#far too grown to be behaving this way
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ohello0 · 10 months ago
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Wack nicki again for me
Then pass me the stick
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yueebby · 1 year ago
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12:03 pm  — gojo satoru
synopsis. gojo tries to convince his first years that he was able to pull you.
contents. fluff, crack??, whipped!gojo, mentions of having a kid, he is SO in love with his wife it's disgusting, the first years are sick of their teacher
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“[name] sensei is a good looking woman, isn’t she?” yuji remarked, nonchalantly propping his feet up on the desk. “you think so too, right gojo sensei?”
a sly smile played on the corners of gojo's lips, eventually blossoming into a wide, dreamy grin. “good eye yuji! she's undeniably the most beautiful woman on this planet.”
megumi, seated at the desk beside yuji, couldn't hide his grimace.
nobara's expression mirrored that of a disgruntled sea urchin. “dream big, you two. she’s way outta both of your leagues.”
“she is, isn’t she?” gojo sighs dreamily, his gaze far away. a dopey grin settles over his face; like a man walking on air. it was deeply unsettling to the first years to see a grown man behave this way.
megumi rolled his eyes and muttered his disapproval, choosing to ignore his sensei, who had casually seated himself backwards on a chair.
gojo propped his chin with both of his palms, leaning closer into the first years students. “do you think i’d stand a chance with a woman like her?”
megumi buried his face in his hands, audibly groaning in response.
“a sensible woman like that and you? fat chance.” nobara deadpanned, squinting disapprovingly at her teacher. her negative comments elicit a grunt from the snow-haired man.
yuji’s eyes flit nervously from kugisaki to gojo. 
“sensei! i think you have a chance with [name] sensei!” yuji tried to reassure his white haired teacher, offering a thumbs-up. gojo responded by affectionately ruffling yuji’s hair.
megumi couldn’t help but speak up. “she’s a married woman, you know,” he mutters to his friend.
yuji’s eyes widened,  “you’re kidding! who do you think got the honor?” 
“but she’s so young!” kugisaki exclaimed, slamming her hand on the table. 
their discussion is cut short when the shoji doors of the classroom slide open abruptly.
with hands on your hips, you stood sternly before your first year students and their teacher, an air of authority about you.
satoru couldn't help but gulp; you were indeed captivating when you were upset. it’s not his fault that you look so cute when your eyebrows furrow and you puff up in anger.
“i waited for half an hour in the courtyard to start today’s lesson and yet here i find my students, along with their sensei who should be in kyoto for a meeting.” a wry smile graced your lips, sending a chill down everyone’s spine. the three first years bowed their heads in shame.
yuji thinks this is the first time he’s seen his teacher nervous. a bead of sweat appears on the side of gojo’s face.
“honey!” he quickly stands up and walks towards you. with every step he takes, nobara’s face scrunches up at his disgusting conduct. 
“don’t.” you warned, raising a finger up to keep satoru at an arm’s length. he respected your wishes to some extent, grasping your hand and placing it within the hold of his own. the diamond on your ring finger glistened as satoru toyed with it.
gasps filled the room as yuji and nobara observed the display of affection. just how inappropriate could their sensei get, and why were you allowing it? what would your husband think?
satoru tenderly caressed your hand in his, cradling it as he leaned in closer. “please forgive me; it was an honest mistake.”
“honest mistake my ass. yaga told me that this is the second meeting you’ve skipped out this month,” you stated, peering fiercely into his blindfolded eyes. satoru’s cocky demeanor wavered, replaced by a nervous chuckle.
“the first time was when i took you to naha, remember?” he wiggles his eyebrows suggestively. “and if i remember correctly, you enjoyed our night out,” your eyes widened, recalling the romantic trip satoru had organized. 
feeling the heat rise to your cheeks, you attempted to pull away, but his grip on your hand tightened.
“forgive me?” his voice softened, lips curving downward, giving him the appearance of a dejected kitten.
a sigh escapes your lips. he was going to be the death of you.
“fine. but this is the last time,” you warned, “and you owe me for covering for you.”
satoru straightened up, nodding fervently. “have i mentioned how much i love you?” wrapping an arm around you, he placed a kiss on the top of your head, despite your futile attempts to stop him.
“this is
” yuji’s jaw dropped.
“so inappropriate! shame on you!” nobara’s chair makes a harsh screech with how fast she leaves it to come to your aid. 
“kugisaki–” you attempted to calm her down, but she clung to your elbow, desperately trying to pry you from satoru’s embrace.
satoru’s hold on you tightened as he wrapped his other arm around your frame, pulling you close. he plops his chin on top of your head and resists nobara’s attempts to free you. like hell he’s letting anybody take his girl, not even his own student.
“crushing on a married woman is one thing, but to openly flirt with her– ” kugisaki struggled. you tilt your head in confusion. 
satoru’s strong arms flexed as he fought to maintain his hold on you. he nuzzled your neck. “’m fine right here,” he inhaled deeply, as if trying to take in as much of you as possible.
“[name] sensei! how can you stand there and let this man disrespect your marriage?!” nobara implored, wide-eyed, disregarding all respect she had for her teacher.  “how will your husband react when he finds how gojo sensei behaves around you?” she looks desperate, and you want to laugh at the sincerity behind her actions. you get it now.
only your idiot husband would pull a stunt like this.
“i hope your husband can fight because i’m willing to fight him to the death for your hand,” satoru mutters from your neck. you take your hand from nobara’s shoulders to shove the six-foot-three giant away.
“you seriously didn’t tell them, satoru?” you ignored his whiney protests as you created distance between the two of you. 
“tell us what?” kugisaki demanded. yuji was on the edge of his seat, nervously watching the unfolding scene, while megumi put his head down in embarrassment.
satoru looks at you with a deep frown on his face. uncertainty clouds your mind as his silence forebodes something. wetting his lips with his tongue, he quickly closed the gap between you, too fast for you to escape. a secure hand rested on your lower waist as your husband dipped you down to deepen the kiss. 
had you not been so absorbed into the kiss, you would have heard the scandalized gasps from your students.
you managed to place a hand on his chest to separate yourselves, “satoru, stop.” his eyes remained fixed on your lips, but he complied.
“yuji, nobara.. satoru and i are–” you hold up your ring finger for display.
“happily married!” your husband finished for you, a triumphant smile on his face. he squeezed you close, throwing up a peace sign. “been madly in love since i met her!” 
“what– no way! you pulled her?!” nobara spluttered, head whipping from satoru to you, unable to wrap her mind around the revelation.
yuji’s jaw is still on the floor, “megumi, you knew about this?!”
the sea urchin looks the other direction, avoiding his friends’ judgemental gazes.
“they
 raised me.. sorta..” he mumbles under his breath. your heart melts at his confession. unlike you, the other first years don't take too kindly to his comment, as they start shaking him by the shoulder and starting their own interrogation.
“and we did a good job too! don’t you think we’re ready for our own?” satoru smiles down at you jokingly, his hands snaking around your waist and his hands sneaking onto your stomach. he leaves a couple of soft pats. 
“you’re cuter when you’re quiet, y’know?” you whispered. taking advantage of your students' attention on megumi, you place a single finger on his lips, hoping your husband does not notice the way your face feels like it is on fire. 
he does.
“no need to be shy now,” satoru said, grinning wolfishly, “we’ll continue this at home.”
your face flushes even deeper.
unbeknownst to you, the first years had fallen silent, observing how gojo whispered in your ear, successfully turning you into a flustered mess. perhaps they should give more credit to their sensei.
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notes. not proof read (oh no). this was just a random scenario that has been plaguing my mind during halloweekend so i typed it on my phone at a party LOL this is me desperately trying to get out of my writing slump
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bohemiandeer · 9 months ago
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You know what hits me hard? When 5 to 6 year old children, all the way in Southeast Asia, knows about what's happening in Palestine right now. That children their age is getting bombed, that they're starving to death, that they're getting shot at, and sniped in the head. Because, just this past 2 or so months, I heard some of the little ones in the Kindergarten classes I'm TAing in as an Intern talk about it. Hell, one of the little boys downright said he didn't like Israel, because Israel is bad, because they do scary things. Another was questioning whether Palestine was bad too, because, "why else would they shooting at them?". A little girl in one of my classes doesn't want to finish her food at all, because she wants to save at least half her meat and rice for kids in Palestine, because she heard that, they don't have food. And that's just the ones I remember. Namely the inciting cases before their classmates slowly follow suit. The littles are fricking SCARED. We had to sit these kids down, and tell them that the topic is too mature for them at the moment, that they shouldn't even be concerned because they're KINDERGARTNERS, they're not even old enough to properly understand. The one teacher I was TAing for had to make a class announcement saying that. What gets me is, these are 5 to 6 year olds, the youngest I've worked with in this specific age group is 4. 5 years old on average, and they've already been exposed to the worst horrors genocide has to offer through the news and snippets of conversation among adults and hell, considering how many of them say they like to play games on Mama's phone, or their IPad, even from fricking social media. And the fact that, these literal babies, from all the way in Cambodia, has more empathy in their entire body and soul, than full grown fricking adults have in the nail of their pinky finger, gets me. FFS we as adults could LEARN from them I feel sometimes. I honestly don't know what to feel about it anymore. On the one hand, this is the next generation I'm working with. And if the next generation's default response to a tragedy such as Palestine, is what I've seen come up on occasion so far? Perhaps there's some bloody hope for this world after all. At least in this country. Especially since a majority of them already come from families who survived a genocide. These are the 3rd - 4th generation descendants of those who survived the Khmer Rouge. They've got grandparents at home, who no doubt are more than intimately familiar with what Palestine is going through right now. And it shows.
But on the other, it makes my heart sink because these are CHILDREN, these are LITTLE KIDS, they should be playing with their toys and watching cartoons and talking to their friends about everything from Spiderman to Speakerman to Kuromi and her friends, and be worried about whether or not they can go to playground that day, guranteed they're well behaved, or if Mama remembered to pack in their costume for swimming lessons that week. NOT JUST MY KIDS. But the little ones in Palestine too. They deserve better. They all deserve, so much better. Hell, it's come to the point that whenever I look at my kiddos right now, whether they'd be working in class, playing, doing something as mundane as eating lunch or getting ready for their nap. I think of the children their age in Palestine that didn't even get the chance to survive. I think of the ones whose memories from this age, is nothing but absolute horror and pain, rather than what has slowly become my normal, who never got to experience what my littles do on a daily basis right now.
Children shouldn't even be concerned about "War", about a Genocide. The last thing that should be on a 5 year old's mind, is pain, and suffering, and the worst horrors imaginable ever to be inflicted on a human being. ESPECIALLY WHEN IT'S INFLICTED, ON OTHER CHILDREN THEIR AGE. And for that alone, the world has failed them. Especially the kids in Palestine who didn't ask for any of this. They just wanted to carry on with life as kids do, the same way as my littles do on a daily basis no doubt, learning, playing, chatting with friends over their favourite cartoons and characters, worrying about whether they'd get to go to the playground or not that day.
I apologize for talking about this on this blog. I know my blog tends to be lighter in feel, a lot more unhinged and light hearted typically. I mean, I'm just a fricking nerd who likes to draw and write, and lurk about her favourite fandoms to consume and support what is shared among other nerds who also like to draw and write. But I couldn't stop thinking about it. About contemplating it, especially since I'll be back on a roll tomorrow, working with my kiddos again after not seeing them for 5 days straight because of Holidays. And, I just had to talk about it. This is something I felt I couldn't keep to myself this time, I don't think my soul'd be able to carry it. I had to talk about it.
FREE PALESTINE. Our children deserve better.
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herd-reject-arts · 1 year ago
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So I'm leaving work and something darts in front of me, maybe 10ft away, too fast for me to see what it is. Peek around the tree blocking my path and I see this
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Just like... a whole ass hawk. Dude's gotta be about 1.5ft tall. Massive fucking bird. And it's just staring me straight in my soul like this, even as I try to move ahead. It didn't budge. And there's only this path back to my car unless I want to walk on a busy highway. So I have the option of Death By Raptor or Death By Truck.
So I walk in the poison ivy filled patch off the sidewalk. Guy still isn't moving. Still staring me directly in the eyes. And I do this thing when animals are behaving strangely where I'll talk to them, so I'm just like, "Hey, man. I don't know you. You don't know me. This feels really threatening. I'm just trying to get to my car, dude. Can I get some space please? You're a big fucking bird. I see those claws. You could kill me right now, but I'd appreciate if you didn't, ok?"
It didn't move until I was about 2ft away. Again: I'm as far from it as I can be without walking into the street. It clearly wasn't going to budge. I walk past, thing flies up (silent, btw. Scary) and lands on a brick wall a little further ahead
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Anyway. Weird guy. Nearly shit my pants when I noticed a bird big enough to carry off a fully grown cat was just... there, staring me in the face, unwilling to move away from me, a human, something it should see as a threat. I watched behind me the whole rest of the way to my car, just in case this bird decided to help me shed this mortal coil. 10/10 experience. Super cool guy.
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beiasluv · 4 months ago
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lil ginger | op81
— shifter!osc, angst, lovie dovey ending?? that’s all đŸ‘č
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What would you do if you see a poor lil ginger cat following on your heels? A, be a meanie and leave him alone. B, take him back.
Obviously you had to choose B.
Never being a cat person, grown up with doggos all your life, you just really don’t know how to interact with one. Sure, you’d give them little pats and all—and clicking your tongue discreetly to see how far you can get it to follow. But this one was just
different.
“Hi—” you cooed. “Are you hurt, baby?”
The ginger and cream colored cat let out a friendly-meowing squeak, seeing that it had successfully gotten your attention. He skipped up to you, and sat down at your feet, tilting his head a set of large brown eyes staring back to you.
Adorable.
So you ended up kneeling on the concrete floor, getting weird looks from passersby. Only for them to realize it was a cat, then it was socially acceptable.
“Poor you,” you cooed as you nervously plucked the twigs and dust away, not really sure how to interact with a cat without getting a scratch.
“Fuck—I am not a cat person,” you mumbled to yourself. “Can I pick you up, little guy?”
Soon enough you did manage to get ahold of the ginger in your hands, realizing it’s a boy. His little ears pinned themselves down, resting his forehead on your chest, and a loud, soft, almost-purring-like meow came from him.
He wasn’t hurt, just a little filthy.
And if he had to guess, he would assume you weren’t a cat person, with the way you were holding him. But he’d appreciate the cuddles every now and then.
There was no collar, no tags to be found. But he was fairly too clean for a stray. And maybe just a little too well behaved.
After a moment of quiet cuddling with the ginger baby, you figured his owner would be looking for him soon enough. Or maybe his mother would come and get the youngster soon.
But would you be so mean and leave him alone?
“Look, if you come with me
I’ll
um
post you somewhere so they can get you back?” He was settled back down on the hard concrete floor, only wanting to see if he would even follow you home.
It also would be cruel to take him back without a little cat-consent
right?
The cat sat himself down, and looked at you, considering your offer. He let his tail flick around the floor, smacking the ground a few times as he thought about your words.
He padded after you, and jumped back up, stretching his bean paws against your leg, as if asking you to pick him back up again.
He wanted up. He wanted attention. He was a needy little bastard.
—
“Make yourself at home
well— no scratching my couch—” you warned as you set the feline down, taking off your coat.
The cat followed a few steps behind you, but when you went into the kitchen—he started to explore.
He climbed up your couch and sniffed around, as cats do, finding your throw pillow a little too inciting. He promised he wasn’t going to do anything to mess up your place, but he was just a cat.
And cats do sniff.
Just when you set out a bowl out of water in the floor, he hopped down from the couch and started to drink, almost desperately lapping the water up— almost like a man parched in the desert.
Watching the ginger feline was almost entertaining, lying yourself on the floor— getting the same eye-level as the cat.
“Okay, your name
” you tapped your chin.
The cat stopped drinking, and looked over at you. His brown eyes followed you as you laid back on the ground, watching you almost curiously. Figuring you out.
He meowed at your words, as if asking you to ‘go on.’
“How is
Daniel? Lucas?”
The cat sat back on his haunches, and tipped his head to the side. Judging you for the names you’d chosen. He let out a soft but slightly rude sounding noise, clearly disagreeing with your choices.
“Okay, that’s a ‘no’
what about
er
Pumpkin?”
He made the same noise, but this time it was louder. Definitely didn’t like the sound of that one. He gave you a displeased look, as if telling you to pick something ‘cooler.’
“Well? I can’t read your mind, mister,” you scoffed lightheartedly. “Ginger?”
Another huff from the cat and a tail smack on the floor.
At this point, you might just well give up.
—
“Here’s the bathroom
for
your business—”
So there you were, touring the cat around, hoping you weren’t going crazy. Not with the way the cat seemed to act/look/respond like it understood what you’ve said.
“And— you, only the foot of the bed is allowed.”
You explained, crawling under the covers. Followed by ‘Ginger’ as he jumped up onto your bed. He sat at your feet, and curled up against them, watching you as you got comfy.
A very polite little guy.
He’d let out a soft, almost human sounding sigh, and seemed to settle down. Kneading the bedding once or twice just to get comfy. And occasionally would be peeking his eyes open— just to mak sure you were still there. Only to be seeing you patting the space next to your waist.
“Fine— just here. No more.”
His eyes widened as you patted at the empty space in the middle of the bed. The cat waited a moment, as if he was expecting some kind of trap. Then quickly started to make his way up the foot of the bed.
You could only guess how much comfort a few inches difference can make of a spot. But, hey, he was just a polite little fella.
You grunted as you got out the bed, fetching him a small blanket you kept in your closet.
“If you get cold.”
He looked down at the offered blanket—inspecting it closely—before pushing his head under it, and starting to burrow. He didn’t seem too cold, but he liked it.
His head poked back out from under the blanket. From under the soft material, his eyes darted up to you, waiting to see if you’d get comfortable again.
—
You woke up, feeling something heavy on your stomach. Figured it was Ginger that moved during the night, so you reached down to pet it. Expecting to feel a layer of hair, but instead you felt what felt fleshy.
When you glanced down, instead of a small cat, you saw a man’s hand resting on your stomach, attached to a muscular arm.
This was not Ginger.
“What the fuck?” You groaned, pushing yourself further to the edge of the bed— rubbing your eyes like it would help you wake up from this dream.
The hand on your stomach shifted, letting out a soft groan at his swollen lips. “
What?”
You had to shift away from him, crawling off the bed. Pressing your back against the wall behind.
“Who are you?—no—How did you get into my room?”
The owner of the hand sat up, and pushed himself into an upright position. He had quite obvious bedhead— mussed up hair sticking in several directions.
And Oh. My. God. This guy was kinda ripped.
“I...” he said, rubbing a hand over his face, still trying to shake off his drowsiness. “I
” he was at a loss for words, as he looked around dumbfounded, trying to process what just happened.
“You what?—What did you do to Ginger?”
“I am Ginger.” He defended himself, his voice going high with a hint of an Australian accent. Squinting his eyes as he saw that you didn’t believe it.
“No? You’re clearly not a cat—I am calling the cops—”
“No! Wait—!” He put his pale, strong hand out to stop you from doing so. Running his hand through his head as the seconds ticked by quickly, trying to find the right way to explain.
“Ok, look—I know it’s a lot, but let me explain first, I just need you to calm down, yeah?”
“I have a fucking man in my bed—one that I don’t know— how am I supposed to know that you won’t jump and kill me. Also.” You breathed.
“You’re claiming that you’re a cat.”
“Look, just—” he began, as he ran his hand through his mussed up bed hair, trying to flatten it down. “I am a shifter—”
Oh.
“Right..” You should’ve known.
“I’m sorry—fuck. I should’ve just left you there— I’m so sorry–”
—
“Can it be permanent?”
The doctor gave Oscar a sympathetic look, his eyebrows raising at the question.
He had seen a lot of cat shifters before, lots of hopeless cases—some of them, and Oscar’s question wasn’t the first time he had heard the same phrase.
“You want to remain in a human body permanently, Mr. Piastri?” He repeated, humming softly as he went over the patient’s history.
The Australian nodded.
“Well
I must tell you. Some shifters have had success in taking medication to help them remain in their human form longer
” He started, seeing the youngster was willing to try. “We can work on a dose and let’s see if it gets you any results,” he added, writing down on the prescription.
“Yeah, I’ll try it—”
—
“You forgot this at my place?”
That snapped Oscar back into reality. Right. He had a casual dinner planned with you at his place. After his surprisingly pleasant interaction with you that morning, he was stuck.
Sure, it was full of you investigating him with all of the shifters’ fun facts and myths. But he handled it professionally. Yes, he’s somewhat conscious in the cat body. No, he can’t really help but to give into the cat instincts.
He needed to climb things, and meow, and rub his face against you, and what not. And, no, his parents are not shifters. Was that all of the questions?
Oscar would often found himself at your place, then vice versa. Just enjoying each other’s company, really.
Not to mention that one time you visited at the ‘wrong’ moment, greeting you in his all-glorious feline state. Even that. You were still nice enough to stick around with a fussy cat.
Oh, and you brought him a lot of cat treats.
Right, the dinner.
“What?”
“I think it’s yours,” you repeated, pushing a pill bottle prescribed with his name across the counter:
Shifting Suppressants Suppress transformation into animal form. Take twice a day.
He quickly reached out for it. “Oh, right, thanks–”
“Why?” You stopped him.
Sure, you weren’t in the place to talk about what medication he should be taking, but can’t a friend look out for each other? It was painfully obvious that he had gone from ‘pale’ to almost a ‘twilight-pale’ this past month, and don’t make you get started on his under eyes.
“Osc
I don’t wanna be pushy, but
I don’t think it’s good for you.”
You can see his face turning just a touch of guilty. And he would argue that the pills were helping with lessening his shifting.
“
I just wanna stay like this, Yn.”
It wasn’t the whole truth, he didn’t want to be like this because he preferred it.
He wanted this so he could feel normal. Just being able to be there and do something for you— not a helpless ginger cat. He had spent a good portion of his life transforming but— he was afraid you wouldn’t even want a cat around for the rest of your life.
“I want to be a human when you’re around— it makes me happy this way—”
“Oh, Osc–”
You frowned admiringly, rounding the kitchen counter to capture his hand. “I like you as a cat, I like you as a human. I don’t care— You’re still
you to me.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, I mean—I don’t want to kiss a cat, but I still want to cuddle and spend time— even if you can’t talk.
But I’d still like to kiss a human, for sure.”
“
You mean it?”
“Fuck, yes, I do—”
“That’s good to know,” he smiled softly.
The next thing you knew, he was finding the courage to tug on your laced hands, closing the gap between your lips. His hand traced your jaw in all the perfect places, tugging your chin closer so he can pepper soft kisses all over your lips.
Pulling away with a cheeky smile.
“You make me want to overdose, y’know?”
Hey people, long time no see. đŸ‘čđŸ‘č HOW ARE YALL doinggg
Anyways, interacting anyway would be appreciated and, as always, today’s a good day to take care of yaself. xoxo’s
@namgification @jsjcue @c-losur3 @evie-119
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tragedybunny · 1 year ago
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Sated - Astarion x F!Reader
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Astarion has gone too long without blood and you're determined to make sure he's fed.
Astarion tries, but not everyday is a good day, and some days he’s still snappish and lashes out. The rest of your group has learned not to take it personally, in fact now that Karlach can touch people, she’s developed a nice trick of just suddenly hugging him when he’s a pain. Usually either indignant silence or grumbling compliance follows. “Behave yourself Fangs, or I’ll do it again,” the Tiefling grins at him during whatever fussing he spouts after. He’s grown fond of her, you can tell, even if he can’t yet. In a way he’s fond of them all, but Karlach’s open, kind nature has given them a bit of a sibling-like bond. Watching them interact always brings a smile to you, he needs more of that in his life, people who care for him genuinely. 
Today was not the best, but you shrug it off as concern overrides all else. He’s a little paler than usual and a little slower. There wasn't much out there among the shadow curse for him to feed off. Before you never had to question how much blood he needed to survive or where it would come from. But as you leave the formerly cursed land behind, you can tell he’s struggling. And yet, he hasn’t asked you about it. The one he’s supposed to trust more than anyone else. You’ve fed him plenty of times before, you would think he’d have come to you by now. Mentally, you scold yourself as you feel creeping insecurity. There has to be a reason for it, and now isn’t the time for selfish suspicion. 
That night, as everyone settles themselves around a fire, contemplating what the road to Baldur's Gate holds, you find him seated at the edge of the flickering light, as far away as he can get without being in the shadows. Could he be worried he might find himself tempted if he’s too close to everyone? This can’t continue, you tell yourself, not only for the sake of his suffering, but you can’t be sure he wouldn’t be tempted either. 
Grabbing a blanket from your shared tent, you take a seat beside him, wrapping it around both of you. “You feeling alright Starry Sky?” Gently, you wrap an arm around him, and feel the icy chill of his skin beneath his shirt. Not that his skin is ever all that warm, but this another level. 
“Just tired,” he smiles weakly at you. 
“And freezing,” your other hand reaches up to stroke his cheek lightly. 
Eyes closed, he leans into your touch. “You know, I don’t even really feel it. I’m not sure if I need to be warm at all.” 
“Hmm, even if you can’t feel it, you know why you’re freezing.” Leaning over you whisper to him, some things aren’t meant to include the others. “You’re hungry.”
“Perhaps a little, but I’m fine. I don't need you to start fussing over me constantly. There's an owlbear cub if you feel overtly maternal." The sharp words don't change the dark circles under his eyes, or how gaunt his cheeks look. 
"You're ridiculously obstinate, you know that right," a gentle kiss on his temple follows your words, so he knows you're not actually being cross with him. You’ve come to realize he can’t stand it when he thinks you’re mad at him. In the past, anger meant reprisal, punishment, and in the context of the two of you, punishment could only mean withdrawing your affection. At least that’s where his thoughts lead.  
"It is one of my better qualities," he leans over, head resting against your chest. 
Shifting, you position yourself so he's seated between your legs, easier to let him rest his weight on you. "I don't know why you don't just ask me. My blood not good enough for your refined palate anymore?" Laughing, you try to mask the actual hurt that's creeping in. The truth is letting him feed from you has always felt like an important part of your relationship, the time when you’re closest to him.
It's been a long journey and a few of your group are already wandering to bed, although you think you hear Shadowheart muttering about saving it for the tent, whatever she said, Gale laughs it off. “Not at all,” he’s uncharacteristically serious, “I just
” he sighs, for once at a loss for words, “it seemed like a lot to ask from you, after everything else.” 
“Everything else?” Lips leave light kisses on the top of his head as you brush your fingers through his hair.
“You know, lying to you, manipulating you, wanting you to still love me after all that. If I asked to feed from you, it would seem like I was trying to use you again.” Catching one of your hands, he kisses it and doesn’t let go. 
For a moment you don’t know how to respond, you’re still not entirely used to seeing the softer, sincere side of him. “I see why you would think that, but I don’t want you to suffer. Let me take care of you, any way I can. That’s what I’m here for. Well, that and teaching you to be less of a stubborn arse it would seem.” 
“Stop, you’re being entirely too sweet to me. It’s going to ruin my reputation around camp.” You let him have his moment of deflection and wait until he makes a frustrated noise. “But I can’t say I don’t want to.” 
“Take what you need love,” you reach up to undo your collar and pull the blanket more securely around the two of you for privacy. A part of you considers moving to the tent, but you’re worried he’d use the opportunity to try to put it off more.
With a soft sigh, his lips press to your neck in a delicate kiss, teeth piercing your skin moments later. Pain and ecstasy course through you as you hold back a sigh. The two of you become one in that instant, bound through blood to the singular beating heart you now share, intimacy unparalleled. While he drinks, you fight to stay lucid enough to whisper to him of love and comfort, reassuring him that needing this from you is no sin. You feel your own warmth traveling into his skin, and you watch it take on a blush of life. 
Before your world turns hazy, he pulls away, licking you clean, and returning his head to your chest, content to be held tightly. "I didn't take too much, did I?"
"No, you were perfectly careful dearest." The words bring a small smile to his lips, praise so new an experience for him, he hardly knows how to handle it. But you know he craves it, especially from you, and it makes you want to lavish it on him. 
The others have vanished, a small part of you worries they noticed and were uncomfortable, but you hope they would understand as your friends. You two should join them soon, Baldur's Gate awaits, with a journey there still ahead. “Come on, let’s get you to bed.” 
“A few more minutes love,” somehow he manages to snuggle tighter against you, “I did miss this.”
“Me too, don’t wait so long next time. I’m always here for you.” 
“There you go, being too nice to me again, silly girl.” Sitting up a bit he kisses you, fiercely, lips crashing together bruisingly, hands reaching to tangle in your hair, like a first and a last kiss all bound up in one and it leaves you gasping when he’s done. It’s as though he’s trying to express everything he feels in that one kiss. “I might get used to it if you’re not careful.” 
1K notes · View notes
theoldsports · 1 year ago
Text
Mirror
Coriolanus Snow x Reader. 6.1k words.
18+ some smut, but it’s dicey. dubcon, biting, fingering, nudity, nonconsensual touch, drugs/alcohol? rehab discussion briefly, threats of violence, the shower, struggle against media, one reference to a line from scripture, possessiveness, manipulation. it’s dark. prolonged exposure to it is bad for you.
longest one yet! chronologically follows Married 1+2 in the TRUCULENT series fairly rapidly. i really learned to love this one. upon editing, this story became way more about gaslighting and headfucking someone good and hard into relying on you. special thank you to @heavqn for beta-ing and ridiculous amounts of support and ideas. a lot of our pre-editing convos made this make much more sense to me. + votes are in: next installment/current WIP will be the wedding.
CLICK FOR MORE! CAN BE READ AS SERIES OR STANDALONE
The hand against her shoulder shook her for a moment, then much faster. The shaking lasted seconds or even minutes before [Y/N] pried her eyes open. Everything in the bedroom looked too real, too clear. Coriolanus stood above her. His hand had been doing the shaking. He looked like he had just returned from a run due to his clothes and sweat-stained hair. His hair had grown back more beautifully than before. [Y/N] remembered seeing him when she saw him in the stacks of Philosophy books at the library right after he had returned from Twelve. It was jarring. She had always fancied him a pretty boy even if she loathed him throughout their childhood. He was much different upon his return.
Coriolanus pulled himself up out of the comfort of their bed almost every morning, far too early, to go for a run. [Y/N] didn’t know how she would endure a lifetime of his too chipper morning behavior once they were married. Coming down after a night on morphling was hard and still, she did it over and over again. Coriolanus knew he couldn’t stand in the way of a little fun, but he wouldn’t allow it in their home, so [Y/N] had become involved in using it socially when it was available to her.
“Great. You look like a bum.” Coriolanus said, noting the dark and sunken crescents under her eyes.
“Good morning.”
“Good morning. You look like a bum.”
“I’m not a bum.” [Y/N] replied tiredly. She rubbed her eyes.
Last night, [Y/N] had gone out dancing with some of her friends. It was not a bachelorette party in so many words, but it filled the same purpose. It was also a stretch to call the people she went out with friends in so many words, but they filled the same purpose. [Y/N] hadn’t felt that she had people other than Coriolanus for sometime now. She had gotten very drunk and very high the night before, resulting in frustration from Coriolanus when she returned home. He always waited up by the front door when she was gone so long. Coriolanus did not like it when she wasn’t home with him. She would make it up to him somehow— she always did.
“Come on, up with you.” Coriolanus commanded. He sat on the edge of the bed and pushed her up to a sitting position. His voice was harsh, but his touch was soft. [Y/N] adored Coriolanusïżœïżœ careful, yet guiding touches. Unless his dick was in her, he only touched her with care like she was a porcelain figurine.
“Why all the rush?” [Y/N] yawned.
“You don’t remember?” Coriolanus sighed. He was upset in that pompous way of his. He rubbed his creased forehead. “Seriously, [Y/N]. I ask so little of you and you can’t even behave well enough to remember that we have an interview in
” he checked his watch. “Three hours.” Coriolanus said. It was false that he asked so little of [Y/N]. Sometimes, he asked too much.
An hour exclusive on Lucky Flickerman’s daytime chatter joint. Shit. That woke [Y/N] up. “That’s today!” She exclaimed. That was the only caffeine she needed to wake her up. “Fuck, I’m sorry, Coryo. I didn’t think—“
“No. No Coryo. No, you didn’t think,” Coriolanus said. He needn’t elaborate. “Shower. We’ve got to beat downtown traffic.”
[Y/N] swore Coriolanus scheduled things like this at the worst possible times just to make her look worse than him.
She pushed her shaky legs off the bed. As soon as she stood, [Y/N] felt like she was going to fall. Perceptively, Coriolanus stood and placed his ever-vigilant hand on her lower back to steady her. “You’re a mess.” He said flatly. [Y/N] could tell that Coriolanus felt damp from his run. It crossed her mind that Coriolanus drank bitter coffee, did his work on time, smoked very little and went on a run daily. [Y/N] regularly got too high to see straight and cried when she didn’t get her way. Some pair they were.
“‘M not.” she protested messily. She didn’t want to admit that Coriolanus was right.
Coriolanus huffed indignantly, but did not reply otherwise. He walked her to the bathroom like marching a child to the naughty step. [Y/N] was set down on the low counter-top. “I’m concerned you’re going to slip and give yourself a black-eye,” Coriolanus said. “I don’t want people to think I hurt you.” He pulled his track jacket off and dropped it on the floor and reached over to take her short magenta teddy off. She felt desperately bare in front of Coriolanus as she was striped mechanically like a child’s doll. The teddy she wore was one of her favorites, with the delicate lace on the bust. She appreciated that Coriolanus was equally as delicate as the lace when handling it. He must have remembered how much [Y/N] liked it. Coriolanus remembered everything.
[Y/N] was simply impressed she had gotten herself into pajamas after last night at all.
“You’re going to ruin yourself if you keep doing this, you know.” Coriolanus said, starting the shower water.
“So you keep telling me,” [Y/N] shivered due to her bareness against the bathroom tile. “I’m sorry.”
Coriolanus deflected with a shake of his head. He turned to her. Coriolanus was obviously thinking about speaking as the water heated up. Hot water whenever desired was Coriolanus’ number one favorite thing about rebuilding the Snow fortune. That’s why he took his showers too hot; to prove that he could. The thought gave him the confidence to speak. “Do I make you feel so ill that you have to run around and treat yourself like this? Did I do something?” The insecurity of that question made [Y/N] raise an eyebrow. Sometimes when she looked at Coriolanus and realized he was still a boy in many regards. Twenty-three wasn’t very old at all. His frontal lobe wasn’t even finished developing. His primary desire was to be enough for himself, for her, and for everyone else too. [Y/N] feared that he worried he hadn’t figured that out yet. The girl was far from figuring that out herself as well. She rarely saw vulnerability slip through the cracks in the finished marble exterior that built Coriolanus Snow. But who knew if what he said was a true feeling of his or not.
“No,” [Y/N] said. She looked down at her manicured toes. “I did this before we were, y’know
 You’ve seen me at house parties since the Academy. You know it’s not you.”
“It has to stop,” Coriolanus started, dashing that fear from his mind. [Y/N] permitting a discussion without blocking him out unpowered him to share his concerns. “It worries me when you’re out late with who knows who. With so many people seeing you. It’s not just part of an act, it’s bad for you.” He said, but what he meant to say was it’s bad for me.
“I knew you had jealousy problems, Coriolanus, but being worried you can’t personally compete with your girl’s partying habits is
 hilarious.” [Y/N] attempted a joke. She saw the vein in Coriolanus’ neck throb. His eyes got cold when his vulnerability, no matter how shallow, was met with rejection.
“Get in the shower.”
[Y/N] cast her eyes down, took off her panties and did what she was told.
“It’s so hot!” She all but screamed.
[Y/N] let the water scald her skin. She didn’t want to complain at his trying to help her. “You’ll deal with it,” Coriolanus said, sliding the shower door shut behind the both of them. [Y/N] hadn’t even noticed him undressing, but here they were. They had never been in the shower together before. It wasn’t unpleasant, but the circumstances were. “For the record, I don’t have a ‘jealousy problem.’” He said after a moment of allowing [Y/N] hair to get damp enough to shampoo.
“Really?” [Y/N] bit back, reaching clumsily for her shampoo bottle with slippery fingers.
“Really. Jealousy isn’t a problem when you understand what’s rightfully yours,” Coriolanus said. Normally, she blocked Coriolanus out when he spoke like that. Maybe it was physical proximity or toxic prolonged exposure to Coriolanus, but that made her blush red in the face. Ignoring it, [Y/N]’s fingers closed around her pink and brown shampoo bottle, but Coriolanus snatched it out of her fingers effortlessly. “Let me. I want to be sure it gets done,” He muttered with a passive aggressive edge. That attitude seemed like a put-on to [Y/N]. She wondered if he wanted an excuse to be close to her. She made those up sometimes to be close to him. Maybe she was just flattering herself. Coriolanus squeezed some shampoo into his palm and set the bottle down on the shower ledge. “Who were you out with anyway?”
“Um
 Some of the girls. Lysistrata. Oh, Clem. Some others.” [Y/N] braced a hand against the damp wall to steady her feet on the slippery ground.
“Clemensia?” Coriolanus asked, sliding his fingers into her hair, careful as ever. It felt newly intimate in a way that Coriolanus typically avoided with her.
“Who else?”
“I see. You know she’s—“
“I know you don’t like her.” [Y/N] said. Coriolanus was silent.
“I don’t like when you go out without me. I just worry.” He finally said.
“I’m sure you do.”
It was silent between them. Coriolanus worked the shampoo into her hair easily. A man known for his rough intensity being gentle with anything was a surprise to her.
“Did you see anyone else?” He asked nonchalantly.
[Y/N] sighed. Even casual conversation turned to interrogation. She wasn’t sure if he meant it, or if it was all he knew how to do. “Do you mean
 Was I photographed behaving in some unsightly way? I dunno. I probably was. I wasn’t unfaithful, if that’s what you’re implying.”
“Stop.” Coriolanus said, leaving no room for further argument.
It was quiet again. “Thank you for washing my hair. That’s, uh, it’s very kind.”
“Don’t mention it.” He replied, coaxing [Y/N] back under the water to rinse out the suds. His long fingers combed back through her hair over and over again. [Y/N], soapy, turned around and stared at Coriolanus’ wet face and hair. Even when appearing like a drowned animal, his imposing figure was statuesque.
[Y/N] leaned up and kissed him quickly. “I’m sorry I forgot about the interview,” she whispered, barely louder than the shower water. She apologized more than he did, but he responded well to knowing someone other than him was in the wrong. “Do I really look like shit?”
Coriolanus sighed, more familiarly this time. He loved when she needed him. He would insult her all day long if it meant he got to give her more validation later on. “No,” he slipped a hand under her breast and gave it a squeeze, his thumb danced across her nipple. “No, you don’t,” His other hand wormed its way across her cheek to brush away that disgusting makeup residue from the night prior. “You just needed a little polish. Let’s finish up. Go get dressed. Coffee’s on in the kitchen.”
“You poison it?”
Coriolanus frowned exasperatedly. He reached the hand cupping her breast around to her ass and gave it a hard, wet smack. “You bitch.” He smirked.
Sins almost all forgiven.
—
Every time [Y/N] was in a car with Coriolanus, it felt like a coaching session. Hand on her thigh with, don’t say this, say that instead, let me speak first, don’t embarrass me.
No point in elaborating on the most familiar part of their normal day-to-day since it really was habit at this point. [Y/N] always ached to snap back at him after these times. One day, don’t embarrass me was going to hit so hard that she did.
When they got out of the car a few blocks from their destination, [Y/N] had dawned her bright purple sunglasses. Coriolanus hated them and had tried on multiple occasions to buy her new ones to no avail. The daylight was still too bright for her tired eyes, so they were going to be worn on the walk to Capitol News.
After half a block (and so close to a news building), they were swamped by people clicking away at them. It made the bright sun burn hotter. Coriolanus’ white blonde hair and intimidating stature was much too easy to pick out in a crowd for their sunglasses and long jackets to disguise much.
Right now, besides Games news, they were the hottest topic of discussion in the Capitol. Their engagement party had been wild, [Y/N] was typically wild, and Coriolanus was characteristically unwild. It made for good TV.
Coriolanus leaned in to whisper something. [Y/N] couldn’t hear it. All she could do was smile and tell any reporters with microphones ‘no thank you,’ or ‘you’ll have to watch Lucky’s to answer for that.’ Coriolanus merely smiled a smile that was not his smile and said ‘not now folks, we’ll be late,’ or ‘don’t worry about them, Darling.’
[Y/N] was leashed by Coriolanus’ hand on the back of her neck as he guided her through crowds. He had two dressbags of clothes for the show tossed effortlessly over his shoulder as they walked. They were a newsroom’s wetdream. She was exuberant and he was magnetic. And they were both trouble. Power, wealth, youth, stability and status. Everyone liked to watch them at their best and loved to watch them at their worst.
“How do you put up with it, Mr. Snow!” A bland-looking man with a microphone called.
“How was the party last night, [Y/N]!” Called another. They always called [Y/N] by her first name because, frankly, she was fairly certain they didn’t know her maiden name and technically she wasn’t Mrs. Snow yet either. Coriolanus’ grip on her tightened at the question.
She smirked at how the power of her own name took away power from her family and their name; the thing they desperately wanted a morsel of.
Considering a future where she inevitably became Mrs. Snow, she thought about how her lifetime of indiscretions would be tied to Coriolanus forever. She smirked wider at their folie a deux.
[Y/N] felt like a doll again, being pushed by Coriolanus like that. She didn’t hate it entirely, though. She liked it when he manhandled her a little. It helped with all the noise that surrounded them these days to be able to turn her brain off and let Coriolanus handle it for her. She would never admit it, but being a good doll for Coriolanus for the foreseeable future didn’t seem too bad. Her stomach churned wicked for thinking that. It made her antsy to not have an exciting retort in front of reporters. [Y/N] usually did, but her head ached too much this morning. Instead, she looked helplessly up at Coriolanus. He glanced down at her, an eyebrow raised. “Overwhelmed?” He asked quietly, but not too quietly. [Y/N] nodded. “Don’t worry, my dear. We’re almost there.” Coriolanus said like a good husband should. [Y/N] thought about how he was rarely such a good husband when other people weren’t looking. Then why had he seemed to care so much that morning? She must’ve been mistaken about one part or the other.
[Y/N] leaned up and kissed him for in part for his kindness. The crowd aww’d. Kisses were a good way to distract a man. Any man, receiving or watching. Coriolanus’ hand slipped down from her neck to the back of her waist. Her fingers went into the soft hair at the bottom of his neck. She felt him inhale sharply. She knew he hated that. “What was that for?” Coriolanus asked when he pulled away, referring to the kiss.
“Wanted to make sure you were real. None of this feels real.” [Y/N] laughed dizzily. It was true, but she felt stupid saying it. She had spent a lot of time feeling stupid recently and this morning was no exception. The hangover and the whirlwind of voices and flashes had emptied her brain completely. Coriolanus leaned in to whisper in her ear again. This time she caught what he said:
“Stop this. We’ve ten steps until we’re in the building. I’ve told you not to touch my hair.”
He pulled away from her and put on his brilliant, effortless smirk that rich boys his age always had. Coriolanus yanked [Y/N] the remaining distance into the news building.
As soon as they entered, they were whisked away to dress for that afternoon’s broadcast. [Y/N] was dropped into a beautician’s chair to make her face look like someone else’s. She groaned at the duty she held.
Makeup brushes and blowdryers and curling irons and spray bottles of who knows what clouded [Y/N] of vision.
She wished Coriolanus was in her immediate vicinity so she could glance over him and laugh cruelly about how stupid all this is. He was always good for a laugh at the expense of things like this.
“Honey, who does your hair on the regular? I suggest you switch to someone else.” The obscene-looking woman pulling her hair back asked.
[Y/N] laughed, but said nothing. [Y/N] wanted to strangle her.
Not long after that, [Y/N] was pulled up to her feet and forced into a dress that she at least knew she liked. Tight around the waist and thighs, capping off at the knees. It was higher necked, but was so tight that it left little to the imagination. She knew Coriolanus would get frustrated with a fluffy dress, so she picked one that would make his eyes bug out instead. It was off-white with a delicate floral pattern outlined in a brighter white.
[Y/N] looked great. She knew this as she admired the contrasting bulk of the shoulders and flowing sleeves with the clinging exposure of her curves everywhere else. She didn’t exactly look like herself, though. Especially with her hair and makeup done so precisely. She wasn’t precise, she was messy. Precise didn’t suit her.
[Y/N] wondered if the her that stared back in the full-body mirror was the real her now. Messy her was gone. A Capitol wife remained. A doll.
She slid her black ankle-breaking heels on and shook the thought away as she entered the sound stage.
[Y/N] always forgot how noble Coriolanus was capable of looking, considering he was distinctly the opposite. She stared at him. Mauve coat, black trousers, crisp white undershirt, white tie, white rose. Clearly, he had let someone touch his hair. Even if it was a stylist.
Coriolanus gestured for her to walk over to where he stood and Lucky sat. It was difficult to walk with the dress clinging around her knees and the height of her heels. Her short, intentional steps felt demeaning. Most things in her life felt vaguely demeaning, but she kept turning a purposeful blind eye. The stage lights were too bright. Coriolanus’ teeth were too white for the amount of throats he’d ripped out.
Capitol magic.
“Hello Darling. You look lovely.” Coriolanus said as she approached. He took his hand in her and kissed it. Coriolanus’ eyes never looked up at hers because they were too busy looking at how her body fit the dress.
“Thanks. You’re not so bad yourself,” she replied neutrally. “Hi Lucky. Green’s really your color.” [Y/N] lied. Lucky’s green, wintery tux was vile and everyone with eyes and a modicum of taste would see that.
Coriolanus coughed into his shoulder to cover a scoff. He wrapped a strong arm around [Y/N]’s waist.
“Thank you, [Y/N]! Good to see you, pleasantries, pleasantries, yada yada. Shall I call you [Y/N]
? Mrs. Snow
 The network doesn’t really know what the hell to do with you.” Lucky beamed from his chair.
“Oh, uh
 I’m not really Mrs. Snow yet. It’s not necessary. My first name will do. I’m not picky, though.”
She felt Coriolanus deflate a little beside her as he dropped her waist and folded himself into the gaudy patterned armchair the network provided. [Y/N] felt a sting of guilt. Maybe she should have let him carry on with the Mrs. Snow thing. Coriolanus would have to get over it. “Sure thing, hon. Anyway, go ahead. Take your seat. Some of these questions are tacky, tacky, tacky, but do your best and humor us. Panem wants to know the real you.” Lucky beamed.
“I’m sure they do.” They don’t. And they won’t.
“You kids really are
 Wow, lovely to share the stage with. You make me look old and sad comparatively, damn,” Lucky joked. “It’s been a good while since I’ve had the pleasure of sitting alongside Coriolanus like this. You were a child then. Crazy, the passage of time.” He continued.
“Lucky, it’s always an honor.” Coriolanus said. Coriolanus hated Lucky. [Y/N] marveled at his ability to lie so gracefully.
A group of production folks stepped out of the shadows to give them bottled water and let them know the show was about to begin. The studio audience poured in through side doors.
[Y/N] quickly leaned over to Coriolanus. “I thought this was a pre-tape.” She whispered frantically.
“You didn’t remember this interview existed three hours ago. You’ll deal with it.” He replied, with a note of his own panic he was unable to squash.
Fifteen minutes of seating and then a live camera inches away from [Y/N]’s face. “Well, we really thank you for having us on your show, Lucky.” She smiled. The audience analyzed them like vultures. This was the most wicked game designed for them, but Coriolanus didn’t lose. [Y/N] would have to be perfect.
“Of course! Always a pleasure, [Y/N]. Let’s get to some of these questions on my handy little list of questions, huh?” A few shallow questions about what designers they were wearing, what their morning routine was like to look so gorgeous, Coriolanus leaning over to hold [Y/N]’s hand across their chairs (the audience sighed lovingly). Coriolanus curls, stubborn as he was, fell out of the hold of the hairspray like they always did. She smirked and reached up with her left hand to push them out of his eyes. Oh, he hated that. [Y/N] could tell. Lovely.
“Oh, look at that ring,” Lucky said. “The ring we’ve all been talking about. Let’s get a closeup on that rock,” the camera pushed in to [Y/N]’s hand obediently. A large ruby mounted on a white gold band. She had been assured it was real. [Y/N]’s other jewelry, silver, sat patina-ing in a wooden box because of it.“Beautiful. Must’ve cost you a pretty penny, Coriolanus.”
“Yes, Coryo, how much did it cost?” [Y/N] asked. Coriolanus shifted in his seat. Money was not a thing Coriolanus discussed.
“A bit.” He replied stiffly. [Y/N] grinned.
“Uh, you both are mighty famous for that ring. I suppose it’s time to discuss that crazy engagement party. I was there to witness the whole thing firsthand, of course.”
The Snows-to-be nodded.
“These questions can get uncomfortable, but I’m sure you’ll answer all the same. So, your relationship seems
 Alarmingly happy today for two people debating splitting over infidelity at the celebration of their engagement.”
“Please, we only debate it when I’m drunk, Lucky.” [Y/N] said much to the audiences joy. They laughed heartily.
“Which is too often, if you want my opinion.” Another laugh from the audience for Coriolanus, never one for being outdone. She knew, in his mind, she deserved that.
“Rehabilitation is always an opinion.” Lucky joked darkly, not knowing what to say.
“Being wild is fun, though, isn’t it? I’m not from privilege and grace as much as my fiancĂ©. He’s always been elegant. I’m learning; I have a good teacher. But you only get your youth once. You would know, I’m sure, Lucky. When someone loves you as much as Coriolanus loves me
 He always forgives my mistakes. He’s too good me. He’s patient.” [Y/N] said. He was patient, but it came out in the way that he played the long game. His impulses along the way were markedly less patient. Coriolanus squeezed her hand tightly as a warning.
Lucky smiled bitterly. “Well, I’m sure he’ll learn to keep you on a shorter leash eventually. Actually, I hear you were out last night as well.”
Fuck.
“Yes, bachelorette party, you see.”
“The studio’s telling me,” Lucky clutched his earpiece. “They have some photos from your last wild night as an unwed woman.”
“Oh. Is that so
? Haha,” [Y/N] said. Coriolanus squeeze her hand until her own knuckles were white. Neither one of them had a clue what they were about to throw up on that screen. Coriolanus inhaled shakily, but maintained neutrality. “Can’t be worse than the sides you saw of us a few months back at the—“
It was worse.
The dress was short, but Coriolanus had known that when she stopped into his office to tell him she was going out. He had responded with a “That? Really? Okay
” with quiet anger that the dress wasn’t being worn for him.
Then there was the dreaded miniature morphling vile empty between her fingers. It was obvious she was trying to talk with her friends under the flashing lights. They were all wearing similar fare. Six or seven drunk, high young women pictured together wasn’t that bad, even for some of the old school Capitol prudes.
None was more damning than the strange man’s hand planted firmly on [Y/N]’s ass. His smile was too wide. The [Y/N]’s in the picture’s grimace at the stranger over her shoulder was uncomfortable. It screamed DON’T-TOUCH-ME. She looked like she was telling him to stop, but her eyes were wide and her lips were pulled into a frown. The subtext implied by the woman in the photo was Coriolanus is going to kill me. She sighed. The crowd gasped. Coriolanus inhaled sharply.
[Y/N] had said her behavior the night before was inherently not unfaithful. Coriolanus didn’t feel the need to not believe her since she was the one who brought it up. The apples of Coriolanus cheeks grew red with rage. The stranger’s smile was too big. He knew he was touching Coriolanus Snow’s fiancĂ©e. He knew was taking advantage of a helpless girl and her friends. He knew he was defacing someone else’s property.
Coriolanus Snow was going to find this man and ruin his life.
[Y/N], humiliated, looked over at Coriolanus. She had a hazy memory of telling some guy to “knock it off” the night before. Truly, she did remember this, but of course, she hadn’t thought this would be a big deal. This was a part of her life she had had to deal with since she was a young woman. This man’s action was undesired, but not unexpected. Taking in the photo and the look on his fiancĂ©e’s face as she shook her head slowly at him was enough for Coriolanus to determine that this touch was unwanted. [Y/N] looked guilty, but she had little reason to be. He hated seeing that look on her face in a situation he didn’t create.
[Y/N]’s only crime was going out without Coriolanus. She knew he hated when she did that. If he had been there, he would’ve handled the situation there and then. She was never going out alone again. She needed him. Right now, he was going to be the man she needed.
“Take that off the screen.” Coriolanus said firmly to Lucky.
“Well, first, let’s have—“ Lucky tried.
“I don’t think you heard me. I said take it down,” Coriolanus continued. He turned to the cameras and those behind them. “Now.”
Coriolanus watched a young woman at a screen immediately buckle at his demand and begin scrambling to pull the image. The show’s graphic was returned to the monitor. “Thank you,” Coriolanus said in the woman’s direction. [Y/N] stared at the floor, beet-red. She was trying not to cry, but what would it matter if she did? Coriolanus knew too well the meaning of her tell-tale sniffle and avoidant eye contact. He turned back to Lucky. “I think that was extremely rude of you and your production group to put up an image, without consent, of my fiancĂ©e getting touched without consent. It’s apparent to me from looking at that photo that my fiancĂ©e did not welcome that touch. Would you agree?”
“Possibly, but since the engagement party—“
“I think you forget I trust [Y/N]. Are you the one marrying her?”
“
 No. But hey, this is my show, kid. Let’s get back on track with—“
Coriolanus knew better than most people that what was said and done on live television was as good as forever. He would use that to his advantage. Nobody came for Coriolanus’ belongings and left with the hand that tried to snatch them.
“I’m not finished,” Coriolanus snapped. [Y/N] reached for Coriolanus’ hand again to signal that that’s enough, dear. He took it and looked over at her. He was angry; normal person righteous angry. Not manic, not cold. That was a new face. Coriolanus had so many pretend faces that clipped on and off. [Y/N] had previously thought she had seen them all. “Were you wanting that touch, Princess? Did you know him?” He asked [Y/N]. She shook her head with her eyes damp and downcast. “As I implied, you don’t know us. Don’t ever embarrass my fiancĂ©e like that,” or me, [Y/N] assumed his subtext as he spoke. “Whoever this moron in the picture is has another thing coming. What kind of self-respecting news network aims to humiliate guests for something they couldn’t help?” Coriolanus said. [Y/N]’s heart raced. He cared. Maybe it was for selfish reasons, but his support mattered. No one else was going to do it.
Sometimes he was absent, yes, but Coriolanus always came through when [Y/N] needed him. She was grateful that he wasn’t angry with her, even if that part came later in private. She was grateful for now that his way of easing his own pain eased hers too. She could get used to that. [Y/N] let out tears of temporary relief and reached for the box of tissues on the round table between guests and host.
Coriolanus stared Lucky down and settled himself further back in his seat with a sigh. “Next question?” The blonde man said.
—
The ride home was nearly silent. [Y/N] had started crying the second she sat down in the car. Coriolanus hadn’t say anything, but he kept his hand in hers the whole time. He didn’t even fight to let go when his palm got sweaty. [Y/N] pulled his hand close to her chest. She had done nothing wrong, yet she felt that everything was her fault. She had failed Coriolanus. This media wreck wasn’t just a game for photographers and journalists, this one embarrassed her genuinely. This one embarrassed Coriolanus and she was constantly told she was not supposed to do that. Don’t embarrass me rang against every corner in her brain.
The car stopped in front of their building. Coriolanus, as he always seemed to, opened her car door before the driver could get out. Coriolanus thanked the driver and put an arm around [Y/N] and led her up the stairs to their townhouse. The door closed behind them. Coriolanus locked the deadbolt with a heavy clunk. Safe from eyes that watched every failure with glee. They could be people again.
“I’m sorry, Coriolanus,” [Y/N] said, mascara down her cheeks. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t know him. Really, I didn’t. I told you this morning. I—I didn’t know him.” She backed herself protectively towards the couch and away from Coriolanus in learned preemptive panic.
“I know,” Coriolanus said. “Nobody but me gets to touch you like that. I know you’re smart enough to understand that. I cannot fathom how another man thinks he can do that to you and get away with it.”
“That’s
 That’s been happening my whole adult life, you can’t magically make that—“
“I don’t think you understand, Darling. I can. I don’t want to know that anyone has ever touched you like that. I swear on my mother’s grave. I will fucking murder them.” His winter blue eyes could vaporize a perpetrator on the spot.
“Coriolanus, that’s extreme.”
“Not to me. Not when you’re involved.”
“You can’t hurt people that looked at me funny. It’s hardly a crime.”
“Isn’t their some old line about not coveting another man’s wife?”
“
Yes. You have a future. You can’t interrupt your opportunities because some shithead—“
“It won’t interrupt anything. Wouldn’t it make you feel better to know that a creep like that was off the streets?”
“
Yes.”
“Well, then we agree. Don’t worry your pretty little head about it. Don’t you worry about a thing.”
[Y/N] blushed and looked down. “I’m sorry.” She didn’t know what else to say.
“Don’t be. I’m not angry with you about this. I know I can trust you. I do. You know I do. I don’t worry about that. I cannot trust other people around you, especially when you use that filthy drug,” Coriolanus said. He extend a hand to [Y/N] as he approached like he would approaching a scared animal. That hand went slowly to [Y/N]’s waist. Coriolanus pulled her in closer so they were chest to chest. “You are not going out without me to some party like that ever again. Disrespecting you like that means disrespecting me, too. I won’t stand for either.”
“I—“
Coriolanus was going to get what he wanted all along: [Y/N] alone with him always. How could she need anyone else? Everyone out there wanted to hurt her, touch her, make her feel bad about herself. Not Coriolanus. Perhaps, he should be thanking that man instead of cutting his fingers off one at a time. “No. Let me keep you safe. That’s all this is. I want you safe. I’m to be your husband. That’s my job. Won’t you let me do my job, [Y/N]?” He said too calmly. His blue eyes stared deep into hers. Coriolanus had a fantastic talent for telling someone something and letting them think it was a question; letting them think it was their idea— letting them they had a choice.
He was right. He did make her feel safe. Holding on to her like this made her melt. In Coriolanus’ arms, [Y/N] felt secure. He was moody, but Coriolanus was frustratingly reliable. He wanted to make himself the bedrock of [Y/N]’s life. She had no choice but to allow him that. [Y/N] breathed out and he felt her breath fan out across his face. “Let me take care of you. I won’t let that happen to you anymore. I promise.” Coriolanus muttered.
He tipped his mouth slowly into her neck and hungrily sucked at the place below her ear. A gasp caught in [Y/N]’s throat at the surprise sensation. Her knees wobbled and her dress and shoes didn’t make it any better. She put her arms around his neck for support. “Coriolanus
” she whispered. Coriolanus loved the vibration in her throat beneath his lips.
Helplessly, [Y/N] tipped her head back to give her fiancĂ© what he wanted. Coriolanus had sucked a few hickeys on her neck and chest before, sure. Never before had he bitten her. This time, he bit her hard enough to bruise and scab. It was harder to cover an indent with makeup than a simple bruise. If she were to go out even to the grocery store, other men had to understand that [Y/N] was off the market. If an engagement ring wouldn’t do it, this would. Coriolanus bit her with such force that the tears started to well again.
The position they were in felt like a dance. His hands on her waist, hers on his neck, their bodies flush together. [Y/N] fell deeper into the black hole of Coriolanus Snow. This must have been on purpose. He knew she loved to dance with him and made it a weapon. Damn him. She would always say yes to a dance, wouldn’t she? Wasn’t this whole relationship just a fucked up dance?
The man reached one hand down and pulled up [Y/N]’s dress as much as he could get it up and tore it the rest of the way. [Y/N] could swear she had been torn out of a third of her clothing recently. Coriolanus pushed her panties to the side and pushed his fingers into her. It would have hurt if she hadn’t been so wet to begin with. She bobbled on her heels. Once Coriolanus has pumped himself fingertip to hand in and out of her a handful of times, [Y/N] was holding herself up entirely by his neck and shoulders and the fingers that impaled her tenderly. Coriolanus had complete control over the situation. The only thing left for her to do was moan and she didn’t hold back.
Coriolanus was unrelenting. He marked a disturbing black and blue column on her throat the way he liked. Slowly, the pair rocked back and forth from foot to foot, as Coriolanus nipped, fucked and sucked. A fucked-up slow dance to the song of the traffic on the other side of the window.
MORE FROM THE TRUCULENT SERIES
TAGLIST:
@badwicht @stelleduarte @cinnamongirl127 @prettyppetty @soulessien @bejeweledreverie @jjstyles @arminsarlerts @chmpgneprblem @co1dmountains @miscellaneousmoonchild @lille999 @pumkinnxsmut @taykorsyogurt @ndycrls @watermelonharry @nananarwhal @ohantonia @catlover420sstuff @justaproudslytherpuff @notarabellasstuff @scarytiger111 @zucchinimalfoy @secretsicanthideanymore @h-l-vlovesvintage @dannydevsbbg @clintsupremacy @lookclosernow @10ava01 @or-was-it-just-a-dream @lucielsstuff @fairyydvst @spencereidbasis @a-mellifluous-life @daenerysqueenofhearts @heavqn @dangelnleif @lapisthelovely @wotcherpeak @24kmar
apologies as always for the little tags that couldn’t.
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theotherbuckley · 3 months ago
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a thousand ways to call you mine BONUS CHAPTER
bucktommy | Chapter 3/3 | 1.6K/14.2K | Rated E
For @bucktommypositivityweek nicknames and terms of endearment 💜
Pet names +1 +1 husbands (read on ao3)
Wrapped up in the love of his life’s arms is exactly where Tommy wants to be forever.
He didn’t really think this would ever be a real possibility for him.
Tommy had grown up with a dad who made it clear that he wouldn’t tolerate anything less than a perfectly masculine, woman-loving man. And so that’s what he became.
He pushed down any other feelings he had, squashed them deep down into the depths of his mind until he was sure they couldn't escape.
Every time he’d find a guy attractive, he’d tell himself it was their feminine features that drew him in. It didn’t matter that half the time, they were massive, built like a Greek god, men. He didn’t let himself think about it any more than that. Maybe he was just jealous of them. He repeated that like an oath.
He joined the army because his dad wanted him to — and Tommy wanted nothing more than to make him proud. He did well in the army, he followed orders like a good little soldier. He learnt to fly helicopters, something that would become a place of solace.
He always felt in control as a pilot. The one place where he could be himself without any expectation. Where it wasn’t others' rules that dictated his actions. Just him, in the air, a place where he could breathe.
When he became a firefighter, he found a crew that felt so much like his family at home. He understood how to behave there, he didn’t mess up like he had done so many times with his dad. He knew the unwritten rules. He played his part no matter how many times that little voice inside him told him he was a liar, a hypocrite.
It wasn’t until he was back in his element, flying aircrafts with people who respected each other, that he finally managed to unlearn every piece of hatred that had been engrained so deeply inside of him since he was old enough to understand what it meant.
And then he met Evan. Evan wasn’t his first boyfriend, but that didn’t matter. He was everything in the end.
Evan introduced himself, stumbling over his own name in a way that Tommy found far too cute for the impending emergency they had at hand. He didn’t dwell on it at the time, but he was comfortable enough with himself to be able to look and appreciate the man without hating the thoughts that swirled around his mind like he once had.
What he saw was a gorgeous man who said the most outlandish but well-meant things. Someone who loved so strongly. Someone brave and kind, who blushed so brightly at any compliment. 
He never anticipated that after that, he would end up here — holding that beautiful man in his arms, able to call him his. 
Evan fits in his arms like he was made for them. Okay, maybe it takes a lot of shuffling around for a massive firefighter and pilot to sit comfortably together. It didn’t matter, though, it always felt so right. 
They’re sitting in a hotel bed, lazily drawing lines on each other’s skin with their fingers, smiling up at each other every time the light catches on the silver bands adorned on their ring fingers.
“I love you,” Evan whispers, as though speaking any louder would break the precious bubble they’ve created for themselves.
“I love you, too, husband,” Tommy replies, shooting Evan his signature smile, his eyes scrunching up in the corners. Evan raises his hand to Tommy’s face, fingers trailing the soft lines etched there.
continue reading or read on ao3
“I love you,” Evan says again, he can’t seem to stop saying it, hasn’t been able to stop since the ceremony. Tommy isn’t complaining. He feels it, too. He feels the way his heart wants to burst from his chest because of the magnitude of love contained inside. The way he needs to repeat his love for his husband over and over again just to keep his heart in check.
Tommy presses a gentle kiss to Evan’s curls, a move that always has Evan melting into his hold. “I love you, too,” he says back, just because he can.
“I never imagined having a husband,” Evan says, staring at the ring on his finger like it contains all the secrets in the world. 
“Neither did I,” Tommy admits. “But I’m so happy I got to have one. Got to have you.”
Evan shuffles even closer to his body if that’s even possible with the way they’re pressed up against each other, but he tries anyway — tries to merge their atoms together until there’s no telling where one ends and the other begins. 
He kisses right above Tommy’s peck before staring back up at him, smiling lazily, a faint blush dusting his cheeks.
Tommy doesn’t think he’ll ever get over this look. His husband’s curls, free and slightly dishevelled, perfect for running his fingers through. He’ll never get over his husband’s rosy red cheeks and bright eyes filled with awe and love. The blooming love bites adorning his smooth skin, evidence of their well-spent honeymoon. The silver ring, engraved on the inside with a simple yours because that’s what they are — inexplicably each others. Each others to love and to cherish. For as long as they each shall live.
“What are you thinking about?” Evan asks, his fingers running down the groves of his chest.
“You,” Tommy says. Always you.
Evan shoots him his award-winning smile, the one that makes his eyes shine. Love so clearly evident within the blue pools of his irises.
“Yeah?” Evan asks.
“Yeah, baby. Just thinking how lucky I am to call you mine.”
“Mmm, yours,” Evan agrees, rolling himself fully onto Tommy's body as he kisses down his neck. Sucking every inch of skin available like he’s starved for it. 
Tommy lets him take his fill, wrapping his arms around Evan’s back and holding him close so that not even an inch separates them. Tommy’s hips jerk when his husband bites at the sensitive region behind his ear. The movement makes Evan laugh. The soft chuckle filling the air with warmth and love. Tommy loves that sound. He wishes he could bottle it up and store it for later to listen to whenever he needs it.
He doesn’t have to, though, because Evan’s not going anywhere.
“Come here,” Tommy says as if they’re not practically glued together already. Evan, always on the same wavelength, understands him anyway.
He lifts his head from the groove of his neck to hover in front of his face.
Their lips move to each other like magnets until they meet in a kiss. Tommy opens his mouth, lets Buck’s tongue explore inside like he hasn’t already spent many months mapping it out. 
Tommy grips Buck’s hips tighter, pulling him flush against himself until their groins meet, electricity rushing through his gut. Tommy swallows down the moan Evan lets out at the action, smiling into the kiss as he rolls them over until his husband is lying on his back.
Evan pulls back, panting, squirming on the bed as he seeks the delicious friction. Tommy gives him what he needs, rutting leisurely against him until they’re both groaning into each other's mouths. 
They’re barely kissing anymore, but neither is complaining, content to trade breaths like they need it to live. Tommy thinks that maybe he does.
Tommy licks his palm, too lazy to reach for the lube sitting on the bedside table. He reaches down to grasp both of them in his hands, jerking them slowly, like they have all the time in the world. They do, of course. Right now, there’s nobody but them; they’re just two men trying their damnedest to become one.
Evan whimpers when Tommy’s thumb brushes over his slit, collecting the precome gathered there, his hips bucking further into Tommy’s large hands.
It doesn’t take long for the both of them to get close. Tommy speeds up his movements, erratically jerking them to the finish line. Evan lifts his legs to wrap around Tommy’s back, desperately trying to press himself even closer. His fingers dig into Tommy’s back, no doubt leaving indents in the skin. Tommy’s not one to complain, he wants the world to know that he’s taken, married to someone he never dared to dream he could have.
“I love you, husband,” Tommy breathes between open-mouthed kisses.
“I love you, husband,” Evan repeats, like a prayer. 
That's all either needs to send them over the edge, come shooting onto their stomachs, marking each other as their own. Evan goes boneless, dropping his arms and melting into the mattress. Tommy feels much the same, dropping onto Evan’s chest, their come sticky between them, but neither cares too much at that moment.
Evan lets out an “oomph” as Tommy rests his weight on him, but he doesn’t tell him to move, craving the feel of his partner in every way he can have him. They stay like that for a while, neither in a rush to move. 
“What was the point of me coming up with pet names when husband was a possibility all along?” Evan says after a moment.
Tommy can’t contain his laughter, tucking his head into his husband’s neck as he shakes with the force of his laugh. 
“I don’t know, husband,” Tommy says with a wink. “But it was a lot of fun.”
“Mmm, it really was, husband.”
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hiskillingjar · 9 months ago
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hello! what kind of reactions do you think the btd characters might have to a normally very serious and aloof mc suddenly breaking down and becoming clingy and needy? btw i loooooooove the way you characterize strade 💗💗💗💗💗
thank you! i love writing him so i'm glad others love it too :3
ren 🩊
i, ah- 💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕 !!!!!!!!
of course ren would love it. of course he would!
he was so nervous about you being so aloof and distant the first couple of weeks, after all...maybe he wondered if all of this was even worth it :(
but the second you started acting clingy and needy around him, he would go fucking INSANE he would be so so happy
granted he might be a little "đŸ€š" at first, wondering if you were trying to manipulate him. so he'd for sure give it a day or two just to be sure
maybe he'd expect you to prove just how much you need him...maybe a couple of nights in the basement by yourself would do you good, anyway...
but then he wouldn't be able to stop himself from getting just as clingy and needy with you too, so you're just a couple of codependent loved up sweethearts aw!
i'm sure nothing bad will happen there!
law đŸ„€
i mean law kind of is the aloof and distant one so...they would probably think the attitude change is a little strange
like, why are you behaving this way now? you've been fine for days, you shouldn't be behaving like this...i have to go to work, let go of me...settle down...
they'd take a couple of days to get used to it, for sure, and might even be a little annoyed and short with you in the meantime
but slowly...slowly...
they'd like the way you cling so tightly to them when you slept, and how much you'd grown accustomed to sitting around in their flat all day while they were out without a word of complaint
you get so happy and excited when they come home too...it's a lot easier to read your emotions when you're like this and they can't deny it's kind of nice to have someone so happy to come home to
and the fact that you're so needy, you let them get away with a lot more...gone for days at a time, that's okay, just come home to me, please! leaving behind a couple of bruises when you have sex, that's okay, you didn't mean it!
maybe they'd want to make you even needier...dependent, almost
strade 🔹
girl. come on.
why are you giving this man any degree of leverage over you
you just KNOW he is going to do the worst possible thing with this
he'd expect you to prove just how needy you really are, and how much you really wanted him. i mean, you go from being aloof and bitchy to totally desperate in an instant, how could he NOT want some kind of proof that it's genuine?
and then he'd find it absolutely hilarious.
you're still so needy after everything i do to you, really? haha, how cute! i really thought you'd be smarter than that <3
he'd definitely soak in it for a little while and just. totally let his ego swim in how much you need him
it's hard for a guy to resist someone being dependent on them...or at least that's what he tells himself
he would then start to use it against you, just to see you get all worked up and upset...and easier to play with
you let him get away with so much, after all, how far can he push that until you're doing everything you can to get away from him?
and he loves pushing you as hard as he can, after all
he's never been that good at resisting you...
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theblueflower05 · 2 years ago
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The Sweetest Sylaung
A/N: So I def didn’t mean to write a novel long Neteyam smut story but here we are. Debating on making this a mini series. Also the anon that requested a “curvy” reader insert- here ya go!(she’s also an Augustine- buttttt you can only see that if you squint lol)
Word Count: 6k+
Warnings: This is smut. Pure smut. Please don’t read if it is not your jam. You are in charge of cultivating your own online experience, you’ve been warned!
Pairing: Aged Up! Neteyam x Human!Curvy!Reader
Summary: After an “accidental” romp in the forest, you do your best to avoid Neteyam. It’s for everyone’s good, or so you’ve convinced yourself.
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“I’m begging for you to take my hand, wreck my plans. That’s my man”- Willow, Taylor Swift
The kaleidoscope of colors explode under your eyes in endless patterns and shapes as you look over the sample of Pandora flora under the heavy duty microscope. This particular piece of the Moons terra had never been discovered before, only blooming at what you estimated to be every ten or so years, under the right monsoon like conditions
At least that’s what you had discovered so far.
The flower, which sprouted into a berry, and then dissipated into a moss like cluster of microorganisms all within its short life cycle had turned into your passion project. You we’re doing your thesis on it, the last step in getting your Masters.
You’d gone through schooling on a computer screen, guided by the greatest minds on Earth that had relocated to Pandora. Scientists of all fields who you’d grown up around. None of them had been surprised when you’d picked up botany. Xenobotany to be exact.
It was in your blood.
The desk your at shakes violently- disturbing your precision like focus. Breaking you straight out of your zone.
“Ugh” you groan, frustrated, raising your head, eyes narrowing at the culprits.
Spider, Lo’ak and Kiri freeze like deers in the headlights of your fury. Spiders arm raised, a wad of paper balled up in his hand, aimed to shoot. He lowers it slowly as the weight of your your heavy gaze zero’s in.
“Sorry, cu-”
“I told you guys, if you cant behave to get the fuck out” You seethe. Your nerves are paper thin anyway. Too much screen time frying your brain something fierce as you focused in on your studies. “Is that not what I said, verbatim?”
“You need to chill. You’ve been so high strung lately. Come hang out with us” Lo’ak suggests smooth and unhelpful. As usual. “When was the last time you left the lab?”
You roll your eyes and bite your tongue, trying not to say anything to scalding to the surprisingly sensitive Sully brother. “No thanks. I’ve gotta focus”
“Maybe Lo’aks right” Kiri starts, her face screwing up as she speaks “Eywa that sounds wrong. Nevermind, My brother is never right- but you should come hang out with us. Let’s go swimming- the watering hole is over flowing from the storms”
The deep sigh through your nose isn't calming, even though you pretend it is. You know they mean well, in the most annoying way. That you’d been buried in books and paperwork in the lab for the past couple months.
Hiding from the outside world within the thick walls of Hell’s Gate.
“Can’t. This is important, Kir- but why don’t you guys head down there? Its closer to Home Tree and its almost curfew anyway” two birds, one stone. Its a smart suggestion- but Kiri’s face falls, shoulders sagging and ears lowing. That look had always gotten you-
“I cant today, but maybe tomorrow? The samples are too fresh and I don't want to put them on ice
But I think Max made those Yovo cookie things” That’s only half of the truth, but luckily Kiri’s always been understanding.
She grabs your elbow in her long fingers and tugs you along.
The mess hall had seen better days, but the large open space still tends to be the meeting ground for the humans that were allowed to stay and inhabit the moon. With twelve foot tall ceilings and airtight exits and windows that lead out to the Avatar Program training yards. Its a common room of sorts, a place where everyone gathers. For meals, for mismatched Holidays. But mostly for gossip.
I mean, what else is there to do?
Like currently, you’re deeply engrossed in the story that Doctor Martinez’s, Xeno-Zoologist is recounting. All dramatics and dirty intimate details “It’s true, they’re gonna bring it before Mo’at and everything”
He’s talking about Trevino and Eital’i.
Everyone had heard the whispers, seen the not so subtle signs. The main Radio Tower operator had turned during the resistance, had fought beside Jake and had been allowed to stay on Pandora- better stuck on a foreign planet then thrown in a familiar jail cell. Trevino’s a cool guy, really.
A cool guy who had been sleeping with a Na’vi woman, apparently. The two had kept it under wraps, really private. No one could pin down how or when it happened,,,but to go to the clan’s Tsahik seeking a mating blessing? That’s major.
“You’re lying” you accuse in a gasp as the table breaks into whispers, all wide eyes and shaking heads. “They’re going to mate?...How?”
“It’s not like it hasn't happened before” Another scientist chimes in casually. Like it’s a known thing.
Which it kind of is.
Taboo, yes. But not unheard of, more like untalked about.
Humans and the Na’vi of the forest had lived in close quarters since the overthrow of the RDA. Jake, the standing Olo’eyktan, just had a little too much homosapien in him. Yeah, he’d survived the soul transfer and fully inhabited his blue body- but he never quite grew out of his human roots.
It had been hard, lots of politicking and good grace shown on both parts, but somehow, like all biomes in the vast perma green forest, all had learned to live in harmony. Most Omitikaya kept their distance. Very hesitant about the human presence. They had every right to be scared, hostile. Scarred by man and its weapons and its destruction.
Others had been raised in close proximity to Grace’s school. Had become accustomed to the nearly two decade long human presence on Pandora. Curious and accepting.
You’d heard about interspecies hookups.
Locker room talks that left your ears burning and your heart racing. It usually came from members of the Avatar Program- It tends to set a precedent, when the quote on quote “royal family” of the Omiticaya is a Jarhead and a native woman.
Na’vi are gorgeous, tall and lean but humanoid enough to be familiar
you’re not exactly sure what they see in humans but you know damn well what you guys see in them.
“How do you think that works? The
physicality of it all I mean. Trevino doesn't have an Avatar. How do they fuck-”
You’re not the only one zoning out from the conversation and it’s lewd turn.
You watch Kiri watch Spider and your heart aches for her. What they have is secret, delicate and forbidden. As a woman with high standing in the clan, you knew that her feelings for the boy wouldn't go anywhere. Couldn't.
When they we’re kids, it was cute. Now that they 're both technically adults, it was just plain stupid.
You tell her of the fact, often.
Kiri tells you to stop projecting.
———
The Sully Kid’s are always late. It’s like no matter how hard they try, they cant make curfew. You throw on an Exopack, hurrying them to the fence.
“Yeah, yeah okay mom. Take it easy” Lo’ak shrugs huffily as you yank hard on his arm. “I’m going, Y/N!”
“Not fast enough you strumbeast’s ass! You’re gonna get me into trouble, who do you think your dad’s gonna blame when you guys end up back at Home Tree super late again? Norm chewed me out for that shit last time!” You man handle the much taller than you alien.
Kiri and Spider a few leagues in front of you, already at the mouth of the giant fence. They’re awkward, not in their usual synched steps. You wonder how much of that conversation earlier had gone to their heads?
You’re bickering with Lo’ak, an extremely normal occurrence. He can be a real douche. and had been kind of insufferable lately. You think its nerves about his impending Iknamaya.
So engrossed with getting them on their way home that you don't even notice him until it’s too late.
Neteyam is a skilled hunter, through and through. The youngest in the clan to ever make a kill. Swift and quiet. Beloved.
But around you he feels out of his element. Clunky and awkward, no matter how hard he tries to play it off its like you can see right through him. Its scary and thrilling, sets his stomach alive with butterflies everytime. This is no different.
Showing up to Hell’s Gate to retrieve his siblings was something he had done since he was a child.
He’d used to bleed hours away playing with them at the scientists fortress, but as he had gotten older and his responsibilities had grown heavier- he had little time for it. Still, when ever his parents would send him out on a one man search party to bring them home, he’d jump at the chance.
At the hope of seeing you.
You’re arguing with his little brother, trying not to laugh at something he said and Neteyam knows. He knows he shouldn't feel jealous but he just cant help it. Cant help the acidic twist of his insides.
Especially when he chirps out his family's familiar call, letting his presence be known.
And watches that pretty smile fall right off of your face.
“You’re late, as usual” His voice has a stern edge. It’s annoying, the role he has to play. Kiri is a woman grown, Lo’ak just weeks away from being the same. He doesnt blame them for the way their feathers bristle, almost viscerally.
“Ah, big brother you didn't have to come all this way to get us” Kiri reassures, patting Neteyam on the chest good naturedly. “We we’re just about to be on our way”
Neteyam notices the way you try to look anywhere else but him. It stings because he cant stop looking at you, cant pry his eyes away from your form.
“You all should start heading back before dad notices” Neteyam starts. His father had been busy as of late, harvest season abundant and fruitful this year because of the heavy rain season “I’ll catch up, I need to speak with Norm”
“What? Dad cant use the coms now, he has to send his messenger” Lo’ak’s nose scrunches a little, always questioning. On a normal day it wouldn't affect Neteyam so much, just a normal jab from his snot nosed little brother.
Not today. Not when he’s stretched so thin. Not when you refuse to look at him but are staring at the side of Lo’ak fat head. It feels wrong, makes his skin heat up to the point that it feels itchy and tight.
“That's none of your concern. Head back to Home Tree. Now” He doesn't normally throw his weight around. But he feels the need to puff up big in front of you “Those are orders. Get out of here”
Lo’ak’s less offended and more surprised. One of his oh so human eyebrows cocks, a sly remark in his throat before he scoffs. “Aye, Aye Captain Kiss Ass. C’mon Kiri let's go. See you later Spider, Y/N”
He deuces up Spider, gives Y/N a pat on her small shoulder and glares harshly at his brother before he disappears into the thick brush of the jungle.
Kiri wraps her arms around you in a strong hug, muttering about ‘swimming’ and ‘promises’. The small impish smile she shoots Spider gives YOU butterflies so you don't blame the way he swoons, before she’s off behind her younger brother.
“I can go find Norm for you, bro. I think he’s still out in his Avv, but Max can radio him back in” Spider is none the wiser. Doesn't notice the heavy tension that simmers on a low bubble. Oblivious, as usual.
“Yeah, sure” Neteyam replies, barely sparing the human boy a glance. He’d feel bad for it later, when he could form coherent thought. When his brain wasn't on Y/N issued override.
Spider chatters, good natured. He never got to see the Olo’eyktan in training anymore. He missed his homie.
“Well, I should be heading back. You guys have a good rest of your night-” You’re already turning on your heels when you make the announcement, eager to get back inside. Back behind the safe walls of the lab- far away from Neteyam.
“No”
Neteyam who stares at you with all too knowing eyes. He looks straight through you like he can see through your clothes, through your thinly veiled escapism attempts. He reaches out, wraps his long fingers around the top of your arm and tugs you back to him. Gentle, but very firm.
He doesn't have to say it- it’s written all over his face. Not this time. He’s not going to let you run away from him.
“Netey-” You start in a whine, tugging on his hold. He doesnt relent, if anything his fingers tighten as his eyes narrow. Dangerous, desperate.
“Just talk to me” it’s a barely concealed plea, his tail twitches anxiously behind him “I'm just asking for five minutes. Please Y/N”
Spiders oblivious, yes. Stupid? No. He doesnt know exactly what's going on between the two of you but has clued into the fact that it’s heavy and he wants no part of it.
The excuse he makes is shit- he’ll just go find Norm. Yeah
 he’s so out of there.
“What is wrong with you?” You hiss as you watch Spiders awkward, quick retreating form. Eyes flickering over the empty for now training yards “So much for keeping it lowkey, huh? Could you be anymore obvious?”
“What’s wrong with me?” Neteyam is almost shaking with disbelief “What the fuck is wrong with you? You havent talked to me in over a month. Everytime I make any kind of attempt you bolt. I dont-” He sighs, pinching the wide bridge of his nose with the hand that isnt holding onto you.
He looks tortured. Tired. Run a little ragged.
Beautiful.
“I don't know what I did? If this is about that day in the forest-”
You sigh at his words, once again pulling on his hold. Shaking your head desperately because you can't.
You can't talk about it. Fuck, you’ve been trying not to even think about it.
And failing as you replay the event over and over again the darkness of your bunk. Hyper fixating on the way that his lips had felt against yours. Oh the way that his big hands had worked your body over
“Don’t” you whisper “Please don’t”
You’d never been one to beg for pity, for mercy but that’s what you do now. Beg him to let you out of his tight clutches. Metaphorically and physically.
“You’re all I can think about” It's a gutted admittance, but Neteyam makes it all the same “That night- I can’t sleep. I can barely eat- I’m falling behind on my duties because I keep coming back here. Standing outside this fence and waiting for you. I know you could hear me over the coms, right?”
And you could, a few weeks or so ago.
When he’d begged you to come out. To come speak to him. His voice so appealing that you’d almost caved. You’d had to turn off your receiver. Had sat with your head in your hands for hours as you fought the urge to crawl to him, knees raw and your bloody heart on a platter only he could divulge in.
He shuffles closer, all lean strong muscle. Firm, unmovable. “You heard me”
“Of course I did”
“And you still left me out here” He scoffs, head shaking slightly as his adams apple bobs, his ears are pinned to the sides of his head in obvious distress “I could never do that shit to you.”
“One of us needs to be the adult in this situation” Your voice is as strong as you can make it. Trying to speak reason on to both of you “We can pretend it never happened and go back to the way that things were before. You’re my friend, Tey”
You reach up, stroking at his wrist. Trying to soften him enough for him to let this go. Let you go.
He’s trying to control his breathing, all that training for all of those years for what? One fragile human girl to make him completely unspool? To lose any and all composure he’d worked so hard to gain.
He was always the adult, in all situations. Had been born with a neck cramping crown on his head. Shrouded in pressurized glory.
“If this is me being childish, so be it. Where has pretending gotten you, huh? Look at you, yawntutsyìp. you look so tired. When was the last time you slept? Kiri says you spend days in the lab without resting”
His hands, both of them, come up to cup your face. Huge and calloused. Yet he holds you like you're something precious. A small animal, a rare gem. His whole entire world since he was just a boy.
Neteyam thumbs at the cool glass of your mask, tenderly. The bags under your eyes are sunken and bruised. “Don’t shut me out”
Your body, in its entirety, clenches at his words. Velvet and sincere. He’s a fucking dream. Your head leans into his hands, neck sagging of its own accord as any and all words of protest leave your weak mind.
He makes you so easy.
“Let me in
I dont want there to be this distance between us anymore” He hisses around the word distance. Hating even having to say it “I want to be inside of you again”
Your plump lower lip gets skewered between your teeth, eyes screwed shut as you remember the last time. Your first ever time being full
you’d dreamt of it every night since it had happened.
If it wasn't for the blasted mask and your need for Earth’s oxygen he’d kiss you. Right here right now. He didn't really give a shit who saw or what they had to say.
Instead pulls you into his chest, lets you wind your arms around his lean middle and bury your chest in his diaphragm. Its as close as he can get you, for now. Makes you cling to him the way that he’d clung to every thought of you for the last weeks.
You wish it was lungfuls of his skin that you were taking as you try to bring yourself down from this abrupt shaky high. You dont get it, how your relationship couldve flipped this hard in such a short time.
He had always just been Neteyam. A shameless flirt yes- but that’s all it was.
“Would you like that?” He questions, hands working through your hair. Fingers light and soothing on your scalp. Massaging the thoughts right out of your head.
“Hmm?”
“If I was inside you again?” He presses on. You can feel the tickle of his long, thin, tail as it wraps around the back of your calf and you groan, digging your nails into his back.
“You’re such an asshole. Stoppppp it” You’re embarrassed and turned on and already feel stupid enough, he doesn't need to rub it in. His chest shakes as he chuckles.
“I’m serious. Tell me you want it-”
“Neteyam! Hey!”
The two of you break apart in an instant. You jump away from him as though struck by lightning. Instantly putting enough distance between you and the Na’vi that maybe, just maybe an onlooker might think that the embrace was friendly.
It’s Norm, having heard that the eldest Sully was looking for him he’d come eagerly.
The smile you plaster on is forced and honestly, Neteyam doesnt fair any better. He’s obviously flustered, just glad that his erection isn't tenting his tweng.
“Spider told me you and your dad are looking for me. I’m not intruding on uh anything, am I?” Norm looks between the two of you.
Your arms are folded tightly over your chest and Neteyam is rubbing at the back of his neck, strong jaw flexing as his teeth grind.
Oh yeah, Norm had definitely interrupted something.
Knows for sure as you scurry away. As Neteyam, always so level headed, has to string together words. Stumbling a little bit as he tries to remember the message that Jake had relayed.
It’s not any of his business, he thinks at the time. He sure didnt want to be the one to shine the light on whatever the hell was going on here. Turning a blind eye to the mysteries of Pandora is the only way to survive the harshest terrain known to man.
———
You dont know that though-
No, you’re spiraling more a little bit as you prepare yourself for bed. Brushing through your thick hair and staring out into space as your mind assaults you with all of the gnarly ‘What If’s’
Norm had seen and he had to know right? Oh god, what if he told Jake?
You balk. Lowering the brush as your eyes bulge out of your head.
What if he told Neytiri?
That's actually a super horrific thought. Like nightmarish. You have a lot of respect for the future Tsahik...

And a very healthy does of fear. She didnt like humans and made it known. She tolerated them only for her husband's benefit. What if she found out that her eldest son, her golden boy, had fucked one?
You’re freak out is interrupted by static, by the beeping of your com receiver on your night stand.
“Y/N?” its Neteyams muffled voice through the device. You’d ignored it once. You should ignore it again

“Yeah?” you wonder if he picks up on how shaky you sound through the receiver.
“Tomorrow night meet me at the East Gate. Like when we we’re kids” he’s not really asking. Not demanding either. You could ignore him again, but he has to try.
The line goes silent, quiet for minutes on end.
“Y/N?”
You’re so stupid. “What time?”
You can hear the grin he’s sporting as he replies “0100”
“Got it, over. Good night, Neteyam. Go to sleep”
———
The East Bay is on the other side of the large fortress-like building. It's not that it's forbidden, or anything. but it is deserted. It’s where the military personnel had inhabited, and since most if not all of them had gotten the hard boot off Pandora it was empty as a ghost town in these maze like halls.
When you we’re younger; you’d caught Spider sneaking Kiri and Lo’ak in through the rarely used entrance. You’d demanded the know how, if he didnt want you to rat on him for it. It was a rare occurrence, but the Sully children had all been snuck into Hell’s Gate this way over the years.
You type in the codes, disabling the alarm system in order to usher Neteyam into the pressurized, air lock. You’d toted one of the Avatar Exopacks along for him, they’re heavier then hell but he’d need it.
“Hi” you smile, suddenly shy as the tall Na’vi man stands before you.
That's what he was now. A man, not only in the eyes of his people but as a whole. Broad and muscular, strong. Verile. The next leader of his people. You know that he’s highly desired in his clan. Women fawn over him. Vie for his attention.
It doesnt feel real that he wants to give it to you.
You’re nothing special. Not tall and stunning like the Omaticaya women. Even by Earth’s standards you're short, curvy. Not particularly pretty. Insecurity gnaws at you, as it so often does.
“C’mere” Neteyam urges, boldly yanking you by your waist. Pulling you flush against his body. Grabby and insistent, he wants to feel your bare skin. All plush and soft, hes been dying to taste it since the last time.
Kicking himself over and over for not savoring every bit of your body that you gave to him. He won't make the same mistake again.
He’s not gonna lie, the concrete and metal of the walls inside of Hell’s Gate have always made him a little claustrophobic. But he can't do this outside-
His lips capture yours, demanding and needy from the jump. Big, over powering, he swallows your little chirp of surprise. Devours any and all breath from your lungs. Its messy and so good. You hadn't gotten to kiss him last time.
His mouth tastes amazing, his tongue rough in texture just like you remembered. It grates your lips as you suck on it-
“Hey, slow down a little bit” You giggle as Neteyam paws at your ass, lifting you off the ground until you squirm hard, making him release you “Not here, we can't do this here there’s cameras everywhere”
“I don't care” Neteyam pecks all over your face, trying to recapture your mouth as you avoid him “Let them watch, most of those pervs would like it”
And they would know that you’re his. The thought is beyond heady.
You gasp as his sharp canines ghost over the delicate skin of your neck, nibbling on your pulse point “Please- Neteyam”
You firmly push him away, hand on his chest and maybe if you hadn't cut him off cold turkey he would've given you space. Could've pulled away for a moment to let you say your piece. Instead the idea of letting you pull away even an inch is unbearable to him.
No. instead he tosses you over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. He hauls loads heavier then you every day, your protests mean little to him. With his free hand he scoops up the Avv Exo Tank,
“Where to, yawntutsyìp?”
Where too is an old conference room. Its as good as any, and Neteyam yanks a couple cushions off the old couch to act as a brace for your head as he lowers you to the floor, flat on your back.
You’re so pretty like this, he tells you of the fact.
With your hair a mess behind you, your face free of that damned mask. Grinning up at him as you rub your thighs together. He wishes he had that camera that his dad liked to take pictures on. He wants this moment of you framed, immortalized.
“I hate sky people clothes” He mutters as he tugs on the hem of your t-shirt. It hides you, hides all that skin he craves.
“You want me to take it off?” You offer eagerly, raising up enough to start peeling the piece of clothing off. You’re bare underneath, completely. Your breasts jiggle as they’re freed, nipples peaked in the cool air-conditioned air.
“Don’t ever put it on again” He demands, taking it from your hands and tossing it across the room. He’s dead serious, but by the way you're giggling you obviously think its a joke.
He can’t help it, he dives in face first. Rubbing against your soft breasts, obsessed with the way they feel. Heavy, pillowy. He drags his tongue across all of your bare skin. From your clavicle to your nipple. You always smell so pretty, but its got nothing on the way you taste. It explodes bright and savory on his tastebuds.
You let him explore, until your spit soaked and shaking. Your panties sticky as your hips search for any kind of friction. “I need you”
“You have me, my love. All of me” your eyes water at his words. At the sincerity. At how much you want them to be true.
You grab one of his hands and drag it down your chest. Past your soft, rounded belly and into your shorts. He grunts as you guide him to where you’re wet and pulsing. Rythmetically clenching around nothing.
He circles your clit, feather light. More of a tease then anything and you want to sob. You’d thought of nothing but this, touched yourself imagining him. “Tey-”
He smiles around a mouthful of nipple,tugging on with his teeth. “I missed you so much”
“Then be nice to me” you plead, trying to shove yourself down on his fingers.
“We’re being nice now? Were you nice to me when you ignored me?” he can't help it, hurt bleeds into his voice. It had been so fucking painful, knowing that you hadnt wanted to see him. To be with him.
“I’m sorry” you whine, grabbing his face, pulling it from your bosom. “I’m so sorry. I was so scared- I’m still scared but I need you”
He lets you cup his cheeks, lets you plant kisses all over him. The bridge of his nose, his eyelids, his cheekbones. You dote on him, gentle and caring and he gorges himself on your love.
“You cant ever do that again, okay?” He shivers as you kiss his ear, running your tongue along the hyper sensitive flesh “If you’re scared you come to me, not run from me. Do you understand?”
You nod, eager. “I promise, Neteyam”
It’s all he needs to hear, that you’re his. That you won't deprive him of your presence ever again. He doesn't know what he’ll do. He’s a little scared of the man he becomes when it comes to you, you’re not the only one frightened by the gravity of your feelings.
“You asked if I wanted you inside me again? Yes. So much. I never knew I could be that full” it’s like you know just what to say. You light him up from the inside. His fingers begin circling your sopping clit again, this time with intent.
It’s blurry, the fact that your lightheaded making it hard to think. To track what he’s doing to you because somehow Neteyam seems to be everywhere at once. His big body all encompassing as he takes you.
“No-no marks, baby” You try to remind him and his blazing eyes zero in on you in a glare “you know we cant
not where they can see”
You’re right, and he hates it. He’ll just have to mark you where only you can see. Where you can look at your self and be reminded that you belong to someone. That you belong to him.
He doesn't have the patience, cant stop his hands from shaking- the tear of your shorts and panties echos around the room as he removes any barriers between him and the heat at the apex of your thighs.
You cant help the thrill it sends down your spine. He’d
ripped your panties off. You thought shit like this only existed in bad Earth made Porn that you’d found on one of the labs computers.
“Sorry, sorry” his apology is far from sincere though and you can't help but giggle, patting his braids fondly.
The fingerfucking is rough, your wines and moans spilling from you as he hits spots inside of you that make you want to curl up. It’s too good. Too much-
You screech, back bowing as he bends to kiss you, loud and sloppy, right on your wet clit. His big head burrows between your thigs as he delves on your cunt, his long rough textured tongue lapping at the fat puffy lips. The texture difference has both of you groaning.
It’s heartbreakingly good, the kind of good that you’ll never be able to forget. That you’ll crave and need for the rest of your life. Addictive, as he dedicates himself to making you feel pleasure.
Neteyam eats pussy the same way he does everything else in his life, exceeding any expectations. His instincts sharp as he hones in on how to make you lose your mind.
He keeps telling you how good you taste, breaking away for heaving breaths before he reburries himself. The only sounds in the room are the beyond wet sloshing of his tongue lashing and the pathetic noises your making.
He’s eating you alive, you don’t know how you’re supposed to survive this.
His fingers, two and then three fuck in and out of you. Corkscrewing as he loosens your tightness up for him.
“O-ooh” you whine high and reedy as you feel your tummy tightening, the pressure building in a way that makes you feel like you cant breathe. You cant your hips, shoving them down at that perfect angle “Oh, sh-shhhhit. I’m gonna, I’m-”
He doubles down and you’re a goner.
The orgasm is devastating. Sofuckinggood you think you might see stars for a minute there. You can't even scream, you keep letting out these little cries that are more like wheezes. A desprate attempt to get some kind of air back in your lungs-
Which reminds you.
Even though you’re in a daze you wiggle away from him, he hisses at you about it but you swat the top of his head as you reach for the Exo Pack.
You shove the mask in his face, between your legs.
”Breathe, Neteyam” you demand him to gulp down the Pandoran air. Yeah, he could go longer in your environment than you in his but still. Death by giving head isn’t the way you’d like him to go out.
He takes long breaths and you try not to be embarrassed by how soaked his chin is.
When he pulls away his eyes are a little more focused “Thank you, sweet girl. Always thinking about me, huh?”
You nod, dropping the mask. Closer this time for easier access. His eyes quickly zero back in on your swollen pussy, on how wet he got you. On how pretty it looks. His mouth is watering all over again-
When you try to close your thighs, the burning of your cheeks getting to be too much he hisses again. It’s not a sound he often makes and it’s a revelation, he’s so sexy. Almost feral.
“Who said I’m done?”
You’re never going to be able to get over this man “I already came?...”
“Yes? So?” he rolls his eyes, lowering his head, nuzzling at the damp juncture of your inner thigh “You’re still so tight, here feel”
His fingers slip back in you and you mewl, baring down as he scissors the long digits.
“We have to get you loose enough to take me, I don’t want to hurt you” He explains it like you need convincing. Like he has to convince you to let him eat you out. You just re-spread your thighs, relaxing back onto the cool floor as you let him do as he pleases.
It takes two more orgasms that you scream and shake through until he deems that you’re ready. By the time that he begins to slide his cock into you you’re a blubbering, oversensitive mess. You’re crying rivers of tears as you cling to him.
“Hold my hand? Please ” You request and he smiles, kissing your tear streaked cheek as he interlaces his longer fingers with yours.
Humans and Na’vi can fuck, but we’rnt designed to. His dick is overwhelimgly big and will really injure you if the two of you aren't careful about this.
You both gasp sharply as his tip breaches you.
It hurts, it’s agonizing. It’s the kind of pleasure pain that you didnt even know could exist. Everytime you think you can adjust, he pushes in another inch. But oh, how you missed it. Being so full it feels like you’re going to burst. You’re pussy flutters as it fights to take him and you focus in on his face.
It’s all scrunched up in heavy concentration. His lips speared between his sharp teeth in a way that has them almost bleeding.
You can't have that. You tug him into a kiss, soothing the abused flesh with your tongue.
“I-I dont want to hurt you” He whimpers as his forehead rests against yours.
“It’s okay, you’re okay” You hum to him, grasping at his hand even tighter “I love what you do to me. I love how you feel”
When he bottoms out you think he must be in your ribs. Hes still, letting your body get used to him. Trying to be kind. You want to tell him that there’s no getting used to his size. That he could fuck you every day for the rest of your lives and he would still feel just as massive.
“Please” you wail instead “please”
The first gentle snap of his pelvis has you both reeling. Your thighs lock around his thin hips, urging him. You can take it. It only takes a little urging for him to lose himself. The harsh stretch of it has you shaking as your over sensitive pussy tightens. You’re coming again, less intense the the previous orgasms, thankfully.
Neteyam had been so focused on making you feel good that he’d neglected his hard, weeping cock. His balls are so full that he knows he’s not going to be able to draw this out.
You know you have to look stupid, mouth hanging open as you raggedly gasp for breath, letting out punched out sounds as Neteyam pounds into you. You cant look away from his face though.
It’s mesmerizing, all of it. The sounds he lets out. The way that his braids sway with the rhythm of his pleasure seeking body. His broad shoulders, bulging biceps and forearms- you are so fucked.
You’re so in love.
“Please Y/N” He wheezes as you squeeze around him, letting go of your hand so he can wrap both of his arms around your lower back “I can’t hold it. W-where should I?”
Oh. Oh, he’s the sweetest man. He always has been.
You peck his lips, not minding that he’s too lost in his own pleasure to really kiss you back
“Come inside me. Come inside me. Come inside me” it’s a heated chant, broken and breathy by the erratic rhythm of his hips and he buries his head in your neck, wailing in the skin there.
Just for a moment, lost in the haze of sex, you can tell he forgets his own strength. Thrusts into you so hard that you scream out in pain, the mushroom tip of his long cock batters your cervix relentlessly. Its a sharp, startling sensation that you’ve never known but you ride it out for him. Desperately trying to keep your whimpers of discomfort at bay.
When he comes, his whole body goes still and ram rod straight. He hugs you tightly to him. You wish you could see his face. Next time, hopefully.
He’s Neteyam, the mighty warrior. The dutiful son. The next clan leader but as he shakes and twitches and basks in the afterglow you can't help but want to baby him. But stroke his back softly, rubbing the residual tension out of his tired muscles.
He’s your big ol’ pussy cat, you’d always teased. He purrs like one every time you’re affectionate with him.
You can’t help but run your hands along his sensitive spine. Let the length of his tail run through the loop of your fingers. He grins and flicks it from side to side. He’d always thought your fascination with it was amusing.
“Are you okay?” he mutters, still hidden in your hair as he starts to come back to himself and you hum, moving up to pat his braids.
“Mmhmm” you’re maybe not as capable of making words as you though you were. He chuckles and hugs you. Holds you in his big arms in a way that makes you feel untouchable.
The two of you lie in that room for as long as you can, until he has to start heading back to Home Tree, it’s almost morning and his parents are early risers. They’ll look for him if hes not in his tent

It's hard. Letting him go. Even though you know he’ll be back. You keep pulling him back in for kisses, holding onto his muscular arms until he laughs and peels you off of him.
“I’ll be back my love. I’ll always return for you”
You frown but agree, pushing him away to get re-dressed- “How am I supposed to go back like this! Neteyam I don't have any pants!”
He’d shredded your shorts and panties. Literal tatters of cloth are all that’s left.
Neteyam cracks up, almost keeling over. Thinking he’s oh so funny. It lightens the situation and makes letting him go- watching him disappear back in the forest a little easier.
You end up having to pull your fortunately oversized t-shirt down as far as it can go as you make a mad dash across the facility, back to your dorm. You fall asleep grinning, thinking about how the panties had been a necessary sacrifice.
———
Norms on late night watch, keeping a bored, admittedly not sharp enough eye on the security camera’s feeds. With the rainy season, came an influx of Slinths’. It made sense to have a lookout, and somehow he’d gotten saddled with an overnight shift.
He’d definitely fallen asleep for a few hours. Not that he’d tell anyone of that fact.
There is nothing that could prepare him for what he see’s on the screen, over in the desolate East Bay. First, he thinks that he’s hallucinating, his sleep bogged eyes playing tricks on him.
He rubs them hard with his knuckles, not believing the image that is large and clear on the security footage.
It’s Neteyam. Inside the facility which almost never happened. And he’s bending down, his lips locked with Y/N’s . Kissing her hard and long before she punch’s in the code, and opens the air locked door to let him back out into the shadowy eclipse.
Norm’s learned a lot living on this strange moon- Pandora was mysterious. Full of things his brilliant mind would never understand. So he does what he does’ most of the time.
Minds his own business.
So I’ve had this idea cooking for months, but didn’t have the bandwidth to get it written down. The ideas wouldn’t translate to page and I still kind of feel like they didn’t butttttt whatever. This is pure self indulgence. I am so much more in love with Neteyam now. He is SUCH a good guy. Ugh.
Also, please remember that my requests are OPEN! Send in all that good shit. Come blue alien brain rot with me!
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stargirlrchive · 2 years ago
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ocean eyes: chapter two ✩ jake sully
masterlist ⋆ ËšïœĄâ‹†à­šà­§Ëš ocean eyes masterlist
summary: widow!jake sully x female!reader, 10 year age-gap. jake is lowkey sunshine <3 reader is grumpy! arranged marriage/marriage of convenience, eventual smut + wc - 1,753
comments: part two lovers, i love reader, she's is slay girl boss fr ! idk what to say lmao but tysm for the love on part one, i hope you love this just as much! also omg pls check this out, @saltsacc drew what they think reader looks like and she's gorg! i litch cried ! but okay bye lovers <3 part three should be up on thursday <3
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The morning time had come quickly, the bright sun hitting your features and it disrupted your wonderful slumber. But if the sun hadn't woken you up, your sister's voice certainly would have. “Tsmuke! You need to be ready by now. Oh Great Mother, give me strength!”
You rubbed at your sleepy eyes, throwing her an annoyed glance, “Why are you being so strange? They are just other Na’vi. Or let me guess, Eywa has let you know they are of importance?”
Ronal pinched at her nose, “If you must know, he is Toruk Makto. He was the Olo’eyktan of the Omatikaya. He is important, more than you know!”
You laughed quietly, “Do not let Tonowari hear you, you sound enamored.”
“Stupid girl!”
You laughed louder, shaking your head as you stretched before getting up. “Make haste!”
You hissed at her lightly, your good-hearted nature wearing thin as she rushed you. You quickly washed your face, Ronal helping you by fixing up your hair. “Oh Eywa, you are preparing me like I am going to marry the man!”
She said nothing, her nervous fingers quickly braiding a few pearls into your hair. “What is so special about him anyway?”
“Did you not hear what I said? He is Toruk Makto.”
You huffed in annoyance, “Of course I heard you sister, but-” Your shoulders shrugged, “How mighty can he be if he left his whole clan behind?”
She smacked your shoulder roughly, “Ow! Ronal-”
“Must you always be so crass? His mate died a few years back.”
“How did she die?”
“Protecting her children, in the battle field. I do not know much else.”
You bit down on your bottom lip, instantly feeling guilty, “Oh.”
“Yes, oh. So be kind to him, to all of them.”
“You may think poorly of me sister, but I am not mean.”
Ronal’s fingers stilled in her movements, face scrunching up as she mulled over what you said, “I do not think poorly of you.”
You didn't say anything else, toying with your fingers as you sat in front of Ronal, “Tsmuke, I do not think poorly of you.”
You grumbled out quietly, “You already said that.”
“I-I just want what is best for you, and at times I do not think you know how to find that for yourself.”
“Ronal, I am happy.”
“You are reckless! You think I do not know why you behave the way you do? You want the attention you lacked as a child, but you are grown now. There are responsibilities and duties you must fulfill.”
Her harsh words caused tears to well to your eyes, pulling away from her, “You do not listen!”
“And you do not obey!”
“Why should I? You are my sister, not my mother! Just because you ended up happy with Tonowari does not mean I will end up happy with whoever you stick me with. I love my freedom far too much to give it up.”
She sighed in exasperation, “Well that is not your decision. It is the Great Mother’s and she has spoken to me.”
It dawned upon you then, what all this was about. The enthusiasm to have you meet the Toruk Makto, dressing you up. “You are planning to mate me with that man?”
There was a glimmer of guilt in her eyes, but it was shaken away as she nodded her head. “He is a good man, with a strong heart. He will be good for you.”
Your words were low, quite with disbelief, “I cannot believe you.”
Ronal said nothing, “I always knew you wanted me out of your life, too much of a burden for you and Tonowari but I did not expect you to push me into the arms of the first man you saw!”
A spike of pain ran through Ronal, this is exactly what she feared. She made her way to you, the apology already starting to fall from her mouth but your shaky finger pointing at her stopped her movements. “Stop! Don’t-do not come near me!”
Your ears flattened against your head, the words getting caught in Ronal’s throat as she watched your eyes pool with tears. “Please get out so I can change.”
Ronal’s fear of hurting you even more had her walking out of the marui, leaving you to wallow in your own pity as you dressed yourself.
Tonowari instantly wrapped Ronal into his arms, rubbing against her back to soothe her, “Wari, she is going to hate me for the rest of her life.”
He shushed her quietly, having heard everything that happened, “No she will not, Yawne. You know how nervous you were before we actually mated. It is a big step in our lives, we just need to let her be.”
Ronal let herself bask in the warmth Tonowari provided, pulling away just a few seconds before you stepped out. Ronal’s eyes scanned over you, you looked so beautiful. She wanted to compliment you but knew you'd take it as mockery, some sort of jab to make you feel worse. So she said nothing, walking besides Tonowari and you followed quickly behind the two.
You were far more quiet than normal, and it hit Ronal just how much she actually enjoyed your inability to remain quiet. Tonowari called your name, “Did you hear me?”
“No-I did not.”
“I said I think he will be good for you.”
“If you say so.”
The pair shared a look, your tame behavior caused a sense of worry to nestle into Ronal. They entered the marui of Jake Sully, the Na’vi was sharpening his knives but other than that, it was empty. Tonowari cleared his throat, Jake’s head snapped up and was greeted with the three of you. “Tonowari, Ronal-oel ngati kameie.”
His eyes shifted to you, your eyes were already locked on him and Jake felt his ears twitch. Ronal uttered your name out, “This is my Tsmuke.”
“Oel ngati kameie, Jake Sully.”
“Oel ngati kameie.”
He noticed your intricate top, your pretty hair and how your skin glowed beautifully against the sun. He felt his throat instantly dry up the more he took you in. “We spoke briefly yesterday of your stay here.”
“Oh, yes.”
“The Tsahik and I have discussed what we wish for you to be able to stay. We know you have come seeking Uturu, a fresh start but we must also ensure this is safe for the clan. Beneficial to our people. You understand?”
Jake nodded his head, he more than most understood what it was like to make decisions that he did not entirely want for the prosperity of the clan. “Well, we can allow you and your family to stay if you mate with a woman of the Metkayina Clan. More specifically, with her.”
Your ears turned downwards slightly, but still you held his gaze. That was certainly not what he expected. “We understand that it may be hard to just thrust this upon you, so we will give you both time to adjust. She will be the one to train you, help you adjust to life near the water.”
A swift flicker of anger made its way to your eyes, turning towards Tonowari, “I do not have time to train him.”
“Well then you will make time.”
Your eyes rolled back, anger seeping into his family home from you alone. Jake would be lying if he said he did not enjoy seeing you so agitated, especially when it came to him. He fought the smile that was trying to make its way to his face the more he watched you. “What do you say, JakeSully?”
Your eyes jumped back to him, there was a look in your eyes that he could not quite place but it excited him beyond belief, “If that is what you wish. I only hope I can speak to my children about this before the clan is made aware?”
Your mouth dropped slightly in disbelief, confusion webbing its way into your mind as to why he would agree to this so willingly. You thought you'd have time, time to be on your worst behavior around him so he can back out before he even agreed. But no, he had already said yes to you.
Your arms crossed over your chest stubbornly, huffing out a breath of annoyance as you watched the smallest of smiles fall across his features. Ronal was trying her best to contain her excitement, she had always wanted you to mate with someone, and it appeared that the time was soon.
She turned to look at you and was unsurprised to find you glaring at the Toruk Makto, your lip jutting out in an angry pout. “Very well, JakeSully. Make your preparations and we will announce it during a feast a few weeks down the line, yes?”
He only hummed, eyes still locked onto yours. You rolled your eyes at him, he was clearly enjoying himself, “Can I leave now?”
Ronal called your name but you ignored her, walking fast out of the home and towards the beach.
Tonowari’s mouth turned into a thin line as he sent an awkward look towards Jake. “She is very kind, just-strong willed.”
A quiet laugh left Jake’s mouth, “I can see that.”
He walked with the two out of his mauri, his eyes scanning the waters and he locked onto your form, jumping head first into the water as an ilu swam towards you. Ronal tsk’ed quietly, “She is going to ruin her clothes.”
Jake watched you retreat further into the water, your animal easily gliding along as you got smaller and smaller. “Are you sure she will show up to train me?”
Jake’s eyes moved over to Tonowari, “Yes, I will make sure of it.”
Jake’s fingers reached his forehead, signing them goodbye as they walked away. He let out a quiet breath, his thoughts consumed with excitement and wonderment at just how these next few weeks may play out.
Your feelings on the matter were entirely different, anger coursing through your veins as you swam out past the reef.
Ao’nung and Tsireya shared a look, noticing the angry glare on your face when you didn’t even bother to stop and talk to them. “Should we tell Sa’nok and Sempul?”
Ao’nung shook his head at his younger sister, “Ma’ will pluck her eyes out for real this time.”
Tsireya fumbled with her fingers nervously, “Ao’nung, it is going to storm, she didn’t look to be thinking clearly-”
He watched your form retreating farther and farther, heading towards the Three Brothers rocks. “If she does not return in an hour we will call for father.”
Tsireya sighed quietly but listened all the same, returning back to her task at hand. “So, you must learn to breathe from here.” She pointed to her stomach, “Take deep breaths, fill your lungs and slow your heart. It will assist with staying underwater longer.”
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Three hours had passed by and you were still out past the reef, finding refuge in the mountains as the waters turned violent, your ilu having swam away as it noticed the dangers of the water. You huffed out in frustration, Ronal was truly going to kill you now.
Ao’nung was the first to notice just how late it had become. By the way the sun was hitting just a few moments ago, he could tell that well more than an hour's time had passed, and you were still not back. The water rocked them violently, and Tsireya’s sharp gasp of air at seeing a lone ilu swimming back only furthered his fear for you. His parents were going to kill you.
“Tsireya-”
“We must cut the training short, we will see you all tomorrow.”
Both Ao’nung and Tsireya swam quickly back to shore, leaving behind four confused Omatikaya Na’vi. “Their aunt, she’s-how do I put this nicely-rebellious?”
Rotxo laughed quietly, shaking his head as he watched his two friends swim as fast they could back to the beach. “Lets head back, no point in training with the waters like this.”
The two siblings entered their marui, surprised to find Jake sitting with their parents, they both dipped their heads to the former Olo’eyktan before turning to their parents, “Have you seen Tanhí?”
“That is why we are here, Sa’nok.”
Ronal’s brows raised in question, noticing the tremble of worry in her daughter's voice, “She-she left past the reef a few hours ago.”
Ronal swore she felt her blood pressure go up, feeling woozy at her sister's complete disregard for rules. “But-”
“But what?”
Ao’nung watched his younger sister's ears pin to her head, losing her voice, “But she has not returned, and the ilu she rode on did. She rode in the direction of the Three Brothers.”
Tonowari let out a deep breath, his head throbbed roughly as he looked out to see how violent the waters were. “I will be back shortly.”
“Sempul-the water is dangerous.”
“Yes, but knowing your Aunt the trouble she is in is more volatile than the waters.”
Jake noticed how calm the breeze was despite the rain, it was perfect weather to take flight. “I know where Three Brother’s rocks are. I can fly on my Ikran, it is safer than you riding out on a Tsurak.”
Ronal protested quickly, knowing her sister, “I do not think that is a good idea, JakeSully.”
He felt a bit of disappointment settle into his chest, he couldn’t help it, he was so intrigued by you. And truth be told, maybe it was a stupid part of him, but he liked the idea of saving you. Or at least helping you. From what he had heard, you were more than capable to fend for yourself. “It really is no big deal, I will be back quickly.”
He was hoping his eagerness was not evident in his voice, and with the worried look Ronal shared with Tonowari he was sure it wasn’t. “We should let him? Yes-might ease your sister's resistance if he’s the one to go for her?”
Tonowari was asking, but Ronal knew he had already made up his mind. She sighed quietly, “Fine-sure. Just-I cannot guarantee she will greet you with a warm smile.”
Jake refrained from thumping his tail in excitement, “It’s fine. I will not take it to heart.”
Jake quickly made his way outside, calling for Bob just as his children made their way towards the beach. “Sir?”
Neteyam, his oldest, was looking at him in confusion. “Is everything alright?”
“Yes, I will be back shortly.”
He sent all of them a smile, instructing his Ikran to take flight. The air got colder the further he was from the beach and it caused a shiver to run down his spine. He was well past the reef, and searching for you within ten minutes. As his Ikran gently flew around he caught the blur of teal blue amongst one of the tall rocks. His head shook, a laugh threatening to fall from his mouth, as even from this far away you looked upset.
He did not know you, but he was curious, beyond interested in knowing you. There was a deep itch in the back of his brain that seemed to only simmer at the thought of you. Call him stupid, he had only caught a few glimpses of you, but he felt the pull. He hoped you felt it too.
With quick glides he was by your side, dismounting Bob with ease as he sent you a smile. Your eyes narrowed in on him, annoyance clear as day on your features. Jake’s lips tugged gently, refraining from cracking you a toothy smile. “Why are you here?”
“Hello to you too.”
You grumbled out angrily, arms crossing along your chest as you looked away from him. “I am here to take you back.”
Your thick tail swayed behind you in annoyance, “I was perfectly fine here. Waiting for the storm to pass.”
“I am sure you were, but I am here now. So let me take you back.”
You did not like the tone he had with you, his accent thick with humor as he watched you. It only caused your irritation to spike up. “I do not know you. Plus I am not used to riding on-those bird things. I rather not.”
Bob huffed at your words, clacking loudly at you. “They’re Ikrans, and very smart.”
Jake was sure his voice was dripping with his amusement, he couldn’t help it. You made him laugh. “I know what they are!” You all but shrieked, “Does not make me trust them anymore so.”
Jake laughed, shaking his head at you. Your eyes narrowed in on him, irritation flowing through you so deeply you refrained from yelling at him. You hissed at him, and it caused a harder laugh to leave his lips.
“If you keep me here for any longer, Tonowari will come searching for us. You are already in trouble with your sister. Do you wish to make it worse?”
“I am not a child!”
“That is very obvious, so why make this harder than it needs to be?”
Jake quickly mounted his Ikran, he was almost positive you would follow after him. You weighed your options, you knew Ronal would be angry with you, should you really test your luck?
You groaned out in frustration, walking towards Jake and his Ikran. This was far scarier than taming a Tsurak, you would have no control on the animal. His five fingered hand extended to you, and you could not help but stare. His fingers were scarred, and calloused, slipping your fingers together as he pulled you up.
You swiftly threw a leg over the Ikran, shifting farther back on the animal as you were pressed too close to him. “Hold on.”
“I am fine as I am.”
He shook his head, creating Tsaheylu with his Ikran and the animal instantly jolted forward. You were thrown back lightly, hands instinctively wrapping around his waist to keep you steady. If you could see Jake’s face he was sure you’d hiss at him once again. The smallest of smirks fell onto his features.
The cool wind caused a shiver to run down your back, admiring how beautiful the island looked even in the darkness of the storm. You peaked your head to look ahead, frowning deeper the closer you arrived to the beach. “I hope you know I could have made my way back without you.”
“And I do not doubt that.”
“Good.”
As you both landed, you could see Ronal’s angry face as she stomped towards you. “Here we go.”
Jake helped you dismount, jumping quickly down after you. “See what I mean! Reckless!”
You rolled your eyes at your sister, walking straight past her and towards your home. Jake could see the exhaustion on Ronal’s face. He would be lying if he said he did not sympathize with her. It was clear that she cared for you deeply, but there were some lines blurred between the two of you. “Thank you, JakeSully.”
Jake only dipped his head down at the Tsahik, watching your figure retreat farther away.
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soobadnoonecanstopher · 2 months ago
Text
Rat Bastard - Part 7
Pairing: You x Kyungsoo 
Rating: M (Mature)
Word Count: 8900
Warnings: There were too many beds, Enemies to Lovers, Slow Burn, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Idiots to Lovers
A/N: I wrote this in less than a day and none of it followed any of the plans I had for this story. This new laptop makes it too easy to write and it might end up adding extra chapters to this fic. Sorry and you’re welcome.
Tag: @ilovemyapopbaby
Links: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8
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The silence that sat down atop both of your heads after that door closed tight, leaving you and him completely alone together for the first time in literally forever was about as loud as anything you’d ever experienced. 
Kyungsoo stood just inside of the drab entryway and you had been lingering closer to the hallway that would take you further into the shelter. You watched his face for a while, trying to gauge the mood he would be in to find himself trapped in here with you for at least one night, maybe two if things got wild at the hospital and Mr. Chen wasn’t able to get away as he promised. 
How would he feel about this? The relationship and you used that word strictly for lack of any other word to describe the you and the him, had been strained from the start, downright hostile at times, and only very recently kind of sort of settled into this civil agreement in which you did not antagonize him and he did not antagonize you -- much. 
It wasn’t a friendly relationship for he himself had told you quite brutally last night that he had no interest in being your friend, but lately, with the interactions that had grown just a little bit softer, the chat you’d had with him out on the patio as he made you ramen and teased you about your sexual optimism, the silly time passing game of stating a personal preference between two completely inconsequential things and you found, much to your surprise that you and he shared more than a few minor tastes in common; the fright you had been triggered into with the spiders in the movie and the genuine comfort you felt from him; it felt almost as if something somewhere might be changing. Were you, just as you had been with the threat from the fake spiders, simply imagining the entire thing? 
“Well, shit,” Kyungsoo whispered mostly to himself after the heavy door slammed shut and you looked up into his face to catch the smallest furrow of his brows and the frown of his lips. 
Was this a worst case scenario for him? Trapped alone with the girl he never wanted to be trapped with? Having gone out of his way all those months ago to ditch her on that stupid blind date and she just had to be pathetic enough to pick a fight with him about it, and then about anything and everything she could find to fight about and just when he thought he’d escaped that nightmare of a person she shows up here and not only is she forced upon him by the staff here but now he’s somehow charged with feeding her and entertaining her? You could see it in his face. He looked disappointed as evidenced by the furrow and the frown.
You pulled your arms up and crossed them over your chest, pulling your eyes down and away from that disappointed look you saw in his eyes and you made a deal with yourself then and there; you would not be a burden. You would keep as good a distance as this situation allowed and behave yourself as far as your temper or your tangled feelings for the man were concerned. You wouldn't let it show just how far down this pathetic rabbit hole you’d fallen of uninvited attraction and unrequited love. You’d treat him with disinterest, maybe casual civility that a shop worker would get, or that old man at the grocery store who made a friendly joke about the price of eggs and you provided the required perfunctory laugh at exactly the right pitch and tone to be deemed socially acceptable. That was what you would do, you would perform as expected by society in such a situation. 
It wasn’t his fault that you’d allowed this little crush to fester deep inside your stomach; and for a man who didn’t even desire friendship from you. It wasn’t the first time you’d let your heart run away with your mind. It didn’t have to happen with this man. 
You felt a slight burning in your stomach, just below your breastplate and you placed a palm over the space where you felt the pain. You knew enough about your body to recognize that you were just feeling the aftereffects from the panic from earlier. It always came as an upset stomach that burned and ached usually for hours after your heightened emotions had run their course. 
“What is it?” You hadn’t expected his attention but he must have seen your hand sink down hard just over the space at the top of your stomach. He must have noticed the look of discomfort on your face that you quickly blanked away with the drop of your hand. 
“Nothing,” you said flatly dropping the subject entirely before he had a chance to probe or suspect more of you and you lifted a hand to half shrug into the air, “umm
 did you want to finish the movie or 
 maybe play another game?”
His lips parted and he closed them up, his eyes briefly leaving your face and glancing behind you into the dark hallway from where you both had come. 
When he didn’t answer you right away you inhaled to speak again, before you sounded like his own liability that he had to deal with, “you don’t have to do either, if you don’t want to. I don’t need you to entertain me or anything, I can figure something out for myself if you just want to be alone.”
You’d already spun on your heels, determined with your newfound resolve to be exactly as aloof and unaffected by anything he said or did as required by society to keep the peace; taking the first few steps away from him and turning back toward the dim light from the open kitchen door that you could barely make out as a direction in which you should travel.
“We could,” the first sounds of his voice stopped your steps and you turned your face in his direction, not committing to turning around the whole way, “play something, if you want.” 
“Not Monopoly again, I swear to God,” you said with a finger lifted into the air and you heard the soft chuckle that came from behind you. 
“Awww, my little Princess didn’t like the bitter taste of defeat?” You could hear the joking tone in his voice and weirdly that strong feeling of uncertainty you’d felt only moments earlier seemed to change with the teasing tone he used with you. Changed into what? You wouldn’t say, but it was only a slightly more comfortable feeling. There was a burning sensation just under the skin below your cheekbones and you thanked whatever god was responsible for putting you in this darkened hallway during this moment for the cover that would keep the blush from being noticed by him. You were imagining the softness you heard in that nickname. This man did not hold any affection for you. 
Inside the kitchen you returned to the familiar set up that you had left, only it felt wildly different. Gone was the soft comfy feeling of the mattresses on the floor, the pillows set up at your back and the fluffy down winner’s blanket sat in a tangled clump on the floor beside the bed that you both had occupied. The briefest of thoughts flittered by -- would you be able to smell him in it now? That clean, crisp fragrance he seemed to carry with him, would those microscopic molecules be wound into the spaces in between your one thousand threads ready to drift inside of your nose, bringing you back to the moment below the blanket when his fingers intertwined between your own and he held your hand, keeping you grounded and still connected to this world. The comfort he had given you then, but why? To keep you from embarrassing yourself or maybe him? You couldn't find the reasoning for it anywhere inside of you, but this wouldn't be the first time that man did something you couldn't understand. 
The burning was back. You had an absentminded hand running over the spot on your belly and your feet carried you to the spot beside the fridge where the water bottles sat. You ‘d seen an electric kettle there and you busied yourself grabbing a mug and heating the water. Behind you, Kyungsoo was looking through the games again, trying to find something that he could no doubt destroy you with again. Your heart wasn’t in the fight this time, you felt too distracted. 
The water was heated and you poured some into a cup, finding that plain hot water always soothed your stomach the best and you returned to his side to peer over his shoulder holding your mug. 
He glanced over at you and down at the mug, making no comment about either, and then he held up a game. It was your game. It was the first game, a word game you’d picked to play with a nostalgic and hopeful glint in your eye. 
“We can play this one, if you want,” he said with a bit of a whisper as if you two weren’t the only ones in this entire building, “it’s still fun even with only two people.”
You nodded and took a seat near him but not close enough so he could cheat and look at your letters and he quietly set up the game, not once looking directly at your face for too long apart from the smallest of brushes with his eyes into yours as he handed you bits and pieces for the game. 
You settled into your seat and took a good long look at the letters you had to pick from, picking a few up and shuffling them to see if you could come up with something good and after a few moments you settled on something that was actually pretty decent, especially for the first round. The realization pulled a small smile to your face and you grabbed the letters to place them on the board. He’d already told you that you could go first and as you began placing your tiles on the board you looked up to find that he was watching you, of course he was; you were playing the first word. This word would determine what he could or couldn’t play from his letters. 
You played your word and did the math, giving yourself a nice start with 20 points and you wrote down the number on the pad of paper and looking up at him expectantly. You had expected him to be paying attention to the word, to be impressed by your intelligence. You had managed to spell that word on your very first go. You had expected him to feel thoroughly challenged by the force he had to reckon with. 
He sat there though, his eyes watching you but something about his mind seemed disconnected from the game. Your smile at your own move slipped just a little bit, falling flat because he hadn’t even looked at the word you played yet. He just sat there with his shoulders relaxed, his unshuffled letters sitting there in front of him, he didn't even have his fingers on them, rearranging and thinking as you would have expected. He just sat there -- it was odd. You lifted your chin and wiggled your head, lifting your eyebrows and you heard an inhale as he took a deep breath and exhaled as he slowly pushed the air through his lips and when he was empty his eyes closed up. He gave his head a little shake back and forth and finally, finally his eyes left your face. 
Finally he was looking down. 
“Oh you played that, hmm,” you heard him mumble and he was back. All at once, his fingers were touching lightly over his letters, picking some up, moving them, shoving some aside, actually thinking about the game in front of him instead of whatever in the world he had been so distracted by. 
You lifted your mug and took a sip, feeling the warmth of the hot water warm the inside of your stomach a little bit. The pain was still there even after another sip and you looked down at the mix of letters you had thinking of what word you might play next. You adjusted your posture some, lifting a hand to rub just below your breastplate again, wishing that knot would just go down and be done so you could win this game already. 
Kyungsoo had played his word, counted out his points, and wrote a sad little 16 under his name. You were already winning. The self-satisfied smile was back, it had replaced the wince on your face when you realized you already had your next word. You played it quickly and tallied up your numbers. 24 -- He really didn’t stand a chance. 
You heard the scrape of chair legs and the sound pulled your attention up to the man who was standing up and walking away from you toward the kitchen cabinets at the back wall. 
“It’s your turn, Kyungsoo,” you called toward his retreating back. 
“I know, I’m just getting something real quick,” he called without looking back at you and you heard him inside the fridge, heard him pulling something out and he was slicing something with a knife on a board. The kettle was going again and you heard a metal spoon hitting porcelain as he stirred something into a cup. 
He was back quickly with two mugs in his hand and when he returned to your side he’d place one of the mugs in front of you. 
The color of the water inside the cup was a pale yellow and you saw a single disc of sliced ginger floating on the surface. You could see the string and tab from a tea bag in his mug. 
“Honey and ginger,” he said as he busied himself with playing a word on the board game, “for your stomach,” he added as if you’d made an announcement at the start of your game that your stomach was hurting and he was just responding to that. 
You hadn’t said a single thing to him about it. In fact, you had thought you were doing a pretty good job hiding it from him. You hadn’t let him see you frown or groan or cry out in pain once. The worst you did was lightly massage the space where it hurt the most. 
You lifted his offering to your lips and took a sip expecting it to be too hot for you to drink comfortably and finding the temperature rather mild actually. You took another bigger sip and felt the soothing warmth slip into you. It was sweet with the honey he added and slightly spicy from the fresh ginger he’d added. It was delicious. You’d never tried this for your stomach aches before but it seemed to actually be helping. You took another sip and swallowed, finding that the burning lessened with each sip you took. 
Kyungsoo silently played a word and you watched his mouth moving as he added up his points and wrote down his score of 20. 
You smiled widely. He had just played the letter you needed to play your next word and with the orientation of the word you would be able to get the bonus points. You were already laying your letters out on the board and counting out your points before he’d even had a chance to replace the letters he’d used on the last word. 
“Oh come on, what? You gotta give me a chance to catch you,” he groaned in annoyance that didn’t really seem to sink too deep into him for him to really mean it. You could still see the smile on the edges of his mouth and in his eyes. You did a little victory wiggle in your seat, wrote down 50 points under your name, and even stuck your tongue out at him with a giggle. His eyes slipped down your face and his lips had been pulled into a smile, despite the fact that he was losing this game miserably. 
He pulled his head back a little bit and looked up into the air above his head. A quick glance at his pieces told you he still needed to replace letters and so you held up the bag with the open end toward him. He was still sulking about the heavy blow and you had to reach out to touch your fingertips over the back of his warm hand to get his attention. You gave the bag a little shake and you had his eyes in yours again as he reached into the bag, pulling out tiles and groaning at the letters the universe had decided to give him. 
“Ugh,” he was groaning with each new letter he pulled out. His eyes darted over the game board and occasionally slipped back up into yours, probably because you had been watching him for signs that he had something good to play. It didn’t seem like he did. 
“Blegh,” he made a disgusted sound,  complaining again. “What am I going to do? What do I do, what do I do?” he repeated to himself as he pondered his brand new fate as a loser of this game. 
In his hand, he held only two tiles and he hovered lightly over a space on the board. You giggled when he set them down. It was the saddest word you’d seen in a while. 
“You’re going to have to do better than that if you want to beat me, Kyungsoo,” you sing-songed playfully watching him spell out the word ‘SEE’ for only 5 points.
His hand moved and he spun his letters around, showing you very quickly the hand he had. You saw a slew of vowels, mostly the letter E and everyone’s least favorite burden a single solitary X. 
You were openly laughing at him now. His cheeks were pink and he was reaching into the bag to select his replacement letters and when he pulled them out he tossed them in disgust. They both landed flat on the table, face up with a clatter. He had thrown them there. You looked down to see two more Es and the sight threw you back into a noisy fit of laughter that seemed to be catching. You could hear him giggling beside you and he gripped the Es in his fingertips and tried to put them back into the bag. You snatched it up quickly and held the bag of letters out of his reach so he couldn't cheat and put them back in. 
“No no,” you gasped through the giggles, “Think of words with lots of Es like meet, umm, teeth, f-feet,” you said through a strained voice and you were laughing again at the look he shot you at the mention of the words that brought up a very recent sore memory for him. 
“Teeth and feet?” He said with his eyes wide, “You really brought that up again?” He exhaled through his teeth, his lips pulled wide in frustration. He was leaning now, reaching desperately past your game pieces to where you still kept the bag of letters out of his reach to keep him from cheating, even though you were pretty sure he wouldn’t be able to catch up with you even if he replaced all of his letters now. He had scooted his chair closer to you and you reached for his desperate hand, gripping around his fingers and pulling his hand down into your lap, holding it tightly there and leaning into him to help you gain some leverage against him. He was quite strong when he wanted to be but he seemed to be letting you hold him back like this. He definitely wasn’t putting his all into this struggle against you. Something was off with him. Kyungsoo had never held back on that chance to be terrible with you before. 
Instead, he had moved in too close to you and after the small playful struggle, you felt the warmth of him all over you. You had been giggling as he reached out with his other hand, reaching again for the bag of letters you held out of his reach and you felt the tips of his fingers wrap around your wrist and he pulled your arm down. It was a bit of a stalemate and you heard the soft laughter from him settle and go curiously still, when you opened your eyes you found his face in front of yours. You had his hand inside of yours down on your lap right over your thigh and he held your other hand with his fingers wrapped tightly around your wrist.  You hadn’t expected this level of closeness from him, the shock you felt radiating through your chest had taken the laughter out of your voice and left you stunned in a frozen silence instead. 
You suddenly felt hyper-aware of your own body. He was so close to you, that you wondered if he was able to hear how noisily your heart was pounding inside of your chest, or if he could hear the stuttered way your breathing moved in and out of your lungs. 
God, he was beautiful up close. His skin was clear and he had a scattering of tiny moles all over. The small freckle in his upper lip seemed to have a presence all of its own and you struggled to look away from him. Your eyes roamed over the length of his face. He had long since stopped laughing and he had even stopped reaching for the bag, stopped struggling against your hands and he was watching you with slow blinking wandering eyes over your face that seemed to settle again heavy and deep inside of your eyes. 
You exhaled a breath you had been holding through your parted mouth and his eyes slipped down to look at your mouth when you moved. This was something. Something was happening here. Something that shouldn’t exist with the intense animosity he’s always felt for you. Something between you and something between him. You could feel it in the way your skin flushed, the blood in your body seemed to seek refuge in some place that wasn’t in your veins. You found it difficult to breathe with him so close and those eyes of his didn’t let up, they didn’t let you go, you felt so much more trapped here in his eyes than ever before. Your ears picked up on the smallest grunt of effort from somewhere in the back of his throat, then the smallest inhale of breath lifted his lungs, and finally, finally, he closed his eyes.
“I think I’ve lost this game,” he whispered through closed eyes with a sudden tight clench of his jaw. 
He was leaning. He was moving. You watched the sway of his balance and he moved closer to you, impossibly closer and the fingers he’d wrapped around your wrist released their hold, that hand was moving. You felt the first tiny touches of his fingertips as he moved his hand to touch your face lightly and achingly slowly along your jawline. You felt as if you could burst into flames at any second and judging by the heavy puffs of air that left his lungs, something similar was happening to him too. 
He leaned into you, close enough for a kiss but something stopped him. You felt and saw the lean though. He pulled back half a centimeter and it felt like he was at war with himself. 
You watched his face as he did it. His eyes, he kept them closed up as tightly as he could and the hard clench of his jaw did not let up. 
He was touching you though. His hand had moved and his thumb brushed lightly over your bottom lip and his fingertips dug in behind your ear. His other hand, the one that you held in your lap had moved too and you felt a squeeze from his fingers as he clenched tightly around your hand. 
Everything about him was tense. His jaw, his hands, his eyes squeezed shut tightly. 
This man was very purposefully attempting to regain control of himself and resist whatever it was he was feeling by being this close to you, by you touching him, and by him touching you. Your own self-control felt thready. How easily you could snap in two. How flimsy your resolve had grown around him. 
You’d long since dropped the bag of letters. You felt the need for the warmth of his soft skin under your fingertips. So you reached for his face, delighting in wonder at the smoothness your fingertips traveled over, even with the hard clench of his jaw he felt so warm and inviting and he was still so very close to you. He smelled so good, it was overwhelming. You wanted him. 
He was so very close; close enough for you to feel every quick burst of air that came from his nose against your lips, close enough for you to so easily lean your face into his and press your lips up against the softness of his mouth.
So you did it, you did it -- you leaned into him and you kissed him on the lips, relishing in the softness you felt when his lips gave into yours so, so easily, it seemed to come like second nature when you had actually worked up the nerve to do it. 
There were almost imperceivable changes in him when you did it; when you kissed him. The hard clench in his jaw let up with the soft grunt of surprise that came from the back of his throat and in his hands; the loosening of the tight grip he held you with on your face as he simply let go of you entirely for the first few seconds of this kiss from you. 
The next change was less subtle, you felt the careful way he caved to your lips. The tilt of his head paired with the parting of his jaw and he leaned into you further, pulling your soft bottom lip into his mouth then pulling you again, your upper lip. When he moved again you felt the tip of his wet tongue guide along your teeth and reach for yours with that same suction he had pulled against you which you gave to him, giving him what he wanted, feeling very much out of control now with greedy the way he sucked on your tongue. The kiss was too much in an instant. The undeniable attraction you felt for this man had taken every bit of rational thought and tossed it out the window, carrying them all away with the wind outside. 
His mouth and teeth and tongue nipped inside of your mouth, pulling at your lips and he was moving, peppering tiny kisses, bites, and nibbles along your jawline as he moved lower to taste the skin below your ear. 
You reached for him again, reaching a hand forward for his waist and lower, you’d lost your mind when you touched near his belt, slipping the tips of your fingertips in between the denim fabric and feeling along the elastic waistband of his underwear. Feeling the very clear bump of his arousal and the warmth of his skin there.
His hand flew up to stop you and you heard the soft groan that came from his chest against his will. You could feel your labored breathing taking your chest and heaving it up and you shook your head back and forth at the nerve he had to stop you. You wanted him, you wanted the sex. You were beginning to feel desperate for him. 
Kyungsoo leaned his forehead against yours and his hands now had a strong ironclad grip on your wandering hands. You felt the very slight movement of his face back and forth. 
No. 
He was telling you no. 
You had to take a genuine moment to absorb it. He was telling you no. You closed your eyes and inhaled a deep breath and you inhaled the no, the refusal, the rejection took its time coming at you slowly in a big old sluggish wave and your breathing was beginning to calm down now. 
“Kyungsoo?” You called out lightly, feeling just a bit upset and even more confused as to why he would have kissed you back so intensely if he didn’t want this. 
“I,” he opened his mouth and pulled his head back, “I don’t—” his words were broken, staggered, and fractured, “I couldn’t live with myself.”
“You don’t want me like that.” It wasn’t a question. You weren’t asking him a damn thing. It was a stark realization that you had simply misread his actions as affection. 
“I don’t mean that,” he began, his voice clearer and with slightly more urgency than the staggered speech from earlier, he inhaled and swallowed, licking his lips as his eyes searched over your face. 
“I don’t do that lightly,” he exhaled and furrowed his brows, narrowing his eyes and looking into your face again, “I’ve never slept with someone outside of a relationship. I don’t do it. This can’t happen. We aren’t going to have sex.” 
He had released his tight grip on your hands now that his reasoning was out and you sat there feeling just a little bit foolish for having jumped so quickly straight to sex. You felt the embarrassment hit you hard and you closed your eyes through it and shook your head, straightening your back and removing your hands from within his fingers and pulling them back toward you as you carefully busied yourself with straightening your shirt back out. This felt awful. You reached down for the mug with the now cold ginger honey water and you downed the remains quickly, hoping that some of that sweet honey might coat your insides and soothe your fractured ego while it was at it. 
You felt the softness of his hand land over yours when you put the mug back down and you looked down at it, his hand covering over yours. You could feel it then, he was asking you to look at him. You had been embarrassed by the rejection and had been busying yourself with literally anything that wasn’t him. He’d given you time to process it and to get yourself under control before calling your attention again with the softest and most gentle pull of just the warmth of his hand on yours. You signed deeply, willing all of that oxygen to fill your lungs and power your brain well, and after what felt like several inescapable seconds passed you looked up into his face. 
He was watching you, no words on his lips and a slow and steady blinking of his eyes.
You swallowed before you spoke, “I get it,” you said plainly, biting down on your lip once before you continued, “I understand. You don't sleep around. I sleep around. You and I aren’t the same.” 
His lips parted and his eyes rolled over his face once before they sank back down heavy inside of yours. He inhaled a breath, clearly ready to counter your words. You knew you were misinterpreting his meaning. It wasn't even as if he’d called you a slut or anything, but goddammit that recent discovery of his. Him having found your 20-pack of condoms in your bag; you couldn't help but compare them to the single 5-pack he brought which he probably never even had any intention of using in the first place when you had every intention of using some of those condoms on this retreat. You would be goddamned if you didn’t get laid at least once on this trip. It had been so long for you, that you needed something from someone that made you feel desired and attractive to another human being. 
“You know,” he was speaking, his eyes had drifted closed and he was having trouble getting the words out again. Maybe he was about to tell you he was on his way to pray for your forgiveness for being such a slut. 
“You already know how I feel about you,” he whispered and pulled his eyes open. 
You looked at his face for a moment before your eyes wandered over the space above his head; giving the smallest head shake as a reply. Not really. He hated you for one minute. He laughed at you and teased you another minute. He made you ramen and tasty honey tea to soothe your upset stomach and beat you mercilessly at Monopoly but his cold hard facade fell apart when you teased him back. He was a mystery to you, whenever you thought you had figured something out about him, he would pull out the rug from under you and swear that no matter how desperate you were for it he would specifically not ever sleep with you. You felt that same familiar pain in your stomach flare up again. You hissed through it and inhaled a small gasp, doing your best to keep your reaction under wraps. 
His eyes narrowed and he dropped his chin, “you must know,” he said again, “you already know.” 
You must have flinched somewhere in your face. Those knowing eyes of his caught it and his head ticked as his eyes moved over you again. 
“How could I know anything?” You were beginning to feel like you should go lie down. You even felt a tiny bit dizzy the more you stayed here just withstanding this. Maybe a warm shower would help. 
“Sara told you. You know everything.” he threw his head back and looked up at the ceiling above his head. He had a sort of exasperated expression on his face now and you tried to focus on this conversation but you’d already been through enough of it. 
What had Sara told you? She had been so excited about every little interaction between the two of you that her words had been too exaggerated and overly dramatic to be able to trust what she said. Your mind flew through her words to you about him. About him saying how pretty you were. So what if you were pretty. The man hated you. He hated you. Her words, were a distant memory now even though it had only been a couple of hours since she said them. 
‘The way he looks at you -- If I didn't know that he was desperately in love with you, I’d think he was trying to set you on fire with his eyes -- he was desperately in love with you -- he is desperately in love with you.’
It was impossible. Sara was wrong. This man did not love you. He couldn’t love someone like you. 
Doh Kyungsoo had just rejected you for the third time now. The first when he stood you up on the date, leaving you to stew in the rejection, publicly calling you out amongst your best friends about it, basically ridiculing you again and again for your stupidity; how dare you really think someone like him could ever actually be interested in someone like you. The second rejection was shallower, the way he treated you when he found out you were here with him. You had the audacity to show up here and play pretend like you belonged here beside him; going so far as to reject even your offer of friendship, the lowest form of acquaintance and even that he didn't want. And now, reminding you of just how little he thought of you. 
He didn’t sleep with people he wasn’t in a relationship with. You’d offered yourself so easily to the man, practically begged for it but again, you received another rejection. 
Wasn't there a point in which you should give up on this? 
“I don't know anything, Kyungsoo. I don't even know you, remember? We never really even met each other.” You said it with such finality that his lips closed up and he pulled his head back. He seemed taken aback by the force with which you said those words to him. You stood up, done with this. There was only so much you could take. That surprised look on his face from earlier had flattened out and he was staring ahead of himself, not looking up at you. 
You stood there looking down at him for much longer than your pride should have allowed. Watching him staring ahead of himself with his silent lips and his bright red ears, his chest heaving up and down as if all of the emotions bubbling just below the surface of him could ever presume to break through that thick outer shell of a man who keeps everything inside when he should have just let it out. Goddammit Kyungsoo. But he wouldn’t move. He wouldn’t explain and he sure as hell wasn’t about to try any more than absolutely necessary with you. You’d been the one to put yourself out there again and again for this man. You felt let down. 
“I’m going to shower and lie down for a while.” 
You took the first steps to leave, to walk past him and you’d made it three whole steps toward the door when you felt the warmth and strength of his hand wrapped tightly around your wrist, pulling you back. He pulled you back roughly. You had been moving forward with such a momentum that the break in your stride caused you to stumble backward and you yelped out in surprise finding yourself pulled into him, pulled to where he still sat uselessly in that chair and the rough yank on your wrist sent you moving until you collided with a resisting barrier.
You stumbled on your feet and you bounced against him and the second you collided with him you felt the strength of his arms wrapping tightly around your waist. You felt the push of his firm chest hit against your thighs and in your belly you felt the point of his nose as he buried his entire face within your shirt, just below your ribs deep, within the softness of your belly. It tickled uncomfortably but you felt too stunned to do anything. You looked down in shock, seeing only the top of his head, his soft black hair fell into the fabric of your shirt and from his mouth somewhere you heard the softest moan that reverberated through your body. 
For lack of anywhere else to put them you rested your hands on his shoulders and you heard and felt him make another sound, a rough growl from his chest sounded out into your skin, buzzing into the skin of your stomach and his hands around your waist tightened to uncomfortable levels. He inhaled a deep breath from somewhere in the center of you and you found some semblance of some words to say. 
“Kyungsoo, what,” you began but his hot exhale warmed you on the exit and sent goosebumps cascading down your spine, taking whatever words you thought you could speak. After several breaths he lifted his face, propping his chin right against your skin to look up into your stunned and confused face. 
“What are you doing?” you managed. You felt too blindsided for more.
“Get to know me then,” he whispered up into the air and you wiggled against the tightness you felt in his arms matching the crazed look you saw in his eyes. He did not loosen them any, “get to know me, until you understand how I feel about you.” 
This didn’t feel real. It was impossible that this was happening. Was he serious? 
Your mind was spinning. You couldn’t reconcile the two versions of Doh Kyungsoo you were witnessing. The desperate way he clung to you told you one thing and yet, so much bad had already happened to tell you the complete opposite. This version clearly hadn't listened to a damn thing the other one had just told you. This one didn’t know about the no sex before commitment rule, the one that had his chance and squandered it, humiliating you in the process. But as tightly as you were wound here within his arms; you could feel your body responding to him all over again. You’d already been too affected by him before.
His eyes were looking up at you and you could just barely make out the tiny pout on his lips that was hiding within the fabric. 
Maybe he was drunk. Maybe that mug he had been sipping from had been full of whiskey instead of tea and this man was off his head right now. 
“What are you talking about?” 
He was moving with the question you hung into the air above his head. You could feel the slow way he moved his face, pressing himself against the softness of your belly again, breathing you in slowly and deeply as if every bit of sanity had simply left his body and this was a madman whose only purpose was to drive you as crazy as he was. 
“You know for someone who doesn’t want to fuck me, you are doing a terrible job of letting me leave this room.” 
Your own bluntness surprised you but you’d expected him to wake the hell up and release you so you could go take care of this problem he’d caused. 
“I never said I don’t want to fuck you.” He whispered it with his face hidden deep within the skin of your belly but the words echoed inside of you, hitting you hard with their heavy impact. 
The man was a menace. He’d just turned you down only to do this to you? You felt so turned on you almost couldn’t keep upright.  
You braced both of your hands on his shoulders and you pushed against him hard, pushing your hips backward too until he got the message and loosened his hold around you. The release allowed you to take a step back. His hands still lingered around you and you even felt one of his hot palms lying right over your ass, having slipped down from your waist he didn’t seem to be in too big of a hurry to take his wandering hands off of you. 
“Sorry, sorry,” his immediate apology told you that he knew exactly what sins he had committed against you, “I’m not in my right mind.”
You reached behind you and grabbed his hand off of your ass and brought it back around, dropping it down on his own lap. It landed with a flop in his lap and his eyes pulled deservedly down as he took on a much more sheepish expression in his face. You couldn’t tell if it was genuine. 
“You say one thing and do another, Doh Kyungsoo.”  
You felt ready to snap. “You say we won’t have sex, and that’s fine. I’m fine with that,” you said through wild eyes and even though you managed to get the words out, it felt like a lie. You weren’t fine with that. This hot piece of ass needed to figure himself out and in a hurry because you weren’t sure how much more of his torture you could take. 
“You seem fine with it,” you heard him mumble under his breath and your eyes widened as you lifted your eyebrows and looked at him. He lifted a hand and waved it lightly, “Sorry, continue.” 
“I was fine with it until you,” you lifted your arms and wrapped them around your body, doing a speed-run pantomime of him grabbing you around the waist, hugging you tightly and you even ran your fingers over the entire length of his face lightly, jumping back in pure frustration, “did all that to me, Kyungsoo. What the fuck?” 
The man who sat in front of you with his forearms crossed strategically over his lap ‘just so’ dared to smile at you. It was a tiny smile but you lifted a finger and pointed right at his face with a frustrated gasp. Again his smile, impossibly, widened.
“I am going to go take a shower. And I am going to lie down.” These words came out in a low growl. “I better not see you standing at that bathroom doorway.”
You’d spun on your heels for the second time to walk away from this man and you nearly screamed when you felt his hand reach for you again. This time he was standing up and you lifted your own hand in an 'I swear to god, give me a reason’ pose, enjoying how quickly he flinched away from you. 
“Wait, wait” he quickly spoke, not wanting to get smacked. You decided then and there that you weren’t above doing it. The memory of last night's tit punch was still fresh in your mind and you were feeling almost crazy enough to do it. 
“Just wait, goddammit,” he had the nerve to sound annoyed. He actually reached up and grabbed your raised hand and carefully brought it back down. “Come back later. Later tonight, give me like two hours maybe.” 
“What happens in two hours?” your eyes narrowed and your lips pouted just a little bit with the suggestive tilt of your head as your mind whirled through the possibilities. Did he just need two hours to decide that maybe you were worth a round or 20 of pressing your back into your mattress, or maybe his mattress? Hell, four mattresses were lying over there on the floor where the movies had been showing, you were not that picky. Literally this table here would suffice. Your face must have betrayed your filthy thoughts because he squeezed your hand and you heard a tiny laugh break free from him. 
He was laughing through his words, “Dinner. Just dinner with me. God, will you relax, please?”
His proposal sounded promising. Your eyebrows were lifted in curiosity without you even realizing it you eked out a tiny question for him.
“Like
a dinner date?” This sent a strange wave of panic through you. The tiny smile on his face and the little hum he made as a response sent butterflies flying. You felt at odds with the strange burst of nerves. The idea of having an actual date with this man was, well — you’d never once considered a re-do with him. Back then you’d been so offended, so humiliated, and so angry that the last thing you wanted was to give him a second chance. After a while, you’d even run out of any desire for him to explain himself for what he did back then. 
Perhaps a make-up for that botched blind date all those months ago that started all of this trouble was the kind of thing your heart craved deep down inside. You suddenly felt nervous. Sex was one thing but a date with him? Sex was just physical but starting this over again, a date with Kyungsoo felt too vulnerable. Why was that so much scarier to you? 
What if he didn’t show up? 
Wait, he was trapped here and he was the one doing the cooking. Plus if he didn't show up, you knew where you could find him. You’d beat down the door and kick his ass as long as he was hiding away in one of the rooms here that didn't have any spiders. 
His eyebrows lifted and the smile he was wearing on his lips was gone. 
“You don’t want to?” He asked the question and left his lips hanging open. You could see on his face that despite the false bravado he wore when he proposed the date, to begin with, he also was feeling a lot of the same nerves about it that you felt. His focus on your face was flighty, not quite able to commit to solid eye contact with you with this heavy question handing in the air like this. 
“Okay,” you finally answered in a whisper and you closed up your mouth and nodded your head up and down twice. 
Kyungsoo’s eyes watched your face and you caught him mirroring the same head nod. “Okay,” he also whispered. 
You nodded again and he was quiet as he looked at you, eventually looking away from you and looking around the kitchen space with a small exhale of air through his mouth. He didn’t move, but what was even worse was that you also did not move. You weren’t sure how to do it.
Oh. Oh no. Oh no this was awkward. Did you just say goodbye and walk away? Did you give him, like, a high five or maybe lean into him for a hug, God that would be terrible, Imagine? A hug, thanks buddy, thanks pal, thanks for letting me make out with you, sorry to freak you out when I got too into it and touched your boner because apparently that is a no-touchy zone, I did not get the memo about the boner. Should you lean in and give him a kiss on the cheek? How did you leave this situation with at least one-fourth of your dignity, an acceptable amount for someone with your history of humiliating yourself, still intact? 
The kiss on the cheek might be okay, right? His cheeks were soft and his skin was smooth. You took the smallest step into him and you leaned in for it, but oh god, he was moving already. You leaned at the exact same moment that he spun around on his feet and began to walk away from you toward the doorway that led toward the bunk beds, which would have been completely fine except for the fact that he had seen you beginning to lean into him right before he moved. He had seen you move, he had seen you lean, but his feet had already stepped, his body had already begun the exit process and what resulted was a terrible, awful, awkward time in which he stopped walking abruptly and turned back around to face you, halfway toward the doorway, stuck somewhere in the middle of this kitchen with him again facing you and neither of you wanting to explain to each other with words why the journey to the exit had been halted so abruptly. 
“No,” you shook your head back and forth. His face was pink again. “No, just go. You already ruined it.” 
“What were you going to do?” 
“Doesn't matter. It’s over.” You sidestepped him and moved quickly through the space, placing your handle on the kitchen door and pulling it open. You hurled yourself into the darkness of the hallway, feeling just a tiny bit of irritation at the realization that you could still hear the sound of his footsteps very clearly. He hadn’t stayed behind in that kitchen but he seemed to be following you down the hallway toward the room with your bunks. 
“You were leaning, what were you leaning for?” 
“Why are you following me? I have things to do. Alone, Kyungsoo.” You emphasized the last bit while looking directly into his eyes and he was fighting his smile a little but he didn’t seem to stop following you until you reached the door to the bunks and stopped to look at him with your hand on the door handle. 
“I just need to get my bag. Then you can have the place to yourself.” He was already pushing past you, rushing through the room toward the bed in the back and he was grabbing a black duffel that he slung over his shoulder and he made quick work of the distance with his quick walking reaching the space in the doorway that you still occupied in no time. 
When he was back at your side you moved inside the room to give him room for his exit but before he disappeared through the doorway you caught an abrupt shift in his balance. When he was close enough he leaned into you and pressed his soft lips against your cheek, lingering against your skin for one second too long before he pulled back again and looked into your eyes. Admittedly, you hadn’t expected that at all and you had closed your eyes halfway through the lingering part and you had to act quickly to open your eyes up in time so as not to miss the smoldering look part. 
“Now, wouldn’t that have been awkward to do back in the kitchen when I was going to come all the way over here the whole time?” 
You’d opened your mouth and inhaled a breath to respond to him. You would have lied and told him that you weren’t going to kiss him in the kitchen, or that he was imagining things again, or maybe you would lie and say you took it back and you didn’t want to have sex with him ever. He had already disappeared and the heavy door slammed shut before you had a chance to think of a clever comeback. 
Links: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8
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n3kk1tty · 6 months ago
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This Fanfic is 18 and up only. It contains mature themes not suited for younger readers.
Sinclair Daughter x Thomas Hewitt
~~~~Sweet Heat~~~~~
Word Count: 7,560
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Your father's loved you so dearly. They loved you to a level of extreme that was only amplified after the ambrose accident that led you to this new life. Now that you had a partner this love was a difficult thing to navigate around with your secret desires and Hobbies. To say your father's wanted you to stay pure till the last bell chimes on your wedding night was an understatement. Bo was always glaring down Tommy or telling you to split from each other if he caught you kissing Tommy or hugging too long. While Lester damn near kept you busy to keep you from having any alone time to get into trouble and Vincent tore your bedroom door down when you had shown Tommy your bedroom one day.
You were a grown woman and this habit pissed you off as a teen but now as an adult more capable than your parents at times all it did was make you annoyed. While the boys could have porn mags, flirt with victims, drink and do whatever you had to be miss Mother Teresa. You remember how Bo used to and still does stop you from helping with kills even though you're effective at it. You snap the neck of your designated meat rabbit placing its body in the pile next to you as you fume in your shed. I mean even the Hewitts at this rate we're joining in your father's over bearing nature. Luda Mae always tells Tommy to behave and to wait for your wedding night while Hoyt was a pervert who teased you constantly making you madder than hell. Your perfect mask was falling off your face day by day as your urges grew.
You start butchering your pile utilizing every last piece of your little friends as you could trying to calm yourself. You loved Thomas Hewitt more than anything in the world and you had been dating for six months now. What you could not stand was the purity culture swarming you everyday at home. How could you keep yourself off of that sweet muscular man. He was so easy to rile up to but everyone kept getting in your goddamn way. You hid porn mags and such in Tommy's room to give him ideas and a basic sex ED, you hid condoms everywhere in case something happened. You even went so far as to corner Tommy alone as much as you could but it never worked. Either your father's or the Hewitts got in the way of your needs and you couldn't take it anymore.
That night you had to get away to your hiding place. You had a burning need in yourself and if you didn't have your urges satisfied soon you were gonna strip your boyfriend bare in the Texas open dirt roads and jump his fucking bones there. That or you were going to tie your father's upside down by there toes. Sliding open your window you make work to climb out onto the roof carefully before sliding down the support beams of the house before running off into the dark. You couldn't use your flashlight or make much noise till you made it to where you stashed your dirt bike. It was something you picked up with extra money you made at the farmers market. You knew your dad's would kill you if they found out you had one or what you liked to do in your free time so what was the point in showing them.
You couldn't show Tommy neither even though you loved him mostly because the boy treated you like you were glass but nothing was faster through the county fields then your dirt bike and oh boy was it fun to ride. Your father's may have wanted you to be mother Mary incarnate but really what girl raised by murderers isn't gonna be wild. Back in Louisiana you lived a whole double life. Sneaking out, switching out of dresses made from your Dad Vincent into rock t-shirts and short shorts. Hell sometimes just to beat the heat running around in your shorts and a bikini top. You had a dirt bike back home you stole from a victim and it was so fun to ride when you moved to Texas you just had to get one to ride the dirt trails.
You couldn't let your dad's catching you like this though. If Bo knew you got a tattoo behind his back he'd tan your hide into next week I mean you've been hiding it since you were a teen but he still would. You smile as you ride away to your hiding spot remembering your teenage years fondly as you jump dirt hills hollering in joy. Sneaking off on weekends when victims stopped by to go hangout with your friends a town over. Drinking, smoking weed, listening to rock music and the occasional hook up while horror movies played in the background. You were a real switch up and I mean you still were hiding your wild side from everyone in hopes to keep up with the sweet southern girl aesthetic so you could stay with Tommy. You pull up to the run down house parking your bike before looking over the little river and old farm house in the moonlight. You hoped when you and Tommy got married you two could take over this little home.
You had been working on this house you found for your future with him but you knew you couldn't tell anyone. Especially not with all the shit you were hiding that you either stole from victims or bought with your own cash. The little room with a window AC, TV, and all your precious contraband. Slipping on your band shirt you look over your porn movies trying to see what one you should pop in tonight. Hell you probably just gonna pop in a horror movie instead and just sit back with rock music blaring you were so pissed off. Pulling out your stash of weed from the recent victim Ludae Mae had butchered which had just happened to disappear. You smile, flicking your lighter to your blunt as you feel your worries float away. 
Maybe Tommy would still love you even knowing you weren't the perfect girl everyone thought you were. You knew your dads would kill you though. Mostly for the smoking, drinking, and tattoo because they didn't want their little girl ruined. Bo hated the idea of you having sex and you knew it as he refused to give you the sex ED talk yelling at you constantly no boys and to stay pure. Poor Vincent had to hand you sexual education books and repeatedly told you not till marriage. Lester told the twins when he caught a boy flirting with you when he went to pick you up from school. Had to have a big fight about letting you stay in highschool after that one. You let out a puff watching the screen on your bean bag chair as you thought. You always presented yourself as the perfect daughter / future wife. Cooking, cleaning, being polite and helpful.
You even praised God and dressed the way you knew your dad's would be approve. Guess you had plans originally to go out in the big world on your own like a real rockstar and now here you were a boyfriend and pretending to be someone you weren't. You grab a throwing knife next to you, throwing them at the poster on the wall.  Everyone else got to go killing doing what they wanted but you were stuck in the kitchen with Ludae Mae. You loved the woman but how would she react to how you were right now. Slumped down in a chair smoking away as you tossed knives with terrifying accuracy while heavy metal blasted in the background. You just didn't want to hurt Tommy. Didn't want him to stop loving you but you couldn't bare this lie anymore. 
You hadn't even realized you passed out on the bed by accident till the afternoon sun finally woke you up. All those early mornings to pack Lester's lunch and cook him breakfast caught up to you. What would you do? Tommy usually stopped by in the morning to see you and you were nowhere to be found by anyone. You couldn't show up in last night's dress, you'd be found out as you never wore the same dress two days in a row. You panicked rushing out the room like the devil was on your heels. Throwing on your climbing boots before forgetting you had contraband on you. It would take a hell of a day to explain but maybe you could sneak back in before getting caught. Hell maybe your dad's just thought you were sick or already left. Fuck! It wasn't farmers market day and your truck was still there. 
You sped on your dirt bike over the rough Texas terrain hoping you'd be able to explain yourself somehow. Didn't take long to get back but sneaking in was sure gonna be tricky. You hid your beloved bike in its usual spot before army crawling through the long grass. Infiltration was gonna be tough especially if you had everyone searching for you. Being spotted in your outfit now and realizing you still had a hunting knife and blunt on you, it felt like you were fucking Rambo sneaking on to your own property. You made it to the shed not having to fight any snakes in the way. You could hear your father Bo on the porch cussing up a storm to where you could be sending Thomas to find you. 
Damnit the Hewitts excuse was compromised and so was the sneaking back into your room. Bo didn't like busting into your room but he would if he thought he needed to. You manage to shift a panel and squeeze into your shed without anyone noticing you entering into the small wooden building. You begin stripping down to your underwear rummaging through the little building for your emergency clothes. You didn't even notice the door opening or closing as a tall silent figure stood in shock at the sight. Thomas stood absolutely still looking at the sight in front of him. He had been in a panic all morning searching for you with Bo and Vincent as they couldn't find you in your room. 
You hadn't come down and made breakfast so they thought you were sick as you always wrote notes if you were leaving to town. When Vincent looked though the front window your truck was still there. Maybe you had gone to the Hewitts by foot with Tommy, you had been doing that recently even if they didn't like it. Nope, Tommy showed up with flowers for you like every morning but no you in site. You weren't spotted or heard of from for hours and as a last ditch effort Tommy went up to check the shed you processed and raised your rabbits and chickens in. What did he see when he opened the door. His beloved girlfriend standing in nothing but her undergarments searching through boxes frustrated mumbling with strange outfit next to her.
The boy didn't know what to do but silently stood there breathing as he took in every curve of you. Your soft skin glowing as excitement replaced worry in his body each time you bent over a plump ass practically being shoved in his face. Thomas couldn't stop himself as his curious lustful eyes bathed over your form, taking special notice of the artwork on the side of your ribcage. Tommy didn't know you had a tattoo but something about it aroused him. You never even mentioned it then again he never saw you this undressed. He lumbered over to you gently grabbing your sides to help you reach the top shelf as he pressed his body against yours. This kind gesture was met with a yelp and almost a knife in his face from his beloved.
“ Jesus Christ Tommy I almost took your eye out. You have to knock first before surprising a girl. “ Your heart raced in your chest as you hopped back on the bench trying to push your hunting knife away not realizing how exposed you are. Thomas of course signed to you his complaints. “ We couldn't find you. Where have you been? Why are you so bare? “ Your face warms as a slight embarrassment overwhelms you before a devilish idea crosses your mind. You didn't want to lie to Tommy anymore and if you wanted to take it to the next level you could right now but first was to try covering your ass before your dads found out. “ Well I could tell you the truth but it may ruin my surprise for you. “ You trace your fingers along Tommy's chest as you hook your legs around his waist pulling him in. You could immediately feel his length growing against you straining in his pants as you pulled his face in dangerously close.
Oh you were playing with fire but this was the exact moment you were waiting for. “ Truth? Surprise?” Thomas sloppily signed as you kissed at his face rubbing your hands along his chest making it hard for him to think or question what he's discovered apon. “ Do you love me Thomas Hewitt? “ The giant man shook his head pushing his body further against you on the desk trying to gain more friction. “ Will you love me no matter what my secrets maybe?” Your hands somewhat shake as you lace your hands in his hair whispering into his ear. The man makes an agreeing noise back grabbing your body in close, whining at you to push things further. You desperately want to but you can hear Bo shouting outside getting louder.
You pull Tommy in quick whispering into his ear, exciting him. “ Tell them I was hunting that fox that keeps getting in the coup and I got some blood on my clothes if they question you. Then later me and you can continue this my love. Can you go fetch me new clothes now Tommy? “ You place a big kiss to his face, mumbling you love him before shooing him out the shed before popping your head out to scream at your father. “ Will you stop screaming dad your gonna wake the dead! “ Bo and Vincent run towards the shed as Tommy runs off to fetch you a new outfit. You keep just your head out and refuse to open the door. “ And where have you been young lady! You've been missing since before the sun's been up. “ Bo trys pushing on the door but you fuss at him. “ Unless you wanna see your grown daughter bare as the day I was born you better not open this door. I was out chasing damn foxes in the coups again. “
The pair stop getting flustered before questioning you. “ And why would you not make breakfast and why are you naked in there? You and Thomas better have not been fooling around before marriage. I'm not above putting holes in him. “ Bo practically growls as you stand your ground. “ We were worried. “ Vincent signs. “ I chased that thing pretty far out. I was gonna make breakfast but saw something in the coup again. Then while chasing it I got blood and dirt all over my dress. By the time I came home I fell asleep at my bench and didn't realize I forgot to put my spares back in the shed. “ Vincent seems worried at the falling asleep portion of the story but Bo is standing his ground at the fact he just saw Thomas run outta the shed like his ass was on fire.
“ And what about that boy running out of this shed like the devil was on his tail. He didn't see you naked did he? You two weren't fooling around were you. “ You whistle to yourself as Bo gets angry before you push on the door again stopping him from entering. “ Not like I wanted to get seen in the nude before my wedding night. Someone was screaming at him to find me and we'll he busted in while I was trying to find my spares so for your information dad my dear boyfriend did see me in my bra and panties but I don't think gods gonna smite us for an accident. “ Bo is seeing red as his face heats up as Vincent as well he is getting flustered and angry.
Before the two run off to skewer poor Tommy your lovely boyfriend shows up flustered as can be trying to pass a sundress to you. The two fathers glare him down, yanking it from him before they hand it to you as you shimmy into it before opening the door confidently. You smack Bo and Vincent in their sides as you walk off into the house. “ Would you two stop trying to murder my boyfriend? There's only one way Luda Mae is getting grandchildren and it ain't gonna be no stork. I've cleaned enough of your porn mags up to know you two aren't saints dads. “ The two look away embarrassed to be so confidently called out in their perverted nature by their precious daughter.
“ We can't help, we want to keep you as our little girl forever. “ Vincent signs following you into the kitchen as you prepare lunch. “ I'm 25 dad. I'm a healthy woman with working reproductive systems. Y'all may not wanna hear it but when a man and a woman love eachother very mu-” Vincent throws his hands up covering your mouth as you continue on your rant while Bo plugs his ears and Thomas looks away in embarrassment. “ You know what, me and Tommy are going on a much needed date alone tonight and I'm not hearing protest from no one. I can't marry him if I never get alone time with him and I deserve personal space without my father's being in it. “ Bo gets up to demand to be able to spy on you to but you wave a kitchen knife in his face.
“ I said I'm going on my date! I am your daughter, I got your temper and you know it. Now unless you wanna be cooking your own meals and cleaning for a month.” Bo freezes in his place, he knew damn well you would do it. He and his brothers have been pampered since their little girl took up cooking and even doing the daily chores without complaint. It could be worse because Bo remembers when you were a teenager and you two got into a nasty fight and he was still eating stuff in the fridge you cooked for Lester and Vincent after saying you weren't cooking for him. You had set a decoy out for him and put laxatives in the pie you made and he spent the whole day praying to the porcelain throne. Bo stiffens up before huffing out a fine and taking his plate of food from you. “ You didn't put any laxatives in this to prove a point. “
Bo says as he stands in the door of the kitchen thinking of a way to spy on you. “ Don't give me any reason to. “ The man stiffens before sauntering off to go scheme while Vincent nervously eats his plate with Thomas and you at the table. After you finish cleaning the dishes from lunch and getting dinner ready for the oven you pull Thomas in close knowing damn well Vincent and Bo weren't gonna let you off the hook that easily. “ Tommy honey I need you to go outside to the shed and get my things, take them to the truck and get inside. I'll be out shortly. “ Thomas signs to you where Vincent couldn't possibly see. ‘ What will you do? ‘ You kiss the man on the face before sending him off on his task just answering him back with a smile.
You knew Bo called Hoyt earlier to talk about your date and that even if you tried to get privacy they would still follow you. There was only one place in Travis county where neither family could interfere easily and you knew it. May be hard to get Tommy and you out there at this rate but if you played it smart you could buy you some time. You were able to snag Bo’s keys while cleaning and I mean kicking his keys under the couch wasn't so hard since you usually kept them up on the key rack since your father's except for Lester couldn't be bothered to keep track. Speaking of which you called Lester earlier to see when he'd be home so you had a small window to get the hell out of Dodge. As you were doing your finishing touches Bo stopped you as you stood by the towel closet.
“ Did you really chase an animal out the coup again this morning? I went out to check and all your creatures look fine to me. ‘cept some digging at the bottom “ You freeze knowing that this could be the moment you get caught with your scheming and double life but you think for a moment before answering your beloved father. “ I'd have no other reason to be running out in the crack of dawn in the dark unless you're saying I'm chasing shadows. Maybe if we got a guard dog like I wanted I wouldn't be passing out in the shed exhausted from chasing pests. “ Bo sighs, patting your head before straightening out his back. “ We got Jonesy, she's a guard dog. “ You laugh at your father's mentioning of Lester's beloved pooch. “ Dad, pretty sure Jonesey counts more as a sausage link then a livestock dog. “
The rough man lets out a genuine chuckle as he shakes his head in agreement. “ Yeah probably should tell Vincent and Lester to stop feeding her table scraps. “ You give a raised eyebrow as he sighs. “ We all should stop giving her table scraps. “ You smile as you laugh with your father before trying to sneak away. “ Hey. Don't go making me grandfather just yet. I was barely ready to be your father.” You smile to Bo before telling him you weren't and that you were going to finish a chore before heading out. Your plan was in motion as you ran off the porch practically jumping through the trucks window to start it before your fathers could follow or protest. Speeding out the drive way as you catch Vincent running to the porch to spot your truck hauling ass off to who knows where.
The twins knew you were going on a date and they figured it would be at the house but now that your car was hauling away in your truck the pair got immediately upset. That Hewitt boy alone with their daughter without the families around only spelt something mischievous going on for the boys. Immediately Bo was yelling for Vincent's to get the keys only to find they weren't on the key rack. None of the pair's keys were Vincent pieces together exactly what their sneaky daughter had been doing earlier when she went to clean up before leaving. Bo runs to his room to grab his gun. He was pissed but what did he find when he opened his gun case. No fucking gun that was sure. Your sneaky ass had hid all the guns in the house and the keys. “ That little shit swindled all our shit from under our noses. I'm fucking calling Hoyt to stop em. “
You laughed loudly as you headed down the dirt road towards your destination. “ Tommy I know this may be hard to believe but I haven't always been the beacon of innocence y'all may think I am and if we're gonna take our relationship further I think at least you get to see the real me. “ The man tilts his head. ‘ I love you. Just you. ‘ You smile to him as you make note of the beat up cop car chasing behind you. “ Hey Tommy Hun you don't happen to like rock music do you? “ Thomas shakes his head in confusion. ‘ Haven't listened before. Mama doesn't like. ‘ This causes you to chuckle. “ Well there's two secrets of mine you can know. Hold on darlin I gotta get Hoyt off our tail. “ Tommy panics at this as his anxiety creeps in with the rock music now blaring on the stereo.
You look for an opening in the fencing along the road before you spot one and take off into the dried out landscape around you. The house you hung out at the road was overgrown anyway so taking a little short cut won't hurt. Thomas grabs onto the door handle for dear life as the car starts rattling on the rough terrain rock music blaring in the background as you outrun Hoyts dinky cop car before it inevitably gets stuck on the rough terrain. “ Well that should buy us the night. Wonder how long it will take them to find their car keys under the couch..” Thomas looks at you bewildered, mumbling out noises in protest but you look at him smiling and he can't bring himself to continue. It doesn't take you long to finally make it to your hideout.
Taking measures to hide the truck in the old garage just in case they find their keys early or Lester gets back. ‘ We're in trouble. ‘ Tommy signs as you open up his side of the truck for him as he frowns at you. “ Probably but sometimes you have to stir up trouble to get what you want. “ You try to saunter off but your masked boyfriend picks you up, trapping you. ‘ go back now. ‘ You frown at this statement from him there was no way you were going home now. You didn't care how much trouble you were in. You had been good for far too long doing what everyone said it was time for you to be selfish. “ I'm not going back Tommy. I came here to get alone time with you. “ The man freezes contemplating what he should do before you start rubbing on his shoulders like earlier in the shed.
Soft doe like eyes pleading with him to stay as he tries to remain firm on his stance of going back but the minute your warm hand touches his cheek fiddling with his hair it was all over. He let's out a sigh as he gives in to your demands and you explode with glee peppering him with kisses and telling him how much you loved him. Thomas couldn't say no to his future wife. He wasn't used to being so openly loved and cared for and you were never afraid to tell him how you felt or to give him such affection. You were his angel on earth and if his angel was leading him into trouble he'd gladly follow. The Texas heat was still very much in the air as the evening sun still hung in the sky. You showed Tommy around the property you had been working on excitedly telling him about the coup and the rooms how you were excited for your future with him.
The boy felt like he was walking on air as he could imagine a life with you while you ran around the building showing him everything. Thomas may not have looked it but he to was getting fed up with the family's needs to butt in. Those strange magazines in his room gave him many wicked ideas and it was getting harder for him to keep his hands off you every time you peppered kisses to his face or hands lingered a little to long on his chest. You finally got out to the little lake running down the porch steps to show him excitedly. The man smiled as he looked at you showing him it before you got the most wicked idea. Before the man could figure out what you were doing you were throwing your shoes off and tossing your sundress to the side. Running down the old boat dock telling Tommy to catch you before you jumped in just in your underwear and bra.
The man stood there whining and fussing at the edge of the dock as he tried to grab you but you just splashed him in retaliation. “ Come on honey the water is nice and cold. If you can't swim the water over here isn't too deep. “ The man takes another try to grab you but you duck under the water swimming away before floating on your back to tease him with your scantily clad form. It takes awhile of coaxing and praise but Thomas finally strips down to his boxers and wades his way in the water so you can take off his mask for him. He's very hesitant about you doing that for him but it wasn't the first time you've taken his mask off. Usually you do it to wipe his face and get him embarrassed but right now all you wanted to do was sit in the cold water with your lover telling him how handsome he was.
Mask off and nothing but the thinnest layer of clothes separating you two as Tommy refuses to let go of your wet form. Gentle kisses and praise flow from your mouth as you just can't stop grabbing at him, whining and noises of content come from your strong lover as it's just you two loving on each other under the Texas sky in the cold body of water. You swear you haven't had a moment alone with each other since the day he asked you to be his girlfriend but now that you finally did get alone time you both would gladly get into trouble again to have it. You tried to teach Tommy how to swim a bit but all you could accomplish tonight was teaching him how to float on his back, you couldn't stop laughing at his red face each time he'd float up with his body exposed trying to cover himself.
By the time the sun started to set you were sneezing up a storm from your little adventure in the water. Thomas sprinted out of the water dragging you along with him in his arms, completely forgetting your clothes behind in the grass as your sneezes concerned him. You were small compared to him. He was scared you were sick from the cold water so he was trying to strip you of your wet clothes and warm you up with a towel in the abandoned house. By the time his worry washed away and the realization hit him what he was doing you were under Tommy in just a towel with his body hovering over you in his boxers. He trys to shoot backwards but you hook your legs and arms around him pulling him in so he can't escape. “ I never told you to stop Tommy. I'm okay with it. Why don't we continue if you want to darlin. “ His breathe hitches before he's nervously crawling further on top of you so scared of what to do next but definitely wanting to continue forward as he presses his face into yours eyes begging for you.
You gently laugh grabbing his face into a gentle kiss which Tommy greedily pushes further into excitement and eagerness growing. You were always so gentle and loving with him your kisses were like honey and he was desperately trying to to taste more. Your hands lace into his damp hair trying to push back to catch a breath but he just kept pushing forward eagerly. You have to completely turn your head to the side to get away to catch your breath leaving a excited Tommy leaning against you whining his member straining in his soaked boxers. “ Honey it's not fair if I'm the only one naked here. “ He instantly gets the message and anxiously goes to pull off his soaked boxers sitting on the bed his hard member exposed to the air precum already dribbling at his red tip.
You gently place your hands on his chest getting your lover to lie back for you as your hand finds its way to his cock. Tommy jumps a bit when he feels your hand wrap around his girth anxiety and excitement mixing. His cock wasn't the lengthiest you've ever seen but my god was it as thick as the rest of him and ready to destroy you if you weren't careful so even if you were excited to get to the main course a warm up was in store. “ Why don't we get warmed up sweetheart. I know you're excited for your first time but if I'm not prepped you may hurt me. “ You flip around to straddle yourself above Tommy's mouth his glazed over eyes staring at your soaking cunt as you feel his breathe eagerly fan over your folds. “ Why don't you use your tongue Tommy and get me ready for you while I take care of you Hun. “
Thomas paused for a minute taking in the sight of your sex before his hands found either side of your ass gripping you tight as he dived right in like a man starved. You yelp at the base of his cock as Tommy leaned himself against the wall dragging you with him as he crudely propped you up so he had better access. His cock throbbed against the side of your cheek as your face was buried in his wild mess of hair around his member by the sudden movement. Your nose filled with his musky and electricity tingled your core as Tommy went at you like a beast, you couldn't help letting out a moan. Propping yourself up the best you could, you kissed along his length mapping his cock with your lips before dragging your tongue from the base to his tip.
As soon as your tongue lapped across his tip Tommy was growling into your cunt hands gripping harder pushing his tongue deeper into exploring your core. Getting your mouth completely around his member was a challenge as you had to fight against Tommy wildly bucking his hips up into your mouth while trying to adjust your throat to his thickness, almost gagging in the process. Eventually you find a rhythm of keeping yourself breathing and not gagging as Thomas practically face fucked you while devouring your cunt until you came on his face repeatedly. You couldn't fight back as you saw stars as Tommy relentlessly licked and sucked at your folds hunting for every last drop of your fluids he could get before he shot thick ropes of cum into your throat like you were nothing but a doll.
Pulling away for air you sucked in as much as you could get pulling yourself from a pussy drunk Tommy. “ Aw you released it all down my throat. Guess we will have to wait for round two Hun. “ Thomas grabs your legs pulling you roughly under him again placing wet sloppy kisses to your face as a low growl comes from his throat and you watch his cock harden again quickly. A laugh escapes your lips as you place a kiss to your lover instantly softening the man's demeanor from intimidating man to whining mess. “ Don't worry Tommy we can go round two. So eager.” You put a long kiss on his cheek. “ So cute. “ You pull out a pack of condoms from under the bed thankful you were smart enough to stash a bunch anywhere you thought sexual activities may occur.
‘ what's that?’ Tommy signs laying beside you playing with your tits as you figure out which condom size would be most comfortable for your lover before deciding a large may just be able to handle his girth. “ It's called a condom Tommy prevents babies before marriage. “ You let Tommy look at the box and open one of them looking at it fiddling with it before his body jolts when you slide one on him. Giving him a few strokes and pouring a hefty amount of lube on you straddle above Tommy preparing to slide yourself on his cock praying that you can walk after this. You sink down slowly feeling yourself stretch around his length as Tommy whines into your shoulder wanting to jerk upwards into you but you growl into his ear.
“ Be a good boy and be patient. I only reward obedient boys. “ Hips colliding with Tommy's you feel his cock fill you completely stretching you to the most you've ever had you kiss at your lovers face telling him how good he feels and how good he is for you. You start bouncing on his cock slowly amping up the speed but you feel Tommys cock thumping inside you as he grunts holding your thighs down as he cums. Thank goodness you had him service you before getting to the main event or you'd be a heavily disappointed woman. You let out a sigh preparing to pull yourself off for the night and just work with your boyfriend later about cumming to quickly but Thomas grabs your hips forcing you down.
He grunts into your ear bucking up into your core making you let out a moan. Tommy takes this as a sign of encouragement and starts ruthlessly bouncing you on his cock lifting your hips up and slamming you back down like you weighed nothing as he grunted and groaned into your shoulder loosing himself in the pleasure. All you could do was moan and desperately cling into his shoulders as he stretches you with out mercy moans and grunts filling the room as erotic squelching noises can be heard from your sexes meeting. Your pussy slickening his cock with your juices as you eventually come undo on his cock before Thomas is pushing you down on the mattress with his full weight pressing his cock in deep into your core. He falls over onto you sweaty bodies clinging together after a such a carnal release.
You look outside to see the sky is dark and the stars are up. “ If we don't get home soon we will really be in trouble.” You try prying Tommy off of you but he grunts in response refusing to let you go. ‘ No ‘ You sigh as you grab his hand, closing it into a fist and forcing him to sign yes which he grunts to. “ Yes. Tommy I know neither of us wanna go to bed alone tonight but my dad's gonna dish a punishment out on me either way and Luda Mae may kill me. “ He lifts his head, staring at you for a second before signing no again and rolling over with you tucked into his chest. A content hum came from him as he placed a soft kiss on your head rubbing your shoulders with his rough calloused hands. You stay like this for a while deciding that if you were to get in trouble that Tommy would keep you safe no matter what if need be.
Eventually you convince the man that it was best to head back just to not cause panic for the old woman who always rooted for your relationship as you had called her earlier in the day to vent your problems of never getting alone time with Tommy. You were able to convince her that it would be good for your young relationship to be able to have alone time together she was the one who sent Hoyt out in his car to go get stuck. With reluctance and a lot of kisses and promises of future perverted endeavors you headed back to home. Though you can't really walk that well with a bow legged stance and limp. Still walking on cloud nine you decide it will be best to have Tommy finally figure out how to drive.
“ That will be our story, we will stick with it. Now that we're on the main road it will be easier.” You kick back in the passenger seat motioning for Thomas to start the car which he anxiously starts up. It took a while to get back but when you finally pulled into the driveway with Thomas anxiously stepping out the car Luda Mae sat on the porch with Vincent as Hoyt and Bo sat besides the pair playing cards. “ There's our eloping love birds. Did you two assholes know it's sundown?” Bo said standing firm as Thomas helped you out the car motioning to the starry sky Hoyt following behind him. “ It took us till Lester got home to get my cop car out the damn ditch what were y'all thinking. “ The pair come to circle around you but Thomas blocks you with his body being extra protective. “ We went house hunting, did some swimming, and I taught Tommy how to drive so that's what took us the most time. “
“ House hunting? “ Luda Mae says standing up from the porch swing were her and Vincent were crocheting. “ Well yes. We wanted to find a house between the two families for when we start our own family. Extra big so all the grandbabies. Sadly the one house was off the roads so we had to off road to get to it. Didn't know we were being followed. “ The men turn to each other trying to make a come back while Luda Mae eyes them down. “ Well you hid our keys and guns young lady don't think you can talk yourself out of that one. “ You raised your eyebrow to the man smiling at your father as you were good at lieing your way outta things. “ Hide your keys? You mean I didn't pick your keys up didn't have time to I was prepping dinner for you. And your gun I did hide because you threatened to put a hole in Tommy for accidentally seeing me in my underwear earlier. I was scared you'd actually do it. “
Luda Mae smacks both the mens arms as Bo glares at you not knowing if you were lying or not. “ If you didn't hide them then were are they! And where is my gun? “ You walk past your father smiling up to him knowing he couldn't do much punishing with no proof. “ Guns in the towel closet up stairs and your keys last saw them on the table so Jonesey may have knocked them under the couch with her tail again. “ Bo turns around following you inside as you motion towards the couch. Vincent signing to you while Bo and Hoyt have Tommy help them move the couch. ‘ I’m upset with you still. I know you hid the keys and planned the car getting stuck. Why?’ You turn to your father both of your hands signing fast as you to have a conversation between you. You and Vincent were always close while you and Bo butt heads Vincent could keep secrets Lester couldn't.
“I’m an adult. I feel like you three are smothering me sometimes. Like if I try spreading my wings or change I'll hurt you. “ Vincent shakes his head signing back as the three men fish the things out from under the couch. ‘ I know about the rock music and biking. What is it I don't know. This isn't fair we share secrets. You are an adult but you're still my child.’  You huff, shaking your head as you pull Vincent around so Bo can't see what you're saying. “ I love you, but I love Thomas too. I love him so much I want to be with him. I can't be his wife if I can't be alone with him. I deserve to be happy and be loved to.“ Vincent sighs, shaking his head in agreement reluctantly before pulling you in for a hug patting your back. He didn't like having to give his little girl away but Thomas wasn't a bad man to give you to. Bo lifts his keys up laughing with Hoyt as they turn to you and Vincent. 
“ Tch. Fine I guess we can finally give her what we sent Lester to get earlier. “ Bo comes over patting your head as you surprise him, pulling him into the hug to which he let's out a grunt. Bo pulls you in ruffling your hair and placing a kiss to your head as he holds you real close. “ Next time don't be a little shit when we're tryna be nice. I know your our kid but you ain't gotta act so much like me. “ With this Lester finally comes into the room with Jonesy holding a small pup in his arms. “ We know you kept asking for one for your critters. Got this little girl for you don't know how good she'll be but here yah go baby girl. “ The rest of the night was spent playing with you and Thomas's new pup as you tried to figure a name out while dodging prodding questions and perverted jabs from Hoyt and Luda Mae. The puppy may not have been a child but you to were sure you weren't gonna have trouble in the future making some. 
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If you enjoy and want more Sinclair Daughter fics let me know. Requests are also open for fanfic ideas I write for slashers and horror villains.
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msbigredmachine · 14 days ago
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New To This - Chapter 15
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MASTERLIST
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An hour after the hour-long ride from Josh’s house, Delilah was still perambulating around town, her mind filled with everything that she was going to say to Andre. She tried to anticipate his every reaction, mentally preparing herself for anything he could throw at her. What she would do if he cried. What she would do if he yelled. What she’d do if he even became violent. Yesterday in his gym, Josh had taught her a chokehold that she could take down people twice her size with, in the ring and in real life. She even came up with a plan for handling his stoic silence. All bases needed to be covered for a decision this monumental.
But before all that, she made a call to her sister, Simone, to ask if she was home. She needed to talk to her first before anyone else. Her friend and co-worker, Tiwa would be at Simone’s too, as she was the babysitter to CJ, Delilah’s three-year-old nephew. Her mother would also be contacted on FaceTime, so Delilah would be killing several birds with one stone.
It was a somber affair, breaking the news to her family. Over a plate of Simone’s comfort food and a pitcher of Clay’s (Simone’s husband) “famous” iced tea, with Grace on the other end of Simone’s iPad propped up on the kitchen table, Delilah sat them all down and laid out everything that had happened with Andre and Josh and what her plans were. As she unburdened herself, the gravity of what was happening to her life began to dawn on her for the first time maybe since this whole thing started. Overcome with emotion, the tears began to fall as she came to terms with the end of her life as she knew it, which included a decade of devotion to the boy she’d loved since she was a teenager. 
Simone and Tiwa sat on either side of her, the latter handing her a tissue, their embrace warm and comforting, their expressions surprisingly understanding. However, her mother did not share the same empathy, and watching her eyes fill with disappointment through the iPad sank Delilah’s heart. 
Grace frowned. “Child, what on earth are you doing?” 
Dabbing her eyes, Delilah shook her head, refusing to be deterred by the negativity. Not this time. “Something I should have done long ago, Mama. Andre and I’s relationship has been falling apart and I didn’t see it until it was too late.”
“From everything you’ve just said, you’re the reason y‘all are falling apart. You were unfaithful to him and threw away a stable life for some
wrestler,” Grace scolded, ever judgmental. “And you've not even told him! This is ungodly behavior from you, Delilah.”
“Mama, stop,” Simone cut in, “What’s happened has happened. Let’s just be there for her and-”
“I do not accept that, Simone. Your sister is behaving like a child.  Your daddy and I did not raise either of you to be so reckless and irresponsible! If he was here-”
“If he was here, he would have supported me no matter what!” Delilah finished for her, more tears falling as the mental and physical exhaustion of telling her truth took its toll. “All I ever wanted since my wrestling journey began was your support and Andre’s, Mama, but neither of you gave it to me and I ended up finding it somewhere else.” Wiping her eyes again, she shook her head, determined to get her point across. “I never meant for this to happen and I’m sorry that it's going to hurt Andre in the process. But I’m not sorry I met Joshua. Ultimately, he helped me reach my goal and I’m forever grateful to him. I don’t expect you to understand. I’m a grown woman, and the decisions I’ve made thus far are mine and mine alone.”
Grace tsked, her nose turned up at the absurdity of this situation. “You have so much to learn about life, my dear daughter. It’s a shame you chose to learn the hard way.” With that, she ended the call, the screen returning abruptly to CJ's grinning face that made up Simone’s Home Screen. 
Blowing out a shaky breath, Delilah pushed away the plate in front of her, feeling sick to her stomach. “Well
that went well,” she murmured sarcastically.
Tiwa rubbed her shoulder and rested her head on the other one. “It’s okay, Dee. She’ll come around.”
“She never comes around,” Delilah scoffed. Her mother was stubborn and strong headed and stuck to her ‘principles’ no matter how flawed and traditionalist they were.
“I’ll make sure she does,” Simone promised, peering closely at her little sister. “You do understand why she’s acting out, right? She’s just worried and wants the best for you professionally and personally.” Simone had the same concerns as her mother, adding to her disapproval of this love triangle her sister had deposited herself in. But the last thing Delilah needed right now was more scolding. “Tell you what, whatever happens with you and Andre, I’ll make the guest room available for you. You can stay here until your move to Orlando. I know CJ will be happy to have his auntie around.”
Letting her big sister’s words sink in, Delilah smiled a watery smile, grateful that she had someone’s unconditional support in whatever she decided. “Thank you.”
“You never need to thank me for anything, Lilah Girl. By the way, what does this Josh boy even look like? I wanna see what the fuss is all about.”
Tiwa swooned and made a show of fanning herself. “Sis, he is six different kinds of fine.”
“For real? Lilah, let me see!”
Chuckling softly, Delilah opened up her phone and found one of his photos with his newly won Intercontinental championship belt. Simone did a double take. “Damn, girl! Tiwa’s right. He’s gorgeous! Do he got brothers? Asking for a friend of course.”
“It better be for a friend,” Clay chimed in from the living room, making them all laugh. “Of course, baby, I'm asking for Tiwa over here!” Simone joked.
Leaving her sister’s home feeling just a modicum better about herself, Delilah reluctantly made her way back to reality. The closer she got to her trailer home though, the confidence diminished and the butterflies in her stomach increased as she struggled to get her emotions in check.
What she was about to do, the words she was about to say, would signal the end of the only romantic relationship she had ever known. She was about to put a definite end to the only life she was familiar with and launch herself face-first into a completely daunting one that she, for all intents and purposes, knew very little about in the first place. It had nothing to do with Josh, and very little to do with Andre. This was about Delilah finally doing something for herself, something she should have done long ago.
If she was honest, she was glad that Andre had gone to that audition. She was glad that he had been called back. She sincerely hoped that he would make it far in the competition and be on TV too. She wanted him to be happy. But more than that, she had been looking for the perfect way out and finally she’d found it. Having him around all the time, working out with her and attending her shows, was supposed to make everything right again. But it hadn't.
The only real purpose the last few weeks had served was to increase her guilt over sleeping with Josh. As much as she told herself that she pushed her lover to the back of her mind, the truth was that their affair was never far from her thoughts. She had nearly confessed to Andre on multiple occasions, but couldn't bring herself to break his heart. His announcement about the Idol callback had given her the perfect cover to blow up.
But she was tired of pretending and feeling guilty. There were more mistakes in her life to come, but she wanted to make them on her own without worrying about someone else's feelings. She owed Andre complete honesty. She needed to finally confess and let him go. She needed to move on and so did he.
By the time she parked alongside the house, she had resigned herself to her fate. As agreed, she would crash at Simone’s house for her final few weeks in Pensacola and deal with the weight of what she had done. And then she would move down south all by herself and move on with her life. She would be okay. Andre would be okay.
Somewhat quelled by this, she stepped through the front door of her house.
Sitting on the couch with his feet resting atop a big cardboard box, Andre sipped from a beer bottle. "I think this is everything," he nodded to the other boxes stacked around the room. "I kept the dishes, but your pots and pans are in there," he pointed toward a couple of boxes next to the kitchen island.
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A numbness settled into her entire body. Opening her mouth and then shutting it again several times, Delilah leaned against the front door and spluttered, "You're kicking me out?"
"You didn't come home. For two days," Andre stated, his voice surprisingly void of anger. "You somehow managed to get it up in your head that I don't give a fuck about you, Dee, but I do. More than you could ever know.” He took another swig of his beer. "The guys left at around one a.m. When you didn’t come back in the morning, I got worried. So I went to Tank’s gym. You wasn't there. Went to Simone’s. Not there, either. Then I remembered the tracker on your bike," he said.
Delilah's shoulders sagged with relief and something else. She knew where this was going. "Andre," she whispered, her eyes brimming with tears.
But he only held up a hand and continued his dialogue. "You took me a long way outta town, babe," he said, "Luckily, I’ve been to this neighborhood a few times for work, so it was easy to get in. I followed the tracker and I found your bike in some fancy new house parked next to a big ol' Escalade. His security system sucks, by the way. I was able to sneak ‘round the back of the house into the backyard, and who do I see in the pool?" Meeting her eyes, he took another drink, his expression hard. “Y’all were too busy to see me standing there, but now I know who you been learnin’ all your little sex tricks from.”
The bile rose in her throat faster than her body could compute. Rushing down the hall and into their bedroom, Delilah emptied the contents of her stomach into the bowl as sobs wracked her body. She had intended to tell him about the affair. She had planned it perfectly on her way back from Simone’s but now her plan had been blown to smithereens.
As she dragged herself to her feet and flushed the toilet, Andre loomed behind her like a shadow, leaning casually on the doorframe. "How long have you been fucking him? Hmm? My guess is since your tryout," he surmised. It was an image he would probably never forget; not just catching her in the act, but it was the look on her face...the freedom, the euphoria...She had never looked that way in all the years they'd been together. It was at that moment that he made his decision to take this long overdue step.
Splashing water over her face, Delilah rested against the edge of the sink, avoiding his eyes. She couldn't look at him, couldn't bring herself to see the accusations in his eyes. Nodding, she sniffled back another sob. 
"I'm so sorry," she managed to choke out when she risked a glance at him through lowered lashes. "It wasn't supposed to be like this."
Andre smirked, shaking his head in disbelief. "You don't just fuckin' cheat on your fiancé by accident, Dee. I know it might be hard for you, but can you at least try to respect me enough to tell me the fucking truth now that I know? He's been in our house. Did y'all fuck here, too?"
"No, of course not!" Like a wounded animal, all she wanted to do was hiss, claw, and bite back at him. She wanted to scream for him to understand, to try to act like an adult for once. But she had broken their engagement. She had been planning a life without him. She had no right to fight back.
Squeezing past him, she glanced into their bedroom. The piles of laundry on the floor were seriously diminished, and the candles were gone. The closet was more than half empty, her clothes and the rest of her belongings gone, probably in one of those boxes in the living room. This was really happening, and she couldn’t bring herself to stop it.
"When I met him, he was just Main Event Jey Uso, ya know?" she started, lowering herself to the bed and then standing again. Sitting felt too comfortable. She didn't deserve comfort right now. "One of the most over guys in the business that I wanted so badly to be a part of. He was really complimentary about my talents. And it felt so good." 
The look on Andre’s face made her wince a bit. She knew how absurd it sounded. She knew that it didn't make sense. But she knew that there was nothing she could say that would sound valid. There was nothing that made her actions right. "Knowing that somebody thought I was good enough to make it, that he wanted me to succeed? It was easy to convince myself that I was just thanking him for having faith in me."
In disbelief, Andre sat his beer bottle on the top of the dresser and crossed his arms. "You couldn't just buy him a thank you card or somethin’? Gift basket?"
"How? We’re broke as fuck!" Delilah argued without thinking, regretting it instantly.
A wry laugh escaped him as he scratched the top of his head. "Right. Our money issues. Of course," he started, biting his lip and shaking his head. "Ya know what? I'm not even gonna do this with you. We've both known this was coming anyways," he sighed, turning back for the living room. “I’ll drive you to Simone’s. You need to get whatever else you got here before you head out.”
Delilah followed him, her legs as heavy as lead, wondering why she felt so hollow. It was what she had wanted. She had the gun loaded and cocked before she ever walked in the door. She guessed it was just hard to accept that she wasn't the one pulling the trigger. "Can I ask you a question?" she spoke up.
Andre opened the door and lifted one of the heavier boxes into his arms, leaning against the wall for support when he looked back. “Might as well."
"Why pretend all this time?" she asked, grabbing the box closest to her before moving toward the door.
Andre stepped onto the porch and spoke over his shoulder, "I wasn't pretending," he grunted, laying the box on the ground and opening his trunk to place the box inside. Resting his hands on his hips, he offered her the first genuine smile she had seen since arriving home. "You forget who you're talkin' to, Dee? I’ve known you for half our lives. When you go off to the most life-changing event of your life and you don't call me at all? I know somethin' is up, okay? You had already decided that you were goin' to Orlando before you ever got home. So what was I supposed to do? Fight you?
"I figured I'd give it a shot. I decided I was gonna try to give it a shot, try to salvage what was left of us. Cuz ya know what?" Tilting his head to the side, he gave her that crooked grin that had always set her heart on fire in the past. "Believe it or not, this ain't easy. It ain’t easy walkin' away from somethin' that's been your life for as long as you can remember. But this has to happen. We ain't been right for a long time, and every time we try to fix it, we fuck it up even more."
For a moment, she thought that she might throw up again. The way that he was shrugging his shoulders made it seem as though he didn't care. But he was right. They knew each other. She could see it in his eyes. He loved her, more than he was ever going to admit in words. "And you don't think that we can co-exist for another couple of weeks?" she asked, unsure of where the questions were coming from. But at the moment, the thought of leaving him hurt more than she could explain. Not Andre, her fiancé, but Andre, her best friend since high school.
"No," he said without hesitation, stepping past her en route to the house to grab the last box. "You need to go, Dee. You need to follow your dreams. I've seen you wrestle, and you shine brighter than a damn diamond. You light up, and the crowd loves you. It’s where you're supposed to be. Not in this house," he explained.
Stepping back over the threshold, she wordlessly helped him carry the rest of the boxes to his truck. Once they were all loaded, she turned and looked at him, slightly amazed by how peaceful all of this was going. "I was gonna leave today," she informed him.
Andre smiled, unsurprised. "I was going to ask you to leave today," he said, "I guess we’re both doing what needs to be done."
At that, a sense of calm filled her beyond all reasoning. She was seconds away from abandoning the union they had worked so hard to maintain, yet both were happier than they had been in more than a year.
Glancing down, she spotted the final piece of her connection to him, the sparkling diamond ring still on her finger. Sighing heavily, she slowly tugged it off her finger and took his hand, pressing it into his palm. Andre locked eyes with her the entire exchange, the sadness, the relief and resignation in his eyes reflecting the emotions she was feeling too.
After rolling her motorcycle onto the back of his truck, Andre opened the passenger's side to help his now ex-fiancĂ©e in before moving to his own side, kickstarting the vehicle to begin the ride to Simone’s house. In the rearview mirror, Delilah cast one last look at her former life, heaving a heavy, cleansing sigh. The first chapter of her new journey had been completed, and despite the bittersweet sensations she was currently experiencing, she couldn't wait to crack on with the next chapter.
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pursuitseternal · 5 months ago
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“An Afternoon in the Park” with 🩇 Batstarion in this special update to “Antics of the Newly Ascended”
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Ascended Astarion x Female Tav | T | 1.7 K
Summary: without their Rogue and his consort, Halsin and Shadowheart wait for Gale to come back from scouting out a Bhaalist ambush in Bloomridge Park. Fortunately, to pass the time, a pair of bats seem to join them, flying around and
 engaging in some unusual behavior for this time of day, according to the Druid.
CW: bat sex, a bit of voyeurism kinda not really, “David Attenborough” Halsin commenting on Nature, yes the nature facts about bats are true, Gale sucks at recon, and Astarion is a smug bastard and a freak
A/N: for Batstarion week’s wild card day. Even though Antics is x reader, this update shifts to 3rd person for narrative purpose. In the Antics world, only Gale and Karlach know Astarion’s ‘other’ form. Until now. Enjoy my offering!
Ao3 link | Masterlist | My Ko-fi
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“Bloomridge park is a curious place for a Bhaalist ambush,” Shadowheart commented, irritated and annoyed.
“Gale was sure he would find them. To think that murderous cultists could abuse the natural beauty of a park,” Halsin shifted his massive weight on his massive legs. “No one speaks for the trees in this city. There is so little space, so little greenery to soothe the soul. It’s small wonder everyone is in a foul mood.”
Shadowheart tapped her toe on the ground, impatient. “This is what we get for sending the Wizard to do the sneaking. That bloody Ascendant Rogue. He might have a palace he wants to inspect and a consort or whatever he wants to fuck in it, but dammit we need our party.” She gave a dramatically offended sigh. “We never should have agreed to give those two the evening off. I wonder what depraved, vampiric horrors they will get into.” Her outburst made Halsin’s scarred face twist in a warm grin.
His warm chuckle was probably too loud for even this public setting, and it made Shadowheart glare up at him. The Druid just shook his head. “It is typical of nature, when one head of the pack is supplanted by the next, the new predator in power will mark his territory and mate profusely. It is not different for Astarion,” he commented, always so sage in tone and smiling. As if he’s seen everything in this world.
“Please don’t call Astarion a predator to his face
 or imply he’s a new alpha or something
” Shadowheart grimaced. “His ego has already grown too inflated to fit his pea-sized, smoothed brain. He already acts like the Elfsong is his palace, don’t add to that Halsin.”
Halsin only chuckled harder, putting his massive, tanned hand on the oak tree they both stood beneath at the edge of the city park. “It is remarkable how nature runs its course, even through the filth and contamination of the city. Seasons change, animals rut, and so life continues.”
Something darted over their heads. Two somethings. A streak of white and a smear of cool grey. They chittered loudly, swarming up the oak tree to cling their hooked fingers and toes into the bark. Ears twitching, wings folded, they seemed to chit at one another, squeaks from the grey and high pitched purrs from the white.
Instantly they caught the Druid’s attention. “See, not even the stain of the city can stop nature
. Although, these two do seem to behave rather curious. This white one
 he seems strangely large for a bat and
 strangely talkative.” The Druid moved closer to the tree, making the grey bat scamper higher in the tree, flying almost out of sight to hide far above their heads.
With a flap of his wings, the white animal was not far behind, landing on top of the other. Toes curled around toes, wings wrapped around her small furry body.
A chorus of two-toned chitters flitted from above their heads, and Shadowheart audibly gagged. “Oh that is disgusting. I have no need to hear or see that sort of
 intimacy.” She almost puked on the last word.
Halsin just laughed. “Like I said, nature will always find a way.” He paused, a look more perplexed than before twisting his scarred smiling face. “It’s just this way of nature is most curious. Bats shouldn’t be out quite so early
 nor is this typical for their mating season.” His thick, bushy brows furrowed. “Perhaps the corruption of the city is altering their natural courses
”
The bats then flew apart, circling the tree. Grey and white blurs passing over their heads noisily. “That white male seems bent on keeping his mate in this tree
”
Shadowheart scoffed incredulously. “Or just over our heads to annoy us,” she sassed. “Perhaps he’s just starved for the attention and requires an audience.”
“I’m not sure bats have that big an ego or a bent towards voyeurism,” Halsin chortled, watching with approval as the bats hung on another branch. “You’ll notice that the bats actually engage in a little foreplay. It’s not unusual for the male to
 ahem
 clean the female before coupling to ensure they are clean of a rival's sperm and
” he smirked sideways at the Cleric, “to warm the female up for another round when they are in heat.”
Shadowheart’s brows shot under her bangs. “Bats sound like better lovers than most people,” she scoffed, looking up to see the bats doing just as the Druid described.
They seemed so
 into it, she noticed with a frown on her lips. Squinting, she watched them, a mess of fur and squeaks and chitters all hidden behind two large white wings. It lasted maybe two minutes before they stilled, a long pink tongue cleaning the face of the little grey bat that hung against him.
The warm smile on Halsin’s face made her roll her eyes so far back in her skull, they could have stuck there. “Where is Gale? For fucks sake, we shouldn’t have let the Wizard attempt to be the sneaky one.” She kept complaining, picking at the ends of her hair strands that had come loose from her braid.
That grey bat rushed right past her, almost buzzing the hair on her head as it zipped up the park path in the direction of the walls at the edge of the gardens. “Hey
” Shadowheart narrowed her eyes, “aren’t those the walls to Cazador’s Palace?” Suddenly, suspicion sank into her gut, just as Gale came down the path, winded and sweaty from the evening heat.
“Whoo,” he panted. “Okay, scouting isn’t technically my area of expertise, but I’m
” he placed a hand on his chest, wincing as he sucked in breath after breath. “Sorry, it took a bit to hustle around the whole park before the invisibility spell wore off.” He swallowed loudly. “I’m sure the great Ascendant would have been faster
”
“And considerably less winded,” Shadowheart grumbled under her breath as she crossed her arms over her plate-armored chest.
“Curious that,” Gale started to lecture, still winded and gasping like a fish out of water, “Astarion can’t get winded
 he doesn’t need wind
 or air
” he let out a long sigh, folding over with hands on knees.
Halsin beat him on the back a few times to help him clear his lungs.
“Right,” Gale finally swallowed and straightened. “While you two were busy enjoying the scenery
”
“Actually we were enjoying nature, yes,” Halsin chuckled warmly. “A lovely pair of bats must be in full heat, which is strange this time of year. What unique colors they were too, a brilliant while and sterling grey
”
A pause of
 recognition fell on the Wizard. An incredulous look dawned on Gale, jaw hanging slack. “You’re kidding me,” he gaped. “Here? Just
 out in the open?”
“Yes,” Halsin glanced up into the tree again. “Most rigorous and enthusiastic I would say.”
“Disgusting,” the Cleric added as she faked wrenching, tongue out as she gagged.
Gale buried his hands in his face, muttering something to himself about ‘when he gets his hands on those two horny idiots’ and ‘they couldn’t keep it in their pants
 or fur
 for one night
’ But before he could spiral into a whirlpool of disgust and secrets, he took a breath. “No matter,” he forced his voice steady. “I’ve counted four Bhaalist assassins in the center of the Park
.”
“Six, actually
”
Oh, that sassy purr, that confidence in honey tones interrupted from behind them as Astarion strolled into the middle of the group, their fearless leader right behind him, blushing and red and unable to make eye contact with the lot of them.
“Well,” Gale squared his shoulders as he rounded on the vampire, “and just how could you be so certain?” His brown eyes glinting with suspicious mischief, his brows cocked haphazardly as he returned Astarion’s cool, sauntering stare. “It’s not like you were here? Not like you were just
 flying around to get a bird’s eye view or anything
.”
“Oh no, of course not,” he crooned, picking invisible dirt off the cuff of his armor. “Maybe you should be grateful we’ve decided to end our evening early. Seems you’re more pitiful at reconnaissance than even I thought possible.” He shifted his body to let Tav into the circle, her face still beet red. “Isn’t that right, darling?”
Gale gave her a scolding, humored look, the kind that said, ‘You should know better
.’
Astarion leaned his face into Gale’s line of sight, narrowing his eyes. “Something to say
 Gale? Or are we going to murder a bunch of murder cultists?”
Halsin looked at Shadowheart, then at the tree, then with a low hum in his throat, he looked to Gale and Astairon staring at one another. “Tav, just how did you enjoy your
 evening with our Rogue?”
“Fine,” she grinned her own fanged smile. “We just figured you needed a bigger party to flush out the Cultists. They are very well hidden, almost impossible to see if not from above
.”
She snapped her mouth shut and blushed again.
Gale just shook his head and laughed. “Oh, not so sneaky Rogue,” he teased Astarion who gave Tav the cheekiest, most devilish leer, one dripping with conceit and self satisfaction.
“Oh
 by my Lady’s name,” Shadowheart covered her eyes as she gagged again. “The bats
 those fucking bats
”
Halsin gave a noise of realization, a wry smile on his face.
“I told him we needed to help survey for the ambush,” Tav muttered.
“And I said, only if she didn’t get caught,” Astarion’s sultry smirk melted with his love, his fingers lifting her chin as she placed an adoring kiss on his full and smiling lips. “It’s not my fault you’re a bunch of freaks who can’t keep their eyes to themselves
”
Shadowheart turned her back, ponytail whipping her own shoulders. “I think I’m going to be sick
”
“For the record,” Gale grinned and wagged his finger in Astarion’s face. “I’m not the one who let out your cute, fluffy little secret, O Mighty Ascendant.”
Astarion scrunched up his nose and grabbed his daggers. “Take out your disgust out on some murder cultists, everyone. Let’s turn someone inside out, shall we?”
Before they dispersed into the Park, the Druid gave one more chuckle. “It is rather fluffy and cute for a wild form to shift into,” Halsin chimed in with sage tones in his deep voice.
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captainn-hook · 8 months ago
Text
Character analysis on Prince Sidon (BOTW vs TOTK)
One thing I love about totk is how the game addresses Sidon’s trauma.
In botw you see how desperate he is for his father’s approval, it’s like Mipha set an impossible standard for dying not only for her domain and her people but for the whole kingdom of Hyrule. In their father’s eyes, she’s the perfect child, not only in personality but also in the way she’s honoured her family. Sidon sees how his father thinks of her, and although the king doesn’t do it consciously, he always put her on an impossibly high pedestal, and Sidon grew up believing that he HAD to meet that expectation, and that he would never, no matter how hard he tried.
When Link tames Vah Ruta and they both go to see the king, he tells his son:
“As your father, I am proud of you for fighting the Divine Beast alongside Link. You have grown much recently. I know you will be a worthy heir when your time comes.”
Then Sidon bows his head, as if he’s overcome with emotions because his dad tells him he’s proud of what he’s accomplished. King Dorephan isn’t a bad guy, don’t get me wrong, but the grief of losing his daughter (in this case, he thought she went missing and had been in the DB for 100 years, he didn’t know she died) made him sort of lose sight of Sidon’s achievements in those 100 years because he was so racked with worry and guilt. So although the king isn’t a bad father, he fails to reassure his son that he doesn’t need to do anything to make him proud (even though Sidon had definitely done stuff to make his dad proud over the years).
(Btw im pretty sure tripple digits in age is considered teens or early adulthood for Zora, so he’s still pretty young, I imagine around Link’s age if he were Hylian)
But that’s about all we get in botw.
So now we move on to totk. And oh boy do we get a load of Sidon angst. Some people might disagree with me but having read between the lines of what Lady Yona talked about (and just WHAT she actually said) in the first half of the water temple quest (before we find it, when we’re up in Mipha court), it really is angsty.
She’s aware of the fact that his sister’s death affected him a lot and still does despite knowing that her spirit moved on, and it (at this point) has started to affect their relationship.
Yona and Sidon have a disagreement before/after the battle with the Sludge Like, where they argue about him going with Link to this pillar of light that has suddenly appeared. It starts with Sidon saying: “Lady Yona! It is far too dangerous for you to be here” in reference to the sludge, but she has none of that.
She tells him that she wants him to go to the pillar with Link, and that: “For a long time, I have been concerned that you are holding yourself back and not acting as freely as I would have expected.” This has some credit because it’s mentioned somewhere how they were both childhood friends, and the Zora live long lives so it’s safe to assume their childhood is prolonged, which means that they’ve known each other for a very long time. Yona knows how he acts and behaves, his mannerisms and his fears, and that’s why she wants to push him to face them.
She tells him that if he goes with Link they’ll be able to overcome this problem, but he hesitates. She notices, asking him what is troubling him, and he hesitates again to speak what’s on his mind. This is when the Sludge Like comes in, and after the battle, the conversation continues.
Sidon hurries back to Yona and says: “Thank goodness. Lady Yona, if something had happened to you... I...” and there’s where it becomes clear just how terrified he is of losing her. He doesn’t finish the sentence, though, he changes the subject and tells her that she should go back to the domain in case more monsters show up. She tells him that he should focus on what Link said and that he can leave the court to them (Yona and the others that came with her). Sidon replies with: “W-well... Of course it would be best for me to accompany him. However, I cannot leave you alone in this dangerous place!” He’s ignoring what’s best and instead focusing on the safety of his betrothed, because of course he would! A monster just showed up and it took both Link and Sidon to take it down, imagine if neither of them were with her, what would happen? What would he do if she got hurt? And then the following dialogue happens (you dont need to read the whole thing, you can just skip to the bold parts):
Yona: “Did you not entrust this task to us already? We will not be on our own for long. We shall be just fine.”
Sidon: “But
”
Yona: “Sidon, my darling... I truly appreciate that you worry so for my safety. It speaks to the kindness in your heart.
But you are the prince of the Zora. One day, you will lead the people of your beloved domain.
I can see right through you, whether you want me to or not. You are yielding to the fear of losing someone you love again.
You must overcome your past and face whatever the future holds with courage.”
Sidon: “But... I...”
Yona: “Enough is enough! You are not acting like yourself! You must leave this place to me!
Sweet Sidon... Do not get lost in the past. You must keep moving ever onward. Just follow your heart, as you always do!”
Sidon: “Like my old self... Like I always do...”
Yona: “It is all right. I swear it. I am not going anywhere.”
Sidon: “I see... And there it is, clear as day... I was giving in to my fear of once more losing someone I love... I
 I

You are right, Yona! I will not give in to this fear! Nor forsake my trust in you! I leave this place to you, my love.”
[skip]
Yona: “All this time he was clinging to regret over being unable to save his precious sister, Mipha... My poor, tormented Sidon.
And to think he was unknowingly paralyzed from taking action because he feared losing me as well...
Yet he has overcome this trial and placed his faith in me. At last, the Sidon I know and love has come back to me.”
During this conversation, Sidon hesitates more than once and you can see it starting to irritate Yona because she knows the potential he doesn’t see in himself, because it’s not just fear of losing a loved one, but it’s his own insecurity from not being able to save Mipha.
He doesn’t care that he was very young and wouldn’t have been able to anyway, he just cares that he couldn’t. In his eyes, he failed to save his sister. And I’m not going to go too deep into this point but it’s clear that she was playing both older sister and mother, because we can assume their mother died a while back (she’s never mentioned and it’s just the two of them and their father even as far back as age of calamity if you want to include that).
What I’m saying is that with technically both the loss of his mother and his sister, it’s safe to assume that he feels some sort of responsibility for not being able to help, even if he was too young to do so, his disregard for the age he was at the time shows how much weight was left on his shoulders after Mipha died.
He never expected to be the heir to the throne, the sole survivor of his family (along with his dad), sure he’s a prince and princes have responsibility, but Mipha was always going to be in the spotlight (not that I’d imagine him jealous of this, it’s simply just a fact, and I think he might have actually even been comfortable with that), she was always going to be the Zora Champion and then Queen one day, so to have all of that suddenly dumped on him after the calamity as a literal kid would’ve undoubtedly had its effect on him.
Yona understands this, she tells Link, knowing he’s probably caught on, how he was “clinging to regret over being unable to save his precious sister, Mipha...”.
She has to reassure her love that she’s okay. “It is all right. I swear it. I am not going anywhere.”, she comforts him because she knows he needs it, he needs her to say it to him because that’s the only way he will believe she is in fact okay.
But his character develops. Sidon realises that in fearing for Yona, he has made her feel as if she isn’t trusted. He recognises the position he’s put them both in, him worrying relentlessly and stressing out about his loved ones because of his trauma, and her having to watch him fall down this never ending rabbit hole and being unable to do much about it because all he tries to do is shelter and protect her, even when it’s unnecessary.
But she does what she can anyway, and it pays off, because he comes back to reality and understands that although there will always be the risk of losing her, he knows that she is more than capable of taking care of herself. He knows of her strength, it was just hard for him to see the situation from her point of view. But she pushes him to do so, and he betters himself for her.
I think he’ll always have some small hint of this trauma response hidden away, but after this discussion, he’s got a firm hold on it, and is willing to control his fears for the love of his life so that they can start to build a life together without the sense of utter doom and despair over his past looming over them both.
I’m glad the writers did this, and didn’t just make them seem like this perfect couple with no issues, it shows a real and healthy relationship, and it shows that Sidon isn’t this perfect person and that he indeed has faults of his own.
That’s my take on it, anyway.
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