#fantastic dolly

[arcadegh0st]

Fantas(t)ic dolly OP💅🏽💘

[lovecraftian-lolita]

Does anyone have the max measurements to fantastic dolly? Both 2010 and 2020? Possibly? It’s like this dress exists and doesn’t exist.

[dollypopup]

(to be the one) to walk in the sun

Summary: What if Penelope said yes to Debling's proposal? What if Colin never cut into that dance? cowritten with @starryspindel Rating: E Snippet:

1816

Dear Mr. Bridgerton, I am writing to request your help in a important-

Dearest Colin, How are you? I hope you are well on your travels. I am

Colin, I have made a mistake

Mansfield Park was, in her humble opinion, the most boring piece of literature written in the last hundred years, which was a shame really because she usually liked all the novels penned By a Lady. She might have liked the novel the first, or second, or even fifth read through, but now onto her twenty-third (or was it thirty sixth? Sixty fourth? Forty first? One, two, three, four-) she was getting quite sick of Fanny, the insipid protagonist with the backbone of a chocolate éclair.

When was the last time she had an éclair? At the wedding breakfast? The engagement ball? How many had she eaten that day? One, two, three, four-

Her life had devolved into a series of numbers, something she had once thought would be so easy to keep track of. How far the room spread, (one, two, three, four-), toe to toe, (five and seventy slippers apart from wall to wall at the farthest, toe to heel, and six and thirty by the shorter end), the exact number of seams, immaculately maintained, from the papered walls, (one, two, three-), the slats of sunbeam through the curtains, (more in the midday than the morning) (one, two-). Once she began occupying herself with how many instances of the letter ‘a’ she could find ruffling through the book, (one- one- one- one-), she felt something within her splinter. 

But, as with everything in her life, now, there was nowhere for it to be kept but inside. 

So, she read. All but howled in her head as she huffed. Leave, Fanny. You could simply leave.

Fiction had, after all, been such a means of escape for her in the past. 

[eggisoup]

[felixcosm]

Watching The Best Little Whorehouse, I was hoping for a happy ending, until I looked it up halfway through and saw it was based on a true story ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[indecisive-dizzy]

Also another little Eddie idea

He based his drag/crossdressing persona off Jolene by Dolly Parton

His drag character is literally named Jolene for that reason alone

I think he’d be a fan of hers, she’s lovely

Oh Eddie would Love Dolly Parton! She is a dream! And Jolene is such a good song too I would base a drag persona off it.

I usually thought Eddie to have a very glam drag look! But not too heavy, ya know? less extravagant makeup in favor of ✨sparkly dresses✨

but also I envision another look with all out country/cowgirl aesthetic but turned up to 100 with glitter. Maybe that's the Jolene Look hehe!!

[keeksandgigz]

DOLLY IM GONNA NEED YOU TO PAY FOR MY THERAPIST BILLS BECAUSE THAT WAS SUCH A ROLLERCOASTER

the despair in r's dialogue was so palpable i like actually was near tearing up, it reminded me of that scene in spiderman no way home where aunt may dies- god it fucked me up

i just loved how intimate it felt, while still being a certain degree of spicy, especially the glass part, god I love similes like these it actually makes me weak in the knees

(i'll bill you my therapist's receipt)

It was just a dream

(Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader)

Summary: So this is based on This request that @taintedcigs got and she gave me permission to write it because it’s kind of heavy. The request is based on reader dreaming about crying at Eddie’s grave but I did change it to you having a dream about the day he almost died. That’s just the way it came to me personally. You have a dream about the day Eddie dies, but you wake him in his arms, and he comforts you in every way possible. WK: 3k.

Warnings: In beginning of the fic although it is a dream I do describe Eddie’s death so read with caution if that upsets you, unprotected p in v, love making, fingering, hurt/comfort, Eddie being the sweetest goofball, fluff. 18+MNDI!!

A/N: I’ve never written a single thing where I acknowledge “the scene” or Eddie dying, ever. Like I always write AU with no upside down. But after seeing those photos yesterday I’ve been feeling very emotional and I saw this request and idk it just kinda came to me. I did cry writing it, but it also comforted me a lot. But pls pls read with caution if this might be upsetting for you. Thank you to my lovely @babygorewhore & @bimbobaggins69 for beta reading for me. Sending everybody love.🖤

The muscles in your legs are screaming and your lungs burn with each step you take. The grey particle filled air feels like it’s filling your organs with each intake of breath. But it’s nothing compared to the tearing feeling in your heart, the anxiety and fear coursing through you pushing your aching body to keep running. The massive bite shaped gash in your calf is a distant sensation as your eyes zero in on the swarm of bats, eagerly searching for any signs of him.

“God fucking damn it, Eddie. Fuck!”

Tears stream down your cheeks and your throat is raw from the curses and screams you’ve been letting out for the last few minutes. At least you think it’s been minutes. It truly felt like it’s been hours since you watched him cut that rope. You screamed so loud you felt like your ear drums were going to burst. You scrambled back through the gate, injured leg be damned.

The minute you hit the ground, you didn’t stop. Not when you heard something in your shoulder crack, not when you heard Dustin screaming after you. You didn’t stop when one of those bats flew directly at you, you just ran faster, jabbing your spear directly into its heart as you went. And you weren’t going to stop. Not until you reached Eddie. You couldn’t. They’d have to kill you first.

The adrenaline in your body continued to push you forward, only a few feet away from the swarm now. You tried your best to focus your eyes through the endless streams of tears falling from them, and it took a few seconds but you finally saw him. Your heart lurched when you saw he was still standing, his shield held above him. It somehow gave you the strength to run faster, your spear slashing through the air at the bats to get to him.

“EDDIE!!!!!!!!!”

His head whips in your direction at the sound of your voice, a shocked look on his face. In the same moment he looks away a bat lunges at his side, taking a large bite out of him, causing him to cry out in pain.

“EDDIE NO!!”

You shove your spear into the bat that’s latched onto him and it lets out a shriek as it dies. Your relief is short lived because there’s a sudden stabbing pain in your already stinging shoulder and another one in your bicep.

“BABY!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING! FUCK!”

Eddie can’t believe you’re here, you weren’t supposed to follow him. He knew he wasn’t making it out of this, and now he was going to take you with him. He never should’ve cut that rope. He slams his spear against the bat on your shoulder, while you shove your nails into the one on your bicep. But it’s no use, you’re surrounded. Every time you get one off, two more are on you, and he’s starting to feel weak.

In that moment he does the only thing he can think to do, he wraps his arms around you, tackling you to the ground. His covers his body with yours, his arms on each side of your head, his face hovering above yours so your eyes can meet.

“I’m so sorry baby, I’m so sorry. I’m sorry.” Tears fall from his eyes and onto your cheeks, pooling together with the ones leaving your own eyes.

“It’s okay, it’s okay.” You soothe him, your bloodied hands reaching up to cradle his face. His eyes are shut now, his body tensing over and over as he uses it to shield yours against the bats attacks. “At least we are together, yeah? Kiss me.”

He obligees, his dirty sweat stained lips meeting yours in a desperate kiss. He kisses you over and over until he physically can’t anymore. His head lulling to the side against your chest. You hold onto him for dear life, barely even feeling the chunks you’re sure are being taken out of your forearms. You feel like it’s never going to end, until suddenly it does. The attacks all stop at once, a chorus of thuds sounding around you. Then you hear Dustin’s voice calling your names, it’s distant, but it’s there.

“Eddie, Eddie, they’re dead.” You shake him slightly and he groans. “You gotta get off me so I can take a look at you baby.”

“Oh my god!! Are you guys okay!?” You see Dustin’s panicked face standing over you and you wish you had it in you to make a sarcastic remark about how you’re obviously not, but you don’t.

“Dustin! Help me, help me roll him over, please.” You practically beg him, your sobs still haven’t stopped, the shallowness of Eddie’s breath taking away any relief you felt about the bats being gone.

Dustin bends down, rolling Eddie off you as carefully as he can. Eddie whimpers when his back hits the ground and you immediately shoot up right, leaning over him.

“Eddie, sweetie, can you look at me?”

“Bad, huh?” He groans, a slight smirk still somehow present on his face.

“No no, Eddie you’re gonna be okay.” Dustin is on his knees how, trying to access Eddie’s injuries through his panic.

“I didn’t run away this time, right?” Your heart breaks at the sound of his voice, this can’t be fucking happening.

“No, baby, you didn’t. But we’re gonna get you okay of here, okay?” You grab rub your thumbs over his temples, resting your forehead against his.

“Yeah, we just gotta get you to a hospital, come on, you guys gotta get up.” Dustin begs, tears fall from his eyes and it breaks your heart even more. You hate that he has to see this.

“I just… I need a second.” Eddie groans, his hand weakly reaches for your face, cupping it like he’s done a thousand times before, like you’re scared he will never do again. “I love you, I love you so much baby. You’re my everything, I’m so sorry.”

“I love you Eddie, I love you. It’s gonna be okay don’t apologize because it’s gonna be okay.” You rub your nose against his, he feels cold and his breathing is more shallow than ever.

“Dustin…” he turns to his young friend with a found smile. “You’re gonna have to look after those little sheep for me, okay?”

“No, no, you’re gonna do it yourself” Dustin’s sobs cause a new wave of your own to wrack through your body, shaking every bone.

“Nah man… you’re gonna do it for me…” Eddie smiles, patting Dustin’s cheek with all his strength. “Baby girl… you’re gonna be okay, okay? I’m … so sorry. I love you.”

His hands start to slip from both of your faces, his eyes falling shut.

“Eddie? Eddie!! No, no, no, no. Baby stay with me.” You shake his face, but this time you get no response. Your hands clutch onto his hair, your head falling to his chest. “NO!!! NO! NO NO NO NO!!! THIS CAN’T BE HAPPENING!!! EDDIE NO!!!”

You feel like the world is shaking around you, you feel like your heart is being ripped from your chest. You can’t lose him. You feel warm hands on your shoulders shaking you as someone says your name over and over again. You push them off. You aren’t leaving him. They’ll have to leave you here.

“Baby!!!! Wake up!!!! You’re dreaming, it’s a dream, I’m here.” Eddie’s voice finally gets through to you, and your dream hazed mind vaguely starts to recognize the feeling of his arms around you. You come back into your waking body slowly and then all at once, shooting straight up with a shriek.

You look around the room panting, it’s still dark, and you’re in bed. With Eddie. Eddie is alive. He didn’t die. The others got to you in time. You’re in your new fancier than you ever imagined, government tip off home. That you share with Eddie and Wayne. Eddie is alive. You start to repeat the mantra that’s become all to familiar to yourself in your mind as you feel strong arms wrap around you from behind.

“It’s okay baby, you’re okay, I’m here. It’s just a dream.” Eddie soothes you, pulling you into his lap so he can cradle you. He rocks back and forth, his hands running over every part of you, he makes sure to keep his grip strong, remembering that you said it makes you feel grounded. It makes you feel like he’s really here.

“Oh Eddie, it was so real. It was like I was really there again.” You sob into his bare chest as your hands desperately caress his skin. Some of it still has the same smooth texture you always remembered, most of it is rough from scars. But it’s just another thing that grounds you to reality, another reminder that he’s real and the dream wasn’t.

“I know sweetheart, I know. But it’s okay, I’m here, I’m always going to be here for you. I’m so sorry.” Eddie’s crying now, the guilt of leaving you, of putting you through this plagues him constantly. The dreams aren’t every night like they used to be, they’ve finally started to space out after almost a year. But it still pains him deeply that he put you through this. That on nights like this you scream out for him, because of him.

“It’s okay Eddie, it’s okay.” Your hands loop around his neck, pulling him close. You hate that he beats himself up, you understand why he did it and you’re just glad he’s alive, glad he’s here with you. But your unconscious mind couldn’t seem to get the memo. No matter how much you understood, no matter how much mental and physical healing you did in the waking hours, the dream always found its way back to you. “I love you. So much. I love you so much Eddie.”

“I love you baby, more than anything.” He wanted to apologize again, until his lungs gave out, but he knows you hate it when he does that. That you’ll just tell him there’s nothing to be sorry for, even though he will always feel like there is. So he does what he always does, he decides to show you how sorry he is without his words. To remind you how here he truly is.

He cups your face in his hands gently, like you’re porcine glass that could break at any moment. He rests his forehead against yours, just reveling in the feeling of being close to you. He takes deep breaths and you follow, you’re basically breathing each other's air but you don’t even care, you want it that way. He kisses you sweetly, once, twice, three times. The fourth kiss is more firm, but still so gentle. Your fingers lace through his hair as you shift your body so you're straddling him. His tongue softly licks across your bottom lip and you immediately grant him access, tangling it with your own.

He kisses you leisurely, his tongue exploring every inch of your mouth as his hands roam your body. Your thin tank top is the only thing separating your skin from his but it feels like the thickest winter coat right now so you break the kiss to quickly pull it over your head. You press your chest against his, his skin against yours feels like a breath of fresh air and you sigh at the feeling.

“My beautiful girl, you’re so beautiful, I don’t know what I’d do without you.” His brown eyes are soft and filled with love as they look into yours. He gives you a gentle kiss before his lips start to travel down your jaw and neck. Gentle caresses of his lips and flicks of his tongue pull breathy gasps and needy moans from you. “Let me show you how much I love you.”

“Yes Eddie, please.” It’s all you need right now, you need him as close to you as possible in every way. You need him.

“Lay back for me baby.”

You oblige, rolling off him and onto your back. You situate your head on the pillows and he climbs over you with a sweet smile on his face.

“Look at you, you think I’d ever leave someone as sexy as you? Not a chance baby.” He leans down and kisses you, his ringed hand caresses your inner thigh and you shiver. He brings it to your core, running his knuckles along your underwear covered slit. “I don’t think I could go a day without you.”

“You went like… almost two months without me when we were healing.”

“Shhh… that’s besides the point, that was like forced, doctor ordered, celibacy and it was almost more torture than the healing process. Don’t remind me of the dark times, babe.” You giggle at him, your heart warming at him just being Eddie. He stayed that way, laughing and joking, making D&D references through it all.

“You’re so dramatic. But, you’re not wrong. I missed you so bad when I couldn’t have you.”

“You can have me now babe, all the time, forever, whenever you want. I’m not going anywhere.” He smirks at you as he pulls your panties down your legs, you kick them off your ankles and spread your legs for him. He groans at the sight of your slick pussy, bringing two long fingers and running them through your lips. You moan and your back arches off the bed when he inserts them inside you, immediately curving them to hit that perfect spot.

“Fuck.” His fingers thrust in and out of you at the perfect pace, his thumb comes up to circle your clit and he leans down to place gentle wet kisses along your throat. “Oh god.”

“Yeah baby? Is that good? You gonna cum for me?” His fingers speed up and he gently nips at that spot on your neck that makes you crazy, his cock ruts against your thigh and it sends you over the edge. Your body tensing underneath him as moans rip out of you. “That’s it, good girl.”

He fucks you through your high, only pulling his fingers from you when he feels your body relax. He holds eye contact with you as he inserts the digits into his mouth, sucking your juices off them with a groan.

“Eddie… I need to feel you, please.” You reach for the band of his sweatpants, tugging at the material.

“No need to beg sweets, I’ve got you, I’m gonna take care of you.” He pushes his pants off, freeing his cock and taking it into his hand, stroking it a few times. He runs the tip through your slick folds, bringing it up to circle your clit before slowly pushing inside you. Once his hips are flush against yours he connects your lips again, kissing you passionately.

“Oh fuck, Eddie. Yes.” He starts to roll his hips, not pulling out of you, just reveling in the feeling of being inside you. You clutch onto his back, pulling him down fully on top of you, just wanting to feel his weight on you.

“Mmm you feel so good, so so good, pussy is always so good for me.” He’s kissing every inch of you he can reach, your cheeks, eyelids, neck, collar bones. He finally pulls his hips back, slowly pulling his cock almost all the way out of you before shoving it deep inside you again. He repeats this action a few times before thrusting into you deep and hard. He still has his weight on you, and he’s not fucking you fast, just taking his time feeling every single part of you. With his hands, his cock, his lips,

“Eddie, I love you, I love you, you feel so good.”

“I love you so much baby girl, more than anything, I love fucking you.” He picks up the pace a little, his hand snakes between your bodies so he can rub your clit.

“Oh fuuuuck, yes, Eddie I’m - I’m gonna cum soon.”

“Yeah, cum for me, I wanna see your beautiful face when you cum undone on my cock.”

His lips crash against yours, his tongue immediately licking into your mouth, he’s hitting that perfect spot over and over again and his fingers continue to circle your clit. It’s all so good, and it sends you over the edge. Your orgasm crashes over you, you let out needy moans and gasps against Eddie’s mouth as your pussy clenches around him. He pulls away so he can see your face, and the sight has him spilling inside of you. He falls forward, his face buried in your neck. He places gentle kisses there in between panting breaths.

The position reminds you of the dream, the memory really, but this time it doesn’t sting, because Eddie is alive. He’s alive and he’s panting on top of you for the best reason, instead of the worst.

“Thank you.” You sigh, wrapping your arms around him, squeezing him tight. “I’m sorry for waking you up.”

“Psh! Don’t be sorry, I got to be here for my girl and I got to have bomb sex? Seems like a win win to me.” You feel him smile against your neck and it makes you laugh.

He rolls off of you onto his back, and you have to push the thoughts of that day from your mind again but you don’t have long to think about it because he’s pulling you into his chest, running his hands down your back and placing a kiss on the top of your head before your mind can fully go there.

“But in all seriousness, don’t be sorry, okay? You know I’m always here for you. No matter what. Especially on nights like this. I’m all in, always. I fucking love you so much. I’m not going anywhere.” He puts his fingers under your chin, tilting your face up to look at him. He smiles at you sweetly, placing a kiss on your nose, then your lips.

“I love you Eddie. I’m always here for you too. I’m never letting you go. Ever.”

You nuzzle into his chest, just happy to feel him. Just happy he’s alive. You might both be scarred, mentally and physically, and they might not ever fully heal. But at least you’ll always have each other.

[luvindrr]

Sirius says house chores are a group activity

poly!marauders x fem!reader | fluff | 349 words c/w: allusion to sex

James watches in stupefied wonder as Sirius Black steps behind you with a squeeze to your waist. That’s not the wondrous part; Sirius is always grabbing your waist. The wondrous part is that he’s not camping out in the basement while the rest of you are cleaning, hoping James doesn’t drag him out by the feet to scrub the toilet.

“Can I help you with that, gorgeous?” He’s using his smooth voice- the silky, low one he deploys when he wants to get in your trousers. Thankfully, you don’t entertain him. “That’d be fantastic, Sirius. You can start with these.” You point to something in the sink- presumably a stack of dishes- and James watches, dumbfounded, as Sirius only rinses off the suds and places them on the rack dutifully.

And he’s not even wearing gloves.

“What’cha doin’ there, lovie?” It’s Remus that breaks him out of his trance, snaking an arm around his waist. “Look!” James whisper-shouts in your direction. “Pads is doing house chores!”

“And he’s not even wearing gloves!”

“I can hear you two!” Sirius throws his head with a huff, hair following with the same indignant attitude. “Honestly, you make it sound like I never do anything around here.”

“Because you don’t!”

He's offended at that one. Water sprays as he twirls to point an accusatory finger. “I absolutely do too, you lying twat.”

“Oh forgive my incompetence; how could I forget you’re the king of lifting your legs when I come by with the vacuum cleaner-”

“You never bother to wipe the bathroom mirror-”

“YOU LEAVE YOUR LONG CURLY SPIDERLINGS-” James mimics mingling legs with his fingers “-JUMPING AROUND ON THE SHOWER DOOR-”

“Y-”

He’s cut off by a mocking, high pitched screech. “HOUSE CHORES ARE FOR HOUSE ELVES; IT’S IN THE NAME-”

“Sirius, please; you’re dripping on the floor.”

“Oh, sorry dolly.” He turns back around, completely abandoning James’ yapping. A kiss to your temple before pulling another dish from your hands. “I’ll take that, thank you.”

James gapes, bewildered. “She’s completely bewitched him, that woman.”

Remus laughs. “She’s completely bewitched me too.”

masterlist

[curiosweet]

I want to look into the Sweet Home tag, but I am showcasing SO much restraint. I have a few episodes left of the season and I would like to take my time with it.

[mostlyihyperfixate]

I love you "secretly mean to everyone" Phoenix

I love you "team dad sunshine in a bottle" Phoenix

I love you pan Miles

I love you ace/demi/gray Miles

I love you gay Phoenix

I love you bi Phoenix

I love you sexually experienced Miles

I love you touch starved Miles

I love you "head over heels for Dollie and wanting to try it out officially with Iris" Phoenix

I love you "I was just trying out being with a girl when I dated Dollie and it didn't work out" Phoenix

I love you "I'm still experiencing trauma from my childhood and my father's death twenty years later" Miles

I love you "the past is the past and I've got therapy and I'm happy" Miles

I love you "Dollie severely traumatized me" Phoenix

I love you "Dollie was just a bad ex and I'm fine" Phoenix

I love you "we've been dating since the first game" Wrightworth

I love you "it's post-Spirts of Justice and we still haven't got together" Wrightworth

I love you "I sent letters to Miles from the moment he left for Germany" Phoenix

I love you "I had no idea where Miles was and couldn't send him letters while he was in Germany" Phoenix

I love you "actually living with von Karma wasn't so bad he mostly took good care of me" Miles

I love you "von Karma was some flavor and some degree of abusive" Miles

I love you "I knew Miles wasn't dead and I was just pissed that he left so abruptly" Phoenix

I love you "I thought that suicide note was real and I'm pissed you fooled me into thinking you were dead" Phoenix

I love you "My note was obviously just about going to find myself and I'm not sorry" Miles

I love you "My note was serious but something changed my mind" Miles

I love you "I was aware I've loved you since I was nine" Phoenix

I love you "I just am now figuring out that maybe going to law school to save a guy I knew for half a year wasn't platonic and I'm in my thirties" Phoenix

There are so many absolutely fantastic variables to tell this story with and I love them all.

I love you, Ace Attorney fandom, for providing me with so many lovely stories with which to wile away my time, probably more than I should be wiling it away.

[cas-backwards-tie]

I definitely think you should turn it into a series if you’re passionate about it! 😁🥰🙌🏻 absolutely LOVEEEE this! It’s so good- all the details- the thought, characterization. Literally it’s perfect 🥰 like I said, I was thinking about this the other day again and 🥵👏🏻🔥 it’s just… amazing.

DO YOURSELF A FAVOR AND READ

Desperate Times Call For Different Measures

Prompt: "Himbo Nepo baby Ben Solo becomes cut off from the family money so he makes extra cash by coming an OnlyFans content maker who takes pictures of his cock next to stuff like footling subs and Lysol cans"

*Credit to @Ate_Lala_ on Twitter for the prompt

Warnings: vulgar language, descriptions of dick, swearing, brief description of masturbation (m)

Honestly it had started off as a joke. Actually, not even a joke. More like an act out of desperation. Once his dad had cut him off—literally, he cut his credit cards right in front of him, all 8 of them—Ben knew he needed money, and fast. He was accustomed to a certain lifestyle. How was he supposed to live without supporting girls through college by showering them in hundred dollar bills while they shook their plastic tits in front of his face, or missing out on fucking the new towel girl six ways from Sunday in the private tent at the country club?

God forbid he could no longer rail the models of the stupid fashion show his family was required to attend and try to see his cum leaking out and down the model’s legs as she walked down the runway, face flushed and thighs still shaking from being wrapped around Ben’s waist. The designers clothes honestly looked better with his cum staining it anyways.

No money meant no more car shopping, meant no more buying Rolexes, and no more Gucci. He had to deal with wearing last season’s line, and that was an embarrassment. The saving grace was that he had 20 days left on his membership of his last OnlyFans subscription. It was while he was cumming inside his custom made fleshlight to a girl dressed like some slutty anime character making herself cum with a tentacle shaped dildo that it hit him; He could make an OnlyFans.

Ben Solo had the body of marble carved by the gods and he knew it, but he also knew there was one part of him in specific that was godly as well. It was already difficult enough finding clothes that fit his Sasquatch body, but finding underwear that didn’t end up with a hole in the crotch from the fabric being stretched out by his megacock was in and of itself an impossible mission. Half of the time he just went commando.

It would have to be under a fake name. But what would he post? He didn’t need his face out there and deal with his dad cursing him out about disgracing the family and end up disowning him. And chicks weren’t fans of being filmed and uploaded. People only care about dicks either way, that was the main thing but jacking off seemed lacking in pizazz. He liked to show off. He liked to know that he could get girls on all fours at the snap of his fingers and he most definitely liked to show that he was better than any of the guys out there in the world. And what best way to do that than to emasculate them?

That whole thing about the chick with the big fuck-me-eyes from 'That 70’s Show' comparing her husband’s own schlong between a beer can or a carrot stick popped into his mind. And that was his first post. His limp dick in the middle of a carrot stick and a can of Modelo all lined up on the black countertop of his bathroom sink with the caption ‘Guess I beat Ashton Kutcher.’ Post to Twitter. Cha-Ching. The next day when he had checked his profile, girls had flooded his subscriber count faster than he racked up credit card bills.

‘I squirted just by looking at it 💦’

‘That thing could split me in half and I wouldn’t complain 🥵’

‘Give me that hard cock 🥵🤤🍆💦’

They thought he was hard? Well this had to be remedied, he didn’t need them thinking this was as big as he could get. He looked around his room for the closest thing he could use as a comparison which was his Fiji water bottle and rushed to the bathroom, not even hesitating to yank his sweatpants down and start tugging on himself. His mind rifled through the mental spank bank Rolodex until he landed on the memory of freshman year in college when he had a 3rd year sorority girl blowing him outside the building where he was supposed to be taking his midterm. Oh, the sinful noises her throat made….

He had to stop before he came. This was a noticeable difference in comparison to his first post; this time the veins were more prominent, his foreskin was pulled back to reveal his swollen red tip that was oozing precum tears on the sleek counter material, and the 3 birth freckles that were scattered along his shaft just like he had on the rest of his body.

‘Oh you guys thought I was hard before?’ Post. Mega Cha-Ching. If the comments weren’t flooding his mailbox before, they were a sea of messages now. From then on, his fanbase grew and so did the numbers in his newly opened bank account. Ben took great pride in his photos, always making sure the angle captured the size of it versus the competiton object he had next to it. The photos were always of high quality though he supposes he owes that to his phone’s camera. The latest model he got sent for Christmas it wasn’t even out on the market yet. Mouthwash bottle, Lysol air freshener cans, footlong subs, a fucking Pelligrino bottle, you name it. None of them even stood a remote chance against Ben Solo’s cock.

On the picture comparing his cock to his size 13 Gucci loafers, a person had commented on the post 'It’s fake, it’s some kind of silicone prop.' Oh Ben’s ego didn’t like that. You could say a lot of things about him, but saying his massive horse cock was a lie? Think again, bud.

That was the caption of his next post—a video, his first video—where he had recorded the end of an intense masturbation session. If his cock wasn’t already proven to be inhumanly large, his baseball mitt sized hand just added fuel to the fire the way it stroked his engorged organ like it was a life or death necessity. The video was 30 seconds; 12 seconds of his foreskin slapping and his stuttered breathy moans before the rest of the clip showed him shooting his load big enough to fill the flask he used to sneak in to private school dances, groans and growls being exhaled through his teeth as he painted the black countertop. “Still think it’s fake, fuckhead?” He pants.

~~~~~

Author's note: If you guys think I should turn this into a series, lemme know! This could count as a sort of prologue or a quick little introduction to the story. 💜

[honeytonedhottie]

honey's guide to winter⋆.ೃ࿔*:･❄️💕

winter is my SEASON. as a december baby and a certified winter princess im qualified to talk about to have the most princessy, sugary winter that you've ever had and were gonna explore just that in this post…💬🎀

WINTER BEAUTY ;

when i think of winter beauty i think of glittery, shimmery eyelids and frosty pink lips. glittery nails, long dolly lashes, and LOTS and lots of ribbons and furry accessories. winter beauty is about looking fabulously flushed from the cold, looking and feeling like a glittery winter fairy ᡣ𐭩 •｡ꪆৎ ˚⋅💕

lets start off with the makeup. first and foremost wash ur face and prep ur skin cuz it makes ur makeup look 10x better…💬🎀

♡ prime and prep ur skin ♡ put on ur foundation

when putting on foundation it helps to apply the product onto the top of ur hand and apply with a brush for more coverage 💓🍨

♡ next, use some concealer as needed ♡ fill in ur brows

♡ now feel free to prep ur eye lids if u have some redness, but we're gonna go in with an icy eyeshadow. for this look lets do a light blueish grey tone and just put that all over our eyelid

♡ put a darker blue color on the outer corner of ur eyes, and very gently blend outwards towards ur brows as u see in the first photo above. then go in with an angelic light blue on the inner area of ur eyelid (not the inner corner) ♡ use a bit of eyeliner to make ur eyes stand-out

this makeup look is focused highly on the EYES and the lips so feel free to do ur face as u normally would, contouring, blush etc ❄️🍧

♡ go in with some GLITTERY eyeshadow to make ur eyes shine and you can NEVER have enough shimmer ♡ next put on some half lashes because they rly pull this look together and dont forget to apply mascara onto ur lower lashes to make ur eyes look fuller ♡ a little highlight under ur brows for that blingy 2000's look

now lets talk about how to do the PERFECT FROSTY LIP. u wanna start by outlining ur lips with a lip liner that is on the rosier side. nyx has a lot of good ones like that. go in with a baby pinkish or a light pink lipstick (i say both these things cuz you'll know what looks good on u) and finish off with a shimmery lipgloss

furthermore we need a yummy winter scent! invest in some yummy scents like…💬🎀

♡ soft, powdery scents

♡ warm cashmeres and cake scents

♡ the bath and body works snowflakes and cashmere scent specifically is so nostalgic to me

♡ frosty petal and berry scents

we should also be prepared to protect our gorgeous doll skin from the harsh winter weather so make sure that ur doing ur skincare accordingly! look for creamy, hydrating formulas and make sure to cleanse gently in little circles ᡣ𐭩 •｡ꪆৎ ˚⋅ after you've cleansed, use a nice rich serum to keep ur skin plump and hydrated and NOT dry.

another thing, chapped lips are a NO this winter so make sure that ur walking around with ur yummy chapstick to protect ur lips from the cold and keep them pillowy soft…💬🎀

♡ creamy lipglosses

♡ whipped soaps and body butters

WINTER ESSENTIALS ;

during the winter time, use a lotion that is on the thicker side because we should be moisturized all year round but ESPECIALLY in the winter. because its so cold, lean towards lotions that are thicker and creamier. also look out for lotions that have oils, or glycerin/sodium lactate (these are all humectants and they're FANTASTIC for hydrating ur skin).

♡ thick lotions, creams and body butters

♡ a christmas wishlist written in a pink glitter gel pen OR a fluffy pink pen

♡ chapstick and LOTS of shimmery lipgloss

♡ herbal teas and supplements

during the winter time, there we're exposed to reduced sunlight, and seasonal illnesses. and that not hot!! so make sure that ur taking supplements like vitamin D (cuz during the winter time, we tend to spend more time indoors and have less exposure to sunlight, which is crucial for vitamin D synthesis) ᡣ𐭩 •｡ꪆৎ ˚⋅ along with other things like zinc, elderberry, and other probiotics.

DISCLAIMER : its crucial for u to do ur own research when it comes to ur health so make sure that u do that before applying anything that u learn on the internet for ur own safety!…💬🎀

some teas that i recommend in the winter time is ginger tea, peppermint tea and lemon balm tea. i also rly love rosehip tea cuz it is SUCH a treat 💕

♡ hot chocolate with pink marshmallows and whipped cream

♡ a bouncy blowout

♡ big fluffy lashes

WINTER FASHION ;

winter is literally THEE season for over the top accessories like earmuffs and mittens. invest in some super cute fluffy earmuffs and gloves, fluffy boots and puffy coats with fur trimmed that are cinched at the waist to look like an adorable winter doll! mini skirts, tights and leg warmer combo is also very doll for the winter.

this winter we're giving the baby pink and white color scheme, with long silky hair, icy pink lips, victoria's secret pink perfumes and BODY GLITTER…💬🎀

on the winter wardrobe shopping list/checklist we have thick tights and stockings, thick comfy pajamas, a couple or more cute pairs of boots, a winter coat etc.

ribbons

legwarmers

thick tights

thick stockings

comfy pjs

boots

adorable winter coat

fur coat

some more things that are rly winter-esque in fashion are those fur coats. they're SO luxurious and so pretty + they keep u warm so they're an absolute STAPLE when it comes to winter fashion. look for things that are FUZZY cuz they rly radiate those amazing winter vibes.

WINTER MOOD BOARDS ;

PREPPING FOR WINTER ;

♡ buy some new body scrubs. because its so cold and we're usually covering up more during the winter months, its the perfect opportunity to work on and perfect ur body care routine so dont neglect that

♡ buy a nice fuzzy blanket or one of those heated blankets cuz shit gets cold, and we wanna stay as warm and toasty as possible 💕

[babydollmarauders]

TWIN HUGHES — LUKE HUGHES

part of the luke’s gf au !

dolly.notparton

liked by lhughes_06, jackhughes, and 56,827 others

dolly.notparton life the past 9 months…. thank you for sharing your birthday @/jackhughes 🤍 pretty sweet of you

Comments on this post are limited

jackhughes not like i had a choice, the twins were coming out whether i wanted to share a birthday or not

dolly.notparton i spent the last 9 months of my life making your presents, you could at least act thankful!

jackhughes do they come with a receipt?

dolly.notparton THATS YOUR NIECE AND NEPHEW YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT, YOU UNGRATEFUL SWINE!

jackhughes wtf is a swine?

dolly.notparton god you should’ve gone to college

dylanduke25 TWIN! WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN!

dolly.notparton oh my god, they can say that and MEAN IT! DYLAN YOURE A GENIUS!

edwards.73 i don’t think anyone has ever said that about duker and meant it

dolly.notparton @/edwards.73 be nice to my dyl pickle

edwards.73 i’d be a lot nicer if you didn’t give me ammo by calling him things like “dyl pickle”

lhughes_06 so grateful for this little family we’ve created ❤️

dolly.notparton i l*ve you <3

lhughes_06 did you just censor the word “love”?

dolly.notparton maybe you would get the uncensored version if you hadn’t left your extremely pregnant girlfriend for hockey? idk, just a thought

jackhughes get him dolly!

lhughes_06 @/jackhughes stay out of this

_quinnhughes dolly and her dolls 🩷💙 i’m so happy for you guys. i know you’ll make amazing parents

dolly.notparton quinny, i love you tremendously. hurry up and finish in the playoffs so you can meet your niece and nephew 🤍

_quinnhughes i love you too but i’m not “hurrying” anything, i’ve got the cup in mind

dolly.notparton so you hate me and my children

_quinnhughes that’s not at all what i just said

dolly.notparton i can guarantee that’s exactly what you just said

lhughes_06 please don’t fight her on this, she’s tired and just pushed out two babies and i know she’ll find a way to be angry at me about this too

_quinnhughes @/lhughes_06 so i should fight her on this? heard. @/dolly.notparton check your texts

elblue6 my babies and my grandbabies 💗

dolly.notparton love you mama el!! can’t wait for you to come see the twins!

curtislazar95 god help us, they’re multiplying

dolly.notparton maybe i’ll make a whole hockey team of them

curtislazar95 20 sarcastic poodle haired bambi skaters with insatiable appetites

john.marino97 congratulations, guys! i’m happy to hear it was a happy and healthy birth story

dolly.notparton they’ll love their uncle johnny because he’s a twin just like them 🤍

john.marino97 i can teach them all about being a twin

lhughes_06

liked by njdevils, nhl, and 64,291 others

lhughes_06 Milo Oliver Hughes; May 14th 2024, 3:16pm

Luella Grace Hughes; May 14th 2024, 3:20pm

tagged dolly.notparton

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dolly.notparton we made those

lhughes_06 fuck yeah we did! we did fantastic!

dolly.notparton and jack tries to say i can’t cook!

jackhughes because you can’t. you burned water. HOW DO YOU BURN WATER?

dolly.notparton @/jackhughes do you see what i cooked up inside of me?! you cried when you saw them!

jackhughes that was between us!

dolly.notparton @/jackhughes and now it’s between us and luke’s 185k followers and probably all of twitter! 🫶

user72 ARE YOU TELLING ME SHE’S BEEN PREGNANT FOR NINE MONTHS AND NONE OF US NOTICED?!

user93 OH MY GOD! LUKE’S A DILF

liked by dolly.notparton

markestapa SHOW ME THE BABIES!

lhughes_06 if you’d check the groupchat for once, you’d see the babies

markestapa oh

markestapa OH THEY’RE SO CUTE! YOU GUYS DID GOOD

lhughes_06 thanks stop sign! 🛑

edwards.73 congrats guys 🤝

lhughes_06 thanks eds 🤝

dolly.notparton this is a birth announcement not a damn frat party photo dump, you guys could add some hearts or at least a damn smiley face!

edwards.73 @/dolly.notparton no 🤝

dawson1417 congratulations! can’t wait to meet them next season!

njdevils gift basket coming your way! 👀congratulations!

user20 TWINS 🥹🫶

rutgermcgroarty swimmers be swimming

lhughes_06 🏊‍♂️🏊‍♂️

dolly.notparton do guys think or do they just do?

user85 so not only is luke the youngest hughes brother, but he’s also the only one in a long-term relationship and the first one to have kids… jack and quinn better step it up

user03 they kept this a secret for nine months and then really just pulled a “SURPRISE!” on us?! he played hockey all the way up until the birth— they dropped NO hints

nhl congratulations luke and y/n!

_quinnhughes proud of you two and how much you’ve grown ❤️ not little kids chasing each other around with bugs and porcelain dolls anymore, are ya?

lhughes_06 nope, all grown up. in the league with 2 kids now! thanks bro

dolly.notparton not my fault he was scared of my dolls! have i mentioned that he made me get rid of them when i moved in?

_quinnhughes @/dolly.notparton once or twice a day, yeah

dolly.notparton those were my babies 💔

lhughes_06 @/dolly.notparton i just gave you 2 new babies… the real kind

dolly.notparton luke, you genius! i can get luella porcelain dolls!

lhughes_06 @/dolly.notparton NO! THATS NOT WHAT I MEANT!

_quinnhughes @/dolly.notparton look in the attic when you get home 😉

lhughes_06 THOSE DEMON THINGS HAVE BEEN UP THERE THE WHOLE TIME?!

[omgthatdress]

In December 1927, Norwegian-born twins Paal and Lief Roschberg started their career with a bang by impersonating the newly-retired Dolly Sisters at Les Ailes de Paris.

They then arranged to dance with Josephine Baker, until the other legendary Paris cabaret performer Mistinguette swooped in and took them under her wing. It was a very Taylor Swift-Katy Perry situation.

Later, Mistinguette would say of them, "They were so ravishing that each night after the show they would allow themselves to be kidnapped by beauty enthusiasts of both sexes."

The Rocky Twins became known more for their stunning androgynous beauty rather than their fantastic dance moves, they were nonetheless one of the most celebrated stage acts of the Jazz Age. They lived an opulent, adventuresome lifestyle that had them touring all over the world, funded by older wealthy male patrons.

Eventually, the two found their way to Hollywood. They didn't find much success in films, but continued to have a successful stage career until they split professionally in 1937.

[angelofsmalldeath-codeine]

We all love Pedro and want to see him succeed and get all the accolades he so much deserves and are well overdue, if you ask me.

Now, can we also remember he is a real person, with feelings, good and bad days and deserving of respect?

Pedro is also an affectionate person who shows his family and friends his love through touch. And it’s refreshing to see someone on the media who is true to themselves and isn’t afraid of showing that affection in public spaces. However, people take that and run straight into speculating about his sexuality as if it mattered.

We are all here talking about how we wish there were more men showing healthy masculinity and being affectionate. But when a man does it, the band wagon of speculation and criticism judging their sexuality gets so damn full it needs to take many trips. We can’t have it both ways (and no, this is not a bisexual joke).

Yesterday, on many different social media platforms, be it individuals’ profiles or media channels, there were comments on Pedro’s sexuality. They varied from the trousers he wore, the hugs he gave his friends, or because he kissed one of them on the lips. Then they jumped into speculating if he had a threesome with those people he showed affection to. He’s also never exposed his romantic life and relationships, and people take that as a license to comment.

My question is, why in the of year 2024 of our lord and saviour Dolly Parton, the obsession with other people’s sexuality still persists? Even worse, why is it festering among the people who supposedly support them? The fandom can become such a toxic space…

When he disappears for months, the same people complain of the content drought, people complain no stop. Has anyone even paused to wonder why he is no longer being so accessible as he used to be?

I’m happy that Pedro is finally getting the recognition for his work. He’s worked hard to get to where he is now. He deserved that Golden Globe and I hope he gets the Emmy. 2023 was a fantastic year for him and we have enough content from his fictional characters to write fics for years. From Joel to Tim Rockford to Mr Ben in his assembly era to Mando, we’ve been fed.

He’s got a lot of projects coming up in 2024 and I’m excited to see him shine.

Anyway, rant over and I will go stand on the corner awkwardly.

[sug3rcoated]

˚‧⁺ ･ ˖ ·Fantastic Dolly ⋰˚☆