#fadel loves bison like his own heart

[thekitsandthekats]

okay can we please dicuss this revelation please like i feel like im losing my mind. i don't know if the possibility of them not actually being brothers was discussed before but i didn't come across anything so when i saw this: I LOST MY SHIT

two pictures of two different couples (i think) so two sets of parents. bison and fadel might not be actual brothers. only brought together by Mother and her band of assassins. like this changes things for me because it makes fadels love for bison so so much more than what it was before. like because of the job, and his personality, he has every reason to not want anything to do with anyone. but at some point in his life he saw little bison, little bison who lost everything dear to him and he vowed to protect him, to claim him as his brother. like if this is true then just think of fadel and bison both finding their parents dead and having nowhere to go, no one to turn to but each other.

in both of these they seem to be alone, or the only child in the room, which makes me think they're not bio brothers but idk maybe it's angling, or its different parts of the same house but who knows. im going with my theory that they're not brothers but two lost boys completely dedicated to keeping the other safe. esp because bison says

MY parents. not OUR parents. and he's looking at both sets of photos so i think he's talking about the parental couples as seperate sets. one for fadel and one for him. like i need you to understand the implications here. fadel and bison have been through thick and thin together, doing jobs, causing crime, killing men, losing their parents, their families, TOGETHER. fadels protectiveness has reached all new levels for me and i am melting at the thought of it.

[bird-inacage]

The Heart Killers EP4: Kantbison as "Partners in Crime"

At this point in the story, Kant and Bison are effectively standing on opposite sides. Their whole side quest to punish Babe's bullies and teacher felt like foreshadowing - an example of how well these two can work together when they are on the same team. More importantly, how much their values align when in pursuit of the same objective.

A strict moral compass underlies Bison and Fadel's work. They only target 'the bad guys' - those who deserve what's coming to them. So it's deeply ingrained in Bison's psyche to fight for injustice. When he notices Babe's bruises, his brain immediately deduces foul play and is compelled to help Kant find the perpetrator, regardless of his own growing suspicions around Kant's integrity.

Kant doesn't mean to act with ill intent but is willing to do unethical things where necessary in order to achieve a goal. Spiking Bison's drink was a particularly dicey move. We know this is all in aid of protecting his brother but Bison doesn't. So when Kant declares, "I only cared about my brother at first, but my boyfriend's right. If I let you go, you're only going to do it to other children" it demonstrates that firstly, Kant supports the stance of doing the just thing, and secondly that he agrees with following Bison's example because they align in their values.

To Bison, seeing first-hand that they respect the same moral code, one that Kant is willing to put into action, earns his respect. "I might not trust you 100% but i have to admit... What you did today totally rocks." A man who is willing to expose a paedophile and save other potential victims, can't be all that bad can he? A man who has a conscience, who has deemed his own history of stealing cars as something he's not proud of, is not one of the 'bad guys' surely?

Now, why is this important? Well, once they have exposed their respective positions, acknowledging that they can actually work alongside each other will enable them to overcome this fact. They've established that precedence here. We're getting a glimpse into what could come after the fallout.

You can keep tabs on bird-inacage’s BL meta directory for my other long-form posts around The Heart Killers, which I’ll be updating in real time as the show airs.

[clairedaring]

Plot Spoilers of GMMTV 2024 - Part 2 Series

So GMMTV accidentally???? intentionally??? spoiled the detailed plots to most of their 2024 part 2 lineup series through their public pamphlet at the Busan International Film Festival. So I'm just making this post to compile them.

WARNING: MAJOR ENDING SPOILERS

YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK.

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okay enough warning. now you're on your own.

The Heart Killers

A cool tattooist who works as a spy for the police is assigned to investigate brutal gunman brothers, so he tries to flirt with the younger one to dig up their information. When his attempt is interfered with by the older brother, the tattooist has to find someone to get rid of him, someone to hit on the scary-looking gunman. He then enlists the help of his handsome friend to join in his mission to win the gunman brothers' hearts and start a new life with a clean slate.

This is a story about Kant (First Kanaphan), a handsome and talented tattooist who is part-time a police spy and part-time charming playboy. One day, he meets an attractive man at a bowling alley and has the best one-night stand of his life, only to wake up and find that the guy has disappeared without leaving him his number. All Kant can think about is that passionate night. Later, he gets assigned a new mission to Investigate two killers wanted by the police. Whether it's good or bad luck, one of them turns out to be his hot one-night stand. Kant doesn't want to do it, but the captain makes him an offer he can't say no- to clean up his criminal record of past car theft.

Kant does some research and learns that the two assassins live undercover as hamburger shop owners. He goes to have a meal there and sees Bison (Khaotung Thanawat), the man he has slept with that night. A spark happens between them and Kant starts making a move on Bison to find out who is behind everything. Even though Bison feels something for Kant, they face a big obstacle in the name of Fadel (Joong Archen), Bison's big brother who worries about his safety. Because Fadel doesn't want Bison to bond with anyone and he doesn't trust Kant, he tries to stop the two from getting together. Bison wants to start a relationship with Kant, so he suggests finding Fadel a partner to distract him, but the problem is, who would dare hit on Fadel? Kant thinks of his gorgeous and charming best friend named Style (Dunk Natachai) who is a real pain in the neck and not afraid of anything. Style is a car mechanic who has once rear-ended Fadel's car and gotten into a fight with him. Kant promises Style his car that the latter has eyes on if he can win Fadel's heart. Style says yes to the deal and begins pursuing Fadel immediately with the knowledge of Fadel's daily routines that Kant receives from Bison and forwards to him. Style persistently chases after Fadel, doing everything he can to insert himself into his life. Fadel is annoyed but secretly likes that Style is not afraid of him like the others.

While his fake relationship is going well, Kant has to finish his mission of spying on the killers. He discovers that the mastermind is Madam Lily, mother of Fadel and Bison who has adopted the two from an orphanage and trained them to be killers. Later when the two brothers make mistakes in their mission and cause some information to leak out, Bison starts doubting Kant and finds out that he's a police spy. Bison tells Fadel what he learns and the big brother is furious because he has fallen in love with Style. Bison himself also feels so angry and betrayed that he takes Kant away to kill him. Meanwhile, Fadel has to search for his younger brother as both of them are being hunted by Keen (Pepper Phanuroj), Madam Lily's other adopted child who has been jealous that the two get big assignments. Now he gets an order to kill them because they have screwed up. Fadel threatens Style to follow him and help him look for Bison. The two run for their lives and get closer, feeling both love and hatred for each other. In the end, Bison can't bring himself to kill Kant so he lets him go. However, Kant has real feelings for Bison so he refuses to leave and wants to help him get a normal life. When Fadel and Style find Bison and Kant, they tell them the truth about Madam Lily. The two brothers want revenge, but Kant and Style don't want them to kill anyone anymore, worrying something bad might happen to them. Kant and Style propose that the four of them steal Madam Lily's money and run away together. They kickstart the stealing plan by having Kant and Style enter an event by disguising themselves as waiters and escorts. They find their way to Madam Lily, catch her, demand her to open her safe, and then take something important from her. The whole gang manages to steal big cash and runs away together without killing a single soul.

Ultimately, Kant fails to clear his criminal record but he doesn't care anymore. Now he shares a new dream with Bison. The two run away to another country together while Fadel and Style decide to stay and continue running the restaurant. They're not afraid of the big boss' influence because they have taken records of Madam Lily's illegal activities to ensure that they will be able to live a normal life without anyone bothering them ever again.

Ossan's Love Thailand

The messy love story begins when Heng, a bachelor working in a real estate company whose love life is as hopeless as his work life, stumbles upon his own photos on the phone and computer of branch manager Kongdech, aka his boss. Heng certainly finds this behavior strange, and all the stranger considering that his boss has been married for 30 years.

Meanwhile, Kongdech's daughter has been trying to set her single father up for a match for years after her mother died. She finds out that her father might be in love with someone, and a little investigation leads her to believe that it is someone from the company. She then asks Heng to help her find out who the lucky girl is, only to learn that it is Heng himself who has stolen her father's heart! She is definitely taken aback at first, but after gaining her composure, she puts her whole heart into rooting for her father and hoping for the best for his new love.

When Kongdech finally confesses his love, it sends shock through Heng's world who has never liked men before, and it doesn't help either that this confession comes from none other than his amazing boss. As if things aren't confusing enough as it is, his new colleague and roommate, Mo, also falls in love with him. Heng finds himself in a messy situation, with two men fighting to win his heart. But after living together under the same roof, proximity makes him choose Mo and decides to live together as lovers.

The two men start dating, and all the while Mo realizes that Heng has never had a lover before, let alone a male one at that. But while things are looking up, Chicha, Heng's female childhood friend, confesses her love to him. Mo, who happens to hear the conversation, resolves to himself that maybe Heng actually wants to date women and have the perfect family he has always dreamed of, Mo decides to break up with him and leaves the house, ending their relationship. But instead of a new girlfriend, Heng finds comfort in none other than Kongdech, his own boss, who has slowly taken Mo's place at home, never letting Heng lift a finger around the house. They may be dating now, but Kongdech knows deep down that Heng still has feelings for Mo. On the eve of their wedding, Kongdech finally makes Heng realize just whom his heart actually belongs to. Heng leaves the wedding immediately, running to find Mo who he truly falls for.

Us The Series

Dokrak is an 18-year-old who decides to take a gap year after finishing high school to find herself. She has a part-time job at a coworking space coffee shop called "Cuf & Co." It's here that she crosses paths with Pam, a 22-year-old dentistry student, who is a regular at this cafe to hit the books. Dokrak gets to know Pam and develops a secret crush on her, until Kawee, her 24-year-old biological brother and a medical student, meets Pam by chance and falls for her at first sight. Kawee turns to Dokrak, asking her to play matchmaker. Because Dokrak really loves her brother and wants to see him happy, she agrees to help. Dokrak begins the mission of helping her brother to hit on a beautiful woman like Pam. She coaches him on wooing Pam with different techniques, including taking care of her, flirting with romantic words, and writing a love letter, but as time passes, she finds herself unable to ignore her growing feelings for Pam because of their intimacy. Even Dokrak realizes it, she has already fallen for Pam. Eventually, Pam agrees to date Kawee, so Dokrak must keep her feelings hidden, knowing she can't fall for her "brother's girlfriend."

But as Pam and Kawee's relationship progresses, they encounter challenges due to Pam's reluctance to engage in physical intimacy, such as touching, kissing, and making love. This is stemming from her past trauma as her high school ex-boyfriend once harassed her. This trauma is the reason Pam doesn't like physical touch. One day, Pam discovers that Kawee sleeps with another woman. In the end, Dokrak advises her to break up with Kawee.

Kawee explains that it's just physical cheating, which results from Pam refusing physical intimacy with him. Despite his insistence that Pam is the only one he loves, Pam is deeply disappointed in him. Pam turns to Dokrak for some advice, asking how she should handle it and whether she should give Kawee another chance. On the one hand, Dokrak doesn't want Pam to break up with her brother, but, on the other hand, she feels a good person like Pam deserves better.

Dokrak regrets giving her that advice because after Pam asks for a break up, she disappears from both Kawee and Dorrak's lives. Kawee feels really heartbroken, remaining unable to move on and desperately wanting Pam back. Meanwhile, Dokrak misses Pam, her favorite sister, a lot, hoping for a future reunion with her one day.

After several months, Pam reappears at Cuf & Co, providing Dokrak an opportunity to reconnect after having lost touch for so long. They become close again as Pam generously offers to tutor Dokrak, who plans to take a university entrance exam the following year. Meanwhile, Eak, the 27- year-old owner of Cuf & Co, who has had a crush on Pam all along, notices a close relationship between Dokrak and Pam, so he asks her to act as a matchmaker between him and Pam. Simultaneously, Peem, a 23-year-old barista known for his kindness and good looks, confesses his feelings to Dokrak.

Dokrak and Pam both have feelings for each other, but Dokrak chooses to keep them hidden because she doesn't dare to and is, deep inside, burdened by guilt over his brother's situation. Meanwhile, Pam is confused about her actual feelings for Dokrak. In the midst of her confusion, Pam decides to embark on a relationship with a tomboy named Oat, who is about the same age, hoping to clarify her feelings towards women. However, Pam eventually realizes that she has no feelings for Oat, but her affections lie solely with...Dokrak.

Acknowledging her feelings, Pam straightforwardly confesses to Dokrak, leading them to start a romantic relationship together. Pam and Dokrak both enjoy a period of happiness until Kawee discovers their relationship. Kawee seems very hurt and disappointed. Stricken with guilt and remorse for causing her brother pain, Dokrak decides to end her relationship with Pam.

Following Dokrak's decision to end their relationship, Pam disappears from her life again, leaving Dokrak seriously in pain. Witnessing his sister in misery, Kawee is filled with guilt, recognizing he's the one causing her sorrow. Eventually, Kawee manages to get over Pam. He urges Dokrak to follow what her heart desires, telling her that he supports her love because he wants his sister to be happy with the person she loves. Dokrak tries her best to win Pam's heart again, and, finally, their love is fulfilled. Pam and Dokrak now have courage to love each other.

Perfect 10 Liners

The chaotic university saga kicks off as Arm (Book Kasidet) realizes his lifelong dream of being accepted into the Faculty of Engineering. However, his moment of triumph is quickly overshadowed by mayhem. As part of a customary ritual, first-year students draw lots to determine their higher-year peer mentors. By a stroke of fate, Arm lands himself into the exclusive circle of the 'Divine Peers,' a group comprising extraordinary students from various years, with Yeepun, a captivating female student, as his second-year peer mentor. To further complicate matters, Yeepun entrusts him with the formidable task of managing the Engineer Cute Boy page, a widely popular online platform.

Despite his reluctance, Arm performs admirably as the page administrator. In response to many fans' requests, he uploads a photo of 'Ark' (Force Jiratchapong), a third-year Civil Engineering student, unaware of the prohibition against doing so, as Ark vehemently objects to such actions. Not knowing the admin's identity, Ark sends a harsh message demanding the photo be deleted. Arm immediately detests Ark's rudeness and develops a dislike for the man. Little does he know, Ark is one of the 'Divine Peers, and to make matters worse, his third-year peer mentor. Despite his reservations, Arm finds himself occasionally Interacting with Ark, not only because of their mentorship but also because many people seek Arm's assistance to connect with the blunt and private Ark.

What Arm does not know is that he is in Ark's inner circle because Ark wants him to. Ark, smitten with Arm at first sight, secretly cares for him and endeavors to better himself to become a suitable match for Arm. Despite his typically hot-headed nature and penchant for risk-taking, Ark restrains himself out of fear of endangering Arm. Meanwhile, Arm remains oblivious to Ark's feelings, Amidst the chaos and many headaches, Arm gradually begins to understand his own heart. Before they realize it, their relationship evolves from peer mentor and peer mentee to boyfriends.

On the first day of university life, disaster strikes hard for Gun (Chimon Wachirawit (t/n: Chimon has now been replaced with Santa Pongsapak). As hapless as he is, Gun accidentally breaks a bathroom faucet and finds himself soaked like a puppy. With a stroke of luck, one classmate comes to his rescue. However, amidst the chaos, Gun is too preoccupied to get a good look at the person's face, only catching a glimpse of their shoes. As he tries to navigate his new surroundings and classmates, Gun is determined to find the one who saved him from the bathroom mishap. Eventually, he tracks down Faifa (Junior Panachai) and expresses his gratitude, unaware that Faifa knows nothing of the incident. As they get to know each other, Gun realizes that it was actually Yotha (Perth Tanapon), Faifa's older Irish twin, who wears identical shoes, that he should be thanking. Despite being siblings, their personalities couldn't be more different. Faifa is friendly and approachable, while Yotha exudes an air of mystery, as if harboring secrets.

Gun suffers from a health issue: he can't sleep in darkness due to an unfortunate childhood incident. This becomes problematic when he shares an on-campus dorm with a roommate who can't tolerate sleeping with the lights on. Yotha, however, has no such issue and offers to switch places with Gun's roommate, as he rarely returns to the dorm at night. Yotha keeps his promise, disappearing after dark and returning in the morning. Gun is suspicious of Yotha's nocturnal activities; rumors swirl, suggesting he's mingling with girls or involved in illicit activities. Gun attempts to confront Yotha about it, but Yotha always avoids the subject.

Yotha is fearful of love, disappointment, and loss. He does not want to lose his mother, as he did with his father. He does not want to be abandoned as his ex-lover did to him. He does not want to see anyone betrayed by their love. So he chooses to become a third wheel in people's relationships, encouraging one party to cheat in the hopes that his actions help the person being cheated on recognize the truth sooner. He frequently gets into disputes and is beaten up by the boyfriends of the girls he charms.

As Gun and Yotha grow closer, they gradually learn more about each other. Yet, when Yotha realizes he's on the brink of falling in love, fear of loss resurfaces, prompting him to withdraw. However, with time, Yotha learns that love isn't always cruel, and Gunyukol is a risk worth taking again.

Wine (Mark Jiruntanin) becomes the latest member of the 'Divine Peers' through the lucky draw. Yotha, Wine's second-year peer mentor, is preoccupied with his boyfriend, leaving him with little time for his mentee. Stepping in, Faifa (Junior Panachai), a remarkably friendly second-year student, takes over the role and looks after his older brother's mentee.

Faifa learns that Wine recently ended his relationship with Toey, his girlfriend from before university, after developing feelings for Tor, Toey's older brother. To avoid further guilt towards Toey, Wine opted for an amicable breakup. Now with Tor's recent coming out as a man attracted to men, Wine feels hopeful but unsure about approaching him. Faifa offers his assistance, volunteering to serve as Wine's practice ground, allowing Wine to hone his approach before making a move on Tor.

From their close interaction, feelings unexpectedly blossom. Faifa finds himself genuinely falling for Wine but hesitates to reveal the emotions, fearing it might disrupt his role as Wine's coach in pursuing Tor. Meanwhile, Wine also develops affection for Faifa, though Faifa's naturally over-friendly demeanor leaves him uncertain about his own significance to Faifa.

Faifa nearly loses Wine before they both muster the courage to confess their feelings. In a bold move, Faifa, who has never been truly committed to anyone, changes his approach for Wine, abandoning his flirtatious ways and prioritizing Wine above all else. In turn, Wine becomes Faifa's singular focus, capturing Faifa's heart like no one else ever has.

Sweet Tooth, Good Dentist

Sont is a marketing student who has been single for far too long. One day, per the recommendation of his student mentor, Sont goes on a date with Jamie or Jay, an older dentistry student. But no matter how impressed Sont is by their first meeting, he can't bring himself to like some aspect of Jay's personality, especially his tendency to be a little bit narcissistic. Sont decides to not take this relationship further, and the two have been apart ever since.

Two years later, Sont is now studying in his third year and working his butt off to make his TikTok account go viral. "Sleepy Eater, Hungry Sleeper" is a two-year-old channel of his with barely more than 600 followers. His main content is food ASMR that stems from his love of desserts and snacks. Whatever dessert it is he's eating in the stream, Sont will gulp it down within minutes. He even gets snacks from his sponsors sometimes.

One day, while Sont is streaming, his toothache gets so bad that he has to stop. His best friend/roomate like Guck then has to urge him to see a dentist since this isn't the first time it happens, and not likely the last. Pestered by the pain in his tooth, Sont finally has to go to a dentist, and finds out that his mouth is no better than a dental battlefield that needs teeth cleaning, filling, and even some root canal treatment that would cost him quite a fortune. Being nearly broke as he is, Sont clearly can't afford it. That's when his dentist recommends being a case study patient for dentistry students, where they treat his dental problems for free.

The next month, Sont has become a complete case for Dr. Ming, a fifth year dentistry student. This brings him face- to-face with Ming's assistant dentist, Jay, who Sont hasn't seen since their last date. The two years have changed Jay in some ways, but Sont notices that his narcissistic tendency remains intact. Sont thinks he will never see Jay again after the treatment, but as fate would have it, Jay's family happens to own the building Sont lives in, and since the convenience store downstairs is short-staffed, Jay is now filling in as a part-timer. Now every time Sont wants to buy the snacks he craves, he has a dentist-in- training stopping him from ruining his teeth further. Jay truly is the destroyer of joy to Sont now.

Even though he's making some money from his ASMR channel, it still isn't enough to make ends meet. Sont decides to get a job at Craft Cake where he meets his new boss, Captain, an old friend of Jay who has quit his job and opened his own business. Sont has come at the right time and helped the business gain some recognition. All this while, Sont keeps running into his boss' friends like Ming and Jay who somehow always show up at the place much more often than Sont would like.

What amazes Sont is that, the more he gets to spend time with Jay, the more he sees who Jay really is. Now someone he once discarded has taken a special place in his heart. Even the narcissistic tendency now seems like a cute and silly streak. Meanwhile, Jay seems to be very private with his feelings to Sont, unlike Captain, who has been more and more obvious that he's into Sont. And as Sont moves closer to Captain, a part of him wonders if Jay still has feelings for him like two years before. He doesn't want to risk what they have now by asking, and in the end just waits for someone to be the braver person and finally asks if what they are is more than just friends.

The Ex-Morning

Pathaphee or Phee is a famous news anchor of Good Day Thailand. He is a rising star in journalism. With his bright and lively personality, he is beloved by the public. But his life turns upside down when the video of his abusive behaviors towards his co-anchor is leaked to the public. His co-anchor is injured in the incident. From a rising star, he turns into a falling star.

Pathaphee is suspended from work. He has to sell his luxurious car. He tries to get a job at other news agencies but no one wants to work with him. Due to a trauma, he has a panic attack and is unable to do a live news report from the field. Luckily, he still has Young, an exclusive news editor who has adored and been close with him since he was an intern. Young gives Pathaphee a chance to work with a talented producer who holds an overseas degree on a new show. Pathaphee feels blessed for the second chance that he gets. He is relieved that at least a good thing comes out of this turmoil. But as soon as he meets the producer, he is not sure if this chance is really a blessing. The producer is Tamtawan, his ex-boyfriend. Their breakup was so terrible that Pathaphee developed an anxiety disorder after that. He still suffers from it even now. He knows that the person who is supposed to be his savior can end his career for good.

Pathaphee and Tamtawan were dating when they were in college. Tamtawan was his senior at the faculty of journalism. They were competing in everything they did. However, they had a promise that Tamtawan would support Pathaphee's dream to be a news reporter. On the day that Pathaphee had an audition for a news reporter position at a major news agency. In the audition, he needed to give a live field report and the judges would watch it. While he was reporting news, Tamtawan's breakup message was among the keywords for the news report that the creative sent him. Moreover, his news reporting was interrupted by a group of local mafia. His news reporting ended in a disaster. He was eliminated.

Pathaphee wanted to know the reason why Tamtawan broke up with him. But the truth he found out that he stole his critique of journalism and used it to apply for a scholarship at an overseas university. He was accepted to the university because of his work. He decided to dump him.

Pathaphee worked hard and achieved his dream of being a news reporter. He loathes Tamtawan more than anything in this world. But now he is so desperate that he has no other choice but to work with Tamtawan under one condition. Tamtawan needs to help him regain his followers. He must have ten million followers in the next three months. If he fails, he needs to resign from the news agency. If he refuses his offer, he will expose that he stole his work which helped him get his scholarship.

Tamtawan dislikes Pathaphee but he thinks his offer is challenging and interesting. He accepts his offer but he also has a condition. If he successfully helps him regain his followers, he needs to apologize to him and call him "Master" for three months.

Pathaphee and Tamtawan work together as a news reporter and a producer. Their past has a major influence on the dynamic of their current relationship. Though they always a way to tease each other, flirting can also be seen between them. As they are chasing the truth, they become close. Physical touches, that accidentally occur while they are working together, reignite the spark between them. Their relationship is like unpredictable weather. It's confusing but also intriguing.

Tamtawan does not come back for his work. He has a hidden mission to help the man he cares for. He comes back to find the mafia who exposed the video that destroyed Pathaphee's reputation and put his life in danger. The ex-lovers need to work together to find the real criminal behind their case and their true feelings for each other. Will the flame in their hearts change them? Will they learn about the change together?

Revamp: The Undead Story

Punn (Prem Warut), a 24-year-old antique shop owner, is enlisted by his gallery-owning friend to restore a painting vandalized under mysterious circumstances one night. During the restoration process, Punn accidentally injures himself on a shard of mirror, inadvertently staining the artwork with his blood. This act awakens Ramil (Boun Noppanut), the last descendant of a vampire lineage, trapped within the painting for over a century. However, Ramil emerges powerless and becomes the target of relentless pursuit by the "Hunters." Tasked with aiding Ramil in reclaiming his lost powers, Punn embarks on a journey to locate Ramil's former servants, now living discreetly among humans. As they collaborate, a deep bond forms between Punn and Ramil, blossoming into love and trust. Yet, their relationship is tested when Ramil's enigmatic past becomes intertwined with Punn's own mysterious background, seemingly orchestrated by an external force. Together, they confront their doubts and fears, striving to overcome adversities before reaching their ultimate destinies.

Thame - Po (เธม-โป้) HEART THAT SKIPS A BEAT

In need of a job, 'Po' finds himself accepting an offer to make a documentary about a boy band "Mars" to make ends meet. Only he doesn't know he's not making a documentary about their success, but their disbanding, due to the leader of the band 'Thame' on the verge of signing a new contract in South Korea.

Filming Mars makes Po realize that, even with all the internal conflicts, Thame never wants to leave. And the only way to save this band is for Po to smooth out any misunderstandings between the members and Thame.

This mission to make all five members of Mars stay together has now become the backdrop of the beginning of love between Thame and Po. And Po will have to realize that dating an idol is no child play at all!

Hide & Sis

Chatfah, the youngest sister of the Buppajinda family, has just received the most share of the inheritance from her father and is about to get married. Unfortunately, Chatfah falls from the highest floor of a vacation home to her three older sisters' shocked eyes before her body disappears. The three sisters namely Baibua, Chompoo, and Picha become suspects in Chatfah's disappearance.

Baibua Boontharika is the eldest sister who is composed, wise, and has always sacrificed for her family. Chompoo Chompoonuch, the second sister, is a beautiful and confident model whose boyfriend Chatfah has stolen to get married to. The third sister, Putpichaya is a jewelry designer who is the closest to Chatfah. The three girls try to find Chatfah while a lot of mysterious things happen after their youngest sister goes missing. Putpichaya gets so violently ambushed that she almost dies. Chompoonuch falls from grace due to a rumor that she has killed her sister out of anger after she has stolen her lover to marry him. Boontharika struggles with managing her company because of the gossip and accusation that the flowers there have a curse of death!

When no one else can be trusted, the three sisters must try to trust each other. They move back to live in Buppajinda Mansion like in their childhood days to find out who is behind Chatfah's disappearance, which could very well be one of them. But what's waiting for them at the mysterious mansion is not only the truth about Chatfah's disappearance but also stories that have been hidden since the past - the rift between siblings caused by dishonesty and deceit in their parents' generation leading the girls to turn enemies and hurt each other. Eventually, the three girls discover the truth of more than one real culprit in the Buppajinda Mansion. The red color of the flowers is then no longer the color of blood, death, or curse.

Leap Day

Legend has it that male infants who are born at noon and at midnight on February 29 of a leap are destined to bring misfortune upon each other.

On February 29, 2000, at 00.00 AM, a baby boy called Midnight comes into the world, losing his mother due to a hemorrhage. This similar incident occurs again at 12.00 PM on the same day when another baby boy called Day is born.

Four years later, Day unexpectedly loses his dad in an accident, while Night's dad passes away because of cancer. Since then, their lives encounter recurring losses every four years. These losses take different forms, ranging from one losing the relative, whom he has taken care of as a result of a major car crash on the highway to the other losing the person who has taken care of him after being caught in the crossfire in the frightening shooting rampage, and so on. Every loss they endure occurs on February 29!!

Those around them start to feel scared and try to push Day and Night away because they don't want to be victims of the supposed curse. Night and Day grow up in isolation without bonding with or loving anyone until Night meets Dream, the girl who steps into his life and brings light into it. Dream turns into the only happiness he has in life.

Meanwhile, Day finds himself suddenly tasked with caring for Ozone, an autistic boy, who is the son of his elder sister, a distant relative of his. She dies in a tour bus overturned accident. At first, Ozone doesn't approve of him and doesn't open up to him because he believes Day is the reason for his mom's death. However, with effort and dedication in taking care of him, Ozone finally accepts him and starts to bond. At the same time, the relationship between Night and Dream keeps growing stronger.

As their 20th birthdays approach, both Day and Night fear of losing their loved ones. Night tries to break up with Dream, but she refuses to, while Day follows Ozone everywhere. Finally, their birthdays arrive. Ozone feels uncomfortable because Day keeps following him everywhere, so he tries to run away, crossing the road while Dream and Night's car is rushing in fast. Dream still doesn't understand why Night wants to break up with her. They are busily arguing, so they fail to notice Ozone. It's too late when they see him. Ozone is hit by their car and is so severely injured that he falls to the ground. The car then crashes into an electric post. Dream immediately passes out. Their injuries are both so severe that it seems they won't survive, but that year, it turns out they are safe. Nobody dies.

Friendshit Forever

"You're like a sister to me. You're my best friend," is what Baikhao says to Tulip not long after they first met, before both of their worlds turn upside down.

Tulip and Baikhao are supposed to be the best of friends. Their friendship looks beautiful from afar, but up close, it's ridden with envy and the tight grip of past grudges that won't let them go.

Parents make mistakes just like any other human being. It is only too bad that children must inherit those sins.

Baikhao befriends Tulip with the intention to take revenge for what Tulip's father did to her. She won't stop until justice is served for her father who killed himself and her mother who went insane after losing her younger sibling in a miscarriage. And for this sole purpose, Tulip will be used as a tool to destroy her own family.

Baikhao has help in the form of high school friend Tao, who has had a crush on her all these years and will do anything for her, including killing.

While Tulip has Namo, a classmate in the same major she mistakes for being gay, but is actually in love with her. Namo sticks around to protect her from harm. He may not be a match for her in terms of social standing, but whatever concerns Tulip, Namo is willing to put his life on the line for, and he must save Tulip from Baikhao's vile plan.

But revenge never ends well, if not straight up tragic, especially between two "best friends."

The Dark Dice

Samut, a senior in high school, is an academic achiever. He is a representative of his school competing in academic contests. But his bright future vanishes after he is involved in an altercation. He is expelled from school. He is transferred to a new school. Because of the trauma, he loses his passion for school.

Samut finds an ancient dice which brings him and seven other students into a mysterious board game. The eight students are competing, outsmarting, and backstabbing each other to stay alive in this mysterious game. Their lives are at stake. The only way to get out of the game is by defeating other contestants.

Break Up Service

Boss is a man who is destined to ruin other people's relationships. He works for Break-Up Service, a company that helps people break up with their partners. Boss meets Juet, a penniless woman who comes to apply for a job at his company. She is assigned to be his work partner. Boss prefers to go solo when he works. He keeps picking on Juet in hopes that she will resign. No matter how Boss tries to provoke her, she endures them all. She proves her worth again and again by successfully completing her tasks to break up couples.

The rookie and the veteran are working together to destroy other people's romance. Before Boss realizes, he has fallen in love with his partner.

Scarlet Heart Thailand

Nabun is a hair stylist who's on her luck slump. She's just lost her job, her life is ruined and her boyfriend cheated on her. Nabun needed an escape to Chiangmai to put her heart back together. While in the hot spring, Nabun has an intrusive thought that life can't simply be altered. Suddenly, Nabun drowns in the hot spring. After struggling against death, saved by miracle or destiny, Nabun rises in the middle of a private hot spring with naked princes who are enjoying their hot spring as well. The princes jolt to find a strange woman popping up from the hot spring. Nabun runs for her life and is shocked to find herself in the body of Chao Laila, a sickly young lady of Chiang Rung, a mysterious Lanna Kingdom dating back 300 years ago.

Nabun in Princess Laila's body has to adapt to survive in the ancient regime days. She finds herself struggling both in survival and love. Nabun meets Chao Saen Thep, her sister's fiance. Chao Saen Thep is kind to Nabun which is the opposite of Chao Mueang Fah who's stern. Nabun also meets Chao Chai Kaew, Chao Kong Thai, Chao Chom Harn, and Chao Fah Kram who all find Nabun mesmerizing as she dares think and speak differently from the other girls. Nabun brings new colors to Chiang Rung.

In the regime's grand ceremony, the crown prince is the target of assassination but Chao Mueang Fah plots a switch up and gets himself hurt as a result. Chao Mueang Fah investigates the case and finds that his mother and older brother are part of the assassination plot as Chao Chai Kaew has been aiming for the crown prince post. Naboon knows that Chao Mueang Fah is the parasite of the family as his hair has turned white ever since he was young. Everyone despises Chao Mueang Fah except Chao Hong Kham, the beautiful princess who secretly has a crush on Chao Mueang Fah but never dares reveal her heart.

Nabun becomes the center of attention of all the princes. Chao Saen Thep falls for Nabun even when he has a fiance. Chao Mueang Fah knows that Chao Saen Thep will bring troubles for Nabun so Chao Mueang Fah challenges his sibling for a boxing match to announce that Princess Laila is his. Nabun argues that she has her own life, this is because she doesn't know that Chao Mueang Fah is trying to protest her from getting bullied by Chao Hong Kham. Chao Mueang Fah is hoping to pull Nabun out of Chao Saen Thep's forbidden love.

Naboon owes her life to Chao Mueang Fah, has Chao Saen Thep as the owner of her heart, Chao Kong Thai as her advisor, Chao Chom Harn as a brother who can risk his life for her, and Chao Fah Kram as her best friend. Nabun is secretly rooting for Bua Sai, a royal dancer to win over Chao Fah Kram's heart. Chao Fah Kram whose love cuts the social hierarchy has to hide his relationship as Bua Sai could die if anyone finds out. The war of love situates itself amid the war of power. In the oath-giving ceremony, the king is poisoned and Nabun is held into custody as she works in the food preparation part for the king. Chao Saen Thep investigates and finds out that this is a conspiracy between Chao Hong Kham and Maha Dhevi (the queen). Nabun is sentenced to death while Chao Mueang Fah is trying to confirm her innocence and help Nabun out in all the ways he can. Chao Saen Thep decides to keep quiet instead of fighting for the one he loves. Nabun slips out of death when someone decides to give themselves in. Chao Mueang Fah takes Nabun to a house on the mountain to escape the chaos. Nabun gets closer to Chao Mueang Fah and realizes that behind his stern exterior is love and unconditional care.

In the ceremony to beg the gods for rain, everyone is surprised to find the black-haired Chao Mueng Fah as the one who conducts the ceremony until the rain comes. No one knows that Nabun helps Chao Mueng Fah to achieve slick black hair as well as calculate the date and time rain would come. Chao Mueng Fah becomes a rival that Chao Chai Kaew deems to get rid of regardless that he's his family. Chao Saen Thep is also hiding the rivalry against Chao Mueng Fah under the cover of a good guy. Chao Mueang Fah is sent on a diplomatic mission at Wiang Merng Marng to have Chao Pha Wiang, a cousin, kill him.

Chao Chai Kaew stirs up a rebellion but Chao Mueang Fah stops him. Chao Meung Fah stabs his brother and Chao Chai Kaew falls off the cliff. Not long after Chao Yod Lah steps up as a king, Chao Chai Kaew is not dead yet and he comes back for the throne. Chao Chai Kaew takes Nabun as hostage which forces Chao Mueang Fah to give in to save his lover's life. He reluctantly accepts when his brother steps up as the next king.

Nabun has a nightmare of Chao Mueng Fah killing Chao Kong Thai. She fears that there will be a blood bath among siblings. The king, Chai Kaew fears being dethroned to the extent that he goes crazy. He orders to have Nam Nang, a daughter of an army leader and the lover of Chao Kong Thai killed. Chao Kong Thai begs Chao Mueang Fe to kill him for he wants to die with his wife. Chao Mueang Fah has to kill his younger brother in tears. Nabun is shocked to see Chao Mueng Fah's body soaked with blood just like in her nightmare and there are lots of people who have to die because of him.

Chao Chai Kaew, as the king, rules the regime with terror to the extent that he is drugged to death in front of Chao Mueang Fah. Chao Mueang Fah ascends to the throne as the king and Nabun is the only person who knows this secret. Chao Mueang Fah speeds up his marriage with Nabun which gives Chao Saen Thep an excuse to get in the way. He holds it against them that it is against the royal family's conduct as Chao Laila does not hold the direct royal bloodline. Chao Saen Thep appoints Chao Hong Kham as the queen instead.

Chao Chom Harn couldn't stand seeing Nabun being devastated so he shows the paper from the previous king which states that he is allowed to marry Chao Laila. Chao Mueang Fah refuses to let Chao Chom Harn take Nabun away from the royal palace but Chao Chom Harn uses his power as the army leader to hide Nabun far away from King Mueang Fah.

Chao Fah Kram decides the give up his posts to live a simple life with his true love, Bua Sai. Nabun gets sick from Chao Laila's existing chronic illness, she's waiting for Chao Mueang Fah with depleting breaths. Chao Mueang Fah appears in front of her and Nabun wonders "Is this the truth... or a dream?". Nabun passes away in the arms of the man she loves with all her life. The sound of Chao Mueang Fah crying echoes in her mind.

In Chiangmai, Nabun miraculously wakes up. She became a famous influencer from her content about the Chiang Rung regime in an exhibition called "Chiang Rung, a mysterious regime waiting to be discovered". Nabun's heart beats fast when her eyes meet with a royal family descendant who's the owner of the exhibition, Mueang Fah, who's wearing a suit. He pulls Nabun in for a kiss and asks her, "Do you remember? You once said that lives can't be changed that simply except for dying and being rebom." Nabun hugs Mueang Fah and she realizes that everything isn't a dream but the destiny's twist of fate, one where they are ready to hold hands and embark on it together once again and forever.

[secriden]

This line. God, this line! It has been eating me up inside for 2 days now, because let's not forget, this line isn't about love, it's about trust. And that has implications that make me want to scream.

It's a direct reference to this moment earlier in the episode:

At the start of this discussion, Style and Fadel still have a kind of playful air about their conversation:

Style: Oh? Not even me? Fadel: You're at 80% at best. I feel like you're hiding something from me in the 20%.

In this exchange, though, there's a sense that Fadel is issuing a challenge, like there's something specific which Style can do to gain Fadel's full trust. And while Style knows there are things he cannot (yet) reveal to Fadel, I think a part of him is determined to be as honest as he can be, which is why he issues a challenge of his own by asking for more specificity:

Style: What do I have to do to gain your complete trust?

Part of this question is a simultaneously inquisitive and deflective - What (and why) do you think I'm hiding (something) from you? - but there's also a moment after Style finishes speaking where he stills and goes quiet that feels... genuine, weighty. Or, as @airenyah has pointed out in her meta on Style in episode 4, the "grounded[ness]" in Style's demeanour is a signal that Style means what he's saying in the moment. Maybe about his own desire to be worthy of Fadel's trust, maybe about how he genuinely does want this relationship to be real in whatever way that matters to Fadel.

I think Fadel sensed that too, because the moment looses all the lightheartedness it had before. Fadel pauses, and then gets a look on his face that just... breaks my heart. There's a sombreness there, like he knows he's going to have to say something that makes him sad. Fadel looks away, and then down, before he seems to steel himself and says:

Fadel: It'll never happen. No matter how much you love someone, I just don't believe that you can completely lay yourself bare in front of them.

Fadel says this like it's fact. Like what he's expressing is something foundational and true and irrefutable. It's not even about his doubt in Style's honesty, because this statement has no qualifiers or conditions put on it to connect it to Style. Rather this is what Fadel fundamentally believes about relationships and trust: he finds the very concept of being fully known and still accepted an impossibility.

Sure, maybe this is because of the falling out (or betrayal or disappearance) associated with the former lover; but I also think it might be because Fadel is acutely aware not only that he's hiding a rather big and dark secret (not to mince words, but: actual literal premeditated murder), but also about what it implies about Fadel. Because being able to kill another human, coldly and clinically and without remorse, takes a certain type of person. Because, yes, Fadel has lived through an absolutely harrowing and traumatising event (his parents' murder), but it's also undeniable that it changed him. Because there's something about Fadel that twisted dark and which he never quite got back. There's an anger, a hurt that colours every moment of his life; that enables him to look a man in the eyes, smile politely, and pull a trigger.

And at this point in their relationship, Fadel's understanding of Style is that he's... well, kind of innocent. Especially in comparison to Fadel and Bison, and even Kant.

Style, who easily reveals facts about his life which Fadel already knows (winning a car tuning competition), making Fadel doubt his own instincts about Style hiding secrets. Style, who also reveals the things Fadel doesn't know, like the tender and secret pain of a mother lost to cancer (which, now that I think about it, Fadel may also know) and his worries about a father who "lost his bearings for a bit" (which he probably doesn't). Style, who tries to comfort Fadel in his own loss by offering a safe space and a sympathetic ear.

Style, who doesn't just see Fadel for his tragedy, but is asking to be given the chance to accept all of Fadel as a person. Style, who not only wants but has the capacity, to be the only person Fadel needs to rely on. Style who, despite the sea of differences between them, understands Fadel on a level that is so very foundational.

I'm going to slightly segue and mention something that may not resonate with everyone, but really hit me in the gut this episode: because I lost my father when I was 16 after he battled cancer for 2 painful years. And this revelation about Style has totally shifted and coloured everything Style has done in a new light for me. Because not only does this totally explain Style's sometimes almost stubbornly childish demeanour (it's common in adults who've had to 'grow up' too early), but also why Style shows seemingly random flashes of insight and maturity when they are most crucial. Notably, Style has this almost instinctive sense of when he needs to back off a sore point with Fadel that I couldn't quite put my finger on until this episode.

I've seen a few jokes about Style's awkward subject change, but I've actually got a friend who I hold very dear to my heart who was one of the only people to give me a sense of normalcy and comfort when my dad was on his last few days and then at his funeral. And part of that was the instinctive way she would know when I needed to just. Not be a grieving daughter for a few minutes. To get a small respite from the overwhelming hopelessness and sense of impending loss. To get a moment to breathe and gather my strength, because knowing I was never going to see my dad again, or hear his voice, or hold his hand was tearing me apart back then. Sometimes she'd talk to me about college drama, sometimes she'd introduce a new kpop video to me, sometimes she'd just ask me what I wanted to eat and take me to go have a meal with her. And sometimes there really just isn't anything else to say other than "I'm sorry." Nothing you say - nothing you can say - is going to ever, ever make this grief go away, and in most cases, it was better when people (especially those who couldn't really understand) didn't try.

And I think if you look at Fadel very closely, there's a moment of genuine surprise (Fadel wasn't expecting the subject change at all) and then... something that looks like fondness mixed with exhausted relief. Because I don't think Fadel was ready to talk about his parents yet. This was honesty he wasn't ready to give Style, mostly prompted because Style himself had willingly been so vulnerable that a part of Fadel wanted to reciprocate. But further down that path lies not only his darkest memories, but also the connection to the part of his life he is not willing to share with Style yet. So this subject change is a relief, it's a blessing, but it's also Style knowing when he shouldn't push any further with Fadel's fragile heart.

Which brings me back to how well the episode's theme of trust (both deserved and undeserved) was woven in this episode. This is true on multiple levels and characters but I'm not even going to attempt to touch Kant in this post because... Lord, that is beyond me at the moment. Someone else needs to do that, pretty please, so I can reblog it and scream.

It starts, somewhat unexpectedly, with Fadel asking for entrance into the intimate spaces of Style's life.

So, this episode was not about Fadel's fear of his own feelings, desires, or even affection for Style - that appears to be fully addressed in episode 4. I think that's why we see Fadel be so physically affectionate and indulgent of Style in this episode. He's come to terms with his lust for Style's body (hence his comfort in initiating sex), he's accepted Style as his boyfriend and so can enjoy Style's playful teasing (still reluctantly, but Fadel is still an introvert even if he's mostly enjoying Style's rambunctious nature), and give into Style's (and Bison's and Kant's) cajoling with relatively little fuss.

He's even comfortable toying with the edges of revealing his darker and more sinister side by reminding Style implicitly about how violent Fadel has the potential to be. Recall that Fadel knows Style knows some of his capacity for violence; he just doesn't know how very thoroughly Style is aware of the full scale of this truth. It does help that Style evidences no actual fear and, in fact, looks positively euphoric. Like, buddy, pal, dearest one... please control yourself.

And yet something very, very telling is the way the show makes it a point to depict Fadel very deliberately getting drunk during the double date. Even before the date has started, Fadel looks to be about half a beer in and we see him constantly drinking, drinking, drinking during the whole date. From the conversation about trust he has with Style while Kant and Bison are being off key and adorable about it, to after Kant leaves and Bison gets worried. And we've seen Fadel cope with emotional and mental distress with alcohol before, so we know that Fadel is internally fighting some kind of very intense battle even as he is also very clearly enjoying moments with Style on this date (most notably when they're dancing by the bowling lanes and when Style asks him to go home with him).

So here's my take: rather than being about love, this is about Fadel fighting to hold onto his own philosophy on relationships and trust. Because as much as I do believe Fadel believes he's telling the truth when he tells Style that 100% trust is "impossible", I think it's clear that's not what he wants.

What he wants is to finish this last job so that the only thing he can't be honest about with Style will finally stop being a factor in his life. What he wants is to fully and completely reciprocate the openness Style seems to be giving Fadel. What he wants is to switch off his brain and let his heart lead for once, to stop fighting a battle he has no desire to win anymore, only he can't. Trust (not love) is Fadel's final frontier, and one which he can't quite give up in spite of himself.

Which is why I think Fadel intentionally gets himself drunk here. Because he wants to let his guard down around Style. He wants to open himself fully, he wants to "lay himself bare" for Style, he wants Style to know the full truth and accept him anyway - and he gets so close, but can't quite get there - because he doesn't know that Style already has.

When Style says this, Fadel thinks it's empty words, not knowing that Style has long passed the bar Fadel thinks is insurmountable. And just like Style was able to offer safety and reassurance to the vulnerability Fadel was showing in episode 4, Style instinctively gets to the core of Fadel's darkest fears again:

Style: One day, I'll be your 100%.

This isn't (just) a promise that Style will wear Fadel's stubbornness down, or that Style will be worthy of Fadel's 100% (which, already, has me in tears, ngl). Beyond that, this is Style promising Fadel isn't ruined for this; that it isn't too late, that whatever hurts and wounds Fadel has can be made whole again. That the kind of honest and all-encompassing and unconditional trust which Fadel says is impossible can, in fact, be his. That Fadel still has the capacity to trust and be trusted the way he so desperately, painfully longs for.

I know a lot of people have said Style in this episode is writing cheques he has no ability to honour, but I think it's more layered than that. Because in a very significant and profound way, Style is wholly deserving of Fadel's trust. Because in all the ways that Fadel has ever known he should want, Style actually IS worthy of his trust. Style knows the truth Fadel is hiding, knows what this man is capable of, knows the danger of being in his arms, knows the likely nonexistent future Fadel has to offer him -- and wants him anyway. Style is a man who would stare into Fadel’s darkness and reach out first. Strip away the complication of Kant being blackmailed and dragging Style into his mission, and Style is literally perfect for Fadel. He is exactly what Fadel wants (and possibly has wanted for a very long time). He is, in fact, exactly what Fadel needs to ever experience anything beyond the shadow of a life he's had so far.

But oh, the cruel narrative means that Style is also, simultaneously, painfully undeserving of Fadel's trust; and this is something Style is very much aware of. I think that's why he's trying so very hard to be worthy in all the other ways he can be. Style's awareness of what Fadel is hiding enables Style to (counterintuitively) be completely honest about his feelings for and about Fadel even as he cannot reveal his motivations. So he gives Fadel as much honesty as he can: offers the vulnerability of his own pain and hurts; the comfort of his true understanding and acceptance.

And just as Fadel's vulnerability in the abandoned factory was met with Style choosing a form of physical connection that prioritised Fadel's pleasure (it's made very clear that Style is jerking Fadel off and that all his focus in that moment was on Fadel, not his own pleasure), so too is this moment met with Style very intentionally choosing to worship Fadel's body with all the tenderness and genuine emotional weight that Style wanted Fadel to have in their first time in the storeroom.

Because, crucially, this was Style giving Fadel the chance to lay himself at least physically bare. This is the closest either of them can get to full honesty with the secrets they both are keeping. It's why Style tries so very hard to show the care and adoration and genuine feelings he has for Fadel. Why he makes sure that the vulnerability of Fadel getting himself as drunk and as relaxed and as trusting as Fadel can allow himself to be is tied only to gentleness and tenderness and pleasure.

Because Style actually knows that Fadel can't (and shouldn't) trust him in the way Fadel truly wishes to.

And as much as I believe that Style genuinely means this from the bottom of his heart, the horrifying full truth is that it is Style that has the metaphorical knife hovering over Fadel's chest. He is the one with the capacity to actually give Fadel a new scar that would truly matter. He is, in fact, the only one Fadel wants to fully trust -- and this, along with Style's compromised heart, makes it so that the circumstances will doom them both.

[respectthepetty]

The Heart Killers' Colors? - Ep. 4

Before I begin my investigation into the fourth episode's colors, in case it was not clear, I find Joong very attractive, and when Fadel was looking through Kant's pockets a little aggressively and very homoerotically, I was rooting for First to add another boy's lips to his roster.

BREAK UP THE SHIPS CHALLENGE 2025!

Since I'm afraid that I'm two seconds away from abandoning my efforts to uncover colors in this show so I can turn this into a Joong appreciation blog, let me focus on what I actually came here to do — appreciate Joong Fadel for always being a Black Brooder.

And thankfully Red Rascal Bison is wearing red and blue shorts, but I don't know who the blue could possibly be for since Kant and Style refuse to show their true color!

But back to Fadel being a Black Brooder who just happens to be played by the very attractive Joong.

Fadel is my rock in this show. He never wavers in his color. When all these other boys do wonky stuff like wear red, so I can't figure out their color, Fadel always stays brooding in black.

So I'm holding onto the knowledge that Fadel IS a Black Brooder while I stare in confusion at Style wear red and Kant wear black again this episode which is an inverse of their love interest! And Bison wore blue, but I've previously guessed this is him hiding his true color after attempting to go full BDSM on Kant the night before.

Yet, as usual with Kant, he has a little red on his back. He has had red writing on his shirts before, so is he really in love with Bison already? I think so.

Because as much as I'm upset at Kant for hiding his color, Bison IS a Red Rascal, so Kant having red writing on his shirt multiple times now gives me hope that he is realizing he loves this little demon more than he thought he would especially after Bison noticed what was happening with his brother (and saved the kids from sexual grooming, which is what Bison believes he does for Mother).

So I'll cut him some slack for not showing his true color yet, and I'll keep assuming it is blue since his background is blue while Kant's is red.

But it seems like Kant has a type, and that type is hell raiser.

So even though Bison gave Kant a heart, he didn't get Bison's heart since it wasn't placed over Kant's heart and it's not in Bison's color.

Because Bison would just as quickly kill Kant as he would kiss him, and both of them ending the episode clearly on their own side matching the wall they stood in front of shows that Kant has his work cut out for him.

But considering the boys are wearing couple's shirts with their initials on them next week, I think Kant has some tricks up his tattooed sleeve.

Like sending his best buddie to keep Fadel busy by having sex with him, so he can try looking for more clues, and since Fadel and Style also have incorrectly color-coded couple's shirts with their initials on them, I'm going to assume it's not going to go well.

Because Kant and Style still don't know the guys they are falling in love with if they can't even wear the right color for them. Bison is a Red Rascal and Fadel is a Black Brooder! Two halves of one heart! Get it together, besties!

And now that they think the guy they have been sent to kill had something to do with the deaths of their parents, their emotions are going to be an overdrive.

Especially Bison, who seems to have picked up Mother's color on his journey to become a killer, since he was neutral as a kid.

Yet Fadel, my rock in the color storm, has always been a Black Brooder.

And unlike Bison, who has spontaneous outbursts that could end everyone, Fadel is much more calculated.

So for Style who, according to the folks behind the show, should be a (light) Blue Boy, to be strategic in his plan to annoy Fadel just so he could make Fadel miss him was brilliant.

I want to believe that Fadel is playing Style, but I thought in episode two the reason Fadel hated Style so much was because Style messed up his very calculated plans, which is exactly what he expressed in this episode; therefore, I think this entire conversation was Fadel being honest.

Pretty boy Icarus done flown too close to the sun and got himself a killer boyfriend.

And, once again, I think Fadel's feelings for Style are real because Fadel laughs and smiles a lot around Style.

And my pretty emo boy doesn't smile for anybody!

So these two idiots better get their plan and colors together, quick!

Because Bison stays red . . . dee to commit murder

And Fadel is already too deep (in the blue) to even realize how much he actually likes his (light) Blue Boy.

So even though Style is now trying to be cautious in his yellow and back off, Fadel is coming in hot.

But I'm unsure if it's because he is passionate about Style now that all his warmth has been unlocked or if he will burn Icarus for getting too close.

Or, more importantly, when it comes to Fadel, if there is even a difference between those two things.

[bubbipond]

I knew media literacy was down while watching We Are and people were hating on Fang for not being as lovey dovey as Tan. Incapable of seeing that Fang had his own form of "lovey dovey" in his actions versus Tan and his words. So people watching dramas like The Heart Killers and straight up missing very obvious points doesn't shock me. I'm not making fun of people by any means, I just think too much of the QL media world lacks some form of literacy while watching these shows.

People are bad mouthing Kant like he's some sort of supervillain or antagonist. You don't even need knowledge of Taming of the Shrew to understand the dynamics between the four mc's (though if you want some, there are people on here diving into that). My point is, Kant, Style, Bison, and Fadel are not meant to be squeaky clean characters. I mean two of them are manipulating the other two, sleeping with them, and lying to them. While the other two are literal murderers. You aren't supposed to think these guys are totally upstanding. But the emphasis on Kant hate is bizarre.

Especially since Kant has always had most to lose in this. Style only really has to worry about his own safety but he already knows Fadel won't kill him.

Bison/Fadel could easily kill both boys or get "mom" to fix their issues. So they both have ways out regardless of both being in love. But Kant has always had no way out. So much of this story is a conversation about what people will do when they are desperate with backs against the wall. Outside of Style, the other 3 had lives they had no control over.

There's so many layers and social issues at play in this that I cannot fathom people focusing on hating Kant. But that's just me.

+Don't even say that I am a firstkhao Stan which is why I'm saying this because this is actually only the second time l've watched them. The only other time was OF and I didn't even watch that for them. So this has nothing to do with bias.

[heretherebedork]

Style is eager to see Fadel and obviously watching their restaurant because he needs to see him again and can't imagine that he could truly be left behind even for Fadel's own safety and Fadel's finding out that Style is working with Kant and the police is to break his own heart, to take one last dance, to take another kiss, to confess his love. This is his last chance, his last dance, now he's closing himself off again but he wants this so desperately. When Style finds a way to prove he truly loves him... there's nothing that will keep them apart when that trust returns.

Kant is drinking alone, buried in guilt, shocked when he sees Bison again and questioning if he can do this again, if he can keep doing this, not looking for him because he knows that his future is just as much in the balance as theirs and Bison is already distrusting, greeting him but waiting, asking if he's feeling guilt, asking if anything weighs him down, watching his phone and following him to see the final betrayal and his pain is anger, his pain is a heart that shattered into the sharpest pieces of glass. Kant is not just going to have to prove himself but to remind Bison of what his heart looked like before this happened.

Fadel has had his heart broken before but he tried to protect Bison and Bison dreamt of love and freedom only to watch all his dreams and plans be crushed by the betrayal and now they will be pretending along alongside two men who have truly come to love them and now must prove it again, must earn back trust and love from people whose lives have been shaped by loss and revenge and death.

[ropebunnykant]

at first i didn’t think the “fadel is faking it to get info on style” thing was a genuine theory people were believing but i saw so many people thinking it in the comments of an edit of the scene in the woods on tiktok and just. i fear it comes from a genuine misunderstanding of fadel as a character.

like in general fadel is just. not a liar. like i feel like one thing we’ve learned about fadel is that despite coming off cold and kind of mean and you know being a literal assassin, he has very strong morals, and it seems like one of those morals includes honesty. or in the very least - not lying. cause obviously he has to a certain extent for his work as an assassin, but in general most things about that job go against fadel as he is - he just justifies it all by telling himself what their mother told him, that these are bad people who deserve it. and he has so many opportunities to lie to style and say no i don’t like you, or no, i don’t find you attractive, or x y z, but his method of dealing with style is always avoidance, rather than directly lying to him. so for him to fake a very real, very vulnerable confession, it just doesn’t make any sense.

especially because the other thing we know for sure about fadel is that he does Not do vulnerable. he has an extremely rough and hard exterior for a reason - even BISON says he thinks fadel is rough on the inside as well. if even bison, who is fadel’s brother and the person he cares about the most, believes fadel isn’t capable of love and vulnerability, i don’t believe for a second fadel would want to or even be willing to fake that kind of thing. his vulnerability in that scene came from a genuine place and breaking point - you can hear it in his voice. which like, shoutout to joong because his acting in that scene was fucking incredible and i feel like it’s a discredit to him as an actor to claim any of that felt fake but i digress. and sure, maybe fadel is just a good actor, and sure he likely has the best poker face, but with how allergic he is to acknowledging his feelings, i don’t believe he’d be able to fake it.

plus, we also know for a fact he wasn’t lying because we saw during the episode the ways he was missing style - he didn’t even ask anyone anything at his morning jog, so we know for sure he wasnt just looking for style for show.

and while i understand wanting to justify the fact that it seems like he broke quickly, i just think if you feel the need to question that, you haven’t actually been paying much attention to fadel at all. or you just have a fundamental misunderstanding of how repression works. because fadel has been repressing himself for very likely years, has been holding in an insane amount of pain and grief for so long - like, it’s clear that even bison is unaware of the fact that fadel once had someone he loved and lost. which means the only people he’s talked to about it are the strangers at the loss support group - IF that because i would not put it past fadel to never say a word at those meetings, i mean in both instances that we see him in the group setting, he doesn’t say anything even before style shows up.

fadel has had his heart walled up and been dealing with his grief and loss all on his own. and he has spent WEEKS pushing style away and trying to keep him at arms length. so of course, of course when someone comes in and not only says they want him, his heart, and comes in with sledge hammers to tear down those walls, they’re gonna crumble.

and you know maybe i’ll eat my words, but i just can’t fathom the idea that any of that confession was fake to fadel, and i think if you do you’re just misunderstanding him.

[thequeenofsastiel]

Well that episode was QUITE the emotional roller-coaster and broke my heart into tiny tiny pieces. This is the first ep in which I started to genuinely think that Kant had feelings for Bison. The LOOK on his face when he saw Bison felt like an entirely real emotion. I loved it, even though it hurt me.

Jfc, the fact that it took finding out that Style was betraying him for Fadel to fully admit his true feelings about Style was fucking heartbreaking. Because Fadel was just faced with the idea that Style's affection for him at no point was real. That Style had been faking it the whole time. And the worst part is that Style was ABSOLUTELY faking it at first. Sure, he found Fadel attractive, but he didn't actually like him. He harassed him and tried to win his heart for a goddamn car. He never would have tried to date Fadel on his own. Sure, I think he definitely did eventually fall for Fadel, but it was indeed an act at first. Fadel doesn't know the real reason why, but he does know that it was at some point an act, he just doesn't actually know for how long. And neither he nor Bison have any reason to believe that Style or Kant had genuine feelings for them. But they did. It was simply that those feelings weren't strong enough to risk getting in trouble with the law themselves, which is ENTIRELY understandable.

I'm very interested to see where they go from here and how Style and Kant prove that their feelings actually were real at the end. I imagine it'll take them sacrificing themselves in some way for Fadel and Bison. I'm not sure. They were just so good at pretending that they weren't betraying Fadel and Bison. I can't imagine what Style could do that would ever make Fadel trust him entirely, nor Kant. Anyone have any ideas?

10/10

[mon--carat]

A Morally Grey Tangent

This essay has been bubbling up in me since We Best Love: Fighting Mr 2nd aired, but it's finally come to the top.

I decided to write this after seeing numerous people say that The Heart Killers is bad or damaging due to the nature of the character's behaviour despite it making sense plot-wise.

These characters do not need to be good people. They aren't real and therefore, aren't to be held to real-life standards.

If you go into a series like The Heart Killers, Kinnporsche or even We Best Love knowing what it is about, why are you shocked and scandalised when they act morally grey? Or commit dubious and violent acts? I'm sorry but the trailer made that very clear.

Don't get me wrong, I completely understand not wanting to watch triggering content; I have my own triggers that I must be extremely careful to avoid but saying a series is "bad" for including such scenes is unrealistic.

A specific example I want to discuss is Style and Fadel's locker scene in episode two of The Heart Killers as it received lots of backlash.

Did Style sexually assault Fadel? Yes. Was it dub-con? Yes. But does it make sense plot and character-wise? Yes. Assuming these characters are going to behave per moral norms and societal expectations is a bit misguided. Fadel and Bison are serial killers, Kant is a liar and a thief while Style ignores boundaries and acts carelessly.

P'Jojo isn't claiming that murder is okay, in the same way he isn't claiming that sexual assault or drugging people is okay. Furthermore, P'Jojo has made it clear that his work will include heavier topics (see Only Friends) as it's important to produce queer content of all types.

In short, if you can't handle The Heart Killers, go and watch something PG-13 and leave the rest of us alone.

[sunsetsover]

i saw something that had me thinking about the different relationships fadel and kant both have with their baby brothers and i genuinely can't stop thinking about it. especially when you look at how similar their experiences really are. like they're not just big brothers, but they're care givers too. guardians. obviously we don't know anything about anyone's upbringing rn, but given the little we know about lilly i doubt she was a hands on mother figure to those boys. i'm willing to bet they were housed and fed, but other than that they were just kind of left to fend for themselves, and it's likely that fadel, seeing bison - who is younger than him, smaller than him, more overtly emotional and in an environment that was so volatile and likely violent- immediately took responsibility of him and his well being. there's no doubt he took care of bison - he's bison's big brother. bison obviously loves and respects him. but one of the first things we learn about their relationship is that fadel also took on the role of a pseudo-parent when the role of actual parent was absent - are you my brother or my father, fadel?

it's an honourable thing to do, something that comes from a place of love and care. but in the process fadel has sacrificed having a brotherly relationship with bison. i mean jesus christ, bison doesn't even know what fadel's likes and hobbies are. he literally locks his bedroom door when he's not inside. and i've seen multiple blaming bison for that, like he doesn't even care about fadel and who he is deep down, but at the end of the day how is bison supposed to know what fadel doesn't tell him? bison is so open and honest with fadel - he tells him what he wants to do, who he wants to be, how he wants to live. as far as he's concerned there are no secrets between them. he's open about his budding relationship with kant and the fact that he doesn't want to have to lie to him. i'm sure he thinks, maybe naively, that fadel would just offer him the same kind of openness if he wanted to, but that he just doesn't want to. bison clearly doesn't like the fact that fadel is so cold and clinical, esp with him. i bet he doesn't even really understand why fadel is the way he is. but that was the point. that openness and that hope is something i bet fadel has worked so fucking hard to keep alive in bison even to his own detriment. but at the same time he's closed himself off so tightly from bison - the only person he seems to have in his life rn - that bison barely knows who he is. like how the fuck is bison supposed to know that fadel has a heart when bison is never allowed to see it?

like you know how for a lot of people there comes a point as you get older where you stop seeing your parents as parents and start seeing them as people with with wants and desires and lives outside of being a Parent? well bison hasn't reached that point yet. he still sees fadel as Big Brother, who doesn't let him go out or have friends or date people. who walks in when he's in the middle of hooking up with a guy and doesn't even have decency to turn away and let them make themselves decent. who makes bison do chores in order to be allowed out, like he's a teenager and not a grown man in his 20s. like tbh can you blame bison for being a little harsh on fadel sometimes, really? fadel treats him like a child. and so bison acts like one. that's their dynamic: like father and son, not brothers. and that means there are walls between them that are in many ways one sided. a son should be able to tell a father anything, but a father will always have parts of himself hidden away from his son.

compare that to kant and babe's relationship. we don't know exactly when kant and babe's parents passed and how long kant has been acting as babe's guardian, but i'm willing to bet it hasn't been very long. why? because kant still treats babe as his brother first, guardian second. kant obviously still takes the role of babe's guardian seriously - he is literally putting his life on the line in order not only to keep babe safe, but to make sure he has a good life. i'm sure the car thieving had something to with babe as well. in that way he's very much like fadel. but at the same time he hasn't put the walls up between himself and his brother that fadel has. even from the little we've seen of their relationship they feel like brothers - they bicker and they tease and they both laugh about it. fadel and bison bicker and it often feels like a parent chastising a child. kant expresses concern and sets some boundaries - don't be home too late - but he's not on babe's ass the way fadel is on bison's. there are open lines of communication between babe and kant - babe tells kant about his books and his desire to see a shakespeare play in the uk, kant seeks babe's advice when he's not sure how to move his relationship with bison along. and sure kant still holds things back and there is a little bit of distance there because he is still babe's guardian and babe's still a kid. but even with all that, the walls that exist between fadel and bison just don't really exist babe and kant.

of course there's nuance to all of this. bison and fadel's upbringing and lifestyle necessitates a caution that kant and babe's just doesn't. fadel has likely been acting as guardian for longer than kant has, and so has grown into - and probably grown up with - the role in ways kant hasn't. fadel very well may have been looking after bison since he was a child, even as a child himself, and that of course requires something different and changes the dynamics of a relationship in ways that taking in your teenage brother as a 20-something year old man just doesn't. babe seems pretty well behaved, where bison is a bit of a loose canon and trusts a little too easily and their mother is fucking scary - to a certain degree bison probably needs a leash on him, and fadel needs to keep him safe. but at the same time, how is bison to realise all of that when fadel has clearly gone above and beyond to shield bison from harm and from the realities of their lifestyle and maybe even who their mother is and what she's capable of? again, bison can't know what no one tells him.

and the thing is i think bison knows he's being kept in the dark and held at arms length, even if it's just subconscious. fadel locks him out. he's cold and harsh and we the audience know (or can assume) why, but bison doesn't. all he knows is that his brother has him practically under house arrest and doesn't trust him in his bedroom and is trying to ruin his new relationship. as i've said before, it's probably why he's so desperate for the affection and attention kant's giving him - where else is he getting it? and then it goes back to control: fadel has so much, bison has none. of course he's going to fight for whatever little scrap of it he can get, even if he has to behave brattish in the process.

this just turned into me rambling about fadel and bison's relationship at some point but i just think it's interesting how similar kant and fadel are in their motives - to protect their baby brothers - and yet how different their behavior and therefore their relationships with their brothers are in contrast.

[tortibomb]

IVE BEEN SITTING HERE EMPTY FOR HOURS 😭

Like what does it mean!!? Fadel finds out Style is involved and he goes back inside and tells Style he loves him. Is he turning up the music to drown out the truth that he now knows, to pretend everything is normal? Or is he going to make Style so much more attached to him break his heart in return.

Fadel plans. He can be meticulous. He will/can come up with ways to torment Style. Or he has already fallen too far and wants to ignore the truth.

And obviously the truth he knows isn’t the full truth. Yes, Style was bribed and that’s not great but he also wasn’t in on the whole informant thing like Kant was.

I saw an edit on insta and I’m crying 😭

AND BISON 😭

He is so so so angry and hurt but Kant is hurt too. Kant has broken your trust, he has broken your heart, but he was breaking his own heart in the process.

I just have a lot of feelings about these four fictional men right now.

I need to take a plane to Thailand, bring a pitchfork to gmmtv, break in and watch the remaining episodes.

[bird-inacage]

The Heart Killers EP7: The Boat Scene 'Do you want to jump or do you want to fall?'

So yep, joke's on me. I was so wrong about how this scene may unfold and the episode in general. Credit to Jojo for keeping me on my toes. I wanted to dedicate a post to this, both for the fantastic performances but also the great character beats here.

BISON'S RESOLVE FOR REVENGE

I kept wondering just how resolute Bison would be. I thought that if he saw how upset Kant was about him getting hurt, he may waver. But it actually seemed to have the opposite effect.

Bison is understandably livid at Kant. I think a portion of that rage is intensified because it's with himself. The betrayal cuts deeper due to his own negligence. He should have known better, and Fadel warned him as such. As the confrontation unfolds, Bison's steely resolve veers towards agitation and restlessness. A twitch. An itch beneath the skin. An almost defiant urgency to squash any margin for hesitancy or doubt - that the sooner this is over with, the less risk there is for him to have second thoughts. Khao does a wonderful job of trickling out only the tiniest of hairline cracks in that resolve, to keep us guessing.

Forcing Kant to jump could also be a test for remorse. 'If I tell you to jump, will you do it or will you fight back or even beg for mercy?' If Bison wanted Kant dead, he could have done it already. We see him consider all the brutal ways he could do so. And yet the one he chooses is actually the least hands on. Watching Kant enact his own demise seems to be a testament to something Bison wants an answer to: a confession perhaps. 'Are you sorry for what you did? Do you regret it? Do you feel bad for me? Was it worth it?' and most importantly 'Do you love me? Did you ever love me?' When someone hurts us, we often want them to admit to their wrongdoing. To take responsibility for the damage they've caused as it gives validation to our pain.

Kant is debilitated by fear, but he's also resigned to his guilt. It's been chasing him this entire time. So he doesn't deny or rebuff what Bison's saying. Doesn't try to deflect or swerve like he's done before now. Neither does he put up a fight for his life. He displays a bedded in helplessness, an acceptance that something you saw coming has finally caught up to you.

When Kant does jump, it seems to take Bison a second to register what's happened. The fact that Kant doesn't come back up. The realisation that Kant may actually drown and die. And he panics.

KANT LAID BARE

(This is my cue to gush about First's acting). I loved his choice of line delivery in this scene. How quietly he speaks. How small, tired, broken and subdued this makes Kant appear. It's such an unexpected but phenomenal choice. It provides a complete 180 to Kant's usual brand of flirty showmanship. That's isn't to say that version of Kant is entirely false but he's definitely been playing up the 'perfect boyfriend' bit. To be as smooth and charming as possible, and to say all the right things to win Bison's heart. This is the first time Bison is seeing Kant stripped of all that bravado. And what's left underneath? Just a man whose desperately afraid.

The sheer terror that First portrays here is so layered and visceral. He doesn't just capture that primal fear of death, but there's so much more you can read into outside of the little he does say. Underlying all that physical and mental torment is trauma, a childlike desperation that renders him completely at a loss.

He didn't have a choice when Chris threatened him to become a pawn. He didn't have a choice when it came to choosing between his brother or Bison. He didn't have a choice to walk away. And now he doesn't have a choice in how Bison wants his revenge. I've talked about the loss of control and agency with these two characters quite a bit, but this is the epitome of having your autonomy entirely stripped from you. Kant is both paralysed by his fear of drowning, but also by his guilt and knowing that he brought this on himself - having sealed his fate when he agreed to the job in the first place.

"I promise when you wake up, the version of me you'll see is the real me." What happens when you strip a person of all their defences? You get down to their rawest form. And now we're seeing it.

Thank god the pair reconcile next week, because this was absolutely agonising to sit through. Firstkhao have done it again, but did we really expect any less?

You can keep tabs on bird-inacage’s BL meta directory for my other long-form posts around The Heart Killers, which I’ll be updating in real time as the show airs.

[fadelbison]

interestingly i keep typing bisonfadel for your url x 10?

a small detail in ep2 1/4 fadel keeps his room locked

wow you come into my house and go straight for the beast's lair, huh?

let's talk about the locked room, nonnie. but before that i must talk about everything that's fucking bison up and then in my true adhd magic it will all somehow tie back to that godforsaken locked room.

[Screenshot from Bison's intro where he says "I also don't like...liars"

See, no one knows Bison better than Khaotung and when I watched his intro again, I thought the things he said felt significant; had more layers than perhaps I initially thought (yes im aware he also pulled that northern lights self insert not everything that comes out of that beautiful mouth can be gems).

And well, this thing about liars. It's obviously about Kant, very very obviously. But Bison gets lied to a lot. By everyone and he's in the dark a lot, and unfortunately unlike Styles he's neither curious nor very perceptive (you have to stick to the end to figure out why this is not a criticism). In fact, he can sometimes be a little shockingly obtuse.

[Screenshots of Bison saying "He (Fadel) doesn't believe in love" and "Too bad I have an actual beating heart, unlike the dead cold thing in your chest"

first of all, sir, you are asian you can't just go badmouth your brother to some random guy you fucked once. but also what a cruel thing to think about your brother - a brother who is abundant in acts of service and towards whom bison shows, frankly, very little fear. bianca and kat are in high school, you can't lift their personalities onto adults and have them mean the same things.

Bison is an adult, with arguably the exact same responsibilities as Fadel. He doesn't just work at the burger place.

He owns it too. They do the exact same job, they're under the same pressure. How obtuse does he have to be to conclude that Fadel, whom he trusts in absolutes and genuinely loves, doesn't have any needs????

a genuinely insane thing to say about Fadel. Style cracks that egg open in one day. Fadel is constantly giving into Bison, for literally everything except things that will make Khun Mae angry. there's no malice between the two brothers either. It's abundantly clear Bison adores Fadel, wants the best for him, trusts his judgement and most importantly wants his approval.

Yes, he's edging Kant, but he's also sincerely trying to get Fadel's approval. He really, really wants everything to happen above the board. He wants to do right by Kant and Fadel. They're both really important, that's why they both get to have stakes in his dating life.

Fadel loves Bison so much that I genuinely think that Bison is his heart. He was so fragile from the heartbreak of his first love (or maybe even just the hardships of this career path idk) that he poured it all into Bison (yes it is very Wen Kexing and Gu Xiang of them tyvm). How could Bison think that Fadel doesn't believe in love?

It wasn't until i saw bison engaging in non consensual sex with Kant, completely unknowingly, because Kant lied about consenting. Except it was so obvious, it was so obvious he was lying. But Bison couldn't see it because he was drugged, because Kant impaired his ability to see the truth....

...Locked door.

Fadel and Bison are so in sync in some ways, the assassinations for sure. Fadel doesn't forget to include Bison when it comes to getting their mark

And all the cute bickering. But they also kind of just bicker? Kant and Babe have a sliver of Fadel and Bison's time, but their interactions are a lot more balanced, which includes bickering. But also other things like hanging out, talking about school, books, dreams.

like a true asian father fadel has forgot to sprinkle in even an ounce of intimacy amidst all that devotion. Forget sharing his past trauma, fadel has locked his bedroom, his interests, even his schedule away. I can't get over how Bison simply doesn't know what Fadel does every day even though he does the exact same thing.

Bison isn't incapable of getting real, he gets real with Kant, establishes boundaries, shuts him down, cares for him.

But with Fadel it kind of feels as though a constant undercurrent of conflict or a threat is necessary to keep them afloat. Fadel loves him but without this constant beating against Fadel's rough insides, would Fadel even talk to him? take an interest in him? notice what he wears? or asks him what his favorite story is?

Anyway, yeah it's weird that Fadel keeps his bedrom door locked. Maybe, Bison pranked on him too hard once.

[secriden]

Going legitimately insane because all my brain has been able to chew on has been this particular callback and what it means for the headspace that Fadel is in at the end of episode 6.

Fadel starts the episode with his walls so utterly dismantled that he is able to verbally admit this desire to Bison (and, more importantly, himself) out loud . . . only to end the episode brokenheartedly discarding that dream as he instead offers to fashion himself into what he (thinks) Style wants, not knowing that he is already everything that Style has come to desire.

It's insane that Fadel even said that to Bison in the first place because the Fadel of episode 5 knew better than to believe it was possible for anyone to truly bare themselves to another person, knew better than to want to know and be known and chosen despite it all. To the Fadel of episode 5, "laying yourself bare" was an impossibility because of how much power it gives the other person, and Fadel's mind is too practical, his circumstances too complex, his heart too fragile to ever give that to anyone ever again.

But Fadel's walls began to crack in the face of Style's honesty and the shared pain of knowing what it is to loose someone precious; shuddered under the weight of Style pressing kisses to his scar and laying Fadel bare to bring him pleasure; shattered in the face of Style giving himself over to loving Fadel for a whole night -- and Fadel woke up half underneath the spread of Style's body and found himself already in love.

And do you know how I know this? Because of all the things Fadel could have said he liked about Style, he chooses this. It's not that Style is effortlessly kind and thoughtlessly generous at times. It's not that Style is hot and sexy and frankly kind of a slut (specifically for Fadel). It's not even that Style has secret, hidden depths and an unexpectedly shared pain which allows him to understand and empathise with Fadel in a way that no one but Bison has been able to for a very long time.

No, it's his cockiness. His arrogance. The way Style is unabashedly himself and makes no apologies for it. The way Style will literally dance to his own tune and sing at the top of his lungs with no care for anyone else's opinion unless it's to appreciate it. The way Style walks into the room and has the confidence to put his body on display and already know that he will be welcomed and wanted -- and this confidence meant that he assumed Fadel would find him attractive, and would not stop until Fadel eventually gave in to that attraction.

It's telling that it's these specific instances that come to mind when Fadel thinks about Style's lips. There are so many scenes and shots they could have chosen (because lbr here Dunk, and therefore Style, really does have amazing lips), so it feels very intentional that Fadel thinks firstly of the time Style refused to back off when Fadel pretended not to miss him, and then the moment when Fadel finally admitted that he did and was rewarded with Style's reassurance and reciprocated vulnerability and wholehearted embrace. Also, because this was the last episode that Style did not Know, and therefore was still being fully honest with Fadel. Both instances are Fadel appreciating in hindsight the way Style's very nature -- the way he would not give up, the way he keeps pushing and pushing even in the face of Fadel's seeming impassivity -- gives Fadel not only the opportunity but the impetus to finally let go of his control and acknowledge his feelings for Style.

It's explicit confirmation that Fadel enjoys and appreciates and has grown to love Style's personality and antics and the way he expresses himself.

So the Fadel in episode 6 dares to ask for Style's honesty and gives with it an explicit promise of trust and acceptance in return. After recognising the effort Style has had to put in to find ways to connect with Fadel (heavy metal vs pop rock), he now asks for Style to be real with him because Fadel understands himself to be ready to love, and in loving Style, is able to offer the very thing he wants the most from Style: "acceptance of who he really is".

We also see the evidence of Fadel's unspoken promise in the way that he now responds with an almost easy openness to Style's questions in stark contrast to the Fadel in the early part of the show. If he wants Style to accept him, he can't continue keeping all his secrets. So now, he gives Style pieces of himself with barely a thought, and lets Style use them to push and prod and drag to light the very things he used to keep hidden because he thought they weren't useful or helpful or worthy of being loved (see @sherrymagic's gorgeous gifset + my tags on it).

It's also in the way he now allows Style to take him outside of his comfort zone because he trusts that the private joys he's kept to himself are safe in Style's hands; that, moreover, Style will look to Fadel's happiness and not make a mockery of it.

I'm obsessed with the moment in the screenshot on the bottom right because Fadel looks so completely out of his element and almost in a state of shock. He's literally standing separated from the rest of the group in the composition of the shot, hesitation writ in every line of his body, while Style, who isn't even a fan of this band or this music, fits in with the band seamlessly.

But this hesitation isn't because of discomfort, it's nervousness and an almost joyous disbelief because Fadel could never have done this on his own, he would never have allowed himself the indulgence of actually showing his love for his favourite band if Style hadn't taken the initiative to drag him there and ask for the photo. And, oh, how wonderful it must have felt to see Style prove his own words by being right there by Fadel's side as he lets himself go, as he lets himself be himself without fear, for the first time in what must have felt like forever.

In a single, perfect night, Style has been exactly, precisely, breathtakingly everything Fadel could ever have wanted; because in a single night of Fadel finally having the courage to bare himself to another person, Style gave Fadel not only acceptance but a celebration of who Fadel is. With everything Style does that night, he ties himself to Fadel; he ties his happiness to Fadel's and his comfort to the warmth of Fadel's embrace. Style fashioned himself into exactly what Fadel wanted -- and now that Fadel has had a taste of it, how can he possibly go back?

Which is why Fadel already knows that it's too late for him, he knows that he is already in love; knows, moreover, that he has rewritten parts of himself to seek out and miss and yearn for Style; has even learned to love Style the way he understands Style wants to be loved.

So Fadel might as well keep the promise he made to Style with his lips pressed shut against the lies he didn't want to keep telling Style. He might as well give Style more days and nights and chances to spin his lies, because at least Fadel has the meager comfort of knowing he spoke the truth.

Because if Style wants to keep playing this game, if Style is able to so be so convincingly deceptive that Fadel can no longer trust himself to tell when Style is lying, then Fadel will take the punishment of choosing honesty in the face of his betrayal. Fadel will fashion himself into a heartless tool and allow himself the indulgence of playing this tantalising part -- because he may just find a way to save Bison in the process.

And to Fadel, it does not matter if his own heart gets broken along the way, because Fadel deserves the punishment of laying himself bare to the man who does not love him in return; he deserves to give Style the power of knowing the hold he has over Fadel.

But doing so is a punishment for Style, too, because if Fadel must love, then he is going to weaponise his own feelings in the fight he now thinks he has to wage against Style. Because two can play this game of cruelty, and Fadel does not care if this sword is double edged because cutting himself to pieces is a small price to pay if it means dragging Style along with him into hell.

After all, what's another crack when his whole entire world has already been so utterly and completely shattered?

[respectthepetty]

The Heart Killers' Colors? - Ep. 6

I got my bizcochitos and boozy and spicy cinnamon dark hot chocolate (not champurrado, never champurrado), so I'm tipsy, jolly, and ready to watch episode six of The Heart Killers for Joong.

I mean for Fadel.

WAIT! I mean for colors!

Eff the colors! I'm here for water-based lube and condoms! Thank goodness for parents who advocate for safe sex, so I can get myself together after seeing Fadel do the walk of NO shame since Fadel should not feel ashamed for enjoying sex! Thanks, dad, for reminding me of my priorities!

Hold up! Are we switching to Shakespeare's The Tragedy of Othello, the Moor of Venice now?! Because that story dealt with lies and manipulation leading to multiple murders, and we all believe Mother has lied and manipulated these boys into killing others for her own agenda. *sips boozy hot chocolate*

Black Brooder Fadel is lightening up but is wearing red and Red Rascal Bison is wearing blue, so does this mean Style is a Red Rascal and Kant is a Blue Boy? I think the behind-the-scenes people are lying to me.

Style is wearing red again! And Kant is still on his bullshit, but they are sitting at a blue covered table. Does that mean anything?

It would be easier if Kant was a Green Guy (or even a Yellow Yal). It just makes more sense!

Because, regardless of what Bison thinks about blue, he is a Red Rascal.

See! Look at the blue disappear when he becomes passionate!

And a Green Guy would complement him and his aggressive and passionate personality. He would balance him out, and he would be the chill to Bison's no-chill self. They'd be chiles! They'd be Christmas!

And Style would make far more sense as a Red Rascal because of the way he brings out Fadel's desires!

Are you really a Blue Boy, Style?! I don't know because Dunk's arms are distracting me!

But I do know that I would go anywhere and do anything for this man just like Style does. If Fadel wanted to go to Top Golf, I'd go to that stupid frat bro place for my man. If Fadel wanted to go hunting in the woods for a week, I, a vegetarian, would go sit with him in silence for eight to twelve hours a day and make just enough noise to warn the animals, so he couldn't shoot any of them. And if he wanted me to eat Colorado green chile, I would NEVER DO IT because that's fake green chile and a stew, but I'd watch him eat it (while I eat Hatch like a proper person). That's the power of Joong Fadel.

Alexa, play Letters from Cleo's version of "I Want You to Want Me" from 10 Things I Hate About You!

Didn't I see you cryin' Feelin' all alone without a friend You know you feel like dyin' Oh didn't I see you cryin' I want you to want me I need you to need me I'd love you to love me I'm beggin' you to beg me

This is literally the only color I trust in this show right now, Cinematographer Rath.

BECAUSE PINK = 💕LOVE💕

Oh, thank goodness, the brothers are back to their true colors, and by that I mean chloroforming people until they pass out.

WHAT ARE YOUR COLORS?! JUST TELL ME ALREADY!

Now is not the time to serve cunt. Put those tits back in, you two!

Interesting that Mother is not in full red, but like a dulled orange-ish red.

Even more interesting that Keen matches her. I'd be wary of this kid if I was Bison and Fadel.

Kant is now giving me Beetlejuice and Foot Locker realness, but, thankfully, Style is offering me up some of that Blue Boy-ness I keep hearing about. Yes, Style, be loyal to your man! You are in love with a criminal and this type isn't rational; it's physical.

WHY ARE YOU WEARING RED AGAIN THOUGH?! Is it for love?! Fadel is, once again, light. He loves you too, Style. HE LOVES YOU TOO!

Bison is fully back in red now, and I do not think it's because of 💕love💕. 😬😬😬

Kant thought he was going to put Bison behind bars.

But it's about to get very gay and murderous up in here. In the words of one of my favorite Kesha songs, "This place about to blow" and not how Bison usually does it for Kant.

Kant, this twink is going to end you.

That's what you get for not showing your true color.