#except triggers
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gonna be honest I kinda want to stop taking my meds
#like im in better moods now but also i cant feel anything . lol . nothing brings me strong emotion anymore#except triggers#it feels weird.#i miss being sick#whats wrong with me ?#well i still am. my OCD hasnt gotten any better. i just cant feel the depression it causes me anymore.#nothings changed. my life still sucks. im just not sad about it i guess. or i am but i can barely feel it#i dont know.#diary
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are. are you telling me that if the romanced mage warden dies and alistair is king, he deadass stares greagoir down over her dead body and grants the circle of ferelden its autonomy after ordering it rebuilt somewhere safer. first you have to deliberately leave him behind so he won't die for you and then he does that for you once you're gone, even when you're broken up??? absolute and literal king behaviour of the highest order????? the actions speak louder than words of it all??????? I think I hauve covid
#that's the hottest thing I've ever heard I feel nuts#what an absolute chad alistair continues to be tbh there may be a day when men fail but it will not be when he's here#like I'm very sorry to the blond chantry boy repeat crowd but cullen could & would NEVER!!! they are NOT the same!!!!#dragon age#dragon age origins#alistair theirin#alistair x warden#can u imagine what it must be like to be irving standing there watching this happen. you're free and your kid is dead. congrats#tried to free her from the circle and she's the sacrificial lamb that bought the circle's freedom instead. fuck dude#it does make for a very sad kind of symmetry that every time irving tries to get clever with it he triggers a monkey's paw situation fhdskj#I am replaying the game with my new canon (mistress amell + king alistair to save him from the da:i fade choice lol)#and in doing research I found out about this and had my world rocked. I've never had my warden die before so this is new to me#(my warden isn't dying in this canon to be clear she's going to be the reason no one would dare assassinate king alistair lol#nightmare bae eminance gris behind the throne/loving and supportive partner with a fade connection and a vengeful side#she's going to be like sam vimes tiredly fending off assassins as the watch books go on except she murders a lot more people back)#the way his voice breaks in the version where they were broken up tho... sick and twisted and mean to me specifically
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Ectoplasm and Jason Todd
Danny is wandering around Gotham (visiting, chasing a ghost, running from GIW, attending college, etc) and stumbles across Jason.
Jason who is flaring his ecto-signature like a madman (is he trying to get into trouble?).
Danny drags the guy into a nearby alley to give the guy some kind of crash-course on how not to do that.
Jason isn't sure why this guy grabbed him and dragged him into an alley, but if it's a fight he wants, Jason would be able to fight more freely in an alley, so he doesn't struggle. (Does he know that Jason is Red Hood? Does he think that Jason is a random civilian? Is it just him, or does this guy have really cold hands?)
Jason isn't sure why this guy is now trying to... ask him to meditate? The fuck is going on? But if it's not a fight, then... maybe it's fine to just listen to the weirdo? Taking a few deep breaths isn't going to hurt him.
Danny is very proud of himself for guiding the ecto-flaring guy through how to not flare his ecto-signature. He's such a good teacher.
And then Jason collapses.
Turns out, Jason has been using his anger to create a feedback-loop that artificially raises his ectoplasm-levels.
Ghosts need ectoplasm to live, but they'll also produce ectoplasm when feeling strong emotions. For most ghosts, this a bit like saying "everyone needs a good cry every now and then". For Jason, he's been basically aiming a gun at his own face for the adrenaline-rush. Constantly.
So, Danny is now holding onto a barely-conscious person who desperately needs more ectoplasm. As in, this is a medical emergency, and every second probably counts.
Danny, being that he wasn't planning on needing to carry around some kind of ectoplasm-container at all times (who the fuck does that? His parents, that's who), is now desperately trying to problem-solve this.
Danny realizes that, actually, even in his human form? Danny has a lot of ectoplasm in his body. Enough that he could probably save this guy by... feeding him his blood.
Cue intimately sexy reverse-vampire scene.
And oh boy, if Danny's blood doesn't taste fantastic to Jason's ecto-starved self.
#jason will probably have a LOT of questions. bcs what the fuck. what is ectoplasm? why does he need it?#why does this random guy have enough of it IN HIS BLOOD that he can work as a fucking vitamin-drink?#but yes. this idea is that the Pit Rage? ain't a separate thing. it's jason's anger. it comes from him and his trauma.#it just also happens to be what's allowing him to keep being alive. bcs without the rage his core just withers and dies#(unless it's hibernating in his sleep. obvs) but with him no longer starving? suddenly he CAN calm down. he can risk it.#he might not WANT to calm down. and a trigger would still absolutely be a trigger. but he has the option now.#AND ALSO sexy-vampire danny. except he's not ''suave'' or whatever. he's a fucking raccoon.#he's like the equivalent of a ''russian sex-machine'' with lots of blood-splatter and a feral look in his eyes.#everyone else: ''why the FUCK would you have sex with THAT?'' jason: ''i've never been more turned on in my LIFE''#dc comics#laughing#danny phantom#batman#stories#my writing#magical theory
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The one where Wade and Logan remind me of Achilles and Patroclus
Because what the fuck do you mean "Do I know you, bub?" Bitch I'm going to spay you
You would recognize him by touch alone. By smell.
You would know him blind by the way his breaths came and his feet struck the earth.
You would know him in death at the end of the world.
#let a bitch ship her ship will ya#there's something so patrochilles about them#except patroclus and achilles aren't self regenerating mutants#i wish i was to credit for this gay writing but i'm not#i'll have to fic it up#but yeah#poolverine#deadclaws#deadpool and wolverine#deadpool#wade wilson#wolverine#logan howlett#deadpool 2024#deadpool 3#“do i know you” logan I've only been writing eleven years and even I know you just triggered destiny by saying that#otp rules boyo you're not supposed to say that#it defaults you to be so down bad for the person you're saying that to#within 2 hours? Logan you fall QUICK#patroclus and achilles#quote from the song of achilles#quote from madeline miller#patroclus and achilles fanfic#patrochilles fanfic
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JAMES VOWLES SHUT THE FUCK UP CHALLENGE: FAILED
#formula 1#f1#logan sargeant#ls2#williams racing#it’s literally not even his fault#give him a half decent car at least#y’all are the ones who pulled him from f2 early#james vowles triggers my fight or flight#except it’s just fight#when i see him#it’s on sight#james vowles i hate you so much#you’ve taken a perfectly good racer and murdered his chance at a good career
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bestfriends always have their ups and downs, arguments and a couple fights lol
#rick and morty#rick sanchez#morty smith#ive already drawn them fighting AND IM DOING IT AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!#theyre defo fighting over some miniscule unimportant thing and theyre both too stubborn to back down now#also no one wins these fights at some point one of them just says smth that triggers the others autism#mortys bite mark is on the wrong hand except no it isnt and youre imagining things. youre crazy. everyone thinks youre acting super weird rn
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Makoto Naegi spent THREE YEARS not sparing a single GLANCE at his girlcrush because he felt like he genuinely wasn’t allowed to due to his weird complex when it came to himself compared to Ultimates and yet he STILL GOT THE GIRL. TWICE.
#naezono#makoto naegi#sayaka maizono#and sayaka spent 3 years looking at him.#just btw.#Makoto Naegi THE MAN YOU ARE!#except Sayaka was the one who picked him up by the scruff of his neck like a wet cat#danganronpa trigger happy havoc#danganronpa
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Why is the anime so weird, it's not even the same series dude?? It's like,
Anime:
GOKU: I have a great idea to bring peace to the universe, and my leadership and compassion alone will unite us all. I have No Flaws and am A True Relatable Everyman :)
VEGETA: NO! I AM THE BEST AND I WILL CAUSE PROBLEMS UNTIL I AM RECOGNIZED AS SUCH!!!!
Manga:
GOKU: Vegeta what's cornmeal made of? I know it's what the corn eats, but what's it made of? VEGETA: Hey Kakarot let's play the quiet game until one of us dies.
#dbtag#I do not understand this writing it's so bad aklsdlkasjd#Toei wants Goku to be Clark Kent SO bad and he SO isn't lmao#they're so good and dumb and rounded and complex in the manga what is the anime so afraid of#Toriyama said 'no no this man is a detached faux-immortal who has a dear pure heart but he's childlike and selfish even though he's kind'#and toei went 'got it goku's never done anything wrong ever in his life'#toriyama said 'Vegeta's gone through a lot and he's finally settling into his more mature leadership role with the confidence he's earned'#and toei said 'got it vegeta has the confidence of a high school bully except now he can interact with his family as a comedy bit'#girl hWHAT#Toei trying to group Goku and Vegeta as two people who would rather train than be with their families and Toriyama said NO Vegeta wants#to be HOME this is the first time in years that he's HAD ONE and it makes him HAPPY to be with his wife and children!!#Vegeta trains so that he can protect the things he doesn't want to lose again and Goku trains because it's the thing that makes him happies#They are NOT the same lmao And yeah Vegeta still wants to beat Goku but he also knows that Gohan could dogwalk both of them if he wanted#He also knows Trunks and Goten are going to surpass them it's not about being the best anymore he's past that he just wants to Not Need Gok#He just doesn't want to have to rely on Goku to save the day he wants to be Enough on his own he just wants to know he can be#because every time it's mattered he WASN'T and people he loved were lost to his inability to protect them and he carries that#Like Whis diagnosed him with anxiety and cptsd out in the open and Beerus said he was self-centered for feeling guilt#+ he lowkey enjoys the rivalry it keeps him goal-oriented so he can't get complacent and lazy which is what triggered his Buu Saga breakdow#realized how Fucked Up it was that having a home and loving family made him feel like he was failing and went 'wait no I won actually??'#now he's chill as fuck in the manga. cool confident leader.#and sometimes he is childish and dumb with Goku as a treat#you know what rocks about his rivalry with Goku in Super though is that it's Playful. Vegeta is learning how to Play.#You ever seen a shelter dog get introduced to a really playful dog and it takes a minute for the shelter dog to understand it's safe here#And then they're both running around the backyard playing hot potato with one braincell?? That's Goku and Vegeta's relationship#and the way the anime sleeps on that dynamic is so fucking criminal especially when it's literally canon it's in print it's out there#you had the playbook how'd you fumble it this bad#anyway that's my 25+ year blorbo thoughts I love Geets a lot okay#And I love Goku in the manga a lot I'd forgotten that he's actually a great character when Toei's not fucking up his whole vibe
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I think there's a misconception among some fans who mostly get their characterisation from ao3, that the reason Cass and Jason wouldn't get along is that Jason kills people and Cass hates murderers. And like. You're 50% right but the key context being ignored is that Cass would literally fight to defend the right of a serial killer to live and change like she believes desperately in second chances no matter how far gone the killer is. She'll knock a man out and break his hand so that he can never shoot and kill someone again but if she sees someone feel bad about their kill or even like. Hesitate to hurt a child. She is all over that like she will fight the world just to save this one kind of shitty assassin and give them a second chance at life where they can do better.
Whereas Jason believes that sometimes there are bad people that are simply too far gone, too much of a force of evil hurting and draining actual innocents. And the best way to deal with scumbags like that is a bullet. He feels that some people don't deserve to live, and he's comfortable ending their lives. Judge, jury and executioner. Because no one else is going to kill these people and they deserve to die so that they can never hurt any victims again.
Of course all of this is kind of irrelevant in current canon since dc basically skipped over the reconciliation and development and went yeah Jason is a batfam member and he doesn't kill anymore. So currently in canon none of this conflict of ideals is likely to be addressed. But a lot of people are interested in writing fics that actually detail the steps of reconciliation which is great and I love those fics. I've just also noticed a trend of fumbling a little when it comes to Cass.
Because the root cause as to why they wouldn't get along is not just because Jason kills people. If Jason was a random crime lord Cass would probably try to help him get free of Gotham and start over somewhere else. Killing people and having conflicting emotions about it is the easiest way to get Cass willing to be your number one sponsor at murderer rehabilitation anonymous. It's Jason being someone personal to the family, and someone who believes that some deaths need to happen, as long as the person is sufficiently repulsive enough to Jason. Or even just as a means to an end to prove a larger point, if they're pathetic and evil enough. That's what would make Cass see red, because she projects herself on every single killer and Jason dismissing the possibility of redemption for them, writing them off as deserving of death, clashes fundamentally with not just everything Cass believes in, but also her whole sense of self. Of course it's not that deep for Jason like he's not going to believe Cass should die because she killed someone as a child. But for Cass is simply IS that deep and you throw in the fact that they're both Bruce's kids and yeah. They can maybe be civil in a room together with the family right up until one of them actually talks. Because like 99% of what they could say is guaranteed to touch a nerve for the other.
It's like: Damian says something hilarious and rude towards Jason and Jason jokes about that time he shot him and Cass immediately connects that with him not feeling bad about shooting Damian and starts grilling him as to why. Because Damian's Bruce's son? Or because he's a killer? Or just to get to the rest of the family? And Dick, Duke and Tim are so tired like Alfred cooked a nice meal can we all just eat pie for one night without having to listen to you two go at it.
Tim: I've literally shot you before do you think maybe we can cool it on fighting about Jason's personal ethics tonight. Because generally that ends with me in pain even if I do nothing but sit here.
Cass: You shot me with consent. Different.
Jason: How are you even more obnoxious than Bruce? Do you ever get tired of being so exhausting to be around with your bullshit righteousness?
Cass: If you're tired I can knock you out. Nice nap for you and fun for me.
Dick: And that's ten minutes in a room together before any threats of physical harm start flying around! Great job you two, a new personal record.
#dc#cassandra cain#batfam#dc rambles#jason todd#Ironically enough if Jason didn't focus on killing “bad” people#And instead was just a regular murderer with no greater point except Yeah I need this person to die as a means to an end#Cass is way more likely to look at him and go: Oh hell yes personal improvement project right here#Going up to Bruce like trust me dad he feels bad about killing that guy I saw his hand hesitate for 0.5 seconds before pulling the trigger#Whereas if Jason is like I'm killing this guy to prove a Point. The world is better off without him in it#Cass sees red like congratulations you triggered a solid 70 of her trauma buttons. Hope you like broken bones.
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tgcf spoilers but the donghua team including this was really such a punch in the gut, especially knowing the full backstory to the second image - it made today's episode even more painful (literally within the first 6 minutes !!! they knew what they were doing) these small nuggets of future spoilers make the episodes even more interesting but DAMN I was NOT ready for this one
#tgcf#tgcf spoilers#like..... i was absolutely speechless when I saw this#donghua team... y'all really said pain this epidode#i want to call these easter eggs but what easter are we egging#even last week's nugget with the masks!!!! except that was a lot lighter than this LMAO#no words this was pure heartbreak#macy speaks#tw death#I'm sorry even the trigger warning is a spoiler
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y'know what
to clarify:
this is irrespective of their toppings and fillings. i am only talking abt the taste, texture, and experience of the doughnuts themselves.
pls do reblog for more answers. &if relevant, tag where you're from. i'm anticipating usa/canada opinions & responses to this mainly, but if you live elsewhere and have Opinions, tag & lemme know.
yeasted/raised doughnuts:
doughnuts where the dough rises through the use of yeast. they are deep fried and develop a pale ring around the middle from frying on both sides and raising even more during the cooking process. they can be glazed, sugared, topped with chocolate etc., have a hole in the middle, and/or be a complete pillow/circle and have a filling.
cake doughnuts:
these doughnuts are risen through the use of leavening agents, like baking powder, baking soda, cream of tartar, etc. they can be baked (in a form pan) or fried (if the batter forms into a shape-holding dough). they're pretty much exclusively in ring shapes/have a hole in the middle. they're topped with any variety of things, and occasionally have inclusions in the doughnut itself, the way muffins and cakes do.
#there is a correct answer here folks and i will be disowning anyone who answers incorrectly#only exceptions are extremely specific food allergies or like migraine triggers#food forts#polls
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genuinely one of the funniest things people who dislike eddie have started doing is treating him going to therapy as like a moral imperative. they’ll be like unless he develops a relationship with his THERAPIST next season i’m not gonna LIKE HIM anymore! instead of just being like i wish they’d stop drawing out the shannon storyline or talking about what they would like to see. the problem of course is that none of these people actually do like eddie so they don’t want to engage with him seriously which is fine but they have resorted to talking about his mental illnesses in the funniest ways instead. i mean that sincerely
#eddie in 7b: textbook triggered by his dead wife’s doppelganger after doing well for a season and a half#people who will die if he is gay: Ha Ha he better not LOOK at anyone next season except FRANK. gulps.
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I have a suggestion! E-Girl Celestia Ludenberg!
E-Ludenberg 🖤💔
#danganronpa#dr thh#celestia ludenberg#danganronpa trigger happy havoc#e girl#teddy's artwork#teddy's art#digital art#anonymous#nothing much to say#except I like this#I mainly like the one with the cat ears#bc I feel like she would actually wear them at one point#I imagine her having those for the first half of middle school#before figuring herself out and getting the money to live her Lolita dreams
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random question, do you think it's possible for someone who has lost their creativity to regain it? ..asking for a friend..
im not sure what your situation is, but i believe everyone has creative potential just from being a human being and you cant just permanently lose your creativity. i struggle with losing creativity at times, usually its when I go into a depressive period. I usually just keep making art through it, ill look through old ideas I wrote down or work on commissions just stuff that doesnt require a ton of creativity but keeps me working on art. even if I dont feel good doing it just doing the work of making art helps me to eventually want to make art again
#i dont rly have any advice for this sorry#but this kind of sounds like burnout#idk if what I do will work for you or not all i can really do is share how i deal w it#i go in and out of depressive episodes kind of like bipolar but without manic episodes#i just feel like total shit for some weeks or months and then feel normal again and its independent of enviornmental stuff or triggers#i cant rly do anything about it except try to lessen the depression w meds and such
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criminal that phil didn't use his deep american narrator voice for all 30 minutes of elevated dread
#y'all need to listen to this loud or on headphones PLEASE#idk if anyone posted this during spooky week but even so no harm bringing it back eh#except the possible deaths it may trigger rip#also i spent so much time adjusting the sound for this hope it sounds good#dan and phil#dapg#dan and phil games#danandphilgames#dpgdaily#phil lester#amazingphil#daniel howell#my stuff#my videos
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"i see him in your eyes, i hear him in your laugh. i think that's why i always found my way back to you..."🫶
pairing : charles leclerc x bianchi!fem reader
summary : after consistently being reunited on the anniversary of the loss of jules and finally allowing the spark to ignite , charles & elena have their wedding day on the 17th of july 2021.
warnings : tears but happy this time, mentions of jules bianchi, childhood friends to lovers to married, mentions of herve leclerc
a/n : like mentioned in the end a/n of the first part, i had to break it into two parts due to reaching the writing block limit or whatever and because i was dumb and all that, i lost all of the last half of what i wrote. and it was because i copied it and then forgot to paste it elsewhere and went to copy the link of the first part to my masterlist so now i have to rewrite it all and i want to scream my house down because it was fucking magnificant and now i have to see if i can remember what i fucking wrote!
17th july 2021 - monte-carlo, monaco
today was the day everyone had been waiting the longest for. it was the wedding day of charles leclerc and elena bianchi. but it was also the six year anniversary since the world alongside the bianchi's and leclerc's lost elena's beautiful brother, jules. but even with such a happy event on what was once such a somber day, they didn't leave out nor did they forget to include jules in every single thing. alongside including charles' father, herve, since no one wanted to have herve forgotten either.
the day had gone smoothly. and now it was the time that everyone had been waiting for. charles had no nerves and hadn't felt shaky at all which people admired as he stood alongside his two brothers and the rest of his closest men in his life at the altar. however, that all changed the second the church doors opened and out came elena and her father philippe.
that was when charles could see his whole world standing in front of him. his soon-to-be wife's smile lighting up the entire church. it had already been fulled with light but the light of elena's smile outshone all of them with just her sweet smile that had never changed over the years the two had known one another. standing next to charles he had his two brothers, enzo and arthur, max, lando, carlos, pierre and joris. elena had the girlfriends of the drivers and her brothers alongside one of their cousins to be paired up with joris.
charles was shocked he was still standing. his legs had started to turn to mush as it felt like it was taking forever for elena and her father to make it to the front of the altar next to him. with his brothers next to him though, charles knew they wouldn't let him fall, because they too, arthur and enzo, were nervous as well. charles and elena had decided if they were going to do one traditional thing at their wedding it was going to be the not seeing one another twenty-fours before their wedding day. even though they loved the idea of having a first look, they decided against it and instead opted for giving one another handwritten notes with a little peek into their written vows to one another to read to the videographer whilst getting ready.
so because they didn't do the first look that was now becoming a more modern tradition at weddings, this was them reuniting with one another and seeing each other again after twenty-four hours. since they couldn't even talk to one another between doors or even text each other. it had been quite literally banned by the bridesmaids and groomsmen. even though they had gone through the twenty-fours without each other perfectly, not even trying to see if they could catch a peek at one another or sneak a cheeky text, it was truly something they'd never do again if they were given the choice.
finally, elena was next to charles at the altar and the celebrant had welcomed everyone and given them permission to sit back down, the ceremony begun. it was a quick introduction and all of a sudden it had gotten to the vows. and even though the only real interaction they had with one another was through the letters they had written and given to each other whilst getting ready and had the teeniest peek to what was being included, it wasn't a real outline of one another's handwritten vows. so because they didn't write their vows together, it was truly a mystery as to what each others vows were. and they loved the thought of getting surprised by one anothers vows since, like mentioned earlier, they didn't really want the typical traditional wedding of saying the traditional sort of vows especially when their love languages were words of affirmation, physical touch and quality time. speaking of the vows, elena was starting them since she had requested to go first and there was no way charles was ever going to be able to argue or say no to her. and besides, he was fine to go second anyway even if he was certain in the fact that he'd be crying during elena's as well as during his own.
taking in a big deep breath, holding charles' hand tightly, elena began her vows. speaking them in english since not everyone at their wedding could speak and understand french.
"charles marc herve perceval leclerc. before i announce to you my promises and vows to you, i just need to tell you that i love you so much and that you have never ever made me doubt your love for me like you think you have. because the truth is, nothing you could say or do could make me doubt you, full stop. even when we weren't attached at the hip after we drifted apart after losing my beloved and beautiful older brother and your beautiful godfather jules. because for those who weren't aware, my family and the leclerc's grew up together and jules, myself, arthur and charles were what was known as the core four. we were attached at the hip. so attached in fact that those around us thought we would die if we weren't next to each other and invading one anothers personal space because for the four of us, with enzo on the rare occasion, had no concept of what the term personal space meant *giggles*..." elena paused to catch her breath before continuing
"...however, that all began to change when things did change. even when the only time we'd get to talk was over the phone or through texts or facetimes, i always knew just how much you loved me. there was never any doubt in my mind that there was a moment in which a switch turned in your mind that changed that feeling that you had for me. nor was there ever a doubt in my mind that the same switch of me not loving you was in my own mind. because there wasn't. there was never a moment in my life where i didn't love you wholeheartedly," she paused again to smile lovingly at charles and to comfort him as everyone watched on
"even when we were towing the thin line between friendship and relationship. even when we were growing up and we didn't know what the word love meant outside of familial love, there was always a small spark that was always ignited when i was around you. so much to the point as we started to grow up, jules and lorenzo amongst those around us started to notice it. everyone except for us because we weren't looking past that familial love due to the fact that both families had grown up together only a mere 28mins apart from each other. however, as we got older things started to change between us and the main one being our relationship since you were starting to inch closer and closer to making it into formula one. and then suzuka 2014 happened and jules had his accident and the world stopped to a grinding halt. we stayed in japan whilst they tried everything they could with their knowledge and it was only enough to bring him back home to france. and then he died. the world was slipped from underneath me and i felt like i was a fish bobbling along for a gasp of air before sinking back down into the depths below me. i watched as you got further in motorsports, reaching f3, f2 and then f1," elena's vows were beautiful but they were only going to get better as charles watched with teary eyes and a huge smile on his face
"but before that, we drifted apart from one another and i think it slowly cut me open that we had drifted apart. through no fault of ourselves but because you had gotten so busy that you had no other choice but to continue on even though you had to watch as i heartbreakingly wanted to give up and almost did. but then, at every anniversary on this very day, we started to magically meet up again on the same day, whether it was in monaco or in france for that one year that i returned back to france *tearful giggles*." everyone giggled at that comment that elena only was in france once during an annviersary for jules
"and we just thought it was a silly conincidence that we were in monaco at the same time for jules one-year anniversary. however, by the second and third year anniversary, we started to realise that it wasn't just a coincidence. there was a reason, a pull from the universe that was bringing us back to one another on this very day for the last six years. it wasn't until the four year anniversary though that it all changed. the spark exploded on that day when i had found you on a beach crying. it broke my heart to find you crying on that beach in monaco. however, you'll never know just how much joy it gave me to see you that day. you had done so well within your sport whereas i had only just made the permanent move to monaco the year earlier to go to university. and it was all because i no longer felt like i was a fish that was drowning and i could finally get up everyday and give myself a reason to wake up..." elena smiled as she continued, proud and shocked by her emotional strength
"...you had told me the reason you were crying and it was because you had found the letter that had a plan within it about how jules wanted to matchmake us together after he had excriciatingly watched us be so oblivious by it. he had written that letter just before he had his final ever race at suzuka..." elena trailed off as sniffles filled the room as her smile stayed unmoved
"...after he had written that letter and that plan, he had given it to arthur with him promising my brother that he'd keep it safe. and if he wasn't going to be alive for the day that his plan of being cupid would actually work and come to furition that it would be arthur that would give charles or myself the letter. except, it wasn't arthur and it was charles that had found it, hence why i had found him crying that day on the beach near my university. well, jules, i am pleased to announce that you playing cupid did work but it was delayed by a few years *tearful giggles*..." elena giggled as she reached her hand to charles' cheek to wipe away the tears that had made their way down
"...whilst it does devastate me that jules had this big of a gut feeling that he wouldn't make it out of that grand prix alive to see this plan work. i'm glad he felt like he could give it to arthur to keep it safe so it wouldn't get lost nor forgotten. it always shocks me to my core that the reason why we are all standing here today is because jules and his soul gave me and charles the light that gave us the guide to find one another on this very day every year. even though we wouldn't see each other on any other day apart from facetime calls and text messages, jules always made sure he had his baby sister and beautiful godson were together on the day he lost his life..." elena took a big breath in as she started to get into the most emotional part of her vows that had her crying to the point there were tears on the little book that she was reading her vows from
"...i mention jules a lot but especially today because whilst this day is now a day filled with happier memories of me and charles beginning our relationship, getting engaged and now married, today was also the day that we did lose jules. and even though he isn't alive to witness this, i can't ignore the fact that the reason why i stand here today and say all of this in front of you is because of jules." elena smiled at her to be husband before she broke eye contact and looked toward the empty chair at the front on charles' that was occupied by a photo frame that housed what elena had always said was her favourite photo of her older brother, jules
"my dear charlie, the reason why i love you so much is all because of jules. not only was he the one that introduced me to you but he was the one that always brought me to you, whether that was when he was alive or when he isn't. in the same way jules loved me, you too loved me. even when i thought i could and would never be loved like that, you still loved me in every version of myself. whether i was on the floor hysterically crying in the gut-wrenching grief of missing jules or if i was having the time of my life and truly radiating joy and laughing. it didn't matter what emotion i was feeling, you never let me forget just how much you truly loved me in the same way jules never let me forget how much he truly loved me. jules...i see him everywhere and everyday but i see him the most in you, charlie. i see him in your eyes, i hear him in your laugh. i think that's why i always found my way back to you even when it seemed as though after the loss of jules we'd never fix that time of us being close in our lives again. but it was then that i should have known that no matter if he's alive or not, jules would never let me stray that far away from you, always bringing me back to my true home and my true love..." it was this part of her vows that really made charles and everyone else cry and emotional, it was like jules was igniting her soul and as though he was standing right next to her as she said all of it
"...charlie, my vows to you are that i'll support you in every single moment in your life. whether it's joyous or it's rock bottom, i want you to know that you will never have to doubt that i won't be there to pick you back up when you fall and celebrate you when you are at the top. i will never go to bed angry because i know life's too short to purposefully hold onto those emotions for too long and because i never want you to think that anything you've done or said has made me angry at you. i never want you to think something you've disagreed with or had a different opinion to me about is of less importance than mine. i want you to know that anything you say to me is important whether it is classed as 'stupid' or not. i want you to know you can trust me with everything and anything in your life. i want you to know that i will go through water, fire, and the deepest ocean to fight for you and make sure you are happy because seeing you upset, angry, insecure is devastating and i never want you to have to go through those same negative emotions that i went through. but in saying that, if you do get sad, angry or insecure, i want you to know that i will be there to pick you right back up because i don't want you to not be supported like i wasn't..." elena trailed off as she stared into charles' eyes as she smiled
"...i promise i'll cry with you, i'll be at every single grand prix because i can't stand only seeing you on the same day once a year *laughter*. and you best believe i'll be wearing all the ferrari gear in support of my gorgeous husband and his just as gorgeous teammate *laughter*. and i also promise that i'll dance with you in every corner of our house, i'll sing with you even though you really can't sing and should only stick to f1 *laughter* and i will always make sure that no matter how quickly or how long it takes, that i will make sure you get the loving, happy family of your own that you've always wanted. i love you so much my dearest charlie and i don't think i could find anyone else in this world to be marrying but you. i owe all of this life and my joy to you," elena smiles as she gives her vow book back to her maid of honour, rebecca, carlos' girlfriend
it was silent for a moment or two since everyone was in shock at elena's vows. they were the best wedding vows every single person in that church had heard before by a bride or a groom. the church then erupted into booms of cheers and whistles as elena shyly giggled. the day she had written her vows she had written them on the same beach that she had heard and found charles crying back in 2019 on the four-year anniversary. and charles had no idea because he was having fun in the water alongside carlos, max, lando, daniel, joris, enzo and arthur. the girlfriends though were surrounding elena as she wrote them even though every time elena lifted her head up to crack her neck, the girls quickly looked away and continued their 'tanning session' only for them to be little nosy nellies and go back to watching elena write her vows the second she'd put her head back down and continue writing. however, they truly had no idea that these were the vows she had written. and they were blown away, it was as though edgar allen poe had written them just because of how poetic her words were.
now it was charles' turn and he was now freaking out. taking in a deep breath the same way elena did before hers, elena held charles' free hand tightly, caressing his hand as they smiled at one another.
"elena alexandra bianchi. before i announce to you and this church my vows to you, i thought it was important to remind you of just how much i love you. we always fight that we love one another more than the other. it's funny, truly because of how heated these arguments get *giggles*. however, the reason why i tell you that i love you more isn't just to one up you or because i'm making it into a competition of who loves who more because i'm never saying that i could love you more than you could love me. i say i love you more because i love you more than the bad days ahead of us. i love you more than any fight we will ever have. i love you more than any obstacle we'll face whether that's in regards to us getting pregnant or any illnesses. i love you more than i'll love formula one because whilst that is my job and something i love, that will never take the crown when it's lined up next to you. i love you more than comfortable silence that we can sit in for hours. i love you more than hearing a chord progression of my piano. i love you more than anything in this world could make me love. i could never pretend to love you, even when we were growing up it never crossed my mind that loving you was a joke or that it wasn't something i made up or that it wasn't real..." charles was doing amazingly, he had managed to compose himself to the point where he was only teary-eyed but it was clear he was back to the verge of those tears slipping down his cheeks
"...i'm not someone who tends to regret things in my life because that's not how i like to live my life. however, if i was to say i have one regret in my life, it would have been the ways in which i lied to my father herve, my godfather jules and you when we weren't dating but on that fine line between being just friends and something more. i dont even regret lying to myself because i don't need nor deserve that apology but you three, my father and jules do need it. i remember the day of jules accident, it was just before he was leaving so he could start the race when he walked past me and stopped me. telling me he had to tell me something important and that it was about you. and of course, the second your name was mentioned, i was locked in and nothing could break that focus *tearful giggles*. he had told me that the reason why you would hug me so tightly because since forever, you've given me and no one else, the tightest, most home-like hugs. jules had said it was because...because you were so worried i would disappear into thin air. but he had also mentioned something else and it had taken me by surprise that i didn't know how to react. i mentioned this earlier but the hugs i got from you, elena, were hugs that no one else was allowed to have. they were only reserved for me and it wasn't until jules had brought it up before that race that i realised. he had told me that he reason why you would hug me so tight was because you were so scared of losing me in the same way you would lose jules everytime he left for a race and when you hugged me, it was you projecting the way you felt so frightened for jules and how much you missed him onto me because of the fact you were in love with me and you were so worried you were going to lose me in the same way we ended up losing jules. and because i'm seen as jules' replacement, it was easy for you to project those feelings to me when we'd hug because that was when i realised that was the same reason why i'd hug you so tightly as well..." charles trailed off as his tears started to stream down his cheeks as elena smiled and wiped them away
"...that night after we told one another our last ever interactions with jules without even realising it would be forever, you had also said something that still makes me feel uneasy. you had made a pinky promise with jules that if he had made the podium at the end of that race that he would finally get the charles x elena hug that he had always wanted but was never able to get. after you told me that, of course my heart shattered but then i pulled you into the tight hug that had meant to be reserved for jules that night..." charles' voice cracked as it failed away, closing his eyes as his head dropped down
elena's heart breaking as she brought her hand to his cheek and softly lifted his head up. resting her forehead against his, she softly reassured him and told him to keep going. he was doing a beautiful job and from the looks of it, he hadn't had that much left of his vows left. nodding his head, he composed himself and continued.
"...all my life i had always looked up to jules and aspired to follow him through life. and unfortunately, i'll never get that opportunity for that ended on this very day six years ago. but for the last three years now, beautiful and more happier memories have been made on this day. like me finally asking you to be my girlfriend after you found me crying over finding jules' letter on the beach in monte-carlo *tearful giggles*. me proposing to you the year after that in 2020 during the afterparty that had us celebrating pierre's win at the italian grand prix in monza. and now today, the day in which i vow you my entire life, to support you when you are struggling, to laugh and cry with you. to love you without hesitation and without fear of being judged. to help give and provide for our family that i'll help with raising. to do anything you ask even if it means leaving formula one if it is what needs to happen. today is the day that i say i do want to marry you. today is the day i stand here proudly and say that there is no one else i could dream about marrying because there is no one in this world or in any universe that even comes close to you and the way you make me feel. nor is there anyone else in this world and universe that could light up my life in the same way you light up every place you walk into. i know this is something you've never actually asked me but i promise that in every single universe that could have existed in this world that isn't this one, i would find you and i'd love you in every single one. even if it meant in a different universe this day wasn't happening, this burning love i feel wouldn't disappear. but i am happy to say that in this universe i don't have to worry about that day ever happening that i'd have to doubt your love for me. i love you so much, elena alexandra bianchi and if it's anyone's honour to be loved in this relationship, it's me..." charles trails off as everyone thinks he is done but with a cheeky but tearful smile he continues as everyone giggles at the antics
"...elena, i also promise you that i will be your biggest fan and your biggest confidant. i promise to always fight for you and with you, even if the fight is as serious as fighting over which colour we should paint the walls *tearful giggles*. i promise to trust and value your opinions because no matter how much you tell me it's stupid or not important, it is. i promise to always validate your emotions because it's not silly or stupid if you are crying over a movie or over missing jules. nor is it silly or stupid if you are jumping from wall to wall because of something that you are so excited over like your favourite singer or band. i never want you to think you can't come to me when you are crying or when you are speaking so quickly to the point it's not elligible because you are so excited. i also promise the silly things like sharing my food with you, letting you look so much more better in my clothes than me *giggles*, to share the piano with you because whilst you like to be modest about it, you really are an amazing pianist and to share the highs and lows of this wonderful thing we call life as the leclerc's. whilst it may be an uphill climb it's not too much of a climb that it has to be done alone. and i also promise that i will always choose you over and over again even when you force me to choose something different, i never will because there isn't something different that i would want, only you. falling for you wasn't falling at all, elena. it was walking into a house and knowing you're home." was how charles finished his vows and similar to elena it was silent
of course, everyone knew that english wasn't the easiest language for charles. however, it was as though he was as fluent as a fluent english speaker could get. whilst his accent peaked through on the odd quiver of emotion, it never lasted too long. applause finally erupted through the church as it echoed as everyone finally remembered that applauding was in fact what they were supposed to be doing. and then, came the part that everyone had been longing the entire ceremony for. the moment in which charles and elena were finally mr and mrs leclerc.
"...now that our couple have said they do agree on holy matrimony, it is my biggest honour to announce to this congregation of those that are loved by the couple that i am introducing you all to mr and mrs charles and elena leclerc!" cheers and squeals of excitement overwhelmed the giggling celebrant as he continued when the noise fizzled out
"charles, you may now finally kiss your bride!" he announced before stepping out of the way so the photographer could get photos of the kiss
once again, cheers and squeals bounched between the walls of the church as charles dipped his beautiful wife down to the floor. his hand on the base of her back and the other supporting her head as elena giggled wholeheartedly into the kiss. everyone watching on with huge smiles and teary faces as their hands began to feel sore from all the applause. charles and elena finally broke out of the kiss as they then walked back down the aisle together as husband and wife whilst the wedding party followed behind them.
❤️
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elenaleclerc taking a page out of my vows for this caption: "it didn't matter what emotion i was feeling, you never let me forget just how much you truly loved me in the same way jules never let me forget how much he truly loved me. jules...i see him everywhere and everyday but i see him the most in you, charlie. i see him in your eyes, i hear him in your laugh. i think that's why i always found my way back to you even when it seemed as though after the loss of jules we'd never fix that time of us being close in our lives again. but it was then that i should have known that no matter if he's alive or not, jules would never let me stray that far away from you, always bringing me back to my true home and my true love."
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charlesleclerc putain, tu m'as encore fait pleurer chérie fuck, you got me crying again sweetheart. i love you so much my angel forever and always
elenaleclerc charlesleclerc i love you so much more my charlie!
maxverstappen1 that singular moment in your vows had me sobbing, elena and i'm on the verge of being in that state once again!
elenaleclerc maxverstappen maxie, you are such a sweetheart! and i am so shocked that i wasn't crying because i was weeping when i wrote them down whilst we had that beach day
kellypiquet oh my gosh, that passage of your vows had me and max SOBBING! i can't even, elena, you are quite literally a poet!
elenaleclerc kellypiquet oh stop it, kelly, i am by no means a poet even though i am at university for advanced english literature.
landonorris jesus lord no, not this passage again! i just finished crying over it and now i'm gonna start crying all over again!
elenaleclerc landonorris i'm sorry lando but i just had to, it's my favourite excerpt of my vows! it's okay if it's too much for little lando norris, i still love you!
carlossainz55 the best part of the vows for sure my love! you had all of us in tears
elenaleclerc carlossainz55 oh carlos, that is so sweet of you to say so thank you! and i will issue a public apology for the tears and dehydration you all went through!
iamrebeccad i am biting my cheeks so hard to not cry reading this post rn, elena!
elenaleclerc iamrebeccad oh i love you rebecca, so much!
francisca.cgomes these photos with that specific passage omg i'm gonna scream, cry and throw up!
elenaleclerc francisca.cgomes i don't think you're the only one doing that kika haha
oscarpiastri these words were heartbreaking but in the best way possible, elena!
elenaleclerc oscarpiastri thank you oscie! i'm glad you and lily could make it!
arthurleclerc don't make me cry again, elena!
elenaleclerc arthurleclerc i'm sorry thuthur, i'll make it up to you i promise!
sebastianvettel beautiful words, elena! jules is for sure the soul that brought you and charles back to each other
elenaleclerc sebastianvettel thank you seb and jules truly is the soul that made all of this happen and i am so grateful for it!
f1gossip omg i am crying! and if that's only one passage of your vows then i can only imagine the rest of your vows and how much i'd cry reading the rest!
elenaleclerc f1gossip aw, you are so sweet! and trust me, whilst this one was the passage that made everyone cry the most, there was one other one that was just as close! i promise we'll post the wedding video as soon as we get it with me and charles' full vows included xx
bianchiphotos i think i just heard my heart stop @ "i see him in your eyes, i hear him in your laugh. i think that's why i always found my way back to you even when it seemed as though after the loss of jules we'd never fix that time of us being close in our lives again." and at "my charlie". definitely sleeping, crying and throwing up on the highway tonight because if someone doesn't love me like that then i don't want it!
elenaleclerc bianchiphotos omg you are so sweet! and i think a couple more people are going to join you on that highway tonight but don't stay there for too long, it's too dangerous sweetie xx
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charlesleclerc copying my wife, here is my favourite passage from my vows: "and i also promise that i will always choose you over and over again even when you force me to choose something different, i never will because there isn't something different that i would want, only you. falling for you wasn't falling at all, elena. it was walking into a house and knowing you're home."
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elenaleclerc i love you so much my charlie! i don't want something different either because nothing is better than you
charlesleclerc elenaleclerc my beautiful wife forever and ever
pierregasly why are you guys still trying to make us cry? the wedding was yesterday, surely you can let us survive one day without crying again!
charlesleclerc pierregasly i'm sorry, i just couldn't wait any longer to post the photos!
lewishamilton beautiful words charles! congratulations once again to you and elena's wedding, it was an honour to be apart of it!
charlesleclerc lewishamilton thank you lewis, it was a pleasure and honour having you there as our guest!
maxverstappen1 surprise surprise, i'm back to crying again
charlesleclerc maxverstappen1 haha i really am sorry!
leclerc_pascale i love you my precious boy! congratulations to you and beautiful elena
charlesleclerc leclerc_pascale i love you too maman and elena sends her love as well
philippebianchi thank you for making my baby girl the happiest she's ever been! jules is for sure glad that his plan worked
charlesleclerc philippebianchi thank you philippe for still letting me love your daughter even after the distance that we had between us and yes, jules is definitely glad it worked
f1gossip jesus, charles, your vows are also making me cry! do i wanna know the rest of your vows as well? back to the highway we all go!
charlesleclerc f1gossip haha, i am sorry! and omg please don't go to the highway, that's dangerous!
username oh, i just realised elena calls charles "my charlie" and now i don't know if that's the sweetest thing in the world or if i wanna follow f1gossip and sleep on the highway
charlesleclerc username like i said to f1gossip please don't go to the highway it's dangerous and cold! and yes, it melts my heart too and makes me get teary-eyed when she calls me 'my charlie' as well!
arthurleclerc another set of vows that had me crying, yay me!
charlesleclerc arthurleclerc haha, max basically commented the same thing!
username "even when you force me to choose something different, i never will because there isn't something different that i would want, only you" - i want that, someone, anyone...please? can i have this too?
charlesleclerc username i promise you will get it one day, it may not be in this near future but it will happen and you'll get to look back to this post and this comment and be happy that you have it xx
fin
well, even though i had to rewrite it all, i think i managed to remember majority of the vows except i do think this version was a hell of a lot better than the first one. but now it's finished i am so relieved since this had been in my drafts for a few days now which never usually happens. so i hope you guys do enjoy this happy ending because i truly think this two-parter is one of my favourites i've ever written! also, just realised in this part that i had been spelling philippe bianchi, jules bianchi's dad's, name wrong the whole time until i properly looked up the spelling so, that is my bad so i will change the spelling if i mention philippe in the first part tomorrow since it's way past midnight when i'm finally posting this!
©⠀amberjazmyn's original work. do not translate or steal any of my fics. 2024
#formula one#charles leclerc x bianchi!fem reader#charles leclerc and leclerc!fem reader#fluff#wedding#f1 grid x platonic!bianchi!fem reader#mentions of jules bianchi#mentions of herve leclerc#no other trigger warnings except the same ones from part one#if any of these topics trigger you please do not read because it is not my fault if these triggers and warnings are ignored
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