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bonky-n-steeb · 4 years ago

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𝐸𝐴𝑅𝑁𝐸𝐷 𝐼𝑇

𝙎𝙏𝙀𝙑𝙀 𝙍𝙊𝙂𝙀𝙍𝙎 𝙭 𝙍𝙀𝘼𝘿𝙀𝙍

𝗦𝗨𝗠𝗠𝗔𝗥𝗬: You chose the wrong side during the Civil War. And now Steve’s back to take what’s his…

𝗪𝗔𝗥𝗡𝗜𝗡𝗚𝗦: Unprotected sex, ANAL SEX, fingering (vaginal + anal), blowjob, captain kink, finger sucking (hand kink? Oral fixation?), PWP (porn with a very little plot... wait who am I lying to? It’s porn.) 𝙈𝙄𝙉𝙊𝙍𝙎 𝙋𝙇𝙀𝘼𝙎𝙀 𝘿𝙉𝙄!

For my sake, your sake, your mom’s sake and for the betterment of the entire world, if you are a minor, please do not read this!🔞

ᴜɴʙᴇᴛᴀ’ᴅ, ᴀʟʟ ᴍɪsᴛᴀᴋᴇs ᴀʀᴇ ᴍʏ ᴏᴡɴ!

It’s filth... absolutely filth, even I can’t believe I’ve written this 🤦🏽‍♀️ I hope to god my mom never finds this and Marvel is probably gonna sue me for writing this.

You stretched out your arms as you laid the bag on the floor. Rubbing your hands, you walked over the surprisingly soft carpet and started the electric fireplace. Despite the cabin being situation in the middle of the taiga, it was very well kept. After all it was Tony’s cabin, it was your fault to expect less.

You had come alone on this mission, and this was the closest safe place, so naturally you had decided to stay there overnight. It was difficult finding the cabin in the snowy terrain overgrown with huge trees but after a few tries with gps tracking, you had found it.

Now there weren’t much avengers left. Half of them had left and the other half was just pulling through. Whenever you thought of the civil war, your heart ached. The loss of your friends was harrowing, but the loss of a certain blue eyed captain was even more painful.

The cabin wasn’t big, it had just two rooms, an electric fireplace, a comfy bed, a clean and functioning bathroom and other necessary amenities. Your legs were aching after walking for so long and you wanted nothing more than to sink into the bed.

But you had a lot of dirt and snow clinging to your tactical suit and you had to wash yourself first. Assorting all your weapons neatly in a corner, you stripped out of your clothes.

You took a warm shower to relax your aching muscles. Dressing up in your comfy, thin and worn out shorts and shirt, you finally climbed up into bed. Just as you were about to drift off into a deep slumber, someone knocked on the door.

You sat up ramrod straight at the noise. There was someone outside the cabin, it wasn’t definitely an animal, the knock was too precise. And it couldn’t be the enemy, they would’ve broken in.

Grasping your gun, you walked out of the bedroom on your tiptoes. Holding the gun with one hand and the doorknob with the other, you hid behind the wall. You turned the knob and peaked through the slit, only to see the last person you ever expected.

Squeaking in surprise, you dropped your gun when you saw Steve, in a beard, stand in front of you. ��Steve?!” The cold air was freezing your face and yet your mouth hung open with shock. “Yes doll it’s me.” He said in a chirpy tone.

“What are you doing here? How did you even find me?” You were genuinely confused, who leaked him this information? “Doesn’t matter doll.” Was all you got as an answer.

“Well it does, this is jeopardising the Avengers.” This definitely soured his mood. Not only had you implied that he wasn’t an avengers anymore, you had made it clear that you prioritised your job over him.

You saw his crestfallen face and instantly knew where you’d gone wrong. “Come in Steve. I don’t want my face to freeze.” Though he chuckled, you knew you had killed the mood.

He walked in and closed the door with a silent thud. “So is this how it is now? Jeopardising the avengers and all. Not even how I’ve been doing? Am I okay?” Steve folded his arms and you didn’t like the gesture at all.

“Steve... it’s not like that. God, Steve! I’ve missed you so much. I just got surprised is all, I didn’t expect to see you here out of all places. So, how have you been Stevie?”

He just scoffed and continued, “You didn’t even think once before taking Tony’s side, did you?” You knew it would come to this. You still remembered the day you had discussed the accords.

The discussion surely hadn’t ended in the office as had dragged all the way to your and Steve’s bedroom. And after the airport fight, you hadn’t met him even once to talk any further. You had waited for Steve to at least contact you, but he never did.

“Neither did you Steve. With that perspective you chose Bucky. Do you have any idea how long I’ve waited for you. You could’ve contacted me, but did you? I tried finding you Steve, I really did, somehow I was always a little too late.”

“You chose Tony over me. I gave you an option to come with me and you denied it.” Steve had expected this to go better. He had used some cards under his sleeve to find your location and he wasn’t going to reveal them.

“Tony means to me what Bucky means to you. Tony was there for me when no one else was, I had to take his side. You both could’ve left your egos and has chosen a middle route yet you didn’t.”

You would always be mad at how neither Steve nor Tony were ready to compromise a little. “Oh really? Or is it convenient for you and Tony to have your fun now that I’m not around.”

Steve regretted his words the instant the left his mouth. He very well knew you and Tony were like siblings. “Steve, really? What the hell are you even thinking?” You shouted as you couldn’t believe your ears.

“I’m sorry. I just... I didn’t mean that. I’m really sorry. I’ve met you after so long and I didn’t like how we began.” You nodded in agreement. “Apology accepted. Why don’t we begin again?”

“Alright. It’s really good to meet you. I missed my best girl so much.” You lurched yourself forward and into his arms. And he held you as if you hadn’t spent all these days without meeting each other. “I’m sorry.” He once again apologised.

“It’s okay Steve.” He held you tighter, almost suffocating you. “I missed you too Stevie. I love you.” You said the last three words just above a whisper. You are afraid if he had stopped loving you.

“I love you too.” You looked up at him from your embrace with misty doe eyes, “You do?” He smiled and pressed a kiss to your forehead, “I’ll always love my doll.”

Without breaking your eye contact, you weaved your hand within his soft overgrown locks of hair. You were now finally able to take in his appearance. His auburn beard was something new and unexpected. While the previous Steve was the golden boy of America, this Steve looked more like the daddy of America.

You chuckled at your own thoughts and Steve gave you a confused look, “What happened?” He asked somewhat pointing. “You must be killing all the ladies with your look.”

“I don’t care about the other ladies, I just care about you.” His words erupted butterflies in your stomach. Though he had taken a courser look, he was still the same cheesy guy. You punched him playfully in his abs and got out of the embrace.

“Catch me Captain!” You said as you ran towards the bed. The cabin was tiny and you knew he would catch you within seconds, yet the chase was fun. Steve was fueled not only by you challenging him, but also by you calling him captain.

You squealed his name as he came up from behind and picked you up. Swiftly turning you around, he smashed your lips together. Locking your feet behind his waist, you pulled him closer. You were glad Steve was able to pick you up without much efforts.

He pushed you back into the bed and you bounced, not once but twice. As soon as you settled in, Steve covered your body with his own. “I missed you so much.” He groaned as he pressed kisses down your neck. His beard was tickling and rubbing you, and you wanted more. You wanted it to burn, you wanted it to hurt, as you wanted to remember.

You had been so touch starved all this time, just Steve’s kisses were enough to elicit moans out of you. You tugged on his now old, worn tactical suit as he slid his hands beneath your T-shirt. “Such a greedy girl I’ve got.”

He got off the bed and discarded his clothes as quickly as possible. You hadn’t thought it was possible for Steve to be anymore ripped than he already was, but you were clearly wrong. You had no clue how he had survived, but apparently he had more than enough time to take care of his body.

Your eyes trailed down his body and landed on his monster cock and you practically started salivating. You wanted nothing more than to suck on it like your favourite candy. Seeing you go dreamy eyed at his dick, Steve started pumping it with lazy strokes.

The bed wasn’t spacious, but it was big enough to fit two of you. He slid back on top of you like a predator catching his prey and his lips seemed to be in no mood of leaving your body; sucking your neck and marking up your collarbone. You knew it had been too long, and Steve was going to ravish you.

Steve’s body ran a little extra hot due to the serum and his heat engulfing your body made you feel hot despite the extreme snow outside. You ran your hands on his broad chest and relished in the warmth you once missed.

He peeled your shirt and shorts with haste, only to find you without any bra. His eyes zeroed in on your already pebbled nipples and he licked his lips. Seeing his veiny, big hands knead your breast sent your brain into an overdrive. “Oh Steve.” You moaned breathily. At your words, something in his eyes changed.

On second you were looking in his darkened eyes and the next you were flipped on your stomach. But the smack that hit your ass the next moment made you go cross eyed. Steve was absolutely mesmerised by the way your ass jiggled.

“Ow!” You pretended to be hurt despite being exponentially turned on. The way Steve was surprising you today, you sure were going to cum too soon. “What did you call me?” His voice was husky and deep. “Steve?” You weren’t sure what you said wrong.

“It’s Captain for you now.” Steve hadn’t stopped thinking about you calling him captain, he didn’t know why but it evoked something in him. “Yes captain!” You sighed breathlessly. Steve had always been a gentle lover before, but this was a whole another side of him.

Your back was bombarded with kisses as his hands rubbed your sides. He held you down by your shoulder while his other hand ventured right where you wanted him to. You liked being pinned down by Steve, the fact that he could use you however he wanted, only aroused you more.

His fingers rubbed your pussy, collecting the juices. “So filthy wet for me doll.” He groaned when you whimpered. Finally, he inserted two thick fingers into you, which slid in easily due to your juices, and started pumping lazily. “Ahh, yes Captain.” You moaned as he hit the spot that your fingers were never able to reach.

You were so wet that just his fingers were enough to make wet slapping sounds. His thumb started circling your clit, “That feel good, doll?” You nodded against the sheets and pressed back onto his fingers. “Yeah. Please Captain!”

Steve chuckled at your plea and pressed kisses to your ear. “What do you want doll?” He asked in a condescending tone. He knew you were too out of it to answer. “You get so dumb when I get just my fingers in you.”

He increased his speed and you knew you were too close to coming. His thumb, which was now slick enough from rubbing your folds, started circling the rim of your puckered hole. You screamed for the heavens when his thumb entered your ass.

Trembling hard, you collapsed into the bed as your tight walls clenched around Steve’s fingers. You were babbling incoherent mixture of his name and pleas as you rode out the high. His fingers being roughly shoved into you and at the same time his sweet kisses to your cheeks and neck made you dizzy with pleasure.

He cocooned your body as you twitched from the aftershocks. “Do you… do you have a condom?” You asked panting for air. He was a super soldier and getting pregnant in such crisis wasn’t a good idea. “Shit. No.”

If you had any energy left, you would’ve slow clapped at his foolishness. This man goes to the efforts of tracking you down to fuck you and forgets condoms. “That’s real smart of you Captain.” He playfully smacked your ass once again, “Hey, don’t talk to me like that.”

An idea lit up in your head, “Um, I… I have lube in my bag and… uh… youcouldfuckmyass.” You wanted Steve to fuck your ass since a long time, but you were too shy to ask. But now that the opportunity presented itself, you weren’t going to back down.

“Huh?” You said the last part so quickly Steve couldn’t comprehend it even with his super hearing. “I said, you could fuck my ass.” This time he did hear what you said, that too very clearly. “God, you are so dirty, I love you.” He said as he got up from the bed. You instantly missed his warmth and weight.

Reaching your bag, he searched for the contents until he found the bottle he was searching for. He shook it around left and right in his hand while giving you a smug look, “Come on! A girl has her needs.” Chuckling he jumped right back on the bed.

Even though he was now straddling your thighs, he hadn’t leaned down on you. You looked back to see he was thinking something and his eyes just had a thin line of blue left to them, it scared you just as much as it excited you.

“Well, you gotta earn it.” He said after much thinking. You pouted as you didn’t understand what he was saying. “Work yourself open for me, you know how big I am. Earn me fucking you.” That’s it, you were going to break your record and were going to cum tonight just from his words.

Steve bent down to give you a filthy unhurried kiss and slid a little back on the bed. You poured a liberal amount of lube into your hand and spread it down your cleft. You were gentle and slow, you barely had two fingers in your asshole before.

You knew if it became too much all you had to do was say it aloud and Steve would stop at that very instant. And that’s why you always felt safe with Steve. With somewhat shaky hands, you slid just one finger in.

“Fuck.” Seeing Steve curse, you turned around to see his eyes fixated on your fingers. His own fingers were curled around his length and pumping lazy strokes. It was utterly humiliating and you were getting off on it.

After you relaxed enough with one finger, you added another into your warm tight heat. You whimpered and moaned as you scissored yourself. The entire time, Steve was praising you as well as humiliating you. It was like a pouring ice and fire on your body at the same time.

You were too lost in the pleasure to notice Steve come right in front of your face. “Take me in your mouth. I know you wanna taste me.” You blinked up at him with glassy eyes. Your confused doe eyes, hardened him even more. “Suck me off doll.”

He could see your eyes go wide and blow up with excitement. You nodded and took him in your mouth. Starting with the head, you slowly took him deeper “You are doing so well doll.” Steve grunted as your spit slicked his cock and your soft tongue pressed against its underside.

Seeing your fingers disappear in your tight hole as you took his length in your mouth, made him want to shoot right off. This was definitely the craziest thing he had ever done, and boy, did he want more.

You were sloppy and without technique and yet Steve loved it. It was the desperation and the desire that got him off. The fingers and his cock filling your holes were a little less than too much for you. Tears were spilling out of eyes and your spit was coating your chin, and still you didn’t want to stop.

“Fuck! Stop.” Steve commanded. He knew he would come if he didn’t stop you. And after so many days, he wanted to come inside you. And just the aspect of shooting off in your ass made him twitch with excitement.

Unable to wait anymore, Steve quickly repositioned to place himself right behind you. Slowly, you removed your sloppy fingers and with a loud exhale dropped down into the bed.

Taking the bottle of lube, he made sure his dick was dripping with it. “Hhnng.” You moaned unintelligibly as he pressed against your hole with his blunt head.

Your moans turned into whine and whimpers as his head entered your tight hole. What little control you had over your body, you lost it too and slagged into the bed with just your ass held high by Steve.

You had expected it to hurt, but instead all you felt was full; completely and utterly filled by Steve. Once he was into you till his base, he again started pressing soothing kisses to your back and neck to calm you down.

As Steve still didn’t move, you finally gathered your brain enough to say, “Steve, move!” Steve was waiting exactly for that and slowly pulled out an inch only to thrust back in.

In the beginning he was giving short measured thrusts, enough to give you pleasure but not enough to make you go crazy. But with time, he started pumping into you with frenzy, his thrusts hard and making your eyes roll.

Your hands were clutching the pillows surrounding your face for dear life. You were close, but you knew this wasn’t enough, you needed something more. “Touch your pussy. Ah… Fuck!” Steve said gritting his teeth.

Instantly your hand dipped down and started furiously rubbing your clit in tight motions. Your pussy was dripping wet and your fingers were instantly drenched. Steve’s grunts were urging you even more.

Your pussy, just clenching on air, was in desperate need of attention. Both you and Steve cursed as you inserted your index and middle finger into your cunt and started fingering yourself. Your palm rubbed your swollen nub just right as your fingers pumped in tandem.

Your mouth was slack open with silent screams. Seeing your wet mouth open, Steve put two of his own fingers inside for you to suckle on. Your eyes blew wide open at the intrusion.

But soon you melted around the his fingers and sucked on them and laved them with your tongue. His thick fingers in your mouth made you see heaven on earth. “You like all your holes filled, don’t you dirty girl?” Steve himself was breathless and you just hummed around his fingers.

Steve knew you well enough to know you were close, “Come for me doll. Come now.” His words washed over you and you came harder than you ever had.

Eyes close, your legs trembled around Steve as your entire body twitched and your walls quivered around Steve. Grunting with pleasure, Steve erratically thrusted in you until he reached his own climax.

Steve came loud and hard. He’d almost forgotten how good it felt releasing in you. You could feel his warmth filling you and you didn’t know whether you came again or if you were still riding the previous orgasm.

Your bodies now slack, you both fell into the bed. In other circumstances if Steve’s body would’ve been on top of you, you might have suffocated due to his weight. But now his body was acting like a weighted blanket and was providing you familiarity and comfort.

Steve gently pulled himself out and cleaned you up, while you lay there like a boneless mess. He was finally satisfied as he made sure you drank water and ate an energy bar. You knew that no matter if Steve Rogers was captain America or not, he would always be a gentleman.

You let out a happy noise when he came back and spooned you from behind. Truth be told you had no idea if he would be there when you’d wake up or not. So you relished in the moment as much as you could. No matter what happened, there was one thing that wouldn’t change, and that was your love for each other.

“I love you Steve.” You mumbled before giving in to the tempting valley of sleep. And the last thing you heard before drifting off was, “I love you too, doll.”

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notchesandbullets · 4 years ago

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Life After Luck (Black Panther!Shinsou x Reader)

Art credit: Pixiv ID 123370838

Warnings: harassment, descriptions of injuries and blood, mention of a past character death (minor) and violence, angst, fluff, protective Shinsou and endearing dad!Shinsou.

A/N: second work for @ultimate-astridwriting hybrid collab!!

Words: 9.4k

You and Shinsou had been seeing each other secretly for years. And in the famed city of Musutafu where the existence of hybrids were extremely rare, that wasn’t exactly an easy feat.

The statistics varied around the globe but the general trend ended up to be less than 5% of the world’s population being born with some kind of animal trait.

Because they were so rare, most humans lived out their whole lives without encountering a hybrid in person once, but for the odd individual, sometimes they would catch a glimpse.

Ever since he was young, Shinsou had to fight every step of the way to get what he wanted. He had to work harder than most just for the mere scraps of attention from scouts that came to search for those with talent to become future heroes, but he never once complained. Until a fight broke out at school, the jocks beating him up in the cafeteria, calling his aspiration to be a hero stupid while everyone else just sat there and watched.

They called him all sorts of horrible names that made his skin crawl and at the end of it all, they didn’t even get punished for starting the fight. He did.

After that, he stomped away from the school grounds and never looked back.

Overcoming life’s great trials, he made a name for himself in his own community in Japan with the help of his mentor, Aizawa.

The scruffy man demanded that he at least get the bare minimum of an education with him if he really refused to go back to his original school, and that’s how the odd pair that resembled father and son more than anyone else ended up getting homeschooled by the veteran underground pro.

Eventually, the once scrawny black panther without a quirk transformed into a seasoned pro that Japan’s law enforcement called on whenever a case called for his skills.

Shinsou’s hybrid traits made it easy for him to sneak around despite his size, making him one of the idealistic hires when police needed someone for undercover work. Coupled with the prowess of his build body, he was more than capable to takedown whatever targets were given to him.

Once he reached adulthood, he left the police reserves and went out on his own, seeking a life that lacked the emergency sirens and ways of deceit that it had been filled with previously.

He bounced around from job to job, starting from the bottom up. He washed dishes in a kitchen for a restaurant then went on to be a cashier and then finally worked on the side of the road, cleaning up litter left behind by inconsiderate people.

Shinsou found that over time, he appreciated doing those jobs more and got fulfillment out of it that he didn’t find before.

Little things that happened daily put an extra spring in his step, like strolling down the street and seeing an elder needing help to get across. The simple actions of holding open the door or complimenting someone in hopes of making their day, it was so much clearer than it had been before.

That wasn’t to say that life was a walk in the park for the estranged panther. He still got comments about his appearance when his hood slipped off or from people who looked closely enough spotted his tail, but he no longer cared. His self-worth didn’t rely on pleasing them.

He was done with trying to blend in with the humans. He was different and he was proud of it.

Shinsou’s jaw clenched and his eyes hardened every time someone muttered something not-so-kind under their breath but he pushed on out of sheer determination, shoving it down until he could process it and release the feelings that came with it. He didn’t want to be the type of person who held a grudge.

Nothing good came out of that.

It was hard, but he had an example to set. He didn’t want his son to end up like the person he used to be.

A loner, an outcast, filled with so much anger aimed at the world that he lacked the ability to get along with anybody. And he didn’t want that for his son.

Naoki. His five-year-old kid with as much spunk as you had.

His wife of seven years.

Shinsou had met you on the eve of a grand ball being hosted in honor of Midoriya’s birthday, a party thrown for the Number One Hero by his large circle of friends. The black panther hybrid had been serving as protection for the night to Kaminari, an old human friend of his from high school who had hooked him up with a steady job within his own company.

Private security.

Since his panther genes gave him a much more built physique, Shinsou didn’t have any troubles convincing the big boss that he was the right fit for being a bodyguard. Coupled with his impressive background, that sealed the deal in one go.

Shinsou had been over at the bar getting a drink for the hyperactive blond conversing with his other guard, Jirou, when it happened.

The grand doors to the Victorian ballroom opened and in you entered, causing everyone’s jaws to drop to the floor.

Your floor-length gown was breathtaking. Diamonds glittered on soft skin from where the expensive necklace sat just above your collarbone. Ruby heels peeked out from under your dress as you floated through the entryway, coming to a stop at the balcony high above all the guests’ heads.

White chiffon skirts sweeping the marble tile, your satin heels clicked against the floor as you strode in, your chin turned delicately at the audible gasp that left the doorman.

An easy smile popped up on your features as he hastily apologized for staring and you brushed it off with an airy wave of your hand.

Shinsou didn’t even know if you were aware of all the eyes on you as you glided down the steps and warmly greeted Todoroki, the one who actually reserved the ballroom for the night, and Bakugou, one of your oldest friends.

Thank Eraserhead for his enhanced hearing.

However, Shinsou practically fainted when you walked over to him, commenting that he looked nice right before introducing yourself. The dress code that he had previously complained about to Kaminari earlier went out the window as soon as his eyes settled on you, drinking in your figure.

You were the embodiment of a goddess.

At that point, he wasn’t sure if he died and went to heaven or what, but he knew one thing. You were absolutely breathtaking.

Your elegance, your ease and instant kindness whenever you interacted with someone had him weak in the knees.

You were a vision.

Radiating pure light and beauty.

Sliding over to him, Kaminari had flashed him a cocky grin and reassured him that Jirou could handle his responsibilities if he, oh, wanted to pay a visit to a particularly stunning girl.

Jirou, his right-hand woman, swatted the electric blond’s shoulder as he doubled over with laughter but calmly told Shinsou that if he wanted to stroll around for a little while before coming back, then well, there certainly was nothing wrong with having a little bit of fun.

Blushing, he refused, claiming he couldn’t possibly leave Kaminari alone that long. He would find a way to set something on fire somehow.

The man had a weird affinity with fire.

Shinsou busied himself with the glasses, pouring the drinks that he had originally came over to get and he was about to get back to Jirou and Kaminari, both who suspiciously disappeared from sight, when he glanced up and saw you in all your splendor.

Right in front of him.

The crystal flutes he had been holding smashed onto the floor, clear shards flying everywhere. All heads turned to him but this time, the attention was unwanted.

Shinsou was frantic, trying to amend his mistake before you saw, even though that was literally impossible at this point, and Kaminari popped up out of nowhere, intervening before the enraged caterer could say some not-so-kind words to him.

That was fortunate for him.

What wasn’t as fortunate was you crouching down the second you heard the crash, disregarding everyone else’s shouts for you to be careful as you raced to his side, bending down to help.

“Are you alright?!” You asked, eyes wide with panic when your gaze landed on his palms and you froze. “Oh no, you’re bleeding!!”

The next ten minutes consisted of him adamantly refusing to let you help him clean up the shattered crystal and you arguing against him. Shinsou was forced to cave into you as you insisted on helping, threatening to haul him into your car to take him to the hospital yourself if he didn’t at least let you look at it, so he wasn’t left with much of a choice.

It wasn’t long before all the dangerous fragments were swept up and once the situation was handled, you led him out of the way to tend to his injuries.

Shinsou was quiet the entire way out, only protesting when you finally reached your destination of the nearest single stall bathroom. Here, at least it was quieter than the party that had resumed out there. Definitely wasn’t his crowd, but he wasn’t about to stomp all over the opportunity that Kaminari gave him just because he was a bit uncomfortable.

He could handle it. He was a panther, for crying out loud.

His frame was broad, his sharp indigo eyes terrifying and he was tougher than anyone else out there.

And yet, you didn’t flinch away from his wary gaze, going so far as to tend to the cuts and scraps on his bare hands, disinfecting them gently before bandaging them up in soft gauze you found in the cabinet.

It wasn’t odd to have amenities at an event like this where some kind of physical discourse was bound to happen. You knew it well.

Shinsou eyed you while you worked. “... I didn’t catch your name.”

If you were put off by the low drawl edged with a slight growl clearly meant to intimidate you, you didn’t show it at all.

Shrugging nonchalantly, you ducked your head somewhat shyly as you tied off the cotton. “L/N. L/N, Y/N.”

Shinsou smirked. “Nice to meet you.”

You flashed him a grin. “Likewise.”

This time, he was the one to look down shyly as his heart skipped a beat, awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck with his newly banadaged palm as you wrapped the other one. “... Thanks for doing that.”

The snort that left you had him doing a double take.

“Thanks for letting me.” You retorted, tugging a bit harder on the end of the gauze to emphasize your exasperation with his earlier stubbornness and Shinsou winced, already regretting it.

“Sorry about that.” He murmured. He didn’t want to be on your bad side already. He had just met you.

Your gaze softened a tad as you picked up on the genuine strain in his voice. “It’s okay.”

After you finished tending to his injury, giving him a lame excuse why you knew first-aid so well, the two of you returned to the ball.

He let it go. For some reason, he had a feeling he shouldn’t pry.

Shinsou readjusted his tie, knowing that if he didn’t, Kaminari would do it for him. That’s just the type of person the electric blond was. It was hella annoying.

But his indigo gaze kept on you the entire time as your skirts swept across the floor, capturing all the attention of the guests once again.

Shinsou tapped the rim of the champagne glass to his lips contemplatively, mulling something over in his mind.

He saw through your weak excuse that you just knew how to do first-aid. He spotted the way your hands shook when you saw the blood, no matter how shallow the laceration was, and he couldn’t help but do a little bit of digging.

Jirou helped him find out that you weren’t a doctor or a nurse. In fact, you weren’t in any kind of profession in the medical field.

While Shinsou was slightly glad you weren’t so that he wouldn’t run into you when missions went sideways, he was more disappointed than anything else.

What if he never saw you again after tonight?

The thought of today being the last time he laid eyes on you was too much for him to bear and even though he tried to keep his distance, tried to stomp out the blossoming warmth in his chest for you when you giggled and threw him a smile through the crowd with logic, nothing worked.

Shinsou gathered his courage and with a push from Kaminari, literally, he had a date with the bashful bartender by the end of the night.

Waving goodbye to you after he walked you to his car, his arm dropped back down to his side as you drove off into the night. This is going to be fun...

Two weeks passed by and he still had yet to see you.

At first, he was the one to get called away. Kaminari needed him for a gig while he closed a deal on the nightclub that he owned that he was looking to expand. Apparently, Jirou and Sero were unavailable. He apologized profusely, promising to make it up to you, but you didn’t even mind.

You understood that sometimes life just happened and things got in the way. He had nothing to be sorry for. You rescheduled for the following week.

That was when you got called away. Family emergency.

Shinsou spent twenty minutes on the phone with you, promising that he wasn’t holding it against you for needing to push back the date again. His eyes softened when he clearly heard how distressed you were through his cell and he sighed, murmuring into the receiver that it didn’t matter how long it took or how many obstacles the two of you would have to get through.

His heart still longed for you just as strongly as the first day he saw you.

With his quiet yet passionate reassurance, you were able to attend to all that you needed to, keeping in contact with him throughout the week. You were ashamed to admit it, but with how easy he was to talk to, you found yourself falling hard.

Then, the day finally came where life allowed you this one happiness.

According to you, the first date went well. Sure, Shinsou was a bit shy and awkward, fumbling over his words but you found it extremely cute.

He wasn’t nearly as intimidating as his figure portrayed. Underneath all that brawn, the black panther was sweet and he was kind.

It took some time for him to actually warm up to you, but you were there waiting for him patiently. You never pushed him, never asked him to reveal secrets he didn’t want to talk about or divulge information about his personal life unless he himself wished to talk about it.

But when he finally did open up, close to a year later after that initial meeting at Midoriya’s birthday party, he found that he couldn’t stop running his mouth when you trained your keen gaze on him so intently, hanging onto his every word.

Shinsou told you everything.

He told you about his lonely past, about the man called Eraserhead but how he knew him as Aizawa, how he preferred coffee over tea because while neither of them actually had any taste, one of them did a much better job of keeping him awake at night when he had to work.

You giggled and told him you took note of that, leaning forward to plop your chin in the palm of your hand as you regarded him mischievously.

“Does that mean the great and famous Toshi doesn’t like water?” You teased lightly, stirring your hot chocolate while the snowflakes fell outside, melting the instant they hit the window.

The pillowy softness looked deceptively soft and cozy but you knew after many experiences of jumping into piles of snow that that was definitely not the case.

Shinsou scowled at the lilt in your voice but the edges of his mouth twitched, desperately trying to hold back a fond smile at the sound of your nickname for him.

You gave him that nickname after you learned his given name. He had shared it with you months after you two started dating regularly. You had pestered him for it for a while after the first coffee date but after he asked you to stop, that he would tell you when he was ready, you stopped immediately.

Boundaries had to be respected.

One of your old girlfriends made fun of you for it, claiming that it didn’t make sense so you shouldn’t feel the need to respect it.

You dropped her right after.

Understanding didn’t matter. If it was close to him, then it mattered to you. And that went for everyone.

Shinsou tucked his hands into the pockets of his pants and leaned back in the booth, a low chuckle rumbling from his chest. The only other person he let call him Toshi was Aizawa and that was on the rare occasion that his mentor praised him for a job well done.

“You have some nerve, doll.” Shinsou teased right back, the barest amount of amusement twinkling in his eyes and he cleared his throat. “But no, I actually do like water.”

In spite of the common misconception that all cats hated water, he got that a lot once people saw his ears and tail, fangs poking out between his lips. But if anything, he had no issues with it. Let them say and think whatever they wanted, it didn’t matter to him.

You however… he couldn’t have you thinking things that weren’t true.

Shinsou made a face. “I just am not fond of baths.”

You slapped your knee and cackled at that, laughing so loud that you drew the attention of some of the other patrons in the vicinity but you couldn’t even catch your breath long enough to apologize for ruining their calm coffee cafe experience.

The two of you dated for quite a long time before Shinsou popped the question.

For you, it had taken you by a complete and utter surprise. You had expected him to ask you to move in with him first or something since his place was big enough, not this. No one had ever committed to a relationship with you long enough and serious enough to make you think that marriage was part of the equation.

But while you were startled, you still agreed, tears caught in your lashes. You may have been shocked but you were so elated.

Shinsou, keen as ever, wiped away your tears and coaxed your face up, finger hooked underneath your chin as he examined you closely.

Indigo hues softened in concern. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, nothing,” You reassured him with a sniffle and bright smile. “I just— Sometimes I forget how good of a person you really are, Toshi.”

He was taken aback at that. His whole life he had been told the opposite. And yet here he was, with the love of his life telling him otherwise.

His heart was going to explode.

It hadn’t been the first time you said it but he hoped that it wouldn’t be the last.

And when the news that you two were now engaged finally hit you, you took some time to soak in the scenery.

The place he picked was absolutely perfect.

An alcove secluded and filled with fragrant flowers, vines trailing up the expanse of the old stone ruins. Soothing streams cut paths through the quiet garden, a serene and tranquil place hidden amongst the bustling town of Musutafu. There was no one else around. Just you two.

It was perfect. It was perfectly Toshi.

“Thank you.” You whispered, leaning your head and resting it on his shoulder.

He booped your nose softly, smiling slightly when you scrunched it up cutely and his tail curled around your waist protectively, holding you close.

“I love you.” Shinsou murmured, closing his eyes as he breathed you in.

There was no hesitation in your soft reply. “I love you too.”

But your relationship with Shinsou wasn’t all sunshine and roses. There was a time where you thought you might lose him.

That he might die.

It was bad. Kaminari had called you right after it happened but because you had been working at the time and your dick of a boss didn’t let you have your phone, you didn’t see any of those messages until after you got off your shift.

But when you finally did look at it, your heart stopped.

What happened next was a blur. Your phone slipped through your fingers, uncaring how the screen cracked and went black the instant it hit the pavement and you tore off in the address now ingrained in your memory despite only looking at it once.

Please be okay, please be okay, please be okay, You chanted in your head, tears streaming down your face and the city lights faded into the background as you zipped down the familiar path to the hospital you swore you would never step foot in again. Toshi, I can’t lose you too.

The front desk receptionist didn’t even stop you as you barreled through the front doors with panicked eyes, chest heaving. She simply waved you on. You knew where to go.

When you finally got to his room, your heart stopped.

Kaminari wasn’t kidding. It was bad.

No one else was in the white room with white walls that contained your beloved lying deathly still on the single cot in the center of the room.

The hospital room was vacant. Empty. No color.

You hated it.

But you suppressed those feelings of unease that made you sick to your stomach and stepped a foot inside, racing to Shinsou before you could talk yourself out of it.

“I’m here.” You cried out, reaching for his hand. A choked sob left you when his fingers weakly curled around yours. “I’m here, Hitoshi.”

The doctors came and went but you stayed by his side, not even batting an eye when Kaminari, Jirou and Sero came to visit.

There were heavy bags under your eyes from lack of sleep due to the past few days. “When will he wake up?”

Kaminari hesitated, glancing at Jirou, hoping to find her usual reassurance but a foreign worry wrought her features.

“I… don’t know.” He said finally, placing a hand on your shoulder, sighing when you didn’t even look up at him and smiled like you normally did. “He’s under a pretty heavy anesthesia—”

“He’s going to wake up.” You stated firmly, brow kitting stubbornly and you squeezed his hand tighter.

But when it was clear he wasn’t going to squeeze back, your grip loosened and your hands fell back in your lap.

“He’s going to wake up.” You repeated, voice shaking this time around with insecurity as you faced the possible reality that he might not.

That you had just grown close to someone else who was going to leave you.

According to the report that Jirou had tried to tell you about, Shinsou had gotten attacked by someone he had helped the police put away a long time ago.

A retaliation hit.

Stabbed in the shoulder with a gunshot wound through his femoral artery, there wasn’t a lot of hope for him. He lost a lot of blood.

But you were certain he would fight. He could make it through this. He promised you that he would never leave you.

Resolve strengthening, you wiped away your tears harshly with the back of your hand before covering his motionless hand with yours once more. As long as you were here, you would provide him all the support he needed to get through this.

“Toshi…” You sobbed as the other three took their leave after failing to convince you to go home and get some rest. They would get some food and bring it up to you, sure you hadn’t eaten in days. You didn’t want to be the one to tell them that they were right.

Shinsou never liked it when you skipped meals. What would he say if he saw you now?

You pressed a wet kiss to the back of his hand, tears blurring your vision.

“I’ll be right here when you wake up.” You promised, eyelashes fluttering close as you failed against the anguish.

“Please, don’t leave me alone.”

Days turned into weeks and your hope was dwindling with each passing hour.

You had lost your job at the diner that you worked at because you refused to leave his side. You were lucky to have Kaminari reassure you that money wouldn’t be a problem and you were eternally grateful that he knew just how important it was that you didn’t leave Shinsou’s bedside.

Jirou and Sero rotated shifts to keep watch over their friend, coordinating with Tsukauchi, All Might and Eraserhead to provide top security but you couldn’t be bothered to pay attention to their activities.

All you did, from sunrise to midnight was stare at Shinsou’s peacefully sleeping face in hopes that he would blink open those tired eyes and gaze at you once more.

Please, You begged for what seemed like the millionth time to someone, anyone who was listening. Please help him.

Let him be okay.

When a month and a half had passed, you were at your wit’s end. There had been no change since day one. The doctors said that all his injuries had healed, thanks to Recovery Girl, but that it was likely he would never come out of the coma.

You had no more tears to cry. Your figure was gaunt, facial features sunken in like you had seen a ghost and lost your mind. No one could convince you to eat or sleep.

If Shinsou died, there was a good chance you would too.

Life was empty without him in it.

You couldn’t take this anymore. The waiting, the not knowing. You hated it.

You begged him even though you knew he couldn’t hear you, angry at him, angry at the guy who put him here, angry at the world for being so unfair that you lost it. Yelling at him, you fought back frustrated tears as you poured your heart out to him.

But then you stopped. He didn’t know.

Sinking back into the uncomfortable plastic chair that your body had molded to, you closed your eyes in defeat.

That’s right. You never told him.

Eyes growing sad and regretful, you debated for a second before you decided that if you were feeling this way, you might as well tell him why.

Holding his hand that teetered on the edge of chilly due to the slowed down circulation, you took a deep breath.

“You always wanted to know, ever since we first met.” You started softly, playing idly with his fingers to distract yourself from the horror of this story. “I knew you saw right through me then, should’ve taken the warning and run.”

You smiled faintly. He never would’ve let you.

“I…” You trailed off, losing your courage. Breathing shakily, you tried to gather yourself. You knew this wasn’t going to be an easy feat but somehow, this was the hardest part of it all.

Where you had to admit what you felt with no hidden truths.

Clearing your throat, you started over.

“I never told you about Ryuu.” You confessed, blinking up at the stained tiles of the ceiling in an attempt to hold back the tears that welled up in your eyes. “He was my little brother, passed away when I was 15.”

You exhaled shakily. “He was only six.”

Your dad had gotten mugged and was beaten to death on the outskirts of the city before you were born. Your mom raised you as best as a single mother her age could but it was hard.

She had no job, no family, no one to help her. Your childhood consisted of you bouncing around the streets to make a penny, then crashing in whatever crumbling, rundown building you could find for the night.

Any run-ins with the law weren’t good.

You knew that they would take you away from your mom if they knew, put you in the foster care system. You couldn’t let them do that, who would take care of her?

She didn’t tell you that she was pregnant. You found out when she started showing.

You didn’t say anything about it for the nine months she carried that baby, supporting her with all you could. Life was okay. You got a job running errands for the kind man who owned a grocery store at the corner of the street.

You had enough money to put some food on the table.

When she birthed the baby, you were there the entire time. You were there when he had his first cry, when the nurse cut the umbilical cord, and when your mother passed away on the hospital bed, too weak from labor to carry on.

You didn’t mourn. No matter how hard you tried or how much you wanted to, no tears came out.

Instead, you held Ryuu in your arms, kissing him on his little forehead as you vowed to protect him.

He was life. He was precious.

But you couldn’t protect him from himself.

Ryuu was born with a flawed heart. The doctors predicted that he wouldn’t live more than a year.

But your little brother pushed through. By the time he turned four, he was already showing signs of great progress and healing. You were hopeful that he could grow up like a normal kid and experience life to the fullest.

You hoped for too much.

Visits to the hospital became more frequent when he started coughing up blood. Violent seizures overtook him and one day, it claimed his life.

And you didn’t cry.

Onlookers speculated that you had no heart if you couldn’t even grieve for this poor boy, but no, that wasn’t it. That wasn’t it at all.

You thought you were over this already, that you had gotten over your fear of hospitals and all the despair that came with it, but no.

Seeing Shinsou laying there, deathly pale, had your heart beating right out of your chest, and not in a good way.

“When you wake up, I’m going to kill you.” You swore through the hot tears stinging your eyes and rolling down your cheeks.

Slouching heavily back down in that same uncomfortable plastic chair that dug into your back and made your butt incredibly sore, you clasped Shinsou’s hand tightly.

“You’re such an idiot.” You sobbed, fingers shaking as you let up the pressure, grazing over the back of his hand as though you were afraid he might disappear on you if you pressed too hard.

Vision blurry, a sob welled up in your chest and your body trembled uncontrollably as you let it all out. The build up of all the emotions you had been suppressing since you were younger released onto him and you cried and cried until you couldn’t anymore.

But your eyes flew open as something soft and fuzzy ruffled your hair.

Shooting upright, fresh tears gathered at the corners of your eyes and your hands clapped over your mouth in shock.

A broken cry escaped you. “Toshi…”

Shinsou’s indigo eyes opened just a crack but they were trained on you and the faintest of smiles graced his lips.

“Hey, doll.” He breathed tiredly.

His mouth barely moved but you heard him.

With an astonished and disbelieving cry of relief, you flung your arms around his neck.

Despite his body just waking up and getting accustomed to its surroundings, he didn’t hesitate to catch you, tucking your head under his chin and he buried his nose into your hair and inhaled deeply. Damn, he missed you.

“Fuck, I’m so sorry.” Shinsou apologized, wincing a bit as he tried to prop himself up. You were quick to realize what he wanted and helped him, fluffing the pillows behind him as best as you could even though it was hard to reach around his much bigger frame. “How long—”

“Too long.”

Shinsou’s eyes softened and he gently brushed away the teardrops escaping with the pad of his thumb as he cupped your face tenderly.

“I’m sorry, Y/N.” He whispered, eyes closing briefly as he rested his forehead against yours.

You glowered at him even though your heart was already surging towards him with open arms. “You better be.”

The sound of his throaty chuckle was a welcome one and you melted into his embrace, sighing at the deep purr that rumbled from his chest.

“Princess…” Shinsou murmured, Kaminari’s outburst and Jirou’s relieved expression as they burst into the room going unnoticed as he focused only on you. “Forgive me?”

Vaguely, you registered Sero bolting out the door to fetch the doctor but you blinked up at him and pouted, playing with the collar of his hospital robe.

“It wasn’t your fault.” You mumbled under your breath.

Shinsou’s eyebrows drew together. “I heard about your brother, I think. I’m sorry I didn’t—”

“You don’t need to ask for forgiveness.” You whispered, grip tightening on him when the doctor entered the room and asked you to leave so he could examine him. “There’s nothing to forgive.”

Shinsou begged for just one more minute with you, one more minute to hold you in his arms but the doctor was insistent. Reluctantly, with great difficulty, he let you go, the man taking your place in a second.

You swallowed harshly as you stepped away from him, Jirou patting your shoulder comfortingly and you turned to her as Kaminari peppered the exhausted panther with endless questions.

“Toshi?”

Shinsou turned his head at your soft voice and motioned for you to complete your thought. He knew that look on your face.

You broke away from Jirou, leaving her with Sero as you approached him once more. Slowly, with intent, you strode towards him, watery eyes diminishing as your resolve strengthened.

Taking his hand in yours, something flashed through your eyes. “I’m gonna make them pay.”

In spite of his vision growing foggy as the anesthetic kicked in, a small smirk played upon the edge of his mouth and his gaze flickered over your shoulder to lock purposefully with Kaminari’s. A silent request to keep you safe while he was out.

Shinsou sighed, settling into the thin mattress as comfortably as he could when you pressed a loving kiss to his forehead.

He smiled, eyes fluttering shut as the last thing he heard was your hushed declaration of how much you loved him.

“Go get ‘em, doll.”

Seven quirk-cancelling handcuffs, demolished turkey stuffing and a plate of thrown pudding later, you left the individuals responsible for attacking your Toshi in the police’s capable hands.

It had taken you forever to heal from the trauma of that day that landed your life partner in the hospital in such a dangerous predicament, but taking one slow step at a time, you managed to get back up on your feet and move forward.

Now, years later, the shining daylight turned into the ambiance of night, and that was when the real party started.

Purple lowlights glowed softly in contrast against the glittery sparkles of the disco ball hanging above the dancefloor.

Jirou spun tunes at the DJ booth, Sero jamming with Kirishima unabashedly to the loud EDM in the crowd, Bakugou violently fighting against his best friend when Kirishima begged for him to come join.

You poured drinks from behind the counter with an impassive Todoroki, bopping to the music that pumped through the air and reverberated through your bones. Your coworker continued to serve customers, strolling out into the dining area as someone waved him over. Uraraka and Aoyama, you think.

Kaminari had given you a position at his nightclub, asking if you wanted to put your bartending skills to good use since his last guy quit once he got a better gig. You accepted immediately.

You bustled around the back of the counter of the bar, glass shelves stocked with liquor high behind you. Polishing glasses, you handled several things at once as customers put in orders and talked to you all at once.

Tonight was a celebration and a bunch of your friends were here.

Bakugou was now begrudgingly dancing with Kirishima on the dancefloor, the permanent scowl on his face growing once Todoroki leaned over and casually noted how much he resembled a put off skunk in that moment. Midoriya had to intervene and drag away a clueless Todoroki while Kirishima wrangled back a furious pomeranian.

Kaminari hung out with Yaoyorozu by Jirou, Shoji and Ojiro drifting over to them as soon as they stepped in through the front door.

Excitement thrummed through your veins at all the familiar faces. With all your friends in one place, you were eager to see the one person you had been looking forward to catching up with all week.

He should be getting off of work soon…

A ring from the doorbell as it opened caught your attention.

“I’ll be right with you!!” You called as the figure who had just shuffled through the door of the bar sat down at the counter.

“No worries.” The man responded smoothly despite his tired tone. “Take your time.”

At the sound of the familiar voice, you casted a glimpse at him, spotting ruffled purple hair and indigo hues brimming with love fixated on you.

He waved you off with a lazy grin and you fought back a smile as you continued to make the requested cocktail for the customer you were currently serving.

You had both agreed to not act with familiarity at your workplace but that didn’t stop you from putting an extra bounce in your step as you flitted around from behind the counter with grace and practiced ease to help ease Todoroki’s workload.

Shinsou’s gaze followed you as you swapped places with the dual-haired man.

He had just got off of patrol with his old mentor, Eraserhead. Kaminari had given him the day off and let him spend time with the scruffy man. And of course Aizawa wanted to spend it doing work.

Taking off his signature mask to let it hang around his neck, Shinsou set down his keys on the polished obsidian tabletop, tapping his fingers idly while he waited for you to come back, his eyes flickering to the employees’ door that led to the back.

But he had no complaints while waiting.

One of his favorite pastimes was watching you work. The grace while you floated around the crowd of people coupled with the delicate precision you used to handle each glass while you poured liquor in different combinations, he could watch you for hours on end and never be bored.

Wiping your hands on your white apron dirtied with stains from this shift, you dashed back behind the counter to send out a few plates full of food that a table had ordered.

Shinsou rested his chin in the palm of his hand nonchalantly, his tail swishing lazily from side to side as you took care of things seamlessly, picking up the influx of business that came with the busy hour.

He briefly wondered why there were only you and Todoroki waiting on tables, scowling slightly when he thought that you had to deal with waitressing on top of bartending but you didn’t seem to mind.

With an easy smile and light shining in your eyes, you dealt with all of it with grace.

“Hello!!”

Shinsou glanced up, one of his rare smiles threatening to break out across his face at the sight that greeted him. You were leaning over the counter towards him, spinning a pen between your fingers smoothly as you whipped out a notepad.

“What can I get for you?” You asked politely but the mischievous glint in your eye gave it away.

Shinsou had been so lost in his thoughts that he didn’t hear you come over. Easily enough, a smug smirk curved at the edge of his mouth and he recovered rather quickly as he chuckled.

“Just water is fine, thanks.” He said and you nodded, flashing him a quirky smile.

You got him his water within seconds and in the blink of an eye, you were back to serving others. Caught up in the craziness of the rush hour, you barely noticed a little someone toddling up to stand up behind you as the door burst open.

“Mama?”

The babysitter you hired for the night came rushing in behind him, hauling your son back frantically, wrought with worry from when he sped ahead of her. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry, L/N-san, I just—”

You held up a hand to stop her, calming her down. “It’s okay, Gen. Take a deep breath and tell me what’s wrong.”

In a single hurried breath, she relayed in a panicked manner that she had a family emergency to take care of. You reassured her that it was okay to go, ushering her out the door when she continued to spew out apologies for bailing like this.

This wasn’t the first time something like this had happened and you were quite sure it wouldn’t be the last. The girl was nice and she got along great with your son but her parents struggled with their health and usually one of them or both of them landed in the hospital every week.

The stress.

You shook your head. It was unfair to put such a young girl through something so strenuous but you didn’t have any say in it and you inserting yourself into their lives would be intrusive so you settled for supporting her whenever the opportunity presented itself.

“Need a ride?” You asked, eyes sympathetic as you headed over to her, snatching your coat from the hook, already ready to help in any way that you could.

Gen waved her hands quickly, the smile that appeared gone as fast as it came. “That’s okay, but thank you, L/N-san!! Monoma is taking me to the hospital.”

Her knuckles turned white at how tightly she gripped the strap of her bag and your eyes softened understandingly as her boyfriend’s sports car pulled up just outside.

“Go on.” You urged softly. “And be careful.”

“I will.”

And with that, she turned around, leaving behind a fidgeting little boy tugging on the bottom of your apron.

“Mama? Where’s she going?” Naoki pouted, cheeks puffing out. “I thought we were gonna play…”

You hid a smile, reaching behind you to pat him on the head as you expertly handled a tray of empty beers and put the glasses in the sink. As Todoroki took over for you, you bent down to ruffle his hair.

“What is it, little one?” You questioned softly and somehow your son managed to hear you above the noise and clamor of the partying going on.

Normally, you would’ve done everything you could to keep him away from your workplace. Having your husband watch him in the back room was preferable until your shift was over. Naoki particularly enjoyed coloring.

The last babysitter you hired before Gen ended up being careless and lost track of him, letting the small boy wander out of the house. He found you at your workplace easily enough since it was a few blocks away but you were in hysterics when he trotted in through the door with his favorite Eraserhead plushie as one of your regulars held open the door for him.

Grandpa Shouta would never admit how much he loved the little guy but it didn’t matter. He and Hizashi constantly showered Naoki with gifts every weekend when they came over to take your family out on a shopping spree and obligatory trip to the cat café.

You didn’t have any relatives that lived close by or else you would’ve asked if they could babysit Naoki and Aizawa was out of the question since his job was just as dangerous and demanding as Shinsou’s.

Your workplace wasn’t exactly the traditional nightclub, it was actually a very sophisticated bar with tight security and respectful customers. Rarely you got anyone new but the steady stream of regulars was more than enough to keep the place up and running.

Nobody usually got violent when they had too much to drink but if they did, the bouncers Kendo and Tetsutetsu were both quick to throw them out of the establishment until they sobered up.

Naoki liked to cling to your legs when you were at home and since all your regulars knew of him from that little incident before, no one was surprised when the small boy tucked himself behind you shyly.

The disco music’s volume lowered a tad as Jirou realized that Naoki was with you, reducing it to a much more acceptable level for conversations to flow easier.

Shinsou sipped his water. Gen was in and out as quickly as she came, and there was no need for him to do anything when you took care of it so fast. Besides, his son hadn’t even noticed him yet.

Until now.

Beaming widely, Naoki faced his dad and hugged your leg.

Shinsou fought back a fond smile, waving at him discreetly to avoid catching the attention of the others. He rolled his eyes though when his silent and goofy conversation was interrupted by a Kaminari and Sero obnoxiously hooting from the side.

You remained oblivious, cleaning up a pile of dishes to clear your workspace as Todoroki disappeared into the kitchen where Sato and Tokoyami were continuing to crank out plates of food for the night.

Tugging on your apron, Naoki’s wide eyes met yours as you knelt down to his level. He pointed to someone sitting on the opposite side as his dad.

“Mama, that man looks mean…” He whispered fearfully, cowering behind your legs as you straightened up to your full height.

“Can I help you?” You asked with a pointed glance, tone hard as you addressed the one intimidating your son.

While any other person would’ve bristled at your icy tone, this burly man just snickered and leaned closer, making his intent clear.

Arching an eyebrow, you crossed your arms over your chest and pulled out your notepad. You hadn’t seen him around before, he must be a newcomer.

You sighed after a beat of him just ogling you, tapping your pen to the edge of the mini spiral impatiently as you suppressed the urge to vomit at his behavior. “If you’re not going to order anything, please sit at one of the tables instead so that another customer can take your place at the bar.”

Naoki whimpered and scuttled to hide more as the man stood up. He towered over you and the little boy’s heart started to beat faster with fear.

“Oh, is that right, princess?”

You bristled at the nickname and bit the inside of your cheek to stop some very colorful words from escaping, throwing a hard side glance at your husband when he abruptly stood up with a snarl painted on his face.

Moving to stand in front of him, blocking the man’s view from Shinsou and also stopping your husband at the same time should he do anything reckless, you plastered your best customer service smile on your face.

“Please do not call me that.” You stated, making it clear that you weren’t actually asking. “If you cannot treat me with respect then you should leave.”

“Oh?” The man chuckled, the sound grating against your ears unpleasantly. “And what are you gonna do about it, sweet thing?”

Oh, that was it.

“I’m taken.” You responded dryly, crossing your arms over your chest. “I really don’t appreciate how you’re talking to me, and my husband wouldn’t either.”

He smiled a sinister smile, causing your skin to crawl. “I don’t see him.”

And Shinsou was done letting you take this disrespect.

“Hey.” He barked, standing up to take his place next to you. “If a lady tells you to back off, you listen.”

A snort came from the other and then condescending laughter followed. “Yeah right. All girls are ever good for is being a pretty little thing to show off on your arm, am I right?”

“You’re dead wrong, prick.” Shinsou hissed, indigo alight with unparalleled fury as he came up behind you, wrapping beefy arms around your waist and glaring at the guy who had the audacity to harass you like that. “You don’t talk to anybody like this, especially not my wife.”

The man should’ve taken the obvious warning and backed down but he didn’t. Instead, his interest transformed into judgement and you could visibly see the walls coming down and locking as his hatred overtook his entire being.

“Hybrid, huh?” He sneered in disgust at you. “No wonder you went after someone like her.”

Shinsou’s arms curled around you tighter protectively and he stiffened behind you, coiled like a cobra and ready to strike but you held him back again.

But before you could throw him out of Kaminari’s establishment yourself, someone beat you to it.

In two seconds flat, the man who had been snickering at you and high-fiving his buddies folded over, clutching his stomach as his expression contorted in pain.

Naoki planted his hands on his hips and nodded his head proudly as he kicked the man where it hurt. “No one talks to my Mama like that!!”

“Naoki!!” You cried out.

He had slipped away so quietly and so fast that you didn’t notice in time to stop it.

Leaning over the counter, you spotted him blinking back at you innocently as Yaoyorozu hustled him away from the troublesome men he had just put in his place.

Bakugou appeared, a menacing aura surrounding his broad frame as he loomed over the sniveling man now cowering beneath him.

“You’re fuckin’ lucky she asked you nicely, cause the rest of us ain’t gonna, bastard.” He snapped, explosions popping from his palms.

Twisting his arm behind his back, the fuming man marched out the front door with the captured one in his iron grip squealing like a pig, followed by Kaminari and Sero taking the others with Kirishima cracking his knuckles while flashing a smile over his shoulder, shutting the door behind him. They were going to teach him a little lesson.

Naoki raised his hands high above his head joyfully, a wide smile spread across his face. “Mama, Mama, did you see?! Did I do good?!”

Immediately, you and Shinsou rushed over to Naoki, pulling him in for a hug.

“Are you okay?!” You exclaimed, scanning over him for any injuries, making sure he isn’t hurt. “Naoki, you can’t just run off like that!! Or kick people!!”

He pouted, lowering his hands slightly. “But Papa taught me how!!”

Shinsou collapsed into a fit of laughter when he heard that and your head snapped towards him.

Your eyes glittered with a hint of amusement, wry tone rolling off your tongue. “Did he now?”

Naoki nodded vigorously, his mop of purple hair flopping around on his head. “Yup!! He said that if someone’s mean, then they’re a bully and I can fight back!!”

At this point, you didn’t know whether you should applaud your son or scold your husband for teaching him such things.

Yaoyorozu shook her head as you deftly tickled Naoki’s sides, making him laugh loudly. He looked so very proud of himself, rambling on and on about how he protected you against the big bad scary man, just like his daddy showed him.

Shinsou, who was leaning back against the counter casually as he observed the two of you, pushed off as his son tunneled into his legs.

“Papa, Papa, are you proud of me?” He pleaded to know, staring up at him with wide eyes just like a koala as he hugged his father’s shins.

Shinsou patted his head, brushing the wispy curls away from his eyes and chuckled. “Of course I am, squirt.”

“Toshi!!” You scolded good-naturedly, pushing up onto your feet.

Despite the talk about how nonviolence is a better route you knew would have to come later, you simply picked up Naoki and rested him on your hip as Shinsou tapped your cheek and murmured into your ear that he was going to go check on things outside.

He tucked your hair behind your ear. “Will you be alright?”

You nodded reassuringly. “Of course. Go. But don’t beat him up too badly, love.”

Shinsou huffed out a curt laugh, the waggle of his eyebrows making you giggle, dissipating the tense atmosphere in an instant.

When he disappeared from the establishment, you took Naoki to the back room to get away from all the craziness and clamor that came with your son kicking the prick in the balls. Midoriya offered to help Todoroki with serving the food while you took care of your son.

“Here you go, little one.” You whispered as you gathered up the coloring books and crayons hidden away in the bigger desk, placing it on the smaller one Tokoyami built just for him.

Naoki clapped his hands excitedly, making grabby hands for it, a happy noise emitting from him as soon as gave it to him. “Thank you, Mama!!”

While he busied himself with coloring in a tiger with blues and yellows, you kept him company. That was, until the door clicked open.

You stood in a second, running over to him and flung your arms around his neck to hug him tight. Naoki remained engrossed in coloring in the Disney Princess on the page as you checked over the black panther.

“You okay?” You whispered shakily, a hint of fear slipping in as your collected façade cracked.

Shinsou rested his forehead against yours, breathing softly as he cupped your jaw. “Yes, I’m alright. Don’t worry, doll.”

The corners of your mouth twitched as you protested childishly, “... ‘m not worried.”

He exhales sharply, chuckling faintly at your characteristic stubbornness and hummed nonchalantly. “Whatever you say, princess.”

He lowered his voice, murmuring repeatedly that he was okay as your trembling fingers brushed over his bruised knuckles. They were a little busted up and bloody from a particularly hefty punch he delivered to the jerk’s jaw. He was going to feel that in the morning.

Shinsou kept you in his embrace for as long as Naoki took to finish coloring his picture. By the time he did, you had calmed down enough to go back out and finish your shift.

Wiping sweaty palms on your uniform, you sniffled and raised your head up high. You could do this. You had come a long way from the little girl who became paralyzed at the mere sight of a drop of blood.

He was a bit battered but he would heal. He was okay.

As you bustled about behind the counter, fighting back a smile as Kaminari sashayed up to you and asked for your favorite so that he could give it back to you, you laughed out loud when Shinsou smacked him upside the head for doing such a thing.

Naoki ran around, looking for more bullies to kick in the balls before Shoji caught onto what he was doing and diverted his attention to helping Jirou spin some tunes, with some earplugs in, of course, so that his hearing wasn’t damaged.

Shinsou’s cheeks colored as you stretched up on your tiptoes to press a gentle kiss to his temple.

“Thank you for defending my honor.” You whispered somewhat teasingly. “It’s nice to know that my boys have my back.”

His chest rumbled with laughter and an arm looped around your middle, drawing you close to his side as the night rush slowed down and you were finally given a chance to breathe. Tail wrapping around your hip, the cool metal of his ring kissed your skin as his fingers intertwined with yours.

Ignoring the banter of an indignant Naoki and a pouty Kaminari, Shinsou nudged his nose against your temple and sighed softly.

“Forever and always, doll.”

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sourwolphs · 4 years ago

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Like an Animal - Bucky x Reader (4/8)

Read on Ao3 (for better interface + formatting)

Summary: Reader is an enhanced Omega kidnapped by Hydra and trapped in a cell with Alpha Bucky Barnes. Tags: A/B/O, Protective Bucky Barnes, Protective Steve Rogers, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending Warnings: Rated M

Wanda used our winding trip from the medical bay all the way to the residential quarters to point out all the amenities in the massive Avenger compound. There was a gym packed with state-of-the-art equipment, a training room with a boxing ring and floor-to-ceiling padding, a lap pool, steel-and-glass conference rooms and office spaces, and even vibranium-reinforced practice rooms for enhanced members of the team. In the upper levels, we passed through the sprawling main kitchen, a lounge packed with plush red couches and a bar stocked with top-shelf alcohol, and a dark and cozy movie room with a massive projector screen.

I was still feeling weak and tired post-heat, and seeing the Avengers compound felt surreal, like I was walking through a dream. All those years I’d spent running… from what? From this? From resources? From a pack? From a chance to make a difference?

Maybe I was crazy to already feel like I belonged here, that I could use the abilities I never asked for to do good in the world, but walking through the compound with Wanda felt… right. I felt like I was coming home.

The only piece missing was him, and it was getting harder and harder to ignore the insistent tug in my chest seeking out Alpha.

Wanda showed me up to my floor, one level above the other residential floor with the common kitchen and lounge area. The pack’s living quarters were built like an apartment complex with hallways full of doors— some with name tags and goofy indicators of the inhabitants (like a cardboard cutout of Captain America with a Sharpie heart drawn on his face outside of a door marked “Wilson” and a fuzzy Halloween doormat covered in orange spiders outside of “Romanoff��).

“Well, here you are,” Wanda said. We stopped in front of a door at the end of the second hallway. Inside was a newly renovated one-bedroom apartment, complete with a kitchenette, living area, bathroom and closet. It was cozy and fully-stocked— sheets, towels, pillows, even pantry staples— and had clearly been decorated by someone with an eye for interior design. I wondered if Tony’s Omega had been in charge of it.

I surprised myself when I felt a tear slip down my cheek, emotions bubbling up inside my chest. I’d spent so many years living in dumps, sleeping on couches and in bathtubs, even on wooden pallets in the back of a restaurant where I had worked for six months, when I could have just listened to that agent and found my way here.

Wanda must have caught the sadness, anger, gratitude and guilt swirling in my scent because she wordlessly leaned in for a hug, her arms warm and firm around me. “You will always be welcome here,” she murmured. I took a deep, soothing inhale of her cinnamon sugar scent and immediately felt my heightened emotions calm— a courtesy of her comforting designation.

After Wanda left me to relax and settle in, I showered and changed into a plain set of loungewear I found in the dresser, climbing into the freshly made bed for a nap and some time to think.

I’d spent the bulk of my adult life running from difficult choices and responsibilities, preferring to scrape by under the radar, hiding both my abilities and my designation. Even just a few days ago, I probably would have given Wanda the slip and found my way to another state to start over. But something had changed in me. I wanted to try.

Maybe it was the fact that the threats the red-haired agent had warned me of had finally become a reality in that Hydra cell.

Or maybe it had something to do with him.

The pack left me alone for a few hours, which I spent getting in a quick power nap before snooping through the apartment, finding good hiding spots and plotting emergency escape routes— because old habits die hard.

I had my head in the closet, groping at a panel in the wall that could either be an air duct or a hidden electrical control panel, when someone knocked softly. As I approached the door, I couldn’t help but take in a deep breath— hoping for that smoky cedar scent on the other side— only to be met with a smooth and neutral Beta blend that was surprisingly familiar.

On the other side of the door stood the red-haired agent.

Last time I’d seen her, there had still been hints of blonde growing out at the ends of her hair. Now, it was cut in a short bob at her jawline, the deep red at her roots running solid through the strands. She smelled like rosewater and ozone— a garden before the rain.

“It’s you,” I couldn’t stop myself from saying. She smirked at me, pouting her lips, and I couldn’t help but feel remorseful. I hadn’t been the nicest when she’d found me last. My escape had involved quite a lot of…. frozen body parts.

“Hi, Y/L/N,” she said. “You’re looking a little less frosty than the last time I saw you.”

I laughed nervously, hoping she wasn’t here to give me a dressing down. I’d only frozen her limbs a little bit back at Fifth Street. Besides, I wasn’t in any state for a brawl, especially with my connection to my abilities still weak post-heat— not to mention the lingering effects of the Terrigen Crystal restraints. “Do you want to… come in?” I asked, opening the door wider.

The Beta nodded and slipped through the door, gaze sweeping around the room before she plopped onto a sectional in the living room. She was graceful and lithe, clad in all-black athleisure, hair pulled back behind her head in a delicate french braid.

“I should probably introduce myse—“

“Did you braid my hair for me?” I interrupted.

She smiled and laughed a little, looking surprised. “You noticed?” She asked, patting the braid at the back of her own head. “I’m surprised you didn’t wake up when I did it, actually. Wanda and I didn’t want you to come to and think you were back in that cell. We figured cleaning you up a bit in the medbay would help.”

I swallowed down the unexpected lump forming in my throat. No one had cared for me like that since my Mom had passed. “Thank you,” I choked out— but it came out more like a whisper. I took a seat on the edge of the couch across from her.

“It was nothing,” she said with a smile. “Anyway— Let me re-introduce myself. I’m Agent Natasha Romanoff, but you can call me Nat. Everyone does. I think we got off on the wrong foot last time we met,” she said with a smirk.

“I’m sorry… I—“ I dropped my head into my hands in embarrassment, groaning.

“Don’t apologize! I cornered you. I shouldn’t have. Besides, I deserved it for underestimating your… tenacity,” she winked. “I’m here to see how you’re holding up. And to fill you in on what you missed while you were out, and what we know so far.”

I nodded, urging her to continue.

“We found you and Bucky at a defunct Hydra base in Paraguay,” she began. My breath hitched at the mention of his name. “We also found a bunch of illegal rut and heat-inducing drugs, and obstetrics equipment, all of which we confiscated for analysis. When we found you, you were deep into a sympathy heat and Bucky was barely hanging on through his rut, but we managed to get you both to safety without incident.”

I was speechless. I knew Hydra was evil. They were the bogeymen of children’s nightmares when I was growing up, the big bad evil lurking just beneath the surface. But what were they planning…. And why me?

“You’re probably wondering why it was you,” Nat said, reading my mind. “We don’t know either. But like I said the last time we met… There are a lot of evil people out there who would love to get their hands on your abilities.”

“When you first came to me, that warning didn’t seem real,” I admitted. “It does now.”

Nat nodded. “And the offer I made to you back then still stands. You’re a damn strong woman to have made it through what you did, and the world needs more people like you protecting it. Bucky told us how you stood up to that Hydra douchebag.”

“Aw, shucks,” I said, trying to play it cool through the heat rising in my cheeks and the swoop of excitement in my stomach. They really wanted me here. “I can’t imagine why you’d want to keep me around, but if I’m being honest, I don’t really feel particularly safe leaving. At least not now.”

“Understandable,” she added. “Take your time getting settled in. We don’t run on any formal schedule around here— most of the pack either lives here or spends weekdays here. You’re welcome to use any of the facilities— except I don’t recommend poking around in Stark’s lab.”

We both laughed, and Nat stood, making her way back out of my new living space. “Oh— One more thing before I leave you alone,” she said, spinning gracefully on her heels. “Wanda asked me to tell you that if you want someone to train with, she’s happy to help.”

——-

I’d never had a pack. Not since my parents, anyway— but the three of us could hardly be considered one, with how isolated we were. So it genuinely surprised me how quickly and effortlessly I fit in at the compound.

It took a few days to find my footing. I spent long hours mapping out the maze of buildings, hallways and facilities from one edge of the campus to the other. But slowly, I started to carve out a routine with the people who lived here.

It was Sam who became my friend first. We met one morning in the common area kitchen, as I awkwardly buttered a slice of toast, planning to take it back to my room to eat alone. He’d just gotten back from a run, sweat sticking his shirt to his chest, making his normally neutral Beta scent strong and tropical. It reminded me of the beach— salty ocean breezes, lemon and lime. He was leaning against the counter, swigging down orange juice straight from the carton, and giving me an amused look. Before I could retreat to my room, he coaxed me to the countertop to keep him company while he ate.

We hit it off almost immediately, discovering everything we had in common. We both loved 60s music, enjoyed running in the mornings, and considered breakfast our favorite meal of the day. From that morning on, we made it a routine to cook elaborate egg, bacon and pancake breakfasts, the scent of which reliably drew pack members out of their rooms with bleary eyes and morning breath.

Soon, our morning breakfasts turned into pre-breakfast runs. I quickly learned that my abilities increased my stamina more than I had previously known, as I outpaced Sam most days. After 10 miles left him sweat-soaked and gasping for breath, I felt like I had the energy for another 20.

A week after our heart-to-heart in my apartment, I stumbled upon Natasha’s secret training room, located a few doors down from the gym and boxing ring and devised to look like a storage closet from the outside. It was a small, low-lit room with mirrors on the walls and a ballet bar running down the width. She was practicing pointe, hair tied back in a severe bun. I’d never learned to dance, but I liked to share space with her while she trained, marveling at the power and grace in her form. I started bringing a yoga mat there in the early afternoon when I knew I could find her there. I’d always enjoyed yoga— needed it, even. The grounding and meditation aspects of the practice helped me locate the source of the strange energy within me and wrangle it under control. With my body distracted by challenging physical forms, my mind was free to connect with that icy burn in my chest, memorizing how it channeled its way through my body.

I was overjoyed at my blossoming friendships with the two Betas, but at the end of the day, I found myself craving time with another Omega. Luckily, I had Wanda in my corner right from the jump. It’s common for pack Omegas to stick together, serving as sources of comfort and support to one another without any strings attached, and Wanda was generous with both. We’d spend the early evenings in comfortable silence, reading or watching 80s sitcoms. Some days, we’d even venture into the the reinforced training rooms so I could test out the strength of my abilities under supervision. Wanda never parted ways with me without a soothing hug, and I began to wonder if she needed them just as much as I did. Natasha had told me she was bonded, but I could never smell her mate on her, nor had I met him yet.

I ran into Steve last, on a Saturday afternoon. According to Nat, he’d been out on missions for my first week, which is why I hadn’t met him yet. I was outside, wandering the paths of the Avengers campus and soaking up the early spring sunshine.

Feeling uncharacteristically safe, I turned my head up towards the blue sky as I walked— which meant that I literally ran straight into Captain America. He was still suited up in navy tactical gear, dirt smudged across his cheek and in his golden hair, vibranium shield strapped to his back.

“Woah there,” he said, reaching out to steady me with just the tips of his fingers as I ricocheted off his chest.

I was immediately hit with his warm and inviting scent, like hot summer sunshine and old books. It felt strangely familiar and… comforting. He was huge, as most Alphas are, but his kind, open face and gentle scent felt to me more like that of a Beta or an Omega.

“S-Sorry,” I sputtered, taking a step back. His hands dropped to his sides. “Wasn’t looking where I was going— clearly”

“Steve Rogers,” he said with a smile, holding out his hand to shake.

I laughed, despite my initial nervousness. “Yeah, I know. Nice to meet you Captain America, I’m Y/N.”

Was that a… blush? Steve looked bashful. “Actually, we’ve already met, but I don’t think you remember. Last week. I…carried you out of that Hydra base.”

My eyes widened. That must be why I’d unconsciously associated his scent with safety.

Now it was my turn to blush— he’d carried me out while I was in heat. Sobbing, begging for my Alpha, slick running down my legs…

“Nat didn’t tell me that part,” I said quickly. “But thank you. Really. I owe you.”

He shook his head with a smile. “Happy to help.”

From that day on, Steve started accompanying Sam and I on our runs in the morning, much to Sam’s chagrin. Not even I could keep up with Steve’s superhuman stamina, but teaming up on Sam to outrace him made us laugh until our sides were in stitches.

After I’d accidentally let it slip that the only major movie franchises I’d watched were Star Wars and Toy Story, Sam took it upon himself to “educate” me on the best action movies of the 90s and 2000s every evening. In just a few weeks, we tore through Mortal Kombat, Point Break, Die Hard, the Matrix trilogy, and the Mission Impossible series. Steve would often join us, cramming his huge body onto the compact couches in the movie room. Even Natasha found time at the end of the day to curl up with us, critiquing the outlandish hand-to-hand combat moves on the projector screen and throwing popcorn every time the choreography offended her expert sensibilities.

Though I felt closest and most comfortable with Sam, Wanda, Nat and Steve, I slowly got to know the other pack members as well. Stark, who spent most of his time tinkering in his lab, sent updates to me through FRIDAY on any new information their analysis had uncovered from the confiscated Hydra equipment. Dr. Banner, a shy Omega who smelled peculiarly like sage and burnt caramel, was helping Stark analyze the equipment, and would often share updates as well. Pepper, Stark’s Omega, was a human ray of sunshine. She checked on me more than a few times, always asking how the facilities were treating me and urging me to ask for anything I needed.

Altogether, my first three weeks with the pack were a dream come true. But as much as I loved every minute of my new life here, there was something— rather, someone— missing.

My first day waking up at the compound, I’d half expected Bucky to come find me. After all, we’d been through something terrible together. Part of me stupidly believed he’d swoop in to comfort me, apologize for not being by my bedside when I woke up and reassure me that everything was going to be fine. But that was just a silly fantasy concocted by my Omega hindbrain. He never showed. And nobody seemed to be talking about him, either— at least not to me.

After Wanda had reacted so strangely to my questions about his whereabouts when I woke up, I held back from asking any follow-up questions of Sam, Nat or Steve. I’d never had an Alpha in my life. My parents had been Betas. I didn’t know if it was normal for an Omega to feel this connected, this obsessive. And frankly, I didn’t want to be weird.

After a few weeks, I started to grow used to my Omega brain thinking about him by default— his delicious scent, his icy blue eyes, the feel of his fingers gently carding through my hair, the pressure of his teeth on my neck. More often than not, I found myself unconsciously scenting different rooms in the compound, seeking out that cedar smell before I entered. But I never caught it.

I struggled to sleep at night. After feeling it once, unlike anything I’d experienced before, my body viscerally craved the comfort of his Alpha purr. The craving was so strong that sometimes I couldn’t rest for hours— tossing and turning, piling pillows and blankets on the bed to imitate the safety of a nest. Running with Sam and Steve in the morning helped tire me out. So did practicing yoga with Nat, and exhausting my abilities in the training room with Wanda. But there was always something missing. And try as I might, I couldn’t shake it.

If I didn’t know better, I’d think that I was experiencing bond withdrawal. But without a mating bite, that explanation was impossible.

————

If Bucky hadn’t been tortured by Hydra for 70 years, he would say that this was the worst pain he’d ever experienced. It didn’t compare to having his brain scrambled by electricity, but it was damn close.

After the quinjet had landed at base after the rescue, and Sam had scooped up Y/N to ferry her to the medbay, Bucky pulled Steve aside on the landing strip, tearing his eyes away from Sam’s back retreating into the compound.

“I think it would be best if I… went away for a while,” Bucky said, unable to make eye contact with his best friend. He studied Steve’s boots, dirt-smudged and scuffed from combat.

“Buck, I don’t like where your head’s at,” Steve said gently, placing a grounding hand on his shoulder. “You just got dosed up on synthetic rut and locked up with an Omega in heat for some messed up…forced breeding crap. It’s not like you did anything wrong. This isn’t on you.”

Bucky bit his tongue, hard. That’s where Steve was wrong. He had done something wrong— and even if he hadn’t succumbed to what Hydra wanted from him, he still needed to keep himself away from Y/N. This close, he could still smell traces of the Omega’s heat lingering on Steve. Even without rut, it was turning his inner Alpha feral with want.

“Just a few weeks, is all. Make sure she’s okay?” Bucky said, knowing he didn’t have to ask. The pack would take care of her. “She’s strong— she told those Hydra agents to fuck off— but she shouldn’t have to be. Not after this.”

Steve gave him his signature earnest look, chewing his lower lip with concern, before sighing out his agreement.

Bucky had spent the past few weeks in a cramped studio apartment the pack kept for emergencies in Brooklyn. He’d hardly left the space, sleeping fitful hours in the night, interrupted by nightmares. He’d paced the floor in front of the only window so many times in his agitation that he thought he was starting to see grooves in the wood.

At all hours of the day, he ached for her scent, still vivid in his Alpha hindbrain— sharp and crisp as snow but just as sugary sweet as peppermint. Embarrassingly, he’d taken to snacking on a crumbling jar of mints he’d found in the back of the pantry, letting the artificial scent soothe his racing thoughts as they melted on his tongue. It wasn’t as good as the real thing, but it helped— especially since his whole body felt like it was prickling with need nonstop, chest cracking open, aching for her touch. His Alpha wrestled with his conscious brain to remember every small detail of her, from the gentle curve of her waist to her soft lips, the feeling of her hair between his fingertips, her unbelievable scent.

If he didn’t know better, he’d think he was going through fucking bond withdrawal. With an Omega he’d spent maybe seven hours with.

If Bucky’d had it his way, he would have stayed holed up in the apartment until this… thing had run its course. But after three weeks, Steve had finally had enough of his self-isolating nonsense, and had showed up at the door of the apartment to drag Bucky back with his metaphorical tail between his legs.

Bucky could tell his best friend didn’t know exactly why he was so opposed to returning home, though he figured Steve had an inkling of what was going on just from the lingering scent of suffering and guilt that had soaked into the peeling wallpaper of the studio.

“Everything’s fine, Buck. She’s settling in great— you’ll see. Wanda, Sam and Nat love her,” he said reassuringly, the unspoken I do, too hung in the air between them. Even with three weeks of distance between them, Bucky still couldn’t forgive himself for not being the Alpha to rescue her from that cell, for being so caught up in his own urges that he couldn’t be the hero that Steve was.

Bucky spent the majority of the car ride back to the compound stewing in self-hatred and anxiety, wondering if his return would be what tipped Y/N over the edge, sending her back into hiding. Then it would be undeniably his fault that she left. His fault that she was taken from everyone in the pack. Mercifully, Steve said nothing about his inner turmoil stinking up the car, only rolling down the window a crack to let in the cool spring air.

Even after all that time spent stewing in his thoughts, Bucky still wasn’t prepared to see her the minute he got back to the compound.

When he stepped out of the elevator on his floor, duffel bag thrown over his shoulder, he was immediately hit with three scents at once— a hot spike of concern from Steve, a dose of Nat’s joyful rosewater smell, and her. Peppermint. This time sweet, happy and warm like a cup of mint tea.

The two women were laughing together, lounging on the plush red couches of the living space, but their laughter cut off sharply as the ding of the elevator sounded. Bucky froze like a deer in headlights as they both turned to look his way.

Time seemed to slow down as their eyes connected. His eyes frantically scanned her face and body for evidence of injury, documenting the healthy glow in her cheeks, the brightness of her eyes, her soft hair pulled back in one of Nat’s french braids. She looked… happy. Healthy. Beautiful.

Unconsciously, he felt his hackles raise when he noticed Nat’s hand circled around Y/N’s ankle where it was stretched out towards her lap.

“Hey Buck, long time no see,” Nat said with an uncharacteristic gentleness, shaking him out of his stupor. Both women were giving him a concerned look, now, the smiles drifting off of their faces.

Rather than say or do anything he regretted, Bucky elected not to say or do anything at all. Coward, his Alpha snarled at him as he strode down the hallway to his bedroom. Go back there and claim your Omega.

“Buck!” Steve called after him, concern coloring his tone. “Bucky!”

But Bucky ignored him, holding his breath to avoid her scent until his apartment door was shut tight behind his back.

#like an animal #my fic #bucky fic #bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky reader insert #marvel fic #bucky barnes

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boop-le-snoot · 4 years ago

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PARTY FAVOURS I CHAPTER 13

first time readers click here 💖

TWs/Summary: In this house, we ship Reader/Tony's Rolls-Royce. Reader and Tony being dorks on a date. That's it that's the chapter. Lots of sass and Tony being Tony.

A question for my readers: Are you still invested? How's the slow burn? Is everything realistic? 👉🏻👈🏻🥺

As usual, my beta is @miscmarvelwritings . I love her.

"Nice digs, Cupcake."

"Nice ride, Tin Man."

The sass fell from my lips, warm and familiar, paving the way for our upcoming debut like the old, soft living room rug. Any awkwardness I had expected there to be left the moment I saw Tony pull up to my front gate in his Royce: the man was just that extra. The size of my estate, the five-figure outfit of mine - it paled in comparison to his own clout.

In a world where my choices were usually distributed between stuck-up rich boys or insecure middle-class men, Tony was a fresh drink of water with his absolute indifference towards my and his own net worth.

I wasn't afraid to admire said ride, either. Being a huge petrolhead was what got me interested in engineering, physics and computer sciences in the first place. The desire for speed grew into thirst for knowledge: how to get more horsepower, how to tune, how to mod. No mechanic took an eighteen year old rich-girl seriously even when I had all the lingo right, I had to be a step ahead, at all times, if I wanted my ride to be the best. And I never settled for less than that.

"No driver?" I inquired for the reason behind the unusual behaviour. After all, a Rolls' wasn't the kind of car you drive personally. All the amenities it had, it had in the back.

"Gave Happy a day off," Tony remarked absently. I noticed the small quirk of his eyebrow, however. He was intrigued.

I decided to give it a shot. "So what, this thing packs, what, about five-fifty horses?" I mused, watching Tony nearly swerve into the opposite lane. "At two and a half tons, it's still gotta be pretty quick with that V12-turbo. How fast it go?" The satisfaction was immeasurable, as pleasant to my soul as sitting in a heated leather chair with the smell of a new car, engine quietly rumbling in front of me. And by quietly I mean, it was focus-or-you'll-miss-it kind of quiet.

"Well aren't you full of surprises, baby girl," Tony grinned; a happy, excited grin even. It made his face lose ten years of age just like that. "Zero to sixty in five and a half seconds," He said after a moment.

"Not bad," I said, sounding impressed. I already knew that but I wasn't planning on robbing Tony out of well deserved praise for his choice in vehicles.

"Got a ride of your own?" He asked with a smile, like he didn't know it already. No background check would have skipped my three speeding tickets, but I concur. This game was fun.

"I do, actually. It's a 2008 Range Rover. Supercharged," I added in the end, just to emphasise.

"A big car for such a little girl," Tony whistled playfully.

"I'm compensating," I deadpanned. "I'm a little slow on the uptake, y'know, so my Rangie with five hundred horses makes up for it. Gotta keep it balanced."

Tony chewed on his lip. "Five hundred? Haven't heard about that, it comes with three-ninety-five in stock," His eyebrow wiggled. "Tuned it?" He cast me a contemplative glance.

"Yup," I exclaimed happily. As far as the date, I would have been utterly ecstatic to talk about cars all evening. Screw the boring "where do you see yourself in five years" questions, talk to me about your favourite engine swaps. Concept cars, give me those. Monster trucks? Yes, please. Vintage low-riders? Couldn't wait to get my grubby little hands on one. Gimmee!

Tony kept his silence and kept his press smile starting the moment we set foot on getting out of the car. The place he'd taken me to was ridiculously upscale and fancy; the valet hesitated only for a second before catching the keys Tony so carelessly tossed in his direction. There was almost no fear in his body language when the boy approached the massive, expensive vehicle.

The hostess smiled big at Tony and gave me the world's biggest stink-eye when he looked the other way but what else is new? As soon as she left us in the privacy of our booth, I didn't hesitate to stick my tongue at her retreating back. A brief lapse in maturity, if you will.

Tony cackled, growing suddenly serious. "Did she bother you? I can get her fired. I should get her fired."

"Nah," I shrugged. "Don't really care, just wanted to showcase my amazing sense of humour." Snorting, I gave Tony a wink and a secretive grin.

"You really don't give a fuck, do you," His eyebrows twitched again, a sign of mild interest that I noted during our routine sciencing time together. Tony was incredibly expressive if one took the time to observe.

"I could suck your dick under the table right now," I answered honestly. "It's just that when God gave out things like dignity and shame, I wasn't home. Too many fun things to do, y'know," I spoke as casually as I could even though I was dying of laughter inside.

Eyes bulging, jaw hanging mid-way to the floor. Tony was serving Looks™ and I didn't mean just the white tee and purple blazer combo. "Princess, you're going to be the fucking death of me!" He took a sip from his water glass, smirking.

Finally releasing my mirth, I gathered my hands in a lock in front of me. His own, warm and calloused, reached over - I allowed the brief intimacy, clasping them, fiddling with the leather band of his watch. For a moment, it was just us, sitting in the dim light, discovering each other anew to Robert Johnson singing the blues and NYC bustling with life just behind the wall.

The waiter took our orders - and if I totally butchered the Italian, Tony was gentleman enough not to make any remarks.

"Somehow, every time I am with you, you both manage to meet my expectations to a T and surprise me at the same time," I wasn't able to completely ignore my nerves. My hand was still loosely in his and he didn't mind at all, me messing with his watch.

"How so?"

"I'm going to loosely quote someone, bear with me." Mr Davies's words popped into my mind just as I was wondering how to best articulate my feelings. "You're eccentric and interesting because it's, well, it's you, because it would be much weirder if we'd be sitting here and making boring small-talk and asking each other the genetic get-to-know-you questions," I briefly paused to sip my Dom Peringon and stare at our hands. Gathering my wits. "That would be why I don't do dates. It sounds so tedious on paper, just sorting through people until a person that's not absolutely mind-numbing comes around."

Tony was silent for a moment, the sheen of his eyes, the faraway look; he was lost in memories. Probably remembering all the girls he had charmed before. I didn't doubt it was easy for him: his smile was distracting and people usually were attracted to shiny things. He shone plenty. Also, most people were stupid, they never cared to look past the golden wrapper. I was convinced there was a diamond under it. But then again, I was biased.

"I've never thought about it that way, but I guess you're right," He finally said, serious. "With Pepper, at least, it was. Come to think of it, we never had that much in common, besides Stark Industries and her willingness to put up with my shit." It was painful for him to talk about her, that much was obvious. His laugh was forced and sardonic.

I, on the other hand, never understood why they got together in the first place. Or maybe I did - but the cold, composed Pepper and the chaotic, energetic Tony reminded me too much of my own parents. All four people in this fucked up equation could have been much happier if they choose... What? Being alone? That was terrifying, too.

I kept quiet, giving his hands a gentle squeeze.

"You know, this is so bizarre. Even an eighteen year old kid has got it figured out," He suddenly said, his tone bitter like the coffee that he loved.

"Woah, slow down," I put up a hand. "I never said I know what to do. I just said I know what NOT to do." The 'kid' remark would have made me eye-roll so hard my skull would crack any day. In this context, however, it was pretty spot on.

Tony snorted. "And how did you come by that information, pray tell, Baby?"

I huffed. "Have you met my parents?" We simultaneously cringed and I hurried to erase that mental image. "I make fun of myself for being into old dudes all the time," I made air quotes around the phrase that made Tony scoff, "But, honestly speaking, I've never even been on a date. Like a real one. Usually it's twenty minutes and I'm falling asleep mid-conversation. People can't seem to keep up with me or something," I felt genuinely dejected. "So many meaningless questions, so many downright idiotic comments. From men," I pointed out the obvious. "My mother used to tell me she thought I was gay because I didn't act like a girl... Whatever that means."

"That sounds pretty shitty," Tony was studying me like one would have been looking at an exotic animal in a zoo. "That said, I agree."

"That I don't act like a girl?" I teased him, the left corner of my mouth tilting upward. "Fuck that noise. I want to drive fast cars, drink straight liquor and have orgasms. If that makes me a dude... I look pretty good for a dude in a dress."

We laughed in unison, tension evaporating under the shared, mutual understanding. With Tony, it was easy. The waiter brought our selected dishes. Blink-and-he's-gone. Top notch service.

"A dude in a dress, can't say I'm surprised 'bout your lack of dates," He remarked conversationally, happily digging into his food. The noises he made were intriguing, to say the least, and I followed suit on my own food, finding it absolutely delicious. A delicious meal with a delicious man at my side. I refused to feel guilty about my thoughts.

"I guess I have exactly one (1) date on my ledger now," I raised my argument.

The fork clattered as Tony once again, came to a sudden realization. "Holy shit, you weren't kidding."

"No shit," I gave into the urge to roll my eyes. "But on the upside, my first date was with the most gorgeous, intelligent and witty bachelor of the city. I'd say I don't have it all that bad," I quirked an eyebrow at him.

"Aw, you're making me blush," Tony recovered quickly, grinning. "And don't be shy. The most desired bachelor of the country, if not the world."

I shook my head. "No, the world's most delectable bachelor is one of the Saudi princes. What's-his-name, the one who posts goat and horse pics on Insta," I snapped my fingers a couple of times, trying to remember the name as Tony looked at me all offended. "Anyways, you get my point. I could have a go at him, don't you think?" Cocking my shoulder, coyly twirling the strap of my dress, I gave Tony my best come-hither look and was rewarded with an appreciative once-over. His eyes were growing hungry again.

"You're a million dollar baby," He finally said, voice low. "And the extent of people I would be willing to share you with is very small."

That got me interested, sudden heat prickling underneath my skin. The conversation took a turn I didn't expect it to; and there lied the delight of being around Tony. He was always ready to surprise, in the best way. "Tell me," I requested politely.

"That's a conversation for another time," He was enjoying the chit-chat, desire beginning to creep into his features.

"Mmm, you think?" I allowed the strap of my dress to slip down my shoulder, exposing a collarbone, showing him just how far I was willing to go to satisfy my curiosity.

He swallowed audibly. "I think... You're smart enough to figure it out," He finally gritted his teeth, finishing off his dinner and immediately calling for the check.

I wasn't done yet, however. The possibility of riling him up, taunting him into a lustful frenzy - I was in heaven. Karma had favoured me that evening, it had given me a chance to get Tony back for all the times he unknowingly made my mouth water and my brain go blip. "Must be Steve then," I bit my lip in thought.

Honestly? I was as clueless as the couple next table over. Steve it wasn't, that much I knew for sure, he and Tony had their little love/hate dramatic connection that always ended in a massive ego standoff. Tony would be on the frontline fighting against Steve if the blonde dared to show anything even remotely resembling romantic interest towards someone Tony himself had his eyes on.

"Princess," Tony growled, sarcastically raising an eyebrow.

"Not Steve," I replied, cracking a smile. Success! "You know, I'm really bad at guessing who's into me. Unless someone is balls deep in me," My face was mere inches away as we quickly shrugged on our coats. "And even then, I can't be sure."

My giggling was accompanied by Tony shaking his head in exasperated fashion; he took my hand nonetheless and I happily swayed it between us, poster child for "not a care in the world". He allowed it, maintaining the same exasperated air about him, and I let him. Fondness and happiness seeped through that anyways.

"Brat," His voice was kind. And his kiss tingled where he left it on the corner of my mouth, sweet and short. "Here, have a go," Before I could react, the keys to his Rolls Royce were placed in my palm and he was making his way around the car to the passenger's side.

THE TAG LIST IS NOW OPEN! @another-stark-sub @mostly-marvel-musings @vozit @littlegasps @pilloclock @shereadsinquiet @downeyreads @hermione-grangers-wife @individualistfem @sleep-i-ness @capbrie @lillsxd @agustdowney @dee-vn @justanotherblonde23 @fanngirl19 @persephonehemingway (it finally let me tag you)! @softie-socks @schemefrenzy

#tony stark x reader #tony stark x you #tony stark x y/n #bruce banner x reader #bruce banner x you #bruce banner x y/n #stephen strange x reader #stephen strange x y/n #stephen strange x you #party favours #bun writes

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tales-unique · 4 years ago

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MEMORIES OF THE WEST II

When dawn breaks you watch the sky blossom with pink, purple and blue, the morning chorus of birds serenading you with their beautiful calls. The camp is relatively quiet, barely a sound from anyone save the occasional snore here and there. The horses snort as they graze on the edges of camp and you finally sit up, taking in your surroundings properly for the first time. It isn’t so much big as it has more carts and tents than your kidnappers camp, more amenities too — this is a home base rather than a pit-stop. There’s tables with the remnants of card games and bottles on them, and animal skulls and chimes decorate the carts and trees. It looks homely, in a rustic kind of way, like when your daddy used to take you and your brother hunting in the woods and you’d set up tents in the wilderness under the open sky. Peeking to your side you see Tilly and Mary-Beth are still sound asleep, but you don’t see Karen and you wonder if she’s already awake or not. You haven’t seen, or heard, her yet. There’s another couple of women who you haven’t yet met sleeping on bedrolls in front of the cart next to yours and you study them for a moment before carefully standing and stretching. All your muscles are aching, your wrists sting with the effort, but you feel revitalized in a way you haven’t before. Guess a near death experience will do that to someone.

Philosophical thoughts aside, you realize that there’s not much you can do while everyone’s still sleeping without seeming like a snoop. But that doesn’t stop your curiosity from taking over. Quietly, you try to navigate about the camp without drawing attention to yourself and against your better judgement you wander between the tents and carts, looking over the members of the camp with an almost childlike wonder — you’ve never been among roaming folk like this before and you’re almost envious of how free they appear to be. Like a startled deer you bolt as quietly as you can when you hear movement, the shuffle of someone turning in their sleep, almost prancing in the dewy grass towards the treeline to hide. From your place hidden behind a tree you wait for the consequence of your prying with bated breath. When it doesn’t come you exhale deeply, resting against scratchy bark in relief. A snort behind you roots you to the spot momentarily, until you’re nudged forward by an inquisitive snout looking to get at the soft shoots you've so rudely been blocking. You step to the side to allow the horse it’s meal, smiling warmly. They’re all so beautiful, and well kept, that you can’t help but admire them. Then you spot the horse that Charles had been riding; an Appaloosa mare, whose name you sadly didn’t catch. “Hey there, girl,” you coo, slow in your approach as you step over to where she grazes. You don’t want to spook her. “Aren’t you a beauty!” The way the sun catches on her back makes her coat shine and you think for a minute that she’s the prettiest horse you’ve ever seen. Well, except your Ginger. That mare would always have a special place in your heart, no matter what. Your singular focus makes you blind to the attention you’ve attracted. An early riser, Charles notices you coaxing his horse into letting you stroke her as he gets a cup of coffee. Taima is, understandably, wary of you at first but she soon warms to you as you gently smooth your hand over her back and scratch behind her ears. While you lavish attention on Taima as the sun rises, you catch movement in your peripheral and look up to see Charles walking over, coffee cup glinting in hand. “She likes you,” he muses, looking between you and Taima. “Really?” You murmur, a fond smile coming to your lips, “I’m glad, I like her too.” There’s a comfortable silence between you as you both bask in the early morning sunshine and each other's company, but all too quickly it melts away into reality when the rest of the camp starts to wake and go about its business. Mary-Beth and Tilly greet you warmly, as well as Charles, when they go for coffee. Karen is still passed out, drunk, on her bedroll, snoring, and you wonder how you could have missed her when you were looking around camp. An older, sterner woman passes you, greeting Charles while giving you a once over. He greets her as Miss Grimshaw. You kindly say good morning ma’am. She doesn’t look impressed as she pointedly humphs and you wilt under her gaze. It only worsens when you look away and spot Dutch staring right at you from his open tent, squinting at you with an unreadable expression. At his side stands two other men, neither of whom you have met yet, one looking worried while he talks at Dutch and the other scowling as he toes the dirt. The three of them seem to be the ones that the others answer to, and so you quickly avert your eyes out of respect. “What’re they going to do with me?” You swallow nervously, turning your gaze to Charles expectantly with big doe eyes. He spares a glance in the direction of Dutch and the others and sighs, shaking his head. “Honestly? They’ll probably pack you up on a horse and send you on your way. Escorted, so you don’t come back.” You frown, your hands gently combing through Taima’s mane. “Well, I’ll be escorted a long way then,” you huff, “only home I have right now is with my brother William, and he’s in Saint Denis.” This time the silence is stifling, but you don’t dare to look at Charles. Your sourness is uncalled for and you know it— he’s given you the honest answer that you asked for, you have no right to be mad at him. And yet you are, because they’re treating you like a threat when you have no reason to be one. Luckily you don’t have time to ruminate on your actions. “Mr. Smith, would you mind if I have a word with our new guest , alone?” The way Dutch says the word has your back up instantly and you have to bite your tongue to keep from spewing venom. You glance up at Charles and see that his gaze is on you, sympathetic, but you know that he won’t stay to defend you. “Sure,” he nods, leaving you alone with Dutch at the edge of camp. You’ve never been more on edge. Holding your breath. Eyes pinned to the man dressed sharp as a nail. “Charles told me of your unfortunate encounter,” Dutch starts out, glancing back at the camp before looking at you with what you suppose is sympathy but is actually pity . You don’t buy it for a second. He’s a charmer , like the men your mother would tell you about when you were young. Never believe a word they say, she told you, because it’s all just smoke and mirrors until they have you where they want you. “I just can’t imagine what that must have felt like. Why, our own poor Mrs Adler went through a similar thing, at the hands of O'Driscolls too no less! So I offer our most sincere apologies,” he continues, shaking his head, “but, as you can see, we’re one too many as it is and a respectable young woman like yourself has no business running with a band of miscreants like us!” The urge to roll your eyes is hard to ignore but you manage to resist, instead offering a tight-lipped smile. “I appreciate the sentiment, Sir—” “Please,” he laughs, waving his hand dismissively, “call me Dutch . And I may call you, miss—?" “—DuBois. As I said, Dutch , I’m real grateful to have been found. They didn’t have to stay and help me, they could have left me there, but they didn’t, and then the women help clean me up and dress me,” there’s a slight shake to your voice, an obvious sign of nerves, and you know that Dutch sees it by the way his eyes squint ever so slightly at you. “I feel I owe somethin’ back, f-for their trouble. Their kindness .” You conclude, clasping your hands together tightly in front of you as Taima walks away from you towards a fresh hay bale. You suddenly feel vulnerable and downright stupid for wanting to stay, your mothers yelling echoing in your head for being so damned naive . These people were similar to the ones who had taken you, if assumptions were to be believed, yet here you were pleading your case to stay with them; absolute madness. Dutch is quiet for a time, stroking his mustache, no doubt contemplating your argument. All while you stand there stock still, big eyes filled with anxiousness. “Miss DuBois, you seem like a fine girl, but forgive me for being dubious. I simply just don’t know what help you could be to us, unless you’re hiding a stash of money or something of the like!” He laughs, an obvious joke, but it’s just the opening you need. A smile slowly spreads to your lips; two birds with one stone, coming right up. “Well, I sure don’t,” you muse innocently, rocking on the balls of your feet, “but I sure know someone who does .” The look on Dutch’s face is priceless.

#RDR2 #RDR2 Imagine #RDR2 Imagines #Red Dead Redemption 2 #Red Dead Redemption 2 Imagine #Red Dead Redemption 2 Imagines #Arthur Morgan #Arthur Morgan Imagine #Arthur Morgan Imagines

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countessmorgasson · 4 years ago

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Ride Along

Fluffy Nadia x MC! Horseback riding with the Countess herself <3

Gender Neutral MC

(Disclaimer: Based on Nadia’s route, minor spoilers. Also, I don’t know shit about riding horses lmao)

Even though you wake alone, you’re happy.

The silk sheets are cool against your skin, and the sun makes the room around you shimmer. You turn to the right, where Nadia should be asleep next to you. You don’t have much luck getting her to sleep in on a weekday, but you’ll get there someday.

Smiling, you scoff at how neatly she left her side of the bed.

You dress yourself as nicely as you can, eager to see the Countess; even if it was for a few moments while she rushed between meetings and other royal duties.

To your surprise, Nadia herself greets you at the foot of the stairs, a broad smile lighting up her crimson eyes. You find your feet picking up the pace, and you rush to greet her back with a morning kiss.

That was something you’d never get used to. The food at the palace was one thing, the large bathtubs and clothes so luxurious you were afraid to wear them were all fun amenities, but the best thing about your life was the woman standing in front of you.

“Good morning, my love.” You press another kiss to each of her cheeks, a little sheepish over how late you must have slept in. If Nadia’s not headed to a meeting, you really must be late waking up.

“Did you sleep well, m/c?” Her voice is like butter.

“Of course,” you say.

“Good. I’ve cancelled the rest of my appointments for the day; I’d love for you to join me at the stables.”

Ah. Your smile must show your sudden anxieties, but you muster up all the excitement you can.

“Absolutely!”

You’ve never ridden a horse in your life- before you met Nadia, of course. Magic was the thing you were good at. Card readings, aura channeling, you’re the one they go to. But practically... anything else, you were still shaky at.

Frankly, you blame yourself for ever dying in the first place. Surely there were other things you could do before then. Maybe you were even good at riding horses.

You fidget while Nadia eyes you. She looks beautiful- as if that’s a shock. You just love the way her violet hair piles on top of her head in a braid. She has such a classy, confident aura about her when she wears these clothes, you note.

She catches you eyeing her, and raises her eyebrow with a playful smirk.

“Why don’t you ride with me this time, m/c?” She offers.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean that we’ll share- you can sit behind me...” she blushes underneath her smile. “Or if you’d like, I’ll hold on to you.”

You mount her favorite horse, clumsily straddling along its back. Oh, the things you do for love. Nadia adjusts herself behind you with ease, and you smell her lavender perfume when she playfully nuzzles against your neck.

“I like this,” she admits. “We have to do this more often.”

You chuckle in agreeance, but your grip on the horse’s reins nearly has your knuckles going white. Luckily for you, you’ve got an expert at your side. Or rather, behind you.

Before you know it, you’re strolling in peace, breathing in the crisp air and occasionally relaxing yourself enough to enjoy your surroundings.

“This is nice.” You admit.

“It is.” Nadia’s voice is softer than usual, like she’s deep in thought. “Thank you for joining me.”

For a few blissful moments you’re both silent, eyes wandering around the trail. You occasionally look back to Nadia, nerves calmed by her smile.

The longer you walk, the more Vesuvia seems to linger farther away, the sun’s reflection glimmering on the palace rooftops.

Yes, these were the days you both dreamed of. A city that was once broken, unable to provide for its people had transformed into something beyond your wildest expectations. And it was all thanks to Nadia. Sure, you might have had a hand in things, but at the end of the day she was the Countess, and how lucky you all were to live under her reign.

How lucky you were to be her beloved...

“M/c!”

You’re too lost in admiration to pay attention to the horse beneath you. You didn’t have that connection that Nadia did with the animal- and it’s obvious, by the way you desperately buck against the creature’s back. You have no idea what to expect- what’s going on?!

It happens quickly. Nadia’s smart enough to steady herself and brace for the sudden turn, but you’re painfully dragged back into reality the moment you feel your body in the air.

You topple off the horse, crashing down into a bush.

“Ahhh!”

“Oh dear-!”

Nadia scrambles off the horse and rushes to your side, where you’re spitting out dirt and groaning at your ripped clothing.

“M/c, are you hurt?! That was quite a fall.”

As if she spoke it into existence, you start to notice aches and pains throughout your body. You start to panic- you’ve never fallen off a horse like that. Did you sprain anything? It doesn’t seem like it... then what’s this pain?

You feel your entire face heat up.

How humiliating!

Nadia doesn’t give it a second thought. She’s already got her manicured hands on you, examining for any major injuries. You stare in silence, partly unsure how to respond- you’re just so mortified. What kind of fool falls off a horse with their hands on the reins?

“Ah, I’m fine...” you start. It doesn’t ease the worry on Nadia’s face until you stand up with her. Your tailbone feels a bit sore, but there’s no way you’re going to admit to her that you literally fell on your ass.

“Let’s get ourselves home. Oh... I hate to make you get back on, but we’re quite a ways from the palace. We’ll have to ride back.”

Yup.

You’re still mortified, but you’ve finally arrived home.

I should have pretended to pass out. I can’t believe this.

Part of you wants to laugh, but you’re silent, hidden away in your shared bedroom while Nadia examines you more thoroughly. It turns out you didn’t land the fall unscathed.

You bear a few marks here and there. Minor scratches and bruises- ones that you could easily erase yourself with a simple press of your fingertips. That being said... something holds you back from healing yourself.

Nadia’s playing the role of a doctor, catering to your injuries.

She traces over each scrape with a warm washcloth, no matter how small of a scratch it is. The damp fabric is soothing against your cold skin, making your muscles relax underneath her touch. Her eyes are fixed intensely on what she’s doing- making sure every part of you is treated with care.

You sit in silence, eyes following her every move. You study her, really. It’s fascinating to see her like this- knowing she could easily have doctors tend to you- knowing you could do this yourself.

She hums to herself, kissing the marks on your back and tracing along the scrapes as if she could erase them with her touch.

“Thank you, my love.” You say. “I feel much better.”

It’s true. Maybe love is medicine.

“Good.” She raises an eyebrow towards you, and you see a glimpse of her playful nature shine through her haughty expression. “Because I’m not quite done with you yet. We still have a few hours before dinner time, do we not?”

“W-what did you have in mind?” You try not to let your nerves take over.

You may have gotten the best of the Devil, but you got your ass handed to you by a horse- and you’re not sure if you can handle more adventure tonight..

“Don’t look so afraid, m/c! The last thing I want to do is put you under any more stress today. I’ll have a bath drawn for us.”

You swear you can physically feel your bones settle from the relief. You find yourself starting to laugh.

It’s really kind of funny, now that the embarrassment’s rubbed off. You can’t get the image of yourself toppling into a bush out of your head. How the hell did Nadia keep a straight face?

It’s like she read your mind, and before you know it the two of you are giggling like children.

You sit like that for a few moments, enjoying each other’s laughter.

It’s so nice to see Nadia smile- truly smile. Her entire face lights up and her giggles somehow feel so special- maybe because you’re the only one who really gets to see her like this.

Everything about her is enchanting- even when you’re suffering through a bruised tailbone and a memory that’s forever burned into your head, you’re just so in love, you’d do it all over again if it’d make her laugh like this.

“Come, dear.” Nadia extends her arm forward. She’s still wearing her riding clothes. You’re finally brought to your feet, eager to soak in a pool of warm water.

“I think you’ve earned yourself a massage.”

#the arcana #the arcana fic #the arcana nadia #nadia satrinava #nadia #mine #my writing #nadia x mc #countess nadia #fluffy #fluff #funny?#funny

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azzy-the-christian-furry · 4 years ago

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((Revelation, Part 3))

Ch.18:

Lament Over Fallen Babylon

18 After this I saw another angel coming down from heaven. He had great authority, and the earth was illuminated by his splendor. 2 With a mighty voice he shouted:

“‘Fallen! Fallen is Babylon the Great!’[a]

She has become a dwelling for demons

and a haunt for every impure spirit,

a haunt for every unclean bird,

a haunt for every unclean and detestable animal.

3 For all the nations have drunk

the maddening wine of her adulteries.

The kings of the earth committed adultery with her,

and the merchants of the earth grew rich from her excessive luxuries.”

Warning to Escape Babylon’s Judgment

4 Then I heard another voice from heaven say:

“‘Come out of her, my people,’[b]

so that you will not share in her sins,

so that you will not receive any of her plagues;

5 for her sins are piled up to heaven,

and God has remembered her crimes.

6 Give back to her as she has given;

pay her back double for what she has done.

Pour her a double portion from her own cup.

7 Give her as much torment and grief

as the glory and luxury she gave herself.

In her heart she boasts,

‘I sit enthroned as queen.

I am not a widow;[c]

I will never mourn.’

8 Therefore in one day her plagues will overtake her:

death, mourning and famine.

She will be consumed by fire,

for mighty is the Lord God who judges her.

Threefold Woe Over Babylon’s Fall

9 “When the kings of the earth who committed adultery with her and shared her luxury see the smoke of her burning, they will weep and mourn over her. 10 Terrified at her torment, they will stand far off and cry:

“‘Woe! Woe to you, great city,

you mighty city of Babylon!

In one hour your doom has come!’

11 “The merchants of the earth will weep and mourn over her because no one buys their cargoes anymore— 12 cargoes of gold, silver, precious stones and pearls; fine linen, purple, silk and scarlet cloth; every sort of citron wood, and articles of every kind made of ivory, costly wood, bronze, iron and marble; 13 cargoes of cinnamon and spice, of incense, myrrh and frankincense, of wine and olive oil, of fine flour and wheat; cattle and sheep; horses and carriages; and human beings sold as slaves.

14 “They will say, ‘The fruit you longed for is gone from you. All your luxury and splendor have vanished, never to be recovered.’ 15 The merchants who sold these things and gained their wealth from her will stand far off, terrified at her torment. They will weep and mourn 16 and cry out:

“‘Woe! Woe to you, great city,

dressed in fine linen, purple and scarlet,

and glittering with gold, precious stones and pearls!

17 In one hour such great wealth has been brought to ruin!’

“Every sea captain, and all who travel by ship, the sailors, and all who earn their living from the sea, will stand far off. 18 When they see the smoke of her burning, they will exclaim, ‘Was there ever a city like this great city?’ 19 They will throw dust on their heads, and with weeping and mourning cry out:

“‘Woe! Woe to you, great city,

where all who had ships on the sea

became rich through her wealth!

In one hour she has been brought to ruin!’

20 “Rejoice over her, you heavens!

Rejoice, you people of God!

Rejoice, apostles and prophets!

For God has judged her

with the judgment she imposed on you.”

The Finality of Babylon’s Doom

21 Then a mighty angel picked up a boulder the size of a large millstone and threw it into the sea, and said:

“With such violence

the great city of Babylon will be thrown down,

never to be found again.

22 The music of harpists and musicians, pipers and trumpeters,

will never be heard in you again.

No worker of any trade

will ever be found in you again.

The sound of a millstone

will never be heard in you again.

23 The light of a lamp

will never shine in you again.

The voice of bridegroom and bride

will never be heard in you again.

Your merchants were the world’s important people.

By your magic spell all the nations were led astray.

24 In her was found the blood of prophets and of God’s holy people,

of all who have been slaughtered on the earth.”

Ch.19:

Threefold Hallelujah Over Babylon’s Fall

19 After this I heard what sounded like the roar of a great multitude in heaven shouting:

“Hallelujah!

Salvation and glory and power belong to our God,

2 for true and just are his judgments.

He has condemned the great prostitute

who corrupted the earth by her adulteries.

He has avenged on her the blood of his servants.”

3 And again they shouted:

“Hallelujah!

The smoke from her goes up for ever and ever.”

4 The twenty-four elders and the four living creatures fell down and worshiped God, who was seated on the throne. And they cried:

“Amen, Hallelujah!”

5 Then a voice came from the throne, saying:

“Praise our God,

all you his servants,

you who fear him,

both great and small!”

6 Then I heard what sounded like a great multitude, like the roar of rushing waters and like loud peals of thunder, shouting:

“Hallelujah!

For our Lord God Almighty reigns.

7 Let us rejoice and be glad

and give him glory!

For the wedding of the Lamb has come,

and his bride has made herself ready.

8 Fine linen, bright and clean,

was given her to wear.”

(Fine linen stands for the righteous acts of God’s holy people.)

9 Then the angel said to me, “Write this: Blessed are those who are invited to the wedding supper of the Lamb!” And he added, “These are the true words of God.”

10 At this I fell at his feet to worship him. But he said to me, “Don’t do that! I am a fellow servant with you and with your brothers and sisters who hold to the testimony of Jesus. Worship God! For it is the Spirit of prophecy who bears testimony to Jesus.”

The Heavenly Warrior Defeats the Beast

11 I saw heaven standing open and there before me was a white horse, whose rider is called Faithful and True. With justice he judges and wages war. 12 His eyes are like blazing fire, and on his head are many crowns. He has a name written on him that no one knows but he himself. 13 He is dressed in a robe dipped in blood, and his name is the Word of God. 14 The armies of heaven were following him, riding on white horses and dressed in fine linen, white and clean. 15 Coming out of his mouth is a sharp sword with which to strike down the nations. “He will rule them with an iron scepter.”[a] He treads the winepress of the fury of the wrath of God Almighty. 16 On his robe and on his thigh he has this name written:

king of kings and lord of lords.

17 And I saw an angel standing in the sun, who cried in a loud voice to all the birds flying in midair, “Come, gather together for the great supper of God, 18 so that you may eat the flesh of kings, generals, and the mighty, of horses and their riders, and the flesh of all people, free and slave, great and small.”

19 Then I saw the beast and the kings of the earth and their armies gathered together to wage war against the rider on the horse and his army. 20 But the beast was captured, and with it the false prophet who had performed the signs on its behalf. With these signs he had deluded those who had received the mark of the beast and worshiped its image. The two of them were thrown alive into the fiery lake of burning sulfur. 21 The rest were killed with the sword coming out of the mouth of the rider on the horse, and all the birds gorged themselves on their flesh.

Ch.20:

The Thousand Years

20 And I saw an angel coming down out of heaven, having the key to the Abyss and holding in his hand a great chain. 2 He seized the dragon, that ancient serpent, who is the devil, or Satan, and bound him for a thousand years. 3 He threw him into the Abyss, and locked and sealed it over him, to keep him from deceiving the nations anymore until the thousand years were ended. After that, he must be set free for a short time.

4 I saw thrones on which were seated those who had been given authority to judge. And I saw the souls of those who had been beheaded because of their testimony about Jesus and because of the word of God. They[a] had not worshiped the beast or its image and had not received its mark on their foreheads or their hands. They came to life and reigned with Christ a thousand years. 5 (The rest of the dead did not come to life until the thousand years were ended.) This is the first resurrection. 6 Blessed and holy are those who share in the first resurrection. The second death has no power over them, but they will be priests of God and of Christ and will reign with him for a thousand years.

The Judgment of Satan

7 When the thousand years are over, Satan will be released from his prison 8 and will go out to deceive the nations in the four corners of the earth—Gog and Magog—and to gather them for battle. In number they are like the sand on the seashore. 9 They marched across the breadth of the earth and surrounded the camp of God’s people, the city he loves. But fire came down from heaven and devoured them. 10 And the devil, who deceived them, was thrown into the lake of burning sulfur, where the beast and the false prophet had been thrown. They will be tormented day and night for ever and ever.

The Judgment of the Dead

11 Then I saw a great white throne and him who was seated on it. The earth and the heavens fled from his presence, and there was no place for them. 12 And I saw the dead, great and small, standing before the throne, and books were opened. Another book was opened, which is the book of life. The dead were judged according to what they had done as recorded in the books. 13 The sea gave up the dead that were in it, and death and Hades gave up the dead that were in them, and each person was judged according to what they had done. 14 Then death and Hades were thrown into the lake of fire. The lake of fire is the second death. 15 Anyone whose name was not found written in the book of life was thrown into the lake of fire.

Ch.21:

A New Heaven and a New Earth

21 Then I saw “a new heaven and a new earth,”[a] for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea. 2 I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband. 3 And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Look! God’s dwelling place is now among the people, and he will dwell with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. 4 ‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’[b] or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.”

5 He who was seated on the throne said, “I am making everything new!” Then he said, “Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.”

6 He said to me: “It is done. I am the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End. To the thirsty I will give water without cost from the spring of the water of life. 7 Those who are victorious will inherit all this, and I will be their God and they will be my children. 8 But the cowardly, the unbelieving, the vile, the murderers, the sexually immoral, those who practice magic arts, the idolaters and all liars—they will be consigned to the fiery lake of burning sulfur. This is the second death.”

The New Jerusalem, the Bride of the Lamb

9 One of the seven angels who had the seven bowls full of the seven last plagues came and said to me, “Come, I will show you the bride, the wife of the Lamb.” 10 And he carried me away in the Spirit to a mountain great and high, and showed me the Holy City, Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God. 11 It shone with the glory of God, and its brilliance was like that of a very precious jewel, like a jasper, clear as crystal. 12 It had a great, high wall with twelve gates, and with twelve angels at the gates. On the gates were written the names of the twelve tribes of Israel. 13 There were three gates on the east, three on the north, three on the south and three on the west. 14 The wall of the city had twelve foundations, and on them were the names of the twelve apostles of the Lamb.

15 The angel who talked with me had a measuring rod of gold to measure the city, its gates and its walls. 16 The city was laid out like a square, as long as it was wide. He measured the city with the rod and found it to be 12,000 stadia[c] in length, and as wide and high as it is long. 17 The angel measured the wall using human measurement, and it was 144 cubits[d] thick.[e] 18 The wall was made of jasper, and the city of pure gold, as pure as glass. 19 The foundations of the city walls were decorated with every kind of precious stone. The first foundation was jasper, the second sapphire, the third agate, the fourth emerald, 20 the fifth onyx, the sixth ruby, the seventh chrysolite, the eighth beryl, the ninth topaz, the tenth turquoise, the eleventh jacinth, and the twelfth amethyst.[f] 21 The twelve gates were twelve pearls, each gate made of a single pearl. The great street of the city was of gold, as pure as transparent glass.

22 I did not see a temple in the city, because the Lord God Almighty and the Lamb are its temple. 23 The city does not need the sun or the moon to shine on it, for the glory of God gives it light, and the Lamb is its lamp. 24 The nations will walk by its light, and the kings of the earth will bring their splendor into it. 25 On no day will its gates ever be shut, for there will be no night there. 26 The glory and honor of the nations will be brought into it. 27 Nothing impure will ever enter it, nor will anyone who does what is shameful or deceitful, but only those whose names are written in the Lamb’s book of life.

Ch.22:

Eden Restored

Then the angel showed me the river of the water of life, as clear as crystal, flowing from the throne of God and of the Lamb 2 down the middle of the great street of the city. On each side of the river stood the tree of life, bearing twelve crops of fruit, yielding its fruit every month. And the leaves of the tree are for the healing of the nations. 3 No longer will there be any curse. The throne of God and of the Lamb will be in the city, and his servants will serve him. 4 They will see his face, and his name will be on their foreheads. 5 There will be no more night. They will not need the light of a lamp or the light of the sun, for the Lord God will give them light. And they will reign for ever and ever.

John and the Angel

6 The angel said to me, “These words are trustworthy and true. The Lord, the God who inspires the prophets, sent his angel to show his servants the things that must soon take place.”

7 “Look, I am coming soon! Blessed is the one who keeps the words of the prophecy written in this scroll.”

8 I, John, am the one who heard and saw these things. And when I had heard and seen them, I fell down to worship at the feet of the angel who had been showing them to me. 9 But he said to me, “Don’t do that! I am a fellow servant with you and with your fellow prophets and with all who keep the words of this scroll. Worship God!”

10 Then he told me, “Do not seal up the words of the prophecy of this scroll, because the time is near. 11 Let the one who does wrong continue to do wrong; let the vile person continue to be vile; let the one who does right continue to do right; and let the holy person continue to be holy.”

Epilogue: Invitation and Warning

12 “Look, I am coming soon! My reward is with me, and I will give to each person according to what they have done. 13 I am the Alpha and the Omega, the First and the Last, the Beginning and the End.

14 “Blessed are those who wash their robes, that they may have the right to the tree of life and may go through the gates into the city. 15 Outside are the dogs, those who practice magic arts, the sexually immoral, the murderers, the idolaters and everyone who loves and practices falsehood.

16 “I, Jesus, have sent my angel to give you[a] this testimony for the churches. I am the Root and the Offspring of David, and the bright Morning Star.”

17 The Spirit and the bride say, “Come!” And let the one who hears say, “Come!” Let the one who is thirsty come; and let the one who wishes take the free gift of the water of life.

18 I warn everyone who hears the words of the prophecy of this scroll: If anyone adds anything to them, God will add to that person the plagues described in this scroll. 19 And if anyone takes words away from this scroll of prophecy, God will take away from that person any share in the tree of life and in the Holy City, which are described in this scroll.

20 He who testifies to these things says, “Yes, I am coming soon.”

Amen. Come, Lord Jesus.

21 The grace of the Lord Jesus be with God’s people. Amen.

#revelation part three #bible stuff #revelation

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reylofanfictionanthology · 5 years ago

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Authors have now been revealed for For one is love and both are one in love!

Over 170 fics were posted to our Exchange this month and we are so excited to finally share the authors with you! Thank you so much to all of the writers who wrote for this event!

For one is love and both are one in love collection on AO3 | Gift Fic Master Post Part One | Gift Fic Master Post Part Two

Treats Masterpost:

Only Now Can We Remember by misszeldasayre for america_oreosandkitkats

Ben Solo arrives home, disgraced. All of Hanna City judges him—all but Rey.

just want the devil to hate me by walkingsaladshooter for america_oreosandkitkats

Three years after he killed the past, Kylo Ren returns to the town where he was only ever Ben Solo. Nothing is even remotely healed, but maybe he can start.

Each Day is Valentine's Day by HellyJellyBean for andabatae

Accidental Praise by QueenOfCarrotFlowers for andabatae

Ben likes his new roommate, Rey. She's smart and funny, and she's a good cook; she's fun to hang out with, although she seems to blush a lot. Maybe she's coming down with something? Anyway, when she has an interview and she needs some help selecting her outfit, Ben is there to help her out, any way he can.

She learned that word from Whom? by itsinthestars for aNerdObsessed

Rey and Ben Solo's young daughter, Reia Solo, says a bad word in front of them and now the couple wonder where she learned it... 👀

Her Inspiration by itsinthestars for Ann3onymous

Art student, Rey Johnson is preparing her Final Portfolio and her inspiration for it all is her boyfriend, Ben Solo.

Regeneration by crossingwinter for bitterbones

She should have known it wouldn’t work. Not wanting to tell her friends because she knew she’d have gotten a you can’t be friends with benefits with your ex talk should have told her all she needed to know.

Gentle Sin by QueenOfCarrotFlowers for CeciliaSheplin

Rey is writing a new song, maybe Ben can help.

As Boundless as the Sea by SpaceWaffleHouseTM for crossingwinter

Padmé survives and raises her kids, but decades later her grandson meets the granddaughter of the man who took everything from her at a masquerade, and sparks fly. Upon realizing who the other is, the two must make an impossible choice: risk losing the love of their families, or risk losing the possibility of loving each other.

Within and Without by misszeldasayre for CwenPhy

When Rey brings Ben back to Ajan Kloss after he saves her, Finn objects to his presence and burgeoning relationship with Rey. However, he can't ignore their friends who observe something real between Rey and Ben.

Strays by crossingwinter for dankobah

Rey rescues a mangy mutt from the site of a junkyard and brings the dog to the Solo Veterinarian Clinic. There she falls in love with the handsome son who's just really trying to save all animals.

The Gentleness That Comes by shewhospeakswiththunder for ilum

For the prompts: "1990s New York AU. Ben rejects his wealthy, reputable family (bonus points for !lawyer Leia) and decides to fend for himself. He ends up getting involved with an underground boxing community. One day, bloodied and bruised after a fight, he goes for a drink to the local bar he frequents. To his surprise, he finds a young, fresh-faced girl behind the bar instead of the usual bartender." And: "We have not touched the stars, nor are we forgiven, which brings us back to the hero’s shoulders and the gentleness that comes, not from the absence of violence, but despite the abundance of it." Richard Siken - "Snow and Dirty Rain."

Stay Safe by crossingwinter for itsinthestars

Just one curse. Just one simple curse and she’ll be gone. Blasted off the face of the earth. When had that idea become repellant to him?

prince and the sea by thewayofthetrashcompactor for kuresoto

Prince Ben Chewbacca Solo Organa, descendant of the house of Naberrie and the line of Skywalker, heir to the Starbird pirate fleet, has followed in the family tradition of slaying monsters and ruling the high seas. Which in no way is an attempt at ignoring his soulmate bond.

to be held, and held together by walkingsaladshooter for Lightningpelt

“I want to stay here with you,” he murmurs. “In this bed. And I want to make you feel nothing but good things.” — "After the war, Ben and Rey travel to Naboo for a vacation. The first thing Ben wants to do is spoil Rey as best he can.

Beneath The Stars by itsinthestars for MBlair

Rey and Ben celebrate their first Valentine's Day with snuggles, comfort, and kisses beneath the stars.

In the Name of Whitney, Mariah, and Aretha – Amen by reylogarbagechute for MBlair

A snapshot of happily-coupled NYC Ben and Rey via: one overblown Valentine’s Day fight, one dramatic rendition of karaoke, and one round of bang-and-make-up in a dive bar bathroom. Literary merit questionable, ridiculous crack-fluff guaranteed. A #RFFA fic.

False Positive by apisa_b for MissCoppelia

The health check Ben was given after he joined the Resistance didn't come back quite as clean as he expected, which causes Rey to feel rather guilty.

Tangentially MintyCel for ninecrimes

After Exegol Rey goes through a period of deep mourning, escaping to the crowded towns of Corellia where no one knows who she is whenever she needs some time by herself. But one day, a stranger walks into the dingy bar where Rey is drinking some of her sadness away, a stranger that seems all too familiar and is wearing Ben Solo's face.

Killing Me Softly by HellyJellyBean for PalenDrome

A short Mr and Mrs Smith Reylo AU treat. :-)

bittersweet and strange by thewayofthetrashcompactor for PalenDrome

Rey has decided that she's done with waiting. If she can't have a soulmate, she's going to be the best Jedi the galaxy has ever seen, and not even Luke Skywalker is going to stop her. She'll take on a mission to defeat a monster and prove that she's as good as any of his students, despite his warnings. Of course, monsters aren't always what we expect.

Conjugal Visit by radioactivesaltghoul for persimonne

Being the last Jedi comes with a lot of perks. For example, nobody questions Rey when she brings a bag full of equipment to come visit her accidental husband in prison.

This Connection by itsinthestars for persopilliankore

After one passionate night at an office party, Rey Johnson and Ben Solo, finally confront each other...

Unshakeable by crossingwinter for politicalmamaduck

Rey is performing in another fucking musical and Ben goes to see it.

Ash and Blood by CeciliaSheplin for queenofcarrotflowers

Bloodthirsty warrior Kylo Ren is betrayed by his men and must flee. He is helped by a mysterious woman and her friends. He joins forces with them to get his revenge.

In Secret, Between the Shadow and the Soul midwinterspring for RedPaladin465

Five years after defeating Palpatine, Emperor Kylo Ren and Empress Rey rule the galaxy.

If I Was A Raindrop (Would You Be My Thunderstorm) by itsnotillegal for ReyloBrit

Rey has finally worked up the courage to tell her best friend she likes him, but an awkward encounter complicates matters...

White Silk by TourmalineGreen for SaintHeretical

There is one person, however, in the office, who does not fill her with genuine joy. “Brides don’t want unembellished gowns, they want sparkles!” she’s yelling to the owner-designer-asshole who ruins her life and harshes her chill on a daily, and sometimes hourly basis. “Just last week, I had five brides who asked for more bling at a price point they—” “I don’t deal in ‘bling,’” Ben Solo is yelling back, behind his closed office door, but clearly loud enough that everyone can hear it. Everyone in the back office, thank God. Not the customers. She hopes. “I deal in couture,” he says. “I deal in design. I deal in elegance. Women want to feel elegant on their wedding day, not like a goddamn Vegas showgirl—” “Oh, oh, that’s rich, you, telling me what it is that women want?” Rey scoffs, almost laughs—she’s the only one brave or stupid enough to try this with him. “Wonderful. I am prepared to receive your insight, oh wise one.” — AKA the Say Yes to the Dress Omegaverse AU, for some reason?

Futile Devices by misszeldasayre for TheStolenQuill

When piano teacher Kylo Ren runs into Rey at his local music shop, he knows her talent must be cultivated. Who better to teach her than himself?

A Magical Surprise by itsinthestars for TheStolenQuill

Both in Ravenclaw House, best friends Rey and Ben Solo, share a moment of longing that turns into a magical surprise...

I'm the Spy by andabatae for thewayofthetrashcompactor (BriarLily)

Spy Rey is sent on a mission to figure out if Kylo Ren, tech mogul, is involved in leaking election secrets to a foreign government. She plans to seduce the information out of him. Too bad he seems completely oblivious to her advances.

Dibs by crossingwinter for tmwillson3

Ben dibses the parking spot after it snows. If he’s going to spend almost an hour shoveling his car out of the snow, he gets to park his car there later. Too bad one of his neighbors thinks dibsing is unethical and keeps thwarting his parking plans. Dibs: A Chicago Winter Parking Enemies To Lovers AU.

Syrup by walkingsaladshooter for trasharama

The first time she shows up, it’s eight o’clock in the morning and she looks asleep on her feet. Her brown hair is pulled back in a messy ponytail, her sweatshirt is sitting askew on her shoulders, and she blinks heavily up at the menu behind Ben’s head. He watches her purse her lips and immediately feels a soft fondness. “Small latte. Six pumps of vanilla.”

Lucky by BastetWrites for walkingsaladshooter

Nothing makes Ben more happy than waking up with Rey in his arms. Also lazy morning sex happens. _______________ A small gift for walkingsaladshooter for the Valentine's RFFA: Reylo Fanfiction Exchange of 2020

Endings and Beginnings by Vivien for Xochiquetzl

Rey’s hand cradles Ben’s head before it can hit the stone floor. He’s ridiculously heavy, all dead weight, and Rey’s entire body cramps in horror before she sees the faint rise and fall of his chest. He’s not dead. He hasn’t left her. Yet. She cradles his face with both hands and sobs in relief.

You can view the other two masterposts for this exchange in this tag.

#reylo #reylo fanfiction anthology #rffa writers #for one is both and both are one in love #master post #mod post #moodboard

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negandarylsatisfaction · 5 years ago

Text

[SUMMARY: Negan takes an interest in a Christian woman at his sanctuary who he makes curious about sex.]

Negan and Dinah.

“Ohhh...you’ve never touched yourself before have you?”

Smut.

It had been a week since you first arrived to this sanctuary. A group of ten of you were taken in and introduced to Negan, so far it wasn’t so bad. Besides the fact that you were surrounded by people that weren’t very much like you, you couldn’t really complain about what you knew so far. Negan seemed like a decent man to you, gave you all shelter and food and although he was intimidating...he didn’t seem all that bad.

For the past two nights outside your bedroom you could hear most of the adults together having drinks. Not being a drinker, you left yourself out of it but tonight you figured why the hell not? Being there with them didn’t mean you had to drink with them.

“Look who’s joining us.” Negan was in the middle of laugher with some of the men and women when he noticed you grab a chair by the table.

“Finally decided to come out of your little hole huh?” He teased as you smiled and pulled the shall you had around you close and sitting just a few feet away from him. Negan couldn’t help but take notice how modest your style was next to most of the women there. He thought it was nice being that most of the women there threw themselves at him only because they wanted something from him. Being the kind of man he was, he didn’t complain but it was still refreshing for him to see something different.

“You want one?” One of the men beside you leaned in offering you a beer. Not knowing Negan was watching, you shook your head politely and smiled.

“Come on, pretty lady. Don’t be afraid to have a drink with us now, we don’t bite.” Negan was slouched comfortably in his chair, beer in hand, everyone had a drink beside them.

“No it’s fine. I just don’t drink.” You adjusted yourself a bit uncomfortably in your seat feeling everyone’s eyes strangely on you.

“You don’t drink?” Negan sat up leaning forward facing you.

“How do you not drink?!” One of the girls who sat on Simons lap asked curiously.

“What else is there to do during times like this?” Yelled another.

“Fuck.” Simon muttered low making the group break out into laughter except for you.

“Well ok..” you whispered to yourself raising your brows with flushed cheeks. People speaking so vulgar about sex wasn’t something you were used to.

“Well shit, I can’t argue with you there.” Negan laughed before taking another sip of his beer.

Your hands on your knees, Negan noticed the slight squeeze you gave them with the corner of his eye.

“Alright alright, settle down assholes.” Negan spoke with a smirk as he looked over at you.

“I gotta say, Dinah..I respect that you don’t drink but excuse my French...I gotta ask, why the fuck not?”

“It’s not how I was raised. I came from a strict Christian family and there was just certain things they did not allow. And I just..I stuck with it.”

“Mmm..” Negan crossed one leg over the other leaning back as he listened to what you said.

A sudden silence made you look down awkwardly, you usually was not one to shy away about how you were but Negan was looking at you as if he was staring into your very soul.

“Well it’s getting late.” The men and women began to stand up throwing out their empty bottles of beer in a bag.

“Yeah tonight was fun. Hopefully we can all do this again this week-“

“As long as things run smoothly here. Then yes.” Negan interrupted looking over at the young man with almost a threatening glare that you quickly brushed off.

“Well, I better get going too. Nice little talk we had.” You sighed as you stood up and fixed your dress.

“Mind if I walk with you?”

Negan caught you off guard but you couldn’t say no. With a simple nod you gave him, he stood up with a grin taking a sudden interest at the modest young woman he had in his sanctuary.

“After you, sweetheart.” Negan moved aside allowing you to walk before him, giving the chance to do exactly what he wanted to do...letting his eyes wander on your backside.

You had not really spoken to him personally since you arrived, it was strange but you didn’t show him you felt strange. You stood straight, head held high and shoulders back.

“So you’re a Christian huh?”

“Mhm.”

“So you don’t sin?” Negan looked over at you curiously as the two of you slowly walked to your door.

“I’m not perfect but I try to follow what God would want me to do.”

“I would be a shitty Christian.”

You couldn’t help but laugh at his words, especially with the humor in his voice.

“Oh please, none of us are perfect. I’m sure you’re not all that bad.” Little did you know the dark hidden secrets Negan hid behind his charming smile.

Stopping at your door and turning to face Negan he looked down and noticed the golden necklace you had on. A cross lay right above your chest, something you always kept close to your heart. He didn’t say a word about it before looking up at you and squinting his eyes, leaning in close.

“I might get slapped for even mentioning this but I’ve never been one to shy away from conversation.” He smirked speaking low to you.

“You’ve never had a man have you?” His expression filled with excitement and curiosity all in one. He knew the answer to this. Your cheeks burned from embarrassment at his very upfront question.

“No.” You shook your head as you looked up at him through innocent eyes that sent a tingly sensation through him.

“How old are you, darling?”

“Twenty-four.” You licked your lips anxiously making it hard for him to not look at the soft pink full lips you had.

“Let me ask you something, sweetheart. You ever been curious to know what a man feels like?”

Was this man seriously trying to come on to you?

“Are you..are you asking me if I want to have sex?”

“Depends-“ he grinned looking down at your body.

“Do you want to?”

Never in your life had you even thought about having sex, it being such a taboo subject at home, never truly crossed your mind. You didn’t socialize much, didn’t learn about sex at all and well you grew used to the lifestyle. This was the first time it was presented as an offer to you, usually you would’ve said no without thinking, but something made you wonder for just a tiny second what it was like. The thought scared you and quickly, you shook your head.

“No..no I..I have to go to bed now. Goodnight.” You ran in closing the door in Negans face leaving him to stand there with a little laugh to himself.

“Ohh...women.” As he turned one of the women ran up to him walking away with him back to where he stayed but, as he walked away he couldn’t help but look back at your bedroom door.

Laying in bed, you stared up at the ceiling replaying over and over the question Negan asked you. Replaying the look in his eyes, the sound of his voice. Why the hell was it so hard to forget about? You didn’t understand the feeling you were getting about it, it was almost like a tingly sensation.

“Oh gosh..get over it Dinah.” You whispered to yourself before closing your eyes and falling to sleep.

The next morning you made your way to the kitchen as you always had been doing each morning. You sat down next to an older woman who was snickering and giggling with another woman beside her. Lost in your own world, you looked around the room before something she said caught your attention.

You heard his name.

Looking over with the corner of your eye and listening carefully you overheard her tell her friend about the amazing night she had with Negan. Rolling your eyes you shook your head but curiosity got the very best of you. Leaning in a little closer you heard things that only made your curiosity for Negan grow.

“God that man knows how to use that tongue of his.” She whispered making her friend laugh.

“He’s like an animal in bed..he just does what he wants..it’s so hot.” She quickly stood quiet when the main door opened and in walked Negan. The entire room stood quiet as it always did when he made himself present.

“Ladies.” He winked at the two girls beside you before looking over at you.

“Dinah.” His eyes stayed a little longer on you making the women beside you look your way.

“Good morning, Negan.” He grinned walking past you straight to the kitchen counter looking over at what the cook had prepared for everyone.

“Ok, eat Dinah.” You whispered to yourself before placing your hands together and closing your eyes to begin a prayer. Deep into your prayer you did not notice the sound of heavy boots stop beside you, you did not notice the silence around you.

“Amen.” You whispered as you opened your eyes and gasped at the sight of Negan staring down at you. His brows were furrowed but there was a smile on his lips, it almost as if he was impressed at what he saw.

“Amen.” He repeated low with a nod before walking out of the kitchen leaving more eyes on you. Not giving any mind to anyone around you, you looked down and took a bite out of your sandwich and enjoyed your meal.

After your meal you walked back into your room and grabbed a book you had found a couple months back. It was your third time reading it but being that it was a book about having faith during a time that you needed it most, you read it to comfort yourself. Sitting on the steps you began to read enjoying the nice breeze you felt not pay attention to anyone around you until you heard his voice. The voice of a man that for reasons you could not explain, made your heart skip a beat.

“Keeping the Faith.” Negan read off the book your held in your hands with amusement.

“Isn’t that something we all fucking need.” He chuckled as he sat down beside you. You looked over at him, observing him slowly from head to toe as he looked ahead at the kids playing. You wondered what his beliefs were.

“Do you believe in God?”

“Well shit, that’s something I haven’t been asked in a while.” The slight sound of laughter escaping his lips.

“I know there’s a God out there..I just don’t understand what the fuck he’s doing.”

“Fair enough.” You whispered.

“You should still try to talk to God.”

Negan chuckled shaking his head as he looked over at you.

“Darling, God stopped listening to me a long time ago.

“God listens to everyone.” You responded as he stood up.

“Yeah well, let’s just say I don’t think I’d get a pass into his little club. By the way we have a library here, I think you’ll like it.”

Negan walked off leaving you more curious as to what he meant. What had he done that was so horrible that made him think God wouldn’t accept him? Whatever it was, it didn’t take way the inappropriate thoughts that were beginning to take over.

As days went on you found Negan looking at you more often. His eyes on you always made you nervous, especially with certain things you couldn’t help yourself from thinking about. After overhearing that woman speaking about her night with Negan, you found yourself fantasizing more and more about him.

Fantasizing about sex.

It felt wrong but it also left you feeling so good.

Finally you got to checking out the small library he had set up at his sanctuary. A few chairs in the front with two set of rows of only books in the back, it looked like a legit library. An older man sat quietly flipping through a book as you made your way to the back. There was all kinds of books here, you didn’t know how you had not heard about this little spot sooner. There was romance, there was horror, there was religious books but one book that caught your eye was a small pink book with big gold letters.

“A woman’s guide to Orgasm.” You frowned, who found these books? You quickly put the book back down shaking your head but you couldn’t hold yourself for long. Looking around you and making sure you were alone in the back corner you opened the book to illustrations of a woman’s body. Skimming through a few words you went over what this book was about.

Masturbation.

Masturbation was something you never spoke about, something you never learned about, just the thought made your cheeks blush with no on around.

“Ahh, I see you’ve made yourself welcome to my little library.” Negans voice made you jump quickly hiding the book behind your back.

“Um yeah..it’s nice.” You smiled nervously.

“I like reading so I thought why the fuck not set up a little library or some shit. Not a lot to choose from but there’s something for everyone.”

You stayed silent fidgeting with the book behind your back, Negan tilted his head and scratched his chin getting closer.

“Mind if I take a look at what you chose?” He raised his eyebrows reaching out his hand but you stepped back.

“It’s nothing-“

“Don’t be shy now, sweetheart.” He stepped closer and reached behind you, without a fight you let him take hold of the book in your hands.

“Ohh.. Look. At. This.” Negan flashed his teeth as he flipped the book open then looked back up at you with a sarcastic glare.

“I don’t think God would like this very much, Dinah.” He teased, never in your life had you been so embarrassed.

“I was just-“

“Curious?” He snapped the book shut looking down at you. With your big hazel eyes you looked up at him and hesitantly nodded.

“Well shit, sweetheart. If you were curious, you could’ve just asked me. I know a thing or two about this.” He winked at you.

“I mean..I..um I just wanted to read for myself to see how um..-“

“Ohhh...you’ve never touched yourself before have you?” Not giving him a response was a response. A noise escaped his lips, a sound of pleasure, pleasure and excitement.

“Seeing a woman climax is one of the greatest things to ever be seen, especially when you’re the one who caused it.”

You didn’t have to say a word for Negan to know you wanted to know what it felt like to climax. Your body yearned for it and that’s when you felt the tip of Negans finger slide gently just under your bellybutton. The fabric of your dress thin enough for you to feel his touch. The soft sensation sent goosebumps through out your body, looking up at Negan you could see his eyes glimmer in the dim room making you that much more weak.

“You want more, don’t you?” He bit his bottom lip as you felt him begin to pull up your dress. Of course you wanted more. For weeks all you did was fantasize about this older man touching you and here he was...touching you.

“What if someone sees us?” You whispered leaning back again the corner wall as your heart began to race. Negan raised a brow looking behind him but no one was near by. Trusting him as he was the leader of this sanctuary you didn’t say a word, the frame of his body covered the two of you where no one would be able to see what was going on regardless. Never in your life did you think you’d ever be apart of something like this, but what was so wrong about it. You wanted to be touched.

Negans hand grabbed your bare thigh and lifted it up leaning your foot on one of the shelves beside you before you felt his hand brush over the soft fabric of your underwear.

“Mmmm...I’ve barely fucking touched you and I can feel how wet you are.”

Negan slid your underwear aside underestimating how wet you actually were and groaned against you as his finger slid down your slit. You gasped grabbing onto his leather jacket as he hissed.

“This all for me, darling?” He smirked before he slowly began to rub your clit. The feel wasn’t quite something you could explain but it felt good and you didn’t want him to stop. Closing your eyes you leaned your head back against the wall as your first soft moan escaped your lips. Quickly you covered your mouth but Negan shook his head beginning to lose his breath.

“No. I wanna hear it.” The moan of a woman who had never felt sexual pleasure was one that sent a rush through him. It wasn’t everyday he got to experience that. He could tell it was just beginning to build up in you. Moving his finger faster, he next did what you did not expect. Without warning he let one finger slip in you making you squeal but being so wet the discomfort did not last long.

“That’s right, sweetheart. Take it.”

Your eyes rolled back at the pleasure Negan was making you feel, the sensation making your hips jerk almost causing you to lose your balance. Negan held on to you and made sure not to stop his rhythm. The feeling was building up into something that felt like your body was on the verge of explosion.

“It feels like something..something is about to-“ you gasped as he grinned knowing exactly what was about to happen. The feeling building up so intensely you almost felt like you couldn’t take it.

“Negan!” You squealed as your body arched against his and you squeezed your eyes shut as a pleasure like no other rushed through out your body. Your lips parted but no sound came out, your body tensed up before you let out a moan releasing any energy you had into his arms.

“Oh my god..” Negan whispered as you stood still looking up at him breathless. After shock of the intense orgasm making your body spasm.

“That’s that look.” He muttered. It was almost a dazed look, a helpless look as he practically sucked all the energy out of your body.

“Oh..Dinah..” You noticed Negans arm jerking quickly but he no longer was touching you. That’s when you felt the sudden drops of warm liquid fall on your thigh as he moaned hoarsely. You looked down and gasped at his member throbbing in his hand as the thick white warmth continued to spill out of him. He leaned one hand on the wall right beside your head as he breathed low and finished jerking himself off before he caught his breath looking down. Still, barely able to move you couldn’t believe what you had just witnessed. Maybe the sight of a woman climaxing was the best thing for him but watching a man lose control of his body for just a few seconds and give in to pleasure..it was your new favorite thing.

“Open.” He whispered as he placed his fingers filled with his cum by your lips. You hesitantly opened your lips as he brushed his finger softly against your tongue making you taste him. The look of pure satisfaction as his juices disappeared into your mouth.

“Holy shit..” he stepped back taking a look at the mess he made on your thighs, your dressed almost slipping out of your grasp.

“Hold on.” He tapped his back pocket and pulled out a small rag. You watched as he wiped your thigh off before he looked back up at you and fixed himself up. You couldn’t believe what you had just allowed to happen. The feeling he made you feel, how could this be something that people were afraid to speak openly about? His eyes didn’t leave yours as he adjusted your dress and let it fall back down over your legs. What was there to say after something like this?

“Sorry for that-“ he pointed at your thigh as he scratched the hair on his face.

“Didn’t mean for that to happen but God that fucking face you put. Almost came in my god damn pants.” You licked your lips shyly looking up at him making him step closer.

“Maybe next time-“ he grabbed your face with both hands letting his thumb caress your lips.

“Next time I’ll put it right between these nice set of lips.” You opened your mouth as you felt him dip his thumb deeper before he abruptly turned away and took a deep breath.

“You’re gonna make me hard all over again, sweetheart.” You couldn’t help but smile, it was flattering making a man crave you.

“I’ll see you later on.” He spoke low as he kept his back to you and began to walk out until he stopped at the door way and walked his way back to you.

“I forgot one thing.”

You frowned with confusion when he suddenly grabbed your face and planted his lips on yours. You moaned as he kissed you deeply before pulling himself away with a smirk.

“Can’t finish a climax without a good kiss.”

He left you breathless against the wall wondering how you had gone so long not feeling this excitement before. Wondering when you would feel it again.

Authors note: As always if you’re interested in another part let me know and if you have any suggestions feel free to share away!

#jeffrey dean morgan #negan #the walking dead #negan x you #negan x reader #the walking dead fanfiction #twd imagines #negan fanfic

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xxisxxisxxis · 5 years ago

Text

Gateway Drug | Part Thirty-Nine

Table of Content or Part Thirty-Eight

Read here on wattpad

Word count: 4K

Warning(s): Explicit language, Drug abuse

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PMRC DEMANDS CENSORSHIP, DEVELOPES A LIST OF THE "FILTHY 15."

1. Prince, "Darling Nikki", flagged for sex/masturbation

2. Sheena Easton, "Sugar Walls", flagged for sex

3. Judas Priest, "Eat Me Alive", flagged for Sex/Violence

4. Vanity, "Strap On Robbie Baby", flagged for sex

5. Mötley Crüe, "Bastard", flagged for violence/language

6. AC/DC, "Let Me Put My Love Into You", flagged for sex

7. Twisted Sister, "We're Not Gonna Take It", flagged for violence

8. Madonna, "Dress You Up", flagged for sex

9. W.A.S.P., "Animal (Fuck Like a Beast)", flagged for sex/language/violence

10. Def Leppard, "High 'n' Dry (Saturday Night)", flagged for drug/alcohol use

11. Mercyful Fate, "Into the Coven", flagged for occult themes

12. Black Sabbath, "Trashed", flagged for drug/alcohol use

13. Mary Jane Girls, "In My House", flagged for sex

14. Venom, "Possessed", flagged for occult themes

15. Cyndi Lauper, "She Bop", flagged for sex/masturbation

Tipper freaking Gore, the wife of the senator at the time, Al Gore, and bunch of other political housewives got their panties in a twist in 1985 and decided to demand artists either censor themselves when creating music, leaving no room for even the slightest hint at sex, drugs, alcohol, satanism, occultism, violence, language, or anything else almost every artist uses one of to express themselves in their music.

When musicians across the board practically told Tipper, the other wives, and everyone else that called themselves a member of the Parents Music Resource Center, to go fuck themselves, they decided to slap censorship stickers on records that contained any of the mentioned offenses.

Even John Denver got hit with censorship for his song "Rocky Mountain High."

It didn't shock me when my mother was photographed with Tipper after attending one of the hearings.

Mötley was invited to a hearing to defend their content and speak their opinions with a handful of others being censored, but they never batted an eye when the news first came out because they knew having an "X" or "XX" or "XXX" rating for violence, language, sex, drugs, alcohol, etc. would only make kids buy the record more. And it did.

"It's bullshit." I state, tossing the news paper article aside.

"It's politics." Fred replies taking a bite of his bagel.

"These womens' sex lives must be atrocious or else they'd be spending more time on their husbands' dicks and less time on these people's." I motion to the article with the list on it.

"Babe--"

"If these polotical lunatics spent as much energy taking care of their own damn kids, as they're spending attempting to villainize artists who're expressing themselves, they would realize that it's not Mötley Crüe's or anyone else's job to raise their children. If you're so scared of your kids trying all this stuff, have a conversation with them about it and tell them about it, honestly, instead of relying on the music they listen to, to properly teach them about it. And at the end of the day, they're gonna buy the record whether their parents want them to or not, and they're going to try all kinds of stuff, no matter who talks to them about it, if they really want to try it." I continue my rant, Fred, Doc, Nikki, Vince, Tommy and Mick all looking at me, waiting for me to be done.

"Are you done, Sister Christian?" Vince asks me and I glare at him.

"Viv, it's publicity. Who gives a fuck?" Nikki asks me. "The kids are gonna go for the nastiest rated album anyway. The more 'X's the better."

"Yeah, but the audacity of--" Tommy's teaching his hand around my shoulder and covering my mouth before I can continue and I look at him where he's beside me.

"I've got a headache. I'm hungover, Viv. I love you, but I don't need to hear a Vivian Bitch Fit right now." Tommy explains to me.

I just look at him like he's lost his mind for shutting me up, and he cautiously moves his hand away.

I give him a ten second reprieve before shouting, at the top of my lungs:

"The audacity of these people pisses me off!" I finish what I was going to say and Tommy and Nikki are both jumping out of their seats a little at the sudden shouting, covering their ears, wincing, before Nikki's looking at me, sharply.

I roll my eyes at him and he grabs roughly at my thigh under the table, uncomfortably sinking the tips of his fingers into my flesh.

Ignoring him, I take a sip of my coffee, as he glances around and stands up.

"I gotta piss." He tells us, but I know why he's going to the bathroom.

I wait for him to disappear past the "Men's Room" sign in the Denny's before I get up and follow after him.

I walk in, catching the tail end of him snorting a line, and I cross my arms, waiting outside of the stall he's in.

I hear the familiar "click" of a needle being uncapped.

"Nikki. It's 10:00 in the morning." I tell him.

"Fuck off."

"Nikki."

"Fuck off."

"Nikk--"

"Fuck off."

"Make me."

I wait for him to come out of the stall and do what I dared him to, but I just hear the sound of him sighing out in relief as opiate hits his system, drowning out whatever argument we were about to get into.

When he didn't want to hear me complain or try to talk him out of stuff, he would run to his favorite room in his mind: his heroin den.

If we were at home, he'd lock himself in the closet, with me begging him to come out.

He'd open the door for me right before passing out so he could at least say he tried.

If we were in public or at a hotel, he'd lock himself in the bathroom and do the same thing.

The sound of vomit smattering the floor has me wincing as he mumbles "fuck it" and opens the stall door, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.

"Don't fuckin' give me that hit dog look." He tells me, moving past me to the sink, splashing some water on his face, smearing his already smeared eyeliner that makes him look like a raccoon that's been digging around in a dumpster.

"I'm not giving you any kind of look." I mumble, forcing him to look at me as I wet a paper towel and wipe his black-coated eyelids clean.

The smell of his vomit infiltrates my nostrils and I throw the paper towel away before pulling at his wrist to leave.

Being that he's perfected his magical potion, he isn't too jittery from the coke or nodding off from the heroin.

He's just quiet.

We leave Denny's and head straight to the airport to head back home, being they wrapped up the last show of the U.S. tour last night.

Next is Europe.

Once we land in L.A., Christmas music blares through the speakers of the airport and reminds me that it's already nearing the end of December.

Apparently Vince is reading my mind because he mumbles, "apparently time flies when you're in hell."

Amen, Vince. A-fucking-men.

The second Nikki and I get into the limo to take us to our house, he's busting out a vile of blow that's nearly empty.

"Fuck, I gotta get Jason over, asap." He tells himself and I rub my lips together.

"You know, we haven't even bought a Christmas tree since we've been married." I tell him, trying to distract myself from his previous comment.

"Yeah." He says, basically blowing me off and I reach the toe of my sneaker out and nudge him on the kneecap as he gets the tip of our house key and scoops some from the bindle, snorting a bump.

"Babe." I continue to tap his kneecap until he's got his hand around my ankle, loosely, stopping me.

"What, Viv?"

"What did I just say?" I ask him, crossing my arms.

He just blinks at me, smirking a little.

"I'll gladly tell you when I finish this." He holds the bindle up.

I lean forward and take it from him, holding it hostage when he attempts to take it.

"You'll get it back when I get a Christmas tree." I tell him, raising my brows.

"Are you fucking me right now?" He asks, chuckling, not thinking I'm serious.

"No...but now that you mention it, I want that, too. Then you can get it back." I add and he smirks.

By the time we get to a department store, get my clothes back on and his pants zipped back up, grab an artificial tree, lights and ornaments, and finally get to the house, it's nearly one in the morning.

"Okay, Saint Vivian, gimme my shit back." Nikki states, carrying the boxed up tree while I carry the bags of lights and ornaments.

"Put the tree up so I can decorate it and I will." I reply.

"That wasn't apart of the deal." He argues, his tone still light.

"Well now it is." I reply.

"That's cheating."

"I made the deal. I make the rules." I shrug.

"You're making me work for something that's already mine." His free hand pulls at my waist, turning me to him and I grin mischievously as he shakes his head a little. "That's it, Sixx." He tells me before crouching enough to wrap his arm around my thighs and throw me over his shoulder.

I laugh manically, partially out of fear that he'll drop me, but also because this is the Nikki I fell in love with.

Playful, lighthearted, aggravating but meaning well, Nikki.

He manages to dig his house key out again and unlock the door before stepping in and turning on the lights in the foyer.

"Baby, put the bags down for now." He tells me and I drop them as carefully as I can while he puts the box the tree is in, down.

He's walking us to the living room, laughing when he pretends to trip and I gasp, digging my nails into him like a cat holding onto its owner to avoid a bathtub full of water.

When he flips the next light on, he stops immediately.

My mind is in shambles for a moment as I try to put together why so many people are in my house once Nikki's nearly dropping me out of shock, not even hearing them all scream out, "surprise!"

Steven and Tansy are at the forefront of people as the explosion of glitter, a mixture of neon and pastel decor, an abundance of various alcohol options, scantily clad women, a handful of Nikki's friends he hangs out with outside of Mötley Crüe, and a big ass, two-tier cake with every curse word known to man written in pristine is cursive font on the sides of it is soaked in by mine and Nikki's eyes.

Steven's wearing a beer hat, smiling widely, while Tansy looks like a sallow Barbie doll, but she's still forcing out a grin for the sake of us, and everyone's waiting for mine and Nikki's reactions.

Nikki and I exchange looks, confused as ever.

"Why is it a surprise?" I finally ask, deciding it's best if I ask instead of Nikki, because all he wanted to do was come in, shoot up, have a few lines, fuck around with me some more, and pass out.

But instead he's being forced to socialize in his own house.

His safe place has been infested.

Steven and Tansy seem horrified that we don't understand the reason for the apparent party.

"...Because it's your birthday?" Tansy reminds me.

"And Nikki's was a couple weeks ago, but he wasn't here to celebrate it." Steven adds, his smile is long gone, his eyes focused on Nikki who looks like he could kill someone right now.

"Oh, right!" I pretend that I know that it's my birthday today, and everyone seems to let out a breath of relief. "It's been a long day." I explain, stepping to the two blondes, hugging them both tightly. "Thank you so much."

While everyone else starts going on with the party, music starting to blare throughout the house on the stereo speakers, cracking open beer, whiskey, and vodka, as girls strip down to bikinis to go swimming, Nikki's still standing at the door, the look on his face is a mixture or pissed off, disappointed, and "I need another dose."

"Babe." I say gently to grab his attention, hazel eyes looking to me as a jaw tightens. "C'mon, just for a couple hours."

"I'll be right back." He tells me, shoving through people to get to our bedroom.

I brush off his attitude the second I feel hands on my shoulders, squeezing them a little and I snap around to meet Duff's chest.

"Hey, birthday girl." He greets me cooly, and I'm hugging him before I can stop myself.

Something wet falls on my hand when I pull away, and just as I'm about to look around for whatever it was, his fingers that are sticking out of leather gloves that just cover his palms, are brushing at my face.

"What's up?" He asks me, furrowing his brows a little.

What is up? Why the hell are you crying?

"I-I'm happy." Is all I can say, chuckling, wiping more tears.

He knew it was bullshit. I was happy, sure. Happy to get the fuck off the road. Happy to get a break from Nikki and Tommy harassing Vince. Happy to get away from Doc's constant pressing for more tour dates to milk as much money as possible. Happy to be able to hangout with balls of optimism and sunshine like Duff and Steven and have Slash show me his pet snakes like he'd been meaning to, and for Izzy to tell me what music I should have been listening to, and for Axl to go on and on about Tansy but then completely deny he was interested in her because he was too much of a dork to just ask her out.

"I'll be right back, alright?" I tell Duff, looking around to see Nikki's nowhere to be seen.

"Okay." He tells me, swigging from a bottle of vodka.

I thread through people who tell me "happy birthday" and I thank each of them, genuinely, before opening up the bedroom door, and shutting it behind me, stepping to our bathroom.

"Baby?" I ask, seeing Nikki standing at the mirror, teasing his hair some more. "I had no idea they would do this." I tell him.

"I had no fucking idea it was even your birthday, apparently." He grumbles. "Shows how much I care, right? Husband of the year. Something else to be hung over my head anytime we get into a fight."

"Hey, I didn't even know it was my birthday. The guys didn't either. You've all been busy and working hard and tired. I'm not going to hold this over you, Nikki." I assure him, fixing a piece of his hair for him.

I didn't realize his pride was so hurt by the gesture Steven and Tansy made.

I found out later it was Duff who brought up the idea to Tansy, who recruited the Ken to her Barbie: Steven, to help her orchestrate it.

That was another indication to Nikki that he needed to slow down, forgetting his own wife's birthday, but he didn't listen to it a bit.

"I really don't want to do this shit, Vivian." He tells me, rubbing his eyes.

"And I do?"

"They're your friends." He sighs.

"What's mine is your's." I say as I kiss his cheek and he groans.

"You owe me." He tells me as I step out of the bathroom. "Matter of fact, I want my coke back."

"Um, I can't hear you, babe. I'm sure I will when these people leave." I tell him.

"Viv--"

"I-I think you're breaking up, I'll talk to you later." I keep going, walking to the bedroom door.

"I'll break something up when these people get the fuck outta my house!" He calls back and I shut the door behind me.

The night goes on as people play beer pong on the dining room table, dance on whatever and whoever they can, snort lines off any flat surface available, and chug whatever is in their cups, drowning pain and becoming oblivious.

I hate to break it to Nikki, but I don't want these people driving in their condition, so they'll have to stay here tonight or call cabs.

After a few hours, people are either pairing off or grouping off to go get laid, passed out, or too high to function properly and are just chilling out.

Steven's observing his work, drinking from his beer cans perched in his hat when I approach him, looking for Duff.

"Have you seen Duff?" I say over the music and he nods.

"Yeah, I think he's by the pool." He tells me.

"The pool?"

"Yep."

I furrow my brows, stepping to the French doors leading outside, seeing Duff and Tansy sitting down on the pool deck, talking

"Is he pissed?" She asks me, referring to Nikki, after I sit next to her.

"I would say go see for yourself but I don't want to toss you into the lion's den." I admit. "He hasn't come out all night."

"I'll go talk to him." She says. "If he's mean to me I'll just cry and make him feel bad like I do to Vince."

Duff and I exchange looks at her confident words before she's walking away in her neon pink bikini.

"Everyone calming down?" Duff asks in a slur, and I nod, glancing through the doors to look at the guests for a few seconds. "How does it feel to be twenty-two?" He adds, rubbing his nose and I raise my brows a little, glancing at the bottle of vodka he's been working on all night.

"It's weird." I mumble. "I was a senior in high school five years ago." The reality hits me and he raises his brows. "God, I'm old."

"You were seventeen your senior year?"

"In pre-k my teacher decided I was too smart for the class and vouched for me to be moved up to kindergarten, and it didn't take my kindergarten teacher long to convince the principle of the elementary school to let me start in the first grade since they hadn't really started in on their curriculum for the year." I explain.

"I couldn't even meet the basic requirements of alternative school." He tells me.

"You're a freaking genius, you just didn't apply yourself." I tell him and he shrugs.

"I had more important things to get done.

"I guess you did." I agree, gently scoring the bottle of alcohol away from him.

"I know you're tired of me saying this, but, Viv, you gotta get back to dancing."

"Yeah?" I ask.

"Yeah. I mean, imagine me giving up music for someone I'm in a relationship with so I can hold their hand or fucking babysit them or whatever. I mean, sure it shows I love them a lot, but it would just make who ever I was with look like a fucking bitch. And I've talked to Nikki before and he told me he didn't want you to quit dance and he wanted you to go to school." He explains. "Why didn't you?"

"I had more important things to get done." I repeat him.

"I don't know if you're selfless sometimes, or just not thinking." He says, before his face suddenly falls. "I sound like an asshole right now, I'm sorry." He apologizes and I shake my head.

"I'm not upset, I know what you mean." I assure him.

"Okay." He rubs his eyes again like a sleepy child.

"Do you need me to help you to bed?" I offer and he waves his hand at me a couple times.

"No, no, I got it." He assures me, standing up.

He nearly falls over.

"Yeah, I'm sure you do." I comment, helping him inside as he apologizes.

"I'm sorry I'm being out of hand right now, Viv, I don't get like this every night." He tells me as I open our guest bedroom and thank God nobody's in here, although it's obvious someone has been screwed to oblivion on the bed.

I just throw the blanket on the edge of the bed over the mattress and help him lay down.

"Thank you." He says as I pull his boots off and set them nice and neat on the floor at the foot of his bed.

"You're welcome." I reply, setting the garbage can beside him incase he needs it. "Goodnight."

I'm about to leave, but his hand gently grasps at my hand, stopping me.

"What is it?" I ask him.

"I'm really glad we met and we're friends, Viv." He tells me, grasping my hand in his like I'm going to walk out anyway and not listen to what he's got to say.

"I am, too, Duff." I say back, smiling a little. "Sleep tight, okay?"

"Yeah." He nods his head.

"Alright, goodnight."

I go to kiss him "goodnight" on the cheek, but my entire system and body locks up the second he misreads my intentions, and kisses me.

This sounds so counteractive to who I am now and what I stand for currently, and it was ignorant of me to think such a way back then, when so many people close to me were heavily affected, some of them even dying, by drugs and alcohol...but I use to wish I liked alcohol or drugs, or even felt drawn to them.

By '87 I'd had several miscarriages, my marriage was hanging by a thread after only being married for four years, I was having an identity crisis and my entire world was seeming to fall apart and it became routine to buy a bottle of vodka or whiskey, or pills, or blow and just stare at it--trying to convince myself to go for it--for an hour before pouring it out or flushing it.

The people around me, which by that point was mainly Duff and his band, started to pick up on this struggle I had. And although they knew I had to be in some kind of extreme pain to be considering reaching such lows, they carried an "if you don't laugh about it, you'll cry" method of pulling me out of such spells.

Anytime we would be hanging out and I'd opt to try something they were doing, they would call it the "Golden Question Game" because the "Golden Question" was always "is Vivian actually gonna do it this time?" and they wouldn't argue with me about it or try to stop me because they knew the answer would always be "no" even if I didn't think it would be.

I even made the reckless suggestion to try heroin, and got as far as Izzy getting it in the syringe for me, trying to explain to me how to shoot it, how to angle it, how to know I'd hit a vein, with Steven, Slash and Duff all waiting to see if I was that desperate for an escape.

Like everything else I would think about doing, I just sat on the floor next to Izzy and stared at the golden liquid in the syringe and thought, "who the fuck are you to get pissed and angry at Nikki and Tansy for their addiction to this shit, and how it's destroying them, and then turn around and do it yourself?"

I shot it into the air away from me, handed the empty syringe back Izzy, thanked him for letting me waste his time and dose of smack, went to the bathroom with Duff at my heels, and cried.

I never went through with any of it because I knew I would never, ever, come back from it.

I would've drank myself to death or drugged myself past the point of no return and would have ended up a statistic.

I just needed a new escape because my original high became a heroin addict, and December 23, 1985, had me realizing more about Duff than what I had noticed before: Vodka was a hell of a lot easier to be around than heroin.

#nikki sixx #vince neil #tommy lee #mötley crüe #the dirt #gateway drug

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