#family writing

[desos-records]

Writing Sibling Characters

As told by an eldest child (birth order matters, more on that later)

If you’re an only child or find that having siblings is pretty far removed from writing them, this is your post.

I am a big fan of well-written sibling dynamics—probably because having a sibling and being a sibling is a big part of my life and I like seeing that kind of relationship in stories. It’s important to remember, however, that there are no set sibling dynamics; they depend pretty heavily on who your characters are as people, so I would focus on that first. There are always stereotypes, of course, but those are less fun. 

Also keep in mind that sibling dynamics, like most things, are impacted by culture and my White Western perspective will only help so much. As always, research is your friend!

Let’s say you have your developed characters already, but aren’t sure how to write their sibling relationship. Here are some things to consider:

Number

How many siblings there are in the family is like the foundation of sibling dynamics. The more children there are, the more parental attention has to be divided and that can impact children a lot. Too much attention and children may feel heavily criticized or monitored. Too little and children may develop behaviors for drawing attention. How a character grows up impacts who they are now, etc, etc. 

Birth Order

There are libraries full of books on this subject and I’m sure you’ve seen the memes about it, but birth order can determine a lot about sibling dynamics. 

Eldest siblings are the guinea pig child in a lot of ways. Their parent/guardians usually learned how to be a parent through trial and error with them. They get used to people analyzing their every move. Rules or expectations that the Eldest grew up with probably changed by the time the younger siblings came around. Often, eldest children are given some level of responsibility over their younger siblings and are expected to be ideal role models/secondary parental figures. Sometimes, once eldest siblings spend time away from family, they will break or otherwise go through a period of rebellion to compensate for the pressure to meet expectations.

Middle siblings, especially second children, get compared to their older sibling a lot. If the Eldest was the guinea pig, the second child is the follow up experiment to prove their parenting theories. They tend to deal with this pressure by either mimicking their older sibling exactly or intentionally being their opposite—that’s where the rule breaker middle child stereotype comes from. This comparison pressure tends to ease up with subsequent middle siblings.

Youngest siblings are often perceived by adult family members as something like the permanent baby of the family. Unless and until a younger person comes along, they will always be the newest, the one who needs the most help. Youngests tend to resent that treatment and will go through a lot of effort to be taken seriously and treated like an adult. They can be sensitive to people questioning their judgement or abilities as a result. OR they get so used to other people doing things for them that they learn how to manipulate people into continuing to treat them that way because it makes things easier for them. You’ve got about a 50/50 split either way.

I’ve noticed that, in families with more than three children, siblings will get sorted into sets based on how close they are in age—the two oldests and the two youngests or the oldest, the second oldest, and a trio of younger siblings, for example. This can break up stereotypical oldest/middle/youngest dynamics in really interesting ways.

Age Gap

My mother told me once that the birth order resets if there’s more than seven years age gap between siblings. I don’t know how true that is, but her oldest brother is twelve years older than her and that determined a lot about her relationship with him. Siblings with a large age gap may not be around younger siblings as much; they won’t grow up together in the same way that siblings closer in age do. They may act more like a secondary parent than a sibling or may not develop much of a relationship with younger siblings until they’re both adults. 

For siblings who are closer in age—anywhere from three years apart to twins—they usually grow up parallel to each other. They’re often close in a way that’s hard to explain because they have so many shared experiences. My brother and I rarely even need to talk to understand each other. These siblings are the type that can go from Brutal Enemies to Extremely Protective within seconds. I think it has something to do with people knowing each other their entire lives and going through such dramatic changes together.

Gender

Many people still raise boys and girls differently, so your character’s sex and gender may have an impact on their sibling dynamics (unless you, like, decided to get rid of the patriarchy entirely for your story, in which case, props to you). I know sets of girl siblings who share/steal each others clothes, but me and my brother have never done that. Siblings who are the same gender may get more closely compared than siblings who aren’t—one sister starts her period at an older age than the other and people make her feel bad for it, things like that. Boy siblings may be allowed more freedom and have less rules than girl siblings, such as curfew times or bans on dating. Girl siblings may have to do household chores when boy siblings don’t—my brother still claims to not know how to wash dishes; I’ve been doing it since I could hold a plate. A character being trans or non-binary may also impact aspects of their sibling dynamic—maybe it was their sister who taught them how to take care of long hair when they first started dressing the way they prefer or things like that. 

Parents/Guardians

Parents are, obviously, the main determining factor in how someone’s childhood plays out. They can determine a lot about sibling dynamics too. You’ve probably seen shitty fictional parents comparing their kids or blaming one for everything bad that happens, but that’s not what I’m talking about here. New parents tend to be less financially and emotionally stable than parents later in life (tend to, obviously this is not always the case). What happens here is that the older children will grow up with a very different environment than the younger ones. They may have had to go without certain things that are now freely available to their younger siblings and they might really resent that or try to make up for it when they’re older. They may have had to tip-toe around the emotions of their twenty-something parents in a way their younger siblings didn’t have to with their now thirty-something parents. The environment a parent creates for their children is shaped by who the parents are at that particular time.

Assumptions

I’ve noticed that people tend to assume that if something is true of one sibling, it will apply to all of them and that assumption can do some damage—teachers assuming the second child is a troublemaker or exceptionally talented at something, when they really aren’t. They also tend to expect siblings to hit life milestones in order, which is not usually how life works out. And these people can get really weirded out or even angry if the assumption they made turns out to be wrong. 

If you’ve read this far: tell me which fictional siblings are your favorites!

Anyways, hope this helped and happy writing!

[savvywords]

A Fractured Soul

Holy cow, I posted fanfic for the first time in... oh gosh. A long ass time. It is hearbreaking and full of angsty stuff. There is death, as a warning. 

You can find it here. 

[dearingbooks]

Mummy

[Prompt- Hey mum, how did you and dad meet?]

“Hey mum… how did you and dad meet?” My daughter gently muttered to the photo in her hands, perched on her bed, tears leaking from her tired eyes.

“Do you want me to tell you?” I asked, standing by the doorway of her room, she nodded slightly not looking up from the photo frame.

“There were constant rough gusts of wind colliding with the red flushed cheeks of your mothers. Flakes of snow making their home in between the strands of red locks falling graciously out of her head. Her hand grazed upon my own as we dawdled down the alley of trees, both not wanting to part ways at the end of the walk.

We were on our way home from a party, which sadly nowadays you will never experience- a Christmas party organised by your uncle. I made my way past the drunken dancers to the radiant and eye catching goddess waiting for her drink at the bar- your mother. She was rolling her eyes at every man approaching her; but not me. She didn't shun me away.

Danced until we were the last pair standing, others on the floor or out the door. She was, and still is a real life princess to me, like those in movies, so elegant and completely stunning.

In the early hours of the morning, when dancing evolved to tired swaying, your mother frightened to walk home unaccompanied by a strong man to protect her; I volunteered to chaperone the bewitching beauty home.

It was when your mother smiled at me for the first time I knew she was the woman I wanted to share a life with. No other women mattered from then on, it was your mother and I against the world, forever.

And when her gorgeous green orbs gazed into my own, I knew she felt the same way.

I miss her so much, I know you do too. I wish we could have saved her before it happened. She did not deserve to go like that… she was so beautiful. Her beauty was so unreal, still so stunning up to the last time I saw her.

[starplatinumnun]

can you infodump to me? (i love you) is this overwhelming? (i love you) is this the right texture? (i love you) is it ok to touch you? (i love you) do you want the subtitles on? (i love you) do you want to go somewhere less noisy? (i love you)

[darlingaces]

Character A was born without the magical abilities that the rest of their family possessed, and while they try not to let that get them down, they can’t help but feel resentful of their siblings, Characters B and C. 

Then, they meet Character D - who, also magicless, helps them come to terms with their lack and how to navigate in a world that doesn’t really accommodate them.

[she-who-fights-and-writes]

In my opinion, found family is so much funnier when it’s more like “these losers hold me hostage and won’t leave me alone”

[annarts05]

Fun Ways to Meet Characters

Thieves stealing important objects from the main characters and then being forced somehow into a found family situation

Saving a character’s life by doing something like taking an arrow/bullet

By losing a bet with a stranger and then teaming up

Gambling with a shifty character and getting really mad at them, only for them to later end up saving the other character’s life

Meeting the other in an arranged marriage and actually liking them (or really, really hating them)

Or having a chaotic dynamic where they irritate each other but they’re equally chaotic, so they become the mischievous duo in the found family

By bickering over the last piece of food at a banquet

Getting hired as a servant or maid, or some other serving position

By accidentally almost killing a character, only for them to join the found family and literally never stop bringing up that first meeting

[sweetiecutie]

You’re sad bc Draco cheated on you so you fuck his dad instead💖

Warnings: NSFW, infidelity, straight up nasty but hot lol

- Does it make you feel better, honey? - Lucius’ velvety voice droned on, his pale eyes watched you bouncing eagerly on his cock, big hands running up and down your sides, caressing your skin with skilled touches.

- So much better, thank you, Sir, - you stammered out, voice strained and trembling from all the pleasure rolling over your body in hot waves.

Lucius’ thin lips curled into a smug smirk at your breathless reply, and you exulted internally - how easy it was to manipulate this man into doing whatever you wanted just by pouting your lips prettily and looking up at him with those sad puppy eyes. Like father like son, you guessed.

Lucius’ hands came to gently cup your bouncing tits, thumbs flicking the nubs of your nipples lightly, making your head loll back at added pleasure.

- Never considered Draco an idiot, but he surely must be one if he let go of a woman like you, - you smiled coyly at older man’s words, masking your sneer skillfully. And that says a husband of Narcissa Black - the most precious woman in the world, and you would actually feel guilty and sorry for what you were doing right now if you didn’t know that there were no love between them from the very beginning.

So you just wrapped your arms around man’s strong neck, leaning closer in for him to pepper kisses all over your neck and chest, speeding up the snapping of your hips, impaling yourself over and over again on his throbbing thick cock. You could feel the tight knot starting to unravel itself in the pit of your stomach, hands gripping tightly on Lucius’ biceps and moaning out his name so sweetly as he thrusted up into your squelching pussy from his position underneath you, you body oh so soft under his fingers.

Malfoy crashed his lips onto yours, both your moans and heavy breathing mixing together as you reached your orgasms - strong shudder running through your tired body as Lucius spilled deep inside your pussy, coating your plushy walls with his spent.

And you were sure that you heard a door creaking open quietly through your orgasmic delirium and could almost physically feel a pair of grey eyes, resembling his father’s ones so closely, staring onto your back fiercely.

Likes, reblogs and comments are highly appreciated. Give writers some love - feedback is the thing that inspires us on creating more new content💖

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

Phantom: *Kicks down the doors of the Titans Tower*

Titans core four: *Getting ready to fight"

Phantom: Which one of you is Superboy?

Kon:

Kon: Me obviously *gesturing to the large S on his chest*

Phantom: Cool. What custody days do you want?

Kon: You're going to have to explain

Phantom: *partially unravels the bundle of blankets to reveal a baby with kryptonian blue eyes*

Phantom: Congrats! You're a dad!

Kon: Oh god the card I got in the mail wasn't a prank

Phantom: Nope. Help me name him.

Tim: I have so many questions

Phantom: I have so few answers

Cassie: Thats not comforting

Phantom: I woke up in a mad scientists laboratory 200 years in the future to find out i have a clone baby with someone I've never heard of and everyone I knew and love is likely dead.

Kon:

Cassie:

Tim:

Phantom: If anyone needs comforting here its me

Nightwing: *the only adult in this situation* Okay, how about we talk about this. I'm sure the Justice League will be happy to help you and your baby

[chaosinterlude]

“lucifer is sadistic and mean!! he’s so serious and scary!!”

meanwhile,

he’s just a silly man who wishes for a domestic life with his partner and dog <3

[inkskinned]

oh, i love the way relationships develop their own personal language of love. when all that joy shows the way they love you. i love when it is a little icon to who they are, to how you get along with them.

my sister takes a picture of a dead bug and sends it to me - this is you. my friend asks me how the move is going; she put a reminder in her phone to check up on me. i put a piece of ice down my friend's back, he returns the favor by holding my phone over my head and making me jump to catch it. jason and i scream-sing green day while going all of 15 miles an hour down country roads. molly is who i go to for a quiet night in with 5 dollar wine.

i go out for dinner with them and have to step outside to take a phone call; when i come back they've ordered my favorite appetizer without needing to be asked. andrew and i have a long-standing tradition of him picking me up to spike me directly into the first soft-looking surface around. i don't even need to speak to my best friend - she and i will just look at each other and have an entire conversation. burst out laughing at 3 PM, high and cackling like we're evil witches. i just moved by myself into a new city - my brother keeps introducing me to his friends that now live close to me. he always says - oh yeah, this is sibling and then pretends to ignore me. for days now, my family has been in and out of my apartment, just tinkering with things; making sure i am settling in nicely.

i usually have watermelon instead of cake for my birthday; kim forces a full yankee candle into the rind so i can have something to blow out and wish on. for 20 minutes on a saturday, all us grown adults crawl into one bed to have a cuddle puddle like we're in high school again. every 20 seconds someone starts giggling, and then we're laughing again. nick calls me from california; we both groan about the price of tickets, agonizing. miranda and i meet up in the city for the first time in years - without discussing it beforehand, the minute we lay eyes on each other, we both strike gruesome little gremlin poses instead of waving. dean always goes for the hug. joe always does a single firm handshake. sometimes i think about my friends and get so happy i just start crying.

oh, how wonderful to live in a world where affection is biologically ingrained in us. how wonderful that affection helps us build our single greatest strength - community. how wonderful that affection is our body's way of saying - thing is good, let's keep. how wonderful, this language, this skein we weave! to show the other person - i might not always say it. but i love that you live in me.

[everysongineverykey]

dhmis is great because imagine a series centered around three roommates living in a small incredibly isolated house in a story run by a strange omnipotent woman with unclear motivations who amuses herself by tormenting the roommates over and over again in various awful ways by dangling something new and exciting in front of their faces and then making it backfire horribly thus traumatizing them all and often maiming and killing them and they can't escape because they're nothing but puppets in her little show and they're chained to a narrative that will not let them go and one roommate is a naive kid with a sadistic father who traumatizes him horribly when he isn't neglecting him and also eats people and another roommate is almost aware of his situation but will never be able to save himself or his friends and is constantly rejected by his own kind and only wants to leave the tiny house but nothing, no one, will play along and the third roommate is caught in the middle, not a naive child but not quite meta aware, and thus is doomed to fall victim to the same traps over and over and also they're literally the only three people in their entire world besides the evil things that keep intruding in their home and terrorizing them and they can't call for help. ok and now imagine they look like this

[wutheringmights]

I like the found family trope as much as the next person but it really irks me to see so many dynamics forced into replicating the nuclear family. That’s not even an original take. Other people have said it. It just bugs me in particular since I really hate it when this dynamics results in uneven emotional labor between characters who should be equals otherwise

[reineydraws]

every time i see someone talk about a damian on my dash, it's always like, "is it wayne or desmond?"

(btw the al ghul wayne family portrait--and anya's grapple gun in the first image--is based off this forger family portrait)

[twelfthellies]

「 ᵇᵉᶜᵃᵘˢᵉ ʷᵉ ʷᵒʳᵏ. ʷᵉ ˢʰᵒᵘˡᵈⁿ'ᵗ ᵇᵘᵗ ʷᵉ ᵈᵒ 」

[iguessthisisanewobsession]

Jason doesn’t know why he did it.

Maybe it was because of the alcohol in his system or maybe it was his subconscious still being salty about his family’s comments about him not having many hobbies.

He reads!

What’s wrong with reading!?

Sure, it was mainly about work now a days but that’s besides the point!

Apparently it wasn’t good enough to be counted as a ‘hobby’ by the others.

So when he was walking back from a bar on his night off and got hit in the face with flyer about auditions for the local theater group Mixed up Manhattan he stuffed it in his pocket and said “fuck it”.

Needless to say he was mildly confused when he woke up the next day to a call back for JD from Heathers the musical.

He was more confused when he found out his “Veronica” was being played by a dude.

Turns out Mixed up Manhattan was a group who did not care about gender as long as you could bring a character to life.

Now he was in too deep to back out, if he was going to act out a scene with someone. Than he was going to put his whole dick and balls into it.

It was only fair for “Veronica” after all.

~~~~~

Danny was slightly surprised when he went back to callbacks and saw Drunk Dude in the group.

Danny found him silly and charming in the waiting room the other night but he was clearly intoxicated when he auditioned. Danny thought that the chances of seeing him again was very slim.

But there he was, looking a little bit out of his comfort zone.

Did he even remember auditioning?

As they were called up for a scene he flashed the other a smile and felt his core loosen with the other guy’s shoulders.

Turns out, Jason had some good singing chops.

~~~~~~~~

Jason Todd lands a lead in a musical.

The musical about death and sex.

His family must never know.

The second one of them finds out his life is over again.

They will go out of their way to embarrass Jason in front of Danny and there will go the whole dark and mysterious thing he has been trying to do.