#family is my weak point
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I'm very normal about them. I haven't been thinking about this idea non-stop for the last 2 weeks. I've actually been very sane and normal like everyone else.
#diego brando#dio brando#jjba#fanart#my art#brando brothers#wholesome#family is my weak point#ill always shed a tear for siblings being silly together#im dead on the floor#in a pool of my own tears and blood#glittery pink blood#im okay
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Actually thinking more about Reiju's only sin being a woman and... Going into more depth, I know that logically/canonically she's smart and empathetic enough to not want to be in her brothers' place. She doesn't want to be an heir/ successor or follow the family's footsteps at all. She knows they're bad. She sees herself as such, too, unable to change/be different like Sanji was. She doesn't think she can bring her mother's kindness to this world the way Sanji does, so she sticks to what she knows, whether it is to protect Sanji too or to accept her fate.
BUT (and bear with me for a second here, I know I have been watching too much Succession lately) we also do know that during her childhood she didn't do anything to help Sanji from the abuse. She watched it happen because that was the way things went there and because she knew what would happen to her if she did. Of course, she ends up helping him escape and taking care of him but-- I'm just thinking, for a tiny little moment, about how she's actually the oldest.
She should be the heir. She should be the person everybody views Ichiji as. She should be considered the most responsible. The smartest. The strongest one. The one who should take the throne. And she doesn't even want it now, but what about back then? What about when she did have some little, tiny faith/hopes for her family and what they did? She sought approval and naively thought "my father is going to offer me the place I rightfully deserve, right?" blindly seeking acceptance like all of them did.
But no, because she might be the oldest but Ichiji is a man. She might be the strongest, the smartest, the most reliable... But she is not a man. And I believe there must have been a time when she expected her destiny to be something more, and once she realized she was just a woman in their eyes... Well, we know what happened.
I just keep finding similarities between The Vinsmokes (OP) and The Roys (Succession) and perhaps my headcanon of Reiju being similar to Shiv has gone a bit too far. But the scene where Shiv is like "This is real?" when Logan promises she'll be the CEO and he goes "This is real. Remember this. The slant of light" for it to be a lie later is something I fear could have happened with Reiju and Judge if Oda had given us more content,,,,
#guys i might be mentally ill when it comes to the vinsmokes i keep making up content and background that does not exist#ik reiju's character doesn't focus on this/the whole point is her being treated as just a woman bc of having feelings & yet being reliable#but let me dream of a more complex story behind all of this okay#she ends up helping sanji bc she refuses to keep seeing him suffer but what if something else had also happened back thennn#what if judge had destroyed her hopes of something more??? and with that she realizes first-hand how shitty everything is#and she also hates herself for not having helped sanji sooner#and she does believe it IS a bit sanji's fault for being weak but she's also aware that that weakness is kindness#i am very sad this is so shiv and roman coded i am jumping off a bridge#roman and sanji being similar is also on my list btw#not fully sanji bc i also think roman applies to niji but there's some stuff there okay#“what have you got on your fucking hand?” “idk fucking love?” is something so sanji to me okay okay#but at the end of the day isn't sanji just tom wambsgans in this essay i will-#one piece#vinsmoke reiju#vinsmoke judge#vinsmoke family#succession#shiv roy#robin stop mentioning succession this is an anime blog
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Something I love about ATLA is that it doesn't force the "forgive the villain" on all the characters. It's been left clear that Ozai is a bad person, and there's no chance of redemption; the only reason he's not dead yet is because Aang is a pacifist
The one episode where a character is supposed to forgive someone who has hurt them in the past is the one where Katara is off to kill a man (which, fair) and Zuko helps. In that episode, even if Aang is telling her to let go, she doesn't forgive him. She never will. But she spares him. Not because she thinks he doesn't deserve death (he does), but because she's not willing to continue the cycle of violence
Killing someone can have a very important impact in your entire being, mostly depending on who you are as a person. Aang would've never recovered from killing Ozai. Katara wouldn't be who she is now, had she taken her revenge on the man that killed her mother
And the best part of it is that Ozai doesn't deserve to die. Not in a "I'm defending him" way (ew), but in a "he deserves worse that than" way
Taking away his bending was the perfect punishment for him. He believed bending made you superior and he never cared enough to train something besides his bending. What a loser. Zuko and Azula wouldn't be restrained by something like that
He's alive. Nobody has forgiven him. Nobody ever will
#on a “ozai deserves smth worse than death” mood#which is. my everyday mood but we're not talking about that#read a fic where ppl were mad ozai was still alive#zuko clarified that he's still alive not only bc that's what aang wanted but bc death would be a mercy for him#that's the man who ruined everybody's life(s). you can't tell me we can just let him die like that#and they're not even torturing him. he's just in prison#but he's so fucking weak that not having his bending = torture#pathetic#honestly what did he even do? his entire family was better than him#zuko was better at any kind of fighting and he learned firebending from the fucking dragons#azula is. azula! she bends blue fire and is the best at lighting n stuff#iroh created a whole new bending technique and broke out of prison w no bending#ursa killed the fucking fire lord#i mean sure ozai can shoot lighting out of his hands. but so can iroh! so can azula!#his 14 year old daughter is better than him#she could kick his ass if she wanted#but that's her dad right there and the obssession she has w pleasing him is straight up unhealthy#man. poor azula#anyways back to the point: ozai is pathetic#loserlord indeed#atla#avatar the last airbender#fire lord ozai#zuko#aang#katara#azula#uncle iroh#avis' post#avis talks
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Please try to find some sort of therapy or something because you have So so much more potential and worth than you think you do and its earnestly so saddening to see you resigning yourself to a fate you don't deserve
its ok because its my own fault honestly :[ im going to try to stop complaining now that it's just becoming more and more evident that im just choosing not to take da reins of my own life
#anonymous#skunk mail#im trying to get myself back to optimism#bc there Is a rare potential opportunity for me#but i dont think im going to take it or the other help offered#the stuff i have going on with my family is far too complicated#on top of now thinking my life would be worse if i moved im going to be honest and say i literally dont want to waste 8 hrs of the day if i#can help it.#ill be struggling to keep myself alive much less draw and if my art improvement stagnates even MORE i#dont know whats the point of sticking around#im literally just useless member of society and actively deciding to do so#so obviously im not going to get anything i want nor do i deserve it. im not willing to put#the work in. its too difficult. i dont want anything that much.#its my own fault#idk how ill feel in a few months once ive missed my only chance but its how i feel now#i was so determined and resolved for a few months and was even planning but all it took was one conversation#to bring me back to reality so how would i even survive on my own if im this weak and naïve lol#i dont know.#delete later
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shanks' need/desire to protect his friends and family from anything and everything vs buggy's gigantic inferiority complex that makes him take any act of protection/love as someone looking down on him, FIGHT
#buggy could trip and shanks could catch him bc god forbid buggy hurts his knees#and instead of saying thank you buggy just goes: what? you think i can't handle hitting my knees? you think im too weak?#what this man needs is the world's most patient therapist#and on the other end i think shanks' desire to protect his friends and family does come off as condescending smtimes#and like all of his emotions are dialed up to a 100 when it comes to buggy#and so at a certain point it does come off as possessive and off-putting and i think that's why buggy chafes at it so much#bc buggy barely belongs to himself as is and i don't think he could handle all of shanks' desire#like buggy already thinks he's weak and cowardly. less than in every sense and then on top of that to have shanks protect him??#it would ruin him i think#and like of course shanks doesn't understand!!! what is there to understand when you've always been good at everything?#he loves his people and he loves buggy especially so and he wants to take care of them!! all the power he has is just a tool he uses to kee#them safe. and i do think there is a voice in shanks' head that says 'just take buggy. he can't resist anyway. you could keep him safe by#your side. he'd never be in danger at your side. just take him' but shanks knows that's one step too far and so he never does it.#anyway the occupy way too much of my brain space these days#one piece#buggy the clown#op buggy#buggy one piece#akagami no shanks#op shanks#shanks one piece#shuggy#shanks x buggy
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OUT OF THE THOUSANDS OF ANGST FICS I'VE READ, THE ONLY ONE THAT MADE ME CRY WAS A FUCKING ANGST FIC ABOUT 42 AND HIS DAD, I CAN'T I'M LITERALLY SO FUCKING WEAK RIGHT NOW
#family angst#family angst is my one and only weak point#I cant cant cant cant#family is my weak spot#ACTUALLT FUCK THAT DADS ARE MY WEAK SPOT#I CAN'T#I FEEL SO SAD FOR MILES IN THAT FIC#OH MY GOD#THAT MADE ME SERIOUSLY QUESTION THE TIME I HAD LEFT WITH MY DAD THATS SO FUCKING HEARTBREAKING FOR ME#ı love my dad#lemme just add that there#jefferson davis#jefferson morales#42 miles morales#miles g morales#spiderverse miles#miles morales#across the spiderverse#beyond the spiderverse#earth 42#miles gonzalo morales#you can't do this to me#I'LL FIND YOU AO3 DAD ANGST WRITERS#I'LL FIND YOU!!!!
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*slams hands on the table in sudden realization*
STAR SAPPHIRE DAMIAN WAYNE
#iwctw (time travel)#my writing#mine#damian wayne#damian al ghul#prerobin Damian wayne#batfam#batfamily#batman#bat fam#bat family#//#IT WORKS IT WORKS IT WORKS!!!#HE HAS CARRIED SO MUCH LOVE!!! HE HAS SUFFERED SO MUCH LOSS!! HE LOVES THEM STILL DESPITE IT ALL AND AT GREAT PERSONAL COST!!!!!#And /YES/ that applies to /all/ of my time traveling Robins but Dami’s actively fuckingaround with space shit alright alright#Oh my god imagine meeting the newest Star Sapphire to be active on Earth and it’s this. Fuckin’. 5yr old boy dressed like a magical girl.#The first thing he does after introducing himself is pointing out a major weakness thatmakes it very easy to kill you so you can work on it.#He comes up to your hip. He has a pink fuckin’ lightsaber. You’re pretty sure he’s quietly plotting your murder as we speak.
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theres something so odd about how team skull is characterized in the anime. like. in the games theyre a nuisance with a sad backstory to them and they take it out through rage, especially guzma. them teaming up with the aether foundation comes across as lusamine manipulating guzma tbh, like hes just a lackey to her
and then in the anime they water down how gross aether was by limiting the crimes to just faba being a dick instead of the entire foundation being complicit, and in return team skull has their backstory ignored for the most part and theyre perfectly willing to gang up on and hurt a six year old cause she told them not to be mean. like yes they were villains in the game but that just feels weird for them
#guzma in particular is. ouch#first off i hate that they went ‘’oh guzma doesn’t understand his goliopsods ability ha ha he just thinks its epic and nothing else’’#when the subtle symbolism of him having a goliopsod considering his motive and backstory is SO good#and it matches his actions in the story too when he starts hiding in ultra space instead of staying with lusamine#cause despite being a big bad boss… hes still that scared weak little kid.#like hes one of the better written antagonists why did you do that to him#yeah i know they couldnt have gotten away with implying his dad beat him like in the games but its weird#how a show so focused on family doesnt seem to care abt guzma having a troubled past at all#idek if he makes a family with team skull cause i cant tell beyond him calling them brothers#it comes across more like he just finds them to be annoying lackeys at certain points#idk maybe ill change my mind during ash vs guzma but i dont like it so far#also why did kiawe’s parents send their 6 year old on a boat to another island unchaperoned#echoed voice#sm lb
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on a different note from the previous post: if anyone has any specific recc's for D.C comics series to catch up on ( old or new, as i've never been good at keeping up + could never afford to regularly buy comics irl ) let me know. bonus points if they're not batf.amily-related, but you know i love them too so y'know give me what you got.
#☽—— ⸢ ooc ⸥#d c /#.tbd.#btw i literally don't care if it's pre-5.2 or post. like i know i was pissy when the reboot happened but idc anymore LMAO#i'd say my weak points (that i'm interested in expanding at least) would be stuff regarding the fl.ash family#green ar.row / bl.ack canary / that stuff#& DEFINITELY teen tit.ans. like unironically i've never actually watched or read a single /dedicated/ t.itans thing#i'm currently reading bat.man urb.an legends and enjoying it overall!
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its so funny recognizing yourself in your parents and by funny i mean im going to be sick
#i hate my mother. i love my mother. i will always be her child. i will always be a stranger. i hate my mother. i love my mother.#like same woman who points a gun at me on the regular and mocked and laminated my suicide note when i was a kid to pass out at a family bbq#and the same reason i have such bad body image issues and chemical scars and burns.#but also. thats my mother. its the same woman who married a stranger because her two kids were homeless under a bridge after#my bio dad stole her car. its the same woman who held my hair back when i was sick as a child. who made cookies when i was depressed.#its the same woman who i had to talk down because she wanted to kill herself before she hit me and called me weak.#i miss my mother. i dont know if i ever had a mother. i love her. i need to move and never be around her.#its so difficult when you KNOW she has mental illness that runs in the family too. i know what impacts her behavior and how alike we are.#i know its not an excuse for the consistent abuse she still puts me through. i know this. i know i shouldn't feel guilty for my feelings.#i dont know what my feelings are.#i hate my mother to the point ive tried to kill myself to not be around her. i love her more than anyone else.#when your mother is a prophecy of all you might be as youre a reflection of all she could have been *family guy death pose.jpeg*#anyways. sorry for the rant heehee i am normal and going to bed before i craw out my skin and into some yellow wallpaper ^_^
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late Carlo and Moretti (during vinci-moretti war) are like Luca and Clemente to me. Moretti will never raise his hand on Carlo but! will he drive him into guilt in ways that are not direct? insult him in passing? convince Carlo that he's doing everything wrong, when in fact it's the opposite? of course such a painful kick to Carlo's ego, it's unfair, he doesn't deserve it. and it's not a father-son relationship, it's a professional relationship and he can't say anything back & defense himself in any way maybe Moretti's more favorable to Eddie in this period because he's more blindly loyal and Carlo feels he's about to explode
#^ i wrote it before that hounds thing but its about all this anger was once love etc#carlo who is a capo who has done so many terrible things for this place watching how eddie gets bonus points for blind loyalty: 😐#and it's not even that he's a capo it's that carlo says the right things but moretti dismisses him every time#also ok😬😬😬my truth! is that eddie really was against killing moretti at first#and when he finally decides to support carlo well. is it just a change of master? (yes)#m2#moretti family#and!#as far as i understand Moretti's murder took place just a few days before his victory? fucked up thing#i mean. it just makes Carlo an even shitty man. he chose himself over the majority#(i can't think about any war theme on a physical level at this point so. i have only abstract thoughts on this)#but objectively: moretti family may have gained control of the vinci family's territory of influence etc#instead they got a young crazy don. and everyone was alright w it (?!makes me think for what reason)#which is why i think there's been something wrong with Moretti in his last yrs. he looks much older thank frank n leo#for now he's just an old man stubbornly clinging to power to me. but not to say that i worked on his character much#i think he became weaker hypochondriacal and paranoid towards the end. “i saw his hands trembling” carlo bout moretti etc#“akela missed his kill!” and the young wolves tore him apart#ewwwwwwwwwww no Carlo who sees Moretti growing weaker and instinctively his teeth are bared more and more ewww#kill the weak and old so the young can survive😬😬 (fucked up thing is that they aren't animals they would survive w moretti in charge)#spoiled hounds parallel makes things so much complicated tbh. but it feels right
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I will probably cave and watch the fall of the house of usher anyways but let it be stated for the record that I do not and never will like flanegans work
#its the themelessness for me....#if you pay attention to how he writes/frames you can tell that beneath the veneer of a Family Redeems and Love Conquers theme#there actually isnt any salient consistency with the Why#at my most generous hes going for a 'your loved ones are complicated individuals capable of hurt but you should still love and forgive them'#but he never crafts an argument as to why that should happen besides the Bad Things Happening that comprise the plot of a horror production#and im not saying that you shouldnt forgive people but just that an artistic production that centers it thematically#ahould be able to make that argument on its own two legs#also he writes all women as smarmy#and makes them suffer the greatest narrative consequences despite often having minimal roles in the cycles of violence the plot centers#but he makes absolutely no cogent point that transforms it into a commentary on misogyny instead of another iteration of it#and the way he paces dialogue and sets characters on these patronizing monologues just artistically is weak imo#but will i watch the new one? probably 😔
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90s Raphael’s characterization between the first movie and the next two is interesting. Could make for a good fic.
I love Raph's characterisation across the 90s trilogy.
There are so many little things I could point out, but overall, I love that he's a little guy with big feelings! He doesn't always know what to do with them given he's a teenager with sensory issues and trauma. I love his strong convictions about right and wrong and justice and helping others and protecting his family and bystanders. I love watching this kid who spent fifteen years in isolation discover what he wants and fight for it.
Splinter tells him and his brothers their whole lives (as gently as possible) that the world above will never understand or accept them, but Raph carves out a place for himself anyway. He must have brought home so many strays growing up, and then he brings home three humans who change their lives. As he gets to know April, Casey, and Keno, he learns that he craves connection, a wider social circle than his family can offer. He wants people to know he exists. And we see how much he wants, but the price to have it is too steep. Because he can't reveal himself to the whole world and protect his family; he can't live in ancient Japan and have them, too. Despite so desperately wanting more, he chooses his family every time. I love when tmnt media and fandom explore these aspects of Raph.
My 90s fics tend to focus on how Raph is harmed by their conflict with the Foot Clan.
Sunset is my take on some of the missing hours between Raph's capture and rescue from Foot HQ.
Wrestling imagines how Raph might've broken down after the first two movies given everything he went through.
Thanks for the ask =)
#rewatched parts of the movies to help answer this and man i forgot how much i love 90s raph#i like to think he was a very weepy toddler/little kid who liked to snuggle#but at some point began to perceive that as a weakness and now he shouts and punches when really he wants to cry and be held#but! it's okay! because his family still makes sure he gets those things#in the first movie splinter can tell raph is upset when he comes home#so he calls him to his side to offer wisdom and comfort him#his brothers know he needs space sometimes and are more than willing to give it#but don still reaches out first when he sees how upset raph is about losing his sai#and you can tell raph is so uncomfortable stewing in stress and uncertainty#that sometimes he lashes out at leo or don or someone that will push back and start a fight#but there's this sweet scene when they come back from the farmhouse#where raph expresses frustration that they don't immediately set out to look for splinter#so leo calmly reminds him that they need rest and it does seem to settle his mind!#and all the bros are physically affectionate with each other and splinter and april#gah it just makes me very happy#that he struggles but has a loving family and that doesn't erase his struggles but they still help and love him a lot#both of these fics are from a raph-centric event i participated in back in march by the way!#raphael splinterson#tmnt 1990s#tmnt#my asks#whattrainofthought#writing off the rails
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something i was thinking about on stand yesterday.. danganronpa shsl lifeguard who tries to save a dying person they find, bonus points if they dont come clean about it at first because they think they actually killed that person with their efforts
#or if they do actually kill them which would be really tragic. this happens in chapter 4 of course#ok i actually put way too much thought into this. to put it into perspective i had shifts with 5 hours on stand saturdsy and sunday#i thought of it on saturday 20 mins in. so this concept has been in my brain for a while#anywayyy im thinking she had some pretty high profile eddie aikau type saves and got a little famous off that#AND is always offering to help people#so for the sake of writing another tragic athlete yuri ch4: i think the victim in her case is someone who is adamant about not wanting help#like a woman playing a sport typically seen as being manly (american football rugby wrestling etc etc)#im imagining shes from a family of pretty good (male) athletes and is constantly dealing with comparisons to portray her as weaker#she wont accept help or medical assistance because she thinks it makes her weak. which is a trait female characters should have more#so you get two really valid worldviews and its debatable whether the victim actually needed medical assistance/help or if it#just made things worse#anyway im imagining the ending of the previous chapter shows a black screen with#'unknown: hey hey are you okay?'#and ms life guard tries to give her situationship a slightly dignified resting place so we dont discover the body for a little while#not too long but a little while#actually i think the lifeguard killing the athlete with chest compressions would make a really compelling scenario#where the actual person with murderous intent was someone who poisoned or near-fatally hit the athlete#and they get to walk free (under extreme suspicion from other students) while the girl who got sooo close to saving her dies#lifeguard could be someone whos easily distracted but locks in while on duty to the point where shes like a different person#but slipping up and breaking the athletes rib (or whatever) was her one moment of panic#because she cared about the victim on a personal level#i neednto be sedated so i shut the fuck up. tomorrow is the first day of school bro#i DID say i had 10 hours to think about this
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I got the second Conan tcg boosters today, and the website I got them from already lists the next booster and next starter deck as being BO related. Now, I don't know enough about the website with regards to listings that are so early they haven't had an official announcement yet, so who knows if that's really the next theme. However, it does make me question how all that's going to work.
Like. Everything released so far has theming. Conan blue, Heiji green, Kid white, Amuro gold, and Akai red. Each theme groups up the characters you get with who everyone's associated with. And in the mix of all of that, we do have some BO black cards: Gin, Vodka, Vermouth, Kir, and Criminal.
So. I'm sure a starter deck is fine. The BO has enough members and disguises and such to fill out a deck. But with the limited amount of BO members, having the ones that exist and a starter deck and enough to make them a sixth theme for cards feels. Like they'd either be overusing the BO members we know, or they're expanding who the category applies to. Like, it might be for memorable criminals in general. But if it's expanded into its own full theme, competing with the other five, I feel like it'd make the future collections more cluttered.
And maybe I just like having the BO cards be randomly hidden among the boosters. It feels nice finding one, like they just snuck in. Not sure I want a full blast of BO alongside the themed deck.
#I'll also admit a part of me just wants it all to slow down#I recognize that tcg in general just release constantly and the point is exchange money for cardboard with art#...But man; i like Pokemon too and the sites with cards put me in direct view of cool pkmn stuff#I'm trying to save up for a family vacation we're planning next year and this is not making it easy#(My own fault i know; and my finances are fine)#(I'm just not used to being blasted in the face by temptation and I'm weak)
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japanese medical negligence will drive you to american without health insurance behaviors
#hi hi hello tumblr#my migraines came back with a vengence#i didn't realize it for the 10 years i've had them#but i am pretty sure they were hemiplegic this whole time#got weakness and numbness down one side of my body from my first migraine ar 12 or 13#and just thought that was normal migraine with aura#others on my dad's side of the family (the white people) had sever migraines too so i grew up thinking it was normal#come to think of it in 10 years even an introvert like me has met 20-30 people with migraine and none of them had symptoms like mine#well this time i had leg numbness and weakness to the point of foot drop start on sunday#puking intensely wednsday - thursday#the headache finally came friday#blurred vision throughout...but i had a prolonged aura w out headache last month that didn't quite resolve#headache and nausea and vision has calmed but won't totally go away now#this whole time they worked me up for stroke and autoimmune diseases#and when that comes back normal and i say i'm pretty sure that was all a turbo migraine#the doctor starts googling migraine in front of me and is like well...you have symptoms of it but i don't know#this is a NEURO mind you not a general internist#i begged for him to nuke the way past 3 days status migraine with steroids like in the US#told they don't do that in japan#i asked to try reyvow#no to that because “my other symtoms are worse and that's only for the headache part”#i asked for a headache specialist#told none was available#eventually was kicked to the curb with 10 nausea pills and my records to take somewhere else#my foot perked up a bit after the headache started but is still droopy and weak#when i asked about PT i got “well you can still walk”#and when i said it catches on the ground and i trip sometimes and i can't walk quickly without dragging my leg i was told “well walk slowly#not even recommended home exercises#so now i'm on physical therapy YouTube trying to rehab my own fucking foot drop#i will try to find a neuro who knows about hemiplegic migraine and will treat status migraines agressively
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