burned with life, pulse beating out a serious rhythm in his ears. Griffin got to his feet, pacing the length of the study in front of the windows. Each footfall stomped in sync with his heart- thunk, thunk, thunk. There was a downbeat when he turned and then the tempo picked up again. A word started to overlay the sound of his boots, thumping louder and louder as he moved. Hunt, Hunt, Hunt…

He gripped a handful of hair and tugged at it until his scalp burned. No matter what kind of advantages he had in the field, Hunting alone was dangerous. If Boz and Lisa found out he’d gone patrolling without them they’d rip him a new one.

Hunt, Hunt, Hunt…

He glanced at bottle of whiskey next to his chair and thought about drinking away the urge- the need- building in his chest.

Hunt, Hunt, Hunt-

The dogs growled and Griffin’s resolve snapped.

“Fuck it,” he muttered and spun on his heel.

He’d deal with Boz and Lisa’s disappointment later.

#Children of Lilith #free fiction #free novels for pandemic times #my work #my writing #original content #original work

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steamishot · 6 years ago

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Mid-May

It’s a little slow at work today and I’m planning on sneaking out early. I think I’m PMSing again. Lately, I’ve been a little overly fascinated by pretty girls on IG/IG influencers and models. Before, I would follow just one group of influencers but now I see so many young, wannabe or rising models on the explorer page. I’m starting to feel old. When I was younger and I heard people just a few years older me call themselves “ancient”, I found it laughable, but I kinda understand what they mean now. Our skin won’t ever be as taut, our minds never as innocent. Our lives as carefree. I think about what I have to offer in my relationship and feel like my partner can do better than me. It’s not good to feel inferior, as that will breed insecurity and damage the relationship, but I do ask myself, when is he gonna stop being a dumbass and realize that? Or can I trick him long enough to trap him? Lol. I learned something new about the culture in china recently. Traditionally, women in marriages are left to manage the household income. The husband would direct deposit his income into the account that she manages. She would give him an allowance/stipend for his basic needs. The idea is that women have best interest in mind for her family, and if guys have too much spending power, he has a higher chance of committing adultery. Women make the initial investment of giving her youth and fertility to the man, and men make the later investment of finances.

Last Thursday, my old boss came into my office at 4:55pm and asked us for the HR director’s cell phone number. It took me by surprise because it was the first time I saw her in our room. I glanced over and she was surprisingly very friendly with me. Her face was notably red. She commented on how my hair got longer, asked me about my job and my recent trip to Japan. I was in a good mood so I was fine seeing her and was proud of her for not brushing me off. It was the first actual conversation we had since I left a year ago. When I left the office at 5:00pm, she was standing out in the hallway just waiting for some reason. Following that incident, I learned that she was going through personal issues. This past Tuesday, I received news that she was admitted to the ER. My work friends were speculating and thought that she might be schizophrenic. They saw her just standing in the hallways blankly staring into space. She had a history of talking and laughing to herself. Before she was admitted to the ER, she dropped the items in her hand while walking and started to shake. Faculty (and the chief) in her division had to come upstairs to HR to seek counseling help for her. I don’t imagine that faculty helping out the admins happens like that often. After more speculation, it just seems like she had a nervous breakdown. Not sure why exactly, but I think it’s because of her demented and aging father (parents live in Missouri).

At age 45, she still depended on her parents to give her money to buy a new iphone. She still expected Christmas presents or birthday presents… and for them to pay for her plane ticket whenever she visited them in Missouri. I told my mom about this and she said that perhaps she’s very financially dependent on her father. If he falls, she falls too. My mom has always been extremely forgiving towards this boss of mine. I think she is grateful for her mainly because she allowed me a job at UCLA. I said mom, she didn’t hand me the job. I interviewed just like everyone else and competed against dozens of candidates. My current job, sure. I was pretty much handed it. My mom always refers to her as a poor girl, and reminds me to be kind to her. When I heard the news of her being mentally off and being checked into the ER, I felt sick. My former coworker talked to me about how upper management knew she had big mood swings and even described her as “bipolar”. It angered her that they allowed her a supervisory position having known that. She brought up how I could’ve made a bigger scene before I quit, and could’ve went to the union for help. And how HR offered me a job to kinda placate me. At the time, I had thought about it, but I remember reading the guidelines of what counted as “workplace bullying” and my experience didn’t fully fall under that. I don’t know if I would have gone to the union, but if that were the case, my name would definitely be tainted and I wouldn’t be allowed to work here again basically. Currently, she’s still in the ER. I’m glad that I don’t have to be careful walking around campus in fear of bumping into her. But I do hope she leaves and doesn’t return (not this earth, just this campus lol).

Matt came back last Thursday and we are leaving to Seattle tonight. Him being gone felt way longer for me than it did for him it seemed. It was kinda hard seeing him have fun all day/travel whereas I was just at work and living my day to day life in LA. When he got back, he said it kinda felt bad/different. He missed having the sense of family like in China, where his family would eat together every day and talk. He said he doesn’t have that here because everyone’s off doing their own thing. It felt a little different seeing him again. I think when you are traveling in a new country, so much goes on and you get to experience many new things. You come back with new learned perspectives. He asked me to sleepover at his house Friday night. I said okay but to get permission from his mom first. He was shy about asking her but finally did ask through text. His mom responded “yes no problem. Should I buy food?”, to which he said no, it’s okay (always denying me food lol). She ended up buying me chocolate covered strawberries, which I thought was really sweet and romantic of her LOL. I didn’t see his mom that night. When I walked into their house, she was not wearing pants and then just went into her room and stayed there the rest of the night. Matt was sick so I brought over ginger and rock sugar to make ginger tea. I was making that in the kitchen with his brother around juicing stuff. It was the first time Matt had a girl over just casually like that lol. His brother is like 14/15 and reminds me of myself when I was his age. He’s pretty talented in art, cooking and general academics. I see why Matt calls him his 2.0 now. If I had a sister 15 years younger than me, damn straight I would train her to be Connie 2.0 too. The sex that night was a lot. After not seeing him for like almost two weeks, I felt shy with him again. He was also extra horny/missed me. The next day, we went hiking. Got a parking ticket. Dropped him back off at home after because homeboy was jetlagged, sick, and sleep deprived and was dying post hike. I brought up how silly he was to have thought we could have gone to Seattle the weekend he returns. I think I learned my role with him. I’m like the practical, cool one. When he comes up with overly ambitious ideas like GOING TO 3 COUNTRIES IN ONE WEEK, I have to shoot down his idea and tell him no. I am glad I shot down his Seattle idea on the weekend he is back. I said, “you get kinda disappointed when I tell you no.” He said “yeah I do. But I’ll get it later.”

The next day was mother’s day. My parents and grandma went to a party. Matt’s mom got admitted to the ER that day. I half joked that maybe I was a part of it because she might have been scared about him getting me pregnant or whatever. He noted that I’m the calm in his life and that his mom “needs a Connie in her life”. Funnily enough, it seems his dad and I share certain qualities. We both like to be comfortable (sleep on time, hike/nature, have a schedule, be early to appointments), we are the less anal ones in the pair. His dad went to China the same week we left to Asia, and he’s gonna stay for like 3 months. I think having both the dad and Matt gone was hard on her.

I told him that due to his mom’s current state, it’s okay if we cancel Seattle. Southwest offers free cancellation and the Airbnb we booked also had a flexible policy, so we didn’t have anything to lose. I also told him that I don’t mind either way because it’s been a lot of traveling for me already- I don’t mind just chilling at home. At least I’d get enough sleep here lol. Also that because he wants to save up money (since he’ll need to pay for rent now), at least not going will save him money. He said thank you to my considerations. He ended up choosing to go. Over dinner on Tuesday, he said the first thing he will do upon receiving his vacation schedule (he gets 2 two week blocks a year, but can’t choose the dates), is book a trip to Iceland for us. I joked saying “where are your priorities?” lol because it seems he hasn’t done much in preparation for the program but yet is thinking about vacation already. Although it did make me happy to hear that. It’s like a placeholder to keep me attached for x amount of time. By Tuesday, I felt comfortable with him again. As he settles in, stops being sick and jetlagged, and his days return to normalcy.

We talked a little about the trip. I noted how it was too much pressure on the one day we had per country to go well and he agreed. I thought he was high strung especially. Hanging out with him at home is normally chill, as I confirmed hanging out with him again. He is NORMALLY easy going and doesn’t have many opinions on the things we do/eat, but traveling with him under a constraint was different. At least we got to learn more about each other. Going to Seattle after work today- semi PMSing. Here’s to round two of traveling! Will try to be rational and think before reacting. Aiming for good vibes throughout.

Clubbing: I went clubbing for the first time in years (minus the times I went just to show my cousins from France around LA). I guess it’s fun getting dressed up and going with a group of girls just taking pictures together and getting male attention. But I was also reminded about how I don’t like clubbing and it’s not my scene. I tend to drink more to feel at ease in those environments. I was DD and drank kinda a lot (my friend said DD stands for ‘drunk driver’ LOL). The club is actually a sad scene for me now. In the restroom especially, you see these wasted girls. On the dancefloor there are dropped drinks. You have all this unwanted attention. Reminded me of the song “crying in the club” – I don’t know the song but I just know the title lol. I remember when I was younger, I used enjoy getting wasted and remembered that girls are usually very supportive in the restroom. People become nicer and friendlier than if they weren’t drunk. It was a fun night- girl bonding and seeing people was a refreshing way to spend my weekend nights haha

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sumergosuigeneris · 6 years ago

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March 15, 2019 Part I

So I’m starting to feel human again.

Pi Day and ‘Beware the Ides of March’ rolled into one.

Because of Wednesday, I felt HORRIBLE yesterday. I stayed home. I actually slept most of the day. I did go out for food. Confession - not a big fan of pop i’s. One, it never feels like anything is cooked long enough (that could just be because I overcook things or like overcooked things), but also there appears to be one or two ingredients in the recipe that don’t sit well with me. I have to look up the recipe, because I have no idea what it is. What I do love is the rice and beans. I like the gravy too. But also, they put butter on their biscuits so that adds a stink. I’ve tried saying ‘no biscuit’ before, but that was too hard for them. Yeah. But the fried chicken breast was quite yummy, as were the rice and beans.

And later, dinner time lol, I ran over to culver’s b/c they were supposed to have cappuccino custard. So...it wasn’t custardy, and it wasn’t very cappuccinoy either. And it wasn’t plain. But! It kind of was like ice milk, and I haven’t had that in a billion years, so that was nice.

But yeah, I mostly slept. A big part because of Wednesday, but I think I’ve needed it for a while.

So today I felt human, but made the mistake of reading an article I *knew* I wasn’t gonna like, because I knew I knew before I read it. Yeah, the answer to how to really define success - your community. I mean, I’ve been looking my whole life, just never found it. I’ve thought I’ve found it a few times, but it was never real to anyone but me. It’s why I’ve been thinking for months about whether or not I should move from my building or part of the city - because I’d have to start over AGAIN.

Anyway, Wednesday.

Not sure where I left off in my normal part of my day, but I’ll just skip to the two important things. I had a therapy appointment. I was 6 minutes late after check-in, and had left all my papers, because I’d actually been focused at work and lost track of time. Boy that was nice. But so rare lately, I wonder if I actually do have ADD or ADHD. Me need more pills.

Anyway, he had had some papers on the desk, and I had a feeling. He told me he’d been dreading this, but his supervisor was making him have me sign an attendance contract. And we spent 15-20 minutes on this. At one point, I did make a snarky comment about how we were wasting my time again. So we went around and around, b/c he said he told (her?) it wasn’t my fault. But you know, he never took responsibility, at least not to me. So anyway this contract. He says I have to sign it, and I say no. I didn’t do anything wrong. He’s been pussyfooting around it, but basically it was sign or you can’t be seen here. So he says he doesn’t know what to do, looking helpless. It’s clear to me that he’s not going to speak to his supervisor, so I say let’s terminate. I’ve never had an ending session before, so I want to do that. We do a little bit about that, but then he steers us back to what happened. So I go through it again. And have to justify why I won’t sign. Again. Since I wasn’t going to get the session I wanted and paid for, I left early. So ridiculous. And you know, he made that stupid comment about ‘enjoying working with me.’ I think they all say that, that it’s just polite lingo they’re all taught to use, but it feels fake and lying and bullshit to me, so I hate it.

Anyway, I felt bad, but not too bad. In a way, it was like a relief. He’s been ridiculous this whole time, and it was not something I looked forward to. I spoke to my work friend, in a generic way. I wonder what she thinks is wrong with me. Does she remember I mentioned I have mental health issues, or does she think I have some sort of cancer or something?

It occurred to me while I was talking to her - maybe he didn’t tell his supervisor it wasn’t my fault. So I think I’m going to send in a complaint. I mean, really it’s not fair. I cancelled with over 48 hrs notice, there’s proof, and I didn’t get around to rescheduling for a couple weeks. So I didn’t miss anything. And it’s not like he couldn’t take other appointments because of me. That’s not how that works.

So I remembered it was Wednesday, and went to the grocerybar. Turns out, I kept missing my bartender b/c she works TW, not WTh. My friend was there, but didn’t remember we’d hung out a month ago. I guess she was drunk. She was talking RHOA and I was excited. At first, she didn’t get me into the convo, so her chat buddies thought I was weird. But then it worked out. And I found out a way to use my tv better. Haven’t done it yet.

I bought two beers. Then bartender gave me a free frozen margarita. I didn’t eat anything b/c cash money issues. But I figured I’d go home and eat. Then she gave me another free one. I had half, then it was time to go. We’d shut the place down. I thought I had a pleasant feeling going on, so didn’t think anything. But it turns out, which I didn’t figure out until I was driving, that I was drunk. I didn’t realize until I was on the road and couldn’t get my eyes to coordinate and see one image. No matter what I did. But I couldn’t stop where I was at. So, I drove fairly slow, prayed to god I wouldn’t hurt anyone (that was about the only not-bad thing about the situation), and got home. I knew, and I know, that that is terrible. I was/am embarrassed to admit it, but this is the one place I force myself to be honest about my fuck-ups as a form of confession (no expectations of forgiveness). Anyway, got home with everyone and myself being safe. Threw up a bit, and zonked out. Felt terrible yesterday morning, and stayed home as said above. But also, I got the throw-up freckles. They were worse than I’ve had before. All over the place, And a stretch across the bridge of my nose that I initially mistook for sleeping on my pillow wrong.

I’m supposed to go out for SPD on Saturday, but now I’d dreading it. I think I’ll be drinking mostly seltzer. And I have to swear to pay better attention from now on, to make sure I’m actually okay. Tuesday was scary as hell, and I’m ashamed of myself.

Oh, and the chicken I pulled out of the freezer so I could cook in my new skillet - went bad before I could cook it. I’m a terrible person.

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dramseysr3 · 8 years ago

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# The Day The Earth Stood Still 1951,Vs The 2008 Version × I remember watching the 1951 version when I was about eight (8) years old. I remember being clued to the television late at night, hoping not to get caught being up so late. I was watching it on Shock Theater; (Scary guy came on in the beginning, ending and commercials:) [He would state, "Close your windows, Lock your doors, and get ready for Shock Theater."] × The black and white, 1951 Version was before it's time. Had a budget of Nine Hundred, Ninety Five (995) thousands dollars: [grossed, one point eight (1.8) million dollars.] For that day, it was a lot of money. The 2008 Version had a budget of Eighty (80) millions dollars:[It grossed, Two Hundred, Thirty Three (233) million dollars.] Most people were looking for a better story line in the 2008 Version. × Michael Rennie, was the leading man in the 1951 version, and Keanu Reeves, was the leading man in the 2008 version. Both actor gave a superb performances in the story lines, they were given: [Both, played: Klaatu.] Leading ladies, Patricia Neal in their 1951 version, and Jennifer Connelly, in the 2008 version. × 1951 versions had a eight (8) foot robot named: Gork. And, the 2008 version had a twenty-eight (28) foot robot, called Gork. They found the person that played Gork in the 1951 version, working as a doorman at the Chinese Theater; (Joseph Lockard, he was Seven (7) feet seven (7) inches tall:) [It was his first acting engagement.] × # 1951 Plot × Alien spaceship landed, Klaatu (Played by Michael Rennie) exited the spaceship. The spaceship is surround by the military, with all their weapons pointing at the ship. Klaatu, went to present a shiny object (that appeared too be, a weapon,) and he got shot by a nervous soldier. × Gork, (played by, Joseph Lockard) a eight foot robot, exited, his visor open, he started disarming the soldiers of their weapons, using a ray where his eyes would of been. Destroying tanks, cannons, and other weapons, until Klaatu stopped him:[Gork, then froze.] × Klaatu, was taken to a hospital to be treated for a gunshot wound too his shoulder (he put some cream he had with him,and the wound healed in one day.) His mission was to talk to all the head of states. He wanted to tell them, if they didn't change their ways, that the earth would*** "be reduced to a burned-out cinder."**[1] × All the head of states refused to meet with him. Klaatu, broke out of the hospital to be among the people. He showed 30 minutes of his power (by cutting the power of anything that used electricity:) [except, airplanes and hospitals.] for thirty (30) minutes. × Klaatu, got shot and killed; Gork, started to activate. Helen, (leading lady: Patricia Neal) had to tell Gork, the famous quote, ***("Gork, Klaatu, Barada, Nikto,")** [2] This stopped Gork, from destroying the earth. Gork then, retrieved Klaatu body, brought him back to life. Klaatu, exited spaceship, and told all the scientists there, his last words of warning. **Klaatu last words of warning, before leaving. ** ***"I am leaving soon, and you will forgive me if I speak bluntly. The universe grows smaller every day, and the threat of aggression by any group, anywhere, can no longer be tolerated. There must be security for all, or no one is secure. Now, this does not mean giving up any freedom, except the freedom to act irresponsibly. Your ancestors knew this when they made laws to govern themselves and hired policemen to enforce them. We, of the other planets, have long accepted this principle. We have an organization for the mutual protection of all planets and for the complete elimination of aggression. The test of any such higher authority is, of course, the police force that supports it. For our policemen, we created a race of robots. Their function is to patrol the planets in spaceships like this one and preserve the peace. In matters of aggression, we have given them absolute power over us. This power cannot be revoked. At the first sign of violence, they act automatically against the aggressor. The penalty for provoking their action is too terrible to risk. The result is, we live in peace, without arms or armies, secure in the knowledge that we are free from aggression and war. Free to pursue more... profitable enterprises. Now, we do not pretend to have achieved perfection, but we do have a system, and it works. I came here to give you these facts. It is no concern of ours how you run your own planet, but if you threaten to extend your violence, this Earth of yours will be reduced to a burned your cinder. Your choice is simple: join us and live in peace, or pursue your present course and face obliteration. We shall be waiting for your answer. The decision rests with you."** [2] × The 2008 version, differences, (1) Leading man was Keanu Reeves. (2) Leaning lady, Jennifer Connelly. (3) Gork, was generated, not human playing the part. (4).Keanu, said the famous phase twice, at the beginning and the end, to stop Gork. But, he said it back wards to sound more alien. (05) Keanu, played Klaatu, his mission was too destroy us or let us live. (6) Gork, appeared to be twenty-eight (28) feet tall. His weapons: Sound, Ray, and it turns into, ***"Microscopic Insect Like Devices."**[3] (7) When, Gork turns into the insects, destroying all the people it comes in contact with, and all structures, but, it leaves the land alone. (8) He decides too release the insects to kill us, then changes his mind, and destroys the insects too save us. (9) The story line left you hanging: [no farewell speeches, nothing .] × If I was going to buy one of these movies, I would buy the 1951 version; ( because the 2008 version was lacking in story line.) × 03/07/2017 17:04 Hrs. × David M. Ramsey, Sr. OCD... × [1]. Quote; The day the Earth Stood Still, m.TMdc.com [2]. ©1990-2017 IMDB. com Inc. [3]. Wikipedia

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