#falmerblood elixir

[forgottenbones]

Quantum Mysticism is Stupid (Deepak Chopra, Spirit Science, Actualized.org)

[ervona]

Brand-Shei for the character asks? :D

MY LAD... <3

My first impression another victim of our questing... I totally framed him on my first playthrough as I was playing an evil character. but I did feel bad

My impression now my buddy :) he's one of my fave npcs in the game I even had him marry my Merry though I've been having second thoughts about where I want to take their characters but I still like them together

Favorite thing about that character he's... realistic? idk how to phrase it but he's just a guy, just living his life and trying to keep his head down but he's still afforded an interiority that npcs like this often aren't given in games, because their role is just that. so he feels like a character unlike most npcs of Skyrim at least to me and he just has an endearing personality

Least favorite thing his quest and timeline is kinda poorly thought out and caused so much headaches to me to the point that I rewrote quite a bit of it

Favorite line/scene

(While Madesi remains skeptical, Brand-Shei will decide that Falmerblood Elixir may be a good investment, and chooses between a few random lines:) Brand-Shei: "I can't afford to get one, but can I afford not to?"

Favorite interaction that character has with another

Shadr: "Brand-Shei, did you hear about Helgen? It's... it's gone! A dragon burned it to the ground!" Brand-Shei: "Yes, I heard. I think all of Skyrim knows by now." Shadr: "Do you... do you think that could happen here? I mean, could a dragon come here and burn the city down?" Brand-Shei: "I don't know. All we can do is hope the Eight will favor us and have these creatures stay far away from Riften."

interesting because he said the Eight... why? he probably grew up with an argonian religion (Sithis and Hist) so what's the story here

A character that I wish that character would interact with more

MADESI... they don't even have regular banter like with some other npcs... I just want to know what their relationship is like beyond the scene where he's framed. also any reason to recommend this fic as among other things it expands these two and other Riften people...

Another character from another fandom that reminds me of that character genuinely Bloom from Winx Club

A headcanon about that character my take on his quest is basically a big headcanon so yeah. he left Black Marsh with some of his relatives during the Umbriel Crisis, he balanced trying to find work and trying to find anything about where he came from... he'd lost most of his family after all and he would outlive the rest. it's not a good time for him, depressed, he doesn't have much to do but try and find some purpose... around decades into this period he meets Merry and they start searching together. she feels strongly about it, she also wants to know more about her past but she'll settle for helping others. in that is how I'd resolve his quest earlier, because the canon timeline feels off... it's one of those moments (multiple) where the game acts like events of the past century or two were much more recent. that's my take

A song that reminds of that character

An unpopular opinion about that character I don't think he'd have a magical Winx arc so to speak... to be fair I don't value the Telvanni as a group or institution at all but even if I did I know he wouldn't fit in with his personality as is, if he went to find distant relatives and get into the world of sorcery, he'd leave a tad disappointed at least if not completely changed for the worse. that's another thing I want to address in a fic if I get to it so yeah... finding answers to where he came from is wonderful but would it be a good ending for him to take up the noble heir position? hmm

Favorite picture I like this one where I edited his face a tad and recruited him as a follower for Merry... unfortunately I lost this save and preset but I can just do it again, I only gave him a bigger nose and smp hair :)

[quicksilverdrabbles]

Kaidan: Vee, I've been wanting to ask you.

Veda: Hm? What's up, Kai?

Kaidan: Back in the Riften market, you looked upset when Brynjolf was talking about his "Falmerblood Elixir". Why was that?

Veda: Oh.. You noticed. Guess I got too caught up in being pissed that he was making a lie about the snow elves.

Kaidan: You're not fond of them?

Veda: Quite the opposite, actually. I had to be the only Dwemer in the first era to openly protest against the enslavement of the snow elves. It breaks my heart to see what they've turned into.

Kaidan: Is that why we don't kill them? You usually tell me and the others to stay behind while you sneak through them.

Veda: Yes.

Kaidan: ... If you don't mind my saying, it seems there's a bit of trauma behind your relationship with the snow elves. If you don't mind sharing, of course.

Veda: Hah. I suppose I owe you that much. My family was of a noble house in the first era. We had our own family of snow elves to command. When I got older, I realized their child, a girl around my age, had learned Illusion magic to hide the fact she had been eating non-toxic mimics of the fungi that made them blind. A trick she'd learned from her parents, no doubt, except they truly were blind. I took her as my own 'slave' in an attempt to protect her. I never treated her horribly. When we were alone I wouldn't give her orders. After some time had passed, I gave her a name. Snow elves didn't.. they weren't given names. Hers was Lumikki, but I always called her Lumi. She was.. amazing. At magic, at healing... Despite her conditions, she was beautiful. When the snow elves rebelled in Blackreach, Lumi told me to escape so I wouldn't be hurt. But I wouldn't leave without her.

Kaidan: Aye? And then what happened?

Veda: The numidium. Kagrenac. My entire species, my family. All stolen to the Void. We had just managed to escape Alftand when it happened. I can't.. I can't even imagine what it must have been like for her. She'd been in the city all her life, and for me to be gone, and her to be alone above ground..

Kaidan: ... Did you love her?

Veda: .. I did. And how horrible is that? *laughing* To fall in love with a snow elf that my family enslaved? Her attachment to me had to be because I was the only person in that hell that ever showed her kindness aside from her parents. For all I know, she was only truly happy when she was rid of me, and she was free. Maybe she never mourned my disappearing. She could have revelled in it, in the knowledge that my kind would never hurt her again.

Kaidan: Vee, I can't see anyone seriously hating you. I'm sure she was heartbroken when you were taken.

Veda: *sigh* The nights before I met you and the others, I couldn't help but wonder how many years ago she might have died. Snow Elves are said to be able to live for thousands, you know? Even then.. It's been too many years, hasn't it? Maybe someone killed her, maybe she died of old age. And when I escaped the void, realized I was alone.. I thought that maybe I had escaped so I could join her, and not be stuck in an eternal stasis like the rest of my people.

Kaidan: *grabbing her by the shoulders* Don't even say that. If Lumikki was half as amazing as you said she is, she wouldn't have wanted you to join her, not yet. You have a purpose here, and a family. There are things here for you to live for now. You're not alone in the void anymore. You have us, and if the gods truly do smile on you, enough to bring you back from that place, then she could still be here somewhere, on Nirn, waiting for you.

Veda: *lip trembling, trying to hold back tears* Do you think so?

Kaidan: There's not a doubt in my mind.

[surelyyourejesting]

Hi I'm todd Howard and I need your help. We at bethesda would like yo port Skyrim to reality and if you gave us 5$ we could make this come true. DM me at thoward @bethsoft .com or give me a call at 301-354-4254 for discussion

I have something amazing to show you that demands your attention! I give you: Falmerblood elixir! Made from the one and only snow elves, mystical beings who live in legends and were masters of great magic. Imagine the power that coursed through their veins! My sources must remain a secret for their own protection but I can promise that the contents are genuine. One sip of the elixir and your wishes will be granted. Great wealth, everlasting life or perhaps limitless power could be yours! For only 20 septims! Don't wait! I only have a few left in stock.

[aethuviel]

“Are you thinking what I’m thinking?”

[t-oclafane]

[ziillosdiidu]

lads and lasses i give you, falmerblood elixir!

[not-your-lifeline]

Falmerblood Elixir, you say?

[tes-trash-blog]

Baseless Headcanon: Unlike his other scams, the Falmerblood Elixir Brynolf sells actually does contain Falmer blood. He had to dilute it at a 1:100 ratio to prevent some.. rather unpleasant side effects.

[actuallykiwi]

Once a Thief... Chapter 1: A Chance Arrangement

***DISCLAIMER: A part of this chapter (marked with *asterisks*) was originally written by @1000fiction, so credit goes to them! (i may have changed it just slightly though hehe). And all characters (except for mine, Cimber) belong to Skyrim made by Bethesda! 

Enjoy :) 

Cimber took a deep breath, the smell of lake water and rotting wood filling her nose. It had been years since she had been to Skyrim, and her first time this far into the Rift. She wondered if the rumors about Riften were true, about how corrupted it was, and the mysterious guild secretly ruling its streets. The stable and outer wall seemed normal enough. She adjusted her bag on her shoulder and wandered toward the gate. 

“Hold there. Before I let you into Riften, you need to pay the visitor’s tax,” one of the guards prodded. 

She stopped, tilting her head slightly. “Uh.. What’s the tax for?” 

“For the privilege of entering the city. What does it matter?” 

That was her hint right there. Cimber had been scammed enough times back home to know when someone was being dishonest about charging for something. She had gotten good at picking up the signs. “Are you seriously trying to shake me down?” She put a hand on her hip. 

“Alright, keep your voice down! You want everyone to hear you? I’ll let you in, just let me unlock the gate.” The guard shook his head and went to do so. 

“Thank you.” She rolled her eyes when his back was turned and smiled sweetly at him as she walked past. 

She sighed and stopped a few feet from the gate. Well, it wasn’t homely, but it was her new home. Probably. If she found a place to stay. She could see where the smell of rotting wood came from; this city was in dire need of some repairs. She gripped her bag and began to walk toward the center of the city.

Cimber decided to start heading towards the market, where it seemed most of the town milled about. A lot of pockets ripe for picking, she thought, but better to wait before I get too comfortable. Don’t want them hounding the new girl in town. 

From across the way, Brynjolf was proudly showing off his new scheme: “Falmerblood Elixir”. He knew with enough sweet-talking and grand gestures, these walking pockets would buy anything. Eventually. It was all about patience. Now if he could just find a new blood to help with his actual scheme... And it’s as if the gods answered his prayers. If he ever prayed. When he swiveled his head to the right, he had to do a double take. A young girl, perhaps just slightly younger than him, was taking in the city, clearly from out of town. No one from Riften was that clean and put-together. 

Or that pretty. 

 And besides, this girl just had the aura of a true thief around her, as innocently as she played it off. It was like something was pushing him to ask her. So with his mind set into “charming” mode, he did. 

Cimber supposed it wouldn’t be too bad here. As long as she kept her nose clean, found a way to earn a little more gold, and found a decent house, she could be alright here. She leaned on the railing that overlooked the canal beneath the streets, wondering what it used to be like as the bustling city she thought it’d be. She was lost in her thoughts when she hard a voice close behind her. “Never done an honest day’s work in your life for all that coin you’re carrying, eh lass?”

She did her best not to appear slightly startled, and kept her cool, innocent voice on. “I’m sorry, what?” She glanced to her side toward the stranger. 

“I’m saying you’ve got the coin, but you didn’t earn a septim of it honestly, I can tell.” Brynjolf said coolly, as if calling out a fellow thief was just a usual occurrence. 

“Heh, how could you possibly know that?” She chuckled and turned fully towards him, arms loosely crossed in case this guy was up to trouble. And she had the sneaking suspicion that he was. But she couldn’t turn away. 

Now it was Bryn’s turn to try to not appear startled. This girl’s eyes were a shocking shade of amber, as if her eyes were actually made of gold. He wondered how more of the town wasn’t paying her any mind. He cleared his throat. “It’s all about sizing up your mark, lass. The way they walk, what they’re wearing... it’s a dead giveaway.” 

Cimber didn’t think the tunic she had on, skirt tied into a belt of sorts around her waist, and trousers and boots really gave anything away. This guy was good. But now she was getting a bit defensive. “My wealth is none of your business.”  

“Oh, but that’s where you’re wrong, lass. Wealth is my business.” He looked around and leaned in a bit closer towards her. “...Maybe you’d like a taste?” He asked with a grin forming. 

She swore he almost had a purr in his voice. Oddly enough, something about his offer stuck out to her. She needed gold. How could she refuse? “...What did you have in mind?” 

“I’ve got a bit of an errand to perform, but I need an extra pair of hands. And in my line of work, extra hands are well paid.”

Now she was really interested. “What do I have to do?”

“Simple… I’m going to cause a distraction and you’re going to steal Madesi’s silver ring from a strongbox under his stand. Once you have it, I want you to place it in Brand-Shei’s pocket without him noticing.” 

“Why plant the ring on Brand-Shei?”

“There’s someone that wants to see him put out of business permanently. That’s all you need to know. Now, you tell me when you’re ready and we’ll get started.”

She thought about it for a moment. She was really hoping to avoid any kind of thieving, at least on her first day. And even then she was going to start small, but not a full-blown heist. Well, what the heck. “I’m ready. Let’s do this.”

 “Good. Wait until I start the distraction and then show me what you’re made of.” He smiled and nodded at her, walking back to his stand. She acted casual and walked around the market wall, appearing nonchalant as the show began.

“Everyone, everyone! Gather ‘round! I have something amazing to show you that demands your attention…” Go time. From the information he gave her, she assumed this Madesi was the jewelry vendor, so with the crowd distracted and herself out of sight of the guards, she got to work. She found the ring and left no trace of her presence behind, then casually but quickly made her way towards Brand-Shei’s stand. The elf was sitting in the perfect position, but the crowd was getting impatient. Time’s almost up. She quietly crawled behind the stand and slipped it neatly into his pocket, just in time. Cimber blended with the crowd as they began to disperse, even adding an agitated sigh for good measure.

“Well, I see that my time is up. Come back tomorrow if you wish to buy!”

***Brynjolf had kept the crowd busy, and so far not a single person had stirred and the guards had no reason to idle in the square. But where was she? He hadn’t seen her pass between Madesi’s stall. He was beginning to think she might’ve bailed. The crowd cleared, and the only person who lingered was the bright-eyed girl, wearing a triumphant, enchanting smirk on her face. 

“This is where you impress me, right?” He grinned back, hoping she would. 

Lo and behold, in a mere few moments, guards swarmed the market at Madesi’s cry of a robbery, the shock of Brand-Shei discovering his possession, and his imminent arrest. 

Brynjolf chuckled.This one was going places. ***

Next

[somechubbynerd]

FALMERBLOOD ELIXIR! The only one of its kind! now available for $34.99,

"Okay, but what does it DO?"

[forgottenbones]

Falmerblood Elixir

[spacetime-storytime]

Mjoll retires and opens a dairy business called "Mjoll's Mjölk"

Bryjolf: "come and get your genuine falmerblood elixir you'll love it i promise"

Mjoll, with a milk van: "mjölk"

Everyone: *queues up around mjoll*

the swedish for milk is mjölk and now i will not be able to look at mjoll the same again

bypassed milk drinker, she’s just milk

[thebanneredmareinn]

That whole room is a sex den lmao. The Falmerblood Elixir that Brynjolf claims will allow one to make love like a sabercat and Lusty Argonian Maid books on the side table, a few gold pieces under the bed, the cuffs on the headboard. There’s also a statue of Dibella, a few flowers, and a pot of honey on the dresser at the foot of the bed, as well as a few stamina potions. I think there’s even a horker tusk next to/under the bed.

I feel like maybe Todd is trying to live vicariously through Haelga lol

i went into haelga’s bedroom to see if i could steal shit and now i wanna die

excuse me todd? are you going to answer for modeling a kink bed todd?