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a-hazbin-reader · 10 months ago

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Alastor X Reader Headcanons

✅️Romantic

❌️Platonic

TW: Extreme Fluff!! Sweet Intimacy!!! A little canon cannibalism

Description: Different ways Alastor likes to be pampered by Wifey!Reader

When it comes to his wifey...Alastor is super spoiled and he knows it, craves it like nothing ever before

He's a glutton for your attention and everyone knows it

Every little act of kindness, every drop of affection and loving gaze just melts over his (shriveled black)heart like a sugary glaze

Mmmmmm glazed hearts

Great now he's hungry

ANYWAYS-

Even the normal everyday things make him feel warm and fuzzy inside

Like when you bring him his favorite tea in the mornings, giving him a soft kiss on the side of his face as you drape your arms around him

"Mm...good morning my dear..."

Or when you smooth over an unruly hair for him or fix his bow tie before he leaves the hotel

You can't have your snookums going out looking like some scruffy strawberry clown

You always make sure his staff is clean and polished, suit flawless and pressed, shoes shiny before he has an overlord meeting

You're NOT going to let your pookie bear hang around the other overlords with smudged shoes

Just. No.

Loves the days that you drag him off to the bathroom to coax him into a hot bath

"You've been so tense lately... let me take care of you..."

How can he say no to you?

He just relaxes and closes his eyes, letting your gentle fingers massage his scalp as you lather shampoo in his hair

The candles and bubbles 🫧 were a good touch too 👌

He almost always falls asleep by the time you're done massaging and cleaning him up, once you start scrubbing under his nails then he's OUT LIKE A LIGHT

Not that you mind, he's so attractive when he's sleeping

WAIT HUSBAND DON'T DROWN

Wakes up to an empty bathtub and a warm towel being wrapped around him by his delicious boo

You're so good to him how did you know he needed this

Always finds himself in a better mood after that, like his problems have all been washed and scrubbed away by your gentle pampering

He secretly loves it when you come by his radio tower with a fresh lunch, interrupting his set just because he needs to eat

Though he pretends it's a big hassle

He savors the food you bring him either way, walking you to the door afterwards and thanking you for thinking of him

Bby boy that's all you do is think about him

He locks the door on your way out tho

Alastor loves the way you convince him to come to bed with you, knowing he needs to sleep but also armed with the knowledge that he'll fight bedtime like a child

You leaning on the doorway already in your sleep attire, giving him a soft pout as he tries to continue his work and ignore you

"Alastor..."

Not his ears flicking up at the sound of your voice

When whining doesn't work, then you slink your way over to him, cupping his cheek and forcing him to look at you

He's trying so hard not to though, the moment he looks at your face then he knows he's done for

"Look at me, darling~"

Okay maybe just a quick glance-

Alastor you are a strong man, you are cruel and sadistic and you are an overlord with very important business!! You can handle telling your wife no-

Ffffffffuck.

Not the gooey goo goo doe eyes

Immediately leans into your touch, savoring the feeling of your fingers stroking his cheek

Not his tail fluttering

"Come to bed already~ I can't sleep without you, you know..."

And that's how you convince him to get to sleep every single night, a full 8 hours or whatever is recommended in Hell

Getting out of bed is hard for him because you look so delectable asleep and curled into him

Maybe he should take more time to pamper you too

But he's a selfish, greedy man who likes being spoiled by his wife so that thought is gone as fast as it came

He gets out of bed just to watch you whine and blindly reach out for him, so adorably pathetic

Okay just five more minutes of snuggles then I gotta go-

If he's cranky then you manage to convince him to nap, patting your lap and stroking his hair once he lays his head down

Your soft singing lulls him into a light sleep as you scratch and rub the ends of his ears

Wakes up drooling

Wakes up with his face buried in your stomach, arms locked around your waist as he sleepily breathes in your scent

How is he supposed to get any work done with you around????

Alastor loves all those things but his favorite way that you spoil him?? His number one fave?? That he would never admit to anyone??

When you give him your special smile, the one that's always been his to see and his alone

The smile that conveys enough warmth and love to make all of Hell seem like Heaven, at least for him anyways

The same smile that he first saw when you told him that you loved him, the same smile that tells him you still love him

You spoil him

Alastor thinking of his wife:

#alastor hazbin hotel x reader #alastor hazbin x reader #hazbin hotel x reader #alastor x reader #alastor being whipped!! Yes #wifey being whipped!!! YES #The deer himself getting spoiled??#YES #does he deserve it???#...no...#do we want it????#??#y-yes?

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whiskeyskin · 2 months ago

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Slow Down

Premise: Astarion discovers that disgustingly quick efficiency at sex, isn't always how everyone wants to enjoy it.

• Astarion x gn!Tav • M rating •

Astarion POV, gn!Tav, doggy, riding, slowing down, enjoyment, bloodplay/bloodlust, feral need, no mention of specific gentials.

2.7k words

Another blinder by @casualya 😙👌 you bless us daily with scrumptious pictures!

•°•°•

Astarion pumelled inside Tav, relentless and frenetic. The energetic pace and precise angle perfected over 200 years. A hand pressed down on the small of their back, the other pulling back on their hip.

This was his favourite position. Turned away; it was easier when they were turned away.

No eye contact. Less need for his practiced veneer. He could just 'get on with it' and be done quickly.

He could also pretend to 'clean himself off' while they were recovering from the earth shattering orgasm he'd just gave them. Keep up the charade till the end.

Their moans were rough, throaty and tense.

"You feel so good, darling." He parroted his old lines, "I want to come darling but I want you to come with me. Are you close for me?"

"Mm, not really." Tav admitted, an awkward tenseness in their voice. Astarion's thrust stuttered slightly, but continued.

He was ever a professional.

He blinked several times, furrowing his brow, "Do we need to change positions, love? I need to feel you come on my cock." He moaned through a bitten lip, slowing his pace.

Tav gave a pleasurable gasp, "Yes, please. It feels good, it's just-I find it difficult to come like this."

Astarion rolled his eyes behind their back, "Then we have to remedy that. Tonight is for out collective ecstasy, remember?" He crooned, gently extracting himself from inside them.

Irritated, Astarion pasted on his flawless veneer and recused himself from the situation, while his body piloted automatically.

Dissociating for him was like meditation, there were no thoughts. Nothingness. A great expanse of blackness and there he cocooned himself. Safe and removed inside.

His body had learned to respond to the stimuli around him, without needing him to be present.

Of course, some part of him was still present but not any part that mattered. No part that he hadn't painfully trained himself to repress and ignore.

There he waited for it to be over, in his safe pocket of void. Soundless. Wordless. Guiltless.

Of course this time would be different to his usual seductions. He would have to keep up a constant charade.

At the Palace, after the act, unlucky target would be taken away; to what they expected to be a bath, that would never come. However, if Cazador was feeling particularly cruel, he'd wrench them out, kicking and screaming before it was finished.

A foul part of him was grateful for it. That he didn't have to finish. That he didn't have to listen to their admissions of love, or satisfaction. Just their horrified screams, as a terrifying Vampire Lord threw them naked from the bed and dragged them behind him towards his study.

He would cower silently and stone-faced, as their blood-curdling howls would fade down the hallway, until the heavy doors shut. Even then his Vampiric hearing would pick up the sounds of panic and violence.

They'd beg him, plead with him, scream at him to help them, save them, intervene.. do something. But he never did. He never would. Never could. Not again.

Suddenly, an unexpected lurching motion tipped him over with a thud. Coming back to true consciousness, he blinked heavily as he realised he was splayed back on the forest floor.

Tav was holding his forearms over his head, "Told you I could." They smirked, slightly breathless.

"So you did. I'm impressed." Astarion replied, not missing a beat.

"I asked you to slow down, you didn't listen. So now, we're going to do this my way. So, you're going to lay back like a good pup and enjoy yourself. Got it?" There was assertiveness but amusement in their tone as they released his arms to reach between their bodies.

"I don't really think I have a choice." He tried to keep his voice steady but there was a wobble; he could hear it.

"Oh, don't worry your pretty little head, Astarion," he felt the tightness of their walls envelope him again, "Ahh.. it's our collective ecstasy, right?" They licked their bottom lip and placed their hands on his chest.

Astarion didn't answer. This was one of his least favourite positions.

He always felt exposed underneath someone face-to-face. Being giver, or receiver, it felt like he was close to scrutiny like this.

Still. In order to gain their trust further, and assure protection from Cazador - either by human shield, or sword - this was what he had to endure.

Tav began to rock on him, an easy, drawn out pace. Not at all like his urgent trists. He preferred a fast approach. To make them come as soon as possible. He had it down to a fine art but there were always outliers to any experiment.

Astarion grabbed their hips and tried to buck up but he was quickly thwarted.

"Uh-uh, not happening. We're going to slow down, and build this up nicely. Sex isn't about making people come quickly, it's about the journey together."

Tav placed their hands over Astarion's and slid them higher, to hold their waist. They rode him at what felt like a snail's pace, their hips fluidly rolling. Astarion resisted the urge to roll his eyes again.

They took him from tip, to bottomed out tortuously slowly. And while it did feel good, it wasn't going to end soon.

Astarion huffed out in frustration but disguised it with contentment and lust.

Dissociation was peering over his shoulder, inviting him to step away and let it take the reigns.

"Ah, darling. That feels wonderful. Riding me like that."

"Sweet one, this isn't riding. This is the introduction, the prologue, the handshake. I know you're used to it fast, but just bare with me. Just enjoy the sensation."

He squeezed their waist and sighed, "Alright, I'll bite. Well, again." He smirked with an eyebrow flex to himself.

"Mm, that did feel good. Bet it tasted better."

"It did," Astarion relented, "You are rather delicious."

"Better than the bear that got you drunk?"

"Yes, you taste far sweeter than a bear. Satisfied?" He teased, thrusting upwards to meet them. The corners of his vision began to settle and fuzz.

"Slowly." Tav breathed, using their hips to control his speed, "Tell me what I taste like."

His vision cleared and he blinked.

What a question.

One that pulled him back from the edge of nothingness, back to Tav's face above him.

What did they taste like?

It wasn't something he recognised. It wasn't a flavour, it was almost a feeling.

"You taste so sweet, darling. Like honeyed fruits." He placated, keening for good measure.

"The way you suck on my neck doesn't say that. What do I really taste like?"

His face twitched, "I don't know if I could put it into words." He lied, pinching his lips in frustration. At both the questions and the intrusion into his coping mechanism.

"Try."

He couldn't contain his eye roll this time but played off as teasing, "Um, you taste amazing. Like nothing I've ever tasted before."

Tav remained silent, still rocking themselves on his cock. Astarion felt compelled to continue.

"You taste like.. rich wine and sweet fruits.. like summer berries fresh from the bushel, like warm days by the riverside, like splashing in the cool water." He began, unsure where it would go.

Tav's pace increased slightly, harder pressure pushing him into the ground.

"Good man, that's better. What else do I taste like?" Their hands wandered his chest as they moved on him, languid strokes from root to tip.

Something akin to a shooting sensation buzzed from his pelvis. It was unfamiliar, but not unknown.

Enjoyment.

He allowed himself to indulge in their question, "You taste like sunshine and freedom, like the moment before lightning hits," jolts of electricity zappped to his tightening groin, "Your blood tastes like everything I miss from my mortal life, it's like the smell of warm rain quenching dry earth. The feeling of purest limitlessness."

The words left his mind and flew through his mouth before he had time to comprehend how foolish it sounded. But Gods, every word was true. Feeding freely on Thinking blood was a rush that had no competition. But feeding from Tav, was something else entirely.

Tav began bouncing, rippling their spine and hips to pound against him. Bringing a hand to play with themselves illiciting a soft whine.

They looked at him through a hot stare, pinning him to the floor, then looked down to their bodies. Astarion followed their gaze.

If he had breath to steal, it would have been willingly surrendered. Seeing their meeting, the sight of his pale cock, covered in slick, disappearing inside them. Their hand teasing their own release, the other pressed low against is abdomen.

Their soft flesh bounced against the momentum of their riding, he could feel the jiggle beneath his hands.

"When you feed on me it feels like dancing with adrenaline itself. My whole body feels alive but numb at the same time. I can feel you, can feel my blood pumping through your body. I can feel me within you, surrendering to you," Astarion's grip tightened, pressing bruises into their rolling hips.

"You could drain me dry, and leave me for dead and I'd still beg you for one more bite. To feel like that again. It's worth a little death." They smiled coyly down at him, tracing their fingertips against his lips, parting them to reveal his fangs.

Astarion about choked on his own saliva, through a wanton gasp.

A devilish glint sparked in their eye, as they tested the sharpness on the pad of their index finger. They gave a short gasp of pain as it punctured their skin.

Astarion's tongue instinctively flicked against the small rivulets of blood out of desperation. The taste of blood, combined with the pleasure of sex, unlocked some feral part of him that had been dormant for an age.

Groaning and baring his teeth, he slid a possessive hand up their sternum, and felt their heart hammering through their chest. He suckled on the tip of their finger as they rode him but it wasn't enough.

The thought of their hot, sweet, delicious blood pumping through their body. Blood that engorged their swollen sex. Blood that would sustain him, nourish him, make him feel happiness. A happiness he had barely been able to explain since their first feed.

Tav laid their other hand on top of his, "Can you feel how hard my heart's beating? How much I want this? How much I want you, Astarion?" They keened, as their eyes met in passionate gaze.

A noise that didn't quite come from the sane part of his mind erupted from his chest as he felt Tav squeeze his cock with their inner walls.

Astarion desperately gripped their hips and tried to wrap one arm around their body.

"More.. more." He moaned, roughly.

"Blood, or sex."

"Both." He spluttered, frantically clawing at them, sitting up to re-arrange the pose, "Both!"

"Yes, yes." They uttered, breathless.

Pressed body to body, buried deep inside, Astarion sank his fangs into the slope of their chest.

Hot, delicious blood spurted into his mouth, coating his tongue and throat, as he took long pulls and swallowed them down.

The sensation was overwhelming, their life force rushing around his undead body, their walls squeezed tightly around him. He could feel the ministrations of their hand stimulating their release between their slicked bodies.

Tav gasped and moaned against his ear, which they gently nipped and licked on.

Astarion's eyes rolled back into his head, as his jaw tightened, biting harder. He was paralyzed with an overabundance of pleasure, rendering him inert as Tav shot out a cry and continued bouncing down on his cock.

Their pace became erratic, breath hitching as they gasped against the cool night air. Rabid cries of ecstasy echoed through the night as Tav's orgasm hit them.

Small, tense noises roughly eeked from his throat, as a sudden tightening gripped what was left of his soul like a vice, before a violent torrent of orgasmic energy flooded through him. His head jerked back, blood dripping down his chin. Chest hollowing, his eyes found Tav's, connecting them in the moment at the centre of the storm.

The world stilled for the briefest of moments, filled with the warmth of their gaze.

A cry of rapture died in his crimson coated throat and he came inside them, painting their walls with his seed. Tav bottomed out as he filled them to the brim with his cum, rocking their hips against him, over and over, coaxing every last drop.

"Agh, stop please.. mercy." He whined, as his head hit their shoulder, wrung dry from overstimulation.

He still smelled their blood from where he'd not shown enough care, in his hedonistic state, to stem the flow. He thought to cover it with his hand, but Tav had beaten him to it, still holding him upright with the other.

They softly leaned forward to lay him back down on the bedroll, in which he thunked back, gracelessly.

Half-hard and still inside them, his head swimming with the afterglow of his unexpected orgasm, Astarion tried to descend back to Faerûn.

Tav's blood was pumping through his ears, the loud whooshing noise drowning out the insect nightlife that crowded this part of the woods.

A quick kiss touched the tip of his nose, then he felt Tav extracte themself off him and lay beside him. The cold night air now stark and unwelcome, when compared to their warmth.

"Now that was collective ecstasy." Tav said finally, with a wearied but playful lilt.

"Mhm." He replied, unable to apply his brain back into conversation. He heard them moving around to grab a cloth for their puncture marks and a little clean up.

Several moments passed him by, staring up into the darkened starlit sky. He felt he was still up there, in the Astral, after the viciousness of cumming that hard - and after so long.

A pair of soft lips traced over his shoulder, peppering the area with kisses, and for the first time in over two decades; he didn't feel the urge to flinch.

"Are you still with us, Astarion?"

He shook his head, "Unfortunately not."

"Oh, dear."

"I'm quite unavailable for conversation at this moment in time."

Tav giggled softly, "Was it the combination of feeding and ear fondling that tipped the scales for you there? I know you were rolling your eyes when I slowed the pace down. I'd heard ear stimulation was part of Elven foreplay, I thought it would add a little something for you." Tav discarded the bloodied cloth, to join the one stained with cum and rolled onto their side to face him.

"It did." He nodded, angling his face to them. He found his new marks on their skin, they were a lot more vicious than those he'd made on their neck, evidence of his animalistic need. "It's never quite felt like that." He admitted, feeling a little sheepish.

"I told you. It's the journey that gets you to the destination." Tav smiled down at him, leaning on one hand, the other resting on his chest.

"That you did." Astarion felt embarrassment creeping up the sides of his neck and flushing his cheeks, as he felt the true gravity of how low he'd left his defences.

"Astarion, are you blushing?" Tav tucked their chin in, shocked.

He turned the corners of his mouth down in disgust, "Of course not! Vampire's don't blush. We don't have any blood." He pointed out.

"Well, you do right now and that's definitely a rosy tinge in your cheeks." They teased, rubbing their nose against the aforementioned red cheeks.

Astarion flinched away, "Stop." He snapped, frowning.

Tav held up their palm, "Alright, I'm sorry. You're not blushing, it's just a trick of the light. Astarion, the Rakeish Vampire-Spawn, does not blush."

"Certainly not, perish the thought. You're delirious with the after effects. The lack of blood has gone to your head." He pouted vehemently, recoiling from the thought he'd actually enjoyed himself.

Enjoyed the sex he'd used them for, that it hadn't been anything more than what it needed to be; a tool in his arsenal of manipulations.

Blushing? He was blushing?! Gods below.

"And the missing blood has gone straight to yours." They teased.

Astarion glared at them but only half meant it. He was still too happy to be miserable. But he had no doubt that the ravages of self-loathing and despair wouldn't give him restbite for long. He may as well enjoy the feeling while it lasted.

"I can promise you, that blood is headed only one place and intends to make you scream like that at least another twice before morning. Especially now I know exactly how you like it," He moaned, pushing them over effortlessly, "This journey isn't over yet, darling."

•°•°•

#astarion #bg3 astarion #bg3 smut #astarion ancunin #astarion smut #astarion x tav #bg3 #astarion x gn!tav #whiskeyskin masterlist #whiskeyskin

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hedgethemaze · 1 year ago

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HHRHGHGHGHHGHGHH ARGHHHHHHHH GRARRARRARAAA Asami Sato drawn by Irene Koh, "Turf Wars" (2017)

#Asami Sato #lok comics #Turf Wars #😩👌#🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥#her character design is flawless #asami's one gorgeous woman #😍😍😍😍😍

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starcurtain · 10 months ago

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Outing myself as the dead-opposite of a Genshin rarepair lover to say that my favorite brand of Zhongli/Childe is definitely:

Grandpa's Mid-Life Crisis Retirement Checklist:

✅️ Flawless human disguise (no one suspects a n y t h i n g)

✅️ Part-time side hustle

✅️ Self-planned funeral (the flowers were fire 👌)

✅️ Friends know I'm not actually dead

✅️ Liyue flourishing

✅️✅️✅️ Russian mail order husband

#genshin impact #genshin impact shitpost #zhongli #childe #tartaglia #zhongchi #tartali #listen I don't understand how the fandom couldn't settle on #chili #as the ship name #PLEASE DON'T TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY #(but I'm right though).#Other adepti's retirement plans:#meditation #inventing #cloud gazing #contemplation of nature's virtues #Rex Lapis' retirement plan:#Cause the biggest fucking commotion #throw myself the sickest retirement party #find the one (1) boy in Liyue Cloud Retainer would NOT approve of #whirlwind romance with a sexy young abyss-corrupted enemy of the state #Neuvillette voice: He blew up our courtroom???#Zhongli voice: *happy sigh* That rascal.#OKAY BUT BEING SERIOUS #What I actually mean is that I love Zhongli/Childe fics and art #that recognize that Zhongli had lost his sense of purpose #and begun to question whether his existence was even needed anymore #and Childe is so full of the will to live no matter what #to keep growing and improving just for the wild joy and sake of existence itself

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smehur · 2 months ago

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Drarry fic recs #5

oxygen [Fic & Art] by @maesterchill

Draco doesn’t smoke. Except when he needs to breathe.

A wonderfully atmospheric rendering of the moment when the tentative friendship hesitantly built through years of unplanned meetings gently turns into a deeper, romantic intimacy. Featuring a lovely, lonely Draco and an incredibly evocative description of the magic hiding in cigarette smoke. 10/10 would read again.

AITA for being "obsessed" with my childhood nemesis? by @rainstormradish

Alrakis • I [24M] attended a small boarding school in the UK. There was a boy in my year, a couple of months younger than me, and he became my nemesis after we developed an intense rivalry. My friend [25F] told me recently that our dynamic was "weird back then" and that "it’s even weirder" that I still think about him today. She argued that I talk about him all the time, but I believe the amount I talk about him is reasonable. AITA? prongymcprongface • i completely get what you mean. i had a nemesis (like a school one, separate to my other nemesis) and we had a dynamic super similar to what you are describing. having a nemesis is a very cool and normal thing dw about it. NTA In which Draco asks the internet if he's being reasonable. Only one commenter is sympathetic. They start talking.

This was so much fun to read, I don't even. A brilliant concept, flawless execution, and bonus points for Draco's online name. ✨👌

For Lack of Wanting by @fluxweeed

Over the last ten years, I’ve worked hard to become a better person. I hate being reminded of who I used to be. But Harry likes it when I’m mean.

I loved this even though it broke my heart. Perhaps because (like with other fics that successfully broke my heart), I could totally see it: a Harry who grows into his fame, a Harry who doesn't look under the surface of things unless forced, a Harry who never spared a serious thought about Draco after the war. And a Draco desperate enough to throw everything away for him anyway. Beautifully crafted and utterly devastating.

By the Grace by @letteredlettered

Harry is an Auror instructor. Malfoy wants to be an Auror.

Oh, boy. This fic. It left a mark on me. It's the second most literary fic I've read to date (topmost being Running on Air by eleventy7), and by far the most ambitious one. That summary doesn't begin to do it justice. It's a story about the initiative to reveal the wizarding world to the Muggles; the political struggles of those for and against it, including activism, media manipulation, government corruption, and even terrorism; and Harry and Draco in the midst of it all. I also suspect it's brimming with commentary on real life UK politics, but I'm too distant from those topics myself to say more. It is for this ambition, and for the the meticulous creation of a detailed post-war political landscape and the actors trying to shape it, that I wholeheartedly applaud and recommend this fic. Anyone looking for an adult, thought-provoking, political story perfectly set within the Harry Potter world will have an absolute blast with it.

But I can't say I enjoyed it. I picked it up not for the politics, but for the romance. And the romance, while definitely an omnipresent element, was kept so deep in the background, that the reading was an exercise in frustration almost to the very end. This was done purposely, with incredible consistency and discipline, and to great effect, in order to craft the slowest of slow burns. But I, like a kid bored with the things on the news, skimmed through the lot of political discussions (which are what gives the story such a strong literary vibe), constantly looking for the individual, the personal, the relatable; constantly hoping for the feels. And when they came to the fore at last, it was a bit too little, too late.

As much as I admire its ambition and craftsmanship, this is not a story I would read again. But I will never, ever forget it.

Nice Things by aideomai

The first thing that happened was Theodore Nott came back from France.

Possibly the softest, gentlest, most soothing story I've read in this fandom so far. Something to come back to when my spirits need a lift. There's a scene (spoiler: it asks and answers the question, "are you fucking with me?") that I read three or four times in a row, smiling wider and wider on each go, and another (someone returning after holidays) that i had to revisit at least twice. This doesn't happen often in my reading! I confess I wished for a more detailed exploration of the developing intimacy (read: smut), but I respect the author's decisions; they left me with a heart full of warmth and a head full of dreams.

Many thanks to the wonderful authors in this fandom for sharing their stories, and to all the readers who help spread the word. ❤️

#drarry #fic rec #rec list #harry potter #my post

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mazzystar24 · 7 months ago

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I totally get I just finished my exam week (I had to do a math test at 8am Sat😭). Wish you luck tho!

Also do you have any good buddies fics? Destiel too?

Math test at 8am is BRUTAL

Thank you I will definitely need it😭😭

Unfortunately I only have buddie fics to offer😔:

(Warning I do like a fair amount of angst)

Right where you left me - by hyacinthusbloom ( @thebloomingheather on here) - when I say I might be as big a fan of this fic as I am of the show I MEAN IT, you do not even understand how much I love this fic or how obsessed I am with it, I have reread it so many times despite it still being in progress that I think I may genuinely qualify it as addictive, me and @estheticpotaeto legit wait for updates like a dog at the author’s door istg, like everything about this fic is flawless and written with so much love and emotion and the way the writer captures the effects of trauma is just amazing because it’s so rare to find this level of diving into ptsd and the more uncomfortable aspects of it that are more taboo or less understandable to people, like I can yap for an hour about this fic but I’ll just say READ IT

Any fic by daisies_and_briars ( @cal-daisies-and-briars on here) but one of my favourites of his is Both blade and branch and muscle memory and four can keep a secret and appetency and the two she’s writing right now (change the prophecy and steal my sunshine) -wow at that point I should’ve left it as any fic because that’s a lot of favourites😭😭

Any fic by @loserdiaz plus with them you get enough lighthearted fics to even out the angst

Ooo I’m not sure what their username on here is but lizzybizzyzz is also another writer who I just love their fics

Fractals by hobbitprincess - one of those fics that make you squeak at how much love these fictional characters have for each other

Beneath my mother tongue by archerincombat - the angst the writing the way they hit every single emotional beat? Amazing

Anything by this_is_moony_lovegood

Leave the light on (I’ll be coming home) by HMSLusitania - the presumed dead Eddie fic of your dreams, a constant reread for me it’s just 👌

Anchored by adorkable_buddie - sorry Chris you gotta be injured sometimes just for us to get our buddie dreams hope you understand and we appreciate your sacrifice 😔🫶

empty, broken, lonely, hoping by daniweb - when I tell you I love the presumed dead trope you best believe I’m telling the truth because the ANGST?? Yes please, LISTEN it’s the closest you can get to the emotional beats of killing off a character without ever killing them off because you love them and happy endings too much so TIM MINEAR TAKE NOTES I KNOW YOU SAID YOU LOVE THEM TOO MUCH TO KILL THEM, anyways back to to the point this fic again is just flawless execution by the writer like absolutely love it

every time we stop talking (the universe starts screaming) by withmeornotatall - emotional destruction and I absolutely love it, divorce era 2.0 and it HITS

Home is where it hurts- by rileyblue2001 - can you tell I hate the Buckley parents because I HATE the Buckley parents

The one with the return of the sex addiction by buddiefication (pumpkincreamcoldbrew) - I’ve reccomended so much angst so have a funny little light hearted buddie fic with the father bobby vibes we all love❤️❤️

Okay back to the angst tho 😭😭- out of ashes by Ashavahishta - AHHHHHHH THIS FIC JUST AHHHHH STOP THE WAY I WOULD DIE FOR A FOLLOW UP FIC TO THIS AHHHH I LOVE IT SM AND ITS LEGIT A ONE SHOT I CRIED SO HARD

Falling Slowly; Sing Your Melody (I’ll Sing It Loud) by Princessfbi ( @princessfbi on here who I also love sm of their fics so highly suggest just going on their page and looking through all the fics) - absolutely love it, legit gave me brain rot and got me obsessed for a GOOD while

I'm comin' back, don't let me go by wikiangela ( @wikiangela on here also love love their fics again so check them out but this one is probably my favourite of theirs)

Okay this is looking more and more like a uni reading list so I’m gonna shut up now but I hope you enjoy these fics and that a few of them emotionally damage you like they did me because I love to spread the joy (see: pain and suffering) 🫶🫶

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gabriel-xander · 2 months ago

Text

Don't Forget

[Sans x Female!Reader]

17: You Sick Bastard

A/N: My apologcheese. What was supposed to be a cute sick–comfort chapter, turned into me coming up with monster biology and magic and making Sans yapp about it like a fucking nerd 🗿 Also I made a doodle of my oc and Elliot (I cannot stress enough that my oc is NOT the canon appearance it's just a drawing) but the dress is canon from earlier chapters so wahoo You can see it at the END of the chapter!

A/N: Wing Dings translations will be included at the end of the chapter!

♪⁠────✿⁠(⁠✧◕⁠ᴗ⁠◕✧⁠)✿⁠────♪

“…ey…”

“hey…”

“Pst…! Hey…!”

You scrunch up your face and reluctantly open your eyes.

Your head is lying on someone’s lap, on your friend Elliot’s lap. His soft, brown hair looks soft to the touch like it always does, and his dark, almost black, brown eyes stare down at you with a smile. His dark tan skin looks almost flawless, which makes you mad low-key because how the hell does he look so good as a mentally ill University student?

Elliot raises a thick brow, “You okay? You kind of just fell over suddenly and passed out. Probably would’ve had a sore neck if I didn’t move you.”

You furrow your brows in confusion, “I… passed out? That doesn’t sound like me.”

“Yeah, well, you did.”

You sit up with a soft grunt, rubbing the back of your head. Ugh, what a migraine…! Your head is pounding with an ache that you can only describe as physically coming from your brain. That’s so uncomfortable.

“Hey, Elliot.”

“Yeah, [Y/n]?”

You lower your hand.

“What do you thi-”

You stare at your palm, frozen to the core, unable to move.

There’s…

There’s a hole in the center of your palm.

“[Y/n]?”

There’s a hole in the center of your palm.

“✋︎☠︎❄︎☜︎☼︎☜︎💧︎❄︎✋︎☠︎☝︎”

“✞︎☜︎☼︎✡︎ ✋︎☠︎❄︎☜︎☼︎☜︎💧︎❄︎✋︎☠︎☝︎”

You can hear the confusion in Elliot’s voice. “Uh… what the hell did you just say?

What?

You didn’t say that?

“💧︎⚐︎ ✡︎⚐︎🕆︎ 🕈︎☜︎☼︎☜︎ ❄︎☟︎☜︎ ⚐︎☠︎☜︎ 🕈︎☟︎⚐︎ ☞︎☜︎☹︎☹︎ 👎︎⚐︎🕈︎☠︎”

“✋︎ ✌︎🏱︎⚐︎☹︎⚐︎☝︎✋︎☪︎☜︎ ❄︎☟︎✌︎❄︎ ✡︎⚐︎🕆︎ 🕈︎✋︎☹︎☹︎ 💧︎⚐︎⚐︎☠︎ 💣︎☜︎☜︎❄︎ 💣︎☜︎ 🕆︎☠︎👎︎☜︎☼︎ ❄︎☟︎☜︎💧︎☜︎ 🕆︎☠︎☞︎⚐︎☼︎❄︎🕆︎☠︎✌︎❄︎☜︎ 👍︎✋︎☼︎👍︎🕆︎💣︎💧︎❄︎✌︎☠︎👍︎☜︎💧︎”

Elliot leans away from you, “[Y/n], you’re uh, you’re kind of scaring me…”

You look at Elliot with wide, blank eyes.

“✌︎☹︎☹︎ ❄︎☟︎✋︎☠︎☝︎💧︎ 👍︎⚐︎☠︎💧︎✋︎👎︎☜︎☼︎☜︎👎︎📪︎ ☟︎⚐︎🕈︎☜︎✞︎☜︎☼︎📪︎ ✡︎⚐︎🕆︎ ✌︎☼︎☜︎ ❄︎☟︎☜︎ 🏱︎☜︎☼︎☞︎☜︎👍︎❄︎ ✌︎👍︎👍︎✋︎👎︎☜︎☠︎❄︎”

“☯︎✡︎📭︎☠︎☸︎📪︎ ✋︎ 💣︎🕆︎💧︎❄︎ 👌︎☜︎☝︎ ⚐︎☞︎ ✡︎⚐︎🕆︎📬︎ 💧︎❄︎✌︎✡︎ 👎︎☜︎❄︎☜︎☼︎💣︎✋︎☠︎☜︎👎︎”

…What?

You didn’t say that?

────────

You wake up in a cold sweat.

Your chest is rising and falling rapidly, and tears have fallen down the sides of your face.

What was that?

…

What was that?!

You sit up on the couch, rubbing your eyes. Your throat feels so fucking itchy, shit. You wouldn’t be surprised if you actually did come down with a cold.

You vaguely remember it, but as you allow yourself to calm down, more and more comes back to you. You dreamt that you were with Elliot somewhere, and had apparently fainted? But then…

You quickly look down at your hands, sighing in relief that there are no holes in the palm of your hands. You’re not a fucking idiot, whatever the hell was talking about in your dream had to be that fucker who speaks in Wing Dings: W.D. Gaster.

You wish you knew what he was saying, but it just sounded like gibberish to you. You can only assume it was W.D. Gaster because that gibberish noise sounded familiar to you when you would look up lore videos about the guy.

You run your hand through your hair, sighing heavily through your nose and furrowing your brows.

What does he want with you? There’s no way it’s a coincidence that you dreamed about him when your dreams, for the whole time you’ve been here, have been pretty normal. And by normal, you mean hella confusing and unhinged. BUT IN A WAY THAT’S NORMAL FOR DREAMS!!

You look up to the second floor in the direction of Sans’ room. You wish you could talk to him about it, but…

You’re still scared of Sans, in all honesty.

He’s been really nice to you so far, but there’s this underlying tension between you two as if you’re waiting for the other to fuck up at any moment. And anyway, how would you bring it up? What reason do you have to bring it up with Sans of all people? Why would you even assume he would know anything about W.D. Gaster? More specifically, how would you explain all that to Sans if he were to ask? But you’re smarter than that, you’re smarter than to believe NOT telling him anything is the better plan. You’ll have to tell him eventually, but you need to think about how first.

You move the covers off your body, sitting up so your feet touch the carpeted floor. After leaving Grillby’s last night (you paid for the food despite Sans’ instance that it could be added to his tab), you took your damn shower at long last. By the time you got out though, nearly all the lights were off save for the one in the kitchen. Sans was presumably in his own room now. There were a few pillows and a thick, fluffy blanket neatly on the couch waiting for you.

It was really nice of him.

What isn’t nice is the sore throat you have alongside all the sore muscles you’re rocking. You know sleeping on the most comfy couch ever didn’t give you these sore muscles. It’s pretty warm in the house right now, so you don’t feel the need to put on sweatpants over your pajama shorts. You normally sleep with only a t-shirt and underwear, but maybe it’s because you’re living with dudes now that you’re adding shorts too.

This is so inconvenient to your life.

Your phone is on the small table with the Quantum Physics joke book, so you’re forced to get out of bed (the couch counts as a bed now, right?) to check the time on it. You cringe when you turn on the screen: seven in the goddamn morning. Toriel really did manage to train your psyche to wake up early. You look through your suitcase to get your black slippers, putting them on before walking to the kitchen.

Looking in the refrigerator disappoints you just as much as it did yesterday. You can’t even make them breakfast since their punk asses don’t have groceries. You guess you can clean for now then until Papyrus wakes up.

────

Never mind, you’re in fucking shambles.

Not only is your sore throat getting worse, but it’s getting hotter too. To top it all fucking off, they don’t fuckING HAVE CLEANING SUPPLIES!! YOU CAN’T LIVE LIKE THIS!!!

You’re pacing angrily in the living room, thinking how fast can you be to run to the store on your own to buy a few things. Your gold is VERY limited until you can get a job, only 100 to spend with 30 of it spent last night on your food. You think food is going to be your priority, then cleaning supplies.

With a nod, you go back to your suitcase and start stifling through it again. There’s a decent-sized space between the couch and the small table against the wall, so that’s where you’re leaving your crap at. You wish you could buy a basket for any dirty clothes you have, but you’ll just have to fold and pile them next to your case.

You pull your notebook out with a smile, happy that the pen is still sticking to the side of it. You go back to the kitchen and look around their cupboards and pantries. They have cups, plates, bowls, and silverware, so you don’t have to worry about that at least. You’re going to assume that they’ve been drinking tap water since Toriel had told you before that it’s safe and also contains magic. For food though…

Your budget is only 70 gold, so you need to make it count. You need milk and cereal for sure. Hm, things to make sandwiches in case you don’t have a lot to make a whole meal…

────

You have a small list of groceries and more symptoms by the time Papyrus wakes up from his beauty sleep. It’s nearly nine am, and he’s still wearing his battle body but has a cute, orange nightcap on his skull. When he comes downstairs and sees you awake on the neat couch, he lights up.

“[Y/N], I SEE THAT YOU ARE AWAKE ALREADY!”

You clear your throat and smile, “Good morning, Papyrus.”

He winces and looks at you like you have diseases, “OH. WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOUR VOICE?”

“Ha-ha, I’m pretty sure I got sick yesterday since I’ve never been exposed to the snow before,” You wave a dismissive hand, “It’s not a big deal, I think it’s just the fl-”

“-YOU… YOU’RE SICK?!”

You blink, “Yeah, but I-”

“-OH, DEAR. OH, GOSH. JU-JUST STAY RIGHT THERE!”

“Papyrus, what-”

The tall, lanky boy runs back upstairs with an energy this early in the morning that amazes you. He runs to Sans’ door, and you expect that it won’t open since it’s always locked in the game. To your surprise though, it opens up for the younger brother.

“SANS,” Papyrus rushes to his bed and violently shakes him by the shoulders, “YOU NEED TO WAKE UP NOW!”

Sans, for once, wakes up quickly. He looks around frantically in the room until his eyes land on Papyrus (even though he is right in his face). His younger brother has never been this scared before, and Sans can’t help but blame you immediately for it.

“w-what?! papyrus, what is-”

“THE HU–[Y/N] IS SICK!!”

That gets Sans out of bed, “she’s what?!”

“HURRY, GET UP!!”

“i’m up, i’m up!”

Sans is in the same shit he’s always wearing minus the slippers, hoodie, and mittens. Actually, his shirt is different too as he's no longer wearing a turtleneck and just a regular white t-shirt. He can’t find it in him to care though because you’re sick. He frantically gets out of bed, going after Papyrus who is running out of his room already.

How the hell can you be sick?! Is the monster food you’ve been eating nonstop since arriving? Does it have a toxic side effect on humans if they consume it too much for too long? Or is it your specific biology and immune system that’s fighting back against it? Oh God, Toriel is going to kill him and follow through with her threat!

Sans stops at the top of the staircase, his ribs rising and falling with anxiety. You look between him and Papyrus, confusion and panic on your face.

“Okay, what the fuck is going on? You guys are seriously starting to scare the shit out of me!” You look at Sans even though Papyrus is right up in your business, “I’m-I’m just sick, that’s it!”

Oh, God. You don’t know! How the hell is Sans supposed to ruin your world and life just like that?!

He need not fear, however, since Papyrus takes it upon himself to be the harbinger of bad news.

“[Y/N], I FEAR THAT YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND THE SEVERITY OF YOUR CONDITION.” Papyrus kneels in front of you, tears in his fucking eyes?!?! “BUT I DO NOT WANT YOU TO WORRY. I DO NOT WANT YOU TO BE AFRAID. BECAUSE SANS AND I WILL BE HERE WITH YOU THE WHOLE TIME.”

…

You look at Papyrus with bewilderment, “Papyrus.”

“Y-YES?”

“…Respectfully… What the fuck are you talking about?” You raise your eyebrow, unable to help the exasperated expression, “It’s the Flu, that’s it. Humans get it all the time, and 70% of the time, it’s not severe and I’ll be just fine in, like, two weeks at MOST. Worst comes to worst, I get pneumonia, but I don’t think it’s gonna be that bad.”

“…WHAT.”

“Wait, is getting sick really that different for monsters?”

Judging from their expressions and how scared they were for you-

“Oh, my God. Babes, I am so sorry,” You reach your arms out to the tall boy and he hugs you immediately, “Aw, Papyrus, I’m so sorry! No, no, no! Human sickness is so different from monsters, I’m going to be just fine!”

“YOU-YOU’RE NOT GOING TO FALL DOWN?” He asks in a wobbly voice, breaking your heart.

Is that how they refer to it? It sounds vaguely familiar.

“No, lovely. I’m not going to fall down. I’m gonna have a runny nose, a cough, some sore muscles, and a fever for the next week or so, but that’s all.” You then look up and lock eyes with Sans, noting how he also calmed down. “I’m sorry to scare you guys, I swear I’m going to be okay. Who knows, maybe monster food can actually help me get better!”

Sans sighs heavily but silently, leaning against the wall for mental support. Ah shit, you feel so bad now. You should’ve just lied and kept your flu to yourself-

“Wait!” You abruptly pull away from Papyrus with wide eyes, “Get away, I-I don’t know if this is contagious to monsters, but it’s contagious to humans!”

And just like that, Papyrus fucking jumps away from you. He makes a strange ninja pose with his hands, looking at you like you definitely have diseases. He looks so much better now that the misunderstanding is cleared.

“I AM HAPPY THAT YOU WILL BE OKAY, BUT… I AM GOING TO SHOWER NOW! I DO NOT WANT TO RISK CATCHING YOUR HUMAN SICKNESS!”

“Good idea, Papyrus.”

With a relieved smile, the monster hurries up the stairs. He beams at his poor brother who basically woke up for no reason.

“YOU HEAR THAT, BROTHER? [Y/N] IS GOING TO BE JUST FINE!”

Sans gives him a thumbs up but smushes himself against the wall when the other passes him. He doesn’t wanna get any human sicknesses either. Papyrus goes into his room to presumably, get a new change of clothes. It’d be smart for him to change and wash his battle body now too just in case. In the meantime, Sans walks downstairs keeping his hands balled up to hide his hands as much as he can.

You sniff a little grossly and smile weakly, “I’m really sorry for the nine am scare. I-I didn’t think Papyrus would react like that.”

“it’s nine in the morning? gross. but it’s better to be safe than sorry.”

“Tell me about it.” You look away and gnaw at your bottom lip, “Hey, Sans. What does “fall do-”

“let’s–wait until paps is in the shower.”

“Oh, o-okay.”

Your notebook is still on the couch with you; you open it up and flip to a new page. You title it:

Humans vs Monsters:

WITNESS THE SICKNESS

You’re so funny, wow.

Sans walks to the kitchen as you begin writing down in your book.

So, monsters don’t get sick the same as humans. In fact, being sick is extremely fatal and severe for them. Even Papyrus was genuinely scared for you about it. It’s safe to assume that being sick means it’s almost, if not 100%, guaranteed that you’ll die. Or in Papyrus’ terms: “fall down.”

Is “fall down” just a nicer way of saying it? Similar to how humans will use “passed away?”

Toriel told you that monsters don’t necessarily get sick, though. Could it be because the way you described sickness to her doesn’t match the kind of monsters?

“what’re you writing there?”

You look up at Sans’ close voice. He’s holding two glasses of cups: one he’s drinking now, and the other stretched out to you. You take it with a smile and a thanks, letting the book lie open on your lap.

You tell him truthfully, “Just some notes I’ve been keeping about monsters. I figured that I should write it down if I plan to live in the Underground for a while. It’s also just interesting to learn about the differences in the biology of monsters versus humans. For example, did you know that humans born as females have a menstrual cycle for about forty to fifty years of their lives?”

“However,” You hold up your finger, making Sans wait so you can drink some water. Ah, much better, “Since monsters don’t bleed and, obviously, don’t have the same internal anatomy, they don’t ever have to experience it?”

…A menstrual cycle? Why does that sound familiar?

This is a fun topic, though. You said once that you couldn’t be a doctor anymore now that you’re here, but he thought you were just talking out of your ass. You’re book-smart then? That’s… cool if he’s honest.

“and what makes you think monsters don’t have the same internal anatomy as humans?” He asks, curious.

You look back confused, “I mean… do they not? You don’t have any organs, do you?”

“no, but you remember the others from grillby’s? well, grillbz doesn’t have any organs. but doggo, red bird, drunk bun; those guys have something like a skeleton and organs. they have a heart beating in their chest. they’re prime examples of monsters with a complex biology.”

You widen your eyes, “You’re kidding, no way! Blood doesn’t circulate them though, right? So what’s pumping through their veins?”

Look, this is actually surprisingly fun to talk about with you, but Sans is a little uncomfortable that he’s telling all this to a human. Yeah, it’s genuine curiosity and wonder in your eyes, but you’re a human. A knowledgeable one at that. There’s no telling what you could do with this information. For his own reassurance, he has to know what exactly is in your book.

“what do ya think? pure love and magic.”

“Wait, so what about you, Papyrus and Grillby, then? You guys don’t have organs or a beating heart, but you’re alive.” You put your now empty glass on the floor by the couch. You’ll put it away later.

Shit, but it is nice to have someone to talk to about this stuff. Health and biology aren’t exactly Sans’ strong suit or his area of expertise, but that doesn’t mean he’s ignorant. Hah, if you were knowledgeable about monsters, maybe you could be a doctor for them.

“can’t really speak for grillby, but i’m a bone-afide skeleton who runs solely on magic. unlike someone like doggo, i don’t got lungs to breathe, but i can still do this.” Sans, to prove his point, takes a deep breath through his nose, and out. “it’s not that i’m breathing in ‘n out, but i’m taking in air through magic, and releasing excess magic that i don’t need.”

You’re nodding your head as he talks, looking at him as if he were the most interesting thing in the world. It makes him a little flustered, but he plays it off by telling you more. Not because he likes having your eyes on him so intensely, it’s just… uh, fun telling you all this stuff.

Both you and Sans were so engrossed with each other, that you didn’t notice or hear Payrus finally making it to the shower.

“let’s say i lose my head one day and decide to go for a run. think of the way your heart starts pumping more and more, and you get more and more heated. i don’t gotta breathe for oxygen, but it’s a way of uh… of ventilating excess heat my magic is building up. the more my magic works itself up, the hotter my breath gets, too.”

“Dude, that’s fucking cool as shit,” You grin widely, “Now let’s talk about how you intake food and liquid-”

“-ah, ah, ah. aren’t you forgettin’ somethin’?”

You sulk your shoulders, “Oh, right. “Falling down.”

…No, he was actually referring to the menstrual cycle you mentioned earlier. But yeah, he supposes that, too. He’ll learn what the hell Napstablook was yapping about that one day… eventually…

“well, as you can prolly guess by now, monsters aren’t all that experienced with illnesses since it rarely happens. but when a monster is sick, or they’re ‘bout to die of old age, they lie down, immobile. no matter what, they can’t get back up. so we eventually started calling this state, “fallen down” or “fell down” or whatever. a monster who has fallen down will soon die and turn to dust.”

“Oh, God.” You scrunch up your nose, “But, other humans have fallen into the Underground before, right? Did they… Were they really killed so fast that…”

Were their lives taken so early, at such a young age, that not a single human had been able to live long enough for monsters to learn about basic human sickness?

Remembering it again now, that minus Chara, six human children have been killed. One of their gloves is in your possession because you’ve been planning to find the other glove and keep hold of it as a small remembrance. But…

You clutch your stomach subconsciously.

You have a dead child’s glove in your possession.

Sans is able to read your expression and guess where your sentence is going. He grimaces and looks away.

“Sorry, I-I don’t really want to talk about this anymore,” You croak softly, “I made a list of things I wanted to get, but I shouldn’t go out in this condition. If it’s okay with you and Papyrus, can you buy it for me? I’ll provide the gold for it, too.”

“uh, yeah. yeah, i can do that.”

“Thanks,” You put the back of your hand against your cheek, “Gross human fact number sixty-nine: one of the best ways to get rid of a fever is to sweat it out. So, I’m gonna wrap myself up, and sweat this shit-fever out.”

“what about the other sixty-eight facts?”

“…Did… the sixty-nine go over your head?”

“you keep telling me these jokes that only make sense to other humans.”

“Ugh, you’re bumming me out. Leave me to perish.”

“too soon,” Sans scrunches his nose, miraculously. It seems his bone is more malleable than you first thought.

You just wave him off, reciting the meme word for word, “You just can’t handle the uber instincts of my uber autism.”

“what?”

“Observe.”

You lay back down and pull your folded cover over your body again, wrestling with the blanket before wrapping it around yourself. You turn your back on the skeleton monster man.

“Snorrrk mimimimi. Snoooorkkkk mimimimimi.”

“????”

Maybe it’s a human sickness thing.

────────────────

Translations from the Wing Dings (in order):

INTERESTING.

VERY INTERESTING.

SO YOU WERE THE ONE WHO FELL DOWN.

I APOLOGIZE THAT YOU WILL SOON MEET ME UNDER THESE UNFORTUNATE CIRCUMSTANCES.

ALL THINGS CONSIDERED, HOWEVER, YOU ARE THE PERFECT ACCIDENT.

[Y/N], I MUST BEG OF YOU. STAY DETERMINED.

And here is the doodle I mentioned in the Author's Note :)