#fires of the north
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Fires of the North
CHAPTER 1: FELL BOUND
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The newspapers began reporting on the construction of the great refinery long before even the switchblade-quick men of almighty business could swoop down like vultures from penthouses and corner offices and tear the land apart. No, when news broke on the front page of the Borean Dawn- OIL FIELDS FOUND IN FROZEN NORTH- what would go on to be the most contested piece of land in the Arctic Circle was still just snow and ice, one hundred miles from the nearest major civilization. And yet, the moment those hunters struck oil, journalists hacked out stories and printing presses churned out copy after copy hailing the construction of the most magnificent new oil refinery in the world, a veritable palace of industry, the vital turning point that would finally bring Hyperborea to the world’s attention, under the assumption that the magnate with the sharpest teeth would have broken ground before they could get another issue out.
This is not what would eventually become of the oil field.
There would be no palace of industry, no global eyes on long-overlooked Hyperborea, and no winner to the rat race that would go on to stain the snowfields for the next several years. Seventy-four starry-eyed men and women from every place conceivable, surnames from every dialect and tongue, would set out northward with teams of shovel-wielding laborers and vast pools of gold at their command. By the end of the first winter, only three would remain.
To understand the depth and depravity of the events that would play out there, one must first understand the depth and depravity of Hyperborea herself. None can match her beauty, and none can match her wrath. Poets wax and dream of her frozen shores, of rivers cutting through endless glittering fields of snow, of secrets untouched by time within the beating heart of shining glaciers- and yet the reality of fair Hyperborea, the Frozen North, Hell on Ice, Glacale, the Last Rise before the Abyss, is a cold and cruel one. The country, and the vanishingly few brave souls who live in it, seem balanced on a knife-edge. Every death and birth, every successful hunt, every chunk of coal burnt to ashes, every grain taken from food stores in the unfathomable depths of winter, is kept in perfect, metered record. Because the truth of a land like Hyperborea, so much further North than anyone should have gone, is that it will snatch everything that is good and warm from you, force its frostbitten fingers into every crack in your plans, your shelter, your safety, and tear it from you like freeze-thaw through a boulder, and leave you, hypothermic and broken, upon the burning snow. There are nights that last days. There are blizzards that last months. There are villages that disappear into the snow and are never seen again.
Perhaps this provides some clarity, then, as to why so many were gripped with such an acute madness when the news broke- perhaps this elucidates even further why so few of them would live or remain to see it through. For whichever upstart could reach out and grab it first, there was liquid gold beneath the ice- the question remained, however, if he could still hold onto it as the impossible North began to eat away at everything he held dear.
They came, in desperate masses, to the city of Fell. Fell was not the largest city in Hyperborea, it was not the most important, and it was not the capital- but it was further northward, pressing deeper into the ever-darkening cold, than any other city in the world. The blistering, maddening hostility of Fell cannot be understated. She stood teetering on the edge of the world, in stark defiance of her limits, a monument to both the deep hubris and undying determination of her people. A wrought-iron giant, magnificent and blazing, clinging to the white tundra like a stubborn grease stain; Fell was a young city, aching for industry, half a million people thronging through her streets, fighting against the elements. Smog pours from chimneys, forges run hot deep beneath the city, and fires blaze all along the streets, keeping intransient Fell smoldering, staving off the great freeze, sealing cracks as the ice splinters through them, just barely grasping her existence from the jaws of the North.
Through the center of Fell, along the high streets where black facades rise stories-high, a river cuts the city in two. This is the Corione, a paradoxical beast flowing inland from the Ocean, which joins with the Stoll and the Sea to the West, and races screaming up from the South, where the waters are calm and blue and beautiful, through jungle, woodland, plains, and steppe, before tumbling over the cliffs into the tundra and slicing through Fell like a jack-knife. Its frigid waters arrive bearing gifts- dead fish, ships with metal faces, and news of warmer lands. Three dozen miles to the North, the Corione reaches its terminus, an impossibly deep and desolate lake. Within the walls and streets of Fell, it is bludgeoned by the streets into the rough shape of a canal, and is constantly at war with itself in much the same way that Fell is constantly at war with Hyperborea. The casualties of this war are the shattered ice sheets it carries with it; as each one crystallizes, it is rent asunder by the ceaseless currents, or the ice-breaking boats, or the streetlamps and hearths burning alongside it. The waters of the South, against the cold of the North, against the fires of the city- the Corione can never rest. The city of Fell can never rest.
And so, in droves, up the Corione and the Stoll and along the vast frozen plains, the big-city oil magnates, sleazy news-hawks, and leaden-shovel laborers came to Fell. The truly inconceivable seclusion of the promised bounty must be emphasized here- Fell, by all accounts is an incredibly remote city. The next major hub is almost two hundred miles to the South; some say her sheer septentrionality is bordering on blasphemous. And yet, any man hoping to sink his talons into the treasure trove waiting out there in the snow would have to journey one hundred miles deeper into perilous Hyperborea, into the far reaches of the world where lakes hide beneath kilometers of ice and your breath freezes in your lungs.
This nightmare did not trouble the minds of the fools in their boats and chariots as they pressed Northward, the promise of oil money so lucrative and all-consuming it struck any inkling of concern or forethought from their minds. No, there would be no time for consideration, no time to pause and think how quickly and thoroughly Hyperborea was going to flay the cashmere greatcoats and fine lambskin gloves from their flesh- only gold glistens behind the eyelids of the wealthy businessman as thundering black stallions carry him upward, to the wonderland of infinite profit and shining snow that he dreams of. At the end of the road or the river, icy damnation waits hungrily for him with open arms.
There was oil, and soon there would be blood.
#plush.txt#my writing#thraeposting#fantasy#fires of the north#LOOK I DID A DIVIDER AND EVERYTHING ARENT I FANCY!!!!#read my thing pleaseeeee im really proud of it and there WILL be more
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Heartbreaking news out of north Gaza today
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We write to inform you that renowned journalist Ismail Al-Ghoul and cameraman Ramy El-Rifi of Al-Jazeera were murdered just a few hours ago by the occupation. They were going out to document the scene of another bombing attack, when they were deliberately targeted by the occupation. Footage provided by journalist Osama Al-Ashi in the immediate aftermath of the attack shows that Ismail and Ramy were murdered with targeted precision weaponry, meaning the occupation watched them, waited for them, and executed them in cold blood (warning: graphic footage).
Ismail and Ramy have been documenting the genocide at immense personal cost since the 7th of October 2023. They were previously kidnapped and tortured by the occupation, but survived and continued to remain in north Gaza and document crimes against humanity. They have had many narrow escapes, and today, the occupation was finally successful in its illegal goal of assassinating these prominent journalists.
When western journalists hand-wave their suppression of the IOF’s atrocities in Gaza by claiming no journalists are “allowed” in to report, remember these men. Remind them of these men. These men who lost friends and loved ones, who suffered immensely, and yet chose to remain and continue documenting the genocide against their people. They join the ranks of more than 150 Gazan journalists who were murdered by the occupation to hide its crimes and retaliate for speaking the truth.
حسبنا الله و نعم الوكيل
أنا لله و أنا اليه رجعون
God suffices us and he is the best disposer of affairs. We belong to God and to Him we shall return.
Keep fighting for Gaza. Don’t stop talking about north Gaza.
#gaza#gaza genocide#gaza strip#gaza under attack#free gaza#from the river to the sea palestine will be free#north gaza#palestinian genocide#stop genocide#gaza journalists#palestine journalists#palestinian journalists#ismail al ghoul#ramy Eyad rify#Ramy Eyad Al rify#gazan genocide#gaza under bombardment#gaza update#gaza under fire#gaza under siege#gaza under genocide#stop gazan genocide#stop gaza genocide#stop the genocide#stop israel#end israel's genocide#save north gaza#31 July 2024#save gaza#save palestine
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The category is: A boy who has all of the makings of a great king, forced upon a war to save his scattered family, that dies before seeing them together again:
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(they also have great hair, face cards that never decline, and daddy issues)
#got#game of thrones#a song of ice and fire#asoiaf#hotd#house of the dragon#house targaryen#house stark#jacaerys velaryon#jacaerys targaryen#robb stark#king in the north#clara bow#type shit
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I've been slowly obsessing more and more about asoiaf fashion in the past 6 month, and really developing in details how it would look in different regions, classes, etc (the North being the one I have the most complete picture on). And I wanted to put some of this to paper instead of endlessly turning it in my head before I go to sleep. Usually when I costume design it is confined to a specific character, I've never done like worldbuilding fashion design, but idk asoiaf really gets me going.
So here's the North ! I could have kept going and added more stuff, but if I try to spew all the shit that's in my head I'm never gonna finish this x) So I focused mostly on great houses/nobles fashion for this. Maybe I'll do a sheet for smallfolk or practical clothing like battle armour after I'm done with all the kindoms. I already have to continue the anti AI quest...
More asoiaf fashion
#my pinterest inspo board for this has grown sooo absurdly large - like nearly a thousand pics with 20 subfolders and so lol#I think I've seen every medieval/renaissance fashion pic on the website#like now I often recognize specific pinterest inspos on other people's asoiaf art lmao#asoiaf#a song of ice and fire#asoiaf fashion#valyrianscrolls#the north#house stark#fanart#my art#bear with me tho like I said I've never done worldbuilding costume design and I'm certainly not an expert in historical clothing#this is just for fun
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Book! Jon snow is the only thing I’m thinking abt…
#my art#rkgk#poridraws#fanart#jon snow#got#asoaif#a song of ice and fire#game of thrones#got fanart#asoif fanart#asoif/got#asoiaf#a song of ice and fire jon#I WILL NEVER FORGIVE HBO FOR BUTCHERING HIS CHARACTER AUGHHH#he’s SOOO SOOO((((#I AM FOR THE KING OF THE NORTH!!!
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"When Canada was fighting wildfires in Alberta, Quebec and British Columbia in 2023, blazes that would go on to eventually burn more than 45 million acres, more than 2,000 American firefighters helped extinguish the flames.
Now, Canada has returned the favor. It is sending air tankers and dozens of its own battle-tested wildland firefighters to Los Angeles, its government said. Air tankers can deliver thousands of gallons of fire retardant or water to wildland firefighters on the ground.
More personnel and equipment from Ontario, Quebec and Alberta are ready to be mobilized, according to government officials. And a team of senior technical staff members from British Columbia will fill specialized roles, the government said.
“We both know that Canada and the United States are more than just neighbours,” Prime Minister Justin Trudeau said on X on Friday. “We’re friends — especially when times get tough. California’s always had our back when we battle wildfires up north. Now, Canada’s got yours.”
Mexico quickly followed, dispatching a crew of firefighters early Saturday to help the huge deployment already underway.
“We are a country of generosity and solidarity,” President Claudia Sheinbaum said on X. Ms. Sheinbaum said that the group was carrying “the courage and heart of Mexico.”
Before departing Mexico City for California, the Mexican firefighters held the flags of California, Mexico and the United States on the runway.
Mexico’s civil protection agency said that “cooperation has no borders” and that the mission reaffirmed “its solidarity with the people of California.”
Gov. Gavin Newsom of California said that he was grateful for the support from both countries."
-via The New York Times, January 11, 2025
#la fires#los angeles#pacific palisades#fires#wildfire#southern california#california fires#mexico#canada#united states#north america#firefighters#california#good news#hope
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Backgrounds? *puts on sunglasses* I don't know her.
My favorite girl Sansa, here to eat lemon cakes and take names.
#asoiaf art#asoiaf fanart#sansa stark#a song of ice and fire#game of thrones#got fanart#procreate#house stark#costume design#queen in the north#my art#sansa art#illustrations#fanart#drawing my favorite girlie again bc I had to be at my parents' place for a few days and stole my dad's ipad to play w procreate#this is a lil rushed/not as finished as i want it to be for that reason#me beginning this drawing: 'I'm going to not go crazy on the details like I usually do'#me trying to finish this drawing: '...ah beans'#there's supposed to be big fancy embroidery on her long sleeve but i ran out of time#anyways this is just one big giant 'what can i do with procreate' experiment#bc i am still a newbie with it#the show should have had FANCIER CLOTHING#still salty about this#based on my earlier circassian sansa sketch#I am beginning to loathe drawing fur but it is inescapable with my stark kiddos
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The Queen of the North, Sansa Stark with her sworn sword, her sister, Princess Arya Stark
#a song of ice and fire#art#artwork#digital art#fantasy#game of thrones#sansa stark#arya stark#house stark#queen of the north#artists on tumblr#winterfell#queen#northern queen#the north remembers
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Duty
Robb Stark had kept his oath to house Frey and married you as a result allowing him to win the north’s independence however he now has to live with the sacrifices of duty and must find out if duty is truly the death of love.
word count: 3,992
CW: MDI 18+, slight smut, p in v, angst, arranged marriage, infidelity, childbirth, unhealthy dynamic, toxic relationship? open ending, pregancy, not proofread!
Robb Stark x Frey!Reader
Masterlist | part two
dividers by @zaldritzosrose
Duty.
The word rang in your head as you stared at your husband.
He was yours; you were his but as his eyes wandered across the hall you knew he was not entirely yours.
A mere hour into your marriage and you already felt the strain of an unfaithful husband.
The longing looks he gave her form across the room were the looks you had wished to feel.
You were the youngest daughter of Walder Frey and his sixth wife, Bethany Rosby, and though your older sister Roslin was often called beautiful, you were considered beautiful. It was the one-word Robb stark had said when he saw you, the only word he had said to you beside your wedding vows.
He hadn’t even spared you a glance since the ceremony, most of your conversations had been with his mother, Catelyn. She had been kind, having been the one that choose you as his bride. But you knew it was not your beauty that she chose you for, it helped of course, pleasing Robb if only by a little. You were neither smart, cunning or wise. You were simple normal, with no special skills to sway the eyes of suitors or to persuade your husband. She choose you, the often forgotten daughter, with no influence or means to gain any, for that reason alone.
It was clear to anyone the marriage and alliance was an unwanted one. Especially to your husband and the woman he loved.
He did not dance with you once, offering no words beside the necessary pleasantries, the kindest act he seemed to do was forbade the bedding ceremony. Though there was little bedding done that night, though the act was done, he neither spoke a word to her or stayed the night. And from the whispers she heard the next day it seemed he had gone to her swiftly after.
He had left after that, though he did not say goodbye, or offer to write to you. You were simply left with his mother, set to journey to the Winterfell.
The journey as not long, taking less than two weeks before you saw the peak of Winterfell’s towers. It was a wonderful sight, having never left the twins, and rarely being allowed outside. Seeing the castle of Winterfell was a freeing experience. There seemed to be endless halls, some bare and empty allowing the privacy you had never once had in the twins. The god’s woods was even more magnificent than you had expected, it expanded for acres, with endless trees and countless springs waring both the gods woods and the castle. You felt some peace here, but you had also never felt more alone.
You were looked at as an outsider, talked to as one, and it was clear you were unwanted.
As the moons passed, you felt even more alone, you only heard about Robbs victory through his mother, the one person who didn’t talk to you with resentment.
Then you realised you had yet to bleed since your wedding.
And the word duty once again rang in your head.
You were pregnant, a fact that made you seemed more welcome, people were kinder to you. And yet you felt more alone, suddenly surrounded by people who only cared for you know you cared the heir.
The heir to a man you did not know, the heir to a man who scorned you on the day of your wedding for another woman. He didn’t even have the respect to at least act like a loyal husband.
You had done your duty, but he had not.
For it seemed she was also pregnant.
You were far along in your pregnancy, near eight moons when you heard the news. The news that was accompanied by your husband’s victory. And the norths independence. Yet you felt little joy only envy at the news of her pregnancy. Envy that she gets to know him and he never once tried to let you know him, even in the fleeting hours they did have together.
The next month was lively, the keep full of servants and lords from all over the north preparing for their kings arrival. The planning of feasts and several other northern events to be held. And you did not know what to think, you had long craved to know your husband, but he seemed to want to forget you even existed, and even more so when he arrived, with her on his arm and a babe in hers.
You bowed your head, clutching your belly protectively as if their presence would harm the babe somehow, and greeted him “husband.” You spoke plainly, not in joy, nor as a move of possessiveness towards her.
He nodded his head, going to greet you in the same fashion but stopping himself at the sight of your belly. “wife” he said in shock, as if the very idea of you being pregnant or here for that matter was shocking.
You smiled, a forced smile and spoke softly, “come, husband we have much to discuss”
She had stayed put, looking lost among the faces of Winterfell.
Though you had started out a stranger those first few months, after your pregnancy was announced, though you had at first received false pleasantries to win your favour, a time that made you feel even more alone. Now you felt rather comforted by the halls and the people with in it.
You took your time to win over the people inside the walls, though you never felt that you could truly be yourself ,as you did not know entirely who you were anymore, but none the less, you no longer felt like a stranger, even Catelin had even started to heavily involve you into the running of Winterfell, and her kindness became truer to you, even more so when news of your husbands bastard spread.
Your basic and natural kind behaviour had one the loyalty of many of the people of the north as they sneered at her, shunning her away as they welcomed the victors back from war.
And from the kind smiles you received as you walked the halls to your chambers, chambers the lord and lady of Winterfell had traditionally shared. It had not crossed your mind about were you would know sleep. Never having shared the bed with another, not knowing what it is to share a bed, let alone with a man. It was also your belongings that filled the room, your tapestries and art, your nicknacks and clothes. His had either gone with him or remained in his old chambers, but know she supposed he was fully with in his rights to move in and perhaps even throw her out.
She did not know if he weas cruel enough to do so, or kind enough to let her stay. You only knew of him through the view of others, mainly his mother. An opinion you held with restraint, seeing as what mother would not love her son.
He stared at you awkwardly once you entered the room, the realisation of never once talking alone coming to light for you both.
“your with child?” he asked after a moment.
You snorted “of course” you said “though I doubt you care much, seeing as you already have a babe”
“i…” he looked down ashamed, “I do care, though….though we barley know one another… I am your husband”
You snorted again, “really? And where exactly has my husband been? Not once have you acted like one, the only husbandly act you had done was to take my maidenhead!” you were mad, for so long you had been nice and kind, acting as if you cared not for his actions and now months of anger was finally spilling out of you.
He coughed awkwardly, clearly not expecting you to say something like that, especially as one of the first things you had said to him.
“i…I you are right?” he said, clearly unsure of what exactly to say, “I should have said something to you, told you of Talisa”
Talisa.
So that was her name.
“or at least have waited until after we were- “
“until it wasn’t our wedding day?
“yes” he looked down, “though I… I will admit I do not regret loving her”
Loving her.
Hearing it hurt, though you supposed you had to right to feel hurt.
You huffed, your eyes downcast, “must you admit it so freely? I understand we do not know each other, that you did not want this marriage, but it is our duty, and I…” you took a deep breath, looking up at him “I want respect, I want to be treated like a wife, and not” you couldn’t bring her self to say it, you were a woman scorned, scorned by your husband and yet he was a stranger, and in his eyes you hadn’t earns the respect you deserved. “…not like-“ you didn’t say it, he did.
“Like a duty?” He looked at you, “because that’s all that you are, a duty” he seemed to sneer “I once desired a marriage of love and then I was told I would have to marry a Frey” he hissed the name, ‘at first I hoped to find love with my wife, a wife I would not little say in, then I met her” you knew he didn’t mean you, how could he? “Talisa” he whispered “I love her more than I thought possible, and then I met you.” He shook his head “ you are beautiful, more so than she I will admit that, but I do not love you, and I very much doubt I ever will.”
“Why?” You asked, stopping him before he could saying anything more.
He swallowed “how can i? I do not know you-“
“Then get to know me!” You interrupted, moving closer to him, “we are to have a child of our own soon, do you not want to know its mother?”
He shook his head, “let me finish.” He spoke sternly, causing you to step back again.”I do not know if I want to know you, I have her and she for months was all I needed…” he stopped talking then, looking at you, as if hoping you would interrupt despite his words.
“And now i… she had a babe, our babe, a girl. And perhaps some part of me feels And perhaps some part of me the guilt of loving her, despite my duty to you.”
You shook your head, “I am your wife, you should feel more-“ you clutched your belly in pain, as a contraction hit.
“are you alright?” He asked moving to you.
“I have been having them all day, it is nothing to worry about” you said as you shook it off only to be hit with another contraction.
“Are they meant to come that close together?” He asked worry clear in his voice.
You sneered “I don’t know you’re the one with a bastard, weren’t you there went she gave birth?”
“I… no we haven’t been together since the wedding”
You laughed “oh Im so sorry our marriage was such a inconvenience for your mistress”
He said nothing at that, leading you to believe that perhaps he wanted to continue his relationship with her and she was the one to stop it.
“I’ll fetch the midwives” he spoke suddenly, leaving before you could say anything.
Soon you were on your bed, a midwife between your legs telling you to push.
It was just you and them, woman you had never met, wishing you had met your mother so that she could be here for you and not strangers.
And it seemed the gods were cruel as they sent her in, she walked in saying she was a healer and was simply there to help, and by the worried looks the midwives gave her it seemed you needed it.
She went to touch you, and you flinched back.
“No” you whispered.
“The babe is breached” she said hoping to sway you, but the constant shaking of your head caused her to bite her lip a concerned look filling her face “I have experienced with breached briths, I can help you” she insisted.
“No” you simply said again, but this time she ignored your pleas, moving to sit on the bed and take your hand in hers.
You tried to pull your hand back but she only held on tighter, and leaned in.
“Please let me help you” she begged “neither of us want to be in this situation and I am only trying to help you”
“What so the gods aren’t cruel on you as they have been on me?”
She laughed “sort of I suppose, but also because I have caused you enough pain and wish to mend it.”
You looked at her, she was sincere, it seemed she too hated the situation they were both in, trapped feeling like the other woman, “fine” you gritted out.
She nodded “I need to move the babe” she said placing her hand on your belly and started to turn the babe.
The pain was terrible, the want to push and being unable to and the feeling of you babe moving inside of you, and then finally she said you could push, after that is was swift, and before you knew it cries filled the room, and your baby was placed in your arms, a boy, an heir.
“Congratulations” Talisa breathed, “he looks just like you” she said softly, you smiled nodding you head. He did, he lacked all the Tully features Robb ware, though it was clear the stark genes that skipped him wen to the babe, as he had a tuft of Black hair, and a part of you hoped for the grey eyes most Starks bore. But other than that he was every bit yours, your eyes and nose, he was all you.
“Should we fetch the king?” A midwife asked, and you shook you head,
“no, he knows I am here, let him come to me.” You said, as Talisa went to stand, “thank you,” you whispered.
She smiled “just because we are tied in the same way does not mean we must hate one another” she said, looking at you kindly, and you hoped she was right, because you hated the envy you felt towards her.
“We shall speak on this soon, but for now I shall rest” you said, focusing your attention back on your son.
“Of course,” she nodded. Leaving the room.
Robb did not visit you for ten days. No one did really.
It was just you and your son, Cregan. A stark name, though not a common one, you may know little history but the little you did know was about the dance of the dragons, and about Cregan stark. He was your honourable and loyal, traits you would raise your son with.
“Hello” you heard suddenly, as you Cregan was placed in your arms.
It was robb.
“Finally come to meet your child?” You sneered.
“I apologise” he whispered, coming towards you and looking down at your child. “I had matters to deal with”
“of course” you nodded not that you could see how he had not once found the time to visit you and your child.
“I here you named him Cregan” he spoke, softly smiling down at your son.
“yes, I thought it to be a good stark name.”
He nodded, caressing the babes head. “I had hoped to name him Eddard, or Ned…. After my father” he said softly.
“Was that what you were going to name your daughter had she been a boy?” You asked, though your tone was neither dripped with envy or anger, you had said it so nonchalantly, as if you cared not for the answer.
Both the question and your behaviour confused him, he did not know what to make of you, your personality, or how to even start a marriage with you. Or even if he wanted to have one with you. “Yes” he mumbled, “though we ended up naming her Minisa, after my mothers mother” he spoke with such a tenderness, and you realised you could never compete with her, no matter how kind she was, you hated her.
Hated that she was the only reason you could never know your husband, who he was and what he liked. How he looked when you woke up beside him or how it felt for him to hold you lovingly. Your heart broke at the future you would never have.
“Leave” you demanded, pulling Cregan away from Robb. As if Robb being close to him would hurt him the same way Robb being apart from you, had hurt you.
“What?” He asked in alarm.
“I can’t do this” you said, “I can’t, every moment of our marriage has been shadowed by here, I am your wife, not her”
“gods, I know that, and I hate it” he angry spoke back, “we both know neither of us had a choice in who we marry!”
“but you have a choice in who you love, why not try and love me!”
“Because you’ll never be her” He pulled back completely, “I do not want to know you, I only ever wanted her and I will only ever choose her.”
“then leave!” you spoke as tears fell down your face, “I will move out and into one of your over holdings as soon as I am able, and we will not have to put up with this farce any longer”
“good.”
And just like that any hope for a marriage was lost, your son would only know your face and not his fathers for years to come.
As the years passed your rarely saw your husband. With Cregan now five, all hopes of giving him another sibling had disappeared, as you and Robb could scarcely spend longer than a few minutes in a room together.
And though Cregan got along well enough with his siter, Minisa, a part of you resented her. Resented how she was Robbs whole world and Cregan wasn’t.
perhaps it was because you had pushed him away so thoroughly.
That your relation to his heir caused him to resent your son in turn.
And perhaps he hated you more now that Talisa had passed.
The birth of their second child had killed both mother and babe.
Robb had raged.
For months he seemed to only act in anger.
And then it all stopped.
He seemed to return to normal, expect he know insisted he do his duty to you.
Duty.
You hated the word.
Especially as you lay now on the bed, his cock thrusting in and out of you and your moans filling the room.
There was no emotion but hate in the way he fucked you. As if you were the very reason for her death.
As if you were the guilty one in the marriage, when all you had ever done was your duty. As if you existing had caused her death, as if you had killed her and not the winter sickness.
He seemed to fuck you as if you had killed her, pounding into you at a relentless pace.
There was no part about it that could make it seem like he was making love to you.
Not as he bent you over a desk, or pushed you to the floor and hicked up your dress.
Or as he barged into your room as your maids were preparing you for bed, dismissed them and instantly started fucking you.
You hated it. But you also loved it.
Hated how gave you every opportunity to top him, and not once had you.
You happily let him fuck you.
Enjoying the touch of your husband.
The pleasure of sex.
“fuck” he groaned as he came, releasing you from his vice like grip.
He rested his head against yours, catching his breath.
It was rare he fucked you on your back, often choosing you to face away from him as he fucked you.
You pulled back from him awkwardly, waiting for what always happened next.
Him leaving.
But this time he didn’t leave.
Perhaps it was because it had been over a year since her death, over a year since her name was mentioned.
Perhaps he had somehow forgiven you for whatever crime you had committed against him in his head.
He had been more…pleasant?
He had been able to spend time in your company without shouting or yelling at you for no reason.
He had had spent more time with his son, though perhaps that had been because you had taken his daughter under your care.
It hurt almost to care for her but apart of you loved her. Having always wanted a daughter for yourself, and for so long believing you would only ever have your son, Cregan. She was the image of her father, with little trace or her mother on her features. She was quite and shy though she liked you. Perhaps it was because Talisa had always been kind to you, at least to your face.
“the maester tells me you are pregnant” he spoke, as he moved to lie beside you.
“what?” you asked in shock. You had only just found out for yourself this morning.
He sighed, turning to look at you, “he said you were pregnant, about three moons” he said as he moved to make himself comfortable in your bed. “i..yes I am…I only just found out this morning”
“as did I”
It was awkward, neither of you knew how to talk to the other. Neither of you had cared to try until now.
you too moved to make yourself comfortable, tucking your self into bed, and turning your back to him. He sighed before moving towards you, blowing out the candle and wrapping his arms around your waist.
“what are you doing?” you asked.
“sleeping with my wife” he said as if it was obvious. You had never shared a bed with a man, and feeling him pressed against you felt strange. It wasn’t comforting, nor was it uncomfortable.
“oh”
“oh?” he mimicked.
“why?”
“well…we are husband and wife it is time we started acting as such”
You huffed, “ we have been husband and wife for nearly six years now and not once have you slept in my bed.
“well that’s going to change” he said, and before you knew it you were both fast asleep.
The next few months had been so different from the previous years.
Though you had not stopped your previous duties as lady of Winterfell. It seemed now with Robb instant on being a dotting husband you had more duties.
He had moved into your chambers, though you supposed they were rightfully his.
He insisted on taking all your meals together, walking in the gods woods every day together.
He had become kind, and for those few moons you thought perhaps you could grow to tolerate his misgivings and be husband and wife.
Then he called you, “Talisa”
He had said it in passing, not even noticing it at first. And then he saw how your froze and realised his mistake.
He had sighed your name in apology.
But you had ignored him. And realised that perhaps it would be better, not to have hope that you were more than a duty to Robb.
That to him you would never be her. Never be the wife he wanted, only his duty.
It didn’t matter how much he liked to play pretend. Giving you flowers and sweet kisses on your cheek. Deep down you knew you could never forgive him, never find the love and happiness you had long craved, that you deserved.
That you would be a wife of duty, and love was always the death of duty, and duty is the death of love.
And he would never stop loving her.
authors note: this took me 3 weeks to write because i couldn’t figure out to make it have a happy ending. it was far to angsty and i couldn’t justify her forgiving him.
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Robb the Lord
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Fires of the North
CHAPTER 3: NORTHWARD
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Lazare Doromos, far and away the most famous person to ever arrive in the elusive city of Fell, had been in hiding for six weeks. He had arrived just prior to the Gossamer and the Company, with no great fanfare- on an utterly silent and starless night, the least magnificent of all the Doromos’ carriages slipped in through a lesser-used gate, unnoticed by all but a lone gatekeeper and the policemen keeping the night’s watch, and from there had seemingly disappeared entirely. This was, for a creature who stuck out like a tiger lily in the tundra, no small feat. Undoubtedly, any ordinary man who carried himself with the flamboyance and vividity of Lazare Doromos wouldn’t have lasted a day in the cold, mechanical city of Fell- fortunately for him, Lazare was no ordinary man.
There are a strange sort of folk, far to the South, who are not so bound to the physical laws of material reality as much as they are vaguely influenced by the circumstances of their existence. Where the sun burns warm no matter the season and the mangrove trees grow tall, there are men who may be parrots at noon and stags by sundown, women who dance ethereal through the myriad shapes of the world, and folk of all kinds who waver pleasantly through in-betweens and gray areas. They are the chimera, the many-faced, the shapeshifters, and legends of their existence pulse from North to South like a great web of color and light. The loftiest of all these legends had just arrived in technicolor glory on the doorstep of Fell, thousands of miles from where it began. It was with all the great bluster of myth at his heels that Lazare Doromos, Prince of the Many-Faced, disappeared without a word into the leaden streets. For six weeks, the city’s keenest eyes spotted an odd white hare here, a piebald raven there, or a stranger of some impossible description stumbling into a tavern and asking bright-eyed for a glass of whatever the barkeep liked best. None of them thought to connect these incidents to the man now standing out in the snow in an ensemble of at least four different colors of velvet, although they were all undoubtedly his own. At last now, he stood in broad daylight as though he were as solid and stark as the city itself, and broke into a grin.
Doromos stands, entirely by choice, just shy of six feet. If he so pleases, his chestnut curls fall just at his chin but are swept back from his startlingly blue eyes, his ears draw up to a small point, and his mandibular canines protrude ever so slightly, a delightfully paradoxical combination of features that appears on no worldly creatures but Doromos himself. This frivolous form is grounded within eight or nine layers of clothing, each of a different material and color, he carries himself like a peacock with tail at rest, surely waiting for some future Spring to disregard his outer layers and become truly ethereal. He approaches a stunned Marshall with a ridiculous, waltzing gait that walked the line between elegance and parody in the manner that only a well-trained nobleman can. Indeed, Lazare was from wealth, vast and unimaginable quantities that had been in his family for longer than the city of Fell had stood against the North. Perhaps one of his distant ancestors had been some prototypic businessman, who’d made his fortune selling the wheel shortly after its invention, and that from that catalyst family Doromos had gone on to become great and prosperous. His greatest of grandfathers was credited almost entirely with the creation of Brink, capital of the land of the Shapeshifters, and each one of his forefathers in turn had upheld that legacy until finally, Lazare Doromos was struck by a flight of fancy and left it all behind.
Three opulent decades of luxury had left Lazare with a remarkable temperament. Having experienced almost no worldly hardships, he was largely unaware of the challenges of modern life, and floated through each day with a capricious vivaciousness that charmed and confounded everyone who met him. He had gone through life untarnished by the bitter horrors of capital, stumbling blissfully into adulthood by following whatever captured his attention at the moment. Lazare was entirely unskilled in most trades and industries, but through sheer luck and a genuinely willingness to learn he muddled his way through impulse after impulse. Above all, Lazare’s naivety had forged at his most fundamental level a deep, unfailing kindness. His golden heart fluttered desperately against the harsh winds of Fell now- whether or not the brutal North could claw apart his altruism is still yet to be seen.
Like a brightly colored child’s doll dropped idly in the snow, Doromos offers a ridiculous little laugh and says, with a melodic lilt to his voice, “Sincerest apologies, my friend- did I startle you? I thought that I might admire these- well, these beautiful horses. Might I ask- are they yours?” His manner of speaking was rambling and winding, such that it took at least twice as long as necessary to get anywhere, leaving the listener in a pleasant stupor all the while.
Marshall seemed to snap back to some awareness, away from the gaudy stranger and toward what he knew to be true: “Yes, sir. They’re mine. Raised ‘em all myself, from foals.”
Lazare’s eyes lit up. “Oh, how delightful! They are truly glorious, good sir. Could I perhaps inquire as to what your name might be? I don’t believe we’ve met.”
“Marshall, sir. Jack Marshall. Assistant to Harkannon Hull, if you’re lookin’ to know.”
“Harkannon Hull! Now that’s a name I’ve heard before. He’s become quite the talk of the town, hasn’t he? Although I’m afraid, Marshall, my friend, that I may end up butting heads with him in due course- I believe we both have our eyes on that lovely little oil field. Of course, you seem like a fine fellow, and I wouldn’t want to besmirch you, but I do believe I could do something truly great if I do win this little race already taking shape, and I do apologize sincerely if what could very well be a great friendship winds up tarnished by our respective businesses.”
Jack stared calculatingly at Lazare, utterly dumbfounded. The flowery and wandering language he was being presented with meshed poorly with the simple boundaries of his mind, and he stood there for a while, struggling to comprehend what this odd man was trying to tell him, before giving up wholeheartedly and nodding in simple agreement. “Um- yes. Sir.”
“Now, the horses!” Lazare continued, offering a comforting smile to Marshall to bring him gently back into the loop. “This one, here, he is just glorious.” He approached the furthest horse to the left, entirely black and entirely glorious, and placed a gentle hand on its nose- the animal swung its head away and pinned its ears to his neck. “Could you tell me about him?”
“That’s Kismet, sir.”
“Kismet! What a name!”
“Thank you, sir. He’s a good horse- young and on the shy side, but good. Strong” Jack had been closely watching Lazare’s truly poor handling of Kismet, and finally decided to intervene. At his slightest touch, the horse calmed, and Lazare smiled with wonder.
“He is perhaps the finest stallion I have ever had the pleasure of meeting.” Marshall thought about interjecting to add that Kismet was in fact a gelding, and that he was a far sight from the finest in this stable alone, but thought better of it just in time for Lazare to suggest- “I’d love to buy him, if you’re selling. How much?”
Marshall was knocked back by this. “Buy him? Are you sure?” Hesitantly, he amended, “Are you sure you know your way around a horse?”
“Quite sure, good fellow! See, my lovely wife and I traveled to this delightful town several weeks ago, in a chariot drawn by eight black horses just like your Kismet here. Tragically, though, only seven of them made it through the gates- sweet Sugar Belle was attacked while we rested one night and by morning the scene was so ghastly we had no choice but to go on without her. I’d love so dearly to have a full team for the journey home- and you seem like such a fine fellow, Mr. Marshall, you ought to have a bit of money in your pocket. Name any price at all, and I’ll take him.”
“That- that’s very kind of you, sir. I appreciate your offer, honest, I just need to think on it for a while, if that’s alright with you.”
“Of course! Please, take all the time you need- I wouldn’t want to rush you. In all honesty, Jackie my boy, the matter of your Kismet is far from why I came out here in the first place.” Lazare smiled blithely at his own impulsivity. “Tell me, what would a man like myself have to do to find himself a place on this survey trip I hear you’re taking?
And so it was that the surveyors, rather delayed, set out from Fell into the open jaws of Hyperborea. There were six of them in all- Jack Marshall, a rather frigid older man named Albert who would book his passage home shortly after returning, two guides from the city of Fell that had made the trek twice before, a supplemental Fell native from the city council with the sole objective of record-keeping, and Lazare, having taken the shape of the albatross to glide high above his companions. For four days, they pressed Northward, watching the vanishingly small window of sunlight wane further still and the temperatures plunge lethally far below zero. To the Southerners, conditions bordered on apocalyptic; to the Northerners, it was routine. On the very first night they made camp, Albert begged his guides to take him back to Fell, that surely none of them would survive the night, that they would freeze to death in their sleep or find a far worse fate further up the trail- the Fell-folk responded, simply, that he could not hope for better weather this deep into the year, and, if he so truly wanted to stop pressing North, he could put a bullet through his head right here to lighten their burdens- Albert quieted down after this, and spent the remainder of the journey in frightened silence.
As the party pressed on into the ice fields, the North slavered and hungered for the warmth of the ignorant. On the third day, the frosty exoskeleton over the snow shattered under Marshall’s feet and he slid waist deep into freezing death, pulled back out by his companions just short of half his body becoming frostbitten beyond the point of salvage. On the fourth day, Lazare was struck clean from the sky by gale force winds and spent seven hours resetting broken bones before he could take flight again. Regardless, they pressed onward. The guides would no longer let them sleep at night for more than an hour at a time, for fear of freezing to death- the nights had already become so long they were beginning to swallow the precious few hours of sunlight remaining. On the fourth day, bitter and frozen, the travelers and scouts arrived in the promised land, and before their eyes beheld glorious nothingness. The patch of snow looked no different from every horizon they’d seen for the past four days, although a guide promised that all of their fortunes roiled beneath the surface. As the surveyor grasped a small lead pencil in her thick gloves and took out her ledger, patrolling the edges of the field with a calculating eye, Albert snapped at one of the guides.
“You’ve led us nowhere! I- I could’ve died, and for what? Some snow? I’ve seen nothing but snow for four blasted days!”
The guide, whose name was Nils, replied simply, “You ask to be brought, and we bring you. Promised nothing.”
Jack and Lazare watched on as Albert huffed and paced around restlessly against the blizzard. Lazare turned his gaze outward to the oil field and shook his head with an open-mouthed smile. “It is beautiful, wouldn’t you say? In its own way, of course.”
Marshall hummed. “I s’pose.”
“You can almost feel it. Well, leastways I can- the incredible promise of opportunity just beneath our feet, almost bubbling to the surface.” He clapped Jack Marshall on his shoulder. “Yes, my good sir, something great is going to happen here. Whether the credit ends up on my shoulders or with your Company, or- or perhaps someone else entirely- only the Stars know now, but I can say with utter conviction that this, this ground will be hallowed.” Lazare seemed overcome with the grandeur of it all, perhaps morose for the first time in his life- certainly, as he looked out at the endless blanket of white he found himself overwhelmed by something, out there in the snow. His eyes stayed fixed on the horizon like a hare just caught in the sights of a wolf.
Jack said nothing. He just watched, and wondered, and waited for the journey home.
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Meet Mohammed
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Mohammed @mohammedalhabil2000 lives with his mother Ibtisam, his sisters Noha, Abeer, and Nour. They are a loving family, but have had more than their fair share of struggles. Mohammed’s father was martyred by the occupation in its 2014 aggression. Ibtisam and Omar, Mohammed’s older brother, supported the family themselves for many years. Then, in December 2023, Omar was martyred by the occupation while he and Mohammed were out gathering firewood. Mohammed was severely injured in the same attack.
This was not the last time Mohammed was injured by IOF violence. Mohammed has been injured on four separate occasions, resulting in his left leg being critically wounded. He had to have a full cast put on, rendering him unable to move any part of his leg.
He undergoes regular physiotherapy when it is safe enough to travel to the clinic, but unfortunately this is not enough to heal his wound. Mohammed is going to require intense, specialized treatment in order to fully heal his leg and regain as full of function as possible. Due to the occupation’s systematic destruction of Gaza’s medical infrastructure, this cannot be done in Gaza.
Mohammed will need to travel abroad to treat his leg, which will be a complex and expensive proposition. Just passing from Gaza into Egypt costs thousands of dollars, not to mention the costs of lodging, food, medication, and medical appointments. He is trying to raise funds so that when the border reopens, he will be able to arrange passage into Egypt, and begin his journey to fully healing.
His family is already struggling to survive, relying on mutual aid for food and other basic necessities. They lost their home due to IOF attack, and none of them are able to work. This means Mohammed has no way to pay for his travel and treatment costs without your support.
Please help Mohammed be able to afford the treatment he needs
Thank you❤️❤️
#ibtisam al habil#gaza#gaza genocide#gaza strip#gaza under attack#free gaza#from the river to the sea palestine will be free#north gaza#palestinian genocide#aid for north gaza#gazan families#gaza gfm#gaza gofundme#stop gazan genocide#stop gaza genocide#stop the genocide#end israel's genocide#save north gaza#gaza under siege#gaza under fire#ngu*#aid for palestine#aid for gaza#palestine aid#gaza aid#relief for gaza#gaza relief#palestine relief#relief for palestine#mutual aid
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Through Storm and Silence
Hi my darlings,
I have decided to post my new Cregan x Reader fic a day early because I have started to hate it the more I look at it. I did change it since posting the teaser, so my apologies to everyone that is expecting that beginning. This fic is long, sad, and DEAD DOVE: DO NOT EAT, READER'S DISCRETION IS ADVISED!! (Please let me know if this makes you feel things, my prozac stops me from knowing if this is Actually Sad)
Summary: The loss of your first pregnancy has you shattered in unspeakable ways, and Cregan does his best to comfort his Lady Wife.
✨My Masterlist✨
🖊️ My AO3 🖊️
WC: 13.4k
Warnings: Pregnancy loss, depression, fem!reader, isolation, intimate care, just sad fluff (or hurt/comfort if you wanna get technical)
Cregan Stark x Wife!Reader
MDNI!!!
The fire in your chambers had long since burned out, leaving the hearth cold and lifeless. Its ashes, once bright with promise, were now a bleak monument to what had been lost. The flames that had warmed you, like the fragile spark of life that had stirred within you, were extinguished, leaving nothing but emptiness behind. Shadows sprawled across the stone walls, bending and twisting in the faint moonlight that filtered through the frost-covered window. The light was weak, just enough to sharpen the edges of the cold that seeped into the very bones of Winterfell—and into yours.
The chill wasn’t just in the air; it lived in you now, settling deep in your chest, pressing against the raw, hollow ache that had taken root there. This cold wasn’t the familiar bite of winter—it was sharper, crueler, born from the absence of the life you had carried. The fragile hope that had grown inside you, so small yet so powerful, was gone. Its absence left a void so vast it consumed you.
You couldn’t bring yourself to move from the high-backed chair by the window, where you sat motionless, staring into the dark expanse of night. The frost on the glass distorted the view beyond, transforming the swaying trees into ghostly silhouettes, their barren limbs stark against the sky. They reminded you of how you felt—stripped bare, fragile, and exposed to the harsh winds of grief.
The gown you wore clung to your body, its once-delicate fabric now feeling oppressive. Days ago, it had been chosen with care, a garment meant to hold the quiet anticipation of the life you carried. Now, its weight pressed against you like an accusation, its seams digging into your skin, sharp and unforgiving. It didn’t just hang on you—it felt as though it was marking you, reminding you of the absence that had replaced what you once held so dear.
You hadn’t changed out of it. The thought of doing so felt too heavy, too meaningless. To strip it away would be to acknowledge the finality of what had been lost, and you couldn’t face that yet. The woman who had smoothed its fabric with pride, who had worn it with a small but steady joy, was no longer there. All that remained was the crushing weight of who she had become—a shadow wearing the remnants of something she could no longer be.
Your trembling hands rested in your lap, fingers curling into the fabric as if trying to find something to hold on to. A faint breeze stirred from the window, its icy touch brushing against your skin like a cruel reminder of the emptiness inside you. You shivered, but still you remained frozen, the weight of Winterfell pressing down on you, heavy and unyielding.
The world outside went on, its voices and footsteps distant and indifferent. The quiet of the castle was unbearable, the oppressive stillness broken only by the occasional creak of wood or the faintest sigh of wind. It was as if the walls themselves conspired to remind you of your solitude, of the storm raging within you while the world beyond carried on, oblivious.
Tears slid silently down your cheeks, warm against the icy stillness of your skin. You made no effort to stop them, nor could you if you tried. They came endlessly, flowing in a slow, aching rhythm that mirrored the grief clawing at your chest.
You were alone with the memory of what had been—a fragile, fleeting spark of life that had slipped through your fingers. And now, with nothing but the cold to hold you, it felt as though you might never be whole again.
The rhythmic thud of boots against stone drifted faintly from the courtyard below, a distant murmur of life pressing onward. A horse’s whinny cut through the air, joined by the indistinct hum of voices carried on the wind. The world beyond was alive, indifferent, ceaseless. But none of it touched you. It all seemed unreal—muted fragments of a life you could no longer claim, slipping through your fingers like mist. You stood at the edge of it all, a silent shadow, severed from the world that churned on without you.
Time had abandoned you, or perhaps it had conspired against you, trapping you in this endless moment while everything else moved forward. The castle walls, so full of life, seemed oblivious to your sorrow. Their quiet betrayal, their unshaken permanence, was unbearable.
Inside the room, the silence pressed down on you, thick as the weight in your chest. It should have been a comfort, this room. Once it had been. But now its quiet corners and heavy drapes felt suffocating, its walls tightening around you with every passing hour.
You clenched your fists, the delicate fabric crumpling beneath your trembling hands. Tears welled, spilling before you could stop them, tracing hot, aching paths down your cheeks. You couldn’t stem the tide, nor did you try. The gown bore the stain of your despair, but it was nothing compared to the jagged wound that bled unseen within.
The whispers were always there, clinging to the edges of your thoughts no matter how desperately you tried to banish them. They were cruel and unyielding, slipping into every quiet moment, lurking in the shadows of your mind. Their voices were soft but sharp, cutting deeper with every repetition. You should have done more. You should have been stronger. You should have saved him. This is your fault.
They weren’t Cregan’s words, nor the maester’s, nor anyone else’s. They belonged to you, born from the hollow ache in your chest and the guilt that had taken root there. They poured through your mind like a poison, insidious and unrelenting, twisting everything they touched. You could almost hear them in the silence of the room, louder than the crackle of a distant hearth or the sigh of wind through Winterfell’s ancient walls.
No matter how tightly you closed your eyes, no matter how fiercely you tried to silence them, they persisted—a constant, merciless drumbeat. Each word struck like a blow, reverberating through your body, the weight of them pressing down on your chest until you could barely breathe. The air felt thinner with every beat, as though the whispers were siphoning it away, leaving you gasping in the darkness.
You tried to fight them, tried to find some small thread of reason to grasp onto, but they always returned, louder and sharper than before. And the worst part was, some part of you believed them. You clung to the guilt like a lifeline, as though holding yourself accountable might make the loss hurt less. It didn’t. It only sank you deeper into the suffocating pit that you couldn’t seem to climb out of.
They weren’t just whispers. They were chains, binding you to the pain, and no matter how much you struggled, you couldn’t make them let go.
The knock shattered the oppressive silence, a sharp, jarring sound that cut through you like a blade of winter air. For a moment, you froze, the sudden noise startling you out of the haze that had enveloped you for days. The weight in the room, in your chest, had been so heavy, so all-encompassing, that you’d almost forgotten the world outside existed. The knock was a cruel reminder that it did, and that it still demanded something of you.
You stiffened, every muscle tightening as though bracing for an unseen blow. Your breath hitched, thick and shallow, your throat closing as if even the act of breathing might betray you. You didn’t want to answer. You couldn’t. What could you say to him? What could you possibly offer, except more of this broken, hollow shell of yourself?
The knock came again, softer this time, a gentler plea that only seemed to make the silence more suffocating. And then his voice followed, threading through the stillness. The voice you had once found so reassuring, so unshakably warm, now felt like a ghost of itself—steady, deep, but laced with something unfamiliar. Fragility. Desperation.
“It’s me,” Cregan said, his words low, insistent. There was a trembling edge to his tone, a quiet urgency that twisted in your chest. “Please, my love. Let me in.”
The sound of his voice sent a fresh wave of pain coursing through you, tightening around your throat like a vice. You clenched your hands in your lap, your nails pressing into your palms, the sharp sting grounding you in the only way you could manage. The guilt, the grief, the weight of it all threatened to crack you open. If you could just keep still, hold yourself together for one more moment, perhaps the pieces wouldn’t scatter completely.
But the truth was, you didn’t know how to answer him. You didn’t know how to let him in—not into the room, not into the space where your grief lay raw and unguarded. He hadn’t come before. Or maybe he had, and you had been too lost to hear him, too consumed by the darkness to recognize the sound of his voice. You didn’t know which possibility was worse—that he had stayed away, honoring the space you had begged for, or that he had tried and failed to reach you.
Neither was kind. Neither was something you could bear.
His knock had stirred something inside you, but it wasn’t hope. It was the sharp, aching reminder of how much you had pushed him away—and how much you had wanted to. Because if he saw you like this, if he saw how fractured you had become, you weren’t sure you could survive it. And yet, even as you tried to steel yourself against the sound of his voice, it lingered, wrapping around you, pulling at the frayed edges of the wall you had built between you.
“I’ll wait as long as I need to,” Cregan’s voice broke through the silence, quiet yet unyielding, like the steady strength of the man you had once leaned on without hesitation. “I’m not leaving you alone in this.”
His words were meant to soothe, to offer comfort, but they only deepened the ache in your chest. The tenderness in his tone was unbearable, like a hand reaching out to touch a wound too raw to bear. The sting behind your eyes flared, tears threatening to spill over once more. But you refused to let them fall. Not again.
You had cried enough—alone, in the suffocating stillness of the night, when the walls of Winterfell seemed to close in and the weight of your loss crushed you in the darkness. You had let the tears fall in those moments when no one could see, when no one could judge you for the depth of your grief. What good had they done? They had left you feeling even emptier, as though each tear carried away a piece of yourself until there was nothing left.
What would tears accomplish now? They couldn’t undo the pain that had carved itself into your soul. They couldn’t bring back what you had lost, couldn’t fill the gaping void that echoed inside you. They wouldn’t erase the crushing guilt that clung to every breath you took, whispering that you should have been stronger, that you should have done more.
The words you longed to say lodged in your throat, trapped beneath the weight of your grief. Cregan’s steady presence was a balm, but it felt undeserved—a kindness you couldn’t allow yourself to accept. The part of you that ached to let him in warred with the part that wanted to push him away, to protect him from the broken, fractured pieces you had become.
But still, he waited. And still, you remained silent, the battle within you raging on.
The door remained closed, an unyielding barrier between you and Cregan, the space between you stretching into an insurmountable chasm. Your lips stayed pressed tightly together, as if the very act of speaking would shatter the fragile hold you had on yourself. Words felt dangerous, too revealing, too raw. So, you stayed still, frozen in the quiet, every part of you locked in place. You didn’t move. You didn’t breathe. You didn’t respond.
Maybe if you stayed silent, he would leave. Maybe if you sank deep enough into the well of your grief, the guilt would loosen its grip on your chest. Maybe if you let the silence consume you entirely, the pain would finally relent. But even as the thoughts flitted through your mind, you knew they were lies. The grief, the guilt, the unbearable ache in your chest—they weren’t things you could escape. They were woven into you now, so tightly that nothing—not time, not distance, not even silence—could unravel them.
Deep down, you knew nothing would ever be the same again. The fragile thread of hope that had once connected you to the world had snapped, leaving you untethered, adrift. No amount of hiding, no fortress of silence, could change that.
The silence stretched on, thick and suffocating, pressing against you like the cold that had seeped into your very bones. It wrapped itself around you, a crushing weight that left no room for breath or thought. It wasn’t just in the room—it was in you, winding through every broken part of yourself.
Cregan’s steps broke the stillness, each one deliberate, careful, as though he feared his presence might break you further. The sound of his boots against the stone was soft, almost hesitant, but it still felt too loud, too intrusive in the suffocating quiet. He was close now. You could feel his steady presence, warm and grounding, even through the chasm you had built between you.
But still, you didn’t move. You didn’t turn to meet his gaze, didn’t even lift your head. Your heart was too heavy, weighed down by guilt and sorrow so profound it felt like a physical ache. You couldn’t bear the thought of looking at him, of letting him see what you had become—shattered, broken, unrecognizable even to yourself.
You were afraid. Afraid of what he might say. Afraid of the gentleness you might hear in his voice, the love you might see in his eyes, when you felt you deserved neither. Afraid that if he saw you like this, saw the depth of your ruin, he might try to put you back together. And you weren’t sure you could survive being pieced back together only to fall apart again.
He paused, his boots just inside the door, hesitating as though waiting for you to make the decision he couldn’t. As though he wasn’t sure if crossing the distance you had carved between you would help—or only deepen the divide. The silence between you was palpable, stretching wide and unyielding, a vast chasm neither of you knew how to bridge. For a fleeting moment, it felt as though the entire world was holding its breath, caught in this fragile, suspended moment.
And then, after what felt like an eternity, he stepped forward. Just one step, careful and deliberate, the sound soft against the stone floor but carrying a weight that echoed in the quiet. His presence, once a comfort you had never thought to question, now felt too close and yet too far all at once. He moved with a kind of reverence, each step slow and measured, as though approaching something sacred—and fragile.
It was almost unbearable, the way he moved toward you as if you were still the woman he had once known. As if you hadn’t been hollowed out, stripped of the light you had carried, replaced by a grief so consuming it felt like you were drowning. You couldn’t look at him. You didn’t dare. But you felt him, his quiet strength radiating through the cold space, the air between you shifting, growing warmer as he drew closer.
“My love…” His voice was soft, a gentle murmur that carried through the silence like the brush of a hand against frayed fabric. There was a weight to his words, though—something raw and aching, unspoken but undeniable. His concern was threaded through every syllable, tangled with the love he couldn’t seem to put into words. It was the kind of love that refused to be turned away, no matter how fiercely you tried to shut it out.
Still, you didn’t answer. You didn’t even turn toward him. Your eyes stayed fixed on the floor, unblinking, unseeing, your breath shallow and uneven as if even acknowledging him might break the fragile hold you had on yourself.
But his presence pressed gently against the edges of your grief, like a tide brushing against jagged rocks, refusing to retreat. You couldn’t face him, couldn’t let him see the ruin you felt you had become. To turn to him would mean letting him see the cracks, the unbearable weight of your sorrow—and you didn’t know if you could survive his gaze.
Your gaze remained fixed on the frosted window, your eyes tracing the jagged, crystalline patterns of ice etched into the glass. They spread like fractures, distorting the world beyond into blurred shapes and muted shadows. The courtyard below lay buried beneath a thick blanket of snow, its stark silence mirroring the hollow stillness inside you. It looked untouched, serene, as though the world itself had withdrawn, retreating from the weight of your grief. But the chill that gripped you had nothing to do with the winter outside.
This cold was deeper, more insidious. It had rooted itself in your chest, in the fragile places you had once protected. No fire, no warmth, could touch it. It wasn’t a chill of the skin but of the soul, spreading through every part of you, leaving you numb yet unbearably aware of the ache it carried.
Your fingers moved restlessly, pale and trembling as they tugged at the fabric of your gown. The motion was small, unconscious, but relentless. You picked at loose threads and seams, tearing at the delicate material with a quiet desperation. It was all you could do. The stillness of your body demanded an outlet, something to echo the storm raging within you. Each thread pulled free, each tiny rip in the fabric, felt like a hollow attempt to give shape to the suffocating emotions you couldn’t put into words.
You couldn’t stop. You didn’t want to stop. The motion kept the grief from swallowing you whole, even as it frayed the edges of your gown. The tears in the fabric mirrored the fissures in your heart, small and splintering, growing with every passing moment.
Each movement, each tug, was a silent rebellion against the unbearable weight that threatened to crush you. The storm inside you had no outlet, no escape, and the restless motion of your hands was the only way to keep from falling apart completely. Rest felt impossible. Stillness only amplified the ache, the sharp-edged sorrow that had taken over every part of you. Rest would mean surrendering to it, drowning in the pain you weren’t sure you could survive. And so, you tore at the fabric, as though unraveling it might somehow loosen the tight grip of grief around your chest.
But deep down, you knew it wouldn’t. Nothing could.
Cregan didn’t press you, though his silence was as heavy as the grief that hung between you. He didn’t demand answers, didn’t push for words you weren’t ready to give. Instead, he moved closer, his footsteps slow and measured, each one deliberate, as though the air itself might break beneath the weight of his approach. It was as if he were walking through a fragile dream, afraid that one wrong step might shatter it entirely.
Each careful step spoke of his restraint, his quiet struggle to respect the space you had carved out for yourself, even as it tore at him to see you like this. To see the woman he loved, his steadfast, fierce-hearted wife, lost in a pain so profound that even the strength of his presence couldn’t seem to reach her.
He stopped a few paces away, his form solid and steady against the shadows that filled the room. For a moment, he said nothing, the silence stretching again between you, an invisible barrier neither of you knew how to cross. And then, his voice came again, softer this time, carrying a tenderness that wrapped around you like a quiet plea.
“I know you’re in pain,” he murmured, his words low, heavy with the weight of his own helplessness. The emotion in his voice twisted in your chest, each word landing with quiet precision, like drops of water against a stone worn thin. “But I can’t help you if you won’t let me in.”
The pause that followed was almost unbearable, his voice trembling just slightly as he added, “Please, look at me.”
The plea lingered in the air, hanging between you like a fragile bridge you weren’t sure you could cross. His words carried no demand, only a quiet yearning, a love so raw it pressed against the edges of your sorrow, threatening to unravel the fragile defenses you had built around yourself. But you stayed where you were, frozen, your gaze locked on the frost-covered window, as though the jagged patterns of ice could hold you together in a way that his love couldn’t.
You didn’t move. His words reached for you, a lifeline cast across the vast, aching distance between you, but you couldn’t take it. You couldn’t meet his gaze, couldn’t let him see the broken pieces of who you had once been. Not when those fragments felt so sharp, so jagged, that even you couldn’t bear to look at them. The woman who had once stood beside him, who had promised him a future filled with light and hope, was gone. In her place was this hollow shell, weighed down by grief so consuming it left no room for anything else.
Your hands fell still in your lap, the nervous fidgeting replaced by an unnatural rigidity, as though any movement might crack the fragile dam holding everything inside. You stared down at your trembling fingers, clutching at the fabric of your gown not to tear it, but to stop them from betraying you further. The storm within you churned violently, and the stillness felt like the only thing keeping you from falling apart entirely.
The ache in your chest grew sharper, a suffocating pressure that made it hard to breathe, hard to think. It wrapped around you like a vice, pulling you deeper into yourself, away from the voice that tried to reach you.
The air between you felt heavier with each passing second, thick with unspoken words and the weight of all you couldn’t bring yourself to say. It pressed down on you, isolating you further, trapping you in this cocoon of silence where your grief felt too vast to share, too all-encompassing to explain.
You could feel Cregan’s presence, his unwavering patience like a quiet flame, waiting for you to let him in. But that only made the guilt burrow deeper, sharper, as though it might carve you out completely. He was waiting for you to open the door you had closed so tightly, waiting to shoulder the pain you were too afraid to show. But you couldn’t.
You couldn’t let him see you like this—shattered, hollow, and drowning in the sharp edges of your grief. If you turned to him now, if you let him see the raw ruin of what you’d become, you weren’t sure you could survive it. And so, you sat there, silent and unmoving, unable to cross the distance that had grown between you.
Your shoulders trembled, the motion small at first, barely noticeable, before it grew into a tremor that rippled through your entire body. Without warning, your head dropped, your face cradled in your trembling hands. The tears that had lingered just beneath the surface for so long finally broke free, spilling over in a torrent that you couldn’t stop. They came hot and unrelenting, each one carving a path down your cheeks, a relentless reminder of just how much you had lost.
You tried to stifle them, swallowing sobs that clawed their way up your throat, desperate to hold onto some semblance of control. But the tears came anyway, unchecked and unforgiving, a flood that swept away the fragile walls you had tried so hard to build. The warmth of them against your skin felt like a cruel mockery, a vivid contrast to the hollow, icy ache in your chest. You resented them—resented how powerless they made you feel, how impossible it was to push them back, to push any of it away.
You couldn’t. The grief was too deep, too consuming. It wrapped around you like a tide, pulling you under, dragging you further and further away from everything you had once been.
Behind you, Cregan watched, his gaze softening as his heart broke for you in ways he could neither stop nor fully understand. He stood frozen, torn between the overwhelming need to comfort you and the fear that his touch might only deepen the chasm that stretched between you. The sight of your shoulders trembling, of your body folding in on itself as though the weight of your sorrow was too much to bear, left him helpless.
He had always been your shield, your steady foundation, but now he could do nothing but stand there, watching as the woman he loved was consumed by a pain he couldn’t ease. It was a kind of helplessness he hadn’t known before—a sharp, piercing ache that left him stranded on the other side of the distance you had placed between you.
He wanted to reach for you, to do anything to pull you from the storm that raged inside you. But every tear that fell, every breath that shuddered through your frame, seemed to widen the gulf between you both. It felt as vast as an ocean, deep and unbridgeable, leaving him stranded and uncertain, his love for you a light that couldn’t yet pierce the darkness of your grief.
He moved toward you, each step slow and deliberate, as though afraid that even the slightest misstep might shatter the fragile thread tethering you both. The air between you felt heavy, charged with unspoken words and the raw ache of your grief, but he pressed on, his presence steady and unyielding.
When he reached you, he didn’t speak. Words would have felt too small, too inadequate. Instead, he sank to his knees beside the chair, his movements careful, reverent, as though kneeling at an altar. His presence alone was a quiet comfort, a steady flame in the storm of emotions that had consumed you.
His hand reached out, large and calloused, yet impossibly gentle as his fingers brushed against the delicate skin of your trembling hand. His touch was grounding, warm, and steady—a reminder of the life that continued outside the walls of your sorrow. He didn’t force you to respond, didn’t demand anything from you. His hand simply rested over yours, offering a quiet strength that asked for nothing in return.
The restless motions of your hands stilled beneath his touch, the anxious picking at your gown coming to a halt as his warmth seeped into your skin. It wasn’t much—just the smallest of shifts—but it was enough. For the first time in what felt like an eternity, the unbearable weight of your grief seemed to loosen, if only by the slightest degree.
It was as though his presence alone could hold some of the pieces of you that had fallen apart, his touch a silent promise that you didn’t have to bear the weight of your sorrow alone. But still, the distance between your heart and his felt vast, the walls of your grief too high to climb. And yet, his quiet persistence, his unwavering love, pressed gently against those walls, searching for a way in.
“Let me be here for you,” Cregan said quietly, his voice a low murmur that carried more weight than the loudest declaration ever could. There was a raw tenderness in his tone, so unguarded and sincere that it pierced straight through you, cutting past the walls you had so carefully constructed around your grief. His words were a balm, gentle against the fractured pieces of your heart, but they also undid you, unraveling the fragile composure you had clung to.
The echo of his voice lingered in the heavy silence, filling the space between you with a quiet plea that wrapped around you, impossible to ignore. Each word was steeped in a love so deep, so unshakable, that it made your chest ache with its enormity. A breath caught in your throat, sharp and jagged, as the storm inside you began to crack open.
Before you could stop it, a sob clawed its way out, raw and ragged, tearing through the stillness. You tried to fight it, to swallow the sound of your brokenness, to hold on to what little control you thought you had left. But it was too much. The weight of it all—the loss, the guilt, the unbearable isolation—pressed down on you with crushing force, and you were helpless against the tide.
Your chest constricted, each breath uneven and shallow as the cry escaped you, desperate and guttural. It shook you to your core, your entire body trembling under the force of the emotion that had been building, unrelenting, inside you. The sobs came like waves, relentless and consuming, each one pulling you deeper into the grief you had tried so hard to bury.
And yet, through it all, Cregan stayed. His presence didn’t waver, his quiet strength anchoring you even as you fell apart. His hand remained steady over yours, grounding you against the tempest within, silently reminding you that you weren’t alone—even when it felt like the weight of the world rested entirely on your shoulders.
“I’m here,” he repeated, his voice a balm against the deep, raw wound carved into your soul. The words were so simple, yet they carried a tenderness that made your heart ache even more. His free hand rose slowly, his fingers brushing the damp strands of hair from your face with the lightest touch. His fingertips grazed your skin like a soft whisper, gentle yet steady, a silent promise in every motion. He wasn’t going anywhere. He would stay, even as you unraveled before him.
“You don’t need to hide from me,” he said softly, his voice unwavering, even as the weight of your sorrow seemed to hang heavy in the air between you.
You didn’t respond. His words settled around you, warm and grounding, but you couldn’t bring yourself to speak. There were no words left, no explanations to give, no answers to offer. Only the tears that fell, unrelenting now, streaking down your face like a flood that had been held back for far too long.
The dam inside you had finally burst, and the grief poured out in waves, racking your frame with sobs so raw they felt as though they were tearing you apart. Each shuddering breath brought fresh pain, the ache you had buried beneath layers of guilt and restraint now laid bare. It was unbearable, and yet, in this moment, you didn’t try to stop it. For the first time, you let yourself feel the full weight of the loss, the overwhelming ache that had been clawing at you from the inside out.
And through it all, Cregan stayed. His presence didn’t falter, didn’t try to pull you from the depths of your grief. He didn’t offer empty reassurances or platitudes meant to fix what couldn’t be repaired. Instead, he stayed steady, his hand a constant anchor against the storm inside you, his touch firm yet gentle. He held you in your brokenness, without expectation, without judgment, simply letting you break.
For the first time, the room didn’t feel suffocating. The walls that had seemed to close in on you, threatening to crush you beneath their weight, now felt less oppressive. The silence wasn’t a void anymore; it was filled with something warm, something alive. His presence was like a steady flame in the cold, a quiet reassurance that you didn’t have to carry this alone—not in this moment, at least.
And for the first time, you felt the faintest flicker of relief. It wasn’t enough to banish the grief, not even close, but it made the unbearable weight just a little easier to carry. For this fleeting moment, you weren’t drowning alone.
Cregan watched you as you wept, his heart breaking with every sob that tore from your chest. Each tremor that shook you felt like a blow to him, a pain he couldn’t bear to see yet refused to turn away from. He didn’t flinch. He didn’t speak. He simply stayed, his presence steady and unwavering, a quiet anchor in the storm of your grief.
His hand remained gently over yours, grounding you without words, offering a silent reassurance that you hadn’t asked for but desperately needed. His touch, so steady and sure, was a lifeline in the chaos of your emotions, speaking the things he didn’t need to say aloud: I’m here. You’re not alone.
As your sobs began to slow, the tears that had flowed so freely now reduced to quiet streams, Cregan shifted slightly. His hand lifted from yours, the motion so soft it felt like a whisper. And yet, there was an undeniable strength in it, a quiet promise that he wasn’t leaving, that he wasn’t going to let you fall alone.
“Come on, love,” he murmured, his voice low and soothing, a balm against the raw ache in your chest. The words, though simple, carried a weight of their own—love, patience, and an unshakable tenderness that wrapped around you like a warm embrace.
He didn’t rush you. He didn’t pull you from the chair or try to force you to move before you were ready. Instead, he stayed close, his presence a steady flame against the cold emptiness that had consumed you. Every quiet movement, every gentle word, was filled with care. He was waiting—not for you to be whole, not for the grief to pass, but simply for you to take the next breath, the next small step forward.
Cregan felt it all—the weight of everything you had been carrying, the unbearable burden that had pressed down on you for days. He felt the tremble in your body, the exhaustion etched into every line of your frame, and the grief that seemed to radiate from you like a storm that refused to pass. It was heavy, but he bore it willingly, silently vowing to carry it with you, no matter how long it took, no matter how much of himself it demanded.
“Let’s get you to bed,” he murmured, his voice low and thick with concern, each word carrying the weight of the thousand unspoken emotions he didn’t know how to name. There was no rush in his tone, no expectation—only a gentle insistence, a quiet plea wrapped in love.
His hand stayed firm against your back as he guided you across the room, his movements slow and deliberate, each step careful, as though afraid that anything too sudden might undo the fragile calm that had begun to settle between you. His touch was steady, grounding, a tether to hold onto as the overwhelming weight of your grief threatened to pull you under again.
When you finally reached the bed, he guided you to sit, his movements steady yet hesitant, as though reluctant to step away. His hand brushed lightly over your shoulder, the touch brief but deliberate—a fleeting attempt to offer something words couldn’t convey. But as his eyes lingered on you, seated and so visibly burdened by your grief, something shifted in him. It wasn’t pity—it was a deep ache, an unspoken understanding that settled heavily in his chest.
He forced himself to take a step back, his instincts warring with his restraint. He wanted to stay close, but he knew this moment wasn’t about him. You needed space, even if only enough to draw a breath, to navigate the depths of what weighed on you without intrusion.
“I’ll be right back,” Cregan said softly, his voice low, a quiet murmur that carried more emotion than he could name. His gaze flickered to you, filled with a concern so raw it nearly stopped him in his tracks. “I’ll have a bath prepared. You need to rest—and take care of yourself.”
You didn’t answer. There were no words left, only the faint hum of your breath as you sat still, your hands resting in your lap. As he turned, the smallest movement caught his eye—a barely perceptible nod, as fragile as the first stirrings of a winter thaw.
It was subtle, almost imperceptible, but it spoke volumes. It wasn’t permission, nor surrender, but something quieter. A thread of trust, unspoken but present. And though the gesture was small, it was enough for him to continue, his steps quiet but purposeful as he left the room to prepare what was needed.
As Cregan stepped toward the door, the soft click of the handle as it closed behind him seemed to echo through the room, sharp and final. The sound sliced through the oppressive stillness like a cold wind cutting across bare skin. For a fleeting moment, everything seemed to hold its breath. The door’s finality hung in the air, and with it, an even deeper silence settled around you.
The space he left behind felt vast, as though the room itself had stretched in his absence, a yawning chasm you couldn’t cross. You slumped against the headboard, your body sinking further into the mattress, drained of the strength to do anything but exist in the quiet. The exhaustion in your bones was total, a kind of weariness that no amount of sleep could touch.
You had hoped for peace in the quiet, but it wasn’t peace that came. It was weight—heavy, stifling, pressing down on your chest, pinning you to the bed. The room around you seemed to breathe with the creak of old wood beneath you, a low, familiar groan that filled the silence alongside the soft hum of your own breath. And yet, none of it filled the aching void that stretched endlessly inside you.
It wasn’t that you wanted Cregan to return. His presence couldn’t undo what had been broken, couldn’t turn back time or mend the wound that had hollowed you out. But his absence carried its own kind of pain, sharp and relentless, a reminder that life would never return to what it had once been.
Still, you stayed where you were, motionless, surrendering to the stillness that wrapped around you. The weight pulled you deeper, like a tide dragging you under, but you couldn’t summon the energy to fight it. Your body was too tired, your mind too spent, and so you simply let yourself sink into the waiting quiet, waiting for nothing in particular, only the endless passing of time.
Cregan’s footsteps echoed through the stone corridor, quick and determined. The chill of Winterfell’s air was sharp, seeping through the heavy walls, but he barely noticed it. His thoughts were focused elsewhere, running over what needed to be done and how little he could seem to do to ease the storm inside you. Each step carried the weight of his resolve, even as his chest tightened with the ache of seeing you as you were—exhausted, hollow, a shadow of the woman who had once met life with unshakable strength.
He reached the servants’ quarters, his broad frame filling the doorway as his voice broke the relative quiet of the space. “Prepare a bath,” he ordered, his tone low but firm, brooking no hesitation. “And make sure it’s hot. Bring fresh linens, too.” He paused for a moment, his hand pressing briefly against the rough stone wall beside him as he steadied himself. “And food,” he added, glancing between the startled faces of the servants. “Simple, but warm—and enough to sustain her.”
The urgency in his voice was tempered by the restraint he’d forced upon himself. He didn’t bark the commands, but the sharp edges of his words made it clear how quickly he expected them to act. The servants, accustomed to the steady, measured demeanor of their lord, exchanged quick glances before hurrying to carry out his instructions.
Cregan lingered for a moment as the scurry of footsteps and murmured acknowledgments faded down the hall. He stayed still, his hand curling into a loose fist at his side, his breathing measured but heavy. The weight of the past days bore down on him like the snowdrifts against Winterfell’s walls. He could feel the strain of it in his chest, in his shoulders, in the way his jaw ached from holding his emotions in check.
He replayed the image of you sitting on the edge of the bed, your shoulders slumped under a grief that seemed to consume you whole. The tremble in your hands, the distant look in your eyes—it was enough to twist something deep inside him, a pain he couldn’t name and couldn’t shake. But he couldn’t allow himself to falter. Not now.
Straightening, he turned on his heel, his boots striking the floor with purpose as he made his way back through the dimly lit corridors. His thoughts remained focused, calculating what else could be done to make this moment, this night, a little less unbearable for you. He couldn’t take away the grief or the pain, but he could ease the harsh edges of it, if only for a little while.
When he passed another servant, he stopped briefly, his voice softer but no less insistent. “Make sure there’s firewood brought to the hearth. I want the chamber warm.” The servant nodded quickly, moving to comply, and Cregan pressed forward, his steps quickening as the ache in his chest deepened.
As he neared the door to your chambers, his hand brushed the rough stone of the wall beside him, grounding himself in its cool solidity. He paused for the briefest of moments, drawing in a breath to steady the emotions that threatened to spill over. The bath would be ready soon, the food prepared and brought, but none of that felt like enough.
Nothing ever felt like enough.
With one final breath, he opened the door quietly, stepping back into the room where you waited, fragile and silent, the weight of your grief filling the air. He didn’t say a word as he crossed the threshold, his steps careful, his presence steady, bringing with him what little he could offer.
The servants were already hard at work preparing the bath, their quiet movements echoing softly in the background, but none of it mattered to Cregan. His eyes found you the moment he stepped into the room, and the sight of you—the broken posture, your head bowed, shoulders slumped—made his breath hitch in his chest.
You sat so still, as though the grief had hollowed you out and left only a fragile shell in its place. Your movements were barely there, faint and withdrawn, blending into the dim shadows that seemed to wrap around you like a second skin. To him, it felt as though you were slipping further away, piece by piece, retreating into a darkness he couldn’t fully reach.
Cregan didn’t speak right away. He didn’t ask you to move, didn’t press you for words or force you to acknowledge him. The silence in the room was heavy, thick with the weight of everything unsaid, but it was yours. It was the only thing you had chosen in days, and he would respect it, even as it clawed at his chest to see you like this.
But respect didn’t mean standing idly by.
He stepped toward the bed, his movements slow and deliberate, each one measured with a care that spoke of his understanding. Your pain was something fragile, delicate, and he approached as though the wrong move might fracture the brittle calm you had managed to hold onto. When he reached you, he knelt down beside the bed, lowering himself to your level.
His hand extended toward yours, palm up—a quiet offering, an invitation to let him in, to let him share some small part of the burden you carried. His fingers lingered, close enough to touch but not forcing contact, allowing you the choice to accept or reject the gesture.
“Let me help you,” he murmured, his voice low, filled with a quiet but unshakable determination. Each word was gentle but carried the full weight of his resolve. He wasn’t asking for much; he wasn’t asking for words or answers. He was simply offering himself.
“I’m not leaving, love,” he continued, his tone soft but firm, the steadiness of it cutting through the stillness. “Not until you’re taken care of.”
There was no flourish to his words, no attempt to dress them up. He had never been a man of many words, but the ones he chose always carried meaning, each syllable weighted with purpose. He couldn’t fix what had been broken, couldn’t mend the wound that had torn through you, but he could do this. He could stay. He could make sure you were cared for, even if you couldn’t bring yourself to do it alone.
His hand stayed where it was, steady and patient, waiting for you to decide.
His words lingered in the air, their quiet warmth brushing against the edges of your sorrow. Cregan didn’t press you, didn’t rush you to respond. Instead, he simply stayed where he was, his steady presence a quiet assurance that you wouldn’t be left adrift in this moment.
After a few breaths, he gently helped you to your feet, his hand firm at your back as he guided you toward the chair by the hearth. “Let’s sit here for a while,” he murmured, his tone calm and patient, as though the rest of the world could wait.
The flames in the hearth flickered faintly, their light casting soft shadows across the walls. You sank into the chair with a heaviness that seemed to seep into your very bones, your gaze falling to the fire as it crackled softly. The minutes stretched on in silence, broken only by the occasional creak of the old floorboards and the muffled sounds of the servants working quietly in the background.
The faint hum of their activity filtered through the stillness. Logs were added to the hearth, the fire growing brighter and stronger, its warmth beginning to fill the room. The linens on the bed were stripped and replaced with fresh ones, their crisp folds smoothed with precision. The rhythmic sound of water being poured into the bath drifted faintly from the adjoining room, mingling with the scent of lavender as steam curled softly into the air.
Time passed slowly, each moment marked by the subtle changes around you. The room grew warmer, the air lighter, as the servants completed their tasks and slipped out with quiet efficiency. Through it all, Cregan remained close, his movements purposeful but unhurried, his gaze flicking to you every so often to ensure you were still with him, still grounded.
When everything was ready, he returned to your side, crouching down beside you. His hand found yours again, his touch steady and sure as he said, “The bath is ready.”
With deliberate care, he helped you to your feet once more. Each step toward the steaming tub was slow, measured, and supported by his arm at your back, his presence grounding you as you moved forward. The weight of exhaustion still clung to you, but the quiet warmth of the room and the promise of rest seemed just within reach.
The room was a haven of comfort, a stark contrast to the cold, oppressive silence that had held you captive for so long. Flickering candlelight danced across the stone walls, casting soft, shifting shadows that softened the room’s edges. The gentle sound of water filling the bath added a steady rhythm to the quiet, a soothing backdrop that eased the weight pressing against your chest. The warmth of the room wrapped around you like a long-forgotten embrace, the promise of relief so close you could almost feel it seeping into your bones.
But it wasn’t just the room that brought this fragile sense of solace. What truly began to thaw the ice that had settled in your heart was Cregan. His presence, steady and grounding, was a force that anchored you without demand or expectation. His eyes, unwavering and filled with a tenderness you hadn’t thought yourself capable of receiving, never left you as he guided you forward. Every movement he made carried with it a quiet purpose, an unspoken promise that you were not alone in this moment.
When you reached the edge of the bath, Cregan’s hand was firm yet gentle against your back, steadying you as you lowered yourself into the water. He moved with the same deliberate care, as though the slightest misstep might shatter the fragile calm that had begun to form around you. The warmth of the water enveloped you immediately, wrapping around your tired body like a soft, tender embrace. The heat seeped into your aching muscles, melting away the tension that had clung to you for days, while the chill rooted in your skin seemed to dissolve into the bath.
Yet, even as the water soothed you, it was Cregan’s presence that truly began to untangle the knot in your chest. His quiet care, his unwavering devotion, and the unspoken promise in his every action brought with them a peace you hadn’t known in what felt like a lifetime.
As you soaked in the warm water, something deep within you began to shift. The tears you’d been holding at bay for so long finally began to fall again. But this time, they were different. They weren’t the sharp, jagged tears of grief that had torn through you in your solitude. These were softer, quieter—tears of relief, of release. They came hesitantly at first, as though testing the safety of the space around you, before flowing freely in an unbroken stream. It was as if the warmth of the water and the quiet strength of Cregan’s presence had unlocked something within you, giving you permission to let go of the pain you had carried for so long.
Cregan didn’t speak as you cried. He didn’t try to comfort you with words or fill the silence with empty platitudes. Instead, his hand rested gently on your shoulder, his touch warm and steady, an anchor amidst the wave of emotions overtaking you. His silence was filled with understanding, speaking louder than anything he could have said.
Cregan moved with deliberate care, his touch light but steady, as though the very act of tending to you required all the patience and gentleness he could muster. He reached for the soft cloth resting at the edge of the tub, dipping it into the warm water before wringing it out with precise, measured motions. His movements were purposeful, each one imbued with the quiet reverence he reserved for the things that mattered most to him—things that needed protecting, things that needed care. And in this moment, nothing mattered more to him than you.
You sat there, unmoving, as though the water had become an extension of the emptiness within you. It felt as though you had become hollow, a presence without weight, without purpose. Your eyes, distant and unfocused, stared into the space beyond the water, seeing nothing, feeling nothing. The grief had settled so deep within you that it had worn you down to a mere shadow of the woman you once were. The person who used to laugh freely, who found joy in the smallest of moments, felt so far removed from you now. It was as though the agony had stolen her away, leaving only an echo, faint and fragile, drifting somewhere beyond your reach.
Cregan’s movements didn’t falter, even as he watched the faint tremble in your hands, the distant look in your eyes. He began at your shoulders, the warm cloth brushing over your skin in soft, soothing strokes. His hand followed the curve of your neck, careful and unhurried, as though afraid that anything more abrupt might fracture the fragile calm around you. The heat of the water and the rhythm of his touch seemed to melt some of the tension in your body, loosening the weight that clung to you, though you still felt adrift.
The silence between you remained unbroken, filled only with the faint crackle of the fire and the soft ripple of water. It wasn’t oppressive; it was gentle, a quiet space where words weren’t needed. Cregan’s hands, rough from years of work yet impossibly tender now, moved down your arm, washing away not just the remnants of the day but the faint traces of neglect that marked your solitude.
When he reached your hands, he paused, his fingers brushing over the places where anxious picking had left their mark. His thumb lingered on those faint lines, his touch featherlight, as if trying to soothe both the physical signs of your grief and the deeper wounds that lay unseen.
He continued with the same deliberate attention, his focus unbroken. The cloth moved down your back, across your legs, each motion slow and purposeful, as though he understood that rushing would rob this moment of its meaning. This wasn’t just about cleansing your body—it was about showing you, without words, that you were still cared for, still seen, even in your most broken state.
As he finished, he set the cloth aside, his hand lingering at the edge of the tub for a moment. His gaze softened as he looked at you, his expression full of unspoken tenderness. “Take your time,” he said quietly, his voice low and steady, a quiet reminder that there was no need to rush, no expectation beyond this moment.
And as the warmth of the water embraced you and the quiet intimacy of his care settled around you, the faintest flicker of something stirred within. It wasn’t enough to mend the hollow ache or restore the woman you once were, but it was a start. For the first time in what felt like forever, the weight of your grief wasn’t all-consuming. In the stillness, in the warmth of the water and the strength of Cregan’s presence, you felt a fragile sense of being held—not by words, but by the simple, steadfast care of someone who refused to let you drift away.
You opened your mouth, desperate to speak, to give voice to the storm tearing through you. But the words wouldn’t come. They caught in your throat, heavy and sharp, refusing to escape no matter how much you willed them to. Every syllable you might have spoken was swallowed by the weight of everything you carried inside—the guilt, the loss, the crushing sense that you had failed not just yourself, but everyone who had ever cared for you.
Your chest tightened, the pressure rising until it felt as though you might shatter under it. Your lips closed again, trembling as the turmoil inside you deepened, the ache in your heart becoming more unbearable with every passing second. The silence stretched on, not a reprieve, but an oppressive reminder of how the words remained out of reach, leaving you trapped, drowning in the depths of your own sorrow.
Cregan, kneeling beside you, felt the subtle shift in your body—the faint tremble of your shoulders, the way your breaths grew shallow and uneven, as though your grief threatened to tear you apart from the inside out. He paused, his hands still resting gently on your back, not pressing, not rushing, but simply waiting. He gave you the space to feel, to process the rawness of the emotions tearing through you, even if you couldn’t find the words to name them.
The room was still, save for the faint crackle of the fire and the soft rhythm of your breathing. The quiet wasn’t empty; it was filled with the weight of your sorrow, heavy and palpable in the air between you. Cregan’s gaze stayed fixed on you, his dark eyes steady and filled with a resolve that didn’t waver.
It was as though, in that silence, he was speaking to you without words, telling you that it was okay to feel this, okay to break. His presence didn’t demand anything of you—there was no impatience, no expectation. Only the quiet assurance that no matter how many tears you shed, no matter how fractured you felt, he would stay.
His hands, roughened from years of labor but impossibly gentle now, remained steady on your back, offering a constant, grounding support. He didn’t move, didn’t speak. He simply stayed, his warmth a quiet contrast to the storm raging within you.
Without a word, Cregan reached for the towel resting beside the tub. His movements were deliberate, his hands steady as he prepared to help you. He extended his hand, firm but careful, guiding you to stand. The water rippled softly as you rose, the warmth slipping away as cool air wrapped around you. Without hesitation, Cregan wrapped the towel around your shoulders, covering you fully before helping you step onto the soft rug beside the tub.
He led you to the nearby stool, lowering you gently into the seat. The towel stayed draped around you as he knelt and began drying you, his hands purposeful and precise. Starting at your shoulders, the soft cloth moved over your skin in slow, even strokes, absorbing the water that clung to you.
He worked silently, dabbing at your arms, your back, your legs, each movement unhurried. When he reached your hands, his touch was impossibly light, the towel brushing carefully over the faint marks left behind by your anxious picking. He dried your feet last, the warmth of the towel a small barrier against the cool air around you.
Once he finished, Cregan reached for the folded nightclothes he had set aside. He unfolded the soft fabric, his hands moving with the same deliberation as he slipped the robe from your shoulders. He held the nightgown open, guiding your arms into the sleeves with gentle care. The fabric fell over you, light and soft against your skin, as he carefully smoothed it into place.
Leaning closer, he adjusted the ties at the neckline, his fingers working deftly but without haste. He paused briefly, ensuring the gown fit comfortably, before retrieving the thicker robe that lay nearby. He draped it over your shoulders, its weight heavier and warmer, securing the belt loosely at your waist.
The room was silent save for the faint crackle of the fire and the rustling of fabric. His hands lingered briefly at the edges of the robe, tucking it into place, before he stepped back. He didn’t speak, his focus solely on ensuring you were fully dressed and shielded from the cold.
You sat still, your gaze fixed downward, the weight in your chest as heavy as ever. A tear slid down your cheek, but you didn’t move to wipe it away. Another followed, your breath hitching as the sobs that had been building broke free once more, shaking your frame.
Cregan knelt again, his hands steady as he adjusted the robe around you, the simple action wordless but full of purpose. When he was done, he rose quietly, leaving the space untouched by words, as if to respect the unspoken weight of the moment. The room held only the sounds of your breathing, uneven and raw, and the faint crackle of the fire as the night stretched on.
As Cregan helped you to the bed, his movements were slow and deliberate. One hand stayed steady at your back, the other guiding you by the arm, each gesture careful, as though ensuring you wouldn’t falter. When you were finally seated, he lingered, his hand resting against you for a moment longer than necessary. His gaze flickered briefly to your face, searching for something—perhaps assurance that you were steady, perhaps something unspoken. He didn’t rise, didn’t retreat. Instead, he knelt before you, his broad frame folding quietly to the floor, his presence grounding without intrusion.
His hands reached for yours, large and warm as they wrapped gently around your trembling fingers. His touch was firm but cautious, like cradling something that had already been cracked too many times. His thumb traced over your knuckles, the slow, deliberate rhythm neither asking nor expecting anything. It was a touch that seemed to say everything he didn’t—an offering without pressure, a steadiness that didn’t waver.
The silence between you was dense, weighted by everything that had been left unsaid, yet it didn’t press for answers. The faint crackle of the fire filled the air, mingling with the sound of your uneven breaths, each inhale and exhale catching on the edge of a sob. Your hands trembled beneath his, the effort of holding yourself together visible in every small movement, threatening to break apart at any moment.
When Cregan finally released your hands, it wasn’t to leave you. He moved quietly, rising to retrieve the small plate of food that had been left on the table beside the bed. Without a word, he brought it closer, setting it gently on the mattress within your reach. His movements were careful, unhurried, as though even this simple act demanded the same precision and attention as everything else he did.
Your gaze fell to the plate, and for a long moment, you simply stared at it. Its simplicity felt almost cruel, a stark contrast to the enormity of what weighed on you. Your hands trembled in your lap, the act of reaching for the plate feeling like an impossible task. When you finally lifted your hand, it hovered uncertainly, your fingers stiff and unfamiliar as they wrapped around the fork with halting movements.
The food sat heavy on your tongue, its taste muted and distant. The mechanical act of chewing felt disconnected, each motion foreign and wrong. When you swallowed, a sharp twist gripped your chest, the weight of the action pressing against you with suffocating force. It wasn’t just the food—it was the reminder that you were still here, still breathing, still alive, when everything inside you felt hollow and undone.
A sob tore from your throat, sudden and raw, breaking the fragile quiet of the room. It came without warning, jagged and unrestrained, and with it came the tears—hot and relentless, spilling down your cheeks in an unending torrent. Each one dragged something deeper, more painful, to the surface, leaving you trembling in their wake.
The plate sat untouched as your body folded in on itself, your hands gripping the edge of the bed as though it might keep you tethered to the ground. The sobs wracked through you, your breaths coming in uneven, shallow gasps, and then the words came—soft, broken, slipping from your lips before you could stop them.
“I failed him…”
The words lingered in the air, cutting and bitter. They twisted in your chest like a blade, the weight of them sharper now that they had been spoken aloud. Saying them didn’t ease the ache—it only made it heavier, more real. The truth of them pressed against you, unrelenting, as though it might suffocate you entirely.
Cregan knelt again, his movements measured as his hands returned to yours. His fingers curled around them, their warmth a quiet counterpoint to the trembling in your own. His grip was steady, firm without being constraining, and his thumb resumed its slow, deliberate strokes across your knuckles. The rhythm was calm, offering no pressure, no demand—only an unspoken reassurance that he wasn’t going anywhere.
“You didn’t fail him,” he said softly, his voice low and even, the words carrying the weight of his certainty. “You loved him. That’s all anyone could ask. And I will love you through this, no matter how long it takes.”
The words hung between you, unshaken and sure. But as they reached you, they didn’t sink into the places they needed to. They echoed faintly in your mind, the edges of them dulled by the roar of guilt that refused to be silenced.
Your gaze lifted to his, and his eyes reflected nothing but tenderness, a love that was steady and unflinching. But in their reflection, all you could see was your own brokenness, your own failings laid bare. The ache in your chest twisted sharper, the weight of your perceived failure pressing harder with every breath.
And in that moment, as your heart shattered once more beneath the unbearable weight of everything you had lost, it felt as though the grief might crush you entirely. It pressed against your chest, unrelenting, a force that hollowed you out further with every passing second. The ache seemed endless, a constant presence that had carved itself so deeply into you that it felt inseparable from who you had become.
But even within the depths of that pain, there was something else—something faint yet immovable. It wasn’t hope, not exactly, nor was it solace. It was Cregan. His hands on yours, his steady presence, the quiet certainty of his care—it didn’t lessen the weight of your sorrow, but it didn’t waver either. It was simply there, an unspoken truth that remained even as the grief threatened to consume you.
It didn’t ease the ache in your chest or silence the voice in your mind that told you you’d failed. But in the pit of your broken heart, you knew his love was unyielding, something that had existed long before this moment and would remain long after. It wasn’t a cure for the grief, but it was steady, something that wouldn’t falter, no matter how deep the sorrow ran. And though you couldn’t yet bear to hold it fully, it lingered, waiting in the quiet.
Cregan sensed the shift in you before you could fully grasp it yourself. His gaze softened, the faintest flicker of understanding reflected in his eyes. He didn’t push, didn’t demand anything from you. His hands remained steady, his touch gentle as his fingers brushed along the curve of your cheek in slow, deliberate strokes. The motion was rhythmic, unhurried, an unspoken promise that he would stay—not to fix you, not to pull you from the depths, but simply to be there, however long it took for the storm inside you to rage.
The plate of food sat nearly untouched on the bed, a quiet acknowledgment of his respect for what you needed in this moment. He made no move to bring it closer, no effort to coax you into eating before you were ready. Instead, he let it rest there, unobtrusive, as though understanding that the weight of even that small act might be too much to bear.
The silence stretched between you, but it wasn’t cold or empty. It was a silence that held no expectations, no pressure. It was gentle, patient—a space that allowed you to exist as you were, unfiltered and raw. In that quiet, there was no demand to explain, no urgency to heal. You could simply be.
And though the grief remained sharp, unyielding in its hold, there was a small comfort in that silence, in his steady presence. It didn’t take away the ache, but it gave you permission to feel it without pretense. To sit in the heaviness of your sorrow without the burden of pretending to carry it differently..
As you sat there, wrapped in the quiet warmth of the room, the rest of the world seemed so far away. Yet the overwhelming weight of everything began to creep back in—a steady, suffocating pressure that settled heavily in your chest. The plate of food that had once felt distant now sat in front of you, an unwelcome reminder of what you had lost, of everything you hadn’t been able to protect. It wasn’t hunger that repelled you—it was what the food represented. The simple act of eating felt trivial, almost offensive, in the face of the emptiness that consumed you. The ache within you was too vast, too deep, to be touched by something so mundane.
Your hand moved almost instinctively, pushing the plate away with a motion so gentle it was barely perceptible. It wasn’t defiance or rejection—it was an admission of what you couldn’t give yourself. You couldn’t force yourself to be whole, couldn’t pretend that eating would fill the void left inside you. The untouched plate sat between you and the world, its presence quietly mocking.
Cregan sat beside the bed, his broad frame still and his posture calm, as though any sudden movement might disturb the fragile balance of the moment. His hands rested lightly on his knees, his thumbs tracing slow circles against the rough fabric of his trousers, his gaze fixed on you. He didn’t try to convince you to eat, didn’t say a word. His silence wasn’t empty—it was full of quiet understanding. There was no expectation in his eyes, no disappointment, only a steady acceptance of what you couldn’t yet bring yourself to do.
He didn’t judge you for it. There was no reproach, no impatience. His gaze, steady and unflinching, carried only a gentle acknowledgment of your pain. In the quiet of that moment, his presence eased the sharp edges of your self-doubt, not by removing them, but by offering a space where you didn’t need to fight against them. He had seen you at your strongest, at your best, and now, as he looked at you, he saw you at your most vulnerable. Even here, raw and fractured, he looked at you with the same certainty, the same unwavering care.
He didn’t reach for you. He didn’t touch you beyond the occasional flicker of his thumb brushing against your hand where it rested near your knee. Yet even without words or gestures, his presence spoke volumes. It wasn’t a love that sought to fix you or erase the weight of your sorrow. It was a love that existed without expectation, without conditions—a love that offered itself freely, regardless of how broken or fragile you felt.
Cregan’s gaze didn’t falter, even as you pushed the plate away, even as your breaths grew uneven under the weight of it all. He sat beside you, offering nothing more than the certainty of his presence, the quiet assurance that you didn’t need to be anything other than what you were. In that silence, his love wrapped around you—not as a solution, but as a quiet anchor, holding you steady when everything else felt like it might slip away.
The tears that had once flowed relentlessly began to slow, though the ache in your chest remained—a constant, gnawing presence. It wasn’t something that could be banished or fixed with time or words. It felt woven into the very fabric of your being, an ache that refused to be soothed.
Cregan rose from his seat beside the bed, his movements deliberate as he reached for the plate that sat untouched. He lifted it gently, carrying it away and placing it back on the small table with care, as though even this small act deserved respect. When he returned, his attention shifted to you. He stood quietly for a moment, his gaze steady and unhurried, silently asking for permission as he helped you lie back against the bed.
He lingered as he pulled the blanket up over you, tucking it lightly against your shoulders before stepping back. Without a word, he began to undress, his movements slow and deliberate, as if the weight of the moment demanded nothing less. Once ready, he slipped beneath the covers beside you, the mattress dipping slightly as he settled into place.
At first, Cregan didn’t reach for you. He allowed the space between you to remain, as though giving you time to decide how close you wanted him to be. When you shifted toward him, seeking his warmth, he responded without hesitation. His arm wrapped carefully around your waist, drawing you closer with quiet purpose. His chest pressed against your back, solid and steady, a barrier between you and the cold emptiness that lingered at the edges of the night.
Though the ache in your chest didn’t fade, with him beside you, it felt a little less suffocating. His presence didn’t erase the grief that had hollowed you out, but it steadied you in a way you hadn’t expected. Slowly, you began to let yourself rest, the weight of his arm and the quiet rhythm of his breath coaxing you into a fragile kind of calm.
Your forehead came to rest gently against his chest, the steady thrum of his heartbeat grounding you. The rise and fall of his breathing guided your own, slowing the uneven rhythm that grief had imposed. His warmth surrounded you, cocooning you against the chill of sorrow that still lingered in your heart.
Cregan’s arm tightened slightly, his hand resting against your back as though shielding you from the weight of your pain. He didn’t speak or try to fill the silence with empty reassurances. He simply held you, his presence unshaken, offering quiet strength without demand or expectation.
He could feel the tension in your body, the stiffness that came from holding too much inside. The way you tensed against him spoke of the struggle to keep your grief contained, as though letting it spill out would unravel you completely. He wished he could take that weight from you, even for a moment, but he didn’t ask you to let it go. Instead, he held you tighter, his warmth enveloping you, a silent shield against the sorrow that pressed so heavily upon you.
After a long stretch of stillness, Cregan’s voice broke through the quiet. It was soft and low, almost as if he were speaking to himself. His words carried a thoughtfulness, the weight of a memory he had been holding close, now offered to you in the stillness of the night.
“I remember a time when I was a boy,” he began, his voice low and tinged with nostalgia. “It was a winter, much like this one. We were up in the mountains with my father. The cold was so sharp, so bitter, that even the wolves sought shelter in the trees.” He paused, his fingers gently tracing a slow, absent rhythm on your arm, as if anchoring himself in the memory. “We were hunting, tracking a stag, but my father—he always taught me that you don’t chase after something just because it’s there. You have to be patient. You wait for the right moment.”
His words hung in the air, deliberate and weighted, as though each one carried more than just a memory. It wasn’t about the hunt, or the bitter cold—it was about something deeper. About waiting. About endurance. About knowing that some things take time, even when the waiting feels unbearable, even when the pain seems endless.
You kept your gaze on him, watching as the memory unfolded in his eyes. It wasn’t just the words he spoke—it was the way he offered them, the quiet conviction in his tone. A simple story, yet it carried the quiet strength of patience and resilience, a lesson that reached beyond the moment. It wasn’t about fixing what was broken. It was about surviving. Enduring. And as you listened, you began to understand that this was a truth he had carried with him for a long time—a truth he was now sharing with you.
Cregan’s voice softened even further as he paused, the weight of his words settling into the quiet around you. His hand rested lightly against your back, steady and warm, as though trying to shield you from the storm of your thoughts. His gaze met yours for a moment, unflinching, before drifting away again as he spoke.
“I didn’t get it then, not fully,” he murmured, his tone thoughtful, each word carefully chosen. “But now… now, I think I do.” He exhaled softly, his breath brushing gently against your face, the realization in his words carrying the weight of years. “There are moments in life that feel like they’ll break us. Moments where we feel like we’re lost, as though nothing we do will ever be enough. And in those moments, it’s not what we do to fix it that matters most. It’s how we endure. How we wait through the pain, knowing that, eventually, it will pass. It’s about having the patience to let the hurt come—and the patience to let it leave when it’s ready.”
Cregan’s next words came slowly, each one deliberate, heavy with the weight of his love and the quiet strength he offered. It was as though he were trying to bridge the chasm between your pain and his desire to hold you together, even in the brokenness that surrounded you.
“I won’t pretend to understand the full depth of your sorrow, or the weight that rests in your heart,” he said, his voice low and steady, thick with meaning. The tenderness in his tone was undeniable, each word chosen with care. “But I do know this—you are not carrying it alone.”
He paused, letting the words settle between you. They hung in the air like a fragile thread, something so delicate yet so vital, connecting the raw edges of your grief to the steadfastness of his presence. His gaze remained fixed on yours, unwavering, as though willing you to believe him.
“We are here together,” he continued, his voice softer now but no less certain. “And I’ll stay beside you through it all—no matter how long it takes, no matter how much time you need.”
As he spoke, his arm tightened around you, just enough to make his promise tangible, to emphasize the truth of his words. It wasn’t a solution, wasn’t meant to erase the pain that clung to you so fiercely. But it was constant, unyielding—his presence a silent vow to remain with you, no matter the weight of the sorrow that bound you both to this moment.
You could feel the steadiness in his voice, the raw honesty behind each word. It wasn’t just a story he told—it was a promise, woven into the quiet strength of his presence. It was a reminder that grief, with all its weight and anguish, was not something you had to face alone. And though the journey through it would be long—perhaps longer than you could imagine right now—he would wait with you. Just as he had waited patiently that day in the mountains, not rushing the hunt but trusting that, in time, the right moment would come. Cregan understood the power of patience, the way it shaped everything, even in the darkest of times.
The warmth of his body and the quiet strength of his words began to settle in your chest, providing a fragile comfort amidst the storm of your grief. The ache didn’t vanish—it gnawed at you still, sharp and relentless, pulling at the edges of your heart. But his presence offered something more, something small yet significant: a sense that you didn’t have to face this alone. You were still broken, still lost in the enormity of everything you had endured, but in his arms, there was a flicker of solace. Not hope—not yet. But the smallest inkling that, with time, the pieces might begin to mend.
Cregan wouldn’t ask you to hurry through this pain. He wouldn’t demand anything you couldn’t give. He would wait beside you, steady and unwavering, until the day came when the ache didn’t feel so suffocating. He would wait for you to heal, not by rushing you forward but by standing with you through every difficult step.
For the first time in what felt like forever, you let yourself rest. You loosened the tight grip you’d kept on your grief, just enough to lean into him, to let his arms hold the weight you no longer could. In this moment, with him, you didn’t have to be strong. You didn’t have to understand what came next. You only had to exist, to breathe, and to trust that in the silence between you, the promise of healing was waiting, just like the moment Cregan had waited for in the mountains.
#house of the dragon#asoiaf#a song of ice and fire#hotd#cregan stark#hotd smut#cregan stark x you#cregan fanfiction#cregan stark x reader#cregan x reader#hotd cregan#cregan x you#loss#miscarriage#dead dove do not eat#house stark#lord of winterfell#king of the north#king in the north#wolf of the north#daemon targaryen#rhaenyra targaryen#matt smith#aegon ii targaryen#tom taylor#winterfell#grrm#therogueflame#olive writes#the way this got more notes than the diplomat part 1 is mind boggling
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Stark and co doodles as an excuse to draw more Northern fashion
(from top left : random northern woman just to draw that headwear -my boy robb - sansa - sansa and jeyne gossiping - bran watching jon brood)
#asoiaf#fanart#a song of ice and fire#my art#the north#robb stark#sansa stark#jeyne poole#bran stark#jon snow#asoiaf fashion#costume design#game of thrones#valyrianscrolls#house stark
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In my head,, jon cut his hair after ned died
#when will my style be consistent#is this anything#literally just doodling#I like the top right doodle tho#jon snow#he’s not brooding bc he’s Rhaegar’s kid he’s brooding bc he’s 16#that’s normal trust me#polydoesart#my art#king in the north#house stark#a song of ice and fire#a game of thrones#asoiaf art
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"Dance with me then"
#waymar royce#the others#fanart#asoiaf#drawing#illustration#the winds of winter#a song of ice and fire#game of thrones#asoiaf fanart#valyrian scrolls#art#westeros#the north#beyond the wall#white walkers#night's watch#a game of thrones#grrm#character design#jon snow#agot#grr martin#house royce#prologue#my art
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