#fern maddie

[fernmaddie]

introduction

hey folks! i wanted to give a little introduction to myself and my work, as this is my first time presenting myself publicly on tumblr. this is going to make me sound rather professional, but i promise i'm just here to do the regular ol' tumblr things: be silly, gush about things i care about, and not take myself too seriously. i hope you'll join me. :)

i'm fern maddie (she/her), a queer experimental folk artist, multi-instrumentalist, and balladeer based on abenaki land. through folk balladry and original writing, i perform songs and stories exploring themes of grief, trauma, and renewal.

***please note: my approach to folk music is adaptive, interpretive, critical, queer-feminist, and inclusive. white supremacists, "folkish" nationalists, terfs, or anyone who engages with english-language folk literature as a tool of western cultural "purity" will be blocked***

buy my music on bandcamp

listen on spotify

watch some performance on youtube

more about my work below the cut....

past projects

ghost story - my debut album, released in 2022. ghost story was named the #2 best folk album of 2022 by the guardian, and one of the top roots albums of the year from npr music. across 10 tracks, it explores the stories we inherit from the dead -- both our personal dead and cultural dead -- through a queer-feminist lens. includes a critically-acclaimed interpretation of the ballad "hares on the mountain" (roud 329), as well as the ballads "the maid on the shore" (roud 181), "northlands" (roud 21) and a queer re-framing of the scottish shepherding song "ca' the yowes."

north branch river - my debut EP, released in 2020. across 6 sparse tracks and spry banjo-playing, it explores the intimacy and pain of our tenuous relationship with the natural world. includes a re-interpretation of the ballad "the elfin knight" (roud 12), and the original song "two women," inspired by selkie folklore.

of song and bone - of song and bone is a short-lived podcast i produced a few years ago. there are only 3 episodes out, but they illustrate some of my scholarship about folk balladry and my own relationship to balladry as a literary tradition. FYI: i would probably frame a few things differently if i were re-recording the podcast today (ideas and language evolve!). perennially thinking about making more, but we'll see.

currently in development

way to live - way to live is my second studio album, currently in production. as of this writing, way to live includes 8 tracks, and similar to my previous work, combines original songs with folk ballads, though with a greater share of personal storytelling than my earlier records.

said the false nurse - this is a piece of adaptive short fiction i'm currently developing. it's a deeply sinister queer re-telling of the horror ballad long lankin (roud 6), set in the 1620s in the north of England. stay tuned for process updates!

adult children - this is a full-length original novel and associated concept album i'm developing. it's set in contemporary rural vermont, and focuses on a group of adult siblings, their dying father, their failing farm, and the new arrival who threatens their co-dependent bond. the associated rock opera will be written in a folk-rock style with digressions into folktronica and country.

[thesilverhallwaysystem]

Listing from the least lonely to the loneliest alters that I’m aware of in the system:

Least lonely:

Maddie, the little of the system. Everyone takes care of him and loves him, he’s never alone.

Dorcas, he’s always with someone, either taking care of them or just being there for them, and he always gets to see his girlfriend.

Alex, he’s always around Maddie or Dorcas or Kaonashi.

Neither lonely nor not lonely:

Kaonashi, he doesn’t really mind either way, so he never really feels lonely.

Callus, in her words she’s too busy to feel lonely.

Marie, she sometimes feels lonely but she doesn’t mind that much.

Lonely whether they are or not.

NUV and her daughters. They live in the attic, rarely come out and are always lonely despite having each other; but push the rest of us away.

Loneliest of them all:

Fern, not always alone per se, but always feeling lonely and unable to fully connect to others. Sometimes forgotten by the others.

Zayn. Forgotten by others a lot of the time, except by Fern as they cohost and blend so much they’ve created their own little space in the manor. Isn't sure if he's in a relationship with Dorcas anymore despite being told he is. Can’t really see his boyfriend that much, sometimes feels like he doesn’t care about him at all anyway because he never really asks to see him, despite being told he's loved by him. Has the hardest time connecting to others and making his needs heard. Feels like a burden all the time. For this reason he usually just keeps to the rose garden, the little conservatory he's created with Fern, and the bay window.

Both him and Fern are the most depressed, showing most of the passive BPD traits, the most suicidal, the most prone to falling bad into autodestructive and unhealthy habits, and are the most vulnerable of the whole system, hence the most prone to getting abused. Yet they’re the ones who front the most. They are the loneliest alters and probably will remain like that forever.

Maddock/Prince Sandalwood is completely isolated from the rest of the system, but he doesn’t care, he just wants to live in his own world and is happy there.

[hardcandyfilmclub]

Fern the Human’s Madelyne Pryor arc

[alchemistc]

He likes occupying the same space as Tommy. It's - every time he looks across a room and sees him he just wants all the space between them to disappear. And - okay - yeah - Tommy has, like occupied space inside of Buck so there's - there's a little Pavlovian tic somewhere in the goo Tommy's smile can turn his brain into but also -

He likes the way it feels when they're side by side - naked or clothed - and Tommy arches his shoulder to smack it into Buck's. He likes the way his eyes dart, when they're breathing the same air and he's thinking about kissing Buck - which is a look he relishes now as much for the knowledge that he's about to be kissed as for the knowledge that he'd seen this look a half dozen times before they ever got to the kissing part. He likes the way Tommy occupies Buck's space - never overbearing but always close, close, close like if Buck asked they'd melt pieces of themselves and stick them together before everything cooled back down. He likes the way they can't quite hold hands without their arms brushing, and the way Tommy ducks his head when Buck exaggerates a flirty head tilt.

He likes a lot of things about Tommy.

He likes the way he grudgingly enters a gay bar because it's not really his scene and ends the night with a drag queens feather boa wrapped around his neck while he sings the Gaga parts of Shallow even if he gets a little pitchy.

He likes the way Tommy boops his nose, out of the blue while he's listening to Buck explain something that has no bearing on either one of them or the thing they're working towards together - still listening with rapt attention but also a little devastatingly charmed by Buck's rambles, of all things.

He likes the way his nose scrunches up when he laughs, soft and genuine, the way when he's really feeling it the ears draw back too.

He likes the way he sounds, that first time (and every time after) Buck found his prostate and he whined like a fucking siren.

He likes the way his face softens even when he's tired, worn around the edges as Buck flings a sock into his laundry basket and tucks his head up under Tommy's chin.

He hates the way Tommy shuts down every time Buck tries to bring up the future.

And it's not like - it's not like Buck isn't aware they'd sort of speed run some milestones. House keys swapped with the sort of flippancy you'd expect out of two guys whose schedules rarely lined up. A drawer in Bucks's loft for the clothes Tommy always left behind, because for some reason he liked to fling them over the balcony instead of stuff them back in his overnight bag. A toothbrush at Tommy's a month and a half in, which wouldn't be all that strange except for he'd gone out of his way to buy the same electric one Buck had in his bathroom vanity. The pin to each others phones, swapped and repeated until it was muscle memory and three weeks ago Buck had grabbed the wrong phone but he'd seen the lock screen of the two of them from their hike in Fern Dell and he'd punched the code in like it was rote before he'd even been fully awake.

Tommy'd hit a wall, though, the first time Buck brought up his lease. And it wasn't - Buck isn't always the best about understanding the shit going on in his own head, but he actually hadn't been going any particular direction there, it'd just been something to fill the lull that had popped in his head and -

Of course, when Tommy froze the fuck up Buck decided to poke at it like a particularly nasty yellowing bruise.

Kids - not his own, just the nebulous idea of them. (Tommy shifted to a conversation about cars so smoothly it'd taken Buck half an hour to notice.)

Marriage - not his own thoughts about it, just that Bobby and Athena had an anniversary coming up and man didn't it suck that Maddie and Chim never got the wedding they wanted and he'd gone to one once in Montana and it'd been in a barn and they'd had candles in Mason jars for their centerpieces before that was the thing to do. (Tommy booped his nose and scrunched his face and held out a ladle of tomato sauce for Buck to try and - son of a bitch he'd known it needed more acid and that Buck would get distracted with recipe talk.)

Homes - the idea of them. Tommy's century old ranch style rental and how it fit him, Bobby and Athena's hunt for a new home, how quiet Eddie's always felt without Chris there, and Tommy had spent an hour listing off all the things he'd fixed up for his landlady and the rent she'd been stubbornly stuffing back through his mail slot every time she found out exactly how much the labor alone for a full copper repipe cost.

So it's.

He's just.

He hates that he's about to do this, here, with his ankle hooked by Tommy's toes under the table at Micelli's when they're supposed to be enjoying six months but he's been on edge for weeks now and he's - God he wants this to work but if Tommy doesn't want to talk future then are they just gonna spend their whole lives stumbling into the next milestone? He doesn't want -

"I had something I wanted to ask -," Tommy starts, right as Buck opens his big mouth and blurts, "I want kids and that's kind of a deal breaker for me."

Tommy blinks.

Buck blinks back.

Not much better than Hot Chicks, as far as Buck is concerned. But Tommy's mouth quirks at the corners, and he jiggles his toes against the back of Buck's ankle, and -

Tommy blows out a breath. "Oh thank God."

"What?"

So he's -

Buck's confused.

"You've been fishing for months now and I thought you were..." Tommy grimaces. When he leans forward to reach for Buck's hand, his arms are tense and his fingers are clumsy. "I thought we'd gone too fast and you were throwing us in reverse and stepping on the gas."

"What," Buck says again, and rewinds.

Kids: where he'd tried to drop the bomb that there was one out in the world who already had half his genetic code and then blazed along to talk about how Chris was his favorite person in the world and Maddie had struggled with Jee and the whole foster debacle made him terrified of all the stress involved in state sanctioned parenthood.

Marriage: where he'd made some dumb joke about how many marriages ended in divorce and then reminded Tommy how much he hated the fact that weddings cost like a third of a years salary, and then told a horrendous anecdote about the way Eddie had asked Buck to come by one night after Shannon only to find him keyed up out back, with the fire pit going and Shannon's things still tucked into their plastic bag on a stool right next to it.

Home: where he'd told Tommy the house in Hershey was like a prison and he'd never felt more himself than wandering the continent trying to find himself and how the loft was suffocatingly open and of the two places where he always felt welcome, one had burned down and the other had been missing an occupant for so long it had felt sad and oppressive.

Foot in mouth Buckley.

"I brought up my lease and you looked like you were trying to figure out if you could hurdle three tables in one leap to get to the door."

Tommy groans. It's. Buck wants to be annoyed by it but he's charmed as ever.

"That - I did do that."

"So. I'm just. Tommy, I..." Because he's given himself time to think about it, since then, and he really doesn't want to re-up his lease but he's also not sure where to go from here.

"It wasn't what you're thinking, though," Tommy says, and there's a wry tilt to his grin. "Irene wants to sell me the house," he continues, and - there's got to be a point, here.

"Okay."

He likes that house. The lived in feel, the easy walk to a little public market where Buck can always find something healthy and Tommy can always come home with a growler of some new craft beer, the avocado tree in the yard and the renovations Tommy has spent half a decade on.

"When you brought it up I'd just spent two weeks trying to convince myself it was too early to ask you if you wanted to sign up for a mortgage with me."

Six months. A redo of their first embarrassing date. The wine, instead of pitchers of beer. I had something I wanted to ask -

"I want to be married, someday," Buck says, and Tommy's thumb skitters over his wrist. "And - the kid thing. That's still a deal breaker."

Tommy nods. Maybe not a surprise, but - still. That feels important.

"I still don't understand equity," Buck says, and Tommy. Tommy laughs.

"I can teach you," he says, and Buck swallows. He wants to call the waitress over, ask for too many canolli because Tommy's sweet tooth is a tyrant and Buck is still mystified by how he manages to always be so trim despite the amount of sugar he consumes.

Buck narrows his eyes. "How long a mortgage?"

He has a settlement from the city that's just been sitting around, mocking Buck for years. It'd make a good dent even with LA real estate. Tommy smiles. "Oh, 30 years, for sure, but we could refinance at least a few times."

"That's - a long time."

"Housing bubble might pop soon, and then we'd just be stuck in it."

"It's good we both have dependable government jobs."

Tommy's eyes crinkle, but his face gets serious after a moment. "Evan."

"Ask me."

Maddie's gonna fucking flip, Buck thinks. Eddie is definitely gonna give him a side eye. Bobby - Bobby will get it, probably.

Tommy hums. "You wanna share the tiramisu?" His grin is just this side of teasing, and Buck knocks a knee into his in retaliation. His eyes go soft and warm. "You wanna buy a house with me, Buckley?"

[cauliflowertree]

🌅🕊 <33

ily <3

send me an emoji!

[stylesloveclub]

sunshine (part 2)

In which Harry's a little bit nicer, and y/n is very excited to possibly, hopefully, maybe be kissed.

sunshine (part 1)

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Y/n’s apartment is filled with a bunch of people she doesn’t know. Maddie has a bunch of people over – not really a party, but a fairly large gathering. A few of her school friends, a couple of her co-workers…. nobody that y/n is really close with, though. 

That’s why she locked herself in her room, away from the music and the stuffy, smoke-filled air. She said her polite hello and everything, of course! But… she just wasn’t in the mood to hang out with Maddie’s friends. They weren’t really y/n’s type of people, and the smell of weed is giving her a terrible headache. 

She bunches up her hair in her fists as she stares at the math problem in front of her. She had been able to do integrals just fine with Harry, but when you add trig into the equation? She’s thoroughly fucked. Not even The Organic Chemistry Tutor could help her work through this problem. 

A knock on her door makes her jump. “Come in,” she says politely, though her brows are still furrowed grumpily as she stares at the calculus in front of her. 

“S’this room taken?” a deep voice murmurs. 

She whips her head around, heart fluttering excitedly in her chest. “Harry,” she says softly. “What are you doing here?”

“Maddie invited Blake,” he says, sitting down on her bed. “And Blake invited me.” 

Oh. She should’ve known. 

She rolls away from her desk and faces Harry, who’s making himself more than comfortable on her bed, laying down with his head on her pillow. “Smells like shit out there,” he grunts. 

“Yeah,” she shrugs. She’s accepted that her apartment will always reek of weed, no matter how hard she tries to get rid of the smell. “Did you smoke anything with them?” she asks. 

“No, not in the mood.” Honestly, the only reason he decided to come over with Blake was because he knew that he’d be able to go chill in y/n’s room. Hanging out in Maddie’s smelly apartment was the last thing he wanted to do on a Thursday night, but… he knew y/n would be there, sitting quietly in her room like the good girl she is. “Did you?”

“No.” She fiddles with her fingers. “I– I don’t smoke.”

He snorts. “You don’t smoke but you live with Maddie?” Maddie cannot survive two seconds without her vape. “That doesn’t make sense.” 

“The smell of it gives me a headache,” she tries to explain. 

“Your apartment literally always smells like weed,” he deadpans. 

She blinks. “Yeah…” she trails off quietly. “If I close my door though the smell isn’t that bad.”

Harry rolls his eyes. “What are you working on?” he asks, pointing to the textbook sitting on her desk.

“Um– math.” His lips quirk up, while she pouts. “S’not making sense again.”

“Lemme see,” he says, sitting up. She looks at him for a second, not moving, but when he nods towards her ipad again she scrambles to pick it up and sit next to him on the bed. 

“So, what were you going to try and do?” he asks, grabbing her pen. She’s hyper aware of how their thighs are touching, how she can practically feel the heat radiating off his body.

“Um… I feel like I need to use one of the trig rules here but I can’t think of any that would do anything here.” 

“Okay you’re right… the issue is that none of your sins or cosins fit any of the rules. But you can break cos^3x down into cos^2x times cosx, right?” 

“Okay…” she looks up at him like a lost puppy, still not fully getting it. 

“Do you have any trig identities with cos^2x?”

“Um…” she shuffles through her notes, “ cos^2x equals 1 minus sin^2x?”

He nods his head, “yeah. So now that everything is in terms of sin, you can do a u-sub.”

“Oh,” she blinks quietly, staring down at the paper. “Why’s it so easy when you explain it?” 

He shrugs, leaning back down onto her bed, “y’just need a lot of practice.”

The bottom of his shirt rises up as he puts his hands behind his head, revealing a pair of black ferns that point towards a yummy v-line. Y/n tries her best not to look, but she’s reminded of the night where she showed up to his apartment to pick up Maddie… how he’d been shirtless, his abdomen so chiseled and firm. The swallows on his collarbones, the butterfly that seemed to jump with every breath. She finds herself getting a bit short of breath as she thinks about all of the things hidden beneath his shirt currently.

That’s the thing about being a touch-deprived, romantic girl like y/n. The littlest things get her going. 

He was nice to her once, helped her with her math homework and comforted her when she cried, and now her heart flutters like crazy when she sees him. Just the smallest rise of Harry’s shirt has her spiraling. 

She can’t help but notice the way his biceps bulge subtly as he puts his hands behind his head, and finds herself overwhelmed with the fact that this boy – an attractive boy – was just laying in her bed casually.

She knows it’s no big deal for Harry, he’s probably just in here because the living room stinks and he needs to clear his head. But for her, it’s a lot. She never has boys in her room, has never had a romantic interaction with a boy. Hasn’t even been kissed. It’s always just very friendly – getting notes from a guy in her class, joking around with some of Maddie’s friends. She’s never had a boy talk to her any more than that. 

Harry, though… Harry comes into her room and talks to her even when there’s a whole party going on outside. He kept her company when she was stranded at his apartment, he took her home and took care of her when she was drunk and emotional. It probably meant nothing to him, but the way he grabbed her ankle and told her to lie down when he was helping her into bed was one of the most tender things she’s ever experienced. He put his hand on her waist, and held her arm while she stumbled, he’d guided her through the door with his hand on the small of her waist. 

And when he saw her crying at the library, he came over and talked to her. Comforted her and let her rant about her classes. He’d let her into his room and helped her with her homework, murmured soft praises to her when she got a question right, his arm brushing against hers, or his chest rubbing against her shoulder. 

The stupidest little things, that are probably so insignificant for him, have been on her mind for days.

“Hey,” Harry says, snapping her out of her daydreams. She tears her eyes away from his ferns embarrassedly, hoping he didn’t notice. “What are you thinkin’ about?”

She averts her eyes, looking down at her bedsheet. “Um, nothing.”

He quirks his brows. “Nothing?”

“Mhm,” she nods her head innocently.

‘Really?” he asks again, his lip twitching with the slightest hint of amusement, sitting up on his elbows now. He raises himself up so that they’re face to face. He’s not an idiot.

She bites her lip nervously, and her heart stops when Harry’s eyes flicker down to watch. He stares at her with a strange look in his eye… a glimmer in them that she’s only ever read about in books. His eyebrows furrow as though he’s deep in thought, eyes still glued to her lips. 

She wonders if she’s hallucinating when he leans in. 

She thought she was being silly for starting to feel things for him – that she was just being classic y/n, crushing on a guy even though she knows she’s too shy to ever make a move. Now, with how close he is, she can see every freckle on his tan skin, every lash that frames his bright green eyes. She breathes with a tight chest, swallowing thickly as her eyes flicker between his, wide and curious. His eyes still haven’t left her lips.

Her heart stutters as his large hand makes its way to her thigh, his palm warm and smooth, gently grazing her skin. He unconsciously inches closer and closer, incapable of pulling his eyes away from her mouth. 

He wets his bottom lip with his tongue, a force of habit, and finally looks her in the eye. His irises have turned a dark green, pupils dilated, and his breathing has deepened. She has no idea what’s going on in his head, but he looks serious. Deep in thought. His hand still rests on her thigh, the contact sending sparks of electricity all over her body, especially when his fingers gently start to trail upwards. 

Her eyes flutter shut as she tries to take deep, calm breaths, but he’s gotten so close that she can feel the puff of his breathing against her lips, inhaling his every exhale. It makes her lightheaded. He’s so close… so, so close…

A loud pounding on the door makes y/n jump away from him. 

Her eyes are blown out when she jerks them open, her heart pounding harshly with anticipation that’s been left unsatisfied. “Who is it?” she calls out with a shaky voice. 

Harry hasn’t moved an inch. He sits there and stares at her, hand still on her thigh. 

“Is Harry in there?” Maddie yells. “Blake is ready to go.”

He brings a hand up and tugs on her bottom lip with his thumb, then watches it bounce back into place, hypnotizing himself with the sight. Y/n, unable to get any words out, sits there and watches him as he stares at her lips.

“Hellooo?” Maddie obnoxiously yells again.

Harry’s nose flares and he shuts his eyes, frustratedly pulling himself away from y/n. She says nothing, still in a daze, watching as he leaves her bed. He stands and runs a hair through his messy curls, before heading towards the door and opening it. Maddie stands in front of the door with her fist raised, ready to knock on the door again. 

“Calm down,” he says, eyeing her coldly. Maddie rolls her eyes and walks away to tell Blake that she found Harry.

He turns around for a moment and glances at y/n. “See ya,” he says. 

She blinks, her hand coming up to touch her lips, searching for some confirmation that this was real and she hadn’t imagined it. “Bye,” she nearly whispers, breathless. 

The door shuts with a click and she finds herself alone with her thoughts. Her math homework sits abandoned on her bed, and will probably remain untouched for the rest of the night.

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Finally, y/n has Harry all to herself.

She’d been dancing around him all night, constantly catching his eye from across the room in a game of cat and mouse. He watched her from the corner of the room he was stationed in with his dark eyes, a teasing smirk on his face. He knew what she was doing – trying to distract him. It was working. 

He watched her as she mingled and talked, watched as she sipped on her drink, watched as she weaved her way through the passes of people in her apartment, pushing past the hot bodies and sweaty skin until she disappeared in her room. 

He followed her in, less than a minute later.

She hears him walk into the room, the sound of him turning the lock and his heavy footsteps approaching her. A shiver runs down her spine when his hands grab her shoulders from behind, goosebumps rising on her arms almost instantaneously. His firm front pushes against her back, toned stomach pressed against the curve of spine. 

His fingers are warm and gentle on her shoulders, comforting yet teasing at the same time. He doesn’t hold her firmly – his featherlight touch more tantalizing than any other form of contact. These light, delicate brushes of his skin keep her on her toes, never knowing what to expect next. She holds her breath as his fingers travel from her shoulders, down the length of her arms. 

Suddenly, she feels his lips against her ear. She can’t help the soft, aroused breath that leaves her as his lips skim the shell of her ear. He chuckles, low and taunting, and she can feel the deep reverberations of his chest against her back.

“I’ve been waiting f’this,” he murmurs softly. His warm breath tickles her ear, sending waves of pleasure straight down to her core, and his hands have migrated from her arms to her hips now. He grips them, fingers digging into the soft flesh there, and pulls her back, grinding her into his front. She swallows a whimper down, eyes fluttering shut. A hard bulge presses against her ass, and she can’t resist the urge to press back on it, wriggle her hips even though Harry’s holding her still. “You’ve been teasing me…” he presses a kiss right underneath her earlobe. “Playing all innocent when I know you’re actually filthy.” Another kiss, and another kiss, trailing his lips down the curve of her neck.

She lets out a pathetic, shaky whimper, and it makes him chuckle tauntingly. “Your head is just filled with dirty thoughts, isn’t it?” Her knees go weak as he wraps a hand around her throat, tilting her head to the side so that he can look at her. “Bet you’re just dying for me to fuck you.” 

Her eyes are wide and round, and her entire body turns into jelly. The only reason she’s standing right now is because Harry’s holding her up. She can’t get any words out, pathetically wrapped around his finger. She looks up at him with a pleading gaze, begging him to do something… anything…

The sound of her 8 AM alarm yanks her straight out of dreamland.

Her eyes are bleary as she frantically looks around her bed, gathering her bearings. She has to triple check that Harry isn’t anywhere in her room – looking at every corner and patting around her sheets as well – before she can confirm that it was all a dream. 

Oh gosh. This is like the third time this week! 

She doesn’t mean to be having these dreams. It's a rather embarrassing situation for her and she honest to god would much rather just read a couple of steamy romance books about fictional vampires to get the horniness out of her system, instead of having repeated wet dreams about a very real Harry. 

They make her feel icky because, like– isn’t it a bit disrespectful to be having such dirty thoughts about someone who’s just been helping her with her math homework and potentially also kissing her had they not been interrupted? Like what are the boundaries there? You can’t really ask someone for consent to having wet dreams about them… but it’s not like she was consenting to those dreams either! She can’t control what her subconscious mind decides to stir up for her nightly dream! 

She tries to logic it out – how would she feel if Harry was having wet dreams about her? Well… actually the thought of it makes her a little bit excited, cos that would mean he likes her, right? Ugh, no, she’s getting distracted!

It’s all very typical horny virgin behavior. Ever since her almost kiss with Harry, her mind has been in shambles. Her first issue is trying to wrap her head around the entire thing – had Harry actually wanted to kiss her? She hadn’t made that up, right? 

She’s replayed the night a hundred times in her head. Remembers exactly how his hand felt on her thigh, how he’d stared at her lips, how their eyes had fluttered shut, how their noses brushed… all the things she’s read about in her books! All the ingredients for a first kiss! 

How tragic that it’d been interrupted. She thinks that’s why her brain has been overly active this past week – her subconscious has been trying to fulfill the insatisfaction she felt when she jumped away from Harry, just seconds before their lips touched. It feels like she’s been edged over and over again and been denied an orgasm five times – but the orgasm is her first kiss and she’s being edged by Maddie, who stole that kiss away by knocking on her door! 

She flops around in her bed frustratedly, smushing her face into her pillow with a sad groan. What if Harry doesn’t wanna kiss her the next time he sees her? What if this was a one time opportunity? She doesn’t want to sound desperate… but she really wanted to kiss Harry! She’d be really sad if it was just a whim of the moment kinda thing. 

But also… if it wasn’t just a one time thing… if he did actually want to kiss her… well how was she gonna end up in the situation to be kissed by him again? 

She’s thinking about this way too hard, way too early in the morning. And she’s uncomfortably wet from her dream.

She needs to get herself sorted out. 

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The chair in front of y/n screeches loudly as it’s pulled from under the table she’s sitting at. She jumps at the sound of it, having been too engrossed in her book to be aware of what’s going on around her. When she looks up, she finds Harry standing at her tiny table in the campus coffee shop.

“Can I sit here?” he asks, his jaw tight. He’s wearing a gray Kendrick Lamar hoodie with the words DAMN. written in bold font across the front, his curly hair messily hidden underneath. All the other tables in the shop were taken (it tends to get pretty busy at noonish when everyone needs somewhere to sit and study), and Harry needs somewhere to sit before his next lecture.

She nods, eyes wide like a baby sheep. It’s quite jarring to just randomly see the guy you’ve been having sexy dreams about – especially for someone like y/n who apparently can’t be normal about having a crush or having an almost first kiss. She hopes she’s acting normal enough to not raise any suspicion. 

Trying to not get distracted by his green eyes and pretty pink lips, y/n looks down at the table, but finds herself instead staring at Harry’s hands. He has nice hands, she thinks to herself. The cross tattoo on his left hand compliments his tan skin nicely, and he has these thick knuckles that she just wants to run her fingers over. In one of his hands he holds a coffee cup, and even though she and him both got a medium sized coffee, his drink looks smaller, dwarfed in his massive hands. His thumb is fingering the lid of his drink mindlessly, and she remembers how that same thumb had touched her lips just over a week ago… how he’d tugged on her bottom lip and hypnotized himself with the sight of it bouncing back into place. And while she’s on that train of thought, she can’t help but remember how his hands portrayed such a significant role in her dream last night. Hadn’t she imagined them being wrapped around her throat–?

Harry clears his throat. Y/n glows with heat. She has absolutely no capability of being normal around him. “Sorry, what?” She hadn’t heard a word he’d said in the past minute, too caught up in her own thoughts. 

He smirks. Is she always this distracted? “Just asked how it’s going.”

“Oh! Oh, yeah– good, I’m good,” she closes the book, folding the corner of the page she’s on as a bookmark. “How about you?”

He shrugs. “Just got out of class. Needed a coffee.”

“What’d you get?”

“Just a black coffee.”

She can’t stop herself from wrinkling her nose, “Ew.” 

 He quirks a brow, “Well what’d you get?” “Vanilla latte with oat milk.” Yeah. She would be an oat milk girl.

Considering their recent frequency in seeing each other and his newfound… fondness towards her, he doesn’t find it difficult to start picking and prodding at her, getting to know her. He realizes Blake was right – she wasn’t a super duper shy girl, she probably had just been scared of him. Once he started talking to her and smiling every once in a while, it seems like she loosened up. What used to be painfully awkward conversations have now become free flowing and casual.

He picks up the book she was reading and reads the cover. “Book Lovers by Emily Henry. Awfully fitting for you.”

She furrows her brow, already offended. She hates it when people make fun of her books – especially boys who make fun of her for reading romance. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You’re a book lover, aren’t you? Can never find you without your nose in a book.” 

She relaxes. “Oh… yeah,” a soft chuckle escapes her. “Yeah, I guess I’m a book lover.”

“You think I’d like this one?” he asks, flipping through the first few pages. 

“Um… maybe.” She can’t imagine Harry being a huge fan of her soft romance books. “Are you a reader?”

“God, no,” he puts the book down. “Not smart enough for that.”

Her jaw drops. “You are totally smart, Harry! Way smarter than me!” she exclaims.

“M’just good at math,” he shrugs, “You’re little miss smartie, with your color coded notes. Reading your books for fun.” 

She grows shy. Part of her thought that Harry thought she was stupid – not the over-emotional-girl-who-cries-too-much kind of stupid, but rather the kind of stupid that makes you wonder how she even got into this school because she’s doing so bad in math. 

It was a massive hit to her girlboss mentality when she had to ask Harry for help, and even though Harry never actually made her feel dumb when answering her questions… she just had this mean voice in the back of her head that constantly nagged her, convincing her that Harry thought she was a stupid girl who should just give up and drop out. And ignoring that voice is really hard, so…  it was just nice to hear that he didn’t think she was a stupid little baby. It made that mean voice in her head shut up. 

“Um… by the way. My next calc midterm is next Friday. I was wondering if, um…” she tucks her hair behind her ear nervously. 

He fills in the rest for her. “Do you want to revise together this weekend?” 

“If it’s not too much trouble,” she says bashfully. “Your tutoring is super helpful.” 

“You can come over on Saturday,” he sips on his coffee. “No trouble.”

˙· .° ｡  ˚ ｡  ° . · ˚ ˙ · . ° ｡ ˚ ｡  ° . · ˙ · .° ｡ ˚ ｡ °.  · ˙ ‧̍̊  

“Is this right?” Y/n shows her work to Harry, and he nods. They’re both on his bed, except Harry’s lying down with his head on a pillow, scrolling through tiktok, while y/n’s hunched over her ipad. She’s been doing practice problems for the past three hours, asking Harry for help every once in a while. That's how it’s been most of the night – her study session is mostly just him checking her work to make sure she’s not doing anything funky and giving her hints if she’s stuck. 

She’s studied a lot in the past two weeks and luckily doesn’t need Harry to be guiding her through every problem, which makes her really happy. And she’s only gotten a couple of the practice problems wrong! Some of them were particularly tricky and had her stumped, but that’s why she has Harry. He helped her out of roadblocks and kept her motivated. Without him here, she probably would’ve given up after the first question that she didn’t know how to solve.

“You should take a break,” he says.

She’d refused to take any breaks since she got here – determined to finish the practice test that her professor had posted while she had Harry next to her to help. Now that she finished all the problems, she locks her ipad and puts it on Harry’s bedside table. She leans back on one of Harry’s pillows and copies Harry, holding her phone above her face. Except instead of scrolling through tiktok, she opens up her kindle app and starts reading.

He sees the tiny font on her screen from the corner of his eye. “Reading?” he asks.

“Mhm,” she shuffles around on his bed, getting comfortable. 

He thinks it’s kind of cute that she’s always reading. “Is it the same one as last time? Book Lovers?”

“No, I finished that one yesterday! This is by the same author though. S’called Beach Read.”

“What’s it about?” he turns off his own phone and sits up, turning to look down at y/n. Her hair is splayed across his pillows, and her eyes glimmer softly in his bedroom lighting.

She feels a little shy describing one of her favorite books to Harry – she’s often been ridiculed by her friends for being so lovey dovey and reading her silly romance books. But he seemed genuine when he asked. “Um– there are these two writers. The girl writes romance and the guy writes like these serious fiction books. And they’re kinda rivals.” 

He hums. “Let me read a little bit,” he looks down at the screen of her phone. “I tightened my thighs around the sides of his body–” he reads aloud, before she yanks her phone out of his sight.

“No!” she yelps, turning her phone off and practically throwing it across the room. “You are not allowed to read it!” 

He laughs, a fully amused belly laugh, and the sound is beautiful but she doesn’t allow herself to revel in it due to her embarrassment. “What are you reading?” he giggles.

“Oh my gosh,” she hides her face in her hands. 

“Didn’t expect you to be reading such dirty stories,” he teases, “I thought you were a good girl.”

“It’s not all dirty!” she defends herself. “It’s– it’s sweet! It’s a love story… it’s romantic.” Her voice gets quiet near the end. 

Harry’s laughter bubbles down and he’s left with a smirk on his face, while y/n lays in front of him, an embarrassed pout on her face. “M’only teasing,” he says as he reaches a hand out to rest on her thigh, not wanting her to look so sad. “Read whatever you want. Seems like a cute book, maybe I should pick it up, hm?” 

Her mind goes a little blank when his hand meets her thigh, his palm warming her skin once more – just like that night he’d almost kissed her. “Y-yeah, you might like it,” she clears her throat. “S’one of my favorites.”

That same look glazes over Harry’s eyes – that dark look, as if he’s deep in thought. 

She swallows thickly. Could this be it? Her second chance at a kiss with Harry?

She pushes herself up on her elbows, more alert. Her palms feel sweaty and she finds her fingers nervously toying with his comforter. A million thoughts are racing in her head as she searches Harry’s eyes, flickering back and forth, trying to see what he might be thinking of. He’s so hard to read. She feels like she’s drowning in his eyes. 

Almost as if he can read her thoughts, he leans forwards. She hopes she doesn’t look like an over-eager puppy, but her eyes light up and practically beg him to come closer, to just kiss her! He smiles to himself a bit, and obliges. 

With y/n laying on his bed, propped up by her elbows, and Harry already having been sat up on the bed, he doesn’t need to move that much closer for their faces to be aligned. He’s leaning over her, one hand holding him up, while the other hand comes up to her cheek.

She gasps when his large palm comes up to cup her face, his palm on her jaw and fingers sliding into her hair. He inches closer and closer, his eyes fluttering shut when his nose brushes against hers ever so lightly. She can feel the puff of his breathing against her lips, breathing in each of his exhales as she tries to stay calm. She forces her eyes shut, her entire body alive with butterflies.

He wets his bottom lip with his tongue, a force of habit, and nudges his nose against hers. She tilts her head to the side. He teases her for a second, gives her the chance to pull away by just grazing their lips together teasingly, and feels her sharp intake of breath at the contact. He can’t help but smirk against her lips.

With her eyes closed, she’s hyper aware of how it feels. The way his curls brush against her face… the warmth of his palm as he tilts her head upwards… the wetness of his lips as he finally… connects them… in a kiss. 

This was it. Her first kiss. 

There’s not one thought in her head, a stark contrast to how she’d spent countless sleepless nights overthinking the mechanics of kissing someone. She’d always worried that she’d mess it up, that she’d freeze and wouldn’t know what to do. 

But falling into the gentle caress of Harry’s lips is easy. Her nerves spill, her muscles relax, and she just lets herself melt against Harry’s lips. He suckles on her bottom lip gently, folds their lips together, pulls away with soft clicks just to reattach a second later. She sighs dreamily into his mouth and lets herself fall back into the bed, her head against his pillow. He doesn’t let their lips disconnect, following her down and climbing on top of her so that one of his legs is stationed between her thighs. 

She wonders if all kisses are this magnificent, or if it’s just Harry. Is it normal to feel your heart stuttering in your chest, or feel electricity flowing through your veins at just the touch of someone’s lips? Would she always lean her face into the palm of his hand, and let herself relax in the bliss of feeling his lips against hers?

It’s wonderful – a head-spinning, heart-fluttering, electrifying kiss. 

Harry’s hand that isn’t holding himself up comes down to rest on her thigh, goosebumps rising under his touch. His kisses start to grow more pressured, inhaling sharply and breathing heavily against her, tongue licking at the seam of her lips eagerly. His nose bends against her face as he tilts his head to the side, eyebrows furrowed in concentration as he tastes the sweet chapstick on her lips. Her skin is warm and soft and plushy underneath his touch, and her lips are addictive. 

He uses his grip on her thigh to hike her leg up, fitting his hips between hers and sliding his hand up and down her leg tantalizingly. He can feel her losing her breath, so he forces himself off of her lips and starts kissing down her neck. He skims his lips down, presses wet, hot kisses on her throat, his every breath making her core clench. 

She squeezes her eyes shut, eyes rolling into the back of her head, and takes heavy breaths, chest rising and falling shakily. Her hands come up to grab onto him – just hold onto him in any way – and the first thing her hands land on are his biceps. His firm, toned biceps, that are flexing as he hovers above her. In an effort to feel more grounded, she squeezes her fingers, but it just ends up making her even more lightheaded because god he’s so strong and muscular and he’s kissing her right now! 

She’s overwhelmed and her head is spinning and it feels like she’s in a dream, an amazing dream that feels so good and that she never wants to end – she can smell his aftershave and his shampoo and his overall yummy boy smell, and her lips are tingling with the aftermath of his kiss. She’d always imagined what it would be like to have her neck kissed and sucked on by a boy and now that it’s happening it’s better than she could’ve ever imagined, and she’s so sensitive, and it’s just different to have a real person touching you and kissing you all over, especially someone that she’s majorly attracted to and–

Harry presses his hips into her center and, wow, if it isn't the most arousing thing she’s ever experienced. Excitement and anticipation fill her veins… but then a trickle of doubt starts to filter in. She’d only just had her first kiss, was she ready to go any further than that? 

‘H-Harry,” she says, but it’s more of a moan because his fingers squeeze her hips and he’s kissing right underneath her earlobe right now and it’s sending shivers down all over her body. “M-maybe we should stop.”

“Hm?” He pulls away from where he was buried in her neck, his eyes blown out and lips slicked with a mix of their spit. 

“I-I’m not ready to have sex with you, if that’s what you want.”

“That’s okay,” he says, licking his lips. “I could just eat you out.”

And, god, if that doesn’t make her whimper. “I– no, I um…” she stammers over herself.

He smiles. “What is it?” he murmurs, an amused lilt to his voice.

“I… I haven’t done any of… that.” She swallows, looking at him nervously. Her heart, which had once been racing with excitement, now pounds with apprehension. This is the first time she’s been in this position and she’s feeling so vulnerable. 

It’s extremely scary and nerve-wracking and Harry’s silence is not doing anything to help her feel better.

“You’re a virgin?” he asks after a beat.

She nods. She feels insecure under his gaze, and even though she’s fully clothed, she feels totally exposed.

He laughs. “Are you really?” he asks again.

Her eyes flash with hurt. She just shared something extremely intimate with him, shared her very first kiss with him… and he was laughing at her?

She feels her heart drop, and her cheeks flame with insecurity. 

“Um–" she swallows around the lump developing in her throat. "I should go,” she says, barely over a whisper. She puts her hands on his chest and pushes him away, sliding out from underneath him and climbing out of his bed. Grabbing her ipad, she shoves it into her backpack, along with her notes that were scattered along his desk and her phone lying at the foot of his bed. Her cheeks burn hot and her heart is aching in her chest.

“What?” He doesn’t challenge her when she pushes him away, but he stares at her with his eyebrows furrowed, confused at the sudden mood shift. “What happened?”

She doesn’t answer. Her throat is hurting, the painful lump a tell-tale sign of the tears getting ready to fall.

“Y/n?” he asks again, getting off his bed and walking towards her. All amusement has left his face, brows furrowed in a concerned manner. She shrugs him off when he approaches her.

“Don’t.” She feels embarrassed, her mind only filled with insecurity. He was making fun of her for being a virgin, teasing her. As if she wasn’t already embarrassed enough about it herself.

She’d planned on calling Maddie to come pick her up when she was ready to go, but it doesn’t matter anymore. She leaves his room hastily, before any of the tears can fall, and nearly runs out of his apartment. 

She’ll walk home. 

˙· .° ｡  ˚ ｡  ° . · ˚ ˙ · . ° ｡ ˚ ｡  ° . · ˙ · .° ｡ ˚ ｡ °.  · ˙ ‧̍̊  

OMG!!! HOPE U GUYS LIKED ITTTTTT HEHEHEHE :-) part 3 is up on my patreon already and will come to tumblr next saturday (augsut 5) pleeeeaaaase lmk what u think and give her a rb and a comment i LOVE U GUYS SO SO MUCH!!!!

sunshine (part 3) - in which y/n just wants to get this whole virginity thing out of the way, and Harry needs to grovel a bit before she forgives him.

sunshine masterlist

[isaacthedruid]

assigning the characters from 9-1-1 my tattoos—

buck: the sexy little strawberry in cowboy boots on my bicep aka the only tattoo that’s usually not visible. it’s a tattoo just for him, it’s inspired by drag queens and queer culture and it’s also just a little fun and silly. he definitely got it a little while after coming out as bisexual. this was a very cathartic tattoo for buck, he definitely had got it with eddie at the appointment with him.

eddie: the word “human” tattoo above the crease of my elbow. this tattoo has a lot of personal meaning I won’t go into but for eddie, I could see it have a very strong meaning too. no matter the fuck ups, no matter the jobs, he’s human. he’s just human and that’s more than enough. frank was very supportive of the tattoo after he showed up with in one session.

chim: the eyeball in a candy wrapper aka “eye candy” just below crease of my elbow. it’s absolutely a pun and a silly tattoo for him.

maddie: the stages of growth of a pumpkin (from seed to sprout to full grown pumpkin) on the back of my arm. for her, to would be able her growth as a wife, an ex-wife, a mother, and a remarried woman, and mostly importantly, her growth as herself.

hen: the fern tattoo on my side of my hand and up onto my thumb (though I could also give it to buck since oliver has a very similar tattoo on his arm) now, there isn’t much meaning in this tattoo for myself personally but for hen, it’s her reminder and connection to the world. that no matter how bad or scary a job gets and it feels like the calamity is all she can focus on. she is still carrying that bit of nature and the real world with her.

bobby: the three eyes on my upper arm, to bobby it would represent the three kids in his life; may, harry and buck. and in the third eye, there are three pupils to represent his two lost children and his passed wife. this was an emotional tattoo for bobby to get, and he cried explaining it to buck who went with him for emotional support to his tattoo appointment.

athena: the ferns, mushrooms and buttercups on my forearm. now to me this tattoo represents my childhood and now adulthood through the plants from my favourite video games in both stages of my life. i could see athena assigns different plants to the stages of her life like pre-motherhood, motherhood and even to bobby and michael and even emmett.

(the only other tattoo i have that i can’t think to assign a character to is the tooth tattoo on my upper arm. there’s no real meaning to it but i love it so much yknow.)

[thefundiedata]

A Complete Duggar Family Overview

J*** & Anna Duggar

Years Married: Too Many (16) Children: 7 (Mackynzie, Michael, Marcus, Meredith, Mason, Maryella, Madyson) Predicted Family Size: 7 children

John & Abbie Duggar

Years Married: 6 Children: 2 (Grace, Charlie) Predicted Family Size: 4 children (2026, 2029)

Stephen & Jana Wissmann

Years Married: 0 Children: 0 Predicted Family Size: 4 children (2025, 2027, 2029, 2032)

Derick & Jill Dillard

Years Married: 10 Children: 3 (Israel, Samuel, Frederick) Predicted Family Size: 7 children (2025, 2028, 2030, 2034)

Jessa & Ben Seewald

Years Married: 10 Children: 5 (Spurgeon, Henry, Ivy, Fern, George) Predicted Family Size: 9 children (2026, 2028, 2031, 2034)

Jeremy & Jinger Vuolo

Years Married: 8 Children: 2 (Felicity, Evangeline) + 1 on the way Predicted Family Size: 5 children (2028, 2032)

Joe & Kendra Duggar

Years Married: 7 Children: 4 (Garrett, Addison, Brooklyn, Justus) Predicted Family Size: 12 children (2025, 2027, 2029, 2031, 2033, 2035, 2037, 2039)

Josiah & Lauren Duggar

Years Married: 6 Children: 3 (Bella, Daisy, Ezra) Predicted Family Size: 11 children (2025, 2027, 2029, 2031, 2034, 2036, 2039, 2042)

Austin & Joy Forsyth

Years Married: 7 Children: 3 (Gideon, Evelyn, Gunner) Predicted Family Size: 8 children (2025, 2029, 2032, 2036, 2040)

Jed & Kate Duggar

Years Married: 3 Children: 2 (Truett, Nora) + 2 on the way Predicted Family Size: 10 children (2026, 2028, 2030, 2032, 2034, 2036)

Jer & Hannah Duggar

Years Married: 2 Children: 2 Predicted Family Size: 10 children (2025, 2027, 2029, 2031, 2033, 2035, 2038, 2040)

Jason & Maddie Duggar

Years Married: 0 Children: 0 Predicted Family Size: 8 children (2025, 2027, 2029, 2031, 2033, 2036, 2038, 2041)

Justin & Claire Duggar

Years Married: 3 Children: 0 Predicted Family Size: 3 children (2025, 2032, 2039)

[kaylinalexanderbooks]

Find the word

Thanks to @writingsfromspace for the tag!

My words: find, water, star, fly

Your words: ground, copy, thought, bottom

Tagging @awritingcaitlin @writernopal @winterandwords @sarandipitywrites @mjjune @dyrewrites @sarahlizziewrites @i-can-even-burn-salad @sleepywriter00 @sunset-a-story @stesierra @imsoveryveryconfusedatlife @finickyfelix

TSP intro

TSP tag list (ask to be +/-): @thepeculiarbird @illarian-rambling @televisionjester @finchwrites

Keep reading for:

Ash nearly faints

Take a shot of water every time I say water in this excerpt

Argument between Rose and Maddie

Gwen meets Akash

Find - from The Secret Portal Part One (Ash POV)

I felt like collapsing in a cluster of red ferns by the time I reached the trees. Soon, I was using the trunks to hold myself up. A sudden ringing in my ears made my head feel like it split open. I let out a cry as I pressed my fingers to my forehead. I heard a little girl screaming. I tried to find the origin of the sound, but I found no one. The screaming didn’t stop. I kept going forward, covering my ears, trying to make it go away. I collapsed on the ground in a patch of violet-colored flowers, curling into a ball. My head spun as I stared at the petals. They weren’t like any other flower I’d seen. Their purple color was so vibrant, I debated its existence. There were three layers of tear-shaped petals swirling around the center, creating a dizzying spiral. I closed my eyes; the petals were making me sicker. Slowly, the screaming stopped. My vision cleared. I shook my head and pulled myself up and rested my body on the nearest tree trunk. I closed and opened my eyes slowly as the world slowly came back into focus. What just happened? Who was that?

Water - from The Secret Portal Part One (Ash POV)

I entered the kitchen, pushing off the wall so I could rummage through the cabinet. I pulled out a glass and filled it with water from the fridge. I guzzled the water but almost spit it out. As soon as the water graced my lips, a sudden blue light flashed in front of me. Shaking it off as an effect of the devices, I refilled the glass to the brim. The blue lights happened again. During the third refill, my eyes rested on the time, a small light on the fridge. It was six am. There was no way I used the devices before even two. And there was no way that vision took more than five minutes. “Shit!” I hissed as my shock caused the water to spill over the glass. I guzzled the water again before grabbing a towel to clean up my mess. Once I did, I stood back up, tossed the towel on the counter, and looked at the clock again. I sighed. I wasn't sure what I was going to do in the remaining time that I had before everyone else awoke.

Did you take the shots of water? Do you have to pee yet?

Star - from The Secret Portal Part One (Maddie POV)

“What’s happening?” Rose murmured. “You lead us through a death portal,” I muttered, joking slightly. Rose swiveled her head toward me. “Excuse me? You were the one who had a mental breakdown when Lexi didn’t answer her damn phone!” “Well, Lexi and Ash ended up here, so I had the right idea,” I said, not sure why she was mad. “Fine. You were right. Gold star.” Rose glared down at me. “And don’t blame me for what happened to Noelle.” “It’s partially my fault,” I said, lightly pushing her away from my face. “I suggested Lexi's disappearance, but you led us here, so a bit of yours, too.” Rose stepped toward me again. “This. Is not. My fault.” “I said it’s partially my fault,” I insisted, pushing her away again. She pushed me back this time, which irritated me. I only pushed her because she was in my face. “Why don’t you admit you’re partially responsible for Noelle’s injury?” I pushed in retaliation this time. “We’re gonna get her to a hospital, and then we’re gonna look for my sister, who you seem to have forgotten about because you’re too wrapped in yourself to care if Lexi’s okay.” I bit my tongue. That wasn't a good thing to say. I wasn't sure where it came from. Rose’s jaw clenched. She lifted her fist—I thought she would push me again, but she just jabbed me with her finger on every word— “Don’t. Ever. Say. I don’t care about Lexi. She means more to me than you could imagine.” “I’m her sister,” I pointed out. “How could you—” I poked her back— “imagine how much she means to me?” Rose took a step back. She looked down at her feet for a second. I did the same. Gwen pointed out I was arguing earlier when I didn’t mean to, which sometimes happened to me. Arguing wasn’t gonna get Lexi—or Ash—back, and it wasn't gonna get Noelle to a hospital either. I wondered if Rose would hate me forever after this.

Fly - from The Secret Portal Part One (Gwen POV)

My left foot slammed into a vent cover, knocking me off balance and causing my butt to slam against the cover, knocking it off. I fell through the hole and somehow managed to grab the edges of the vent. I heard the cover crash onto the floor below me as I dangled from the ceiling. “Hey, who’re you?” a voice said. I looked around, trying to find the owner of the voice when my eyes finally rested on a boy. He was probably a year or so older than me with dark brown skin. He had short and spiky hair and his ears stuck out a little. He wore a yellow polo t-shit over a long-sleeved white shirt and dark-blue jeans. It took a moment to realize the boy was at eye level while I hung from the ceiling. I looked down and saw the boy’s feet were a good ten feet from the ground. He was floating. “Who are you?” the boy repeated. I looked back up. I realized he was kinda cute. Even with the messy bedhead. “Um, Gwen.” “Akash,” he said. Actually, especially with the messy bedhead. I realized I was staring when Akash smiled. “You’re new around here, aren’t you?” When I didn’t answer, he added, “You want me to help you down?” I nodded, and Akash wrapped his arm around me. I flinched slightly—a cute boy was touching me!—but allowed him to do so. I let go of the vent and let him fly me to the floor. I suddenly realized I had wrapped my arms around him. I quickly pushed away from him. “Thanks,” I muttered. I glanced off to the side and panic ran through me when I noticed a bed. I could feel my cheeks turning red. I just fell into a cute boy’s room! As if I wasn’t embarrassed enough.

[roosterforme]

roosterforme's fic challenge #love is in the air tgm

Let's celebrate Valentine's Day the Top Gun way! Choose a love song, any love song that you want, and write a fic about one or more of our favorite Top Gun characters!

Rules:

Please use the #love is in the air tgm hashtag!!!

Once you have your song selected (first come, first served, no duplicates), please send me an ask letting me know which song and character(s) you want to write about. If your song is not listed below, just let me know what you want with your ask and I’ll add it (within reason, of course). If your song has been claimed already, I'll let you know so you can choose another one

You can use the song in the fic however you would like. Use it as the title, use some lyrics, have the song playing in the background, anything you want!

Minimum word count: 1k

There is no real time limit, but please try to post around Valentine's Day, or during the month of February.

Please make sure you tag me (or send me a message) when you post your story so I don’t miss it. I can’t wait to read and reblog!

Please reblog and share this with anyone who may want to participate

If you’re under 18, do not submit or read smut

Songs are listed after the cut:

If you don't see a song you like, send me an ask and I will add it for you!

Current Playlist:

1 @familyvideostevie Let's Get It On by Marvin Gaye (Bradley)

2 @semperhuggs Perfect by Ed Sheeran (Jake)

3 @bradshawsbitch You're My Best Friend by Queen (Bob)

4 @gretagerwigsmuse Everlasting Love by Love Affair (Bradley)

5 @bradshawsbaby My Girl by The Temptations (Hannix)

6 @wkndwlff Slow Dancing by Aly & AJ (Jake)

7 @beyondthesefourwalls Wildflowers & Wine by Marcus King (Bradley)

8 @roosterforme Hello, I Love You by The Doors (Bradley)

9 @hangmanbrainrot At Last by Etta James (Jake)

10 @cherrycola27 Desire by U2 (Bradley)

11 @theharddeck Yours by Russell Dickerson (Jake)

12 @bradshawsbaby Can't Take My Eyes Off You by Frankie Valli (Bradley)

13 @wildbornsiren Can't Help Falling In Love by Elvis (Bob)

14 @thedroneranger Talk You Out of It by Florida Georgia Line (Jake)

15 @whisperofsong Late Night Talking by Harry Styles (Jake)

16 @mothdruid Just the Way You Are by Bruno Mars (Javy)

17 @sometimesanalice Like I Can by Sam Smith (Bradley)

18 @little-wiseone Love Me Like You Do by Ellie Goulding (Jake)

19 @bolaurel You Can't Hurry Love by The Supremes (Bradley)

20 @high-bi-imgonnacry Next Thing You Know by Jordan Davis (Jake)

21 @thedroneranger Kind of Love We Make by Luke Combs (Bradley)

22 @cherrycola27 Burning Up by the Jonas Brothers (Jake)

23 @laracrofted Delicate by Taylor Swift (Bob)

24 @beyondthesefourwalls The Good I’ll Do by Zach Bryan (Jake)

25 @cherrycola27 Until I Found You by Stephen Sanchez (Bradley)

26 @blackwidownat2814 All of Me by John Legend (Jake)

27 @godsfavoritebabe Endless Love by Luther Vandross (Bradley)

28 @cassiemitchell Friends Don’t by Maddie and Tae (Jake)

29 @sylviebell Everything Has Changed by Taylor Swift (Rooster x Phoenix)

30 @madsnowstorm Beyond by Leon Bridges ft Luke Combs (Jake)

31 @jynxmirage If I Ain't Got You by Alicia Keys (Bradley)

32 @bussyslayer333 Lovefool by The Cardigans (Bob)

33 @desert-fern La Dah Dee by Cody Simpson (Jake)

34 @cassiemitchell Worldwide by Big Time Rush (Bradley)

35 @jynxmirage Tennessee Whiskey by Chris Stapleton (Jake)

36 @desert-fern Dandelions by Ruth B (Natasha)

37 @avaleineandafryingpan Like My Father by Jax (Bob)

38 @roosters-girl Just What I Needed by The Cars (Bradley)

39 @hangmanstigerlily Can't Fight This Feeling by REO Speedwagon (Jake)

40 @call-sign-shark Addicted to Love by Robert Palmer (Mav)

41 @myfaveficrecs I'll Make Love to You by Boyz II Men (Bradley)

42 @roosterforme The Kind of Girl I Could Love by The Monkees (Bob)

43 @rae-gar-targaryen This Old Heart of Mine by the Isley Brothers (Mickey)

44 @shrimping-for-all Letters by Why Don’t We (Bradley)

45 @bradshawsbitch Secret Love Song by Little Mix (Natasha)

46 @floyd-luvr About You by The 1975 (Bob)

47 @floyd-luvr Ain't No Mountain High Enough by Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell (Bradley)

48 @semperhuggs Need You Tonight by INXS (IceMav)

49 @nocapesdahling You Send Me by Sam Cooke (Jake)

50 @nocapesdahling By Your Side by Sade (Bradley)

51 @ssprayberrythings Black and White by Niall Horan (Jake)

52 @daughterofautumn All You Need Is Love by The Beatles (Mickey)

53 @daughterofautumn Lay All Your Love On Me by ABBA (Bob)

54 @callsignseagull I love you by JP Saxe (Jake)

55 @gennyanydots Untouched by The Veronicas (Bradley)

56 @gennyanydots Here In Your Arms by Hellogoodbye (Bob)

57 @thebirdandthebee Congratulations by Mac Miller (Bradley)

58 @endofdays56 Right Here Waiting by Richard Marx (Bob)

59 @notroosterbradshaw These Arms of Mine by Otis Redding (Bradley)

60 @avengers-fixation I Don't Wanna Set the World On Fire by VoicePlay (Jake)

61 @amysteryspot I Will Always Love You by Whitney Houston (Bradley)

62 @beyondthesefourwalls I Don't Love You Like I Used To by John Legend (Javy)

63 @valhallaas Love Me Tender by Elvis (Jake)

64 @daughterofautumn Your Body Is a Wonderland by John Mayer (Mickey)

65 @hangmans-wingman I Don't Want to Miss a Thing by Aerosmith (Jake)

66 @tongue-like-a-razor Truly Madly Deeply by Savage Garden (Bradley)

67 @tongue-like-a-razor I Wish It Would Rain Down by Phil Collins (Jake)

68 @hurricanerex666 Kiss Goodnight by I Don't Know How But They Found Me (Bradley)

69 @roosterbruiser Fruits of My Labor by Lucinda Williams (Jake)

Songs You May Want To Use:

At Last by Etta James

Addicted to Love by Robert Palmer

Desire by U2

Let's Get It On by Marvin Gaye

Just What I Needed by The Cars

You Can't Hurry Love by The Supremes

Late Night Talking by Harry Styles

I'll Make Love To You Boyz II Men

Can't Help Falling In Love by Elvis

Can't Take My Eyes Off You by Frankie Valli

Beautiful Stranger by Madonna

Love Me Like You Do by Ellie Goulding

Lovefool by The Cardigans

Best I Ever Had by Drake 

Perfect by Ed Sheeran

Love Story by Taylor Swift

All You Need Is Love by The Beatles

Need You Tonight by INXS

I Will Always Love You by Whitney Houston

All Of Me by John Legend

Just the Way You Are by Bruno Mars

My Girl by The Temptations

[fundieshaderoom]

Duggars and Adjacents Spotted in the J&J Vlog of Jason and Maddie's Wedding

Jim Bob, Michelle, James, Jackson, Johannah, Jennifer, Jordyn, and Josie Duggar

Jana and Stephen Wissmann

John, Abbie, and Charlie Duggar

Jessa, Ben, Spurgeon, Henry, Ivy, and Fern Seewald

Jill, Derick, Israel, Samuel, and Freddie Dillard

Jinger and Jeremy Vuolo

Joy, Austin, Gideon, Evelyn, and Gunner Forsyth

Josiah Duggar

Jedidiah, Katey, Truett, and Nora Duggar

Jeremiah, Hannah, and Brynley Duggar

Jason and Maddie Duggar

Justin and Claire Duggar

Gil Bates

Carlin and Evan Stewart

Travis Clark

Laura DeMasie

Jackson and Emerson Bates

Elijah Kaneshiro

Evan Peters

Lauren Nakatsu

Noah Robinson

The dude with the white beard that looks like Santa

[blackswallowtailbutterfly]

Plant names that are used as names or might be nice as names

Abelia (Abby, Bibi, Bel, Bee, Lia)

Achillea (feminine of Achilles; Lea)

Aletris (like Alexis or Beatris; Al, Allie, Tris, Trissy)

Alisma (Al, Allie, Lee, Alis, Lissy)

Alliaria (Al, Allie, Lia, Lee, Ria)

Amaranthus (actual name already; Amy, Mara, Anne, Annie)

Ambrosia (actual name already; Amy, Rosie)

Ammophila (Amy, Phil)

Andromeda (actual name already; Anne, Annie, Andy, Mimi)

Angelica (actual name already; Angie)

Anise (Anne, Annie)

Anthea (actual name already; Anne, Annie, Thea)

Apple (actual name already)

Aquilegia (Gigi)

Aralia (Lee, Lia)

Argemone (Gem, Gemmy, Monnie)

Argentina (Gen, Genny, Tina)

Arisaema (Aris)

Aronia (Ro, Nia)

Artemisia (actual name already; Art, Arty, Mimi, Missy)

Ash/Ashley (actual name already)

Aster (like Esther)

Barley (like Bartley)

Betula (Bett, Bettie, Tula)

Bluet (Blue, Bett, Bettie)

Blossom (actual name already)

Calla (Cal, Al, Allie)

Callirhoe (Cal, Al, Allie, Ro)

Caltha (Cal, Al, Allie)

Calystegia (Cal, Al, Aly, Gia)

Carya (actual name already)

Celastrus (like Celeste; Cece, Cela)

Celosia (like Celeste; Cece, Cela)

Celtis

Chelone (Lonnie)

Cherry (actual name already)

Clarkia (Clark, Kia, Kiki)

Claytonia (Clay, Toni)

Clematis (Clem)

Cleome (Cleo, Clem, Mimi)

Clintonia (Clint, Lin, Toni)

Clover (Clo)

Comandra (like Cassandra; Anne, Annie, Andy, Maddie, Mandy)

Commelina (Mel, Lina, Melly, Lin, Lee)

Cotton

Dahlia (like Delia or Thalia)

Daisy (actual name already)

Dale (actual name already)

Dalea (like Delia or Thalia)

Daphne (actual name already)

Datura (Dottie, Tura)

Della (actual name already)

Dianthus (Dia, Dianne, Anne, Annie)

Dicentra

Drosera (Dro, Ro, Sera)

Dryas

Erigenia (Eri, Gigi, Gen, Genny, Genie, Genia, Nia)

Evadne (actual name already; Eve, Evie, Eva)

Fern (actual name already)

Filipendula (Fil, Filly, Flippa, Penn, Penny)

Flower/Fleure/Flora/etc. (actual names already)

Forest (actual name already)

Gale (actual name already)

Ginger (actual name already)

Grindelia (Dede, Delia, Lia)

Halesia (Hal, Hally, Al, Allie)

Hazel (actual name already)

Heather (actual name already)

Holly (actual name already)

Hydrangea (Hydie, Angie, Gigi)

Iris (actual name already)

Isotria (Izzy, Tria)

Juniper (actual name already; June, Junie)

Laurel (actual name already)

Lavender (actual name already; Lav, Vendy)

Leafie (actual name already)

Lemna

Liatris (like Beatris; Li, Lia, Tris, Trissy)

Lilac (like Lilah)

Lily (actual name already)

Linaria (Lin, Linny)

Lindera (Lin, Linny, Lindy)

Linnaea (Lin, Linny)

Lobelia (Lo, Lola, Bel, Lia)

Lonicera (Lon, Lonnie, Cera)

Lotus (actual name already; Lottie)

Lunaria (Lulu, Luna)

Magnolia (Maggie, Nola, Lia)

Malia (actual name already)

Maple (like Maybel; May)

Meadow (actual name already)

Melia (actual name already; Mel, Melly)

Melothria (Mel, Melly)

Mentha (actual name already)

Mertensia (like Mercedes)

Mitchella (feminine of Mitchel; Mimi, Mitch, Chella)

Monarda (Monnie, Mona)

Montia (like Monty; Monnie, Monty, Tia)

Myrtle (actual name already)

Myrica (like Erica)

Nemesia

Nyssa

Oakley (actual name already)

Olive/Olivia/etc. (actual name already)

Pansy (actual name already)

Peach (actual name already)

Peltandra (Pel, Tandy, Andy)

Persicaria (Persi, Kari, Carrie, Caria)

Petunia (actual name already)

Phyllis (actual name already)

Picea

Pilea

Pontederia (Ted, Teddie)

Poppy (actual name already)

Praline (Lina)

Primula (Prima)

Prunella (Nel, Nelly, Nella)

Robinia (Rob, Robby, Bob, Bobby, Robin, Nia)

Rose/Rosa/Rosaria/Rhode/etc. (actual names already)

Rosemary (actual name already)

Salvia (like Silvia; Sally, Vivi)

Sibara

Sida

Silvia/Sylvie/Sylvaine/etc. (actual name already; Vivi)

Tansy (actual name already)

Thuja

Tilia

Valley (Val, Al, Alley)

Vallisneria (Val, Valli, Al, Alli, Allis, Lissy, Neri)

Verbena

Veronica (actual name already)

Violet/Viola/etc. (actual name already; Vi, Vivi)

Willow (actual name already; Will, Willie)

Yarrow

Zea

[hinako-supremacy]

[[[[>[[[[[[this ask does NOT !!!!!!!!>!!>! supporst I don't know. What were we putting here afain.

Ahi maddie💞💞🫀💞🫀💞 Wwhats yr favorite kinda fern? And if you dontbhave one well 😼 consider getting one

this answer does not support 😼😼 i dint knwo either

googl was so ridiculously desperate to not give me a list of perns with pictures BUT HEART LEAF FERNS ARE A THING!??!?!

winner by default

[infj-zen]

The Serious ASMRtist Channel Personality Post

As opposed to the other ASMR and Personality post

Does the MBTI personality of an ASMRtist play a role in helping you relax?

ISFJ

Yeonchu @ kimyeonchu

ESFJ

Maddie @ Mad P ASMR

Maria @ Gentle Whispering ASMR

Semide @ Semide ASMR

ISTJ

Fern @ Fern's Holistic ASMR

Katie @ KatieASMR

Tiana @ Gentle Sunset ASMR

ESTJ

Jaylen @ Show Up & Glow ASMR

Victoria @ ASMR Victoria Sprigg Therapy & Meditation

ISFP

Melissa @ ASMR Beauty

@ Nefertiti ASMR

Silke @ Whispers of the Wolf ASMR

ESFP

Aishwarya @ Ice-Cinnamon Massage

Charlotte @ Fairy Char ASMR

Chelsey @ Chels ASMR

Ediya @ ediyasmr

Hannah @ Chili b ASMR & @ Chill with me, Hannah B

Julia @ itsblitzzz

Laura @ MinxLaura123 ASMR

Toni @ SCRATCHER GIRLS TACTILE ASMR & MORE

ISTP

@ Crochet & Crime ASMR

@ SkepticalPickle ASMR

ESTP

Ivy @ Ivy B ASMR

Katie @ xokatieASMR

@ K.O. ASMR

Luna @ Luna Bloom ASMR

INFP

Emily @ emvy ASMR

ENFP

Lotta @ Lotta's ASMR

[augment-techs]

Toss me a Power Ranger WLW ship and I'll see what I can do. Look, I'll even put in a starter deck because I NEED to be good about this. I promised I would do more for Pride Month and I have SHAMED myself.

Live Action:

Kim/Trini

Kim/Aisha

Kim/Sharkie

Kat/Tanya

Cassie/Ashley

Rita/Scorpina

Cassie/Psycho Pink

Ashley/Psycho Yellow

Karone/Maya

Kendrix/Maya/Karone

Adelle/Miss Appleby

Dana/Kelsey

Taylor/Shayla

Taylor/Alyssa

Jen/Katie

Jen/Nadira

Camille/Lily

Lily/Fran

Rose/Ronny

Kapri/Tori

Tori/Marah

Kira/Cassidy

Hayley/Elsa

Z/Syd

Kat/Z/Syd

Clare/Leelee

Vida/Necrolai

Necrolai/Itassis

Maddie/Clare

Summer/Dr. K

Dr. K/Gemma

Tenaya/Summer

Emily/Mia/Lauren

Dayu/Mia

Gia/Emma

Shelby/Kendall

Hayley/Sarah

Zoey/Roxy

Zoey/Betty

Roxy/Betty

Amelia/Izzy

Izzy/Fern

Jane/J-Borg

Boom! Comics:

Kimberly/Trini

Kimberly/Aisha

Trini/Kiya

Violet/Marleau

Hailey/Tasha

Coinless Trini/Scorpina

Scorpina/Rita

Coinless Trini/Coinless Aisha

Coinless Aisha/Coinless Kat

Ranger Slayer Kim/Scorpina/Coinless Trini

Aisha/Candice | Zelya

Zenith/Zelya

Ari/Remi

Psycho Pink/A Squad Charlie/Psycho Yellow

Slayer Kimberly/Tanya

Mia/Karone

Karone/Remi

Kelsey/Dana

Jamie/Grace

Andrea/Grace

Astronema/Divatox

Divatox/Rita

Kim/April O'Neil/Trini

If I forgot any, feel free to remind me.

[stylesloveclub]

sunshine pt. 2 (sneak peek)

In which Harry's a little bit nicer, and y/n is very excited to possibly, hopefully, maybe be kissed.

+++

“Oh,” she blinks quietly, staring down at the paper. “Why’s it so easy when you explain it?” 

He shrugs, leaning back down onto her bed, “y’just need a lot of practice.”

The bottom of his shirt rises up as he puts his hands behind his head, revealing a pair of black ferns that point towards a yummy v-line. Y/n tries her best not to look... but she’s reminded of the night where she showed up to his apartment to pick up Maddie… how he’d been shirtless, his abdomen so chiseled and firm. The swallows on his collarbones, the butterfly that seemed to jump with every breath. She finds herself getting a bit short of breath as she thinks about all of the things hidden beneath his shirt currently.

That’s the thing about being a touch-deprived, romantic girl like y/n. The littlest things get her going. 

He was nice to her once, helped her with her math homework and comforted her when she cried, and now her heart flutters like crazy when she sees him. Just the smallest rise of Harry’s shirt has her spiraling. 

She can’t help but notice the way his biceps bulge subtly as he puts his hands behind his head, and finds herself overwhelmed with the fact that this boy – an attractive boy – was just laying in her bed casually.

“Hey,” Harry says, snapping her out of her daydreams. She tears her eyes away from his ferns embarrassedly, hoping he didn’t notice. “What are you thinkin’ about?”

She averts her eyes, looking down at her bedsheet. “Um, nothing.”

He quirks his brows. “Nothing?”

“Mhm,” she nods her head innocently.

‘Really?” he asks again, his lip twitching with the slightest hint of amusement, sitting up on his elbows now. He raises himself up so that they’re face to face. He’s not an idiot.

She bites her lip nervously, and her heart stops when Harry’s eyes flicker down to watch. He stares at her with a strange look in his eye… a glimmer in them that she’s only ever read about in books. His eyebrows furrow as though he’s deep in thought, eyes still glued to her lips. 

She wonders if she’s hallucinating when he leans in. 

+++

SUNSHINE PART 2 COMING TOMORROW 07/29!!!!! PART 2 AND 3 ARE ALREADY UP ON MY PATREONNNN!!! :) THIS IS NOT A PATREON EXCLUSIVE MEANING ALL OF IT WILL BE POSTED ON TUMBLR, PATREON JUST HAS EARLY ACCESS!!!!

READ PART 1 HERE