#explain it before the others can. LOL
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No one will ever understand how much I think about agent 8/sheldon/Annie/Marie friendship dynamic potential it’s everything to me *starts grabbing head and yelling* THEYRE EVERYTHING TO ME!!!!!
#the fact that sheldon knows them all and they all probably hang out around his shop from time to time makes it inevitable that they’d start#meeting each other.. and the fact that Marie probably already knows of agent 8 from cuttlefish!!#3 of them are all really passionate about weapons (more headcanon for Marie but whatever.)#and Annie is just happy to be included even if she’s really quiet about it. and she’s picked up a bit of weapons know how from sheldon so#she can follow along#Annie asking a question about a weapon she’s putting a sticker on and the other three trip over each other trying to enthusiastically#explain it before the others can. LOL#I bet the other three babysit Sheldon’s kids/trainees every now and then. Annie more likely probably because#her store is right next to the shelly and donny ammo knights location#but I bet Marie babysits them too she’s like their fun aunt.#DOES ANYONE UNDERSTAND MEEEE#Your honor the cuteness of their friend group dynamic would be insane#btw they’re all autistic of course.
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siffrin starts the game with oddly empty pockets for a rogue who has a habit of stashing away every little trinket that isn't nailed down
and a hardy pocketwatch is an indispensable tool for oceanic navigation
#loop slinking off from the other half of the party to go jump a random rival rogue before The Morality Squad can get on their ass#anyway this is once again me playing with How To Do Comics Literally At All. no real deeper message just a random ficlet basically#ALSO YEAH. MAP MEN LINK. YOU FIND ANOTHER CONSISE EXPLAINER ON THE CHRONOMETER LOL#isat#isat fanart#in stars and time#in stars and time fanart#isat spoilers#sifloop#isat siffrin#isat odile#isat loop#lucabyteart#the compass is there mostly to make the pocket watch navigation thing more obvious + because i like the staging of loop presenting 2 items#big dipper/polaris is the most basic choice to get across NAVIGATORY USE OF CONSTELLATIONS but . beggars cant be choosers#also the return of the Vague Postcanon Loop Outfit. love to just put them in a vague toga or whatever.#implication wrt odile's questioning is they still havent come clean about anything. but she's got suspicions.#theyre playing Truth Confession Chicken. psychological warfare#+ bonus artist's insight: loop odile up top there is me channelling the pop team epic GOGOGO DANGER ZONE comic#[odile voice] careful. danger zone. [loop voice] but i love danger zone.......
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Meme Prompt 2
Thinkin of feral halfa Jason again. No surprise there.
#dcxdp#dpxdc#prompts#halfa jason#de aged danny#alongside the entire class#GIW were doing experiments with the more ecto contaminated of the amity parkers#And experimenting with how cores are formed in hopes of learning how to permanently destroy them#They just chose the worst place to set up their labs thanks to there being a new reaper-class ecto-being settling down there#Does this count as mpreg lol#Technically he's just carrying the cores until they can reform bodies even if they're lil babies now#Well their bodies are toddlers they still have their minds for the most part#I imagine this takes place before anything like the Titans Tower or just after the heads in a duffel bag#On one hand he's not thought to be gunning after robin#on the other he's a very territorial brooding halfa with no one explaining to him why he's so aggressive to intruders#he stress bakes and cooks a lot which the children of crime alley and people are chill with#free food after all#Crime Alley seeing Hood's glowing green eyes: We've connected the dots#Jason with his several toddlers with teh same glowing eyes: You haven't connected shit#Crime Alley already researching supernatural and alien creatures: We've connected them#jason todd#crime alley#goonion#danny fenton#jazz fenton#dan fenton#ellie fenton#valerie gray#tucker foley#sam manson
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someone mentioned the rose maple moth is spamton colours which naturally made me want to draw moth mini spamton, BUT THEN I remembered plot for soot boi
Long story short, soot sprite Ralsei is a the remnant of the dying Dark Fountain, being a soot sprite means he has the potential "spark" to re-ignite the Dark Fountain again. Some more plot happens and our little soot sprite (along with Kris) goes through trials and tribulations (7 to be exact) to obtain a 'soul' of his own; our little soot sprite becomes an ember. That spark to ignite the Dark Fountain anew!
There's a mysterious 'wizard' that looks after the Fountain, the one who created the walled-off city to protect it, and he's getting desperate to save the Fountain he had so lovingly cared for and powered, even utilizing the little soot sprites it seems to spit out! I can absolutely see him sending out a little special variant of spamton to confirm that Ralsei does indeed have the [LIGHT] and the key to save the Dark Fountain.
This is a long winded, convoluted way of saying Moth Spamton would LOVE Ralsei when he becomes an ember. He would cling to him like he's a heavenly angel :)
#am i trying to squeeze spamton into the plot because we had it planned out before chp 2 released? maybe#the story is plotted out and its like 100 chapters long LOL#but alas i am no writer#i only draw silly little guys#spamton#soot sprite ralsei#deltarune#honestly a bit embarrassed to explain some of the plot this way but you can also just see it as a cute moth spamton hugging ralsei too#but i also love reading other peoples stories so heres a bit of mine...?
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Moomin. Moomin in Minecraft. please?
Day 16 - Are you new to the valley?
#My art#Requestober#Moomin#Minecraft#Man! It's been a long dang time since I last drew this squish lad!#This is the first time he's been requested for Requestober! :D How fun!!#I'm sure he'd play on Normal difficulty but it's hard for me to imagine the Valley as anything other than Peaceful#There's so many spooks and spectres and weird creatures! Of course it would be Normal at least!!#But it's also all so soft and sweet and slow and comforting ah... Peaceful....#I don't want Moomin to have to encounter a Creeper haha - though he'd probably just get mad about it being rude#''Well! That's no way to treat someone you've just met!'' Hehe <3#The bee was attracted by Moomin's flower accessories :3#I always draw him so cute he really looks like Snork Maiden haha#Moomintroll are androgynous anyway it's fine it's fine haha#I think Moominmamma would get really into raising bees and crops and the like :D#Moominpappa would probably be all about taming horses and fighting skeletons haha#Snufkin disappears going one direction and somehow loops back around from the other side after three days lol#Moomin would try to follow him of course but would return home before long - especially if Snufkin goes up a mountain!#Little My would be a griefer lol - steals any spare supplies and squirrels them away in a trapped chest haha#I like to imagine Snufkin explaining not to look in an Enderman's eyes from under his hat and Moomin sneaking little peeks#Hehe <3 I forgot how fun assigning Minecraft playstyles to characters can be!#A good reminder ♪
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made the rest of kel's apocalypse crew :-)
#mads is in the hat & wolfe is in the glasses#wolfe doesn't have an apocalypse nickname yet#i actually didn't need to make him for red's origin story but since i already made kel & sis & i needed mads for the story i thought#why not. might as well make all of em#unfortunately for everyone wolfe is in charge of their group bc he's the oldest#they all knew each other pre-apocalypse. mads is sis' gf & wolfe is sis & kel's like...... kind of cousin/brother sort of.#i think i've explained this before. n e way.#it's very weird seeing him not blond#can you tell he was a poetry major lol#rainyrambles#mb:ex
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The chucklefucks <3
I haven’t drawn these two in a while and wanted to see how different they look since then. They look relatively the same, my art style’s just improved lol
For those unaware these two were made for a “fake game” zine that got cancelled— but I got so attached to them and the concept that I kept them around. The premise is that an anxiety-ridden college student gets haunted by the demonic spirit of a dead rockstar and the two work together to win Vee concert tickets to her favorite artist, “Von Bomba”, while also figuring out the mysterious circumstances around Andi’s death.
At some point in time I’ll get to covering their story, but for now you get one off illustrations and concept art !!! 💥
#sorry for the long ramblings I get really passionate about my characters lol#but to further explain the game it would be a rythmn/action game with heavy inspiration from parappa the rapper and um jammer lammy#as well as from No Straight Roads#the biggest theme of the game would probably be centered around like. the struggles of the music industry and the ups and downs it can take#—on a person/group#Vee and Andi would be parallels of each other with Vee throughout the game building her confidence and learning to follow her heart#while Andi is meant to face reality and reflect on his behavior and how much of a shithead he was before he died#I could ramble on and on in the tags forever but if you want to hear me yap just go to my ask box lol#art#traditional art#original character#original characters#sketch#fake game#demon oc#rock n toll
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i'm now looking at my list of least favorite french words to pronounce and going "too many r's" for about 40% of them and "skill issue" for most of the rest. some of these are actually very fun to pronounce i just couldn't wrap my tongue around them a year or so ago, but now i can i guess??? so that's very exciting. makes me hope that someday i'll be able to pronounce the rest of them. this is a bit pie in the sky because i really don't see myself ever getting there with procureur du roi but you never know. and luckily the french abolished the monarchy so it's not like i'll ever have to use that phrase in modern conversation.
anyway here are the words i actually love pronouncing now: décaféiné diététicien filleul pneumonie
i now feel normal/neutral about these words that used to be hard for me: automne, condamner douloureux électricité, énergie inférieur, supérieur, etc. itinéraire lourdeur salmonellose sclérose subodorer succincte
words that are definitely within the realm of my current capability but i haven't practiced them enough: bugle hiérarchisation méditerranéen phtisie
words that are still the bane of my existence but i live in hope: [yʁ] plus at least one other r or [y] sound: chirurgie, fourrure, marbrure, moirure, nourriture, ordures, peinturlurer, procureur du roi, prurit, purpurin, sculpture, serrurerie, structure, sulfureux, tournure all words beginning with ur-, hur-, or sur- other difficult sequence of r's and vowels: construire and other -truire verbs; lueur and sueur; utérus too many r's: marbre, martre, meurtre, opprobre, proroger, réfrigérateur, rétrograde, rorqual difficult sequence of vowels and/or semivowels: coopérant, extraordinaire, hémorroïdal, kyrie eleison, météorologique, micro-ordinateur, micro-organisme, mouillure, quatuor, vanillier not pronounced the way i would expect from the spelling: indemne, penta-, punk just hard for some reason: humour
#girl you didn't like filleul????? get well soon damn#the french love writing about linden trees (tilleuls) so i've now had tons of practice with that sequence of sounds and love it#all the words that are hard for some reason other than r sounds is just a skill issue. and it makes sense because a lot of them are#not common words so when would i even be practicing them?#the words that are hard because of r sounds is also a skill issue but that's one that i don't know i will be able to fix through practice#i think i have maybe plateaued with my r sounds lol. but you never know!#bugle is a funky word. i want to love it. someday i will.#you'd think i would have méditerranéen down by now since it is a pretty common word. but it still trips me up. i'll get there#sur- words are bad because i just end up whistling the s?? i think i'm pronouncing the [y] too forward in the mouth#i just looked at my ladefoged and he's like 'rounding lowers the second formant so [y] sounds like it's between [i] and [u]'#but i think i'm trying too hard to get it really close to [i] and maybe overcompensating for the formant drop#and actually pronouncing [y] MORE forward in the mouth than [i]? that's my guess#french#fun with pronunciation#my posts#i deleted a couple words from the list if i couldn't remember why they were hard. filtre? what's so bad about filtre...#yeah folklore is a little weird in french but it's not like putting an l before a k is phonotactically illegal it's just unusual#and not at all difficult for an anglophone ultimately#lubrifiant? idk why i would have felt strongly enough about lubrifiant to go back in my drafts several pages to add it to the post#the rest of these though i can explain. électricité and énergie were hard because my mouth just automatically wanted to pronounce#the second vowel as é as well#automne and condamner were hard because you don't nasalize the vowel before the m AND you don't pronounce the m#these are now so normal to me that i can't get myself to remember the pronunciation of indemne (in which the m IS pronounced)
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This interview confirmed
The point of the wilds era games is showcasing mechanics, the 'core' of both games was to build and walk around
There will be no DLC
There will not be another direct sequel
The ultrahand will not continue in future games
The timeline is intentionally unclear to make the game accessible for new fans and the development process (tl;dr All Zelda games are intentionally AUs to a degree)
The producer and director both deny intentional references to prior games in the story, but then say that these similarities represent the soul of the series and the overall myth of The Legend of Zelda (pick a lane)?
The timeline doesn't matter, outside of specific sets of games it's irrelevant on purpose. Whatever you think about the timeline is correct. Continuity is not the point. Maintaining the form while creating something new is the point.
Fujibayashi really only cares about mechanics and Aunoma is totally cool with that
#yikes!#cw negativity#aunoma's answers were better than fujibayashi's but yeeugh what a bad taste in the mouth#'this is the first time i'm hearing the theory that these are direct references to prior games' sir have you spoken to your story departmen#don't answer that i know the answer is no#man these interviews are so bleak lol#Interviewer's like: Hey can you tell us about this story and they're like: (chanting) yeah whatever have you checked out the tech tho#Finding out Fujibayashi literally had No background in storytelling before becoming a director makes SO much sense#he started as an attraction designer for theme parks like his whole skillet is based in how to get people to walk around efficiently#which granted is an important skill in game desing! but GOD it explains EVERYTHING about the last three titles lmao#he literally said his first game job was pitching Other People's Concepts to the director. Then he became the director.#Baffling lol#I'm glad actual fans of story work in the story department or we'd be completely doomed#At least currently there's Some Glimmers now and then#but Aunoma wants to leave the series to him and I hrk--!!
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Labeling this one mature cause it’s artistic nudity, which isn’t something I usually draw but yippie! Scar and anatomy reference! :3
I have explanations of where most of these scars come from, so I’ll go through them :)
The massive one covering his whole upper back is the one Dracula gave him and the one that bares the curse. I tried to make it kinda gnarly looking, but still distinctly claw marks. There’s a couple other scratches near it from other creatures.
The ones on his arms come from a couple things. I imagine he uses his arm bracers a lot to block things and sometimes hits are still enough to leave a mark under them. The scars also come from an effect of the curse: rotting. Rot usually starts at extremities and would leave some nastiness there, probably exacerbated by moving a lot. The first three images have the legs not visible but I usually put something similar there too.
Speaking of, the very large ones on his lower legs in the fourth image are burn scars from the scene of X68000 and Chronicles where the rooms before Dracula set on fire! I guess some of it might also be from walking in the cursed swamp too.
Most of the random smaller ones are just generally from fighting monsters. Tbh I’d be more surprised if he didn’t have any scars from having axes and bones and fire and fleamen thrown at him all the time lol.
In the third image there’s a couple bite marks and yeah those are from Drac too. I’ve seen some folklore about vampires being able to drain people long distance or while not being entirely corporal and yeah that sounds like something he’d do through the curse just to make Simon’s life worse. Idk, I have the novel Dracula and I should be reading it for other ideas for stuff tbh. This one might change entirely eh who knows. Either way, I think the curse’s ultimate goal was to make him suffer and then turn him after he dies from it so I wanted to add some more implications that he’d become a vampire if he failed to break the curse.
There’s some other things of note that aren’t scars. I try to make him look a little frailer and thinner in Simon’s Quest cause well yeah the curse. I don’t think it’s noticeable here since the fourth image isn’t the Simon’s Quest design and he doesn’t look much wider whoops. I’ll have to try to keep how ripped he is more consistent in later drawings 💀. Uhh I also try to make his eyes look significantly more tired, way larger eye creases and a bit of dark. If this was a colored drawing there’d be a little red under his eyes and he’d be paler than the last image. Just details to make him look sick ig.
Yeah, these are mostly doodles just for me to look back at and make sure I’m drawing him consistently d(^^ ).
#castlevania#castlevania games#akumajo dracula#akumajou dracula#castlevania ii#castlevania 2#castlevania simon’s quest#castlevania ii: simon's quest#simon’s quest#simon belmont#my art#art post#incoherent rambling#aaaaa I keep blanking on what tags I’ve used before#yeah yippie reference doodles yay#shout out to Pinterest for having good pose reference#idk why it’s so hard to find nice angles of people from back view tho 💀#it’s either stock photo directly of a dude’s back no fun pose at all or it’s like not enough back in view to use as reference lol#I’ll probably better explain these in comic stuff but whatever eh#I guess I should tw so this can be filtered out easier tbh but idk what to put hmm#tw nudity#tw scars#only warning for that cause there’s a lot of them hopefully that doesn’t come off as insensitive#tw body horror#for the small description of rot and other curse stuff#poor Simon :(#anyway—#good old midnight posting lol#the inspo struck what can I say
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~
#they speak!#it's probably just the illness that's making me extra irritable but like.#roommate kept coming up to me this morning going oh did i wake you up? i'm sorry if i did. did i do that or no? i'm really sorry.#and i kept telling him to stop saying sorry because i didn't have the brain power to phrase#'you could've been more considerate of your volume but you also have the right to use the common space so it's whatever'#but he said it to me again before i went to my room just now and it's like. ok. shut up.#if you actually cared that much u would've just been quieter in the first place actually.#anyways. annoyed. there were some annoying customers in the store today but it was whatever.#i feel like my fucks to give had already worn out with all the ppl in my social circle/my parents and the recent ongoings of that#[redacted] was being passive aggressive to me in the group chat and it's like. ok! idk what u want from me.#and i'm grateful for them for coming over and helping me with cleaning last week#and it's those sorts of actions that let me know they care and want good things for me#but like. i haaaate telling them anything because even innocuous non-private things get turned into judgement with them.#also. more and more i can feel how i'm drifting away from h and now with retrospect i can see how we mutually hurt each other :)#i keep coming back to this one period where i really wanted to take them to try dimsum and they kept saying they were too scared to try it#and in their new friend group they regularly go out n get dimsum together. which on the surface is like. why didn't you want to go with /me#i told you i wanted to share what i liked and i would explain what things were and i could do the talking and you still said no#but it's also very much a reflection of how i always rolled over and enabled them. i never challenged them. i was always passive.#i also feel like i'm heavily neglecting e and a recently and i can tell how the physical distance is affecting us and idk. it's weird.#anyways. another post that should've been a journal entry! lol!#when [redacted] helped with cleaning they also buried my journal under my like#300 packets of sesame candies and i can't be bothered to dig it out. also my bandaids are missing now. <3#ik this also sounds passive aggressive but genuinely appreciate the help i just kinda hate how they think hidin everything in boxes is good#'we need to get you some more storage boxes and containers!!' actually i think that will be the opposite of helpful.#i need everything visible and on open surfaces so i can 1) remember they exist for me to use and 2) not have barriers for me to get to them
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In the end I think my biggest complaint with Dead Boy Detectives is that it's paced like a kid's show despite being a young adult show. If they just aimed for 2-5 minutes less in every episode, I think the characters wouldn't have had those moments where they seemed a little bad at their job for how long it was taking to figure things out.
#i was gonna say 'all other elements being like a teen or adult show' and then i remembered the article that compared it to the OC haha#dead boy detectives#i said this#they walked into that house and saw the family reliving their deaths and i knew it was a loop but they watched it twice#and just stood there before figuring it out#edit: wait them being TWELVE in the comica kind of explains that lol#idk if epiaodes were closely following comica but i can see how that can be hard to change if u v familar with the original#wait they dont age up do thsy that means t hey knew their sexualities and were having relationships at TWELVE?? ahhh allos scare me
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finally found a place to read With the Light online and i'm thrilled; if you haven't read this manga i do Legitimately recommend it
#N posts stuff#like don't get it wrong it Is Not a series about being autistic it Is a series about raising an autistic kid#but also don't be put off by that because it's legitimately a series that I feel Loves autistic people with its whole being#it's kind of a teaching manga so it showcases a lot of different opinions/characters/conflicts/etc. but the Framing is very consistent#in that the manga is Extremely of the opinion that autistic people are People who deserve to be Valued and Accepted As They Are#the onus for change is never put on autistic individuals the framing is basically Universal in the 'the World needs to change#to be more accepting' -- it's a very Social Model depiction of autism that ALSO never veers too far into the#'autism isn't even Really a disability' fallacy; it's very much a 'A lot of autistic people will need constant support in a variety of ways#throughout their lives but that isn't the roadblock preventing them from having their own lives; ableism in society is the roadblock'#the first two chapters are the hardest to get through bc they take place before Sachiko has any real understanding of autism and#so she's isolated and stressed out and the ignorance makes it difficult for her to care for Hikaru properly (there's also a lot of#other characters Blaming her for what's going on which goes unchallenged at this point though that changes later); but after she#understands what autism is she's Firmly in Hikaru's corner for the rest of the series - you can skip right to ch 3 without a problem#if you're not interested in reading about that initial conflict#there's still a Lot of conflict ofc but by then the chapters have some of my favorite moments so i don't want to advocate skipping#them; like Hikaru's daycare teacher explaining how Hikaru's difficulty speaking is the same as other kids' troubles with#things like jump-roping/etc.; and then a mother who has An Issue with Hikaru's presence in her daughter's class realizing the#depth of the problematic opinion bc Her mother (who had a stroke) faces similar ableism from her peers#i'm cutting this post off b4 the tags get Too long but if you're curious but still hesitant man. send me an ask and i will Happily#write an insanely long essay about how much i love this series; i have all the books i'm not excited about the online availability#for Me i'm excited bc i've been wanting to rec this manga for like almost a full decade and i can finally give you a link instead of#saying 'well. you can find used copies sometimes' lol
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tbh my advice to other disabled people is Don’t Be Afraid To Be An Asshole Sometimes. like not unprovoked but if people are bothering you. you may think “he probably doesn’t mean anything by it” and maybe you’re even right, but if you’re enough of a pain in the ass about it then people learn not to be ableist next time and it doesn’t actually hurt them any aside from momentarily feeling horribly awkward. grill ME on why i’m sitting down at an event where most people stand up and you get my whole medical history in painstaking detail loud enough for everyone nearby to hear our conversation. and the bonus of this is it flips an interaction that would otherwise be upsetting and embarrassing to you back around onto the dick who tried to make you feel that way. it’s your turn to feel like you’ve personally fucked up the vibe at the whole party now, dipshit
#you can tailor it to the severity of the offense too#like if it’s just a guy saying i should stand up i just list the reasons im not doing that in a matter of fact manner#but if someone actually goes so far as to make like. a horribly offensive remark.#like a guy who once said autistic people have no souls right in front of me not knowing i was autistic#you can rip the motherfucker apart LOL#for that one i went with ‘did you know i’m autistic too!’ followed by pretending to be confused every time he tried to explain himself and#asking for clarification until he literally gave up and put his hat over his face LMAO#‘i don’t look autistic? so what does autistic look like then???’#‘i’m different from other autistic people you know? i didn’t know you had so many autistic friends who are they! can you introduce us?#oh you don’t actually have any?? so are you lying? oh you meant your friend’s 5 year old son? are most allistic adults you know the same as#allistic 5 year olds? you know i work with kids a lot but i haven’t noticed that before!’
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Atsushi's back in the game!!! ۶( ˆ o ˆ )
#And Kouyou!!!!#Also. I can say Steinbeck is kinda 👀👀👀#King of the specific category of “I forget I like him until he's on screen”#I'm seriously unlocking memories with this rewatch. Like I haven't thought about it in two years–#but I just know when I was watching the anime for the first time I was being like#“Of COURSE the villains need to spend several minutes each episode explaining in detail how their own superpowers work so that the–#protagonists can get a perfect idea of how to best counter them. Why are villains made so freaking stupid in this show” aljhvwslchvqliyqwb#But. Eh. I guess that's just bsd to you.#Alsoooooo random thought of the day: I don't really favour how Tanizaki's ability was adapted in the anime.#I very well understand they were going for this green Matrix-like illusion effect‚ but every time someone says “... Snow?”#I'm like please explain where do you live that has snow glowing green.#Aamsjgvfaskjhfv sorry this is me being very. Cranky and nitpicky and having terrible audience etiquette in refusing to–#engage in suspension of disbelief. It just bugs me akvakcvqkyb I just feel like... Green is such a non-snow color–#that quite of completely disrupts the Light Snow / Sasame Yuki aesthetic. I would have liked it much better light blue or simply white.#What else. The way the Guild just goes on at stereotypes still troubles me a lot. The “usamericans can't be touched by laws–#because they use money to corrupt anyone” “foreign criminal organization come in our country to corrupt our pure and untouched soil”#Idk. Maybe all of it is true. Can it still be deemed a stereotype when it's objectively something that's happened before–#and will probably keep happening?#I suppose I'm just not a fan of the constant hostility against any foreigner. Idk.#This situation besides is extremely ironical. If you meet me irl it probably won't take long to see me being very outspoken about–#how much I despise usa cultural colonization of all other countries. It's something that really bothers me‚ how rooted and pervasive–#their influence is. So in a lot of ways I can relate to the author's sentiment#I just feel that. If you start treating them as stereotypes and ignore the complexity of a country and the wide spectrum of causes–#that contribute to its attitude in international relations. You end up practicing precisely what you're trying to criticize.#Okay this is the last time I'm getting into the politics of the Guild arc lol#random rambles#This time I took watching the episode slow I feel a little late
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well not every shift is good it took me a while but i have taken notice of this
#i don't think she likes me. it's not her fault and probably not personal#but also to be honest some people could use a lesson in explaining stuff and giving orders. bc some aren't good at it#but also it was just one of those days when the other person is tired or not feeling it and i'm a burden#and also i think it might be her style too i mean it's like with my mother that she assumes i just know stuff/can guess what she means and#with certain stuff (to me seemingly almost on random but mostly the social stuff) she overexplains. like i'm an idiot or i spent my#years before this under a rock#and it's also that. i do something a hundred times according to an unspoken rule or like logically or how i saw others do it‚ and then the#one time i mess up or forget or something (bc. i mess up more than with others bc she makes me anxious. that's at least partially on me)#so the one time i do something differently or not perfectly she talks to me like i have never heard of the rule and have been messing up#all this time. which I don't appreciate#idk i just feel like my total incompetence was assumed at times today (← what i said earlier was a nice surprise‚ i mean that this#never happens here lol bc i'm kind of used to being treated like i'm stupid) and then at other times it was assumed that i know things i#haven't been shown or told about yet. some contradictory demands ig#and i just don't handle it well ig and it makes me feel like i'm at home.#but she was just tired it's whatever#kata.txt
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