#food theory is so gross sometimes

[theoryandahalf]

I like constantly reminding my mom that if she let me use her resume and steal her identity there would be a small chance I could've had Santi's job.

It's probably like 0.000001% but it would've existed.

IDK, I think you dodged a bullet there.

[maxlarens]

Hi ! As a pescatarian girly and as someone who has recently started to like Lando, I kept thinking about him with pescatarian!reader, because you know opposites attracts and also it made me think of the olive theory from 'How I met your mother', can be fic or smau

(also I'm the anon who requested the Charles fic and I was wondering if you gave names or emojis to your anons 🤔)

ahhh hi😇😇 thank u sm for sending another ask in. verrryy into this! ive never watched himym but i HAVE heard of the olive theory and genuinely think it can be so true. i also think like sharing food/giving certain parts of ur meal to ur partner is so sweet so i loved this a lot🥺🥺

also, tbh i have never had a consistent enough anon to name them/give them an emoji so i would loveee LOVE to do that🙏🏻 pls let me know what i should call u❤️ (and if anyone wants to be a regular/semi-regular anon and give themselves an emoji/name pls do!!!) ANYWAY alright i hope u enjoy— it’s a just a short ficlet 😌💖

LN: quid pro quo

pairing(s): lando norris x reader [read on ao3]

word count: 1.2k

“Eugh,” Lando says, feigning a gag as he looks at the plate of food set in front of you, “That’s disgusting. I don’t understand how you can put that in your mouth.”

Slowly, you raise an eyebrow at him, looking between your plate and Lando’s screwed-up expression; you point at your food, “Salmon? You think salmon is disgusting? Are you joking right now?”

He shakes his head fervently, a grimace still stuck on his face, “It’s gross.”

A laugh, loud and guffawing erupts from your mouth as you realise he’s being entirely serious. He’s fixated on your meal, frowning as if the fish has severely insulted him in some way. Quickly, you clap your hand over your mouth, concerned you’ll offend him if you keep laughing like that. This is one of a handful of dates you’ve been on together— clearly the first you’ve ordered seafood on— and you’re still trying to make a good impression on Lando.

“Wait,” you collect yourself, breathing deeply so you don’t fall into a fit of giggles again, “You’re not allergic are you?”

“No,” he shrugs, “I just hate fish. You’ve never heard that?”

You snort a little indelicately, already going back to eating your salmon, “‘You’ve never heard that?’,” you tease, “Do you think I stalk you on the internet, Norris?”

He grins that small sheepish grin you like so much as a light blush blooms on his cheeks. You’re very fond of him really. He’s cute in a scrappy kind of way; he’s funny and charming, a little bit dumb sometimes; and he’s into you, which is always a bonus. You’re not together— not quite— just seeing each other when you both have time, but it’s been going very nicely if you do say so yourself.

You like him.

He likes you.

Lando rolls his eyes, and purses his lips in an attempt not to let you see the smile that he’s trying to hide, “Don’t you? Stalk me on the internet?”

“Never,” you answer resolutely, thinking blatantly of that night after you’d first met him when you fell down a rabbit hole, spending a good hour watching thirst traps of him on Instagram before coming to your senses, “Not once.”

He hums, unconvinced, “Alright.”

Alright. You make a face, almost stick your tongue out at him but think better of it at the last second. He laughs— giggles— at you. You look away from him, down at your plate, trying to hide the smile that spreads and spreads behind your hair. God, you like him. You’re trying not to let it get away from you. You get the impression that he’s not huge on relationships, and you’re trying hard to be casual about him. It’s difficult— mostly because everything feels so easy when you’re together.

“So,” you start as you push a forkful of salmon and leafy greens around your plate, “Hate to break it to you, but I’m a pescetarian.”

“Um,” Lando asks around a mouthful of half-chewed food, “What’s that mean?”

You stifle a laugh, “Like a vegetarian, but I eat seafood.”

He swallows and makes another face, similar to the earlier one. You can see this is hard for him to process, he clearly dislikes seafood to a degree that you hadn’t quite understood until now. It’s funny. It’s another thing to add to the growing list of reasons you fancy Lando Norris. Though you would think that as a pescetarian you’d want him to like fish, but you suppose by not eating them he’s just saving all the sea animals that you’re not— quid pro quo.

“What about, like,” he waves his fork around, evidently still wondering why you’d eat seafood voluntarily, “just being a vegetarian?”

You shrug, “Vegetables are boring.”

“Right. Better than eating fish though.”

“I like fish.”

He shakes his head, “I don’t get it… It’s— they’re slimy and they smell and they’ve got fucking beady little eyes. It’s not natural.”

“Okay,” you laugh brightly at his despondent expression, “I do need to eat them, unfortunately. Otherwise, I’d probably die of malnutrition, or I dunno, scurvy.”

He groans, hanging his head so that all you can see of his face is that mop of brown curls. You think of your second date when you’d kissed him for the first time in your stairwell and how you’d threaded a hand into it— and they were soft and not heavy with product the way that you hate. The way he’d smelt like expensive cologne and tasted both smokey and sugary at the same time, just like the whiskey and cokes he’d been having at the bar. There’s a soft smile playing at your lips when he finally looks up.

“Does it bother you?” you ask, “That I eat fish.”

He shrugs, shakes his head in a non-committal way that could be either answer and does that little grin again. The one that means he’s going to say something that you’ll find either unbearably cute or embarrassingly funny.

“Yes,” he says, grin not subsiding, “How am I supposed to kiss you when you’ve got fish breath.”

Your eyebrows shoot up and a shocked laugh bubbles from your mouth, you try to ignore the stirring feeling in your gut at the words how am I supposed to kiss you in favour of responding to his lack of tact Try, being the keyword there. It somersaults in your head, how am I supposed to kiss you he said, like he was thinking of doing it again. Which, okay, of course, he’s thinking of doing it again. You understand what this is— but there was an unmistakable fondness there that you just can't shake.

Anyway, you push thoughts of kissing him aside, he’d still accused you of having fish breath, “Wow,” you say dryly, with no malice at all as much as you try to feign it, “You say that to all the girls?”

He blushes, his tan cheeks turning a very pleasant red as he properly realises what he’d said, “Shit. No— oh my god— I’m sorry. I just meant—”

You wave him off, laughing, “I know what you meant. You’re good, Lando.”

“Phew,” he lets out a breath of relief, his nervous laughter punctuating the air between you, without meaning to he says, “God, I thought I’d just fucked it.”

You furrow your brows and frown, confused, “No. You couldn’t.”

You watch him scrub a hand over his face, embarrassed, before it falls away and he gives you a sheepish little grin that says he’s happy to hear that. Toothy, eyes squinted and carving dimples into his cheeks. Your face feels warm and you smile back, biting your bottom lip on the smile so it doesn’t grow and grow to cover your whole face.

Later, after you’ve finished lunch and spent too much time talking over a too-sticky table in your favourite pub, Lando kisses you up against a tree in the park by your apartment. You put your hand in his soft curls and you smell cologne and taste what he’s been drinking as he presses his tongue into yours. The coarse hair of his moustache brushes against your lips and you kiss back with equal gusto. You pull away when it feels like you two are veering into too inappropriate territory for this public park. He chases you, but you laugh softly, pressing a perfunctory closed-mouth kiss to the corner of his mouth. He groans, laughs, and puts his forehead against yours.

You hum, “I guess my fish breath doesn’t bother you so much, huh.”

“Fuck,” he breathes, “You’re never going to let that go are you.”

You shake your head ever so slightly, “Not as long as I live, Norris.”

[demonslayerunhinged]

*cw: this theory deals with child sexual abuse and has mentions of suicidal ideation and eating disorders.

*If you or anyone you know is going through this, you can find resources here, here and here as well as a list of international hotlines.

Obanai is probably the second most hated character in the fandom, and just like Sanemi, he’s one of the most misunderstood. I think the hate he gets from the fandom is unwarranted; he’s accused of being a dick, a horrible person, a simp and a character who only exists to be Mitsuri’s love interest. All of which is unfair, sure he’s prickly and unapproachable, but he’s not as bad as the fandom makes him out to be.

So, in my quest to draft a defense for our favorite snek boy, I reread his backstory and in doing so, I realized something sad

Unhinged theory

Obanai is a sexual abuse survivor

Let me explain:

Obanai’s backstory and aspects of his character mirrors that of someone who’s been through sexual trauma. The evidence I'm going to present is a combination of my own knowledge about these matters and information I got from forums and websites for male survivors of sexual abuse. So let's examine them...um spoilers

The snake demon

I believe that the snake demon is a metaphor for a sexual predator. Her inclusion in the family could also be a metaphor for how these predators insert themselves into family units-or most of the time are family members themselves-and abuse the children for years and even generations. Obanai's relatives sacrificing their babies to her could signify the real life actions of families who are unaware or, turn a blind eye to, or sometimes actively participate in the abuse of their children.

The sacrifice in exchange for wealth speaks of how families in real life ignore the abuse of their children to maintain the wealth and status they obtain from being related to and associated with the abuser.

Even her decision to wait, ordering the cutting of his mouth so he would look like her, could be interpreted as her 'grooming' him in a sense.

Even her design has a certain sexual, predatory aspect to it that's different from the other demons.

His relatives

Obanai describes his family members as being 'disgustingly' affectionate and bringing him lots of 'greasy' food that made him sick. Food in media is often used to depict love, affection, connection and sex, and Demon Slayer is no different.

There are plenty of instances where food and the giving of food has been used to denote friendship (Tanjiro giving Zenitsu, Inosuke and Genya meals in an attempt to bond with them), connection (Giyuu wanting to give Sanemi ohagi), love (Tanjiro's love of cooking and the satisfaction he shows when his meals are enjoyed by others) and pleasure (Mitsuri's large appetite). I'll make a post about this later.

With this context, we can interpret their bringing of rich foods, their overbearing attention and affections as them objectifying and even being sexually inappropriate with him.

The sexual abuse

Non-physical.

The first instance of abuse is non-physical, but that doesn't make it any less important. Being constantly visited by the snake demon in his room at night, Obanai described his feelings of terror, being paralyzed and watched. His body would break out in a sweat, and he would be unable to fall asleep.

His descriptions of the experience and his body's reaction to it reminded me of some survivors' stories I read, where they talked about how in the initial stages of the abuse or when the abuser was first introduced into their lives, their abuser would give them unwanted attention, would stare at them in a way that felt creepy, gross and wrong.

Some had their abusers come in to their rooms, maybe under the guise of 'checking in on them'. They described feeling terrified, freezing up with the hopes that the attacker would leave. Some would take measures such as sleeping with the door locked or with a heavy object against it, sleeping with a sibling or parent, sleeping in a hiding spot that the attacker knows nothing about or not sleeping at all.

Physical.

The specific age that the snake demon plans to 'eat' Obanai is never stated, but from what we've seen so far and in the sexual context, we can assume that she's waiting until he hits puberty. Some studies state that the average age of victims of female sex offenders usually falls around 14 years, but there are cases where the female predator waited until their victim reached sexual maturity before they carried out their abuse, like in the case of Mary Kay Letourneau. Here's a video that breaks down an interview she did before her death.

Obanai was 12 when he was dragged out of his cell to be subjected to what I believe is the first physical abuse. He had his mouth slit from ear to ear, with the blood collected and fed to her. The snake demon decided to have him live a little longer, which again, fits into my theory of her wanting to wait until he reached puberty.

Bodily violation, violence and blood are common allegories for sexual assault used in media and in Obanai's backstory we see it being used when his relatives drag him from his cell, literally pin him down, cut his mouth and feed his blood to the snake demon. The act of feeding on his blood could also be a metaphor for the snake demon sexually abusing him.

His escape and the resulting fallout

Obanai managed to escape, and although he was tracked down by the snake demon, he was saved by Shinjuro Kengoku before she could kill him. His cousin's response was to blame him for all that happened, asked why he ran away, and said that he should have 'allowed' the demon to eat him.

This could represent how some victims are rejected, ostracized and criticized for speaking out against their attacker, exposing the abuse to the public and getting help. Their families would say 'you should have just let it happen', 'you destroyed the family', 'why did you run away, tell people?' and place the blame on the victim.

Obanai's reaction

There are three aspects of his characterization that are similar to the common reactions noticed in adult survivors of sexual assault, especially male survivors.

His appearance.

His behavior.

His beliefs.

His appearance

Obanai has a small frame that he hides with his baggy uniform and haori. I can tell it's baggy compared to that of the other slayers because of the width of his pants vs the width of his lower legs. Desexualization or hypo-sexualization is a common response among some survivors of sexual trauma, this usually involves wearing clothes and taking measures to make themselves look 'unattractive'.

'But this side feels more comfortable for me, like the baggy clothes I wear, which hide my body, and the long sleeves which reach past my wrists. I promised myself no man would ever touch me again, and whether it was a moment of triumph, or a moment of defeat, I still don't know.'

'I'm thin, shy. I seem easy to dominate. I've grown a beard. That's helped a little. I dress in baggy clothes, covering as much of my skin as possible. That makes me feel safe.'

This not only helps regain a sense of control and power over their body but also serves as a protective measure against sexual advances so they don't get abused again.

In Obanai, given his history of receiving unwanted, suffocating and 'disgusting' attention from his female relatives, it would make sense that he would want to dress in a way that makes him unapproachable and hides his body from the opposite sex. We can see his attempts to desexualize himself in the picture below:

His behavior

'Iguro has difficulty with girls. Due to his experiences growing up, he was unable to conquer his fear and animosity. Plus, the firls who joined the Demon Slayer Corps often put on brave faces because of their sad backgrounds, so he felt sorry for them, making him uncomfortable in a different way.' - Taisho Whispers, official English translation.

'Iguro-san isn't good with women. Due to his upbringing he has a fear and disgust towards women. (I couldn't overcome it easily. The women who joined the Demon Slayer Corps have painful stories of determination. I felt sorry for them and I didn't get along with them in a way that was different from the way I got along with my family)' - Taisho Whispers, direct-sort-of-shitty translation via Google Translate.

Male survivors who were victims of childhood abuse by female perpetrators often talk about how the abuse greatly affected their relationships with women or lack thereof. Some going so far as to say that they became afraid of women, being around them and how sometimes being touched by women would trigger panic attacks and remind them of the trauma.

Here are some quotes posted in a thread on the Male Survivor forum. Full thread here.

'Once that happened, my genophobia became more intense. I couldn't ware short trousers in summer, could never go swimming, got paranoid if I touched a woman's arm or even brushed against one, would always stand at a distance from female friends, and would literally leave the room if anything explicit was discussed.'

'I have started to have strange, deep discomforting feelings as I remember some of the assaults and I have gotten to a place where touch from a woman makes my hair stand up, makes me nauseous, and gives me chills and feelings of dread.'

Obanai has similar responses when he finds himself in proximity to women. We're only told about it in the main manga, but it's shown in the Gakuen. I know the Gakuen takes place in an alternate universe, but aside from the events, the behaviors of the characters are based on their actual personalities in the main manga, so we can safely say the reactions he displays in the Gakuen is canon to his character.

His beliefs

Adult survivors of sexual abuse often struggle with feelings of guilt, rage, and shame. In the manga, Obanai talks about being held back by the decaying hands of his family members, which could represent the long-lasting effects of sexual abuse and how some survivors carry these burdens all through adulthood or throughout their lives.

There's also the thoughts about himself that echo the heartbreaking thoughts shared by some male survivors.

Guilt:

"As the member of a filthy family, I too was corrupt. My sins were deep, so I could not live a normal life"

Rage:

"With no other outlet, I turned all my rage on demons in a grudge of intense hatred. By risking my life for others, I felt as if I could in some way become a slightly better person."

Shame:

"Unless I die and come back in a different body in which this filthy blood does not flow, I have no right to be with you."

Suicidal ideation(mild):

"By risking my life for others, I felt as if I could in some way become a slightly better person."

"I want to die defeating Muzan." (He's the only character that I know of that outright says this.)

He also kind-of expresses his feelings of being weak during the fight with Muzan:

"I've accomplished less in this battle than anyone! I wish I could deliver a more effective attack."

While this quote isn't exactly definite, a feeling of being weak, or being 'less of a man' is also a common experience shared by male sexual assault survivors.

The scar and It's symbolism

The scar is a physical manifestation of the lifelong effect that sexual abuse has on its victims and the stigma it carries. For Obanai, it's not just a painful reminder of the trauma he suffered at the hands of his family, but also a reminder to him that he's like his attacker, the snake demon. The bandages he wraps around his mouth symbolizes not just his attempts to hide his trauma, but also his inability to talk about it due to shame and fear, which is unfortunately an all too common experience of male survivors.

Another struggle survivors often experience is with intimacy, romantic relationships and sex. For Obanai, I believe that this struggle is represented by his eating disorder. The link between food and sex is a well established belief in many cultures, people with large appetites can be seen as having equally high sex drives while people with small appetites have little or no sex drive.

As he grows older, his little appetite is basically him curbing his growing sexual desire, which he sees as ugly, like the scar on his mouth. But the thing is Obanai wants love, he wants to love and be loved, to be intimate with another person, but he feels he doesn't deserve it, after all he's filthy, shameful and probably a predator just like the snake demon. So he starves himself, suffering in silence with the belief that he was disgusting, that no one would ever love him, that he was destined to and deserved to be alone.

Then he met Mitsuri.

In Conclusion, Obanai is way more complex than the KnY fandom gives him credit for. This is a man that went through immense suffering, and it's really sad to see people hate on him because he isn't 'nice'.

Well, that's just how life is. Trauma doesn't exactly make nice people. We can't all be like Giyuu or Tanjiro(bestest boy ❤), a lot of us are like Obanai, Sanemi, and even Shinobu, a lot of us are angry, and why shouldn't we be?

...

*Phew, ok so this one has been in the drafts for a while because I was scared to post such a dark subject matter and also I needed to be really sure I wasn't just talking out of my ass but after rereading his backstory and analyzing aspects of his character, I'm more confident about this.

[siblingskissing]

Ronance headcanons?

Ronance Headcanons

I have had the BIGGEST brain rot about these two, you guys don't even know, so please excuse my rambling session in this post. As always- feel free to share your headcanons, opinions, thoughts ideas, just be kind <3

-Robin is the biggest simp to ever exist. Nancy mentions liking a color? Guess who's suddenly adding it all over their wardrobe! A favourite food? She's already learned how to cook it. Allergic to something? Robin will destroy it with her bare hands and make it go extinct to protect her girl.

-Likewise, Nancy would and will kill for Robin (come on Robin tell her to kill for you she wants to)

-Their favourite dates include them sitting in one of their rooms, a movie or music playing as they discuss conspiracy theories or whatever story Nancy is working on

"There's been a ton of missing items from farms in the areas. Animals, tools, bales of hay-"

"could it be aliens?"

"Alie- Robin it's not aliens!"

"What? Interdimensional monsters are real but aliens aren't?"

-Many people assume Nancy would get annoyed by Robins carefree joke centered attitude but actually she calms down whenever Robin tries making jokes.

-She doesn't like when people don't take things seriously, but she knows Robin is taking it serious, but using humour to make sure they don't spiral with the problem

-their relationship definitely started off rocky but with some time, understanding and surprisingly really deep conversations they learn to appreciate the little things about one another.

-Robin loves Nancy's drive and her leadership skills. She makes sure that everyone takes her seriously and if the kids complain about Nancy being a hard ass she brings them back to listen.

"Nancy's not our boss!"

"No, but she's the one keeping you dipshits safe- she knows what she's doing so listen up and quit complaining"

-They kids listen to Robin more and so when she follows Nancy with no complaints, the kids unconsciously follow suit.

-When Nancy gets stressed/aggravated Robin will be there to lend her a shoulder. They're very much leader/Right Hand man coded to me.

-Nancy doesn't know much about queer culture so when she does eventually come out Robin is happy to talk to her about it and share what she knows.

"So we use Blue violets because Sappho used to describe women wearing garlands of them,"

"Sappho?"

"... Do you have a spar 3 hours so I can explain Sappho and Greek poetry to you?"

-They take all kinds of cute little Polaroids that they keep at Robins place

(examples of said Polaroids)

-Robins family is more supportive so often Nancy goes over there to spend the night

-when college comes up in discussions Robin mentions that she enjoyed investigating with Nancy, the research was fun when they didn't have death looming over them.

"Yeah, learning Russian to break the code was awesome- the torture kind of ruined it though-"

"The WHAT?"

-Nancy asks Robin 1000X if Robin is sure she wants to go to the same college/same field and Robin promises her that she isn't only going because of her.

"I'd follow you anywhere, but this is also for me- if I have to do one more customer service job I might kill someone."

-They love movie nights, curled up under a blanket watching whatever film they can find. Robin always finds the oddest ones and sometimes some really deep indie films. Nancy also enjoys the foreign films she can find and let's her choose.

-on nights Nancy chooses- she likes care free fun films. Nothing too heavy because she likes the simplicity

-Theyre a gross matching couple- but in a new fun way.

-Mat hing colors in their respective styles, using each other's clothes and making it go with their personal choices, matching patterns/designs.

-They also shared shoes sometimes

-On the 90s Nancy gets a more "Rachel from friends" style like this

-Robin eats it up like no one is watching and often has to hold back from just kissing her 24/7

(also I badly wanna do a look book of the characters so Please someone ask for that because I love fashion)

I definitely probably have more but here you are!!

[operation-cursed-sweet-tooth]

I also am on the "I dont wanna say it was another penguin potentially turned evil but Herbert doesn't seem like the most plausible target." . . . It's just.. a gut feeling ya know. Herbert's too easy to blame. . Besides. I could be remembering wrong but it looked.. eaten? per se. If you get my drift. Herbert is still a vegatrain for as much as I know.. he wouldnt. I could be easily looking at the wounds wrong but.. I dunno. I dont even wanna think about that.. anymore.. than i have to.

Good point… I almost forgot about that detail- he brags about it so much I’m not sure how I could forget…

Oh please- that bear lies! Like a lot- he definitely eats meat sometimes the liar-!

Dot… he’s a vegetarian- not to mention he gets grossed out at the mention of meat I’m sure-

Still accusing him anyway- he’s a polar bear- the most dangerous type of bear! He could switch up if he oh so felt like it and rip us all to bits-!

I’m with Ace here…. It’s too easy to just accuse our biggest enemy on the island of such a thing just because we dislike him… for all we know it could’ve been the crabs- but of course I’m not going to spiral down into making up theories…. That’s just ridiculous

You’re both just going against me now- how rude!

I’m with Ace on this too- why would a vegetarian like him want to straight up kill another for food… when he’s grossed out by the stuff? If he wanted meat there’s plenty of fish he would’ve gone for…. Doubt he’d harm a crab due to Klutzy’s sake…

Herbert is still a meanie…. But I dunno what to think…. Everything is just spinning… can’t think at all….

If it is another penguin…. We need to be careful about it…. Anyone can end up being just as sleazy as that bear… and that includes going out of their way to harm… they can act innocent all they wish but can easily use that to take advantage of one or all of us to get their way…. If Klutzy is able to do that, so is anyone else on the island-

Yeah, Klutzy is a special case and all, but he’s a sneaky fella. He’s managed to slip past me and Gary before cause he pulled the whole innocent act…. Only exception is during the winter when the little fella needs in here for warmth…. Herbert is usually too sleepy during that time to really do anything bout it

Wait Herbert’s a vegetarian…? Doesn’t that just mean he eats only grass or something….? Or is that vegan-

Rory- dear…. That doesn’t mean he’d eat just grass-

I thought it did-? What’s it mean then…

[creature-wizard]

The importance of separating belief from practice from economy when criticizing spirituality

I notice that a lot of people who want to criticize harmful expressions of spirituality often conflate the beliefs and practices of those spiritualities together, rather than separating them and asking themselves which one is harmful exactly, and why.

Sometimes, both practice and belief are harmful. For example, going on a highly restrictive detox diet because it will supposedly rid your body of toxins put into regular food by an evil conspiracy. There's no evidence that detox diets actually work as claimed (and if they seem to, it may be that you actually have a food allergy or intolerance, and you feel better because you happen to be cutting out that food for awhile), and they can actually be very harmful. Meanwhile, this sort of conspiratorial worldview has roots in old antisemitic conspiracy theories used to justify violence against Jews in the past, and today, justify queerphobia and ableism by way of suggesting that an evil conspiracy is putting chemicals in our food and water that turn kids gay, transgender, or give them ADHD, autism, or whathveyou.

But other times, it's not quite so simple. For example, let's look at modes of faith healing that hold that you should eschew evidence-based medicine in favor of praying and getting right with God. Meanwhile, studies show that people who rely on faith healing don't exactly have a great recovery rate. Many children have died from treatable diseases because their parents were taught that sickness was a test of faith and God would damn them for seeking conventional medicine. (Can you even imagine how terrified of eternal damnation you'd have to be in order to watch your own child die in agony?)

If we look at most people who believe in prayer, we can see that most of them don't agree with this extreme position. Most people believe in prayer and evidence-based medicine. If anything, prayer gives many people a way to feel like they aren't just sitting around doing nothing while their loved ones are in the hospital, and that itself is arguably beneficial.

Now, if you personally have trauma connected to prayer, or just don't find any meaning or satisfaction in prayer, then it's fine if you don't want to do it. But that doesn't mean it's appropriate to tell everyone else that they shouldn't do it. When you do this, you're just using your own personal feelings as a moral compass, and as we know from observing the "thinking about gay sex grosses me out, therefore it's unnatural and against God's will" crowd, that's no way to go.

So how about beliefs and practices used to extort people? For example, energy healing services often come with steep price tags. But let's be real, so does evidence-based medicine in places like the US. This clearly does not mean people should just stop seeking evidence-based medicine. It does means that we drastically need to change the system, so healthcare is more accessible. Additionally, if there's one thing I've learned from researching alternative medicine, it's that practitioners are more likely to actually offer something for patients' complains, rather than telling them that it's all in their heads or that they need to lose weight. This doesn't mean that an exploitative alternative industry should be allowed to exist, of course. But it does mean that we need to understand how prejudice among doctors fuels it. Moreover, I think we can agree that someone who watches energy healing videos on free YouTube after they've done all they can from an evidence-based medicine standpoint, or offers free energy healing sessions to friends who are in the same boat, are not in the same category as scam victims and scammers.

So yeah, when you're out there criticizing harmful forms of spirituality and religion, remember to separate practice from belief from economy and examine each one separately and in terms of how they connect to each other and to larger issues, rather than putting it all on blast together.

[dianaladrislovebot]

gone headcanons that have popped into my unhinged little brain, part 6

hey there, so since i’ve been rereading the series/writing this fic i’ve had nothing but hc/theory brainrot so you’ll only be getting hc posts for a while. we’ll be back to our regularly scheduled program of incorrect quotes at some point i promise

this first (technically first two) hc isn’t something i induct into my thinking all the time it’s just a thought that i enjoy no matter how sad it is

caine’s parents had always struggled with having children, so they ended up adopting caine instead. they moved to london (where caine’s mother is from) for a few years because they feared connie, who was still young, would come back for him. he slips into a british accent sometimes when he’s angry (i just think this sounds funny can you imagine british caine)

caine’s mother fell pregnant a few years later and they managed to keep the baby. the second the baby, named chloe, was born, caine was sent to coates immediately so they could focus on doting on their “real” child. now that they had a biological child, he was rendered useless in their eyes.

astrid has scary good skin care. girl has never had a pimple in her LIFE.

since they lived together (+ sam) post fayz, diana helped astrid write her book. astrid only knew so much from her point of view, and diana helped her fill in the blanks from the other side of the court.

caine’s a ridiculously picky eater. he will push his food around and make sure none of it touches before he’ll eat it. very particular about what he will and won’t eat. this is because he’s ridiculously autistic.

also hates crust. diana and drake used to take turns eating his crust at coates

alternatively, sam is a human vacuum. he will eat quite literally anything you put in front of him because and i quote, “food is food”.

drake is afraid of butterflies. he thinks they’re gross. i have no basis for this ink and i just think it’s funny

caine’s favourite colour is yellow. him owning that yellow vest was not a coincidence.

alternatively, diana’s is a royal purple and drakes is (suprising no one) red.

caine is super squeamish, despite his constant need for war. hates blood, hates all kinds of bugs. he took one look at that’s bugs face during the bug battle in plague and was ready to book it.

drake really wanted to die in a super fucked up and for his case to go unsolved so he could end up on buzzfeed unsolved. he was disappointed when he realised his immortality probably prevented that.

drake’s a complete feral in snow. he absolutely adores snow. it’s the only time anyone sees him act like an actual well adjusted person (sort of). he turns into an excited child when it snows

[gatekeeper-watchman]

Good Morning World The News Media is Thriving These Days, But…

The news media is thriving these days, alive and well with its many commercials, political propaganda, gossip, sports, and, relatively speaking, minor news events—and, oh yes, commercials. From our very beginning, “Freedom of the Press” has been a major contribution to the safety, welfare, and protection of the people from the errors and sins of government, but real in-depth reporting is slowly disappearing from the scene. Daily news events are reported over and over, sometimes for days, while other important subjects are overlooked. We are majoring in minors and minoring in majors.

For example, where, today, are the pros and cons of single payer healthcare being discussed? Certainly, this subject is being discussed superfluously, but where are the in-depth pro and con discussions? Most of what I hear about the subject is, to the effect, “No need to discuss this as it will never be approved anyway”. Oh well, healthcare is only 17.5 percent of our spending nationally, annually contributing to our national deficit and debt. No problem.

Ref: http://www.justfacts.com/healthcare.asp

The financial crisis of 2008 was triggered by derivatives, one of those new securities invented to allegedly provide insurance coverage to home mortgage holders, aka fish food for speculators in the financial markets. I don’t really know how many dollars’ worth of these securities were in circulation in 2008. I have heard numbers like $400 Trillion. I have also heard numbers amounting to $900 Trillion. What are the numbers now, and when is our illustrious media going to reveal them to the people. The last time I heard anything in the mass media about the derivative risk was an article by Peter Cohan, AOL.COM, Big Risk: $1.2 Quadrillion Derivatives Market Dwarfs World GDP. Folks! Do you know how much money $1.2 Quadrillion is? Let me tell you. It is $1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000.00 or 1,000 times $1 Trillion. My gosh, folks, the world’s annual gross domestic product is only $50 to $60 trillion, and this article was written June 9, 2010—over six years ago. Oh well, that wasn’t important either. The public wouldn’t understand anyway.

Let’s really get basic. It’s common knowledge that education in government, and civics has been lacking in our school systems in recent years. Yet our government from the president on down and the news media, when they address the people, they refer to members of the House of Representatives as Congressmen (or women). They are not Congressmen. Their titles are Representatives. If they are a congressman, so also is a Senator by gum and by golly. Congress is the name given to our national legislature, a bicameral body made up of the House of Representatives, the lower house, and the Senate, the upper house. To be a congressman, one would have to be both a Representative and a Senator at the same time. Duh… By the way, do you want to know why we have two houses? In short, the answer is the lower house, the House of Representatives represent the majority of the people, the masses who elect them. There are 435 members. The Senate, the upper house, represents the minority elite among us, in theory at least. There are 100 of them. I say elite. In our nation’s beginning, Senators were elected by the House of Representatives. Only later in the course of our history where they were elected by the people as they now are. For further information:

http://www.sfgate.com/politics/article/Enduring-debate-elitism-versus-populism-3189454.php

To close, for now, our news media exists to serve our people. They have to earn income to pay their bills, i.e. salaries, insurance, rent, and return on investments to their investors, but their main purpose, their only purpose which, in the end, justifies their very existence is to serve the people with news which is the truth; and, in my view, they could do a much better job. This is my view. What’s yours? Saturday, October 19, 2024, Jacksonville, Florida USA From: Steven P. Miller, @ParkermillerQ, gatekeeperwatchman.org  TM ‎Founder and Administrator of Gatekeeper-Watchman International Groups. #GWIG, #GWIN, #GWINGO. www.facebook.com/gatekeeperwatchnan www.facebook.com/ Instagram: steven_parker_miller_1956

[quillpokebiology]

hey for. no reason in particular. can i get some facts abt phantump and/or gastly

-@old-chateau-dweller

Phantump because I only do one pokemon at a time, and I like them better

Phantump Facts

(Art by JamesTurner_42 on Twitter)

-Did you know Phantump is one of my favorite ghost types? Anyways, real facts now

-The scientific name for Phantump is "Pueri Lignor" which roughly translates to "Child of wood"

-Phantumps are able to posses all kinds of tree stumps, like oak, birch, redwood, etc. The ones that posses deciduous trees are said to be the most deadly

-I'm sure everyone is aware of the legend saying that they're the souls of children that have died in the woods. What do I, as a researcher think of this? I don't know. There's a lot of evidence to support that theory, and it wouldn't be the first time something like that happened. But all of that could just be a coincidence

-Even if this theory is true, Trevenant are still able to breed (Phantump too, but that's creepy and gross as hell when you think about it, so I'm saying Trevenant). So that doesn't mean that all Phantump would be born from a stump

-They're known to be very hesitant to leave the woods, but can be lured out using candy, stuffed animals, or games

-While not proven, one research says they found a ghost/poison Phantump variant, with the Phantump having mushrooms all over its stump (//idea from Tofrug's Swamp. You can look them up to find other cool fakemon!)

-Including cries, Phantump are also good at mimicking other forms of human speech

-There have been multiple cases of children going missing, and then a Phantump appearing at the houses those kids lived in days later. A lot of the families end up catching the Phantump or letting them stay with them since they believe this is their kid

-There have been multiple instances around the world where Phantump would go out of their way to play with young children they found. However, if it's a wild Phantump, this isn't a good idea as they're known to get children lost in the forest

-Phantump will usually gather around a Trevenant for protection. If you see a Phantump, there might be a Trevenant nearby as well

-While a lot of people assume thaat you can take off Phantump's stump, the stump is actually attached to their body, and attempting to take it off can really hurt them

-Their organs are incredibly light to hold and also feel a bit weird. It's hard to describe. They look almost transparent, and they don't have the same bodily functions that we have. For example, they don't poop or pee their food out. All kf it seems to just turn into energy (no I didn't kill a Phantump, it was a surgery, and he's doing fine right now)

-Unlike a lot of other grass types, they can't and don't photosynthesis. For one, the stump they inhabit is already dead, so it can't. Two, they dont like the light anyway, and they prefer to stay the shadowy dark lasts of the forest

-Phantump are shown to really like Shuppet and Bannette. In many instances where they were being studied together, or put in close proximity, Phantump would always run over and try and play with the Shuppet or Bannette. For some reason, Phantump hatched from eggs don't always react like this

-Phantump become a lot less shy during Halloween and sometimes even go trick or treating with the young children. People in Kalos always saw this as a good sign since Phantump are said to protect the forest

(Art by rosevolii on Twitter)

[dissociacrip]

it's dysautonomia awareness month 💙 and while what i have (POTS & NCS) are common conditions, here are some things i feel don't get talked about enough

(NCS = neurocardiogenic syncope; it's sometimes also called vasovagal syncope, vasodepressor syncope, reflex syncope, and neurally-mediated syncope)

disclaimer - i'm a layperson, if any of this information is actually incorrect please let me know ASAP!

1. coathanger pain

coathanger pain is a symptom associated with orthostatic intolerance in general, not just POTS, but it also has yet to be extensively studied/fully understood

it's called "coathanger pain" as it occurs in a "coathanger" shape affecting the base of the neck and spreading into the upper back and shoulders, in my experience it's a searing pain that's simultaneously icy (like the icy-hot sensation you might get when sticking your hand in front of a hot tub jet) and becomes excruciatingly painful the longer i'm upright, it's also been described as a charley-horse sensation

the theory behind it is lack of sufficient oxygenated blood flow to the muscles in the upper body; without enough oxygen, muscle cells use fermentation to produce ATP, which triggers the production and buildup of lactic acid, causing progressively worsening pain

this likely happens because the autonomic mechanisms implicated in POTS and other forms of Ol fail to adequately counteract blood pooling in the legs and feet against the pull of gravity, resulting in decreased blood flow to the upper body

2. POTS is a heterogenous syndrome

what defines POTS is an HR increase of at least 30bpm in response to postural change (getting into a standing position), typically in the absence of orthostatic hypotension, which is something that can happen for a variety of reasons

idiopathic/primary (where the case isn't known) POTS is not uncommon, but not all cases of POTS are idiopathic and are instead secondary to another condition, such as those that involve damage to the peripheral nerves (e.g. diabetes and diabetic neuropathy)

some people recover from POTS if the underlying issue can be resolved, but in many cases it either can't or the underlying issue is unknown

there are "types" of POTS (hyperandrenegic, hypovolemic, neuropathic) but these aren't distinct subtypes so much as mechanisms that can be involved, which means some people can experience multiple

this also means that POTS has a wide range of presentations: some people may recover, some people will have mostly steady impairment with more of a relapse-remission pattern based on various factors, and some people become sicker over time if the underlying cause is progressive

3. how "pre-syncope" works

syncope = fainting

pre-syncope = symptoms that lead up to fainting/the "podrome" of syncope (e.g. lightheadedness, sweating, stomach discomfort, etc.)

"pre-syncope" is generally used to refer to the cluster of symptoms one experiences as a result of POTS regardless of whether they actually lead fainting, not everyone with POTS is considered a faint risk

personally i am a faint risk but i usually only faint due to exacerbating circumstances (hypotension triggered by heat or lack of food, etc.) & not necessarily POTS by itself (i usually have NCS in response to getting blood drawn)

i can usually tell i'm actually going to faint based on tells like profuse sweating and the gross feeling in my stomach, but for example i can be on my feet for hours with progressively worsening ataxia that never lead to me blacking out (assuming that's due to my POTS and not something else Imao, the jury is still out on that one)

other people experience a similar situation where their symptoms are still considered "pre-syncope" even if they never lead up to actual syncope

4. convulsive syncope

convulsive syncope is a "type" of faint episode that can externally resemble a seizure due to jerking body movements, but isn't actually a seizure (it's also different from PNES)

unlike seizures, convulsive syncope is usually very short-lived (usually less than 1 minute) and has rapid recovery once adequate blood flow to the brain restored, however - while i'm no expert - i think it's fair to say if you think someone is having a seizure it's better to assume that's the case & respond appropriately

faint episodes (convulsive or no) can still be a pretty serious thing due to the risk of bodily injury, especially TBI

sources/further reading

about POTS (dysautonomia international)

coathanger pain (the dysautonomia project)

convulsive syncope (medlink)

[janisbuggybones]

---->An explanation of the story I want to tell<----

---->Nothing goes right and the everlasting need the characters feel to just be happy is never fulfilled, or maybe it is?

---->The only person to see this is my best friend because it started out as a role play thing but further into it I realized this was the story I wanted to tell.

--->Not one where Janis is a gangster volleyball player that has it all and so much more to the point its sickening.

---->Not one where Janis dies via suicide and reincarnates fresh as new the next day.

---->Not one where Janis is so disgustingly gross to the point I wonder what the hell was wrong with me.

---->The story I'm meant to write is one similar to Owari no Seraph, in its complicated and has tragic history but also to Noragami, in that it has a hierarchy of humanoid gods and the main characters dont want everything, just happiness. But it's neither really, because the story I want to tell is named "Apples and Bugs" (working title idrk) and under the cut is an analysis and further explanation towards everything that want to happen.

First, as spoken by the former archangel Luca, now a fallen angel.

"Yep. She was Adam and eikko was Eve and they were the beginning of humans. I'm sure if it wouldn't kill eikko, I could make her remember that far into her past." He said "but anyway, earth started out as it's said in textbooks, evolution and all that stuff led to dinosaurs. But then the gods popped into existance to earth and wiped out most life to make it more advanced with the introduction of humans. The God of God's, amaryllis, made Janis from her own rib and then eikko from Janis' rib to make who Christians know as Adam and eve. Though this happened hundreds of times as they kept dying and dying, until they accidentally created vampires and magic, which allowed Adam and eve to survive finally." He said

___________________________________________________

To start, Janis is Adam, a man born near Korea when the earth was in its beta stages, meaning the little islands that make up Japan are on the continent of Asia currently. Eikko is born what would be called Japanese today and so Is Janis, though in most of her renditions, she's Korean.

The reason planets and everything are there is because of just suddenly the universe imploded sometime and made everything (following the big bang theory I guess). That included the God of God's, Amaryllis, who was born from an incredible supernova bringing a being of pure energy to sentience.

She found earth and decided to have some fun because at this point, she had been alone for aeons upon aeons. She sees the beginning stages of earth, bacteria and mostly water, and sees it as her canvas. Under her watch, the world evolves like in most textbooks, up until the dinosaurs, at which she wipes her slate mostly clean to make way for none other than all the Adam's and Eve's. Then she expirements to keep her creations alive longer, and incidentally creates magic and vampires. Adam is able to drink blood to keep himself alive and Eve can turn her energy into magic that can make sustenance, making a small food chain. It took a few incarnations before Adam realized he needed Eve to survive, instead of drinking all her blood right away. This built their relationship as Adam dependant on Eve, leading to all future vampires treating women like goddesses because Eve helped vampires thrive in their early days.

___________________________________________________

"The top 10 gods did similar expirements all over the world and it culminated in the birth of multiple civilizations all over the world. Janis lives on for longer than eikko as she eventually dies as a human. Janis then killed herself and they hit their first reincarnation. The gods were shocked at this, but watched in happiness as the sentience they made turned out to be just as complex as their own. I was born around that time, made out of janis' pure anguish as she realized eikko wasn't with her anymore. They called me an angel and told me Janis was my duty so I was to watch over her and observe for the gods." He said quietly "I was so young, and my body was so pure then....." he said softly

___________________________________________________

Amaryllis then made gods from supernovae she herself caused, with her infinite energy source and the 10 most powerful were made to start civilizations, allowing for diversity. This ended up in 1/5 males being vampires and when mated with human women, they had a 1/2 chance of having vampire babies. This grew the populations around the world of both humans and vampires.

During all this growth, Adam witnesses his Eve die before him from old age. As he had grown dependant on her, he felt so angry and sad that he couldn't handle it and killed himself.

Now our narrator, Luca, was born from this anguish as a innocent babe. The gods hadn't expected the pure anguish of a being other than them could have produced a winged creature such as luca, but went with it, making Luca the first angel (but not really considered an angel until he did a holy deed, further mentioned ahead). They assigned him to watch over Adam for research but not to intervene in what they carry out their human nature.

___________________________________________________

" Skip ahead a few hundred years, we had castles with elevated magic and a semi sophisticated society. That's when geo was born half spirit, with half of a seemingly random spirit in him to keep him alive. This spirit was me, or my human version, because appearantly I was human before angel. That human had a weak body and died in childbirth, growing up in the spirit world as a scared boy. Eventually, geos parents found the spirit and he wanted to be alive again so he agreed, giving up a chance at reincarnation to keep geo alive." He said quietly

___________________________________________________

Hundreds of years later, they end up in the time of castles and kings, the renesaince. This time, we shift to Geo Archviste, the prince of lady Shiromiya, Lady Sonneto, and His highness, Sir Pierre de Archviste. Selen is a spirit and she made love with Pierre, resulting in a baby with half the spirit needed to keep a baby alive.

They scoured the spirit world (a separate pocket space where all the spirits slip into and roam until their eventual reincarnation or damnation after being judged by Pierre) for a spirit willing to take on the noble task and Luca's human spirit was chosen to keep the boy alive. Now Luca would be permanently an angel, unless he were to fall and become a demon in hell to assist in punishing the bad spirits until rehabilitation for reincarnation.

___________________________________________________

Its oki sorry i kinda worried you///

"That deed was perceived as noble by a god and then I was made into an angel without a spirit. Then time went on and Adam and eve reincarnated. Eve was now eikko and Adam was now a young man named....it'd be disrespectful to say....he was born in what is now known as Korea as a vampire, and lived on feeling strange." He said

" He eventually found out the cause of this feeling was his body, feeling jealous of women and their beautiful bodies. But then as he thought more, he began to understand it wasn't just their bodies, he had more of the mind of a woman and understood then that he was born in the wrong body. Her life continued as she traveled and understood her condition further, taking her name from one of her slain vampire brethren, Janis foster. She moved more into Europe before being slain by the church that had established there. She was then reincarnated in the vampire world, a world made akin to the spirit world but for the protection of vampires. She became their princess before fleeing for the human world."

___________________________________________________

Adam and Eve are reintroduced again, now reincarnated as Eikko and **** ***. The latter is born into a male vampire body while Eikko is born a woman.

As **** *** goes on, she finds herself through her adventures and is included in many battles, taking the name of one of her honorable vampire friends Adam was **** *** and now she's Janis Foster.

Janis went through her travels, traveling more inland, until the church killed her. The church had a weak understanding of the real god(s) and reasoning behind everything and thought vampires to be hellspawn, so they embarked on crusades against vampire kind, leaving tension and vampires to go into hiding.

The vampires had fashioned a spirit world like pocket space on earth just for vampires out of a collective pool of hundreds of individual magics, and Janis ended up reincarnated into it and was made their princess. By this time, she had found a way to give herself a womanly chest via magic and it greatly helped her self and Public image but sadly nothing could be done for her lower parts because of the complexity of the organs. She was accepted as a princess, but vampires only have princesses(queens really) to well (mainly rule) have children as vampires are way less fertile than humans and it takes a lot to successfully have a child, let alone multiple.

She felt wrong getting someone pregnant just because she was told to and the amount of red flags was forehead high for her and she didn't like anything about the vampire kingdom so she fled.

___________________________________________________

"She then became a knight for the first kingdom willing to take her in and from there on, accomplished many feats such as ending entire wars with just her own hands and holy sword. She was then sold to the renku kingdom to pay off their debts and assigned to look after eikko, now reincarnated as a princess. After that, they eventually fell in love with eachother and met geo, who they then fell in love with as well. But their relationship wasn't perfect, as it slowly degraded from Janis and geos obsessive nature's." He said

___________________________________________________

Janis took on her persona of a knight and as he said, accomplished many feats, such as ending the great ogre war, ending territorial disputes with the great forest fae (a more talk it out kind of thing but it was serious. Wars were planned), and stopping the senate of her kingdom (the Regulus Orchid kingdom), from waging war against 4 powerhouses in the kingdom economy they had going on that would ruin the peace of the entire continent.

But her usefulness outlived her, as she was sold to the Renku kingdom to pay off their debts. She was worth about $5 million in usd now, but 6,000 gold coins back then. A coin for reference could get you dinner and lunch for 4 days.

She was assigned to protect Eikko Renku, the kingdom's princess on her travels to find a suitable husband across many kingdoms and eventually they fell in love.

--> some more juice to this part, a suitor came to her kingdom and acted like your typical man at that time, misogynistic and coddling. He ended up sneaking a team of assasins in somehow and tried to ambush Eikko in the courtyard, but Janis easily slain all of them. However, it's revealed later that Eikko had died and Janis traded the souls of the men she slain for Eikko to come back. She was lucky and toyed with the kingdom of hell and all souls to bring her crush back because she thought she was really cute. She's a person who doesn't think much of her actions, and would have done it for anyone but not cared of the result (most times a no), but for Eikko, she pleaded with her all to bring her back to life. It brings back into light the original Adam and Eve relationship, with Eikko as Eve and Janis as Adam. (She's a vampire still)

As stated before, vampires are naturally submissive to human women, and Janis had been extra obsessed with eikko. Geo had too, but his love wasn't in his genes, he genuinely fell into extreme love for both of them. This led to roughy patch upon roughy patch as Janis slain Eikkos entire previous kingdom by letting a Mimic into the castle grounds.

A mimic is a waterborne shape-shifting creature that favors humans. They are animalistic and kill and feed upon those that treat it with disgust. It can't talk understandably except to those who it blesses with its friendship, such as Eikko. She eventually came back to ker kingdom slain and finds the Mimic but befriends it before Pierre euthanized it humanely, as they are incredibly dangerous. Looking back, he felt bad, but he had a kingdom to protect, he couldn't take the risk of it escaping the castle.

___________________________________________________

"Eventually geo decided it would be best if they started over and poisoned all three of them, hoping for a new life together. But only eikko and Janis died, because geo was immortal but though the poison would work. He was left alone for hundreds of years before meeting Janis as an alchemist, who then helped him to bring eikko back, at a cost." He mumbled

"Janis ended up dying, but eikko was now in a fake body that was nearly completely human. Geo and eikko were together again but now they needed Janis. They found her a few hundred years later as a vampire oni. They were finally back together but happiness was short lived as about a hundred years later, janis and geo were kidnapped by a devil that wanted to try and use Janis' blood to manufacture a plague that would destroy the God's expirements."

___________________________________________________

Geo had found their relationship beyond repair and found a poison said to kill immortal beings such as himself and vampires. He then had all three of them take it to try and get them to reincarnate together, but it backfired as you could tell. It couldn't kill immortals, just vampires because of it vampire warding toxins, and humans because of their low immunity to the chemicals in the poison.

He went on, grief-stricken and obsessed with getting them back. He managed to get Eikko's soul contained and works with alchemists across the globe, looking for a way to bring Eikko back. He then comes across Janis, now an alchemist that was trying to find someone to fund her rebirth studies, and they worked together. They made the first synthetic human body and brought it to life, at the cost of Janis' life.

Eikko then lives on with Geo until they find Janis a few centuries later as a vampire oni now. She's rude and brash, but they end up making her fall for them and go back to her mostly complainant and nice personality that they fell in love with.

They were like that for a bit, before eventually, Geo and Janis were kidnapped for about 13 years by a devil trying to wipe out humanity.

___________________________________________________

"It didn't work and eikko moved on as she was left alone for over a decade. But Janis and geo eventually escaped and got back together with eikko only to find out she was with someone else under the pretense they were dead. This led Janis to try and become a god to protect them and keep them all safe, but it backfired and she received a holy punishment. She watched eikko and geo die before her eyes before staying chained up for over a millenia."

___________________________________________________

Janis and Geo are eventually able to escape, but by then, she had moved on on the pretense they were dead. They try hard to salvage the relationship but Janis (driven a bit mad by the torture) sees Eikko's new boyfriend as an enemy and evil so she gets rid of him and goes through with the ritual to turn into a god, made by her previous research as an alchemist, in an attempt to protect her loved ones.

It backfired too, and she ended up watching Eikko and Geo be slain in front of her before she was chained up for a millenia. During this time, Luca re-appeared and committed a grave sin: don't communicate with those on the living plain. And he was descended from heaven, his angelic body very slowly degrading without the support of the heavens.

___________________________________________________

"Then we're brought to your last reincarnation. You two found Janis and lived out a normal life with her for the most part. Until you two died of old age and she killed herself to with you two. Then I made her cult, to bring her power and help her thrive as a god. You and geo were born into the cult and you know the rest by now right?" He asked quietly

___________________________________________________

Then their latest reincarnation, they have near happiness, but leave Janis behind, more detailed in (blurb link here). Luca makes a cult after Janis to give her power that she can one day use to reinstate him to heaven. Now that's probably all lol. Idk I'm writing this on one huge hyperfixation rn lollll

[servin-up-surveys]

survey #236

Do you live somewhere where it’s completely safe to walk alone at night? Okay so our development is pretty safe, I see people walking a lot, including around dusk, but our city itself is deplorable. It's known for crime.

Would you rather be able to talk to animals or be fluent in every language? Talk to animals. I feel like talking to animals (if people believed I could actually do it) could change the world.

Does your kitchen have a pantry? No.

What are some foods you enjoy cooking? I don't enjoy cooking.

Have you ever interviewed a job applicant at your workplace? I've never worked anywhere long enough for this.

Did you ever skip class when you were in school? If so, was there a particular class that you skipped the most? "Yeah. I don't really recall skipping individual classes, though. If I was absent, then it was for the whole day." <<<< Exactly this. I didn't have my own car to drive somewhere and I wasn't just hanging out/hiding somewhere on campus.

Are you high-maintenance? God no.

What was the last non-fiction book you read? I have no idea, non-fiction isn't my thing.

Are you able to crack any of your joints? My big toes crack sometimes, but I don't deliberately try to crack joints, the sound grosses me out.

What’s something that’s been on your mind a lot lately? How the hell to get out of this anhedonia sinkhole.

What was the last thing someone asked you for advice on? Uh... good question.

What’s your opinion on lottery tickets? Waste of money, or no? Waste of money, mostly. I don't really have much of an opinion if you snatch one once in a blue moon, but certainly don't make a habit of gambling.

Do you have any upcoming plans with friends? Not right now.

What was the last picture message you received, and from whom? A picture of my cat from Mom.

Have you ever swam in a saltwater pool? Yes, while in physical therapy.

What kinds of leisure activities did your family do together when you were growing up? Swimming in the pool is all I can think of. It was very rare BOTH my parents were in the pool, though.

Do you know anyone who works at McDonald's? Not that I know of.

Have you ever been to a sports game? I've been to I think three Carolina Hurricanes (hockey) games with my dad. It was a bonding thing for us.

Have you used a sewing machine before? No.

Have you ever gotten in trouble for using a phone in class? No, because I didn't use my phone in class.

Have you met any of your second cousins? I... don't think I have.

Is your computer slow or fast? It's fast.

Have you ever faked sick to get out of something? Yup, I definitely did this for school.

Have you ever been ice skating? No.

When was the last time you wore a skirt? Holy shit, probably not since I was a kid.

Have you seen all the Shrek movies? I've seen the first three. I WANT to see all of them, I just... haven't.

Have you ever fainted? Yes, resulted in a terrible concussion and broken molars.

Do you have a job? I don't. I don't think I can maintain a job, especially lately.

Are you the type of person who gets injuries often? Proper injuries, no. But I HAVE noticed I stub my toe A LOT. I think I round corners of any kind too tightly or something.

Have you ever finished a whole video game? Oh, plenty. I've been gaming since I was a tiny kid.

If so, which one(s)? Too many to list.

Are your siblings allergic to anything? I know Nicole is allergic to latex.

Do you know anyone with a pet snake? Myself, lol. Mazzy has a snake, too.

What are some of your comfort foods? Ice cream, as well as just fast food, sadly. I hate how much I love fast food.

What’s something that’s very popular, that you have no interest in? Starbucks is one, for sure. Coffee in general. Pumpkin spice is another, since that's coming back up lol.

What’s something that many people would consider to be lame, but you don’t? Even if I don't believe in them, I love learning about conspiracy theories.

How would you describe your clothing style? Lazy. Comfortable.

Do you typically respond to text messages right away? Yes. If I reply to a text late, I was almost certainly asleep.

What has been the highlight of this past month? Honestly, nothing. This has not been a good month.

Has anyone ever assumed you were flirting with them, when you weren’t? I don't know.

Did your parents spoil you when you were a kid? My mom certainly tried to, but we weren't rich by any means.

Would you rather watch a movie in the theater, or at home? At the theater, by far. That's an experience I enjoy.

Did your parents teach you how to make a budget before you moved out on your own? I haven't moved out.

How is your boyfriend/girlfriend doing? He's fine.

Do you have anything to pay off? No, it's not like I have money to buy things to begin with.

Would you sacrifice yourself for a friend? It depends on the friend.

Have you ever watched a needle go into your own skin? Yes. This used to totally not bother me, but now I don't really like watching especially long needles go in.

Have you ever seen someone get a piercing/tattoo? Both, yes.

When you're done eating finger foods, do you usually lick your fingers? I do.

[TW: ABUSE] Do you know someone that is/was abused by their parents? Yes.

Would you cuss the person you hate the most out to their face? I wouldn't invest anymore energy into her than I already have, I wouldn't waste my time trying to communicate with her ever again.

Abortion: murder or it's fine? Abortion is completely fine and saves potential children from situations no child should be in.

Do you know someone that is mute, deaf or blind? No.

Have you ever spent more than two weeks in a wheel chair? No.

Do you drink straight from the bottle, instead of getting a cup? No, I live with someone else who might drink that thing, and what if we have guests that also might want something? I find this so gross if there's even a chance someone else might want it.

Have you ever been in a taxi? No.

Does weed smell good? Or no? What I've smelled smells awful.

Are/were you loud in class? Absolutely not.

Last thing you yelled at? Our dog, she's been barking her brains off at everything lately and it's been driving me insane. I yelled because I was all the way in my room TRYING to sleep.

Is your car a piece of crap? It hasn't even run since June, so...

Would you have a long-distance relationship with the person you are with now? Yes, because we've already established a strong relationship. I don't know if I'd START another long-distance relationship, but it's different to me when you've seriously dated three years already, I'm not going to break up with him just because of separation for whatever reason.

Who was the last person to make you really mad? REALLY mad? Hm. I don't know.

Where is the last place you had sex? Sexual stuff, in my bed.

Who is the last person you had sex with? I haven't had actual sex for reasons I can't fairly shame my boyfriend over (even though I do get frustrated, but not really at him), but we still do plenty of sexual things, so basically him.

Do you enjoy watching porn? I've literally never in my life watched porn and have zero interest in doing so.

What’s your favorite drinking game? I've never played a drinking game.

Do you cry often? Dude, I have cried SO EASILY lately, even easier than normal. It's like ANYTHING makes me cry lately, it's been embarrassing, even if it shouldn't be.

Are you a big flirt? No.

What would you do if you became pregnant? Get an abortion immediately.

When did you last make out with someone? Was it good? I don't like getting grossly specific, not long ago, yes.

Do you like your body? Hell fucking no.

Did you get lucky on prom night? I was abstinent at that time, so...

Are you normally a horny person? Not more than what I'd assume is normal for a sexual person.

Do you live with your biological mother? I do.

Have you ever tried peanut butter and bananas together? Yes, in a sandwich. It's okay.

Do you believe in sex before marriage? I think it's fine to do.

Do you know anyone who married their high school sweetheart? Multiple people.

Orange or apple juice? Orange.

Have you ever seen anyone die? Only animals. I've seen a woman hours before she died, but not as she did. That alone made me cry so fucking bad, I could NOT handle it. I very barely even knew this lady, I was just visiting with my mom.

What things are you interested in that you study or read about on your own? Meerkats, learning the German language, photography techniques, Rammstein history and stuff.

Would you ever creep into the subway tunnels to go exploring? No, I'd be too afraid of meeting dangerous people.

Have you ever given someone a love letter that you wrote? I've done this for multiple people I've dated.

What changes are you afraid of? I am terrified beyond words of my mom dying.

Have you ever wanted to be an actor/tress? No.

Where do you want to be in 5 years? I want to have an income, hopefully living with Girt, I want my mental health to be in a good, stable place.

Get anything good in the mail recently? A BOOK, FINALLY!!!! Plus Girt's anniversary present.

When you see a stranger on the street does your first reaction lean towards thinking of this person as a potential friend or as a potential threat? In general, potential threat. You can certainly seem less scary than others, but still.

Who was the last person you cut out of your life intentionally? Probably some old friend on Facebook.

Do you eat live fish? I don't eat fish, period.

Would you get engaged right now? I would if Girt asked, but honestly my preference would be we live together first.

[the-autistic-agoraphobe]

Autistic April Day 6: Textures I Hate. 

There are a few things that I hate the texture of and can't stand to touch. They include powder, chalk, marshmellows, some fabrics, wigs and some toys.

I don't like the feeling of talcum powder so I don't use it unless I have too but sometimes I need to use it so I wash my hands and put on moisturising cream afterwards.

I don't really do much with chalk but once at work I was doing some chalk drawing with the residents. (I work in a nursing home) My supervisor was kind and allowed me to wear gloves while I did the activity.

I don't like touching marshmellows because they're all powdery but I still like to eat them so I stab them with a fork and put them in my mouth.

I can't stand to touch or wear certain clothes because they are stritchy scratchy. I remember years ago my schools sport uniform had some terrible shorts that I had to wear and I hated the thing. This was back because I knew that I was Autistic or about Autism. If I would have known about Autism back than I would have asked my mum to ask the school if I could wear a different pair of shorts while doing sports. A few years ago I ordered a squid game tracksuit online for me to wear on Halloween. When it arrived I discovered that it was a different texture to what I thought it would be so my mum helped me to resell it on Facebook market place.

I can't touch wigs or wear them they gross me out. When I signed up to partake in the school musical in 2013 I had to make sure that I didn't have to wear a wig while performing. The good news is that I didn't have too. However I don't have any issues with my own hair. I had a wonderful time participating in the school musical. I have attached a photo of me wearing what I wore at the school musical to this post. I felt comfortable with what I was wearing.

I can't touch some toys which includes Barbie and Bratz dolls. I think it's because their hair feels the same as wigs. I was part of the Bratz generation and all of the girls were playing with Bratz while I was playing with beanie babies.

Image Descriptions:

1: This is me on the night of the musical in my kitchen. I was a 17 year old white girl with long dark brown hair tied up in a high ponytail. I am wearing a black ribbon with dots of various colours wrapped around my ponytail and tied into a bow. I am smiling and I am wearing blue eye shadow and red lipstick on my lips. I have a light green scarf tied around my neck. I am wearing a white buttoned up shirt with a collar but no sleeves.

2:There are a list of prompts for each day of the month for Autistic April. The top and bottom of the image is light purple and the middle part of the image is white with black text on it. The black text says "Autistic April 2024 Prompts: 1: Special interests 2: How you found out you were Autistic 3: your favourite stim 4: alternative forms of communication 5: your favourite fidget toys 6: textures you hate 7: safe foods 8: other disabilities you have 9: LBGTQI+ 10: childhood special interests11: comfort items 12: your favourite Autistic celebrities or characters13: unmasking 14: sensory aids 15: misdiagnosis 16: Autism friendly places 17: Disability support you have received 18: animals 19: favourite thing about being Autistic 20: echolalia 21: idenity first or Person first language 22: the spoon theory

23: colours that represent Autism (not blue) 24: Autistic owned small businesses 25: meltdowns and/or shutdowns 26: Your clothing prefences 27: Self care 28: Relatable Autism memes 29: Accessibility 30: routines" There is an infinity symbol that is half red and half gold on the top right corner of the white section. End Descriptions

[divorcedkitchen]

where do babies come from?

I’ll get to the insults later. Let’s make some curry.

Rinse and drain a can of chickpeas. In theory you could start this with dried beans and soak and cook them etc, but who are we kidding? You also need a small can of crushed or diced tomatoes.

You’ll need about half a big onion, a couple of cloves of garlic, and an equal amount of fresh ginger. You’ll want about a third of a lemon.

If you have access to an Indian market or a grocery store with a good Indian food section, buy a masala blend in a small format*. Since we’re making Chana Masala today, that’s probably the one to go with. We’re talking about a blend of dried spices here, not a jar of salty sauce. Gross—and expensive. You’re likely going to want to try multiple different blends over time. Don’t buy them all at once: spices lose potency faster than your lonely ass can use them.

There’s a metaphor in there.

You can also do this analog if you have a few more spices at your disposal. For chickpea curry, start with ½ teaspoon of turmeric, 1 tsp garam masala, 2 tsp coriander, ½ tsp cumin, 1½ tsp Kashmiri chili powder.  (Don’t substitute this for other chili powder. It’s relatively mild and smoked without being cloying. You will likely wind up using this on all sorts of other things. Try it on eggs, for example, or potatoes.) And then salt to taste (3/4 – 1 tsp most likely).

Then also some kasuri methi because you want this to be awesome. Kasuri methi is a dried loose leaf. Being a herb (like you!), loss of potency is much less of an issue. Where I buy it, it comes in a big bale of cellophane, and it absolutely looks like shake. Remove the label from the cellophane and unbutton your shirt down to your belt. Put on sunglasses and parade the kasuri methi around your living room like a weed dealer in the 80s. Make sure your dog knows that this is your corner. Bitch.

Get some oil (or ghee) hot in a pan at a tick below medium. Add the onion, diced, season with a bit of salt and cook until golden.

Meanwhile mince the garlic and ginger until its basically a paste that smells like you have been wasting your life until the very moment you smelled it. Lower the heat another tick or so and add the garlic and ginger. DO NOT BURN IT. Just cook the raw out, max 1 minute.

Now add the masala and stir everything to coat. Getting really dry in that pan! Is this a cause for concern? It is not. Your kitchen (or the back of your red 1999 Pontiac Sunfire—I don’t know your life) smells pretty incredible right now. Add the chickpeas and tomatoes and stir. Raise the heat back a bit and add a cup of water. Bring it back to a simmer and let it go, partly covered, for 20 minutes or some shit. Depends on the heat and how thick you want your curry. The point is you’re almost done.

Once it meets your approval, test for seasoning. Remove from heat. Cut the end off a lemon and squeeze the juice into the curry. Take about a twoonie-sized pinch of kasuri methi and crush it in your palm. Add that to the curry and stir.

Oh man, you really got something here.

Let it rest a bit and then eat it with whatever you want. Air-fried supermarket samosas are good. Rice makes enormous amounts of sense. Your hands. Idgaf.

Leftovers will be even better.

*Sometimes, paying more on a “per 100g” basis is more economical. Yeah, you can save theoretical money down the road by buying the big sack, but dried spices lose their potency after a few months—even if you store them properly. If you’re throwing them out in a few months because they’re flavourless, you’re just throwing away your alleged savings, and probably more. Cooking for one BLOWS. These micro-inefficiencies are baked into every decision you’re going to have to make in your kitchen. Shit just more expensive for you now. Sorry.

[secretariatess]

13 and 16 for the Royal OC asks?

13. Is there a famous ancestor they look up to? One they would rather not speak about?

16. What are some duties your OC is expected to perform? Military service? The bestowing of honours? Attending the monarch at large events?

Crown Prince Arvek: 13. Queen Alestra, who was a major force in expanding Harlofelp's trading capabilities and establishing the kingdom as a trusted trader with the foreign country Foralt, across the seas. The northern kingdoms were not able to establish the same rapport. As for rather not speak about, King Eleston. Eleston was third in line, but his brothers before him mysteriously died. Eleston reportedly spent most of his time drunk, made all six marriage vows only to turn around and break them all, would only listen to his people if they brought him food and then demanded that they be jailed if he determined the food gross. It's only scratching the surface, but Eleston disgusted Arvek.

16. He is expected to act as advisor to the king, and king's proxy when/if needed. His word overrides that of the lesser princes, granting him the ability to "correct" misguided governing decisions made by them. Military service is not required of him, though military strategy and fighting are. There are some honors bestowed by the Crown Prince, though they play a minor role next to the king's honors. There is an expectation that the Crown Prince will attend large events, though it is not as egregious if the king is present. If the king is not present, and there is no political motivation in not showing, then the Crown Prince is expected to be there to act as proxy for the king.

Prince Selim: 13. He looks up to Prince Hulian, of whom little is known about him. He had learned all kinds of parlor tricks, was able to steal the earrings off the ladies in court, and vanished when a war broke out, with some theories claiming that Hulian had become the infamous Red Mist, a myth of a man who went behind enemy lines to steal plans and kill major political figures pushing the war. He despises King Arvellian, his grandfather, whom he's convinced hated him.

16. At this point, no one expects Selim to perform any duties, considering how many times he's skipped out on it. He's supposed to watch over certain provinces given to him, and oversee projects the king places him over, but Selim's convinced his younger brothers do that for him. Like Arvek, he is not expected to actually be part of the military, but strategy and fighting is taught to him. Learning to fight was one of the few things he enjoyed about his position. His presence at large events is not as crucial, and sometimes his father wishes he wouldn't show up at large events.

Prince "Cor" Corian: 13. Cor doesn't really have an ancestor he looks up to. He's more in the present of things, so he's more likely to directly relate to those around him. Which right now, goes between Arvek and Selim. As for those he doesn't want to talk about, he'd probably say Eleston like Arvek, and he does have some negative things to say, but overall, he doesn't care. He doesn't need to care.

16. He has the tasks of governing the provinces he's been giving. Since he's still pretty young and just coming out of university, he hasn't done a whole lot just yet. Military expectations are that of his brothers, and it's an honor to have a prince at large event, particularly when royalty isn't expected, and he might be sent here and there for political purposes that don't require the grand gesture of the king or Crown Prince.

Prince Veran: 13. Like Cor, he doesn't necessarily have an ancestor he looks up to, but not because of the same reason. Veran finds interesting facts of his ancestors, liking the ones he likes for various details, though not necessarily making a role model out of any of them. There isn't an ancestor he wouldn't talk about, unless it was a boring one who didn't do anything politically or even have a funny quirk or story to tell. There are some that he doesn't care for because of what they did, but he's largely detached from their stuff.

16. He is still going through university, so he does not yet have the tasks Cor has. Rather, he is training to learn how to govern. He is still learning strategy and fighting. His appearance at large events is much like Cor's, where a gesture could be made, but not as important.

Thanks for asking! ^_^

[lifewithoutmeds]

july 17, 2023

quick recap of last 10 days: saturday, july 8: brunch with amy. cried. facetime therapy with kelda. cried. lorena’s bday surprise. held it together. reyna was kind enough to invite me and 7 of her friends/plus ones and we surprised lorena for her bday/welcome home at a localish bar. i held back tears but tried to engage as much as i could. limited success.

friday, july 9: dinner with steven. we cooked meats; he was particularly fond of the pork jowl, thankfully, as i had a whole package of it. he brought some soju and some other plum wine drink and he listened to me cry and was a good friend and promised that we’d see each other on wednesdays when we were both in office.  sunday, july 10: considered going to church but then just slept and stared at my phone all day. tuesday, july 11: met up lorena at BJ’s for some happy hour beers and mini pizza. saw my waitress crush. cried a little.

saturday, july 15: managed to leave the condo to go hang out with amy at her house for a few hours, maybe like 1:10pm-4:30pm. we caught up and i tried to engage with her kids but they’re kinda tiring and didn’t seem particularly interested in engaging with me either. left to go to the pacoima costco where i got gas, toilet paper, eggs, and bottled water, and had my toilet paper and eggs stolen out of my cart while i put condiments on my hotdog. costco quickly replenished my stolen goods when notified, but it made me pretty sad and disappointed with the state of the world. sunday, july 16: slept for 12 hours. stared at my phone for 12 hours. ate a frozen pizza and then puked up some of it at night. monday, july 17: tiny tiny steps. texted amy and tracy throughout the day. chatted with lana for a bit on teams. tried to do a little work. did a few loads of dishes, and took out some trash and recycling. was able to walk to ralphs and buy a few items: items for cauliflower dip, a gallon of vinegar so i can clean some things. an onion. made some cauliflower dip, rinsed the cauliflower, and ate some cauliflower (health). also talked to rhiannon for a bit as we laid out our camping plans (for this friday-sunday), read a chapter in my book on borderline personality disorder, and now am journaling, so today was my most productive day in a week.

it’s such a weird sensation to feel ... so heavy, so unmotivated, so listless, so bored. the only thing i kinda appreciate is eating. like i enjoy craving a food and then thinking of how i can like satisfy said craving. i went back and forth with tracy last week on pizzas, and really considered going someplace to satisfy my desire for pizza, but laziness and cheapness caught up with me so i ended up getting two reduced/clearance frozen pizzas at ralphs and eating them over the next three days and they were gross and made me feel terrible. but sometimes i’ll think mm, prime rib sounds good. hwedupbap sounds good. i haven’t gotten as far as acquiring said foods, but it’s nice to at least have desire, in any form.

another weird thing is how i’ve gotten so addicted to my phone, even though nothing in/on my phone particularly entertains me. but it’s like i can’t tear my eyes away. FORTUNATELY i’ve stopped watching police body cam and otherwise shaming videos on the youtube and started watching more “Try Guys” and like the hot wings eating challenges. i find myself watching a lot of clips from The Office, Parks and Rec, Friends, the Big Bang Theory, and weirdly Young Sheldon (all this just pops up on facebook and i just watch.) i guess it’s a positive development that at least my mind is gravitating more toward light things rather than the worst of humanity. i should be receiving my DVD’s this wednesday so i can more mindfully tune into my tv shows.

i feel like i’m at the bottom of a very big hill. a mountain, i guess. every step is hard and feels heavy and the mountain seems very big and unsurmountable and i kind of don’t quite get why i even have to climb it, but i do for some reason. i know i need to “do the work.” i know i need to figure this out, somehow, for some reason. i guess. finding motivation is hard. but every minute spent not staring at my phone i guess is a tiny tiny victory. i know that i need to stop sleeping away my problems and stop wasting away my life, but ... but it feels so hard. tracy asked today, whether i might not benefit from a healthy diet and exercise? granted, i can see how eating frozen pizzas and sleeping all day long would Not benefit me in the long run, but it’s just kinda wild how when you’re as depressed as i am, that literally feels like the only thing i’m capable of. and though i can understand conceptually how a walk might feel good, or getting groceries to make a nutritious meal might benefit me, it’s soooo stupidly hard to just get any momentum whatsoever.

i hope today was momentum. 

week ahead: tuesday: hoping to do a little laundry and gather up some items for the camping trip. wednesday: in office. thursday: happy hour with danielle friday - sunday: camping in french camp with rhiannon

i’m mildly dreading camping because it’s been so hot lately, and sometimes it’s hard to do things, like meal prep or clean up, and i’m a little nervous that i won’t have fun because of the way i’ve been feeling lately and i don’t want to sort of ruin one of the only things that’ve made me feel better in my life, but also, i’m telling myself that it’ll be good to be out in nature, to not stare at my phone, to focus on something outside of myself. i’ll bring a couple books and try to do some fishing. i hope it’ll be okay.

mood: 2.23