#ff turkey
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not-quite-there-myself ¡ 11 months ago
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GIFT GIVING
Various from Arcana Twilight, Food Fantasy, and Twisted Wonderland; featured in alphabetical order. Romantic/platonic is unspecified, characters may be mentioned multiple times.
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They give you something they think you'd like, or something that reminds them of you. Maybe it's in your favourite colour, maybe it's your favourite food. Whatever it is, it was out on a whim, totally unplanned, unexpected. They didn't care how much it cost that much; if it was something they could pay for and something they know you'd like, they're getting it for you! They really hope you like it.
Alpheratz, Arcturus, Bamboo Rice, Blue Cheese, Cater Diamond, Deuce Spade, Floyd Leech, Kalim Al Asim, Pollux, SoufflĂŠ, Sukiyaki, Sweet Tofu, Tempura
Their gift to you something that you might've been mentioning often. They play it off at first, saying how you've been so annoying about it for a couple of days and thought to buy it for you so you won't speak about it anymore. What they won't tell you is that they've secretly been hoping you don't get it; either because they've already prepared it for you and are waiting for the right moment to gift it, or because they ordered it online and it's taking a lot longer than expected to get it. Regardless, they tell you "it's no big deal" when you receive it. They might not say the same about the way your eyes light up while saying thank you. Your happiness is certainly a big deal to them.
Ace Trappola, Alpheratz, Boston Lobster, Leona Kingscholar, Salty Tofu, Turkey, Sebek Zigvolt
Their gift is something you casually spoke about once and never talked about it again; whether you were shy to express your want again or simply didn't think to mention it again didn't matter, as they had already decided to look for it and to surprise you with it later. They're successful, mostly because you likely forgot about ever mentioning it ever again. Did they read your mind? Or perhaps they've paid more attention to you and your wants than you realize.
Black Tea, Brownie, Cater Diamond, Jade Leech, Pekking Duck, Realgar Wine, Rook Hunt, Sirius, Vil Schoenheit, Jamil Viper, Vega
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zackstriker ¡ 2 months ago
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“What are you thinking about?” Phil asks, chlorine trailing down the brushstroke curve of his long, lean neck. Ivory and charming and all his, his, his.
Dan wants to say, every brutal thing I have ever wanted to do to you. The asthmatic ‘I Love You’s that keep getting caught deep in my lungs. How even under a full-toothed sun you are bright enough to chemically alter the cells of my skin. You sick form of radiation. You lovely sunburn of a man.
“If you were an animal figurine what animal would you be?” He says instead.
Read the rest: Here.
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jtl-fics ¡ 2 years ago
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Fluent Freshman - Part 12
PREVIOUS
If there was one thing no one would ever guess about FF it is that he unapologetically LOVES Black Friday.
You may be thinking. Ugh Black Friday. Everyone is so rude and tired. The deals aren’t even that good. It can turn into a blood sport at the drop of a hat over a toaster that is 15% off.
You are correct.
That is why FF loves it.
It is the one shopping day of the year where every single one of his instincts are correct, valid, and useful. He has pulled his gran out of the way of elbow drops, he has avoided the gaze of a woman in PINK sweat pants who was looking for someone to steal a blender from, and he knows without a doubt that the cashier hates him already so there’s no need to worry about whether or not they hate him.
It’s like a breath of fresh air!
Everyone is just as antagonistic and awful as he thinks they are!
Shopping is actually the blood sport he always feels like it is!
So there he is standing in a line at the nearest store (Target) waiting to be let in with the masses who all look ready to stab one another for better positioning for a TV. The jokes on them though because his only goal is the grocery section and he deals with the threat of repeated stabbings for BREAKFAST.
He spots an IHOP in the distance and hopes his gran doesn’t feel too lonely. They’ve gotten buttermilk stacks together at the IHOP by the mall for years after the two of them finished Christmas Shopping.
Someone elbows him in the side to get his spot in line but FF does not really care. Again, he doubts any of these people are going to be racing him to the all purpose flour.
It’s 4 AM and the barricades come down.
There’s a rush of people pushing and shoving but FF just steps to the side and watches as they all rush in. He’d mostly stayed in the line because the throng of people made it easier to stay warm. He had left his jacket back at the house because the five hour energy might be making his skin feel super sensitive but he is pretty sure that if he wore his nylon jacket he would die.
The five hour energy also may be upping his anxiety just a little bit.
He walks into the store at a leisurely pace and while the crowd fights over the carts he grabs one of the baskets. He can feel the eyes of other shoppers all wondering if he has some insider knowledge on a good deal that would only require the basket or if it’s a matter of who gets to the back to receive the ‘redeem’ coupon.
He sees a few shoppers get lured in by his siren call and much like a siren following anything that FF is about to do will undoubtedly lead to their downfall.
But FF doesn’t care about that.
He cares about HIS downfall.
So he makes his way to the grocery section and ignores the six different shopping assistants who try and guide him to where he ‘should’ be shopping and each of them only give him increasingly confused looks when he states his intention to go to the grocery section every single time.
Is it easier to ignore their stares when the five hour energy have set his baseline heart rate to something that might be too fast to register as a heartbeat? Maybe.
It is easier to ignore the confusion on their faces when he can see both the past (he asked for TWO favors from Andrew in one day how is he still alive???) and the future (still malleable at the moment apparently. There’s even a future where Andrew actually just is trying to make overtures of friendship but he dismisses that one as INCREDIBLY unlikely and looks at the far more viable one where Andrew at least makes his death quick while he enjoys his great gran’s brownies.)
It’s good to set reasonable goals for yourself.
So he arrives at the grocery section which is deserted aside from one employee who may or may not be asleep against a shelf. FF looks and….not a shelf he needs so he is not about to wake that poor man up.
So he gets everything he needs for his great gran’s brownies (he’s trying to buy his life here so he is not about to assume he can use ANYTHING in the house), the ingredients for a good breakfast (because he really needs to eat something that is not a five hour energy or sugar for the sake of his poor stomach and he may as well get enough for everyone), and (since Captain Neil mentioned it & he is trying to buy his life here) the ingredients to bake another pie.
While he grabs cinnamon he checks to see if they have grandma’s love in stock but, alas, it continues to be unavailable commercially.
He stares at the whipped cream for so long that the employee asleep in the other aisle woke up and asked if he needed help and, startled, he dropped it in his basket. “No I’m good.” He says before power walking out of the grocery department and deciding to brave the Home Goods section to buy some incense so that he can hopefully channel the spirit of his great gran to assist him in this, the darkest of his baking hours.
He arrives at the check out stations and finds the shortest line .
He can feel eyes on him, inspecting his purchases, judging them, judging him, who the fuck goes grocery shopping during the Black Friday rush?
FF.
FF goes grocery shopping during the Black Friday rush.
The cashier looks for hidden cameras but FF has no such thing accompanying him today or ever (as far as he knows.)
After a moment the cashier must look at the ever growing line and decide that whatever scheme they think FF is up to isn’t worth trying to figure out. They offer a membership card, FF valiantly declines to get one despite the two attempts.
He is out the door with four bags of groceries that all have a target on them that feels a little too correct. It’s 6 AM now (he really did lose a lot of time at the whipped cream section) and he’s walking back to the house in Columbia.
He actually feels a little bit better since he at least got to experience his actual favorite blood sport (sorry Exy) and he even got another 2 five hour energies while he was in the check out line so he could replace some of the ones that he had gone through.
“Smith?”
He would like to thank the combined weight of the groceries for keeping his feet on the ground when he heard Captain Neil’s voice.
He turns and Captain Neil is looking at him wide-eyed in his running gear that Smith has seen him in. “You were shopping??” He asks.
FF nods and lifts up the four bags as evidence. “Why didn’t you pick up your phone?” He asks.
FF almost scoffs but he doesn’t, “You can’t be distracted when you’re in a Target on Black Friday. That’s how you take an elbow to the eye.” He responds because it’s like Captain Neil has never experienced the WWE-like environment of Black Friday shopping.
Captain Neil blinks at him.
“Text Andrew or me next time you’re going to go off into the night or just let us know beforehand. Andrew would have driven you.” Captain Neil says and grabs two of the bags out of FF’s hand. “C’mon let’s get back and maybe you can get some sleep.” Captain Neil sighs.
“I’m fine.” FF adjusts the bags so he has one in each hand.
Captain Neil does not say anything so FF assumes that he has accepted that.
***
FF had not been asleep on the couch when Neil had walked through the living room. Neil, in a move that had Andrew fully waking up, went back to the room to check his phone to see if FF had texted him an update on going out. All that greets Neil is the impersonal series of texts that mostly confirmed when practice times had been changed, when the bus was leaving, and spelling on various Spanish words.
FF isn’t a big text person.
He’s more of an in-person kind of friend.
Neil likes that about him most of the time.
“What.” Andrew asks face still half buried in Neil’s pillow.
“Smith isn’t on the couch.”
That has Andrew getting up despite the early hour and their activities the night before. Neil watches as Andrew grabs his own phone to scroll through but seems to come up with the same lack of communication that Neil does.
Andrew does do the extra step and hit the call button.
But all he gets is the confirmation that the VM has not been configured that has greeted them every time FF misses their calls. (Voicemails make FF anxious so when he got his new phone he just…never configured it.)
Neil knew that FF was not pleased with them and somehow the calm request to either stop fooling around or let him out had hit him and Andrew harder than any of the screaming demands that the two of them were usually met with from Nicky, Kevin, Aaron, or any of the other Foxes.
“You said he wasn’t mad.” Neil says.
“He nodded.” Andrew confirms.
“Maybe he went on a walk?” Neil tries as they come out to the living room. They look at the front door and find that it’s locked but it looks like Aaron’s keys are gone. “He probably is going to come back if he took Aaron’s keys since Aaron wouldn’t be the one he’d be irritated with.” Neil rationalizes.
“He didn’t bring his jacket.” Andrew says looking at the black jacket still on the hook by the door.
“We can go and see if we spot him.” Neil offers.
Andrew nods and Neil heads out first since Andrew is still in his sleeping clothes and will need some time.
Neil had not expected to find FF walking back to the house with groceries for breakfast and the pie that Neil had mentioned hoping they could bake at the house.
“Is this for the pie?” He asks looking down at what was in the bags he was carrying as the walked back to the house. Neil managed to shoot off a quick text letting Andrew know that it was fine, FF just went grocery shopping.
FF just nods, “Got everything but Grandma’s love.” He says.
FF is a nice guy to brave the stores on a morning like this but FF also looks like he hasn’t slept a wink.
“Did you sleep at all last night?” Neil asks.
“I’m fine.” FF repeats.
Neil really is starting to understand his friends’ hatred for the phrase.
They get back to the house and Andrew is sat out in the living room. FF stops and blinks at the sight of him sitting there.
It is a well-known fact that Andrew does not willingly wake up early most days unless he has to. Neil is glad that Andrew has a friend that he’s coming to care about the way Andrew cares about FF.
Andrew gets up and yanks the bags out of FF’s hands. “Go to sleep. Today will be irritating if you’re half-asleep.” He says with a scowl and walks to the kitchen to put away the groceries FF had bought.
FF just looks at where Andrew had gone uncomprehendingly for a few moments and Neil figures he’s just tired. Neil feels guilty that him and Andrew messing around in the car like that had rendered FF unable to sleep and the two of them had agreed last night that from now on when FF is in the car they can talk all they want but hands stay on the wheel and eyes stay on the road.
FF is plopped down on the couch when Andrew and Neil come out of the kitchen after putting away the groceries (“These are the ingredients for brownies.” Andrew had noted as he put away melting chocolate.) and he’s looking through his flashcards again and not sleeping. He hears Andrew make a disgusted noise next to him and the next thing he knows Andrew is smacking the cards out of FF’s hands.
“Go. To. Sleep.” Andrew enunciates.
FF stares at him, then down at the flashcards. “I don’t think I can.” He says which is better than him lying and saying he wasn’t tired even if the truth had Andrew’s mouth stretch into a thin line that meant he was beating himself up for something.
“Try.” Andrew orders. “Just lay down and close your eyes. Nothing will happen to you while you’re sleeping.” He says.
FF blinks but nods turning on the couch and laying down. The blanket is still over on the lazy boy that Neil had set it on the night before and Andrew rolls his eyes before grabbing it and tossing it over FF.
“Thanks.” FF says before closing his eyes.
Neil looks to Andrew who nods and Neil accepts that there’s nothing else to be done for now and heads out on his run.
***
FF can admit that he’s a bit adrift in what Andrew and Captain Neil are doing right now.
He really should go grab another five hour energy because falling asleep IN FRONT of an irritated Andrew Minyard feels like a death sentence but “Nothing will happen to you while you’re sleeping.” And having a blanket thrown over him did not feel like a threat even if he can feel Andrew’s eyes watching him.
FF is tired and when he’s tired he tends to make stupid decisions. So FF lets himself drift off to sleep while the man who was likely going to move him to a secondary location sat and watched.
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His dreams are not peaceful.
He’s running, can’t escape, an echo of words he should have considered before letting himself drift off and he knows he’s going to DIE.
He wakes up with a start to the smell of bacon, eggs, and hashed browns with Nicky standing over him. “Hey there sleeping beauty! I made you a plate!” He says and hands FF a plate of breakfast that smiles up at him with a bacon mouth, egg eyes, and hashed brown hair.
FF takes the plate and digs in immediately. He needs his strength.
“Today will be irritating if you’re half-asleep.”
Andrew Minyard was going to hunt him for SPORT.
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NEXT
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As stated before if you’re up here and I spelled it right but you didn’t get a notification there might be something switched around in your settings that won’t let me tag you properly? (Cheesecookie whatever you did let me actually select you this time)
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pridewishes ¡ 8 months ago
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♔ || TURKEY ICONS
250x250 || demigender || bordered circle
like / rb + credit + read dni if using
requested by @theplxnetsystem !!
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jmkho ¡ 2 years ago
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✨️Joshy✨️
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asexual-levia-tan ¡ 4 months ago
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anyway this is who i think of when i think of sui khan
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umflowers ¡ 1 year ago
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.> googles 'healthy cheap one pot recipes' > 'here's 50 healthy recipes to make dinner super easy!' > every single recipe on every single site has 15+ ingredients, includes a sauce that requires standing over the stove, and is either served over pasta, has a heavy cream-based sauce, and/or substitutes a protein source for sweet potatoes APDFIAHPDF editing this to add one site has two (2) separate recipes for steamed green beans and microwaved green beans oh, okay, and then a recipe for chicken and dumplings. in what world is drop biscuits full of butter cooked in a stew thickened A Lot with a roux made from flour and butter healthy
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brokenbutunbowed ¡ 1 year ago
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Should I try and post more about my animals again. Hmmm. This has always been a very mixed blog but I've barely made an original post in a few years cause I just never feel like I have anything to say. Or the energy.
Coming up out of a few-month-long depressive episode and starting to feel joy about my hobbies again. Most of which revolve around my animals. I'm sure the depression will catch back up soon now that the sun is starting to disappear, but in the meantime... it's nice to feel a bit of excitement again.
I quit a very bad job back in March because I was pretty much one bad day away from killing myself. Like, I had plans. I was ready. My wife more or less forced me to quit for my own good. I had somehow saved up enough money to survive just fine without it and spent 6 weeks at home, catching up on projects, deep cleaning, and recovering. Then in May I got a job I thought I really wanted. I planned on staying long term. They said constantly I was doing a great job learning (it was a very hard job) but then did a 180 and fired me just before my 90 days, when I would've finally had health insurance.
Had a really bad breakdown over that, because at that point I didn't have money in savings and there was basically no jobs on indeed. I ended up having to go through a temp agency the next week to finally find a job. It's a boring factory job, but it pays the same as the hard job and it's so easy it crosses over into downright understimulating for parts of the day. I don't get benefits/ sick time/ holiday pay/ anything until I get actually signed on with the company, and I don't know when that will be, but I know I basically can't lose this job unless I skip work or come in late a bunch, which is not the kind of person I am, so I'm at least secure there. Now that I'm away from hard job and I've been at this job about a month, I'm actually glad I lost the other job. That job had so much pressure and stress and since I was the only girl in the department I was treated noticeably different (I believe that's half of why I was fired but I won't go there) but my current job is so simple. I spend at least half of every day marveling at the fact I'm getting paid to do such simple shit.
Anyway, yeah... hello adhd I was trying to talk about my animals.
We've been at this house 2.5 years now and finally starting to feel like the farm is getting to how we want it. We've got most of our birds pens up, except the breeding pen my wife wants to build for some of her chickens, but I finished the pheasant pens this spring that I started last year and the remodel of the duck/turkey pens.
We fenced in most of our property last year, and we finally got gates for the driveway last weekend so the horses and sheep can graze our yard and help keep the grass short.
When I was off work this spring I started working on deep cleaning the basement, where all my exotic animals stayed when our parasitic ex friends lived with us. The basement had a minor flood two years ago and still needs some remodeling and cleaning, but someday I plan to finish that and turn it *back* into an animal room. Though I plan to keep the tarantulas and geckos upstairs in their current room and set up all my snakes in the downstairs room. I have a crazy vision for that room that's gonna take time and money but I'm so excited to get there one day. I hate racks and I'm planning on pvc enclosures for all my snakes. It's gonna be expensive but I'm so fucking excited for it.
We're hoping to pay off the stupid PMI to drop our monthly house payment by the end of next year. And the escrow stuff was messed up by the township so our payment is currently 1700/month instead of the 1300 it was, and they refuse to change it even though it was a clerical error on their end, but hopefully we'll get at least some of that wasted money back next June when they reassess and our payment will go back down. 🤞 without that fuck up and the PMI, we could maybe get lucky and have, like, a 1000/month payment instead of 1700. That money would be so useful for other shit.
How did I get here. Where was I going with that. Hmm.
Oh yeah because money and animals lol
Anyway I don't know why I'm typing this and nobody is gonna read it anyway but maybe I'll actually try and post some animal pics soon.
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inner-space-oddity ¡ 1 year ago
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MY FUCKIN DIAPHRAGM ITCHES
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28dayslater ¡ 1 year ago
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Nomnombelly is an all timer slander name
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cyberspiderrrr ¡ 2 years ago
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just remembered I put a bunch of text replacement shortcuts on my grandma’s phone but she uses speech to text so it probably doesn’t work
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mental-mona ¡ 2 years ago
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forthelostones ¡ 1 year ago
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𝚙𝚝.𝚜𝚒𝚡 ; 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚎𝚢𝚎𝚜 𝚘𝚗𝚕𝚢 ─── ⋆
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⟡⋆˙୨ᥫ᭡. 𝚗𝚞𝚛𝚜𝚎 𝚊𝚞 - 𝚌𝚘𝚕𝚕𝚎𝚐𝚎!𝚊𝚋𝚋𝚢 𝚡 𝚏𝚎𝚖!𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛 ᥫ᭡.୧⋆˙⟡
synopsis: abby was a woman whose presence was becoming deeply irresistible to you. in your final year of nursing school, you toil with the idea of pursuing her — ruin what you have or enjoy what’s in front of you?
warnings. 18+ (mdni); sub!abby, domsub!abby, sexual themes, jealousy, spitting, strap-on, hate sex/makeup sex, nickname: dummy, and modern au - pre-established relation.
an: hi everyone, i appreciate you all sooo soo much. happy friday... it's getting real this entire ff is on ao3 as well x
(no y/n)
wc: 3.4k
Abby heard your door close, knowing it was time for you to leave for your flight. She froze as if you didn’t know she was in her living room listening to every move you made on the other side of the wall. Your footsteps traveled to be placed silently in front of her door and halted just as you knocked. “Abigail?” 
She concentrated on the purr of your voice vibrating against the wooden door. 
“Abby, I’m leaving, um, you probably are sleeping or — I don’t know, anyways, I left you some stuff so you could feel less alone while I’m gone. Um, it’s stuff I think you'd like. I know it’s not going to solve anything but let’s talk soon. Please.” 
You wait for the knob to turn, for the door to open and reveal the stubborn woman, anything, but it never happens. On the other side, Abby was standing with her hand on the door frame, absorbing your voice into her consciousness, missing you more than ever. She so badly wanted to open it and hold you, and assure you she was just being stupid, but she wasn’t ready for it. 
She waited a few minutes before opening the door to reveal a small tote bag heavy with glass. Abby wrapped her hand around the handle and peered out the door as if she would find you in the hallway, waiting for her. The bag was filled with an assortment of miss-match containers, housing different food items with post-its describing each one. Turkey, Mac and Cheese, Stuffing, Brussels sprouts, and Cranberry Sauce. She traced the delicate intricacies of your handwriting that she had seen many times before, but especially now seemed special. She removed the sticky paper and placed it on her dining table, placing the corresponding container above it.
In the following days Abby received every text message you sent her, she simply didn’t care to read them beyond the notification on her screen. Her anger boiled more and more, irritated at your persistence while simultaneously needing it as reassurance that you still care. 
abby, i’m sorry. let’s talk, call me please. 
hey, getting on the plane now so i can’t talk for the next two hours. 
just landed, i can call soon if that’s what you want.
all ready for bed. 
Attached was a photo she felt tempted to look at but didn’t. Her phone rang multiple times throughout the day with your name on the caller ID. She didn’t feel compelled to decline it, she let it ring until the ringtone stopped. She did exactly what she said she was going to do — study. She knew it was the one thing she could wholeheartedly commit to now. 
In the middle of studying her phone rang over five times and one notification for a voicemail appeared on the screen. She looked at your name on her phone, held a deep breath in her chest, and listened to a voice softened by tears. 
“Abby, hi. Just thinking about you and I know I’m the last person you want to hear from,” You paused. “I want us to talk. I just… I miss you.” 
Abby stopped the message and set her study materials aside, quickly pressing play again. “I miss you. I wish we were together right now. I’m going to make this right, I promise. Please, just give me some time.” 
Abby brought her fist up to her dripping nose and tightened her mouth into a thin line. The feelings that she had for you were inescapable. Her heart collapsed in her ribcage, smashing against the paper bones that felt like they were cracking as she dabbed the tears floating in her eyes. She went to all the unread messages and saw the photo of you lying in your childhood bedroom with an all-white long john set and a modest smile on your face. Your eyes were puffy, or was she imagining it? She wanted you to break apart like she was. Abby observed your grin, that revealed a more narrow sadness that she could place on her own mouth. 
We can talk when you return. 
You shuffle down the familiar hallway, bags in hand, trembling with uncertainty you quickly identified as a fear of losing Abby. Your flight left you disheveled and bubbled with anxiety, making you stop in the bathroom before calling an uber, and polishing yourself up. But no time in the bathroom could remove the dark circles under your eyes or take away the sadness you harbored.  You were fearful that if you waited a moment longer she’d forget about you — so you held your duffle and carry on, hastily knocking at a door that was once always unlocked for you. 
Abby pulled on the handle revealing her pristine appearance. Blonde hair tied into a braid, attached to the middle of her head, cascading down her spine. Her lips were moisturized, plush, pink, and waiting to be kissed. She clasped her hands in one another, arms bulging out of her black tank top clinging to her even skin. As a formality, she gestured for you to sit down as she took your bags effortlessly. After setting them down on the table she joined you on the couch, legs crossed in thick grey sweats. 
“I missed you.” You admit, inching closer to her. 
“I did too. I missed you too.” She said shyly, slightly shrugging. 
You walk your fingers to her knee and rest them there, embarrassed. 
“So, I’m sorry Abby—” 
“No, all of this is my fault. I was tipsy and out of line, I misconstrued your feelings for me. I shouldn’t have pressured you to just get rid of Ellie. Instead, I should have explained to you how much I really like you. And maybe my inexperience just made me want you even more… Like, I can’t do casual, or I mean I never had the opportunity to. I just… I wanted more with you — I want more with you. I don't wanna share you.” She ropes her pinky into yours. 
“My sweet Abby,” You sigh, cupping her jaw. “I should have paid more attention.” 
“I think I could have been more clear on what I wanted out of you, y’know out of us.” 
“I like you Abby and a part of me likes Ellie too. She’s fun and that was my appeal to her, knowing I didn’t have to get roped into something complex or serious. But I like you…so much, you’re all I could think about when I was away. I’m not used to anyone wanting me this way.” 
“I want you. I only want you.” She smiled. 
“You do?” 
“So much, I want you to be my girlfriend, seriously. Do you want that?” 
You freeze at the question, making Abby recede into herself briefly, face dropping into a premature frown.
“I don’t know how good of a girlfriend I could be to you. I don’t want to make you feel how I did that past week.” She leans closer and kisses the backside of your hand. 
“That’s inevitable, we will have times where things go the opposite of what we want, that’s okay but we need to be on the same page. Do you want this?” 
You feel a rock drop to the bottom of your stomach. 
“Abby I don’t know if I can fully say that I want that in this moment. Can I think about it?” 
“Of course you can.” 
She leaned in, using your thighs for leverage, resting her lips against yours. You melt into her sweet, strawberry-glazed lips, relishing her taste. Being away from her made a week feel like a year and you savored this kiss intending to remember it for later. Your hands come up to her neck and pull her in, pushing your tongue past her teeth and into her mouth, eliciting a moan. It was deep and from her core, exposing how much she missed you. She presses her hand on the back of the couch, the other one behind you on the arm, unfolding her legs and laying on top of you. She lifted her far leg so that it was hanging off the edge of the couch, crotch pressed against the top of your thigh, her body weight crushing you sweetly. 
Abby’s hand comes up the side of your ribs making you shutter. Her rough fingertips leave pale imprints on your warm skin. You lift your hips into her core and she moans into your left ear. A sweet blow of air and arousal fills your space causing the parting of your lips to replicate the pleasure. “I missed this.” Her raspy voice rang. 
You reach in the band of her sweats and brush her abdomen towards her clit. No panties. Her thighs were damp with sweat, her lips wet with slick and you wasted no time parting them. Abby wrapped a fistful of your hair into her hand and tugged, leaving your mouth agape from the sudden aggression. 
“Fuck me.” She demanded. 
You feel your pussy clench. Abby's change in demeanor put a bit of fear in you, knowing the woman was strong enough to have her way with you at any moment. 
“Come on. Fuck me.” 
Her hand unravels from your hair to your jaw to open your mouth. Her lips purse to expel a string of spit which you accept happily. Her lips were sloppy, smacking into yours as she stroked her clit against your fingers, hunching for more contact. You lifted her shirt up to reveal a light pink lace bralette, exposing her erect nipples. You bring your lips to the fabric, and she trembles. She removes the lace top and forces the stiff bud between your teeth, making her wince as you lean back, biting and stretching it. Her pussy left tacky, wet splotches in her pants.
“Let me get my strap.” She said, moving away quickly. You watch her firm ass switch from side to side while she marches to her bedroom. You sit up, mouth wet with desire, not hesitating to remove your bottoms.
The black harness houses a clear dildo that curved upwards, just how Abby liked it, reaching for her g-spot. She handed it over to you to strap on and laid back on the couch. Her eyes became hungry as she saw your perfect body displaying the new appendage. You walk towards her dripping with irrefutable sexual appeal before ripping off her bottoms and beginning to finger her pussy. 
“Don’t tease me. I’m already wet.” 
You climb on the couch, slipping the curved cock inside, splaying your body weight on top of her. Her skin blushed as she cupped the back of your ass, reaching to bring you closer. Her cunt filled the room with obscene sounds that made yours shake with anticipation.
“Please.” She repeated. 
“Please what?” You asked, catching her off guard amid moans.
“Make me cum.” 
Abby’s groomed fingernails dragged along the outer rim of your back. She started raising her hips and fucking against you, her grip became deadly, indicating she was close to cumming. Abby loved the sounds of your grunts in her ear, knowing the strap was bruising your clit, making you needy too. Abby’s eyes retreated into her skull but returned quickly to your sightline as you extract the cock from her cunt. The clear plastic became covered with opaque gloss, leaving Abby twitching and kneeling over. 
“Fuck you.” She laughed, short-winded. 
The strong woman laid on her stomach and began arching her back. Her smooth, florescent skin wrapped around each muscle beautifully. You rub her ass, starting from the midpoint of her back to the underside of her bottom. Abby whimpered at your gentleness only to be startled by an impulsive slap, instantly turning her pink. Your finger hovers over her lips, spreading them open like petals of a soft rose, examining how perfect her pussy is while it’s dripping.
“You really missed me huh?” 
“I did. I missed you sooo much.” She whined, completely transforming unsuspectingly submissive. You reach under her and thump her clit with your palm to which she yelps. She stretches like a kitten and curves her back even more. Another slap and she throws her head over the arm of the couch where she begins to reside at. 
Without warning you plunge your index and ring finger inside of her making your name spill out of her mouth. You curve your fingers to hook behind her pelvic bone, petting the sweet sponge inside of her. All you could think about was how she embarrassed you, ignored you until the last minute, and left your mind wondering. This motivated you to fuck her even harder, and you started to believe this is what Abby wanted all along. 
“I can—can’t take it, ple—” She struggled to form a coherent sentence. 
She reached her hand back to stop you from going any deeper. You snatched her thick wrist into your hand and pinned it onto her lower back. You positioned your leg on the cushion and slipped the dildo into her. Abby never felt so overwhelmed with pleasure. The constraints you put on her made her mentally weak, leaving her immobilized. The pain made her numb and left her humming uncontrollably. You weren’t even stroking her pussy but pounding it until the skin impacted by the strap transformed from peach to lilac. Abby’s mouth was wide open, gasping for air as a knot tied itself in her stomach. 
“Let—le— l—me, cum, I—”  
The blabbering woman stiffened as an orgasm came over her body. But that didn’t stop you from milking her cunt into overdrive. She hoisted herself up on the arm, but you refused to let her run away. Your hands came to her hips and brought her to her breaking point, again. Your name filled her cozy apartment like sweet music. You pull out, leaving her gaping and dripping, leaving a delicious view. Exhausted, you fall back on the other end of the couch. Abby rolls over, legs agape, head thrown back, chest rising and falling quickly. Her cunt was bright red and abused, just like she deserved. 
“Satisfied?” You spit. 
She lifts her head, hair disheveled, and smiles at you with a sinister grin. 
“I didn’t know I could cum that many times,” She admits. 
Her eyes darted to the cock still strapped on your hips, covered in her cum. She bent over and placed her head on your thigh, parallel to the dildo. You brush her messy hair out of her face just before she wraps her lips around it and sucks it clean. You didn’t know how attractive it could be to see her in this way, with her eyes locking into yours, moaning at her own actions, making your cunt wetter. 
“Let’s have a shower.” She offered. 
The water ran warm onto your neck and lower body as Abby’s tongue traced circles into your neck. Her wide hands wrapped around your wet waist, desperate for more of you. 
“I missed you even though…” She began to whisper. 
“Even though?” 
“You pissed me off, and made me emotional.” 
She pulls away from your ear and brushes the tip of her nose against your cheek with her tongue following shortly behind, melting into a kiss. 
“I know, you’re my needy, emotional girl.” 
You slick her drenched hair back and thumb her forehead. Her body comes forward to smash you against the cold tile with a thud. She slides her hand over your belly to your throbbing clit. “For a minute, I actually hated you. I wanted to rip you apart.” She groaned. 
“Here’s your opportunity, Abigail.” 
Abby wraps your leg around her waist to get a better angle. She hovers her lips over your mouth, teasing you as you close your eyes to lean in for a kiss. She giggles at how ridiculous you look. Then, she presses her teeth into your skin, followed by soothing kisses down to your breast. She puckers her lips around your areola, with her eyes gazing up at you, filled with fury. Just as she’s about to stick her tongue out, her fingers replace her mouth and tug on the puffy buds. You press your back deeper into the tiles as if you could sink into them. 
“Can I ask you something?” 
“Anything.” You wince while her fingers hold onto your pebbled nipples. 
“After you sent that photo, you touched yourself didn’t you?” She jerks your nipples. 
“Ah—ah, I— I did before I took it.” 
“What did you think of?” She asked. 
“You, I thought of you,” you replied. 
Her tongue slithered out of her mouth to flick your nipple. “Keep going.” 
“You… you were kissing me, all… over…” 
“Hmmm.” Her lips puckered and suctioned. 
“I just. I, Abby,” you moaned.
“If you stop, I stop.” 
“You were kissing me w—with my hands tied… tied up,” 
She moved to your other breast and sucked, causing your hole to clench around nothingness. 
“Abby, I imagined you fucking me until my legs went limp.” 
She smiled and brought herself back to your lips, kissing and biting them with no care. 
“Even at odds, I’m still on your mind.” 
She inserts her fingers into you slowly, stretching you out. You grip onto her shoulders for stability as she begins to pump in and out of you. She spreads her legs to ground herself and thrusts her fingers deeper inside of you, pounding the fat of your pussy, creating a slapping noise in rhythm with the beating shower. 
Abby bared her teeth as she increased her speed. She was grunting like she was in the gym doing a challenging set, mumbling words you were too sexually drunk to decipher. The water fizzled into a heavy steam, crashing into your wrinkled skin and creating a thick haze above your head. The humidity left you faint as Abby worked harder to make you cum with no comfort — all in her timing. Suddenly, she let go of the leg she had been hoisting up and wrapped her hand around your throat. Your moans became light and airy as you gasped for relief. 
“You’re mine. You know that right?” She declared. 
You nodded as you came up on the wave of sexual bliss. Your knees fell together, weakening as the woman continued to cockily spit at you, a side of her you never knew before. 
“I’m the only one who can fuck you like this. I don’t give a fuck, no one else will ever make you cum like this.” 
And that’s what you did, cum, with a deep primal groan accompanying it. She continued to stroke your pussy, until you caught your breath, just before she fell to her knees in the tub to lick up the mess she created. The curve in the bridge of her nose made a unique friction against your sensitive clit while her tongue slid up and down your folds. You turned the water off, and the both of you ran to the bedroom before the cool air caught up to you.
Abby dried her body and hair with a nearby towel and passed one to you. She flopped onto her mattress, with her head wet onto her jersey pillowcase awaiting your body. 
“Are you still mad at me?” You ask. 
“Nothing a little cuddling could fix. Come ‘ere.” She said. 
You straddled her waist to lay down on her soft, hot body and tucked your mouth into the crook of her neck. Abby placed her hand on the back of your neck and smoothed out your baby hairs there. She adjusted her body underneath you, unintentionally pressing her mound into yours, extracting a slight gasp from your throat. 
“You okay?” She asks. 
“Yes.” You mutter. She lifts upwards again, spreading your legs apart and exposing your clit. You look at her sly grin, she mimics you and spreads her legs open as well. You lay down onto her shoulder, breath hitting her neck, and buck your hips into her, your clit being tickled by the blonde’s low-trimmed pussy. You two perform a dance, following an unspoken choreography, pressing your cunts into each other. 
“I need you.” Abby moans. 
You guide Abby’s knees to her chest and turn so your ass is in her view, straddling her leg, spreading your slits open with your fingers, and placing your cunt onto hers — hot and needy. The wave of your ass brushing against her pussy made her mouth fall open in disbelief. Abby tucks her hands behind her head as she watches you use her pussy like a pillow and hump it freely just as she likes it. 
“Fuck, Abby.” 
Abby blushed at your words, watching your hips move like water, eyes closed and getting lost in the pleasure. 
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lordperceval-16 ¡ 9 months ago
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I Think There's Been a Glitch
Hey everyone, it's been a long time coming but finally posting the final part of my Lando SMAU! Hope you enjoy this as much as I enjoyed making it ❤️
Part 3 (Part 2, Part 1)
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Yourusername
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Yourusername In my heart there's a Christmas Tree Farm 🎄🤶
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Landonorris notice how you didn't include the burnt turkey pic
Yourusername it was NOT burnt it was golden brown stop inventing 🙄
Landornorris ladies and gentlemen of the jury, it was burnt.
Maxfewtrell wow @landonorris you never put bows on MY presents 😔🥲
Landonorris what have you ever done to deserve bows?
Y/N_Lando_Stan that comment implies Y/N HAS done something to deserve bows 👀🤭
Liked by danielriccardo, maxfewtrell
PapayaRose This reeks of couple's Christmas vibes but you're telling me they're NOT a couple? nah I don't buy what they're selling.
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Lando.jpg
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Lando.jpg Day 365 ➡️Day 1
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Yourusername aw they're the nicest pictures anyone's ever taken of me🥹🤍
Lando.jpg a photograph is only as beautiful as it's subject
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Ln4_lover the gasp I gusped 🤧🫠
PapayaArmy4 oh our boy is DONE being subtle about it
MclarenGirly The way they were at a party but every picture is focused on Y/N🥹 "It all comes down to the person you look for in a crowded room"
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PiastriPastries LANDO LIKED 👀👀👀👀 ladies and gentlemen he's shooting his shot (FINALLY JFC)
Yourusername and Landonorris
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Yourusername Alexa, play Glitch by Taylor Swift on Spotify🖤🤍
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Maxfewtrell About time really
Landonorris agreed tbh
Yourusername for once can't disagree with you
Maxverstappen1 little Lando's all grown up
Landonorris "little lando" there's 2 years between us ffs
Maxverstappen1 it's so heartwarming to see a young boy become a man
Carlossainz55 congrats you guys ❤️
Y/NsAngel omggggggg this is the best news ever
MclarenPapaya I cannot wait for all the podium kisses they will inevitably share 🥹
CarlandoGirl imagine being the 3rd wheel on that podium though
LandoStan Max gonna be there like 🧍‍♂️
Letsgolando you just know they're going to be disgustingly cute about it too like uughh I love them
@holy-macncheese-balls @theunwcnted @nous-aurons-toujours-paris-kid @akahalloween31 @mythunderstorm
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jtl-fics ¡ 2 years ago
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Fluent Freshman - Part 08
PREVIOUS
FF knows that it might be possible to get a new flight and that the excuse of “Oh I found a flight so I could go spend the holiday with my Gran” would probably be unassailable even tot he great unknown of Andrew Minyard’s displeasure (FF has not yet figured out when the pin will drop and Andrew will come at him. The man is a stone wall but FF knows that Andrew doesn’t like him and that knowledge is confirmed every time Andrew and Captain Neil come into Nicky’s dorm and find FF there hanging out with Nicky and he sees both Andrew and Captain Neil frown at him.)
It’s just that it takes 7-10 business days for him to build up the nerve to have to call someone and deal with customer service and it would take more bravery than he currently has to press forward and actually get a flight that would WORK. He has a very limited window for when he can get to Washington. HIs Gran had called a friend to borrow a car to pick him up and that was only available during a 6 hour window on his arrival date.
He COULD get a taxi to his Gran’s house but… (“What if I get kidnapped, what if I get trafficked, how do I tell a normal taxi from a taxi that will take me to a place where I’ll wake up in an ice bath and down a kidney, what if the taxi driver doesn’t like me, what if the taxi driver wants to talk, I don’t have anything interesting to say! What if he says mean things about me in his native language on the phone and I have to pretend that I don’t know what he’s SAYING?)… he’d probably die during the hour long ride from the anxiety.
He tells his Gran and she promises to get a pie out to him A.S.A.P.
It almost makes him feel better until he remembers what he had agreed to when Andrew came at him at his WEAKEST MOMENT to get him to agree to spend an entire four days at the house in Columbia he has HEARD stories about.
FF, laying face down on the floor in Nicky’s dorm as Nicky pats his back: Nicky next time you see me about to agree to something that will result in me getting killed I NEED you to run up and just punch me in the jaw. I’m begging you. You know I’m a disaster.
Nicky thinking about how Andrew has gotten weirdly protective of FF since the whole step brother incident: I need you to understand that that will result in ME being killed which I am not a big fan of.
FF misunderstanding: My grandma’s not THAT strong Nicky. At most grandmothers from across the country will frown disapprovingly at you.
Nicky thinking about all the little old ladies who dote on FF for inexplicable reasons and how some of them know he’s FF’s friend and give Nicky the grandma experience he had lacked growing up: Somehow that’s even worse than what I was thinking :(
***
Nicky coming to check on FF hours later: Are…are you watching the Saw movies?
FF taking copious notes: I need to prepare myself to survive Columbia. Do you have a basement or will Andrew be moving me to a secondary location?
Nicky walking over and shutting off the TV: I think it’s time to go to bed champ.
FF: If I don’t sleep then Andrew can’t drag me to a secondary location. I bought a 20 pack of five hour energy because that is the most the CVS would sell me.
Nicky: They cut you off??
FF: Yeah the manager there said he’d sell it as a ‘favor’ to a ‘loyal customer’ but to destroy my receipt and I had to buy in cash in case I die from a heart attack so it’s not linked to them. So if I play my cards right I have around 4 days of energy right here. I have looked up all the foods that can make you sleepy and will be avoiding them to stack the deck.
Nicky guiding FF towards his bedroom: Y’know that includes turkey. Also those five hour energy shots will be murder on your tummy. :(
FF: I am willing to make some sacrifices so I can live to see 19 Nicky. Also I figure I can just drink an entire bottle of Pepto per bottle of five hour energy resulting in a net neutral situation in my stomach.
Nicky tucking FF into bed carefully: Or result in you going to the hospital for an overdose get some sleep Smith. Andrew is not planning on killing you.
FF already falling asleep because his stress energy is running out: You have no idea how much he dislikes me and how much pepto my body can handle but you’re right about going to sleep. I’ll need my strength to power through the reverse bear trap let alone a laser collar.
***
2 of Grandma Smith’s apple pies arrive in the early afternoon of Thanksgiving via a little old lady turning up at Abby’s house who is a friend of a friend of a friend of a friend of a friend of a friend of Grandma Smith. The Foxes take a moment to marvel that somehow it is still warm despite apparently having been Granny expressed across the country despite the storm.
The delivering old lady pinches FF’s cheek and says not to be too disheartened and that his Grandma loves him and will see him for Christmas Break for SURE. She hands him a little note his Gran sent with the pies and he pointedly does not read it there.
This would make FF happy if he hadn’t been swearing up down left and right that he didn’t TALK to his grandma to Andrew whose eyes he can FEEL on him.
He manages a “THANKS.” In a perfectly normal tone. He has no memory that he already told Andrew and Captain Neil that he was spending the holiday with his grandma since he had blue screened at the offer last time and had rebooted in safe mode to power walk away from the situation.
“Your grandma is really nice.” Captain Neil says. “Those pies look good.”
FF, his anxiety momentarily overridden by a soul-deep love for his grandma, “My gran is the BEST and so are her pies.” And then he hears what he has said and walks back into Abby’s house to set out one pie for everyone else and goes and stress eats the second one on the living room couch after he promised Abby he’d clean up any mess.
He wonders if he’ll make it to Christmas Break as he sees Kevin Day staring at him in abject horror while Andrew stares straight at him.
Even with the attention on him he decides to check the note the other granny had given him from his Gran. It is in her native polish so he feels his shoulders relax since no one would be able to read it.
‘For my little Chicken, this isn’t your last meal like you texted me. I know you will be fine. I am thankful for you in my life every day.’
He tucks the note in his pocket and feels a little better.
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NEXT
Per your requests:
@i-have-three-feelings @blep-23 @dreamerking27 @andreilsmyreligion @belodensetdust @rainbowpineapplebottle @yarn-ace @iwouldlikesometea @lily-s-world @obscureshipsandchips @booklover242 @whataboutmyfries @sahturnos
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altocat ¡ 2 months ago
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Alto, as the leading (and my favorite) authority on FF Headcanons, how do you think the Main Boys would celebrate Thanksgiving.
One great thing about Halloween is knowing that Turkey Day is just around the corner!
Angeal: Cooks for the entire SOLDIER floor. Is probably sleep deprived because he made three different kinds of potatoes, two different kinds of meat PLUS vegetarian options, and has been hovering by the oven since 3AM. The guy's a wreck. But he's very grateful when the other soldiers make him drop what he's doing to give him a special toast in thanks. And he gets the choiciest cuts of meat, too. The boys all know how to show their appreciation!
Genesis: Squabbling with Sephiroth on the couch because Sephiroth was more interested in the stupid corny holiday specials instead of Gen's usual soaps. Geez, Seph. What are you, SEVEN? Genesis smugly insists that he's going to watch his figure this year, only to scarf down nearly four helpings. Afterwards, he lays facedown on the carpet moaning and whining, insisting that Angeal's cooking ruined his life.
Sephiroth: Watches holiday specials with Zack while simultaneously fending off Genesis when he tries to snatch the clicker. UNLIKE Genesis, Sephiroth can easily devour an entire table's worth of food without getting sick. He may or may not have stolen half the turkey. After he's done, he happily curls up on the couch to snooze, very comfortable and at home with his friends around him. He seems genuinely relaxed and happy.
Zack: Watches the National Dog Show religiously every year and drags Sephiroth into it, too. Angeal allowed him ONE (1) glass of wine because it's a holiday and he thinks Zack is mature enough to handle it. Cut to several hours later whereupon an extremely shit-faced Zack is hanging from the chandelier while a frantic Angeal tries to get him down. He's on dishes-duty once he sobers up. Angeal should have known better. Never again.
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