#extremely undignified i know etc

[landwriter]

dear diary i had a marvelous birthday roadtrip wherein i

had a terrible sinus infection

drove eight hours then waited for a boat for four then saw my best friend’s new place for the first time four hours after that and immediately fell asleep in her bed

hiked for three days (trees trees trees) and swam in a glacial lake

sauna’d

got surprised by a delicious cake while topless (see above)

identified a DOZEN plants for the first time from the trip (and ate so many berries)

bought a great deal of pottery and a nice linen dress

surprised family with a visit <3

saw juvenile barn swallows (v silly beaks)

had old silverware fobbed off on me and decoded the makers marks to learn i have 208-year-old teaspoons! thanks ancestors

drove 1735 kms

got to come back and see home with the fresh peepers you only get when you’ve gone away for a little bit

[tf2yall]

Mercs react to being picked up

Scout

Kinda like a really fussy cat

Makes a big deal of it the first few times and tries to wriggle free.

"What da hell do you think you're doing? Put me down!"

Really doesn't like it in public because he wants to be the big strong man in the relationship >:(

Keep doing it and he'll get used to it. Still doesn't like it in public but won't mind being picked up in private. Still complains tho

Likes to be held but will never ever EVER admit it

Soldier

Doesn't even bat an eye tbh

Oh we're doing this now? Cool.

Soldier's a very touchy person, especially with people he likes so he's very okay with being picked up and carried. Very snuggly and probably wraps his arms around your neck

Don't expect him not to pick you up too tho! Scoops you up bridal style if he's in a playful mood or just straight up tosses you over his shoulder if there's something cool he wants you to go see

Pyro

Heart eyes mf

Pyro's pretty similar to Soldier in that they like both being held and holding their partner.

Loves to be picked up and will probably never stop bugging you to do it again if you do it once

Barely even needs to be supported because they cling like a cuddly little limpet

They're stronger than they look and will have no problem picking you up too

Extremely cuddly. Pyro takes this as an invitation to be in your personal space all the time now. Sorry, they're your best friend now. It's non-negotiable

Heavy

I'm sorry what

Kind of bluescreens because he's honestly impressed that you managed to pick him up

Thinks it's impressive that you're that strong but would really rather prefer you put him down. He just prefers to have his feet on the ground thanks

Would prefer to be the one picking you up altho he'd really prefer nobody get picked up tbh. Unless he's excited or really happy about something. Then he won't think twice about scooping you up and spinning you around!

Engineer

Another one of the mercs who just bluescreens

Definitely freezes for a second as his brain works to catch up with what just happened

Probably starts blushing really hard and gets exceedingly flustered.

"Aww shucks... I didn't know you were that strong, partner."

Again tho, please put him down. He would like to walk thank you very much

Probably won't pick you up either unless a) you ask or b) you're bleeding out and he has to move you to safety

Demo

Like Soldier, doesn't bat an eye

This is just par for the course with Demo. Honestly you'll have a hard time picking him up before he picks you up.

Likes to initiate a lot of playful touch. Wrestling, throwing each other around, ruffling your hair, etc.

Just kinda melts when you pick him up. Lol enjoy holding a Demo puddle.

May or may not fall asleep if you hold him for any length of time

Medic

Oh

Oh hello

Medic starts blushing the instant you pick him up. Kicking his legs and giggling

Starts joking about you being his knight in shining armor.

Probably has a crush on you now if he didn't already. Look, he's just into people who could easily squish him alright???

An overdramatic bitch if he's in the mood to be picked up

"No, I am afraid my injury is too bad! You will have to carry me!"

He stubbed his toe. Jfc medic

Spy

No. No. A million times no.

The first time you do it, he blushes fiercely and runs away and you don't see him for a week.

It is undignified and humiliating and you're going to ruin his reputation and how dare you

More inclined to like it in a romantic relationship but still makes a fuss about it.

That is, until he gets used to it and then he's demanding you carry him everywhere like a spoiled brat

Sniper

Kinda hard to pick up because he's a lanky fuck and he's got so much goddamn legs. It's like picking up a spider

Really really nervous that you're going to drop him. Has a death grip on your shirt

Sniper's pretty confident right up until something happens that he doesn't know how to deal with. Being picked up is one of those things. Probably hiding his face with his hat and blushing really hard and making a big fuss

Can't decide whether or not he likes it

Probably isn't going to stop complaining but he's also not squirming so idk make what you will out of that

[weirwoodsugar]

posting about shipping always makes me feel somewhat undignified but man back in my day enemies to lovers meant something…enemies to lovers needs active animosity it needs a truly adversarial relationship. they have to be ENEMIES !!! not just any guys who sort of dislike each other not guys who argue with each other….jon/theon is not enemies to lovers bc one party negged the other and the second party called the first party an extremely mild swear and gave him the stink eye. rather it is — ideally — “guys who grew up in a small town and had slim pickings for people to hang out with and spent a lot of time around a guy they found very annoying” to “the last guy you know from your old life left alive so you guess you’re kind of ride or die now”. it’s this

to lovers. at best. it IS bitch4bitch but that’s a whole different trope. easy mistake to make perhaps. anyway the whole centerpiece of the jon/theon Thing (2 Me) is jon being the only character in the entire series to ever express disbelief about theon killing bran and rickon…did Theon Would Never Do That mean nothing to you. enemies indeed … i say thee nay. they have something way odder and more ambivalent going on and i hope they have a deeply tense and uncomfortable reunion in winds. broken men the wights are not the only sort of living dead etc. thank you

[fumifooms]

Spoilers for Fire & Blood/HOTD. Theory, Aegon & Larys & Alicent-related

There have been a lot of theories about Aegon’s death. Of course, Larys is involved one way or another, but it has been theorized that Alicent could be involved as well, either simply being aware of Larys’ plans and allowing it, being the one to prompt Larys to kill him, or straight up orchestrating his death herself, in all cases Larys willingly taking the fall for it. I thought of another variant, however…

As per my dinner scene analysis, realizing that Alicent would exile her child if they dishonored the crown, aka emotionally distance herself from a situation and cut ties to do what is “just”, is what makes Larys’ interest in her deepen, makes their relationship shift so strongly yet subtly when he causes the fire of Harrenhal. With killing his family, he shows her that he, too, could look beyond his attachment to the people in his life, his family, kinslaying, if it were what the crown demanded. In that moment he tells Alicent that “she will know how to reward him, when the time is right”… By doing the same thing herself later on.

Because in that moment Alicent stating she would harshly but duly punish her child if the situation required it bears a lot of weight, both of them in that scene take it seriously and as truth. However, in the latter half of second one, we see Alicent fail in that prospect. She is extremely upset with his raping and daily frustrated and disappointed at his frivolous and undignified behavior and activities, but when push comes to shove… She gives him a marriage with his sister, she gives him the crown. She still cares for him, still puts his life above hers as she places herself between him and the dragon. That doesn’t feel to me like someone who would exile him, even if he were to deserve it and it was needed, not without push and conflicted and upset feelings, anyways. Which finally brings me to my theory:

Alicent will be in on it, but only reluctantly, after Larys talks her into it. That is when he brings in her debt to him, and he would call what he’s asking of her an equal pay. Kinslaying for kinslaying. She’d be crying and he’d be softly walking her through the logic of it, doing it for the kingdom blabla, all while repeating her old words back at her. Poetic parallelism and callback. Recalling her sturdy moral stance of severing ties with her child if it was needed, the almost promise-like way it was stated with. “She’ll know the time is right to reward him”, indeed, it feels like the right and only time for such a grave debt to be repaid. She eventually relents and helps/he obtains her support, even if it is just in passivity. With all the horrors that the war and his reign brought on, like Helaena’s death, it’s not hard to imagine how Alicent could end up agreeing that it’s for the best. Its use could just be in getting the occasion or way to approach him conveniently and set his poisoning all up. Maybe she’s the one to give the wine bottle to him, his favorite kind, in an effort to soften his death, wanting to make dying sweeter on her child in a last show of affection and weakness.  So yeah, really simple, but I hadn’t seen the take “Alicent is in the plan to kill Aegon but reluctantly and Larys had to talk her into it” yet.

I find this especially plausible because of how that means he viewed his relationship with Alicent. When she says she wouldn’t let her judgement be clouded is really when Larys stops acting as much around her, immediately his attitude shift, then he shows her his secret horrific acts and shares his unusual unsettling ideology, everything in the Driftmark ep, etc. Once he has this new tidbit of information about her, he abandons himself to her, and I find that very interesting. Of course, he already had his plans and uses for her, but that statement of hers, that showing a similar ideology, makes him see more options, realizes that she will make for an even better asset than he previously thought. She could become a much more direct ally and agent in his plans, not only indirectly having a hand in his schemes through her support and ressources but through her own acts in tandem with his will. He has less manipulation to do because she already shares the groundwork ideology that will be helpful to him. But in the same beat, it opens the door for him to have more true, deeper relationship with her and so, manipulates her more in a way. He doesn’t have to choose between his affection for her or his plan; she is part of that plan. I think he’d be the kind to blur personal and professional relationship like that if she were to become more innately tied in to his plans, he’d feel less restricted, more comfortable that the plan won’t derail, lets himself love her more and deepen their personal relationship. Hence why he guards his behavior less and shows his desire for her openly. It becomes a long game in a different way than it was. The fire of Harrenhal wasn’t something he had planned previously, not “for her benefit” like this anyways, so it still goes to show that his plan does change suddenly sometimes and he adapts to it; he hadn’t planned to let Alicent in on his darker facets up until then, but it made sense to him to show himself to her then and now it changed things. In summary, she’s an investment, his business and his loving behavior coexist without interfering with each other, and the realization that he doesn’t have to fear such interference from her is what makes him so simpy for her. Excited for her aiding him in the future, even. Sorry for the word vomit above, I lost this whole theory post once and I forgot how to phrase it well… Or, maybe Alicent does end up being the one to ask Larys to kill him, but in that case it’d be a result of the corruption arc she went through with his guidance being fruitful. So, still a result of his investment in that way, accomplishing the same concept for the Larys relationship dynamic I am thinking of.

The flower bears its fruits.

[fervency-if]

The last ask is fun! Oh Please Elan, don't mind me you can undress all you want~ I would happily enjoy the view, if you didn't mind of course. I'm sure your figure is more than just regular, with all that well built muscle of yours hehehe~. Ehem anyway... now I'm wondering how the ROs are in Summer? I live on the equator with only 2 seasons so I don't know much but days last longer in summer right? and with their "anemic" condition I believe it would be uncomfortable. Also aww~ our poor delicate flower, unfortunately air conditioner has not been invented yet in the story, I don't mind fanning him! (as long as he doesn't munch on me, of course :p)

It was - and this message is, too, so charming! He wouldn't mind you enjoying the view, so you can look all you want... but he would be confused at first. Wait, is something stuck to him? Or what is the matter? It would take time for him to get used to the fact that someone would find his (definitely more built and muscular than average) body attractive, and not just 'a random body!' But he will be happy...

Also, you may fan our poor, delicate flower - he would love that, the spoiled little boy, hehe! I will tell him not to munch on you, that it's absolutely forbidden. I'm basically his spiritual father, after all, having created him, so he needs to listen to me now and then...

You're correct, yes - days definitely last longer! (The timing of this ask is funny, because I just reacted to the fact that it's starting to get dark so early around here now...) So summer is not a good time at all for the poor characters and their anemic condition; warm days can be an absolute pain since their skin must be fully protected with sleeves and gloves and such if they go out... It's hard to enjoy it fully, and annoying to have so few hours when one can be outside all safely. So, as for your question about how the love interests are in the summer:

The Physician has adapted well. She isn't too sensitive to heat, and usually doesn't mind it too much, unless it's very hot. It can be annoying to have to be that covered and shaded at all times though, so she definitely prefers to be out during the night even so.

Aubrey will definitely be uncomfortable, the delicate flower. He's quite whiny and dramatic when he feels miserable, too. Dying, etc. He was like that before, and he will be even worse now. At least he always liked the summer nights, then the temperature is right.

Vesa isn't extremely outdoorsy, so she's doing quite alright. She can be somewhat sensitive to heat - not extremely, but a tad. She doesn't complain too much, she's quite used to it. An annoyance, but not much more than that.

Narciso wants to complain, but he doesn't really, feeling that it would be most undignified... But he's definitely annoyed! All sticky and not at all fresh. He isn't too happy. He was always one to cover himself up quite a bit, but as an anemiac, it feels extremely exaggerated to him.

Roswhen will be somewhat miserable, certainly. It would feel sticky and unnatural walking around wearing gloves during the heat, so they would definitely want to stay indoors - which is a shame, they think. They love the beauty of summer days and such, being a wanderer and an outdoorsy person.

Elan actually talks about this with main characters wearing the star mask if they hang out with him and tell him that they love the night. He says: Summer will be a damn annoyance. I like relaxing outdoors with nothing on my upper body, but that isn't anything I can do again during daylight hours. So yes, it will probably be a 'damn annoyance,' but nothing he can't handle. He will definitely sorely miss going for swims to cool himself down during daytime, though.

[muirmarie]

(maybe i will actually end up writing this idk idk)

8. spock absolutely appalled at the way that mccoy - when making said self-sacrificial choice mentioned above - decides and starts the action w/in a span of SECONDS, so spock barely stops him in time. no thinking it through, no weighing pros and cons, just evaluation-decision-action in 2 seconds flat

[9-16 under the read-more]

9. mccoy, meanwhile, is slowly losing his mind at the way spock considers EVERYTHING, and has begun forcefully just ordering spock's food for him/etc, so that he doesn't have to hear spock weigh the pros and cons of everything. he can feel/hear what spock ACTUALLY wants, and if it undercuts the decision-making process, all the better. spock, unfortunately, finds this extremely endearing, and lets it stand, much to the side-eyeing of the rest of the crew

10. intrusive thoughts, my narrative choice beloved

11. someone is mean to spock and spock is just. hmm. absolutely not worth my time. but excuse me because i need to drag my doctor away because the boiling rage i can hear inside of him is about to spill out and ruin any/all chances of a diplomatic resolution.

12. someone is mean to mccoy and mccoy, who'd normally be irritated, ends up ignoring it entirely, because while spock is just standing there calmly attempting to redirect the conversation, all mccoy can hear is the roiling anger beneath his staid exterior, along with his embarrassment @ knowing mccoy can hear it

13. there's communication issues w/ the landing party (mccoy and kirk planetside, spock on the enterprise), and they're of course in mortal danger, so kirk's immediately, "can you think loudly at mr. spock, dr. mccoy?" and mccoy rolls his eyes and immediately does so, and then stiffens and freezes in place for a long minute, and kirk waits him out for a moment, and then puts his hand on mccoy's shoulder and says, "bones? you get through?" and mccoy blinks and kind of comes back to himself, and says, "oh, yeah, yeah he's going to start working on it," and kirk nods, and then, after making sure no one else can hear them, says, "seemed like you were kind of overwhelmed there, for a minute," because he knows. he knows that spock must be worried about them. and bones knows that jim knows that spock must be worried about them. and oh, it's a wonder, isn't it, when jim watches mccoy look at him, and then force a smile, and lie right through his teeth to protect spock. "don't worry, jim, he was just telling me to calm down."

14. if mcspirk, kirk kissing some extremely foxy lady, and both mccoy's and spock's thoughts doing simultaneous red alarm noises of jealousy, and they both very determinedly ignore that and do not so much as look at each other

15. due to [explosion], spock's console sparking, and causing a (minor) burn to his hand, and mccoy's immediately storming over and grabbing spock's hand and holding it in both of his to examine it, and then immediately hearing spock's Very Loud thoughts about mccoy holding spock's hand in his, and mccoy Very Deliberately trying to shut them out and focus solely on spock's injury, even as he can hear spock trying (and failing) to redirect his thoughts, and even as he can feel kirk's smirking gaze from across the room. the back of mccoy's neck is bright red, and realizing he's been quiet too long, all he says, desperately grasping for something to satisfy their audience, is "you can stop complaining, spock, i may be a hack but - " and spock cuts him off, and says, quietly, but still loud enough for the bridge crew to hear, "you know very well that i think highly of your medical expertise, doctor," and then mccoy's face flushes, as well, and he doesn't say one more word until spock's fixed up and mccoy can make an undignified retreat off the bridge.

16. deeply unfortunately for mccoy, spock makes a snide remark about how mccoy is always talking about his ears, and mccoy starts desperately thinking please don't think about how they're hot please don't think about how they're - sonuvabitch he can hear this right now, and spock swallowing, nodding at jim, and then walking straight out of the room, as everyone else looks on, confused.

spock/mccoy(/kirk?) where bc ~space shenanigans~ they can hear each others thoughts, but both of them genuinely think such nice things about each other that they literally Cannot address it, not even to tease the other about it, because they know the other person can feel how fond THEIR thoughts are, too, so they just calmly and deliberately - without ever talking about it - lie to everyone else about how they're bickering even in their thoughts

(kirk just looks at them with a smile and a glint in his eye, but he's an incredibly nice person (as he tells them later at length) and doesn't call them out on it in public)

scotty, with a smirk: you getting a headache from all his criticizing, dr. mccoy?

mccoy, trying to tune out with every fiber of his being the sound of spock warmly considering how well mccoy is handling this, and how if there's any doctor who will figure it out, he'll be the one, as he is indeed the finest doctor spock has ever known: HAHA YEP IT'S A REAL NIGHTMARE UP HERE!!!!

kirk, with that glint in his eye: and you, mr. spock? how are you dealing with the introduction of so much irrationality?

spock, mere seconds away from making up a reason to run to his room and try to meditate away the sound of mccoy's own extremely warm thoughts about what a skilled science officer spock is, and how if he had to have this happen with anyone at least it was someone he respects so much: dr. mccoy rarely keeps his thoughts to himself, so this is not such a change, captain.

kirk: mmhmmmmm i bet

[lollytea]

Deeply sorry for disturbing the Queen is dead fest🎉

But huntlow brainrot knows no time or place

One of things i like to imagine about them is how meanwhile both of them are aware of their feelings (not that the other likes-likes them but they do notice the affection directed at them) But due to circumstances they decide to stop thinking about it now, there are more important stuff!!

But the thing is both are extreme losers so each time they tell themselves "this is something i d do for each of my friends!" It very much is not

And thus Hunter reads many books about plant life (while daydreaming of discussing it and amazing willow with his knowledge), almost always takes the place next to willow if there s chance

And willow is very affectionate (shoulder touching/grabing hand when she s excited to show something etc), bringing snacks she knows he enjoys to their gravesfield history studies)

YEAH!!!!

This reminded me of something I think is really funny but don't see that much of in huntlow content. Willow being a complete loser for Hunter but like. Reluctantly? Melting against her will? Knowing she's being so very silly right now but unable to stop it?

Like when it comes to Lumity, Luz and Amity were already HUGE romantics even before they started dating so when mutual crush began, they dove the fuck in at full throttle.

But I like to imagine that Willow and Hunter just were not like that to begin with. They really ARE huge no nonsense "I need to focus on more important things" kind of people. (And maybe, just maybe, once they become a little more aware of their crush on each other, focusing on more important things also becomes somewhat of an excuse. Cuz feelings like this are unfamiliar territory and they're scared of tackling it head-on.)

Willow might have poured over romance novels when she was little but I see it as something she stopped doing as she got older and she deemed it "silly." (Let's not get into how part of the reason for that might have been her diminishing self worth and feeling like she can never be loved in that way or we'll be here all day.)

I could see her watching pre-relationship Luz and Amity being blushing messes around each other and trying to convince herself she is way too mature to ever behave like that. She's thinking "Could never be me. If I liked somebody, I would simply not be obvious about it."

Actually ma'am you are incorrect.

Hunter too. Like scouts being annoying about their crushes while on a mission and Hunter rolling his eyes like "There is no way a single person on the Boiling Isles could ever make me act so undignified."

ACTUALLY SIR YOU ARE INCORRECT.

And now they're both kinda kicking themselves for how they're feeling and how their brains are practically soup rn.

But it's FINE they're FINE, they're both just like "Nobody needs to know. I can hide it. I can totally hide it. I will be so good at hiding it."

Hunter most definitely is not good at hiding it, but he thinks he is. Yes, he is Willow's friend so of course he wants to do things that make her happy. So obviously he's gonna memorise passages from the encyclopedia chapter on her favourite carnivorous plants so he can recite them casually during conversation and her eyes will light up with delight and she'll burst into babbling about it. And he'll be able to keep up with her and impress her with how much info he's soaked up. This is a normal friend thing. He's a good friend, get off his back.

Willow is very touchy and affectionate with all her friends so she's a little bit more subtle. Patting his shoulder, hugs, linking arms with him, holding his hands. These are all things she does with Luz, Gus and Amity so it's not all that weird. But she gets so comfortable with the freedom of touching him ("Nobody's gonna know.") that she begins getting carried away and taking it much further than she does with her other friends. Miss Park why did you just cup Hunter's cheeks in your hands and smile at him like he holds the moon? Why did you say "Hi Hunter 💘" so very softly? Why did you take his hands in yours and then gently stroke your thumb across his skin? Why did you stand up on your tiptoes to thread your fingers through his hair because "wow it's kinda messy. Let me fix it for ya." Miss Park?? Miss Park get back here I want answers.

Anyway as time goes on, Willow gets a little lost in the sauce when it comes to her affection for Hunter. But it makes her so dopey that she just?? Doesn't notice she's doing it?? So she's so convinced that's shes being so low-key about her crush on him and nobody is the wiser.

She's definitely trying very hard to keep her crush in her head and not to let it leak out into the real world. Because, again, she's pretty adverse to schmaltzy stuff because it's a kind of weakness she doesn't want to reveal. But now she's out here getting absorbed in her thoughts and when she comes back to reality she's written Hunter's name all over her notebook and she's just like "FUCK!! SHIT!! FUCK!!"

Hunter, meanwhile, is going through the photos the group has taken while in the Human Realm and he finds one of just Willow alone sitting on a swingset and grinning at the camera. And he thinks to himself "I could...I could hold on to this." Which just sends him crashing back to the memory of that one scout he knew who talked about keeping a photo of his girlfriend under his pillow. And Hunter's skin nearly melts off from the fiery heat of his blush. FUCK!! SHIT!! FUCK!! He really is no better is he? He's gotta get this under control or she's gonna find out.

Basically Willow and Hunter being like "I am being SO normal right now" while literally bursting at the seams. Miss Park, we see you twirling your hair, Mr Hunter we see you fuckinf giggling. Please for the love of God get a hold of yourselves.

[ausp-ice]

Considering how many of my characters have considerable gravitas, I suppose it was only a matter of time. I also have a voice sample for them here! The effects make it a bit unintelligible, but they're saying "A hush settles upon you, a heavy silence in the air." Owner: Me TH Profile Name: Solem Idea: Gravitas Gender: None Pronouns: any Masterlist: #217 Edeia Website | Edeia Discord | Personal Website

About Solem is a very serious and dignified individual. They bring with them a heaviness in the air, a degree of solemnity and weight with every word they speak. They move with grace and deliberation, each movement carrying a weight of intention. They enjoy their solitude, but will occasionally seek out conversations with others. They will often pay their respects to those they hold in high regard.

Solem is very respectful to others and is open to speaking/interacting with all at least once. They also do not hold grudges, really, in that they won't direct malice towards another but will respectfully make their opinion of the other very clear if it is necessary. They have very low tolerance for undignified behavior, irreverence, troublemaking, disrespect, and many other "shenanigans." They do not hesitate to express their disdain for those who do not give the dignity a situation requires.

They care not if an individual is chaotic outside of interactions with them, but they will only continue to converse with those who maintain a degree of dignity and respect. If they are met with evasions, jokes, lies, disrespect, etc. they will end the conversation right there, tell the other the reason, and leave. Abilities Solemn Presence: Those around Solem can feel the weight of their presence. Instinctively, they will understand the gravity of Solem's presence, and the magnitude of disrespect any shenanigans would result in.

Aura of Gravitas: Solem will often be present for situations requiring solemnity and dignity. Those around them will be able to instinctively understand the true weight of the situation and the dignity that is suitable for it. They will also experience a slight compulsion to behave in a way that befits the situation. For instance, if Solem is present at a funeral, others present will understand the loss that has occurred and how they should behave in a way that respects the gravity of the situation.

Weight of Actions: Solem can access the memories of others (mundane individuals more easily than other Edeia) and understand the gravity of their actions. They can comprehend the long-reaching good or bad effects a small act may have resulted in; for instance, they can pick out a memory of an individual supporting their friend in a moment of crisis, and know that those words are what gave them strength to live on and fulfill their dreams. They can answer the question, "was it my fault?" when an individual had a moment of cruelty to a close friend, after which that friend went down a miserable and unfortunate path.

They can do this with individual memories, many at once, or for the culmination of one's life. Many have been reduced to tears at the weight of truly understanding what impacts they have made on others and the world, whether good or bad. Some may be changed by the revelation that the "good" they thought they were doing only harmed others.

Story Solem is extremely old, present in the earlier ages of magic. They remember their past, who they once were - a human who saw much death and misery and their life. They were told often that they were too young to understand some things, but they did, and soon others they spent time with understood that as well.

They were most bothered by those who could not treat others with dignity and respect, and this eventually led to them using their fledgeling powers on others - shocking them with the realization of the weight of their actions. Their community came to realize that they were magic, and treated them like some sort of incarnated god on Earth, pleading to them with wishes of happiness and health, and giving them offerings. They turned most of them down when they knew they could not help, but when their powers could change something, they would act.

They grew up with the dignity of a god, and one night, they felt a pull. They followed the pull and shortly met Ritual, who introduced themself as another "god." Ritual told them that they could sense their potential as another god and, in a sense, invited them to ascend.

Solem did instinctively understand to some extent that they could leave behind their humanity. But they said, "Not yet," and respectfully parted ways to return to their home. There, they made preparations. They bid farewells to those they had care for, tied up their loose ends... and then one night, they left. In solitude, they Actualized.

They met Ritual - though this time as Rial and Tial - shortly after their Actualization. They wandered the world together for a time, learning about each other and their "godly natures." In time, they parted to seek out their own ends separately, though they still remain in contact.

Solem wandered the world, often invisibly standing present at solemn processions, and occasionally enlightening individuals of the weights of their actions. Legends of them persisted, though were fairly uncommon; still, if they encountered one who prayed to them, they would assist as much they could.

As the ages progressed to secrecy and then reunion, Solem's habits changed very little. They now continue to wander, a solemn presence that appears in situations of gravitas.

[holdoncallfailed]

could you maybe explain why battery in your leg is abt graham? thank u!

ermmmm well. i'll put this under a read more actually so i don't look like a total freak lol

anyway looking at the lyrics

i think it's pretty clear that the song is about graham's impending departure from the band—ultimately it was damon (and dave and alex, ostensibly) who made the decision to basically fire graham but i don't think that damon was happy about having to do that. i think he very much wanted to make things work with graham in the band and tried for years to overlook/accommodate graham's alcohol abuse but it was too destructive to damon's work ethic which is/was ultimately the most important thing to him. so the second verse is alluding to the concessions that damon felt he made on graham's behalf throughout their whole relationship/career together. graham had been going to a recovery program (allegedly) when they first started recording think tank but apparently it wasn't working well enough for damon, who was not known for being particularly empathetic towards addicts (i think he was particularly frustrated because graham had previously very publicly tried to get sober in 1996-97 during the recording of their self-titled album and the subsequent press/tour but had obviously relapsed in the process of recording 13 in 1998). (maybe worth also noting that supposedly justine frischmann, damon's ex girlfriend, was a pretty heavy heroin user and that had contributed to their breakup in 1998 as well as the stalling of justine's own career with her band elastica. so it's possible that damon felt that he was losing his other best friend/creative collaborator/lover/whatever to addiction all over again pretty soon after he and justine had split.)

the first verse/"the ballad for the good times" is referring to their long history together, their childhood...the "put a rock beat over anything" i think is a reference to the difference between damon and graham's sound, and graham's preference for noisier american indie music which damon was initially really resistant to but ultimately moved towards with self-titled and 13. the "don't get het up on the evil things" is probably referring to graham's lifelong experience with depression/his sensitivity to criticism. "the dignity we had" well....idk about that one lol cos blur's image had been extremely uh messy for lack of a better word from the beginning of their career so i'm not sure 'dignified' was ever a word used to describe them. but i guess their low points had been pretty public and very undignified compared to the purposeful wackiness of their early performances, so...

BASICALLY "you can be with me if you want to be" is damon's plea for graham to get better for his own sake and for the sake of the band while simultaneously knowing that there was no way to force him to do so. it's a very sad and desperate song that i think is also simultaneously resigned to the knowledge that this wasn't actually going to work in the end, that graham was going to have to leave the band in order to recover and for blur to continue to function as a group and that damon had to be the one to make that call (but, interestingly, not the person to actually tell graham—their manager delivered that message lol yikes and then damon and graham didn’t talk to each other at all for like eight years). it's also the only song on that record that features graham's guitar playing.

the phrase 'battery in your leg' is weird and likely just one of damon's nonsense lyrics but it also calls to mind the spanish phrase ponte las pilas (literally 'put the batteries in') which is used to tell someone to keep going, look alive, get a move on, etc. i legitimately have no idea if damon had any familiarity with this phrase—i was surprised when i listened to the song for the first time cos i assumed that's what he was referencing cos it's such a specific turn of phrase but really who knows. if he was aware of the meaning then i think that would be another message to graham urging him to keep going/make it through this period of his life.

[i-cant-believe-i-wrote-this]

Review : The Trial by Franz Kafka (1/2)

So I recently read The Trial by Franz Kafka, which was published after his death, in 1925. It was very interesting and thought-provoking, and I'd love to share my findings with you.

Interesting things I noticed:

1. Symbolism of the attic - the mysterious Law Court Offices, where the secret details of the court cases remain, are in the attic; I believe it is symbolic of how their procedures and judgements are hidden and unreachable (thus high up in a building), but also encompasses Kafka's satire of how they are undignified and illegitimate in a moral sense (thus they are cramped in small rooms such as attics). However, the quote "There are court offices in almost every attic" also shows its omnipresence and "constant surveillance".

2. The stuffy air of the Law Court Offices - the air in the Law Court Offices are "stuffy", "heavy", "hardly breathable" and "oppressive"; it makes someone want to faint. It causes Josef to feel dizzy and lose clarity of thought and perception. I believe this enhances the drama and sense of surrealism that envelopes the entire book, exemplifying the mystery of the Court as Josef cannot take in his surroundings and foreshadowing Josef's death (defeat by the Court) in the end.

3. Josef K.'s last name - the full spelling of Josef's last name is never revealed. Why?

4. Is Josef guilty? - we never know if Josef is actually guilty (although the Court certainly thinks so), and if so, what he is guilty of. I will explore this issue later.

5. Why are the investigations done so loosely/casually? - the Court is extremely accommodating in scheduling interrogations, giving its suspects personal freedom etc., but why? Is it due to magnanimity, or is it (as I believe) that the suspect's entire life - in and out of the Court's procedures - are all part of the investigation?

Themes

The Kafkaesque

Apparently, there has been some discussion to what "Kafkaesque" means. I quite like one definition by Frederick Karl, who says it is when "we view life as somehow overpowering or trapping us, as in some way undermining our will to live as we wish."

This is achieved in a way by the 3rd person limited narrator, who vividly shows Josef's confusion of the trial starting from the beginning. The idea of the "interrogative, incomplete and unanswered" is left as it is, as the mysteries of the people associated with the trial are never revealed.

Totalitarianism and Bureaucracy

The Trial is often described to show an "ordinary person’s struggle against an unreasoning and unreasonable authority", and is seen to represent society under totalitarianism. Its themes also fall under the term "the banality of evil" coined by Hannah Arendt, which describes the situation when "evil acts are not always carried out by ‘evil’ people, but are sometimes the result of bureaucrats who are dutifully following orders". For example, the supervisor tells Josef in Chapter 1 that "I cannot inform you that you have been charged with anything or, rather, I do not know whether you have been or not". The presence of the bureaucracy is present in both the Court and Josef's bank: most people within these organisations are "named by position only, the bank director, the Court magistrate" etc, suggesting that "power resides in the positions themselves and not in the individuals holding those positions". Furthermore, the confusing, never-ending bureaucratic procedures drag on indefinitely, as the painter Titorelli says, "The trial has to be kept going round and round in the little circle to which it is restricted". It cannot "end"; it must go "round and round". Also, it is noted that genuine acquittal, which would "effectively end court proceedings, is unheard of".

Is Josef guilty?

There have been different interpretations as to whether Josef is guilty, and if so, what he is guilty of. One interpretation says that his crime is that "he does not accept his own humanity", which is "gradually and implicitly apparent" throughout the book. Josef's denial of his guilt is representative of him denying his humanity, and "if he would only accept the guilt inherent in being human...both he and the Law could move on." Interestingly, this idea parallels the Christian concept that all humans inherit sin at birth due to the Original Sin. The interpretation says that this is important as The Trial may have taken place in "an increasingly Christian nationalist Germany", where such ideology was embedded "at least on a subconscious level".

A second interpretation is that Josef's execution is because he was "already dead inwardly at his arrest". He does not "love anybody or anything", does not have aspirations beyond his "immediate physical needs", and is "insensitive and egotistical." But as the trial carries on his "self-assurance and defiance" fade, and he realises that the Court "may have the right to investigate against him after all". As Josef realises his guilt he is executed; and thus the Court is a reflection of [his] inner condition."

I personally believe he is not guilty; at least, he hasn't done anything the current legal system would define as "illegal". However, I don't think the question of whether Josef is guilty is of significance in the book - no matter what Josef believes, or we believe, or what happened, he will still be subject to trial and punishment. The Court in this book, with its confusing hierarchy, corrupted individuals and elaborative bureaucracy, isn't made to make effective, precise decisions on whether its suspects are guilty, but to wear down and punish. This fits in with the fact that genuine acquittal has never been achieved by anyone - you can't wake someone who is pretending to sleep.

Gender

I noticed that many of the female characters in the book are minor, and subject to Josef's desires. Similarly, many Feminists have regarded the book as a "deeply misogynistic novel, meaning that Kafka’s gender affected or jeopardised his ability to write." However, I found an interpretation that suggests otherwise, that such a portrayal contributes to the thematic idea of power in the book.

This interpretation argues that sexuality is a "second and parallel thematic line" to the main theme of power by a ruling force - "arrester and arrested, kisser and kissed". There is no "equilibrium between human relations". In the relationships Josef has with women, he is, in most times, the dominant character; there is a "subtext of bondage and domination" in these relationships, so even though Josef is the victim of the bureaucracy, he is also a "collaborator in these games of power" in relation to the women he interacts with. Josef is both "an oppressor and an oppressed, making him neither the villain nor the victim, but an accomplice"; he "he has created his downfall, he has created his destiny." Thus, relating back to the topics mentioned above, Josef is part of what makes up the "banality of evil"; he is guilty, in the sense that he acts just like the Court.

References

https://www.britannica.com/topic/The-Trial-novel-by-Kafka

https://lareviewofbooks.org/article/door-alone-reading-kafkas-trial-self-isolation/

https://www.jstor.org/stable/1345282

https://interestingliterature.com/2021/07/franz-kafka-the-trial-summary-analysis/

https://www.123helpme.com/essay/Confronting-Guilt-In-Franz-Kafkas-The-Trial-168501

https://www.cliffsnotes.com/literature/t/the-trial/critical-essays/on-ks-guilt-the-court-and-the-law

https://zizekstudies.org/index.php/IJZS/article/download/1153/1188#:~:text=In%20The%20Trial%2C%20the%20bureaucracy,defendants%20such%20as%20Josef%20K.

https://thisisntablogoranything.wordpress.com/2016/11/08/what-lies-behind-the-theme-of-sexuality-in-kafkas-the-trial/

[forbidden-sorcery]

The fallacies of collectivist thinking are endless, but the largest problems, which collectivists always abstain from directly addressing, is the very largeness of their schemes (the emphasis on size and the reverence for quantity are typical collectivist traits). For example, though Communism or Socialism might be possible (and even enjoyable) as an intentional communal experiment, it becomes quite another question when it's a case of forcibly applying it to millions and millions of people, who share neither the same "internationalist" vision (programmed toward ultimate merging and globality), nor the same interests or desires, nor the same ideas on life. Collectivism on that scale implies coerced egalitarianism, as an ideal mass is homogenous and consists therefore of "equal" atoms, but unnaturalness (brutal force is not only necessary for the "levelling" process in the initial stage - it becomes mandatory as a permanent feature in order to maintain the abstract and inorganic "symmetrical order"). More to the point, the establishment of such all-embracing "equality" requires a complicated technocratic police-state infrastructure and demands an endless numbers of laws, regulations, restrictions, and controls which in turn comprise a pagoda of slavery, of quasi-military rule, of constant social supervision and peremptory institutional regimentation that feeds, nourishes, and allegedly "protects" the subject population. Collectivist ideology finds fertile ground in the minds of those who lack in self-assertion and are deficient in ego-consciousness, i.e., those who feel a need for personal anchorage to some system of group identity and who view other humans as primarily members of one herd or another (a nation, a class, a society, etc.), believing that individuals are only complete when coupled to a huge organized structure where the particular is defined by the whole. These mass-minded weaklings know that their real strength doesn't lie in their own personalities but in their numbers, for numbers indicate social authority and certitude. The collectivist's insatiable need for company, for fraternity, for brotherhood, is reflective of agonizing personal insecurities, but is positively degrading and undignified to an anarchist, whose outlook starts with the "I" and not the "We", and who understands that there is no common denominator for all individuals (the fiction on which collectivists rest their case). In fact, this is one of the main characteristics which sets anarchism apart from politics in general, but more specifically, from Leftism, and from the leftist rackets and organizations which are at the service of todays or tomorrow's rulers. Of course, there's always been branches of anarchist thought that have stressed the utterly erroneous notion of social solidarity and that have assumed to speak for some vast, vaguely defined constituency called "The People" (the typical representatives being the anemic writings of Kropotkin and Jean Grave), but these sentimental, wish-fulfilling fantasies are really only faltering steps towards the end goal of complete personal liberty, whereas the most radical demands put forth by individualist-anarchists imply the destruction of the very foundations of every possible "social" position, and are absolutely incapable of being used by collectivist planners.

Disruptive Elements: The Extremes of French Anarchism

[creampuffqueen]

Manon x Dorian baby heacanons

Introducing: witches!

-Manon and Dorian are, to say the least, an interesting couple

-They both have a TON of rebuilding to do after the war, so they're incredibly busy. They do see each other fairly frequently, though, as their countries border one another and Manon comes to train the wyverns.

-And whenever she's over in Adarlan, Dorian always meets her. Like always. Almost like he misses and cares about her or something.

-And we all know what these two get up to when they meet. We know what goes on in those bedrooms, closets, bathrooms, abandoned hallways, etc.

-But as Dorian's court, and his mother, return to the castle, people are pushing him to get married. His mother is flinging courtly ladies at him every other day.

-The witches don't care if Manon gets married, because it wouldn't matter anyway. A man that married into the royal bloodline could never be a witch king, unless he was an actual witch.

-But people in Adarlan want a queen.

-And Dorian is thinking about Manon all the time, he never stops thinking about her. He also thinks about what Yrene said when they parted, about them getting married.

-Finally when Manon comes to visit, Dorian decides to talk with her about it. She's slowly getting better at talking about her feelings, so she doesn't immediately slice Dorian in half when he suggests they talk.

-Dorian remembers her proposal, that night in the snow during the war. He knows she could never stand to be shackled to someone.

-So they talk about it

-And they come to the conclusion: They could stand to be married to each other.

-But the problem is that both are sole rulers of their countries. Manon has no heirs, nor does Dorian, and there's no way in hell he's letting Hollin have the throne.

-So they decide that they will be married. But they will live in their own countries and see each other as much as possible. That way they can still rule, but they will appease the people and themselves. And since they won't always be living together, Manon won't feel tied down.

-Dorian jokingly gets down on one knee to pop the question, Manon just rolls her eyes, says "yes" and hauls him to his feet before shutting him up with a kiss.

-They announce it right before she leaves, and Dorian is surprised his mother doesn't faint with the shock.

-Dorian decides to go with Manon to the wastes to announce it, and nobody there is surprised. Like at all. Glennis just grins at him, and the rest of the witches are like "congrats. Let's eat".

-The wedding is a quiet affair. They invite their friends and family, and it's a quick ceremony. Manon wears her flying leathers and strides down the isle with Abraxos at her side.

-Despite the simplicity, it's a good wedding, and Manon feels happy for the first time in ages.

-For the first six months they hardly leave each other's sides. They alternate between the Wastes and Adarlan. It's great. After six months they separate just a little, like Dorian going back to the palace for a while, and Manon stays in the Wastes. They still prefer to be together, though.

-After Yrene, Aelin, and Elide start popping out children left and right, Manon and Dorian are like "oh yeah, we should probably do that soon."

-Honestly they're the most chill couple out there. They have a chill talk about the whole heir situation, and decide this:

-They need two heirs, one for each kingdom. As a man Dorian can have kids for like seventy more years to come, but they want to have some while he's still young, and they want to have some near the age of the other kids they'll inevitably be hanging out with.

-So they try for a baby.

-With Manon's Crochan blood and Dorian's magic, they conceive quickly.

-With how busy they've been, Manon hasn't had much time to dwell on the past. But when she finds out she's expecting it all comes rushing back. Asterin would have been so happy for her. All of the Thirteen would have been so happy for her.

-Her pregnancy is fairly easy, compared to some. She's mostly just very emotional, and it's annoying because she has to keep up a badass reputation with her subjects.

-Dorian is so on top of things, he just wants her to be safe. Manon is conflicted between letting herself be cooped up, as is the witch custom, or just going on normally. She decides to act normal around everyone except Dorian, who is the only person she will allow to bundle her up and keep her confined.

-Dorian is so so excited to be a dad, he's already a bomb uncle to little Amelie and Rygan, and he adores all the other kids he's around. But deep down he's super super worried, because his dad was an asshole and what if he ends up like him?

-Manon is sick of being pregnant when she's like five months in. Because people are treating her differently, even Dorian, acting like she's fragile. And she's not fragile, but at the same time she's scared that she is because she grew up hearing the horror stories of witch birthings. But Crochans have it easier, they often have multiple children, so she hopes she can make it through.

-Yrene offers to deliver the baby, which Manon is fine with. Even more fine with when she suddenly goes into labor about a month early.

-Its a good thing Yrene was at the castle with her husband and children for a small party (Celebrating Chaol's birthday)

-The baby comes fast, like, born in only a few hours fast.

-Manon holds her baby in the wee hours of the morning. The baby doesn't have the same birthday as Chaol.

-It's a girl, which Manon already knew. She knew she'd have a little witchling.

-Despite the fact that the baby was born early, Manon is perfectly fine.

-And despite the fact she was born early and is a little small, the baby is perfectly fine as well.

-The baby has shining black hair, like her father. But when she opens her eyes they are a burning gold like her mothers.

-They decide to wait a bit to name her. They want to know what her future will be.

-After some talking a bit of debate, they decide again. This couple has become very good at making decisions.

-This baby girl will be the Crown Princess of Adarlan. This is since Dorian is mortal, and he could die, at like, any time. In theory.

-He won't, but you know what I mean. Adarlan needs an heir before the Wastes do.

-Because she's Adarlan's princess, Manon hands over the naming to Dorian.

-He wonders aloud if its tasteless to name your baby after a dead lover. Manon shrugs and says "Aelin and Rowan have done it. Just name the gods damned baby"

-She is named Aris Sorscha Blackbeak Crochan-Havilliard. Her name rivals that of Lyria Nehemia Ashryver Whitethorn Galathynius.

-Aris is a good baby. A very good baby. She's always smiling and is sweet and very curious

-Surprisingly, Manon takes to motherhood very easily and naturally. At first whenever the baby cried she put her in bed with her and Dorian, but eventually she just gives up on the crib and they all co-sleep, which Manon later informs Dorian is something most witch mothers do. But she thought she wouldn't be able to stand having a baby in her bed, which is why she tried the crib.

-Dorian is a bomb dad. He never puts that child down, like, ever. Manon thinks it cute until she wants to hold the baby, then its annoying.

-They don't know if it's safe for a baby to travel by wyvern, so Manon rules her kingdom by messenger for about six months.

-Then she starts wyvern-training Aris

-She and Dorian take the baby to Abraxos, who falls in love with the babe at first sight. A few days later they take her on a small flight around a tower. Then around the garden, just over the top of the bushes. Then around the castle. Aris loves it, and she lets out little baby squeals and giggles.

-Being a witch, the air pressure doesn't bother her, and Manon watches her infant daughter flick down her third eyelid against the wind on instinct.

-They bring her to the Wastes, where everyone is happy to see them. There's an actual party for the homecoming of Aris, despite the fact the witches know she's not their heir.

-Glennis takes on her role of grandmother, or in this case, great-grandmother.

-Aris takes her first steps in the Wastes, as any proper witchling should. By this time its plain as day that she has Ironteeth blood. Whenever the baby gets excited she accidentally flicks out her iron teeth or nails.

-Her first birthday is celebrated in Adarlan, and she says her first word the same day. It's "dada"

-After her first birthday, Aris starts to show signs of her father's raw magic. Random objects will be thrown from the shelves whenever she throws a tantrum, gusts of wind blow through the nursery whenever she dreams, water will spurt from her bottle across the room, and other incidents occur.

-Aris is extremely curious, and she has a bit of a free spirit. She has a whole castle to roam and explore, and explore it she does. Dorian and Manon lose count of how many times they lose the baby.

-When she's about a year and three quarters, Manon suddenly gets a little bit of baby fever. She can't believe her daughter is almost two, and she longs for the days when she was just a wee babe in her arms, and not a squirming, magic witchling toddler. She loves her baby, but she can't believe how fast she's grown.

-She thinks its a bit undignified to feel like this, but she tells Dorian anyway. They decide to start thinking about another baby, an Heir for the Wastes.

-Well, thinking apparently leads to doing, because Manon finds out she's pregnant again about a month later.

-They tell Aris first, that she's going to be a big sister. She's so excited that the bedspread catches fire. Good thing they're used to things like that at this point and Dorian quickly puts it out and gets new sheets.

-Manon's second pregnancy isn't as emotional as it is nauseating. She's so sick, she can't hardly think about flying or else she'll puke. They're in the Wastes at this point, and Dorian has to return to Adarlan for an important meeting, and he doesn't want to leave Aris with Manon when her mother can hardly move without getting sick. So he takes the baby with him, and Aris is separated from her mother for the first time.

-She handles it surprisingly well, except for asking "wheres mommy" every ten minutes.

-Dorian spends as much time with his wife as he can while she's pregnant, but because the pregnancy is so rough he often has to take full charge of Aris, which usually means he has to leave Manon.

-It's upsetting, but it all works out in the end.

-The second Blackbeak Crochan-Havilliard girl is born in the middle of the afternoon, in the Witch Kingdom. Dorian had planned to bring Aris with him to stay with Manon in the final stretch of her pregnancy, but the baby comes early, while Dorian is still in Adarlan.

-Another witchling, with moon-white hair and sapphire eyes.

-Manon's heir, the Crown Princess of the Witch Kingdom

-Manon names her daughter Nysa Asterin

-She wishes she could name her daughter after all of the Thirteen, but that would be way too many names. So she settles for Asterin

-Right from the start, Nysa is a difficult baby. Unlike Aris, she is very fussy all the time and only quiets down if she's being held. After being separated from her family for so long Manon isn't going anywhere anytime soon, so she's fine with constantly holding a baby.

-Aris loves her baby sister, she always wants to hold her, but that makes Nysa cry, so then Aris gets upset and cries too.

-Nysa is wyvern-trained as well, and she loves it as much as her sister does.

-All of Nysa's firsts are in the Wastes. First steps, first words (Mama), first birthday. She goes to Adarlan as well, but she waits to have a first until she gets back to the Witch Kingdom

-Its right after Nysa's first birthday that Manon starts to feel funny. Like a, morning sickness funny.

-Oh

-They didn't plan for a third baby. They didn't plan for another baby at all. They had their heirs, their perfect and wonderful daughters, and that was all they needed.

-But, hey, it's happened, and there's no turning back now.

-So they tell their girls that they're getting another sister. Because Manon is sure that she's having another girl.

-This pregnancy isn't hard, like, at all. It's a breath of fresh air after the last one, especially since she has to look after two toddlers this time.

-And as usual, Manon is right. It's a baby girl.

-Her hair is white, like hers, but her eyes...

-One is bright gold. And the other is sparkling sapphire

-She's gorgeous

-They decide on her name together, because she technically is heir to both kingdoms.

-Her name is Kerrigan Rhiannon, along with her massive amount of last names.

-And holy gods, Kerrigan is a wild child.

-She walks and talks earlier than both her older sisters. By the time she's one and a half she's stringing together full sentences.

-And like both her sisters, she has both the iron nails and teeth, and raw magic. And she uses all her abilities to make trouble. Since she's not really a Crown Princess like her sisters, she gets away with a lot more and gets into way more trouble.

-When the girls are six, four, and three, Manon and Dorian decide to split them up and take them to their respective kingdoms. They see each other and visit often, but they spend a majority of their time with one parent. Except for Kerrigan, who hops between her parents nearly every time they visit.

-As the girls grow and their training gets more intense, both as warriors/magic wielders and princesses, they spend less and less time together.

-Of course, except for Kerrigan. She does what she wants. She has basic etiquette lessons and basic fighting lessons, but that's about it. Sometimes she requests more training, sometimes she doesn't.

-Manon and Dorian do their best to keep their children on good terms with each other, but it can be hard. Mostly between Aris and Nysa.

-The schedule for living with their parents is that they stay with one for nine months, and the other for three. Aris stays with Dorian for 9 and Manon 3, and Nysa has the opposite. And again. Kerrigan does what she wants.

-Some jealousy grows between the sisters, for getting to spend more time with one parent or whatever. Sometimes Kerrigan gets jealous that her sisters have such a structured life, and sometimes her sisters get jealous that she gets to do what she wants.

-As Aris gets older, she gets very bookish. She lives with Dorian for nine months of the year, so it's natural she loves reading. But she loves reading so much that she'll stay up late and be tired in the morning. Dorian, with a heavy heart, tells Aris that she can't read at night so she won't be tired. And Aris, naturally, doesn't listen, and instead reads by a single candle, or sometimes by moonlight. She does it so much she wrecks her eyesight.

-Nysa, living with witches for most of the year, is a lot more ruthless and bloodthirsty than her older sister is. She isn't raised to be a killing machine, like Manon was, but she's raised to be powerful.

-This difference in training creates a bit of a rift between Aris and Nysa, as Nysa believes her sister isn't using her full potential as a raw magic wielding witch when she spends so much time reading, and Aris thinks her sister is too bloodthirsty.

-However, they keep their arguments to themselves. So much, in fact, that their own parents don't know they don't get along

-When Nysa is ten, she begs Manon for a wyvern. And in this case, Manon relents to her children right away. She lets all three of them get a wyvern.

-She lets them each pick a hatchling and train it themselves. (Or really, train it themselves with quite a bit of help from Manon)

-And honestly it's the best feeling ever for Manon to be riding Abraxos through the clouds, with her daughters following behind her on their own wyverns and whooping to the skies.

-It's the best mother-daughter bonding moment possible. When they go off riding Dorian always conveniently has something to do. Really he just loves the idea of his wife and daughters all having bonding time together.

-For Dorian, the best bonding moments with his daughters differ for each. With Aris its either reading together or teaching her to do ballroom dances. With Nysa it's fencing and sparring. And with Kerrigan it's teaching her how to use her magic.

-They're a sight to see all together, five terrifying yet attractive people, all on wyverns.

-And even though they squabble and fight, they still all love each other.

-And that love is all Manon and Dorian could ever ask for.

The story Worlds of Fire and Darkness takes place when Aris is 18, Nysa is 16, and Kerrigan is 15

[canonicallyanxious]

okay i know you already did this for skamverse but now i want to know your top 5/10 characters in any media that you hc as trans/nb/etc?

that’s a really good question actually! i don’t know if i have that many trans hcs myself tbh but i’ll try to think of some for this ask:

Lardo Duan from check please - one of the first fics i remember reading with a nb interpretation of a character was exeunt pursued by heteronormativity which includes nb Lardo so this hc has a very special place in my heart, also viet nb representation would honestly be such a fucking dream

Katsa from Graceling - you absolutely cannot tell me Katsa from Graceling isn’t nonbinary i will fight you on this personally

Peter Donaldson from nothing much to do/lovely little losers - an extremely niche pull but i feel extremely strongly about peter being trans so what can you do

The Matrix - this is not a character but i just want to say this movie is trans. no i will not elaborate.

Danny Fenton from Danny Phantom - Danny as a trans guy just because i’ve seen that one floating around a lot and i’m 1000000% for this

Honorable mention: every Harry Potter character is trans and JKR can suck my entire ass [i couldn’t put HP on the official list bc unfortunately my love for this series died a painful and undignified death a while ago but, just so everyone knows, i am factually correct]

Ask me my top 5/10 anything!

[wilkoak]

I love Dio Brando. And here’s why:

It is, on the top layer, a purely executed example of a shitlord villain, who acts all cocky and mighty and extra whenever he’s plotting, doing his evil things, being a dick to people etc, relishing in his power, showing it off and daring to do the most upsetting, cruel and belittling things to his enemies and random people, because yes. Evil incarnate.

But at the same time whenever antyhing goes AGAINST him, he immediately looses his composture, panicking and reacting with a big amount of anxiety. And doing really undignifying things just to rescue his ass (fake crying, pretending friendship, jumping around as a flying head, groveling around on the steet to run away). Even after the timeskip in part 3, when we would expect him to be more confident.

His behaviour comes not from high self esteem, but from EXTREMALLY low self esteem - that connected with making up for it by being as extra as possible whenever there is a chance (first seeking money, then immortality, then power). Which is directly and completely sourced from having an extremally abusive childhood- being belittled, physically and mentally hurt, losing mother, all that pushing him into hatred so much that he kills his own parent. Araki doesnt show this in a way that makes us pity Dio, it’s really hard to sympathize with him - he simply shows how terrible treatment can twist someone from the bottom in unfixable way. And, he is not being thrown into the category “this villain had bad childhood now he crazy”, that is an easy route to cover up the behaviour depiction by crazy giggles and weird mannerisms. I mean, okay, he does some weird shit but still remains a logically thinking human. (Vampire.) 

When Jonathan shows his compassion in his final act, even then, Dio doesn’t have a change of heart - and it’s not just hate, but confusion - he can’t understand the love and empathy that Jonathan expresses, he was never taught to understand it. 

Compared to Kars for example (the only other villain from i know so far) - a typical “ancient evil” who is prideful, experienced with his power and sure of his superiority - Dio despite his shiny boots and hordes of minions remains an anxious rebellious mess he was when he arrived at the Joestar’s mansion.He’s like a rat scrambling and kicking and biting to survive.

I think that’s a very interesting and human approach to creating a “pitch-black-evil” villain in a believable way that utilises real mental handicaps that come from childhood trauma. And yes, we see those kind of characters, but its nice to see all the aspects of the behaviour shown explicitly on the screen. 

[ziracona]

Thinkin about how the NOES 2010 movie is so good. Listen…listen. It has really unusual structure. Most of the time, a horror film follows either a single unit (one person, one family) through a whole plot (The Witch, The Babadook, Saw, Halloween) or a group of victims with one pretty obvious final girl in the mix (Friday the 13th, Texas Chainsaw Massacre, I Know What You Did Last Summer), but NOES 2010 doesn’t do that. It takes you through several protagonists, one at a time, moving on from one teen to another when your initial protagonist is killed, starting with Dean, moving on to Kris, then Jesse, and then Nancy and Quentin when they’re the last two standing. It’s a fresh take, which makes everything so much less sure, and gives narrative weight to the characters who die instead of just making them bodycount. Everybody gets treated like the final girl, not canon fodder, which is extremely important to the story the film is telling. Nancy and Quentin don’t even become the film’s focus until almost halfway through the story.

Probably someone who is unfamiliar with the original film would assume Kris is the protagonist until she is killed thirty minutes in a little ala Psycho. It makes everything seem less certain, and makes the characters who you lose as important as the ones who make it, which is a really responsible way to tell something. A lot of the time, the characters in horror are kind of assholes (which is great and another rant for another day, because since the stakes are so low [literally you just have to care enough to not want the character to be brutally murdered], you can get an audience invested in an willing to explore the complexity of even a shitty  person—but like I said, that’s a wholeass other rant), but in NOES2010, they’re not, which I think is important. Never does the film want you to feel like the characters either suck and deserve something happening to them, or are stupid (look, when the publicist in Scream 4 got out of her car in an unlit parking garage in the middle of a Ghostface chase, I saw the wholeass theater stop cheering for her to live because she was so stupid we just couldn’t root for her anymore—it happens) and to care less about their outcome that way. Everyone fights hard and tries hard and it’s just not enough.

Obviously it’s a slasher, but NOES 2010 is really like a thesis work film on CSA and how it affects people, and the commentary is both responsible, and really, really well done. As someone who has had to write a character who has committed that kind of crime, and walk the fucking razor’s edge between making them duly awful, and not crossing the line into anything exploitative or gratuitous, I can say with certainty that is not an easy thing to do. Because you want to give weight to the suffering that has been inflicted and realistic portray of the depravity of your villain, but again, you really don’t want to show anything more than you have to. That’s not what it’s about, and honestly, you can talk about that kind of a serious issue without actually showing things on screen. A film about CSA would be kind of defeating its own purpose if anyone who had ever experienced that shit went to watch the movie and went away more traumatized. The film does a really responsible job of walking that line. Freddy is awful, and there’s a constant threat with him—especially in the film’s climax—but he never actually assaults anyone onscreen (or off, except in the referenced past. The worst thing he does onscreen is lick someone, which is still incredibly disgusting), and the film still manages to keep how awful he is very, very real.

CSA is a really shitty thing to go through, obvious, it feels incredibly of dumb to type that—any assault is. Obviously. One of the big things in dealing with it after is a lot of the time, victims can feel broken, or damaged, and even worse, be talked about like they’re some kind of ‘damaged goods’ by incredibly shitty people in their life, but the film doesn’t even give that enough weight to bring it up. There have always been two big ways in film to combat ideas, one of which is direct confrontation (IE a film specifically about something being wrong—Do The Right Thing talking very openly about racism for instance) and by just straight up not doing the thing (Star Trek dropping a woman of color in as both a major cast member, romantic interest for people of other races, and someone working in a position of power, and just being like Yup. This is just normal). Both of which are very necessary and useful approaches. In NOES 2010, all four of the protagonists are in romantic relationships at some point (and so is Dean, the mini-lead protag). It’s not played out voyeuristically, and you don’t get any hot makeout seshes, but they’re definitely in comfortable, functional, physical relationships. In a silent but fucking hardcore stance, while Kris and Jesse spend the night together early in the film, there is not a single on-screen kiss until Quentin and Nancy have found out the truth about what happened to them as kids, and a few minutes later, right before their final confrontation, they kiss. Not even a second thought about anything, except how much they really need and want to kill this piece of shit coming after them, as it should be. It’s a rockhard solidification that not only do the characters not see each other differently because of what happened, but it has done nothing to change who they are or what they can be.

The movie is only an hour and a half, which isn’t that long, but still manages to pack in not only multiple different realistic reactions, (Quentin goes through some hardcore withdrawl/denial after finding stuff out initially, Nancy gets fucking mad), but to cover some of what this is like for their parents. In one conversation with Alan, Quentin’s dad, he tries to explain the mob enacted justice on Krueger years ago by telling him that he hopes someday when he’s a parent, he never has to experience how it feels having utterly failed to protect your child. Even though they only have like thirty seconds of flashback to work with, the script gets in one of the parents in dismay asking what other choice they have about hunting Krueger down, because the alternative is making their three-four year olds get on a stand and tell a room full of strangers what happened to them. It’s a horrible, awful situation to be in. Although it would be really easy to make some drama between characters and their families, even the characters who die have good relationships with their families, and neither the dead teens or their parents are ever narratively ‘punished’ for anything that happens. Kris’ last words to her mom before she leaves on a flight, about eight hours before Kris is murdered, are, realistically, “Love you.” The last thing Nancy says to her own mother is, “I know you were just trying to protect us. Thank you,” and her mother’s last words to her are, “I’m just glad you’re safe.” Characters still die, but they at least get the peace of deserved last words to each other. The film also not only definitely does not vilify the parents for burning Freddy to death for assaulting their preschool aged kids, but comes down in its finale openly supporting that vigilante justice decision, with Nancy’s last words in the film being thanking her mother for protecting them.

Even the whole nightmare theme fits in well with the story being told, because nightmares are a very common side-effect of past trauma, symbolically, there’s a lot people have to fight through in their lives when that kind of shit happens to them, even years later, and it genuinely isn’t given enough weight by most people. As kind of icing on the cake in the film, not only does Nancy get to kill Freddy, he dies in a very ugly, undignified way, with a slit throat and gross expression on his face, after getting his ass handed to him in a like a thirty second fight in reality with two very motivated teenagers.

Plus, Quentin Smith is canonically ADHD, and Nancy Holbrook is a really underrated protagonist who reads autistic and I love her.

Anyway. This movie does a great job about using horror as a medium to talk about a topic usually only people already interested in that specific topic would check out, plays out its narrative very responsibly, comes down hard with a big two thumbs up to murdering your local pedophile in a bonfire, and says fuck you to assault victim stigma. My only real beef with this film is that they were so dead set sure they would have a sequel that instead of ending with real resolution, it’s got a stinger at the end (on rewatches I always skip the last scene lol).

Not that it’s a flawless film—it’s got budget parents, which I think is both hilarious and fantastic (meaning everyone except I think Dean has only one parent, the same gender as them, and it’s hilarious and I adore it). They had rushed filming for some of the end. Etc. But it’s really solid, and doesn’t get enough credit as a film. It’s very different from the original—less campy, less funny. But it’s supposed to be. It’s telling a different story. And it’s telling a really good one.

[cunninginstinct]

✩✩?

Disagreements:

Who is more likely to raise their voice? I feel like Dhana might, when Sand is mad he’s more like the dangerous, quietly-spoken angry. He does, however, raise his voice when panicked/frightened. Who threatens to leave but never actually does? Sand would be more likely to bluff in this aspect. Who actually keeps their word and leaves? If Sand pushes Dhana too far I think she might be the first to walk away, but I guess it depends on the situation o: Who trashes the house? Between Dhana and Sand, I think definitely Dhana xD Do either of them get physical? Nope, there’s always a better way of sorting these things out How often do they argue/disagree? Because Sand often likes to argue for argument’s sake and Dhana feels like a rebellious sort, they’re probably 50-50 on any given topic :P Who is the first to apologise? This is also something I feel is 50-50, both of them have to work around their pride and accept where they went wrong.

Sex:

Who is on top? I feel like Sand won’t have Dhana’s endurance so Dhana would more likely be on top - that’s the feeling I get, anyways Who is on the bottom? Sand would take this role but still try to remain dominant to some degree. Who has the strangest desires? Definitely Sand. Any kinks? I can see them both sharing a penchant for public exhibition (with help from invisibility spells, wards, etc) to some degree? I might be wrong, though. Who’s dominant in bed? Sand Is head ever in the equation? Absolutely, especially if they want to draw out their pleasure for as long as possible If so, who is better at performing it? Sand, he’s not known to have a silver tongue for nothing ;D Ever had sex in public? Of course, but remaining very, very careful all the while. Who moans the most? Sand, totally Who leaves the most marks? I definitely see Dhana leaving all sorts of hickies and bites and whatnot Who screams the loudest? Maybe Dhana? Who is the more experienced of the two? Sand’s got centuries of experience under his belt Do they ‘fuck’ or ‘make love’? Sand does not ‘fuck’. Nor is he likely to make love unless he’s absolutely feeling that love - he’s more likely to have sex like it’s a contest or a performance, and he always tries to find ways to have the upper hand. Rough or soft? I feel like Dhana might be rougher while Sand tries to keep things soft and subtle. How long do they usually last? ...Dhana would have him beat. XD Is protection used? Of course! Mage armor, protection from alignment, sanctuar-- oh. I mean, yeah, they make use of contraceptives either before or after. With two mages there’s always something to use in their favor. Does it ever get boring? Never. Where is the strangest place they’d have sex? They wouldn’t make it too outlandish, Sand has a reputation to upkeep. I suppose it depends on how far Dhana’s willing to go.

Family:

Do your muses plan on having children/or have children? I can’t see them having kids, but depending on how far along a romance would go, that could possibly be subject to change. If so, how many children do your muses want/have? Probably no more than one or two. Who is the favorite parent? Dhana Who is the authoritative parent? Sand Who is more likely to allow the children to have a day off school? Dhana Who lets the children indulge in sweets and junk food when the other isn’t around? I’m feeling Dhana on this but I might be wrong :P Who turns up to extra curricular activities to support their children? Totally Sand Who goes to parent teacher interviews? Sand Who changes the diapers? Poor Dhana would be stuck with this doody duty. Sand has an extremely acute sense of smell. Who gets up in the middle of the night to feed the baby? Sand, as an elf, doesn’t need sleep, so he’ll be the one to answer those cries. Who spends the most time with the children? I can see them trying to be equitable with time spent, so 50-50? Who packs their lunch boxes? Also 50-50, I think Who gives their children ‘the talk’? Sand tries, he really does. But he doesn’t use layman’s terms so the children would have to turn to Dhana to understand what the fuck he just told them xD Who cleans up after the kids? Sand would know how to get almost any stain out. Who worries the most? More likely Sand, our poor guy is an ex-hosttower mage and he’s got boundless paranoia. Who are the children more likely to learn their first swear word from? DHANA xD

Affection:

Who likes to cuddle? I’m giving this one to Dhana Who is the little spoon? Sand. He’s the little everything. Who gets naughty in the most inappropriate of places? Probably Dhana, but Sand is just as bad if he allows it :P Who struggles to keep their hands to themself?  Dhana maybe? How long can they cuddle until one becomes uncomfortable? This one I’m not sure about. Maybe an hour? Who gives the most kisses? Dhana, maybe What is their favourite non-sexual activity? Probably reading or cooking together Where is their favourite place to cuddle? In front of the fireplace Who is more likely to playfully grope the other? Dhana, but Sand would sneak one once in a while for payback How often do they get time to themselves? It depends on how often they’re running for their lives on another whirlwind adventure XD

Sleeping:

Who snores? Dhana - Sand wouldn’t make such an undignified sound If both do, who snores the loudest? Dhana, still Do they share a bed or sleep separately? They’d share a bed, assuming they’re in a romantic relationship or closely platonic If they sleep together, do they cozy up together or lay far apart? Probably far apart Who talks in their sleep? Sand doesn’t sleep, so this one goes to Dhana if she does at all What do they wear to bed? Either nothing at all, or pajamas Are either of your muses insomniacs? I guess Sand counts, since he doesn’t need sleep. Maybe Dhana too, if she continues to have nightmares Can sleeping pills be found by the bedside? For Sand? Not really. He might have a brew or a supplement to offer to Dhana if she can’t find rest though. Do they wrap their limbs around each other or just lay side by side? Side by side at first but they may end up tangled some time later Who wakes up with bed hair? Elven hair is almost always immaculate, so Dhana would definitely have the bed hair. Who wakes up first? Totally Sand Who prepares breakfast in bed for the other? Sand, if he’s feeling generous What is their favourite sleeping position? Probably the basic side-by-side or spooning. Who hogs the sheets? Dhana, but maybe Sand too Do they set an alarm each night? I’m not sure those exist in FR o: Can a television be found in their bedroom? Doesn’t exist Who has nightmares? Dhana Who has ridiculous dreams? Probably also Dhana Who sprawls out and takes up most of the bed? Also also Dhana Who makes the bed? Sand What time is bed time? Any time they feel tired after sundown Any routines/rituals before bed? Probably hygiene and general care/maintenance. Who’s the grumpiest when they wake up? Dhana, but Sand’s almost always grumpy to some degree.

Work:

Who is the busiest? Sand, he’s got a whole shop to run and a Knight Captain with a penchant for raising Cain to advise Who rakes in the highest income? Sand? I think? Are any of your muses unemployed? I’m not sure if Dhana’s work as an adventurer counts as employment but I think it does count, so neither? Who takes the most sick days? I’m not sure about this one Who is more likely to turn up late to work? Sand runs his own shop and there’s not really much of a punch in-punch out aspect for adventuring, so... neither? Maybe Sand? Who sucks up to their boss? Absolutely Sand. When he’s able to successfully stifle his sarcasm, his self-preservation makes him quite the suck-up. He’ll hate himself to some degree afterwards, though. “Gods, how ingratiating...” What are their jobs? Sand is a wizard, alchemist, shopkeep, spy, and lawyer. Dhana is an adventurer and a sorceress (maybe more?) Who stresses the most? Sand is five feet of stress with pointy ears. Do your muses enjoy or despise their careers/occupations? Sand enjoys wizarding but hates being under Nasher’s thumb. As for Dhana, it would depend on what her current task is? Are your muses financially stable? I’d say... yes, most likely

Home:

Who does the washing? I can imagine like any well-balanced couple, they’d take turns Who takes out the trash? Also taking turns Who does the ironing? Doesn’t exist? I think? Who does the cooking? Sand’s cooking is hit or miss tbh and I’m not sure what kind of skill Dhana has Who is more likely to burn the house down just trying? .........That’s a good question Who is messier? Sand’s neat and orderly so that rules him out. Dhana maybe? Who leaves the toilet roll empty? Neither Who leaves their dirty clothes on the floor? Neither? I think? Who forgets to flush the toilet? NEITHER Who is the prankster around the house? Dhana 100% Who loses the car keys when it comes time to go somewhere? Cars don’t exist Who mows the lawn? What lawn? :P Who answers the telephone? What’s a telephone? Who does the vacuuming? Whaa? Who does the groceries? Both of them Who takes the longest to wash? Probably Sand, he’s very thorough. Who spends the most time in the bathroom? Maybe Dhana?

Miscellaneous:

Is money a problem? Nope! How many cars do they own? How many what now? Do they own their home or do they rent? They own Do they live near the coast or deep in the countryside? Near the coast Do they live in the city or in the country? City Do they enjoy their surroundings? Sand will always find something to complain about, so maybe not What’s their song? Probably the Love Song from Dragon Age but that’s subject to change the more Dhana and Sand interact What do they do when they’re away from each other? I imagine they’ll think about each other while trying to keep themselves occupied. They’ll read or attend to business or forge on ahead with whatever’s got them busy, but they’ll keep each other in their thoughts. Where did they first meet? I think in the market? Dhana was running away from someone? But that was a couple Sand RP blogs ago How did they first meet? ^^^ Who spends the most money when out shopping? Maybe Sand? He’s more likely to get the expensive stuff because it’s a quality he can be satisfied with.

Who’s more likely to flash their assets? If this means what I think it means, then Sand’s more likely to show off his expensive stuff. If it means what my dirty mind tells me, I think maybe the both of them are above these sort of things xD Who finds it amusing when the other trips over? Dhana probably can’t help but giggle - so much for that famous ‘elven grace’. Any mental issues? I can imagine PTSD to some degree, some depression Who’s terrified of bugs? Sand. He’s already reaching for the newspaper to swat it with. Who kills the spiders around the house? Sand again. Their favourite place? LIBRARY <3 Who pays the bills? Sand Do they have any fears for their future? Oh, tons Who’s more likely to surprise the other with a fancy dinner? Probably Sand Who uses up all of the hot water? Impossible, they can always make more. One of the many uses of magic :P Who’s the tallest? Totally Dhana. Who’s more likely to just randomly hop into the shower with the other? Does this exist? If it does... maybe Dhana? Who wanders around in their underwear? I’m not sure about this one Who sings the loudest when singing along to the radio? That doesn’t exist, but when Deekin starts singing Sand will 110% of the time plug his ears What do they tease each other about? Sand might tease her lightheartedly about her mannerisms or a lack of subtlety, and she might tease him about his snootiness and his constant need to be right Who is more likely to cringe at the other’s fashion sense at times? Sand would be more likely to show his distaste at Dhana’s wardrobe xD Do they have mutual friends? They both know Rith and Deekin! Who crushed first? Probably Sand. He’s quite affection-starved and if you know the right things to say he’s easy to please. Any alcohol or substance related problems? I don’t know about this yet Who is more likely to stumble home, drunk, at 3am? Dhana Who swears the most? Dhana, tops